2013
Sunday May 19, 2013 Crowne Plaza Hotel Seattle Produced by: RainbowWeddingNetwork.com
The Same Love, Same Rights 速 Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
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A Welcome Message -from Cindy & Marianne, RWN Founders
Welcome to our 5th Annual Same Love, Same Rights® LGBT Wedding Expo, proudly produced by RainbowWeddingNetwork.com! CONGRATULATIONS on your upcoming ceremony! It is our hope that this event Show Guide will make your wedding plans that much easier, providing you with helpful tips as well as immediate access to a variety of screened, LGBT-friendly wedding vendors. For further information about today’s exhibitors & advertisers, visit their websites directly. We also invite you to check us out online at www.RainbowWeddingNetwork.com – since 2000, we’ve been providing the LGBT community with a diversity of wedding resources and we’ve proudly produced over 100 Gay & Lesbian Wedding Expos in twentyfour different states throughout the nation. JOIN US as we continue to create a bridge between couples like you and forward-thinking wedding professionals, who uphold a policy of non-discrimination. Again, Congratulations to you & your partner, during this historic time in Washington State!
SEATTLE DOWNTOW N
Cover Image of Lisa & Gretchen @ their Garden Gala Wedding Image courtesy www.SarahMarenPhotography.com
The Same Love, Same Rights ® Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
Preferred LGBT-Friendly Wedding Professionals Today’s proud exhibitors support Equal Rights, and many have openly served LGBT couples for a decade or longer. They are ready to assist you & your partner in creating the Ceremony of Your Dreams! Alexander Party Rentals www.AlexanderPartyRentals.com
City Catering Company www.CityCateringCompany.com
Emerald Downs www.EmeraldDowns.com
Art of a Wedding by Natalie Fobes www.FobesPhoto.com
CMS Floral Design www.CMSFloralDesign.com
Equal Rights WA www.EqualRightsWashington.org
Banff Gay Weddings www.BanffGayWeddings.com
Crowne Plaza Hotel Seattle www.CPHotelSeattle.com
Body Smith Chiropractic www.BodySmithChiropractic.com
Curtis Kiepprien Real Estate www.curtiskiepprien.com
Holiday Inn Seattle-Seatac International Airport www.HI-Seatac.com
Bride Box www.BrideBox.com
Design Perfect Catering www.DPCatering.com
“Catch ‘n Release: The Game” www.SusanHartHellman.com
Disco Royale www.DiscoRoyale.biz
Cave B Inn & Spa www.CaveBInn.com
Dynamic Designs Fine Jewelry www.DynamicDesignsJewelry.com
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Joel Dames Photography www.JoelDamesPhotography.com Jubilee Event Engineers www.Jubilee-Seattle.com Kaspars Special Events & Catering www.Kaspars.com Kiana Lodge www.KianaLodge.com
Sunday May 19, 2013
Macy’s www.Macys.com/registry
The Resort at Port Ludlow www.PortLudlowResort.com
Treft Punkt Creative Studio www.TreftPunkt.com
Marci Jewelry www.MarciJewelry.com
Rev. Jan Carter www.SimpliDone.com
Waterways Cruises and Events www.WaterwaysCruises.com
McGavick Conference Center www.cptc.edu/eventcenter
Seattle Aquarium www.SeattleAquarium.org
Wedding Ring Workshop www.AWeddingRingExperience.com
Mikes Amazing Cakes www.MikesAmazingCakes.com
Seattle Gay News www.SGN.org
Weddings by the Sea www.OceanShoresWeddings.com
Perfect Party Photo Booth www.PerfectPartyPhotoBooth.com
The Seattle Lesbian www.TheSeattleLesbian.com
PJ Parsons Presents www.PJParsonsPresents.com
Seattle Men’s Chorus & Seattle Women’s Chorus www.FlyingHouse.org
Pour Girls & Some Guys www.PourGirls.com Provincetown Business Guild www.PTown.org The Rainbow Center www.RainbowCntr.org RainbowWeddingNetwork & SameLoveSameRights® www.RainbowWeddingNetwork.com Ray’s Boathouse Catering www.Rays.com
Seattle Sound DJ seattlesounddj@yahoo.com Sooke Harbour House www.SookeHarbourHouse.com Sparkll www.Sparkll.com Tacoma Art Museum www.TacomaArtMuseum.org Tibbetts Creek Manor www.IssaquahEventSites.com
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Windsong Classical Trio www.WindsongTrio.com Woodland Park Zoo www.Zoo.org
Sunday May 19, 2013
WEDDING PLANNING BASICS he engagement was perfect: romance, wonder, laughter, tears and one gorgeous little band of white gold. It had been everything you’d envisioned, and everything your partner had longed for it to be.
