Nature | Issue 04

vol.77 issue.04

the nature issue

contents weekly content 4. Letters 6. News 1 9 . V U WS A 3 2 . C r e at i v e 44. Arts 5 1 . O d d s an d e n d s

columns 1 6 . R a m b l i n g s o f a F all e n H ac k 17. The Intrepid VC Guilford 1 8 . B e i n g W e ll 1 8 . M Ä o r i M at t e r s 3 8 . S p o r t s B an t e r w i t h S a m m y P 3 9 . T h e S w e e t S coo p 3 9 . C on s p i r ac y C o r n e r 4 0 . S h i r t an d S w e e t w i t h E l e ano r M e r t on 4 1 . T h e B on e Z on e w i t h C u p i e H oo d w i n k 4 2 . H i s t o r y T ha t H a s n ’ t H a p p e n e d Y e t 42. Weird Internet Shit

features 14. Interview with the Mayor 1 5 . I n t e r v i e w w i t h R u s s e l N o r m an 2 0 . S o C r az y I t M i g h t J u s t W o r k 2 1 . A - P at h e t i c M i n d s e t 2 2 . P a y i n g G ol d t o b e G r e e n 2 4 . B la m e I t on t h e S un s h i n e 2 6 . W ha t K i n d o f E nv i r on m e n t al i s t A r e Y ou ?

28. Gene Genie 30. Build a Bridge 3 6 . I n t e r v i e w w i t h H oll y W al k e r 3 7 . P lo t t i n g P lan t s

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the nature issue

You can’t beat Wellington on a good day.

W

hy is this our city’s most overused phrase? Partly because it’s true – the hills and harbour of Wellington are pretty fucking stunning. Partly it’s because the weather is so shit here, a sunny day is a rare gift. Mostly, though, it’s because people are addicted to talking about the weather. “How bout this weather?” is the classic thing to say to people when you’ve got nothing else to say. Unlike most things in life, the weather (and more broadly nature) is common to everybody. Because of this, looking after the Earth should be our most pressing concern. But the discussions we have about nature and the horrific ways we sometimes treat it suggest that we don’t care.

In this issue, we wanted to steer away from arguments about whether global warming is happening and whether we are the cause. It is, and we are. We aren’t going to waste your time detailing hot-air conspiracies on climate science. If you don’t believe it, it’s simple: we put gases into the air. Those gases make it harder for heat from the Sun to exit our atmosphere. In turn, the Earth heats up. Jog on.

But we did want to be constructive. Too often, our negativity about our past actions turns us off. We don’t want to feel guilty; we just want to know what we can do to help. So we asked every major political party to tell us what they would do to improve our environment. Some of the responses are good. Some made us despair.

Jamie Neikrie investigates some bolder and more controversial ways to put the brakes on climate change. Similarly, Andrew Mahoney argues that science must be trusted – by both climate-

change deniers and anti-GE campaigners alike.

Beyond policy though, we also wanted to explore nature at a personal level. We know global warming is a thing that we have done, but why do we not do anything about it? Steph Trengrove claims it’s apathy. Madeleine Foreman gives us more credit. She argues that although we might want to be eco-warriors, living the kale-infused vegan experience costs dollars that students don’t have.

The environment is more than just green leaves and trees.

Alexandra Hollis this week discusses the variety of ways that weather affects our moods, and finds that it has far more of an influence over our lives than we’d think.

Finally, we sought in this issue to capture some of the physical beauty of nature. We all have that feeling sometimes when you look outside your window or make it to some lookout somewhere. It is that sudden rush of satisfaction that comes from viewing a stunning landscape. It can instantly brighten your day.

Our creative section attempts to showcase a bit of that this week.

At the end of the day, there are three reasons to be cautiously optimistic about our future with the environment. We should be comforted by the amazing ability of humans to overcome obstacles: to harness technology to make our lives better. And secondly, we are the generation that will bring about those changes. More so than any other generation, we talk and argue and care about the environment. Finally, it’s because the alternative is pretty fucking bleak. It’s unhealthy to wake up every day gratuitously sad about our future. So don’t be.

Love ,

Du ncan & Cam

editor@salient.org.nz

3

LETTER of the

WEEK

CAN’T PLEASE THEM ALL Dear Salient, I’m 21 and only a second year, all my friends at Vic have finished or just about to finish Uni and when I first arrived to Vic and came across the Salient magazine, I don’t know why, but all my friends just told me that the Salient was the ‘crappy’, ‘shitty’ free magazine that the Uni printed out every week. Heck in this weeks edition of the Salient (vol. 77-issue 3) in the letters section people have gone out of their way to bag the magazine out. So last year when I started my freshman year I never picked up or bothered to read the Salient cause according to my friends it was just utter rubbish so I figured why bother at all? But then one day I had time to kill before a lecture and decided “fuck reading over notes (which I’m meant to be doing), I’ll give Salient a go” and you know what? I’ve read every issue ever since.

It’s an enjoyable magazine. I enjoy the banter, the articles and the puzzles at the back, to kill time during the boring lectures.

To all the haters: Fuck you. Simply put. F-U-C-K you It’s a free magazine run by students. I could never balance Uni work, social life, sport and running a magazine week in, week out. So I say well done to all who have had a hand in running this magazine. It may not be the best in the world however for what it is, it does a pretty fine job.

Loud and proud Salient reader/Supporter Alejandro Barrientos

IT WAS PROBABLY A MAN I was in the Women’s room this morning using the telephone to make an appointment when I noticed the rather large fridge and I decided to open it!

My god - what a mistake. The fridge just stinks with smelly stagnant water at the bot-

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the nature issue

Dear Salient Offering a free coffee from Vic Books for the best letter is obviously an attempt to exclude tea loving conservatives from your publications.

This leaves a very bitter taste in my mouth. Please offer a tea prize to finally end the coffee lobbyists choke hold on your magazine.

Regards The Earl of Grey

SPOILER ALERT: FRANK DIES Dear/ Salient I loved the issue last week. Lots of hubub and chitter chatter going around here which is quite fantastic too see. Although some-days I think we all need a unification of chillness to settle our nerves. That’s why I am proposing we start a weekly tradition of watching House of Cards every 8pm on Wednesdays before bed-time.

Cheers, Spuds

tom of it and milk cartons that have clearly been there since Adam was a Cowboy!

Also someone has left a plate of something on a table next to the fridge (I was too scared to open it up) with a sign stating that whatever was underneath was disgusting!!

Please ladies can we get that bloody disgusting fridge which does not work removed ASAP. The fridge is a health hazzard as is the contents inside!

Signed ‘Smelly’

YEA FUCK YOU VINCENT

SHEEEEIIIIT Dear shitlient, Your magazine is shit. Covers are shit. Editorials are shit. Columns and features are shit. News is shit. Arts are shit. Creative section is shit. Interviews are shit. Comics and puzzles are shit. Letters are okay.

Shit, Shit

Dear Salient, Nothing makes my Monday mornings better than picking up an edition of Salient before walking into my POLS111 lecture.

Unlike the same cereal I’ve had everyday since moving into my hall, it provides for a refreshing start. Sorry Vincent, the writing in Salient is fantastic and if you disagree, I would suggest that you send in your own CV. Love, Dedicated-reader

Are you angry, elated or apathetic about Salient? Send us a letter of less than 250 words to editor@salient. org.nz. Pseudonyms are fine, but all letters must include your real name, address and telephone number. These will not be printed. Letters will not be corrected for spelling or grammar.

The Editors reserve the right to edit, abridge or decline any letters.

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5

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MUSIC TO VIC’S EARS MASSEY FALLS FLAT IN A MAJOR CHANGE.

NEWS NOT SO WISE COUNCIL VUWSA CALLS ON UNI TO REJECT COUNCIL REFORMS

by Sofia Roberts

V

UWSA has called on the University to reject outright a bill proposing radical changes to university governance.

Steven Joyce’s Education Amendment Bill would cut down university councils to no more than 12 members, and remove current requirements for student and staff representation.

However, the Bill would maintain the same number of government-appointed members on councils.

VUWSA Academic Vice-President Rāwinia Thompson said the changes would make maintaining student representation “incredibly difficult”, and said it was “highly likely students would lose our second seat on the Council.”

“No university supports the proposed changes; Auckland and Otago Universities have outright rejected the proposed changes.

VUWSA hopes that, in coming months, Victoria University will follow the lead of Auckland and Otago and reject the changes outright,” Thompson said.

Music student and political aficionado Benjamin Beckers slammed the proposed changes.

“It’s not students who get to choose whether or not they’re represented on councils; it’s the prerogative of the councils themselves – councils who are now stuffed full of ministry lackeys serving a government who time and time again has proven its commitment to steamrolling our education system.”

The Bill will be open for public submissions until 30 April.

VUWSA will be making a written submission, and hopes to make an oral submission also.

Victoria’s Chancellor Ian McKinnon is yet to make formal comment on the issue, but is set to comment in next week’s issue of Salient.

by Elise Munden

Y

ears of student complaints and disagreement between three different tertiary institutions may be resolved by a new proposal from the New Zealand School of Music (NZSM).

Massey and Victoria, which jointly manage NZSM, are considering a proposal under which future NZSM courses would only be administered by Victoria.

Students would be able to complete their studies under their current regulations and have their degree conferred jointly by both universities.

Victoria plans to offer programmes similar to those offered currently through NZSM for those enrolling from 2015. Massey will develop a new programme in the area of popular music practice, technology, and business-based music education.

Until now, Music students based in Wellington have been taught by the NZSM, which is administered by both Victoria and Massey University. The two universities had entirely separate Music courses prior to their merging in 2006.

This three-way relationship has meant that Music students must travel frequently between the Mount Cook and Kelburn campuses, and that they are often confused as to which student association represents them.

This arrangement has also meant that committees from Victoria and Massey must come to consensus before action can be taken to adjust any Music courses. This process can take longer than six months.

NZSM student representative Stephen Clothier said that the proposed changes “will remove a lot of unnecessary bureaucracy and convolution from the system.”

However, Clothier is concerned about the changes. He told Salient: “I can’t help but wonder how dividing these programmes again will affect those wishing to study, for example, music technology and classical composition, which is possible under the current system but might become problematic if those programmes are administered through different universities.”

It is unclear how this process will be set in motion. In 2006, government funds were specifically allocated to the building of new music facilities for the NZSM. This money was later withdrawn. The current split campus between Mount Cook and Kelburn was only meant to be temporary until the funds were reinstated. This never eventuated.

The Kelburn campus cannot currently host all Music students, meaning that the Massey classrooms will still need to be leased by Victoria in the foreseeable future. There have been suggestions of building new Music rooms at Kelburn, reusing old Science lecture theatres, or creating a completely new Music campus at a different location.

The universities are seeking student and staff feedback on the proposal, and fora will be held at both Massey and Victoria campuses, before a decision is made by both university councils later in the year.

