FELIX
The student newspaper of Imperial College Issue 1059 May 31st 1996
I C U "Job shop" plans thwarted Y Plans for a new 'job shop' for Imperial students have been, put on hold because of a lack of funding. Union staff had planned to set up an employment agency as a service for hard-up students, but claim their plans have been thwarted by an unsupportive Finance department. The scheme would have kept a database of student skills and availabilities which would then be matched with part-time Professor Colin Poole of the analytical chemistry department has been inundated with calls from the press over the past week following the recent health scare on so-called gender-bending drugs in babies' milk. Professor Poole dismissed the debate on whether thiolates in milk could endanger the babies fertility as being "a total nonstarter." He explained that the amount of thiolate in the highest contaminated samples he tested were ten times below the accepted level. Professor Poole explained that the contaminants were, very common, and as they are present in plastics, children are more
vacancies in college as the need arose. ICU had been hoping for funds to support a full-time member of staff for two years to implement the programme, after which the system would be reappraised. Mike Hansen, IC Director of finance, insisted that he had given the scheme "a huge amount of support" even though "we haven't given them any money, because that's not the way we do it." Imperial College Union
receives its funding in a lumpsum subvention, and College puts no constraints on how it is allocated. Mr Hansen said that if the Union felt that establishing a jobshop was an important student service, then they "should sacrifice something else to fund it." Defending the College's stance, he exclaimed, "Just saying, 'Oi, Guv, give us an extra ÂŁ17,000' just isn't the way we do it, regrettably." He also raised questions over the welfare implications of
College actively encouraging students to work whilst studying full-time. Matthew Crompton, I C U Deputy President (Finance and Services] insisted that the proposition would have saved IC money in the long run. Imperial's sports' centre, catering, conferences and residences divisions have spent over ÂŁ200,000 to date on agency fees in order to fill job vacancies. Although many of the Continued on page, two
likely to get high doses of them from sucking the bottle, than from the milk itself. But Professor Poole welcomed the more general discussion on public health information. "The tendency has been to panic the public rather than inform them," he said, citing the recent "appallingly handled" BSE crisis as an example. Professor Poole spoke to six newspaper reporters and two television stations on Tuesday. He was interviewed for Canadian television last night. "It was, for a very short time, a big debate," he said, "Maybe they didn't have much news that day." P
y Despite the increasing disturbance to student studying during the exam period by the basement excavation, the library has taken steps to curb noise: mobile phones are now banned, page 2
e Steve Ellis, IC Boat Club's coach, has gone to Lucerne for the Olympic qualifying regatta, which will determine whether he will represent Britain in Atlanta this summer.
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e The 'High Fliers' survey of students at elite universities has revealed that only 27% of Imperial graduates expect to begin a full-time job when they graduate. 2
O
FELI
FRIDAY MAY 31ST 1 9 9 6
NEWS
continued from page one
positions available would be unsuitable lor casual student staff because of the skills and hours required, the College have a continuing need for part-time cleaning and waitering staff. Matt insisted that the plans would have provided an "excellent service for students who need money, giving them reliable places to work and good employers." H e said that setting up a specifically student-orientated ageney would help to relieve the problem of hard-up students being abused by unscrupulous employers. Insisting that College authorities "are trying to be sympathetic and constructive," Mike Hansen said "we're not going to say you can't and we're not going to say you mustn't". He said the idea was 'intuitively attractive' and said the College would be willing to pay a fee for the service of a system which could help provide casual staff once it was set up.
Silence in the library? Y As substantial excavation work continues outside the Lyon Playfair Library, I C ' s SubLibrarian Richard Halls has said he is 'monitoring the situation closely'. H e insisted that the contractors Schal International were doing everything possible to minimise disturbance to students during their exams, and that there had been no official complaints. The 'noise is quite localised', he said. The workmen have been doing all the 'heavy noise work' between 8 and 9.30am, before the library opens. M r Hall said that the noise was largely unavoidable if the plans, which will include a concert hall, a humanities centre and a new bookstore in a building with two new floors are to go ahead. " W e haven't hit any snags," he said, explaining that the 'really noisy part' won't begin until July I st, when a crane will be installed on the roof. H e said that library staff are 'planning like mad' to arrange for parts of
He suggested that I C U might use some of their profits from their trading outlets, including the college bookshop, to finance the venture. But Union staff say they no longer feel confident of the bookstore revenue. Rental of the new enlarged shop is expected to go out to tender this summer, and it is possible that I C U will lose the outlet to a large chain, such as Dillons or Blackwells. "The job shop is exactly the sort of initiative that will suffer if we don't have the bookstore," Matt Crompton insisted.
A poll of over 10,000 of the U K ' s best finalists showed that only 27% expected to start work on completing their course. Nearly a quarter planned to continue studying, although approximately one in ten had no fixed plans at all.
Revenue from the bookstore accumulated over recent years will be spent this summer on refurbishments to I C U ' s Beit Quad premises. A ÂŁ 1 0 0 , 0 0 0 refit of the Entertainments Lounge, as well as a possible new clubs and societies room has been planned. Matt defended the spending: "When a student goes round on open days, they look at the university's social facilities, and we need to improve them... If we lose some of our trading we will lose some of our ability to upgrade the facilities."