When you were a child, did you dream of Your Wedding Day? What was it like? If we had no budget limit, what crazy and exciting additions would we indulge in for our ceremony? Our honeymoon?
And now the pressure’s really on - Can the moment be topped? Can the two of you pull together the seemingly endless details necessary to create your Dream Wedding Day?
What are some ideas you’ve seen or heard about at other couples’ weddings, that you really thought where incredible? Think of decorative ideas, favors or particular ceremonial aspects that were truly inspiring.
Take a few deep breaths and remember, every big project is made up of many smaller steps, taken one at a time. When the ceremony preparations feel overwhelming, keep this in mind. And First... What’s the utmost important factor that all magnificent ceremonies are built upon?? Communication. Talk with your fiancee (yes, you’re engaged now!), talk, talk and talk some more. At first, and for a few weeks, when you’ve both decided you’re really serious about getting started, just let yourselves indulge and brainstorm and listen to each other. Hold back from calling that caterer or running down referrals from friends. Out at dinner, snuggling in bed, through email at work... find a variety of times and places to share your ideas and just simply talk.
Rate the facets of the wedding, in order of importance to you: the spiritual aspects, rituals, music, gathering the family, honoring your commitment with your partner, the reception party. This level of communication will get you started with a wonderful foundation. And remember to keep yourselves open to new ideas - continue to ask your friends, wedding professionals, officiant and others about thoughts and insights they care to share; it will only make your Ceremony that much more amazing!
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The Same Love, Same Rights ® Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
12MS - 6MS PRIOR TO YOUR DAY Stay Organized: Whether it’s a new app on your phone, notes on the fridge, or the encyclopediasized “Wedding Planner” you buy at the bookstore... do whatever it takes to keep your ideas organized. Begin early, it’ll make a big difference as your plans continue to get more complex! Set Your Budget: This will help the two of you decide what type of venue you’ll have, how many guests will be invited, what types of amenities you’ll include. Be realistic; at the same time remember that this is Your Special Day. Many very meaningful ceremonies have been designed under $5000, others have reached $50K or even more. Wedding Coordinator? The answer will vary for every couple. A coordinator or consultant can take away much of your stress, will keep your planning on schedule, and will serve as an advocate for you should the need arise. Many offer a la carte services, which can help trim your expenses and may best suit your personal style. *Remember: Many ceremony or reception venues offer on-site coordination services. *Often, a best friend would love to help out - ask for what you need! Telling the Family: Many will be overjoyed for you, but even if you’ve been out of the closet for years, sometimes the subject of a wedding will send Mom, Dad or Grandma for a loop. After all, being gay is one thing - committing to it long-term through marriage can seem like another. Give them time. Also, remember that the upcoming event is yours, not theirs... and with that in mind, do your best to distance yourself emotionally from their lack of enthusiasm. But if their response affects your own joy for an extended period, take some serious time to deal with it honestly. The
investment you make now in resolving some of the issues will only serve to benefit you (and your marriage) in the years to come. Pre-Marital Counseling: What an opportunity, now that eyes and ears are wide open with excitement & infatuation, to truly get to know one another! Pre-marital counseling will help you to identify communication styles, as well as the goals & fears that tend to be your fiancee’s driving force. Preparing some conflict resolution strategies in advance will also help to insure the success of your relationship. *Remember, you’ve been working hard to secure equal marriage rights for the LGBT community; it’s one more reason not to take your personal commitment to each other lightly. Register for Gifts/Wedding Webpage: Many LGBT couples have been together for years prior to planning their ceremony; they often don’t see a need for guests to bring traditional gifts. There are other options! Non-traditional gifts may be perfect, such as that ideal double hammock... the lush, bath-size matching towels... that juicer you’ve been dreaming about... Or, many couples set up a honeymoon registry or savings account to which guests may contribute toward the downpayment on their new home, or toward a charity. Your guests truly want to bring gifts, to help celebrate Your Special Day. Energetically and emotionally, it is an integral way for them to complete the cycle of commemorating your joy. So be sure to find some method to adapt the ritual that seems fitting for you and your partner, as well as for those who wish to give. Engagement Photos: Yes, yes, yes! Many couples think twice about this little indulgence, postponing the idea until the ceremony itself is
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Sunday May 19, 2013 suddenly upon them. Don’t let that happen! Even if you’re shy about the camera, or you’re thinking consciously about losing that extra pound or two... set a date with your photographer (or even a friend at the local park) and take the time to make it happen. You’ll be surprised just how many ways you’ll find later to use and enjoy the engagement photos: personalized labels on bottles of wine at the wedding, inserts in holiday cards, and of course keepsakes later on. Reserve Select Vendors: This goes hand-inhand with setting your official Wedding Date, of course. But if you haven’t already, be sure to reserve placement with your chosen ceremony site and reception venue, and with your officiant, DJ, caterer and photographer. And it won’t be long before you’ll want to place an order for your invitations.
