http://felixonline.co.uk/archive/IC_1973/1973_0325_A

RETAINED POPULAR

If

you

are

an

1973

FREE!

undergraduate,

you

are entitled to a grant of £480 a year.

N e x t year this w i l l be raised to £500.

If y o u are l u c k y enough to live i n hall

No.

325

Action for Higher Grants NOW Ten days ago

Imperial College

U n i o n rejected

a rent s t r i k e .

Never-

y o u the full parental c o n t r i b u t i o n , y o u

theless, a substantial motion on grants w a s passed almost unanimously, and

are p r o b a b l y not all that badly off.

t h e u n i o n e x e c u t i v e is s t i l l p u s h i n g f o r a c t i o n .

"notional

e l e m e nt"

in

the

grant

for

b o a r d a n d lodgings is £275 i n L o n d o n (£240 elsewhere). eat. chez

Mooney

three

times a

day,

gion of £230 - £240 —

i n c l u d i n g £11 a

year new halls levy.

Only house. you?

T h e N U S is

o r g a n i s i n g d e m o n s t r a t i o n s a n d a " D a y of A c t i o n " .

Well, we

or

W h a t about the other 2,800 of L i v i n g in a digs w i t h breakfast

politicians amongst autonomy issue.

us organise a C a m p a i g n .

This year it's grants.

Last year

regularity,

is w a s

over

the

B u t b e f o r e y o u g o off i n t o a c o r n e r ,

curl up, cover your face w i t h F E L I X a n d go to sleep over what might appear while exercise.

A worth-

I hope y o u ' l l agree, s i n c e most of us rely s o l e l y on grants

for our l i v e l i h o o d d u r i n g the a c a d e m i c year. N o p r o p a g a n d a , p r o m i s e : just facts.

Here they are.

Mooney

just for

food

(about

of

we

in

privileged

universities

under

the

are

grants

re-

rate

grant.

Every

undergraduate

(not

living

home) at I m p e r i a l College to £480 (subject

at

is entitled

to parental c o n t r i b u -

tion), regardless of where he comes f r o m or where he lives i n L o n d o n .

T h i s is

not the case for students i n further (as to

higher)

education

technical

students

and

are

art

on

—

for

colleges.

discretionary

T h e discretion is that of

the

E d u c a t i o n A u t h o r i t y , a n d i t is

their decision h o w m u c h (if any) grant is to be awarded.

Since each L E A acts

differently, geographical inequality also

in the grant.

occurs.

M o s t grant-receiving students are liable

L i v e i n a flat, a n d y o u c a n expect to

to parental contributions, as assessed b y

be l u c k y to pay £6 a week right through T h a t ' s £234 —

vacations, too.

course

Local

at a figure of roughly £330 — £55 more for

Of greatly

awards.

fectories in the University) a n d we arrive than allowed

been raised since.

These

lodgings—add

the cheapest

parents.

T h a t figure was fixed in 1965, and hasn't

opposed

ing term, a n d £2 a week retainer d u r i n g £218

if he isn't, y o u only qualify for £275 —

example,

vacations. So between O c t o b e r a n d J u n e pay

tended spouse is a student too. Because,

the

p r o v i d e d costs, say, £6.50 a week dur-

you

advice w o u l d seem to be

A t least, not unless y o u r i n -

scheme, for there is a mandatory

a l l k n o w that every year, w i t h m o n o t o n o u s

to b e t h e i n a n i t y o f it a l l , f o r g e t t h e " a c t i o n " a n d e x a m i n e t h e f a c t s .

1,200 students live i n hall

"don't".

Posters based on this photo-

graph a n d s l o g a n are already g o i n g up in a l l U S K colleges.

S u p p o s i n g that y o u

it p r o b a b l y only costs y o u i n the re-

government's

subject to a means test on your

o r student house, a n d y o u r parents pay The

REQUEST

"P the J and FD"

NEWSPAPER OF IMPERIAL COLLEGE UNION 23rd J A N U A R Y ,

BY

a

£345

means test.

It has been

estimated

w i t h food, a n d £70 more t h a n the no-

that only about 2 5 % of students q u a l i -

tional element.

fying for parental contributions receive

a cut of lowed

T h i s is equivalent

to

them

one-third i n the a m o u n t a l -

for

everything

clothes,

books,

travel

in full.

mately 1971.

T h i s allowed

three stages:

for

were based

on

previously

Evidence

suggests

ex-

receive o n

average

50%

of this figure

Only

students w i t h parents

some

i n cash a n d k i n d . having

a

" r e s i d u a l i n c o m e " (after allowances) of less than £1,100 get the full grant w i t h out d e d u c t i o n f r o m their L E A , a n d they

pretty m u c h the same as

pay £1 for every £10 they earn over this.

Cost

Index"

has

the o r d i n a r y cost index, but leaving out

And,

thinks

any pay rise they may get.

like

that

been

"Student

calculated —

£90.

contribution

to £465 for 1971-72, £480

perienced rates of inflation.

A

parental

students not obtaining the full parental

a rise i n

for 1972-73 a n d £500 i n 1973-4. These figures

average

the m i n i m u m a w a r d of £50, is a p p r o x i -

else.

T h e current grant level was negotiated in

The

contribution, leaving aside students o n

and

carpets

and

cookers

other things that d o n ' t affect

and

us, and

of

course, parents lose

10%

T h a t is a t h u m b - n a i l sketch of

of

the

weighting everything that does correctly

grants situation. G r a n t s have lost £80 i n

(more or less).

value since 1971 i n L o n d o n .

A c c o r d i n g to this, the

rise i n costs i n 1971-2 (academic was 7 . 9 % .

year)

Married

T h e rise in grant was 2 . 9 % .

women

are very

m u c h the

p o o r relations of their spinster counterparts.

W h e n the grant levels were changed

A n d even

they

are better

off

in 1971, so was the floor of the parental

than students i n F . E . colleges.

means test scale.

students i n a l l sectors are losing m o n e y

T h i s h a d an interest-

ing effect on the increases i n the total

parental

amount p a i d i n grants by L o c a l E d u c a -

69%

tion A u t h o r i t i e s . ments

increased

Whereas by

12%,

—

contributions

increased

by

or, at least, the a m o u n t that

their

pay-

should

the

total

tributions d i d .

have been paid in parental c o n -

N o t everyone is l u c k y enough to get £480 a year, even i n the university sector. and

If

y o u ' r e female

t h i n k i n g of

a n d a student,

getting

married,

the

Many

through the parental means test.

The

NUS,

hardly

surprisingly, has

thus decided to m o u n t a c a m p a i g n to change the situation.

EXTRAORDINARY GENERAL MEETING Thursday 1300 hrs Great Hall - COME!

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 197 3

FELIX

Page 2

Phosphorous the Jobrot and Ferocious Din Part six of a serialisation of the book by S. J. Swailes T h e jungle was d a n k a n d d a r k a n d depressing. Huge ferns towered over the trio, and the ground was thick with botanical debris.

Strange sounds assaulted the explorers' ears, hooting, screaming — was that a cry for help i n Mongolian, that a n invitation to l u n c h i n Serbo-Croat?

They would never know.

With the Twigworm bulldozing a path through the undergrowth, they pressed on.

It w a s v e r y h o t . T h r o u g h t h e d i f f u s e g r e e n light that bathed t h e jungle, they c o u l d see only a f e w steps ahead.

Things rustled i n the shrubbery, crashed through the ferns overhead, a n d howled i n the greenness. D i d other, heavier footsteps echo their own?

' S o r r y , lads.

H e says, even i f L o r d Penney does w i t h o u t , we can't m o r e t h a n a £250 r i s e . "

have

" F o r once, dear l a d , y o u have a point.

W e seem to be m a k i n g very little progress through this unsavoury jungle, a n d I get the distinct impression that tiny carnivores of a n u n f r i e n d l y n a t u r e a r e scaling m y left leg.

I therefore propose that w e r e t u r n to the beach.

A l l those i n favour — a h — favour? Excellent — carried unanimously.

Off y o u go, dear o l d treader of t h e way, take us to the beach."

MOTION to

b e p u t to

E x t r a o r d i n a r y jobs

SUPPLEMENTARY GRANTS The be

following

proposed

will

at t h e E G M o n

such

and

as

food,

transport

have

risen faster than ever

before.

In t h e l a s t t w o m o n t h s prices

rose

which

is an annual

36

per

therefore

living

rises.

inflation for

will

of

Union Supplepay-

time the cost T h e rapid makes

it

of

time

or

away

to

have

many

will

be

faced

choice

of

looking

White

M e e t i n g

gofhg

Further,

Paper

takes

any bargaining

rights

grants

as

with

wages.

W h a t is the purpose of a student union w h i c h cannot bargain

or take

grant ing

any action

increases

stiff

This

without

penalties

makes

a

fac-

a n d fines.

grants

paign

absolutely

makes

it c l e a r

be

for

cam-

urgent a n d that

it

must

linked to the demand

clear

this

reactionary

Government

out of

to

Tory

office.

rate

essen-

now. September

b e too late,

the

cent

rate

This

students

more money

dents

alone

per

Grants as cash

each

tial

6

demands

ments

of

by

cent.

mentary

Heath's

for

In r e c e n t m o n t h s p r i c e s o f

rents

in exam

without proper food.

motion

Thursday.

essentials

T h u r s d a y ' s

G e n e r a l

stuwith for

This solves (1)

Union

therefore

re-

to:

Campaign for Supplementary Grants linked to t h e d e m a n d to clear the Tory Government from office.

(2)

The

Immediately elect from the U n i o n meeting a n 8 member action committee to organize the following campaign. a) A o n e d a y strike on Thursday, February 8th a n d a demonstration in preparation for the day of action o n February 21st. That in order to ensure the maximum possible support f o r t h e c a m p a i g n the action committee must contact a n d work with London Region NUS a n d all student bodies, arrange speakers at meetings a n d organize meetings where student unions are weak or n o n existent.

Further, contact local Trades councils. Union Branches and shop stewards committees for support for the campaign. end

of

motion.

MARTINS' BIT a&emmber

a

TO

of bu£ines&

MEMBERS

OF COUNCIL

T h e B u m p h for next C o u n c i l is n o w i n the pigeon holes i n the U n i o n Office.

Please collect it.

TO

DEPARTMENTAL

REPRESENTATIVES

Because of the difficulties the President has h a d i n foretelling the U . G . M . m a n d a t e w i t h regard to organising departmental meetings, it appears that some departmental reps are not c a r r y i n g out their duties, either to the U n i o n o r the department.

on

IXag

Cfjaritie*

•selection T h e R a g C h a r i t i e s Selection w i l l take place at the U . G . M . o n the 18th F e b ruary. A n y b o d y w h o w o u l d l i k e to n o m i n a t e charities should send details to Paul Hosking, R a g (Carnival) C o m mittee C h a i r m a n , as soon as possible, please.

at

"Er, Ferocious," said Phosphorous, " d o you think we're doing the right thing?

C o u l d n ' t w e go b a c k t o t h e b e a c h a n d perfor the Twigwormery there?" haps wait A s it happened Ferocious h a d been thinking along those lines himself.

tfcfjetmle

WLuion

Twigworm

"Which

looked

w a y is that,

please?"

he

asked.

