November 2022 Special Needs Living Akron/Canton

Love Needs No Words! Meet 5-year-old Clayton Leitzke

YOUTH FEATURE

WRITTEN BY ANDREA HURR PHOTOS BY JULIAN CURET

He is exactly who he is supposed to be. Clayton is amazing. He is loving and caring and kind.

These wise words are from Brittany Leitzke, mother to son Clayton, age 5. Brittany heard the doctor tell her that Clay has autism, and her brain started spinning. Immediately her eyes welled up, and she tried so hard to hold back the tears. She was feeling overwhelmed and was sad at the thought that her 18-month-old child was going to be facing many more challenges than what the world already throws at you. She says that she’ll never forget how Dr. Weber looked right at her and said, “There’s nothing you did or didn’t do to cause this”; it was as if the doctor could read her mind.

As a parent, when you get a diagnosis such as this, the first thing you do is blame yourself. Brittany says that she doesn’t carry guilt because of that statement. Her doctor also connected her with Help Me Grow, gave her any phone number she could possibly need, and which websites to research with specific phrases to look for. Dr. Weber became an invaluable resource to Brittany and her family.

One of the hardest things for Brittany is that Clayton is nonverbal. He cannot communicate his needs and wants or if he isn’t feeling well, and that can be incredibly frustrating for both her and Clayton. She says, “I think it breaks my heart the most that he can’t communicate basic needs like needing a drink, being hungry, being scared or tired, etc. It just became a guessing game on my part to figure out what he was trying to communicate without being able to say it.” Some of the best advice she has received in terms of Clayton being nonverbal was, “If you are frustrated, just imagine how frustrated Clayton is not being able to tell you.” Currently, Clayton Attends Golden Key for kindergarten, and thanks to them, she can breathe knowing the staff is well trained and knowledgeable on autism, and he receives his therapies there. As Brittany stated, “The entire staff there are godsends.” Brittany also works her schedule around everyone else’s schedule (of people she trusts), so she can make enough money to support Clay and his little sister, Jordan (she is neurotypical). This is a mom who works hard and will do anything to raise awareness and make things happen.

Being in Ohio, most of the year, the weather is a big question mark. When the weather is bad, Clayton doesn’t want to be outside, but he was lacking a space of his own inside, so Brittany got to work. What she thought was going to be a small way to raise a little money to put toward giving Clay a sensory room became an overwhelming show of support. Brittany made a bracelet with the words “Be Kind” on it and one for her friend, and decided to post it on her social media to see if anyone else was interested in getting one. She used primary colors associated with autism and her Be Kind words and thought she’d sell a few to some family.

Well, 217 bracelets later, and her message spread all over the country, she was able to get Clayton his sensory items and create a space just for him. When he’s feeling overwhelmed or overstimulated, he has an area he can go to and calm down. Primarily, she hopes that by doing this, she has made the world a little less scary for her son and says that she will never forget the love and support she felt from so many people.

Brittany is a wonderful example of a devoted mother. Fairly new to Clayton’s autism diagnosis she is spreading awareness and creating the space her son needs to thrive. She loves him fiercely and it shows. Slowly Clayton is progressing and becoming preverbal, where he is starting to communicate a few things. “Every day there is something new” she says and they make sure to recognize and celebrate every achievement whether big or small.

Just because someone is different does not make them less.

Just because Clayton can’t talk, that doesn’t mean he isn’t aware. He is nonverbal, not non-hearing or not non-feeling. She says he is strong and brilliant and expresses pure joy when truly excited about something. He has taught Brittany and their family how to practice patience, to be stronger than they thought was possible and that “love needs no words.” Brittany has learned that not everything will go as planned, and that’s OK. It’s OK to not be able to do everything yourself and OK to want to take a break. It’s OK to ask for help and OK to say you’re not OK when someone asks. We need to always remember that everyone has something going on, and there is no room to judge, rather we need to have some understanding that someone may be struggling and see if you can help.