San Antonio Beacon April 2017 by The Beacon

How to Socialize Your Pet Pg 12

What Happens When You Die When asked the question, “What will we be after we die?” The human race has conjured up four answers. PG 2

Health Benefits of Laughter Funny movies, sitcoms, cute toddlers, and a good friend’s jokes can all offer one of the most powerful, natural stress relievers out there: laughter. PG 7

Fun Family Vacation Ideas Here are some family vacation suggestions that can make the trip more enjoyable for both generations PG 10

10 Ideas: Making Time for Your Spouse It’s not always an easy thing to do. 10 ideas can help intentionally make time for our spouse PG 13

April 2017

Serving San Antonio and the Surrounding Communities Since 2001

VOL.17 — NO. 4

WHY EASTER MATTERS

BY JOHANN CHRISTOPH ARNOLD

The Easter story is the most important story in the history of the world. And it does not belong only to Christians; it is for everyone. Easter celebrates Jesus’ resurrection from the dead three days after he was executed. What was his crime? He healed the sick, raised the dead, and preached the coming of God’s kingdom of justice, peace, and forgiveness. After Jesus was crucified his body was taken down from the cross and buried in a tomb, which was then sealed with a huge stone so that no one could steal the body. But on Easter morning an angel came and rolled the stone away. Jesus rose from the dead and appeared first to Mary Magdalene and then to his disciples. Like the disciples, many people today are afraid. Like the disciples, we also long for peace without knowing where to find it. The disciples were afraid. They did not want to be associated with Jesus, because he had just been condemned and executed. They had experienced this personally, and were terrified. So even though they knew that Jesus had risen, they met secretly behind locked doors. But Jesus suddenly appeared among them, saying, “Peace be with you.” Like the disciples, many people today are afraid. Even though, in most countries, we now have the freedom to believe in Jesus, we hide our faith behind closed doors. Like the disciples, we also long for peace without knowing where to find it. Jesus offers this peace to us, a peace that will take

away all our burdens and sins. May this peace excite us and fill us with hope and love. This peace is the answer to all our political and social problems. We live in a fractured society, where everybody is divided from everybody else, and simple joy in life is often squeezed out of us. This particularly affects children. When we take God away from them, and don’t let them come to Jesus, they are afraid.

The Easter story is the most important story in the history of the world. And it does not belong only to Christians; it is for everyone. The battle between good and evil has been raging since the beginning of time, but today it is impossible to ignore. Warfare is everywhere. In the impoverished nations of Africa there is war over water and other resources. Millions of people are dying because they do not have access to the basic necessities of life. Every day we hear of more atrocities occurring all over the world. Jesus came to end all suffering and human need. He loved us so much that he was willing to die for us. As the apostle John writes, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear.” This is the gift that Jesus offers us. When we celebrate Easter this year, let’s remember that Jesus was victorious over death and over fear. We can claim this same victory and receive his gift

of life and peace. Shortly before Easter 2015, my daughter Margrit died of cancer. Many times during her last days and hours my wife and I, together with her own family, gathered around her bed and thought of the Easter story. The following words of scripture, which my son Heinrich later put to music, became a trumpet call of victory for us: “Now we see through a glass dimly, but then face to face, now I know in part, just as I am also known, but then I shall be known, as I am known. Blessed be the God, father of our Jesus Christ who comforts us in trials. He will still deliver us! For I know that my Redeemer lives, And he shall stand at the end upon the earth. And though the worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God! Martha called Jesus to Lazarus, but yet did he die; when she heard he came, then she said unto her Lord, “If thou had’st been here my brother had not died.” Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life, whoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die!” Behold, I tell to you a mystery: We shall all be changed. At the last trumpet the dead shall all be raised, and we shall be changed, shall all be changed. Thanks be to God, death has been swallowed up, he gives the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ!” Yes, Jesus lives, and we can all live with him. http://www.plough.com/en/topics/culture/holidays/easter-readings/why-eastermatters

A P R I L 2017 — B E A CO N

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FAITH

What Happens When You Die - An Easter Special BY MAX LUCADO

Several years ago I received an urgent call see? Know or do? We so desire to know. Who to visit a dying man in the hospital. I didn’t in your life “just left?” When the breathing of know Peter well, but well enough to know your husband ceased, the beating heart in that he was paying a high price for his hard your womb stopped, when the beep of your living. Years of drugs and alcohol had pilgrandmother’s monitor became a flat-lined fered his system. Though he’d made peace tone, what happened in that final moment? with God through Christ, his liver was at And, what will happen to you in yours? conflict with his body. Barring the When his ex-wife phoned, she was stand- return of Christ, ing at his bedside. Peter, she explained, was you will have knocking at death’s door. Though I hurried, one…a last gasp, he entered it seconds before I arrived. The a final pulse. hospital room atmosphere had a …just hapYour lungs will pened… feel to it. The ex-wife was still stand- empty and blood will still. Since the moment ing by the bed. His hair was stroked back is inevitable, should we not prepare for it? from her touch. The imprint of a lipstick kiss When asked the question, “What will we was just below the knuckles on his left hand. be after we die?” The human race has conPerspiration beads sparkled on his forehead. jured up four answers. She saw me enter and looked up. With Nothing – we will decay and/or disinteher eyes and words she explained, “He just grate. Death is a dead end. Our works and left.” reputation might survive, not us. He silently slipped out. Exited. Departed. Ghosts – Phantoms of what we once He passed, not away, but on. Yet on to were. Pale as Edgar Winters’ beard. StrucProposed Advertisement for as September 2016 where? And in what form? To what place? In tured a morning mist. What will we be what manner? And, once there, what did he after we die? Spectres.