" O h really," said Ferocious sharply, "with y o u i n t h e lead w e m u s t have left a t r a i l like the M l extension."

H e peered hopefully around.

They seemed surrounded b y impenetrable jungle. " E h ? " thought Ferocious.

The unlikely had occurred again.

O n a l l sides rose u p a wall of solid greenery; like K e w Gardens with s o u n d effects. " O h , " s a i d Ferocious, "can anyone remember which way the iolly old beach lies, h a h a . " N o b o d y could. " U r n , " said Ferocious.

They were i n a quandary.

A dark, green, impenetrable quandary. " W e must think, rationalise, come to a decision," said Ferocious, staring hopefully into the green menace all around them.

E v e n as h e spoke, P h o s p h o r o u s gave a cry.

A thin green tendril h a d encircled his l e g , a n d w a s p u l l i n g h i m off i n t o a b u s h .

"Ooooooergh!" he said. " G r a b hirn, T w i g ! " shouted Ferocious. B u t it w a s too late, i nsi di ous ropes h a d encircled t h e p r o t e s t i n g J o b r o t , a n d h e w a s fast disappearing into the undergrowth.

Ferocious a n d the T w i g w o r m lunged after their wriggcaptured friend, b u t as they moved, ling boneless arms grasped a n d held them.

Even the Twigworm's huge strength was not enough to break free of the arborial grasp.

Deep i n the w r i t h i n g mass of greenery, a vast sap-dripping m o u t h s w u n g open.

"Eaten by a rhododendron," thought Ferocious, quite calmly, " w h a t a n e n d for the last o f t h e D i n s . " T h e trio w e r e w i t h i n seconds of a shrubbery death, w h e n a voice rang out. " D o w n boy, leave!" T h e greenery grasp relaxed, a n d Ferocious a n d C o . were able to stagger to t h e i r feet a n d greet t h e i r saviour.

H e h a d all the appearance of a small tree. " W e l l , " t h o u g h t F e r o c i o u s , " i f y o u c a n be eaten b y a plant, I suppose y o u can be rescued by one."

"I do apologise," said t h e tree, "Fido does tend to be a little rough, I hope he hasn't damaged y o u at a l l . " "No, no, thank y o u , " said Ferocious, " W e seem to be a l l right, it w a s l u c k y y o u came along when y o ud i d . " " O h , " said t h e tree, " F i d o w o u l d n ' t have hurt you, just held y o u until I arrived."

Phosphorous doubted that b u t said nothing.

"Let m e introduce myself," went on the tree, "I'm George Deciduous, the Jungle Controller.

H a n g o n a minute, a n d I'll come o u t . " So saying the t r u n k of the tree wriggled and suddenly unzipped.

From inside stepped a dapper little m a n i n pinstriped suit a n d bowler hat.

"That's better," he remarked, " i t gets

meeting*

Please note that this schedule is liable to revision.

January 2 5 t h — E . G . M . ; Grants C a m paign; E l e c t i o n of N . U . S . Secretary; P . G Affairs Officer; M o t i o n s for N . U . S . c o n M o t i o n o n Indoference of Exeter.

China.

F e b r u a r y 1st: A t h l e t i c G r o u n d C l u b A . G . M . (before U n i o n Meeting). C o n stitutional changes.

E l e c t i o n of N . U . S . delegation.

F e b r u a r y 15th: Selection of R a g C h a rities.

M a r c h 1st: H u s t i n g s of President, Deputy President, Secretary a n d E d i t o r of F e l i x .

M a r c h 1 5 t h : R e s u l t of E l e c t i o n s ; E l e c t i o n of N o n - E x e c u t i v e Officers; Second Reading of constitutional changes.

T h e r e w i l l , hopefully, be time f o r m o tions of these meetings.

confused.

v e r y stuffy i n there, b u t i t ' s t h e o n l y w a y I can move through the jungle without being eaten b y a passing privet, or such like. N o t all o u r flora are as friendly as F i d o here," " Y o u surprise me," said Ferocious.

"Now," went o n George, "we must get you out of here; y o u must come to m y outpost a n d have a c u p of t e a . " T h e adven* t u r e r s felt i n n o p o s i t i o n to a r g u e , so t h e y followed George, w h o h a d assumed his t r u n k again, into t he undergrowth.

"Don't worry," said George as they trudged along, " w i t h Fido coming too, nothing w i l l dare attack u s . " They h a d not actually noticed Fido coming too, b u t n o w that they looked, they c o u l d see no t r a c k b e h i n d t h e m , a huge section of the jungle was for slowly moving i n their wake.

"Very reassuring," said Ferocious. a few minutes ploughing After only through the jungle, they broke out into a clearing.

I n the m i d d l e stood a tree.

Or was it a tree? T h e first forty feet w e r e covered i n bark, a n d sprouted branches at appropriate intervals.

Above the forty foot m a r k , however, there p e r c h e d a suburban house complete w i t h lace curtains and television aerial.

"Very pleasant, isn't i t ? " said George. " W h e n I first came here, they transported m y h o u s e f r o m W i l l e s d e n , so t h a t I ' d f e e l at h o m e . V e r y t h o u g h t f u l , don't y o u t h i n k ? " "Very," said Ferocious. . "Let's go i n , " said George, " a n d get the kettle on." They approached the tower, a n d George p r o d u c e d a k e y f r o m h i s pockets A s he was fiddling with the lock o n t h e c u n n i n g l y h i d d e n door at t h e foot of t h e tower, the clearing seemed to become smaller. " O h , F i d o ! " said George, "Stay, boy! go back, s i t ! " T h e greenery flowed back, a n d subsided i n a long coil around the tower; " H e really is a marvellous watchbush, y o u know," said George, opening his front door and leading the trio inside.

The Twigworm could only just squeeze in, b u t managed it somehow.

From the now guest-filled entrance hall there led a narrow winding stairway, u p the middle of the tower.

With much pushing and shoving they managed to persuade the T w i g w o r m u p the l o n g staircase, a n d o u t o n to t h e platf o r m o n w h i c h George's house rested. T h e view over the jungle was magnificent.

A great heaving carpet of greenery lay before them.

It rose a n d fell like some sleeping serpent i n the throes of a nightmare.

In the distance they could m a k e out the beach which they h a d left such a short time before.

Behind them the jungle stretched out as f a r as they c o u l d see.

"So m u c h for the walk to the other side of the island idea," thought Ferocious, what a fool he h a d been. H i s o u t of character self-criticism was interrupted b y George, " D o come i n , "said the Jungle Controller, "and we'll see a b o u t that c u p of t e a , " T h a t d i d n o t s e e m s u c h a b a d idea, so i n they went.

George's house was small a n d tidy.

The front r o o m into w h i c h they squeezed displayed a f r i n g e d sofa, a n d plaster d u c k s i n flight o n the wall.

"Make yourselves host, a n d v a n i s h e d

at home," said their into the kitchen.

" V e r y c o s y , " s a i d F e r o c i o u s , c r u s h e d be-* tween the Twigworm a n d the wall.

The poor Twigworm was not designed for small suburban dwellings.

H e tried to sit very still, so as n o t t o b r e a k a n y t h i n g .

Phosphorous perched o n a n upright chair i n the corner.

There came a clatter from outside.

"What's that?" asked Phosphorous, " c a n y o u see, F e r o c i o u s ? " F r o m h i s T w i g w o r m see dominated position Ferocious could nothing.

"It's only the w i n d , " h e said hopefully.

W i t h a crash of It w a s n o t o n l y t h e w i n d . splintering plywood, George's front door burst in.

T w o figures charged into the room.

"Donna

nobody

move!" said Dino

Confetti.

DOWNTOWN . . . . . . . is a learning experience, a n event, rather t h a n a conference. It's a w o r k s h o p for L o n d o n students w h o want to see for themselves what's going o n w i t h — h o u s i n g , play, redevelopment a n d p l a n n i n g , alternative e d u c a t i o n , transport, etc. — b y meeting the people w o r k i n g i n these areas; b y going a r o u n d L o n don, talking and looking.

W i t h the help of activities. E a c h g r o u p ideas a n d experiences rate ideas for future

these people, we are devising a n extensive list of w o r k s h o p w i l l take one of the areas, l o o k at it i n some de pt h, share of student c o m m u n i t y a c t i o n i n L o n d o n — perhaps geneschemes i n y o u r o w n neighbourhood?

T h e workshops are o n H o u s i n g , P l a y , P l a n n i n g , Schools, M e n t a l H e a l t h , T r a n s p o r t , Welfare R i g h t s , I m m i g r a n t s a n d Dossers. T h e w o r k s h o p starts o n F r i d a y at 7 p . m . at I m p e r i a l College U n i o n . R e g i s t r a t i o n fee is just 75p. W h y not go a l o n g a n d f i n d o u t what it's a l l a b o u t ? O r r i n g 580 0966 d u r i n g the week.

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 1973

FELIX

Page 3

sion is a percentage of t h e p r e m i u m p a i d . T h e more you pay, the more the broker gets.

FEEIX FIHANCIA££Y How to lose

money

without really T h i s week, FELIX F I N A N C I A L L Y departs from its n o r m a l f o r m a t . S i n c e t h e i n c e p t i o n of t h e p a g e last t e r m , our financial adviser, D E R E K E. C U M M I N G S , insurance broker a n d iconoclast, has been asking s o m e p e r t i n e n t q u e s t i o n s o n b e h a l f of s t u d e n t s w h o a r e t h i n k i n g a b o u t the w o r l d b e y o n d t h e i r f i n a l s , a n d also m a k i n g some fairly strong c o m m e n t s o n the f i n a n c i a l s c e n e in g e n e r a l .

N e x t w e e k , h o w e v e r , he r e v e r t s t o h i s o r i g i n a l r o l e i n I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e — t h a t of a G e n e r a l S t u d i e s lecturer. O n W e d n e s d a y , J a n u a r y 3 0 , he w i l l be g i v i n g t h e first o f four l e c t u r e s o n f i n a n c i a l s u b j e c t s .

S o n o w , F E L I X is about to cross-examine Derek C u m m i n g s a b o u t that l e c t u r e , w h i c h i s t o b e e n t i t l e d " H o w to Lose M o n e y w i t h o u t Really D y i n g . " W e l l , t h e t i t l e i s i n t r i g u i n g , s o let's find o u t m o r e .

FELIX: W h a t e x a c t l y i s t h e t i t l e of n e x t w e e k ' s meant to m e a n ?

dying

FELIX: How

d o y o u s u b s t a n t i a t e that

argument?

CUMMINGS: A n Economist survey dated 18th J u l y 1 9 7 0 shows that t h e t o p s i x i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s t a k e a b o u t fifteen y e a r s t o p a y b a c k d o u b l e w h a t a p o l i c y holder pays in p r e m i u m s o n a n e n d o w m e n t p o l i c y . M e a n w h i l e , a C e n t r a l S t a t i s t i c a l Office report dated M a r c h 1 9 7 2 states c a t e g o r i c a l l y that t h e p o u n d i s h a l v i n g i t s real v a l u e i n a b o u t 8 or 9 y e a r s .