Take time to make a Wish-List: The perfect décor, the horse-drawn carriage for your grand entrance, the most delectable custom wedding cake (plus the grooms’ cake plus the chocolate fountain!...), the high-end videographer, the tailored apparel and the perfect shoes, the Bentley for your memorable goodbyes after the reception... Then prioritize, as to which services are really most important, and be sure to begin booking those vendors first. Later, as the plans continue to unfold and your budget adapts, you may find that in fact you can add in more of those extra-special Wish items than you originally thought possible.
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The Same Love, Same Rights ® Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
6MS - 4MS PRIOR TO YOUR DAY Begin Guest List: For many, the creation of the Guest List is an easy task; for others it can be challenging to whittle down the numbers to a final count that is actually manageable for your event. If the task feels burdensome, allow yourself to come back to it in a few days: developing the final list may take many weeks. Fitness Plan / Beauty Regimen: You’ll thank yourself for making an early start; this will give you plenty of time to get to the gym regularly, or to set appointments with your stylist to try out different looks. Many lesbian brides and some gay grooms don’t make hair & make-up a priority, and that of course is perfectly acceptable: Your ceremony ought to reflect your own authenticity. It is sometimes the case, however, that trying out different ideas and allowing yourself to play with new looks may just surprise you. Engagement Party Planning: If you’re considering a shower or engagement party, but aren’t quite sure... take your attendants or best friend out to lunch and ask them to help out with a brainstorming session. And whether you & your partner plan one party, or have separate bachelor/ ette parties, this wedding tradition is meant to combine the unbridled spirit of the ‘last hurrah’ along with a less formal way to celebrate the fact that this very important life milestone is about to take place. It also serves to relax & rejuvenate, which can be quite welcome after months of planning your ceremony. Meet with Your Lawyer: While it is wonderful that marriage is now legal in Washington for gay & lesbian couples, it’s still true that your marriage may not transfer to other states if you should move or travel. It’s best to meet with a legal advisor who has expertise in the field of LGBT rights, to ensure that you & your partner are protected. –Financial
issues, home ownership, child custody, powers of attorney, wills and trusts will all be issues you will want to address. *Remember: Get involved with your local gay rights organization or family equality group! As citizens, we must simply continue to strive for fair and equal representation under the law. It is a responsibility we each must take seriously, in order to enact real change. Selecting the Rings: There are so very many options! While rings, specifically, are not necessary for the completion of your ceremony, most couples today agree that the tradition of the wedding band is one of the most important customs they wish to include. The circular band signifies the ongoing permanence of the marriage commitment. The exchange of the rings during the ceremony signifies the reciprocity of each partner’s pledge, as verbalized through their vows. The engagement ring symbolizes the initial promise that was made, and the wedding band secures that promise eternal. Indeed, the ring represents a beautiful message. Therefore, it ought to be with great care that you choose this little piece of jewelry that will carry the message with each of you into the future. Whether your style is to pick on a whim, or to think through every aspect of the band (particular elements of the metal, accent inscriptions or gemstone inlays...) make the choice out of genuineness and with a heartfelt intent. It will insure that the ring remains perfect for you even decades after your wedding day. Honeymoon Travel: Whether exotic, such as a Hawaiian travel adventure... or low-key, such as a week’s stay at a nearby lakefront hotel, the place and the budget ultimately are not what matters. You and your partner have earned some special time together – enjoy!
