Alameda County's
Fall/Winter 2014, Volume 1, Issue 3
Renewing Life’s Possibilities A magazine for the mature
Love of Family The
30
Health & wellness
Contents 12
08 10 12 14 16 18
Boomer Sex & Whats New & What Works Skin Care simplified Sex in the Golden Years When is Medicare “Supplement “ Not a Supplement ? Women & Orgasms Sex Life Support
Finance 20 22
What is Your Plan for Living ? Prevent Family Drama
Entertainment 24 26 28 30 32 34
48
Lionell Richey Eggs-Scuse Me ! Backyard Bubbles Destinations : Romantic Revivals I’m Cha Cha I’m a Poet and I Know It Literary Profile of Vicki Ward
Consumer Central 35
Joseph Larkin Alameda County Commission on Consumer Affairs
Life Style & Home
30
36 38 40 42 44 46 48
Starting a conversation Center for Elders independence Helps Seniors continue to live at Home The World Institute on Disabilities Pleasure Seekers Spring Forward into New Fashion Passing the Baton Understanding Veterans Administration Benefits
Featured Articles 50 52 54 56
What is Family to You Perception Tips on Leaving a Legacy to Your Adult Children Part ! of 3 Part Series The families in My Life
Alameda County & The Bay Area News and Information 57 58 60 61 62
California Coordinated Care Initiative & What It Means to Seniors in Alameda County Alameda Contra Costa (Ca) Chapter Of The Links, Incorporated Awards Ann C. Cato Scholarship 2-1-1 Assists Senior Access Services Going on to Glory Creates ATBC Scholarship Program Prepare your Family to Prosper RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 3
editorial note
From the Founder Last week my cousin, Mellow Sam Henry, called me from Chicago to announce that his eighth great-great-great-grandchild had been born. He reminded me, “I’m 83 years old, Baby, and I have 19 kids, 45 grandchildren, and 37 great-grandchildren.” That got me thinking about my maternal grandparents and how they both had seven siblings and how they married and began families, one of them ultimately producing 12 kids. Then there’s my father who had 12 siblings. Of course, we know what that meant to our family. I thought to myself, “WOW! I have so many stories of my family life, not to mention what Dad always said: Give back to your community by affiliating yourself with an organization that suits your passion.” So of course I am a member of many worthy organizations and they enlarge my family. My church is also my family and a group of women are definitely my “Sister Girls.” Yes! I have an extraordinary support mechanism in my family that is unique, loving, and truly interesting bet your family is, too. The focus of this issue is “THE LOVE OF FAMILY.” Enjoy the articles written by Renews’ Editorial Contributors who bring to life their love of family and ways in which we can take care of ourselves and our loved ones. I am excited to introduce to our loyal readership, Melody Fuller, Food and Wine Editor. Melody is an international wine, food, and travel writer. She recently accepted an invitation to the highly regarded Professional Symposium for Wine Makers at Meadowbrook in Napa Valley. She has traveled to many countries to meet with world-class chefs and winemakers. Melody is sure to recommend exquisite wine and champagne for every occasion. We are also excited to introduce you to Vivian Stone, our Entertainment Editor. She is a Partner with Full Circle Outreach and Marketing Group. Vivian has an extensive background in law firm and hotel management. Coming to us with a notable pool of Hollywood luminaries and BET connections, Vivian is sure to bring us first-run news of the rich and famous. Renew publishes two times a year: Fall/Winter and Spring/Summer. We’re looking forward to our Spring/Summer 2014 issue and our focus on Alameda County Social Services for the Mature-50+. I’m “Renewing My Life’s Possibilities “and you should, too!
e t t e n i o t n A
Please submit letters, comments and questions to info@renewlifemagazine.com 4 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
E d i to r i a l Te a m Creative Editorial Director Antoinette Warren
Editor-in - Chief Antoinette Warren
Entertainment Editor Vivian Stone
Advice Columnist Mary Ellen Jones
Food and Wine Editor Melody fuller
Fashion Columnist Camari Henderson
Literary Columnist Dera Williams
Alameda County, News & Information Columnist Wendy Peterson
Consumer Central Editor Joseph Larkin Alameda County Commission on Consumer Affairs
Lifestyle & Home Columnist Tanya Troung
Printed and published in the United States. Published 2 times per year. Copyright 2013 RENEW MAGAZINE. No portions of this work may be copied or reproduced without express written permission of the Publisher. We can be contacted at (510) 936-1627
CONTRIBUTORS FIRST NAME
LAST NAME
PROFESSIONAL
Dean
Ferrier
Retired
SHORT BIO
Ms. Ferrier was a US Diplomat Going On To Glory Creates ATBC and Spanish Linguistics Music/Scholarship Program Specialist
Executive Director, Ms. Jones worked with CAL Collaborating PREPARE; UC Berkeley & Agencies Responding Center for Infectious Disease to Disaster (CARD)
Ana Marie
Jones
Wendy
Peterson
Executive Director, Senior Services Coalition
Mitch
Reitman
Dera
ARTICLE NAME
PHONE
505.332.9428 3.313.476.1607
Prepare Your Family To Prosper
510.451.3140
Ms. Peterson has worked in the field of aging, policy & services for 13 years.
California’s Coordinated Care Initiative & What It Means To Seniors In Alameda County
510.832.3040
Reitman, MSW, MA EDEN I & R, Inc.
Mr.Reitman has experience in Development/Marketing
2-1-1 Assists Senior Access Services
510.727.9565
Williams
Literary Columnist
Ms. Williams is an avid writer & is published in books, anthologies & scripts.
Literary Profile of Vickie Ward
510.816.2869
Beverly
Harrison
The Links Inc., Alameda/Contra Costa Ca. Chapter
A national non-profit women’s service organization
Alameda Contra Costa Chapter of the Links Inc.Ann C. Cato: Scholarship Recipient
510.429.8369
Joseph
Larkin
Commissioner, Alameda County Commission On Consumer Affairs
Diana L.
Bell
Mr. Larkin is a real estate Alameda County Commission On broker for the San Francisco Consumer Affairs Bay Area.
510.208.9672
Retiree
Ms. Bell has many interests abroad & is a renowned world traveler.
Destination Decisions: Romantic Revivals
510.530.3744
Fuller-Lewis
International wine, food & travel writer
Ms. Fuller-Lewis has spent 30 years learning about wine, food & travel.
Eggs-scuse Me! Backyard Bubbles
510.893.1929
Vivian
Stone
Partner, Full Circle Outreach & Marketing Group
Ms. Stone has over 30 years of Law Firm & Hotel Management
Lionel Richie
415.987.9727
Carlotta
Warren
Poet/Spoken Word Lyricist
John
Bilorusky
President/CoFounder, WISeR
Mr. Bilorusky co-founded an alternative communityoriented academic institution, WISeR.
Betty
Elder
Counselor/Writer
Ms. Elder focuses on sexual intimacies of relationships.
Executive/Clinical Director; Therapist
Mr.Feldman is a licensed marriage & family therapist focusing on intimacy, personal & relationship problems.
Melody
Aaron
Feldman
Ms Warren has various administration experience in I’m ChaCha, I’m A Poet & I Know It senior housing
The Families In My Life
Women & Orgasms
Sex Life Support
510.936-1627
510.655.2830
510.601.8164
888-217-2773 x3
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 5
contributors
Roni
Gates
Real Estate Broker
Patsy
Lax Lockhart
Educator
Dr. Victoria
Lillian M.
Pat
Endy Dr. Anthony
Melinda A.
Dr. Ingrid
Cynthia John
Dianna
Ms. Gates has an extensive career in freelance journalism & photography. Ms. Lax Lockhart is a Cross Cultural Educator and Social Justice Advocate who incorporates Socratic methods that influence critical thinking.
Lee, Ph.D
Physician
Dr. Lee is a clinical psychologist specializing in group therapies & sexual intimacies.
Neely
Professor University of Liberia
Ms. Neely was instrumental in developing the curriculum of early childhood development.
Ms. Baxter is a retirement, estate & asset protection Baxter planning, long-term care, life & disability insurance specialist. Principal, Mr. Ukoha-Ajike specializes in Ukoha-Ajike,Esq. UKOHA-AJIKE Law estate planning, business tax Group, P.C. planning and consulting. Dr. Jones specializes in Jones Physician internal medicine, HIV & AIDS. Ms.Moros is the founder of a consulting firm based in Moros Medicare Consultant Alameda County focusing on Medicare & Medicaid Dr. Roseborough is a boardcertified dermatologist Roseborough Physician specializing in the disorders of the hair, skin & nails. Rev. Carter Hill is also a Health & Hospice Carter Hill minister, motivational Educator speaker & songwriter. Mr. Forrett is a volunteer in American Legions Forrett the SF Bay Veteran & Public Volunteer Service programs. Owner, REAP Legacy, Inc.
Garrett
Camari
Henderson
Mary Ellen
Jones
Regina
Tardy
Kat
Zigmont
Perceptions
209.568.5203
What is Family To You?
510.936-1627
Boomer Sex: What’s New & What Works
510.882.2330
Tips for leaving a legacy
707.648.1429
What Is Your Plan For Living?
510.409.0086
Prevent Family Drama
510.834.9944
Sex In The Golden Years
510.268.1800
When Is A Medicare “Supplement” Not A Supplement?
925.202.7552
Skin Care Simplified
510.452.4900
Starting The Conversation
510.427.4624
Understanding Veteran’s Administration Benefits for Seniors
408.964.6800
Director of Ms. Garrett has a background Center For Elders’ Independence Communication & in advertising, marketing & Helps Seniors Continue To Live Planning for Center of project management. At Home Elders’ Independence Ms. Henderson is founder of Camari Henderson Design Fashion Designer/ and ISSCA Uzzah Fashion, a Spring Forward Into New Fashion Master Pattern Maker non-profit focusing on breast cancer. Ms.Jones is also an oratorical speaker and historical Writer Pleasure Seekers researcher on AfricanAmerican ancestries. Ms. Tardy is a published Owner, Passing The Baton Is More Than author, playwright and PER-FECT Words A Notion documentary film script Publishing Company writer. Ms. Zigmont is a skilled Executive Projects problem solver and a Coordinator for the The World Institute On Disability practicing community World Institute on activist. Disability
510.433.1160 x7135
415.496.6199
707.428.6922
415.410.6154
510-225-6343
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 7
Boomer Sex
What's New and What Works By Dr. Victoria Lee, Clinical Psychologist
Count on boomers* to refuse to accept the idea that qualifying for AARP or even Medicare makes us less interested in sex. We protest, and we refuse to head for the rocking chair where sex is concerned! 8 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
L
et’s replace the sexual stereotypes of 30-year-old perfect bodies with new images. I like this image: a nude man with a receding hairline and the hands of a violinist strokes the bare body of a woman with long grey hair. There’s a look of joy on both their faces.
Health & wellness
we move into and through later life, our task is to inform ourselves of the changes that may occur, and to learn to work with rather than against those changes. We must affirm that we are never too old for enjoyable lovemaking. Even a quadriplegic person can give satisfying oral loving to a willing partner. A woman who has lost a breast can provide sweet loving. Medical conditions from herpes to cancer don’t have to prevent some form of lovemaking.
What Works What really works in lovemaking is understanding every sexual experience as a chance to express your loving essence. I call this sacred sexuality. This approach rejects evaluations based on size of body parts, weight, or preconceived ideas of what every sexual experience should look like.
Three Helpful Principles
Reinventing Sexuality In 23 years of working with couples, I’ve learned that most of us have little support in developing a sustainable approach to sexuality--one that enables us to reject the cultural messages that want us to view sexuality as an athletic competition for men and a beauty contest for women. Too many couples struggle with feelings of anxiety and inadequacy. This happens even in youth, and for many it worsens with age. Lots of people have what I call “report card sex.” At the end of this kind of lovemaking you have to check in with your partner (or yourself ) to get a grade and find out if you did it “right” this time.
Body Changes Needn’t Be Barriers Can a man whose erections have become less reliable still be a good lover? Can a woman with stretch marks and wrinkles be a desirable sexual partner? Boomers have a chance to answer these questions with a resounding yes. As
❶ A great lover is one who can connect heart energy to the body. Most women and many men long for emotional closeness as part of their sexual experiences. The most direct route to that closeness is expressing your feelings in the moment. “I feel nervous right now--I’m afraid I won’t satisfy you.” Or “I’m still mad about what you said this morning.”When couples create enough safety together that feelings like these can be freely expressed, things change. Closeness can grow even in a moment which began with fatigue or anger or fear. ❷ There are no “right” or “wrong” ways to make love. Foreplay + intercourse + orgasm is not the only menu plan. There are no rules except mu-
tual consent, and no harm done to either party. As we age, erections and orgasms can become less frequent and less reliable. A bad knee can get in the way of a woman’s preference to be above rather than below. Vaginal changes make result in pain that never occurred before. A man who used to get very aroused from thoughts or visual contact alone, may need direct penile stimulation as he ages, and even then erections may be illusive or less enduring. For both men and women, orgasms may take much longer to reach, or they may not occur at all. What counts is loving touch given and received. What counts is a time of cherishing each other and expressing that physically in any way we can. ❸ Sex can be just as good in later life as it was in youth. It can even be better--much, much better because of our increased ability to open our hearts, and understand the preciousness of the opportunity to be with a loving partner in this way. The possibility of sharing ecstatic states--those rare and precious gems of lovemaking--is increased when we come together in that state of mindfulness. Taking a long time to make love--rather than trying to fit it in after the late TV news--increases this possibility as well. Here’s to the boomer insistence on maintaining our youthful options, and reinventing ourselves at any point. These attitudes can serve us well in being happy lovers at every age. Keep on believing! * For the purposes of this article, I’m defining boomers are defined as those born in the 40’s, 50’s and early 60’s.
Dr. Victoria Lee is a clinical psychologist who works with couples and individual on relationship and sexual issues. The Couples Wisdom Institute is located in El Sobrante, CA. Some services can be provided on line or via phone or Skype. Website: www.coupleswisdom.com. Email: drlee@coupleswisdom.com Phone: 510.882.2330. Books: Ecstatic Lovemaking: An Intimate Guide to Soulful Sex. The Rumi Secret: Spiritual Lessons of History’s Most Revered Poet The books are available on her website, at Amazon.com or can be ordered at any bookstore. Dr. Lee welcomes your feedback on this article, and invites you to visit her Advice Blog on her website if you’d like to ask questions.