Information from Britain's top 24 universities cites the B B C and British Airways as being graduates' most favoured employers. But there are indications that today's students are more entrepreneurial then ever before, as the category of 'self-employed' ranked third in the ratings. Other choices named when students were asked, "If you could work for any organisation of your choice, what would it be?" included Baywatch, The Mafia, The Sultan of Brunei, Playboy, Ann Summers and W o r l d of Leather.
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the collection to be relocated while building gets underway. H e admitted that there would be some disruption to library services over the summer, but said that staff were planning to increase students' book loan
allowances so they could take their books to study elsewhere if the noise disturbance became to great. A new temporary entrance will be located in the Sherfield building by the Great Hall while work on the new lobby proceeds.
News in brief o
E The London School of Economics is set to have a budget deficit of ÂŁ2.5 million this year. Governors are said to be 'very worried,' fearing that the disastrous showing will have serious implications for the institutions long-term competitiveness and standing. Kate Hampton, LSE Students' Union President, has said that she is concerned that the deficit will lend weight to the argument that students should be charged top-up fees.
T s A week after the Labour Party announced its plans to replace student grants with a long-term loans system, the Association of University Teachers has also abandoned its long-standing support for a return to state-
funded grants for all students. Delegates at last week's annual conference voted to press all political parties to address underfunding, insisting that the current Dearing inquiry should not use present funding levels as a starting point for its review.
K The U K has shown the lowest growth in expenditure on research of all the Gr o u p of Seven leading industrial nations over the past ten years. The U K ' s gross domestic expenditure on science, technology and engineering was ÂŁ14.6 billion, giving it an 'average' rating in comparison to its competitors. But the funding levels have not been increasing as much as other countries. Expenditure here increased by 18%, compared with 45% in Germany, and 93% in Japan.
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FRIENDS OR FAMILY VISITING LONDON IN T H E SUMMER? B e d and Breakfast accommodation available i n Halls o f Residence i n Princes Gardens from 1 July - 27 September Single room -£25.00 per night T w i n room - £40.00 per night (Rates inclusive o f full E n g l i s h breakfast, V A T and daily servicing o f rooms)
For a brochure and further information please contact the Conference Office on: Tel: 0171 594 9507 or Ext. 49507 or E m a i l : vacation.accommodation@ic.ac.uk
STAYING IN LONDON DURING T H E SUMMER? A c c o m m o d a t i o n available i n Halls o f Residence i n E v e l y n Gardens from 1 July - 27 September
Single room - £47.88 per week Shared room £34.09 per week, per person For reservations, please contact the Conference Office on: Tel: 0171 594-9507 or ext. 49507 or E m a i l : vacation.accommodation@ic.ac.uk Please note that one month's payment in advance is required in order to guarantee a booking Payment will be due in full if stay is less than 30 days. •
"An unrelenting challenge to conventional notions of gender, culture, age and language..." Tragic Anatomies is a wonderland of turf, flowers and trees, but with its flawlessly crafted wide-eyed innocents mutated into strange monstrosities. Cyber-iconic Man represents an extreme form of torture in an exploration of the death-drive. Cheering stuff indeed. At the Institute of Contemporary Arts, The Mall, SW1Y 5AH, until 14th July.
Sgbapmanworld exhibition: chapmanworkLhd column: simon baker* insight: food for thought album: the cure - wild mood swings™* • album: various - in order to dance yol.6^ p** interview/gig: stabbing westwards • singles:.., gig: smashing pumpkins,, film: secrets and l i e s ^ » film: up close and personalpxky •ny
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simon baker England expects every man to do his duty... and eat his beef.' So The Sun greeted the news that John Major had 'declared war' on Europe after over two months of almost total inaction. Douglas Hogg, as Agriculture Minister, has proved completely ineffectual in dealing with the problem, probably meriting dismissal, and heralding the response of the Prime Minister. It is undoubtedly the case that the •noncooperation policy was in part to fend off the prospect of cabinet resignations among the Eurosceptic ranks, but the adverse press reaction in the last few days is unjustified. Here we have a situation where Britain has given considerable ground over recent times on the promise of a relaxation of the export ban on derivative products, only to be rebuffed on every occasion. In the light of this, the frustration of John Major is completely understandable, but to view his actions as those of a desperate man is wholly misguided. The options open to Britain to deal with the intolerable intransigence of the other member states are so limited that the blanket scuppering of unanimous voting was almost the only legal option open to Britain. Many will call this a petty example of the malice of Little Englanders, of xenophobia and misguided nationalism, when in fact all that is being attempted is the defence of our national interest. It is all very well to criticise the actions of Britain, but one must look at the incessant procrastination of the E U . One positive benefit to come out of this unfortunate situation is a close examination of Britain's position in the E U and vice versa. It is very unfortunate that the debate on Europe in Britain has become polarised between those who believe in withdrawal and those who believe in an inexorable move towards a federal Europe. Both are, of course, patently ridiculous standpoints. The benefits of membership are clear to see, in the central areas of free trade and freedom of movement. This is where Europe works well. The Single Market has functioned pretty well and should represent the last radical change in the EU. We should now be embarking on a process of evolution to refine the system, tackling weaknesses such as the ludicrous Common Agricultural Policy. The problem is that much of the rest of Europe, led by Germany, seems hell-bent on federalism and monetary union. Already we have a situation where the sovereignty of the U K government is being regularly undermined by the European Court and directives are being passed on the most trivial aspects of life. We are seen as bad Europeans for dissenting from the current goals of the EU, but it must be remembered that most of these policies did not exist in any shape or form at the time of our joining, nor was federalism identified as a future aim. Given
