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The Art of Transformation Spring 2022
QUESTIONS FOR
Deepa Purushothaman, Author, The First, the Few, the Only and Co-Founder, nFormation
Q &A
A leader with first-hand experience describes the delusions that hold WOC back in life and work.
Interview by Karen Christensen
98 / Rotman Management Spring 2022
Describe some of the delusions that women of colour grapple with in the corporate workplace.
I interviewed more than 500 women for my book, and it became clear to me early on that women of colour (WOC) are working within a system of delusions. Based on my research, 10 delusions are at the heart of the corporate environment. Some of us contort ourselves to these delusions in order to fit in and get ahead, while others opt out to find new opportunities or create their own businesses. If we have any hope of changing things, we need to recognize these delusions and talk about them. The first delusion — and one of the most pernicious — is the idea that the pipeline for WOC is broken, leading recruiters to say ‘we just can’t find talent.’ That is a myth. Research shows that people tend to correlate and congregate with others like them. One study found that white people’s social networks were 91 per cent white. This suggests that
white recruiters and HR leaders also have predominantly white networks, which cultivates a white pipeline. Many of the individual WOC I met told me they could easily name 100 qualified women in their networks. The real issue is that white leaders are not looking in the right places. In addition to corporate delusions, you found that personal delusions can be just as dangerous for WOC. Please explain.
One of the biggest issues I heard repeated is that WOC feel invisible — and the world around us has contributed to this. Until maybe the last decade, we hadn’t seen ourselves represented on TV, in magazines or on the news. Growing up, most of us had to search hard for products made for our hair and skin tones. It was like we didn’t exist. Not seeing ourselves represented — or seeing ourselves represented negatively through stereotypes — affects our psyches. Despite many large corporations paying lip service to diversity and inclusion, stereotypes are alive and well. Many of the Asian women I spoke with fight the ‘model minority myth’ by forcing themselves to speak up in meetings in an effort to subvert the stereotype that Asian women are quiet and reserved, while many of the Black women I met are constantly trying to manage perceptions of the ‘angry Black woman’ at work. According to research by Coqual, almost one in five Black professionals have been mischaracterized as being ‘angry’ at work. This affects how they speak and even the facial expressions they use. Likewise, the Latina women I spoke with told me they constantly fight against the stereotype of the emotional and feisty Latina. A few of them have even hired speech coaches to practice modulating their speech. One woman said that by trying to adapt a more monotone voice, she hopes to
counter early career feedback that she was ‘too volatile.’ The truth is that delusions, microaggressions and racism build up over time. As we try to push through and prove ourselves, we internalize them, and that often makes us sick. The World Health Organization calls discrimination a health risk — in some cases even more impactful than lifestyle and health-related choices. Hands down, the biggest surprise in my research was the worrying trend among the most accomplished women of colour: we are all exhausted, suffering and yearning to find a way to keep our plates spinning. We have been taught to be grateful and thankful for being included at all, so when issues arise, we often don’t even consider pushing back. You write that sometimes, cultural norms and family beliefs also hold WOC back. Please explain.
Many women of colour come from cultures where patriarchy and misogyny run deep. Across Asia and the Middle East, in Central and South America and in parts of Africa, women’s rights are limited and controlled. Some women from these cultures struggle to find their voices, and their place in their family can be at odds with the power role they play at work. Indra Nooyi, the former CEO and chair of PepsiCo, has shared her story of arriving home to tell her mother that she’d just been named CEO. The minute she walked through the door, her mother asked her to fetch milk from the store like a good daughter. Her mother said, “You might be president of Pepsi, but when you enter this house, you’re a wife and a daughter. So leave your crown in the garage!” Growing up as the daughter of Indian immigrants, we never talked about race at home, even though it showed up everywhere, from which friends would invite us to their rotmanmagazine.ca / 99
The Delusions Holding Women of Colour Back DELUSION 1: ‘We can’t find you!’ The idea that the pipeline is broken is a myth. White recruiters and HR leaders will also have significantly white networks, which therefore cultivates a white pipeline. DELUSION 2: ‘Just be yourself.’ One of the biggest delusions is that the corporate world doesn’t require us to conform and assimilate to be successful. By working to fit into existing power structures and establishments, we lose a lot of what makes us who we are. DELUSION 3: ‘Just wait.’ We have to let go of the fairy tale of “one day” and realize that no matter what stage we are at in our careers, each action to conform is actually a decision we make, even if it might not feel like it in the moment. DELUSION 4: ‘I don’t see colour.’ The idea that big corporations are a meritocracy is a setup. The truth is, your hard work alone will not get you through. DELUSION 5: ‘Please share your thoughts.’ Most managers and executives don’t really want you to say anything unless it’s positive. If what you say causes a ripple, that makes you the problem, not the company’s outdated ways of working.
houses to the racist remarks I heard at school. My earliest memory of being different is of my mother dressing me in Indian clothes and sending me to school with a bindi on my forehead. I’m not sure I understood race and cultural differences back then. Instead, I internalized the pain and shame of being different and tried even harder to fit in. The details of our lives may differ, but if you are a woman of colour, you have probably had to deal with issues around belonging — whether it’s because of your race, ethnicity, class, gender, sexual orientation, disability — or any combination of these factors. After 22 years on the corporate fast track, you became quite ill, leading your doctor to tell you: “Your job is killing you.” Describe what happened.