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 9
10 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Skin care simplified essential steps to beautiful skin at any age
You’ve heard it all before—a wonder cream, a breakthrough injection, a high-tech laser—all touting permanent and skin-changing results in just a few applications. If only it were that simple. By Dr. Ingrid Roseborough
The truth is, for most of us, achieving and maintaining radiant skin is a life-long project. No one oral or topical medication or procedure is miraculous. In my dermatology practice, I counsel patients about state-of-the-art medical and surgical treatment options, but I spend an equal amount of time talking about basic skin care. I find that a sustained improvement in tone, texture and clarity of skin can come from a simple and consistent routine. From tweens to seniors, here are fundamental steps for healthy skin.
Cleanse Twice daily, we have the opportunity to start with a clean, fresh surface that is ready to face the day. Cleansers remove particles such as dirt, oil, and superficial skin cells from the skin
surface. They prepare the skin for medications, moisturizers and makeup, and remove superficial impurities that decrease radiance. A variety of skin cleansers are available. In general, I prefer simple cleansers that gently, but efficiently, clean and hydrate the skin. If acne, textural imperfections or uneven skin tone are a concern, an exfoliating cleanser or one with alpha or beta hydroxy acid may be helpful. Keep in mind that these agents must be used carefully; over aggressive treatment can cause inflammation and may worsen the underlying problem.
Treat After a thorough cleansing, topical medications and serums may be applied to the skin. These may be over-the-counter or prescription medications that treat medical conditions. The skin may be slightly moist when creams are applied, but for some treatments, dry skin is best. Be sure to read the application instructions or ask your prescribing doctor for recommendations. Use a light touch when applying cream to the skin. Thick application does not necessarily enhance efficacy. I advocate the “dot and spread” method: apply a small amount of the topical cream to the index finger, dot it around the affected area, and gently spread to produce a thin, even coat.
ile, we are more susceptible to environmental conditions, injury, infection, and itch. A hydrating skin cream can keep the barrier intact, and even reduce the need for topical anti-inflammatory medications. Finding the right moisturizer for your skin type can be a challenge. Excessively dry skin may require heavy oil-based ointments and creams, while oily skin may respond best to lighter lotion-based formulations. Skin emollients should be applied at least once a day, every day, preferably to moist skin. More frequent application may be required when ambient humidity is low. For patients who use topical medications, remember the rule—medications first, moisturizers second.
Protect Last but not least, let’s hear it for sun protection! There is no question that a lifetime of intense sun exposure can have serious, even life-threatening effects on skin health. The research data is unequivocal; certain types of skin cancer are directly linked to mutations caused by ultraviolet solar radiation. In addition, ultraviolet light breaks down collagen, leading to wrinkles and premature aging. Deeply pigmented skin is at risk too—sun exposure can increase unwanted pigmentation and contribute to markedly uneven skin tone. What can we do to protect
Cleansers remove particles such as dirt, oil, and superficial skin cells from the skin surface.
Moisturize Application of moisturizer is one of the most crucial (and often overlooked) steps in a skin care routine. Moisturizers assist in the most basic function of skin: barrier maintenance and repair. When the skin is dry, cracked and frag-
our skin? Seek shade, apply sunscreen, and wear sun-protective clothing. If possible, it’s a good idea to avoid midday sun, and engage in outdoor activities in the early morning and early evening hours. Sunscreen should be a minimum of SPF 30 and must be reapplied to ensure all-day protection. Sun protective clothing may include hats, sleeves, long pants and eyewear. Every little bit helps; small changes in your daily care regimen can result in healthy, beautiful skin for a lifetime. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 11
Sexual Health in
the Golden By Anthony Jones MD
Years 12 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
I
t is a commonly shared misconception that senior citizens don’t have sex and aren’t interested in having sex. In fact, sexual activity is an important source of pleasure and fulfillment for many, as well as a natural part of human interaction, and an important part of many relationships. Following the death of a spouse, some seniors find themselves starting new relationships or dating for the first time in many years. With the availability of modern phenomena ranging from internet dating sites to Viagra and other medications for erectile dysfunction, there have never been more opportunities to engage in sexual activity. There are physiologic reasons why sex becomes different later in life, but these changes don’t necessarily mean the end of sex. Hormones are the driving force behind both our interest in sex, and our ability to engage in sexual activity. Human sex hormones naturally decline later in life. Whether by myth or personal experience, many are familiar with the hormone changes associated with menopause. But in fact, men also experience a change in their major sex related hormones later in life After menopause, women have much lower levels of female hormone or estrogen. The drop in estrogen levels ultimately results in the stopping of menstrual cycles. In addition, some of the body’s tissues which are most sensitive to effects of estrogen, undergo changes when they are no longer exposed to higher hormone levels. This process most notably affects the tissues of the vagina and the genital area. These structures are very sensitive to estrogen and become atrophied or thinned when estrogen stimulation declines. The vaginal lining can also become dry and lack the natural secretions that serve as a lubricant during sexual activity. This can in turn result in pain or discomfort during sexual intercourse, or alteration in the sensation of touch and pressure to this part of the body. Medical treatment in the form of oral or even topical estrogen replacement therapy may be an option in some cases. Men have a similar phenomenon involving hormone decline. Levels of male hormone or testosterone often start to decline early in middle age. Testosterone is responsible for hair growth, libido or sex drive, and changes that are responsible for achieving erections. Without adequate testosterone, the tissues of the penis are not able to achieve
adequate erection, or orgasm. In addition, men with low testosterone may experience generalized fatigue, mood changes and loss of muscle mass. Systemic testosterone replacement is often effective to restore adequate levels of testosterone. In some cases, men can suffer from erectile dysfunction even with adequate levels of testosterone. In these situations Viagra or other PDE5 inhibitor drugs may be an appropriate treatment option. An important complicating factor that impacts both sexual interest or libido, as well as sexual function and performance is, the presence of other medical conditions. Chronic medical illness becomes more common with advancing age. A number of medical conditions that impact both nerve function and vascular system function can contribute to sexual dysfunction. The most common conditions include diabetes, hypertension, and elevated cholesterol. Sexual dysfunction tends
A potential hazard, and important aspect to sexual health is avoiding sexually transmitted infections or STI’s. Older adults may have the misconception that the risk of contracting an STI doesn’t apply to them. Many seniors grew up and matured during an era that didn’t have the safe sex messages we see in today’s society. And even today, most of these messages are targeted toward a younger audience, and seniors may not see them as relevant. Also, female seniors might be less likely to use protection due to lack of concern about becoming pregnant. In reality, there has been an extremely rapid increase in the number of STIs in the senior community. A 2008 article from the British Journal “Sexually Transmitted Infections” found that STIs in the over 45 population doubled in less than a decade. Furthermore, it’s estimated that nearly 20% of adults seeking medical care for HIV in Britain are over age 50.
Depression is a common cause for both low libido and sexual dysfunction. In some cases, antidepressant medications themselves can interfere with normal sexual function. In these situations, they can often be changed to an alternate agent. to be much worse when these conditions are poorly controlled. In some cases, erectile dysfunction in men can improve with bringing diabetes or high blood pressure under control. Further complicating this picture, some of the medications used to treat conditions like hypertension can cause or exacerbate erectile dysfunction in men. Mental and emotional health is also important for normal sexual function. Depression is a common cause for both low libido and sexual dysfunction. In some cases, antidepressant medications themselves can interfere with normal sexual function. In these situations, they can often be changed to an alternate agent.
Sex and sexuality later in life is heavily influenced by natural processes involved with aging. In some cases, the natural hormonal decline and body related changes can be addressed with medical treatment. Chronic medical conditions can impact both libido and sexual function, but this can be minimized with effective treatment of those conditions. STI awareness and prevention are critical to a healthy sex life and people should discuss screening for STIs with their healthcare provider. Sex and sexuality may look very different to the mature community compared to decades ago, but despite these differences, it is still possible to enjoy a vibrant and satisfying sex life during our golden years. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 13
When is a Medicare “Supplement” NOT a Supplement? Have you ever needed a facial tissue and asked for a “Kleenex”? While a Kleenex is a facial tissue, not all facial tissues are Kleenex. Talking about Medicare can be like that sometimes. Let me explain… By Melinda A. Moros 14 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
When my phone rings, a lot of times the caller will start with something like, “I’d like to get a Medicare Supplemental plan…”. That’s when I have to ask a lot of questions and go into “Medicare 101”. Like the tissue example, there are many plans which can provide supplemental benefits to Medicare, but not all of them are Medicare Supplements. Being a government-sponsored medical program, Medicare has a lot of jargon and precise terminology for many aspects of this program. I’ll explain some of the basics in this article. We will not address “retiree” group plans in this article (those are plans offered by employers or unions and are customized for each group), nor will we discuss
integration of Medicare benefits with MediCal (Medicaid benefits in California). Everyone starts with Original Medicare. It consists of two “parts” – Part A for hospital benefits and Part B for medical benefits. However, there is cost sharing in the form of premiums, deductibles, and coinsurance, which can be quite costly. That’s why private insurance companies have partnered with Medicare to provide insurance plans to “supplement” Medicare benefits. Generally, you must have BOTH Parts A and B to qualify for any of the plans discussed below. There are three basic types of plans provided by private insurance companies which you can purchase to enhance your Medicare
benefits. These are Medicare Supplements (also called “Medigap” plans), Medicare Advantage (MA) plans, and Medicare Prescription Drug (PDP) plans. All are regulated at the federal and state level. Many people frequently use the term “Medicare Supplement” to refer to both Medicare Supplements and Medicare Advantage plans, but they are very different from one another, and a licensed agent may not refer to them in that manner. So if you decide to purchase a plan to enhance your Medicare benefits, you have two choices after you become eligible for Medicare Parts A and B: You can purchase a Medicare Supplement and, if desired, a PDP to cover your medications. OR you can purchase a Medicare Advantage Plan which may or may not include prescription drug coverage and a PDP if it does NOT include prescription coverage. You canNOT have both a Medicare Supplement AND a Medicare Advantage plan at the same time – Medicare prohibits it. Medicare Supplements cover ONLY hospital and medical services. They do NOT cover outpatient prescription drug benefits*. That’s why you’ll need a PDP in addition to your Medicare Supplement to provide comprehensive coverage. With a Medicare Supplement, you rely on Original Medicare Parts A and B as your primary payer. That means that Medicare will pay for your hospital and medical services first before any other insurance. To enhance your benefits, you can purchase one of several Medicare Supplements to “supplement” Medicare by filling in the gaps in your coverage. A Medicare Supplement will pay some or all of your deductibles and coinsurance, depending on which plan you purchase. The benefits covered under the Medicare Supplement follow the benefits covered under Medicare. So, if Medicare covers a medical service, the Medicare Supplement will also cover that service (to the limits of that policy). If Medicare denies that service, so will the Medicare Supplement … they have the same benefit “footprint”. One of the most appealing features of these Medigap plans is that you can get services from ANY provider ANYWHERE in the U.S. that accepts Medicare. No referrals are needed, and your coverage travels with you within the U.S.
The downside of Medicare Supplements is that they tend to have higher premiums than Medicare Advantage plans, but that is not always the case. You need to add in the cost of a separate PDP for a fair comparison. Medicare Advantage plans cover your medical benefits in a different way. They bundle together your hospital, medical, and, in many cases, outpatient prescription drug benefits into one plan. By enrolling in a MA plan you agree to receive your Medicare benefits directly from the insurance company, not Original Medicare. That means that although you remain a Medicare beneficiary, you cannot use your Original Medicare card for benefits while you are enrolled in a MA plan. If your MA plan does not include prescription drug coverage, you can purchase a separate standalone PDP. In many cases, MA plans also provide additional benefits not normally covered by Medicare, such as vision, hearing, and dental benefits. Here in the East Bay, all MA plans are HMOs, so you will have network restrictions, and you will likely need to have referrals to see specialists. MA plans tend to have lower premiums than Medicare Supplements, and they usually have specific copayments (a specific $ amount) or coinsurance (a % amount). You MUST have Part B and continue to pay your Part B premium (unless you qualify for financial aid) in addition to any premium required by the MA plan. So which is better, a Medicare Supplement or a Medicare Advantage plan? I get this question a lot. And the answer is… it depends. There are many factors to consider, including your general health, your affordability level, whether or not your doctors are in the network, and your comfort level with each type of plan. That’s why it’s important to work with a licensed and certified agent familiar with the plans available in your area. Your agent can help you determine which plan may be right for you! To your health, Melinda 925-246-5231 Melinda@MelindaMoros.com Ever wonder if there was anyone who could help you make sense of your Medicare options..? There is … Me! * There are some old Medicare Supplement plans which do bundle medical benefits with Rx benefits. These plans are no longer open to new enrollment and are increasingly rare. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 15
Women and Orgasms By Betty Elder
16 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Women and Orgasms, is she faking it or is it for real? Can a man really tell? As much as they think they can the majority of them cannot? The reason I say this is because for a woman faking it is much too easy and most men are happy if they just think they made them cum. If women were not faking it there would be no reason to write this article.
O
ne-way to tell is if she really had, an orgasm is how long it takes her. Now some women do come quickly but in my research the majority of women take longer than 2 minutes so if your woman is screaming two minutes into sex ask yourself is she screaming because she is Cuming or because she cannot wait for it to be over? Let me help you men out while I am on this subject. I have talked to a lot of woman and men about sex; and I have talked to so many couples that do not know how to talk about sex. They don’t how to tell one another what feels good to them instead they settle for unsatisfying sex and fake it so their man feels good not knowing that the vast majority of men really do want to satisfy their women. When women fake it, they are not only cheating themselves but they are also setting the standard for what they will continue to get from their man. All he can go by is what you make them think. If you are not reaching an orgasm and you fake
it they are just going to continue doing what you have made them think works. It is not the man’s faults if you let them believe you are satisfied and you are not then it is the women’s fault for pretending that they are. There are far too many women who do not know what it would take for them to reach an orgasm if you do not know what feels good then how can you tell a man what you want them to do. The first thing women have to do is stop being afraid to touch themselves, yes I said touch yourselves. I realize many women have been raised to think that it is a sin or that it is dirty to touch yourself if that is the case then bring on the dirt. Unless you know what feels good to you and what it takes to reach an orgasm you will always be left frustrated and faking it. Women I think actually talk more about sex then men do rather the sex is good or bad and a lot of what they are saying is about how men are getting there’s before they do. They say things like “he needed a road map to find his way to the right spot”. Or “he came right when I was ready to.” When your woman says, “don’t stop” that is exactly what she means. However, until women are willing to tell their man what they need to be pleased they will always come up short. Both of you should share and talk about reaching an orgasm and there are ways to make sure both of you are satisfied. There are a lot of different things you can do to enhance sex such as lubricants which help when a woman does not become wet it’s
not that she isn’t turned on it’s just that some women are drier than others that is when you should have a lubricant on hand. One of my favorites is K-Y Warming Gel but there are several lubricants out there to choose from, it enhances the feeling and can help you reach an orgasm. Dry sex is not comfortable for either the man or the woman. You never want to use Vaseline; it is not good for women to use because it is not water-soluble. Because some women take longer than others to reach an orgasm they probably just need that constant stimulation without interruptions. There are several sexual toys on the market today that can make a man’s job easier. Vibrators come in all shapes and sizes they have battery operated ones or ones you plug in. It gives steady stimulation to the clitoris and helps women reach their orgasm. Vibrators can really help you men when you don’t know what to do the only problem is that to many men feel intimidated when a woman pulls out her toy, a toy isn’t there to replace you instead it’s there to enhance the experience for both of you. So next time a women pulls out her butterfly, or any type of toy enjoy it with her and watch your sex life come alive because both of you are enjoying it. Please feel free to email me with any of your questions to enhance your sex life is my ultimate goal anything I can bring to the table I am happy to share. Next week we will discuss “Foreplay” and how important it is.