Or, hawks. Or, cows, or a car mechanic in Kokomo. Reincarnation rewards or punishes us according to our behavior. We come back to earth in another mortal body. Or, As part of the universe. Eternity absorbs us like a lake absorbs a storm. We return to what we were before we were what we are… we return to the cosmic consciousness of the universe. According to some folks, we bury the soul when we bury the body like a wrapping with a hot dog, never expecting to see either again. Other people propose that the spirit abandons the body as a butterfly escapes the cocoon. Christianity, on the other hand, posits a new startling, surprising idea. What you had before death, you’ll have after death, only better, much, much better. You will go to paradise: heaven, but not home. Then, upon the return of Christ, you will receive a spiritual body and inhabit a restored universe. This is the promise of God. This promise hinges on the resurrection of Christ. The Christian hope depends entirely upon the assumption that Jesus Christ died a physical death, vacated an actual grave and ascended into heaven where he, at this moment, reigns as head of the church. The Easter miracle, in other words, changed everything. It was Sunday morning after the Friday execution. The sky was dark. The disciples had scattered. And the Roman executioner was wondering about breakfast, or work, or his next day off. But he was not wondering about the fellow he had nailed to a cross and pierced with a spear. Jesus was dead and buried. Yesterday’s news, right? Wrong. God shook things up. “There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men. The angel said to the women, ‘Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay.’” (Matthew 28:2–6) Had such words never been spoken, had the body of Jesus decayed into dust within the borrowed tomb, you would not be reading this essay and we would not be discussing this promise. But the words were spoken and the promise was made more than once.

When asked the question, “What will we be after we die?” The human race has conjured up four answers.

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Jesus appeared to the women near the tomb and to the followers in the Upper Room. He appeared to the disciples on the road to Emmaus and his friends on the shore of Galilee. He spoke with them. He ate with them. They touched his body, they heard his words. They were convinced that Jesus was risen from the dead. And they drew this conclusion. His resurrection is the proof and promise of ours. What God did for him, he will do with us. When he rose from the dead, Jesus was the “first fruits” (I Corinthians 15:20,23). “First fruits” is the first taste of the harvest. The farmer can anticipate the nature of the crop by sampling the first crop. We can anticipate our own resurrection by trusting the empty tomb of Christ. Here is what is going to happen to you. Upon death, your spirit will immediately enter into the presence of God. You will enjoy conscious fellowship with the Father and with those who have gone before. We believe this to be true because of verses like this from the Apostle Paul: “If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far” (Philippians 1:21-23). Paul believed that his last breath on earth would be followed by his first glimpse of Christ in paradise. The same is true for you. Say goodbye to loved ones. Say hello to God. You will then enjoy fellowship with God and loved ones until the day when Christ returns. “…the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God…all who are…in their graves will hear His voice…they will come out…” (John 5: 25,28-29 ). He who created us, will collect us. “The Lord, who scattered his people, will gather them together” (Jeremiah 31:10 ). I’ve stood in cemeteries and attempted to imagine this moment. The road on which Denalyn and I take our walks is marked by a small, country cemetery. The headstones are faded beyond recognition. No dirt has been turned for a century. The few discernible names share a common last name. I assume that a family is buried there. It seems to be just one of the millions of burial spots around the planet. Yet, if these words are true, it will someday witness a miracle beyond words. The same God who shook the soil of Jerusalem will shake the soil of this simple cemetery. The grass will be pushed back from within. The caskets will open and continued on page 6

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A P R I L 2017 — B E A CO N

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ENTERTAINMENT

BILLY HURLEY III

BEACON RADIO INTERVIEW EXCERPTS Billy Hurley III Excerpts from 4/10/17 PGA Tour Golfer, Billy Hurley III, will be playing in the Valero Host Steve Teel Texas Open, April Steve@saBeacon.com 20-23, at TPC San Antonio. Beacon Radio’s Steve Teel recently talked to Billy about playing in the 2017 Masters Tournament at Augusta, his Naval Academy years watching just one TV program a year, quantitative economics, his faith in Jesus, and his dad’s life and death. Billy recently wrote a well-received open letter (ThePlayersTribune.com) to his father, who took his own life in 2015, and Billy