FELIX: A r e y o u s a y i n g that a n y i n s u r a n c e i s a w a s t e of t i m e a n d a p o t e n t i a l w a s t e of m o n e y ?

CUMMINGS: Let m e p u t it t h i s w a y . If y o u h a v e n o f i n a n c i a l CUMMINGS: obligations, forget all about insurance. O n the It m e a n s t h i s . T h a t u n l e s s y o u a r e c a r e f u l a b o u t o t h e r h a n d , i t i s m y f i r m o p i n i o n that y o u n g w h a t k i n d of i n s u r a n c e p o l i c y y o u b u y , y o u s t a n d people s h o u l d d o a l l they c a n to s a v e vigort o w a s t e a l o t of m o n e y . If y o u e x a m i n e t h e w a y ously for s o m e objective, w h i c h m a y be a long m o s t insurance c o m p a n i e s operate, y o u w i l l see w a y s h o r t of r e t i r e m e n t . B u y i n g a h o u s e , f o r that m o s t of the p o l i c i e s t h e y s e l l t o p e o p l e w i s h e x a m p l e . A s f o r life a s s u r a n c e , i t ' s fine a n d v e r y i n g t o t a k e o u t life a s s u r a n c e a r e e n d o w m e n t u s e f u l — p r o v i d i n g there i s a n e e d f o r p r o t e c t i o n . p o l i c i e s — the sort where y o u p a y p r e m i u m s for FELIX: a fixed numbe r of years a n d c o l l e c t a lump s u m W e l l , y e s , I suppose w e a l l agree in principle at t h e e n d . If y o u d i e i n t h e m e a n t i m e , t h e c o m that s a v i n g f o r t h e f u t u r e i s a g o o d t h i n g . W h a t p a n y w i l l , of c o u r s e , p a y o u t . B u t if y o u l i v e , y o u w o u l d y o u s u g g e s t a s t h e b e s t f o r m it s h o u l d w i l l find y o u a r e a c t u a l l y l o s i n g m o n e y o n t h e take? deal.

CUMMINGS: I h a v e s a i d t h i s b e f o r e , a n d I'll s a y it a g a i n .

I n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s m i s l e a d t h e p u b l i c into b e l i e v i n g that e n d o w m e n t - t y p e p o l i c i e s are best for t h e p u b l i c , w h e n i n fact t h e y a r e m e r e l y b e s t for t h e i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s . T h e s e p o l i c i e s v e r y skilfully entangle t w o factors concerning insura n c e — t h e protection factor and the savings factor. W h e n it c o m e s to p r o v i d i n g for your d e p e n d e n t s i n c a s e of y o u r d e a t h , i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s a r e v e r y g o o d . B u t if y o u l i v e , a n d y o u r p o l i c y b e c o m e s a n i n v e s t m e n t f o r later life or retirement, then e n d o w m e n t policies are diabolically uncompetitive.

FELIX: If t h i s i s t r u e , w h y h a v e t h e i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s been s o successful in m i s l e a d i n g the p u b l i c ?

CUMMINGS: B e c a u s e insurance is a n emotional business.

E v e r y o n e n e e d s i n s u r a n c e of s o m e k i n d . B u t t h e insurance c o m p a n i e s spend fortunes on promoting only those k i n d s of policy w h i c h w i l l be most p r o f i t a b l e to t h e m s e l v e s .

FELIX: Y o u s a y w e a l l n e e d i n s u r a n c e of s o m e k i n d ?

CUMMINGS: Y e s . If y o u o w n a m o t o r c a r , t h e l a w o b l i g e s y o u to h a v e i n s u r a n c e . If y o u m a r r y or h a v e other d e p e n d e n t s , i t ' s a pretty u n r e a s o n a b l e m a n w h o doesn't think to b u y insurance a s protection for t h e m i n c a s e of h i s d e a t h . In b o t h c a s e s , i t ' s a m a t t e r of f i n d i n g t h e b e s t p o s s i b l e p o l i c y t o fit the c i r c u m s t a n c e s . A n d e n d o w m e n t p o l i c i e s a r e not it.

FELIX: A l l right, but w h y d o y o u s a y i n s u r a n c e c o m p a nies give the public a b a d deal on endowment p o l i c i e s a s a f o r m of i n v e s t m e n t ?

CUMMINGS: B e c a u s e t h e v e r y b e s t of the i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s t a k e s o m e t h i n g l i k e fifteen y e a r s t o d o u b l e y o u r money. But this country is currently taking only eight to ten years to halve the p u r c h a s i n g power

B e c a u s e I t a k e a r a t h e r different v i e w of t h e j o b I a m doing. I think m y company's long-term interests are best served by giving the best possible service a n d thereby gaining our c l i e n t s ' respect a n d trust. Certainly, I c o u l d talk a c l i e n t into taking o u t a p o l i c y w h i c h w o u l d bring i n a fat c o m m i s s i o n , b u t that o u t l o o k i s , i n m y v i e w , a short-sighted one. I gain more by taking t h e t r o u b l e to t h i n k a b o u t a c l i e n t ' s real i n t e r e s t s , both at the present a n d in t h e future. I w o u l d hope, for example, that what I have s a i d here w o u l d make a n y student stop a n d think for a m o m e n t before he runs out a n d buys insurance.

B u t I think I have s a i d enough for the m o m e n t .

I have a w h o l e lot m o r e to s a y at m y General S t u d i e s lecture next w e e k a n d I shall be m o r e t h a n h a p p y t o a n s w e r a n y other q u e s t i o n s a t t h a t time.

of t h e p o u n d . O n that s c a l e , t h e i n s u r a n c e c o m panies are on the best end of the deal by a very long way.

lecture

FELIX: Y o u ' r e s a y i n g that i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s a r e c o n men, then?

FELIX: S o h o w d o y o u justify your o w n p o s i t i o n ?

CUMMINGS:

CUMMINGS: P u t y o u r m o n e y i n t o a b u i l d i n g s o c i e t y . It c o s t s o n l y a c o u p l e of q u i d t o o p e n a n a c c o u n t , a n d y o u g e t i n t e r e s t o n i t. F u r t h e r m o r e , it p u t s y o u , a s a n i n v e s t o r , at t h e t o p of t h e l i s t w h e n it c o m e s to g e t t i n g a m o r t g a g e — a n d t h a t ' s s o m e t h i n g y o u w i l l b e v e r y l i k e l y to w a n t i n the f u t u r e . J u s t c o m pare t h e t w o m e t h o d s of s a v i n g for a moment.

Insurance c o m p a n i e s take your valuable p o u n d s today a n d your gradually less valuable pounds o v e r , s a y , t h e next fifteen y e a r s . A t t h e e n d of the p e r i o d , t h e y ' l l m a y b e p a y y o u b a c k d o u b l e the p a p e r v a l u e — b u t i n v e r y m u c h d e v a l u e d currency. W i t h house purchase, y o u reverse the process. Y o u borrow somebody's valuable pounds today a n d repay them w i t h d e v a l u i n g money. A t the s a m e t i m e , y o u ' r e b u y i n g a c o m m o d i t y w h i c h is a l w a y s i n c r e a s i n g i n real v a l u e . F u r t h e r m o r e , that i n c r e a s i n g v a l u e i s m o r e t h a n e n o u g h t o offset t h e i n t e r e s t y o u p a y f o r y o u r b o r r o w i n g .

T h e r e ' s n o q u e s t i o n a b o u t w h i c h i s the b e s t v a l u e .

THE SELFCONGRATULATORY PRESS The

Evening Standard of January 4 t h w a s not

unlike a n y other headline

"Police

Evening

Standard. There

Brain-drain worries

totally unconnected Word-game

was a

Yard",

a

clue of " B u t t o c k s "

and the usual bullshit singing the praises of t h e standard of the Standard.

O n e day, i n their quest for self-superlatives a n u statistical one-upmanship over " T h e other London Evening paper", " O u r competitor", the Standara and t h e N e w s might w e l l reveal something of passi n g i n t e r e s t b u t u n t i l t h a t t i m e w e ' l l h a v e to b e satisfied with " W e broke the stripper s e x orgy s c a n d a l 3 7 m i n u t e s a n d 16 s e c o n d s before the other London Evening paper".

That copy of the Standard on January 4 t h w a s o b s e s s e d w i t h t h e n u m b e r o f p a g e s it c a r r i e d i n 1972, c l a i m i n g about 2 0 0 0 more than the previous y e a r . W e l l , t h a t r e a l l y c l i n c h e s it f o r m e . W h a t a great paper. M u s t just d a s h out a n d waste 3 pence.

A n d i n t h e first t h r e e d a y s o f 1 9 7 3 , it c o n t i n u e d , w e have already h a d 3 6 more pages than in t h e corresponding three days of 1 9 7 2 . G o s h , I thought.

Isn't t h a t t r e m e n d o u s . B u t j u s t a s I w a s a b o u t t o h a n d over m y 3 p I r e m e m b e r e d that J a n u a r y 1 s t w a s a S u n d a y last year a n d the E v e n i n g papers mercifully don't come out on the Sabbath . . . G o d shall provide sanctuary from the Devil.

It g e t s a b i t m u c h , t h o u g h , d o e s n ' t i t ? — " t h e story w e forecast last w e e k " . T h e " e x c l u s i v e " w h i c h is i n every paper. " F i r s t with the n e w s " .

N e v e r : " S o r r y a b o u t that s t o r y y e s t e r d a y , c h a p s .

'Fraid w e made a bit of a Henry of it, w h a t . "

T a k e t he S t a n d a r d ' s sister paper, t he m i n d l e s s Express. Every f e w years in the post-war e r a they s t a g e a n e v e n t n o t u n l i k e t h e O l y m p i c g a m e s . It i s an international occasion w h i c h takes place i n different localities around the w o r l d a n d t h e CUMMINGS: Express s e n d s out its intrepid team o f reporters to S p e n d a s little a s p o s s i b l e to a c h i e v e t h e m a x i b e first w i t h t h e s p o r t . It's c a l l e d t h e " W e ' v e f o u n d m u m p o s s i b l e c o v e r . It c a n b e d o n e c h e a p l y . I Martin B o r m a n n " game and a few weeks ago t h e k n o w it c a n , a n d e v e r y i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n y i n t h e Express w a s plastered a l l over for several days l a n d k n o w s it c a n . B u t there i s a w o r l d of differw i t h d e t a i l s o f t h e latest f i n d . e n c e — n o t to mention p r o f i t — b e t w e e n knowing a b o u t it a n d t e l l i n g y o u a b o u t it. W h y s h o u l d t h e y W h e n this year's Bormann turned out to be a n t e ll y o u ? T h e y ' r e o n t o t o o g o o d a t h i n g w i t h t h e Argentinian peasant the Express muttered not a old e n d o w m e n t policy. N o , they w o n ' t tell y o u w o r d of retribution to its declining readership J O f unless y o u press them very h a r d — a n d neither, course the Express — London edition: " U n l u c k y for that m a t t e r w i l l m o s t i n s u r a n c e b r o k e r s .

Chelsea were r o b b e d , " Northern edition: " L e e d s full value for Stamford Bridge v i c t o r y " — is w e l l FELIX: k n o w n f o r g i v i n g t h e r e a d e r s w h a t it t h i n k s t h e y But you are an insurance broker. Aren't you conwant. demning your own profession?