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 17
Support 18 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Whether arriving through courage or feelings of despair, I am always so moved, so touched, so impressed, and so careful when people come in to my office with even a slight willingness to re-examine how they are living their lives. By Aaron J. Feldman, LMFT
M
en are especially conditioned by each other and by women to keep their emotional lives contained, making it particularly challenging to question themselves and to ask for help. However, professional counseling and psychotherapy is an appropriate and safe avenue for self-improvement and for coping with life’s problems. Men and women come to the Center for Personal & Relational Development with a wide range of issues including sexual problems in their intimate relationships. A common complaint is a sex life that has gotten stale or dropped off. Couples often come to us feeling disconnected from each other. The strain of raising children, pressures at work, unemployment, illness or death of parents or other loved ones, unspoken resentments or unresolved tension in the relationship, depression, drinking and drug use, physical changes, and even seemingly innocuous changes in schedules can derail the exuberant sexual flow and habits that may once have been integral to your relationship. Revitalizing your sex life might require medical intervention, and it may also be as simple as putting sex back on the calendar. However, for many couples, searching for and addressing the cause compassionately and honestly with the support of a trained professional is a helpful if not vital way to reconnect. In so doing, we see many couples actually become closer than they
were in the beginning of their relationship. The fanfare of hopes, ideas, and fantasies is replaced by the symphony of history, substance, depth, and knowing. Bob and JoAnne (these are not their real names) came to us because their relationship had gone adrift. They “suddenly” found themselves in crisis. Not only had they stopped having sex, Bob was spending all of his spare time out in the shed working on various projects or in the den watching sports while JoAnne had found Facebook. The crisis surfaced when Bob discovered that JoAnne was having an emotional affair with an old boyfriend from college days through Facebook. In working with Bob and JoAnne, it became clear that the problem was not her old boyfriend or even her infidelity. The culprit was the giant physical and emotional chasm that Bob and JoAnne had both allowed to form between them. Depending on how you look at it, neither or both of them were to blame for where they found themselves. Once JoAnne agreed to end her relationship with Rick in collaboration with Bob’s commitment to spend more time with JoAnne, the uncomfortable but essential work of reconnecting Bob and JoAnne could begin. What we learned was that eight years ago, Bob’s erections had become less reliable. Around the same time, their daughter was injured in a car accident and going through numerous surgeries as a result. We honed in on one night during that time period when the
emotional level and had no opportunity to be expressed. It was this unvoiced and largely-unconscious hurt in combination with their shared preoccupation and concern about Kate during that time period that they encountered an almost imperceptible fork in the road. Through professional couples therapy, Bob was able to see how he had taken something personally that had nothing to do with JoAnne’s feelings for or about him. He was also able to identify that it was his own anxiety about their daughter – feeling guilty about having pleasure while Kate was suffering that inhibited his sexual functioning. Significantly, they both saw the relationally fatal consequence of failing to communicate about what they were thinking and feeling. Before the crisis, they had no protocol for paying attention to their own feelings about their relationship, much less a regular time set aside to discuss and to process them together. A lot of water went under the bridge, and with time, their bodies and virility were changing naturally, but sex became about more than performance and orgasms. Through hearing and talking through each others experiences of feeling, through the gesture of their shared effort, through learning to appreciate different sensations, sex evolved into a far more breadthfull pleasure of personal connection. To renew a sexual life is to disentangle misunderstandings, resentments, and expectations from the past and to discover what is possible
Couples often come to us feeling disconnected from each other. phone rang while Bob was having difficulty “performing.” JoAnne jumped out of bed, concerned that it was something to do with their daughter, Kate. When JoAnne came back to bed a few minutes later, she was overwhelmed with thoughts of their daughter and ended up unable to sleep. She decided to go into another room to read and eventually fell asleep in the other room. Bob interpreted JoAnne’s inability to resume their intimacy that night as a lack of interest, concern and an expression of her impatience and disappointment in him. Of course, Bob was extremely concerned about Kate and understood JoAnne’s concern rationally, but his sexual struggle loomed heavily in him on an
and what – and who is present now. Aaron J. Feldman, is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Walnut Creek, and he is the founder and director of the Center for Personal & Relational Development (CPRD), a non-profit 501(c)3 organization that offers sliding-scale fee counseling and psychotherapy throughout the Bay Area, including Alameda County. Each therapist at CPRD provides unique perspective and experience in helping people to find their way and to fulfill their personal and relationship potential. For further information, feel free to contact Mr. Feldman via email at ajf@cprd.us or voicemail: 1-888-217-2773 x3. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 19
F What is Your
Plan for Living? By Pat Baxter
20 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
rom the time we become “so-called” responsible adults which is usually associated with some form of rites of passage – marriage, having a child or finally making it (based on our careers), we have adhered to instructions to prepare us for our demise – dying. We make sure our plans are solid as a rock by purchasing adequate life insurance, making sure we have established a final will and testament (wrapped and insulated with a trust), purchase cemetery plots or pay for cremation costs and we even prepare DNR (ABSOLUTELY! do not resuscitate) agreements. You are probably like many of your comrades – well prepared for the “grim reaper”. What happens if the “grim reaper” forgets about you and leaves you hanging around longer than you or statistics expected. Yeah, what exactly is your plan for living a long life? Recently I was driving and saw a billboard on the highway which featured a child and a caption that stated, “Based on Statistics this child will live to be 105”. Even life insurance companies have adjusted their plans based on actuarial data and now extend coverage to age 121. Are you ready for that – Living to 121? Since it appears baby boomers are well prepared for dying, the assumption has been made that dying is their greatest fear. Based on recent research this is a false assumption. When asked about their greatest fears baby boomers list living too long at the top of the list. Boomers are concerned about becoming a burden to family and friends due to declining health and they are concerned about running out of money. They associate running out of money to poor retirement planning and the need to cover unpredictable healthcare costs. Both of these risks are directly associated with living too long. Truly these are real risks that must be addressed and planned for with the same sense of urgency applied to planning for dying.
Risk 1: Running Out of Money This is a real risk associated with living longer based on the following facts: Many boomers have been forced to take earlier than planned retirements. Boomers are being forced out of the market left and right and if market re-entry occurs, it usually involves less income. Thus, boomers are tapping into
Finance
their retirement “nest eggs” earlier than they planned. Boomers have experienced two major market down-swings (2000-2002 and 2008). In 2008 the market took a 38.5% down-swing. Imagine having to tap into your nest egg during a down market. For many boomers this is exactly what happened – with the market down and the economy at a historically low growth rate, many lost jobs during these periods and had no choice but to start liquidating retirement plans. Thus, market volatility is a real concern in terms of the risk of running out of money during retirement years. How does one predict inflation and would a period of rapid inflation eat away at your nest egg? With the rapid cost increases associated with gas and food, it’s alarming these two cost indicators are not used to determine the core U.S. inflation rate. Two measures of inflation are often reported: core consumer price index (CPI), which does not include food and energy cost, and non-core CPI, which includes everything. Core CPI is important because this is what the Federal Reserve looks at to decide whether or not to raise the Fed funds rate. The Feds uses the core CPI because food, oil and gas prices are so volatile and the Fed's tools are so slow-acting. Therefore, inflation could be high if gas prices have risen, but the Fed won't react until those increases trickle through to the prices of other goods and services. Thus, can we fully depend on the inflation numbers provided by our government economists to determine how we structure our retirement plans? Availability of Social Security benefits is shaky to say the least and defined benefit pension plans are a thing of the past. The percentage of workers covered by a traditional defined benefit (DB) pension plan that pays a lifetime annuity, often based on years of service and final salary, has been steadily declining over the past 25 years. From 1980 through 2008, the proportion of private wage and salary workers participating in DB pension plans fell from 38 percent to 20 percent (Bureau of Labor Statistics 2008; Department of Labor 2002).
Risk 2: Unexpected Health-Related Costs Another real risk associated with living too long is based on these facts:
At least 70% of people over age 65 will need long term care services and support. This is based on today’s experiences. What do you think these number will look like as we continue to live longer? At some point we must realize long term care needs should not be considered “unexpected” and get our heads out of the sand. The need for long term care services and support is a reality that must be incorporated into our plans for living. Medicare and typical health insurance plans do not cover long term care costs. Medicaid (Medi-Cal in California) typically requires individuals to spend-down all of their assets in order for the State to cover the cost of care. This option basically requires you to be poor. Families are continuing to choose to live in far proximity from one another. Thus, having the opportunity to designate a family member as your caregiver becomes increasingly unlikely. In addition, most boomers state they don’t want to depend on family and friends. Independence is very important to boomers. Boomers represent a very large group and they have grown accustom to competing for everything from nursery school spots to access to social security benefits. This has created a high level of independence among this group. Also, boomers have focused on making sure their offspring are well-educated with the hopes their offspring will have access to lucrative careers. Thus, most boomers’ plans don’t require their children leave their lucrative careers to become their personal caregivers. As Walter M. Bortz II, M.D. points out in his book “We Live Too Short and Die Too Long”, it’s natural to live to 100 plus and many of us will. Knowing this, we may consider reversing the title of Dr. Bortz’s book and stop planning so much for dying and start planning to live long and productive lives. While planning to live, be sure you will not have to depend upon family and friends
to take care of you during your need for long term care and you will not have to liquidate your retirement fund to cover for the cost of care. Remember, needing long term care doesn’t necessarily mean you are dying. The average time people require long term care services is 2.8 years. If the care needed is based on something like Alzheimer’s or Parkinson disease, this will increase the time needed for care tremendously. Many Alzheimer’s patients live with this disease for 7-12 years. Can your nest egg handle funding this type of long term care need with the annual median rate for private room in a nursing home being $83,950 (based on the 2013 Cost of Care Survey reported by Genworth Financial)? Determine how your long term care will be provided and paid for. Will your family take care of you? Will you be poor enough for the government to take care of you? Will you cover the cost out-of-pocket (be sure to have approximately $600,000 earmarked)? Will you transfer this risk to an insurance company by purchasing long term care insurance? Also while planning to live, make sure you will not run out of income during your golden retirement years. Most retirees face the conundrum of how to spend-down assets without completely depleting them. One strategy is to annually withdraw 4% of your initial retirement balance and adjust the dollar amount annually to keep pace with inflation. This can become very difficult in a volatile market. Another option is to spend only the interest and dividends of your portfolio. Leaving the principal untouched may support a desire to leave money to heirs, but it could put a crimp in your lifestyle. Another option would be to create an annuity which pays you a predictable and guaranteed income for life – very similar to defined pension plans. Living a long life can be joyous and productive with the right type of planning. Plan today and keep on living!
Pat Baxter is the owner of REAP Legacy, Inc. and since 2002 has provided retirement planning and asset protection solutions for individuals and small-mid size companies. She is also a long term care specialist and certified with the California Partnership for Long Term Care. Available for speaking engagements and workshop presentations. REAP Legacy, Inc. (510) 409-0086
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 21
Prevent Family Drama, Plan for the Inevitable
22 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Time and time again when a family member dies (usually the matriarch or patriarch of the family), drama among family members erupts over the assets left behind. Often the matter ends up in court with family members pitted against each other, each side hiring a team of lawyers. By Endy Ukoha-Ajike, Esq 1 Sometimes there is a will or no will, which in either case guarantees that there will be probate . Sometimes there is a trust which should avoid probate, but if poorly drafted, the parties still end up in court. The aim of this article is to provide information that will propel you to act and prevent family drama that can erupt when dividing a loved one’s assets.
Encourage Your Matriarch or Patriarch to Plan for the Inevitable While it may look suspicious to others when a family member (son or daughter), encourages their mother or father to execute a will or trust, it is better to do so than not. Even though parents often don’t want to broach the topic of planning for what happens at their deaths, it is more prudent for a child or children to encourage the parents to do so while not becoming directly involved in the process. Planning prevents speculation at death regarding the intent of the deceased about their assets. Here are some dos and don’ts for children: a. Do: research and help find an Estate Planning Attorney ; Do: schedule the meeting if your parents authorize you to do so; Do not: attend the meeting, or if you escort your parent/s, do not sit in the meeting with your parents/ and the attorney; Do not: pay the attorney’s fees for creating your parent/s estate plan from your funds; Do not: get involved in deciding who receives assets in your parent/s’ estate plan. It is their plan, not yours. By involving yourself too much, you run the risk of allegations of undue influence. Attending a meeting, financing an estate plan, or helping divide assets may result in a challenge or contest when your parent passes away.
ing devices such as smart phones, video and voice recorders. Even if contested, it is more difficult for a court to ignore a visual/audio recording of a healthy person clearly reciting his/her wishes at death, than to accept the clever arguments of a lawyer who is trying to overturn those wishes as untrue. It helps avoid allegations of duress or undue influence.
Conclusion been admitted to the hospital before putting a plan in place. The will or trust often ends up being challenged or contested. Instead plan while you are still healthy and in control. While healthy, you are able to think clearly and deeply about who you will appoint to take control of your assets, and how your loved ones will receive those assets. These are not decisions you can make easily while under the pressure of serious illness. A plan written at the hospital may still be valid, but it is more likely to be contested than one that is written with careful and deliberate consideration.
