Vol. 3 Issue 12 by The Runner

THE VOL. 03 ISSUE 12 01.26.2011 THE STUDENT LIFE ISSUE

A failing grade What’s Kwantlen’s grade vs. others /P. 03/

NEWS AND CULTURE FOR THE STUDENTS OF KWANTLEN POLYTECHNIC UNIVERSITY

NEWS & POLITICS

page two | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

SANITATION

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

AROUND KWANTLEN

Bedbugs found in UNB residence Incident adds to growing number of infestations across the country

HILARY PAIGE SMITH THE BRUNSWICKAN UNIVERSITY OF NEW BRUNSWICK

FREDRICTON (CUP) — Bedbugs have descended on another student residence, this time at the University of New Brunswick. A case of bedbugs has been discovered in the oldest student residence building on campus, and is in its final stages of treatment and extermination. Only one room has been affected by the infestation, though. James Brown, residence life executive director, said UNB has protocol in effect in case a residence is infected with the insects. “It’s not difficult to control if students report to us immediately that they suspect bedbugs either because they have seen them or because they have the small bites typical of bedbugs,” he said. “We inspect the room; have the student wash all clothing and bedding in hot water. We may encase the mattress in plastic and dispose of it. We move the student to another room and may provide a special liner for the new mattress,” Brown said. The room is then kept vacant and closed off while the

Brunswick Pest Management team steam cleans the room three times over the course of several weeks. Adjacent rooms are also inspected for bed bugs and are treated if necessary. A newly-approved chemical for combating infestations is also being used in New Brunswick. The chemical, known as Demand, is used in conjunction with steam cleaners. If the room is carpeted, the carpet may be removed, disposed of and replaced with tile flooring. Linda O’Brien, a residence assistant in the building, said the bugs were discovered shortly before students returned to campus after the holidays. O’Brien was impressed with how quickly the university responded to the infestation and ensured it did not spread to surrounding rooms. Cases of bed bugs at UNB are “not frequent” according to Brown and he said they average about one or two cases a year. O’Brien has been working in the residence building for a year and a half and said she has only seen two cases throughout her time there. In late 2010, cities in New Brunswick were plagued by bed bug infestations. In Saint John, a number of charities began

declining clothing donations for fear of the spread. A hospital was also hit by the outbreak. A residence building at Simon Fraser University in Burnaby, B.C. reported several cases of bedbugs in student rooms in September 2010. While all minor cases, the university acted quickly to ensure they didn’t spread to other rooms or buildings. The city of Toronto has declared a war on bedbugs, hosting the first-ever bedbug summit in September. The city received an estimated 1,500 infestation reports in 2009, up from just 46 in 2003. On Jan. 10, the Ontario government pledged $5 million to help public health units fight the pests. The government will also be increasing its public education tactics, ensuring Ontarians know how to prevent outbreaks. Bedbugs are also becoming a more common occurrence in Maritime households, with pest control companies receiving calls weekly. They are only small, about as large as an apple seed and brownish in colour. Bedbugs feed on blood and thrive in clutter. Infestations are widely discovered through the bites the bugs leave on their prey.

WHAT’S HAPPENING AT KWANTLEN

Jan

2011

Music at Midweek WHERE: Langley Campus WHEN: 12:15 p.m. WHAT: Music at Midweek presents the Kwantlen Brass Ensemble.

Jan

29 2011

KPU Student Leadership Conference WHERE: Surrey Campus Conference Centre WHEN: 9:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. WHAT: Get your skills on. Keynote speakers and seminars. Buy your tickets online @ kwantlen.ca

COMIC

Feb

Trades & Technology Awards Ceremony

WHERE: Cloverdale Campus

2011

WHEN: 5:30 p.m. - 8:00 p.m. WHAT: This ceremony recognizes outstanding student achievement in the trades and tech fields.

Feb

05 2011

Basketball Kwantlen Eagles vs. Quest Kermodes WHERE: Surrey Campus Gymnasium WHEN: Women’s @ 6:00 p.m. Men’s @ 8:00 p.m. WHAT: Come cheer for your home team!

CARLIE AUCLAIR/THE RUNNER

Feb

Open House

WHERE: Cloverdale Campus

2011

WHEN: 4:00 p.m. - 6:30 p.m. WHAT: Speak with faculty and tour the trades shops. More info @ 604 598 6103

PAM OLIVER/NEXUS (CAMOSUN COLLEGE)

NEWS & POLITICS

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page three

NATIONAL SURVEY

fail. I

ABBY WISEMEN CO-ORDINATING EDITOR

f you felt like Kwantlen didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t care about you, well turns out they do. In fact, they commissioned a statistics company called National Survey of Student Engagement to conduct a survey of how students felt about their experience at Kwantlen in their first year and their senior year. Below are the results based on five questions, which are considered benchmarks of student life: Level of academic challenge, active and collaborated learning, student-faculty interaction, enriching educational experiences and supportive campus environment.

Kwantlen is compared to three different sample groups: New Western: This is a group of five Universities, like Kwantlen, that have recently received university status in Western Canada. They are Capilano University, University of Fraser Valley, Vancouver Island University and Emily Carr University of Art + Design. Selected Peers: This group consists of 17 universities that were chosen by the school to be compared to. Some of the schools include Simon Fraser, University of New Brunswick, Trent University, University of Victoria, among others. NSSE 2010: This comparison is of all 586 schools across Canada that NSSE has surveyed. What youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking at: It seems that as students move up in their education, their experience moves up with them. Senior students gave higher marks for the school in all categories but one, the supportive educational environment category. In total, Kwantlen scored lower than the top 50 per cent of Canadian universities in all categories with first years. These are universities that according to NSSE, scored over 50 per cent in student life across Canada. In the senior years, Kwantlen made it into the top 50 per cent in two categories: level of academic challenge and active and collaborative learning. Kwantlen didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make it into the top 10 per cent in any category.

Legend:

First Year

Seniors

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STUDENT-FACULTY INTERACTION

ACTIVE AND COLLABORATIVE LEARNING

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ENRICHING EDUCATIONAL EXPERIENCES

LEVEL OF ACADEMIC CHALLENGE

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SUPPORTIVE CAMPUS ENVIRONMENT

) &' %#

! ' %&

page four | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

NEWS & POLITICS

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

YOUR MONEY

KSA student fees getting a hike This semester Kwantlen students will be paying a little more in student fees than previously.

MATTHEW BOSSONS TRAVEL BUREAU CHIEF

Students and some Kwantlen Student Association members are grumbling about the new fees and several increases imposed by the KSA. Approved in last years referendum, some students, like fashion student Natalie Reid were not aware of the changes. “I’m there everyday, and get their emails everyday, and I haven’t heard anything about it. Since the majority of students pay for their own school, the fact that they can’t even make it known to all students is really disappointing,” says Natalie Reid, 20, a Fashion Marketing student. “And not to mention a lot more stressful since I pay for my own school.” Some KSA members are unhappy with the increase in fees,

and feel it is the wrong solution to a series of efficiency problems afflicting the KSA. Through email correspondence with The Runner, Shanal Prasad, current KSA Director of Finance, writes, “Members of the KSA, not myself, believe more money is needed to grow current programs and to start new programs. I disagree strongly on this point, as I feel the current KSA programs are weak, not properly developed, and throwing money at the problem isn’t going to fix anything. I’ve been a harsh critic on this and am very frustrated Council passed through the fee increases. My stance has been to reduce fees if anything; the KSA is very poor at making effective use of funds.” No plans have been made on how to spend the increased revenue

Open Admission and Selective Entry Course fees will increase as follows: ∏ Lobby Fund: Was $0.22 now $0.29 per credit. ∏ SUB Capital Fund: Was $0.30 now $0.95 per credit. ∏ START Volunteer Program: Was $0.20 now $0.37 per credit. ∏ Reboot Computer Service: Was $0.20 now $0.30 per credit. ∏ Student Association Extended Health Plan: Was $93 now $97 per year. ∏ Student Association Dental Plan: Was $86 now $90 per year. ∏ Intramurals: Was $0.21 now $0.25 per credit. New Fees: ∏ Peer Counseling: $0.15 per credit. ∏ Advocacy Service:$0.10 per credit. ∏ The Social Justice Fee: $0.15 per credit.

Similar charges will affect students in Fixed Term Programs and Fulltime Continuous Intake Programs: ∏ Lobby Fund: Was $0.20 now $0.27 per credit. ∏ SUB Capital Fund: Was $0.28 now $0.86 per credit. ∏ START Volunteer Program: Was $0.18 now $0.35 per credit. ∏ Reboot Computer Service: Was $0.18 now $0.27 per credit. ∏ Intramurals: Was $0.19 now $0.23 per credit. ∏ Student Association Extended Health Plan: Was $93 now $97 per year. ∏ Student Association Dental Plan: Was $86.00 now $90.00. New Fees: ∏ Peer Counseling: $0.14 per credit. -Social Justice Fee: $0.14 per credit. ∏ Advocacy Service: $0.09 per credit.

A JOB IN BRIEF

Provincial politics heats up a Kwantlen gears up for Elections

Woman Freezes to Death

The BC Liberal and NDP leadership races are heating up as candidates jockey with each other on issues such as the HST, social media and the ruralurban divide. The Liberals will elect their new leader on Feb. 26th, who will go on to become BC’s Premier, while the NDP are electing their new leader April 17. Kwantlen students will be preparing for a different set of polls as KSA elections are held Jan 31- Feb 6.

Scarborough, On. A 66-year old woman died Monday Jan 17th after wandering off into the cold in the early hours of the morning. Judy Tak Fong Lam Chiu suffered from dementia, and left her home as temperatures dipped below -20C. Her cries for help went unheeded. The unfortunate death has lead to renewed dialogue on how to properly care for the approximately 500,000 Canadians estimated to suffer from dementia.

City of Vancouver to celebrate 125th birthday

US reignites battle over softwood lumber

The City of Vancouver announced two events to mark its 125th anniversary. On April 6th, the city will hold what its calling a “Birthday Event” to mark the incorporation of the city of Vancouver, with live music, visual art and childhren’s activities. The federal government has also declared Vancouver to be cultural capital for 2011, and will help fund other projects such as public art programs, a poetry conference and a “Vancouver 125 Legacy Books Project”.