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talked about that as well with us. Billy won his first PGA tournament in 2016 (Quicken Loans National at the Congressional), just a year after that tragic event. Billy Hurley III and his wife, Heather, are involved in several charities around the world and with their US Navy background, they support our military at every tour stop. See BillyHurley3.com for more information. The entire interview airs on Beacon Radio, Saturday, April 15, at noon on AM630 The Word and AM630TheWord. com. Here are some edited excerpts. STEVE TEEL: What I’ve read that’s moved me the most in 2017 so far is the letter you wrote on The Player’s Tribune to your dad back in February. You wrote about missing four or five cuts on the mini-tour and your dad had encouraged you at that point. I know your dad was super important to you. If you could share that and the impact he has made on your life with his faith, Billy. BILLY HURLEY III: My dad brought faith to our family. Without him I don’t know that our family would have faith because he was kind of the first one to say, “Yes,” to Jesus, and bring that into our family. That was all before I was born. My dad was a good golfer in his own right. He played in college and I grew up with him playing golf together. The instance you mention with me missing a couple of cuts back in 2010. I had been back at golf for six months or so, since getting out of the Navy [note: Billy served out his five year commitment]. I was frustrated. I sure was. Missing cuts isn’t any fun. It’s still not today. He just kind of reminded me that none of the guys I was playing against took five years off so give yourself a break, you’re going the right way. I have a tendency to be very, very hard on myself and that was one of the things my dad combatted against in our conversations about golf and life. It was just the encouragement that I was still young in golf. It was one of those conversations you have a vivid memory of seven years later. ST: Listeners, you may have heard, it was national news on Good Morning America, CNN, that your dad went missing. You went, with your family’s backing, to share that your dad was missing. But can you tell us anything about that, Billy? BH3: It’s still the strangest deal when I think about it and look back. What snapped inside of my dad is going to be a mystery for eternity. I’ve said before, the only place we’ll get answers to my dad’s disappearance and ultimately suicide is in heaven and I’m not really sure by the time we get there that the answers will really matter.

ST: I like that. BH3: That may be one of the hardest things about it. My dad gets up and walks out of the house one day. Because of the national media someone spotted him in Texarkana and maybe ten days later he was found dead by suicide. The hardest part of suicide is you don’t have answers. Even if there was a note, there’s still so many questions, so many unanswered things and you just don’t get the answers. That makes it more difficult I think. I don’t pretend to understand it all. The thing that I’ve worked through in my head

and have been encouraged by other people is that suicide is a disease. Because no person in their right mind commits suicide so there’s something else going on that we didn’t know about. I have no idea what it was with my dad, no one has any idea in that sense. We just don’t know what was going on. If cancer took my dad then the story would be so much different, but because it was suicide there’s a tendency to focus just on the last two weeks of his life and not the 62 years of his life. So when we talk about The Players Tribune article, that was kind of the final piece for me. The whole story of his last two weeks had been told but the whole story of my interaction for 33 or 34 years of my life with my dad hadn’t been told. Because he was a great dad and he made a lot of sacrifices for me and for my family to be where I am today. ST: Listeners, Billy wrote in that Players Tribune letter, “Your legacy isn’t that you took your life, but that you brought faith into our family. I know one day I will see you again. I know this is not the end. I truly believe that.” Billy, I know it’s hard no matter what but could you tell us how your faith helped sustain you or helped you grow through this? BH3: We know that my dad wasn’t perfect. We know that we’re all not perfect, and that is a part of faith that is paramount to even needing a savior. For me, just having the solid faith background and having a good relationship with Jesus prior to everything happening almost two years ago. I can’t quantifiably say why it helps or why it is, I just know that if I didn’t have a relationship it seems like it would be really hard to get through or cross that bridge and want one because of the anger that comes with death and tragedy and suicide for sure. I think for me personally it’s been the slow moving snowball that gathers momentum through

years and years of trying to walk with the Lord and learn more and more and grow in deeper relationship with Him. Don’t get me wrong, I certainly don’t have it all figured out. But that piece of it helps me deal with it. Certainly, I was angry. Certainly, there’s questions that I’d love to have answers to. Certainly, there are things I wish were different, but the pragmatic part of me says, ‘Well, there’s nothing I can do about any of that, so what can I do something about and how am I going to do that going forward?’. I think that Jesus and my relationship with the Lord definitely helps you through that stuff. It helps you to realize there’s something bigger, a greater purpose. Something I kind of still struggle and wrestle with is the promise in Romans where it says all things work together for good, and you’re like, ‘Wait a second. Come on now. How does that work?” Certainly, my dad’s suicide was not good but I think that ultimately like The Players Tribune article, I can’t tell you the amount of feedback I heard from that and how many people that touched, so there was good that came out of that at the end of the day in a weird roundabout way. I certainly don’t wish anybody go through that experience though we know many more will go through it before the Lord returns. But it is just about trying to walk every day. ST: What does that relationship with the Lord look like in your career--where do you thrive? Some people dive into the Bible, for some people it’s prayer, some praise and worship, some serving. Is there one area where you sort of hang on to the most? BH3: I love praise and worship and it’s enjoyable to me. But the place where I find myself getting the most growth is in Bible Study and that dive into it. I’d like to say I do it more often than I do. ST: Me too, Billy. BH: In the periods in my life where I have been most intentional about it [Bible study], I have seen the most growth. One of the things I’ve been working on the most in the last five years is, I’m a very intellectual guy. The intellectual part of me is very easy for me to do the faith and to understand the tenets of the gospel. But trying to get my faith from head to my heart and really have it be a part of my soul and really have it be a core conviction belief as opposed to head knowledge. That’s what I’m always working for and trying to do more and more. ST: That is some strong stuff. Thanks, Billy, for sharing with us today. You’ve really blessed us today. BH3: Thanks, Steve, it was fun to be with you. Tune in Saturdays at noon to 1pm for Beacon Radio as Steve Teel talks to local and national difference makers on AM630 The Word.

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For GOD SO LOVED the world that he gave his one and only Son, that WHOEVER BELIEVES in him shall not perish but HAVE ETERNAL LIFE.