After making the plan, record it Over the last few years in my practice, I have encouraged my clients to record their testamentary wishes, especially with the prevalence of new technology and small record-
Remember the old adage, those who fail to plan, plan to fail. Don’t let your failure to plan for the enjoyment of a tax fee inheritance by your loved ones lead to protracted, costly and unnecessary litigation that may ultimately tear up the family. Be proactive!! 1 Endy Ukoha-Ajike is an Oakland based attorney whose practice areas are Tax, Estate Planning, & Business Consulting: www.ukohalaw. com 70 Washington St @ JLS, Suite 303, Oakland, CA 94607. Tel: 510-834-9944 1 Probate is the court supervised process of following a deceased person’s wishes in determining who inherits their assets. In California a deceased person’s assets must pass through probate whether they had a will or not, if the value of those assets is $150,000 or more. 1 Find an attorney whose primary practice area is Estate Planning, not just those who advertise: We do “Wills and Trusts”, or “Document Preparers.”
Put a plan in place while you are able Do not wait until you or your loved one has suffered or is suffering from a fatal illness and have RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 23
Entertainment
Lionel
Brockman Richie
By Vivian Stone
Renew Life magazine is dedicating this issue to the topic of “Love of Family”. I have a special friend of 36 years whose life illustrates how much our lives are filled and shaped by Love of Family. He has gone through the same ups and downs as the rest of us regardless of his fame and fortune. You know him as Lionel Richie, the lead singer of “The Commodores” and the mega-superstar solo artist he became in the 80’s. 24 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Lionel Brockman Richie, Jr. was born June 20, 1949 (age 64) in Tuskegee, Alabama as the eldest child of Lynol Brockman Richie Sr., an Army Captain and Alberta R. (Foster) Richie, an English teacher. He is very close to his only sibling, younger sister Deborah, who like her mother, has dedicated her life to education. Lionel was shaped by the birthplace and home he grew up in alongside his maternal grandmother, Adelaide (Towson) Foster, a classical pianist, who lived to be 103. He was born and lived in a small, predominantly African American community in the original home of Booker T. Washington situated on the campus of what is now considered Tuskegee University and “The Tuskegee Institute”, home of the famous “Tuskegee Airmen”, the first African American combat pilots in the United States Army Air Corps, who fought in World War II. Lionel’s grandmother served as
choir director at the University so Lionel spent much of his childhood on campus. He was raised in a strict, religious, middle-class family and had early ambitions of becoming a priest. He also had a fondness for music, playing the saxophone and piano. His musical roots came not only from his grandmother Adelaide, but also from an uncle who was a big band player and musical arranger for "Duke" Ellington. He gave Lionel his first saxophone. Lionel's grandmother ensured that he practiced piano daily and attended all of Tuskegee's musical events. Lionel graduated High School as a star tennis player and returned to Tuskegee Institute on tennis scholarship where he graduated with an Economics degree. In 1968, Lionel, defying his parents, joined his college classmates in the musical group, The Commodores. The Commodores landed a recording contract with Motown Records in 1971. Richie married his college sweetheart, Brenda Harvey in October 1975. In 1982, Lionel decided to pursue a solo career and in 1983, he and wife Brenda became guardians of Nicole Camille Escovedo, the two-year-old daughter of one of the members of Lionel's band. They raised Nicole as their daughter and legally adopted her at the age of nine. The event that sent his solo career into the stratosphere was the night he performed his song "All Night Long" at the closing ceremony of the 1984 Olympic Games. Later that same year, Richie co-wrote with Michael Jackson pop’s most famous anthem; “We Are The World”. Richie became one of the most successful artists of the 1980’s, earning nine #1 singles and 13 top ten hits between 1981 and 1987. By 1987, Richie was exhausted from a grueling work schedule. With two world tours under his belt he had all the fame and fortune he could have ever dreamed of and yet…it came at the expense of his family. He had a very public confrontation with his wife of 17 years after which they separated. As many of us in the baby boomer generation have experienced, Lionel was caught between two generations. Having to raise a young child, creating a new home for himself, staying relevant in his work life and caring for a sick parent. Richie took three years off to rebuild his life and to take care of family including shuttling back and forth to Tuskegee to care for his ill father. Sadly, Lynol Sr, died in 1990 at age 77. Heartbroken after his father’s
death, he threw himself into the recording studio and released his first greatest-hits collection titled; “Back to Front”, in 1992. At age 45, Richie married second wife, Diane Alexander in December 1995. That union brought forth two children, Miles Brockman (18), born in May 1994 and Sofia (15), born in August 1998. Alongside the happiness of a new wife and the birth of his children, Richie rode the emotional roller coaster of loss during the 14 year period between 1990 and 2004. Richie’s beloved grandmother died November 30, 1996, his mother died in 2001 and he went through another divorce in 2004 from second wife, Diane. Like so many in our age group, in 2004, at age 54, he had to renew his life’s possibilities,
rebuild his life, rebuild his brand and decide what else he wanted to do in this next chapter of his life. During the last 10 years he became a staunch breast cancer activist in honor of his beloved grandmother who suffered breast cancer in her 80’s and raised more than $4 million towards that effort. He repaired his relationships with both ex-wives, became a grandfather in 2008, released his tenth studio album, “Tuskegee” which returned him to the top of the Billboard 200 chart in 2012 and was his first number one album there in more than 25 years! In October 2013, at age 64, Richie launched his first world tour in over a decade and has been selling out shows at every stop along the tour. The tour continues through 2014 in Asia, Australia, Africa, the UK, Europe, Malaysia and Saudi Arabia. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 25
Egg-Scuse Me! A Half Dozen Restaurants That Break Breakfast Eggs Exquisitely
By Melody Fuller
Of course Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. How else would one justify Bottomless Mimosa at District Oakland, Bloody Mary with bacon served exclusively at Oakland Chop Bar, and Shakin’ Jesse, a Guinness stout blended breakfast shake made at Rudy’s Can’t Fail Cafe? These signature and classic libations cause uncontainable thirst before you get around to ordering your eggs. 26 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
P
rayer Breakfast, Bed & Breakfast, Breakfast in bed, Continental Breakfast, full, healthy, or fine breakfast, Brunch, English Breakfast, and French Breakfast. Every country has its own unique style of breakfast. All of these breakfasts raise your sleeping spirits; make you feel good, special, loved, pampered, and full! Here in the Bay Area, there is something extra amazing about our breakfast options. We excel at it, we perfect it, we meet over it, we stand in long lines for it, we sit for hours at it, and we like to read about it. In Oakland we are blessed with an em-
barrassment of breakfast riches. We have The Merritt Restaurant & Bakery, Aunt Mary’s, Boot & Shoe Service, Cafe 15, Grand Lake Kitchen, Portal, Flora, Mama’s Royal Cafe, Full House Cafe, Bocanova, Lyn and Lu’s Escapade Cafe, Montclair Egg Shop, Lakeshore Cafe, Cana, Bellancino, Dona Tomas... I could go on for pages. Now before your eyes get too big and you fault me, or worse, for not naming one of your favorites, I concede that this short list is nowhere near complete and a restaurant that serves breakfast in Oakland not being mentioned here is in no way an indictment of that restaurant. Having said that, I am being generous—quite generous, to some restaurants named. If space permitted, I would highlight many more tasty breakfast options in Alameda County, especially in Berkeley, Albany, Emeryville, San Leandro, Alameda, etc. We also have the gift of eggs. Certain restaurants shine whether they fry, boil, poach, scramble, or deliver our breakfast eggs overeasy. It matters not if the egg is deviled, white, raw, sunny-side up, runny, medium, hard, baked, or soft. We can order an omelet, a benedict, huevos, frittata, tortilla, migas, chiaquiles, or quiche. The egg is delicious! Be it a chicken or a duck egg, our eggs are luscious. Fresh, jumbo, extra large, large, medium, small or pee wee-sized — yummy! We enjoy our grade A, AA, or B eggs. Our eggs can be cage, cage-free, free-range, organic, vegetarian, enriched, and specialty type eggs like omega-three fatty acid and other nutrient-added eggs. They are tasty to us. Now, if you will excuse me, and without further delay, or adieu, I will present my half dozen, no “egg-scuse” restaurants, where breakfast eggs are broken exquisitely!
“Excuse me, what is the dish that you are having?” She replied, “I am having the organic cheese grits with poached eggs.” Let down because I did not like or care to like anything *organic.* I said, “Oh.” “Don’t let the organic scare you.” She challenged as if she could read my mind. “I just want something that taste good. You know? I want delicious and filling. I don’t think organic will do that.” That was my response. I did not try the dish that day. The next time I came in, which was about a week later, I did. That was probably 6 years ago. Today I order the organic cheddar cheese grits and poached eggs every time I eat at Brown Sugar Kitchen. Hopscotch Has an eclectic brunch menu that features one of my favorite eggs: Jidori. This creamy and rich flavored, dark and intense orange- colored egg yolk has Japanese origins. Several top chefs procure the American version of this egg. The exceptional egg dish that I order at Hopscotch is the Soy Braised Pork Belly Benedict featuring Jidori eggs and miso hollandaise. The composition of this dish is flawless. Cock-a-Doodle Cafe Makes a magical French toast where the egg does not dominate the bread. It seems the way to get your French toast and your egg to get along is to encrust the bread in graham crackers giving you a tremendous dish: Gra-
ham Cracker-Crusted French Toast. Several pieces of fresh, crispy fried chicken come with this winning version of French toast. Add the homemade banana-rum sauce and order a cocktail and you will see what enchantment feels like. District Is the go-to spot for Sunday Brunch. In addition to the aforementioned bottomless mimosas, the bottomless brunch features creamy scrambled eggs with cheese. Be sure and wear your Sunday best. Besides the filling eggs and braised collard greens, the fashionistas flock to District for brunch. Soul’s Restaurant Is the salt of the earth when it comes to their large three-egg omelet choices. To make this a classic southern breakfast, order the catfish. The marriage of the two dishes is long lasting and enjoyable! The gospel music playing softly in the background is a soothing bonus. Rick & Ann’s Restaurant Devotes space on their menu to tell you how they prepare their eggs: Our eggs are served in a soft, custard style. I have enjoyed their eggs for most of my life. I request additional green onions and all is good. Another custom for me is to order a short stack of the Potato-Cheese Pancakes. These are possibly the best in the bay area. Enjoy!
Brown Sugar Kitchen While infamous for its waffle and chicken, makes one of my most favourite indulgences involving perfectly poached eggs: Organic cheddar cheese grits with two poached eggs. I discovered this dish by accident. I saw a young lady, impeccably dressed, dining alone like me, and she was gracefully sliding spoonful after spoonful into her mouth without stopping. I spied what looked like my Dad’s delicious Cream of Wheat where he would put a perfect size pat of butter in the middle to melt before he served it to us kids. I was careful not to interrupt her until her spoon touched the bottom of her cleaned plate. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 27
Backyard Bubbles! By Melody Fuller
28 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
A
My mother, a successful business woman and a long-time resident of Oakland, knew that champagne was meant for special occasions. When she broke ground on a new boutique, she poured bubbles. When we celebrated birthdays, weddings, or anniversaries we held champagne glasses in our hands, raised them high above our heads, and we cheerfully toasted our special milestones.
s I grew older my mom supported my belief that Fridays were special occasions—the end of a work week which, in my book, also called for a thankful celebration. Another successful business woman, who lives not too far from us, believes that residents of Alameda County—Oakland, etc., will create unforgettable memories, have lots of fun, and feel quite comfortable sipping Champagne, while seated on the front porch of her classic 18th century French chateau-style winery, which is also a Carneros Region landmark. Eileen Crane, the Wine Maker and Chief Executive Officer for Domaine Carneros by Tattinger in Napa, also believes we should enjoy Champagne every day, and we should not save our bubbles just for special occasions. When I sat down with Eileen, she also shared that sometimes she enjoys her Champagne in an Old Fashioned glass, thus further enforcing her certainty that there really are no rules around wine. Eileen’s open mind and inclusive style are reflected in the warm welcome and gracious hospitality of the Domaine Carneros team. When you journey further north from this chateau, and deeper into our Napa Valley backyard, additional exciting Sparkling Wine tasting options are close by. You have majestic Champagnes from Schramsberg Winery and Caves, iconic Champagnes from Mumm Napa, and historic champagnes from Domaine Chandon. Each Champagne house offers you something very different from which your own memories will be made. Before we proceed with your Champagne focused expedition, it needs to be noted that Sparkling Wine should be called Champagne only if it produced, or comes from the region of Champagne, France. Yet, several Napa Valley bottles will have Champagne on the label. To further clarify, French Sparkling Wines produced outside of Champagne are referred to as Cremant. Other countries have special regional sparkling wines such as Spain's Cava, Germany’s Sekt, and Italy's Prosecco and Asti. Sparkling Wine and Champagne are essentially the same drink held under pressure, in a bottle, by a foil capsule, a wire closure, and a secured cork that goes “Pop!” when you open it. Some prefer a more restrained opening of their Champagne, whereby a barely audible slow fizz sound is heard as the cork is freed from the bottle.
Let’s get back on the road. From Domaine Carneros, we take a beautiful drive past countless wineries to Schramsberg Vineyard, America’s House of Sparkling Wine, located in Calistoga. Schramsberg, a lovely estate and registered historical landmark, also showcases Napa Valley’s oldest Champagne caves. Here, the voyage to the glass happens while you tour the caves and obtain knowledge about how Schramsberg produces their outstanding Champagne. It should be noted that there are three ways to make Champagne: methode champenoise, transfer method, and the charmat bulk process. On your journey to the Champagne glass, and through your tasting options, you will learn what these methods are and if that matters to you. After your time at Schramsberg, we head over to Mumm Napa located in Rutherford. Mumm Napa comes from the three centuries old French originated G. H. Mumm, in Champagne, France. Mumm embraces the classic handcrafted technique of winemaking invented in Champagne. Tasting Champagne via flights is my suggestion. The personal table service is outstanding. Their hospitality is as attentive as that given when I visited the House of Mumm in France last summer! Your education about the Champagne is as you wish—when you wish. The Oak Terrace seating facing the vineyards is exactly as a tasting should be: transformative. You have several tasting options while visiting Mumm Napa. Your Napa Valley Champagne expedition concludes in Yountville at Domaine Chandon. In our own backyard, your Domaine Chandon Champagne tasting options are abundant. I suggest you request a private tasting, one removed from the sizeable crowds and noise. Moët & Chandon and Hennessy are the origins and force behind this sparkling wine. Dom Pérignon, an influential winemaker for whom Moët & Chandon named a Champagne in his honor, is rumored to have said after his first taste of Champagne: “Come quickly, I am tasting stars.” My visit to The House of Moët in France is one I will never forget. The Champagnes poured were exquisite and the private sipping and savoring of a glass of Dom Pérignon Cuvee, while seated in the room where he worked, was unmatched. Domaine Chandon is noted as the first French-owned sparkling wine venture in the United States, thus creating a near-by option for us to enjoy even more bubbles in our backyard. Cheers! RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 29
The postcard from Paris was included in the mail that was delivered on my birthday, a reminder of springtime in Paris. I flipped it over and read the message, “Happy Birthday, Sam”, short and sweet.
