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ED^rORIAL We were e x t r e m e l y g r a t i f i e d by t h e r e c e p t i o n g i v e n t o our f i r s t i s s u e ; i t was, i t seems, a s u c c e s s . 600 c o p i e s were p r i n t e d and a l l were s o l d "before 10 a.m., and i t was r e p o r t e d t h a t some s p o r t s m e n w e r e o f f e r i n g t h e i r c o p i e s t o t h e l a t e c o m e r s a t 4 d , and f i n d i n g p l e n t y o f t a k e r s . The c u r e f o r any b l a c k m a r k e t i s t o i n c r e a s e t h e s u p p l y , and so 1000 c o p i e s of t h i s i s s u e w i l l be p r i n t e d , and we hope t h a t . t h i s w i l l meet t h e demand. However, f i r s t a f f a i r s are.' a x i o m a t i c a l l y n e v e r e n t i r e l y s u c c e s s f u l I n t h e l i g h t of f u r t h e r • e x p e r i e n c e , and we hope s t e a d i l y t o improve, t h e q u a l i t y of F E L I X w i t h e a c h s u c c e e d i n g i.saue . Any s u g g e s t i o n s .and- c r i t i c i s m s a r e v e r y w e l c o m e , and i f y o u c a n n o t be b o t h e r e d t o put' a n o t e t o t h e E d i t o r i n t h e I . G . U n i o n r a c k , y o u p r o b a b l y . k n o w some members of t h e B o a r d , a t l e a s t by s i g h t , and c a n m e n t i o n y o u r s u g g e s t i o n s when n e x t y o u m e e t . I n t h i s I s s u e we a r e s t a r t i n g two f e a t u r e s e r i e s w h i c h we hope t o c o n t i n u e i n e a c h i s s u e . The f i r s t i s a " P r o f i l e " , a f e a t u r e c o p i e d u n b l u s h i n g l y f r o m a l e a d i n g Sunday n e w s p a p e r . I n i t we s h a l l , p r e s e n t p e r s o n a l i t i e s o f whom we t h i n k y o u w o u l d w i s h t o know more; s t u d e n t s p a s t or p r e s e n t , s t a f f , and i n s t i t u t i o n s . We w i s h t o a v o i d , m a k i n g t h i s a mere c a t a l o g u e of P r o f e s s o r s and U n i o n o f f i c i a l s , and s h a l l s t r i v e t o g i v e as much v a r i e t y as p o s s i b l e . F o r t h i s r e a s o n we a r e s t a r t i n g t h e s e r i e s w i t h " a P r o f i l e on t h e U n i o n b a r , f o r few w o u l d deny t h a t t h i s e x c e l l e n t • i n s t i t u t i o n has g r e a t p e r s o n a l i t y , and few know i t i n a l l i t s v a r y i n g moods. The s e c o n d new f e a t u r e i s "The D r i n k i n g Man's G u i d e t o L o n d o n " T h o s e who do n o t know L o n d o n a r e o f t e n b e s e t w i t h t h e p r o b l e m o f w h e r e t o go when t h e y want a d r i n k , f o r , o f t h e t h o u s a n d s of pubs i n L o n d o n , so few a r e r e a l l y p l e a s a n t . I n t h i s s e r i e s , t h e n , we s h a l l i n t r o d u c e you t o some of t h e b e t t e r h o s t e l r i e s i n t o w n , and t r y t o i n d i c a t e t h e f e a t u r e s o f e a c h , t h e t y p e of p e r s o n who f r e q u e n t s them, w h e t h e r t h e y be q u i e t or c o n v i v i a l , t h e k i n d o f b e e r , c l o s i n g t i m e and so o n . We t r u s t t h a t t h e s t a r t i n g of t h i s s e r i e s i n ' t h e same i s s u e as a " P r o f i l e " o n t h e b a r w i l l n u t be h e l d t o g i v e i t t o o much o f a b e e r y b i a s , b u t t h e l a t t e r i s a n o n r e c u r r i n g f a c t o r and so t h e b i a s w i l l be t e m p o r a r y .
I n our n e x t i s s u e we i n t e n d t o s t a r t an Agony Column i n w h i c h we s h a l l p r i n t any s m a l l a d v e r t i s e m e n t s y o u may w i s h t o i n s e r t . No c h a r g e w i l l be made f o r t h i s , b u t t h e a v a i l a b l e s p a c e w i l l be l i m i t e d and so we c a n n o t g u a r a n t e e t o p r i n t e v e r y ' a d v e r t i s e m e n t w h i c h may be s u b m i t t e d . To save s p a c e , a d v e r t i s e m e n t s w i l l be numbered, and r e p l i e s s h o u l d be a d d r e s s e d t o " A d v e r t i s e r No ' F e l i x " and p l a c e d In. t h e U n i o n r a c k . A d v e r t i s e r s must n o t e t h e number o f t h e i r a d v e r t i s e m e n t and c o l l e c t t h e r e p l i e s t h e m s e l v e s , but t h e y must s u b m i t t h e i r names and C o l l e g e s t o t h e E d i t o r w i t h t h e i r a d v e r t i s e m e n t .
F o r t h e b e n e f i t o f t h o s e who c a n n o t be s u r e of b u y i n g t h e i r F E L I X on F r i d a y m o r n i n g s , we a r e p r e p a r e d t o r e s e r v e a number o f c o p i e s w h i c h may be c o l l e c t e d f r o m t h e b a r . T h o s e who w i s h t o hav e t h e i r c o p i e s r e s e r v e d s h o u l d g i v e t h e i r names t o t h e E d i t o r .
C o n t r i b u t i o n s must be i n by t h e Monday p r e c e d i n g t h e n e x t i s s u e , b u t i t w i l l be a p p r e c i a t e d I f t h e y a r e s o o n e r . They s h o u l d be a d d r e s s e d t o The E d i t o r , F e l i x , C o n t r i b u t o r s must s u p p l y t h e i r names and c o l l e g e s w i t h c o n t r i b u t i o n , t h o u g h t h e y may w r i t e u n d e r sioms de plume
t h e d a t e of submitted I.C.Union. their i f they wish.