that we appear to have been sold a dummy, I think we are more than justified in being a little peeved. As I'm sure you will appreciate, dear reader, I am not a man who likes to say 'I told you so' (and if you believe that...) However, while poring over old copies of Felix, I noticed in issue 1040 that I expressed my doubts about your friend and mine Ghassan Karrian, erstwhile U L U president. I said that 'we are mere pawns in the Karrian game plan designed to propel him into Westminster.' And what do you know, as soon as the N U S have been kicked into line, paving the way for Labour's new loans scheme (I think that's U tum no. 245), our man does a runner to reemerge as Senior Campaigns Coordinator for West London, baby-kisser-fn-chief. To call his actions cynical doesn't even come close to describing the despicable way in which he has behaved of late. Arguably his absence will help U L U immeasurably, since he doesn't seem to have done much for London's students this year and we can only wait for Sarah White to pick up the pieces left by him. The tiling to do now is to get him removed from the post, by a vote of no confidence or any other trick in the constitutional rulebook, so that he realises that we are not prepared to tolerate his behaviour. As for becoming a Labour spindoctor, he has all the right qualities: arrogance, the ability to sacrifice anyone or anything for the cause, deception and the skill of speaking in such vague terms that it is barely possible to discern his subject, let alone viewpoint. Ghassan Karrian makes Peter Mandelson look positively wholesome, which is probably the most vitriolic attack one can make on a Labour supporter. Having dwelt on Europe somewhat this week, there is not much space for news in College, which is just as well since nothing has happened. I could talk about the Rag fete, but I can hardly bring myself to intrude on private grief. As I said to one of the Raggies recendy, when asked why I hadn't mentioned them for months, I don't like to kick a man when he's down. That said, I could not help laughing at the news that only six people pitched up, most of them Rag hacks. I know the weather was awful, prompting the relocation, but this does suggest that the interest in the event was on a par with a Socialist Worker rally in Belgravia. OK, I lied about the grief intrusion bit. Finally, more disturbing conversations in Southside Bar. I, and earlier one of the bar staff, had an animated discussion with one of the punters, who passionately believed that the beer in the Union was better than in Southside. As I realised my chances of making him see sense were on a par with the likelihood of converting the Pope to Protestantism, we had to agree to disagree.
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Food for Thought The
p n a d t and good l health s well known. However, the latest h s to a r k n food and l . Tony Cripps reveals how g y d e a mental t to help exam .
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t's exam time. Endless study and revision makes you hungry but you feel guilty taking time off to cook for yourself or to go out for a meal. Instead you choose to save time by taking the convenience route - a burger, fish and chips, kebab or the like from the local take-away. Sounds familiar? In fact, although it may give you extra study time, a fast food diet may actually compromise your exam performance.
than just an old wive's tale. Another important factor affecting brain power is the presence of neurotransmitters (NTs) that carry messages from neurone to neurone. The precursors from which the body manufactures NTs are also supplied in the diet. A shortage of precursors in what we eat may result in a deficiency in NTs which can severely disrupt the workings of the brain. Functions such as memory, attention and mood may be most at risk f your diet does not contain enough N T precursors.
A diet containing a lot of saturated fat and cholesterol may not just lead to obesity and heart disease A good example of this is the shortage of acetylbut may also severely curtail intellectual functioning. choline (ACh) in the brains of Alzheimer's patients. High blood cholesterol, and the blood fat triglyceride, This lack of A C h produces a marked impairment of are associated with depression and consequently with memory. However, according to Barbara Strupp of reduced levels of concentration and motivation. Cornell University, raising the level of the precursor, Academic performance will tend to suffer as a result. choline, in the diet of Alzheimer's sufferers may help Charles Glueck of the Jewish Hospital, to alleviate the problem and slow the degeneration of Cincinnati, attributes these effects to 'blood sludgi- the brain. A report produced by the American army ness' caused by saturated fats. This makes it harder in 1994 indicates that increased choline intake in the for the blood to transport sufficient oxygen to a rav- form of eggs, organ meats (liver, kidneys etc.) and leguminous vegetables such as peas and enous brain. Brain activity is consequently beans, in the diet of normal people may reduced and, in the long-term, neuronal ' The old similar, albeit lesser, effects on memhave death may result. This is confirmed by the adage that ory and reaction time. presence of mini brain-lesions and blood In addition to EFAs and N T precursors, clots in the brains of experimental rats fed fish is brain the brain also needs a continuous supply on a high fat diet. The best advice would be food seems of glucose to power its activity. to cut down on these foods in your diet if you want to keep up a good academic to be more Furthermore, ingesting sugary foods such as chocolate (from which glucose is record. than just an obtained] may cause the brain to release Despite this, some fats are essential to old wives' endorphins, its natural opiates, giving a healthy brain