I
By Diana L. Bell
Romantic revivals Destination Decisions:
30 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
smiled knowing that the unstated message meant more, much more. It said: “I always remember your birthday. I remember that you love to travel and that Paris is one of your favorite destinations. I wish that we had come here together”. I sighed wishing that we had too. We would have held hands as we explored the city, visiting The Eiffel Tower and The Arc de Triomphe. We would then stroll along the tree-lined Champs-Elysees, pause for a coffee and then press on toward the Cathedral of Notre Dame. He would have pulled me close to steal a kiss in the Louvre under the watchful eye of Mona Lisa. And then he’d whisper in my ear “Let’s give her something to smile about”. I would laugh through his kisses, oblivious to the other tourists milling about. What a lovely birthday gift, that Paris postcard! Though our complicated relationship had not survived and we hadn’t spoken for a long time, I understood that the romance that we shared lived on. It just needed the trigger of that postcard to revive the memories. And, for some romances, memories are enough. But, what are the odds of a postcard making it through both France’s La Poste and the US Postal Service to arrive in California on exactly the right day? Was this a sign that our romance was worth reviving? Paris, the City of Lights, offers many possibilities for romantic revivals, especially in the springtime. The sounds, the sights, the
smells, bombard your senses making you want more; Yes, another glass of Champagne – I love the taste; yes, let’s go back to Versailles on Sunday when the fountains are flowing – I love the sound, the sprinkle of water on my face; yes, one more stop stolen moment – I love the touch. He would indulge me in a shopping trip to the Galeries Lafayette and actually enjoy himself.( Beyond the great shopping, the magnificence of the building is a sight to behold, especially the dome and the balconies.) And, I would surprise him with some chocolates that we would shamelessly devour. At dusk, we would head to the nearest Metro station in agreement that Ricki Stevenson’s Black Paris Tour would be our focal point for the next morning. After such a full day, we would relax aboard a Bateaux-Mouches dinner cruise along the Seine River. Losing ourselves in the dazzle of the city lights, we would snuggle close, sip our wine and feel the contentment of being together in this spe-
cial place. This would be one of the many tender moments that we would have shared if we had come to Paris together. If only we had …
In a lovely face, feeling we try to chase Memories that won’t erase, stay forever new We have a magic box in which is never locked
I thirst but never quench I know the consequence, feeling as I do We’re in a spinning top Where, tell me, will it stop And what am I to say Open our music book, that only few can look And I’ ll write a song for you
I'll Write a Song for You by Al McKay, Philip Bailey & Steve Beckmeier
Love is a symphony, hearts in one melody ’cause I write a song for you Sounds never dissipate, they only recreate In another place There in your silent night Joy of a song’s delight I write a song for you You write a song for me We write a song for love My magical mystique, finding it all complete
This Earth, Wind and Fire song, “I’ll Write a Song For You”, is playing in my head. While I am a fan of The Elements’ full body of work, I really resonate with the sweet music and lyrics of this particular song. It touches my heart and my soul. Just think, if sounds live on forever and ever, moving from one place and time to another, so too can a tender moment or a loving embrace or a romantic interlude. They never dissipate. Never. Jamais. What a pretty thought! Sounds are transformed by musical instruments and lyrics into songs. Songs can stimulate ideas, memories and emotions. And a postcard can revive a romance. C’est possible. C’est tout!
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NEVER OR WHATEVER Have you ever said never then changed it to whatever? Well whatever you say, don’t you feel strange when you do it anyway? We always want things to go our way. Life is already full of surprises. So why don’t you have a blessed day. We stress so much, make a big fuss, Sometimes we cuss. Get off the stress bus ,get on the gravy train, racking your brain, and make your life plain to enjoy your plain to enjoy once again.
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I’m Cha Cha I’m a poet and I know it By Carlotta Warren-Stringfellow
FAMILY LOVE Love is a Gift from our Abba Father Above When Family Love is given to you what will you do? Keep it to yourself, place it on a shelf? Will you spread you Agape un-conditional love around? Will you put it down never to be found. These questions I pray or not in vain . Please share this love to reign over sorrow. Give lots of love like there is no tomorrow. Respect your family and be kind. Put lots of love in the preparation of comfort food. Let them know you certainly don’t mind. Make a jelly cake, or a chicken made from shake n bake. Pass your legacy on love to prevail, there is so much to tell. You will not regret it, and your family will never forget it.
Health & Wellness
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 33
Literary Profile of
Consumer Central
Consumer Affairs Commission
The purpose of the Alameda County Consumer Affairs Commission (CAC) is to promote and protect the best interests of the consumer public, to encourage the highest standards in the business community and to develop a high level of consumer awareness. By Joseph Larkin The Consumer Affairs Commission (CAC) was created by an order of the Alameda County Board of Supervisors on establishing the CAC, the county seeks to create an environment in which the highest standards of fair and honest
market practices prevail and are enforced, and in which the consumer public is assured the fullest value in products and services. The Consumer Affairs Commission consists of fifteen (15) members, three commissioners from each district and one member at-large selected and appointed by the Alameda County Board of Supervisors. The current commissioners are as follows: Chairman, Joseph Larkin (District 3), Rana Kahlon (District 1); Aziz Akbari (District 1); Cecillia Chang (District 2); Reema Moosa (District 2); Cecilia Cunningham-Charles (District 4); Marlene Hurd (District 5); Ezra Gale (District 5); Sunnie Richordsen (District 5); and Joaquin Murphy (At-Large). The CAC is also assisted by the County of Alameda staff person Elana Poggi from the County Administrators Office. The CAC conducts an annual Consumers Affairs Conference held in Alameda County as well as other free educational workshops conducted throughout the year. The most recent was held on January 25, 2014 at Berkeley Community College, in partnership with the California Public Utilities Commission (CPUC) entitled Safety Fair 2014. The purpose was to provide
residents of Alameda County an opportunity to offer tips on how to stay safe during a crisis and a workshop on scam prevention and personal safety. It also offered the residents the opportunity to voice their concerns and have their questions raised by a panel discussion that consisted of various representatives from local, state and federal government agencies such as the CAC; Food and Drug Administration; U.S. Postal Service; Social Security Administration, Alameda County District Attorney Office and the State of California Bureau of Automotive Repair. In September 2013, we co hosted with County of Alameda District 5 Board Member Keith Carson’s Office a free educational workshop. The subject was Foster Youth & Adult Identity Theft held at the Oakland Housing Authority Headquarters to address the growing issue of identity theft among senior citizens and minors who are wards of the state who have been victims of scammers through their identity theft and credit report fraud. In June 2012, with we co hosted with the County of Alameda District 4 Board Member Nate Miley’s Office a free educational workshop, the subject was Foreclosure Workshop that was designed to share information, tips and resources to help distressed homeowners who were facing foreclosure or who may have received a bad mortgage loan and/or terms. It offered homeowners the opportunity to meet directly with the lenders and counselors who were in attendance, such as the Associated Real Property Brokers (ARPB); Operation Hope; Housing and Urban Development (HUD); California Department of Real Estate; Bank of America; NID Housing Counseling Agency; Chase; California State Bar Association and the Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco. The CAC provides literature to businesses and consumers, and gives educational presentations on consumer issues to community groups. Please visit our website at www.acgov. org/bc/cac to view our calendar for 2014. You may also view our meeting times if you would like an opportunity to speak to the commission during our Public Comment portion of our monthly meetings. We invite you to “get involved” with us. We have vacancies, and welcome all County residents who are interested in helping consumers. If you are interested, please contact the Clerk of the Board's Office at (510) 208-4949. For more information, visit: Clerk of the Board of Supervisors. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 35
Starting the
Conversation By Cynthia Carter Hill
Advanced Care Planning has recently become one of the most talked about subjects in the medical community. Professionals in the fields of advanced illness, palliative care (comfort care), and hospice alike are encouraging you and I to listen, learn and begin the conversation. What are we to talk about you might ask? 36 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
T
he Conversation Project is an initiative that is being launched in the East Bay, Contra Costa County and across the country, dedicated to helping people talk about their wishes for end-of-life care. Oh no, many of you say! I’m healthy, strong, and by the way, we don’t like to discuss end-of-life or death in this our United States of America. What a conversation can do, is provide a shared understanding of what matters most to
Life Style & Home
you and your loved ones. This can certainly make it easier to make decisions when the time comes. 60% of people say that making sure their family is not burdened by tough decisions is extremely important; yet 56% have not communicated their end-of-life wishes. 82% of people say it’s important to put their wishes in writing; 23% have actually done it. (Source: Survey of Californians by the California HealthCare Foundation – 2012) The Conversation Project is dedicated to helping people talk about their wishes for end-of-life care. Too many people are dying in a way they wouldn’t choose, and too many of their loved ones are left feeling bereaved, guilty, and uncertain. It’s time to transform our culture so we shift from not talking about dying to talking about it. It’s time to share the way we want to live at the end of our lives. And it’s time to communicate about the kind of care we want and don’t want for ourselves. We believe that the place for this to begin is at the kitchen table—not in the intensive care unit—with the people we love, before it’s too late. Together we can make these difficult conversations easier. We can make sure that our own wishes and those of our loved ones are expressed and respected. It has been said that some cultures believe you encourage end-of-life when you discuss it openly. My colleagues in the field of health care and awareness will tell you that by not talking about your desire encourages unnecessary pain on those you love. By going the next step and putting those wishes in writing; by using Advanced Health Care Directive (AHCD), FIVE WISHES and the POLST – Physicians Order for Life Sustaining Treatment for the seriously ill, you actually demonstrate responsibility, and the empowering act of self-determination. “Without an opportunity to discuss wishes and concerns, people are likely to hand these often critical care decisions over to clinicians and surrogates who may be poorly equipped to make those decisions.” Says Ellen Goodman – theconversationproject.org. You may say I’m interested in discussing advanced planning; I simply need
60%
of people say that making sure their family is not burdened by tough decisions is extremely important; yet 56% have not communicated their end-of-life wishes.
someone to assist me in understanding my options and how flexible I can be in changing my mind on some of these decisions. If that person is you or your loved one, feel free to contact Cynthia Carter Hill, MPA of VITAS Innovative Hospice Care, Cynthia.Hill@vitas.com or call 510-427-4624. The Conversation Campaign of Alameda County is facilitating conversation starter training sessions Contact Marilyn Ababio- 510-667-7415, Marilyn.ababio@ acgov.org for location and further details. Show your family how much you care by starting the conversation. The key to starting the conversation is – you don’t have to begin it alone. Reach out- we are here to help.
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In 1997, the federal government gave permanent status to a new Medicare/Medicaid benefit called the Program of All-inclusive Care for the Elderly (PACE). There are now over 88 PACE organizations across the United States. Yet, many people have not heard about this comprehensive community-based health plan for frail seniors. By Dianna Garrett
Emphasis is on preventive care
Doctors with PACE programs really get to know their patients.
Center for Elders’ Independence helps seniors continue to live at home 38 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
In the PACE model, all of the financial incentives are lined up for the health plan to provide effective preventive care and manage chronic diseases so they don’t lead to costly, disabling complications. This is because seniors receive all of their medical care and social services from the PACE provider. PACE covers everything from nursing home stays, hospitalization, prescription drugs and rehabilitative therapies to homecare, case management and transportation to and from the PACE clinic/day center or specialist appointments and home. Because PACE providers are responsible for the costs of all care, the focus is on preventive care for each senior, to minimize expensive hospitalizations and nursing home stays.
Each senior gets a whole care team of professionals How does PACE do it? They use a care team approach. Each senior has a personalized care plan, created by the entire pro-
Each senior has a whole team of professionals to help them develop and implement a care plan so they can live at home.
vironment. Helping seniors to live at home in the community for as long as medically and socially possible, instead of having to move to a nursing home, is a primary goal of PACE.
How do I get more information? If you are interested in finding out more about this program for someone you love, you can visit the National PACE Association website at www.pace4you.org. Or you may contact your local PACE provider. The Program for northern Alameda County and West Contra Costa County (Hayward through Richmond) is Center for Elders’ Independence (CEI). Call 510-433-1150, 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. (TDD for the hearing impaired: 510-4331165) or visit www.cei.elders.org The PACE for San Francisco, southern Alameda County and San Jose is On Lok Lifeways. Call 1-888-88-ON-LOK (1-888-886-6565). TDD number for the hearing impaired: 415-292-8898. Or visit www.onlok.org
fessional PACE staff in consultation with the senior participant and his/her family members. The care team includes, but is not limited to, a primary care physician, nurse, nurse practitioner, nutritionist, social worker, physical therapist, occupational therapist, activity director, home care nurse, personal care aide, and transportation representative. This team meets each morning to review the participant’s status and care plan. It’s an intensive and unusual level of coordination.
language is a barrier, and updated you on the outcomes?
Who is eligible? To join the program, a senior must be age 55 years or older, live in the service area of a PACE provider, and be certified by the State as needing nursing facility level of care but able to live safely in the community with supportive PACE services. Most participants in the program have at least seven chronic conditions and also have difficulty caring for themselves in a home en-
Care is fully coordinated Many seniors spend years getting files from one specialist and giving them to another or calling among providers to try and coordinate their own care. One of the successes of the PACE model is that the doctor and all the disciplines meet each morning to plan how to best solve the care needs of each senior. (photo of care team meeting)
Caregivers benefit too Many of us are caring for loved ones and have to choose daily between going to work and taking a parent or neighbor to a doctor’s appointment. Imagine if your loved one’s healthcare provider made the appointment, organized and provided the transportation, sent a door-to-door escort with the van, employed an interpreter if
“The care CEI gives my mom allows me to go on business trips with a clear conscience.” Crystal Rivers, pictured here(right) with her mother and Angelique Ogden, an activity director at CEI.