The US accused Canada of violating the 2006 Softwood Lumber Accord on Tuesday, Jan. 18. The US is concerned that timber harvested from BC’s interior is being sold at prices below those agreed to in the pact. Under the terms of the deal, either party can ask for binding arbitration to resolve disagreements.

www.runnerrag.ca www.twitter.com/runnerrag www.twitter.com/groatinthesack www.facebook.com/runnerpaper

A lesson on following your dreams I

CHRIS YEE CONTRIBUTOR

If you’ve done any sort of career planning, you’ll probably know about the information interview. The process goes somewhat like this: make some contacts in the career you’re thinking of, draw up some questions about it, then go out and schedule an interview with your career contacts to ask those questions. Having done so, you now have some kind of perspective on your prospective career. Simple, right? One man decided to do much more than that. In 2007, Sean Aiken, a business management graduate from Capilano College, then 25, was still trying to figure out what to do for a career. Instead of blindly leaping into the first job he could find, he devised a plan, the “One Week Job Project”: spend a year working at various jobs, one job a week. He’d donate any money he made in the week to charity, he write a blog and post YouTube videos about his experience. These postings, plus footage shot by producer and lifelong friend Ian MacKenzie would become the raw materials for the documentary “One Week Job”,

screened last Thursday as part of Career Week at Kwantlen. One Week Job follows Aiken’s travels across Canada and the US, working at various jobs in various places. He starts out on his journey as a bungee operator in Whistler and ends as mayor of his hometown, Port Moody. In between, his jobs were diverse indeed – in Toronto alone, for instance, he worked as a tattoo parlour assistant and a brewmaster, as well as raising funds for cancer research and doing media work for the Toronto Film Festival. As publicity mounted, Aiken got job offers in the US, too. At the end of the exercise, Aiken had determined that, out of all the jobs experienced, he would most like to be a realtor, a motivational speaker or a teacher. As the documentary progresses, Aiken imparts lessons of the experiences he had and the people he met: from the importance of passion and the sense of contributing to something bigger than oneself, to the realities of constant change and, sometimes, deep disappointments. Aiken deals not only with his jobs and his travel arrangements but also with increasing media attention (and its pros and

cons), long-distance relationships, and family emergencies. Aiken’s mother was diagn sed with breast cancer, leading him to question his commitment to the project.At the urging of his father, however, Aiken continued on to finish the year’s worth of jobs. In the end, One Week Job has become a career in itself for Aiken. In addition to his posts and the documentary, he has written a book on his experiences, and is now touring schools and campuses, raising funds for a nationwide student work program based on his journey. One Week Job has been dubbed as the start of a “movement” and “a rallying cry for a generation,” but it is also a priceless lesson in finding direction, whether it is in one’s career or life in general. While we need not go on a cross-country trip to find out what we want, it is important to be open to opportunities and be willing to explore all options- and pursue them with passion!

More on the One Week Job Project: www.oneweekjob.com/ www.refresheverything.ca oneweekjobproject - “create a national student work program.”

We love hearing from you... THE

EDITORIAL

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page ﬁve

PIPELINE

Supply and demand in northern British Columbia

The Runner is student owned and operated by Kwantlen Polytechnic University students, published under Polytechnic Ink Publishing Society.

New pipeline held back by environmental economics — for now

Vol. 3, Issue no. 12 January 26, 2011 ISSN# 1916-8241

#205-12877 76 Ave. Surrey, B.C. V3W 1E6 www.runnerrag.ca 778-565-3801

EDITORIAL DIVISION: Co-ordinating Editor Abby Wiseman editor@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3803 Culture Editor Kristi Alexandra culture@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3804 News Editor Kassandra Linklater news@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3805 Production Editor Cat Yelizarov production@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3806 Media Editor Matt Law media@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3806

BUREAU CHIEFS: Arts & Design / Antonio Su Creative Writing / Jared Vaillancourt Current Events / Mae Velasco Entertainment / Hayley Woodin Environmental / (Vacant) Health / Carlie Auclair Lifestyle / Jeff Groat Politics / Paul Li Sports / Kyle Benning Student Affairs / (Vacant) Travel / Matthew Bossons

WINNIPEG (CUP) — What would you say if a company with an arguably poor environmental track record asked for a pipeline to pump some of the most environmentally damaging oil on the planet through your pristine backyard so that oil could then be loaded onto arguably unsafe tankers in waters generally understood to be treacherous at best? You’d probably tell them to fuck off, fast. This is precisely what half a dozen environmental organizations, 61 First Nations and a handful of municipalities directly affected by Enbridge Inc.’s proposed 1,170 kilometre “Northern Gateway” pipeline in northern British Columbia have said, and in no uncertain terms. Yet, despite the opposition to the pipeline itself, and formidable opposition on the part of four out of five British Columbians to even allowing oil tankers in coastal waters, our federal government is backing the plan. The Northern Gateway pipeline would pump crude from northern Alberta’s tar sands operations to Kitimat, B.C. From there, tankers would navigate notoriously dangerous waters into the Pacific, and then on to China. Currently an unofficial moratorium exists on tankers in coastal waters, as many residents remember all too well the Exxon-Valdez spill in Alaska. Stephen Harper, for his part, has let it be known that that key word in “unofficial moratorium” is “unofficial.” Sixty-one First Nations from the Fraser River watershed in northern interior B.C. have voiced their staunch opposition to the project, as they fear that spills or leaks from the pipeline would

CONTRIBUTORS: Catherine Thompson, Chris Yee, Todd Easterbrook, Lucas Meneses-Skoda, Josh Saggau, Rick Kumar

SHELDON BIRNIE THE MANITOBAN

LEANNE ROED/THE MANITOBAN

irreparably damage salmon runs and negatively impact their Aboriginal rights in the area. As many, if not all, of these First Nations are still without treaty agreements with Canada, Aboriginal title to the land remains with the First Nations. Regardless, the Crown owes First Nations a duty to consult prior to moving forward with any development that might impact that title. Nine First Nations on the west coast declared an outright ban on oil tankers in their traditional territory earlier this year — a move that was backed up shortly thereafter by the Union of B.C. Indian Chiefs, who ratified a resolution against Enbridge’s pipeline pipedream. Despite all of this, Enbridge’s website for the Northern Gateway project still maintains that they are “working co-operatively with Aboriginal communities to ensure they have the

opportunity to meaningfully benefit from the project over the long term.” The federal government is clearly standing on this side of the fence, as well — which isn’t surprising. A company hoping to sell its product is going to put on the best front possible, even if it’s farcical. Our federal government’s position on environmental issues is much the same — almost entirely void of meaningful substance while promoting the economy above, as opposed to a part of, the environment. In the oil game, the only thing that matters is cold, hard cash — much like real life. As far back as the 1920s, Upton Sinclair had nailed the game in his creative non-fiction novel Oil! However, while Sinclair’s novel offers some hope for those interested in social justice, I doubt ol’ Upton ever fathomed a beast as ghastly as the Alberta tar sands, nor the multinational backing such a

beast would enjoy in the age of globalized Earth-rape. As big a beast as the apocalyptic machinery in Fort McMurray, Alta. and its far reaching tentacles may be, it is still beholden to the tried and true laws of capitalism — supply and demand. Currently, other oil players are calling Enbridge’s hand. According to Kinder Morgan — another major pipeline company — the proposal is seriously flawed. A lawyer for Kinder Morgan claims that Enbridge is not meeting the requirements set out by the National Energy Board, and that Enbridge is punching above its weight. Apparently, Enbridge has no proven clients for the pipeline and that the pipeline as proposed would create an overcapacity for its services — in effect over-supplying the market. And still, our prime minister is backing the plan. The Harper government has always been buddy-buddy with the oil industry — check the rhetoric coming from his office and from the new environment minister Peter Kent if there’s any doubt in your mind — so this comes as no surprise. Playing the U.S. demand for oil off the Chinese, however, is an interesting strategy for the prime minister — but will it pay off? That’s hard to say, given the current opposition to the project and the potential legalities involved with opposing First Nations. What is for sure, as always, is that money talks and bullshit walks. If the proposal passes the Joint Panel Review, which the long-debated Mackenzie Valley Pipeline recently did despite much Aboriginal and local opposition, and Enbridge can sell their crude to the Chinese, we’ll be sure to see plenty of shovels in the ground between Edmonton and Kitimat before long.

CAMPUS LIFE

And the survey says: Kwantlen is not making the grade

Cover Art / Cat Yelizarov, Matt Law

BUSINESS DIVISION: Operations Manager, Ads, Classifieds DJ Lam ops@runnerrag.ca 778-688-3797 Office Co-ordinator Victoria Almond office@runnerrag.ca 778-565-3802 Operations Assistant Brittany Tiplady

Kwantlen made a big gesture by surveying students to find out what they think about student life at the school, but in the end it is up to the students to get involved and create the school they want.

ABBY WISEMAN CO-ORDINATING EDITOR

Sitting in on Jody Gordon’s, vice president of student affairs, presentation of the results of National Survey of Student Engagement made me think two things: “this is nice that the school is showing that they care about students,” and “didn’t they already know this?” I wasn’t surprised at any of the less than stellar marks, but I figured that this could be

gauged by cafeteria chats with students on a lunch break and didn’t require a huge amount of analysis. This is not to say I’m criticising the intention of the school to find out where students are at in term of life on campus. In fact I applaud them for taking that step. I just wonder how out of touch are they? The survey did bring up an interesting point: as people progress in their education, their involvement and satisfaction

grows with them. It seems that getting first-year students to be involved in school life is harder than senior students. I’ve been going to this school on and off, since 2004 and, to be honest, I was one of the many who came to school, slept through class and then went back home. It wasn’t until I got involved in the journalism program, and really not until the end of last Spring semester, that I truly got involved in student life.

The thing I’ve realized is that there are a lot of things to do at Kwantlen. It may not be like UBC with it’s pubs, or Emily Carr with it’s endless art exhibitions, but your experience at Kwantlen is really what you make of it. The school can conduct as many surveys as they want, but unless you, the students, decide that they want to be a part of student life here, it’s just nice graphs on a piece of paper.

