faith hope love
The Bachelor & Bachelor Pad’s
Handling Heartbreak & Holding Onto Her Beliefs Chris Byrd
Two-time Heavyweight Champion and Olympic Silver Medalist Boxer Rich Stearns
The Heart-Stirring Story of the Man Behind World Vision Rosaria Butterfield
Leaving a Lesbian Lifestyle to Follow the Lord Summer 2013
$6.95 USA • $7.50 Canada
The
Bachelor’s
contents
interviews
>>
06 Jeremy Sieverts
A Player and a Coach: Major League Lacrosse All-Star Embraces Both Roles
14 World Vision’s Rich Stearns
Self-Reliance Made Him Strong, But Surrendering Gave Him Significance
22 The Bachelor’s Tenley Molzahn
Reality TV Experience Helps Her Get Through Rough Times
30 David Dwyer
From Microsoft to the Mission Field
36 Astronaut David Hilmers
From Space Missions to the Medical Field: “It’s Never too Late to Live Out Your Dreams”
40 Heavyweight Champion Chris Byrd Who’s in Your Corner?
44 Peter Hitchens
The Brother of Atheist Christopher Hitchens Speaks Out About God
48 Dr. Henry Cloud
The Freedom of Boundaries
departments
summer 2013
>>
Miracle 52
Rosaria Butterfield A Most Unlikely Convert
Expressions 60
Q-5
31 Bits
Bikes and Beads Lead to Business and a Better Life
64
“42” Jackie Robinson
66
The Great Gatsby
68
Iron Man 3
70
Star Trek Into Darkness
Harrison Ford & Chadwick Boseman Leonardo DiCaprio & Carey Mulligan Gwyneth Paltrow & Sir Ben Kingsley Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto & Zoe Saldana
Sound 73
Muisc Notes
Atlas Genius, Cold War Kids, Dido, Foals
Editor’s Note I love it when I come across an individual whose character and integrity match his career choice… or in this case, the mission of the ministry that God hand-picked him to run. The man is Rich Stearns; the organization is World Vision. His personal story of coming to faith, attacking global poverty while still caring for the individual, and the challenge he has for each of us to use our abilities to bring glory to God is not only inspiring, but a much needed message often lost in the increasing clutter of today’s technology. Let’s simplify and talk about a sport dating back as early as the 12th century AD, and even with that longevity, lacrosse is still a sport unfamiliar to many people, especially on the West Coast. I’ll admit prior to this year I didn’t know much about this contact game played with long-handled sticks and a small rubber ball, let alone its Native American origins. But thanks to Major League Lacrosse All-Star Jeremy Sieverts and playerturned-coach Paul Richardson, it has quickly grown to become one of my favorite sports to watch. However, I’m not sure any sport will be able to surpass the way I feel about baseball, from the nostalgic way the game can transport you back to your youth, to the smell of the grass and history it carries with our country. Which is why I enjoyed talking with Harrison Ford and Chadwick Boseman about the late Jackie Robinson and his Christian roots. Summer is here and I hope this issue provides an encouraging script to an afternoon of leisure.
Lacrosse interview and photoshoot team: (l-r) Henry Ortlip, Paul Richardson, Jeremy Sieverts, Kelli Gillespie, Rob Springer, & Cristina Lopez.
Kelli Gillespie Editor-in-Chief
04 Risen Magazine
PUBLISHER :: Allan Camaisa EDITORIAL EDITOR-IN-CHIEF : Kelli Gillespie CONTRIBUTING WRITERS : Mei Ling Starkey, Henry Ortlip, Samantha Baer, Chris Ahrens Kelli Gillespie, Nikki Jimenez COPY EDITOR: Patti Gillespie INTERN: Cristina Lopez
ART ART DIRECTOR :: Rob Springer CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS :: Henry Ortlip, Rob Springer, Aaron Young, Howard Schalz, Mail On Sunday, Jimmy Williams, Neil Boyd Photography, Trever Hoehne, Kristin Arnesen
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The views and opinions expressed by the subjects interviewed are not necessarily those shared by the publisher or staff of Risen Media, LLC. All interviews remain the sole property of Risen Magazine. All rights reserved. No part of the contents of this magazine may be reproduced without the written consent of Risen Media, LLC. Copyright © 2013 “Risen” is a Trademark of Risen Media, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Cover Photo :: Trever Hoehne, www.treverhoehne.com risenmagazine.com 05
A PLAYER AND A COACH
MAJOR LEAGUE LACROSSE ALL-STAR
Embraces PLAYER Both COACH Roles A
AND A
MAJOR LEAGUE LACROSSE ALL-STAR
Writer: Kelli Gillespie Photographer: Rob Springer
ife isn’t always what you expect it to be, and how you manage those unpredicted expectations can oftentimes be the difference between sweet success, and devastating defeat. On and off the field professional lacrosse player Jeremy Sieverts has lived out this valuable lesson. From being a high school state champion, to having his college program disbanded, sitting the sidelines, and starting in the pros, his story is one centered on support and prayer. Risen spent a day with this Major League Lacrosse All-Star to learn more about the sport, his off-season coaching, and how there is no substitute for hard work.
Interviewed Exclusively for Risen Magazine at Santa Fe Christian High School in Solana Beach, California
Embraces Both Roles hockey, but you play on a field the same size as for soccer. I think what makes
Risen Magazine: Growing up in Maryland, you started playing lacrosse at very early age. How did you get into it? Jeremy Sieverts: I started playing when I was about four or five years old. My dad played. Baltimore is a hot bed for lacrosse so I grew up playing lacrosse and soccer. I didn’t know which sport I liked more, but I was always a bit better in playing lacrosse than I was at soccer. I just always loved the different dynamics of the sport and the physicality of it – the stick work, shooting and everything like that. As I got into high school I realized [lacrosse] is what I wanted to play in college and pursued it.
