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Living When I first started dating my ex-wife it never occurred to me to get her anything on Valentine's Day. She spent the next several weeks in a huff. On our second Valentine's Day together, I gave her a nice piece of jewelry and she gave me an oven mitt. Needless to say, I never did figure her out. We were married the following year and divorced five years later. She got the house and I got to keep the oven mitt.
VALENTINE'S DAY Bret Burquest February 14 is Valentine's Day.
On Valentine's Day, or any other day, a woman may ask a seemingly innocent question. A correct answer will usually lead to temporary approval, at least until the next seemingly innocent question. But any dimwitted answer, of which there are many, will surely bring about long-term torment. Question: "Do you love me?"
According to legend, Valentine was a Roman priest during the third century. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he decreed that young men were forbidden to get married. However, Valentine defied the ruling and continued to perform marriages of young couples in secret. His actions were eventually discovered compelling Claudius to order the priest's death. While in prison awaiting death, Valentine fell in love with a young woman, believed to be the jailer's daughter, who visited him regularly. Before his execution, it is alleged that Valentine wrote the young woman a note which he signed "from your Valentine."
"I guess so."
"In what sense?"
"Most of the time."
"Who, me?"
Correct answer -- "Of course, dear."
Question: "What are you thinking about?"
"Football."
"My dog."
"I was wondering when the next Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition was going to be available."
Thus, Valentine was put to death and Valentine's Day was born.
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"If I wanted you to know, I'd be talking instead of thinking."
Correct answer -- "I was just thinking about what a wonderful, kind, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to be with you."
Question: "Do you think she's prettier than me?"
"You have a much better personality."
"Only from a certain angle."
"It's hard to say."
"She's just younger and thinner."
Correct answer -- "Absolutely not, dear."
Question: "Do I look fat in this dress?"
"I wouldn't exactly call it fat – it's more like pleasantly plump."
"Nobody will notice."
"Compared to what?"
"Don't worry about it – a little extra weight looks good on you."
Correct answer -- "No, of course not, darling."
The key to a blissful relationship is sincerity -if you can fake sincerity, your relationship will endure. Bret Burquest was a computer programmer and manager for various companies in Minneapolis and Los Angeles for 30+ years. He is also a former award-winning newspaper columnist and the author of 11 books. He currently resides in reclusive splendor on a dirt road in the Land of Ark, near Salem, with a few goofy dogs and an imaginary girlfriend named Tequila Mockingbird. 2
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? Question Mark Magazine Vol. 2 No. 2, February, 2016 Published by TigerEye Publications P.O. Box 6382 Springdale, AR 72766 E: cybermouth@hotmail.com Copyright 2016, Rick Baber Question Mark (?) Magazine is electronically published monthly, free to online subscribers, by TigerEye Publications, through ISSUU.com
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February 2016 * Volume 2 * Issue 2
CONTENTS Bret Burquest with some important tips for Valentine’s Day Page 1 Hey! Tough Guy, you’re no James Dean
Page 4
Angelia Roberts with a touching tribute to a judge.
Page 9 Who is there to love? Starra Dotson
Page 10 Cover Story
Zach Mann with some really helpful tips for traveling to Europe
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? Magazine February, 2016 YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO GET
February 2016 * Volume 2 * Issue 2
CONTENTS
Beth Arnold takes a drive down south and shares her images with us. “Drive-by shooting”
Page 22 New contributor, Annie Hughes lives in Mexico, and travels to Spain. Beautiful!
Parting words on the state of stuff at the moment.
Page 51 ABOUT OUR NOVEMBER COVER
“Spain – tell me Moor”
Page 34
Our friends at Avenues Magazine share a luv story for Valentine’s Day
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? Magazine February, 2016 YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO GET
? was a side of the experienced judge few people would rarely see. Knowing that, I couldn’t take my eyes off the scene playing out before me. For a moment, it was a flashback to my own life when I angrily ventured out with four small kids in tow. “Stay,” I kept saying to myself, “Just stay.”
When Love Dies Angelia Roberts The young husband appeared heart-broken, defeated, and judging from the body language of his soon-to-be ex-wife she was angry and ready to move ahead. With a career more behind than in front of him, the weathered judge had seen too many of these irreconcilable divorce cases. Toss in child abuse, land disputes, and every other kind of file that landed before him and he could write books on what and what not to do. He was known to be tough and I expected no sympathy from him as he glanced at the paperwork needing his decision. I was the only spectator in the courtroom and getting impatient. “Get on with it,” I thought, knowing it was the last one on the docket. He closed their file and told them he would like a few minutes “off the record.” I watched as he moved from his decision-making position and stood before them in his judicial robe looking more like he was ready to perform a wedding ceremony than grant a divorce. His voice was kind and caring when he asked if there was any way they could work it out. After all, he told them, they had small children and there was a lot at stake. It was a rare moment. This man was notorious for keeping an iron-clad grip on his courtroom and this
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The judge’s questioning had thrown their purpose off momentarily. The husband looked to the wife for direction. There was no denying he wanted another chance, but she stood defiant. From my own experiences, I knew: They were standing in their life-changing moment. I looked inward and recalled my many instances that affected not only me but the people I loved. I was once a carbon copy of the young woman standing before the judge and had cloaked myself in pride and anger refusing to back down. Tears for them, tears for me, and tears for everyone else who couldn’t or wouldn’t find the necessary tools to stay the course and rebuild what had been destroyed were running down my cheeks. I have carried that scene in my heart and head for years and wondered what roads they have traveled. Did they find happiness, contentment, or wish they could step back to that moment and reverse their decision? Not too long ago, that same courtroom was filled to capacity as members of the community gathered to pay their respects to that same judge. A large portrait of him was placed behind the podium and it seemed only fitting he would preside over his memorial service just like he had presided over everything else in his life. Story after story was told, in the never-ending tales of the complex man who had in some way touched all our lives. But my account would have been different. I will never forget him leaving his judicial hat on the bench and attempting to steer that young couple toward a reconciliation. As I sat in that packed room and looked at his familiar face I wiped tears once again and couldn’t help but think back to the day when love officially died.