FELIX: But what about the protection factor in insurance? W h a t advice w o u l d y o u give about that?

CUMMINGS: Yes, I a m . O n e cannot really quarrel w i t h the i n s u r a n c e c o m p a n i e s if t h e y s p e n d m o s t o f t h e i r time putting forward the best possible proposition for themselves. But brokers a r e s u p p o s e d to be u n b i a s e d i n p u t t i n g t h e i n t e r e s t s o f t h e i r c l i e n t s first. B u t I a m a f r a i d that i s n o t o f t en t h e c a s e .

M o s t t a k e t h e e a s y w a y o u t . It's i n t h e i r i n t e r e s t to s e l l y o u t h e t y p e o f p o l i c y t h e i n s u r a n c e c o m panies want to sell, s i n c e the b r o k e r ' s c o m m i s -

Evidently they d i d n ' t want to find M a r t i n B o rm a n n for their readership fell 1 0 , 0 0 0 more than i ts a v e r a g e w e e k l y d e c l i n e d u r i n g t h e B o r m a n n saga.

I'm w a i t i n g f o r t h e " I W A S M U G G E D B Y M A R T I N B O R M A N N " headline. Everyone's got to be s o m e w h e r e , s a i d S p i k e M i l l i g a n .

Martin

Doughty

FELIX

Page 4

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 1973

Editor

Letters Fending for ourselves

Jowitt remains HMJS

In r e p l y t o M r . P a r k e r ' s letter ( J a n . 16) w e in the student houses clean our o w n rooms, deliver mail, cook, w a s h a n d iron clothes. That i s , i f w e want to, w e can; that c h o i c e is u n a v a i l a b l e to those in hall.

Sir, My did

letter

not

expected

it to.

simple. to

I

said

yes.

short

a

think

you

of the

Felix

still

four

you

paper,

likely

in

thus:— cop-

2000

print-

issue Felix

bundles

of

the

printers.

from Also

each

of

of

last

editions Total

of office

250

of

Felix.

most

1000

the

I

you

and

ran

copies

term's

so

that

third

there

other

best were

Christmas

Baileys,

could

letters

of a total

ed)

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remind

of

are

ies (out

four

or

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you you

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important

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it hardly

250

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in

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one

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sighted. that

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them

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you

Yours"

impact

asked

printing

call

Up the

wrote

Felix,

were

on

"Sir,

attain

cost

to

the

Union—£90."

I see from on

the

Letters

weren't in

to

the

out,

the

that

Page,

that

my

not

of

the,

letter

appeared

to

for column.

like you

then

Up

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context.

For

once,

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magnanimity reader's

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tention

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in listening

views

I hope

admire i.e.:

will

pay

readers

its

to a "Jobrot".

equal

at-

who

re-

continuation.

I remain,

HMJS. Paul

W h a t , m a y I a s k , is w r o n g with doing for oneself those t h i n g s w h i c h o n e is c a p a b l e of d o i n g ? I m a y n o t fill m y o w n teeth, nor remove m y own appendix, but I c a n cook, clean, wash and iron!

feel

compelled

in support

of Mr.

ter.

think

Just

as

all

as

Ron

public

we

solution face.

All every

try

to

that

is

have

cleaner,

his

Mr.

could I

only

tra

money

ploy

our

maid

not With

we own

feel

a the

to have all

could

ex-

all

em-

Just

the

unemployed

up,

at a stroke

think,

J a m e s H . Fenner, Meteorology P.G.

in literary

ticipation

in eager

to

Mr.

that

he

few

pay

lege

will

forego

rises

can

afford

more

cleaners.

tions

in advance,

O.B.Es. less

than

his

so that

have

the

to

Bombay

School

of

Literature.

Other

eminent

authors

Jowitt.

F a c t s , M r . J o w i t t . Y o u r letleft o u t ter w a s o r i g i n a l l y s i n c e I t h o u g h t it l i k e l y to jeopardise our position with advertisers, I a m n o w publishing this s e c o n d letter at the request of I C U P u b l i c a t i o n s B o a r d . N o w , to reply to the original letter: 1, n o t o n l y w e r e m o r e copies than required of FELIX Christmas issue delivered, the demand so slack—presumably was d u e to the start of t h e v a c a tion-wards rush—that were more issues to have been distributed, they w o u l d have surely gone to waste. 2, C o p -

worthy

widely

ettes, an-

Mr.

been

is

tern.

Pondering

Parker,

sincerely,

and

ies of F e l i x h a v e to be h e l d back for advertisers, mailing copies, etc. I agree that too m a n y of certain issues have not been distributed. I have rectified the situation. 3 , I have paid great attention to those requesting "Jobrot's" continuation. So many people have a s k e d m e to continue it, e i t h e r v e r b a l l y o r b y letto ter, that I h a v e d e c i d e d do s o — b u t n o w , instead of a further 4 instalments, there w i l l be 7 or 8 shorter ones.

T h e latest appears o n page 2.

age on

porcelain,

over

Priceless

cis-

the puny

and

president

of Public

I became Paul,

quite

Piss

off

please.

Much ever

more

is the

this

article

my

dear

(alais

would

I need is,

was

but

not he

wthdrawal

tell

of of

the in

acute which

from

when

minestrone

the the

collected article

recipe the

who

suffered

up making

lished

you

Only"

he took

out

on Smy-

symptoms

remnants

of

"Men

recovered

of

have

Ponsoby

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ies

loss

Frederick

when

seized

soup

how-

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friend

Mary)

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serious

effect

Anyway

were

1918

must

scrub

the

ceiling.

Yours, R. LI. Lolley G&GVP

Sir,—

Sir,

editorial

with deep conWe view cern your published proposals regarding the discontinuation of Phosphorous the Jobrot and Ferocious Din. We feel that the deep and lasting psychological effects of this decision on the greater part of the student populus cannot be ignored.

We therefore take this opportunity to point out the folly of this action requesting that you reappraise the situation and publish the remaining four episodes.

Your failure to do so can only result in a prolonged suspense, culminating in the total breakdown and eventual decay of society as we know it today.

Yours worried, P. J. Jeans C. J. Lewis S. F. Moult C. W. F. Lamont.

coppubedition

T h e Landsnapper Sneeze

three

t h a n

p i c k i n g

K i b b u t z O r a n g e s .

the

and

"Workers

and

ainst

state"

the

Marxists

work-

classes

for

students

ag-

have

tion

with

their

their

ability

to

capitalists

people

a wage

agree-

employer

on

work)

and

do

ability

rest

of

our

Marxists ates)

that

change

in

the

of

organised

the

owners

the society.

(which

hissubstanti-

motor the

forces,

ob-

our

much

is

most

obtain

argue very

class

society, to

jobs

tory

transient

tomorrow

expect

'plum'

Stu-

a

will

or

neither

workers.

represent of

not means

so are or

whom

are

to the

production,

capitalists section

to society

students) related

wor-

the

i.e.

The

tain

who

commodity

sells,

of

produc-

(employers

the

dents

of

(those

into

ment

ker

relation-

means

enter

two

capitalism

workers

buy

are

a direct

to the

who

society

there

within

which ship

A few calculations reveal this week, 159 sq. ins. or one complete page of PJFD, and in very small print "Advertising Feature" followed by 108 sq. ins. of Life Assurance — surely we have enough forms of Life Assurance stuffed down our throats through letter racks, etc., without Felix jumping on the bandwagon?

There is another 62 sq. ins. of advertising, so altogether well over a page of advertising.

I realise financially advertisements are necessary, but in such profusion?

students

analyse that

by arguing

Sir, — / whole-heartedly agree with the suggestion to remove Phosphorous the Jobrot and Ferocious Din (PJFD) from Felix.

I cannot but feel however that this will only highlight the lack of material that the paper has.

J o i n this most c h a l l e n g i n g w a y of life. \ A s a temporary w o r k i n g visitor; o n an " U l p a n " , the w o r k / s t u d y s c h e m e devised for potential i m m i g r a n t s; as a student or qualified person for a year to c o n t i n u e your studies or get practical experience of y o u r c h o s e n subject.

S . A . E . for details K i b b u t z Representative Office, FE. 1 K i n g Street, L o n d o n S. W . 1 .

T e l : 0 1 - 9 3 0 5 1 5 2 Ext. 3 3 3

the

struggle"

of

social

balance

i.e.

the

of strength

labour of

against

the

means

of

production.

The only

working

other —

class

class

has

within

power).

its

In

last

class

society

sense

class

analysis,

the

(that

so from

real

third

of

and

ad-

itself a

is no

tion

ruling

ever

social

dispossess

to

for,

in

middle

unorganised

sec-

privileged

small

are

no

fundamental

change

there

the (the

capitalists

as

history

vocated

the

the

be,

in

is

class

—

cannot

as

class

progressive

workers

business

confined

in the

men) other

two

classes.

Hence

the

crystallise students the

most

the same

with

should

side

with

progressive struggle

time

Army,

to

at

analysis quo

the

coercion,

force, the

prisons etc.)

pretence

the

of

interests

large,

in

defends and

at (the

of in

society

in

and state

the

under

working

class

combat

of police

places

which,

slogans

ideas

machinery and

above

these

class

of

the

final

the

upholds

status

the

old

order.

In I

the

will

interests refrain

menting

on

of

brevity

from

com-

any

conceptions

in

GEE

other

the

How

obtain

any

haps

the

us"

by

showing we

Tories

exception

to

wage

success behaved hall!

are? might

a

"well-behaved" the

going

substantial

"reasonable"

ALL

"well-educated

like

increase

ME

are

gentlemen

mis-

article.

JOCK P.S.

life o n a

with

"Workers the

of

sincerely

of quoted:

"Solidarity

directly

Landsnapper Sneeze seems to have grown and now takes up i page and finally a 10 sq. ins. block on the culture page announces "Felix Culture" where surely the 16 sq. in. of film review if reduced to single spacing could have gone?

Felix complete

ers"

Space wasting

CATHY

t o

a

(including

Yours

m o r e

week's

slogans

work).

fact with a little reIn arrangement and the removal of the above we are left with 4 sides of Felix (of which 7 articles are double-spaced) plus Felix Diary — the most part of the paper. useful Surely if Felix could be produced with less pages it would be more economical?

I expect that with the return of Sports Page the paper will again grow and all the better, but referring again to this week, wouldn't we rather have quality than quantity of newsprint and have a compact Felix rather than one which appeared to be trying hard to find makeshift articles?

T h e r e ' s

Last showed

misunderstanding

perthe

Princely

Guilds

of the

lavatory

past

paranoic,

Warren.

died

tender

puerile

pathetic body

who

preoccupying

petty

for

Herbert

a passing

plexities

Lunphrase

struck

neolithic

by

set

and

at the

early

the

a

Luigi

Dabbe,

head

of

as the

Python,

col-

won

turn

now and

when

that

Kim

was

next

that.

Yours

Mysteries"

coined

tragically

to

included

at the

who

three

employ

belonging

whose

Eire,

Westcott

know

Hungstein

and in

all

group

F. read

book

we

Mats-

As

century

Congratula-

Sing-

Abalan

the great

all

Parker's

great

is

ridaxxiovy.

