CATALYST: 'CURIOUS', Issue 4, Volume 75

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t-shirt evangelism my family in the circus

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toxic ticking time bomb --13 --24 t-shirt 18-- evangelism the moth on the wall --26 32-- my family in Contents the circus the unspeakable world --35 --44 6 7 8 10 16 22

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black walnut --39

Ed’s Letter President’s Letter News Updates The Curious World of Student Politics Digital Smokescreens Not Gods but Creators

28 Collage series 48 The Lightbulb Conspiracy 50 Dreams and What They Mean 52 Seven facts about Leafy Sea Dragons


contributors Editors Emily Cork Lekhika Jain Rana El-Mahmoud

Design Emily Cork Betul Kuyruk Jamie Tung

News Editor Rachael Merritt

Front Cover Oceana Piccone @oceana.pearl

Proofreader Cameron Magusic Film, Culture & Music Cameron Magusic Arnel Duracak

Back Cover Jean Baulch @baulch_tales Social Media Done De Beer Ida Sass Andersen

Editorial Committee Alexander Gudic-Hay Anshul Srivastava Cameron Magusic Sarah Krieg Emma Sullivan Isabella Krebet Alexandra Middleton Madelane Higginson Website Coordinator Jigar Manish Parekh Rishabh Satish Bhosale

Printer Printgraphics Pty Ltd 14 Hardner Road, Mount Waverley, Victoria 3149 Australia Special Thanks To Scape Swanston Primary Sponsor

Catalyst and RMIT University Student Union acknowledge the people of the Woi wurrung and Boon wurrung language groups of the eastern Kulin Nations on whose unceded lands we conduct the business of the University. RMIT University respectfully acknowledges their Ancestors and Elders, past and present. Catalyst and RMIT University Student Union also acknowledge the Traditional Custodians and their Ancestors of the lands and waters across Australia where it conducts its business.

Catalyst Issue 04 2019 RMIT student magazine est. 1944

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Catalyst is the student magazine of the RMIT University Student Union (RUSU). The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of the editors, the printers or RUSU.

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Contact rmitcatalyst@gmail.com rmitcatalyst.com RMIT Building 12, Level 3, Room 97

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Excerpt from ‘Flourish’ Zine

Emily Cork @ohdeer.art


Lekhika Jain Rana El-Mahmoud Emily Cork

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ed’s letter Well hello there reader, thanks for picking up a copy of Catalyst! This issue focuses on all things curious. What do you wonder about? What do you find strange, peculiar, eccentric, or inexplicable? As a student magazine, we bring together writers, creators, thinkers and investigators from so many different fields of study. Something that every single Catalyst contributor and reader has in common is a sense of curiosity, a thirst for sharing and absorbing new ideas and stories. This issue is a lucky dip, a collection of the slightly off kilter or out-of-the-ordinary topics that our contributors chose to focus on. We’re so excited to share some exquisitely unique artwork from RMIT fashion student Oceana Piccone, whose painting Connection graces our front cover. Flick to page 13 to find her environmentally-focused installation artwork Toxic Ticking Time Bomb, and some more paintings on page 24.

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We’ve also featured some incredible photo essays from photographers Portia Sarris (p. 35), and Bonnie Jarrett (p. 45). Of course, our ‘Curious’ issue is peppered with creative fiction, from Jamisyn Gleeson’s dystopian Digital Smokescreens (p. 16), to Isabella Krebet’s poem Not Gods but Creators (p. 22, to Black Walnut - a quirky tarot card and Pottermore inspired piece by Amanda May Thai (p. 39). We hope this issue gives you something new to ponder when your phone dies on the tram ride home, and that you love reading it as much as we loved putting it together.

Until next time, The Eds Emily, Rana & Lekhika

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Ella Gvildys

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president’s letter This Curious issue of Catalyst has given me lots to think about. I wanted to use this opportunity to shed some light on RUSU’s activities, for those of you who may be interested to learn more about what we do. One of the key themes that comes to mind when I think of curiosity is the importance of transparency. As elected representatives, we strive to always communicate our priorities and actions so that you - our fellow students - can make informed choices. One of the ways we do this is through the RUSU website, including the Campaigns and Quarterly Reports pages, where we highlight RUSU’s recent efforts and initiatives to make improvements at RMIT. Another way we do this is by getting out and speaking to students - at Chill n Grills, at events like RUSU’s recent Student Life Awards and on campus generally. Feel free to come and say hi, or ask us questions when you see us around campus.

I know that the pressures of study, work and independent living mean that we all need a bit of extra support from time to time and I’m curious about how RMIT can do better. I’ve been talking to RMIT Wellbeing team and listening to students so that we can feed through more authentic student experience into RMIT’s work in this space. Your wellbeing is important to me and, if you’re also curious about mental wellbeing on campus, please don’t hesitate to reach out to one of our Compass staff or Student Liaison Officers at the RUSU front counters. Finally, curiosity is about having fun while learning. I want to wish you all the best for your studies this semester. I hope you can discover something new each day, and that it puts a smile on your face!

I think curiosity also implies a sense of passion and drive to find out more and dig deeper. Something I’m personally curious about is the mental wellbeing of our student community. President’s Letter

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news updates RMIT rises up the global ranks

It’s a nice feeling to be moving up in the world and no doubt a cause for celebration. Time to pop those champagne corks because RMIT has secured its spot in the 301-400 band in the 2019 Academic Ranking of World Universities. Estimates suggest RMIT is now sitting at a rank of 354, climbing 16 places from 370 in 2018. Around 1,800 universities are ranked annually out of more than 15,000 institutions globally with only the top 1,000 universities making the final cut. Numbers aside, it means we’re a pretty smart bunch.