RM: What was your family like growing up? Were they supportive, did you have siblings that played? JS: Absolutely, my parents are certainly supportive of anything I do really. But my dad, like I said, also played lacrosse. I have an older sister, Jenna, two years older, and we probably couldn’t be more different. She’s not really into sports. I remember when I was younger my dad would go to two soccer games in the morning, a lacrosse game at night and maybe a Caps game [NHL’s Washington Capitals] or something. We would be running around all day Saturday to different sporting events.
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RM Why is lacrosse so exciting and how did it capture your heart? JS: I think the coolest thing about lacrosse is that it combines a lot of different aspects of a lot of other sports. It has the physicality of football and
lacrosse so unique is that you have a stick that is yours – you can personalize it pretty much however you want, you can string it however you want, make it throw however you want – and [that stick] is really an extension of your own self. It’s very unique in that aspect and there is no other sport like that. [Also] just the different type of athlete you have to be – a lot of the movements in a half-field offense are a lot like basketball, but again, you have to get up-and-down the field like a soccer player. So there is a lot of agility, but also the longer running you have to be able to do as well. Lacrosse requires this combination of athleticism that makes it different than the other sports. RM: Lacrosse is still a fairly new sport to the West Coast. Being from Maryland, was becoming a professional lacrosse player always at the top of your list? JS: When I was younger there wasn’t a professional league. The league has only been around for about 13 years. So my dream was to play in college. And once I was able to play in college then playing professionally certainly became something I wanted to work towards. I just kind of stuck with it for a couple of years until I got the opportunity and my chance to play in the league. RM: You can’t really get a better high school experience than having your team ranked #1 and being state champions. What is a favorite memory risenmagazine.com 07
08 Risen Magazine
A PLAYER AND A COACH
MAJOR LEAGUE LACROSSE ALLfrom those few years of playing? JS: My senior year we had a great team. We were fortunate enough to be coached by our high school coach since we all were probably about 10 years old. His son was a couple years younger and always played with us. Because this group of us grew up playing together, by my senior year we had a great team. We ended up with a record of 22-1, and won the MIA Championship. It was just an unbelievable way to cap off my high school career. It was a great memory being on the field as the clock ran down and we were up by a goal. It’s something I will never forget.
ing toward going professional, was it prayer, mentors, or what that helped get you through? JS: A combination of all. Obviously a lot of times I think you’re not really sure what the next step is but I learned, especially recently, that the Lord doesn’t give us the whole picture. He gives us one step at a time. And when that door opens, you walk through that door, and if it’s not the right thing you turn and walk away from it. I continue to learn daily and those were a lot of lessons I especially learned going through transferring from Butler to Maryland, and then after college.
RM: You go on to play at Butler University which ends up cancelling their lacrosse program; what happened? JS: I really felt I could be a part of the rebuilding of Butler’s program. I think I was pretty high on Coach Ross’ [Men’s head coach at Bulter at the time] radar and felt very comfortable with him and the other coaches there. I just really wanted to be part of something special and turn the program around. Unfortunately, as a result of lack of finances and budgeting they decided to cut off our program in January of my sophomore year. Then I transferred to [University of ] Maryland… certainly a big step up from Butler, and another step along the way to my career in Maryland.
RM: Looking at your pro career so far and guessing it’s not exactly how you envisioned it, being drafted, not playing for a year, being traded and then exploding last year with honors including being named 2012 MLL All Star, MLL Most Improved Player and making the US Men’s National Team, what kept you motivated? What kept you focused and looking for that one opportunity to show your stuff? JS: I definitely thought that maybe I should kind of pack it in and just play Men’s Club Ball, and just enjoy that. But there’s something about it I guess, I just wanted to be a part of it and I knew if I got an opportunity, it would work out for me. And fortunately, Tony Seaman, the General Manager for the [Denver] Outlaws was looking out for me and picked me up in a trade. At this time last year, I was just hoping I would get to dress and play in the first game for the Outlaws. I had really no idea of what was going to happen. I felt like there were pretty high expectations for me. I went from a team that wasn’t going to keep me on their team at the end of the season, to getting traded for a high profile player and getting protected by the Outlaws; so there was a little bit of pressure faced there. But last summer, my performance on the field went far beyond anything I could have imagined or dreamed. Like you said, I played in three games prior to that over the course of two years, had a few points; but then last year just blew up. Fortunately, I have great teammates and unselfish guys and I really felt an important piece of the puzzle for the Outlaw’s success.
think the coolest thing about lacrosse is that it combines a lot of different Embraces Both Roles aspects of a lot of other sports.
RM: You went from a school with a few thousand students to a school with nearly forty thousand. What did that transition look like? JS: Well it certainly was a different end of the spectrum as far as college experiences go; moving from a small school in the Midwest, to a big school in Maryland, and even though I had lived in Maryland, I had only been down [to the university area] a handful of times. But the transition period was very quick. I basically decided to go to University of Maryland on a Sunday night, flew home on that Wednesday, and was in class on Thursday at Maryland. Kind of a wild time as far as transitions goes. But the coaches and my teammates in Maryland were great during that period helping get my feet under me on campus with new classes, and everything like that.