MUCH ADO ABOUT; NOTHING. Much Ado f r o m t h e D r a m a t i c S o c i e t y . R e v i e w i n g t h e I . C . D r a m a t i c S o c i e t y ' s l a s t e f f o r t , "Much Ado a b o u t N o t h i n g " , p e r f o r m e d on F r i d a y December 9 t h , ' t h e o u t s t a n d i n g s u c c e s s was M r . J o h n P r i g m o r e . Of c o u r s e he was h e l p e d by a n a p p r e c i a t i v e audience b u t perhaps Shakespeare might even have s m i l e d a t t h e s i g h t o f a s t o o p i n g b e a r d e d G e n t l e m a n s h u f f l i n g f o r w a r d t o .. t h e accompaniment o f ' " c h u f f - c h u f f , c h u f f - c h u f f " . T h i s chorus f r o m t h e a u d i e n c e u n d o u b t e d l y s i g n i f i e d Mr . Pri'gmore s • i n t e r e s t i n r a i l w a y s , B r i t i s h or o t h e r w i s e . The c h o i c e o f S h a k e s p e a r e f o r a Comedy l e d t h e a u d i e n c e • t o make i t s own l a u g h s , a n d t h i s t h e y d i d u n t i l t e m p o r a r i l y c h e c k e d by t h e a r r i v a l o f t h e R e c t o r a t t h e e n d o f t h e s e c o n d a c t . Regarding other d i s t i n g u i s h e d performances: Joan Spencer's B e a t r i c e v/as v e r y f i n e ; B r i s c o e ' s Don P e d r o e x c e l l e n t ( e s p e c i a l l y i n t h e u s e o f h i s h a n d s ) ; D e r e k Howe's B e n e d i c k was v e r y c o m p e t e n t , as was C h r i s . McKoen's D o g b e r r y . Now f o r t h e b r i c k b a t s ' . I hope t h e s e r e m a r k s won't r u i n t h e c a r e e r s ( d r a m a t i c o r o t h e r w i s e ) o f the players concerned. I t was u n f o r t u n a t e t h a t some o f t h e s u p p o r t i n g c a s t were n o t u p t o s t a n d a r d ; H e r o i n p a r t i c u l a r was a m i s t a k e i n c a s t i n g , a n d the Messenger might have been b e t t e r employed i n s c e n e - s h i f t i n g . I t was f e l t t h a t o n l y t h e b r e e d i n g i n t h e more e x p e n s i v e s e a t s , and t h e R e c t o r ' s p r e s e n c e amongst t h e " s h i l l i n g s " p r e v e n t e d v i o l e n c e f r o m a c t u a l l y b r e a k i n g o u t on t w o o c c a s i o n s . A t t i m e s t h i s p e r f o r m a n c e was n o t u p t o t h e u s u a l D r a m a t i c S o c i e t y s t a n d a r d . One r e m a r k h e a r d f r o m t h e c h e a p e r s e a t s as t h e a u d i e n c e d i s p e r s e d , " I f I h a d known t h e p l a y was b y S h a k e s p e a r e I w o u l d n ' t h a v e come", shows what a w o n d e r f u l j o b i s done, b y o u r schools . 1
Much Ado f r o m t h e M i n e s . I f S h a k e s p e a r e ' s bones r e m a i n e d i n e r t t h e n i g h t t h e Mines a t t e n d e d t h e D r a m a t i c S o c i e t y ' s p r o d u c t i o n o f "Much A d o a b o u t N o t h i n g " t h e n t h e r e i s no f o r c e w i t h i n them, a n d t h e r e s u r r e c t i o n o f the body i s n o t f o r W i l l i a m . S i x t e e n t h c e n t u r y a u d i e n c e s w e r e r e p u t e d l y h a r d oh t h e p l a y e r s , b u t t h e s e m i n e r s w o u l d have been o u t s t a n d i n g i n a m e e t i n g of .Communists b e i n g a d d r e s s e d b y C h u r c h i l l on ' P r i v a t e E n t e r p r i s e f o r t h e Masses'. L e s t t h a t c r e a t e an u n f a i r i m p r e s s i o n i t s h o u l d be a d d e d t h a t t h e b a r r a c k i n g was w i t t y , s e l d o m v i c i o u s a n d b o r n e most m a n f u l l y b y t h e a c t o r s . P e n e t r a t i n g q u e s t i o n s w e r e a s k e d o f Don J o h n ' s v i l l i a n y , B a l t h a s a r ' s manhood a n d A n t o n i o ' s ' m a k e - u p , a n d t h e s p e e c h e s on H e r o ' s c h a s t i t y w e r e s u b j e c t e d t o a most r i g o r o u s examination. \ Benedick r e c e i v e d great acclamation f o r twice answering q u e r i e s f r o m t h e mob w i t h c o m p l e t e n o n c h a l a n c e , and f u r t h e r d i s t i n g u i s h e d h i m s e l f , w h i l s t l o o k i n g i n t h e a r b o u r , b y q u a f f i n g two p i n t s o f b e e r h a n d e d o u t f r o m b a c k s t a g e b y an anonymous s t a g e - h a n d caught u p i n t h e n p i r i t o f t h e o c c a s i o n . And B a l t h a s a r ' s r e n d e r i n g o f "Hey Nonny No" s o f i r e d t h e a u d i e n c e t h a t t h e y c o u l d n o t b e r e s t r a i n e d from j o i n i n g in. t h e c h o r u s ; t h e f a c t t h a t t h e r e s u l t s o u n d e d more l i k e " O l d M c D o n a l d h a d a f a r m " c o u l d d o u b t l e s s b e , a 1 1 r i b u t ed t o ov e r - e x u b e r a n e e . T h o s e who a c c u s e m i n e r s o f b e i n g h a r d - b i t t e n m a t e r i a l i s t s , immune t o t h e f i n e r f e e l i n g s o f man, w o u l d h a v e b e e n a g r e e a b l y s u r p r i s e d a t t h e p o i n t when B e a t r i c e f i n a l l y s u b m i t t e d t o B e n e d i c k ' s embrace a n d l o v e was t r i u m p h a n t . The a u d i e n c e was so o v e r w h e l m e d t h a t i t i n s i s t e d on an e n c o r e a n d t h e w h o l e T h e a t r e shook w i t h e m o t i o n , bosoms.were f i l l e d t o o v e r f l o w i n g w i t h g o o d w i l l a n d t e n d e r n e s s ; t h e o p e n - h e a r t e d n e s s o f t h a t moment was r e c o r d e d f o r a l l t i m e b y a g r e a t g e n e r o u s c r y f r o m t h e b a c k o f "Nov/ l e t P r i g g y h a v e a got
