http://felixonline.co.uk/archive/IC_1982/1982_0607_A

The Newspaper of Imperial College Union

Founded in 1949

REGGIE GOES WALKIES!

Reggie, the Kings stolen by RCSU.

College

mascot,

pictured

Reggie, the mascot of Kings College London, was successfully stolen by the Royal College of Science Union in the early hours of yesterday morning.

T h e mascot is a large red concrete l i o n w h i c h is e x t r e m e l y heavy a n d was p r e v i o u s l y stolen b y R C S t J i n 1976. T h e r a i d took place after three days o f careful reconnaisance e a r l i e r i n the week, d u r i n g w h i c h it was established that R e g g i e was resting o n some steps i n one o f the m a i n College buildings.

A g r o u p o f about fifteen people leTt the R C S U Office at 6 : 0 0 a m T h u r s d a y , i n c l u d i n g C i t y a n d G u i l d s U n i o n President M r A n d r e w R u s h t o n , w h o h a d been t o l d to c o m e to the office at that time as part o f the treasure h u n t for S p a n n e r a n d B o l t . T h e y a r r i v e d at K i n g s C o l l e g e a n d m a n a g e d to h a u l the l i o n to a w a i t i n g v a n w i t h o n l y a little resistance f r o m c l e a n i n g staff. A letter was left for the K i n g s C o l l e g e President e x p l a i n i n g the m o v e a n d s tatin g that R e g g i e w o u l d be in 1976 when it was last r e t u r n e d after m o n e y h a d been collected f r o m R C S R a g .

R e g g i e was d i s p l a y e d at the R C S H u s t i n g s U G M w h i c h took place yesterday (see report).

Jezebel rompen heim Jezebel, the motorised mascot of the Royal College of Science Union, returned from Cologne last Wednesday after spending over a week in Germany taking part in Karnival celebrations.

T h e t r i p was o r g a n i s e d b y the R C S M o t o r C l u b a n d J e z spent most o f her t i m e at the C o l o g n e K a r n i v a l , a series o f processions before t h e start o f L e n t .

...*"'..

I

— » - » - "l

JL-M«aafflf5W

M r Duncan Batty, Motor C l u b C h a i r m a n , left w i t h J e z o n T u e s d a y , F e b r u a r y 16 a n d was later j o i n e d o n S a t u r d a y m o r n i n g b y t w e n t y R C S students w h o h a d left o n F r i d a y n i g h t .

Revenge F i v e o f the t o p officers i n C i t \ a n d G u i l d s U n i o n w e r e 'treacle a n d feathered' yesterday o n the orders of their o w n union members. T h e sentence was passed at a t r i a l o f those responsible for the loss o f S p a n n e r a n d B o l t , at yesterday's G u i d l s U G M .

T h e y w e r e also sentenced t o be thrown i n the round pond a l t h o u g h they v o l u n t a r i l y p u b licised t h e i r o w n h u m i l i a t i o n b y t u r n i n g u p at a n o t h e r w i s e uninteresting R C S U Hustings UGM.

A l t h o u g h J e z e b e l d i d not take p a r t i n the m a i n procession o n the M o n d a y , she took p a r t i n three other processions a n d was s h o w n o n G e r m a n television.

TSo607

Sweet

Friday, February

26,1982

Free!

Dear

Letters to the Editor II

.SVr

I was horrified to discover that the I C U nuts themselves, Messrs L e d w o l d a n d M c C a b e , have this week a c c o m p a n i e d the R C S U motorised mascot J e z e b e l o n a five day j o u r n e y to C o l o g n e . Does this mean that t h e i r duties as H o n Sec a n d D e p u t y President are b e i n g totally ignored?

P r o b a b l y , we shall never notice the difference a n d M r N i c k M o r t o n w i l l indeed be able to say " I haven't seen t h e m for a week a n d have m a n a g e d quite well without them."

Tours

N . Parker Dear Mark

Smith

O h dear. In his Soapbox article ( F E L I X 606) o n the Soc Soc's " R a d i c a l " newssheet, N . W i l l s o n has surely d r o p p e d a clanger. H e c r i t i cises the c o m m e n t i n the E d i t o r ' s Intro "Please exscuse (sic) any spelling or g r a m m a t i c a l erros as we can't a l l have a p u b l i c school e d u c a tion " , as " insult(ing) people w h o went to a p u b l i c school, as i f it was their f a u l t ? " (his emphasis). Is it not that t h e c o m m e n t c r i t i c i s e s the p u b l i c s c h o o l system ( a n d rightly so), w i t h its foundation u p o n privilege, rather t h a n people w h o have gone t h r o u g h the system? I rather th ink so.

Perhaps, i n future, N . W i l l s o n might learn to understand the words, rather than taking exception to what he mistakenly believes to be w r i t t e n between the lines.

Tours

good-spiritedly

Donald Craig Chem 2 Page 2

Mark

Nick Willson's Soapbox article.,in last week's F E L I X about Socialist Society was fairly well reasoned and thought p r o v o k i n g . In reference to last term's Soc Soc newsheet, R a d i c a l , he gave the impression that leftists in g e n e r a l , a n d Soc Soc in p a r t i c u l a r , are p a r a n o i d , selfobsessed a n d arrogant. T h i s m a y be true, it's hard for me to be objective. I hope that anyone w ho wants to make their own judgement will o b t a i n a copy of R a d i c a l , either from me or Ian House, L i f e S c i 1 (they don't cost anything).

However, M r Willson made several basic errors. H i s c l a i m that the a r t i c l e s i n R a d i c a l attack m u l t i n a t i o n a l c o m p a n y directors a n d right w i n g politicians personally, not the system they have to work w i t h i n , is completely false.

N o w h e r e i n the article on mu l ti n ati o n al s , for example, is a c o m p a n y director m e n tioned personally. W e are not u n w i l l i n g to a d m i t that our opponents are n o r m a l people.

T h e y are caught u p i n the system as m u c h as anybody else; the manager w ho works t e n h o u r s a d a y a n d at weekends i n his spare time; w h o , because of a l l his material possessions, has more to w o r r y about; who cannot spend m u c h time w i t h his c h i l d r e n ; w h o suffers f r o m stomach ulcers; who dies just a few years after retirement.... he too is a v i c t i m of capitalism.

It is the system we object to, a n d its c o r r u p t i o n a n d dest r u c t i o n of h u m a n dignity.

I find it strange that M r W i l l s o n should object to the comment i n the E d i t o r ' s Intro about p u b l i c schools, and to the person w ho advocated the "secret c a n d i d a t e " a p p r o a c h to U n i o n elections (in fact he's not a m e m b e r of Soc Soc) g r i n n i n g as he put forward t h e i d e a . U s u a l l y i t ' s left wingers w h o are accused of being unable to take a joke!

H e says " a cartoon showing a disgustingly fat white m a n (the West) carelessly scatteri n g c r u m b s to a starving black (the d e v e l o p i n g world) is going to cause i r r i t a t i o n a n d resentment among people w ho might be open to pers u a s i o n " . I f t h e y see t h e

cartoon as a personal attack then they're as paranoid as we are. If they b e l i e v e the cartoon is untrue or unfair, then I accept that we should be a r g u i n g our case at a more basic level.

Socialist Society attempts to influence people's attitudes, generally by advertising what we see to be the truth. If we become arrogant, then I w o u l d welcome criticism to that effect, but we w i l l not betray our ideals merely to get more p o p u l a r support. If that was a l l we wanted then p e r h a p s we s h o u l d stop talking about politics a l together. H o w e v e r , the Soc Soc m a i l i n g list had sixty-five names on it at the beginning of this year; now it stands at ninety-eight.

Tours

sincerely

R o b e r t Kelsey Civ Eng 2 Soc Soc C h a i r p e r s o n Dear

Mark

W i t h r e f e r e n c e to I a n Hodgson's letter ( F E L I X 606) I s h o u l d l i k e to m a k e t h e following points: T h e S C C "booze u p " was financed w i t h £20 of S C C funds specifically earmarked f o r e n t e r t a i n m e n t , a n d by contributions from Stephen G o u l d e r a n d M r s Pingree, the College A r c h i v i s t . T h e effective c a p i t a cost of those a t t e n d i n g was about £1. T h e evening was h i g h l y successful, enabling S C C members, usually l o u n d heckling each other, to relax a n d mingle.

T h i s c a n only be good for S C C and I C U n i o n " Con tr as t that w i t h Welfare D a y . N o t m o r e t h a n 30 people attended any single event d u r i n g the afternoon.

T h e p r o g r a m m e was arranged w i t h a lot of time, effort a n d money. T h e per capita cost for those w ho d i d turn u p was a r o u n d £4 or £5. T h e benefit?

G o o d for a very small n u m b e r of people.

If you readers agree w i t h M r H o d g s o n then we must e x p e c t a n o u t c r y at t h e "waste of m o n e y " on Welfare D a y rather t h a n expressions of disquiet at the very low attendance. W h a t are our priorities?

FELIX, February 26,

Tours

disappointedly

J o n Barnett Physics 1 1982

Dear

Mark

I feel duty b o u n d to reply to the letter i n the last issue of F E L I X w r i t t e n by M a r t i n T a y l o r . I'm sorry that I cannot answer his question myself, since being b o u n d up i n the o r g a n i s a t i o n I was unable to attend m u c h of the discussion. I c a n only suggest that he asks someone who was there (though I s h o u l d n ' t spend too m u c h time looking) or phones G a y S w i t c h b o a r d o n 8 3 7 - 7 3 2 4 — t h e y ' l l be happy to discuss it.

Tours

sincerely

Nick Pyne P S : Bollocks to everyone who c o u l d n ' t be bothered to come along!

Dear

Mark

I a m most surprised at the recent controversy over the use of the I C R a d i o L o g o on posters, advertising the L i n k s C a r n i v a l , on two counts.

Firstly, M r N u n n s states in his letter ( F E L I X 606) that permission was not obtained from the station to use the l o g o . I f i n d t h i s h a r d to understand, as I know M r N e i l Sykes, I C R a d i o M a n a ger, to be a most charitable and friendly person, a n d I feel sure that if approached i n the Southside B a r , where he is to be found most evenings, a n d offered a pint of cider, he w o u l d have given the required permission.

Secondly, I cannot see any reason why the L i n k s C a r n i v a l s h o u l d be p u b l i c i s e d w i t h posters s h o w i n g a h a r d l y visible crocodile i n the top r i g h t - h a n d corner. I have it on good authority that the reason for the crocodile on I C R a d i o ' s logo is that Crocodile Rock by E l t o n J o h n was the first r e c o r d p l a y e d o n t h e m e d i u m wave service of the station. It w i l l surely be some years yet before the music of E l t o n J o h n is considered so u n f a m i l i a r a n d unacceptable to the average I C student to merit its live exposure at an e v e n t s u c h as t h e L i n k s Carnival.

"Puzzled" Falmouth/Keogh Hall E l e c t i o n M a n i f e s t o e s (not to exceed 300 words) must be submitted to the E d i t o r by 1:00pm, M o n d a y , M a r c h 1, a c c o m p a n i e d by a b / w photo.