functioning, specifically the strong sense of well-being. Experiments essential fatty acid (EFA) linolenic acid, tale.' with both rats and people have found that also called n-3. It is a vital component of a well-timed shot of glucose can greatly brain cell membranes and needs constant improve mental functioning on a variety refreshing. It is no surprise, then, that a lack of tasks. of n-3 is likely to have negative effects on brain function. Paul Gold, a psychologist at the University of Virginia, has found that the Experiments conducted by William biggest improvement in human subjects is Connor, of Oregon Health Services University, confirm this idea. A lack of n-3 during the on reading retention tests. This would be of obvious development of Rhesus monkeys lead to conspicuous advantage to students cramming for exams but Gold neurological defects. In cats, a good supply of n-3 pro- advises caution. Too much glucose can trigger a hypotects against brain damage and aids repair when dam- glycaemic response, similar to diabetes, and actually reduce mental performance by depleting blood gluage occurs as in the case of cerebral stroke. Thesefindingsgive reason to believe that a lack cose. However, in moderation, sugars such as glucose of n-3 may compromise intellectual performance in may well have a beneficial effect on our intellectual adult humans. However, the polyunsaturated oils, functioning. Try experimenting! The field of nutritional neuroscience is only in its such as sunflower oil, promoted for health reasons contain little n-3. Connor argues that rapeseed, soy- early stages but already the tradings suggest that a bean and walnut oils would make better alternatives, more carefully controlled diet may benefit the mind, providing mental, as well as physical, health benefits. as well as the body. If you choose to try any of these Better still is fish oil, the n-3 derived from it most methods to improve exam performance it's probably closely resembling the cell membranes of neurones. not advisable to expect success, but you may become The old adage that fish is brain food seems to be more a better cook.
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Like it cs*BDt, alternative music is now very much the m instream. Gone are the days when arenas and st^d||j||i|l;:ffie sole presefve of the so-called "supergroups Nowadays, the stages of these venues are graced by the kind of subversive lavabouts you: iriotiaetยงlwj|ยงs told you to steer clear of. Nirvana started the trend. Within tltree years ol playing tiny underground clubs, they were doing the stadium circuit in America. Pearl Jam followed and overnight there were hundreds ol grungey, Nirvana np-offs touring tlx world and : ultimately boring the pants off us. One of the sad"; consequences of this trend is that the good bands, the ones you used to love going to see in nice, small, intimate venues are playing enormous, soulless caverns like Wembley Arena. If you haven't seen a band at Wembley Arena then just imagine sitting in a huge box with a transistor radio at hill volume at one end. Fortunately, Smashing Pumpkins are good enoughforthe big sound to go a long way towards filling the said box. To be lair to them they're not a Nirvana rip-off, having arrived on the scene at about the same time, and they've managed to achieve massive success without comproniising their music in any way. Tonight they play a brilliant set, most ol which album, 'Mellon Collie A: The most striking thing about tiier nice is how mellow they've become. It's a l a far from the time when Bil ;
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rip his hair out and smash up the band's equipment three .songs into the set. Actually, he's shaved is hair off completely and stays rooted to the centre of the stage for most of the gig, leaning over h; ^ guitar, and looking not dissimilar to an extra from Alien Nation. He's obsessed with his end ui song 'How much distortion a i 1 get Out of my guitar?" routines, though. The problem is that he's rubbish at it. There's none of the weird and wonderful noises that people HI and .1 Mascis ol Dinosaur Jr. coach out of their stiiStars, just a wall of uninspiring n&Si Ifcnly points where the crowd i ifcalbored, waiting patiently for the spoilt child to finish pkjihjf with his toy. Apart from that it's great, ii...i |fene big emotion overloac I and tonight is no exception. Something about & | ^ H R 3 ^ W W ||ou start wallowing in ahe||l!Hi!or other, eyeii if you've no idea what Billy's ranting about. The Fast, angry ones con S : ; O T a
kids screai 1 > I'm srilfpi: :::arat in a cage.''Mow true. Except that it's more :Af a box really They play three encores featuring an unlikely :
:
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who managed to get tickets for the following l l j j i t at Brixton i f e d e r ^ t ^ I M F
THE BIG BREAKFAST UNTIL JUNE 28TH1996 ยฃ2.00
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o d t
I All in all it
8 p m EVERY TUESDAY
B E E R £50 CASH PRIZE 8 more! SJi
H\z>— HE B iNION I W
STA TRAVEL SUPPORTED
•WrffTlTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTrPfflTTl
U P R E P A R E
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Wed 5th at 8.15pm Thurs 6th at 6pm
T O G O B A L L I S T I C ! ... :.7.7
;
Jill
UI
llll
Hill
TRAVOLTA HACKMAN RUSSO Dillll 1
i
W I N N E R GOLDEN GLOBE -BEST ACTOR illlHN TRAVOLTA-
T Wed 5th at 6pm Thurs 6th at 8.36pm s U a
June 2nd is NATIONAL CINEMA DAY All films in all cinemas will cost £1 See press for details. SUPPORTED
BY STA TRAVEL,
IMPERIAL
COLLEGE
TEL: 0171 S81
8882
STA
TRAVEL]
Bmmnimiiinnmini
c e l l u l o i d guide:,;,
â&#x20AC;˘ragrn hiiifem road 0171
primal fear
kid-
film: up close and personals fxxiky Bearing a passing resemblance to Gus Van Sant's To Die For, Up Close and Personal follows meteoric rise of a small-town nobody to big-time T V personality, but whilst the former was a wickedly satirical black comedy, this is little more than a standard rags-to-riches story. Michelle Pfeiffer plays Tally Atwater, who gets a job at a Florida local news station run by former big-shot Warren Justice (Robert Redford). He takes it upon himself to groom Atwater into network material and predictably they fall in love. Then she moves to Philadelphia to become an anchorwoman and begins to flounder, until Justice quits his job to join her. This is hardly the most original of plots and
film: secrets and lies.