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Be Mine Starra Dotson
Valentine’s Day is a lot of pressure, when it should be a time to reflect on the people that have come, gone, or stuck around. Not one single person is perfect, and if you think about what the people in our lives have to put up with to have us around, they probably really do deserve a present. Despite everything going on in the world, humans give love a shot every day. Every love story is unique and flawed; love and hate are the same thing, everything in between is passion. No relationship is textbook. My parents divorced when I was a newlywed. While they were divorced, my mom didn't date, even though my dad remarried. But they still told each other they loved one another just before my father passed away. My father-in-law passed away suddenly, and 25 years later, my mother-in-law has never been interested in another man. My best friend and her husband needed five years to divorce because they still love each other. Another close friend has married her true love twice. My grandparents wrote to each other every day my grandfather was stationed in the Pacific during WWII. After 40 years of marriage, he counted the days until he joined my grandmother in death. I honestly never thought I would get married. It’s been two daughters and 22 years. There is the love of friends, those important people to turn to when your own people are sick of you. If they are lifelong friends, they’ve seen your ups and downs, taken care of you, listened to you whine. If you have three good friends later in life, count yourself lucky. I have even more. Friends deserve applause, and recognition on Valentine’s Day too. Children should be considered a blessing. If they still love you after they have matured, then you’ve achieved a huge success. Unconditional love in the world barely exists, but it can happen with these 10
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kiddos if you don’t emotionally scar them and suck the ambition out of them. You only get unconditional love by giving it. Show your children they mean the world to you on Valentine’s Day. If you’re an older kid like me, tell your folks you love and appreciate them. If you are a little kid, your teacher will see to it that you recognize your parents with those wonderful homemade Valentines.
If you are fortunate enough to have a significant other, show them all year long that they are your Valentines. Don’t wait until February 14th to give them a card and chocolate. Women love chocolate year round for the most part. We like flowers, dinners, and housekeeping too. Take your kids out of the house for a day. You know that your husband loves your meatloaf and those little special things you do. Put away your smart phones, turn up the music, and pick up playing cards for game night with the kids. On any given day, be kind to one another. Make it a point to ask a stranger how they are doing. Compliment someone randomly to make their day. Unfortunately, a drawback to technology and social media is our retreat into ourselves, less interaction with our peers, and manners thrown out the window. Open a door for a stranger, and say thank you when it’s done for you. Volunteer time, or make an effort to reach out to those in need. Do not expect recognition for a good deed, but simply enjoy the personal reward of helping your fellow man. Tell people you see, “Happy Valentine’s Day,” and feel their reactions. Finally, reflect on the people who broke your heart, stole your heart, and the ones who have passed. Whether you want to admit it or not, they had a hand in the person you are today. Love them or hate them, recognize that once upon a time you were on a road together. February, 2016
Editorial
Even Puppy Monkey Baby beats Beyonce Just like millions of Americans this past Sunday I got caught up in the Superbowl craze. Now granted, it wasn’t my beloved Chicago Bears playing, or my husband’s favorite, the Dallas Cowboys, so it wasn’t quite as much fun as it could have been, but still, there’s nothing quite like 3 hours of football, complete with snacks and really cute commercials. Well, I guess I should say, cute commercials in the PAST. Because not much of anything impressed me THIS year as far as advertising. Seriously. Puppy MONKEY baby? What the heck was up with THAT? And the Doritos commercial with the ultrasound and the idiot father was dumbest thing I’ve ever seen. Even Budweiser disappointed me this year when they didn’t continue with the whole puppy/horse theme. But the absolute WORST was definitely Beyonce’s appearance during halftime. Didn’t they get enough of her two years ago? I have to say, if I was Janet Jackson I’d be pretty ticked off right about now. After all, she had to apologize to the entire nation, and CBS had to fork
over a huge fine after her boob, even covered with a pasty, was “accidently” exposed for 2 milliseconds during the 2004 halftime show. But yet, Beyonce gets to prance all over the field, disparaging law enforcement, dressed in black lingerie and gyrating like a stripper? Seriously? So how come all the folks who were so “offended” over Jackson’s slip, aren’t complaining about this latest sad attempt at entertainment? All I remember hearing in 2004 was how it was a “family” thing to watch the game together and how awful it was for CBS to expose children to this type of scene. Well, apparently nobody has learned a single thing, judging from this year’s show. Whoever is in charge of booking the artists must think the Superbowl is just geared toward single men who’ve consumed large quantities of beer and would love to see a half-naked chick shaking her stuff on the stage. So tell me, what about all the married couples watching the game for their “date” night? What about the men’s fellowship groups at churches across the country watching the game? What about dad’s watching it with their sons? Heck, my 12year old DAUGHTER was watching that game! But, to be 100% honest the attire and content of the performance aren’t the only reason I give that whole lousy performance a thumbs down. Nope, my reasoning was a little more personal. A few years ago, Beyonce went to Lennox Hill Hospital to give birth to her baby, Blueberry Ginsing Pickle Vine, or whatever that poor kid was named. As expected, her and Jay-Z rented a private suite while in the hospital, and brought along their own security. They also had bullet proof glass installed in their room. But do you think it stopped there? Nope. The prima donna also insisted all staff members turn in their cell phones when entering the hospital. She had her security people place tape over all security cameras and to top it off her own security goons stationed themselves at elevators