Fast Food Service

Bloody Good Lecture NOBEL L A U R E A T E D r Max P e r u t z F R S spoke at C o l l e g e last M o n d a y at the i n v i t a t i o n o f the C h e m i c a l Society.

D r P e r u t z w o n the N o b e l P r i z e in 1962 for work on h a e m o g l o b i n a n d w i t h the a i d o f stereo slides a n d glasses he gave a n excellent lecture to the c a p a c i t y audience.

H e t o l d o f the setbacks he encountered i n formulating a hypothesis for the f u n c t i o n i n g o f h a e m o g l o b i n a n d how he refuted the ' d e m o l i t i o n o f his theory b y the B e l l L a b o r a t o r i e s of N e w Jersey i n 1980.

D u r i n g his research D r P e r u t z had consulted with such l u m i n a r i e s as S i r L a w r e n c e Bragg a n d Linus Pauling a n d hopes to further elucidate the workings o f h a e m o g l o b i n i n the M R C labs o f C a m b r i d g e , w i t h the assistance o f new a n d p o w e r ful X - r a y diffraction a p p a r a t u s i n Paris.

T H E T R A D I T I O N A L Pancake R a c e a r o u n d Beit Q u a d was h e l d last T u e s d a y . U p u n t i l 1980 the race was a n a n n u a l contest between Imperial College Women's Association (ICWA) and Imperial College U n i o n .

H o w e v e r the event d i d not take place last year a n d since then I C W A has d i s b a n d e d , the C C U s a n d R a g c o m p e t e d this year.

T h e race was r e v i v e d as part ol C i t y a n d G u i l d s tasks to regain their v i o l a t e d mascots S p a n n e r a n d Bolt. T w o races were h e l d .

In the first C & G beat R C S a n d in the second they beat R a g a n d

the c u r r e n t holders of S p a n n e r and Bolt, I C U .

C i t y a n d G u i l d s also h a d to sell pancakes a n d raised more t h a n ÂŁ 1 0 for R a g , selling over 100 pancakes. T h e y hope to m a k e this a n a n n u a l event, a l t h o u g h they d o n ' t p l a n to w e a r R C S slopshirts i n the future.

A s usual the event c o i n c i d e d w i t h the a n n u a l testing ol the fire hoses i n the U n i o n B u i l d i n g a n d a c c o r d i n g to the F E L I X E d i t o r M r M a r k S m i t h , w h o ref'ereed the event, the Q u a d resembled " B a n g l a d e s h after the ravages o f the m o n s o o n ' .

Former Nazi Tells All! A N E X - N A Z I Youth Leader presented a n i n f o r m e d lecture to Methsoc on " N a z i s m , C o m m u n ism a n dC h r i s t i a n i t y " last Wednesday lunchtime.

Pastor A . E . P o k o r n y described N a z i s m as " a r e l i g i o n established in the lace o f a n a r c h a i c a n d inward-looking church". H e gave a v i v i d account o f his o w n i n d o c t r i n a t i o n as a n officer of the H i t l e r Y o u t h , a n d his subsequent if rather r e l u c t a n t , conversion to C h r i s t i a n i t y before the W a r .

S e v e r a l o f h i s f r i e n d s rose t o p r o m i n e n t ranks i n the S S ; at least o n e was c h a r g e d after the N u r e m b e r g trials.

Paster P o k o r n y is new G e n e r a l Secretary o f the C h r i s t i a n B i b l e mission, a n d as a lecturer a n d p r e a c h e r h e is b o o k e d u n t i l September.

Check it Out ZXCHESS 2 Features include ;

Rugby Club Success!

I M P E R I A L C O L L E G E Rugby F o o t b a l l C l u b c a m e t h r o u g h to the final of the G u t t e r i d g e C u p after b e a t i n g L o n d o n H o s p i t a l s 9-7 i n the s e m i - f i n a l . T h e final is at M o t s p u r P a r k o n S u n d a y , February 28. A l l supporters travel free. C o a c h e s leave 1:30pm from Beit A r c h .

Goldsmith at IC MR WALTER GOLDSMITH, D i r e c t o r - G e n e r a l o l the Institute of D i r e c t o r s [i\ body s i m i l a r to the G B I , only n u n c exclusive), w i l l address the I n d u s t r i a l Society next week.

T h e m e e t i n g was o r i g i n a l l y a r r a n g e d as a debate between M r G o l d s m i t h a n d M r A l a n Fisher, General Secretary of X U P E .

U n f o r t u n a t e l y , M r Fisher is now unable m attend, so M r G o l d s m i t h w i l l h a v e free r e i n t o discuss his views on subjects such .is i n d u s t r i a l d e m o c r a c y .

The meeting is next T u e s d a y , M a r c h I at 1:00pm i l l M e c h E n g 220.

FELIX, February

Written totally in machine code.

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Board can be set up in any position,you can even exchange sides midgame.

The ZX81 suggests moves if required. Price ÂŁ12.99 Make cheques payable to Artie Computing.

Deliver to Box ZX81,FELIX office.

26, 1982

Page 3

A T r i b u t e to the ' C a m b o r n e

Mines lose Bottle Camborne

Men'

For 80 years, since 1902 The fine young men of Mines Have had only one view Through the courses of time They have run themselves out

Report

With one objective, the enemy to rout, On and

the m o r n i n g of last F r i d a y at a b o u t 1 0 : 0 0 a m , 140 M i n e r s (players spectators) set off to the w i l d s of the west c o u n t r y to m a k e

against C a m b o r n e S c h o o l of

"The bottle must be won," Has been their rallying cry Deadly serious — not in fun A n d again this year they will have a try.

war

Mines.

T h i s event b e g a n i n 1902 w h e n the first r u g b y m a t c h was p l a y e d a n d i n d e e d (after the v a r s i t y m a t c h ) this is the oldest i n t e r - c o l l e g i a t e fixture in the On the

They fought each other long and hard They battled trying every trick and card They scored a try and converted The other side momentarily diverted F r o m their course of victory, But not for long do they have the lead Mines came back and did their deed.

country.

Friday,

coaches.

four teams a n d the a c c o m p a n y i n g supporters m o u n t e d The

games to

be

p l a y e d : squash on

Friday

evening,

hockey S a t u r d a y l u n c h t i m e , f o o t b a l l l u n c h t i m e a n d , most i m p o r t a n t of a l l , the In the

'Bottle M a t c h ' squash R S M

on

Saturday

afternoon.

were s q u a r e l y b e a t e n by

a t e a m of lecturers

They took away the ball A n d on and on they ran O h , please, O h please, don't fall The crowd went wild O h they cheered to the very last man

whose U n i o n c a r d s h a d l o n g been filed i n the a r c h i v e s . T h e hockey was lost 2-1 Last,

and

the

f o o t b a l l , after m u c h ado,

but

not

least, the

Bottle M a t c h .

was The

drawn RSM

2-2.

forwards d i d

a

m a g n i f i c e n t job against w h a t was e x p e c t e d to be a far s u p e r i o r ' p a c k ' .

H o w e v e r on the d a y , the C a m b o r n e ' W a r r i o r s ' of the 1-8 p r o v e d to be only a fair m a t c h . T h e

C a m b o r n e 'backs' kicked and

grunted

One broken foot, one twisted ankle

and

(But one mustn't iet that rankle) We'll still beat these boys from C a m b o r n e Even if it means we'll have to fight another dawn

t h o u g h not as t a l e n t e d as those of R S M the f l y - h a l f usefully e x p l o i t e d the p r e d i c a m e n t s i n his p e n a l t y k i c k i n g . T h e

e n d result was a loss to

R S M . S c o r e 15-13. R S M scored t w o tries a n d were beaten by penalties

That bottle belongs in the Union Bar In that L o n d o n away so far W e must win and have it back O r the 120 will have us on the rack

i n a most a n n o y i n g fashion.

I n the e n d the d a y was w o n by a most vociferous b u n c h of supporters to w h o m every p l a y e r is gr atefu l. T h e y showed the westerners w h a t it was

all about.

The R S M has lost this year They'll drown their sorrow in a beer But in the future, come 1983 C a m b o r n e will have to pay the fee A n d we'll have our bottle back —thankee.

Roger Bade Mining

Small Ads • A l l third year physicists End mathe m a t i c i a n s . C o m e a l o n g a n d meet o l d s t u d e n t s a n d learn a b o u t the R o y a l C o l l e g e of S c i e n c e A s s o c i a t i o n . F r e e s h e r r y ! T h u r s M a r c h 4, 6 p m S C R Union Building.

• For sale Honda CD200. Great condition, March 1981. Contact J R a n g e r , A e r o 1.

• A n y o n e i n t e r e s t e d in b u y i n g a k n i t t i n g m a c h i n e , £70 or lower, c o n t a c t the U n i o n O f f i c e o n 2232.

• C a r hi-fi, A F / F M radio, cassette ( C R 0 ) , 5 channel equaliser, pioneer s p e a k e r s , £ 5 0 o n o . C o n t a c t M. S m i t h , Elec E n g 2 letter-racks.

• T r i o K D 1 0 3 3 B r e c o r d d e c k with g r a d o F C E + 1 cartridge £35; also, S a n s u i S C 1 3 3 0 cassette deck, Oolby m e t a l tape, d i g i t a l V U s £50. B o t h v g c with original packing. Contact N. Van Stigt, Elec E n g letter-racks or phone 381-9596 .

2

• T i c k e t s to s e e T h e J a m av ailabl e f r o m C l a i r e S m i t h , C h e m E n g 1.

• C a n o n A T - 1 b o d y £60, c a s e £15; M i t s u k i 3 0 0 m m f5.6, £48, h a r d l y u s e d .

C o n t a c t M i k e R i c h a r d s , G e o l o g y 1.

• A s s o r t e d rubberware catalogues, i n c l u d i n g ' G a s m a s k M o n t h l y ' n o s 1-31 i n c l u s i v e . C o n t a c t L. S a v a g e , E l e c E n g 2.

• D e s p e r a t e l y n e e d e d for 2 short plays t o b e p e r f o r m e d at C N D B e n e f i t D o ( U n i o n C o n c e r t H a l l , A p r i l 30) p e r s o n (s) u n k n o w n to h e l p with m a k e up, wardrobe and/or props. Enthusiasm and c o m m o n sense more important than e x p e r i e n c e . C o n t a c t ' E r i c ' J a r v i s ext 1054 o r c / o D r a m s o c , IC Union.

• F o u n d at M a t h s Party J a n 15 o n e g r e y s w e a t e r . If it's y o u r s s e e N i g e l Cryer, Maths Dep Rep. • W a n t e d : M y scarf! L o n g b l u e - g r e y w o o l l e n scarf m i s s i n g in the U n i o n o n W e l f a r e D a y . O f little value t o y o u , s o I'll c o n s i d e r a r a n s o m . C o n t a c t J o n Barnett, P h y s i c s 1.

Page 4

2

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C o n t a c t D e b o r a H a r r e l l , Life S c i 2.