Black girls and daughters of immigrants are always told by their families, ‘You are going to have to work harder to get ahead.’ It was in my brain, and it was in my bones. I became 100 / Rotman Management Spring 2022
DELUSION 6: ‘That’s too political.’ There is a belief that we can fix inclusion without talking about the hard stuff and making people uncomfortable. The truth is, we need to alter and shock company cultures in new and uncomfortable ways if we want our workplaces to reflect the change we are trying to make. DELUSION 7: ‘Diversity, equity and inclusion will fix everything.’ These days, inclusion is stated as a company priority and a CEO and board agenda item, but unfortunately, it’s still just lip service within many companies. DELUSION 8: ‘Kill or be killed.’ The definition of power can often mean being aggressive, and having power over others in corporate settings. The idea that power must be seen this way is a delusion, and the idea that this type of power should be rewarded is an even bigger delusion. DELUSION 9: ‘Capitalism trumps all.’ We talk about capitalism without talking about power. And as the global pandemic has shown us, significant challenges around power have been created and exacerbated by capitalism. DELUSION 10: ‘You got white-manned.’ This is the most important delusion to eradicate. When you are accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like oppression. We can’t have white men believing they will lose something as we rise. The pie doesn’t just have to be redistributed—it can always grow.
a productivity junkie. Sometimes I would travel to three cities in one week, skipping meals and not sleeping, just to pull off the results I was rewarded for. My superpower was outworking everyone around me. Fast forward to that day at my doctor’s office, and I felt like I was slowly dying. I had adrenal fatigue and a leaky gut, had recently been hit with shingles and had at least 15 other symptoms including hives, joint pain, headaches and extreme fatigue. “We can keep doing more tests,” my doctor told me that day, “or I can be honest with you. I think you are living to work, and that is a recipe for disaster.” She started asking questions that I had not contemplated in a really long time: What gives you joy? When do you feel most alive? What would you do if you quit? Eventually, I was diagnosed with Lyme disease, but I have actually come to see that as a gift — a message from the universe that I wasn’t on the right path. Lyme caused me to really examine who I am and what is important to me,
The New Power: 4 Rules RULE 1: ‘POWER OVER’ IS OVER If you can lead with heart and by example, creating safety for people around you, they will want to follow you out of loyalty and dedication, not fear. RULE 2: POWER WITHIN IS PARAMOUNT Women of colour need an alternative to the books that define power as being outside of ourselves. True power lies in what we have inside.
and it helped me see that I have a different superpower than I thought. My actual superpower is being able to take a setback or challenge and use it as fuel to change my life for the better.
RULE 3: POWER FOR GOOD IS STRONGER THAN POWER FOR SELF-GAIN The new power is less tied to the positions we hold, and more tied to what we value and how we stand up for the things that matter to us. RULE 4: ‘POWER WITH’ REIMAGINES THE CORPORATE TABLE It’s time for corporate tables and boards to add multiple seats so more of us are at the table and more voices can be heard.
What can WOC do to shed all of the delusions—internal, external and familial—that aren’t serving them as professionals?
We can’t shed the stereotypes that others hold about us — that is work they must do on their own; but we can look at how much these ideas are constraining us. The first step is to begin to sift through and question the messages we have received from society, our families and the structures around us. After we identify the specific delusions we want to shed, we need to listen to our own voice. Some women might do this work in therapy; others might journal or create vision boards. Everyone’s process is different. Rha Goddess, my business partner, needs to get very quiet to do work like this, so she keeps every Sunday open for meditation and reflection. For her, the process is about integrating mind, body and spirit, and she uses her faith and spirituality to do her shedding work.
is not tied to authority or a seat at the top. The truth is, we all have power; but to ensure ‘power for all’, WOC have to engage in change. The good news is that outdated definitions of power are now giving way to new values-based definitions. The women I met — and increasingly, more corporate leaders — believe that going forward, power must be used for good. The new power is tied less to the position we hold and more to what we value and how we stand up for what matters to us.
You conclude the book with four principles that emerged from your research. Tell us about the third one: Power for good is stronger than power for self-gain.
I wanted to create a new manifesto of power for women of colour because the old playbook doesn’t work for us. Chasing that type of power leaves many of us unhappy, sick and looking for greater purpose. In their book Power, for All: How It Really Works and Why It’s Everyone’s Business, Rotman School Professor Tiziana Casciaro and Harvard’s Julie Battilana describe three common fallacies about power: believing it is a thing you possess; believing it is positional; and believing power is somehow dirty and entails manipulation. We need to expand the definition to see that power
Deepa Purushothaman is the author of The First, The Few, The Only:
How Women of Colour Can Redefine Power in Corporate America (Harper Business, 2022.) She spent 22 years at Deloitte before co-founding nFormation, a first-of-its-kind community created by women of colour for women of colour. She is also a Leader in Practice at Harvard’s Kennedy School, a Fellow of The Aspen Institute and a member of the board of Avasara, which is devoted to helping Indian girls realize their full leadership potential. rotmanmagazine.ca / 101
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