City Challenge: Designing out waste | Sep 4 - 5

Think you’ve got what it takes to design a solution to Melbourne’s wastage problem? RMIT and the City of Melbourne are calling on all creative and scientific thinkers to devise innovative solutions and present your ideas to senior city leaders and experts. Over two days, you’ll be working in teams, hearing from industry experts and visiting organisations who are on the frontline of waste innovation. If you’ve got a burning idea, now is the time to leave your mark on the city.

2019 Korean Film Festival | Sep 5 - 12 After extensive renovations, RMIT’s Capitol Theatre has been reopened in all its former 1920s glory. What better way to mark the occasion than with the 2019 Korean Film Festival which is returning for the 10th year. This ticketed event is bringing the best of Korean cinema to your very doorstep. From mega budget blockbusters, rom-coms, comedy, horror and indie flicks, explore Korea’s very own ‘Hallyuwood’ at RMIT. Each film is accompanied with English subtitles so both cinema buffs and movie novices are welcome.

YA Blak - Blak & Bright | Sep 7

Fancy an afternoon in conversation with award-winning playwrights and authors? As part of Blak & Bright, a First Nations Literary Festival, author Jane Harrison who is descended from the Muruwari people, is sitting down with Jannali Jones, an Aboriginal author of the Gunai nation. Her debut novel My Father’s Shadow, which follows the story of a young girl’s journey to reconcile with the past, earned her the Black&Writing fellowship. Register for free online to catch these two literary minds colliding at RMIT Storey Hall.

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Social Tennis Sessions | every Thursday

Climbing with Pride | Sep 21 RMIT Outdoors Club has partnered up with ClimbingQTs to bring you Climbing with Pride, an LGBTQIA+ rock climbing social event. The evening kicks off at the RMIT Media Portal where you can get acquainted with your new climbing buddies before moving across the street to Hardrock Climbing. But the party doesn’t end there: reward your efforts afterwards with a well-earned drink. Open to all participants regardless of climbing experience.

RMIT ITS Hack-4-Good | Sep 25

If you’ve got hacking skills, it’s time to put them to use for a good cause. Hack-4-Good is calling on students and staff to collaborate, design and pitch digital solutions for a better world. You’ll get the chance to work in teams, network and help charities and non-forprofit organisations by designing tech-based solutions to help the community. RMIT students only so unlike the Swanston Library you don’t have to worry about your spot being taken by a student from another uni (we know who you are).

Tennis for one? No fun. Take a friend or take yourself and head down to the RMIT Sports Centre at the Bundoora West Campus for a spot of social tennis. Teams are made up on the day and there is no need to register. No racquets or skills? No problem. Equipment is provided and all skill levels are welcome. Jump into the action on the brand new tennis courts every Thursday from 4 - 7pm.

RUSU Free Healthy Breakfast

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day and you’ll never have to skip it again with RUSU serving up free brekky across the City, Brunswick and Bundoora campuses. Grab some yoghurt, a piece of fruit or a muffin on your way to class and fuel up before hitting the books. You’ll find pop-up breakfast stalls all over the place so head to the RUSU website for campus locations. After all, when you’re a student, the best kind of breakfast is a free one.

News Updates

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The Curious World of Student Politics

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Students and politics. Two words that seemingly go hand in hand. For the majority of students, it’s at university where they begin to become politically engaged as they enter the workforce, leave home, start paying rent and experience firsthand that doing your tax is a necessary evil. It’s also a time to be curious. Whether you’ve signed up for the long haul of tertiary education at RMIT or only here for a few months, being a student means being curious. Whether you’re questioning your career path, your identity, discovering how late to leave an assignment before making the deadline or curious about transitioning from university life into the workforce after graduation, it can sometimes feel as if there are more questions than solutions. In 75 years of publication, Catalyst magazine has aimed to provide answers to some of these questions by capturing student perspectives at various stages throughout their journey at RMIT. The magazine has also been an open forum for students to exercise their developing political voice and conscience. After all, students have a legacy of standing against injustice and using their voice to create political affect, whether it be on climate change, the cost of education, fighting xenophobia or sexual assault and harassment on campus. But where do students first express their political voice? The answer lies in the pages of the 1993 edition of Catalyst, that covered The Curious World of Student Politics

the elections for the Student Representative Council (SRC). Each student submitted a small paragraph outlining their election promises to reshape the SRC and generally improve the quality of student life on campus. Their election pitches are a testament to the fact RMIT students have always been a forward thinking bunch who also care deeply about the quality of food served at the uni cafes. Candidate Robert Braun was straight to the point when he promised to “cut the crap (esp. in the cafe) and reform the Union.” From the Art and Design Department, candidate Matthew Kennedy could certainly take out the title of king of the cynics, and he wasn’t standing for the nepotism which was creeping into the SRC. “Greed, power and financial reward seem to be the motivation in politics (both student and otherwise) at the moment,” he said. “They think they’re playing some twisted real life version of Monopoly and it is very, very scary,” he said. Young, hopeful, ambitious and politically minded, the 1993 candidates aren’t so different from the students of today, each curious to find out how their ideas can contribute to building a stronger RMIT. In keeping with the theme of this issue, it’s only natural to be curious about which career paths these young candidates have taken and whether they still believe in the ideas they

Rachael Merritt


Rachael Merritt 12 pitched to Catalyst 26 years ago. Luckily, there is one familiar face among the list of hopefuls, Catalyst’s very own co-editor Rana El Mahmoud. For Rana, life has come full circle and she has returned to study at RMIT and is currently a second year student in the Bachelor or Arts (Photography). Back in 1993, Rana was a second year Computing and Applied Physics student when she ran as a candidate for the SRC. She is one of few people in a privileged position to describe not only where her curiosity has led her following her graduation, but the changes Catalyst has undergone in the previous decades.

that “nothing comes without planning and hard work,” a motto she still believes in today.