• B U N A C : D o y o u w a n t to work in N o r t h A m e r i c a this s u m m e r ? T h e n c o m e to the G r e e n C o m m i t t e e R o o m , top floor, U n i o n B u i l d i n g , this Friday at 12:30pm.

• B a d g e s o c m a k e s b a d g e s for a n y o n e , a n y n u m b e r , a n y time, e.g. " E v e r y c o u p l e h a s its m o m e n t " . A p p l y C h r i s T a y l o r c / o M e c h E n g letter-racks.

• H y d e P a r k R e l a y Sat F e b 27. H e l p e r s urgently needed. Free sweatshirt d o n a t e d by N a t W e s t to all volunteers.

Details from C r o s s Country noticeb o a r d o r R i c h a r d S m i t h , int 4306.

• I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e A n g l i n g C l u b trip to Ireland. W r it t en details are available from Dave Kelsall, Rm G10 C h e m Eng, int 2594.

• R I P W e l f a r e W e e k . N o f l o w e r s by request.

• S i n c e r e t h a n k s to M r M e e a n d Mr Arthur. C S K .

• U n e m p l o y e d z o o l o g i s t s e e k i n g work during termtime, anything considered; shorthand, typing, guitar tuning.

C o n t a c t S . Petitititit, R m 68, W e e k s H a l l (always in).

• Ents C h a i r m a n : We want your resignation or your blood! I C K C S o c .

• K e y s Cut—Revolutionary shearing m e t h o d . F o r d T r a n s i t ignition k e y s a speciality. Contact 'Uri' Grover, P h y s i c s 2.

• W i n d o w w a n t e d : M u s t be c o m p l e t e with glass and frame suitable for S o u t h s i d e r o o m s . Matt W i l l i a m s , M e c h E n g 1.

• D o r e e n — A r e w a l l a b i e s to y o u what h a m s t e r s are to other p e o p l e ?

• U r g e n t l y r e q u i r e d : c a n s of p u p p y f o o d , r u b b e r restorer, b a g s of s w e e t i e s , train set e x t r a s — L u k e S . , B E 2 .

• F o o t b a l l Focus: Physics Wanderers 7, T i z a r d 4. T h e lads b o u n c e d b a c k P W rule IC. • L e e P , don't flatter y o u r s e l f it wasn't that great. S e r i o u s l y t h o u g h , y ou' l l be hearing from my lawyers—T.L. • S c u n t h o r p e rule C K (sic).

• I n c o n c e r t t o n i g h t : R m 6642 H o l b e i n : C K (sic) a n d the S c u n t h o r p e B a n d .

OLD CENTRALIANS

J . Gratwick O B E C E n g MI M e c h E C B I M President-elect of O l d Centralians A s s o c i a t i o n E x - M a n a g i n g D i r e c t o r of U r w i c k , O r r & Partners L t d C h a i r m a n of Empire Stores (Bradford) L t d M e m b e r of Senate of L o n d o n University Past C h a i r m a n of Management Consultants As s o c i a ti o n Past member of M o n o p o l i e s C o m m i s s i o n Educated at C i t y & G u i l ds College ( M e c h Eng Dept) 1935-39

This man is an Old Centralian-how about you?

For further information contact: Helen Brookes, Room 303, Sherfield Building, Mike Richardson, City and Guilds Union Office, Mechanical Engineering dept.

FELIX, February 26, 1982

An Iraqi student has brought me the following article which, for reasons of his own personal security, I have allowed to be written anonymously

IRAQ Students staged a picket outside the Iraqi E m b a s s y recently to protest against the fascist .Ba'ath dictatorship in Iraq. A r o u n d one h u n d r e d people participated together with member s of the Iraqi S t u d e n t s Society in U K (membership of w h i c h carries life imprisonment under B a ' a t h laws.) T h e picket is part of a m o n t h of solidarity with the people of Iraq o n the anniversary of the first B a ' a t h c o u p in F e b r u a r y 1963.

T h e c o u p unleashed a bloody reign of terror u n k n o w n in Iraq. In a few w e e k s, over 10,000 were killed. L e a d e r s a n d activists of mass democratic organisations a n d trade unions were hunted d o w n , tortured a n d executed.

M a n y were students, m e m b e r s of the G e n e r a l U n i o n of Students in Iraqi Republic ( G U S I R ) .

Internationally k n o w n leaders of G U S I R s u c h as A b d u l Al-Balati, S a h i b A l - M e r z a a n d A d n a n A l - B a r r a k were tortured to death. S c h o o l s , colleges and sports grounds, became centres of interrogation a n d death. Instrumental in terror was the Ba'athist nazi-style ' N a t i o n a l G u a r d ' . T h e infamous N a t i o n a l U n i o n of Iraqi S t u d e n t s ( N U I S ) , as p a r t of t h e s e c u r i t y services, victimised, tortured and killed many students i n order to destroy G U S I R .

Only growing popular pressure, armed K u r d i s h resistance, international isolation a n d b a n k r u p t c y of the J u n t a e n d e d its bloody rule nine mon ths later.

T o d a y ' s Ba'athist regime c a m e to power in a c o u p in 1968. T h e political apprenticeship of its leaders was served in the ' N a t i o n a l G u a r d ' in 1963. It is a capital offence to leave the B a ' a t h party, belong to another political party, or conceal previous affiliation (Article 200, 1969 Penal C o d e ) .

M a s s executions, poisoning by T h a l l i u m, racist ' A r a b i n i s a t i o n ' policies, deportation of K u r d s and S h i ' a moslems (over 60,000 people deported since 1980) are all policies enacted by the p r e s e n t B a ' a t h i s t r e g i m e u n d e r its President, S a d d a m H u s s e i n . T h e bloody war against Iran initiated as a chauvinist war of aggression has killed over 50,000 a n d injured many more.

S a d d a m ' s regime has no qualms about torturing a n d killing even children. A l i H a m a Salih, twelve years old was recently tortured to death ( A m n e s t y International report M a r c h 5, 1981). M a n y hundreds of people in Iraq have disappeared without trace and although little is k n o w n about their whereabouts, A m n e s t y International reports provide little doubt that extensive a n d widespread torture is being carried out in Iraq. .

T h e B a ' a t h dictatorship distinguishes itself from other fascist regimes through its export of terror; through assassinations, kidnapping attacks, a n d intimidation in w h i c h the Iraqi E m b a s s y a n d the N U I S are instrumental.

T h e latest attack took place on S a t u r da y , F e b r u a r y 6, in B i r m i n g h a m o n a member of the Iraqi Students Society U K following a solidarity meeting, at w h i c h agents from the E m b a s s y , including one from the military attache, were identified and exc lu ded. T w o days later in D e n b y , a high velocity air gun was fired at the w i n d o w of an Iraqi ISS member's flat. T h e s e two incidents m a r k an increase in surveillance a n d h a r a s s m e n t by m e m b e r s of t h e I r a q i S ec u r ity Staff, and the nature of t h e m is highly disturbing. O n e of the fears is that the death lists d r a w n up by the embassy naming ISS members (exposed by the British press in 1979) will now be acted u p o n .

MPs sponsoring C A R D R I (Committee Against Repression and for D e m o c r a t i c Rights in Iraq) have put d o w n an Early D a y M o t i o n in the H o u s e of C o m m o n s calling for an inquiry into the activities of the Iraqi E m b a s s y . T h e m o t i o n was signed by M P s from the L a b o u r , Liberal a n d C o n s e r v a t i v e parties a n d Plaid Cymru.

Facts about NUIS 1. F o r m e d 1961 b y a s m a l l g r o u p of Ba'athists, N U I S was linked closely to student organisation, C O S E C , later e x p o s e d as a C I A front.

2. N U I S statutes and policy have never referred to the academic rights of students.

3. M e m b e r s h i p of any other mass organisation is punishable by life imprisonment.

4. N U I S is instrumental in the barring of all non-Ba'athist students from education.

5. N U I S has been de-recognised by most British student unions.

D e m o c r a c t i c opinion in the U K from all quarters, including students unions, trade unions, M P s and individuals have s p o k e n out against N U I S a n d the E m b a s s y ' s activities. It is clear that great pressure must be put o n the B r i t i s h g o v e r n m e n t to e n d the c r i m i n a l activites of the Iraqi E m b a s s y , particularly since it has recently negotiated a Elbillion contract for an arms deal with Iraq. S u c h trade only serves to maintain repression and prop up a blood-thirsty regime. T h e development of trade should not be used as an e x c u s e for ignoring the violation of h u m a n and democratic rights in Iraq a n d the export of Ba'athist ' ^i thuggery in Britain.

t\ed

Iraqi students v, ^ after kidnap attempt

By Shyama Perera

the Committee Against Repres-1

Iraqi students In Britain who sion and for Democratic Rights oppose the regime there risk in Iraq. being kidnapped and forcibly Mr Morton, C A R D R I ' s returned home by government national chairman, said las agents, an MP said yesterday. night: " The attackers were ur -—»*t»^George Morton, the known to Mr Hafidh but ev ~* ~~iarManchester dence we have trom previo -«-j£aai attacks on Iraqi students " « « j v i t h the embassy. /^c77 been

Slugs or Politicians? by

Jeff

Fowler

N o t many w o u l d contest that the reason why I C U is held in s u c h general contempt is the absence of drive, initiative a n d c o n c e r n for students that the E x e c exhibit. It occurs to me that this c o u l d be linked to the reasons they stand for office—the 'up through the ranks of h a c k s a n d sideways to the throne' syndrome described by A n d r e w Lyall .1 have a depressing image of h a c k s scrabbling for campaign issues rather than e x p o u n d i n g the changes they see as necessitating their candidature.

S o m e groups at I C may recoil from the notion of politicizing the U n i o n , but it must be obvious that only those candidates with a coordinated range of objectives, and a genuine personal c o m m i t m e n t to t h e m , will inject any real life into I C U . I'm not suggesting that we should r u s h off to express solidarity with the F a l k l a n d Islanders, but political issues d e m a n d a political response, a n d on some aspects of g o v e r n m e n t o u r l a c k of e v e n a p o l i c y is damning. T h e present government's attitude to c o n s t r u c t i o n expenditure s h o u l d m a k e C i v E n g r e a c h for t h e b i c y c l e c l i p s , b u t I C U doesn't even bother with the usual t o k e n appeasement o n that one.

It s h o u l d be obvious that even Bill C o r t a z z i ' s mob are c o n c e r n e d with some aspects of society in general, w h i c h affect us directly, but w h i c h apparently d o not appear of marginal interest to the current E x e c . I hope that this year there will be candidates campaigning o n political issues, a n d that y o u will tell the other usual c r o w d of h a c k s and jokers to get lost, before they tell y o u to get lost o n important matters w h i c h affect us all. Politics may not appear to offer as m u c h superficial fun as sex a n d beer, but over the past years, how m u c h f u n h a v e y o u d e r i v e d f r o m w a t c h i n g (or understandably not bothering to watch) the antics of U G M s of the slugs we usually elect?

Leave E n t s a n d eating faeces to the C C U s where they s e e m m u c h more able to manage s u c h affairs.