The Victoria forum will take place from 10.30–11.30 am on Wednesday 26 March in Room MS209.

editor@salient.org.nz

7

NEWS

BUS WANKERS

by Sophie Boot

TRIP WITHIN WELLINGTON CBD WILL GO FROM $2 TO $2.50 ON OCTOBER 1ST SNAPPER FARES WILL RISE 1 PER CENT

S

tudents in Dunedin are paying less for buses, but the Wellington City Council hasn’t budged on fairer fares for Wellington students.

A 25 per cent discount for students at the University of Otago and Otago Polytechnic has resulted in a “surge” of more than 800 students using the city’s public bus service every day.

18,223 student trips were recorded in the first 22 days of the discount trial, and Otago Regional Councillor Michael Deaker said patronage “appears to be stabilising at that level.”

The trial is being run by the Council along with the student associations at the University of Otago and Otago Polytechnic.

OUSA President Ruby Sycamore-Smith said she was very happy with the numbers of students using the service.

In 2013, VUWSA campaigned on ‘Fairer Fares’ for Victoria students, but was stymied by the Greater Wellington Regional Council.

The latest Draft Regional Public Transport Plan, approved by the Council on 19 March, again contained no tertiary concessions.

VUWSA Welfare Vice-President Rick Zwaan told Salient that the Fairer Fares campaign was “still one of our core priorities”, and the organisation was “working through the most effective mechanisms” to get the fares.

Councillors voted in February this year to raise bus and train fares from 1 October. Despite ever-decreasing patronage, fare revenue is expected to rise by 3 per cent annually.

The public will be asked to provide feedback on the draft plan between 4 April and 9 May, and the final version is expected to take effect from 24 July.

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25% DISCOUNT

10% TRIPS

BUS TRIPS 18,223

FARES

8%

25 PER CENT DISCOUNT FOR OTAGO STUDENTS 18,223 STUDENT TRIPS IN THE FIRST 22 DAYS OF THE TRIAL

10 PER CENT DROP IN WELLINGTON BUS TRIPS OVER THE PAST THREE YEARS 8 PER CENT RISE IN FARES OVER THE PAST THREE YEARS.

NEWS

OVARY REPRESENTED WHO RUN THE WORLD? WOMEN

by Alice Peacock

W

omen will continue to dominate Victoria’s enrolments in 2014, preliminary data suggests.

Enrolment statistics for the year to date see the female population at Victoria sitting at 8831, while male attendance falls behind at 7183. Around 55 per cent of Victoria’s student body is female, in line with 2013 data.

Historical gender divisions within Victoria’s faculties have also remained consistent over the past five years. Men continue to dominate Engineering, at 86 per cent of students, while 78 per cent of students at the Faculty of Education are female.

The gender breakdown at University Hall Weir House reflects the trend, with female residents making up around 60 per cent of the Hall. First-year Erin Hurley confirmed that this imbalance in the Law-student-dominated Hall of Residence has come to the attention of female residents.

“There just aren’t guys enough to go around; it’s like [ITALICS: The Bachelor], but a Weir House version.”

The trend for female dominance in education begins early, with girls outperforming boys in secondary education.

The most recent data released by NZQA show ten per cent more Year 13 girls achieved Level 3 NCEA than Year 13 boys. In 2012, 73 per cent of Year 13 girls gained University Entrance, compared to 61 per cent of Year 13 boys.

Minister of Education Hekia Parata released data on International Women’s Day showing that around 80 per cent of female schoolleavers had achieved at least NCEA Level 2 in 2012.

More than half of female students achieved University Entrance in 2012, a 5.2 per cent increase on the previous year.

“Girls continue to achieve higher levels of qualifications as they become greater contributors to society,” Parata said.

MEN

Science

Humanities

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Commerce

Education

Engineering

Law

Music

Enrolment data across all levels 10,000 9,200 8,400 7,600 6,800

2010

2011

2012

2013

2014

2014 (Preliminary Figures)

editor@salient.org.nz

9

NEWS

CORE FUNDING CHANGES IGNORE CORE PROBLEMS GOVERNMENT DECISION SPELLS CUTS FOR MĀORI RESEARCH

by Jamie Neikrie Four of the seven established Centres of Research Excellence (CoRE) will lose government funding in a decision slammed by the Māori Party.

The CoRE Fund was established in 2001 to encourage highquality, tertiary-education-based research. The fund allocates $35 million annually through a funding arrangement with the Tertiary Education Commission (TEC). This year’s successful applicants will receive funding until 2020.

Programmes removed from the shortlist for funding this year included the University of Waikato’s Ngā Pae o Te Māramatanga, the only Māori CoRE institute, as well as Massey’s Riddet Institute, the University of Auckland’s Gravida National Research Centre and Lincoln University’s Bio-Protection Centre.

Professor Linda Tuhiwai Smith, founding co-director of Ngā Pae o Te Māramatanga and Pro-Vice Chancellor Māori at Waikato, described the decision as unethical, and said funding had been cut

PARKS AND RECLAMATION

off just as progress was starting to be made.

Pita Sharples, co-leader of the Māori Party, has called for an overhaul of the Government’s funding processes in the wake of the decision. Sharples said the party has “serious misgivings about the process used to assess Centre of Research Excellence proposals.”

Sharples also questioned the makeup of the committee which allocates the funding, saying two of the six members were “professional board members” and only two had “pure science backgrounds.”

“We also question why there are no Māori on the committee, no social scientists on the committee, and indeed why there is only one woman on that committee. That’s hardly a diverse group of people sitting at the top making decisions on behalf of our diverse and culturally rich nation,” Sharples said.

Minister for Science and Innovation Steven Joyce has said the Government is committed to Māori social and cultural issues, noting the Matauranga Capability Fund and other government investment to improve science systems for Māori researchers to use.

Victoria University’s MacDiarmid Institute for Advanced Materials and Nanotechnology has not been told it will lose CoRE funding. The list of institutes which will receive CoRE funding for the next seven years will be announced at the end of April.

Zwaan said that VUWSA were working with the University to use some car parks currently allocated to lecturers.

He added that the University is unlikely to give up lecturer car STUDENTS SET TO LOSE CAR PARKS parks regardless of student needs, but they have been helpful in

by Simon Dennis keeping the Salamanca Rd car parks for the remainder of the year.

The construction of a new School of Biological Sciences over the ictoria University students will lose access to 16 car parks at the next five years will also limit the number of available car parks, with Kelburn Tennis Club on Salamanca Rd by next year. spaces being used for construction vehicles.

Wellington City Council owns the club, and helped VUWSA The existing car parks will be available to students until the to broker the arrangement to use the car parks available. The University finds 16 alternative car parks or until 30 November. arrangement was removed by the Council’s Community, Sport and Recreation Committee.

The Council said that under its Town Belt management plan, commercial activity was banned from places like car parks.

The car park is also used by Club Kelburn, which is a profitable organisation.

VUWSA Welfare Vice-President Rick Zwaan said VUWSA would continue working this year to find a solution and ensure no loss of parking capacity.

“Currently, we only have 188 car parks available on Kelburn Campus, and each year there’s way more demand than that. While we encourage active and public transport, it’s crucial that students that can’t get to [University] without a car aren’t left out.”

“Car parks are allocated on a needs basis, with health considerations and children given priority along with students who don’t have access to public transport.”

V

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NEWS

UNI COUNCIL REFORM T

here are many controversial aspects to the Education Amendment Bill, but none more so than the question of student representation on university councils. However, I think asking directly whether this is desirable misses the point. If I’m right in my view that student representation is a lofty but hopeless goal, we should simply focus on getting effective university councils.

The question of what ‘student representation’ actually means has been picked apart in New Zealand since the VSM debate started in 2009, and the old consensus has been found wanting. Previously, under compulsory student membership, there was a legal fiction that student associations represented all students. In fact they did not; student representatives were regularly voted in by the tiny minority of five to ten per cent of students with an activist bent. They had little incentive to encourage broader participation, for the most part preferring to remain within a bubble or outright abuse positions of power. Their ultimate defeat in the VSM debate was telling: this so-called group of student leaders and wannabe future MPs couldn’t make a convincing argument if their lives depended on it, much less organise an effective lobbying and public-relations strategy for an at-best tenuous status quo.

The alternative and totally opposite approach to garner a student voice was the Student Forum, a randomly selected group who could represent a greater cross section of students. Sadly, this didn’t work either; it seems the ‘average student’ simply didn’t care enough to show up to meetings, and after a series of embarrassing setbacks, the Forum was canned.

Directly electing a student representative to the board represents the worst of both worlds. Campaigns for this position are often vapid and devoid of substance; if we’re lucky, the winner is the person whose slogan is the best pun/alliteration on their name. There is also little accountability since few candidates seem to stand for more than one term, meaning there is no ability to ‘vote them out’ for poor performance or misrepresentation.

I say all this to point out that maybe meaningful and direct student representation is impossible to achieve on University Councils. Even where student’s opinions aren’t elusive, they are diverse and poorly informed. It’s also important to remember that every decision by the University administrators and governors is ultimately made in the interests of the University stakeholders; we simply disagree on how best to pursue those interests. Of course students have something to contribute to that decision-making, but is grossly deficient student representation really better than none? I struggle to answer that question with an emphatic ‘yes’.

The Education Amendment Bill will make university councils more effective by downsizing the often unruly bodies, and hopefully bringing in people who know what they’re doing through Ministerial appointments. And that’s all I’ll say for it.

The Government has proposed making changes to the Uni Council. The Uni Council is the governing body of the University, and has the primary responsibility for establishing the strategic plan of the University, monitoring academic activities, and ensuring sound financial management – including being responsible for setting fees. The key changes proposed are to shrink the maximum size of councils from a 20 to 12, and to remove guaranteed representation for students. Is this a good idea? Two students go head-to-head.

S

tudent representation is a victim of its own success. We have things pretty good today. You don’t have lecturers giving grades based on personal favours, or changing the goalposts a week before exams. There is a big free student health service, which is pretty good. You have clubs and societies and feedback forms. All these exist because at some point, some student raised hell to get it in place, and since then students have quietly and thanklessly been working to protect your rights and address new issues. You don’t often hear about it. Only a few of you are reading this. But it’s important. Because if student voice disappears, our rights and ability to influence change go with it.

Sonya’s column does a good job explaining why the proposal is wrong, but I’ll expand on a couple of points. The idea may be that reducing the size of councils will make them more nimble or effective, but there has been no evidence indicating this will occur. If anything, the evidence suggests the opposite. As it stands, there are a number of top universities with sizable councils, such as the University of Cambridge with a council of 23 (including three students).

Let’s imagine that there was convincing evidence, however. The question then becomes why 12 is the magic number? If forced to shrink, Victoria proposed 14 as a smaller number that it could work with (with maintained stakeholder representation). Why? Universities are complex and diverse, and need council members with both an institutional knowledge and background, and specific skills in areas such as finance and law. Going below 14 risks too narrow a skill set, and provides an insufficient pool of skills to fill Committees of Council (such as Finance, or Audit & Risk) and serve in other key roles. Having a larger Council enables specialisation, promoting efficiency and focus.