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RM: How are you typically when it comes to handling change, and stress? JS: I kind of didn’t know what to expect. Now, looking back when I think about it, man, I definitely went through a lot. But I just kind of rolled with it and tried to keep it all in perspective and understand [that] it’s just another step in the process of my life. RM: From lacrosse, to school, to your personal life, what role has a relationship with God played? JS: I have been very blessed to be raised in a Christian home. My parents took my sister and me to church since we were young. Probably the coolest thing for me has been Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Just being able to combine lacrosse and my faith is something that has been huge in my walk as far as my relationship with God and building relationships with other people that have same faith background as I do. RM: When you were going through this transition time of schools and work-
RM: How do you maintain a healthy mindset balance? JS: I think trying to stay humble as much as I can. You hear people all the time say that the two hardest things to handle are failure and success and I’m in a very different position this year than I was last year, but it doesn’t mean it’s any easier. I think this [upcoming] season will be very different. I’m not going to surprise anyone so I’ll be on everyone’s radar and that just presents another challenge. I’m certainly looking forward to it and getting back out there with my teammates.
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Rich Stearns holds sponsored girl, Nathaly, 3, on his lap, in Tiraque, Bolivia.
Self-Reliance Made Him Strong, But Surrendering Gave Him Significance
World Vision’s
Rich Stearns Writer: Kelli Gillespie Photographer: Jon Warren
e grew up wanting to be the complete opposite of his father, he didn’t want to follow God, and certainly didn’t want to be the President of World Vision… but it’s not about what Rich Stearns wanted, and fortunately, he says, he figured that out. This Cornell-educated husband and father of five, is finding success in service. Risen sat down with a humble and warm Stearns to hear more about his heart for ministry, attacking global poverty, and how his formative years made him the man he is today.
Interviewed Exclusively for Risen Magazine in Seattle, Washington
Risen Magazine: What traits of your upbringing did you either want to flee from or ensure was a mainstay in your life moving forward? Rich Stearns: When I was about ten years old, my world kind of fell apart. My dad was an alcoholic and his drinking led to financial and marital problems. He filed for bankruptcy and the bank foreclosed on our house and evicted us. I can still remember when I was in bed at night and my parents were screaming in the kitchen – my dad had come home drunk and they were having a big fight. I just realized that moment, that my parents couldn’t help me. That I was kind of on my own, and if I didn’t get ahold of my life and take it somewhere, then they wouldn’t be able to help me because they couldn’t get their own life sorted out. And from that day I remember just kind of having this sense of it’s all up to me; I have to make my own way. Literally calculating at ten years old, how when I turned 18, I could leave home and go to college, and that was my escape route. It gave me a trait of self-reliance – which was good in some ways and bad in other ways. I wasn’t going to rely on anybody else because everybody else in my life was letting me down. And that actually became a bit of a problem in me coming to faith because I didn’t want to rely on Jesus; I wanted to rely on myself. I developed a sphere of self-reliance. I did go to Cornell University, then University of Pennsylvania for my MBA, so I kind of realized my dream. The other thing I remember all the way through college was that a lot of men had issues with their dads. They were either living in the shadow of their dad, or they could never please their dad, or whatever it was, there is usually some kind of issue there that young men have to deal with. And for me, it was whatever my dad was; I wanted to be the opposite. He was a role model; but he was a role model in showing me the perfect opposite of what to do. He dropped out of school in the 8th grade; I wanted to get a graduate degree. He had three wives and three divorces; I wanted
to have one wife and the perfect family. He went bankrupt multiple times in business; I wanted to be a success. My dad was a negative role model. He was an alcoholic; I am now sixty-two years old and I have never been drunk in my life. I didn’t have my first beer until I was sixty. Don’t ask me why, it was a rough day. [Laughter] Don’t get me wrong, I love my dad and until the day he died I would call him every week and help him out financially here and there. But he was just a person that was unable to manage his life. I came to not hold that against him, but to actually feel sorry for him. We had a great relationship after I became an adult. RM: With this trait of self-reliance, how and when did you become a Christian? What did faith look like in your life? RS: On April 6, 1973, I got hooked up on a blind date with my (now) wife by her roommate. And all the roommate told me was, “My roommate is this terrible Jesus freak, and she broke up with her boyfriend from high school a couple of months ago and I think it would be great if she went out with a guy like you.” I was a senior, a fraternity guy, a big man on campus and she was a freshman. So anyway this roommate devilishly hooked us up just to see what might happen – you know, this Jesus-freak and fraternity-Casanova. [Laughter] So on the first date, Renee, pulled out of her purse this Campus Crusade tract, The Four Spiritual Laws. And she looked into my eyes said, “God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life.” And I looked right back at her and said, “ You have got to be kidding me?!” And she said, “No, I’m very serious, may I continue?” I said, “Well, I think I know what you are doing. But if you want to continue, go right ahead, take your best shot.” So she took me through the whole booklet, and of course there was this little place where it shows a diagram of a chair. And asks, who’s on the throne in your life? Is it you, or is it God? And I was pretty clear I was on the throne of my life, and I worked pretty hard to be on the throne of my life. So, that was our first date. risenmagazine.com 11
That was really the first serious exposure to faith that I had. I had a roommate before that who was a Christian that worked on me the four years at Cornell, but he didn’t make a lot of headway. And for me it really was this self-reliance. That I am in control of my life, religion is for weakminded people who need a crutch. I don’t need a crutch. I have dealt with every adversity that life has built me and I’ve come out the victor and I’m
something had happened. The next day I went to the bookstore and bought a dozen books and I just started reading everything I could get my hands on about the Christian faith. Over the next three or four months I think I read fifty or sixty books. I did call Renee back and told her what was happening and that I was reading, and that I wasn’t making any commitments. I told her, “It’s either true or it’s false. And if it’s false you’re wasting your time. And I certainly don’t want to waste my time. But if it’s true, it changes everything.” After reading all these books I asked myself a question, “If I had to bet my life, which I do, on whether this is true or false, what do I bet?” And I realized that I would bet that it was true. If I had to bet my life, I thought it was more likely to be true than false and that’s when I realized that I don’t want to live my life as a lie. If I really believe that this is true, then it follows logically that I have to commit to it. So I literally got down on my knees in my room in Philadelphia and I prayed a version of the sinner’s prayer that had been in some of the books I had read. And said, “God, I don’t know what I’m doing and I don’t know what to do next. But I do know this, I want to commit my life to living for you and I need you to help me figure out what that means.” I always tell people that from that day on I never had a doubt about my faith ever again. It just clicked and it felt like I took the leap of faith and God caught me in mid-air. I just never doubted it again. So Renee and I got back together. A year later we got engaged. We married six or eight months after that. And I have been with that woman for 40 years now.