To Serve Us

All Our Days by

Robyn

Morgan

In F E L I X 605, A n d r e w L y a l l , in his article "1982 Presidential E l e c t i o n " , put forward a view w h i c h is shared by a significant p r o p o r t i o n of IC students; "....The n o r m a l p r o c e d u r e for electing a U n i o n President relies o n candidates w h o have been " b r o u g h t up t h r o u g h the r a n k s " in the U n i o n way of thinking a n d after the votes have been counted, they take a s i n g l e s t e p s i d e w a y s a n d sit d o w n in the Presidential C h a i r " (my emphasis). T h i s idea is most emphatically w r o n g . T h e only qualification for a person to stand for any s a b b a t i c a l p o s t is t h a t s / h e c a n f i n d o n e proposer a n d ten seconders and the only way that they may then b e c o m e a sabbatical officer is to be the most 'popular' (for want of a better word) candidate. It c a n , and no doubt will, be argued that having h a d a U n i o n post of s o m e sort makes a candidate more suitable as a prospective sabbatical but it is the students who vote w h o decide o n this a n d other issues relevant to the elections. Sabbaticals (or, for that matter, any other union officers) are not elected by u n i o n 'activists' nor are they elected by the students who do not v o t e — a n obvious point perhaps but one that should be made w h e n only one third of the potential voters a c t u a l l y e x e r c i s e t h e i r v o t e in s a b b a t i c a l elections.

T o s u m up: use your vote to c h o o s e the sabbaticals that y o u want.

ai

ii

Page 5

CLUBS AND SOCIETIES' PhotoSoc

Ents

Due to the early deadline we can't tell y o u who w o n the B & W competition on Tuesday. But we can tell you that the c o l o u r competition on March 16 has been cancelled, because the Judge can't come, and we couldn't find another one. Also the lecture on March 9 on Photographic Chemistry has been postponed. T h e lecturer, Mr Michael Maunder, has transport difficulties and will probably be able to come some time next term.

H o p e y o u all enjoyed the multitude of recent Entertainments. A s you may have noticed we're already past the mid-point of this term, so if you haven't been to an Ents

event yet time's running out. A few more bands are planned this term, so look out for posters and also our ads in F E L I X .

M e a n w h i l e , d o n ' t forget the weekly films, next T h u r s d a y we're s h o w i n g Being There ( M E 2 2 0 , 6:30pm) starring Peter Sellers. A s usual the cost is only 50p so make it a date.

Finally, one thing which hasn't been cancelled or postponed is next Tuesday's lecture on "the rise and fall of the plate camera"

by Martin Russell. You should have read about this in our last article, but just in case you didn't, the lecture will be illustrated with a large collection of historical plate cameras. Mr Russell will also give expert opinions on old cameras which members of the audience may wish to bring along.

T h i s will be a m u c h better lecture than any we had last year, so come early to be sure of getting in. It's in Mines 3-03 at 7:30pm (not 6:30 as stated in the newsletter) and it's on Tuesday, March 2.

For the benefit of those of you who missed it the first time round in 1812, Imperial College War G a m e s C l u b will be holding a replay of the Battle of Bardodino on W e d n e s d a y .

W i l l t h e R u s s i a n s defeat N a p o l e o n ? Will it be a bloodbath?

Will N a p o l e o n work it out with Josephine? O r will the end of 1812 be Napoleon's Winter of Discontent?

C o n f u s e d ? Y o u won't be after t h i s W e d n e s d a y ' s meeting of Imperial College Wargames Club.

S p e c t a t o r s and additional players welcome.

Snookered

ICU Handbook The deadline for articles for the ICU Handbook is Friday, A p r i l 30. All contributions to be placed in the H a n d b o o k Box on the noticeboard in the FELIX Office.

Wargames

Next week's Ents film is Being T h e r e , a highly amusing comedy in which Peter Sellers gives one of the finest performances of his career as Chancey Gardner, a simple man who rises to a position of power through no fault of his own. The story was written by Jerzy Kosinski, who coincidentally stars in REDS (see reviews) which opens this week.

Not m u c h happened last week.

The A a n d B teams couldn't find any o p p o n e n t s , and the C team h a d a disaster only beating Bedford 3-2. Once again it was left to Holt to win the deciding frame, which he only just managed.

A n d y H u r f o r d brought S t u Calvert's fine run in the handicap to an end when he beat him last week. Calvert has a chance for revenge though, as the two meet in the open very shortly.

Y o u m a y have noticed that we've had the A and B tables reclothed. Please take great care when playing Simpkin-type swerve shots, as one hole per year is quite sufficient, thanks.

Bookshop News List of Titles from

Boredom ive, four, three, two, one, run V T . One thing that's been puzzling me for at least two months now is why does L W T always miss the " F " off the Thunderbirds opening sequence? Since they have stopped screening it and there is no longer any need to get up early on Saturday, I suppose I'll never know.

Babani Publishing Ltd

Beginners' Guide to Microprocessors & Computing - E . F . Scott, £1.75 Elements of Electronics, 1, 2, & 3 - F A . W i l s o n , £2.25 Build Your Own Electronic Experiments Laboratory using ICs B . B . B a b a n i , 85p Radio Stations Guide - Babani & J a y , £1.75 Engineers & Machinists Reference Tables - B.B. Babani, 75p A Microprocessor Primer - E . A . P a r r , £1.75 Mobile Discotheque Handbook - C . C a r s o n , £1.35 Users Handbook - Babani, £1.50 Electronic Calculators Second Book of Transistor Equivalents & Substitutes - Babani, £1.75

Apathy

Quote of the Week

Back to reality now and I thought I would spend a little time telling you about a typical S T O I C week

From Road, c ou ld there

Why Bother Monday: Wander into T V Studio and clean the Chairman's boots.

Tuesday: D o a little bit of editing.

Wednesday: This is the biggie. The day 'Newsbreak' itself is made. All your hard work becomes reality as items are successively placed onto a master tape. Get pissed afterwards.

Thursday: Broadcast day. At 1:00 and 6:00pm Newsbreak is broadcast to the Halls and the J C R .

Friday: Time to decide what you are going to do next week and who's going to produce it.

Le Weekend: Practise your investigative journalism by taking an outside 'broadcast crew to cover an event of your choice. (Generally make a nuisance of yourself.)

Repeat the above many times.

With IC Radio That's all I have time for, for now, but remember you can watch us, watching you, watching us, watching you, every Thursday at 1:00 and 6:00pm.

Page

6

a large b o o k s h o p not a million miles f r o m Charing Cross a member of their staff was a s k e d by a customer where he find O s c a r Wilde a n d he was told that he wasn't working today!

There are a number of laboratory b o o k s n o w in stock at £1.15 for those of y o u in need. I a m sure these will do until our stock c o m e s in from E . S . A .

A selection of tankards both plain a n d with IC crest on are on show in the showcase in the counter. Additional letters cost 20p e a c h ; for special engraving please allow a full week.

New in Paperback Pesticide Application Methods - G . A . M a t t h e w s , Longman £7.95 G r a h a m M a t t h e w s is Reader in Pest Management at Imperial College. T h e reviewers said at the time of publication "the book we have all been waiting for...Those with professional interest in all aspects of pesticide application, whether in field, orchard, forest, rubbish d u m p , warehouse or m u d hut. This book may be seen as the first truly comprehensive a n d critical guide to both theory and practice on the subject."

FELIX, February 26, 1982

CLUBS AND SOCIETIES Industrial Society "Psst! Want to see a shipyard, little boy?" said the man in the flat This mascotry business is certainly hat and old raincoat. He was none After the tragic loss of Mr Spanner on the increase. What fun it is to other than Mark Skeates (DoC2), and Mr Bolt a treasure hunt has run about acting like five year Industrial S o c Visits Manager, now started. The trials of all those olds. I hope that you enjoyed the inviting me to join the trip to involved was held yesterday. If pancakes served by Guilds at our Cammell Laird on Wednesday, you did not think that the punishMarch 3. " W e leave early in the request, and that you will be ments were sufficient then you attending the Results Barnight on morning because it's in Birkencan appeal for the cases to be Tuesday to see them in action head, Merseyside on the Northreheard with stronger punishagain. The reason for the Results western Riviera, and we want to ments.

Barnight is the Elections, strangely arrive in time to see the whole yard and talk to unions and enough, so please remember to Itinerary for next week management. There are still some bring your Unioncards and vote Sun Feb 27 Ice Skating Trip. on Monday.

Tues, March 2 Civ Eng Soc talk by places left, so tell all your friends to write to me if they want to go. the Royal Engineers.

Annual Dinner dates have been Thurs March 4 Trip to Pass the What he did not mention is that finalised at last. It will be at the Butler (Buy tickets from the Union on Thursday, March 4 at 1:00pm, Kensington Close Hotel on Sir Walter Goldsmith is coming to Friday, March 19 at 7:30pm for Office, £3 each.)

M e c h E n g 220 to talk about 8:00pm. The menu features veal, If you wish to stand for any of black forest gateau and other the posts in Guilds you ought to Industrial Democracy. Since he is Director-General of the Institute exotic foods and cost about £10. be thinking about your campaign of Directors, I don't suppose he's Tickets go on sale soon. now. The election papers go up at a keen advocate of the idea! So do See you at the Rugby 7s on 9:30 next Friday. come along with any questions Sunday. you can think of, for a lively debate.

Friday, March 5 for transmission A very important figure to on Sunday, March 7. Those who devotees of C i t y and G u i l d s are likely to be working in either College is Sir Kenneth Corfield, the nuclear or defence industries, C h a i r m a n of the E n g i n e e r i n g as well as anyone who plans to join C o u n c i l , whose decisions and the armed forces, or anyone else policies directly affect you. That's T o all those interested in taking who feels they can contribute, are besides being Chairman of S T C , part in a discussion on 'Students invited to take part in a studio major c o n t r a c t o r to B r i t i s h in the N u c l e a r a n d D e f e n c e discussion at Radio London with Telecom, so dr<. p in on Chem Eng Industries'. about thirty other people. InterTheatre 1 at 6:00pm, Tuesday, The discussion, for the Radio ested parties please contact Nick March 9, to find out about EnginL o n d o n ' S t u d e n t V o i c e ' proBleech, c/o IC Radio (int 3440). eers in Industry. gramme, will be r e c o r d e d o n City

&

Guilds

Radio On

Design for Social Need It can be argued that all design for industry is (or should be) design for social need, but in practice there are many real social needs which are not adequately met by private industry or state agencies. These needs include many aspects of design for the disabled, the elderly and infirm, and design for Third World needs. Able-bodied people in 'affluent' western society (such as the unemployed) also have needs which can sometimes be met by design action.

Design for social need is no longer as fashionable as it once was, but" has now entered a more realistic professional stage. The speechmakers and the trendy audiences have moved on and the starry-eyed idealists have found that it is by no means an easy option. All the designer's technical, professional, analytical and promotional skills are required and staying power is likely to be needed in full measure if designs are to be manufactured in any quantity at a cost society can afford.