The problem with putting our faith in Ministerial appointees to do all of the above isn’t that they’re bad people. The problem is that even with the noblest of intentions, they can never hope to have detailed knowledge of how decisions at the highest level impact staff and students on the ground, as they simply aren’t spending the time here day-to-day. If better governance skills from staff and student representatives are sought, a wiser approach would be providing more training.

Last year’s Student Representation Review worked to set up structures that will require all representatives to provide contact details, information on what they’re doing on boards and committees (including the University Council), and to consult regularly with other representatives before meetings. This is a great step to try to make representation better. Fair comment that things aren’t ideal. But don’t give up. Fix the problems instead.

editor@salient.org.nz

11

NEWS

ENVIRONMENTAL POLITICS If you were able to enact or repeal one law to improve the environment, what would it be and why?

Amy Adams, National As a government, we are constantly passing laws and making changes to improve the environment. For example, we have committed more than $350 million to clean up historical contamination of our iconic waterways, created the EEZ Act, distributed nearly $100 million to help communities minimise waste, passed regulations to require significant water-takes are metered, implemented a National Policy Statement for Freshwater, proposed national standards for freshwater, and made important changes to the Resource Management Act. We are currently in the process of progressing the Environmental Reporting Bill, which will give New Zealanders access to highquality environmental information.

Moana Mackey, Labour Labour understands that our economy and environment are two sides of the same coin. If we want future generations to be able to benefit from the environmental wealth upon which we have built our country, then we have to respect the natural limits of our environment and stop making unsustainable decisions. Labour will legislate to future-proof the New Zealand economy by transitioning away from our heavy reliance on fossil fuels to an innovative, low-carbon economy. An economy that takes full advantage of technologies and solutions that are available right now and renewable resources which will never run out.

Gareth Hughes, Greens I have a Member’s Bill to create the world’s largest marine reserve around New Zealand’s Kermadec Islands, and it would be great to see this proposal pass alongside modern marine reserves law.

Creating this reserve would overnight lift the percentage of New Zealand’s waters protected in marine reserves from less than half of one per cent to 15 per cent. The Kermadecs marine reserve would become our only marine reserve to protect an entire ecosystem, and it would protect incredible species such as whales, sharks and turtles, and would send the world a strong message New Zealand is serious about marine conservation.

Andrew Williams, NZ First New Zealand First would ensure legislation provides conservation authorities with the necessary resources and legislative framework for effective protection of the environment. Such legislation would

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require consultative debate taking account of the views of all stakeholders on the issue of extractive industries, ensuring that key conservation values are maintained. We would make sure developers are responsible to their communities to avoid, remedy and mitigate adverse environmental effects. This legislation would recognise that our country’s natural environment has international significance, is a New Zealand priority, and that it is wise to view the preservation and enhancement of the environment as sound economics.

Tariana Turia, Māori Party The Māori Party seeks to ensure our natural resources and environment are healthy for current and future generations, and acknowledge the role of hapu and iwi as tangata tiaki over our natural resources as an important part of this. We support a nuclear-free and GE-free Aotearoa, and want to see improved public transport that reduces emissions. We believe there should be affordable, sustainable and renewable energy services for all New Zealand families, including subsidies for solar heating. We are committed to the environmental principles of the Resource Management Act which must be upheld to ensure that environmental issues are not outweighed by economic priorities.

Jamie Whyte, ACT Our environment is not suffering from a lack of laws. Improving the environment requires property rights and prosperity. Property rights are needed because the best incentive to look after the environment is to own it. Prosperity is required because wealthy people can afford to look after their environments, whereas poor people often can’t afford not to trash them: compare our efforts to save the kakapo with elephant-hunting for ivory in Africa.

Peter Dunne, United Future To promote the planting of native trees and bush along or close by all inland waterways where practical, in order to act as carbon sinks, limit soil erosion and reduce agricultural runoff.

Such riparian planting has numerous effects including the improvement of water quality, reducing erosion into our rivers and streams, and reducing the associated effects that come with excessive erosion, the creation of safe routes for native birds between larger patches of bush, and improve the freshwater fisheries around New Zealand.

NEWS OF THE WORLD

BY SOPHIA ROBERTS

A

selfie-taking student has broken the leg off a priceless 19th-century Italian sculpture. The Drunken Satyr sculpture is installed in the Academy of Fine Arts of Brera in Milan. Witnesses said the young man jumped into the lap of the sculpture to take a picture of himself, but in the process snapped the leg which then smashed on the ground. While not being caught on camera as there was no working CCTV in the area, several witnesses saw the student honing his selfie game.

A

pet cat is being put into therapy after holding its family hostage. Lux, a ten kilogram cat, trapped his owners in their bedroom after scratching their baby.

The owners called 911 and the cat was eventually subdued using a dog snare and crate.

Famed cat whisperer Jackson Galaxy is tackling the case in his Animal Planet show My Cat From Hell. The self-proclaimed “Cat Daddy” has worked with thousands of cats using his unique “Cat Mojo” technique. The American family were apparently shocked that their cat, which has “a history of violence”, responded aggressively after their baby pulled its tail and they kicked it.

A

new app named Cloak may see the end of avoidance via road-crossing, fake texting or awkward eye-contact dodging. Invented by former BuzzFeed creative director Chris Baker and Brian Moore, Cloak uses GPS from other social media such as Instagram and Foursquare to track people’s positions. Looking a bit like Google Maps, a Cloak user can track people they would rather avoid. Cloak describes its uses as being to “avoid exes, co-workers, that guy who likes to stop and chat – anyone you’d rather not run into.”

SHARE OF THE PARTY VOTE THAT THE NATIONAL PARTY WILL WIN AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION?

45%

SHARE OF THE PARTY VOTE THAT THE LABOUR PARTY WILL WIN AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION?

31%

SHARE OF THE PARTY VOTE THAT THE GREEN PARTY WILL WIN AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION?

14.7%

SHARE OF THE PARTY VOTE THAT OTHER PARTIES WILL WIN AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION?

9.3%

TURNOUT AT 2014 GENERAL ELECTION

75%

iPredict is a market-based political and economic prediction market owned and operated by Victoria University of Wellington. Visit www.ipredict.co.nz to get involved. Probabilities are correct at time of publication.

editor@salient.org.nz

13

INTERVIEW

Russel Norman

by Duncan & Cam

Russel Norman, the co-leader of the Green Party, keeps his office on the 14th floor of Bowen House. Leafy vines cover the back windows. He wears a grey organic cotton T, baggy denim jeans and skate shoes. Norman is Australian, and he has very much maintained the drawl.

The Politician D&C:What’s your advice for students to do their bit?

R: Often, transport is the big footprint.

It’s also expensive so you know, yeah, that’s also one of the big things to get on top of.

Transport’s a big one. Obviously, what you can do with your scraps in terms of sending them to the landfill is all pretty easy to deal with in terms of growing veges.

D&C:If you were the kingmaker for a day, and you could enact one law to improve the environment of NZ, what would it be? [see p 13] R: Well I mean in terms of NZ environmental issues, it’s gotta be about freshwater: probably some proper standards around levels of nitrogen, phosphorous and sediment in rivers.

Government is proposing some levels at the moment that will allow rivers to have more than 1.5 times the nitrate as the Yangtze River in China. The standards they are proposing [mean] rivers don’t have to be drinkable; they don’t have to be swimmable; they don’t have to wade-able. You have to be careful you don’t touch anything. Don’t get splashed ‘cause you’ll get sick. The groundwater in Canterbury now is so toxic that if you fed it to your kids it would kill them.

D&C: Genetic Engineering? [see p 28] R: ‘Keep it in the lab’ I guess is the slogan. We are fine with using GE in the lab; we are fine with using GE insulin, for example. But yeah, we keep it in the lab. Can’t let it loose on the environment.

D&C: Is apathy the problem? [see p 21] R: Well I mean nonetheless, if you look

14

the nature issue

at recycling rates, they have gone through the roof. People are recycling. We still get improvements in cycling and walking. Public transport (‘PT’, he calls it for short. What lingo.) is doing alright. I mean, a lot of things are structural. So if the Government spends all the transport money on motorways, then it makes it very difficult for people to choose alternatives to the private car because it becomes an obstacle.

D&C: Deep-sea drilling?

R: We wouldn’t. The reason being twofold: one is just the risks around the kind of the dangers exposed by Deepwater Horizon.

The ability to plug a hole when you get one. I always assumed, as all of us did, that blowout responses had always worked and it turns out they don’t. And the second issue is climate change. Just from the point of view of preserving a stable climate then you just can’t burn it anyway.

D&C: Do you think the moves away from coal and fossil fuels will increase power prices?

R: I just don’t think it’s true. The most expensive power in NZ at the moment is coal-fired power, so Huntly [last NZ coal power plant] only comes on at peak point.

The Green Party vision is quite different. It’s that we all have smart meters at home and it says if you want to turn on your [appliance] at 9 pm instead of 6 pm, you will pay a lot less for your power. That will incentivise a movement in demand. Once you take the top off the peak, then you don’t need to turn Huntly on anymore, so everyone gets cheaper power and you don’t burn coal. It’s just about being smart.

Then if you think about the next step, it’s gonna be electric vehicles. We are gonna have

electric vehicles and so in the middle of the night when we have geothermal going, we’ve got windpower going and nothing much to do with it, then you can just suck it up into your electric vehicles.

D&C: Geoengineering? [see p 20] R: We’re pretty sceptical about geoengineering and also carbon capture and storage. I mean, obviously, both technologies are in their early days. We don’t know where we are going to go, but the danger is that people go, “Oh well!

We don’t have to do anything about reducing emissions because maybe some magic will come along and fix it all for us.”

The Person D&C: How do you get to work?

R: Varies. Mostly I walk or bus. Bus No 21.

D&C:What do you do for lunch?

R: I have my lunchbox. [Today, scroggin and a cheese-and-tomato toasted sandwich] D&C: Do you have a good vege garden?

R: It’s okay. I have three worm bins. But I just don’t have enough time to look after it.

D&C: Do you use organic food?

Probably 90 per cent fruit and veges are organic.

D&C: Have you smoked pot?

R: Yeah.

INTERVIEW

Mayor Celia Wade-Brown

by Duncan & Cam Wellington Mayor Celia Wade-Brown occupies an office in the Council Buildings in Civic Square. As a person, she’s bubbly and earnest. As a politician, she’s keen and intelligent. She used to be a Green Party councillor, but is adamant that she is an independent mayor, beholden to no party structures and accountable only to Wellingtonians. Her English accent is still faintly noticeable.

The Politician D&C:On getting involved in politics: C: The only reason I’m in politics is because I did a beach clean-up once upon a time.

I’ve always had a great interest in botany and zoology and ecology. I’d never thought of myself in politics, and then I did this clean-up for Greenpeace. I organised this adopt-a-beach event back in 1991 at Island Bay. It had a little write-up in the paper. I met a councillor at that time, and not long after that, I was asked if I was interested in running for Council.

D&C: On the environment: C: It’s a philosophy that you can have a successful economy and a successful environment and an inclusive society.