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The Word On Investing The Cross at Kerrville Phophetic Voice Of Our Time RCCG Salvation Center Focus on the Family Abortion Hurts God Heals Steve Brown ETC

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A P R I L 2017 — B E A CO N

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FINANCE

Are These Bad Habits Ruining Your Week? BY DARRYL LYONS

Have you developed bad habits to start your week? If you are like me, trying to run a multifaceted organization that is focused on improving the lives of all stakeholders, then you can quickly get pushed around by the busyness of a calendar. If we’re honest, we just don’t have time to prepare for the week. But let’s be shrewder about our days. In Proverbs 12:24, we are reminded that “The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be forced labor.” We may not like the sound of the scripture, but our own experience tells us that those who are diligent and thoughtful to their ways, tend to accomplish much more. You are starting your Monday off wrong if you do any one of the following four things: 1. The first thing you do is check emails If the first thing you do in the morning is check emails, you are not alone. Unfortunately, it’s wrong. A study by the Harvard Business review with Martin Seligman at the University of Pennsylvania found that negative news has a significant effect on mood. Absorbing a negative email right when you get out of bed impacts your start

time for the day. Most productive people 3. You go unprepared to meetings want fast start times and if you are one of Once you reviewed and adjusted your those people who aspire for success, then calendar, it’s time to prepare for each meetstart your day ing. Charles We may not like the sound of the scrip- Lindbergh said, off in prayer before you check is no ture, but our own experience tells us “There your outlook. Be shorter road to still and know defeat than by that those who are diligent and that He is Lord, entering a war thoughtful to their ways, tend to and wrap your with inadequate heart around the accomplish much more. preparation.” If Word of God we are in a batbefore you go into the email inbox. tle of powers and principalities, it makes 2. You react to whatever is on your sense to think through the week and idencalendar tify ways to be ready for the war. You can Every morning you should review your prepare by viewing LinkedIn profiles of calendar for that particular week. What meetings, you can role play important premeetings do I have? Have I been oversentations, or you can simply dress the booked? Can I cancel meetings that might appropriate part to match the people you not be urgent or important to free up think- will be connected with that week. Although ing time? What constructive activity could I preparation doesn’t always make for sucput in “dead space” to make it productive? cess, it does put the probabilities in your Do I have enough work out times sched- favor. uled? By asking yourself these questions, 4. You overlook cash flow you are taking control of your week and not After a month has flown by you are just allowing the week to take control of you. now realizing that you have overspent your Successful people form the habits of what budget. You also didn’t know that someone unsuccessful people fail to do.

hacked your account. Or, maybe you canceled an auto draft but it’s still going. What if your taxes didn’t get paid but you assumed they were completed. Every week, after prayer and peace, make sure you review your bank account transactions. Your cash flow is the heart monitor of the organization and overlooking the vital signs over a significant amount of time could be fatal. Check your bank weekly. Your first meeting every Monday should be with yourself. You should create a 1- to 2-hour recurring block of time to get your mind around what is in store for the week. This time should be uncompromised and consistent. To keep it consistent, create an agenda of what to accomplish in your Monday Meeting. I have personally been consistent with my morning meeting with myself for more than 10 years and can attest that it is the greatest use of time in the week. I hope this habit helps you, but never forget that despite our own arrogant planning, the Lord directs our path. https://hbr.org/2015/09/consumingnegative-news-can-make-you-less-effectiveat-work

What Happens When You Die continued from page 2

the bodies of these forgotten farmers will be called into the sky. Spirits will be reunited with bodies, glorified bodies. The resurrected Jesus is our example. His resurrection body bore a semblance to the crucified one; but only a semblance. Jesus’ disciples, who lived with him for three years, didn’t recognize him at first. Mary Magdalene (John 20:11-18), the Emmaus disciples (Luke 24:13-35), and the twelve (John 21:17), saw Jesus but didn’t see him as Jesus. He did familiar physical things such as walking and eating. He did things he had done, but appeared in a different form. Were I to look at photos of you as an infant, I would experience the same phenomena. Perhaps, upon study, I would spot a common trait: the shape of your mouth or angle of your eyes. But finding common traits would require focus. You’ve changed! But not nearly as much as you will; your new body will be so much better. ” …when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is” (1 John 3:2 ). “We shall be like him.” Let the amputees and infected, bed-ridden, and anemic put

themselves to sleep with the promise, “We shall be like him.” Let the wheel-chair bound and atrophied take this promise to heart. “We shall be like him.” We shall graduate from this version to his likeness. We shall enjoy a body, like his made for heaven and earth. Let this hope for tomorrow bring strength to today. Some of you indwell such road-weary bodies: knees ache, eyes dim, skin sags. Others of you exited the womb on an uphill ride. While I have no easy answers for your struggle, I invite… no, I implore you to stand with me on the promise of Paul. “So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18 ). ©Max Lucado, March 22, 2016

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A P R I L 2 0 1 7 — B E A CO N