ENVIRONMENT

page six | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

GREEN WEDNESDAY

Paint the town green on Green Wednesdays

CATHERINE THOMPSON CONTRIBUTOR

If you think environmentally-conscious get-togethers involve incense burning, organic hors d’ouerves and tree-hugging, then you have yet to attend one of Kwantlen’s Green Wednesdays. The event, held the second Wednesday of every month at Langley campus, features an eco-themed movie which is then followed up by yummy treats and sometimes a discussion. Hosted at Langley campus at 7:00 p.m., with doors opening at 6:30 p.m., Green Wednesdays are free but donations are encouraged to offset the cost of the delicious baked goods. “[Green Wednesdays] was born out of a pilot I ran some time ago called The Environment Around Us, a short series of three public lectures here at Langley,” says Gary Jones, regarding the event’s beginnings. “Around that same time I was approached by the Green Ideas

Network who had been running environmental themed movies in Surrey, but was looking for a new venue in Langley area. Hey, presto; Green Wednesdays were born and we started the idea of informal movie nights for the public, and a couple of sponsors got on board.” Admittedly, I am a Green Wednesdays fan girl and, with bated breath, I eagerly await each event as a chance to get informed and rub shoulders with the environmentally enlightened. If you’re not a horticulture, geography, or environmental studies student, or you aren’t one to passionately pursue pottery or lust after logistics in your spare time, that’s fine, you are still welcome to join the group. Especially if you think a hoe is something other than a gardening tool, and you don’t fear mockery or scornful disapproval,

The Runner’s own Environmental Bureau Chief, Catherine Thompson, recently stopped by Langley campus to check out Green Wednesday’s. She quickly realized what all the excitment was about.

then you should definitely come out and learn a thing or two. Gary Jones, Green Wednesdays’ coordinator, welcomes all, noting that, “events are open to everyone, not just students.” And even if you’re more of the volunteering type, or if Green Wednesdays conflicts with that Biochem class, you can still lend a hand by putting up posters around campus, or by setting up the room beforehand. Jones says that there are many benefits of attending Green

Wednesdays: “[Learning] about environmental issues, [connecting] with like-minded others and [being] part of the wider community.” His final remark being most tempting to any student on a shoe string-budget is, “Win great door prizes! Have a free night out in a nice warm room, watching great movies.” And as for Jones’ favorite Green Wednesday so far, “Always the next one…” The upcoming Green Wednesday is Feb. 9, with “Chemercial.” Come for the environmental education, snacks and good company or, at very least, to demolish any stereotypes of eco-friendly gatherings. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. and donations are appreciated for the yummy food. It’s not all about Birkenstocks and bean sprouts, my friend.

OPINION

Movies gone supernatural: crazy I SLEDGE PAJANCONI

What if there’s more to it? What if there really is more than meets the eye? Or maybe. Just maybe. I just dig down too deep. But what if it turns out to be something, really? What will we miss anyway? But let’s back up a bit, shall we. I love multi-media. It keeps us occupied when we feel too lazy to get occupied. It makes life easy and complicated at the same time. It makes people look cool and ‘in’, even if they really aren’t sometimes. And, of course, it offers a sweet escape to a wonderland far far away from exams, homework, projects....uhmm...we don’t really need to mention them all, do we? But hey, I’m drifting away here. I just want to talk about

movies. Something about the movies intrigues me these days. Have you noticed the Hollywood flics lately? I don’t about you but I’ve sort of observed how they’ve jacked up a gear higher on stories heavy with supernatural or spiritual themes. It’s bizarre and surreal. What’s up with these werewolves and zombies, and pre-destination stuff? What’s up with these dragons, and elves, and orcs, and the end of the world prophecy agendas? What’s up with these vampire love, and life after death, with witchcraft, and casting spells, and talking to spooky spirits? What’s up with Christian crosses and Eygptian symbols dangling around their necks? What’s up with this conflict between good and evil, and ‘a world beyond own’

gigs? What’s up with making pacts with the devil, and battles of fallen angels, of heaven and hell, and blaspheming God, and burning Bibles? What’s up with all that? Well,we may argue that it’s not a big deal and it’s all just entertainment. But why this sudden surge of the dark themes in almost half of the major motion pictures? Could they be up tp soemthing here? An ancient book, which by the way, is curiously well quoted and mocked all over movietown, reads ‘for we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness in this world, against spiritual wickedness in the heavenly places.’ Pheew... Sounds nasty to me. Could we somehow relate this stuff?

A bus ad I saw a couple days ago reads, ‘behind the pretty pictures---truth still matters’. So it seemed funny to remember some old wise guy in a Star Wars novel say that every myth is always based on a single seed of truth. Movies hold an enormous influence on the human mind, no doubt. It can drag us down to unimaginable emotional depths, or hoist us up to unthinkable heights. It can make us cringe, it can kick our sexual drives, it can tickle dormant senses, make us laugh like mad men, scream like we mean it, freeze us on the edge of our seats, and tug our heartstrings. Ironically, it can also send us a message. Whether subliminally, like music, or right up in front, it almost, always never fails to deliver.

Consider this little hypothesis. What not ask; what’s up with this story? A good versus bad. Hero against villain. Angels and demons. God against the Devil. Love versus hatred. Peace versus revenge. Sometime around five minutes in our movie experience, our brain shifts from right-sided thinking, to the left-sided thinking. From logical to emotional. From intelligent to hypnotized. But wait...it’s almost certain we would have to choose sides then. We’d hang on to the character we’re supposed to like. But which side is our hero on, really? What’s he or she telling you is right or wrong to do? But does it matter, really? It’s just for good’ol entertainment fun, right? But hang on. What if it does?

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

FEATURE

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2010 | page seven

ELECTION

KSA ELECTION: WHO YOU CAN VOTE FOR

MEET THE CANDIDATES, THEY WANT YOUR VOTE.

There are five executive positions up for grabs: director of Finance, director of academic affairs, director of external affairs, director of events and director of operations. We at the Runner tried our best to give equal opportunity to all of the candidates running for executive positions, but like all newspapers we are on deadline. Unfortunately, we weren’t able to contact some ofthe candidates in time and others refused our requests. However, we encourage you to get out there and talk to these people, they want to make your time at Kwantlen more enjoyable and maybe more fun. Remember, they take money from you every semester. So vote. It’s your choice. It’s your student life. It’s your money. Elections are: Jan 31 - to Feb 6th online

FEATURE

page eight | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

ELECTION

GET TO KNOW Director of Finance Kan Wu BBA in Accounting

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WHILE IN OFFICE?

First of all, I would like to at least stop the fees from increasing, and I cannot decrease the fees without a referendum. And of course, by decreasing, I will have to first get 250 signatures. Even though I think they should be decreased, not everybody in the student body does. Other than that, I also want to hold up ethics in a high standard, because right now there are rumours, and I don’t need to say that out loud what those are, that the KSA is corrupt and I would like to change that, and if I cannot change that by myself, I will at least hold myself with the highest ethical standard. WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?

I think it’s kind of obvious where they’re spending their funding: it’s mostly free food, free concert events and that’s not really bringing the students together. And although I’m doing finance ...if I see an event that’s really good, I will not only provide support but funding too to help those events. Right now, I think there are some really good events, like the Leadership Conference and Career Day. These kind of things really bring students together. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

Right now, that entirely depends on the student body. [For example] I understand that it’s going to cost us $40 [for the U-Pass] a month, and if you enroll for three semesters in a row, then you will have to have $500 per year basically. I know that’s really high, and I also know that in the contract it says that there’s other gym memberships and stuff that’s included in there. But I think that right now, what students need the most is the U-Pass by itself so I think the contract should be renegotiated.

Director of External Affairs Matt DiMera BA in Journalism

Director of External Affairs Ashley Fehr BA in Political Science

Director of Operations Matt Todd Associates of Art

WHY WOULD YOU BE GOOD?

WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?

WHY WOULD YOU BE GOOD:

I would concentrate more on developing better relationships with other schools, other student associations, basically working together on common issues like reducing interest on student loans, and basically just trying to reduce other student fees in general. Students pay way too many fees as it is, and most students are poor or working or struggling to pay for tuition, and any reduction, anything we can do to try and reduce that burden, is what I’m trying to work for.

I wouldn’t necessarily change anything, I would just take a different focus than what’s’ been taken last year. So a stronger focus on lobbying and more interaction with the liaisons to work on social justice kind of lobbying. I know there is a lot issues that have been had with international students being put aside so I would like to work closer with liaisons.

What I’m interested in is the student union building and some of the changes in how the KSA functions. So I’m most interested in developing a strategic plan and insuring that we have the management and the system set up in such a way so that we can actually develop on that strategic plan. It is supposed to be required in our bylaw that we have a strategic plan, but we don’t have one.

A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

Kwantlen is a unique situation because we don’t have residences, which means student life is harder to generate, especially since we’ve traditionally been a commuter campus. But I know the school is working on trying to develop student life. I hope that the KSA, in concert with the university, can start to try and address these things through better events, through stronger support for student clubs [and] more campus space for students to study [and] socialize. One of the KSA’s goals, that if I’m elected I hope to work on, is negotiating the student union building on campus in Surrey.

A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

I think the KSA could work closely with the school to help improve student life, and we are already working closely with them. I think it’s a sad fact, but I think it means we just have a mandate to do better. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

I think they’re on their way too. The reason fees are so high is because there is a lot of new programs that haven’t been implemented yet, so in the coming year they will all be very well implemented. HOW WOULD YOU DEFEND YOURSELF WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT YOU’VE STALLED COUNCIL FOR PERSONAL REASONS OVER THE LAST SEMESTER?

I would say that I showed up to every council meeting that was set. So I couldn’t have council, I was there at every meeting at every meeting trying to move forward, with soutions for compromises. but other members didn’t accept those compromises.

A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

I’ve known about these stats for a long time and we’ve already started working on addressing them. So sometimes it’s hard to answer a question as though I’ve first heard them right. I think that most students would not be surprised and I think it’s a huge challenge that the KSA needs to take a leadership role in addressing. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

Yes. HOW WOULD YOU DEFEND YOURSELF WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT YOU’VE STALLED COUNCIL FOR PERSONAL REASONS OVER THE LAST SEMESTER?

I was not a member that was boycotting meetings, I attended all meetings whether I was happy about who was on the agenda or who was in the room or not. I think that whether I like the people that I work with is irrevelevant to me trying to get the job done.

FEATURE

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2010 | page nine

ELECTION

YOUR CANDIDATES Director of Events Doug Hinshe BA in History

Director of Events Reena Bali BBA in Human Resources

Director of Events Davinder Chohan BA in History

Director of Events Shanal Prasad BBA in Finance

WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?

WHY WOULD YOU BE GOOD?

I think that there’s a lot of opportunity at Kwantlen. This past year year it seems like it’s been really distant at Kwantlen for students, and I want to make more of a university feel, like a classic movie almost, but obviously you’re not going to have a Van Wilder situation, but I just think that there’s a lot of opportunity at Kwantlen, especially with the four different campuses, we’re able to do a lot more things than we do. And I’d just really like to have students meeting students. I’ve been here for four years now and I really don’t have any friends to know about, and I just think that there’s a lot of opportunity to change that.

I am running for director of events. What I want to do, is bring a little more of what I started this past term. More student life through pub nights, and club nights, and career related events. Community focused events, as well as bigger and better free food events.