You’ve got to aim for it all working. I aim for a sustainable city. Reducing the impact of Wellingtonians on the natural environment is important, because the environment is a major part of the city. There is an overflow of birds from Zealandia. I’m not sure of any other city where you can hear Kaka flying around. It’s fantastic to be able to go for a kayak in the harbour at lunchtime. Oruaiti Reserve in Miramar is international-award-winning and involves dozens of groups. Wellington is a biophilic city. Contact with nature is important for the health of humans.

D&C: On the future of Wellington’s public transport: C: The driving force is improving public transport. We’ve had flat patronage for the last few years. The idea of light rail captured my imagination and the public’s imagination. It went through a robust process of assessing routes, patronage, cost, practicability. There were 88 different modes and routes of transport looked at.

The top three were light rail, bus rapid transit and bus priority. When we looked at the next stage, bus rapid transit made the most practical sense, and I changed my views to support it as the next significant step. At some point, we will need to move beyond bus rapid transit. Light rail may be a viable option for the future.

D&C: On walking and cycling: C: Less than half of Wellingtonians drive to work, and more people walk than catch public transport. We’re the most walkable city in Australasia. Almost 20 per cent of Wellingtonians walk to work. This year, we have trebled the budget for cycling expenditure. There has been a 73 per cent increase in people who cycle to work since the last census. We have changed drain covers so that bike tyres don’t get stuck in them D&C: On fairer bus fares for students: C: Yes, but I think that tertiary institutions need to contribute, as they do at Massey in Palmerston North. It must be cheaper for the University than having student carparks.

D&C: On the proposed Basin Reserve flyover: C: I voted against it.

D&C: On introducing warrants of fitness on rental properties: C: Yes, and we are trialling it on a mix of private and council rental properties. We are one of five cities doing it. We have gone out with 31 criteria, but the final checklist will be smaller. We’re checking things like water temperature, dampness, safe electrics. We have to ask questions like do we include an earthquake check? Do we just look at insulation and heating, or do we look at safety?

D&C: On ways students can reduce their impact on the natural environment: C: Get a bike. Find out the walking shortcuts. Use the op shops. I’m an opshopper. There’s lots of good ones. I’ve got a couple of second-hand dresses that I’ve worn to glitzy functions. Don’t overconsume. Most of all, get involved.

Make submissions to the Council and to government. We got into this mess through a series of individual and political and corporate actions; we will get out of the mess by a series of individual political and corporate actions. It’s not all about the individual, and it’s not all about organisations like the Council.

The Person D&C: Do you have a car?

C: Yes, a Subaru Outback. It stays at home during the week.

D&C: How do you get to work?

C: I either bike or walk to work. I have three bikes – folding, normal, electric.

D&C: What do you have for lunch?

C: There is no typical lunch. Sometimes nothing when I’m very busy. Sometimes a toastie.

D&C: Favourite vegetable?

C: Fried aubergine.

D&C: Have you ever smoked pot?

C: When I was about 20.

D&C: Us too.

editor@salient.org.nz

15

POLITICS

R amblin gs o f a fallen hack

L

ast month, 29 West Coasters had their jobs destroyed as Bathurst Resources delayed mining the Denniston Plateau.

This followed two years of redundancies at the Stockton Mine – over 400 jobs lost as falling coal prices rendered Solid Energy insolvent. For the miners, this meant either the emotional destitution of unemployment or abandoning the town they call home.

For Westport, this meant losing one of the few industries the rural community had left.

These job losses are a tragedy.

They’re a tragedy because they needed to happen.

A brutal confrontation with climate change is drawing near. We know it must be dealt with, and for the most part we know how. Coal cannot be the future’s fuel. We get it – but we’ve forgotten that this is something to regret.

The 1972 publication of Limits to Growth seeded modern environmentalism. It argued that for modernity to avoid catastrophic collapse, it needed to accept the limits of the environment. Living within our means required a deliberate reduction in our standard of living; jobs would disappear as we struggled to make do with less. Perhaps it was hysteria, perhaps a far-sighted wisdom – the ideology certainly stood for something different. It didn’t last long. As the greenies courted the absent-minded masses, they forgot the tragedy that lay in their core.

Tragedy is defined by its inevitability, but politics doesn’t allow that. We are easily bored, and we want perfect solutions even when none can exist. And so the critique

of materialist consumption was replaced by well-designed images of wind turbines. It made for pretty election billboards, but the green-jobs utopia obscured the struggle that needed to come.

By arguing that high-tech manufacturing should replace mining, we are arguing that working-class jobs should be given to the elite. When your highest qualification is NCEA Level 2, you’re not going to retrain as an electrical engineer. And green jobs are city jobs. Scientists and technologists need to be close to one another. Good ideas are difficult to engineer, but we know they come from collaboration, from coffee dates between experts in disparate fields and off-hand comments that spawn the Next Big Thing.

Scientific communities require a scale that Westport cannot provide. In the cleantech future, rural economies crumble.

Politics peddles optimism, but sometimes there is no win-win. This hasn’t just stricken the hippies. Leftists have abandoned their class analysis for the belief that income inequality hurts even those with the highest incomes.

Helping the poor is done for the sake of the rich. There are no trade-offs, no hard calls.

C’mon guys, we’re all in this together.

But politics isn’t Boy Scouts. The bright ideas that will help us all are running short.

People are going to be hurt. We must deal with climate change, but we must not forget the real pain our solutions will cause. We can accept things will be difficult without accepting nothing should be done. Perhaps a green economy is necessary. That doesn’t mean it’s cause for celebration.

by Jade d’Hack

16

the nature issue

Parliamentary Sass of the Week “The member may be more familiar with the tenets of Communism than I am” Bill English to Russel Norman, on land ownership in China.

Top 5 Dead Political Parties in New Zealand 1. Social Credit – Used to get over ten per cent in the era before MMP. Didn’t last.

2. The Alliance – Split over Iraq.

3. Christian Heritage – Leader Graham Capill was convicted of serious crimes.

4. Destiny NZ – Brian Tamaki said Destiny would rule NZ. 0.62 per cent of the vote later...

5. ACT – Pending.

Who is Asking… About the Economy?

So far this year in Parliament, the Labour Party have asked seven questions about the economy.

The Greens have asked three questions. New Zealand First have not asked any questions about the economy.

B y J o r d a n M c C lu s k e y

COLUMN

The I ntrepi d V C G u i lf o r d E p i s o d e 4 : L i b r a r y n o t - s o - f i n es

I

t had been a few weeks since the toga fiasco.

Guilford seemed to have made no progress infiltrating the student body, and had not heard from Arcadia-Rae since recruiting her as his mole on the inside. Petersen strolled leisurely through the Hunter corridors, nodding at students, smiling at staff members, just generally being pretty chirpy. He stopped outside Guilford’s office, adopted a more earnest expression, knocked, and entered the room.

“Good morning sir, I’ve brought you the denim vest—“ He halted. Guilford was nowhere to be seen. Which was strange, according to Petersen, who has told me before that (at least on Mondays and Tuesdays) Guilford can usually be found pacing his office singing the first verse of ‘Six Months in a Leaky Boat’ (the only verse he knows).

On Guilford’s desk, Petersen found a note which read: Infiltration continues, am conducting surveillance, sixth floor, library, come at once.

Petersen half-heartedly searched the sixth floor, but couldn’t find Guilford until he heard a growling whisper.

“Psst, Petersen.”

He looked around. There was no one there.

“Bloody hell Petersen, down here.”

Petersen crouched down. A moment passed.

“This may be an odd question, sir. But what are you doing under the bookshelf?”

“It’s the best vantage point, it provides a degree of conceal-munt and a view of someone’s shoes,” said Guilford. “You can tell a lot about a person by their shoes. I’ve been scoping out this group right here, a zoological study of sorts, y’know. This boy here, he’s studying Anthropology. She’s studying Anthropology.

This in-da-vidu-all is studying Anthropology too. There’s something fishy going on here Petersen, everyone’s studying Anthropology.

It seems the entire student body has switched majors. Hey you!” He was shouting at the aforementioned boy, who he had previously

identified as shifty-looking male specimen no.

4, “Why is everyone studying anthropology, is it a cool thing, like chinos?”

“Shhh!” snapped the boy. “This is a blue zone.”

“I think you’ll find, sir,” murmured Petersen, “that this is the Anthropology section.”

“Ah, so it is. Thank God you’re here, Petersen.

Anyway, it’s time to shift po-sish-uns, I’m tired of the negative add-tudes here, and we have more students to track.”

Petersen stood up to leave.

“Bugger,” said Guilford.

“Sir?” “It seems I’m stuck, so to speak.”

“Figuratively?”

“No not figuratively, bloody literally.”

“I see.”

“God damn it Petersen. Don’t just stand there and say ‘I see’. Nobody got anyone else out from underneath a bookshelf by saying ‘I see’.”

“What would you like me to do, sir?”

“Jesus Christ give me some cover for a start, people are starting to stare.”

Actually, people had been staring at him all afternoon; he wasn’t exactly subtle, under the bookshelf taking photos of everyone’s shoes. In fact, he was himself at that moment the subject of exactly 32 Snapchats and three Vines.

“You know Petersen, I’m pretty apolitical, but I must say that it’s bloody typical of the current gummint to be skint on the funding it gives us to conduct covert operate-shuns. They give us nothing in fact, Petersen. And what’s the result?

NZ varsities go round getting their VCs stuck underneath bookshelves.”

“To the best of my knowledge, sir, you’re the only Vice-Chancellor currently underneath anything.”

“Oh yes, at the moment. But you just wait and see, see what the lack of manpower does to administrations across the country.”

An acetous librarian was advancing towards them.

“Oh God. I can’t feel my legs, Petersen, I’m going cold. It’s all the tramping, they’ve made my thighs beautiful-ly herculean and I can’t get into tight spots like I used to.”

The librarian arrived and said to Guilford: “I’ve received complaints of an older man disturbing other peoples’ study by shouting ‘Hooya!’ and using a duck call. I assume that is you. What’s your name?”

“I’m Jakob Petersen,” said Guilford.

“What? I’m Jakob Petersen,” said Petersen.

The librarian raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t mind him, he’s stuck underneath a bookshelf,” said Guilford.

“You’re the one underneath a bookshelf.”

“No, Petersen is.”

“You said you are Petersen.”

“Oh that’s right,” Guilford took a second to gather his words, “I – Jakob Petersen – am stuck under a bookshelf. I am most definitely not Grant Guilford who is not here right now and certainly not stuck underneath a shelf.”

“And who are you then?” said the librarian to Petersen.

“Ah – I’m Stephen. From accounts.”

“Well look Stephen, Petersen. Would the two of you kindly get the hell out of my library before I call campus security?”

“Who was it?” Her equally vinegary colleague asked at the front desk.

“Guilford, he’s under the bookshelves again.”

“Do make sure security puts it on YouTube this time.”

“Jesus Christ, that was close,” said Guilford, “thanks for covering for me Petersen.”

Petersen sighed.

“But seer-ess-ly I’m really fucking stuck Petersen, ya gotta me get out of here without anyone noticing.”