(or

announcement

as

style

he founded

"Malayan

(whoops!).

forward

of the

Richard

swallowed

must

history Its

writer

av-

it

fifth

World"

I

serial that

classic.

Monty I look

the

own

Job-

Din".

consider

a

loved

"Boys

edition.

proposed well the

go down

this

a

that

manservant

perhaps).

forthcoming Being neither British nor T o r y , it i s u n l i k e l y I w i l l e v e r be k n i g h t e d ; h o w e v e r , h i s remark lends itself readily to the following interesting s p e c u l a t i o n : if T o r y s knight for s e r v i c e to the country, does Labour knight for s o m e other reason?

so

that

decided strike.

be

followed and

halese

Brad-

you

the

being

gentle-

distress

Ferocious

reminiscent

personal

disappointed

Union rent

is coun-

and

thoughtless? little

idly

own

gentleman. how

have

in the

valet

man's bury,

the the

required

student

of

of that

and

in

great

"Phosphorous

rot

see us

I heard

serial

we

spirited

would

staring

for

if

with

termination

those

Perhaps

of

was

that

let-

all

Sir,

It

write

Parker's of

unemployed. were

to

to

readership,

'Sir,

I do not k n o w M r . Parker.

A s s u m i n g he has no beard, does he shave? Poor unemp l o y e d b a r b e r s ! If h e d r i v e s his o w n c a r to w o r k , what about poor chauffeurs, taxi, bus, train or tube drivers h e ' s putting out of w o r k ? P r e s u m ably his wife cooks, cleans, e t c . , f o r herself, does she have/need a maid? He says one m i l l i o n are out of w o r k — that w a s J a n u a r y 1 9 7 2 , M r .

Parker, not January 1 9 7 3 !

I

you

tight

would

if

rest

spacing

Letter

therefore

point

line

exactly

space I

the

Dear

Sir,

Sir,

"Students are not Workers"

PJFD lovers

section

of

how Permake of

students

to

Note

the

freeze! fellows"

to grant

those

"wellin

White-

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 1973

FELIX

Heath

cuts

standards " A t b y o u r p o l i t i c a l correspondent V l a d i m i r Catrise M a s s i v e c u t backs in l i v i n g standards were a n nounced b y M r . H e a t h i n what he called a " f a i r d e a l " . C o m m e n t i n g on the reasons behind these measures he continued, " O w i n g to the present W o r l d crisis i n capitalism we, as the executive of the r u l i n g class, are forced to lower the standard of livi n g o f the w o r k i n g class in order t o lower the value o f l a b o u r a n d thus m a i n tain o u r profits—whoops, what a give a w a y ! " N o one c a n expect a rise of more than £5 per week over the next three years i n the t o t a l l y new wage negotiation structures proposed in the G o v e r n m e n t W h i t e Paper issued last Wednesday.

Barmy However inessential commodities such as food w i l l have no restrictions o n price rises, likewise anything f rom abroad, anything subject to seaso n a l o r externally caused price fluctuations o r whose price is fixed b y international agreement, o r any manufactured goods whose price rises are due to " u n a v o i d a b l e " cost i n creases. T h i s leaves . . . well if y o u c a n t h i n k of any goods o r services not included i n the above list, send your answers o n a postcard please to E .

H e a t h , c/o St. G u m b y home f o r those w i t h incurable speech defects, 10 D o w n i n g Street, etc.

a

Daft " I ' m not as daft as y o u think, ejaculated M r . A n thony B a r b e r , C h a n c e l l o r of the E x c h e q u e r , his fingers tightening o n a c o p y of the " N e w H u m a n i s t " , although 1 a d m i t it has taken over 2\ years since we took office to t h i n k up a suitable name f o r the p l a n that w o u l d succeed Phase 1."

Silly I n a typical altruistic move, w h i c h we have c o m e to think o f as the h a l l - m a r k of the H e a t h a d m i n i s t r a t i o n , the present rent allowance f o r lower p a i d workers w i l l be i n creased slightly so that i n three years time they " w o u l d n o r m a l l y pay no more t h a n n o w " . " B u t these are not n o r m a l times," stressed M r . B a r ber. " T h e y are times of great stress. A s we have made a l l strikes and threatening t o strike illega l , a n d we're w o r k i n g o n a t h i n k i n g about beginning to start to maybe conceive of threatening to strike b i l l to be incorporated i n to o u r conspiracy l a w s " .

Sillier Lists of sycophantic a d jectives have been rushed to a l l the m a i n newspaper offices i n t i m e f o r a c r i t i c a l analysis of the government's every move over the next few months.

Promises have been given by the leaders of a l l major

Departmental meeting o n the issues affecting the U n i o n c a n be effective i n strengthening o u r democracy.

T h e first one, o n the grants c a m paign, C hemi stry, proposed that I C organise a mass write-in to the Dept. of E d u c a t i o n a n d Science and a demonstrat i o n o n Wednesday, F e b r u a r y 7th, so that we c a n deliver them i n large sacks to the stuffed shirted c i v i l servants a n d send i n a deputation. T h e idea is firstly to get mass involvement of students i n something that c a n be done o n a college basis, get some p u b l i c i t y f o r the grants c l a i m a n d b u i l d u p a little more of the pressure that w i l l be needed f o r victory.

If I C gets m o v i n g a n d does something we c a n prove that we aren't just talkers a n d compensate to some extent f o r the way we let the other colleges d o w n over the rent strike.

O u r neighbours Queen E l i z a b e t h C o l lege have decided to go o n rent-strike as well as organising refectory boycotts.

Refectory

living

Boycotts

T h e last U G M mandated me to report back about catering boycotts. T h e most effective w a y appears to be to publicise that there w i l l be one on a certain day but keep the p a r t i c u l a r ref. a secret until just before opening. T h e n set u p pickets to persuade people to go elsewhere.

I n this w a y the m a x i m u m impact is made w i t h m i n i m u m hardship to ourselves.

stroke" trades unions to p u t u p a short-lived i n d i g n a t i o n at this latest attack o n the l i v i n g standards o f the W o r k i n g class. " S t r i c t l y off the record, o l d b o y , " c o n tinued M r . B a r b e r , "1 s i m p l y have no idea h o w m u c h longer their grass roots membership will a l l o w itself to be fobbed off w i t h this k i n d of hogwash."

Silliest I n a statement o n D i v i dends, M r . H e a t h said " T h i s is the c r u x o f o u r moves, d i v i d e n d increases w i l l have a c e i l i n g twice that o f wage increases.

A n y profit over a n d above the ceiling, we shall p l o u g h back into the firm and so increase o u r share values."

T a l k i n g about student grant increases, he continued, " N o t a chance, they are no different f r o m workers. I said this is a fair deal a n d we're going to be f a i r ; w e ' l l screw everybody."

When questioned on inflation, he replied, " O f course these moves w i l l cause inflation, hence they w i l l lower the standard of living of the w o r k i n g class, a n d so lower the value of l a b o u r a n d thus we c a n m a i n t a i n o u r f a l l ing profits, w h i c h is the sole point of o u r moves.

N o , the o n l y w a y the w o r k i n g class c a n stop us now is to k i c k us out and return a government pledged to socialist p o l i cies, but they're much too stupid to d o t h a t ! "

A Vindication of Militancy T h e statement by Prof. G o w e r , V i c e C h a n c e l l o r of Southampton University that the government is heading for a major confrontation w i t h students if it does not concede o u r c l a i m q u i c k l y and recognising the justice of o u r c l a i m is a result of the acute pressure being put on the V i c e - C h a n c e l l o r b y the rentstrikes a n d catering boycotts.

T h i s sort o f statement c a n d o us i m mense good i n trying to w i n over p u b l i c opi ni on. I n fact, the support the rent strikes have w o n i n this way refutes the argument that rentcompletely strikes upset " p u b l i c o p i n i o n " , overall the opposite has been the case.

In this situation it is sad that L o r d Penney w i l l not c o m m i t himself publicly to o u r case. I n f o r m a l chats along the corridors of power w i l l not change this governments policy. M a s s i v e actions by students a l l over the country plus support f r o m as m a n y sections o f the public as possible, c a n !

Drivel!

F i n a l l y , one misconception spread by the F e l i x editorial last week should be cleared up. N U S have every intention o f negotiating o n higher grants — the delay is f r o m the D E S side. T h e part to be played by the V C ' s is s i m p l y a pressurising one. W e w o u l d i n n o sense allow them to negotiate for us.

M r . D o w s o n knows this perfectly well as M r . D o w s o n attends every N U S c o n ference going.

T h e rest of the drivel i n his editorial isn't w o r t h commenting o n !

Page 5

Stirling President Suspended L i n d a Q u i n n (pictured left),

President

of S t i r l i n g University, was suspended b y the university last week.

A

meeting of the university d i s c i p l i n -

ary committee

voted b y a majority

of

three to two to suspend M i s s Q u i n n for four months f o r her alleged part i n the demonstrations

d u r i n g the Queen's

visit

last October.

She inlends to appeal against the sentence a n d c l a i m s

there

was a l a c k o f

evidence. She told reporters that she was being punished for organising the d e m o n strations, not f o r t a k i n g part i n them.

C A N SEE THE ORIGINAL UN-CUT VERSION O F THE M O S T TALKED-ABOUT WRITTEN-ABOUT CONTROVERSIAL ACCLAIMED SENSATIONAL F I L M O F THE D E C A D E

•IaMJOT KWMtKKS

From Warner Bros ® A Warner Communications Company R e l e a s e d by C o l u m b i a - W a r n e r Distributors L t d .

F r o m S u n d a y J a n 21. at m o s t A B C a n d other l e a d i n g c i n e m a s . S o u t h L o n d o n f r o m J a n 28.

C o n t i n u e s at f i f a u t e f e west end

Leicester Sq.

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 1973

FELIX

Page 6

Felix

Diary

1800 1900 1930 2000

Folk M a s s ( R C ) . More House. " B u l l i t t " a n d " T a k e the M o n e y a n d R u n "M a i n H a l l , Chelsea C o l lege, 1 0 p .

Catholic Society: "Population Explosion - - A Christian Concern", Arthur McCormack, More House.

Q E C Bar Disco. 10p.

T u e s d a y T U E S D A Y , 23rd J A N U A R Y 0 9 3 0 - 1 7 3 0 U N T I L 1 0 t h F E B R U A R Y . E x h i b i t i o n of paintings, collages a n d watercolours by J o y c e C l i s s o l d , Elizabeth Stewart-Jones a n d M u r i e l Rose.

Mathematical a n d Physical Society presents M r . D . Neyland (Princi1300 pal S c i e n t i f i c Officer, Metropolitan Police Forensic Laboratory), s p e a k i n g o n " T h e Role of F o r e n s i c S c i e n c e in M o t o r C a r A c c i d e n t s . " Morecambe S T O I C T V presents " T h e Magnificent T w o " , starring and Wise, J C R and Southside.

1315 K C A F : Piano Recital, S t r a v i n s k y ' s " R i t e s of S p r i n g " , Great H a l l , King's College, 10p.