The next day I went to the bookstore and bought a dozen books and I just started reading everything I could get my hands on about the Christian faith. Over the next three
or four months I think I read fifty or sixty books. not going to be one of those people that cling to religion as a crutch. I’m not interested because I don’t need what religion is offering. That was my deal. So when Renee and I started dating, despite our ideological differences, we still fell for each other over the next six or seven months. We carried out a long distance relationship when I graduated. She lived in California, and I lived in New York. That fall I went off to University of Pennsylvania, and she was still at Cornell, so we were about five hours apart. We would see each other a few weekends, but every time faith came up we had a big argument, and a big fight. I didn’t understand why she couldn’t just leave it alone. You believe what you believe, and I’ll believe what I believe. What difference does it make? We love each other. But she kept saying, “ You don’t understand this is the most important thing in my life. And I have to share it with you. And if I can’t share it with you I don’t see how we can have this relationship.” So I gave her an ultimatum one day and said, “Here is the deal. You have to make a choice, is it me, or God? Because, I’m not going to change. I am not going to become a Christian. It’s not going to happen. It would take a miracle. Accept that and make your decision. I think we can have a great relationship if we just respect each others beliefs but you have to decide if you could live that way.” And that’s when she broke up with me and said, “Well, you just made my choice pretty easy. When you put it that way to choose you or God, God wins every time.” So she broke up with me and we were both very brokenhearted because we both had a lot of affection for each other. That sent me for a loop because it was painful, and then set me up for a journey. I then started reading. Maybe a couple months later, I hadn’t talked to her and I was home for Christmas break. I started digging through a box of books I brought home from college to see if there was anything to read and I found, Basic Christianity, by John Stott. It was a book that my high school girlfriend had given me, who was also a Christian. She had written on the flyleaf six years earlier and she said, “I hope you read this book someday. It expresses what I believe better than I could ever do it.” And signed her name. And of course I had never read the book, but I didn’t throw it away, I threw it in a box. That night I started reading Basic Christianity. And I read it cover to cover in one sitting. I finished it at four in the morning and I was trembling because it almost felt like the Holy Spirit had grabbed me and said, “This is the truth.” I was literally shaking when I finished that book, and 12 Risen Magazine
RM: When would you say that your passions started aligning with the Lord’s calling for your life? RS: I guess I would say because I became a Christian from a place of unbelief and as a young adult, not a child, for me the change was much more dramatic. I had lived a life without faith and without God, and without believing in God, so I kind of knew what that had to offer. When I became a Christian I really understood this was an all-in commitment. From that day on I really attempted to make every decision in my life based on my faith. One of the things I talk about in my book, Unfinished, is that so many young people are looking to find that thing that God’s called them to do. One of the principles in the book is that you may be longing for God to put you in the game, “Coach put me in. I really want to go to the front lines. I really want to do something important. I want to join the battle against trafficking. I want to eliminate hunger in our world. I want to do something important that I’m passionate about.” One of the questions I ask is, “If you haven’t been faithful and obedient in the small things in your life, why do you think God will give you a promotion and send you to do something important?” So if you’re not tithing your income, if you’re in a relationship with a non-believer, if you’re violat-
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Rich Stearns joins a chain of volunteers helping to unload World Vision donated medical supplies to aid Hope Hospital in Port au Prince, Haiti, care for earthquake victims.
14 Risen Magazine
Reality TV Experience Helps Her Get Through Rough Times The
Bachelor’s
Writer: Samantha Baer Photographer: Aaron Young
he would never encourage anyone to be on The Bachelor, but for season 14 contestant Tenley Molzahn, the reality television show provided healing from the heartache of her then-recent divorce and a unique avenue for her to deepen her dependence on the Lord. From her early days of dancing for Disney, to living her love life on-screen in the public eye, to her most recent creation of the Sweet and Free Life, Molzahn opens up to Risen in hopes of sharing her strength and to reminding others of the Greatest Love.
d to watch,
Interviewed Exclusively for Risen Magazine in San Diego, California
Risen Magazine: You have had a variety of experiences, and a lot of people know you from The Bachelor and The Bachelor Pad shows. But before we ask about your reality TV experiences, can you give us a glimpse into what your childhood was like? Tenley Molzahn: My childhood was really fun and active. I grew up in Oregon in a small town southwest of Portland by wine country, which is beautiful. It rains a lot so when I moved to California later in life I was ready. I had amazing parents who raised my sister, Karley, and me. They just celebrated 30 years of marriage last August. Growing up, I was always very ambitious, adventurous, and independent – just excited about living life and creating dreams. I did a lot of dream chasing, even when I was three years old I wanted to be an Olympic gymnast and my parents did what they could to get me on that path. So I was a gymnast for years and “retired” from that when I was 12, and that’s when I found, and fell in love with dance. It’s funny in my childhood I kind of took everything seriously and wasn’t given into hobbies, but more so “careers.” Dance was a big thing to me and I traveled a lot on my own. When I was 11 years old I was part of a select group of middle schoolers to go to Japan for a couple weeks and stay with a host family in a really small town. It was a program that gave you the opportunity to experience another culture and merge with other students from a different country, which was great. Now that I think about it, someday being a mom, I can’t even imagine letting my child do that! So growing up, my parents gave me a lot of support, loved me and encouraged me to follow my heart and my dreams – so I did that!