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Ado As t h e c u r t a i n f e l l f o r t h e l a s t t i m e , a f e e l i n g o f g r e a t r e l i e f f i l l e d t h e c a s t and l u s t y v o i c e s s a n g i n j o y o u s u n i s o n t h e " S o n g - h i t " o f t h e P l a y . Make-up was p u l l e d , r u b b e d and s q u e e z e d o f f ; c r u m p l e d c o s t u m e s and t i n w e a r w e r e f l u n g a s i d e , and . s t a g e h a n d s p r o c e e d e d w i t h gay abandon t o c l e a r t h e i r h i t h e r t o v a l u a b l e .. sets, aside . In a s h o r t time the S o c i e t y , i n mixed but not u n r e s p e c t a b l e a t t i r e , was a t t a c k i n g t h e m a s s e s o f f o o d ; s p e e c h e s were made, o f e x q u i s i t e s h o r t n e s s ( R o l a n d Cox s a i d goodbye y e t a g a i n ! ) t h e n t h e c a s t , q u a f f i n g good a l e , b e l l o w e d l u s t i l y t o the p i a n o p l a y i n g of Old Leonato ( D a v i d G r e e n f i e l d ) , w h i l e t h e s t a g e hands p r e p a r e d t h e i r o n e - a c t f a r c e . By t h i s t i m e a l m o s t a n y t h i n g was f u n n y , and t h i s p r o v e d t o be a l m o s t a n y t h i n g . The f a r c e o v e r , i n d i v i d u a l t u r n s r e v e a l e d much h i d d e n t a l e n t ; Bob G i g g s a n g a f i n e Cowboy s o n g , d e s p i t e t h e f a c t t h a t he knew few o f t h e w o r d s ; S p i k e B r i s c o e c o m p e n s a t e d f o r l a c k o f w o r d s by r e n d e r i n g a t g r e a t s p e e d G i l b e r t i a n w o r d s t o s o m e t h i n g r e s e m b l i n g S u l l i v a n ' s m u s i c , and a f i n e I r i s h s k e t c h . By t h i s t i m e t h e p a r t y was made, and s a t f o r many h o u r s . The e x u b e r a n c e l a s t e d w e l l i n t o t h e n i g h t , and t h e mood s o f t e n e d p l e a s a n t l y as RegÂť G i l l p r e s e n t e d h i s R e c o r d programme i n s u b d u e d l i g h t i n g * As pangs o f h u n g e r b e g a n t o be f e l t t h e r e m a i n i n g s t a l w a r t s s o u g h t b r e a k f a s t a t J o e L y o n s ' - and b e g a n t o t h i n k o f t h e n e x t Play J
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G r e a t a n n o y a n c e i f o f t e n o c c a s i o n e d by t h e o l d boy who will s a y " I remember when t h i s was G r e e n f i e l d s — " , b u t i t seems we h a v e few i n our m i d s t who h a v e t h e m e n t a l s p a n t o b o r e us w i t h t a l e s o f h o l l y h o c k where now s e a t s a r e warmed a t t h e window r a d i a t o r . H o w e v e r , by much p a t i e n c e , p e r s e v e r a n c e and l o n g s e r v i c e , t h e t a l e o f The B a r , o f t h e U n i o n b u i l t a r o u n d i t and t h e H i s t o r y c o n n e c t e d w i t h i t h a v e e n a b l e d t h i s w r i t e r t o s a y : " I h a v e met p e o p l e who remember when " Q u e e n i e ' s f a t h e r , J i m P e a c o c k , was t h e f i r s t b a r m a n , s t a n d i n g i n a s t a l l o u t s i d e t h e p r e s e n t U n i o n b u i l d i n g - w i t h g r a s s and no b u i l d i n g s i n f r o n t o f h i m - s e l l i n g s a n d w i c h e s , r o l l s and b o t t l e d b e e r . T h i s was t h e f i r s t C o l l e g e B a r i n t h e C o u n t r y , and i n a few y e a r s i t s p l a c e i n h i s t o r y was a s s u r e d by t h e f o r m a t i o n o f 4 o l u b s c l o s e l y c o n n e c t e d w i t h i t and by i t s f i r m i n s t a l l a t i o n n e x t t h e l a v a t o r y . The 2 1 , 2 2 , Chaos & L i n k s C l u b s made t h e B a r a c o n g e n i a l m e e t i n g p l a c e , a good t a l k i n g - s h o p , a p l a c e f o r w a r r i o r s t o r e t u r n t o t e l l t h e t a l e and l i c k t h e odd wound ( f r o m r a g o r h o n e s t game), and o f c o u r s e a p l a c e i n w h i c h t o l i b e r a t e g r e a t e x u b e r a n c e - f o r s u c h i s t h e j o y o u s outcome of b i b u l a t i o n . S u c h i t was made, and s u c h i t r e m a i n s . Ted S m i t h , j o i n i n g J i m P e a c o c k i n 1927 ( j u s t a f t e r I was b o r n ) , s o o n became s t e e p e d i n t h e g r e a t t r a d i t i o n s o f t h e p l a c e . He t e l l s w i t h o b v i o u s j o y o f t h e days when women w e r e n o t a l l o w e d i n t h e U n i o n p r e c i n c t s e x c e p t f o r t h e U p o e r E n t r a n c e H a l l - any i n f r i n g e m e n t s b e i n g f i r m l y d e a l t w i t h by t h e P r e s i d e n t of t h e U n i o n . I n 1930 Ted s e r v e d L a w r e n c e o f A r a b i a w i t h a m i l d and b i t t e r , w i t h as l i t t l e f u s s as when he gave G e n e r a l Smuts a l a r g e w h i s k e y when t h a t W o r t h y was i n v e s t e d w i t h two c h a i n s of o f f i c e i n one day ( t h e o t h e r a t t h e G u i l d h a l l ) . The B a r i s e v e r c h a n g i n g i n c h a r a c t e r ; i n h a l f an h o u r i t can chang e f r o m a q u i e t p l a c e t o h a v e s c h a t , t o -he most h i l a r i o u s l y e a r - s h a t t e r i n g c o n c e n t r a t i o n o f h u m a n i t y t h i s s i d e of W a p p i n g . L o n g may i t s r a f t e r s r i n g i n r o u s i n g t u n e f u l s o n g . ''
IMPERIAL COLLEGE ASSOCIATION FOOTBALL CLUB. HOLLAND December 1949.