“Don’t worry sir, I think I can get you out.”

He stepped aside and pulled out his phone.

“Hi. Arcadia-Rae? We need your help.”

by Hugo McKinnon

editor@salient.org.nz

17

COLUMN

B E I N G W E L L

Y

our own teeth are the nicest teeth Good oral health is essential for our wellbeing and quality of life. Untreated dental disease can lead to serious health problems such as infection, damage to bone or nerve, and tooth loss, which isn’t much fun and can cause pain and distress and be expensive to treat.

Along with the tips below, regular dental visits are a crucial part of caring for your teeth and gums.

1. Brush twice daily, especially once before bedtime. When you brush, don’t rush. Take enough time to do a thorough job.

2. Remember to brush the outside, inside and chewing surfaces of your teeth, as well as your tongue.

3. Use fluoride toothpaste, and after brushing, spit the toothpaste out. Avoid rinsing the paste from your mouth after brushing as this will wash the fluoride away from your teeth.

4. Floss or use interdental brushes once daily to clean between your teeth.

5. As long as you do a thorough job, it doesn’t matter if you brush or floss first. However, flossing before brushing might allow more fluoride from your toothpaste to reach between your teeth.

6. Replace your toothbrush every three to four months — or sooner if the bristles become frayed.

7. Avoid eating sugary, sticky and acidic foods and drinks in between meals.

8. If you play a sport that involves contact, flying balls, or elbows, protect your teeth with a good mouth guard – one that is custom-made for you. Wear it during both practice and games.

Discounted dental care is available for Victoria University students at Symes de Silva & Associates and Capital Dental. They both charge $60 for an examination, polish and basic x-ray and offer a 20 per cent discount on treatment (some exclusions apply). You need to show your student ID. S y m es d e S i lva & As s o c i at es

C a p ital D ental N e w to wn

Capital Dental Peto ne

97–99 Courtenay Place Phone (04) 801 5551 Mon–Thurs 8.30 am – 9 pm Fri–Sat 8.30 am – 5.30 pm Sun 9 am – 5 pm

125–129 Riddiford St Phone (04) 389 8880 Mon–Fri 8 am – 5 pm

272 Jackson St Phone (04) 920 0880 Mon–Fri 8.30 am – 5 pm

A Special Needs Grant for emergency dental treatment for students on a low income is available from StudyLink. The grant is for up to $300 a year. You will need to get the dentist to fill out an Emergency Dental Treatment form (they should have them) and get it approved by StudyLink before getting the treatment done. You may also qualify for help to pay for dental care from the Hardship Fund at Victoria University of Wellington. Visit the Financial Support and Advice Service for more information: www.victoria.ac.nz/st_services/finadvice/

18

the nature issue

M AO R I M AT T E R S

S

ince this is the Environment issue of Salient, Ngāi Tauira searched around campus for an environmental story with a Māori flavour, and came across a tasty story happening at Te Kawa a Māui or the School of Māori Studies.

Part of the job at Māori Studies is to protect and promote Māori culture. Traditional horticulture and good preparation are a thread in the wider tapestry that is Māori culture and tradition.

Nestled behind the Te Kawa a Māui offices, this thread is being actualised with the preparation for a maara kai or traditional vegetable garden right here at Kelburn Campus.

The ethos behind this initiative is to recreate the type of garden that Māori would have tended pre- European contact, sourcing crops such as kumara, gourds and yams. There are plans for the maara kai to be incorporated into classes as a teaching tool.

If you would like to know more about this initiative, the friendly staff members in the front offices of 50KP can help answer your questions.

Moreover, if you’re so inspired, why not take up MAOR217 and have a structural way of being involved in tending and learning about the maara kai?

A very hungry Ngāi Tauira Exec member over and out.

K

o te tai-o-mihi tenei te pari atu nei ki a tatau katoa, The Ngāi Tauira AGM date has been changed to Thursday 10 April 2014, 5.30 pm, at Te Herenga Waka Marae. Kai will be provided at the conclusion of the meeting.

Agenda for the AGM will be as follows: i. Karakia/Mihimihi ii. Minutes of the previous Special General Meeting iii. Apologies iv. Kōmiti Whakahaere Reports and proposed priorities for 2014 v. Financial report vi. Appointment of Auditor vii. Constitutional Amendments viii. General Business ix. Election of Officers of the Kōmiti Whakahaere The Ngāi Tauira executive wish to advise that constitutional amendments will be made to the Ngāi Tauira Incorporated Constitution at the Annual General Meeting of Ngāi Tauira Incorporated on Thursday 10 April 2014. The particulars of these changes will be made available

by Thursday 27 March 2014, two weeks prior to the AGM, via the Ngāi Tauira website www.ngāitauira.org.nz and our Facebook page www.facebook.com/ngāitauiravuw. These changes will be subject to legal review by our nominated Legal Counsel before the AGM. For further information, please contact ngaitauira@vuw.ac.nz.

PRESIDENT’S COLUMN

I

was surprised to see Harry Tothill’s opinion piece ‘The case for smaller University Councils’ on the Young Nats blog last week. For a [ITALICS: student] to argue that there’s no need for students to have a mandatory seat on the most powerful board at the University seemed a bit strange. It was a response to the announcement from Minister for Tertiary Education, Steven Joyce, that he wants to reduce the size of university councils, and remove the requirement for our university to have students at the table.

Harry argued that Council is a place for setting the University budget and monitoring the performance of senior managers. He argued that this sort of serious business can be left up to those with significant governance expertise – usually an older man in a suit, not your average student. He tried to argue that the Council is “the least appropriate organ for engaging the broader academic community” – why can’t students and staff have their say in other ways, right? Or, if student representation is really “worthwhile”, then Victoria will make sure students are there.

With respect, Harry doesn’t really know what he’s talking about. University Council doesn’t just count money and set management targets. It covers everything from teaching strategy to new degrees, the University’s marketing campaigns and the future of buildings. At University Council’s last meeting, we discussed ways to make sure students and staff weren’t disrupted if the School of Music were to relocate to Vic. We discussed the future of Pipitea Campus, and I argued that any future building projects at Pipitea must include Clubs Space, so Pipitea can grow a student culture. Everything and anything strategically significant goes through Council, and our voices are critical. Often, students and staff haven’t got a chance to comment on the proposals, so we students on Council have a pretty heavy job on our shoulders. Or, students have been consulted but not listened to, so Council is the last chance to speak up. In a place as big as a university, student opinions in a survey, or at a Faculty meeting, can be lost on the way to the top. We’ve got to be there.

It just can’t be left up to the University to decide whether students should be there or not. This year’s Council may like the student reps and appreciate the tough questions that we ask, but in five years, a student rep who is too critical may be used as a reason to get rid of students altogether. That’s a real risk under this legislation. And that’s not okay when the University Council decides what the future of our university will ultimately look like – students must be a protected part of major decision-making, because it’s our university too.

Wellbeing and Sustainability Officer

H

i! I’m Steph Gregor, your Wellbeing and Sustainability Officer on the VUWSA Exec this year.

This is only the second year my role has existed, which is actually quite exciting because it means I have a lot of say over the kind of projects I get involved with. The big things I’m working on this year are rental warrants of fitness and improving mental health, both things which will have a big impact on student wellbeing.

Rental WOFs will provide a guarantee to students that their flats are up to a bunch of minimum standards in areas like insulation and ventilation. This is super-important for students in Wellington because we all want to be healthier, warmer and drier, and so we don’t wake up in the morning and find our shoes have gone mouldy (true story). There is also the added bonus of savings in power bills because heating becomes less inefficient, which also reduces the amount of carbon we all emit. Win-win.

The community as a whole also benefits from minimum rental standards – kids don’t grow up in shitty rental properties and the benefits are extended to them and their families. At the moment, we are working on getting the Council on board with a local Bill which Grant Robertson has kindly agreed to sponsor.

If you’re less interested in rental standards and more interested in getting hands-on with the environment, there are also some great groups on and off campus you can get involved with.

The Society of Conservation Biology describes itself as “an international professional organisation dedicated to promoting the scientific study of the phenomena that affect the maintenance, loss and restoration of biological diversity”. They do a whole lot of cool stuff to do with conservation, including restoration of the local Kumutoto Reserve.

Generation Zero is a youth-focussed climate-change group. They do a lot of lobbying and policy work, as well as the occasional protest and a lot of youth engagement. They pride themselves on being cluedup and politically savvy, and they really are.

Gecko is the on-campus environment group that has been defunct for the last couple of years. I’m interested in trying to start it up again this year, so if you want to hear more (or get involved with any of the groups), email me at stephanie.gregor@vuw.ac.nz and I’ll get you in touch with who you need to be.

Our environment is beautiful and valuable. Let’s do something proactive and not screw it up – get involved in whatever way you can. I’m always keen to hear from students about environmental and wellbeing issues, so get in touch.

Steph Gregor

editor@salient.org.nz

19

SO CRAZY IT MIGHT WORK

By Jamie Neikrie Climate change is a difficult problem to solve because it requires fundamental, institutional, or legislative change. Too often it feels like climate-change experts resort to doomsday predictions and politicians pass on reform for easier or more immediate concerns. Time is passing quickly, and our climate is deteriorating at an exponential, irreparable rate. Now is the time for radical solutions.

20

the nature issue

Blanket over the ice caps The polar ice caps are melting at a dangerously fast rate, raising ocean levels and threatening coastal cities. As ice caps melt, they darken in colour, losing their reflectivity and absorbing the Sun’s rays more. This process exponentially increases the rate of melting. Scientists want to cover the ice caps in areas like Greenland with a reflective blanket, reversing the trend.

Some scientists worry that doing so would simply trap heat between the blanket and the ice caps, increasing the melting rate, but there is no substantial evidence of this.

A massive blanket sounds crazy, but restoring the reflectivity of the ice caps could be a gamechanging idea.

Artificial trees Carbon dioxide removal is a well-documented potential solution to global warming. A variety of means of artificially capturing and storing carbon are being explored, with one company at the forefront.

Global Research Technologies (GRT) is creating “artificial trees”, towers that mimic photosynthesis. Using a dry resin, the towers will absorb carbon dioxide from the atmosphere. Unfortunately, the next step in the photosynthetic process, which would be to release oxygen, has yet to be developed.

The idea doesn’t seem to be totally motivated by environmental concern. The real genius is that GRT plans to sell the CO2 to oil and natural-gas companies, who use CO2 to create pressure and get natural resources out of the ground. Kind of defeats the purpose, doesn’t it.

Stratoshield The “Stratoshield,” an idea engineered by a company called Intellectual Ventures, attempts to cool surface temperatures by piping liquid sulfur dioxide into the stratosphere. As described by the idea’s inventor, Nathan Myhrvold, the “Stratoshield” would dim the Sun in critical areas of the world, mimicking the cooling effects of a volcanic eruption.

Unfortunately, many environmental activists see this strategy as “geoengineering”, the type of radical, man-made tampering of the Earth’s ecological system that created global warming in the first place.