Right now at school, I don’t see any school spirit going around. [I] just want to make more events for the school and have people more aware of what’s going on in our school’s atmosphere. And get a little more school spirit around everywhere. It’s been about three years since I’ve been at Kwantlen, and I rarely hear about events going on. If there are events, sometimes they fall short towards the end. I really want to get more student involvement and get the school spirit upbeat

I would like to see more events dedicated to development training. For example, more focus on conferences, workshops, seminars; things that give students the opportunity to learn and develop. Because right now the focus is more on events that are supposed to be fun, but all that ends up happening is free food is given away and nothing really happens. I think it’s a waste of money. We should be trying to fill gaps, and get an education and try to get them ready for the working world.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE U-PASS REFERENDUM?

A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

That doesn’t surprise me at all. Coming back to the first thing, there’s not really opportunities to do anything, I mean we have one really big event a year and even that event, I went to the last one and it kind of didn’t really seem that great. I sound like a broken record but it’s full of opportunity to change that so it’s definitely something that would be on my agenda, like the first thing on my agenda is to change that. Definitely raise the bar. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

No, they’re definitely not.

A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

It’s relatively hard [to be in the top 50% for universities of Canada] as we don’t have any residents on campus. So we have a different factor to face, compared to other universities and colleges across our country. But hopefully with more sort of pub nights or theme events, we can fix that. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

I think they do if they get involved. HOW WOULD YOU DEFEND YOURSELF WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT YOU’VE STALLED COUNCIL FOR PERSONAL REASONS OVER THE LAST SEMESTER?

I would say there’s more to the story than that. It was more of a boycott for a political reason, and it was used because members…. Well I can say for myself that it didn’t feel like we were heard out.

According to what I’ve been reading, I think they gave an okay on a $45 U-Pass. Is that correct? But what we were promised from the government was that there would be a universal one, which would’ve been a lot cheaper. Sure the referendum is good in a sense that Kwantlen students would be getting a U-Pass, but there is a negative aspect that we are paying a lot more in tuition. So the referendum is going to get the student’s opinion, but in the last couple referendums that the school has had, not many people have come out and voted. So with this referendum, hopefully a part of my campaign will get the students more aware of what the referendums are actually about, and how much more they are going to be paying, and hopefully that will result in more students coming out and more people aware of the situation.

Well campus isn’t really open that long. We’re open until about 10 or 11 on Sundays in the library. There is no where to stay and hang out, or there is nothing to do, or they don’t live around here, so why would they stay on campus? Other universities, like UBC for example, have their own village. I really think that in order to hear the student life, we need to have a student union building first. I think that would greatly contribute to student life. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

No, I don’t think students are getting much value. In terms of student fees that they are paying, I really don’t think that students get value. It all depends on how much you actually use. For example, if you are a volunteer, if you are getting your computer fixed, then you might get some value, but overall I think our student body basically will never see that money back.

page ten | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

FEATURE

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

ELECTION

Director of Academic Affairs Christopher Girodat Associates of Political Science

WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE:

First, I would make education more accessible through reducing fees instead of spending money on pizza. I think if most students had to choose between a slice of pizza in C building or being able to take that fourth class that they can’t afford, they’re going to choose the second option. A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

I think the problem of student life at Kwantlen is community engagement; students know we’re a stepping stone school, not a destination school. That’s why we need an advocate on KSA Council and the Executive Board to work with the Senate and push for more degrees and programs so we can change into a one-stop university. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

No. That comes back to making education accessible by reducing fees where we don’t need them; for example, $3,000 on pizza.

Director of Academic Affairs Nicole Joe BBA in Human Resources

WHY WOULD YOU BE GOOD FOR THIS POSITION?

I am currently running for the director academic of current affairs. The current director has done really well, but I want to change on some stuff right now that he probably hasn’t touched on yet. I know that the library has extended their hours, which has extended the school hours a bit. But I’ve noticed during exam period the school isn’t open long enough for students. One of the things I want to go for is keeping the school open 24/7 during exams periods, if not at least a little bit longer on regular days, just like UBC and SFU do. A RECENT STUDY SHOWED KWANTEN’S STUDENT LIFE IN THE BOTTOM 50% OF UNIVERSITIES ACROSS CANADA. THOUGHTS?

Did not reply in time for press: Director of Operations Justine Franson n/a

Director of Operations Jamil Narsawi n/a

Director of External Affairs Bobby Padda n/a

Director of Finance Sharif Ali n/a

Director of Academic Affairs Jaspinder Ghuman n/a

Director of Events Tarun Takhar n/a

First thought it is ‘wow’ because I didn’t think that. Personally, I’d be pretty surprised that we’re at the bottom. I think right now Kwantlen is in the change from a university college to a university. So right now they’re trying ease into it a little bit more. DO YOU THINK KWANTLEN STUDENTS GET THEIR MONEY’S WORTH?

I believe that students are getting what they’re paying for, I think also it’s up to students to taking advantage of what they’re paying for. I mean, for events or for any campaigns or advocacies, I believe they should be going to these events because they are for students. And I also think that has something to do with student life, because it’s not high school, you don’t just go to school just to study. You should be able to enjoy student life as well, so I believe they should be able to take advantage of that.

Declined request for interview: Director of Finance Robert Mena n/a

Director of Finance Nina Sandhu n/a

SPORTS

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page eleven

MEN’S BASKETBALL

Eagles go

0-3 in Winter Classic, but learn lesson

Head coach Love says team needs to work on outside shooting. He will sleep well at night now. Just had to say that. I LUCAS MENESES-SKODA

Although Kwantlen’s men’s basketball team came away without a victory in the Winter Classic exhibition tournament, the team showed a lot of grit and determination. To head coach Bernie Love, that is something to be proud of coming off of two losses against strong out-of-province teams. “We controlled the tempo in both games for the most part, which is what we need to do,” said Love after the Eagles fell to their second loss in tournament play on Jan. 7 against the Lakeland College Rustlers, a highpowered offensive team from Lloydminster, Alberta, who sit at 9-1 in the Alberta Colleges Athletic Conference. “Its one of those losses where as a coach, you know… I’ll sleep tonight. We played really, really hard. I’m really, really proud of them.” The Eagles trailed the Rustlers through majority of the game, and fell short in a 80-67 loss. The team had to play come-from-behind ball until the

last buzzer. Allowing the Rustlers to be victorious by only 13 points was a feat in itself, as they easily handled the competition by putting up more than 90 points in each of their previous two contests, and by outscoring their opponents for a combined 60 points. “We had some really good looks, the ball just wasn’t going in. Defensively though… I’m really, really pleased where we are. [We] still make a few mistakes here and there, but we are really grinding it out. That’s what we are going to need to win,” said Love. Another strong underlying success that came out of the Eagles’ tournament was how they were scoring. The majority of their points were put up by forwards. With Doug Meyers, a key player and leader of the team, sitting out in the game against Lakeland College due to tweaking his knee in the previous game, forward Ali Bosir, also named a men’s all-star in the Winter Classic, pulled out a

Kwantlen Eagles forward Didar Grewal plays tough defense to try and keep his team in the game against Northwest Indian College in the men’s first game of the Kwantlen Winter Classic. KYLE BENNING/THE RUNNER

huge game with 23 points. Following him, forward Mark Dabrowski had 17 points, and Harpreet Randhawa had 13 points. In their first loss, where they fell to the Northwest Indian College Eagles, the story was quite similar. Kwantlen’s energy level was low, trailing for 30 minutes, until in the last quarter, forward Mark Dabrowski caught on fire with 13 points in the final ten minutes to bring his total to 15 in the game. Again, the points came from in the paint as Bosir followed up with 14 points and Randhawa with 9 points. After the fact, coach Love acknowledged his team’s lack of production from the outside, but is optimistic that if that can change, so can their losing ways. “We don’t shoot the ball well from the perimeter, I mean that’s just the reality, we don’t. So we’ve just got to start insideout. Somewhere along the line if we can start knocking down some outside shots, we are going to be very tough,” said Love.

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL

Women perform well in Winter Classic tournament despite missing top scorer I JOSH SAGGAU

Oxana Senyuk drives the lane to put away two points in the Eagles win over the Columbia Bible College Bearcats in Kwantlen’s Winter Classic. Senyuk was named as one of the torunaments all-stars. KYLE BENNING/THE RUNNER

After finishing the 2011 Kwantlen Winter Classic with a 1-2 record, the women’s basketball team was pleased with their weekend performance. “I was pretty happy with [our performance]. Our focus was on our energy and playing hard for 40 minutes and I think we did that,” said head coach Matt McKay. While the Eagles didn’t dominate the weekend tournament, coach McKay was pleased with the team’s effort. They kept every game competitive, all without their leading scorer, Taminder Dhaliwal, who was nursing a sore knee. The team opened play on Thursday night with a disappointing loss to the Quest Kermodes 68-47. The 19-point loss was much closer than the score suggested. Kwantlen was hanging with the Kermodes until midway through the third quarter when Ruth Thanert – named a tournament all-star – single-handedly scored eight unanswered points to extend the lead. “I don’t think the score was indicative of how close the game was. We missed some free throws, had a couple defensive

breakdowns where we were just a little slow on our rotation, but I definitely think the game was a lot closer than the score. I think overall we did a really good job at both ends of the floor,” said McKay. The Eagles followed up that tough loss with a dominant performance against Columbia Bible College on Friday night. Kwantlen got contributions from almost every player that hit the floor en route to an 89-54 victory. The team looked much more confident against the Bearcats, probably because the Eagles already held two wins over them in regular season play. Leading the way for the Eagles was a 20-point effort from Samantha McPhail. Five Kwantlen players hit double digits for scoring in the game. “We came in with a goal of playing hard for 40 minutes like we had on the Thursday, and focussing on some of the things we did well in that game… and I think our confidence just grew as the game went on,” said McKay. Kwantlen’s final game of the weekend would prove to be their toughest challenge of the tournament. Despite having lost three straight games, the Lan-

gara Falcons managed to take down the confident Eagles with a 65-52 victory. The game against the Falcons was the first that really highlighted how much the Eagles missed Dhaliwal over the weekend. Despite points from eight different players, there was no standout on the Eagles’ offense; third-year forward Chantelle Doerksen led the team with 11 points. Meanwhile, Langara’s Carling Muir – named the tournament’s most outstanding player and all-star – was unstoppable as she led her team to victory with 18 points. The Eagles just had no answer for Muir in the paint. The Falcons also got 12 points from both Stephanie Scott, who was named one of the tournament all-stars, and Rhea Silvestri. Still, a 1-2 record isn’t bad for the Eagles without the injured Dhaliwal, who has been averaging close to 15 points per game this season. The Eagles also had rookie forward Oxana Senyuk named one of the tournament’s all-stars along with Thanert, Muir, Scott and Sharece Thoutenhoft of Columbia Bible College.