“It was a journal, accessible to all students like now, but it used to cover student’s activities such as events, nomination and elections”.

Being a student means not having all the answers all of the time, but it also allows you the space to be curious, to form opinions, political or otherwise, and have them heard.

But while the magazine’s content has diversified, it still has the same message at heart.

“Nothing has been easy in life, each experience made me stronger in something, it built my knowledge and enhanced my humanity”. So while you probably wouldn’t have found the solutions to all the questions by the end of your RMIT journey, chances are your experiences have shaped you and given a clearer understanding of your ethics, morals, values and the issues and people which deserve your time and attention.

“Catalyst is still by students, for students,” Rana said. Having walked the path between graduating, navigating the workforce and returning to tertiary study, Rana said the process has made her “more realistic and less expecting,” but she still stands by the same values she formed during her time at RMIT all those years ago. As part of her election promise, she stated

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toxic ticking time bomb

Toxic Ticking Time Bomb

Oceana Piccone


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Dear reader, I am an artist expressing my concerns and fear for the future on planet Earth. I believe there is hope in the face of change. Which is why I feel it’s my duty as an artist in today’s society to confront relevant issues through my art. I have always found art a contemporary mode of communicating and visually depicting my views on the world. My body of work, Toxic ticking time bomb, represents my vision of the human race coming to our own ruins and bringing the animal kingdom with us. The puddles represent humanity & the animal kingdom drowning in man made toxic matter. I believe nature will grow through the ashes of humanity and continue after we’re gone.

Has our evolution come to a halt in the face of planetary change? Will we just move onto the next inhabitable planet and leave this one to its inevitable fate? Or are we going to use our evolved technology and power to reverse this terrible fate? Toxic ticking time bomb revolves around my concerns towards global warming, ocean levels rising, oil mining, de-forestation and animal extinction. This world we know as home is undergoing serious environmental massacre and has been overtaken by our waste and pollutant matter, due to our ignorant approach. Humanity has turned a blind eye to these issues. We need to wear our hearts on our shoulders, have compassion for Mother Earth and all who dwell here. This artwork represents my subjective response to what’s happening all around us. Open your eyes and take action before it’s too late!

Toxic Ticking Time Bomb

Oceana Piccone


Jamisyn author Gleeson name 16

Digital Smokescreens Almost every seat in this bus is taken. I prop my head up against my flattened palm and gaze listlessly at jutting elbows, jittery knees, and fat thumbs scrolling through endless digital content. A vehement rustling disturbs the silence as a woman rummages through her tote bag. She digs through its contents with her right hand while she holds a cardboard cup in her left, and a few drops of brown liquid spill onto its lid. I can’t remember what rich, decent coffee tastes like, not since the land in Ethiopia grew stubborn and dry. I wonder where she got it from. It must have cost her a small fortune. In the row beside me, a little girl with dark braids shifts uncomfortably in her overly large seat. She fiddles with the thin computer screen in front of her and after a few seconds, finds the button she’s looking for. She grins as the window to her right fades and turns opaque, blocking out her view of the landscape and the harsh glare of the sun. I turn to my own window to watch the suburbs as they slip behind us. In the distance, yellow grass grows over a large, open playing field. It’s barren and neglected, but it won’t be for much longer. In a few months it will be excavated, built up and sold like the rest of the land.

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I’ve come alone today. My friends aren’t really interested in the seaside anymore—it’s too far away, too open, too useless—but I miss the smell of the ocean and the electric touch of its shockingly cold water. I sit placidly by the window with my phone in my lap until we arrive at a great, grey carpark. Once we come to a standstill beside a dozen other electric buses, we clamber out of our seats, gather our devices and wait outside in silence. “Please make your way to the entrance for your two thousand and fifty sea experience,” a calm, feminine voice advises over concealed speakers. The entrance is built into a long, flat building that spans the length of the beach. This is what separates us from the water. A dozen tablets are embedded in its walls. I brush my finger against one of the screens to unlock it. After recognising my fingerprint, a consent form pops up, asking for permission to record my attendance. I draw a black tick onto the screen with my finger. It then asks me to sign for an immediate bank withdrawal. I sigh and scribble my name, allowing the large sum to be transferred. The tablet glows green and triggers the opening of two tall metal doors. Behind them is a narrow reception room lined with floor to ceiling windows, giving me a full view of the ocean. I can’t help but stare. The water shivers and glitters in a numb palette of blue and green, and ripples with the slightest movement of wind. The sand is perfectly smooth, lacking intrusive footprints, and stretches on for golden kilometres. I exit reception through a wide door and walk out onto the sand. Here, the air is salty and