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The World Institute on Disability
40 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
The World Institute on Disability (WID) began in 1983, founded by leaders of the Independent Living Movement. Co-founders; Judy Heumann, Ed Roberts and Joan Leon wanted to address the inequities faced by people with disabilities in all aspects of society worldwide.
site will simplify and demystify the road from benefits to work for all veterans. Did you know that confusion about benefits programs keeps many people with disabilities from working, due to fear of losing life-saving benefits and health care? That’s why WID produces innovative web-based tools that help Americans with disabilities to learn about their disability benefits. These services empower people to return to work. Our sites also reach out to and educate youth and people with disabilities from underserved and diverse communities about opportunities and strategies to build a better future. Did you know that the majority of people with disabilities in the United States live in poverty, with fear of losing their government benefits? That's why in 2011 WID launched the Center on Economic Growth to focus on increasing employment and economic stand-
chair manufacturing and assembly project in Morocco. Did you know that many countries around the world have no legal rights or protections for people with disabilities? That’s why WID supports the human rights of people with disabilities worldwide, including the implementation of the UN Convention of the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. WID continues to work to advance disability rights and inclusion in the Middle East and North Africa as part of the Justice and Dignity Project – a collaboration of Non-Governmental Organizations focused on human rights. Did you know that many people with disabilities do not have access to health, nutrition and fitness programs that meet their disability-related needs? That's why WID launched the "New Door" program which combines peer support, accessible fitness programs
By Kat Zigmont In years following, WID has promoted long-term systems change, conducted research and advocacy and created far-reaching and influential legislative and policy changes that have improved the lives of people with disabilities. WID leaders helped found the first Center for Independent Living (CIL) in Berkeley - of which there are now over 500 nationally; and have been appointed to positions in the last three administrations working on efforts to develop a comprehensive strategy to promote the rights of persons with disabilities internationally and by developing and influencing disability employment-related policies and practices affecting an increase in the employment of people with disabilities. Even 23 years after having passed the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), many people still do not know the breathe of issues facing the disability community. Let me share with you some of the ways WID works to affect people’s ability to live full and independent lives. Did you know that seventy percent of returning veterans from Iraq and Afghanistan have service-connected disabilities? That's why in 2012 WID launched Vets101.org, a website with free career planning tools and information services that help wounded warriors and veterans navigate the maze of information out there and make informed financial and career decisions. This groundbreaking
WID Co-founders Circa 1983; Ed Roberts, Judy Heumann and Joan Leon (respectivly)
ing of people with disabilities in the U.S. and worldwide. Our exciting new demonstration project aims to promote employment of people with disabilities in small and medium-sized businesses. Did you know that most developing countries have few, if any, programs for providing wheelchairs to people who need them? That’s why WID’s International Program continues to provide start-up money for a small wheelchair business that employs people with disabilities to produce low-cost, high-quality wheelchairs in the Republic of Georgia. We also plan to serve as a partner in the development of a wheel-
and healthy nutrition information in accessible ways. This program encourages people with disabilities to take charge of their health, healthcare, and fitness. WID’s mission will be realized when there is full employment at the same rate as the general population; the barriers to asset building are removed, and people with disabilities have the tools, information, and resources to achieve economic security and build wealth; and people with disabilities have seamless, continuous access to affordable, quality health care and support services. For more information on WID please visit our website: www.wid.org. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 41
PLEASURE SEEKERS
42 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Are you having one of those general days? I mean a typical boring day. You possess the ability if you have the willingness to smack-dab yourself out of your monotony and into a pleasure space. Are you a Pleasure-Seeker? Well, from this day on, you’ve become one. By Mary Ellen Jones
irst, think about a day that was just about perfect. Where were you? Who was involved ? Why was it so perfect? What were the circumstances? You see, in order for you to become a certified Pleasure-Seeker you must take control of your cozy corner of your pleasure seeking brain. Only you can take stock of yourself. You alone determine how to revive the pace of your pleasure. The main opposition is you. Your initial assignment Pleasure-Seeker will be for you to cruise along with me through this article. You’ll pick and choose the items that turn you on, bring you pleasure and make you complete. On board? Here we go. Foot reflexology is mandatory a minimum of once a month for Pleasure-Seekers. I pity the fool who denies the mind, yes, the mind, of such, sheer, explosive, severe pleasure that you don’t want to end. Oh, did I say that? Pleasure-Seekers purchase that one-outof-your-range- piece of jewelry. Usually it’s a ring or a watch. Just wearing it elicits warmth, pride and joy. Everyone should have one very nice piece of bling. That’s your signature piece. You can match up all kinds of imposters
around the real thing, e.g., pearls and emeralds. Occasionally, you will find just the right gem among the zircons. Purchase that pair of show-off shoes that you must have. Don’t even give it a second thought. Money is just a means of exchange. You surrender the cash and the sales associate gives you your shoes. Simple as that. And you know you deserve those kicks!. Now, stop, take a deep breath, exhale. Again, take a deep breath, exhale. Smile and pat that shoe box. Treat yourself to a spa day in the Napa-Sonoma Valley. Pleasure-Seekers, travelers from all over the world trek to God’s heaven on earth. Its natural splendor is gorgeous, compelling and draws you in to its picturesque serenity. All this is located practically in your own backyard. The Napa-Sonoma Valley is slow-paced, a lazy kind of lifestyle featuring virtually every kind of pleasurable experience. It’s one- car fill-up- away and the pleasant drive is part of the adventure. While you’re driving, you’ll think about the scrumptious cuisine waiting for you, basking in the warm clean air, roaming around homemade candy, ice-cream browsing through quaint shops, You may take advantage of the Napa Valley Opera House’s live entertainment, the Mondavi Jazz Festival, magnificent golf courses, parks and hiking trails, and take a ride on the Fun filled Napa Wine Train. Pleasure-Seekers, it’s another world. Take a mental health day. I take one four times a year to coincide with the change in the seasons and daylight savings time. Pleasure-Seekers, you have a license to pursue your pleasure. Life is really good but sometimes you must create opportunity for pleasure to find YOU. So, get ready for it. Will pleasure have difficulty finding you? Why? Dive in, immerse yourself in this good life and the beauty it has to offer. Find the pleasure because the unpleasant stuff will always, always find you. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 43
How to shop for your shape: Denim Style
Do you take on the dreadful task of shopping for jeans? Speading hours sifting through rasks of pants to choose an armful that are worthy to take to the dressing room only to leave empty handed. Well if you are anything like me, you understand this situation to well. So I have created a guide for shopping for denim. Hopefully helpful tips to make your experience more joyous. By Camari Henderson
If you’re an apple shape... You tend to carry weight around the middle so a straight leg jean with a little stretch in the waist will accentuate your best assets. The Levi Curve ID is a great choice for this figure. Avoid super skinny and high-waisted cuts that will draw attention to you mid section. 44 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
If you’re an hourglass shape... You have a curvy yet balanced figure allowing you to wear almost anything, but it is important to dress your curve properly. Wide-legged jeans will enhance your slim waist while Skinny legs will highlight your curves. A contoured waistband like that of the PZI brand jean, will help to avoid exposing to much of your curves when you sit down.
If you’re a pear shape... You tend to carry weight in your butt, hips and legs - the lower half. A mid-rise jean will flatter your shape by elongating your legs. Look more moderate skinny legs jeans like the Mid-Rise Slim Boot Leg jeans by J Brand. Make sure to stay away from the super high-waisted jeans, they will shorten the loook of your legs.
If you’re have an athletic build... You will have to create curves and balancing out your shape at the same time. Bootcut or flared jeans like Lucky Brand’s Flare jeans will balance your silhouette while giving the illusion of a curvier figure. Pocket details and embellishments add body to your curves. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 45
Passing the baton
Is More Than A Notion
46 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Athletic sports consist of rules of engagement. Often the principles mirror examples of techniques and skills useful in ordinary, everyday life experiences. Whether the insights of endurance, courage perseverance are seen the rhythm of on the track, field or pool is far beyond mere entertainment. By Regina Tardy At first glance a track conducting relay races seems to be quite a long distance. Yet, from the moment four well trained athletes take their positions, that same track divides into four equal parts. Four people taking full responsibility for their individual portion of the track with precision, observation and perseverance in tote. Each runner clearly seeing the end while passing the baton from one clinched hand to the next open hand. Teammates completely secure in their individual capabilities, unifying investments of tireless hours stretching, and toning blending the press into one smooth victory that all can celebrate. According to the rules of the game if the baton is passed too quickly, or slowly that dirty little “d” word “interrupting the entire process deeming a nasty disqualification.” No win, no victory, for not one runner, but all four. The race of life also has a start and a finish. In between this tiny stretch of time there are lanes to cross, oppositions, opponents, supporters and opportunities. The choices are endless bringing every participant to lose or win. Perhaps the winners are those who graciously accept from someone’s hands ideas, morals, ideals and substance rather than allow all that information to fall into an abyss of loss. Not every family member remains amongst us in the land of the living, yet their hard work and perseverance is worthy of having a baton to pass along throughout the generations. On many occasions a familiar question echoes throughout the community and trickles in the world at large. Amidst the changes in society, the rapid pace of technology an often unspoken question beckons for an honest answer “What’s wrong with this generation?” The “pass”
is wrong. No one ever passed the baton. Perhaps, the question arrives with an uncomfortable yet realistic answer. Throughout the branches of every family unit information is dropping when all around the nation an increase is taking place. The blaring evidence presents itself as, someplace in this vast world a young bewildered, frustrated man or lady has no inkling of the name, legacy or stride of their great grandparents. Yes, the historical facts are intriguing to know of the elders that have gone forth before them. However, whose baton are they to have right in their own hands? “Who will pass the baton?” Will you pass the baton to your nearest relative? Certainly the branch of the family trees of powerful matriarchs and patriarchs live through the purposes of their lives being fulfilled. They are surely of more value than simple introductions through photographs and their names. Beyond monetary gains, land and property so diligently earned and passed down to generations is respect, honor and wisdom. The wondrous matriarchs, and patriarchs, husbands and wives of previous generations are which whom the first batons were presented. It is only fair to pass all information to ensure a win. In doing so no one’s life is ever reclassified as “old fashioned” and received as a passing from one hand to the next sharing perseverance every step of the way. Rather than stamp the generations with the taglines of “what’s wrong with them?” recover the dropped batons and move forward in teaching and reaching. What a wondrous discovery to take part in the actual responsibility of ensuring the pass of information, wisdom, faith and common decency toward self and the community will forever remain a possibility forever.
Five Baton Passes HOW: Keep in mind what information was handed to you that helped you to thrive and survive. WHEN: Honor the memory of loved ones by continuing the journey they began. WHY: Your story is of interest, share your process, ideas and ideals with loved ones by descriptive how, when and how. You will one day become an elder, matriarch, or patriarch. Leave information concerning how you arrived to become a legacy every step of the way. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 47
Understanding the
Veterans Benefits Administration
for Seniors
48 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Those who have served in the Armed Forces of America as well as those who served under the Command of the Armed Forces of America in foreign countries, have several benefits that they are eligible for based upon their ability to prove their service. Their surviving families are also eligible based upon certain criteria. By John Forrett, Member of the American Legion, San Francisco Bay Area.
T
he Veterans Administration has Three Divisions; 1. The Veterans Hospital Administration which operates the hospitals & clinics nationwide, 2. The Veterans Benefit Administration which manages the life insurance, home loans, student loans and the Veteran compensation and survivor spouse/children pensions, 3. The National Cemetery Administration which operates & maintains the 131 National Cemeteries throughout the United States. The text below in italics is directly from the VA website information pages. I will explain each of the divisions briefly and in follow-up article’s in this publication will get into more detail of each and provide the most up to date benefits. The reason for the need to keep up to date is due to the fact that as the Congress of the United States and the President of the United States change offices every election cycle and along with that the benefits structure changes by Congressional Budgets, enacted laws, regulations or executive orders. The Veteran Hospital Administration provides all the medical services and equipment
for all eligible Veterans under the VA medical benefit program. Those who served for a few years are the main target population, but military retiree’s & spouses use the system under the Tri-Care retirement benefit program. For the purposes of explaining who is eligible for this benefit, it is important to know. According to the VA website, a person is eligible If you served in the active military, naval or air service and are separated under any condition other than dishonorable, you may qualify for health care benefits. Also, current and former members of the Reserves or National Guard who were called to active duty (other than for training only) by a federal order and completed the full period for which they were called or ordered to active duty may be eligible for VA health care. The period of time that was needed to serve to qualify varies from the different war periods, but for the purposes of Veteran Seniors, you must have served 90 days prior to 1980 to qualify. To apply, you must fill out the VA Form 1010EZ which is available on the VA website http:// www.va.gov by searching the form number or for those who do not use a computer call 1-877-222-VETS (8387). The search or call in is the same for the division listed below. The Veteran Benefit Administration is the place to apply for the items listed above, but I will focus on the pension’s portion for this article. The qualifying criteria for the Veteran is the
above listed for the healthcare criteria plus either a service connected injury, which a VA doctor must examine the Veteran or the “Aid & Attendance” pension which has specific medical & income requirements. The VA Form to apply for either is the Veteran’s Application for Compensation and/or Pension Form 21-526. The survivor spouse/children application is a financial needs basis only and that form is the Application for Dependency and Indemnity Compensation, Death Pension, and Accrued Benefits by Surviving Spouse or Child Form 21-534. The National Cemetery Administration Burial benefits available include a gravesite in any of the 131 national cemeteries with available space, opening and closing of the grave, perpetual care, a Government headstone or marker, a burial flag, and a Presidential Memorial Certificate, at no cost to the family. Some Veterans may also be eligible for Burial Allowances. Cremated remains are buried or inurned in national cemeteries in the same manner and with the same honors as casketed remains. The cemeteries in the San Francisco Bay Area open for reservations are the Sacramento Valley National Cemetery, 5810 Midway Road, Dixon, CA 95620 (707) 693-2460 and the San Joaquin Valley National Cemetery, 32053 West McCabe Road, Santa Nella, CA 95322 (209) 854-1040 or for out of the area call: (202) 461-6240. Call them to arrange for the benefits.