The theory of blocking the Sun’s rays to combat rising temperatures has been seen before in other ideas like orbital sun shields and cloud-making ships.

Dials in every house Pause from the futuristic, sci-fi theme for a moment, because one of the best ways to curb our use of greenhouse gases is also the most simple: the government installs a dial in every household to measure energy consumption.

Seeing the number, people will attempt to lower their consumption, both out of awareness for the environment and consciousness of energy bills.

A similar system has been implemented in cars like the Toyota Prius, and has shown that the idea really does work.

Researchers estimate that the dial would cost governments around $100 per household, including installation. Small price to pay to help save the planet.

Tree Bombs The depletion of Earth’s forests has heavily contributed to the increase in carbon dioxide.

Without the process of photosynthesis to limit our carbon production, the ozone layer will continue to vanish. This idea works by dropping bombs full of seedlings on fertile ground, rapidly dispersing the seeds and regenerating our forests.

It sounds bonkers, but the idea was actually used in New Orleans to regrow the mangrove forests after Hurricane Katrina devastated the area, with considerable success.

No one likes the idea of littering forests with bombshells, but fly-over planes that disperse seeds could help fulfill the “plant 1000 trees” goal in a matter of hours.

Engineer Plankton Blooms This may be my favourite idea yet. Plankton may be one of the world’s smallest organisms, but as a whole they consume massive amounts of carbon and produce a significant portion of the Earth’s oxygen. Scientists are proposing placing wave-powered pumps in the Pacific Ocean that would force the nutrient-rich water in the colder depths to mix with the warmer surface waters, essentially acting as a feedlot for large plankton blooms.

Ecologists worry about the ramifications of tinkering with the food chain, but increasing plankton could fill a void left by diminishing forests.

Whether it’s reprogramming AIDS cells to target leukaemia or using internet microfinancing to combat poverty, humanity’s most serious problems have been challenged by innovation and ingenuity. Global warming is no different.

Radically reinventing the ways we think about transportation and construction, adapting our food-processing systems, harnessing untapped energy sources; these are the solutions. And turn off the fucking lights when you leave a room.

A-PATHETIC MINDSET

By Steph Trengrove

I

promise that I do give a shit that the planet is hurtling towards its own demise. I swear that I am concerned that my children and my children’s children may not enjoy the wonders of nature that I enjoy.

I can assure you that I’m scared of what is happening to our earth, and I promise that I want to change it… But despite my swearing blind that I do care, I am concerned and I want to make a difference, I haven’t stopped driving a car (or being driven in one – learner licence, no hate), or throwing my plastic bottles in the bin rather than the recycling from time to time, or accepting plastic bags from the supermarket.

I let myself think that the solution to climate change will come from somewhere else; that I’m a tiny and insignificant member of the population whose efforts make no difference. I allow myself to be apathetic.

Why is this? Am I lazy? Am I cajoled into thinking that climate change isn’t really a problem by those who refute its existence? Am I just too poor to buy eco-friendly products, and too busy to make my own cleaning solutions?

Some experts, like the secretary of the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change, Christiana Figueres, think that people like me (and you,

you car-driving, aerosol-spraying, apathetic students) are prevented from engaging with the issue of climate change because of a crisis in “eco-communication”. Basically, we all doze off when PhD-waving green-freaks start babbling away in jargon that we don’t understand. We can’t grasp what they’re talking about, so we just continue with our lives as the information pertaining climate change sails over our heads.

Others, such as former The Ecologist news editor Tom Levitt, suggest that “social comparisons” may be the culprit for our lack of drive to make a contribution to the fight against climate change. We compare our actions with those of others, and derive from these comparisons what the correct course of action is. For example, the fact that Al Gore has a large residence has been used in the past as justification for inaction. Not only this, but we tend to hold those who dub themselves ‘environmentalists’ to an impossibly high standard. When they fall below that standard, as they inevitably do, not only are we dissuaded from acting against climate change ourselves but we condemn them. By turning them from heroes into villains, we add to the cycle of apathy and inaction.

Maybe we don’t do anything because we don’t want to front up to what is happening. We don’t want to admit that our planet will likely be destroyed because of our greed and short-sightedness. It is too scary and too awful to think about

what we have done, and the disaster that will occur as a result. It is easier to pretend it isn’t happening – to go about our lives as normal and refuse to dwell on such a dark and dire thought.

But apathy is the enemy in this situation. Lack of concern about our little oasis in the midst of a barren solar-space is what led to this crisis in the first place. We’ve got nowhere else to go if our planet is destroyed, and no one to blame but ourselves if we are rendered homeless. At the end of the day, each and every one of us will suffer if Earth becomes inhospitable. When our air becomes poisoned and there’s no fresh water left, when sea levels rise and swallow dry land, when farms become barren and plants no longer produce fruit and vegetables, not a single one of us will be left unscathed. Therefore, the responsibility is spread between all of us to do something about it.

I don’t know what it will take for my apathy to be shaken. Will I wait until something really awful happens before I actually pull finger and do something about it? I hope not. I hope that when I’m older, and I look back at this time when we had the opportunity to shape the future that lay before us, that I can say that I was committed, and found out what all those intellectual eco-warriors were talking about when they frantically warned us about climate change.

That I was altruistic, and ignored what others were doing in the face of the issue, instead focussing on what I could do to help. And that I was brave; that I looked into the face of this terrifying future and had the courage to do something about it.

editor@salient.org.nz

21

FEATURE

PAY I N G G O L D T O B E G R E E N

BY M A D E L E I N E F O R E M A N The

e t h i cal e co - l i f e i s f o r s al e , an d i t ’ s e x p e n s i v e .

a s k s i f t h i s i s d i s t r ac t i n g u s f ro m

‘ r e al ’

M a d e l e i n e F o r e m an

s olu t i on s to e nv i ron m e n tal

i s s u e s , an d i f i t ’ s m a k i n g u s all s oun d a l i t t l e e l i t i s t i n t h e p roc e s s .

22

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FEATURE

I AM THE PROBLEM I am the best kind of environmentalist, and I’m probably a bit better than you. I wear French perfume to cover up the odour caused by walking up all of these hills. I only use it because my Thursday Plantation Tea Tree Oil deodorant sometimes doesn’t work so good, okay? I eat organic. I am local. I am greener (read: better) than you.

Is the way that I exercise my environmentalism elitist, and ultimately, distracting from ‘real’ policy solutions?

Probably. Definitely. Individuals are not the problem when it comes to environmental issues. Individuals, therefore, cannot be expected to be the focus of the solutions to these issues. Environmentalism that focusses on ethical consumption is bougie, alienating and annoying, and it comes at the expense of real institutional change.

For us ‘millennials’, the big ol’ environment prob is not new – we grew up with nursery stories of rising carbon dioxide, resource shortages, and the proverbial shitstorm which we will one day inherit.

Vital ecological processes and atmospheric functions upon which we depend have been deeply disturbed by us puny little humans.

We get it. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change’s latest report is bleak as fuck, and the response to it from most governments has been to comfort their populations with small solar-panel schemes, and to throw sand at each other from their respective sides of the sandpit. What has our response been to this, and has it been effective?

I AM THE SOLUTION The prevailing response to environmental issues from society has been to increase the surveillance of the individual. We monitor our ‘correct’ environmental decisions, and we watch to check that others carry out correct patterns of eco-consumption. We are told that environmental degradation, carbon emissions, and that issue with those fish in our local river, is the fault of all of

us. Responsibility is apportioned equally. We must engage with the state, through elections, and in the meantime we must ‘BUY THE RIGHT THINGS!!!’ in order to be good consumer citizens. Our organic tomatoes and dolphin-friendly tuna quell the guilty feelings, and we are told by our Facebook feeds that we’re ‘making a difference’.

Ben Gleisner, National Director of Conscious Consumers, believes in the power of the consumer. According to the Business and Consumer Behaviour 2013 survey, he says that two-thirds of consumers would switch brands if their regular brand was having a “bad effect on the environment, people or society.” While it’s important to give consumers more information, I’m unsold on the overall effectiveness and okayness of the conscious-consumer idea. Why? AM I NOT THE SOLUTION? Complex issues like ‘New Zealand’s carbon emissions per capita’ are seen to be within reach of Janet from Accounting and Mandy from History class. Janet and Mandy can make a small difference, for sure (they’re dears), but to blame these two women for New Zealand’s recent emissions alongside major producers is unfair, and misleading.

40 per cent of our country’s carbon dioxide emissions come from transport, and as much as dear Janet rides her bike to work and back each day, she is not doing much to dismantle the institutional obsession with motorways by doing so. There’s no use agonising over our ‘choice’ between cycling or driving to work, when really we just want effective and accessible public-transport systems – something which isn’t solely the result of those ‘consumer dollars’.

The idea of the ‘conscious consumer’ surely means there are ‘unconscious consumers’, or, as Gleisner says, “constrained conscious consumers.” It’s easy [and boring] to throw shade at the tired image of the Wellingtonian hipster with their holierthan-thou kale quiche, so I’m not going to.

The point is, though, eco-goods are usually extremely expensive, and not an option for

the majority of consumers. Environmental chat often involves generous lashings of paternalism towards those who cannot (or will not) consume ‘ethically’. For some environmentalists, ‘educating uninformed people’ is hot. Changing people’s minds about their ‘unethical lifestyle choices’ is hot. ‘Giving time and consideration’ towards people who can’t take the bus home because their shifts are late, and so they have to own a car, and sometimes eat Farmer Brown eggs because after their rent they don’t have much money left, is not so hot.

The belief that we must be ‘eco-chic’ by volunteering our time instead of our money is equally as annoying. Volunteering in our times is quite a large sacrifice, or an activity of the economically privileged.

Louise Sherrell, recent Victoria grad and Generation Zero volunteer, says when thinking about volunteering, consumption, and environmental policy, “it’s not about being a martyr and having dahl five nights a week because that is all you can [ethically] afford,” but rather, it is about “systemic policy change,” which presumably engages in institutional thinking.

Environmentalism that posits individual behaviour as the key way in which citizens are able to express their environmental values means that ‘political activity’ becomes elitist, and atomised. Focussing on our ‘destructive consumption’ means that there’s not much room to consider the role of institutions and producers, their culpability for environmental harms, and their responsibility for resolutions.

By all means, eat your organic broccolini and feel content while doing so – you go gal. For some, this is empowering.

Consider, however, rethinking your ecoenlightened status. Paying gold to be green is an individualised, elitist environmentalism that leads us to confuse consumers with citizens, and means that we police others’ choices in damaging ways. If we care about the environment and the broader policy solutions needed to address its currently sobering state, then we probably should stop telling others to eat their greens.

editor@salient.org.nz

23

FEATURE

BLAME IT ON THE

BY A L E X A N D R A H O L L I S

H ow ’ s

a b ou t t h i s w e at h e r , huh ?