Especially ith so much ppiness...
my way
sy to say,
way.”
RM: Did you grow up as a Christian, and what role did faith play in your upbringing? TM: I was probably three years old when I asked Jesus to be a part of my life. It was just something that I knew to ask for from Sunday School. My parents talked about it saying I wanted to kneel beside my bed and pray a prayer, but as I grew older my faith has been shaped in a way of true understanding. I went through different stages of what it really meant to me. I grew up going to a church where my family has been always involved.
RM: It sounds like you were with Disney for quite a few years, how old were you when you first started working with them? Was this your first time being in the public eye? TM: I’ve always been doing musical theater and I started teaching dance in a studio in Oregon when I was 15. I was very involved with the community so I always felt in a very small sense, that I’ve had people looking up to me, making me want to live above reproach and as a good example. So in a way, I was in the public eye at a young age, which I think helped me with accountability when I was going through those growing years. When I was 18 and done with high school I moved down to southern California to pursue my dance career and one of my dreams within that was to dance for Disney, so I got a job there. The audition consisted of about 700 girls that wrapped around the building. They were only hiring a few dancers that day and I was one of them! I started there when I was 18 and finished with that when I was 25 years old. I…had to say goodbye to Disney to do The Bachelor because they were with the same company. At that time I was only doing Disney on the side, but to be on The Bachelor I had to be completely separate from it. RM: How do you deal with loneliness now, and then, or have you always been strongly independent? TM: Oh I definitely have that struggle; I mean it doesn’t come in those places of travel or adventure. But I think for me there really is that desire to have a partner in life, and I’ve definitely been through struggles of loneliness – especially when I went through divorce, or those transition times in life like my parents not living here, or my sister not living here – so for me it does come down to faith, and having to choose to believe that I’m not alone and surrounding myself with friends. To be honest, I keep myself busy and active when I’m lonely, or I cry, pray, and get it all out and face the moment for what it is because I can’t ignore stuff. Sometimes I just embrace that feeling and move forward with it. RM: What was your motivation for trying out to be on The Bachelor? TM: Well…it kind of happened really fast. It was following the heartbreak risenmagazine.com 15
Tenley Molzahn of going through my divorce. When I had gotten married I obviously had gotten married to stay married, but sometimes things happen that you have no control over. My ex-husband chose to take a different route and he is now married to her. Anyways, that aside, I was really heartbroken, distraught and couldn’t get past it. I was still wearing my wedding ring even
I kept surrendering. I had to surrender to knowing that God has got me and that I’m not in this alone
first when they were explaining the show to me, I wasn’t sure if that was goHelpslike Her Get Through ing to be Reality the best fit forTV meExperience because it kind of sounded an atmosphere that I wouldn’t be so comfortable with – all the coed activities and such. But the producers knew me well enough and they knew how to kind of reel meThe Bachelor’s in, and when I said how it sounded like an MTV show, they said it wasn’t like an MTV show and that it is on during prime time [nightly TV,] so we can’t show anything inappropriate or bad. So I was like, “Okay, I’ll do it.” And sure enough, I go on, and my season was the first show, so it wasn’t that bad; now it has gotten worse. But I remember being shocked when I was watching it play back thinking, how was this going on behind my back?! And I had no idea! I was completely naïve. I mean I did the show for another good opportunity and I had such a great experience the first time, and the growth that I had gained by doing The Bachelor was incredible. So I thought, “This opportunity wouldn’t hurt anything and it was a great opportunity and I should take it.” RM: You mentioned that you learned a lot from being on The Bachelor. Can you explain what that was? TM: Oh I grew so much! I experienced a lot of feelings. I would never ever encourage somebody to go on a show like this to get through these feelings. But it was very unique for me. There were moments where I felt completely romanced to God and I really was able to let go. I mean when my life had become unraveled during big changes in it, I realized I wanted control and wanted to hold everything close, I had a really hard time letting go of things. But when I went off to do The Bachelor I couldn’t make decisions. Meaning, I could make my own cognitive decisions, but as for what I was doing that day or how I would spend the day, I was at the will of other people. The producers told me where I was going to go, when to be ready, what I was going to do, when I was going to eat, or who I was going to see. So I really had to let go and I just didn’t have any control. It was really just a beautiful time for me.
… and that was hard to watch,
though it had been final for a while and I still had wedding pictures up. My heart was still very married and committed and I didn’t know how to move forward. Shortly after, my sister moved down from Oregon and was living with me for awhile and she was just sick of my sadness. We found out that there was an open call for The Bachelor coming to Costa Mesa, and I was living in Huntington Beach at the time, so she was like, “ You should go!” I remember joking around and I was like, “Haha ya, that’s me…” But she was getting serious about it and saying how I really should go and a couple other friends were saying that as well. So then the [audition] day came and my sister couldn’t be with me because she had to go to work, but she had another friend come by the house to basically make sure I went for the open call. And when I was there, all I did was sit in a room with a producer who asked questions, but the biggest part of that day was me thinking when I left, “Well being on the show is probably a joke and that won’t happen, but I got so much from this, because I’m now able to think of myself with someone else possibly being in my future.” I mean I had taken off my wedding ring for that, and it led me to go home and take down the wedding pictures. I was finally able to move forward. It was actually the moment that I needed to move forward. Then two weeks later, all of a sudden, I found out that I was on the show and driving up to LA to meet Jake [Pavelka] the Bachelor! It happened really fast. I didn’t have any time to process or have any expectations, which is why I think that I was able to have such a unique and incredible experience.
watch my brokenness. Especially knowing that I lived with so much joy, and peace and happiness...