CULTURE

page twelve | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

FILM

MUST SEE

Black Swan a rogue locomotive headed for ﬁreworks factory

TO N

IO S

U/T HE

Success of ﬁlm studies course about to enrich student culture Dr. Dorothy Barenscott’s new Intro to Film Studies course was a quick catalyst to creating a healthy space for student cinephiles. The result? A cineclub and a possible screening auditorium spearheaded by the Kwantlen professor.

KRISTI ALEXANDRA CULTURE EDITOR

rance in 1895, the concept wasn’t widely respected. In fact, many were reluctant to think of film as art and even more thought that “movies” wouldn’t stick around. Even the brothers themselves readily admitted that “the cinema [was] an invention without any future.” The technology that birthed the mass medium of movies sparked a debate much like the one we’re currently having with the explosion of social media; a debate that has us asking if what’s good for the masses is good for the individual and “is this really going to stick?” Dr. Dorothy Barenscott, who initiated and instructed the Art History department’s new Intro to Film Studies course, teaches with the same paradigm. The tech-savvy art historian’s didactic measures include getting students to visit her webpage (www.dorothybarenscott.com), follow her tweets and create discussion through a Facebook page that she’s linked to her blog, the Avant-Guardian—all measures which have helped push the success of the course. But instructing the class

wasn’t without its pitfalls. “One of the biggest hiccups, if you will, was not being able to screen films in comfort,” says Barenscott. “At SFU, I teach in a true cinema,” she says. “At Kwantlen, I’m screening in regular classrooms with equipment not suitable for showing films.” One of the initiatives that the avid tweeter is trying to make is converting a space on the Surrey campus into a proper cinema screening room, along with mentoring a “cineclub” for students interested in watching and discussing films outside of the classroom. “Surrey does not have a repertory theatre which is a crime,” she says. “Part of what we talked about [in class] is how important the actual experience of screening a film is; what it is to be in a dark room; what it is to see things much bigger.” “If we can do that, not only would that completely shift the comfort level to watch films but it is a true environment in which films should be screened,” she maintains. The help of having a repertory theatre just might help the course “stick” a little better, and promote a stronger cultural influence at Kwantlen—some-

thing that many students know is lacking at our multi-campus university. Even if the goal of getting proper cinematic facilities isn’t realized, Barenscott upholds that the success of film studies within the Art History department can be measured in other ways. “For me, the success has already come in terms of opening students on to the idea…that they can appreciate and understand the connection of early filmmaking as tied to the history of these moments and also to the technological changes that are happening now. When you see the transition to colour from black and white, the transition of television taking away from filmmaking: those are the same issues that we’re dealing with now but in different ways.” Not that the new Kwantlen instructor is about to “give up”, she maintains that “we could create a lot of buzz with a decent repertory theatre. It’s a hole that needs to be filled in this community.” The Cineclub’s first meeting will take place on Monday, Jan. 31 on the Surrey campus. Dorothy will be heading the meeting in room D128 from 2:45 p.m. to 3:45 p.m.

Dorothy’s top ﬁve must-see ﬁlms for students 1. Breathless Directed by Jean-Luc Godard “A primer on new wave French film. A must for anyone interested in the first breath of European, Nouveau and Avant-Garde film making.” 2. 1900 Directed by Bernardo Bertolucci “Unexpected film with incredibly beautiful imagery; taboo-breaking but startling.”

3. Mean Streets Directed by Martin Scorcese “If you thought Goodfellas was good, Mean Streets is Goodfellas times 10.” 4. Wings of Desire Directed by Wim Wenders “Recent European history in a nutshell.” 5. Triumph of the Will Directed by Leni Riefenstahl “If you want to understand how propaganda can be beautiful.”

CARLIE AUCLAIR HEALTH BUREAU CHIEF

hen one thinks of a classic ballet film, you would naturally think of fluffy pink tutus, tattered pointe shoes and lithe, determined ballerinas. While Daren Aronofsky’s latest film does include these expected cliché themes, there ends up being more to this film than meets the eye. The best way to describe Black swan is that it is a psychological, and at times, psychedelic, ballet thriller. Mr. Aronofsky might have discovered an undiscovered niche for all those off the cuff, art-house film-loving ballerinas that have been clinging to their overused VHS copies of Centre Stage, wishing it could be more than it is ( Hell I’ve been there!). Alas, a new genre is born! The story centers on the main character Nina (Natalie Portman), a constantly quivering, mentally fragile ballerina who has suddenly found herself in the prestigious lead role of Swan Lake. It just so happens that this version of the legendary ballet requires its lead dancer to play both the parts of the white swan and black swan–a feat deemed, by real life ballerinas, as next to impossible due to the amount of stamina it takes to play just one of the roles. Like all good thrillers, a wild card is thrown into the mix and essentially comes in the form

of Portman’s understudy, Lily (Mila Kunis). On getting to know the tattooed street wise character, we find out that she is brash, confident and sexually relevant; all things that Portman’s character strives to be in order to successfully pull off the daunting role of the Black Swan. And because Nina is by nature a polite perfectionist, she finds herself buckling under the extreme pressure and plunging head first into a cesspool of mental unrest and freaky hallucinations. As if all that wouldn’t be enough to deal with, Nina has to convince her Euro-suave misogynistic ballet director (Vincent Cassel) that she’s worthy of such a meaty role, despite her coquettish demeanor. Because of all of the melodrama and plot twists the movie runs through you like a rogue locomotive headed for a fireworks factory; that is complimented perfectly by the climactic pace of Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake score. By the end of this fantastic frenzy of a film, I found myself wanting to collapse as if I myself had taken on the taxing lead role of the Black Swan; and despite the movie’s brief flirtations with soapy melodrama, the characters and plot seem to prevail all the while folding nicely within each other– making the movie a sparkling indie ballet gem hidden among a stinking sea of homogenized neo-dance films. Time to step down Step Up!

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BUREAU CHIEF ELECTION

Want to be a part of The Runner? Run for one of our Bureau Chief positions. Elections will be held Feb. 11 at 3p.m. at The Runner office. #205-12877 76 Ave., Surrey

Contact: editor@runnerrag.ca

CULTURE

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2010 | page thirteen

MUSIC

JAMMIN’ WITH GINGER

Kwantlen’s got talent: “Kalvonix” Tiu Kwantlen student Calvin “Kalvonix” Tiu, born prematurely with a series of health complications, just wanted to grow up “normal”. Instead, became a successful young rapper with a perspective different from your average university student. I RICK KUMAR

alvin Tiu, who was born three months premature, was afflicted with Spastic Diplegia, a form of Cerebral Palsy. This disease affects the proper development of muscle tissue often below the waist including hips, legs, pelvis and feet; those affected remain very stiff and unable to move properly and easily. In Tiu’s case, he has extreme stiffness of his muscles, with his left leg longer than the other, causing a permanent shuffle. He requires crutches to walk, which he can do with much difficulty, or use his motorized wheelchair. This has not stopped his positive attitude and outlook on life. His shuffle is what he and his friends now refer to as his “Swagger”. Standing at 4-2, having performed at the Yaletown Olympic Venue in front of an arena which held more than 250,000, Tiu’s nothing to be coughed at. Having worked with such producers as Eminem, Kanye West, and Drake’s own Chin Injeti, Tiu has taken the local music scene to new heights. He surpassed his own expectations when he was invited to perform at the 2010 Winter Olympics. Performing at several charity functions and in front of council members at City Hall solidified Tiu’s name in the music scene. “Kalvonix” opened just a short time before Karl Wolf took

Tiu spends a day in the studio with Canadian hip-hop artist and producer, Chin Injeti. RICK KUMAR/THE RUNNER

My goal isn’t to change the world of rap music. I just want to make it a lot like a new version of windows. Easy access, clean usage, and all types of user friendly... ∏ Calvin Tiu

stage at KPU’s Cram Jam, many underestimated his ability but quickly had a change of heart. By the end, Calvin had the crowd swaying with him as he performed his rendition of Jay Z’s “Empire State of Mind”. Tiu is a student at Kwantlen Polytechnic University and can often be found at the Surrey Campus, willing to freestyle to anyone who will listen. Tiu has worked with many great singers, musicians and performers locally and overseas and is always on the lookout for new talent. Having any class with Tiu is a class worth waking up for. Watch out though, he isn’t afraid to tear up the floor lyrically if challenged and he doesn’t stop at hip-hop. He has worked with country, pop, techno and rock musicians. “If you bump like I bump. If you grab a mic like I grab a mic, and you aren’t afraid to spill a little soul into your work then why haven’t we had a collab yet?” are words often heard from a cheerful Tiu when talking with aspiring singers. Tiu’s music deserves a constant influx of new ears, so check out his Facebook. If you think you’re good enough, or if you really just want to try your hand at music, give him a holler and who knows you might just end up getting a taste of what it’s like to be walking aside Kwantlen’s most famous student.

Kristi’s top 5 anticipated albums

KRISTI ALEXANDRA CULTURE EDITOR

onsidering the amount of fucking awesome albums released last year, being 2011 is probably like dating a dude whose ex was the queen of blowjobs. How can you possibly live up to that? Will 2011 spend its entire duration trying to live up to the musical prowess of last year? One can only hope. Here are five of the most (potentially) awesome albums coming out this year: 1. Lykke Li – Wounded Rhymes “Get Some” was released a couple months ago: a sexual innuendo-laden vignette teasing for the big release. If the rest of the album is as good and/or sexy as this song, you can file this album under “fuck list”. 2. The Dodos – No Color It’s been a while since this duo has released anything. No Color will be the twosome’s fourth album, and considering the internet-leak fiasco of their last album, Time to Die, the boys are keeping a tight lid on this one. 3. The Kills – TBA Another lo-fi duo with lots of fuzzed-out swagger. Are you guys writing your material while on tour this spring, or will we get our hands on a vinyl at the show? 4. My Morning Jacket – TBA If you’ve never seen Jim James (or Yim Yames, as he’s often called) live, you’re missing out on a spiritual experience. This album will yield more of the same. 5. Iron & Wine – Kiss Each Other Clean For no other reason than its sad, sappy folk-rock inspiring teenage memories, it’ll be interesting to see if the band grew up with us, or if the album will remain in the trophy case of high-school nostalgia.