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Editorial and in waiting rooms, keeping several new parents and their families from seeing their own babies in the NICU. So this year when news stations all over social media started asking the public the next morning what we “thought of the halftime show” I told them exactly what I thought. I will NOT support the music of someone as narcissistic as Beyonce. When asked “why” and I told the whole hospital story, I was then called “racist” for referring to her security staff as “goons.” Apparently Beyonce fans are illiterate as well as stupid, seeing as the definition of “goon” has nothing to do with African Americans, but is 1. A silly, foolish or eccentric person and 2. A bully or thug, hired to terrorize or do away with opposition. So, I’m racist against foolish bullies? Sounds pretty accurate to this chick.
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Adventure
There were several things that surprised me about European travel and several points of advice that I can offer which will save you time and money, should you decide to cross the pond. First and foremost, if you book the trip through an internet source (Expedia in our case), you WILL get the best deal. Be advised that with the “BEST DEAL” there are some things that don’t necessarily transfer into providing the best experiences. As novices in European travel, we learned this the hard way.
The advantage of traveling during the offseason is totally expense related. Because we went in January, not only did we save a lot of money on airfare but we were also able to afford 4 and 5 star hotels within our package which would have been too pricey otherwise. Had I been traveling by myself, I would’ve chosen cheaper hotels and thus lowered the overall price of the package, but, in hindsight, because the locations of the better hotels contributed immensely to the overall experience, I am glad we spent the extra money. For your frame of reference, our package, including airfare and hotel, were slightly over $1800 per person, (this price also included travel insurance which I will address in more detail later). When first we endeavored to take a January vacation, Atlantis in the Caribbean was the focus of our interest. However, as I mentioned in a previous article, the price of Atlantis in the high season gave us pause. In fact, when checking for alternatives, we inadvertently discovered that a trip to Europe would not only be cheaper than Atlantis, but we could also extend our vacation by a full week and still save money. Furthermore, our spirit of adventure was piqued at the prospect of doing more than laying around a sunny beach and sucking down Pina Coladas, (not that there is
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anything wrong with that). We were ready to see the most amazing antiquities of western civilization and hell bent for leather once we saw the price tag.
Of course, when traveling abroad, the first concern is to make certain that you have a viable passport. Mine had been through the washing machine and was due to expire in 6 months so I opted for renewal several weeks in advance. Surprisingly, it took less than three weeks to arrive but this was due to the fact that December is the slow season at the passport office as well, as it usually takes around six weeks. Patty, who had experienced a name change since her last passport issuance had a bit more trouble renewing hers, but luckily, she was able to navigate these troubled waters in sufficient time, though it was a bit too close for comfort.
We over-packed. Don’t do that.
Another reason to not over-pack is simply because you might want to purchase something in Europe which requires space in your luggage for the return trip. People in Europe dress essentially the same as we do, which is casual and comfortable. The most important items to pack are comfortable shoes, phone chargers, conversion plugs, and regular, everyday clothing. As a sidebar, some over-the-counter drugs which are readily available stateside actually require a prescription in Europe. If you are used to taking a particular medication, such as Aleve, take it with you. Don’t bother taking shampoo or other toiletries, as, like the U.S., the hotels provide them. Keep in mind that luggage weight is a VERY IMPORTANT consideration. In addition, take one change of clothing in a carry-on bag. There is a very good chance that your main luggage will get
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Adventure lost in the black hole known as the Amsterdam airport and you are likely not to see it for a couple of days if that happens.
The best way to get Euros is to use your debit card in ATM’s which are readily available everywhere, just like they are here. Notify your bank that you will be using your card abroad and do this several days in advance of your departure. In addition to this, notify your cell phone carrier that you wish to purchase one of their travel packages for the duration of your visit. I chose the $30.00 package from AT&T which allows for unlimited texting, some data, (not enough), and $1.00 per minute overseas calling. By the way, Siri is basically useless when trying to navigate around the close proximity of buildings in Rome or Paris, and she uses a LOT of data. The best advice is to turn off all of the peripheral apps in your phone and use it only for texting and emergencies. Believe it or not, in prehistoric times (before cellphones), people traveled all over the world without cellphones and somehow survived. One other point, sending pictures by cellphone requires the use of data. Do so sparingly.