The Health Benefits of Laughter BY MADELINE R. VANN

Funny movies, sitcoms, cute toddlers, and a good friend’s jokes can all offer one of the most powerful, natural stress relievers out there: laughter. “I think one of the best things is that laughter increases your sense of humor,” says Lynda Tourloukis, a certified laughter teacher based in Park Ridge, Ill. A motivational speaker and life coach, Tourloukis says she became interested in the healing benefits of laughter after she and her husband spent a weekend chuckling and guffawing at a seminar offered by the Humor Project, an organization that focuses on “the positive power of humor.” Now she trains other laughter teachers and has become a personal laughter advocate. Health Boosts From a Good Laugh The benefits of a good laugh are wideranging and can include protection from emotional issues like depression and improving the health of your heart. Here’s what experts know about the health benefits of laughter: Mental health benefits. Mental health benefits. Although you probably can’t laugh off depression, one of the many benefits of laughter and a sense of humor is that they buffer you against the negatives of life that could lead to depression. As an added bonus, research shows that people who use humor to fight stress also feel less lonely and more positive about themselves. And one recent study found that humor therapy was as effective as widely used antipsychotic drugs — minus the side effects — in managing agitation in patients with dementia. Physical benefits. Although we can’t yet say that a certain number of laughs every day will keep the doctor away, studies show that people who say they laugh a lot also tend to be in good health and generally feel well. Laughter is also one of the most commonly used complementary therapies among cancer patients, who find that one of the benefits of laughter is an improved quality of life. Heart health benefits. Laughter could be healthy for your heart, too. Some research shows that when you laugh, there is an increase in oxygen-rich blood flow in your body, possibly due to the release of endorphins, which create a chemical rush

that counters negative feelings and stress. Activities that increase endorphins include a good workout and listening to music you love, and laughter deserves its place on the list with these other stress busters. Building Laughter Into Your Life Loving the benefits of laughter but don’t feel like laughing? Sometimes you have to make a conscious effort to laugh. If you’re facing tough times such as a tight budget, work stress, or an illness like cancer, it may help to learn techniques to bring the benefits of laughter into your life. You can try the old stand-by recommendations: • Rent a funny movie, read a funny book, or watch a funny sitcom. • Spend time with an amusing buddy. • Look on the light side: Go places that help you remember good times that have made you laugh in the past. Or you can join the “laughter movement” to learn about the benefits of laughter while fighting stress: Practice laughter yoga. This specialized combination of yoga breathing techniques and exhalation creates a self-induced “laugh” that provides all the benefits of laughter rooted in humor. You can include this practice in your day by adding a little “ha ha ha” when you shake hands or introduce yourself — to fellow laughter fans, of course! Check out Laughter Yoga International for more information. Find a laughter group. “It’s always my recommendation to get together with other people to laugh. It’s a little hard to laugh alone, unless you have practiced it,” Tourloukis says. At Laughter Yoga International you can search over 6,000 social laughter clubs around the world to find one closest to you. Have a “woohoo!” Tourloukis hosts a free daily laughter call that is only 20 minutes long and ends with a laugh-inducing “woohoo!” But she says anytime you look at the clock, if it’s 20 minutes past the hour, your own “Woohoo!” will help bring a smile to your face. http://www.everydayhealth.com/womens-health/health-benefits-of-laughter.aspx

Student Writers Program The Beacon has an exciting new program to watch out for… Our Student Writers Initiative. The young people in the community are getting out in the community and sharing their stories of service, as well as spotlighting different ministries and organizations in San Antonio and the surrounding areas.

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ICE CREAM AND STONEHENGE by KIRK FREEMAN, Pastor CrossBridge Community Church

It was barely afternoon, just past 12:00 p.m., and my wife and I were eating ice cream down at the Pearl. We have this rule that we shouldn’t eat ice cream in the morning. While it seems to me that this rule wastes about one third of potential time one can eat ice cream in a given day, Debbie knows I need this “gentle” accountability. We were at our favorite ice cream place called, Lick. The scoops are small, but intensely flavorful and always unique. One other couple, who apparently have the same caloric rule, are in line with us. They’re visiting from England and live near Wiltshire, just about 20 minutes from Stonehenge, the massive pre-historic stone monument. They’re in the U.S. for just a few days and have just returned from visiting the San Jose Mission and are eager to share with us their impressions (they were impressed). We inevitably fall into a conversation comparing the two stone constructions--the size of Stonehenge, the precision of San Jose. At some point the man says, “Seems like people are always building something.”

He’s right. People are always building • Pmoney (Okay, okay, so I couldn’t something. Each of us is building the best find a ‘P’ word for money.) possible life we can; each seeking to have a Often we use these Six to create the fulfilling and meaningful existence. Like the most meaningful life possible and when we ancient builders of Stonehenge or the misfeel the lack of one or more of these, we sionaries of San direct our efforts Jose, we generally What’s more, the pain of our past can be to getting more. build with the It’s easy for much materials around resolved in a way that it no longer has of life to swirl us. We take influence in our present and future. around these Six what’s available P’s. to us and attempt (Think about that for a moment.) Building with to arrange them the Six P’s is comto create a significant life. Often we use mon and cross cultural. It’s also incredibly building blocks which I refer to as the Six unreliable. Each one of the Six P’s depends P’s: upon variables we don’t directly control. The • Pain (Unresolved hurt generally feelings of people often change. The ecoplays an active role in our present nomic forces that influence money and lives.) power are much larger than us. Wanting to • Power (Influence in the workplace escape the pain of our past, ironically, often or among others.) leads us into replicating or perpetuating it. • Pleasure (Generally physical.) The bottom line: Building our life on the Six • Possessions (Stuff.) P’s makes us vulnerable. Inevitably, one or • Praise of people (We often measure more these Issue blocks crumbles and we feel Juneof2016 our worth by the responses of oththe loss--often in a devastating way. ers.) The Bible makes the claim that there’s