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The Same Love, Same Rights ® Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
4MS - 2MS PRIOR TO YOUR DAY Musical Selections: If you are composing your own music, now is certainly the timeframe to make sure you’ve gotten started. If you are hiring a musical ensemble for your ceremony, then be sure to dialogue at length with them about your vision. Your officiant & wedding consultant may also want to be involved with this conversation, as important decisions are made concerning background music, setting the tone, varying tempos, etc. Ceremony music is a wonderful addition: it helps to create the mood early on for your guests as they arrive and are seated. The music will no doubt help to relax them into the festivities, especially if there remains any awkwardness due to the fact that this may be the first time some have attended a same-sex wedding. Selections for your reception music likely will be made at one of the meetings with your DJ. Keep
the lines of communication with your DJ clear and specific (as with all your wedding professionals.) He or she will appreciate your candidness about any requests you may have; it will only help them to serve you more successfully, and more fully to share in your excitement. Let the Party Begin! Fittings: By now, you’re trying on different apparel and making your final choices regarding ceremony attire for yourselves as well as for your attendants. Be sure to schedule fittings and place orders for all that you’ll need (including accessories) – That Special Day is getting closer! Save-the-Date: Ahh, the wonders of the internet! These days, it’s easy to send off save-the-date announcements to your guest list. One batch of emails and you’re done! However, if you prefer the traditional, handwriting the envelopes can get tedious and time-consuming, so remember to allow yourself several days for the task. Be sure to note any address changes or updates to the final guest
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The Lynnwood, WA
Gay & Lesbian Wedding Expo
Sunday Sept. 8, 2013 â—? 1:00-4:00pm Embassy Suites Seattle - North/Lynnwood 20610 44th Ave West Lynnwood, WA 98036 Free Advance Tickets at SameLoveSameRights.com
The Same Love, Same Rights ÂŽ Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo list for later use with the invitations. *Remember: Professional calligraphers can be a miraculous gift to yourselves!
if you chose to make use of one of the vows they promised to their spouse so many years ago?
Preparing Your Vows: Many officiants recall that the most touching vows they’ve ever witnessed have been exchanged between same-sex partners. It’s true, when planning our ceremonies, as two brides or two grooms we must make very conscious choices about every detail of the event (as opposed to heterosexual couples, who oftentimes simply flow with tradition.) This applies to the Vows as well. Most gay and lesbian couples choose to write their own vows, but don’t feel pressured! There are many excellent resources available, and your officiant or friends may have helpful ideas as well. Don’t be shy to ask around – imagine how moved your parents or favorite uncle and aunt would be
Inspiration For Your Vows & Readings � Famous Quotes � Favorite Lyrics or Poetry � Internet searches � Officiant’s insights � Reiterating Vows of your parents, mentors, friends or loved ones � Quotes from marriage rights legislation � Brainstorm - freely write down phrases that move you or capture your feelings
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i*U JT NZ HSFBU KPZ BOE IPOPS UP PĂŻDJBUF BU TBNF TFY XFEEJOHT w
XXX 3FW+BO$BSUFS DPN
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Sunday May 19, 2013
8WKS - 6WKS PRIOR TO YOUR DAY Send Invitations: Your first hard deadline! Six to eight weeks prior to your wedding date, you’ll send out the invitations. That guest list you’ve toiled over is finalized, you’ve investigated the proper etiquette for placement of the invitation, response card and other enclosures within the envelope... and you’re that much closer to Your Special Day! Doublecheck Your Planning List: Have you overlooked any vital details? -Boutonnieres, decorative florals, favors, the caketopper, accessories (necklaces, suspenders, petal baskets or ring pillows, guest book, name card holders, ‘Something old, something new’...) Walk yourself through the entire ceremony, reception and honeymoon to be sure you have everything in order. And if not, there’s still time to fill in those missing details! Finalize Your Documents: Depending on your state of residence, you may be required to file for a marriage license or submit your request for domestic partnership status. Also, your officiant will likely provide a keepsake marriage certificate of some kind, for you & your witnesses to sign at the ceremony, but you will want to check. Many officiants do not have access to certificates specifically written for same-sex couples, so you may have to purchase or create one of your own. Now is also the time to doublecheck that your passports and travel itineraries are being processed accurately, so as to avoid any surprises later on. Engagement Announcement: It’s up to you as to whether you’d like to formalize your announcement through area newspapers or websites. Washington-based papers should be ready to accept LGBT wedding announcements,
but it’s good to give yourself advance time in case there is any discrepancy. This is Your Special Day and you deserve to announce it to the world!