Expedia (and I’m sure Orbitz and all the others), do offer great deals. Be aware of the length of layovers associated with these great prices. The very best prices usually include long layovers. Airports are notoriously expensive everywhere in the world. You are, after all, a captive audience and have very limited choices. If you don’t mind uncomfortable seating for hours on end and can resist the temptation to fight the boredom with alcohol, it can be a difference of a couple of hundred bucks in the overall trip experience. John
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Grisham saved us a lot of money in this regard. A book, (or two), is a great way to pass the time.
Our trip included, on the outbound side, a twohour layover in Detroit. Visiting the duty free shop and purchasing a bottle of Jim Beam worked out very well. They place it in a sealed bag and you are not allowed to open said bag until you arrive at your final destination. A bottle which would have cost upwards of 20 to 25 dollars here in Nashville was only 16 bucks. Having that bottle helps you resist the mini bar in your hotel room as well as the overpriced hotel bar, and thus, saves you a tremendous amount of cash. Believe me, you will want that cash for other things.
Having layovers that are at least two hours is actually very beneficial because of the time
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Adventure necessary to negotiate customs. The lines can be long and quite time consuming. Also, make certain that you are in the right line when going through, as they are divided by some European logic which, like the jitterbug, completely evades me. We, as I mentioned, entered the European Union via Amsterdam, which is quite typical for people traveling from the U.S. to Europe. This, of course, marks the first time you will be challenged by any language barrier, but, not to any great extent. However, it is here that you actually come to the realization that you aren’t in Kansas anymore. There is an ensuing feeling of vulnerability that a novice international traveler becomes aware of, though it isn’t that big of a deal once you make it through the first time.
We left Detroit for Amsterdam at around 6 p.m. on January 6th and arrived at around 9:30 a.m. local time on January the 7th. It was an 8-hour flight. The aircraft was a Boeing 767-300 and we were seated in the middle row of 5 or so seats. I highly recommend that you pick your seats in advance, as we did, so that you have easy proximity to the aisle and aren’t too far from the lavatory. Try to get to the front of your boarding line so that there will be ample overhead storage available by the time you find your seat. This may sound like a small thing, but fighting with your carry-ons between your feet for 8 hours when you’d rather be sleeping is a pain in the ass. Not nearly as great of an annoyance, though, as being seated within fifty feet of a screaming, suffering, small child. The only reprieve is the in-flight movies available with the volume turned up ALL THE WAY. Bring your own earphones for the flight as they are much better than the ones that the airlines provides.
Just how bad could the food be in a Netherlands
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prison? I doubt that it would be much less satisfying than that on Delta’s Amsterdam flight. Your own excitement about the trip ahead contributes to not being able to get any sleep, probably even as much as the children you’ve eviscerated in the laboratory while their carefree mothers were napping while no one else could. You take comfort in the knowledge that the violent flushing of an airplane toilet makes so much noise that no one could possibly have heard the crying, especially with the inflight movie turned up so loud. In your mind, you know for a fact that you are not the only person on the plane considering these options. The long and short of it is that you arrive very tired. The best advice I can give you is to stay up later and sleep later for the two weeks leading up to your trip. The flying babies o-er the Atlantic will appreciate it.
Patty’s luggage was among the first to come around the carousel in Rome and when mine wasn’t one of the next ten or so bags to appear, I knew that my baby-killing karma had caught up with me. Even more troubling was the fact that about a quarter of the people on the flight didn’t get their luggage either, creating a lot of people in the “angry” line. I mentioned this in my column in last month’s issue so I won’t go into detail here but it did cause us to miss our ground transportation to the hotel, which created another debacle. One thing that we didn’t expect was that there was no customs line and consequently no one to stamp our passports. Apparently, once you enter the European Union, you don’t get your passport stamped in each of the countries you visit. We were a bit disappointed by this. In Rome, the signs in the airport have instructions in English as well as Italian, but it was still difficult to figure out exactly where to go. Finally, we hooked up with our shuttle company, of which there were dozens to sift through, and we got loaded like cattle for the journey from the airport into the heart of Rome. We believe that our driver was almost as familiar February, 2016
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Adventure with Rome as we were as he drove around aimlessly looking for the various hotels where he was to drop his passengers off. We rode around for well over an hour before he finally stopped at our hotel (his first stop), which we had already passed at least four times. The next unexpected surprise was that the hotel, though already paid for, required a $600 deposit for incidentals. Typically, this figure is usually no more than $200, and in hindsight, we probably could have protested this amount, but didn’t. We were exhausted.
The hotel we stayed in is called the Palazzo Montemartini, and is well situated in proximity to a lot of great and wonderful things, not the least of which is the central transportation station which includes trains, the subway, and bus station. The
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hotel serves breakfast each morning and, all in all, a pretty good one. If you are an avid coffee drinker, this is your best chance to get decent coffee without paying 4 to 5 Euro ($4.60 to $5.75) per cup, as there are no free refills in Europe. Nearly ALL of the waitpersons we encountered in Europe were male.