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Family Mean to You? What Does
50 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
Featured Articles
If one were to ask you the question, what does family mean to you? What comes to your mind? Do terms like offspring, kinship, or blood relationships surface? Or, do you think of groups of people connected together by something in common? By Patsy Lax-Lockhart Regardless of personal definition, there seems to be a spiritual sense in what the term family means. I wondered if it enough to be family or does one do family? Family seems to extend from one to another. As one journeys through the process of “family”, peace, and the essence of happiness occurs. Borrowing from the words of the author Bell Hooks, Belonging-a culture of place, “place” embraces heart and ultimately, a culture of connected-belonging transpires. Her presentation examines the physical but more importantly the psychological place one calls home. Family and home seem synonymous with comfort and a welcomed spiritual resting place. There once was a time the term family seemed ever-present. The concept of the love of family was so clear. The practice of tradition, organization, and active inclusiveness were obvious templates. Family culture evolved especially through struggle, and reliance on Christian discipline, while blindly constructing character within. This life factor bridged to promoting acts of self-otherness, which inheritably enriched and created a strong healthy living environment or community. Observing my home, I see my maternal and paternal grandparents’ portraits, my brother and sister and their families, my children and their families, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends One can learn much about what family means by examining the photos that outline their home. I see my deceased father’s journey as a Grand Mason, a United States Army soldier, his travels, fishing results, and happy times both when being visited and visiting family. Whispers of his voice seem to appear, “ Just keep your eyes on your books.” Obvious are images of people present in
my life not related. There is the presence of current friends that have been with me through the most significant stages in my life. Portfolios of obituaries carry stories worth sharing. They serve as reminders of those who once directly impacted my life in momentous ways that reinforce my connection and belief in God. This act helps me to define what family is to me. Deeper reflection allowed me to consider the history of kidnapped Africans who were shipped to the Americas during the 1600s. Placed in physical and psychological bondage, removed from their indigenous family identity and customs, a determined people sought strategies to persevere. One could feel the power of extending beyond kinship to establish a sense of family in order to survive inhuman treatment. Recently, I visited my father’s hometown, a former slave state, Diaz, Arkansas. Unaware of time, daylight to dusk discussions occurred with a person who carried a considerable amount of my family’s history. Her stories were like books with chapters. Her stories connected me to memories of unexplained people who lived in the homes of relatives who had nowhere else to go during my childhood. It was apparent that this was an example of how we made family beyond family. They represented step, in-law, lost, disabled, foster family, and so on. This reminded me of an African presenter who stated, “As long as there is “family,” there is no homelessness. One indelible experience I hope to never forget is what happened at a midweek evening wedding of a young couple, at Allen Temple Baptist Church, in Oakland, California. It was an awesome awakening to have known the Bride’s mother, from pre pregnancy only to witness to this pivotal onset of her next generation. The day of the wedding the church was packed like a mid sunny Saturday afternoon. In seconds, to fill operational gaps, invited church guests transformed into ushers, gift and guest book attendants, food servers, cleanup crew, maintenance and greeters with a smile. The ceremony and reception throughout appeared as a video straight out of heaven! By evening, I thought to myself, wow, now this is family. Despite observations past or present, the evolution of family is not necessarily rooted in DNA but in the personal ties that bind the concept of family. Establishing its meaning, allows one to celebrate the culture of what family is and what it does. It naturally propels the ability to respect, to nurture, to challenge, and to live. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 51
PERCEPTION My husband left a beautifully written poem, professing his undying love, beside my bed this morning. Next to it a dozen gorgeous, partially opened, wild red roses still wet from the morning dew. He cut them from the open field behind the house before slipping off to work, cutting the stems at an angle, removing the thorns and arranging them in a vase. By Roni Gates
H
e’s a true romantic. He’ll work until 3:00 pm today, and I’ll clean the house and work on getting the nursery and other projects done. When he gets home I’ll greet him with a glass of wine, his favorite slippers and a sport that I recorded earlier in the day. He watches it 52 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
for about a half hour, as I prepare the table for dinner, and then turns his full attention to me, listening to me chatter excitedly about my day, as we eat. We’ll take a stroll in the moonlight by the lake through the quiet park, just two blocks from our house. Walking arm in arm, we’ll discuss our future plans to travel
the world and raise a family in the 2500 square foot home that we had built last year. Once home, we fall naturally into a passionate embrace and tirelessly make love to the soft music that joins us in the celebration of our love. We have the perfect marriage and a perfect, well-balanced life. Would you agree that this sounds like an ideal way to start a family, but not reality for most? When presented with the topic “What family means to me,” it was as difficult to write about as I thought it would be. I thought I might be able to relate only to those who have shared a family experience similar to mine, growing up in a home filled with chaos, abuse, fear and isolation. I found, however, after talking with several others, that they too had at least one painful component to their family, typically on a smaller scale, yet still a potential threat to the very threads that bond a family together. Each individual’s perception of how they saw the world around them, when they were being shaped as children, greatly impacted their relationships as adults. I believe this perception can change as we mature, em-
brace our past for what it was, be thankful for what we have learned and make careful choices that shape our future. We have to claim our power to change cycles we find ourselves involuntarily caught up in from our childhood. The story above is my version of the start to a perfect family, which comes from a very vivid imagination and many years of dedicated television watching. The idea remains, as I step back into my reality, that family is still an essential part of being a healthy and happy human being, no matter how scary or difficult it may be. But what happens when someone loses their family at an early age or never experiences a healthy family atmosphere in their life? I imagine we must fight to hold onto the rare, little gems of beauty and innocence that we come across in our early years, when we are naive, impressionable and building our own perceptions. I believe we file them away for later processing and use them when it feels safe to do so. That’s what I did. Santa Claus always came to our house on Christmas Eve and my parents would wake us up to let us know that he had been there. The ever-familiar, beautifully decorated tree that boasted multicolored, blinking lights and well-used, mismatched ornaments, was jubilantly calling me over to see what Santa had brought. We waited patiently for our turn, as the gifts were passed around, then ripped the paper to shreds and squealed with delight at whatever was revealed. This was definitely the happiest time of year for me. The regular routine of our parents’ fighting, yelling and breaking things would take a temporary backseat and allow us a small glimpse of what family life could really be like. I was five years old on this particular Christmas Eve. We had already opened our presents and cleaned up the paper. I was standing at the window staring out at the perfectly symmetrical lights that adorned our neighbors’ homes, holding my brand new Baby Alive. I was filled with excitement yet an empty, heavy heart as I knew these happy times would soon be over. Other than my birthday, when my parents exempted me from most of the usual punishments, everything would go back to the way it always was. I gently rocked the doll in my arms, dreaming of the day when I would be holding a real, live human baby. My baby. I would give him all the love I didn’t get and make my own family exactly the way it was supposed to be. Mine would be like the ones I saw on TV or like the ones I saw some of the kids at school have.
This is the night that I began to plan my escape so I could set out to accomplish this mission. I was on a fast track to what would become the most difficult yet, in many ways, an ultimately fulfilling road to travel. My main reason for sharing this part of my story is to point out that you never know what someone may be going through or where they may have been just by looking at them. No one ever knew of this plan that started when I was only five years old, nor can they tell today by my appearance, what I went through back then. I believe we should delicately engage others. Undoubtedly they have gone through or are currently going through some traumatic experience. We may hold the key of influence that will help them make a healthier decision, ultimately taking them down a positive road. It certainly won’t hurt, but it will take a little time and effort. By God’s grace I did manage to raise my family, as a single mother, with minimal damage stemming from repeated offenses learned from my childhood. I tried fervently to produce the rich family environment that I only dreamed of as a child.
in other states and are rarely seen or maybe they have passed away. How about those who have been alienated from their family or maybe those who are homeless and either don’t have any existing family or are too afraid to contact them? What about the shutins or the mentally ill? The elderly who are in care homes? Who do they call their family? For those of us who are blessed with or fortunate enough to have someone close to us, maybe it’s up to us to extend a hand to those who don’t. It doesn’t take much. Sometimes it’s enough just to smile and take a moment to talk with them and let them know that they are important too. Sometimes we may need to help them with a little money for groceries for the week. Sitting and visiting with an elderly person for fifteen to thirty minutes will dramatically lift their spirits and give them back a little of the hope that they once had. Allowing a neighborhood teen an opportunity to gain job experience by mowing our lawn or walking our dog. How about that teenage mother, living in the neighborhood, who was abandoned by her new husband and is now
Typically, we consider “family” to be those who are living under one roof. Our work associates are often those we are around most often and get closest to emotionally. Needless to say, I fell short, however, my efforts paid off and my flourishing kids turned out to be responsible, God-fearing, contributors to society and loving family members. Typically, we consider “family” to be those who are living under one roof. Our work associates are often those we are around most often and get closest to emotionally. We often consider them to be family. Many people have a church “home” and the other members are considered and even called their brothers and sisters and thought of as family. How about neighbors we may be close to? Events that we attend? I believe family can be anyone you mutually love and trust. What about those who are estranged from their families? Many times the ones dearest to our hearts are living
caring for their two kids on her own? There are opportunities all around us if we just pay attention to them. If we stop judging others, based on ourselves, then we will see past some of the preconceived ideas that we have about some of the less-than-desirable people out there in our world that we often overlook because we don’t have enough information before jumping to conclusions about their character. Maybe we’re just minding our own business. If we’re honest though, sometimes it’s because we just don’t want to take the time to concern ourselves with someone else’s problems. Everyone needs someone. Maybe we can be that someone. Aren’t we all living under the same roof? We are, after all, living under the same sky. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 53
Tips for leaving a legacy to your Adult Children (Part 1 of a 3-part series*)
By Lillian Nealy The legacy you’ll leave is more important than all your worldly possessions combined. Leaving a legacy for your children requires no will to find its rightful place in your children and your children’s children. In fact you don’t even have to be deceased 54 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
for it to become valuable to them. Most people think of inheritance, as a time when the family gets together once there is a death. In fact, “inheritance” and “will” go hand in hand. God’s goodness in us prompts us to leave an inheritance for our children. (Prov. 13:22). Just as God gives us good gifts, so we desire to give good gifts to our children. Therefore, we must plan the inheritance and legacy we’ll leave. That plan embraces good financial management as well as an intentional teaching of God’s truths to our children. Leaving a Godly Legacy is our purpose as parents. It is mandated in Scripture. Our most important job is to teach our children about the Lord and make it a priority. “You must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:6-9 When your children grow in Christ, it helps them to become friends for life to the parents as a bonus. What a joy it is to have
our adult children as friends, confidants who share not only thoughts and opinions, but relate to us intimately, heart to heart. Many of us from the generation of the 50’s and 60’s had parents who did provide us with a legacy and were probably not sure how or what that meant. Hopefully, as I share it will assist you in learning what is involved in leaving a legacy for your next generations.
Children are products of their environment. As you parented your children you probably remember the saying, “more is caught than taught.” It is true. Your children have developed many of your traits, weather you were wanting them to or not. When my daughter was in college she wrote a paper about herself and used this quote “Little eyes are always watching you” Dionna M. Perkins. Today she is a fourth generation of “educators”. Okay, you can’t go back and relive those earlier years with your children, however, you can start now in working on what you will want them to remember about YOUR life. Your legacy. * - Look for Part 2 of this series in our Spring Summer 2014 issue.
Health & Wellness
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The Families in My Life
I’m an only child. My mother was an only child. My grandmother was orphaned before age 10. Until my mother was 9, she and her mother were often homeless, sleeping in train stations in early twentieth century Texas. They were bound at night by their love for one another and by the rope that tied my mother’s wrist to my grandmother’s wrist, so that no one could steal my mother in the middle of the night. That almost happened once. By John Bilorusky
I was raised by my mother and grandmother—the three of us together, a tiny family oasis, sharing a lot of love, mutual respect and cooperation. Today, if I sometimes “do the right thing” as a parent, a husband, or friend and colleague, it’s because of what I learned growing up in that tiny three-generation family of three. I live with my wife of 18 years, Janet, our two fifteen-year-old twins, Kyle and Nicole, and nearby, my adult son, Clark, his wife, Donna, and their toddler son, Ilaw. We share a lot of the same love, respect and cooperation I experienced growing up—in a larger and more “conventional” looking family, with a bit more chaos in our lives and our share of petty squabbles, but no less joy, no less love. 56 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
But this isn’t my only family; I have a very special extended family, a multicultural learning community of talented and deeply committed people, the Western Institute for Social Research—“WISeR” as we call ourselves (www. wisr.edu). In 1975, I co-founded this alternative, community-oriented academic institution. Our educational mission has been to emphasize intense and personalized student-faculty collaboration, and in doing so, to provide an alternative path to achieving BA, MA and Doctoral degrees for a modest number of motivated adults interested in progressive social change. Little did I know that as a founding member of the faculty, I was also creating lifelong friendships and an extended family for myself and for my “regular”
family, and that I would still be there 39 years later with no plans to retire until I’m on, or near, my death bed. Little did I know that I would learn so much from my students and that my immediate family and I would be so inspired by and experience so much support and hope from the endeavors of the people in the WISeR family. There is Dennis Hastings, a Native American who occupied Alcatraz over 40 years ago and who then returned to his home on the Omaha reservation in Nebraska. With his colleague and fellow WISR alum, Margery Coffey, they have been working outside the public eye, to preserve and restore the history and language of the Omaha people—writing the definitive, tribal-sanctioned history of the Omaha, working with teachers and students in their local schools, planning for a museum to house the sacred and cherished artifacts of the Omaha, and more. Dennis and I met in the mid-70s, and we have remained close friends and colleagues for all these years, and we all feel part of the “WISeR family” as do many others. There is WISR alum, David Yamada, the down-toearth, unassuming tenured professor of law at Suffolk University in Boston. David is one of the foremost experts on workplace bullying in the US, writing articles and legislation to address this serious problem. There is PhD student, Agnes Morton, longtime San Francisco public health nurse, who upon retirement a few years ago returned to the community where she grew up, Overtown, in Miami. Within this low-income African American community, she has become a community organizer and an indigenous health educator in her 70s. These WISR students work in their communities with a strong sense of inspiration and support from their WISeR family. My wife and kids get to know these people, talk with them, learn from them, be inspired by them. Like uncles and aunts and cousins. When my twins were about five they had to give up the baby goats they had raised in our Oakland backyard, because of one neighbor’s complaints of the noise. But the goats stayed in our family and we have been able to visit them because we gave them to our long-time friend from the WISeR family, Shyaam Shabaka, to keep on his EcoVillage Farm In Richmond. I am thankful for my first tiny family of three, for my home life family of today, and for my WISeR family. I have learned much from all of them, and all of them give me hope that many different kinds of families can create a better world.
Alameda County & The Bay Area News and Information When is it proposed to begin? The CCI could launch as early as October 2013 or as late as January 2014. Enrollment would take place over a period of months. People with Medi-Cal will receive a notice 60 days in advance about their enrollment options. Enrollment is “passive,” meaning that if you don’t make a choice, you will be automatically enrolled.
What is the difference between the Coordinated Care Initiative and Covered California? By Wendy Peterson
California’s Coordinated Care Initiative and What It Means to Seniors in Alameda County But none of those topics generate more angst and anxiety than the one I’d label “the confusing world of healthcare coverage.” I’ve talked to many smart, well educated people who have been defeated in their attempts to navigate, for example, Medicare’s prescription drug benefit. Well, the world of healthcare coverage is about to get a lot more exciting. California is gearing up to launch the Coordinated Care Initiative, a change in health policy affecting seniors and people with disabilities in eight counties, including Alameda, Santa Clara and San Mateo Counties. Although the Coordinated Care Initiative isn’t expected to launch until this Fall at the earliest, it just makes sense to be informed and proactive, so I’m going to devote my column to just that.