title / heading Digital Smokescreens

fresh. I shiver a little in my thin top. The rest of my group wanders along the shore, openmouthed and wide-eyed. A playful splash excites a group of kids, including the girl with dark braids, who points and laughs at a little school of fish that gather in the shallows. But— fish don’t live in our oceans anymore. The few species that managed to fight extinction were relocated to aquariums years ago. Wildly, I glance around the beach and try to catch someone’s eye. Nobody seems to notice that anything is wrong. I shuffle closer to the water and dip my fingers into the still mass of blue. I wait for the biting cold to attack my skin—but it never arrives. Instead, patches of grey begin to disperse throughout the water and the cloudless sky jitters, as though disturbed by my presence. The hologram collapses like a faulty curtain, and the beach is no longer a golden landscape, but a mess of water bottles, plastic lids and shopping bags. The only green thing that moves is a piece of plastic twisting upwards like the hand of the living dead. The sea—wounded, poisoned and still—seems to shrink into itself. The digital smokescreen twitches, and a blue blush runs across the sky. The sea glitters again, and fish begin to dive. While the sand turns softer, plants stir and thrive. “We apologise for that minor inconvenience,” the calm voice states through the speakers. The kids squeal in delight and look for more diamond-scaled fish while tourists continue to photograph their virtual reality. The woman who drank coffee on my bus sits her plasticlined cup on the sand. She smiles at me as she walks away from it.

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T-SHIRT EVANGELISM

When I think of my father, I see a man sitting on a sunken, faux-leather couch with a can of Coke, watching nature documentaries. When neighbours or family friends ask about my father, they refer to the man with a microphone. Or the man in a plane somewhere. On stage he wears a collared shirt in a shade determined by where he is in the world: bright red for Asia, plain blue for Europe and tropical flower prints for the Cook Islands. I am what is known as a PK – pastor’s kid. When he is out at Preston Market buying boxes of fruit he won’t be home long enough to eat, he wears t-shirts with Christian slogans obscure enough in their design to encourage people to ask questions. One has ‘blues breakin, earth shakin, life makin, problem solvin, fun lovin’ in bold letters of blue, red, yellow and green. And then ‘Jim’ is written underneath, with two dots hanging above the curve of the J to form a smiley face. But my dad’s name is not Jim. It’s Kul (‘cool’). Taking the bait, I asked why he had the name Jim on his shirt. ‘It stands for Jesus In Me.’

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Stephanie Bal

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There’s a jumper that’s made its way through my family and now hangs in my wardrobe. My older sister bought it in the nineties, after saving up pocket money for months. It was too big for me when she was ready to pass it down, so it ended up on a hanger in my dad’s wardrobe for a while. And, like other jumpers in my dad’s wardrobe, I eventually claimed it. For a twenty-year-old jumper, it’s doing okay. There are loose threads on the black stitched logo and the hem is misshapen, but it’s more than nostalgia that keeps me wearing it. It’s an Adidas original. Wearing a particular brand or style is usually a form of individuality, status or expression. The contradiction of the Christian tee is that its purpose is to impact the passerby, not define the wearer. It’s called t-shirt evangelism. In the words of Vic Kennett, CEO & Founder of Kerusso, the self-proclaimed number one provider of Christian-themed apparel, t-shirt evangelism is ‘reaching others with the good news of God’s love by wearing a Christianthemed t-shirt’. And – apparently – it works.

T-shirt Evangelism

In the Christian Apparel Faith & Motivational Research survey they conducted in 2009, more than half (56.8%) of those surveyed reported that at least one person ‘with no personal faith in Christ asked about the garment’s message’. The humble Christian tee still, for the most part, has the aesthetic residue of its surge in the eighties and nineties. Using one’s chest as a marketing or activism billboard was at an all-time high and Christians took well-known product slogans or logos and put a Jesus twist to it. There’s the ‘Jesus is my life saviour’ tee in the five colours of the ring-shaped American candy Life Savers. Or ‘My lifeguard walks on water’ in Baywatch red with a white cross in the centre. And then enters Kanye. At Coachella in April 2019, Kanye sold an eight-piece apparel collection of earthy hues with messages like ‘Trust God’ under a merch tent with a ‘Church Clothes’ banner. In July, he registered ‘Sunday Services’ for bottoms, dresses, footwear, headwear, jackets, loungewear, shirts, socks and tops. Stephanie Bal


Stephanie Bal 20 My partner, Matt, and I were eating dinner with friends who moved from Brisbane to start a church in Melbourne. The conversation moved from the butter chicken on our plates, to the Kardashians and then to Dave’s new jumper, which he bought on Kanye’s website. ‘Holy Spirit’ was scrawled on the front and ‘Sunday service at the mountain’ on the back. And, unfortunately for his wife who said they usually checked with each other on purchases over 100, that jumper set them back 300 dollars. He also bought 50 dollar socks that say ‘church socks’. ‘It’s a great evangelism tool,’ he reasoned. The next Sunday, I (reluctantly) went to church for their first service and the forty-minute

sermon was entirely about tithing and how we need to invest our money in ‘the kingdom’. ‘How’s that 300 dollar jumper treating you?’ Matt asked on our way out. Three Sundays later, Matt visited again (I’m never going back) and the pastor was wearing the 300 dollar jumper while preaching. While neutral hues with a nod to the underutilised being in the Trinity appeal to me more than the rainbow-coloured block letters my father wears, I’m left wondering: is Kanye capitalising on Christianity’s obsession with evangelism, or pushing the boundaries of religion’s relevance?