Also, keep in mind that wait people are typically paid much more than their American counterparts so you should tip accordingly. Instead of the 20% we tip here in the States, 15% per cent is more the norm in Europe. Most places charge for water, by the way. Food portions are much smaller than here in the U.S. which helps explain why Europeans are so much thinner than we are. There are great options other than full blown restaurants for grabbing food on the go and these will save you lots of money. By the way, always keep a pocketful of change handy. A single Euro is in coin form rather than paper, and you need lots of change for lots of different things, such as subway tickets. Don’t carry a lot of cash around as you are constantly warned about pickpockets. There are lots of other street hustlers around trying to sell you everything from water to umbrellas to selfie sticks. The best thing to do is to totally ignore them, though they are very persistent. Panhandlers are rampant in heavy tourist areas as well. Save yourself a lot a grief and don’t let them engage you in conversation. Once they have you cornered, the only way out is to cough up some cash.
It is typical to see police and soldiers with machine guns all over Rome. Though this is intimidating at first, soon you realize how incredibly safe you feel because of their presence. They are also very friendly and eager to help if you need directions. We never felt even the slightest sense of personal
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Adventure danger while walking about in either Rome or Paris, regardless of what time of day it was. I’m sure there are neighborhoods that aren’t as safe but we never encountered a single hint of any kind of violence. Tourism is, after all, a very important part of Rome and Paris’ economy. I should also mention that we never encountered any rudeness towards us because we are Americans.
allowed us to explore the Eternal City in great depth. Comfortable shoes are a must, as well as appropriate overall attire for the weather conditions. Apparently, Rome gets hot and sticky in the summer months, and extremely crowded. Because we went in January, we didn’t wait in long lines anywhere.
Surprisingly though, the language barrier was much more prevalent in France than it was in Italy.
It would be hard to say that any part of our trip was above and beyond any other. While the Coliseum was absolutely amazing and astounding, so was the Forum. We visited several Basilicas and they too were breathtaking in so many ways. The Vatican, including St. Peter’s Cathedral and the Vatican museum, and of course, the Sistine Chapel were nothing short of astounding. At a point, you realize that you are experiencing sensory overload and have to step back and just breathe, if for no other reason than to gain perspective of just how magnificent it is to even be there. Paris, too, is beyond the scope of any expectations. The architecture alone will leave you speechless. The sense of history at every corner is something that we Americans simply don’t have because our country is so young in comparison. And then there is the Louvre, mankind’s greatest tribute to itself anywhere on the planet. Both Rome and Paris are living, breathing, highly functioning cities that have been there for literally thousands of years and through all kinds of machinations. Every time you turn a corner, another part of history reveals itself to you in the most unexpected ways. Antiquity is everywhere.
I am not one for guided tours, but Patty’s idea about taking a hop-on, hop off bus tour was a great plan. The double-decker buses furnish you with an audio guide in English which gives you a great overview of all there is to see. Do this early on and it will help you plan out the rest of your activities for your stay. Rome is an extremely walkable city. We averaged about eight miles per day which
As I stated at the beginning of this article, we learned a lot on this trip and the next time we visit Europe there a few things we will no doubt do differently. First and foremost, we will only purchase flights to Amsterdam and forego flying anywhere else. Trains and buses will get you anywhere you want to go with ease all over Europe, providing you don’t over pack. We only
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Adventure experienced one night on the town in Amsterdam and will want at least three nights there the next time, if not more. The language barrier there is almost non-existent and the people are very warm and friendly. As the bouncer at the “smokey” bar explained:
all of your preconceived notions about how Europeans react to Americans at home. They were absolutely wonderfully hospitable everywhere we went with zero exceptions. We in this country could take lessons on tolerance from Europeans. At least once in your lifetime, take a trip to Europe.
In addition to the party, Amsterdam too is full of European history and fantastic architecture... (and a little extra advice),
If you like to drink beer, buy it at the grocery store and not in the bars or restaurants. It’s a dollar- per at the market and five times that on the town. There really isn’t a lot of nightlife in Rome, (at least in January), but Paris rocks into the night. Leave
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Adventure
Drive-by Shooting Beth Arnold
AFTER YEARS AWAY from the United States, when my husband and I returned from France I realized I had to find my way again in the country that used to be my home. I approached it like I would when travelling to any other new place in the world that I wanted to get a bead on. I needed to put my feet on the ground. Talk to people. Drive through the countryside and see what the cities, towns, and holes-in-the-wall looked like and how they were getting along inside themselves and with the bigger world.
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Adventure We first did this in the American West. I could sense the invisible, ancient ones in the mountains and calling out in the sunrises, imploring us to pay attention to the natural world we saw around us. And so as my husband drove, I began snapping pictures of interesting and beautiful images that presented themselves to me, vignettes made of light, angles, buildings, rivers, highways, mountains, forest, lakes, skies, and clouds. Sometimes I rolled down the window, sometimes not. I was amazed that I could capture scenes, moments, that in another second would be gone. Recently, as we drove through the Arkansas and Mississippi Delta on a trip to visit family, I found that the big skies and flat land insisted that I pay attention to them. What I felt was the loneliness and desolation that had always been in this poor region of the United States, though somehow it had grown more so since we’d left. Little towns that never had much of a chance seemed more down and out. How were they hanging on? Who lived there now? How long had their families owned that land? How many had been sharecroppers? How far do they have to drive to buy a loaf of bread, since their Main Street is likely dead?