I like to do things my way
RM: Was it hard for you to date someone who was also dating other girls you knew? TM: Yes, because I hadn’t really thought that part out yet, to date a guy when he was dating several other women. I mean my heart had just been broken so badly in my previous relationship too. I look back thinking, “Okay, how did I do that?” But that was just my faith, and me letting go and learning how to just trust. I continued to believe that if Jake wanted to keep getting to know me, then he would keep getting to know me. That if he didn’t, it would just end here and if he had a thing for another girl then he would let me go. I think that I just had a peace about it. So in the weirdest way, it helped me build trust again as well.
and it’s not always easy to say,
“Okay God I want your way.”
RM: What were your expectations for The Bachelor and would you say they were met, exceeded, or entirely different? TM: Well I didn’t really have time to think about it, so I didn’t really have that many expectations. I had watched the show quite a bit in the past seasons, but not on a weekly basis type of thing, but I had seen it enough to know how it goes. Because I didn’t think I’d make it past the first night, I just really tried to enjoy being in the mansion. But from there on out I just didn’t have any expectations whatsoever and just kept trying to be presentin-the-moment and just soak it up for what it was. RM: After being on The Bachelor, making all the way to the top two women, and then having Jake not pick you, what made you decide to do another show like The Bachelor Pad? TM: I know, and now I’m like, “Why was I so crazy?!” But they had a prize this time, and it was $250,000 and I thought if there was any chance that I could win this money, it would be so helpful. So I was very open. But at 16 Risen Magazine
RM: Many people have preconceived notions of what reality shows are like. Some think that are very organic and raw, while others feel the whole thing is scripted to get ratings and manipulated by producers. What can you tell us, in your experience, about how “truthful” motives are on a reality show? TM: For me the whole experience was very real. I was exactly who I was.
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risenmagazine.com 17
From Microsoft to the Mission Field
David Dwyer
David Dwyer playing soccer at Judson University in Chicago.
Writer: Henry Ortlip
e was one of the most influential book publishers during the Internet revolution, he was Head Storyteller at Microsoft, he was living in his dream house in Seattle surrounded by his loving family; and like the fisherman in the Gospel, David Dwyer was willing to follow the Lord, leave the States and go where he felt he was called. In this case, his calling was Chile. Risen caught up this globetrotter to learn more about his upbringing, career conversations, and the true meaning of success.
Interviewed Exclusively for Risen Magazine in Point Loma, California
Risen Magazine: What was your childhood like? David Dwyer: I was the youngest of ten kids and we lived in Cleveland, Ohio, on the campus of Case Western Reserve University. Growing up we were surrounded by college students, not really any kids [my age.] Everyone knew the Dwyer kids because there were ten of us, and we lived next door to a fraternity house. My father left when I was three-years-old; he just totally disappeared. My father came home one day, gave my oldest brother some money and said, “ Your mom’s birthday is coming up. Buy her something nice.” He said he had a business trip to go on, and he just left. It was the last time anyone saw him. He wrote a letter to our family doctor who is a close family friend. In the letter he said he was very stressed and felt a strain in the relationship and with having ten kids, he basically just checked out. He said he would be sending a check soon and that he had some leads on work and it was going well and he encouraged Jackie, my mother, to move to central Ohio to be near her relatives. RM: How did your mother react under these circumstances? DD: It was wild, when she read the letter she knew my dad wasn’t coming back. My mom’s attitude about everything was, “Look, I love your dad and I will continue to love your dad. You kids can pray for him if you like.” [I thought] pray for… what do you want us to pray for? Do you want him to come back, or do you want him to be safe? So I grew up praying, “Just keep my father safe Lord.” I remember as a kid praying that. I don’t remember that I ever prayed for him to come back though. She decided it was time to figure it all out and get on with life without him. RM: That takes some courage on your mom’s part. How would you describe her? DD: My mother was a kindergarten teacher. After my father left she ended up taking a job she really wasn’t qualified to get. She got a job at a hospital doing kids arts and crafts therapy; this was a new concept back then in 1966. Her second job was to work as a nurse’s assistant in the afternoon. She worked double shifts most days to make ends meet. My mother was a
great example of a woman of faith who depended on the Lord for EVERYTHING… literally. RM: With your mom having such strong faith, what did faith look like for you growing up? DD: I was raised in a Baptist church. When my mother would speak it was always about how the grace of God is what sustained us. To me, I don’t remember not knowing the Lord. I guess that’s the best way to put it. I know I made my commitment to Christ for the first time in Sunday school at Cedar Hill Baptist Church when I was in first grade. My life was a life observing this faith. I remember Jesus being very real to me. I remember things happened in my life where the Lord’s hand was very involved in it. The Holy Spirit was always very involved in my life. Though I didn’t realize the power of the Holy Spirit, I knew I was protected all the time, and to me that was a very big deal. So I never worried about things as a kid. Growing up I thought we were living just fine. It wasn’t until I was an adult that my mother shared stories about how bad things were. She would go to bed at night not knowing how she would put food on the table for us. She knew she had no money in her purse. She said she prayed to go to sleep, and she would sleep peacefully and the next day we would get a knock on the door, or an envelope would arrive. Something would always happen where we would eat. I never realized that, I never saw that side of things growing up. We moved out to the suburbs when I was in fourth grade and at that point, most of my brothers and sisters had moved out of the house. I would say that my mom became more relaxed. I certainly felt like when I got to
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20 Risen Magazine
WHO’S IN YOUR CORNER?
IN
WIN OR LOSE PEOPL
Writer: Mei Ling Starkey Photographer: Howard Schalz
hether playing a sport or going through life, the words of a friend, family member or coach have the power to get us through some of the toughest times. Whether fighting Evander Holyfield, or talking to youth, two-time heavyweight champ and Olympic Silver Medalist boxer Chris Byrd believes the highest level of the sport is giving back. Risen caught up with Byrd to hear how his parents challenged him in the ring, how his wife encouraged him in his relationship with Christ, and how he now uses his platform to give back to young people.