Source: grailed.com

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Photograph

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Isabella Krebet

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the stuff dreams are made of i never thought i would find you our love was queer It is only baffling that we have lived wandered and wondered now we are home our microscopic potential unlocked bountiful fusion of gametes gathered loss has been found this new life is rebirth we are the furthest from god yet we are blessed creators it is curious how i expand yet do not grow every day she glows this heaviness does not weigh me down pride shows when we announce directions takes us far but dreams take us further

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it kicks me that we will meet someone new how long we have waited it is strange how i am making decisions literature said i would i find it funny that it flows that nothing has predicted my feelings

our extraordinary wary darling how puzzling you are shy to the world we have been stepped on and torn ourselves yet the bizarre and crazy brought you here soon you will see we are not all so different subatomically, we resonate the sundry of oddities we comprise a damn happy life.

Not Gods But Creators

Isabella Krebet

But Creators

our groundbreaking child bloody made it we have laboured away for you god, it is weird to love so hard i would die you remarkable and mystifying baby and i beam to my partner the unorthodox pays off unequivocally


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Golden Creator Paintings

Oceana Piccone @oceana.pearl


Carynn author E-Jin name Lai 26

The Moth on the Wall I was perhaps six or seven when I first saw the moth on the wall. Like every other day, I was at my grandmother’s house after school. She would prepare a snack and help me shower. “Don’t forget to wash between the toes later,’ she said while scrubbing my hair, my head tugging along her movements. I squinted my eyes as the shampoo ran down my face. Something black and brown came in sight. I wiped the shampoo off my eyes so I could see it better. It was a moth. I was afraid its wings might get wet from the running shower, but It flew around the danger zone expertly and landed on the white tiles of the bathroom walls. Close enough for me to make out the brown patterns on its wings and far enough from the water. ‘Look, Mama,’ I pointed at the moth. My grandmother looked up and smiled. ‘Ah, don’t splash water at it,’ she said, ‘your great-grandmother, my mother, is here to visit us.’ ‘Really?’ ‘She’s here to protect and watch over us. So, every time you see a moth, remember to be nice, okay?’ She rinsed off the shampoo and pumped soap in my hands, ‘your toes.’ Each time I saw a moth, I would point at it and tell my younger sister that it’s our great-grandmother visiting us. Sometimes, there were two of them. I assumed that it must be my great-grandfather. We were careful around them, afraid that

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27 if any harm comes to them, we might bring bad luck to our family. It was the idea of our souls and our spirits being fused into a moth that intrigued me. I watched them when they visited. Of course, I did it discreetly, else they might think me disrespectful. I wondered, are they here to bless us? What harm are they protecting us from and what harm have they protected us from? Are they proud of me? Proud of my grandmother and the family she has now? She raised me with the belief that everything I do in life will matter in the afterlife. If I had done bad, I would be punished in hell. But if I was a good person, my body may be claimed by the earth, but my mind and soul could be reborn into another human, or another being, like my great-grandmother. My grandmother told me a lot of things like how we can’t point at the full moon or our ears will fall off and never to write people’s name in red ink because it meant I wish death upon them. She told me to never place my chopsticks upright in a bowl or it might bring bad luck and invite hungry ghosts. Years passed and I learnt about superstition. I expected myself to chuck those beliefs and stories away but instead, found myself not pointing at the full moon, being mindful of the colour of ink I’m using, placing my chopsticks on top of the bowl, and still, watching the moths – wondering if I’ve done well enough.

title Moth The / heading on the wall

Carynn author E-Jinname Lai

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author name Jean Baulch @baulch_tales


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I went to my first Cirque du Soleil show a couple of years ago and it was one of the best experiences of my life, if not the best. Little did I know that my family history is entwined with life in the circus, and perhaps I was genetically destined to love it. My family has been in Australia for many generations, which means that family history isn’t always discussed. Tales of traversing across the sea to a new land with new customs are too distant in my family to be shared. But as most people are, I was still curious about what was in my past and who exactly my ancestors were. Some worked in the bank or in other standard jobs. But for a couple of generations, my family were circus performers. It all began with my great-great-grandmother Julia Gore. Julia was a fortune teller in a circus that travelled around country New South Wales. She fell pregnant to a circus photographer. In 1908, she gave birth to their first daughter, Venus, outside on the ground under a gumtree. No trip to the hospital for the circus crew. In 1910, she gave birth to their second daughter, Mars. Also outside. Also on the ground, under a tree.

My Family In the Circus

It was not a typical birth arrangement. But not much was ‘normal’ in the circus. It was a different world to the one I’m living in today. Julia and the adults slept in tents each night while the kids shared the circus’ big top with the animals. Each night they’d all settle down beside the monkeys, pigs and dogs. Mars told stories of how she would snuggle up next to a pig on cold nights to keep warm. The kids didn’t regularly attend school. They would sometimes join local schools in towns they passed through or when the circus took its three-month break each year. Most of the time, though, they would just hang out with the animals. Animals were a huge part of circus life. Mars and Venus could ride horses bareback before they could walk. Alongside acrobatics and trapeze, bareback riding was what Mars and Venus performed. In their spare time, they’d break in and train brumbies with the other circus kids. Apparently, this was the only time Mars ever got hurt. But nothing would destroy her confidence that a few kids could break in a wild horse better than anyone else.

April Austen


April Austen 34

Circuses have always been full of kids and particularly so in the early 1900s. Some families, like mine, grew up in the circus. But circuses also tended to double as orphanages, taking in unwanted children. It was common practice for a new parent to simply leave a child at the foot of the troupe.

The circus became a refuge for children with nowhere to go.