another way to building our lives; a more reliable building material. To be sure, we still utilize most of the Six P’s, but our identity, sense of purpose and our sense of belonging aren’t resting on them. When we build on these other blocks, we’re no longer vulnerable. What’s more, the pain of our past can be resolved in a way that it no longer has influence in our present and future. (Think about that for a moment.) The foundation for building a life that’s safe from the uncontrollable variables of the Six P’s, is to enter in to a right relationship with God. Not one dictated by tradition and rules, but a deeply personal one. To give us a picture of the relationship God wants with us, the Apostle John says, “Oh how great is Father God’s love for us, that he should call us his children. And that is precisely what we are!” Through the death and resurrection of Jesus, God reconciles us to himself. He invites us into a relationship with him where he supernaturally establishes our sense of identity, purpose and belonging. When he does, life is totally different in a wonderful way!

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Why Jesus Was Hated and Put to Death BY RANDY ALCORN

I’ve shared before my appreciation for see the Jewish leaders increasingly hostile pastor and writer Kevin DeYoung’s blog, as toward Jesus. Although the fear of the well as for his books, including The Hole in crowds stays their hand for awhile, they still Our Holiness, What Does the Bible Really try to trap Jesus and plot his destruction Teach about Homosexuality?, and his chil(8:11; 11:18; 12:12; 12:13; 14:1: 15:3, 11). There dren’s book The Biggest Story. is a lot the Jewish leaders don’t like about With Good Friday and Easter upon us, Jesus, but their most intense, murderous Kevin recently posted an answer to the fury is directed toward him because he question, “Why did they hate Jesus?” It’s believes “I am [the Christ, the Son of the common to hear people focus solely on the Blessed], and you will see the Son of Man compassion and love of Jesus, and neglect seated at the right hand of Power, and comthe other parts of His character, including ing with the clouds of heaven” (14:62). His holiness and The four Goswrath, soverpels, we When asked the question, “What will mightasexpect, eignty and lordship. Jesus was we be after we die?” The human race emphasize difindeed a friend ferent aspects of has conjured up four answers. of sinners, but the Jewish oppoHe was crucified sition. Luke, for for much more than that. The gentle, cominstance, makes more of Jesus’ identification passionate Jesus is also the Jesus who drove with the society’s cast-offs as an issue for the merchant-thieves from the Temple and the Jewish leaders, while John makes more spoke condemnation against self-righteous of Jesus’ unique status as God’s equal. But religious leaders. Were Jesus as meek and the basic outline is consistent in all four mild and utterly tolerant as many think, He accounts. As Jesus’s reputation as a healer never would have been crucified. But His and miracle worker spreads, the crowds less popular qualities so outraged people come to him in larger and larger numbers, that they nailed Him to a cross. prompting the elites to despise him more In particular what bothered the religious and more. As a general rule, Jesus was popleaders was His bold claims about His iden- ular with the masses (the exception being in tity, which they considered to be blashis hometown of Nazareth), and as his popphemy: He asserted Himself as God’s only ularity increased with the crowds, so did the Son, one with the Father, having come down opposition from the Jewish leaders. from Heaven and destined to rule the uniThe Jewish leaders disliked, and eventuverse as King, thus making Himself equal ally grew to hate, Jesus for many reasons. with God. Mark 15:3 says the chief priests “accused Here’s what Kevin has to say: him of many things.” They were angry with Why Did They Hate Jesus? him for upsetting their traditions and some It is sometimes said that Jesus was killed of their scruples about the law. They looked on account of His inclusion and tolerance, down on him for eating with sinners and that the Jews hated him for hanging out associating with those deemed unclean or with sinners and tax collectors. This is the unworthy. But most of all, they hated Jesus sort of sentiment which has a bit of truth to because he claimed to be from God, and as it, but only a tiny bit. No doubt, Jesus upset time went on, dared to make himself equal many of the Jewish leaders because he to God. extended fellowship and mercy beyond That’s why they hated him; that’s why their constricted boundaries. But it is misthe crowds turn on him; that’s why Jesus leading to suggest that Jesus was hated for was put to death. The Jewish leaders could simply being too doggone loving, as if his not recognize Christ’s divine authority and inspiring tolerance were the cause of his identity. Jealousy was no doubt part of it enemies’ implacable intolerance. (Matt. 27:18). But deeper than that, they Take Mark’s Gospel, for example simply did not have the eyes to see or the (because it’s the one Gospel I’ve preached faith to believe that Jesus was the Christ, all the way through). By my reckoning, Jesus the Son of the living God. That’s why in all is opposed once for eating with sinners four gospels, when the opposition against (2:16), once for upsetting stereotypes about him reaches its climax, Jesus is not charged him in his hometown (6:3), a few times for with being too welcoming to outsiders, but violating Jewish scruples about the law with being a false king, a false prophet, and (2:24; 3:6; 7:5); and several times for “blasa false Messiah (Matt. 26:57-68; Mark 14:53pheming” or for claiming too much author- 65; Luke 22:66-71; and less clearly in John ity for himself (2:7; 3:22; 11:27-28; 14:53-64; 18:9-24). They killed Jesus because they 15:29-32, 39). As Mark’s Gospel unfolds, we thought he was continued on page 14

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FAMILY

Fun Family Vacation Ideas BY LAWRENCE KUTNER, PH.D.