At the Royal College of Art there have been a number of products made up whereby disadvantaged people have had their lifestyles substantially enhanced. One example is the spina bifida children's playcar. Another is a set of stretcher/trolleys for epilectic boys which are operated by the patient's own class-mates. A cheap and simple speech training aid suitable for Third World manufacture and use has been favourably reported by The New Scientist. A n innoculation kit with its supporting icemaker unit which could save the lives of millions of Third World rural children won two major international awards.

Another outstanding project was the egg-packing scheme originally for Zambia, but subsequently taken up by fourteen Third World nations.

This resulted in substantially improved nutrition for perhaps millions of people. This project was initiated by the Intermediate Technology Development G r o u p , with product analysis, design and prototype development at the Royal College of Art, and machinery design by Reading University. The machinery was developed and manufactured by a British firm.

SF Soc One of the great comedy films of the past ten years c o m e s to College on Tuesday. The Big Bus (THE BIG BUS) is the story of a technological marvel. The world's first transcontinental nuclear p o w e r e d bus sets out across North America, but the passengers are unaware as they lounge in the swimming pool, relax in the cocktail bar, or have a game of ten-pin bowling that there is a saboteur aboard with a bomb.

When I saw this film at the cinema I laughed myself silly. Turn up at Mech Eng 220 on Tuesday at 6:30pm and witness a film that knocks Airplane in to a cocked hat.

Literary noted: Roderick by J o h n S l a d e k , the b o o k that inspired the informal lecture on robots that he gave at College some while ago is out in paperback, and it's the best thing he's ever done folks.

For the nth week running SF Soc Bulletin contains no laughs.

I'm sorry for this, and can only say that the last film we showed was hilarious, the next one is very funny indeed, and the one coming up in a m o n t h ' s time is also extremely amusing. So if you want to be entertained go and see them or read Roderick. Yours drained of inspiration.

Francesco

Ragoczy

and the Collector

A 'Design for Social Need' week with lectures by practical experts in the various subject areas is held annually at the Royal College of Art, and this year commences on Monday, March 8. Most of these lectures are open to professional practitioners and serious students from other Colleges. There is no charge, but please remember that we are working a very limited budget and very limited time allocations. If you wish to attend plese send a stamped addressed envelope to Len Wingfield, Royal College of Art, Kensington Gore, London SW7.

Those with special needs e.g. wheelchair access, hearing problems, etc., should contact the R C A Student Union (584-5020) who will do their best to help.

Design for Social N e e d 1982 L e c t u r e Module Monday, M a r c h 8, 11:00am, M a i n Lecture Theatre "The realities of designing for social needs" (Introductory) Len Wingfield, R C A Industrial Design Engineering Tutor.

Monday, M a r c h 8, 2:30pm, M a i n Lecture Theatre "Appropriate Technology—experience and developments" Professor Warren Adams of the Intermediate Technology Development Group.

Tuesday, M a r c h 9, 11:00am Visit to Disabled Living Foundation, 346 Kensington High Street, London W14 (RCA ID & IC Eng students only). Others arrange visits direct with the Foundation (tel 602-2491). Cost £2.50 per person.

T u e s d a y , M a r c h 9, 2:30pm, Main Lecture Theatre "Projectwork for Queen Mary's Carshalton Unit" Bill Bond, Chartered Engineer, Director of Unit.

Wednesday, M a r c h 10, 11:00am ID L e c t u r e R o o m "Design and ergonomics for the disabled" Russell Manoy, Consultant Designer and Ergonomist.

Wednesday, M a r c h 10, 2:30pm " C h i l d r e n ' s traction devices" (or similar topic), Russell Manoy ( I C S T / R C A ID Eng Courses Case History).

Friday, M a r c h 12 Department of Cultural History Events, Mike Cooley, etc. ( R C A students only).

The Main Lecture Theatre is in Common Room Block, Jay Mews.

The ID Lecture Room is in Darwin Building. Wheelchair access via back entrance (Jay Mews) goods lift.

FELIX, February

26,

1982

Page 7

Arms and the Man by Bernard Shaw.

Directed by Jonathan Lynn. The Lyric Theatre, Shaftesbury Avenue.

Shaw's comedy takes place in a certain Major Petkoffs house in Bulgaria in the 1880s It is a time of war and the Bulgarians have just won a victory over the Serbians, thanks to the daring of a dashing young officer, Sergius Saranoff, most captivatingly played by Peter Egan. But the real hero turns out in the play to be a Captain Bluntschli, a Swiss mercenary played

by R i c h a r d Briers who carries chocolate creams in his pockets instead of bullets and is more keen on saving his own skin than seeking heroism. The two characers get tied up in an amorous tangle with the Major's daughter, played by Alice Krige who stars in the recent film Ghost Story. The result is a delicious comedy that exposes the illusions of warfare, love and romantic idealism. Arms and the Man, full of Shaw's inimitable mischievousness, deservedly remains one of his popular plays.

The play's earliest days make interesting reading. The opening night in 1894 was a huge s u c c e s s , but to S h a w ' s uneasiness the audience laughed hysterically throughout the play. He took a curtain call, one of the rare times he did, and amid the rapturous applause he was greeted bya solitary loud " B o o " from a malcontent in the gallery. Shaw turned in his direction and said, " M y Dear fellow, I quite agree with you, but what are we two against so many?" Shaw had the bizarre experience of witnessing an apparently absurd success, his wit so diverting his audience's thoughts away from the play's more serious content that it had been misunderstood as a mere farce. (One

Peter

Egan

and

Richard

Briers

in a scene

from

is reminded of Oscar Wilde where there is usually something in each of his plays that might have sent the audience out thinking if he hadn't seemed to prefer to send them out laughing). H o w e v e r , not e v e r y o n e was amused. T o many upright Britishers the play was a 'damning sneer at military courage'. It is reported that the play offended the Prince of Wales, later to become King Edward VII, who was alleged to have muttered during the performance that the author "must be mad".

The present production at The Lyric is supported by a strong and very amusing cast.

However, I have to admit that like the play's first performances, the element of farce in this

The play does not indulge in moral gloom but rather is full of humour and dignity. The dialogue does lack subtlety in one or two M y first trip to Hampstead Theatre, one of places but is nevertheless expressive about the L o n d o n ' s most enterprising theatres, unfairness of life and pokes a guilty finger at produced a few suprises. First of all the theatre those who arrive just in time for the last rites. is not in Hampstead but next to Swiss Cottage A lot of the play's strength comes from its tube station. If you emerge from the depths of Hampstead underground station (as I did) recognisable realism, as such scenes are continuously being enacted all over the there is a very long walk down the hill to Swiss country.

Cottage. In addition, this renowned theatre T h e play ends mid-March and seats and turned out to be no more than a small 'prefab', standbys are modestly priced. bereft of a dignified frontage. But what are mere appearances? A theatre to keep your eye o n , it was the h o m e of the immensely successful Translations, which is now in repertoire at the National's Lyttelton Theatre, The Penguin Book of Political Comics, and was voted Best New Play of 1981 by the compiled by Steef Davidson, ÂŁ5.95.

London Theatre Critics.

T h i s is a disappointing book for several Skirmishes is by Catherine Hayes, a young reasons. First, the cartoons are so badly teacher in Liverpool who started writing only printed that it's often difficult to read them. in 1975. It studies the relationship between a dying mother and her two daughters in a This isn't all Penguin's fault, the original comics probably weren't very well produced, but it is humorous and harrowing way. A n amazing Penguin's fault that a lot of them are printed amount can be pieced together in the mere much too small. Second, roughly half of the eighty minutes' duration of the play. Jean cartoons are foreign (Steef Davidson is Dutch) (played by Frances de la Tour who here takes with footnotes providing a translation, but on her first stage role since her award-winning they're tiresome to read. Third, too much performance in Duet for One) is the sister who s p a c e is t a k e n u p by Steef D a v i d s o n ' s has been left to look after the dying mother generally boring and pretentious commentaries (played by A n n a Wing). She is isolated, He takes the cartoons far too seriously and infertile, morosely funny and just about attaches too m u c h significance to them, manages to survive on a withering marriage. presumably to gratify his self-importance.

Rita (played by Gwen Taylor) is the sister who Some of the statements he makes are silly and got away. She uses her family and her general pompous for example: "....the political comic business to maintain an arms-length comstrip has come into its own as a mature passion.

Skirmishes by Catherine Hayes. Directed

by Tim Fywell. Hampstead Theatre.

Page

8

FELIX,

February

26,

1982

Shaw's

A r m s and the Man

production, and much of it is of a visual nature, is a little too dominating. The director of the play, Jonathan Lynn (co-author of the B B C comedy series Yes Minister and director of Pass the Butler at the Globe Theatre) has perhaps not quite applied all the discretion that is necessary. Unless a play is a farce per se as in the excruciatingly funny Can't Pay? Won't Pay!, it should be subjected to a sparing amount of farce, as a meal is to a herb or s p i c e . T h e L y r i c p r o d u c t i o n is neither outstandingly funny nor particularly thoughtprovoking, but having said that, the play still provides a very entertaining evening!

Nick Bedding

genre the political press follows the general pattern of visually oriented culture, w h i c h in turn reflects the social conditions under which we live." Davidson has unfortunately assumed that people will be as interested in the history and ideology of the cartoons as they will be in the cartoons themselves. So there are pages and pages telling you what the Federation des Etudiants Revolutionnaires was doing in 1968 and so on, all boring. The only interesting piece is an account of the birth of the Comics C o d e A u t h o r i t y , set up in 1959 by the American comics industry to appease the McCarthyites.

The cartoons themselves are a very varied c o l l e c t i o n , going from 1913 (anti-strike b r e a k i n g ) to 1975 (fall of P o r t u g u e s e dictatorship).

According to Davidson...."comic strips are an ideal medium for the spreading of ideas " but it depends what you mean by 'ideas'.

Nearly all the cartoons are crude propaganda, the only idea they try to spread is merely 'we are absolutely right and our enemies are wrong'. (Most of the 'baddies' are shown as looking ugly and sinister, while the 'goodies' always look h a n d s o m e and intelligent.)

Very few of the cartoons are designed to make you think. The title of one cartoon sums up the atmosphere of the book: "Donald Duck: The truth the bourgeois comics have repressed'.

It's a sort of Death-to-Imperialists ideology lightened with some self-parody. O n the whole the book is poor, with too few good cartoons (like o n e b y R o n C o b b ) t o b r e a k t h e monotony.

N. Willson

REDS Certificate AA Starring Warren Beatty, Diane Keaton, Jack Nicholson.

T h e cinema epic has all but died since the days of Doctor Zhiuago and Lawrence of Arabia, but W a r r e n Beatty's REDS (which opened yesterday) m a r k s a return to that era.

T h e story of J o h n R e e d , an A m e r i c a n writer w h o w i t n e s s e d the S o v i e t R e v o l u t i o n a n d r e c o r d e d his experience in his b o o k T e n Days That Shook The World, has obsessed Beatty for many years. H i s screen adaptation of Reed's life and love for radical feminist L o u i s e B r y a n t ( D i a n e K e a t o n ) is set a g a i n s t t h e b a c k d r o p of the u p h e a v a l s in R u s s i a a n d A m e r i c a , w h i c h provides a fascinating subject in a long and stylish film.