GROAT IN THE SACK

Baby, it’s cold outside This is Jeff Groat. He’s the Runner’s sex columnist. He has only one qualification for the job: his last name sounds like a dirty word. That’s good enough for us.

JEFF GROAT LIFESTYLE BUREAU CHIEF

he stretch from New Years to Easter is notorious for its long, dark days and fits of nasty depression in all but the best of us. For the rest, we turn to alcohol to drown our sorrows and numb us to the routine of modern existence. Here’s a list of alcoholic drinks and a little about what each says about the personalities of the people who drink them. Cheers.

White wine You are too old for the bar scene, but you love wedding dance floors. Cheap beer You’re a man’s man, man. Expect to see a lot of other man’s men. Dark beer You’re like red wine drinkers, but more accessible. Fruit beers Go shave your bush, hippie.

Moonshine Men who like women dressed up as nurses.

Fruit wine You’ll wake up with the sunrise on a grassy hill in summertime on a vineyard. Breakfast is scones with local honey-apricot preserves. You live here with four horses and two BMWs.

Red wine You have patience, attention to detail and a penchant for doing things right. Sex.

Vodka-cranberry Health nut. You’ll be hung-over by the time they’re done with you. With you.

Whiskey Rough sex anyone? Jail time anyone? Rum and coke A guy with an 80s ponytail. A lady who thinks Porsches are sexy. Rum and OJ Island riddims and island herbs be emanatin’ from da bedroom. Gin and anything Poor students and Winston from 1984 drink gin. Dom-Sub people. Creme de menthe Taken with one Viagra, two Centrum Silver. Brandy & Cognac Tupac and fat, white bankers. Both usually seen with cigars and stacks of money. Coolers PRTY animalZ.

FREE FOOD, FREE DRINKS FREE MEETING WHEN: Every Friday at 2:00 pm WHERE: Runner Office. #205 - 12877 76 Ave. Surrey, B.C. WHAT: Discuss the upcoming issue and other important decisions

page fourteen | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

CULTURE

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

GAMES

REVIEW

Starcraft 2 goes onwards to Char I

JARED VAILLANCOURT CREATIVE WRITING BUREAU CHIEF

tarcraft 2: Wings Of Liberty is Blizzard’s long-overdue sequel to the award-winning and epically entertaining Starcraft and Starcraft: Brood Wars video games. However, instead of a standard strategy game where you command your units and hope for the best, Starcraft 2 has a role-playing aspect to it as well. Anyone who’s played the original Starcraft knows the hero Jim Raynor, the Marshallturned-freedom-fighter-turnedrevolutionary/mercenary, who lost his Ghost assassin girlfriend Sarah Kerrigan to the alien Zerg. (And by “lost”, we mean she was infested by the Zerg and eventually ascended to their hive Queen to wreak havoc and terror on the peoples of the galaxy). While the player in the original game took on the persona of either the mysterious Magistrate, the horrific Cerebrate or the enigmatic Executor, Starcraft 2 puts you in Raynor’s shoes as you fight to bring down the oppressive Dominion that he inadvertently helped rise to power over the oppressive Confederacy (his good friend Magistrate reminds him of this as affectionately and often as possible). The game itself is similar to the original Starcraft, except the units are 3D and the engine is greatly improved. You can upgrade units back aboard Raynor’s flagship Hyperion between missions, and the upgrades last the entire game. Each mission unlocks new units and research opportunities (upgrades that are uniquely derived from Zerg and Protos’s ingenuity) and grants the player money to either hire mercenaries to help on missions, or upgrade the in-mission units with powerful bonuses and abilities. Missions are also given to the player

in a non-linear fashion, allowing each Starcraft 2 experience to be unique–although certain events are still bound to happen (the final invasion of Kerrigan’s fortress world of Char, for example). Some choices made before key missions also affect how Raynor’s friends react to him, either isolating certain individuals or earning him respect. Players start each mission by fortifying their base and preparing their army for war. Some missions have unique objectives that require players to either destroy certain targets or protect key assets (there are only a few missions where you have to annihilate everything you see). Each unit you build has unique abilities, such as the Viking’s cool transformation sequence that turns it from a spiffy fighter jet into an awesome killer robot walker, or the Colossus’ great cliff-climbing skills. Everything in the game is faster, stronger

and smarter – so much so, that playing slow, weak or dumb will result in death (as one would expect). The story of the game is also a Blizzard classic. Raynor has been bar-ridden, wallowing in self-loathing for allowing the Dominion to rise to bloody power. Kerrigan and her Zerg have been strangely quiet ever since they beat everyone out of her space, and Raynor’s Protoss allies have been busy doing whatever the hell it is Protos’s do. He soon has a lot to do when his old freedom fighter buddy Tychus shows up out of the blue encased in a powered armour suit, offering to help him restart his revolution with some help from a benefactor searching for ancient alien artifacts. Finding one on his homeworld/place of exile Mar Sara, however, soon results in the Zerg spontaneously re-invading Dominion space. Things quickly become more complicated than either of them had hoped for. As you progress through the game, your social choices for Raynor change the way some events turn out. If you decide to help the Protoss eradicate the refugees of a hot scientist chick who sought you out for your mercy, she’ll not only hate you (although the Protoss and their huge fucking armada will love you), she’ll mutate into a Zerg like her people and you’ll have to put her down personally. If you defy the Protoss to allow her to try to research a cure, however, then the Protos’s (and their huge fucking armada) will loathe you and she’ll be torn apart by Zerg-people anyways. Having the Protos’s on your side later on, however, has certain advantages. With its unique assortment of missions, compelling story and excellent online play, Starcraft 2: Wings Of Liberty is certainly a must-have for any serious (or fresh-faced) PC gamer.

Agokwe celebrates two-spirited First Nations I

ABBY WISEMAN COORDINATING EDITOR

anabush, the trickster in many First Nation’s storytelling, threads together the tale of two young men battling with their sexuality, while giving context to the influence of Western influence on the changing attitudes towards homosexuality in the one-man play Agokwe. The play, which ran from Jan. 17 to Jan. 22 at the Cultch theatre, follows Jake, a shy, young, gay First Nation’s man, and Mike, a sought after hockey player who masks his homosexuality with bravado. The two locked eyes at a Warehouse One Jeans store at the Kenora Shopping Mall, but have never met because they live on different reserves and hide their sexuality. The All Nations hockey tournament in Kenora is a perfect opportunity for the two to meet up, but due to fear of being found out, a rendez-vous is hard

for Jake to orchestrate. With help from the tricky Nanabush the two find a way to reveal their feelings. Agokwe (pronounced “agoo-kway), flows between six characters, including a promiscuous young woman, Goose; to an insecure hockey player battling with his sexuality, Mike; to Nanabush, the trickster in First Nations story-telling; to Betty, Mike’s mother who battles alcoholism, all acted by Waataate Fobister, who created the play. The play’s backbone is in the complex characters, which make up for the sometimes rocky transitions. More important though, is the educating by the character Nanabush, of the First Nation’s traditional view of homosexual or two-spirited people. Nanabush reveals that two-spirited, or Agokwe, people were accepted and revered in First Nation society, but as traditional culture slips away, so does the esteemed opinion of homosexuals. Though rough in some parts, Agokwe is a thought provoking play that gives insight into the lives of First Nations and the loss of traditional culture.

GAMES

Generic game-play, hidden story in Tron: Evolutions I

JARED VAILLANCOURT CREATIVE WRITING BUREAU CHIEF

ron: Evolutions is a video game juxtaposition. What’s that, you ask? Anyone who’s played The Force Unleashed and/or Mirror’s Edge will basically have played Tron: Evolutions. It incorporates the combo-style combat of the former with the freedom of movement of the latter. Since both of those games sat poorly with the critics, it’s easy to imagine Tron (as most movie-based video games go) surrendering to the same scathing flames. However, this game has something the others don’t: a good story. Everything else about the game is a generic sham, so never mind. However, the surprisingly in-depth and entertaining

legend of Tron: Evolutions follows the tale of Anon (literally: Anonymous), a police/security officer who tries to help Quorra during the movie’s infamous Purge. If you haven’t seen the movie, Quorra is a type of computer program known as an ISO, a sentient self-determining free radical capable of independent thought. The Purge, on the other hand, is this computer game’s universe’s version of the Holocaust. A basic program named CLU, made in the image of the legendary Kevin Flynn, takes power from that worthy in a bloodless coup in order to eradicate the ISOs. Although Flynn escapes (at the apparent sacrifice of the heroic warrior Tron), Quorra and Anon are the only witnesses to CLU’s treachery.

As CLU’s warriors and war machines work to suppress the citizens of the capital city, Anon and Quorra work to escape and make their way to Arjia city, where the ISOs live in an egalitarian utopia. There they seek the newly elected co-administrator of the entire system, an ISO named Radia. Although Radia still holds ties with her co-administrator CLU, agreeing to help him hunt down the virus that allegedly killed Flynn, she is quick to believe Quorra when she tells her what really happened. Radia sends Anon to another ISO who helped Flynn escape, but before either can make it to their beloved leader, the alleged virus actually appears and kills Anon’s new partner. Anon barely escapes and finds his way back into Arjia

city, which CLU’s warships are in the process of annihilating. Before he can get to Radia, CLU reveals his betrayal to Radia and uses the virus (go figure, he created) to kill Radia. Before Anon can react, Quorra violently attacks, only to be knocked out and kidnapped by CLU’s forces. Anon is caught in the destruction of Arjia city, and passes out in the depths of the grid. Anon awakes some time later to Flynn himself, who uses the fragments of the dying virus to upgrade Anon’s disk and give him a fighting chance to infiltrate CLU’s flagship. Anon confronts CLU (who remarks, “No one’s managed to kill this guy yet? What the hell!?!”) and defeats his elite guards. The rescue effort is interrupted however, when the virus invades

the ship in an attempt to get revenge on CLU. Anon kills the virus, destroys the ship and barely manages to save Quorra before sacrificing himself to ensure her survival. At the end of the game, Quorra watches as Anon dies before her eyes, and wanders the wastelands alone until Flynn rescues her. In short, the story of the game covers the Purge, as after Anon’s sacrifice, Quorra is the only ISO left alive. Flynn is trapped in the Grid, and the stage is set for the events of the movie. While the game itself is sub-par (and would probably have worked better as a movie by itself), the tale is quite compelling and, for that reason at least, makes the game worth playing. Don’t let the mediocrity of the game engine get you down, though.