When she was 12-and-a-half, Mars fell ill with the black flu (or Spanish flu), which killed 50 million people worldwide. Mars survived, but was in hospital for months and never returned to the circus once she recovered. She got a job in a hotel at the age of thirteen and had to wear shoes for the first time in her life.

changed her name to Marjory after leaving the circus. No longer were she and her sister ‘Venus and Mars, the two stars’, as they had initially been named. In 1935, Venus gave birth to a daughter – Norma. Norma is my grandmother. It was years since the Gores had left the circus, but Norma still grew up on the back of a horse, riding to school every day. With each generation, my family has moved further and further away from circus life. The circus always seems like something magical and unusual, filled with people who are unique and living a totally different life to most. This may be true, but when you find out that people in your own family were circus performers, the idea of dropping everything to run away with a circus doesn’t seem that unachievable.

Venus left in her mid-teens and moved to Melbourne with Julia and Mars to work in a factory for canned sauces, jams and fruit company Rosella. The Great Depression had hit and everyone, including the circus, was struggling to survive financially. When she was 19, Venus got married and moved away to live in Gippsland. Mars became a seamstress. In 1990 when Mars was 80, she was interviewed on TV by Ray Martin. She had

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Portia Sarris @portiasplace_

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The Unspeakable World

The Unspeakable World is a personal and intimate glimpse into

my relationship with both photography and what confronts me every single day. It is a visual autobiography of my experiences with finding, and speaking my voice. This series aims to explore the theme of disparity between ideas and representation through light, transparent and distorting articles, and refracted projections. The light represents an idea, experience or thought that triggers a reaction, being anything from a conversation or thought to writing a novel or taking a photograph. The object symbolises the mind, soul and body of a person that experiences and considers the experience. The refracted light and distorted projections represent how people process visual information in various ways, therefore projecting different outcomes.

The Unspeakable World

Portia Sarris @portiasplace_


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Portia Sarris @portiasplace_

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The Unspeakable World

Portia Sarrris @portiasplace_


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Amanda May Thai

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BLACK WALNUT BIO: Saturday is a third-year creative writing student. Her work has been published in The Gazette for the Emerging Writers’ Festival and also in the Bowen Street Press Review. In collaboration with non/fictionLab, she co-wrote pieces for Melbourne Knowledge Week.

* Final year, Saturday thinks as she sets up her desk, opening Scrivener and lighting a lime-scented candle. After three years, she finally feels like she can call herself a writer. No more being ashamed of her sparse bio—nope—now she has an arsenal of pieces. Saturday opens her email and her heart flutters. Her recent pitch to Impetus magazine has been accepted. Against her writing training, she pitched an alreadywritten piece—a 2000-word experimental piece of autofiction that received great praise from her tutor.

And it worked out.

She reads the email: We’d like to commission your piece about “visual

Saturday reads the word count again and frowns.

fantasy & realism experiment” 500 - 700 words in the next edition.

* bio: amanda is a third-year creative writing student who spends most of her time not-reading and not-writing. she likes board games and makes cookies to give herself a sense of accomplishment.

she is not a writer. she is a ball of worry.

amanda looks down at herself on the page. she’s gotten a lot smaller over the last three years. sometimes she wishes she was smaller, so she could simply disappear. maybe then the worry—the ‘is my writing stagnating?’, the ‘oh god, all my writing is the same’, the ‘i’ve run out of ideas for good’—would disappear too.

Black Walnut

Amanda May Thai


Amanda May Thai 40 * Saturday is not in a freak-out—nope—she’s a professional writer so she’s definitely not stressing out about why she pitched an already-written piece. She’s certainly not worried about word count. She stares at that 2000-word piece that earned her so much praise in workshops, the piece that taught her she could write experimentally. cut it down—says

a small voice.

But she can’t. If she does, the motifs won’t have time to fully bake. Saturday reaches for her phone and checks her moon app. It’s a new moon in Leo. Maybe a tarot spread will clear her mind. She pulls out her Mystic Mondays tarot deck, and finds a tarot spread on her phone. She asks the prescribed questions; she draws the cards.

wand wand

sword sword

wand wand

sword / sword

sword

wand wand

sword

wand wand

sword

wand _____

The last card trips her up.

Where in my life is my ego blocking me?

The Ace of Swords. A card of new ideas and mental breakthroughs.

Saturday tries to reassure herself. The Ace of Swords is a good card. It means clarity.

She stares at the bright silver of lone sword.

Clarity.

A flash of silver.

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The Ace of Swords flutters to the ground.

* swords cups pentacles wands swords

cups

pentacles wands wands wands Pottermore, 2016 – black walnut 11 inches phoenix feather core —unyielding

* ‘[black walnut wood] has one pronounced quirk, which is that it is abnormally attuned to inner conflict, and loses power dramatically if its possessor practises any form of self-deception. If the witch or wizard is unable or unwilling to be honest with themselves or others, the wand often fails to perform adequately…’ - Pottermore

Black Walnut

Amanda May Thai


Amanda May Thai 42 * it takes several hours, but eventually amanda works up the courage to sit down at saturday’s desk. the piece for impetus isn’t going to submit itself. that 2000-word piece is still open. she reads it, expecting all the hallmarks of a good writer. and she gets them. but she also gets something else. rawness. saturday wrote this piece about a character struggling with their assignment because she herself was struggling with her assignment. it’s the most honest she’s ever been.

and there’s the idea. bright and silver. like the flash of sword.

* bio: amanda is a third-year creative writing student. majority of her writing is selfreassurance packaged in fragmentary creative nonfiction but that’s okay. her work has been published in several places, but that’s not as important as this: she is a real writer.