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"Honkers i n H o l l a n d " A f t e r much p r e p a r a t i o n d a t i n g b a c k t o A u g u s t , p a l l y G o s s , armed w i t h IV o f e v e r y t h i n g n e c e s s a r y f o r a C o n t i n e n t a l S o c c e r ,our i n c l u d i n g p l a y e r s , r e p l a c e d h i s s h o e s a f t e r c o u n t i n g the Doys pas t h e b a r r i e r at L i v e r p o o l S t . , and e v e n t u a l l y /got through h i m s e j , o n l y to f i n d e v e r y b o d y i n a l l b u t t h e s e a t s ' ^ f ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ n Qilav t o u r was l a u n c h e d ! S i m i l a r p r o c e d u r e s ensued at P a r k e s t o n quay, b o y s e v e n t u a l l y sett-led" i n the saloon, that i s w i t h the • the e x c e p t i o n , of two f r o m Wale-s and a S e c r e t a r y who u n a n i m o u s l y a g r e e d t h a t f o r more t h a n one r e a s o n , t h e S a l o o n E a r p r o v i d e d the b e s t assurance of a healthy c r o s s i n g ! F o l l o w i n g ham and eggs f o r b r e a k f a s t a t the Hook, where some e m b a r r a s s m e n t was c a u s e d u p o n e n c o u n t e r i n g a f e m a l e s l o t m a c h i n e t o g a i n e n t r y t o t h e " H e e r e n " , we b e t o o k o u r s e l v e s t o A m s t e r d a m , and a f t e r l u n c h , t o our f i r s t e n c o u n t e r w i t h t h e h u t c h s t u d e n t s . An i n t e r e s t i n g i n n o v a t i o n h e r e was "he u s e of c a n a l s f o r t o u c h l i n e s , and. A r t h u r B r i s c o e was t h e a g r e e d r e p r e s e n t a t i v e o f I . C . f o r t e s t i n g t h e d e p t h o f same- he f o u n d them k n e e - d e e p . The game o p e n e d i n f i n e s t y l e , a t l e a s t a l l b u t t h e p h o t o g r a p h o f t h e k i c k - o f f w h i c h n e v e r m a t e r i a l i s e d , and a f t e r two p a s s e s Spud H a y t e r p r o m p t l y d e c i d e d t h a t he h a d h a d e n o u g h f o o t b a l l (22.25 s e e s . ) and was removed t o t h e " p a v i l i o n " , w h e r e he s l e p t f o r t h e r e s t o f t h e game, n u r s i n g a w a t e r e d k n e e . E a s t l a n d M i n o r l a t e r d e c i d e d t h a t he t o o h a d h a d e n o u g h , and was c a r r i e d o f f w i t h a t w i s t e d s e n s e o f humour, w h i c h r e m a i n e d t w i s t e d f o r t h e r e s t o f t h e t o u r .
A f t e r e a c h team h a d s c o r e d two g o a l s , and d i v e r s d e s c e n t s h a d b e e n made t o r e t r i e v e l o s t b a l l s f r o m the- s u r r o u n d i n g c a n a l s , we r e t u r n e d t o b a l l o t f o r t h e o r d e r of w a s h i n g u n d e r one c o l d t a p . E v e n t u a l l y a r r i v i n g at the S o c i e t e i t i n Amsterdam, T a f f y W i l l i a m s s e t t l e d h i m s e l f b e t w e e n two of o u r t h r e e t e e t o t a l l e r s (shame to e n s u r e h i m s e l f o f a f a i r s u p p l y o f a n y t h i n g t h a t was g o i n g . S u c h low cunning'. N e e d l e s s t o s a y , t h i s h a d t h e d e s i r e d e f f e c t , and s o o n we w e r e t o see T a f f y and Don. B o w t e l l t r y i n g t o d e c i d e who s c o r e d our o t h e r two g o a l s , h a v i n g b a f f l e d c o m p l e t e l y o u r o p p o n e n t s by r e p e a t e d l y a s s u r i n g them t h a t we h a d won 4-11 T a f f ' s c o n s t i t u t i o n l a t e r s t o o d a h e a v y m e a l , b u t Don. was c o n t e n t t o s l u m b e r i n t h e B i l l i a r d ' R o a m , t h o u g h l a t e r he was r e s u r r e c t e d and f r e q u e n t l y h a d t o be d i s s u a d e d f r o m p u t t i n g h i s h e a d i n t h e f i r e . O t h e r members o f t h e p a r t y t o u r e d t h e n i g h t l i f e o f Amsterdam and r e t u r n e d w i t h enough m a t e r i a l t o w r i t e a K i n s e y r e p o r t I N e x t m o r n i n g we t r a v e l l e d t o D e l f t , where a g a i n a m a t c h was t o be p l a y e d t h e same a f t e r n o o n . T h i s t o o k p l a c e on an e x c e l l e n t g r o u n d i n t h e s u b u r b s of The Hague, w h i c h was r e a c h e d by means o f a c a r e v i d e n t l y c o n s t r u c t e d b e f o r e t h e I n d u s t r i a l R e v o l u t i o n . Of t h e o r i g i n a l 18 c y l i n d e r s o n l y two w e r e s a i d t o be i n o p e r a t i o n , one o f t h e s e f a i l i n g f a s t . T h i s c a r r i e d 9 i n s i d e , w i t h s e a t i n g a c c o m m o d a t i o n f o r two more on the r e a r bumper, w h i l s t k i t f o r b o t h teams was c a r r i e d on t h e numerous p r o j e c t i o n s o u t s i d e . S e a t e d i n t h i s and d r i v i n g en t h e r i g h t ( b u t w r o n g ) s i d e o f t h e r o a d , was a somewhat h a r r o w i n g e x p e r i e n c e . T h i s game we l o s t 9-0, t o t h e s t r o n g e s t team put out a g a i n s t us - t h e 1 2 t h man b e i n g s e n t o f f some m i n u t e s a f t e r t h e s t a r t ' . At l e a s t one r e f e r e e o f our p a r t y w o u l d p r e f e r t o f o r g e t i n c i d e n t s o f t h i s game. The e v e n i n g was a c o m p l e t e h o n k e r s s e s s i o n (5 p.m.