1330 Dr. D. D . Raphael " E q u a l i t y a n d F r e e d o m " — 2 : T h e elephant a n d society. M E 2 2 0 . " T h e Landscape a n d the E n v i r o n m e n t " , J . Bodfen Gruffyd (Past P r e s i d e n t , Institute of L a n d s c a p e A r c h i t e c t s ) . P h y s . L T 1. " L i s t e n i n g t o c o n t e m p o r a r y m u s i c " — 2 : T h e b e g i n n i n g of 2 0 t h century m u s i c , by M i s s Sarah T h o m a s . M E 3 4 2 .

1740 R a i l w a y So c i e t y: " T h e R a i l w a y s of T h a i l a n d " , by D r . D . J . E w i n s .

ME 664.

1800 T r a n s c e n d e n t a l M e d i t a t i o n : Introductory talk. E E 6 0 6 .

1830 " T h r o u g h t h e g a t e w a y of A s i a " . P h o t . S o c . A g f a - G e v a e r t l e c t u r e .

R S M 2.28.

1900 " S o c i a l i s m a n d Z i o n i s m " , by S o l l y Kaye (former C o m m u n i s t c o u n cillor for T o w e r Hamlets). Biology C o m m o n R o o m .

Exchange concert by students of the Conservatoire de M u s i q u e Geneva. R C M Concert Hall.

1930 K C A F . " T r a d and B r a s s " . Meister Swingers and Fulwell Brass Band.

N e w Lecture Theatre, K i n g ' s , 1 5 p .

2000 S h a r e d prayer ( R C ) . M o r e House, 5 3 C r o m w e l l R o a d .

W e d n e s d a y WEDNESDAY, 1300 1315 1830 1900 1930 2000

24th

JANUARY

External Affairs Committee meeting, Union Upper Lounge.

NCT, K C A F . F i l m , " G o d d a r d Polanski a n d the D IY Cartoon K i t ' King's. l O p .

Islamic Society: Meeting a n d discussion. C B 0 0 2 .

A r t C l u b . R C A A n n e x (rear of H u x l e y B l d g . ) .

IC F o l k C l u b p r e s e n t s S t a n A r n o l d . U n i o n L o w e r R e f e c t o r y .

Holy Ground Folk Club, Royal Oak, 8 8 Bishops Bridge R o a d , W 2 .

Dave O'Docherty a n d Shaun Cannon.

Maria Assumpta. Disco. Common Room. 15p.

K C A F . Renaissance in concert with City Waites, 16th a n d 17th century m u s i c . Great Hall, King's. 3 0 p .

Thursday T H U R S D A Y , 25th J A N U A R Y 1300 1315 1330

1700 1800 1900 1930

UNION MEETING, GREAT HALL. Catholic Society Bible Study Group. Fal 1 1 8 .

K C A F . Play: " N e w Year's Resolution". N L T . 1 0 p . " C h i n a in the M i d d l e A g e s " by D o m i n i c d e G r u n n e . 2: T h e C h i n e s e s e n s e of f o r m i n b r o n z e w o r k a n d p o t t e r y . M E 2 2 0 . " P o e t s i n A n g e r " , by P a t r i c D i c k i n s o n . 3 : P o l i t i c s . P h y s . L T 2 .

Lunch-hour concert: Piano recital by J o h n Henry. Library, 5 3 Prince's Gate.

K C A F . T a l k o n A r t by A n d r e K a l n a r . C o u n c i l R o o m , K i n g ' s . F r e e .

J e w i s h S o c i e t y sherry party.

L o n d o n R e g i o n G r a n t s C a m p a i g n D a y of A c t i o n c o - o r d i n a t i o n m e e t ing, U L U . Free! " T h e P r i m e of M i s s J e a n B r o d i e " a n d " D i a r y o f a C h a m b e r m a i d " at S t . M a r k ' s a n d S t . J o h n ' s C o l l e g e .

Non-members 20p.

Art C l ub: R C A Annex (behind Huxley).

F r i d a y FRIDAY, 26th J A N U A R Y 1245 1300 1315 1800

1915 2000

2100

Islamic Society Congregational prayers — J u n a . C B 0 0 2 .

S T O I C T V presents "Ever-popular M o n o c h r o m e S h o w " , J C R a n d Southside.

K C A F . C h a m b e r R e c i t a l , N L T , free.

S T O I C T V . R e p e a t of 1 3 0 0 t r a n s m i s s i o n . " S t u d e n t s in S t r u g g l e ' ' . C o m m u n i s t Party of Britain ( M - L ) p u b l i c m e e t i n g at 1 5 5 F o r t r e s s R o a d , N W 5 .

F i l m S o c . " W R : M y s t e r i e s of t h e O r g a n i s m " a n d " T h e L i o n i n Winter".

IC C h o i r c o n c e r t i n t h e G r e a t H a l l . M o z a r t ' s " R e q u i e m M a s s " a n d Honegger's " U n e Cantate de N o e l " .

Students 4 0 p : tickets from the S e c r e t a r y , IC C h o i r , U n i o n — or o n d o o r .

P e o p l e ' s D i s c o in U n i o n Lower Refectory. l O p .

Chelsea College Disco, College House Refectory, 10p. " F l e s h " a n d D i s c o . D a n c e at S t . M . a n d S t . J . C o l l e g e K C A F Arts F i l m s : " E l e c t r a " a n d " T h e N u n a n d the D e v i l " . N L T , 15p.

University C o l l e ge H o s p i t a l Dance. ( 48 Huntly Street, W C 1 ) . 3 0 p .

S a t u r d a y S A T U R D A Y , 27th J A N U A R Y 2000

Brett M a r v i n a n d T h e T h u n d e r b o l t s . G r e a t H a l l . 5 0 p .

Ho!-Party, Holbein House, 6 2 Evelyn Gardens. M e n 2 0 p , w o m e n 'IOp. C h e a p B a r . D i s c o a n d l i g h t s , e t c .

S u n d a y SUNDAY, 1000 1100

28th

M o n d a y M O N D A Y , 29th J A N U A R Y IC U n i o n C o u n c i l M e e t i n g , U n i o n E v e n i n g R o o m .

1730 1930 Wellsoc. " S p e c i a l Visual Effects", by J a c k Kine ( B B C Visual Department).

2000 C h u c k Berry, Great H a l l . £1.20 in a d v a n c e .

F o l k n i g h t at M a r i a A s s u m p t a . 1 5 p .

KEEP FELIX DIARY U P - T O - D A T E .

INFORMATION MUST BE SENT T O EDITOR B Y S A T U R D A Y F O R FOLLOWING T U E S D A Y ' S ISSUE.

Clje

& C £ >

/4.

JANUARY

Proabafjeet

(3j>^>o*r*

It seems that a large p r o p o r t i o n of R . C . S . enthusiasts a n d guildstwats are unaware of t h e active r i v a l r y that t o o k place, more o r less continuously, throughout last term, between the unions of these t w o constituent colleges. S o i n the Broadsheet o p i n i o n c o l u m n , this time folks, I thought I'd relate the saga of friendly (?) r i v a l r y actively portrayed by the dubious antics of factions f r o m R . C . S . a n d guilds.

W e l l , i t a l l started one afternoon when a herd of guildstwats attired for some outdoor sporting activity or other stormed into t h e R . C . S . U . office, made various m u m b l i n g s a n d groanings (not entirely d i s s i m i l a r to a herd of G u m b i e s reading out the telephone directory — well attempting -to pronounce the first w o r d i n the directory), a n d t h e n w a n dered off again. Shortly after their departure a keen-eyed member of the R . C . S . exec, noted the u n i o n office sign that used t o p r o p u p the corner of the office was mising. A t once a deadening hush fell u p o n t h e assembled m u l t i t u d e when the devastating h o r r o r of it c a m e H A D JUST (BEEN home — I T NICKED!

sign decided t o relieve guilds of a c o l lection of half a dozen flashy y e l l o w plastic shields. F i v e of these then adorned o u r h a l l o w e d shrine f o r s o m e time d u r i n g w h i c h we were p a i d c u r i o u s visits f r o m i n d i v i d u a l guilds personages who were still trying to w o r k o u t h o w they h a d lost the shields.

N o w one quiet l u n c h t i m e o u r h a r d w o r k i n g d u p l i c a t i n g officer was b r i n g i n g vast quantities of paper into the office a l l o n 'is t o d . T h i s paper h a v i n g been ordered f o r us b y a M r . O . D o w s o n w a s a l l the w r o n g c o l o u r , b u t b e that as i t may, some observant guildgumbies saw their opportunity, a n d despite the b r a v e efforts of o u r gallant reproducing to retrieve their chappie, managed shields.

Revenge was called for, a n d a couple of days later t h e R . C . S . Revenge S q u a d M k . I returned the c o m p l i m e n t of a n inter-collegiate u n i o n office visit a n d not being able to f i n d o u r office sign (the c o w a r d l y guildstwats not having d a r e d t o store i t i n their office i n M e c h a n i c a l Engineering), they returned w i t h a large " L o n d o n W a x W o r k s M u s e u m " notice board that h a d been filched d u r i n g the f i l m i n g of " O u t D a m n e d S p o t ! " (see a past Broadsheet for review of events) i n P r i n c e C o n s o r t R o a d . Pretty this notice was not, however it was some f o r m of t r o p h y n o w and so l a y gathering dust i n o u r office for some weeks until a second large squad of guildstwats repossessed it o n the night of the R . C . S . S m o k i n g Concert, there not being m a n y people i n t h e office at the time as just about everyone of course was at the Concert. ( A n d a splendid event it was too).

Y u p ! Y o u guessed i t , R . C . S . R e v e n g e S q u a d M k . II, i n t h e late hours one night got i n t o the guilds office a n d f o u n d it even more smelly t h a n usual. A c t i n g o n a h u n c h they began a search f o r the inebriated b o d y of t a r i q (guilds vicepres.) but soon found the source of the obnoxious stench be t h e p u n y collection of to rotting M o r p h y D a y fruit guilds h a d stored i n o n e corner.

O u r lads b e i n g i n a benevolent m o o d decided to remove this m u c k f r o m guilds office a n d left o n l y a s m a l l a m o u n t behind. N o w it seems guilds d i d n ' t want this either since it was f o u n d the f o l l o w i ng m o r n i n g in a heap i n front of o u r office d o o r .

Threats were also issued that i f their fruit was n o t returned the R . S . C . office w o u l d (in the usual elegant a n d sophisticated style so often associated w i t h "be done over by o u r guilds lads like".

Now since a carnival committee meeting was due t o be held at 1.00 this was a n i n teresting state of affairs.

T h e meeting was held elsewhere at t h e last m i n u t e and those of y o u w h o wondered w h y a c r o w d of gum hie impersonators were staggering about Southside o n M o r p h y D a y , swaying their arms a n d g r o a n i n g "there's nobody there!" n o w k n o w t h e f u l l story.

Once again revenge was called for a n d so the R . C . S . Revenge S q u a d M k . II, i n the f o r m of a solitary masked figure gained access to the guilds office a n d still not being able t o f i n d o u r office

M o r e developments, if a n d when they i n future Broadsheet/Felix happen, col umns folks. See y o u i n a couple o f weeks.