* amanda blows out the lime-scented candle and opens a new document. in it, she writes:

BIO: Saturday is a third-year creative writing student at RMIT.

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As o con cially scio of c us with offee m cup love ade !

by society melbourne

Society Melbourne is a social enterprise with the vision of eliminating youth homelessness in Australia. The Coffee Cart Changing Lives is our 100% non-profit fleet of coffee carts fighting youth homelessness with every cup sold.

FOOD MENU Homemade Brownies

DAILY SPECIALS

Jaffles

HAPPY HOUR

Coffee and food combos available!

Everyday

12pm-2pm All hot drinks $2.50

Monday FREE DONUT DAY

Free donut with any coffee purchase

flavours changing every fortnight!

We’re located on Level 4 of the RMIT International Campus, 235-251 Bourke Street. Come find us!

Friday BROWNIE BARGAIN $2.00 brownies

Help us make a difference, visit today!

RUSU Little Libraries need your books RUSU are opening Little Libraries across the RMIT campuses to enable staff and students to donate and borrow books. Donate your preloved books to the nearest RUSU Info Counter.

FOR MORE INFO: www.rusu.rmit.edu.au/littlelibraries


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dysmorphia Dysmorphia isn’t in words, I can’t read it on paper. It’s in mirrors, it’s like looking through glass jars - fish tanks of insecurity. Like water, an image rippling and swirling, it changes every day. I reach in to grab it but it turns to liquid and runs through my hands.

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Bonnie Jarrett @bonnie.jpg

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Bonnie Jarrett @bonnie.jpg


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Dysmorphia

Bonnie Jarrett @bonnie.jpg


Doné dename Beer author 48

Th e L

B t h u g l i

acy pir

ons C b

The light bulb conspiracy: No, I’m not talking about the gleaming bulb of master ideas that pops above a cartoon character’s head, when directors need to signal to the audience that some great plan is about to be revealed. What I’m talking about is the systematic and intentional creation of light bulbs that have shorter life spans, forcing us into the consumer cycle of constantly replacing broken goods. But how can we tell for sure? Well, after several hours of internet surfing, I found some telling evidence - but let’s just pretend I stalked cobblestone alleyways in a trench coat hunting after criminals. To begin with, there is a light bulb that still shines after a century of use over in Livermore,

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author name

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California. The fact that a light bulb can indeed work for over a 100 years, yet we are replacing lightbulbs in our homes after a few years, is quite suss. It’s fair to say that pretty much all corporations are out to make the biggest profit they can. So it makes sense that they would sabotage their own goods, or else they would only sell about 10 light bulbs for each household, then that’s it forever! I dig deeper (the dark alleyway reveals more twists as the moon gazes solemnly from above). On December 23, 1924, the Phoebus Cartel was formed, a group of light bulb manufacturers consisting of Germany’s Osram, the Netherlands’ Philips, France’s Compagnie des Lampes, and the United States’ General Electric. This was one of the first cartels to have a global reach, meaning that the light bulb market was being controlled across most of the world. They birthed the creation of an incandescent lightbulb that moved from lasting 2000 hours to only 1000 hours. This was no easy engineering trick though - it took several years to perfect the lightbulb that would self-combust after 1000 hours of use (OK, it doesn’t actually explode but if I was in a neo-noir novel it would). Their promises of greater illumination, better quality and higher efficiency ring a false note, where a truer tune can be found in the increase of business profits. In 1926-27, the cartel sold 335.7 million light bulbs, with sales steadily climbing where in 1931 they managed to sell 420.8 million light bulbs. Other light companies were closely monitored to fall in line with this new rule and if they failed to obey, they would be heavily fined. Progress gives way to profit, and inventions serve only the individuals in power.

The Bulb Conspiracy title Light / heading

But their rule couldn’t last forever. The hero wins out in the end right? Well, the 1930s saw the downfall of the cartel, yet their legacy of dying lightbulbs, already ticking down to their grave the moment you take it out of the box, spilled forth from the cartel corpse. Some advancements have taken place yet still we watch lights flicker then die. Nowadays, traditional incandescent light bulbs are being replaced by compact fluorescent and LED bulbs that boast of 5000 hours of usage, however some are still reported to burn out before their expected time of death. Have we really changed at all from the 1930s? The allure to increase sales is a siren’s call, and businesses go towards it like a moth to a um... lightbulb-that’s-intentionally-built-toburn-out. This reaches even further than just light bulbs; car batteries last only three years, iPhones fall apart so easily: cheap and breakable replaces sturdy and long-lasting. The Phoebus cartel isn’t to blame for all of these breakdowns, so how did this idea spread to other realms? Well, in 1932, Bernard London proposed the idea of planned obsolesence, the technique of purposefully creating items to have a finite lifespan so that consumers were forced to keep buying new goods. Don’t be too harsh on him because he was trying to solve the Great Depression. Although his plan didn’t gain that much traction, it did spark little light bulbs over the heads of corporation masters all across the globe. Our world fixates on finances instead of the future, and we can already see the consequences of these actions. If everything is created to break down then where does that leave us? Sitting in the dark is not an option.