idals
^S:/4^7.^^l^d I am unwilling to give away too much of the plot: suffice to say that this film centres around two siblings; Cynthia (Brenda Blethyn), a dowdy single mother with a grown-up daughter and a factory job, and Maurice (Timothy Spall), a successful portrait photographer with a wife and a big house, but no children. The film spans the a month or so before a barbecue held to celebrate Cynthia's daughter Roxanne's twenty-first birthday, and the rising tensions are triggered by Hortense (Marianne Jean-Baptiste), a young woman who becomes friendly with Cynthia.
si\ ivls aihl lies
mr hollaod's opus 230, 6.15 12 mouke\s :3;|5 :|lli:Birdt|jge A 1 iK'fAAO e\.n nine dei ision b < I, " >0 :
;
ÂŁ6.20, ÂŁ3.70 students and ''
The acting in this film is excellent, and Brenda Blethyn is especially good, but to single
â&#x20AC;˘
F R E S H
H A I R
the only redeeming aspects of the film are the performances from Pfeiffer and Redford. Somehow, despite the script, they manage to maintain their dignity and there is even some chemistry between them. The supporting cast the aren't given enough screen time to be more than instantiy forgettable and it is only Stockard Channing's super-bitch anchor who leaves any lasting impression. Up Close... is a typical Hollywood studio movie, which relies on the pulling power of its stars rather than the quality of the script. This is a nice, safe, feel-good movie; the person upon whom the Atwater character was based actually lost her network spot due to a cocaine overdose and died at 35. Such socially unacceptable character development would appear to be unsuitable, even if it would have made a better film.
her out would be unfair. This film really works because you do not see any actors at all, only people you walk past on the street every day. The main difference between this film and Naked, Mike Leigh's last film, is that Secrets and Lies is not as down-beat. The characters are not so tired of the world, and although their lives are often painful, they remain optimistic. like Naked, there is also plenty of humour to lighten the load, and the background musical ditty is upbeat, saying "there is something about to happen, life isn't dull!" My only warning about this film is its length; at 140 minutes long, be prepared for it to eat up your evening. Otherwise I could not recommend it more.
S A L O N
â&#x20AC;˘
e
" C U T B Y
fit
BLOW
DRY
O U RT O P S T Y L I S T S
ÂŁ 1 4 ÂŁ 1 2 Normal
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w h e r e to find us! ISA H A R R I N G T O N R O A D , SOUTH KENSINGTON, L O N D O N S W 7 3ES I minute
walk
South Kensington
Call: 0171 823
from
Tube
Station!!
8968
GET READY - GET FRESH!
Access, Visa, Mastercard, Cash, Cheques
n
F
X
F
M
31
D
1996
Saturday
friday
31
Sunday
r l p m . T o p floor o f I C U .
(R)
g I. 1 0 p m E n t s L o u n g e .
(R)
Gliding at Lasham Airfield. Contact gliding@ic.ac.uk. Come to the Thursday meeting first. (R)
S a t u r d a y
!
g 5 - 7 p m . U n i o n G y m . Beginners w e l c o m e . 1st lesson free. (R)
s 5.30pm. Advanced Step A e r o b i c s . S o u t h s i d e G y m . (R)
s 9 - 2 a m . H o t f o u r b a n d action!'. T h e r e t u r n of t h e C o l l e g e b a n d night... Abandon 2. T h e f o u r bands in action are Pause, F o l d , Urban Spice & Funk 'n' D i s o r d e r l y , bringing y o u a w i d e range of u p and c o m i n g talent. If y o u w a n t t o c o m e a n d s u p p o r t o u r o w n talent, t h e first b a n d is d u e o n stage at 9 p m . T i c k e t s are a measly £1 o n t h e d o o r or free before 9 p m , so get there early and take advantage of the special o f f e r o n C a r l s b e r g Ice (only £1 a go!) And
once
the bands
have
finished, t h e C o m m o n People take over t h e d e c k s t o b r i n g y o u the finest selection o l t o p c u r rent & retro Indie tunes. T h e r e ' s also a c h i l l - o u t r o o m in t h e UDH.
june t 12 - 2pm. Table Tennis room, Union building. (R)
g Gliding at Lasham Airfield. (R)
s l p m . Table Tennis room.