Planning a family vacation poses some interesting challenges. Your 4-year-old might be delighted to spend three days exploring the wonders of a tacky Santa’s Village, whereas you develop a migraine after a couple of hours. You may relish the thought of spending a day at an art museum; your child would last an hour before collapsing in a puddle of boredom. Here are some family vacation suggestions that can make the trip more enjoyable for both generations: Break up the day. Remember that children are often most excited by simple and familiar pleasures. Spend two hours playing miniature golf if that’s something your child likes, even if there’s a similar course close to your home. Build a small sand castle with a plastic bucket and shovel. Don’t focus on elaborate adventures. Keep sightseeing trips short. A twohour cruise on a harbor will be far more interesting to a young child than an all-day bus tour. 1/4Budget pagefor adtime apart. Have your hotel

arrange for a babysitter for an evening or two so that you can get some adults-only time. Don’t feel that you have to do something exotic or dramatic; sometimes what you really need is a few quiet hours. Keep your schedule loose. Young children operate on their own time schedules. If your child’s cranky in the afternoon, be willing to scrap your prearranged plans so that he (and perhaps you) can take a nap. Travel when the kids are tired. This varies from child to child. Some young children can be plopped down in a car or an airplane at 6 am and stay asleep for hours. Others wake up instantly. You may find that the best time for driving is during an afternoon nap — your child’s, not yours! Try staying in one location for the whole vacation. This reduces the number of new things your child has to adapt to, which lowers your stress level as well. Allow lots of extra time at airports. These days, traveling by air can make a family vacation very stressful, especially for young children. The frustration of a missed

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connection increases exponentially with handle things the same way. every child who’s with you. Try to follow these tips without stressing Monitor your own emotions and atti- too much on creating a perfect experience tude. Our children reflect our feelings in for all. Some days will be better for you and their own emotions. If we become upset, others better for your child. That’s just the Proposed Advertisement August 2016 they’ll become upset. If we’re laid back in wayfor things work on a family vacation. the face of a problem, they’re more likely to

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FAITH

A SIMPLE WAY TO PRAY EVERY DAY BY NICK AUFENKAMP

Of all the things Martin Luther is known phones or schedules. The problem is with for, among the foremost is his dedication to our hearts. So, if we really want to grow in prayer. He is famous for commenting, “I our prayer life, we must take aim at somehave so much to do that I shall spend the thing much deeper than surface distracfirst three hours in prayer.” He wasn’t exagtions: our most inward affections and gerating, either. Many of his friends and stu- desires. dents could attest that he would spend sevAnd this is where the Lord’s Prayer is eral hours on his knees in fervent, daily most helpful. prayer — often at seemingly inopportune How to Pray as Jesus Taught Us times in the middle of the day. First, Luther recommends simply to pray At one point, Luther’s barber and longthrough the prayer once, as recorded in the time friend, Peter Beskendorf, asked if he Gospel of Matthew (Matthew 6:9–13). He would teach him how to pray. Luther then says to go back through the prayer and responded by writing Beskendorf a letter pray each petition individually: which he called, “A Simple Way to Pray.” Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your Luther’s letter is a gourmet buffet for all name. Christians who hunger for more rich and Your kingdom come, your will be done, satisfying prayerfulness. on earth as it is in heaven. While I would encourage anyone to Give us this day our daily bread, enjoy the full buffet, for now I will simply And forgive us our debts, provide the first course: a simple way to As we also have forgiven our debtors. pray by using the Lord’s Prayer. And lead us not into temptation, but Prone to Wander in Every Age deliver us from evil. But why should we go to Luther for help For yours is the kingdom and the power praying in the twenty-first century in the and the glory forever. first place? Most of our modern problems Amen. with prayer are born of distraction: email Luther exhorts us to let each petition alerts, Facebook notifications, constantly guide our prayer. So, after praying, “Our revolving media. Father in heaven, How can Luther hallowed be your It is strangely encouraging to be help us with ” we may reminded that our temptation toward name, these sorts of continue to pray, problems? distraction from prayer for the sake of “Yes, Father, it is In fact, our great desire seemingly “more productive” tasks is that your name Luther directly approaches this would be feared not unique to the digital age. very obstacle in and revered for his letter. Hear who you are: our how his words resonate with your own difGod, our Creator, the Holy One who, in ficulties with prayer: unthinkable mercy, gave your only begotten Guard yourself carefully against those Son to save us from your wrath upon our false, deluding ideas which tell you, “Wait a sin.” little while. I will pray in an hour; first I We can then move to the next petition, must attend to this or that.” Such thoughts “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on get you away from prayer into other affairs earth as it is in heaven,” and pray, “We know which so hold your attention and involve that Jesus is reigning right now with authoryou that nothing comes of prayer for that ity over all things, and yet we still experiday. . . . ence much brokenness here on earth. We must be careful not to break the Father, bring your kingdom in greater meahabit of true prayer and imagine other sure today beginning in my own heart and works to be necessary which, after all, are pouring out to my home, community, city, nothing of the kind. nation, and to the ends of the earth. It is strangely encouraging to be Eventually, we move through each petireminded that our temptation toward distion until we’ve reached the “Amen.” We traction from prayer for the sake of seemmight be inclined to think of the Amen as ingly “more productive” tasks is not unique the simplest, least significant part of the to the digital age. The problem of our Lord’s Prayer. However, Luther does not disprayerlessness is not simply with our smart- miss it so continued on page 15