ONE MONTH PRIOR TO YOUR DAY Confirm Reservations: It’s never a bad idea to confirm with your ceremony vendors that everything is set for Your Special Day. Any last minute questions can be answered, and you can rest assured that the logistics of your day will flow along without any major issues. If you have a wedding coordinator, he or she undoubtedly will take care of these last phone calls on your behalf. Gift-Buying: Aren’t you supposed to be the happy recipients of all the goodies?? Of course! but it’s also true that you’ll want to show your gratitude to those who’ll play an important part in your upcoming event. Saying ‘thanks’, sharing hugs and providing timely payment for services rendered all are much appreciated, but you may find that it suits your style to offer another token of kindness. It may add to your own joy, to gift a little something to your ceremony officiant, wedding coordinator, attendants, out-of-town guests and other special helpers or friends. And if you want to buy a gift for one but not another -yet don’t want to leave anyone out- a handwritten card will suffice. Don’t forget Your Sweetie! Decades ago, it was customary for newlyweds to present gifts to one another at the wedding. Of course, your love is the highest gift, but if you’re considering something more, a keepsake, family heirloom, special song or an unexpected honeymoon surprise might each be a wonderful addition. Seating: By now, your wedding coordinator has no doubt cornered you to discuss seating
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The Same Love, Same Rights ® Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo arrangements and name cards for the reception. If instead the task falls to you, relax... it is not a difficult one. Certainly, family dynamics can pose particular challenges; however, receptions have a way of helping anyone slough off their dusty grudges or the day’s awkwardness... so don’t make too much of the organization. With your partner, design an overall layout plan given your number of tables and the activities planned for the reception, and that should get you started. And remember, serendipitous exchanges and lots of laughter take place at receptions: Yours will be no different, so don’t try to over-control.
Engagement Party/ies: The Big Day is nearly here! Enjoy yourselves and make a point to relax. Investing in the opportunity to breathe easy, let tensions subside and loosen up will truly make a difference in the days ahead.
As for the day of the ceremony, there are many fun and trendy ways to distribute name cards. Feel free to ask your floral designer, wedding coordinator or décor professional for ideas about how to involve your guests as much as possible in this simple but necessary organizational detail: Getting them interactive at the outset of the reception will get the party started that much faster!
FINALE!
Preparing Speeches & Toasts: Even if you are not planning a formal toast at your reception, you will want to spend time considering what you might want to say should the moment arise. During all the emotions of Your Special Day, you may find yourself nervous or overwhelmed or simply speechless... and a little preparation may go a long way. Official ‘ThankYou’ toasts are quite sentimental; if you anticipate a special lifelong friend will be in attendance, or you wish to verbalize appreciation to your parents for their support, doing so before your entire reception party will be extremely memorable. Many newlyweds improvise their toasts or announcements and others bring along handwritten notes. Either way, practicing in advance will help you feel that much more comfortable for this very momentous occasion.
Pick up Rings & Attire: Sometimes couples are so busy with all the excitement, these last-minute details suddenly slip their minds. Remember the basic must-have’s & must-do’s for your ceremony day, such as fetching the wedding rings from the jeweler & picking up the tuxes from the tailor!
The Day has arrived! Your Rehearsal, Ceremony, Reception and Honeymoon are finally here. For months, your focus has been on the aspects of planning and the logistics of this very important event. Now, you must leave those details to themselves and instead focus once again on the very heart of the matter. ...Your partner. Take time in the morning before your Rehearsal, as well as the morning before your Ceremony, to reflect on what it is that makes these coming moments miraculous for you. –You have finally found the love of your life, and here you are, about to gather with family & friends to proclaim it so. What is it in your partner’s eyes & heart & soul that at times moves you to tender laughter, or to tears of joy? What is it that yearns within you to stand beside this person through the years ahead, and ever re-commit to walking this journey of life together? Savor these moments. They are timeless, and it will nourish you years into the future to recall that you cherished Your Special Day to the fullest.
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The Same Love, Same Rights 速 Seattle LGBT Wedding Expo
W S M T H HE ER E RL AAD II EN I EA RR R YCL AL DUI EBS
Style, Sophistication and Elegance 820 Fourth Avenue, Seattle | www.TheRainierClub.com | 206.296.6901
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Sunday May 19, 2013
WHERT E H G EEN T RL EAM IE N N TBL E M E N N M I EA RR R YCGLE U
Style, Sophistication and Elegance 820 Fourth Avenue, Seattle | www.TheRainierClub.com | 206.296.6901
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YOUR EVENT - YOUR WAY START YOUR PLANNING NOW CORY DE ROOZE 206-676-3921 OR CDEROOZE@CPHOTELSEATTLE.COM 1113 6th Avenue Seattle, WA 98110 www.cphotelseattle.com