Doné Beer authorde name


Ruby Staley 50

Dreams ... and what they mean Portia Sarris @portiasplace_

Whether it’s a reccurring nightmare that keeps you up at night or that oddly specific dream that you just can’t shake, it’s safe to say we’ve all had our fair share of strange dreams. However strange, often dreams appear to remind us of the things we really, really don’t want to think about. Maybe something we have pushed far down into the depths of our subconscious. Or maybe something we just didn’t have time to think about during the waking day. As someone who has the most mundane, dull dreams (what does that say about me?), I decided to hunt down some more interesting dreamers. As we delved deep into the sleepy reveries, there was a distinctly intimate sentiment and the situation felt akin to a therapy session, buzzing with vulnerability. This sense of intimacy speaks to the way that our dreams are a raw, unfiltered representation of our subconscious fears and anxieties, over anything else. And because these are the feelings we feel most intensely, these are the emotions that drive the visions we see while we sleep. Along with a brief synopsis of each dream, I collected predictions from each dreamer as to why their minds may have conjured up these very specific scenarios. And, with some help from my good friend Google, I sought to find out what these dreams * rEaAaalLy ** mean.

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A PEST PROBLEM? - Ellanor, 20 “I am walking into the lounge room and I find my family have been eaten by rats. The rats then become people sized because of how much they had eaten. And I noticed that when I entered the room, they weren’t really fazed by me. One of them was always reading the paper.” Prediction – “The dream may have come about because I may have felt little to no sense of control over my family, particularly during stages of turmoil and change.” Meaning – To dream of rats denotes you will be deceived or injured by your neighbours or family. This is far more foreboding than reflective, in comparison to the prediction.

REAL-LIFE ROBBERY - Jess, 21 “One night, I had a dream that I could see some people breaking into and robbing the place that I worked.” Prediction – This happened to predict the future because after waking up that morning - when Jess went into work to open at 6am, the shop next to her work had been broken into. When dreaming becomes a reality – this one is way too weird! Psychic ability or de ja vu Meaning - In some cases, dreams about a robbery could symbolise feeling powerless or sad, or feeling as if you lack independence. It could also indicate being treated unfairly by someone in your life.

Dreams... and what they mean

CURIOUSITY THE KILLER - Dakota, 21 “I was at the house that I grew up in with my childhood cat. He used to go on adventures and one day he didn’t come back. My mother told me he was hit by a silver car. I saw my cat sitting on the road. I saw a silver car coming down the street very fast. It’s number plate was CURIOUSITY. CURIOUSITY drove straight over my cat. Curiosity had killed my cat.” Prediction – Maybe this could’ve been a freaky way to rationalise her cat’s death, or even revisit some of her memories from her childhood and past home. Meaning - If visitation dreams are a projection of our subconscious and imagination, then the many researchverified benefits of visits of deceased humans can certainly apply to visits of deceased pets. These experiences can be highly cathartic and immensely healing.

STEEPLE FALL - Taylor, 22 “I’m stuck on top of what seems like the Big Ben. And I’m laying on the ceiling tiles and they keep slipping. There’s no way down and no one knows I’m up there.” Prediction –“It comes when I’m in a lot of emotional turmoil or I am not in control of things” Meaning - To climb a steeple foretells that you will have serious difficulties, but will surmount them. To fall from one denotes losses in trade and ill health.

Ruby Staley


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Emily Cork

seven facts about leafy sea dragons Leafy sea dragons are wild. By far one of the most unique animals on the planet, they live a very serene life pretending to be seaweed gently swaying in the ocean. From what David Attenborough’s shown me, the deep blue sea seems like it can be a pretty full on place. I know if I lived there, I’d opt for the life of a leafy. Just chilling out, hiding from the scary dudes, and not stepping on anybody’s toes. Here’s seven facts for you to devour, and maybe slide into your next awkward silence (or tinder bio?)

1. The leafy sea dragon is one of two species of sea dragon in the world, and it is only found here! They mainly inhabit the southern waters of South Australia and Western Australia. 2. They are one of the only animals that hide by moving. Their funky, green leaflike appendages look almost identical to their seagrass habitat.
 3. It’s the male leafies that incubate and hatch the eggs, not the ladies! They have a special brood patch underneath their tail, with a tiny cup for each egg. Aw. 4. They don’t have teeth, only a long snout which they use like a straw, to slurp up shrimp and plankton. 5. They are very slow (can only move at around 0.15 km/h), and rely on their leafy get-up to protect them from predators. They can hide, but they definitely cannot run.
 6. Leafy sea dragons can change colour to suit their environment, and a male’s tail will turn bright yellow when he is ready to mate.
 7. They can’t handle wild weather! Leafies are quite fragile, and sudden changes in water pressure or depth can just be too much for them. As a result, after a storm, sea dragons can be found washed up on the sand tangled up in clumps of seaweed. :’(

Seven Facts about Leafy Sea Dragons

Emily Cork @ohdeer.art

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Playlist Alexander Beaty

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Curious to hear what a fellow Catalyst reader listens to? This issue, Alexander has taken the wheel and curated a dreamy, pensive playlist for us. Not only an oh-so-perfect ending note for the mag, but a great way to refresh your Spotify library for the spring!

Who Are You, Really? _ Mikky Ekko Wild Heart _ Bleachers Cleopatra _ The Lumineers I Know A Place _ MUNA Curious _ Hayley Kiyoko Like You Mean It _ Ruelle Looking Too Closely _ Fink Slip Away _ Perfume Genius Change Of Seasons _ Sweet Thing Perfect Places _ Lorde Symphonies _ Dan Black Younger Now _ Miley Cyrus Sand & Lead _ NEIKED, Brolin I’ll Come Crashing _ A Giant Dog catalyst

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Hands

Lily Longman


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