Interviewed Exclusively for Risen Magazine in San Diego, California
Risen Magazine: You started boxing at age five and competing at ten. How did you decide that this is what you wanted to do with your life? Chris Byrd: I come from a boxing family. There are five boys and three girls. All the boys boxed and the girls know how to box. My mom was in my coaching corner. It was in my blood, but I didn’t really know that it was I wanted to do with the rest of my life until I made it to the Olympic trials. I was number two in the United States in my weight class at seventeen years old. The age range was 17-35 so when I was seventeen, I was fighting against grown men. I was this skinny kid that was handling my business in the ring. I made it to the Olympic trials. I fought against this guy, Ariel Hernandez who was an Olympian. He was the number one guy. I ended up losing to him, but made up my mind that I would be at the next Olympics in four years. That was in 1992. I really made my mind up that I’m not playing around anymore. I knew then that boxing was what I wanted to do. RM: How did you start your spiritual journey? CB: I gave my life to the Lord when I was 22 years old. I got married pretty young and my wife gave her life to the Lord first. She started going to church, reading the Bible, and doing ministry. At the time, I wanted nothing to do with it. She kept telling me about the Lord and I did not want any part of it. I finally went to church to please her. I wasn’t expecting to become a Christian. I gave my life to the Lord three weeks after I first went to church. God has a plan for each of our lives. For me, my spiritual journey includes not only sharing the Gospel with boxers, but others around the world through the sport. RM: You saw your wife going to church for a long time, but you just didn’t want to go, so what was the turning point for you? CB: My wife, Tracy, begged me to go to church with her. Looking back it was a great thing. And then she just stopped asking me to go. I thought she stopped caring about me when she stopped asking me. So I told her that I would go to church with her. Going was the starting point and the real turning point was when I gave my life to Christ. RM: How would you relate the things you have learned in the boxing ring to your relationship with God?
CB: You’re in a constant fight. When I’m in a fight, I pray to God. When I was in the ring, I would look at these big guys and say, “Lord, give me the strength and energy to keep this fight, not only for me but for my opponent also. But I do want this victory.” It’s a battle in-and-out of the ring. In the ring, I fell in flesh and blood. Outside, I’m not. I’m battling against the world. I relate my boxing to a battle, to a fight, and I still do to this day. And that’s good advice for every single human. As a Christian, the thing is if you don’t know that you are in a fight, you are already losing. I never wanted to lose. I always strive and do things unto the Lord. God has my back. I just cling on tight to that. I used to go home all by myself after a fight, after all the celebration and just thank God for getting me through it. I would thank Him that we just won another battle. I thanked him for not getting injured. I prayed early on to the Lord to allow me to be a heavyweight and that I will represent him at the highest level; not knowing as a young Christian, I would eventually become a heavyweight and win titles. For me, it was solely to represent the Lord in the world of boxing. RM: Whether its finances, a battle with health, or relationship issues, a lot of us get to a point where we are ready to throw in the towel. What advice do you have for someone who feels like they are up against the ropes? CB: It is easy to say, but hard to live out. First, choose God and then totally trust and believe God is able to take care of you in all situations. You have to have faith that God can do it. You have to remember that he’s your Lord; he’s your Father. He will take care of you. Some Christians say, “I believe in that,” but don’t fully believe. And then you have other Christians that will say, “I can’t get through it.” It’s important to go back to God’s word. It shows how God is faithful and how he gets people through situations. The Bible is true and God is amazing. You have to read the Bible to truly understand
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22 Risen Magazine
Dept: Miracle
A Most Unlikely Convert: Meet
Writer: Samantha Baer Photographer: Jimmy Williams
t wasn’t that she didn’t like Christians; she despised them. To her, they were shallow people who quoted verses to fit an occasion, but had no depth in explaining the Bible. She was a lesbian and member of the gay activist movement in the early ‘90s. But the tides turned when she was befriended by a pastor and his wife. Rosaria Champagne Butterfield was drawn to read and study the Bible and came to believe it to be the true word of God. Author of the book, The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, Butterfield sat down with Risen to talk about her past lifestyle, how she wrestled with biblical principles, and the importance of how Christians should share their faith.