n 3 - 5pm. Basketball, union gym. For details contact K a s h i f , aero II, k . a h m e d ( « a e . i c (R)
3
june
g
monday
2
June
may
(R)
S u n d a y
Summer l Can it really be that time already? Yes, it's only four weeks until the biggest end of term Carnival of the year. This year's Summer Carnival is on June 28th and promises to be 6 hours of total fun in the sun. For your pleasure there's going to be (take a deep breath...) four different rooms, with live music from Succulent who do a garagey vocal sort of thing, hard house from James Hockley, plus top Pulpy/Sleepery pop from the glamorous Showgirls. There's full-on Reggae in the gym, Chilling-out and cocktails courtesy of Malibu in the U D H , and the Poodle-
Chaos crew in the concert hall. They'll be bringing guest DJs, backdrops, a tarot reader, and the magnificent 7-colour laser is back as well. If you just fancy a cheesy boogie, the Pop Tarts will be taking over the Ents Lounge. Prop A r t will be supplying us with the best club decor throughout the building, so keep your eyes open for the three foot high bumble bees! There's going to be live music in the Quad, jugglers, a barbecue and a glass of Archers and lemonade to everyone who gets in! A l l that fun is yours for just £5 (or £4 with an entscard.) Tickets are on sale in the union: if there are any left (there weren't last year!) they'll be £ 6 on the door. Don't miss out on what promises to be a huge event.
f r i d a y
s 12.30pm. Beginners body toning (45 mins) 5.30pm. Beginners aerobics 6.30pm. Intermediate aerobics. (R) Southside G y m .
i 5 - 5.45pm. Southside Upper Lounge. (R)
5.15pm. Great Hall. Any ability. (R)
s 5.00pm. Circuit training. Union gym. (R)
C 7 - 9pm. Great Hall. come.
A l l wel(R)
6pm. Prince's Gardens Ecumenical Group. Chaplaincy Office, Northside. (R)
m o n d a y
ND0N3
e Museum Tuesday 4th June at l p m : D r John Gribbin presents a 45 minute lecture on his book
"Companion to the Cosmos: How to make a universe out of
e Bus service leaves f r o m in f r o n t of t h e u n i o n , t a k i n g lone f e m a l e students h o m e t o a n y w h e r e i n central L o n d o n . F i r s t r u n m i d night, last r u n 2 a m . See B e i t (R) Security for times.
Y
Urban Spice FOLD
COMMON PEOPLE INDIE NIGHT 9=3.
Clubs
d s
6
& Ota
nothing at all", and will be signing copies afterwards. Tickets are free, from Dillons in the Science Museum or phone 0171-938-8255.
l out room £ ^ ? R £ 6
You are rapidly running out of time to get your entry into the
1996
I C U Handbook. It's a
chance to get F R E E publicity to every Fresher, landing on their doormat before term starts next September. Write no more than 300 words detailing what sort of thing your club gets up to, preferably including a photograph and/or a society logo. Then get them to the Union office as soon as possible!
D
F
Y
Wednesday
thursday
4
5
6
june
june
12.00 pm. Ba'gritt Centre, Mechanical Engineering. (R)
C 12.15pm. Meet at Southside, go sailing. (R]
tuesday
t 12.30pm. Lecture theatre 2, Physics. (R) n 12.30 - 1.30pm. Room G02, Materials. All welcome. (R) C 12.45 - 1.45pm. Lounge.
Southside (R)
e 12.15pm. Southside Lounge. Contact Alex a.cinelli@ic.ac.uk, 0171 352 9111 (R) e 12.45pm. Southside Lounge. Contact Ian Robinson, i.robinson@ic. for more details. (R) a lpm Table Tennis room.
1.00pm. Brown Committee Room. Want to buy cheap CDs? Interested in borrowing highend Hi-Fi? We have it all! (R) o 1.00pm. meeting in Southside Lounge. (R) s 5 - 8pm. Ents Lounge. Contact sdh@ee.ic.ac.uk for details. (R) s 5.30pm. Advanced step aerobics. (R) C 6pm in the Clubs Committee Room. (R)
(R)
s 5 - 6pm. Southside Gym. Intermediate/ Advanced step class. (R) h 3.20 - 5.20pm. Sports centre. (R) C 7 - 10pm. Great Hall.
e 7pm. Beit Quad. All levels welcome, and free instruction. (R) s 8pm start. DaVinci's Bar Trivia, ÂŁ50 cash to be won! Dan the trivia man continues! Lots easier than your exams, and more likely to earn you instant cash!
t u e s d a y
IC
o
The Electronic Cafe Special. Tuesday, 9pm until midnight. Alick and Pete continue their run of big-name DJ's: this week Lee Grainge and Dave Brook (both of Fat Cat) will be playing 1 hour mixes of pure techno and Jungle. This is a show definitely not worth missing.
Dour l From 11th - 14th July in Belgium, just 80km from Brussels. This is one of Europe's best festivals with music, styles ranging from the groove of the last hip-hop and rap bands to the latest dance beats and indie sound. The line-up includes Iggy Pop, The Bluetones, Placebo, Frank Black, Madball, Terrorvision, Del Con Dos, The Brotherhood, Ministry, The Young Gods and Sugar Ray to name but a few. Tickets for the four days with camping cost ÂŁ35 and are available from London Calling Music, 22 Bardsley Lane, SE10 or phone 0181-293-9773.
lpm. Southside. http://www.su.ic.uk/clubs/societies(R) /scc/consoc/home.html g lpm. Meeting in Aeronautics 266. (R) A lpm Southside Lounge. "Take a walk on the wild side." (R) a 6.15 - 7.45pm. Table tennis room. Beginners' Kunalini class. mpn@doc.ic, ex 48237. (R) f 6.45pm in the Library. Meet up to go to the Ton.