R e e d meets B r y a n t i n P o r t l a n d O r e g a n in 1915 w h e n he is a j o u r n a l i s t w o r k i n g o n matters of social injustice. H e s o o n b e c o m e s involved in both politics a n d with B r y a n t , who he t a k e s t o N e w Y o r k t o j o i n h i s intellectual friends in G r e e n w i c h Village. T h e y s o o n marry despite Louise's involvement with playwright Eugene O ' N e i l l (Jack N i c h o l s o n ) .

J o h n Reed's political activities eventually throw them apart but they are reunited w h e n he takes his wife to Russia a n d they witness the Soviet Revolution at first h a n d .

Beatty has c h o s e n a n unusual a p p r o a c h to his t o p i c ; the s t o r y is i n t r o d u c e d a n d interrupted by interviews with "the witnesses", friends and acquaintances of R e e d a n d B r y a n t who recount gossip a n d stories from that era.

These old faces remain irritatingly unintrddu c e d, and include R e b e c c a W e s t , author H e n r y Miller, L a d y D o r a Russell a n d many more beside. T h e y add a personal reality to the story and tend to serve as links between a s e r i e s of f r a c t u r e d e v e n t s . W h i l s t t h i s technique w o r k s quite well, I can't help feeling that the faces really s h o u l d have b e e n identified.

B e a t t y is c o n v i n c i n g as R e e d a n d h i s obsessive love for L o u i s e B r y a n t was m a t c h e d by a r o m a n c e off screen with D i a n e K e a t o n during filming. T h e screenplay centres o n the

relationship between R e e d and Bryant and thus both lead characters. I found Diane K e a t o n a great disappointment, frozen into her single screen persona and almost incapable of expressing a convincing range of emotion.

A p a r t from this the casting is very strong; J a c k N i c h o l s o n turns in another great tight-lipped p e r f o r m a n c e as E u g e n e O ' N e i l l , M a u r e e n S t a p l e t o n s h i n e s as t h e c y n i c a l E m m a G o l d m a n and author J e r z y K o s i n k i (who wrote B e i n g There) is suitably grim as the fanatical Bolshevik leader Zinoviev. These characters play out their roles amidst the confusion and excitement of the time. J o h n

TAPS

Cert A. Starring George C. Scott and Timothy Hutton. Directed by Harold Becker.

R e e d eventually founds the A m e r i c a n C o m m u n i s t L a b o u r Party a n d goes to M o s c o w for recognition, where he is prevented from returning to A m e r i c a . Separated from his wife, he a t t e m p t s t o e s c a p e a n d is e v e n t u a l l y reunited before his premature death at the age of 32.

R e e d was indeed an interesting man and W a r r e n Beatty has used his life to produce an entertaining and informative film.

This page: (top right) George C. Scott as General Harlan Bache in Taps (centre) Warren Beatty is reunited with Diane Keaton in Reds and (above) Timothy Hutton inspects some of the cadets who seize a military academy in Taps.

FELIX, February 26, 1982

W h e n a military academy steeped in 140 years of tradition is informed by the powers that be that it must close so that the land c a n be developed for real estate, it is time to fight back. W h e n the G e n e r a l c o m m a n d i n g the school is r e m o v e d from the scene by heart failure, leaving the senior cadet in charge of the academy, the resulting situation is, if you'll p a r d o n the expression, explosive.

T i m o t h y H u t t o n plays B r i a n M o r e l a n d , the cadet left in charge w h e n G e n e r a l H a r o l a n B a c h e ( G e o r g e C . S c o t t ) is r u s h e d i n t o intensive care. M o r e l a n d , anticipating the immediate closure of the academy, organises the seizure of the a r m o u r y . T h u s a r m e d , the cadets seal the perimeter a n d prevent access to the g r o u n d s u s i n g a r m e d force. T h e a u t h o r i t i e s are u n w i l l i n g to listen to their d e m a n d s for reconsideration of the closure, a n d a siege results.

T h e success of the film rests largely in the way that tension is built up and sustained during the course of the seige. T h e point of view is constantly and cleverly flipped so that our sympathies alternately lie with M o r e l a n d , for s t i c k i n g to his principles and his ideal of " h o n o u r above a l l " , or with C o l o n e l K i r b y , the N a t i o n a l G u a r d colonel sent in to defuse the situation, who is terrified that he might have to o r d e r h i s m e n t o o p e n f i r e o n w h a t is essentially a b u n c h of schoolkids.

T h e c h a r a c t e r i s a t i o n s are very s t r o n g , although there is just a t o u c h of stereotyping with the characters s h o w n , the overzealous militaristic type, a n d A l e x , M o r e l a n d ' s r o o m a t e and sometime conscience. These two c h a r a c t e r s a r e p r e s e n t e d as t h e p r i n c i p a l o p p o s i n g influences on M o r e l a n d ' s thinking, and in places, this is in danger of b e c o m i n g a t o u c h cliched. In the end t h o u g h , the acting carries the day, a n d the character clashes w i t h i n t h e r a n k s of t h e c a d e t s a r e a s interesting as the clashes with the troops outside.

T h e result is a film rich in tension, ideas and e x c i t e m e n t . W i l l t h e N a t i o n a l G u a r d be ordered in? If so, will the cadets open fire on them? O r is there s o m e other way out? See it a n d find out.

Dave Jago

Page 9

It is rare that a place like IC gets a chance to host the debut gig of an important new band, and even rarer for a band of the quality of Weekend. It's a pity, then, that more IC students didn't turn up on Wednesday night; ilthough there was a reasonable crowd, a fair .roportion of these were outsiders.

The last thing W e e k e n d want is to be compared to the Y o u n g Marble G i a n t s , although with two-thirds of that band being featured in Weekend they may have some difficulty in avoiding it at first. Alison Statton's v o c a l s are as sublime as ever â&#x20AC;&#x201D; more confident if anything. She certainly seems much more self-assured and relaxed on stage than she used to be. The lead guitarist plays in a beautiful melodic style, largely African influenced, which blends nicely with the vocal line. The use of percussion, addition to drums, provides a good varied rhythmic background.

S o m e of the n u m b e r s use h a m s ; H a r r y Beckett, the trumpet player, is well-known in jazzy circles, but seems a little misplaced here.

Larry Stafford, on the other hand, blends with the style of the band very nicely. This is the more surprising because Larry normally plays only free form and avant garde jazz.

The b a n d s e e m e d a little tense a n d restrained, although with the hype and the high expectations surrounding them this is hardly surprising. They played a secret warm up gig at the R o c k G a r d e n a few days previously, at which they managed to put more bounce into the music. Hopefully this will reappear as soon as they settle down to some regular gigging.

The most apt description of the music would be melodic and quietly exuberant. Probably the best compliment paid them was that the concert was attended and enjoyed by several people who don't listen to and don't like rock music. What more can you say?

Dave Jago

W e d n e s d a y , F e b r u a r y 17 Football IC I vs IC II vs IC III vs IC V vs IC V I vs

UC I U C II U C III Bans II UC IV

0-1 (A) 3-2(A) 3-1(A) 6-1 (A) 6-1(A)

Rugby IC I IC II

QMC I Q M C II

I8-6(A) C-(i(A)

UC

4-5(H)

vs vs

Hockey Ladies vs

S a t u r d a y , F e b r u a r y 20 Football IC II vs IC III vs IC I V vs IC V vs

U C III U C II R H C II R H C III

O-I(A) 1-2(A) 2-3(H) 8-1 (H)

Rugby IC II

O l d Frecmans II

20-0(H)

British Airways

3-l(H)

vs

Hockey IC II vs

Hyde Park Relay S a t u r d a y sees the a r r i v a l of I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e Cross C o u n t r y C l u b ' s a n n u a l spectacular, the H y d e Park Relay. Teams travel from t h r o u g h o u t the U K a n d across the C h a n n e l to p a r t i c i p a t e i n this event, i n c l u d i n g entries s u c h as C h r i s M c G e o r g e a n d C h r i s t i n a B o x e r , b o t h 8 0 0 m c h a m p i o n s , together w i t h Sebastian C o e r u n n i n g for L o u g h b o r o u g h University.

I n a l l there w i l l be m o r e t h a n 120 mens teams a n d 4 0 ladies teams, a l o n g With 10 foreign teams c o m p e t i n g . T h e race is over a fast course w i t h six legs o f three miles for m e n a n d four legs o f t w o miles for ladies.

A f t e r the race, prizes w i l l be presented b y D r A . W a t t s , a f o u n d e r o f the event, to the best foreign t e a m as w e l l as the best h o m e men's a n d ladies' teams. F o l l o w i n g the presentation i n the J C R there w i l l be a p a r t y a n d d i s c o ( w i t h b a r ) w h i c h is o p e n t o e v e r y b o d y , offering a chance to take a d v a n t a g e o f the day's activities.

C o u r s e m a r k e r s a n d other helpers w i l l be needed t h r o u g h o u t the d a y a n d there is a free sweatshirt i f y o u give us a h a n d o n the day.

F o r t i m e s a n d o t h e r d e t a i l s see C r o s s C o u n t r y C l u b officials o r the n o t i c e b o a r d i n the U n i o n B u i l d i n g .

imWaterPolo The H . G . Wells Society will be screening the fifties science fiction classic Forbidden Planet on Monday at 7:30pm in the Sutton Lecture Theatre, Mines Building. The film is based on Shakespeare's The Tempest and includes a fine performance by Walter Pidgen as D r Moebius, as well as an innovative electronic sound track. It is notable for the introduction of Robby the Robot, one of the screen's most celebrated mechanical inventions.

Page 10

L a s t M o n d a y n i g h t was the occasion o f a c r u s h i n g defeat for the W a t e r P o l o C l u b at the hands o f P e n g u i n I , a n a t i o n a l league d i v i s i o n I t e a m . D e s p i t e some aggressive s w i m m i n g o n o u r p a r t , they p u t a w a y 15 goals to o u r 3.

T h e f o l l o w i n g n i g h t , however, saw us o n w i n n i n g f o r m as we i n f l i c t e d a 5-3 defeat o n St B a r t ' s H o s p i t a l . T h i s w a s a somewhat t u r b u l e n t m a t c h d u r i n g w h i c h L a s t , never FELIX,

February

26,

1982

the most subtle of players, was twice sent out for over-enthusiastic f o u l i n g , a n d G a r t o n was also r e m o v e d for r a t h e r obvious k n u c k l i n g o f the o p p o s i t i o n .

L e a c h put about six shots i n the general d i r e c t i o n of the Bart's goal (one of t h e m even went i n ) , but the miss o f the m a t c h a w a r d went, yet a g a i n , to A s h w i n , w h o p u t a n impressive shot at least live feet over the b a r a n d almost into the spectator's gallery.

O n the rare occasions w h e n we got o u r game together we scored a few goals, w h i c h came from C a r t o n , Casini, A s h w i n and L e a c h , b u t i n general, w e p l a y e d a p o o r l y organised game, a n d the o n ly remedy for that is more Fosters.