-5 a.m.), t h e h i g h l i g h t s b e i n g a b e e r r a c e i n mrhich J o h n H o u g h t o n s u r p r i s e d u s a l l w i t h h i s l i g h t n i n g d e s p a t c h o f h a l f o f P i l s e n e r , and D e r e k Hand's k n o w l e d g e a b l e e x p o s i t i o n o f t h e p r o ' s and c o n ' s o f t h e m a r r i e d s t a t e . As a r e s u l t , on F r i d a y m o r n i n g we w e r e a l l s p l i t up b e c a u s e o f s t a g g e r e d h o u r s o f r i s i n g , t h o u g h i t i s known t h a t some t o o k t h e o p p o r t u n i t y o f s e e i n g D e l f t - u n f o r t u n a t e l y B u c k r o y d was u n a b l e t o g e t i n t o m o t i o n i n any s e n s e o f t h e w o r d , p r o b a b l y due t o a s u r f e i t o f f r i e d e g g s . H o w e v e r , t h e l a s t m a t c h was t o be a t 2.00 and b e t w e e n 1.45 and 2.15 most of t h e p a r t y g a t h e r e d on t h e D e l f t m u d - f l a t s f o r t h i s l a s t e n c o u n t e r . By t h i s t i m e e v e r y o n e was f a r f r o m f i t f o r f o o t b a l l , and a l l c r e d i t i s due t o t h o s e who p l a y e d h e r e , some f o r t h e t h i r d t i m e i n 4 d a y s . The m a t c h was e v e n t u a l l y drawn 1-1, though i t i s s a i d t h a t had T a f f y W i l l i a m s used the r i g h t p a i r of h a n d s and c a u g h t t h e r i g h t b a l l when he was s u d d e n l y c o n f r o n t e d w i t h (he s a y s ) 18 m u l t i c o l o u r e d s p h e r e s f l a s h i n g g o a l w a r d s , t h e game m i g h t h a v e b e e n saved'. L a t e r t o t h e a c c o m p a n i m e n t o f "Come on t h e 10 men and t h e Captain." a v e r y t i r e d P e t e . V e s s e y was spurred t o i n t e r c e p t a p i g e o n m o v i n g f a s t down t h e l e f t w i n g . N e e d l e s s t o s a y he d i d n o t c a t c h i t The e v e n i n g ' s e n t e r t a i n m e n t commenced i n a l o c a l "pub.", c o m p l e t e w i t h d i n n e r and s p e e c h e s , a f t e r w h i c h , t h e D e l f t v e r s i o n c f t h e " Y a r d " was i n t r o d u c e d . T h i s c o m p r i s e d a g l a s s b o o t ( s t i e f e l ) o f c a p a c i t y a b o u t 5 p i n t s . F o r e m p t y i n g t h i s a t any s t a g e of i t s j o u r n e y r o u n d the t a b l e , the poor u n f o r t u n a t e p r e c e d i n g the w i n n e r had. t h e d o u b t f u l p l e a s u r e o f p a y i n g f o r a r e f i l l . A f t e r a t o k e n s i p by t h e D u t c h P r e s i d e n t , who s t a r t e d t h e s t i e f e l on i t s j o u r n e y , Spud H a y t e r d i d l i k e w i s e , t h i n k i n g i t v e r y s a f e so t o do w i t h a l l but 5 p i n t s s t i l l r e m a i n i n g , whereupon a Dutch student s e i z e d the a r t i c l e and d r a i n e d i t ! T h i s was t h e h a r d l u c k s t o r y o f t h e t , ; u r . T h i s e v e n i n g f i n i s h e d c o m p a r a t i v e l y e a r l y , at about 4 a.m. P r e v i o u s l y a r r a n g e d , a l m o s t a l l met n e x t m o r n i n g t o v i s i t The Hague f o r s h o p p i n g , w h e r e Immense q u a n t i t i e s of a l l k i n d s o f s u s t i n e n c e , b o t h l i q u i d and s o l i d , w e r e p u r c h a s e d . Due b a c k a t D e l f t l a t e r i n t h e a f t e r n o o n , we d u l y a r r i v e d and were t a k e n by t h e D u t c h boys t o R o t t e r d a m , w h e r e we ended up i n a C h i n e s e R e s t a u r a n t f o r a f a r e w e l l d i n n e r , w h i c h a l l ate but A r t h u r B r i s c o e , who had g o o d r e a s o n s o f h i s own f o r n o t p a r t a k i n g . From h e r e we j o u r n e y e d b a c k t o R o t t e r d a m s t a t i o n , wher e many d i s p o s e d o f
r e m a i n i n g P t t t c h c u r r e n c y by b u y i n g l a r g e amounts o f c h o c o l a t e . Hence t o t h e B o a t , and f a r e w e l l H o l l a n d . But oh what a c r o s s i n g . a w a i t e d us Memories. Bon. B o w t e l l ' s " l i f e s i z e " t o y s o l d i e r ( a n d i t s r a t t l e ) t h e o b j e c t o f much s p e c u l a t i o n a t t h e Customs--. E a s t l a n d M i n o r ' s never e n d i n g s u c c e s s i o n of " b l a c k s " Danny would, h a v e been g r e e n w i t h e n v y ! P e t e . V e s s e y ' s s p e e c h e s and. a c c o m p a n y i n g facial contortions. Techwyn J o n e s • t e m p o r a r y p r o m o t i o n t o C a p t a i n t o f a c i l i t a t e Anglo-Dutch r e l a t i o n s . A r t h u r B r i s c o e - under the i n f l u e n c e - s e a r c h i n g the D e l f t U n i o n f o r some l o s t j e w e l l e r y ( a r i n g we b e l i e v e ) . Gordon L o d g e t o Bernard. Buckroyd. " F o r P e t e s sake k e e p q u i e t , y o u r e a 1 w a y s t a 1 k i n g'.' W a l l y Goss a l w a y s t o be seen, m u l t i p l y i n g o r d i v i d i n g by 17, a l s o h i s c o l l e c t i o n o f t i c k e t s o f a l l k i n d s , i n b a t c h e s o f 17. B r i a n ^ ' o l l i n s o r ( f r e q u e n t l y ) " i t ' s a good j o b P a t c a n ' t s e e me now" 4 men s e a r c h i n g The Hague f o r a s w e a t e r f o r a c e r t a i n fiancee. !