RON APPLEBY (Broadsheet E d i t o r ) .

F E L I X N o . 3 2 5 : T u e s d a y , J a n u a r y 2 3 . 1 9 7 3 . E d i t e d by O l i v e r D o w s o n , w i t h gratefully received contributions of words, pictures a n d time from Ron Appleby, Martin Black, Alasdhair Campbell, R o b Carter, Derek C u m m i n g s , Martin Doughty, J i m Fenner, Dave Gribble, David Hobman, John Horsfall, Graham King, John Lane, Gordon Reece a n d Steven Swailes (in alphabetic order).

Felix is printed by F. Bailey a n d S o n Ltd., Dursley, G L 1 1 4 E L .

Advertising is by University Press Representation, G r a n d Buildings, Trafalgar Square, W C 2 .

Felix lives o n the third floor of t he U n i o n Building, address: Imperial College Union, L o n d o n S W 7 2 B B ,telephone 0 1 - 5 8 9 5 1 1 1 ext 2 2 2 9 ( P O ) , 2 8 8 1 (Internal).

The Editor lives i n W e e k s Hall, R o o m 1 4 . t e l . 0 1 - 5 8 9 9 6 0 8 ( P O ) , 4 2 3 S (internal).

Contributions a n d help for Felix are always welcome.

Published by the Editor Publications Board.

H o l y C o m m u n i o n ( C . of E . ) . A n t e R o o m , C B .

M a s s ( R C ) . More House, 53 Cromwell Road.

Effects

All

rights reserved.

Felix

is a founder

©

for a n d o n behalf

of

the Imperial

College

1973.

member

of the London

Student

Press

Association.

Union

J a n u a r y 2 3 r d , 1973

" S O N G A N D D A N C E M A N — t h e art of B o b D y l a n "

by M i c h a e l G r a y (Hart-Davis

M a c G i b b o n , £2.50)

M i c h a e l G r a y is twenty-five, he is not a f o l k m u s i c fanatic, n o r a h i p p y , and says he is neither A m e r i c a n n o r a professional academic. T h u s he stands a f a i r chance of h a v i n g w r i t t en something interesting. I l i k e B o b D y l a n — o n reco r d , b u t even so this b o o k makes a brave attempt to p u t some real thoughts into those m a g i c a l l y c a n d i d photographs o n L . P . covers. It tries to show where those m a g i c a l words f r o m " T o n i g h t I ' l l be staying here w i t h y o u " c o m e f r o m — " T h r o w m y ticket out the w i n d o w , T h r o w m y suitcase out there too, T h r o w m y troubles out the door, I don't need them any more, ' C a u s e tonight I ' l l be staying here with you."

M r . G r a y tries very successfully to show where this magnificent performer gets his energy, his d y n a m i s m and, above a l l , his poetry f r o m . T t h i n k he manages to h o l d the reader's attention

FELIX

by carefully interposing snatches of song between his statements, by c a l l i n g o n the comments of others a n d by c h a r t i n g D y l a n ' s evolution f r o m his very beginning to the mass m e d i a product he has become. T h e b o o k shows the influence people l i k e H o l l y , Presley, R i t c h i e V a l e n s and most i m p o r t a n t of a l l the atmosphere of N a s h v i l l e h a d o n B o b Dylan.

It is sometimes quite easy to lose the lyrics i n a song sung b y D y l a n , but w h e n they are before y o u o n the page there is no m i s t a k i n g the s i m p l i c i t y and beauty. " A l l the tired heroes" is an excellent e x a m p l e — a no voice D y l a n a n d an ultra-simple l y r i c leaves us w i t h a threeline song: ' A l l the tired horse o n the s u n H o w ' m I s'posed to get any r i d i n g done?

M m — m m — m m — m m . . .'

T h e b o o k is really finished off w i t h f u l l details of a l l D y l a n ' s w o r k a n d a complete catalogue of his a l b u m s — i n c l u d i n g bootleg ones.

DAVID HOBMAN

Page 7

T h e best reason for going to see Peter U n k n o w n Soldier

L o n d o n Theatre) is to

" Y e s , I think s o " said w i t h grave sever-

see the theatre in w h i c h it resides, for

ity fits b a d l y w i t h some of the superb

the N e w L o n d o n Theatre is the first new

comedy

End

thirty

perennial Inventor who, w i th the A r c h -

years.

It

impressive

bishop, always comes through the c o n -

theatre

really

for

is a

about

very

created

by,

for

instance,

the

b u i l d i n g , w i t h a fine curved a u d i t o r i u m ,

flict on top. There

a very adaptable stage (thanks to Sean

good,

K e n n y ) , comfortable bars, an escalator,

highlighted, a n d the actors p l a y i n g the

a restaurant, car p a r k , shop space and

U n k n o w n Soldier and his W i f e are seen

c o u n c i l flats a l l included.

are

dreadfully

productions

the

M u c h of the play is funny, and the

the

intended,

and

the

points are

Y o u n g V i c i n their time. Perhaps

the

the C h u r c h changing its position as the

National

first

is so m u c h that is

flaws

of

as

the

the

other characters.

surroundings is slightly d i s a p p o i n t i n g — were

that

to be colourless and p a l l i d beside

Inevitably the first p r o d u c t i o n in such

Theatre,

the

Shaw

and

rather

trotted

facile,

out w e l l

dramatic enough.—

cause lies in the m u t u a l nervousness of

w i n d blows, the p a r a d o x of the c h i v a l r y

the cast a n d the audience. T h e pl ay is a

between

series of episodes in the history of war-

the w a r itself, the changeless nature of

fare, w i t h s i m i l a r characters in

each episode—the Unknown

two

Soldier,

(Peter

appearing

antagonists,

his

wife,

U s t i n ov

the

complete,

leaders against the cruelty

warfare

with

its

of

u n t h i n k i n g soldiery.

These points emerge, but there is none of the h u m o r o u s strength of " O h ! W h a t a

Lovely

War",

nor

the

convicting

initially, w i t h U L U scarf), the soldiers,

savagery

Old

T h e pl ay is just a rather pale image o f

Uncle T o m

C o b l e y and a l l . E a c h

time the U n k n o w n Soldier gets called up, leaving his pregnant wife, and gets k i l l e d i n turn

ALASDHAIR CAMPBELL.

" I saw .you last at Colossus, didn't I ? "

West

Archbishop

can't t hrow the new lodger out just 'cos he comes b a c k unexpectedly), he roams the streets of L o n d o n , a tearful figure of pathos, not understanding why he is ostracised for c o m m i t t i n g crimes w h i c h , as far as his new personality goes, were c o m m i t t e d by another person.

H e ends up i n the house of an author he once c r i p p l e d b y k i c k i n g his stomach i n while d a n c i n g to " S i n g i n g i n the R a i n " . D u r i n g an o r g y of " u l t r a - v i o l e n c e " he is l o c k e d i n a r o o m w i t h the 9th at f u l l v o l u m e a n d feeling nauseous to the point o f suicide he jumps f r o m the 2 n d storey w i n d o w and arrives in hospital to be congratulated and spoonfed by the prime-minister, obsequiously grovelling to the television cameras, o n the success of the cure a n d his return to "normality".

It is i n the seemingly schizophrenic c o m b i n a t i o n of opposites that this f i l m has its m a i n i m p a c t — t h e ultra-violence and Beethoven, the nice y o u n g m a n and the p a t h o l o g i c a l case i n our body, the sickness and sadism of the scene of the c r i p p l i n g of the a u t h o r c o u p l e d w i t h the lighthearted h u m o u r of k i c k i n g h i m i n time to singing " S i n g i n g i n the R a i n " w h i c h made almost a l l the audience laugh.

N o , it is in dealing w i t h people and society that K u b r i c k is a non-starter; i n " 2 0 0 1 " the characters were i n a c o m pletely changed environment and yet their society was identical w i t h the present one, he h a d made no predictions and answered no questions, indeed not even asked any, a b o u t the f o r m of society i n 2001. A l t h o u g h he has attempted to show possible present trends i n C l o c k w o r k Orange, it i s o n a vague and confused basis that he has done so, and a l l the (albeit little) satire i n B u r gess' b o o k has been lost.

O n e is left w i t h a feeling of exploitation, of l a c k of fulfilment after this f i l m , for it is a l l too o b v i o u s l y just another money-winner of the giant f i l m industry w i t h its sex, violence, and hints of seatalogical h u m o u r . B u t what answer can one give to the m a n who, c o m i n g out of the c i n e m a after seeing C l o c k w o r k Orange, w h i l e I was queueing to go i n , said to me " M a n , i f y o u don't appreciate that f i l m , y o u sure don't appreciate A r t " .

like

Ustinov's " T h e

the

CLOCKWORK ORANGE " B r i l l i a n t " , K u b r i c k at his best", " A M a s t e r p i e c e " screamed a l l the critics here a n d i n N e w Y o r k , h u s t l i n g and jostling each other foor superlatives, a l l , that is, except the f i l m c r i t i c of the " V i l l a g e V o i c e " who w i t h great perception and c r i t i c a l analysis drew o u r attention to the only aspect of f i l m m a k i n g i n w h i c h one c a n say K u b r i c k is b r i l l i a n t — K u b r i c k the technician.

I n s u c h a capacity K u b r i c k merits every accolade so far accorded to h i m , witness the m i n d - b l o w i n g sets a n d scenes i n " 2 0 0 1 " w h i c h he also directed. L i k e w i s e " C l o c k w o r k O r a n g e " is a treat to the eye, for K u b r i c k has the a b i l i t y a n d i m a g i n a t i o n , coupled w i t h capacity for p h y s i c a l detail, that m a k e s the i n f r a structure of the futuristic films he has m a d e a perfect e x t r a p o l a t i o n of present d a y trends.

O n the surface " C l o c k w o r k O r a n g e " is the tale (based o n the b o o k by A n t h o n y Burgess) of the leader of a b u n c h of " s u p e r - s k i n h e a d s " , set ten, maybe twenty years i n the future, grotesque i n their white trousers and shirts w i t h b l o o d i e d eyeballs sewn to the cuffs and huge fibreglass jock-straps w o r n outside their jeans, they indulge i n " u l t r a v i o l e n c e " w i t h the passive, the weak and the frightened. S p e a k i n g i n a slang developed m a i n l y f r o m R u s s i a n words they beat u p o n o l d dosser a n d a r i v a l gang " i n d u l g i n g i n a bit of the o l d i n - o u t s " , before the leader p l a y e d by M a l c o l m M c D o w e l l (who was also i n " I F " ) retires h o m e for the evening of listening to his beloved Beethoven.

O n e day, however, M c D o w e l l , l o o k i n g f o r ultra-violence i n a b r e a k - i n of the " c a t - w o m e n ' s " house (an ageing leotard e d cat-lover) hits her over the head w i t h a n enormous plaster penis and k i l l s her accidentally. C a u g h t a n d sentenced to prison, he becomes a n angelic p r i soner as the only way to get out, meanwhile, the government is l o o k i n g for volunteers f o r its new cure for c r i m i n a l s a n d M c D o w e l l agrees to this treatment, w h i c h is based on the a x i o m that too m u c h of a good thing starts to p a l l . H e is forced to w a t c h endless scenes of rape a n d violence w i t h b a c k g r o u n d music of Beethoven's 9th unt i l he is p h y s i c a l l y nauseated b y any thought of his previous hobbies.