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Once, there was an island. Curled in the warm Caribbean waters it slept like a bright green iguana in the sun. Houses were tucked against the hillsides as colorful as Easter eggs – pink and yellow and turquoise. Others stilted out over the water and swayed in the wind. The white dusty roads of town were beaten smooth by the broad bare feet of women in bright print cotton dresses who walked in the shade of cheap umbrellas and broad-brimmed hats. They carried faded string bags filled with rice, beans, lard, flour, yucca, plantains and fish. Fish hauled in by the strong black arms of fathers and sons out in their boats. Further out, shrimp boats stretched their wide arms and lowered nets into the navy depths. At noon the schools and markets would empty. Everyone went home for a big meal followed by a siesta. Restless children would play in the shade of palm groves while adults lazed in hammocks. Drowsing geckos would lose their grip and fall into unsuspecting laps. Mangy dogs dug nests in the cool sand under houses and nipped at sand fleas. Bees hummed around the nodding heads of crimson hibiscus while mosquitoes buzzed around the heads of drowsy islanders. Their song combined with the thrum of the surf to create a soothing lullaby. At two everyone went back to work and school. At four the streets filled with children freed from the stifling schoolrooms. They swarmed into bodegas for a jack or a soda in a small plastic bag with a straw. From there they raced home to shed the itchy uniforms and bathe in the sea; laughing and splashing they dove and played like a pod of dolphins. And then the rains came. Note from Publisher: Way back in the dark days of 2011, when TigerEye was just getting started, the first person I approached was a lady I had never (and still haven’t) met in person. Hannah Hanszen was a “friend” from a writer’s site many years before, who so impressed me with her mastery of words that I knew she had to be part of this venture. After a bit of begging on my part, she agreed, and wrote this book. Now, she lives in Mexico, and travels the world – living the life that many of us only dream of. And now, she goes by her real name, Annie Hughes. So all these years later, I’ve tracked her down to beg her to write again, for Question Mark. And she agreed. I am a happy man!
Overcoming our Objectives By Hannah Hanszen
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Anni eHughes
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I read an article in Mexico Daily News today proclaiming more than just beach vacations awaited those who traveled to Mexico. Unfortunately, it became a basic list of other geographic locations one might visit, (mountains, colonial cities, ruins), rather than an exploration of what experiences these vacations might offer. The opportunity for new and unexpected experiences are not limited by location but by the ideas and expectations of the traveler.
This redirection deepened my experience and stimulated my already inquisitive nature. It provided fodder for great conversations with D and with locals in every city and made me realize that Spain is very much about the synthesis of many disparate cultures and ideas. You find this synthesis in everything from food to music, art, architecture and languages. The Visigoths, Romans, Jews and Moors laid down foundations that were then built on (literally and metaphorically) by the Christian Spaniards. The Galicians, Basques, and Catalans have influenced the language and culture throughout Northern Spain and still rigorously maintain their individual cultures. Everywhere you look, everything you do or eat carries a regional and national history within it.
My friend D and I spent a month traveling through Spain together and yet I know we were on very different journeys. Prior to meeting up in San Sebastian/Donostia on the northern coast of Spain she had spent a month completing the pilgrimage of Santiago de Campostela and exploring the northern caminos. I had spent a week of art, architecture and tapas in Madrid and Salamanca. When we came together, her journey remained a spiritual/religious one and I followed her through a number of churches in every city we visited. Fortunately, in Spain the churches are: filled with art, display some of the finest examples of architectural styles, and reflect the social and cultural norms of their time thus fulfilling my secular needs as well. Not surprisingly after so many churches, especially the Sagrada Familia basilica in Barcelona, my thoughts began to turn to the historical impact of religion in Spain and to the spiritual aspects of my own journey.
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Adventure But first, Food! Of course tapas are the favorite way to eat in Spain. These snacks or appetizers can be hot or cold, on bread or skewers or individual items like olives or stuffed eggs or slices of ham or sausage and cheeses. In the north they are called pinxotes (pinchos) and incorporate a lot of fresh or salted seafood. Specialty items are usually listed on a blackboard and are made to order while cold items are frequently displayed on the bar. Many tapas bars have restaurants upstairs, downstairs or in the back where you can have a full meal. Each region has their own cuisines worth exploring. Along the coast the fried calamari sandwiches abound as well as cured and fresh anchovies, cod and octopus. The Galician style octopus is boiled and then served in olive oil with liberal amounts of paprika and sea salt. Galician cuisine also includes many wonderful soups and stews including a caldo gallego with white beans or Caldeirada, a seafood stew. Statistics show that Basques spend more than twice the amount of their disposable income on food than we do in the USA. These people know their food!! From seafood delights like Porrusalda - potato, leek, salt cod soup and Marmitako - tuna with potato and pepper stew to spicy Piperrada Sauteed peppers (they use lots of peppers), onions, garlic and tomato, often served with a fried egg. But it’s not just seafood; grilled meats and game birds, toloso bean dishes and sheep’s milk cheese grace the Basque tables as well. Prominent in Barcelona is the Catalan cuisine. You will not find bread and butter here, but rather bread served with finely chopped tomatoes in olive oils and salt. This is a breakfast favorite throughout Spain. Large wild mushrooms and large sweet green onions called Calcots are favorites of Catalan cuisine. The Calots are charred on an open flame and then dipped in a spicy romesco sauce (a finely ground mixture of tomatoes, peppers, onions, garlic, almonds and olive oil) and consumed voraciously when in season. The Catalan version of Paella is made with vermicelli noodles instead of rice and without saffron. The rice and saffron version of paella was
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made famous in Valencia and some believe that is the only place to eat it. These days I believe you can enjoy good Paella in many restaurants throughout Spain. Wild game is the pride of Toledo, especially partridge, but throughout Spain the real star (and obsession) is pork. The variety of ham seems infinite and it appears in almost every dish and is certainly welcome; sausages, black pork from black Iberian pigs and what they call bacon but is more like prosciutto. While rarely served with a meal vegetables can be ordered separately in most restaurants. Eggplant, artichokes, green beans and mushrooms are your best bet. Rabo de Toro is another specialty seen all over Spain but try to get a recommendation because it ranges from sublime to inedible! We encountered both. This dish of braised bull tail can be so rich and tender and flavorful as to make one sing!