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t h a n k s a r e due t o : - (a) a l l D u t c h s t u d e n t s , f o o t b a l l e r s o r n o t , gave us s u c h a w o n d e r f u l t i m e . (b) D a v i e s T u r n e r , T r a v e l A g e n c y , whose s e r v i c e was most e f f i c i e n t - f u t u r e t o u r s p l e a s e n o t e . ( c ) W a l l y Goss whose u n t i r i n g e n e r g y i n o r g a n i s i n g t h e t o u r , made i t s s u c c e s s a c e r t a i n t y . (d) P e t e V e s s e y , u n t i r i n g i n h i s e f f o r t s on t h e f i e l d , o f p l a y a t a l l t i m e s .
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H a v i n g s e a r c h e d G u i l d s , M i n e s & R.C.S. f o r someone t o s a y how g o o d t h e C a r n i v a l was, b u t f i n d i n g p e o p l e who c o u l d remember o n l y t h a t i t was g o o d , i n f u r y and d e s p e r a t i o n I h a v e h a d t o say i t m y s e l f . U n a s h a m e d l y I avow t h a t , a ) n e v e r h a v e I had' s u c h a good t i m e , b) - n e v e r h a v e I s e e n so many p e o p l e b o t h ' d r u n k and h a p p y , c ) n e v e r h a v e I f o u n d so many p e o p l e who remember so l i t t l e a b o u t a n i g h t t h e y e n j o y e d so much. H a l f an h o u r a f t e r t h e a d v e r t i s e d s t a r t , F r a n k S h e p h e r d and G e o f f F i s h w i c k p u t i n t h e l a s t d r a w i n g p i n and s a n k t h e i r f i r s t w h i s k e y s . By t e n o ' c l o c k t h e I n f e r n o was a most t e m p t i n g encouragem f o r m e r r y m a k i n g - i f H e l l i s l i k e t h a t ! H o s t e l rooms e m p t i e d and f i l l e d ( I i m a g i n e ) and t o w a r d s 12.30 DCH w i t h o n l y h a l f a f a n c y d r e s s l e f t was f r a n t i c a l l y s e a r c h i n g f o r c a b a r e t p e r f o r m e r s . J u s t i n t i m e P e t e H a y w a r d f l o a t e d up t h e s t a i r s , w i t h e v e r y a p p e a r a n c e of c a l m . A f a r t o o l i v e l y a u d i e n c e • w a s b r o u g h t i n t o s l i g h t s u b m i s s i o n by P e t e r F o s t e r ( i n t h e c h a i r as u s u a l ) and t h e show was o n . A p p a r e n t l y i t was good, a p p a r e n t l y p e o p l e l a u g h e d and s a n g somehow t h e c a s t remembered wher e t h e y w e r e a t t h e r i g h t moment. From t h e n on, r e s p o n s i b i l i t i e s s h e d , my memory i s v a g u e f o r t u n a t e l y p e r h a p s ! H i l a r i t y c o n t i n u e d u n t i l 5 o r so ( I t h i n k ) when ham and c o f f e e s e t t l e d p l e a s a n t l y on v i o l e n t l y i l l - t r e a t e d s t o m a c h s . I g a t h e r Reg G i l l p l a y e d some r e c o r d s f r o m 4 o ' c l o c k t h a n k s R e g ! T h a n k s a l s o t o a l l who h e l p e d i n t h e masses o f w o r k a l o t o f you. w e r e M i n e r s & R.C.S,* t o Mr. S e e r s f o r t h e i n s p i r e d p i a n o p l a y i n g and t h a n k s t o t h e C a r n i v a l S u b - C o m m i t t e e w h i c h S p e n t vso many e n j o y a b l e e v e n i n g s i n my r o o m . F o o t n o t e : Who p i n c h e d my p o t ? " D.C.HOWE.