lpm. Top floor of ICU.
g 5-7pm. Union Gym. Beginners welcome. 1st lesson free. (R) s 5.30pm. Advanced Step Aerobics. Southside Gym. (R) s 9pm-2am. Hedonizm - top clubby types of tunes and chill-out room.
f r i d a y
next diary deadline: noon, June 3 r d
C 8.15pm. Weeks Hall basement. Soup run for the homeless. (R) e Night skate - all welcome. Contact a.cinelli@ic.ac.uk for more details. (R) e 7.45pm meet in Southside. Rides in and around London. Any size and shape of bike welcome. Contact Ian Robinson, i.robinson@ic for more details. (R) s 8pm Casablanca it ain't... Very nice drinkies it certainly is. Cocktail Night. DaVinci's.
t h u r s d a y
d l Club
Mike Eustace came equal 3rd and Andy Eldridge came equal 5th in the West Kent Rifle League's Lewisham Cup. These were out of a field of 65 competitors.
(R)
g I. 10pm Ents Lounge. (R) n 3 - 5pm. Basketball, union gym. For details contact Kashif, aero (R) II, k.ahmed@ae.ic
g 7pm. Meeting in Southside. (R)
e
.
n e , n
W e d n e s d a y
1996
r
s 12.30pm. Southside Gym. Die Hard circuit training. 5.30pm. Beginners aerobics. (R)
(R)
know the score...
31
june
g 1.30 - 3.30pm. Union Gym. Beginners welcome. 1st lesson (R) free.
s 9-12.You Frolik!
M
june
n 6.30 - 7.45pm. W2 in Biology.
9.00pm. Union Bar. Further information from: pink-help@doc.ic.ac.uk or http://pink.doc.ic.ac.uk/IC/ (R)
F
friday
(R)
s 6.30pm. Brown Committee Room or Clubs Committee Room. (R)
X
. s e l s d y
FELI
FRIDAY MAY 31ST 1 9 9 6
LETTERS AND ELIMINATION
LETTERS TO FELIX E D I T E D BY T I M S T . C L A I R
o Dear Felix, Ah, the joys oi out-of-context quotes! In Rachel's editorial last week, I am quoted as saying that it would take major civil unrest for college to listen to student opinion. This is not true. I intended to say that student representation on the college examining committees is unlikely. Student opinion is considered, no, requested by all hoard of studies committees. These committees concern themselves with the quality of all academic courses at Imperial. The students who are asked about student opinion are the ICU president, C C U academic affairs officers and the f C U graduate affairs officer. Often these people are unable to consult a wider range of opinions before representing the student populace, but they try. Basically, student opinion is consulted on most academic matters.
often discuss individual students, f felt that the calculator issue should have been discussed on the undergraduate studies committee which has five student members. Perhaps a student presence on the management planning group would reduce student concerns that the college's need to raise revenue may detract from the needs of the students. But I fear that students are unlikely to be invited to join this group.
I am sure that student opinion is also requested in many other areas. The only glaring omissions as far as I can see is the lack of student presence on the examining committees and the college management planning group. It is not unreasonable that students are not on examining committees, as these committees
Yours, Matt Szyndel RCSUAAO
d Dear Felix, Obviously, IQ posters are in high demand with the trend conscious IC students. Eager students have snapped up copies around college. I must stess this is not necessary as personal copies can be easily obtained by contacting gaysoc@ic.ac.uk Yours sincerely,
a good story! If I were to play Simon at his own game, I'd say that he can't count and he can't read: there aren't as many as 12 people accommodated in the Admissions Office which he likened to the Wembley Arena and the admissions form he was asked to complete makes it clear right at the top that the application is being made to Imperial College.
Registrar but, on the strength of Simon's article, he's put in for a pay rise!
s
Dear Felix, Simon Baker writes: "Cambridge do have the upper hand in one respect. They've just banned mobile phones from all their libraries. Please take note." Simon is, of course, correct I am sure Mr Baker and about some things. Yes, the other sufferers would like to Registry did ask for references. know that, after discussion at the Departments usually require College Libraries Committee, it these because individual students is now Library Policy that mobile applying from inside the College phones should not be used in the may not be known to selectors College Libraries. This follows for a particular course. complaints from students and Furthermore all applicants are in staff about noisy conversations competition for places and need and ringing phones left unattendto be considered equally by selec- ed on desks. Notices will be posttors. Yes, I agree it does seem ed in libraries this week. daft that internal applicants are Yours sincerely, asked to provide details of ' A ' Richard Halls level results we already know. Sub-Librarian, The problem is a practical one of Reader Services capturing the information on the form without having to have even more people in the Admissions Office inserting it so that we'd need a room the size of Wembley Stadium instead of the Wembley Arena . We are, however, redesigning the form at the moment so we will see what can be achieved. 1
!Q President
-
1 e
Dear Rachel, I have always found Simon Baker's column an enjoyable read but like "Private Eye" he's not going to let facts get in the way of PS
Yours sincerely, F V McClure
s
Academic Registrar
. n Felix
Nigel Wheatley is not yet the
Elimination by Clansman
Bow Box Car Top Band Cart Lamp Pink Polo Room Seem Star Zero Blank
15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28.