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PETS

How to Socialize Your Pet BY MARIE SUSZYNSKI

Veterinarians can tell if an animal has been socialized the moment they walk into an exam room. “Some animals come bounding up and are happy to see me and everyone in the waiting room,” says Bonnie V. Beaver, DVM, professor in the department of small animal clinical sciences at Texas A&M University in College Station, and past president of the American Veterinary Medical Association. “Others hide behind their owner and don’t want to come out. Life is stressful for them.” And socialization helps make the difference. When puppies and kittens are introduced to a variety of people, other animals, and environments during the first several weeks of life, they tend to do better, and have less stress and fewer problems later on. Think about everything your pet will be exposed to during life: different people, animals, places, situations, cars, noises, and smells. When they’re puppies or kittens, they take new experiences with stride. But as they get older they quickly start to become nervous and scared when confronted with something or someone new. Why Socialize Your Pet? Animals are preprogrammed to become fearful of people and things that aren’t part of their everyday life so they react appropriately when they are in danger. But you can introduce a new dog or new cat to a variety of situations when it’s very young so it doesn’t live its life afraid of straying from its neighborhood or meeting new people. When you do, your pet will be more laid back and can enjoy life. Pets are also safer once they’re socialized because they’re less

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likely to react in a fearful or aggressive way when they’re faced with something new. How To Socialize Your Pet The key to socializing dogs and cats is to start very young and to introduce your new dog or new cat to as many different things as you can. Here’s what to do: Start at a few weeks of age. Puppies and kittens need to be socialized before they are 16 weeks old. “We have a tendency to isolate them at that time and expect that at a year we’ll get them used to cars and different environments,” Dr. Beaver says. The ideal time for this kind of pet training is between 3 and 12 weeks of age. The window of opportunity to socialize your pet usually closes around 18 weeks. For kittens it may be even younger, Beaver says. Unfortunately, when you adopt an adult dog you’ve missed the opportunity to socialize. But even adult dogs can get used to individuals they see on a regular basis, Beaver says. Set goals. Think about who and what a puppy will be around when it gets older and make a long list the things your pet needs to be socialized to. That means children, adults, men, women, crying babies, people of different nationalities, crowds, people wearing hats, and people not wearing hats, Beaver says. The wider the variety of people you can expose your puppy or kitten to, the better. Include different environments. Have your puppy walk on grass, concrete, through buildings like pet stores, on busy streets, quiet streets, areas with other animals — and near cars, trucks, buses, and trains. You can even take your dog for rides in the car through different areas of town, through fast-

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food drive-thrus, and through car washes. This is also the time to get your dog used to be handled during grooming. Kittens can also be socialized by having people come to your house or by bringing your kitten to other people’s houses, although it’s better to visit someone who doesn’t already have a cat. Socialization Tips When you’re ready to begin socializing your dog or cat, keep in mind these tips for success: Do it daily. Ideally, you should try to socialize your pet every day during the first 16 weeks. When strangers approach, let them pet your dog. Get them used to carriers. If you want your kitten to grow into a cat who doesn’t mind going to the vet, leave its carrier out for playtime. Carry the kitten from one side of the house to the other and give your cat treats in the carrier, Beaver says. Reward your pet. Make your puppy or kitten feel good about new things by praising it during socialization and giving it small treats (break up a normal size treat into small pieces so your pet doesn’t get too many calories).

Give it about 75 minutes. Puppies and kittens are constantly learning; they become socialized to new things within 75 minutes of being exposed to them, Beaver says. Be gentle. It’s important to keep a close eye on your pet’s reaction to new things. Don’t force it if a situation seems too overwhelming and scary for your pet. Your pet may need to be exposed to that particular thing more gradually. Go to kindergarten. If your dog hasn’t received all of its vaccinations, consider signing up for puppy socialization classes at an animal hospital, Beaver says. It’s a safe environment for your dog to be in because it will be surrounded by well-vaccinated dogs, she says. The classes are designed to introduce your pet to a variety of sights and sounds and can even help with obedience training. Go for pet training. You can socialize your pet on your own, but if you need help outside of a puppy kindergarten class, consider hiring a pet trainer. Socializing dogs and cats this way ensures that they’re better adjusted as adults and may be easier to train because they’re less distracted by fear, Beaver says.

Northside Church of Christ

Seeking Children’s Ministry Associate Do you have a passionate heart for teaching and working with children and their parents? Do you communicate well with others and have a heart for Jesus? The Northside Children’s Ministry is seeking a person with excellent interpersonal and organizational skills to assist with our dynamic ministry for approximately 350 children, newborn through 5th grade. This is a full-time, paid position, which includes weekday clerical office hours in addition to being present on Sundays/Wednesdays to teach or supervise as our children are learning God’s word. Are you interested in coming alongside our Children’s Minister as our program continues to grow? If you would like to know more about this opportunity, you may email your questions, or submit your resume with references, to: childrenscommittee@nsoc.org.

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10 IDEAS: MAKING TIME FOR YOUR SPOUSE