Who will the Coordinated Care Initiative affect? Let’s call it the “CCI.” The CCI will affect most seniors and people with disabilities who have Medi-Cal, including most people who have both Medi-Cal and Medicare. The CCI will not affect people who have just Medicare. The CCI is not a one-size-fits-all, however. It will affect different people in different ways, depending on their current coverage.
What will CCI change? The CCI will put Medi-Cal-covered long term services – nursing home care, case management, in-home supportive services, and adult day health care – into local Managed Care Plans. Today Medi-Cal coverage for those services is available directly from the state. The CCI will change that, so that most people will have to be enrolled in a Managed Care Plan in order to get Medi-Cal coverage for long term services. Also, the CCI will offer an option to people who have both Medi-Cal and Medicare (the so-called “Duals”). The “Duals Demonstration” – now called “CalMediConnect” – will combine Medicare and Medi-Cal in Managed Care Plans that coordinate health care and long term services and supports. Today, most consumers receive medical care from one set of providers (their doctors, hospitals) and supportive services from another (home care, meals-on-wheels, adult day health care, etc.). Your doctor may never know that you receive meals on wheels or that you need in-home care. This fragmentation often leads to confusion, delayed or inappropriate care, and unnecessary costs. The intent of the CCI is to integrate services, financing, and care coordination, thereby improving health and lowering costs.
The CCI is a change in coverage affecting most people with Medi-Cal. For those who don’t currently have Medi-Cal or employer-sponsored health coverage and are not eligible for Medicare, Covered California could offer solutions. Covered California is the name of the health care coverage marketplace created by the Affordable Care Act. The coverage starts in January 2014, but the open enrollment for that coverage starts in October 2013. Another distinction: For people who have Medicare coverage and do not have Medi-Cal, Medicare’s Open Enrollment period (from October 15 through December 7) is still the time to look at your health care coverage and decide what options will best suit your needs.
How can you stay informed? Even though the Coordinated Care Initiative, Covered California and Medicare’s Open Enrollment are months away, there are some things you can do, and should do to be proactive and in control of your own healthcare. If you have Medi-Cal, be alert for mailings from Department of Health Care Services. Watch for information and events at local community centers and senior centers. If you receive notices or have concerns about your health care coverage, contact the Health Insurance Counseling & Advocacy Program (HICAP) in Alameda County at www.lashicap.org or 510-839-0393. If you’re interested in following the development of the Coordinated Care Initiative as it makes its way through the final planning stages, go to www.calduals.org . If you don’t have Medi-Cal or other coverage, and are not eligible for Medicare, check out your options by visiting www.coveredca.com. To keep up with developments in Alameda County, go to www.seniorservicescoalition.org. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 57
ALAMEDA CONTRA COSTA (CA) CHAPTER OF THE LINKS,
INCORPORATED AWARDS ANN C. CATO SCHOLARSHIP
(Oakland, CA) Alameda Contra Costa (CA) Chapter of The Links Incorporated held its Holiday Luncheon at the Sequoyah Country Club on Sunday, December 8th. During the annual event, the Ann C. Cato Scholarship was awarded to D. Melodie Thompson, currently a graduate student at Samuel Merritt University where she is studying to become an Occupational Therapist. A graduate of UC Santa Cruz, she plans to focus her career on working with children with physical disabilities. “I am very grateful for this scholarship today and will make every effort to make a difference to children with disabilities in this community after my graduation,” said Thompson.
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Ann C. Cato, for whom the scholarship is named played an integral part in the founding of Alameda Contra Costa Chapter of The Links, Incorporated. Her untimely death occurred prior to the 1985 chartering of the chapter. In her memory, ACCL
established the Scholarship which is given each year to a special education student, or to a student pursuing a teaching career in the field of special education. The Links, Incorporated, an international, not-for-profit organization was, established in 1946. There are 12,000 professional women in 276 chapters in 41 states, the District of Columbia and the Commonwealth of the Bahamas. It is one of the nation’s oldest and largest volunteer service organizations committed to enriching, sustaining and ensuring the culture and economic well-being of African Americans The Links, Incorporated programming has five facets which include National Trends and Services, The Arts, Services to Youth, International Trends and Services and Health and Human Services. The programs are implemented through strategies such as public information and education, economic development, and public policy campaigns. To learn more about The Alameda Contra Costa Links Incorporated, visit the website at www. alamedacontracostalinksinc.org and our national website at www.linksinc.org.
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2-1-1
Assists Seniors Access Services The 2-1-1 Alameda County Communication System is a vital part of the social service system for the community’s senior residents, providing information on needs such as where to find subsidized senior housing, in-home care referrals, physical and mental health care programs, health insurance information, hot meals and food programs, para-transit and senior-ride programs and more to those who need it, all quickly and free of charge. By Mitch Rietman
E
den I&R (Information and Referral) has been providing I&R services since 1976 and has been operating 2-1-1 in Alameda County since 2007. 2-1-1 is the three-digit phone number that is available 24/7, in multiple languages, to assist individuals and families access free or low-cost resources. It has become a critical link for thou-
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sands of people in need: youth, non-English speakers, the economically disadvantaged, people living with HIV/AIDS, domestic violence survivors, the elderly, disabled, the homeless, and human service agency staff seeking services or housing for their clients. 2-1-1 Alameda County assisted 105,569 callers during Fiscal Year 2013 (July 1, 2012-June 30,
2013) and referred these callers to over 189,000 health, housing, and human service programs. 9% of the calls were from senior citizens age 62 and above. According to the Alameda County Social Services Coalition, which represents nonprofit and public providers of health and supportive services for seniors, half of all seniors in the county are economically insecure and over 20% are food insecure. One-third report fair or poor health status and one in seven experience frequent mental distress. The Coalition notes that access to needed social services is critical to helping older adults as they age and struggle to remain economically stable and in their homes or communities. 2-1-1 is a lifeline for seniors to connect with the wealth of programs and services designed to address their health, housing, and human service needs. 2-1-1 provides information and resources to callers that inform and empower them to become better advocates for themselves and their loved ones. 2-1-1 assesses needs and provides information such as which agency/program can assist with free information and counseling on Medicare, long-term care insurance, Medicare Advantage plans, and prescription drugs, at no cost to the caller. 2-1-1 also maintains information on: Programs that provide free legal assistance in such areas as Elder Abuse Prevention, Guardianship of Minors, Public Benefits, Health Law (Medicare/Medi-Cal), and Immigration/Naturalization issues. agencies in Alameda County that can assist seniors with legal representation in court, administrative hearings, and/or referrals to other community resources. which subsidized housing waitlists are open in Alameda County where callers can apply for CalFresh and/ or receive food, where to locate rent, deposit or utility assistance Eden I&R, Inc. (Information and Referral) is a nonprofit agency designated by the California Public Utilities Commission as the 2-1-1 provider for Alameda County. The agency is a 2-1-1 Bay Area partner with The United Way of the Bay Area and the Contra Costa Crisis Center. Eden I&R’s other services include an Earned Income Tax Credit (EITC) phone line, an extensive Housing Database of over 72,000 units, Housing Resource Roving Projects, the AIDS Housing and Information Project, and The Big Blue Book: Directory of Human Services for Alameda County. To learn more about Eden I&R’s services, go to 211alamedacounty.org.
A capacity crowd, a 150-voice choir, dozens of youth, family members from far and near, and many friends gathered to say “goodbye, until we meet again” to Sister Betty Gadling, Minister of Music Emeritus at Allen Temple Baptist Church in Oakland, California and a founding member of the Allen Temple Performing Arts Academy at her Memorial on June 22, 2003. By Dean Ferrier
Going On to
Glory creates ATBC Music/ Scholarship program
We shed tears but these were tears of joy mingled with those of sadness. Sadness because she could no longer be with us in the flesh, but tears of joy because we could see and hear during the Memorial some of the fruits of her labors during the 37 years that she was Minister of Music at Allen Temple. Her idea was to reach out to young people and to include them in the artistic expression of the church, as well as to adults. And her success in this venture was demonstrated during the Memorial. This is best exemplified by their inclusion during the Memorial. Nine young people performed what I would call a medley of “spiritual”
rap combined with a demonstration of instrumental ability, a difficult task even when performed by professionals; a young lady who was a part of the summer school music camp and who went on to study choreography at a major university performed a “liturgical” dance; words from two young people who were a part of the first Summer School Music Camp and who expressed in moving words the effect that she had on their lives (one has produced her first film, the other is becoming a classical pianist). And not least, the performance of a Mass Choir, all of whom had sung under Sister Betty’s direction, and who interpreted songs composed by Sis-
ter Betty or arranged by Dr. Alvin McClean. Also we cannot ignore the celebration of Black History Month which included such participants as Wynton Marsalis, Kirk Whalum and Regina Carter. Throughout her service at Allen Temple, Sister Betty stressed the importance of education in modern day life. She encouraged children and youth to think of a career early on and to work toward that goal. Knowing that learning is one of the keys to living a successful life and realizing how costly it is, a Scholarship Committee has been formed, the aim of which is to award scholarships to attend the Betty D. Gadling Fine Arts Academy on the Allen Temple Baptist Church Campus which opened in January 2014. Ms. Heidi Hill, noted soprano, has been named Director. This will benefit worthy students to help them deal with the ever-increasing cost of education. We are glad to add, classes in theater performing arts, praise dance and studio production just to name a few, which will include people of all ages. If you need more information please contact Ms. Heidi Hill or Dr. Alvin Mclean at 510.544.8910. Information concerning the Betty D. Gadling Scholarships can be obtained from the Scholarship Committee Secretary at sasslwb@ yahoo.com. The scholarship applications must be postmarked no later than April 30. 2014. RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 61
loading and launching apps, as is simply using all the different features on a cell phone. A small bump up in tech skills can make a huge difference in how well your family can serve, support, and show love to each other.
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CREATE a family map, so that you can literally look at a map and see where all your loved ones are located. Someone who is tech-savvy can create a family map online in Google maps, and anyone can get a basic paper AAA map and start detailing where everyone lives. If someone in your family is more artistic, you can put pictures of people and other details on your map to really make it show your family beautifully.
4 Prepare Your Family to
Prosper! All of us want our families to be safe and protected. Even if we don’t think about it, or put much time to making it so, the safety and security of our families is near and dear to us all. By Ana-Marie Jones What’s less obvious is HOW to make it a reality. Most public safety and emergency services agencies focus on telling you to plan for the threats we face. The long list of threats includes earthquakes, fires, floods, crime, violence, and disease. If you’ve heeded those messages, and if you have already embraced making yourself and your family more prepared, congratulations 62 RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014
– you are in the small group that has taken that important message to heart! We’ve found that there is a happier, healthier, easier way to empower and protect your family. Rather than trying to prepare them for disasters, take on that you are preparing them to prosper. You are making sure your family will be brilliant and resilient in the face of crisis or opportunity! By taking the focus off of scary future disasters, and bringing a laser-focus to making your family immediately more connected, resourceful, and resilient, you can change your world. Some of the easiest things you can do to prepare your family to prosper!: MAKE sure all family members are programmed into each other’s phones. Everything, absolutely everything, is easier when it’s easy to communicate.
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GET your most tech-savvy family members to help others move beyond simply having names and phone numbers stored in their cell phones. Texting is a teachable skill, so is down-
UNITE your family on social media sites like Facebook. Even if your family members have no desire to post and share on Facebook, even if they decide to keep their identities hidden from the rest of the world, they should appreciate and benefit from the fact that Facebook is a large, resilient company. If a disaster takes Facebook offline, we know they have the resources to get back online quickly. Uniting on Facebook has been a true gift for families across the world.
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HEAL old wounds and breaks in relationships. If there are broken relationships or strained relations that are keeping your family from being as strong, united, or loving as you’d like, some proactive fence mending may be needed. Feel free to use CARD’s AARP model: Acknowledge what happened, and the hurt/ upset it caused. Apologize for your part in whatever happened. Repair whatever can be repaired. Put in place whatever you/they need, so that forgiveness can happen, and familial love can hope to flourish. Few things can rival the power of having a strong, united, resilient family. Go forth and make your family more resilient and brilliant today! Ana-Marie Jones is the executive director of CARD – Collaborating Agencies Responding to Disasters, which was created by nonprofits serving vulnerable consumers, to serve the readiness needs of the nonprofit sector. This October will be CARD’s 25th anniversary! To learn more about CARD's fear-free approach to personal and community resilience, please call 510-4513140, email info@CARDcanhelp.org, visit www. CARDcanhelp.org, and link on www.Facebook. com/CARDcanhelp.
John L. Burris, Esq. John L. Burris, Esq. Esq. Benjamin Nisenbaum, Benjamin Nisenbaum, Adanté D. Pointer, Esq. Esq. Adanté D. Pointer, Steven R. Yourke, Esq.Esq. Steven Yourke, DeWitt M.R.Lacy, Esq.Esq. DeWitt M. Lacy, Esq.
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T 510.839.5200/F 510.839.3882 www.johnburrislaw.com
Areas of Practice: Police Misconduct/ Wrongful Death Personal Injury/Sexual Harassment/Toxic Tort/Criminal Defense
John L. Burris, Esq.
Civil Rights and Personal Injury Attorneys Our firm handles personal injury and wrongful death cases, representing victims of permanent, disabling injuries caused by negligence or intentional acts. We also provide criminal defense with a special emphasis on civil rights violations that occur during police profiling, arrests and searches.
RENEW - Fall / Winter 2014 63
The National Action Network (NAN) is one of the leading civil rights organizations in the Nation with chapters throughout the entire United States. Founded in 1991 by Reverend Al Sharpton, NAN works within the spirit and tradition of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. to promote a modern civil rights agenda that includes the fight for one standard of justice, decency and equal opportunities for all people regardless of race, religion, nationality or gender.
On October 7, 2013 Dr. Charley Hames, Jr., began the process of forming the Oakland Chapter of NAN. Understanding the struggles of the Oakland community and the issues that impact all of the community, there was a strong need to standup and make a difference. As a result he appointed a team of professionals to serve on the board uniting as one to continue the fight for social justice for our people.
National Action Network's membership is open to any person or entity that promotes a doctrine of civil rights and fairness for all people. NAN members share a commitment to civil rights and frequently mobilize in regions across the country to protect equal rights and a modern day civil rights agenda. NAN members are granted access to monthly membership calls with NAN's President and Founder Rev. Al Sharpton and the NAN senior leadership Join the Oakland Chapter of NAN TODAY. You may go online to apply for membership on our website at www.NANOakland.org If you have any membership questions please contact our membership Chair Cathy D. Adams cdaconsultingroup@gmail.com ######