Bough Board Cable Elbow Jelly Light Power Story Appear Babies Cheese Copper Pardon Spirit
y
29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41.
Silver Bedtime Clothes Curling Decimal Elastic Pierces Recipes Witness Absolute Shocking Automatic Hydraulic
a.
Holds those who saw
k.
Vehicle for telegrams?
b.
Two homonyms
1.
Two with pilot
c.
As cold as can be
m. A late tale!
d.
Two linked with horse
n.
Two anagrams
e.
Sweet youngsters?
o.
High-voltage colour?
f.
Two making sea term
p.
Two sports
g.
Ghost's light?
q.
Space for joints?
h.
Two elements
r.
Two with point
i.
Contracting holder
s.
A liquid force!
fant\ a go at w i n n i n g t h e ÂŁ2^ sports v o u c h e r o r a T-shirt, bring y o u r
j.
Two synonyms
t.
Two with big
vvonncsuQy {uit rttnj,
5. 6. 7 S. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14.
Due t o d distiiK t lack of response (and t h e fact that the s o l u t i o n and
i s s t K ' s o i tt'iix i\x( still
!ro;n tni*
EDITORIAL
FELI
FRIDAY M A Y 3 1 ST 1 9 9 6
!
FELIX
VACANCY
FOUNDED 1 9 4 9
PRODUCED FOR A N D O N BEHALF OF IMPERIAL COLLEGE U N I O N
ASSISTANT WARDEN
PUBLICATIONS BOARD PRINTED BY THE IMPERIAL COLLEGE U N I O N PRINT UNIT BEIT Q U A D
LONDON S W " 2 B B
PRINCE CONSORT ROAD TELEPHONE/FA
#
$ % &1
5 9 4 '()2
EDITOR: RACHEL WALTERS PRINTERS: A N D Y T H O M P S O N A N D JEREMY BUSINESS M A N A G E R : JULIETTE D E C O C K *
COPYRIGHT FELI 1 9 9 6 .
LINSTEAD HALL Applications are invited for the position of Assistant Warden of Linstead Hall, which is available from October 1996. Linstead Hall, in Princes' Gardens, is one of the liveliest halls of residence, it houses 192 students, primarily first year undergraduates. The Hall is run by a Warden, an Assistant Warden and two subwardenswhose responsibilities include managing a small bar and arranging evening meals.
Application forms and an information pack can be obtained from the Establishment Office, Personnel Division, Room 513, Sherfield Building, Tel. Ext. 45533 or 45532. Any non-undergraduate of the College may apply, but experience of pastoral care of students would be an advantage. Closing date for receipt of completed applications: Monday 17th June 1996.
ISSN
machinations
Which is all a long way of explaining why last week's To paraphrase a great office-wall Felixes had no staples in them. slogan of our times, to exhibit a In the meantime, various memspot of bad customer care is bers of college maintenance have human, but it takes a machine to spent sizeable amounts of time in thoroughly ruin your day. here. Remarkably, it appears to Felix is, as far as I know, the be fixed... but quite frankly I only student newspaper in the don't trust it. So apologies that country that publishes weekly. Felix is a little thin this week: I It's also the only one that prints figured 16,800 sheets was a little in house, which means that my more manageable. week doesn't finish when I have written a rather hurried editorial, all IC students but only when I have taken tens of thousands of bits of paper and end up at Kings fed them through a collating, stapling and folding machine. Whilst off at the King's Student At some point last Thursday Union on Tuesday for an end-ofevening the motor of said the-year London Sabbatical do, it machine developed an electrical was a bit of a shock to see so fault and ground to a halt. Had it many attractive females, and not been for the Islamic Society, rather alarming to discover quite we would have had no Felix. I so many Imperial students. reckon that it took approaching Could they be connected? 45 man hours to put 4200 copies It was particularly discontogether by hand (that's 21,000 certing to bump into my columbits of paper...] So seeing as we nist, and a bit of a revelation as didn't really get underway until well. Simon Baker may be witty, lam, I think it was rather an pithy and erudite, with a wellachievement. Thank you to all honed line of right wing rhetoric, who helped. but he can't dance for toffee.
EDITORIAL TEAM: FEATURES: M A R K BAKER SUB-EDITING A N D PROOFING: TIM ST CLAIR M U S I C : VIK BANSAL
CINEMA: W E I LEE
PHOTOGRAPHY: IVAN C H A N
EVERY THURSCIAY
PUZZLES: CATFISH
CLUBS A N D S O C S : STEPHEN HAMILTON
ARTS: JEREMY
SCIENCE: BEN WILKINS
COLLATING LAST WEEK: TIM, B E N , JEREMY, A N D Y A N D ISLAMSOC DELIVERING LAST WEEK: A N D R E W
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Breakfast h
only
available Saturday and Sunday 11:45am - 3:00pm Basics now open 11:45am - 10:00pm daily
Southside Shop 10%
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KODAK
Groceries l e d o e g r goods
ON-LINE
Kodak LIONHEART Printing Systems in the Ante Room Tuesday 4th to 7th June, 9am - 5pm. You are invited to send an d report via E Mail Kodak@IC.AC.UK) or g a disk to Kodak staff in the anteroom
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