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The W i n d s o r C a s t l e , w h i c h t h e i r r e v e r e n t s o m e t i m e s r e f e r by I t e i n i t i a l s , s t a n d s a t t h e c o r n e r o f P e e l S t r e e t and Campden l R o a d i n K e n s i n g t o n . P e e l s t . i s a t u r n i n g t o t h e l e f t h a l f way C h u r c h S t r e e t , and may he r e a c h e d f r o m C o l l e g e e i t h e r by 52 bus v i a t h e Goat and t h e P r i n c e o f W a l e s . The W i n d s o r i s a q u i e t pub; s o f t l i g h t i n g , d a r k oak p a n e l l i n g , p o l i s h e d c o p p e r c a n s and e x c e l l e n t s c e n e r y . T h e r e i s a l w a y s a c h e e r f u l f i r e i n w i n t e r , and b e i n g one o f t h e b e s t K e n s i n g t o n pubs i s f r e q u e n t e d m a i n l y by t h e R i g h t s o r t of p e o p l e - i c i on p a r l e a n g l a i s . I n t h e summer, d r i n k s a r e s e r v e d i n t h e w a l l e d g a r d e n b e h i n d t h e S h e r r y b a r , and t h i s makes i t t h e most p o p u l a r r e n d e z v o u s i n L o n d o n a t l u n c h t i m e on a f i n e S u n d a y , and t h e g r o u n d w o r k may be l a i d t h e r e f o r many an. e x c e l l e n t Sunday a f t e r n o o n . A w o r d o f w a r n i n g h e r e - one n e e d s t o be t h e r e by 12 o ' c l o c k t o be s u r e o f a s e a t i n t h e g a r d e n , and I t i s a l m o s t u s e l e s s t o e x p e c t l u n c h b e f o r e 2 o'clock. "• i Other e s s e n t i a l d a t a : - C h a r r i n g t o n ' s beer, v e r y w e l l k e p t , t h e I P A b e i n g l / 8 d and t h e b i t t e r and m i l d l / 4 d a p i n t . C l o s i n g t i m e s a r e 3 p.m. and 10.30 p.m., and on S u n d a y s t h e u s u a l 2 p.m. and 10 p.m. No b a r m a i d s , b u t t h e h e a d barman's name i s M a u r i c e s m a l l , d a r k and s l i g h t l y d e a f . No m e a l s a r e s e r v e d , b u t one c a n u s u a l l y g e t a r o l l o f one k i n d or a n o t h e r . F u l l marks f o r t h i s e x c e l l e n t h o s t e l r y . to Hil up or
HEARD IN COURT. I t was a t i n y c o u r t room.,used o n l y when t h e m a i n one was f u l l . The m a g i s t r a t e , p r o s e c u t o r and d e f e n c e , a c c u s e d and w i t n e s s e s , two r e p o r t e r s and one s p e c t a t o r f i l l e d i t t o c a p a c i t y . Mr. G u e s t , t h e m a g i s t r a t e , wore a b l a c k l o o k . " C a l l D.C.H.," s a i d t h e B e a k , ' - and t h e c a s e was on. T h i s m i s c r e a n t had t r i e d t o i n t e r f e r e w i t h the a p p r e h e n s i o n of a c o l l e a g u e . "He t o o k t h e l a w i n t o h i s own h a n d s . T w e n t y S h i l l i n g s f i n e and t w e n t y s h i l l i n g s c o s t s " . , s a i d t h e B e a k . T h i n g s l o o k e d b a d . The f a t e of t h e n e x t c u l p r i t was much t h e same. "You h a v e b e e n v e r y s i l l y and t h i s i s a most u n f o r t u n a t e a f f a i r " , was t h e comment. T h e r e a p p e a r e d t o be no c a s e a g a i n s t C l e g g and he was a s k e d t o l e a v e , t a k i n g a l l h i s money w i t h h i m . G e o r g e was n o t so f o r t u n a t e ; Mr. G u e s t j u s t d i d n ' t b e l i e v e h i m and f i n e d h i m £1 w i t h s i m i l a r c o s t s . C a r d e r was a c c u s e d of s t r i k i n g an o f f i c e r . He i n s i s t e d d e s p i t e c o u n s e l , t h a t i t ' h a d p r o b a b l y b e e n i n t e n t i o n a l and he h a d b e e n " u n d e r t h e i n f l u e n c e " a t t h e t i m e . T h i s p l e a s e d t h e Beak who s a i d , "But f o r t h e h o n e s t way I n w h i c h y o u gave y o u r e v i d e n c e , I s h o u l d undoubtedly have sent you t o p r i s o n . I s h a l l t h e r e f o r e f i n e y o u £1 f o r o b s t r u c t i o n and £1 f o r a s s a u l t w i t h £1 c o s t s " . I.C. s i g h e d w i t h r e l i e f . Thus w i t h t h e o t h e r f i n e s t h e Law was £11 richer . The m a g i s t r a t e r e f u s e d t o s a y he t h o u g h t t h e m a t t e r was n o t t o o s e r i o u s , s a y i n g " I w i l l h a v e no f u r t h e r h a n d i n t h i s a f f a i r " . We a l l l e f t . G u i l d s Boanerges devotees s u f f e r e d c o n s i d e r a b l e shock t h i s term on d i s c o v e r i n g t h a t t h e 4 t h y r . M i n e r s h a d a r i v a l o f u n q u e s t i o n a b l y g r e a t e r a n t i q u i t y . T h i s i s on v i e w o u t s i d e - t h e U n i o n - t h e p r o u d owners b i g g e s t p r o b l e m i s how t o g e t i t away a g a i n w i t h minimum l o s s of d i g n i t y or l i f e . S u g g e s t i o n s t o M e s s r s . H i l l , N o r r i s , H a y w a r d and B a r n e s .
8 LETTERS TO THE EDITOR. The
E d i t o r of F e l i x .
Sir, I w o u l d l i k e , as C h a i r m a n o f t h e I . C . U n i o n E n t e r t a i n m e n t s Committee, t o r e p l y t o the l e t t e r from " W a l l f l o w e r " p r i n t e d i n the l a s t i s s u e of F e l i x . We a g r e e e n t i r e l y w i t h t h e s e n t i m e n t s e x p r e s s e d and w h i l e we v i e w w i t h some s a t i s f a c t i o n t h e i n c r e a s e i n p o p u l a r i t y o f t h e S a t u r d a y n i g h t " h o p s " , we do n e v e r t h e l e s s w i s h t o overcome as much as p o s s i b l e t h e o v e r c r o w d e d c o n d i t i o n s . 