Speaking of singing - let’s talk about the music of Spain. In our cathedral tours one of the most outstanding features were the double organs found in most of the larger Gothic and Baroque ones. Recordings of the organs play in some of the cathedrals and we actually caught the end of a single organ concert in a small church in San Sebastian. The recordings at the Sagrada Familia are particularly beautiful filling the vast space along with the deep jewel tone colors of the stained
February, 2016
Adventure dancing and singing and guitars. We went to a 2 hour performance in a small cabaret, El Gallo, and I swear it was so intense and beautiful and alive I believe it altered my DNA and raised my normal body temperature by a full degree. I honestly had no idea just how fast and passionate and funny and balanced a performance could be. The interplay between the singers, dancers and guitarist was a dance within itself. A performance of perfect choreography and wild improv brought shouts from the audience as lusty as those at a bullfight! Brava, Ole! While there is a lot of Flamenco going on in Sevilla (and all over the south) it was definitely worth the extra money to see the best.
glass windows. Also in Barcelona is the Palace of Catalan Music which is an architectural masterpiece worth taking the tour even if you do not plan to attend a concert there. This is a complete celebration of music in all of its many styles and forms with every detail (and there are many) of the art nouveau space designed to inspire, uplift and enhance the music experience for performers and audience alike. The big cities abound with clubs and concerts to satisfy every preference. As you move into southern Spain the guitar takes center stage. Paco Seco, who runs the guitar school and center in Ronda, gives wonderful concerts twice each evening and displays a large collection of custom guitars and other instruments from around the world and through the ages. He is an accomplished guitarist and presents an exciting program of Spanish music, including his own compositions. For me the trip to Spain had to include a trip to Sevilla and a night of Flamenco
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And then there is the art. This is a hard one to take on because it is so subjective by nature. Of course the Prado and many of the other museums and churches feature works by famous Italian, French and Flemish artists but I chose to focus on the Spanish artists. I was already somewhat familiar with Valazquez, El Greco, Goya and Picasso but discovered Zurbaran, Murillo, Cotan, and Ribera wow. Every church is filled with paintings and carvings and sculptures. Eventually I went into art overload. We began a contest called the “Gold-Off” where we photographed the most ornate chapels and parts of the cathedrals to see who could find the most gilding. Every time we thought we’d found a sure winner we went into another church and discovered we had been naive! In the end, the alter pieces of the main chapels of the Cathedrals in Toledo and Sevilla tied, though I feel Toledo won by a carat.
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And the architecture in Spain is so beautiful, from the Romanesque and Visigoth monuments in the north to the 13th century Gothic cathedrals in Toledo and Leon; the Spanish renaissance style of the University of Salamance and the Baroque found in Juan Herrera’s El Escorial or the Cathedral of Santiago de Campostela. 19th century architecture flourished with the Art Nouveau designs of Montaner and the Modernists Gaudi and Cadafalch and 20th century Rafael Moneo. Most of the large cathedrals were built over many decades, some for more than 100 years, and so incorporate elements of Romanesque, Gothic and Baroque architecture. I have left the Moors and Moorish architecture
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Adventure separate and last because seeing the Alhambra, a dream of mine, was a major element in my shift from tourist to pilgrim in my own right.
The Moors were in Spain for over 700 years and their ideas and advancements spread throughout Europe. Literature, romantic poetry, music, mathematics, astronomy and architecture were greatly appreciated and practiced in Moorish Spain. The architecture was different in many ways from the traditional architecture of North Africa and became known as the Caliphal style. In some areas Mozrabe (Christians living in Muslim territories) architecture is a combination of the Visigoth and caliphal styles. Following the re-conquest of Spain in the 1490s there came the Mudejar style which combined traditional Moorish architecture with Romanesque and Gothic elements. But nowhere is the combining of elements more blatant - and disturbing - than in the great mosque or Mezquita/Cathedral in Cordoba. Here a large cathedral had been constructed directly inside of the 2nd largest mosque in the world which was constructed on top of a Visigoth church! Under keyhole arches are paintings of saints and altars. The Alcazar, or palace, in Sevilla is designed in the Mudejar style to resemble the Alhambra but with a large chapel and many other Christian and Western references. It is still used by the royal family when they are in Sevilla.
fort and beautiful gardens. Within the palace were spaces for living, working, and praying - yet every surface is covered in colorful references to nature or written poetry or prayers. There are fountains everywhere and music was played throughout. God and man and nature inhabited this space together and at no time were separate from one another. The use of Algebra in the design of the structure using perfect rectangles of increasing size and perfectly aligned arches and reflective ponds create a space which seems much larger than it is and sense of balance that is awe inspiring. It is from this idea of inseparable elements that I took another look at Spain and found a deeper appreciation for all that I had seen and experienced. I have begun to incorporate elements of the trip; recipes and artwork, a book called “Reading the Alhambra” and a cd of flamenco music, into my life at home. And isn’t that the best thing about travel?!