T e a m : As/twin (Capt), Burnett (goalie), Casini, Dibden, Edwards, Boucher, Garton, Last, Leach,

(fit) Rugby Seconds T h e second team set off a g a i n , m a p a n d compass in hand under theintrepid leadership o f the r e t u r n i n g collapse-a-capt.

T h e game started b a d l y w i t h the C h e m E n g 1 contingent suffering from the previous evening's antics i n Stan's. O u r glorious c a p t a i n i n s p i r e d us to a 6-3 deficit b y halft i m e w h i c h we a t t r i b u t e to his lovers tiff w i t h C h r i s C o l e . I n a tense a n d g r u e l l i n g second half, M a r k H u d s o n k i c k e d us back level. M i c k W i n d s o r then p u l l e d his h a m s t r i n g a n d h a d to retire l e a v i n g N o d d y to step into the breach, p l a y i n g w i t h the grit of a prop f o r w a r d , w h i c h was pretty unfortunate since he was meant to be scrum-half. T h e score r e m a i n e d even though M a r k S i m m o n s received concussion a n d a b r o k e n jaw i n a l a s t - d i t c h tackle, a n d M a r c H u d s o n just missed a p e n a l t y from o u r o w n half.

T i r e d a n d sleepy we w o u n d o u r weary w a y home, seemingly o n ly days later r e c h i n g the c o m f o r t i n g lights o f t o y t o w n a n d bobos.

^

Hockey

Ladies H a v i n g discovered that a W O h a d been d e c l a r e d over St M a r y ' s (League) a n d that a ' f r i e n d l y ' h a d been a r r a n g e d against U C L , h a l f the t e a m decided that they d i d n ' t want to p l a y . C a r o l i n e (alias C a p ' n B i r d s e y e ) reckoned that o u r bodies needed exercise, despite the fact that a few o f us have been ' g e t t i n g i t ' fairly r e g u l a r l y lately.

P l a y i n g w i t h t w o U C L players, 'cos there were o n l y eight o f us, w e m a n a g e d to score the first g o a l . C o n t r i b u t i o n s c a m e f r o m A l i s o n C . (6%), S a r a (10%) a n d K a r e n (84%).

H o w e v e r , A l i s o n later m a n a g e d to n o t c h up a h a t - t r i c k of misses. L u c k i l y , some o f the t e a m h a d been to the o pt i c i a n s recently, a n d this resulted i n S a r a , A l i s o n L . a n d A l i s o n C . m a n a g i n g to find the goal w i t h their shots.

A f t e r the final score o f 5-4 to t h e m , we r e t i r e d to the c h a n g i n g rooms. W h e n we discovered that C a r o l i n e was g o i n g to have a shower, the rest of us decided that the q u i c k e r we get to the b a r , the better.

T e a m : Alison C. Alison L. Alison It'., Sara, Karen, Caroline, Melanie, Ruth R.

Hockey T H E CASE AGAINST BRITISH AIRWAYS " Y o u are c h a r g e d that o n the afternoon o f S a t u r d a y last y o u a n d y o u r team c o n t r i v e d to play the worst t h i r t y - f i v e minutes o f hockey seen for m a n y years a n d yet still h a d th e i m p u d e n c e to lead 1-0 at h a l f - t i m e . D o y o u have a n y t h i n g to say for y o u r s e l f " " W e l l your h o n o u r, we were totally o v e r a w e d b y the occasion. T o p l a y against I C at H a r l i n g t o n is e v e r y p i l o t s d r e a m and " " S i l e n c e ! W e w i l l move o n to the circumstances of y o u r goal. Is it not true that you h a d so m a n y attempts to p u t the b a l l in that the I C C a p t a i n was m o v e d to t h r o w a w o b b l y at his defense." " I ' m a f r a i d so y o u r h o n o u r . I apologise for a n y u n d u e suffering w e m a y have c a u s e d . " " T h a t ' s a l l very w e l l y o u n g m a n , but d i d you not proceed to p l a y e q u a l l y b a d l y t h r o u g h o u t the rest o f the first half, further d e m o r a l i s i n g the I C team w h o were t o t a l l y incapable of scoring." " W e d i d let t h e m score three times i n the second h a l f y o u r L o r d s h i p , the first b e i n g a magnificent goal b y S t r o o m e r , w i t h R h o d e s setting u p the other t w o for M i t c h e l l a n d Wylie." " G r o v e l l i n g w i l l get y o u nowhere y o u pathetic little creature, I've a good m i n d to sentence y o u to two seasons h a r d l a b o u r o n the O l d C r e i g h t o n i a n s potato p a t c h . " " N o ! Please! I ' d r a t h e r p l a y against the team of Pete S h a r p e ' s . " " W e l l , o n this occasion I a m p r e p a r e d to be lenient; y o u are to leave this court a n d spend the rest of the season i n th e very darkest depths at the b o t t o m o f the L e a g u e . " British A i r w a y s — W e took more care o f them!

T e a m : Butler, Junes, Bird, Whitehead, Sharpe, Shindler, Witter, Stroomer, Rhodes, Wylie, Mitchell. Umpire: Gray.

Fifths

Football Q Sailing

A f t e r a notable absence, the team were back at the H a r p o n S a t u r d a y .

C i t y were the first o p p o s i t i o n , a n d after a somewhat d u b i o u s gate start, gave I m p e r i a l O p p o n e n t + b a l l S J ^ I C V + b a l l —(1) 2, 3, 4 at the w i n d w a r d m a r k . O n the first I C V + b a l l = goal —(2) offwind l e g , M i l l s m a n a g e d to c a t c h the O p p o n e n t + b a l l = goal —(3) l e a d i n g boat a n d forced h i m to let K e n n e d y a n d Bennet t h r o u g h at the w i n g m a r k , albeit In m y latest study, the opponents b e i n g w i t h one o r two m i n o r collisions. T h e race R o y a l H o l l o w a y C o l l e g e I I I , the e q u i l i b r i u m finished w i t h I m p e r i a l i n a c o m m a n d i n g i n (1), for the first forty-five minutes was far position a n d C i t y c o n c e d e d the race. to the r i g h t - h a n d side due to h a r d work a n d A f t e r a confusing i n c i d e n t i n the second good r u n n i n g . C o n s e q u e n t l y , step (2) was race, it was d e c i d e d to restart it to a v o i d b a d d o m i n a n t a n d was catalysed effectively b y a feelings a n d a fracas w i t h the o p p o s i t i o n . c o m p l e x k n o w n as D a v e Stephenson, the U n f o r t u n a t e l y I m p e r i a l lost this race a n d the h a l f - t i m e score b e i n g 6-0. I n the latter stages next, thus l o s i n g the m a t c h 1-2. of the r e a c t i o n , the e q u i l i b r i u m i n (1) was A f t e r a break f o r l u n c h (etc.) t h e m o v e d to the left-hand side b y P h i l N i c c o l l s i n t r o d u c t i o n o f a U L ladies crew revitalised a n d the catalyst for reaction (2) was poisoned the team for their p e r f o r m a n c e against Sussex due to the t h o u g h t of two jugs (3 goals + 1 j u g (or was it just G r a h a m w a n t i n g to show off of beer). H o w e v e r , step (3) was i n h i b i t e d by a his n e o p r e n e ? ) . B y t h e e n d of t h e f i r s t strong a n d resourceful defence a n d o n l y one goal was scored, a n d this was d u e to the w i n d w a r d leg, I m p e r i a l h a d a c o m m a n d i n g 1, 2, 6 a n d finished i n these positions. T h e keeper's open legs. T h e reaction was f i n a l l y second race started w i t h Sussex on the gate. t e r m i n a t e d b y the referee's whistle.

A f t e r a d i s a p p o i n t i n g first beat, I m p e r i a l F u r t h e r studies are u n d e r way a n d w i l l be were 2, 3, 6 at the w i n d w a r d m a r k . H o w e v e r , p u b l i s h e d soon. d u r i n g the offwind legs, M i l l s a n d K e n n e d y A c k n o w l e d g m e n t is m a d e to Nick, Nigel, closed the gap between t h e m a n d the l e a d i n g Dave, Mark, Salish, Bobby, Nick, Keith, Dave, boat a n d w i t h excellent t e a m r a c i n g d u r i n g Andy, Steve and Phil. the final beat m a n a g e d to push the Sussex boat to t h i r d place. I m p e r i a l thus w o n 1, 2, 6 a n d to everyone's surprise R e d m a n m a n a g e d to keep out o f trouble at the back of the fleet in b o t h races.

In some recent studies I have shown that the p r e p a r a t i o n o f a w i n takes place i n three steps:

Swimming & Water Polo

Despite a v a r i e t y o f difficulties the t e a m , b a r N i c k L a s t , a r r i v e d i n Bristol i n t i m e for the m a t c h . T h e benefits of t r a i n i n g h a d o b v i o u s l y been spoilt b y some a c t i v i t y the previous night ( L i n k s C a r n i v a l ? ) for we d i d n ' t get a s i n g l e first i n a n y r a c e . W e n d y M o o r e m a n a g e d two second places in contrast to the rest w h o were consistent, i f not fast, a n d frequently o c c u p i e d the m i n o r places i n the races.

Rifle & Pistol C e l e b r a t i n g his r e t u r n to f o r m , c l u b hotshot Steve H a r r i s o n n o t c h ed u p a n o t h e r 97 to complete a n outstanding year with an average of a b o u t 8 5 .

Increasing attendance by female club m e m b e r s caused n e a r - h y s t e r i a amongst the h i e r a r c h y o f the c o m m i t t e e , n o t a b l y D e n i s Sleath (club c a p t a i n , contact v i a M e c h E n g letter-racks) w h o wasobserved quietly d r o o l i n g i n the c o r n e r d u r i n g quiet periods.

In t h e e v e n i n g D e n i s m a d e f u r t h e r a d v a n c e s to m e m b e r s w h i l s t u n d e r t h e influence of food a n d w i n e at the a n n u a l c l u b d i n n e r held i n a discrete bistro i n S o u t h K e n s i n g t o n . I n a short but m o v i n g speech he expressed his desire that th e c l u b w o u l d prosper u n d e r new l e a d e r s h i p next year.

Unfortunately T i m Higg's continuous c h a t t e r r a t h e r took the edge off this " g u s h i n g verbal torrent".

S u n d a y ' s t r i p to Bisley s h o u l d p r o v i d e further e n t e r t a i n m e n t l o r p a r t i c i p a n t s .

T e a m : Sleath, Harrison, Smith, Higgs, Helen of Troy, Sarah B., Michelle, Kev, Denk-al-Alam, Tony Briers, etc.

Scores: Bristol UL Imperial

Men 76 62 32

Ladies 86 57

Team: It'. Moore, J. Campbell, /*". Lye, N. Hammond. R. [.each, J. Boucher, R. Boucher, G. Singleton, B. Ashwin.