1 w o u l d a s s u r e W a l l f l o w e r t h a t much t i m e has b e e n s p e n t r e c e n t l y , b o t h toy my C o m m i t t e e and by t h e I . C . U n i o n C o u n c i l , i n t r y i n g t o f i n d a s o l u t i o n . As a r e s u l t , a d i f f e r e n t a r r a n g e m e n t I s t o be t r i e d t h i s t e r m s o t h a t t h e U p p e r D i n i n g H a l l can be a v a i l a b l e as w e l l as t h e Gym. d u r i n g t h e w h o l e o f t h e e v e n i n g . At t h i s p o i n t , I w i s h , t o make an a p p e a l . The a r r a n g e m e n t s w i l l n o t o p e r a t e s a t i s f a c t o r i l y u n l e s s we h a v e some c o - o p e r a t i o n f r o m t h e p e o p l e a t t e n d i n g t h e " h o p s " . My C o m m i t t e e c o n s i s t s o f s i x p e o p l e o n l y and w i t h a l l o f them on d u t y e v e r y S a t u r d a y n i g h t , we h a v e o n l y ' j u s t enough p e o p l e t o k e e p t h i n g s r u n n i n g . We h a v e no s p a r e p e r s o n s t o s t a t i o n a t e a c h d o o r o f t h e U n i o n c h e c k i n g m e m b e r s h i p c a r d s . N o r h a v e we s u r p l u s e n e r g y w i t h which t o e v i c t u n i n v i t e d guests e i t h e r w i t h or without l o s s o f a p p a r e l . I f W a l l f l o w e r " , o r anyone e l s e , can. f i n d s u f f i c i e n t p e o p l e w i l l i n g t o s t a n d by a l l . t h e doors d u r i n g the whole o f e v e r y S a t u r d a y e v e n i n g , t h e n maybe we c a n c a r r y o u t t h e suggestions. I hope we s h a l l f i n d c o n d i t i o n s somewhat b e t t e r w i t h t h e new a r r a n g e m e n t s . I t ' s u p t o t h e p e o p l e who a t t e n d t o h e l p t o make them w o r k . I f t h e y d o n ' t - w e l l t h e n e x t s t e p w i l l h a v e t o be a d m i s s i o n by t i c k e t o n l y w i t h a l i m i t e d number o f t i c k e t s and I f o r one d o n ' t want t o s e e t h a t s t a t e o f a f f a i r s b r o u g h t about. , /' Yours e t c . , R. G I L L • 1
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My d e a r F e l i x , I'm v e r y g l a d t o meet y o u ! As y o u r E d i t o r went t o some c h i v a l r o u s p a i n s t o make c l e a r I am s e r e n e l y i n c a p a b l e o f h a v i n g k i t t e n s ( e x c e p t p e r h a p s , b e t w e e n o u r s e l v e s , around, t h e t i m e o f my f l a m i n g p u b l i c a t i o n ) so "no one k a i n ' t p i n n u t h i n ' on me". Thus, my p l e a s u r e on y o u r b i r t h d a y was s t r i c t l y a v u n c u l a r , y e t I hope t o s t a n d y o u a p o t - o f m i l k - F e l i x on y o u r f u t u r e a n n i v e r s a r i e s , and many o f 'em. B e l i e v e me, y o u ' r e v e r y welcome t o t'.P\ o l d Man. So welcome i n d e e d t h a t I have thought i t prudent t o a r r a n g e w i t h y o u r E d i t o r t o g e t h o l d o f you through, h i m i f y o u r p u b l i c a g a i n m o n o p o l i s e s you completely. I t r u s t t o s e e y o u wax o l d a n d w i s e , grow i n t o a s t r o n g a n d v i r t u o u s b u t w i t h a l , a. m e r r y C a t . B e i n g y e t y o u n g y o u may h a v e some t r o u b l e w i t h b i t s o f D o g - L a t i n , b u t y o u r E d i t o r w i l l t r a n s l a t e f o r yon " N i l i l l i g i t i m u s carborundum" F e l i x ! B l e s s y o u r f u r and w h i s k e r s . Yours, "PHOENIX" P.S. Y o u m i g h t m e n t i o n t o y o u r E d i t o r t h a t m i n e i s f o n d o f b e e r .
... 9 • SPJ3RT . Owing t o e x t r e m e s h o r t a g e o f s p a c e i n t h i s i s s u e we r e g r e t , t h a t we s h a l l have t o d e f e r u n t i l our n e x t i s s u e t h e r e p o r t s on N e t b a l l Row i n s and t h e 6 a s i d e S o c c e r w h i c h we h a d h o p e d t o p r i n t t h i s time UNIVERSITY CROSS-COUNTRY CHAMPIONSHIP. F i v e I . C . teams r a n i n t h e U n i v e r s i t y C r o s s - C o u n t r y C h a m p i o n s h i p s h e l d a t Roehampton l a s t t e r m . The c o n d i t i o n s f o r t h e c o u r s e were' f i n e b u t r a t h e r w i n d y . From a f i e l d o f 168, c o m p r i s i n g 28 t e a m s , W a t t s ( I . C . ) and Ede s e t a f i e r c e p a c e a t t h e o u t s e t • b u t s o o n r e l i n q u i s h e d t h e l e a d t o G r i g g s , B a r r e t t , S h o r t and W h i t l o c k ( I . C . ) G r i g g s m a i n t a i n e d h i s l e a d t o t h e end t h u s b e i n g t h e f i r s t man home f o r t h e f o u r t h y e a r i n s u c c e s s i o n ; h i s t i m e of 2 5 m . 2 4 s e c s . was a r e c o r d . W h i t l o c k ran. a v e r y f i n e r a c e f i n i s h i n g s e c o n d i n 25m.56secs t o s e t a new I.c'. r e c o r d . The n e x t e i g h t I.C. r u n n e r s t o f i n i s h were G i g g , W a t t s , S a d l e r , B a g l e y I.C. Simpson, H e s s l i n g , McKechnie and F a w c e t t b u t u n f o r t u n a t e l y (6o~ p o i n t s ) l o s t the- cup t o Q.M.C. (49) w i t h K i n g s t h i r d ( 7 0 ) . In the i n t e r - c o l l e g e Championship Mines were v i c t o r i o u s f o r t h e f i r s t t i m e i n many y e a r s . I t was a w e l l d e s e r v e d s u c c e s s and G u i l d s w e r e t h e r u n n e r s - u p . UNIVERSITY S I X - A - S I D E . On December 1 0 t h t h e m a t c h e s i n t h e L o n d o n s i x - a - s i d e S o c c e r c o n t e s t wer e p l a y e d a t M o t s p u r P a r k . The I.C.'A' s i d e r e a c h e d the f i n a l , o n l y to l o s e i n " e x t r a time t o U n i v e r s i t y College. SPORTS RESULTS. HOCKEY.
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We h a v e b e e n a s k e d t o p r i n t t h e names o f t h e F e l i x T h e y a r e as f o l l o w s : Editor: Sub E d i t o r : Sports E d i t o r : A d v e r t i s i n g Manager:
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Members:- M a r y M a y e r , J . M i d s l e y (R C S ) , J . S . B u r t o n (R C S ) P . G . T a y l o r (R C S ), J . T a y l o r (R S M),D.C.Howe (C & G ) , D . J . P o w e l l (C & G ) , R . G . D a l t o n (C k G ) , C . M . H a r g r e a v e s ( C h e m . T e c h . ) .