TRAVEL

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page ﬁfteen

BANGKOK

One night in

Bangkok was almost too much I

MATTHEW BOSSONS TRAVEL BUREAU CHIEF

y initial dislike of Bangkok started quickly after my flight from Seoul, South Korea. I had just arrived in Thailand for my first time, and was obviously very excited. I had the luck of running into a couple of other Canadians, both from Calgary, on my flight. We all cleared customs together, found our bags and exited the airport looking for a taxi to the downtown area. It was very crowded infront of the airport as about six planes landed at the same time, meaning there was a substantial back-log of people trying to find a ride–and the taxi drivers were charging accordingly. After trying to find a reasonably priced ride with no success, the three of us decided to sit in the pub outside the airport and wait an hour for the rush to calm down. We agreed that beer was good, since we were all wide awake at 12:30 a.m.. On our way to the bar we were ambushed by a small, skinny Thai man. He promised

us a reasonably priced ride to Khao San Road, and a beer on the way into town. We initially turned down his offer, something didn’t seem right about this character; but after a few minutes of persuasion, we reluctantly found ourselves crammed into a small taxi headed for downtown Bangkok. In retrospect it was a terrible idea to get into that cab, but what can you do? Every decision appears simpler and more obvious in retrospect. The cabbie dropped my Calgarian friends off at their accommodation, which was roughly a block from Khao San Road, and proceeded to drive me half-way across the city to an expensive and remote hotel. I had never been to Bangkok before, and I had no idea where I was going, and was taken advantage of by a shameless, skinny cab driver. The whole drive he assured me I was going to the nicest, cheapest and cleanest guest house on Khao San Road, but little did I know was going to be pressured into staying at a mediocre hotel for a ridiculous price over a half hour drive from Khao San. What really got to me was the fact that I was supposed to meet

my friends at a bar on Khao San for drinks, but the half-hour drive to them was unrealistic, and I knew I couldn’t make it back before the bars closed. So instead I laid in bed, furious at the cab driver and his misleading pitch to take me to a cheap guesthouse nearby. I drank a few beers from the mini-fridge in my room and chain smoked a half-pack of cigarettes before I finally fell asleep, vowing to leave Bangkok come sunrise. And I did. The next morning I left Bangkok and travelled south, then north, then further north, and then, as my trip was drawing to a close, I realized I would have to head back to Bangkok to catch my flight home. I decided to head back to Bangkok a few days before my flight, just in case something happened and my bus trip from Chiang Rai took longer than predicted. This meant I would be spending two days in a city I absolutely despised, I wasn’t looking forward to it. Upon arrival, I checked into a cheap, three story guesthouse on Khao San Road. It was decent looking from the street and

had a bar and internet cafe on the ground floor, so I figured it would be okay for my short stay. Unfortunately, like all my other experiences in Bangkok, this simple decision lead to another unwanted experience: bed bugs. Now I realize bed bugs are prevalent all over Asia, as well as countless other regions of the world, but it was simply the icing on the cake to a troubling list of bad experiences in Bangkok. Surprisingly this was also my first run-in with bedbugs during my trip, something that amazed other travellers. That all said, I will admit Bangkok can be a fun place to burn a day or two if you have the right attitude, which I didn’t at first. There are lots of Buddhist temples to check out and explore. For example, the Wat Pho, or the Temple of the Reclining Buddha, which is one of the largest and oldest temples in Bangkok, is home to a 46-metre long Buddha. The city is also home to MBK, an 8-story shopping centre popular with both tourists and locals alike. The mall is a good place to pick up a knock-off Rolex or a pair of fake Nike running shoes for a reasonable

price. If you find the mall to expensive there is an endless supply of street markets all over the city, even one floating on water, the Damnoen Saduak Floating Market. There you’ll find a variety of fake goods, cheap souvenirs, art work, and food at shoestring prices. On top of fantastic temples, malls and markets, Bangkok has lots of great establishments to grab a beer on a hot and humid day. If you find yourself on Khao San Road I highly recommend checking out Mulligans, an Irish Pub, with fantastic staff and great happy hour specials. I also met tons of other nice and interesting travellers at Mulligans, which leads me to recommend it as a great place to meet other backpackers. The pub is also a stone’s throw away from a large concentration of street vendors selling cheap, tasty, Thai cuisine. If you can get past the rampant prostitution, pushy street vendors, strange smells, lack of garbage bins and persistent suit tailors – you may actually find something enjoyable about the hub of Southeast Asia, it took a little patience but I know I did.

Montreal

PHOTOS

Students at McGill University in Montreal, Quebec, play a game of cricket on the snow covered sports field. MATT LAW/THE RUNNER

page sixteen | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

WE NEED YOUR WORDS, PICTURES, ATTITUDES AND IDEAS. NEED A REFERENCE LETTER FOR A SCHOLARSHIP, JOB OR PROGRAM? BE A VOLUNTEER AND WE’LL HELP YOU OUT! ALL STUDENTS FROM ALL BACKGROUNDS ARE NEEDED TO MAKE THIS NEWSPAPER WORK, SO PLEASE, DON’T HIDE. FOR MORE INFO EMAIL: EDITOR@RUNNERRAG.CA

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www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

CREATIVE

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page seventeen

POETRY

Mock Heroes and Snow Globes I

TODD EASTERBROOK CONTRIBUTOR

“A poet long dead, Made famous by his head, Hovers above a lecture hall, They study his works, Interpret his quirks, So savvy they think they are. Laughing because they’re wrong, But he has been dead so long, His name is all that lives on, He jests and looks around, Yet no one hears his sound, His poesy known but lost”… Oh man. Words smear blood— Blood smeared words— Candy-apple lip-gloss, carbon-plastic faceplates, unrecognizable outcomes glisten like warm black steel released from a clammy hand. Scarlet are all letters amidst the trepanning barcode. —From the desert, Bound homeward and in a shell— We— Left to die like sage pages, Broke in the loose fog of a snow globe.

with what you know, To be a Gorgon of Gongorism, (To know how) To wield smite and those adjectives that have the will to fall on bereft tears like rain. Words that save the hemorrhage of hemorrhages, and suspend the brain? The prolepsis of your answer banishes me (still) onto a shelf until meningeal words feel their way through your vulgar throat, Seldom back again. (You notice what stains her scarf on the bus as the women come and go) They do not talk of Michelangelo. They do not talk at all. If I don’t make this easy enough, you’ll all go back to your profiles or Google, and I still won’t still be the poet everyone isn’t reading. (A) Man supposes the Black Mare of Night And gallops his refuge under Norse frost The brutish ken of Deliverance Tunes ethos into blood semblances Dingle dee dingle doo Dingle dee dingle dead : Pity man alone:

I take three 5-HTP pills to let me sleep, and to atone my cloudy grey matter. To say, “don’t be a fucking turkey you—You— you—you worthless—excrement of—of—valid existence! You are not bombastic! You never were.” —I lost my thesaurus when I wrote my novel (it became a novella), so “cloudy grey matter” is what you get, got it? Besides, you probably wouldn’t understand the word I might have chosen, and being the little fucker that I am, neither would I. —In fact, my girlfriend would look at another poem and ask, “What does the word ‘baroque’ mean?” And I would say, “It’s a sound— like in music—An old musical sound—Yeah…— You know, like the metronome.” And she would say, “Oh… I see”— Thanks, grey matter. Words are always lifeless, but they dance like brume if you blow on them, Press them into squiggly eatables— Yes, consume them all Humanly digested atop mirky bottoms— Sorry, the “murky” bottom, —Only slightly— Like polyamory, language is never a still phenomenon, it lingers in the crystal of an elder atmosphere, where we are all wanton Agamemnons in limitless banter.

(We all took the monk by his jugular, [He gathered water from the freshest stream] and with our minds deduced him to child and pale) I down a glass of islay whisky every morning, just to get a dial tone… —6 fingers. Exactly, man. (The click-click pucker of a rifle) I “kissed” 13 men, and an overly neurotic woman. I tell myself she was armed. I tell myself she should have been conditioned to all of this by now. —My rifle jammed, (pop-pop-pop—dust sprays)—(blood drops hit the mural) I got hit in the head so hard I’ve forgotten how to tie my shoes. Then I was discharged like a shell casing. I bet governments wish healthcare had never advanced as far as it has(.) because they can’t pay all us undead—Pfizer gave me His hand—We litter pubs and float in public— We wear the camouflage of ghosts—(the stares)— We amputate the public. (But he is He who is Him who is I Am because

(You took life in someone’s hands, and in stuffing it into a dollhousea or your nightstand, you factitiously cum your pants twice while your laptop furiously growls that dull, ominous moan that is glow) I will be short with this… I know that even you do not have the time, to waste. We all burn in the “slow fire” eventually; Grand talks on mechanical pulp idly fade, and— Hold on—wait just one more second—Please—I am speaking to you—Don’t close me, out—I—I have… your culture—Do you remember?— (ring-ring, beep-beep, dingle-dee) —No. The world can wait— If you can— Won’t you try—please, to accost the worlds

TODD EASTERBROOK/THE RUNNER

he fucks me in the ass until I am raw enough for sedation.) Now I make only what I’m worth, and fucking sandwiches are $5.95 at Starbucks: The world’s one cafe’. People say that crow’s feet are undesirable, but I know (of) those who might desire, Them—I’ve learned to read the degree of a smile, (All of that red lipstick) From a myriad of discarded magazines. We have all been made proudly in America. “Why free verse?” you say, “Do you use it for ‘disruptive order’?” “—A sign of liberty, a rejection of the traditional—” “Or merely to allow communication to ‘bleed out’?” “Like the beat-meat of rococo.” Why do you need your cell phone on the table when we eat? I am right here beside you as an organic. Do you comfort the form of your complacency? Is it not freedom formed, merely and severely in the margins? Just like a cold, whirling, emotive clime That dents some eyes like a shaft of light in a quick gale, Then something else—The restful hand, The midnight oil, the loose hinge of the soul— Sulcus chasms. And Nietzsche. Fuck you, you docile, meek, metronomic bastards. Fuck you all. (She knelt on her feet and took a sappy shot in the face) Don’t you feel misused? Don’t you know polyamory is condemned in most spheres? Aren’t you unfaithful as well? —Not for the love of self. “Okay, now some Paxil, please— Just to stay living— I have the symptoms—Wave your wand” (I popped 3 Valium and fell in front of a coal train; The same can be said for democracy)—Now look where we’re at, man— I don’t want to fill your templates. Coprophagic minarets crumble. Nodding off giants grumble into war. (Look there—look there—look there—look here) “The quick fix has not become a lament,” sighs meaningless communication. I measure out my life at bus stops with trodden so(u)l(e)s, Having grown tired of this halcyon tune. We all still freakishly gyrate our snow globes just to see it happen: The absence replete and without, as The Twisted Tune winds itself down, Held blasé in an airy hand— “Brb” “Lol” “Nvm” “C u l8er” What is this strabismic praxis anyway? Like a musician that cannot read the music, and a muse who ne’er shuts up— That mist that soaks you, That mist that penetrates your skin and your eyes; Beads on your skin and coats your eyes; That impenetrable mist that you cannot escape—And the familiar song of hammers deepening into the night—(pop-pop-pop)-I gobble my life’s worth of praziquantel and pray for vertigo--

