200th Issue Prediction

September 25, 2122 VOLUME 200 By: Chloe Sapp V

100 years ago, The Pepper Box reached the giant milestone of 100 years of publishing. In this issue, we get to celebrate 200 years. So much has changed in 100 years, so let’s take a look at some of the changes that have occurred over the century.

THE PEPPER BOX

Back in the 100th issue, our school newspaper was using Times New Roman everywhere. I mean, EVERYWHERE. The font that has since been banned from usage in schools because of the visceral reactions it gets whenever used was the only font used for stories. Can you imagine? I know, I’m shuddering thinking about it. Obviously now we have substituted that awful, awful font for Comic Sans, as it has been the only font available for decades now. Another vast difference between the old paper and the current one is the photography. If you look back at the 100th issue, you’ll see the photos and you’ll wonder how anyone could even make them out! The photos in the old issues were always taken from an outsiders point of view. We don’t need all of those extra parts because 10 years ago, we developed a way where we can take photos with our own eyes. All of our photos are taken by the people that would’ve been in them in the old days. You get to see exactly what the quarterback or singer sees in our papers, right before they blink. The photos basically take themselves.

TECHNOLOGY

Just like the change from cameras to eyeballs, we’ve had many changes in our usage of technology. The editors writing those articles 100 years ago were tirelessly typing away on keys on a keyboard, having to constantly fight “writer’s block”, a term for when the writer had no clue what to write. They typed away for minutes, hours, days, working hard to get words on papers and papers out to their consumers. Now, our papers are written right from the brains of our editors and staff. Every word you read is just a thought from the writer. Once the writer stops their writing by thinking the words “stop writing”, the story then is presented before the writer, ready to make any edits if needed, but that feature is often skipped as our system has a 99% success rate. Once proofread, the story is ready to be sent out. This has made production of our papers extremely easy and is why we now release editions every 3 days, compared to when they had one paper out each month.

SPORTS

When looking at the differences between now and then, the way we play sports is probably the biggest change. Ritenour’s proud to say their students have grown, literally. The losing streak across the board that lasted from 20302040 was too much of an embarrassment for the higher ups. So, Ritenour invested in the best training for student athletes. This training was a top secret summer camp that ended with athletes coming out twice their size and with speed the other teams could never beat. Reports of what actually occurred in this summer camp are still classified.

THE HIGH SCHOOL

The way our high school is run is vastly different from before. It’s still hard to believe that students used to be taught by real adults. When that news broke, no one could imagine it. Everyone has become so used to our state of the art robot teachers. Knowing anything and everything without beating around the bush or answering questions with more questions, robot teachers have been proven superior. Through looking at the old issues of the Pepper Box, we learned that hallways were an issue. Back then, every student walked in the hallways. Walked. The change from walking to teleporting to class was such an improvement that the overall happiness of our student body had gone up by trillions. Trying to imagine all of Ritenour’s students walking in the hallways now feels like a near impossible task.