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wa s

These

For

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doing

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d ay s , w e ’ r e b e t t e r at

e s ca p i n g t h e w e at h e r ; i t d o e s n ’ t a f f e c t ou r d a i ly lives like it did

It’s

10,000, 1000,

or even

100

years ago.

e a s y to t h i n k i t d o e s n ’ t a f f e c t u s at all .

s t i ll

there,

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it’s

alon g ,

an d i t ’ s s t i ll chan g i n g ou r l i v e s i n va r i ou s way s .

A l e x an d r a H oll i s

loo k s clo s e r at t h e r e lat i on s h i p

b e t w e e n w e at h e r an d m oo d .

AIN’T NO SUNSHINE? THEN YOU’RE GONE Turns out, a sunny disposition isn’t all politicians need this election year. They might also need actual sun. It’s prevailing wisdom that the weather on Election Day affects election results, but most of the work done on this has focussed on how bad weather affects voter turnout. However, when Anna Bassi, a political scientist from the University of North Carolina, looked at the impact of weather on the way people vote, she had some pretty decisive results.

Within an experiment where participants were asked to vote on candidates with very similar policies, with one candidate being less risky than the other, Bassi found that “sunlight and good weather have a positive impact on the likelihood of voting for riskier candidates, while voters rely more heavily on less risky candidates

24

the nature issue

FEATURE

in bad weather.” She theorised that this was because “self-assurance and attentiveness display a statistically significant decrease in bad weather conditions, while sadness displays a statistically significant increase”; in bad weather, we’re in worse moods. And when we’re in a bad mood, our future outlook tends to bleaker, making it less likely that we’ll vote for a candidate we perceive to be risky and likely to fuck up our lives even more than they’re already fucked up.

SUMMERTIME SADNESS As well as daily weather, we have an instinctive cultural understanding that seasons affect mood. Summer, filled with light and the laughter of children, is seen to be equated with happiness; winter, cold and dark, filled with the gnawing absence of the laughter of children, signals sadness. And there’s scientific evidence to back up this seasonal dichotomy; Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a mood disorder which affects up to half a million Americans, is marked by a significant depressive period in winter.

But it’s not this clear-cut. A recent report from Karolinska Institutet in Sweden, where they have been studying suicide in Greenland, says that, although “it is a widespread belief that the peak [in suicide rates] occurs in late autumn and early winter in relation to darkness,” results show suicide rates peaking instead in spring and summer for both the northern and southern hemispheres. In Greenland, which has one of the highest suicide rates in the world, this is especially pronounced, with 82 per cent of suicides occurring during the summer. These suicides occurred more often in the north of the country, where there is constant daylight for the four months from the end of April to the end of August. The researchers noted that “the majority of suicides seem impulsive rather than depressive,” theorising that these suicides may have been brought about by “a mixed affective state or delirium triggered by sleeplessness in the bright summer night.”

SAD also manifests in the summer, with increased anxiety, insomnia, and, in some cases, hypomania. Although the idea of the ‘winter blues’ persists, for some people summer is more fraught with illness than winter. So much for the laughter of children.

IN WARM BLOOD Temperature, too, plays a large role in determining our behaviour.

There is a significant correlation between heat and violent crime: Craig and Dona Anderson performed a study in the ‘90s and found that “aggressive crime increased in frequency as temperature

increased.” Ellen G Cohn, a criminologist who focusses on the link between weather and crime, also notes that “assaults, burglary, collective violence, domestic violence, and rape tend to increase with ambient temperature at least up to about 85°F.”

The reason for this, academics from Berkeley (Marshall Burke, Solomon Hsiang and Edward Miguel) explain, is to do with aggression; as temperatures rise, especially in cities, people tend to become more irate. Hence the increase in instances of violent crime.

But these researchers were concerned with another issue: scarcity.

They conducted a ‘meta-study’, analysing historical accounts of conflicts and weather, and found, with results which were “extremely unlikely to happen by chance,” that “episodes of extreme climate make people more violent toward one another.” Apart from aggression due to heat, they attribute this violence to the scarcity in resources which extreme weather brings, and conflict arising from this competition.

With climate change leading to more extreme weather, this bodes ill for our future. As Burke, Hsiang and Miguel say, “our children and grandchildren could face an increasingly hot and angry planet.”

WEATHER RAPPORT There’s this idea that you shouldn’t talk about the weather, that to talk about the weather is to descend into the depths of anecdotal despair, a sign that you’re turning, inevitably, into Great Aunt Karen With All The Cats.

But the weather impacts so much more than needing to trot out that ugly raincoat your mum made you buy; we know this.

We live in Wellington. Our weather is not small-talk weather; it’s not polite weather. It’s weather which makes the news, and justifies making the news. I am strangely, quietly, proud of this; in the midst of our most roof-battering storms, my hometown pride, absent for Phoenix games or Lonely Planet rankings, comes out in full force.

Live in this city for long enough, and weather becomes at best a regular source of conversation, and, at worst, an obsession. It’s how we connect ourselves to our environment, and our environment to others. If I was trying harder to justify having spent 1000 words talking about the weather, I’d even call it a form of civic bonding.

But I won’t. Because you shouldn’t have to justify talking about the weather. It affects us in ways we don’t even realise; it’s changing in drastic and terrifying ways, and there’s so fucking much of it to talk about.

Winter is coming. Have fun.

editor@salient.org.nz

25

WHAT KIND OF ENVIRONMENTALIST ARE YOU?

by Philip McSweeney

QUESTIONS 1. Children are: A) A demographic that a very specific restraining order prevents me from getting within 50 feet of (it was nothing weird, I swear: I just got a tiiiny bit overenthusiastic in a ballfight at a McDonald’s playground).

B) Nefarious Devil-Spawn, though occasionally kind of cute I guess.

C) The Future.

2. You’ve just eaten a meal at a French restaurant. What is your response?

A) That foie-gras-stuffed veal is by universal accord the best goddamn meal ever ingested by man.

B) Delicious, but much too expensive; I’ll stick with Burger Fuel next time, thanks.

C) You wouldn’t be caught dead in a restaurant that contributes to the subjugation of animals; Aunty Mena’s Vegetarian and Vegan is more your bag thankyouverymuch.

3. How often do you shower/ bathe?

A) As often as I like. My most pressing concern when it comes to showers is why my farts smell worse in them.

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the nature issue

B) Once, maybe twice a day. I need my relaxation time, and sometimes I just can’t help zoning out.

C) The ocean exists for a reason.

4. You get to University by: A) Driving. My Hummer. Which is Powered by orca tears. After taking a detour to Red Rocks to run over some seals. Which I do after buying a coffee... IN A TAKEAWAY. B) I bus, but mostly out of convenience.

C) I walk/sleep at Uni anyway.

5. Do you have a vege garden?

A) The only good garden is a salted one.

B) A Vege Garden? Frankly, I’m more of a Hoegaarden person myself LMAO. C) Anything I don’t eat from my vege garden I noisily expel an hour afterwards (except for the odd cheeky pizza; five dollars at Pizza Hut, who can resist?)

6. What do you prefer to wipe yourself with?

A) Specially exclusively.

imported

tiger-fur

B) Any kind of toilet paper that’s convenient and cheap, although making one-ply illegal should be mandated by law.

C) The ocean exists for a reason.

7. Where do your thoughts lie when it comes to recycling?

A) Who can be fucked? Pretty sure it doesn’t matter anyway.

B) I’ll recycle when I can, though I won’t take assiduous pains to.

C) My belief in the good of recycling and reusing materials extends to feasting on the placentas of newborns.

8. And what about nature?

A) Survival of the fittest, man – if the ice floes can’t handle the heat, they should get out of the kitchen. And if whales are dumb enough to beach themselves or get caught in our refuse do they really deserve to coexist with us? BRUTES. B) I think nature is gorgeous, animals splendid, and the toll taken on it by mankind is awful, but, like, what am I supposed to do about it?

C) I am one with nature and have transcended to a plain ineffable to mere humans. I am fluent in marine mammal.

ANSWER HERE Q. 1

Q. 5

Q. 2

Q. 6

Q. 3

Q. 7

Q. 4

Q. 8

RESULTS MOSTLY As.

MOSTLY Bs.

Take a look around you, y’chump.

Quality of life is diminishing for animals, flora and fauna throughout the globe, global warming is nearing peak levels, Venice will be submerged by 2050, and just last year, x creatures went extinct – the writing is on the wall. Here in New Zealand, meanwhile, the Kiwi population is at a perilously low level, and The Listener write about the unsustainability of our agricultural system every slow news week without fail – most doctors’ offices bear requisite decade-old copies, so you have no excuse. It’s about time you took an interest in ways to be ecologically sound and to preserve the planet’s beauty and biosphere, if not for the next generation, then for you. Studies have confirmed a correlation between poorer health and environmental degradation, and many scientists predict that the price of food will increase as resources become more scarce. PS farts smell worse in the shower ‘cos water and methane are both coagulators and, when mixed, the potency of both increases while the water acts as a conduit. This, along with the importance of a sustainable environment, you could’ve learned in a Science class had you bothered to show up.

This is the option that I most closely align with. You want to help, and you’re very aware of the disadvantageous effects of pollution and industrialisation on the environment, but you won’t go out of your way to help the environment.

This is understandable, but myopic.

I know it’s hard, and that you have a billion things to do on the daily, but we’ve reached a stage where doing the bare minimum will no longer suffice.

By adhering to the status quo, we’re on a path to certain catastrophe, and I mean I liked Mad Max as much as anyone but the reality of it wouldn’t be pleasant for effete and weak boys like me. So, if only for my sake, take shorter showers, pick up a bit of rubbish on the street, buy environmentally sustainable where possible, and get invested in cleaning up New Zealand. Venting your ire on hapless politicians is always fun too.

MOSTLY Cs. I would say, “Give yourself a laudatory pat on the back!” but I suspect you do that at every half-available opportunity already – as the joke goes: “How can you tell if someone is Vegan? They tell you.” That said, don’t get too self-congratulatory yet.

While the environment is undoubtedly important, and the efforts you make to salvage it are commendable, don’t act like your shit don’t stink – not only is sanctimony tiresome but it’s misplaced. It’s important to remember that without social initiatives undertaken concurrently with environmental ones, you’re essentially entrenching privilege – it costs more to be ecologically friendly, and for many people that luxury just isn’t available. Focussing on the environment while there are children in New Zealand starving comes across as just the teensiest bit disingenuous, and you have to ensure that the future looks bright for all the children – not just the white middle-class ones. On the other hand, I’m probably just bitter that you’re more morally sound than I am. Kudos I guess, although it wouldn’t hurt to undreadlock your hair and wash it occasionally. Hippy.

editor@salient.org.nz

27

GENE GENIE

by Andrew Mahoney

W

hat do anti-GE campaigners and climate-change deniers have in common? Andrew Mahoney argues that both have a fundamental mistrust and ignorance of science.

They both play a dangerous role in preventing society from making progress with major environmental issues.

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W

orld hunger? Gone! Genetic and nutritional diseases? A thing of the past! It is amazing what humanity can do with genetic engineering. Yet with all these benefits, this field is sidelined and scorned by a very vocal, misinformed minority. The debate surrounding genetic engineering (GE) is synonymous with the climate debate – there are those who know the science on one hand, and people who are sceptical and ignorant on the other. Well here are the facts! GE could be the panacea society so desperately needs in the 21st Century.