Interviewed exclusively for Risen Magazine in San Diego
Risen Magazine: What was your family and upbringing like? Rosaria Butterfield: I was raised in an Italian-Catholic family and went to predominantly Catholic schools. When we lived in the suburbs I think that my parents weren’t thrilled with the potential dangers – and because my mom is very intellectually-minded – I think at one point she didn’t like the science curriculum in the public schools so we then went the Catholic school route. I still like to joke around and say, “I still don’t know how to dress myself because I’m looking for five white blouses and two plaid skirts!” So overall I would say I had a “normal” childhood. I studied ballet, I was a gymnast, a runner, an equestrian and I loved reading, writing and athletics. My grandmother lived with us since I was six and taught me to knit, and I’ve never put my knitting needles down since then. RM: When you say in your book, “I boldly declare myself a Lesbian…” how do you feel the idea or way of a lesbian life started for you? RB: The gay and lesbian community itself is a diverse community – and we always have to remember that when I share my history, I always tell people this is really not diagnostic. I’m sharing with you, “Rosaria’s history” and my history is going to be very much different than the next person who identifies themselves as gay or lesbian. But in my case, I had a completely heterosexual adolescence. There’s no question about that. One of the things that started to happen was I started noticing that one of the reasons why I loved having a boyfriend was that it kept a particular nagging feeling I had at bay. It’s that feeling where somehow my female friendships were so much more intense, more meaningful, more rich, more vital, and fundamentally more interesting. At the same time, I was a very active participant in feminist organizations and movements. I would say I was raised in a very secular feminist household
even though I went to Catholic school. In some ways, my appreciation for an advocacy of feminist values, and just a deeper resonating interest in my female friendships began. The third prong of this is I started to realize that for heterosexual women, it is a meat market out there, and I hated it! I felt like everyday I just had a billboard on me saying, “Hey stare at my breasts, or stare at my behind.” Or “Please make a comment about my body.” I just absolutely hated it. So in some ways my sort of homo-social life, if that makes sense to you, sort of morphed into homosexuality in a fairly seamless way. It wasn’t a big event. Maybe part of that was because of my family origin – meaning if secular feminism is the worldview of your family, coming out as a lesbian is really not a big drama. My life, coming-out as a Christian has been a much more challenging issue for my family to bear than me coming out as a lesbian. I just morphed. Once I was in my first lesbian relationship I just thought, “Okay this is it, this is my real self.” Although I did have a heterosexual past and the reason why I’m emphasizing this is because there are some people who would rightly say, “ You know Rosaria you misnamed yourself and you really should have declared yourself bisexual.” But in the politics of the LGBT [Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender] community in the 90’s, bisexual was just not a happy place to be. I want to be clear on that. I was also not someone who ever said, “I was born this way.” I was a student of [Sigmund] Freud
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Dept: Expressions
Bikes and Beads Lead to Business and a Better Life
The Blessings of
31 Bits
Writer: Samantha Baer Team photo & lifestyle photos: Trever Hoehne Uganda photos: Kristin Arnesen
aper can take on many forms. It can be bound and made into a book or magazine, it can be folded through origami and turned into a crane, or cut all over until it becomes a snowflake, but for the women of Uganda their paper rolled into beads for jewelry turns into a better life, a business of their own and more blessings than they could have ever imagined. The company is 31 Bits and is one hundred percent handmade jewelry by the women of Uganda. Founded by five friends, Alli Swanson (one of the owners) talked with Risen about the brand, changing African culture, and a future full of hope.
Interviewed exclusively for Risen Magazine in Costa Mesa, California
Risen Magazine: Tell me when 31 Bits was founded and who was involved in the process? Alli Swanson: Well we started in 2008 and there were five of us girls. Kallie Dovel, one of the girls, went out to Uganda the summer between her junior and senior year [of college] and her boyfriend at the time was starting up another company called Krochet Kids. Kallie joined the Krochet Kids team and went out to Uganda to work in an orphanage. Things fell through with her working at the orphanage and she decided to travel around on her own and met some women that were making paper jewelry. She ended up spending the rest of her summer working with them, serving, and really living life there to understand more. She returned to the States with a big box of jewelry and sold it to anyone and everyone she could on campus. While selling the beads she approached some of us [girls] with an idea and explained how the beads were a great product and that these women desperately needed a job. We all loved the product and there did seem to be quite a bit of promise to help this country. So we all ended up going out with Kallie to Uganda the following summer to meet with the women, other organizations, all with the hope of developing a strong business model. Towards the end of the summer in 2008, Kallie stayed in Uganda to run things and we came back to the States to start things here. We started small and hired six women from Uganda to make jewelry where in turn we provided them with incomes. What changed everything was after just a couple months, Reef sandals heard about our jewelry and what we were doing and called me on the phone one day saying, “We love your jewelry; we love your beads; we love your story… and we want to make a special sandal design with what you do.” After that we were invited to their headquarters and you can only imagine what we looked like. We were still getting things started so we brought in Xeroxed photos of the women and a tub of random beads. But, they fell in love with our story and soon after they placed an order for thousands of strands of beads to go with their “Ugandal” sandal! This is when we realized that something had started for 31 Bits and that God was doing something much bigger than we had anticipated. We hired more women, created a website, made a trademark, and shaped our business better. It was exciting, but also a really scary time for us. We knew hiring more women was a risk and there was a possibility that we wouldn’t be able 24 Risen Magazine
to provide for them later on. So we took a step of faith and when Reef sandals ordered those original strands, we hired 20 more ladies! RM: Are you still working with Reef? AS: Actually we are not anymore. We worked with them for a couple years and did about seven different sandal designs. But we stopped because it was too hard to be sending sandals from our compound in Uganda to their factories in Brazil, back to the States. Reef also needed beads that were a specific size, which made quality control really difficult. Our products are made totally by hand and they are obviously going to be a little different and unique at times – which is our favorite part – but for Reef they couldn’t be that way so we chose to stop with sandals. A couple of Reef reps (who represented our sandals) also represented Reef jewelry and were able to get us into some stores selling just jewelry as well. So it was a huge start for us through Reef and then we grew organically. RM: How did the name 31 Bits come into work? AS: The name 31 Bits comes from the Bible in Proverbs 31 which describes the beauty of a woman that provides for her family. RM: Where do you buy the paper used to make the jewelry? AS: Everything that we use is from Uganda. It is actually pretty neat because we are in the process of filming and making a video to show people how it all works. Basically, we go with the women and travel down to Kampala [the capital of Uganda] a couple of times a month to a paper mart. The women will go and buy old recycled paper from printing shops who don’t need it anymore – like Pepsi who has a lot of old posters ready to recycle, or they buy paper from other ladies selling in a local market, which is awesome to help them out as well. So all of our paper is from old magazines
To read more of this issue please purchase the full edition at our Facebook Store. Coming Soon to the App Store
Dept: Expressions
(L to R) Jessie Simonson, Kallie Dovel, Anna Nelson, Brooke Hodges and Alli Swanson model jewelry from 31 Bits. The five friends founded the company to help internally displaced women in Uganda rise out of poverty.
risenmagazine.com 25
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