H e is t h e n released and rejected f r o m his home, (his parents let his r o o m and

dialogue

his W i f e "

(New

and

h u m o u r and pathos, for

fighting

of

B r e c h t or

Brook's

"US".

what it might have been.

In fact, it's just the sort of pl ay

for the R o m a n s ,

open

a new

the Crusaders, the P u r i t a n s , the F r e n c h

back

Peter

aristocracy, and the Somme.

Bertholt

West Brook,

E n d theatre. loan

B r e c h t — a l l is

to

Come

Littlewood,

forgiven.

T h e p r o b l e m w i t h the p l ay is that it falls fatally between the stools of good

I s l a n d of the M i g h t y

is 3}

I s l a n d of

the

hours l o n g ; Mighty

however,

is weak,

seem-

ingly incoherent, and deadly d u l l .

The what

subject with

the

and D ' A r c y )

of

much

Irish

controversy,

authors

(Alden

objecting to the set, pro-

d u c t i o n , music and a l l — I came

away

w i t h the view that, were I the author, I'd

dissociate

CARTER

is strange. B u t then, I consider the whole pl a y strange.

L i k e L o n g D a y ' s Journey into N i g h t ; this p l a y

BOB

myself

from

the

play,

too!

Set o n a n essentially bare stage, the legend of K i n g A r t h u r is (supposedly) given new dimensions. A r t h u r is an o l d , decrepit cripple left b y R o m e to fend off i n v a d i n g E n g l i s h . H e has a rag-tag p s e u d o - R o m a n legion, but spends more time c o p i n g w i t h w i l d , m a r a u d i n g B r i t ish bands than fighting E n g l i s h . A great deal of the play's time is, i n fact, taken u p b y W i l d c a t W o r s h i p p e r s ; only at the end does this m a k e sense, a n d then only little. M e r l i n , here a poet, spends his time c a v o r t i n g w i t h fellow sages; his end

T h e three acts are of almost e q u a l 70 m i n u t e length. A f t e r the first, I was totally bewildered, sensing no d i r e c t i o n to the action. T h e second seemed u n related to the previous; only i n the last act is it tied, however loosely, together.

T h e a c t i o n, or l a c k thereof, set a new l o w water m a r k , in m y o p i n i o n , f o r the R o y a l Shakespeare C o m p a n y . T h e y tried gallantly, i n a n excellent attempt to b r i n g life i n t o the corpse. T h e y failed appallingly.

A m o n g M s . D ' A r s y ' s many criticisms was the music. I f o u n d the unusual score interesting and refreshing; it alone l i v ened the dead p l a y enough to keep me f r o m w a l k i n g out of the o l d , c o l d , draughty A l d w y c h Theatre a l o n g w i t h a h u n d r e d or so others.

If y o u sympathize w i t h the author's fight, y o u w i l l want to boycott this p l a y ; if y o u want to see a g o o d play, y o u w i l l want to miss this. I n either case, a v o i d it.

J a n u a r y 23rd, 1973

FELIX

Page 8

the m o t o r

spoils

p a g e

s p o r t

O n the 28th J a n u a r y , the C i t y a n d G u i l d s College M o t o r C l u b w i l l be h o l d i n g its first major event; a P r o d u c t i o n C a r T r i a l . T h i s consists o f a series of tests o n A r m y L a n d , some i n v o l v i n g c l i m b i n g as f a r as possible u p a steep dirt h i l l , whilst others involve short t i m e d tests around plastic pylons. T h e accent w i th this type of event is o n f u n , but there w i l l be serious c o m p e t i t i o n especially f r o m members of other clubs.

A n y type of c a r is suitable f o r this sort o f event:— there are classes f o r most types of c a r . Y o u r o r d i n a r y r o a d c a r is a l l y o u need. E n t r y fee is £1 (to c l u b members). Spectators, are of course, very welcome.

T h e event w i l l be held at N o r m a n d y H i l l , A s h , w h i c h is near A l d e r s h o t . F u l l details m a y be obtained f r o m J i m Briggs, c/o C i t y a n d G u i l d s U n i o n Office. Dept.

Mec. Eng.

p r o m i n e n t p a r k e r A r o u n d the end of last term, y o u may remember, there were some people w a n d e r i n g about o n the m o o n : at about the same time a s i m i l a r event took place in R i c h m o n d P a r k w h e n the C r o s s C o u n t r y C l u b descended u p o n it to h o l d their A n n u a l H a n d i c a p .

W i t h b r i l l i a n t h a n d i c a p p i n g b y R o b P a r k e r , eight runners finished w i t h i n a minute led, after m a k i n g up a quarter of a m i l e o n P a d D o n n e l l y in the last two miles, by Dave P a y n e in an A c t u a l T i m e of 31m. 57s.

O u r first three matches this term were also in R i c h m o n d P a r k . I n the first we took o n Sandhurst and Vets, and lost scoring 33 points to Sandhurst's 14 a n d V e t s ' 32. R o b P a r k e r d i d 28m. 35s. a n d K a l i r a y 3 4 m .

26s. T h e n we soundly beat L S E 54 to 90 (counting 8) by f i n i s h i n g the first two, R o b P a r k e r a n d Joe Keating together i n 2 8 m . 56s., a n d by p a c k i n g in 1 0 t h — 14th. L a s t Wednesday, w i th a team robbed of its strength by the injury t o R o b P a r k e r , we easily beat a c o m b i n e d L o n d o n H o s p i t a l - K i n g s team but lost somewhat to the M e t . Police w h o h a d five i n the first six. A l l i s o n was 4 t h i n 3 0 m . 30s. a n d D a v e Payne (31m. 50s.), Steve W e b b (31m. 54s.), N e i l B o a g (32m.

15s.) a n d P a d D o n n e l l y (36m. 40s.) a l l got personal bests. F o r h i s services to h a n d i c a p p i n g , a n d to the F l o u r Industry, R o b P a r k e r was d u b b e d " 2 7 t h " a n d gi ven the h o n o r a r y time of 4 4 m . 55s.

N o t i c e a b l e at these matches were three frozen scorers, J i m B a t hur s t , H u g h C u l v e r h o u s e a n d l a n Isherwood a n d ceretain runners not so far mentioned: Pete J o h n son, R o b M a d d i s o n , A n d r e w Baxter, Stuart L i t t l e w o o d , a n d of course(!) P a u l C l a r k e .

T h i s week's m o t t o : a m a n w i t h o u t a smile s h o u l d n ' t keep a shop. F o l l o w that V i c t o r !

l a c r o s s e ICY

TOOTING

SCENE O F IC T E N GOAL

TRIUMPH

F o r t h e first m a t c h of the N e w Y e a r the intrep i d I . C . team ventured into the uncharted wastes of T o o t i n g C o m m o n to c o m m e n c e battle against the apparently strong H i l l c r o f t Lacrosse team.

T h e insistence b y t h e referee o n t h e denuding of Ian Guilford's knees m a r r e d the start of the game, b u t this was soon forgotten as I . C . , i n their quest f o r the league title, began t o pressurise t h e H i l l c r o f t defence. Straight f r o m the face-off the m i d field powered i n . T h e det e r m i n a t i o n of a l l i n the team was evident, p a r t i a l Early of L i o n e l C l a r k e w h o

at

r u g b y Last Sunday 1C first 15 played Wasps at S u d b u r y .

I n the face of a far more experienced

side w i t h an

estimated 2 stone per man weight

advantage

I C put

up a respectable game but as

expected

Wasps w o n

through to the next r o u n d of the M i d d l e s e x c u p at a final

score

H i l l c r o f t showed that they were not to be easily dismissed b y replying w i t h two goals i n the first half.

T w o goals b y T o n y H a l lett, the first f r o m an a m azing angle, a n d three more f r o m W h i z z K i d , (but the less said about that the better o r he won't be able to get his helmet on next week!) showed that the game was a l l I.C.'s. N o w H i l l c r o f t resorted to b o d i l y attack, layi n g out Pete D r u r y b y a v i c i o u s swipe at his ankles. H o w e v e r , Pete w a s

Row Flares Over Room Charges

I.C. 3.

soon h o p p i n g about, after he h a d been deposited i n a nearby i c y p o n d for some improvised treatment.

T h r o u g h o u t the game the defence h a d been exceptional w i t h some good t a c k l i n g a n d tight m a r k ing. B o b Strange way a n d Sam H e n r y p l a y i n g as w e l l as ever. O n l y nearer the e n d w h e n the defence began to slacken d i d the opposition manage to come b a c k w i t h t w o more goals. T h e f i n a l s c o r e : — I m p e r i a l 10, H i l l c r o f t 4.

A l l this was managed w i t h t w o last minute ' v o l unteers', Pete M c D o n a l d and G r a h a m C l a r k e who, despite h a v i n g not played before, soon settled into game remarkably the well. T h i s shows that anyone wanting to take u p a good, fast game w i t h a successful team should consider lacrosse (what a subtle plug!!).

appears

on

the

b o o k i n g f o r m , a n d there is no mention of a levy f o r "flouting a r e g u l a t i o n " SCC

met urgently

Thursday matter,

on

to discuss the and

passed

strongly - worded

a

motion

opposing " t h e p r i n c i p l e of charging College for

of Wasps 25,

t o o t i n g

occasionally emerged w i t h the b a l l f r o m almost i m possible situations. T h e attack ably drew out H i l l croft's defence leaving a few gaps w h i c h W h i z z K i d Spooner was always grateful to utilize a n d , slipping past his opposite number, blasted i n five goals i n the first quarter.

dition

"seeking

c l a r i f i c a t i on

the

of

role

of

the catering

in

manager

Social Clubs Committee is heading for a major confrontation with college administration over hire charge for rooms used for S C C club's meetings.

societies

rooms" and

College

obtaining

rooms, when no catering is required f r o m h i m " .

Mr.

Mooney

has also

f o r a fee of £25

asked

f r o m the South-East A s i a The

row flared when M r . V i c t o r M o o n e y ,

college

Society

catering manager, asked f o r a £50 fee f o r the use of

Cultural

the Senior C o m m o n R o o m , Southside, for a Chinese N e w Y e a r D i n n e r , due to be held on F e b r u a r y 9th.

for a Malaysian Evening

i n the

SCR/Ante Room,

College

Block.

T h e Chinese Society w a n -

A

that a c o n d i t i o n of the use

ted to b r i n g their o w n food

mitted

of rooms was that no food

—Mr.

c o u l d not

M o n d a y , a n d heated dis-

or d r i n k c o u l d be i m p o r -

i n a n y case supply it, on

cussions are t a k i n g place.

ted

his o w n admission.

In the meantime, S C C has

Mr.

Mooney

into

Jackson, told

a

them,

claimed

Gordon

S C C Chairman, FELIX

N E X T

reporter.

Mooney

However,

according

W E E K

IN

to

Council

next

undertaken to pay the fees

to

M r . J a c k s o n , no such c o n -

report has been sub-

if they are levied.

f|||J|

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