But when it comes to the idea of synthesis or incorporation the Alhambra is the perfect metaphor. Within these walls is a city, a palace, a
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That’s right, we’re in Arkansas – The Natural State – used to be known as The Land of Opportunity, and The Diamond State, but now is just plain ol’ The Natural State. We publish in Northwest Arkansas. Our friends at Areawide Media, who publish Avenues, are located in the northeast part
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of the state – and they’re a lot nicer than we are. So if you live in Northeast Arkansas, or have any interest in the goings-on there, check them out! To give you a taste, the following story is published in the February, 2016 edition of Avenues. Enjoy!
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Love on the farm By Tammy Curtis Photos Submitted
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t has often been said love is found in strange places. Nothing could be more true than the non-typical romance and engagement of Lindsay Huffmaster and Chase DeJournett. What began as pranks in two different homes less than a half hour apart, led to an engagement ... two years later. Lindsey Huffmaster of Williford, explained she and her mother often play pranks on one another. Her brother John said she had just graduated and was home alone sad, and didn’t have a boyfriend. Lindsey said her mom created a profile on FarmersOnly.com, an online dating site for people from the country. Within a few days a man who would one day become her husband, was also pranked for very similar reasons by his brother. Lindsey said within a few weeks, Chase added her on Facebook because they had mutual friends and he had seen she lived nearby and also showed cattle. The photo her mother had uploaded to Farmers Only was also her Facebook profile picture. “I was at the National Western
From AVENUES • February, 2016
Stock Show in Denver and seen Chase and wondered why he wasn’t sending me any messages,” she said. She went on to send him one and told him her name. She laughed and said a week later the two met for the first time at the post office in Hardy. “It is going to be highly questionable when you meet someone that way what they will be like,” she said, so she did not go alone. “We hit if off right away. He lived at Imboden. We spent every day together the first week. It was weird because he knew Casey, my sister,” she said. When the couple went on their first date, Lindsey said she was so nervous because he had no idea she was diabetic and had to take eight shots a day and check her blood sugar. “I was worried what he would think when he had to see me check my sugar. On the second date, he had a box of soda and food in the back seat for me in case my blood sugar dropped,” she said, explaining how much that meant to her. Laughing she said she and her mom have talked about it a lot since and truly believed it was one of those “meant to be situations.” Chase finally sprung the question on her birthday last September, after Lindsey had spent a week in the hospital in intensive care for complications from her diabetes. When she got home from work, she said everything was normal. Chase was shooting his bow and told her they were going to go to his grandparents, James and Georgia Ratliff’s house. She got ready and when they pulled in the yard, Lindsey said there was a lot of cars. “I just thought, oh they are going to throw me a birthday party.” Chase’s grandmother immediately told Lindsey she had picked up some medicine for her. She admits to thinking it was odd since she had all of her medicine, but thought it might be something the doctor had called in. “Chase came in with a prescription bag and inside was a bottle, I opened it to try to look what kind of medicine it was and my ring was inside,” she said. “He then bent down on his knee and asked me to marry him. He had typed 'Lindsey, will you marry me?’ on the bottle. I thought that was pretty cool for him to think of since I had been sick and all,” she explained. So two years after meeting on Farmer’s Only, the couple will be getting married and beginning their life together on March 13. Lindsey said she is so excited, but admits she is behind in the planning for the big rustic western themed wedding that will have six bridesmaids and six groomsmen. Chase works in maintenance at Sloan Hendrix School and Lindsey works at 1st Choice Healthcare in Pocahontas. The two are excited to begin their lives together. “I know when we get older and have children and grandchildren, they are going ask if we were crazy or just couldn’t find dates,” she said. It is proven that “you don’t have to be lonely at FarmersOnly.com.”
“He had typed ‘Lindsey, wil l you marry me?’ on the bottle.”
Lindsey Huffmaster
From AVENUES • February, 2016
Paperback; 158 pages $9.95 Order HERE From TigerEye Publications
also available at Amazon.com “Insanely funny short stories from and of the Baby Boomer Generation”
Includes: Dinner with WT Ode to a Silver Screen The Great Ice Capades of 1971 The Bus for Smackover Leaves in 15 Minutes 120 Minutes in Hell & more! Reviews: "... I think it is almost certain to become a collector’s item..." -- Amy H. Peterson "A smooth blend of wit, irreverence, nostalgia, and whimsy..." -- Jennifer Koplitz "W.T. serves up a mixture of stories and poems guaranteed to satisfy anyone hungry for homespun humor and charm." -- Hannah Hanszen
.. a full, barbecue buffet of good readin' -- Amy H. Peterson Rick Baber is a man of vision; vision not of the future but a vision of the past. -Jacqueline Anastasia
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