In the w a t e r polo m a t c h against Bristol we h a d o u r r e p u t a t i o n shot to pieces i n a 17-3 t h r a s h i n g . T h e s w i m m i n g m a t c h m a y have tired some o f o u r p l a y e r s , b u t we were c o m p l e t e l y outclassed. C o n s o l a t i o n goals came from M a x C a s i n i (2), a n d J i m Boucher.

The rest ol us weren't r e a l l y c o n c e n t r a t i n g on the game; P a u l h a d a go at a l l - i n w r e s t l i n g , C h r i s used his best A n g l o - S a x o n words i n conversation w i t h the ref, a n d R i c h c a s u a l l y s w a m from e n d to e n d occasionally a d m i r i n g the way M a r t i n p i c k e d the b a l l out o f the net.

Team: R. Leach, C. Carton, J. Boucher, B. Ashwin, M. Casini, P. Edwards, M. Burnett, J. Dickinson.

FELIX, February

26, 1982

T e a m : Bennet, Butler, Redman, Tounghusband.

§

Kennedy,

Mills,

Rugby

Seconds T h e d a y started at the u n e a r t h l y h o u r o f 9:45, w h e n despite the C a r n i v a l , most people a r r i v e d on t i m e , t h o u g h some were o b v i o u s l y still feeling the effects o f d r i n k . T h i s a n d the fact that we were o n l y given ten m i n u t e s to change led to a very slow start b y I C . S o o n the pack, w i t h C . D e R o h a n m a k i n g his debut and our collapsible captain, Bell, began to take c o n t r o l . It wasn't l o n g before R a l p h scored from a five y a r d (1.5 metre) s c r u m . T h i s was h o w it r e m a i n e d u n t i l halft i m e w h e n t h e o r a n g e s s e e m e d to w a k e e v e r y b o d y u p . T h e r e then followed a n u m b e r of fluent moves, w i t h N o d d y a p p e a r i n g e v e r y w h e r e . T h i s resulted i n four tries o f w h i c h two were especially good as e v e r y b o d y had a h a n d i n t h e m . T h e tries by N i c B r u m m e l , A l a s t a i r D a v i e s , Jose P a x a i o a n d M a r c H u d s o n were a l l i n the corners a n d so left M a r c w i t h little chance of c o n v e r t i n g t h e m . T h u s the final score was 20-0.

T h e n it was d o w n the p u b a n d back i n t i m e to w a t c h E n g l a n d try to p l a y r u g b y .

T e a m : M. Hudson, A. Davies, N. Brummel, W. Chapman, O. Miles, M. Thompson, J. Paxaio, S. Bell, C. De Rohan, P. Bateson, D. Bradley, M. Jackson, P. Hughes-Narborough, A. Ralph, B. Hinmers.

Page 11

you aren't fooled by overolown claims or stupid points.

RCS Elections Confusion seems to have arisen following yesterday's R C S Hustings U G M . Several people have told me that Miss Moira Yarston, who is standing for R C S President, claimed to have been Aberdeen S U President. However, she has since approached me to reassure people that she did no such thing. I can only assume it was a slip of the tongue or bad inferrence which gave people this impression, so don't let it influence your decision in any way (voting Monday).

Sabbaticals!

The publicity for the candidates standing in the sabbatical elections will soon be filling every available space in College. The Hustings U G M next Thursday (1:00pm Great Hall) is usually the best U G M of the y e a r . T a k e t h i s opportunity to investigate the candidates, ask them questions and sort out the time wasters from the good candidates (if there are any!).

A special FELIX insert will be published next Friday containing election manifestos. These are usually good for a laugh, but be careful that

What's On Friday, February 26 • A n t i - A p a r t h e i d p i c k e t of R T Z . See Careers noticeboard. Also on Monday, March 1.

•Socialist Society bookstall, 12:30 2:30pm, Junior Common Room. Books and Campaign Coffee for sale.

• I C Angling club meeting, 12:30pm, Southside Bar Lounge.

• B U N A C meeting, 12:30pm, Green Comm Rm. •Supplies to Poland, 12:45pm. Meeting for people wanting to travel to Poland.

• M o p s o c Annual Dinner, speaker Prof New, 7:00 for 7:30pm. Tickets £5.50 from Mopsoc officials.

• S o u p R u n , 10:30pm, Falmouth Kitchen.

Saturday, February 27 • C r o s s Country Club: Hyde Park Relay, start 2:30, Rotten Row. Spectators and helpers welcome.

Sunday, February 28 • W e s t London Chaplaincy communion service Preacher: Alan de Grys, Chaplain to Westfield and Bedford Colleges, 10:00am, Consort Gallery. Followed by meditation workshop.

• C r o s s Country C l u b : Handicap race, Richmond Park. Competing for the Petersham Cup. AH members are invited to attend.

•Wargames club meeting, 1:00pm, Union S C R .

Monday, March 1 • H a n g - g l i d i n g c l u b m e e t i n g , 12:30pm, above Southside Bar. •Badgesoc meeting, 12:40pm, Southside Bar Lounge.

• F r e e lunchtime consort, 1:00pm, Consort Gallery.

Programme includes: Stravinsky: Symphonies of wind instruments; Weber: Andante and Hungarian Rondo.

Soloist Cheh-ngee Goh. •Socialist society general meeting, 6:30pm, Green Comm Rm. • D a n c i n g club advanced class, 7:30pm, JCR. • R a g Meeting, 5:45pm, Union Upper Lounge.

Tuesday, March 2 • B o a r d s a i l i n g c l u b m e e t i n g , 12:30 and 6:15pm, Southside Upper Lounge.

•Catholic mass and lunch, 12:30pm, Chem 231.

Nominal charge for lunch.

•Riding club meeting, 1:00pm, Rm 1009, Elec Eng. • S T O I C p r o g r a m m e : Live debate between I C U Presidential candidates, 1:00pm, J C R , Southside T V Lounge, Southside, Beit, Weeks and Linstead Halls.

Erratum: Due to blind panic by the S F Soc Secretary the date of The Big Bus given in the SF Soc article should be a week on Tuesday Credits Many thanks to Peter, Soheel, Martin S., Lesley, Dave J . , Steve, Ralph, Jill, Dave R., all the collators (especially Jez, M o , Soheel, Jon and the Guilds mob who helped me late last week).

A special t h a n k - y o u to F r a n c e s , who normally helps Paul deliver and who managed by herself last week.

• A Lecture by Dr C . Wright, Head of Taxonomic Research on "Numerical Taxonomy', 1:00pm, Botany Basement.

• M o p s o c lecture 'What is Science?', 1:10pm, Physics LT2.

• D e p t of Humanities presents: 1. Films: The Private Life of the Starling; The Private Life of the Great Crested Grebe, 1:15pm, Read Theatre.

2. The Origins of Astronomy Pt 3. Copernicus and the Downfall of Ptolemaic Astronomy, Emeritus Professor G . J . Whitrow, Senior Research Fellow, Imperial College, 1:30pm, Pippard Theatre.

• I C Amnesty group meeting, 5:30pm, Green Comm Rm.

After Captain Birdseye, the Domesticated Secretary of Primelia College, had stood and counted all the people visiting 'Meet P C he decided to get a more detailed breakdown of their number. Amble, Bumble, Crumble and Drudge were each in charge of a stall, and the good Captain asked Amble how many visitors each of the four stalls had had.

"Well," replied Amble, "the product of the four numbers is 270. No stall had fewer visitors than mine, and each of the people visiting the exhibition came to just one of our four stalls."

"I'm afraid you haven't given me enough information," retorted the Captain after a little reflection, "I can't even deduce the four numbers, let alone which number belongs to which stall."

"You're quite right, I haven't given you enough information; let me also say that the difference between the numbers of Bumble's visitors and Crumble's visitors is at least as large as the number of people who did not visit Bumble's stall."

But this was all too much for Captain Birdseye, whose stomach was recalling a particularly choppy night on the Isle of Wight ferry. But that was his own fault, as Amble had now given him enough information to deduce the numbers of visitors to each of the four stalls.

How many?

Solutions, comments, criticisms to me at the FELIX Office please. A prize of £5 (donated by Mend-a-Bike) for the correct solution randomly selected at 1:00pm on Wednesday.

• M e t & Mat S c i society lecture 'Fire and Explosives'

by Dr K. Gugan, 6:00pm, RSM G20.

•3F*s F r e n c h restaurant trip to New Maple Grill, Victoria, meet 7:00pm, Southside Bar. •Dan ci n g club beginners' class, 7:30pm, JCR. • I C C A G Soup R u n , 10:30pm, Falmouth Kitchens.

Wednesday, March 3 •Wargames club meeting, 1:00pm, Union SCR. • A n t i - A p a r t h e i d m e e t i n g , 1:00pm, Union Upper Lounge.

• A s t r o s o c meeting, 3:30pm, 'Waveguide', Physics Building (Level 1). Free to members.

• I C Trampoline society meeting, 5:30pm, Courtauld Hall, Q E C , Campden Hill Rd. •Dan ci n g club intermediate class, 7:30pm, J C R .

Thursday, March 4 • S c o u t a n d G u i d e c l u b m e e t i n g , with Richard Turnbull of Alpine Sports talking about his expedition, 12:30pm, Mines 303. All welcome.

• S T O I C presents News-Break, 1:00 and 6:00pm, usual places (see Tuesday).

•Overseas students lunch, 12:30pm, Rm 703, Mech Eng. Free. Informal lunch and entertainment provided by Mech Eng Christian Union bible study group. Everyone welcome.

•Christian Science group meeting, 1:00pm, Seminar Rm, Level 2S, Botany.

•Industrial Society presents Sir Walter Goldsmith speaking on Industrial Democracy, 1:00pm, Mech Eng 220.

•Gliding club meeting, 5:30pm, Aero 254.

• I C Latin American Society presents a film: The Mexican Frozen Revolution, 6:00pm, Union Upper Lounge.

• E n t s film Being There, 6:30pm, ME220, 50p.

Last Week's Competition About a dozen entries, only one correct despite the warning that it was an engineering problem. Scores of people gloatingly told me that the problem is done as a worked example for physics first years; none of them seemed to appreciate that the physicists' method is a general method which extends to an arbitrary number of dominoes. When you are restricted to a fixed number (four, in this case) a little ingenuity carries you a long way — a quarter of an inch, to be exact.

The physicists' method as shown in the first diagram gives an overhang of 2 / ". The better method (second diagram) gives you 2V3".

Paddy Andrews, Mech Eng 3 can collect his cheque on Monday afternoon, since his diagram was the best submitted. Amazingly, for an engineer, his calculated overhang was correct, although the calculation itself was wrong.

1

•Sherry Party, 6:0pm, Union SCR. Sherry party for all third year mathematicians and physicists to meet old students and learn about the Royal College of Science Association. Free.

• D e p t of Humanities presents Lunchhour concert with Penelope Roskell (piano), 1:30pm, Music Room, 53 Princes Gate. Sponsored by. the Winston Churchill Memorial Trust.

12

FELIX is published by the Editor for and on behalf of the Imperial College Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road, London SW7 2BB (589-5111 ext 1048 int 2881) Copyright FELIX

1982. Editor: M A Smith, Advertising Manager: S M Giblin.