page eighteen | january 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

CREATIVE

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

SCI-FI

Sine of the times I

JARED VAILLANCOURT CREATIVE WRITING BUREAU CHIEF

“

Are you sitting down, Jeremy?” Barbara’s voice asked. Jeremy sighed – he hated that question. “Yes, he is,” Jeremy’s assistant Theresa answered. He grumbled and waved her off – her narrating his movements over the link was a habit he despised as well. Nevertheless, he allowed her to place her hands on his shoulders as he relaxed and held his cane tight. Barbara only asked her nefarious question when she had one thing to say. “Who’s dead, sis?” he asked. Barbara sighed. “Eriksson,” she replied. “The damned Siglith are getting smart. Apparently a small group got into our northern minefield and extracted a mine or two... gave them little robotic legs,” she explained. Jeremy grunted and reached up to rub the sightless eyes beneath his sunglasses. Barbara’s daily calls almost always included news of another comrade-in-arms falling to the sneaky, dastardly Siglith. He had never – nor ever would – see one; they took to that almost personally. “Let me guess,” Jeremy scoffed. “Eriksson went out on patrol and ended up giving a surprise piggy-back to one of our own tools.” Theresa gasped, but the silence from Barbara’s end of the line confirmed his suspicions. “I told that dumb fool he’d be caught with his pants down someday.” “We found the creatures responsible,” Barbara whispered, knowing it made

POETRY

little difference. He made no noise as he sat there, trying to picture his replacement’s face. “He tried his best to measure up to you, big B,” she finished. He heard the click that announced her severing the link. “Are you all right, Sergeant?” Theresa asked. Jeremy sighed and stood up, feeling her arms go around his left bicep as he did so. After a moment he offered a curt nod. “You know, we don’t have to do our rounds today if you need time to... yourself,” she hesitated. He felt her hand slip down to his and squeeze. “I know it’s hard to lose friends, after all – my cousin’s fiance died in this war not two weeks-” “It’s not a damned war,” Jeremy corrected, tossing his cane to the left. Something made a crashing sound. “These stupid Siglith show up out of nowhere, make some weird claim that we’ve ‘stolen’ their ancient homeworld and boom – they’re everywhere, disorganized and sloppy.” Theresa’s hands left his arm as she went to retrieve his cane. “These aren’t warrior tactics – they’re damned terrorist ploys!” “You shouldn’t yell,” Theresa whispered kindly as the weight of his cane reappeared in his hand, her warmth returning to the other. “If you want, we can go for a walk. Would that make you feel better?” she asked. Jeremy nodded. “So long as it’s a short, sweet and to the pub.” “Are you sitting down, big B?” Barbara asked. Jeremy grunted and cupped his face with his hands. “Who was it this time?” he grunted up at Theresa. That

worthy swallowed and repeated the question aloud, her tone making it clear she was glad he never accepted nor transmitted video feed whenever someone called. Jeremy shivered despite the warmth of her flesh against his as Barbara inhaled deeply. “You remember Steiner, that creepy Aryan guy?” his sister asked. Silence. “Well... another small group jumped him and his men in the forest while they were weeding out surveillance equipment. Bloody lizard-bugthings tore him almost clean in two.” Theresa gasped, and Jeremy held her tight. “Steiner was a good man,” Jeremy whispered, feeling the tear only once it had fallen past his cheek. “He had this old joke he loved to tell. ‘A German man walks into one of your English pub-bars. He says to the barkeep, ‘I will have two martinis!’ The barkeep asks, ‘Dry?’ The German immediately rebuttals’...” “ ‘Nein! I said I want two’!” Barbara’s voice finished with a chuckle. He waited a second for Theresa to clue in, but after a moment, his sister continued, “I’ll give the weirdo that – he did teach the platoon to count in German.” “What’s left of it.” “Jeremy!” Theresa whispered, shocked. “I’m sorry, Barbara. I’m sure he didn’t mean to say-” “No, no... it’s okay,” Barbara replied. “Some of us are starting to feel the same way. We’ve spent months killing Siglith and more pour out of that downed ship to replace them. If we could only nuke the bloody thing...” She sighed. He heard something

like a plastic wrapper crinkle on her end. “How are the eyes, big B?” “Worthless,” Jeremy scoffed. He hesitated as Theresa’s fingers gently caressed his cheek, moving up into the numb region between both temples. “The doctors still can’t figure out what the hell they hit me with. It’s hard... and the news doesn’t help,” his throat made a strange sound, the hybrid of a disgruntled grunt and a laugh. “But Theresa’s been a huge help.” That worthy’s lips brushed against his. Barbara chuckled. “That’s good to hear.” The link clicked off. “Do you need to be alone?” Theresa asked, her warm breath on his ear. Jeremy sighed. “Ask me in a minute.” Jeremy poked at the obstacle with his cane, imagining it to be a pylon or wet floor sign. “Come on, Jeremy! You can do it!” Theresa called out, her hands clapping. He hesitated, but stepped as best he could around the obstacle, tapping his cane like she had taught him. Another block felt as though it was the hospital wall, and another could have been a spare bed from triage. He tapped past them until a hand touched his. “Theresa?” he asked. Her lips met his, tongue darting quickly in and out of his mouth. “You did it,” she whispered. He laughed as her arms cradled his bicep, guiding him back down the hallway athat had until now seemed infinite and frightening. “I guess I should be worried, Jeremy. Soon enough you won’t need me.” “I wouldn’t say that,” he

laughed. Another quick, discreet kiss danced in his mouth. She led him in silence, her hands secretly squeezing his arm as the welcome sounds of the recreational centre approached. “What time is it?” he asked once they were seated, the faint aroma of cinnamon teasing his nostrils. “An hour before four,” Theresa replied, taking his cane. Her weight shifted the balance of the cushions on the sofa. He smiled and took in a deep breath, enjoying the cinnamon smell as it drifted away. Boots making cadence across the tiled floor interrupted the atmosphere he’d been enjoying. “Sgt. Maxwell? Mr. Jeremy, I presume?” an unfamiliar voice asked. “He’s a colonel,” Theresa whispered. “His name-tag reads ‘Blythe’.” Jeremy stood, his cane reappearing in his hand as he snapped a crisp salute. Colonel Blythe chuckled and instead shook Jeremy’s hand. “It’s an honour to meet you, sir,” Jeremy announced. Blythe grunted and tentatively touched his arm. “Here, over this way, sir,” another voice instructed with soft whispers. “Bah, damned Siglith blinders, eh?” Blythe chuckled. “I was hit not three days ago.” “I sympathize, sir,” Jeremy grunted as Theresa guided him back down, “but I don’t have a lot of time. My sister calls me every day at four o’clock tea-time prompt and–”. He hesitated. Not a sound could be heard. Blythe sighed. “Are... are you sitting down, son?”

STUDENT ART

War of souls I TODD EASTERBROOK

War of souls— Rough reveling— Embankments of leather— Her wild wilderness disturbs my genitals; Scenes of lust in the lushhollowed arroyo Save the enjambment of names, for Your eyes of fuck me now say more Than your mouth wide open, as you Sweat for me and I sardonically thumb Your lips with thumps— trumps, and deliciously lubricious backbeats; An ethereal kick drum in the night— Perimeters open and eternal reward is Within our grasp, or thrust— A dynamo, of dominos: We fall all over each other And more are affected. ANTONIO SU/THE RUNNER

PROCRASTINATION

www.runnerrag.ca | The Runner

vol. 3 issue 12 | January 26 2011 | page nineteen

ADOBE WAN KENOBI — BEN HORNE

HOROSCOPE PISCES Feb. 20 - Mar. 20

If your suitcase falls over in the middle of the night it’s probably a rape ghost.

GEMINI May 21 - June 20

When a large Mexican prostitute says “hey baby” you should probably say “hello.”

ARIES Mar. 21 - Apr.19

AQUARIUS Jan. 21 - Feb. 19 You should really retire that ejaculation blanket. It looks a little worn out.

CANCER June 21 - July 22

If someone gives you a quarter you should probably vibrate for them.

Don’t lick giant blue balls, your tongue might freeze to them.

TAURUS Apr. 20 - May 20

LEO July 23 - Aug. 22

You don’t need an A in art to get into journalism school.

See that electricity socket over there? Go dance with it.

RIP OFF KWANTLEN

VIRGO Aug. 23 - Sept. 22

It’s four in the morning. Too late for turkey, too early for wine. Poutine?

LIBRA Sept. 23 - Oct. 22

It is completely acceptable to sing Celine Dion songs in place of speaking French.

SCORPIO Oct. 23 - Nov. 21

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22 - Dec. 21

If you drop your wine glass, two other people will drop theirs. Or beer bottles.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22 - Jan.19

Every time you open your mouth, people are bashing you on twitter. In another language.

Your friend’s brown aura may haunt you while he has night-terrors in Ottawa. Look for the spot.

THE SMART ZONE

That’s not a medium

WEIRD STUFF: SAY WHAAAAT? MATT LAW/THE RUNNER

What ever happened to medium actually being bigger than a small? A small coffee at Tim Hortons on Kwantlen’s Surrey campus is the size of a sippy-cup and the medium ain’t much bigger. This is an absolute travesty... I know this is a lame Rip-off-Kwantlen but it’s all we have this week. Sorry.

In Toronto, Ontario, it’s illegal to drag a dead horse down Yonge St. on a Sunday. In Fort Qu’Appelle Quebec it is illegal for a teen to walk downtown main street with his shoes untied. Every fifth song on the radio must be by a Canadian born citizen. Source: http://www.helium.com/

page twenty | January 26 2011 | vol. 3 issue 12

The Runner | www.runnerrag.ca

THE

Writing workshop LEARN HOW TO WRITE A NEWS STORY

JAnUARY 27

2011 ThursDAY 6:30pm-9:00pm where: KWANTLEN Richmond CAMPUS ROOM 3650 GUEST SPEAKER THE PROVINCE REPORTER AND KWANTLEN JOURMALISM INSTRUCTOR

ANN REES DISCOVER* SCANTHIS *DOWNLOAD THE QR CODE APP