The History It is a commonly held misconception that modification of food for the benefit of humans is a recent field. This is far from the truth. Throughout history, our ancestors have deliberately modified the genetics of species: cloning and selective farming are the old-school equivalents of modification in the lab. Together, these two techniques have ensured decreased prices of food that have pulled millions of humans out of starvation and poverty. Put simply, these techniques have saved lives and advanced humanity.

Cloning of plants, via cutting, has been an agricultural tool for hundreds of years. It is simple: the plant that produces the best fruit, or the most fruit, or the fastest yield of a resource, such as wood, has a branch of it cut and planted into the soil. This results in an identical plant that produces the products of the parent at the same rate.

Selective breeding, on the other hand, is the technique of choosing two individuals in a population of organisms, with desired qualities, and breeding them either naturally or, more recently, by artificial insemination. This attempts to result in the offspring having the best qualities of both their parents. This technique has been influential in a range of industries. As a result, we have astronomically increased the amount of wool, meat and milk available – and… at a cheaper price. It’s a marvel how we can double and triple yields in some of these products with the exact same amount of animals available.

Sheep and cattle today produce twice as much meat as they did in the Middle Ages – who said playing with genetics isn’t cool?

Selective breeding and cloning have been accepted in these fields for centuries. In actuality, GE is only an evolution from these techniques, not some ultra-new science as some on the side against progress would have you believe.

The Facts There are many advantages and disadvantages of GE. With the correct GE, society will be able to further develop crops and livestock that can survive extreme conditions, allowing organisms to thrive in tough environments. By taking the genes from a plant that can survive in

desert conditions, and inserting it into corn (for example), we can create a food source which can flourish in places where previously it couldn’t.

Can you imagine African deserts feeding and sustaining those in poverty? Furthermore, GE will lead to financial success for farmers in the development of organisms that can provide further increased yields of fruit, vegetables, meat and dairy.

Furthermore, genetic engineering has been very effective in the creation of vaccines and manufacturing of insulin. In vaccines, GE weakens the disease, increasing patients’ immunity. In insulin manufacturing, an insulinproducing gene has been reworked in bacteria so bacteria can produce insulin en masse. This has saved countless diabetes patients’ lives, as well as made the treatment exponentially cheaper. These developments are wonders of our age. With the use of GE, vaccines have helped to eradicate smallpox and left a whole range of other diseases on the brink of eradication, such as polio.

However, it is true that there can be disadvantages with this technique. Anti-GE groups fear the effects of GE on the basis that “it’s not natural” and “it’s not ethical”. For example, they would say that GE is wrong in that if GE salmon were to escape, they could severely disturb local ecosystems and destroy populations of other fish. They would exclaim that GE cattle shouldn’t exist because some GE species disproportionately suffer arthritis due to the increased weight on their feet. Instead of focussing on the advantages that GE reaps, they will happily regurgitate some of the drawbacks.

Obviously, there are disadvantages. But just because there are some potential downsides, it doesn’t mean we should shut down the entire operation. All these disadvantages that anti-GE groups rally on can be fixed by more human ingenuity. A simple thing like growing GE salmon in special areas, or preventing GEmodified organisms from reproducing, would solve a lot of issues. Put simply, the benefits of this science outweigh and can solve the problems with it.

creating GE T Cells derived from Stem Cells to attack lymphatic tumours.

Furthermore, the use of Genetic Engineering in the fields will one day be able to provide meat to impoverished and famished nations. The recent development of In Vitro meat (Meat grown from a petri dish) can be further enhanced to provide nutritiously-wholesome meat filled with the correct levels of carbohydrates, lipids and proteins to help nutritious diseases like Kwashiorkor (A disease caused by proteindeficiencies) in areas such as Sub-Sahara Africa.

Intuitively, GE feels wrong. It’s gross to play with nature for our own benefit. But then you realise that we have been engaging in modification for hundreds of years. And you begin to understand the true life-saving potential of science. And you start to trust the science, and realise that Genetic Engineering is the technique with endless potential to change so many peoples lives for the better. You don’t have to eat the meat grown on a plate if you don’t want to- but don’t take that chance away from a starving African child.

Success in GE •

• • • •

•

The Future Genetic engineering can literally lead to the end of starvation. Recent development of GE Crops have resulted in plants being able to grow in the desert. By the use of recombinant DNA of xerophytic plants and normal crops we can one day make the vast deserts abundant food bowls to famished nations!

Genetic engineering also is a medical marvel with the potential to cure hundreds of diseases – both genetic and environmental. Cancer may be eradicated (gene therapy is an established and clinically trialled treatment) and the reengineering of genes can lead to the eradication of genetic diseases like cystic fibrosis. Scientists have already begun this work by successfully

•

•

•

GE Salmon, with cow growth hormone: They grow larger = more meat = more product = cheaper product for consumers = more people eating healthy fish.

Transgenic tomatoes: Have a longer shelf life than regular tomatoes - the leader to more sustainable crops.

Transgenic soya beans: resistant to the herbicide Round Up. The bean survives while the weeds die - smart farming!

Transgenic sheep: Secreting antitrypsin in their milk. Sheeps are fighting Human Lung Disease!

GE Mosquitos: Mosquitos are now fighting malaria! These bloodsuckers drain the Malaria Plasmodium of life. A young child dies of malaria every 30 second- GE can put a stop to that.

GE Cattle: More meat so cheaper portions, and less of an environmental impact from farming- fewer cows producing the amount (or more) of meat means less methane farts released into the atmosphere. No bull.

GE plants: Plants are now helping to further reduce pollution. They absorb ground-water pollutants and break them down.

GE Goat: Homer Simpson may have wanted a Spider-Pig but a goat will have to do - it produces spider silk proteins from its teat - read it on the web!

GE Rose: Roses are red, Roses are...blue?

There is now a rose that produces a blue colour by producing a blue pigment, delphinidin.

editor@salient.org.nz

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FEATURE

Building A Bridge

by Sam Prime

“The only way forward, if we are going to improve the quality of the environment, is to get everybody involved”

— Richard Rogers (Award-winning British architect)

L

ast year, I was at a bit of a loss as for what to do, not ready to start University, but at the same time not wanting to sit around at home twiddling my thumbs. After some deep and meaningful conversations with the wise elders known as

30

Mum and Dad, I decided a bit of travelling was in order, but where should I go? Normal backpacking just wouldn’t cut it for me; I wanted to be able to look back on my travels and feel a sense of pride with what I had done. So onto Google I went. It didn’t take long before I came across ‘Raleigh International’, an England-based charity, which takes 17–25 year olds to less fortunate countries than theirs and gets them doing projects to help local communities and the environment.

Skip forward a few months, and I found myself standing in the middle of Imbak Canyon, Borneo. Our group’s job was to construct the second part of

a suspension bridge spanning the river. Once the bridge was completed, it would allow scientists and rangers easy access to the other side where they could observe previously uncharted virgin rainforest. While this may seem like a pointless exercise, putting a bridge in the rainforest, the information that has been collected from the newly accessible forest has provided a valuable insight. The population numbers of some of the rare wildlife are slowly rising.

The animals are returning to the surrounding area after many decades of intense logging.

As the project was all about helping the environment while causing as little disruption to

the surrounding area as possible, the only power tool in use was a chainsaw. Also, only trees that had fallen by natural causes could be used in the project: this meant that wherever the trees fell, we would have to drag them up to the building site using nothing more than some winches we made onsite and a bit of muscle, which was no easy feat as each log weighed around 2 tons. Once the trees had been moved into position, the rangers would get to work cutting them into shape and making sure all the measurements were correct. Once all the pieces were assembled and fixed into their intended positions, the bases of them were buried in 8 ft–deep Photography by Sam Prime

FEATURE

“Just last year, a herd of pygmy elephants were spotted passing through, orangutans have been heard in the treetops, and macaques have been seen using the bridges to pass over the river. ”

pits surrounded by a mixture of rocks and soil to support them. Thick cables attached to surrounding trees then secured the logs in place.

During the month or so I spent in the rainforest working on the bridge, our group managed to successfully build one side of the structure while also stabilising the path up to the site for future groups. While I was out in Borneo, two other groups travelled to Imbak and worked on the bridge, managing to complete the other side and also construct pathways from the rangers’ camp to the bridge itself.

Three other groups travelled to neighboring Danum Valley, and worked on similar projects with

equal success. If all goes well, the bridge should be finished this year and we will have successfully done our bit to help keep the rainforest safe for a while longer.

The long-term goal is to teach the local people that the wildlife that surrounds them is something to admire and protect, not kill and sell for a quick paycheck; progress is slow, but change can be seen already with a notable drop in poaching crimes.

A couple of years ago, if you walked through Imbak Canyon, you probably wouldn’t have seen much apart from the occasional insect. This was due to the extensive logging and hunting in the area. Since 1975, Borneo has lost around 25 per cent of

its rainforests, and population numbers of some of the animals like the Pygmy Elephant have dropped by 50 per cent. But now, thanks to the work of local rangers and volunteer groups such as Raleigh, animals are gradually reclaiming the area.

Just last year, a herd of pygmy elephants were spotted passing through, orangutans have been heard in the treetops, and macaques have been seen using the bridges to pass over the river.

Penalties for hunting any of the wildlife range from a $5,000 fine up to ten years in prison. While the work is far from over, the positives are far outweighing the negatives at this point in time.

Most people understand the

need for a change in the way we treat the environment. But few will do anything more than liking a picture on Facebook of some cute monkey about to go extinct, or chucking their beer bottles in the recycling. While not everyone has the time or urge to go to such an extreme and go to the rainforest, there are many other ways to do your part: whether it be helping to replant some native plants in your weekend, or even just walking somewhere instead of driving. If we carry on the way we are going, future generations will never know the beauty of the rainforests, or get to see an orangutan for themselves. It’s time to step up and make a difference. editor@salient.org.nz

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LI VI NG C AMPU S V

ictoria University has taken up the commitment of a living wall, located on the Maclaurin building, as a part of the Council’s Our Living City programme. The programme is intended to connect Wellingtonians with nature.

The green wall is a combination of

native ferns, grasses and plants designed to handle our weather’s temperament.

The project is a step towards a more environmentally aware University, and a sign of VUW’s commitment to raising the profile of environmental issues across the University.

editor@salient.org.nz

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ECONNECT

BY K R I S T I N K I LG O U R

C

onstructed using a Woven Image material, Econnect is environmentally friendly and light weight so the form is easy to manoeuvre around. The material is 60% recycled PET, low VOC, contains no adhesives, and is highly durable and 100% recyclable after use.

WOV E N S TO O L

BY J E F F B A R T L E T T

C

onstructed using offcuts, Bartlett’s Woven Stool reduces workshop wastage. Bartlett’s stool was featured in the ‘Make It’ exhibition earlier in the year at Te Aro Campus.

INFILL HOUSE

BY O L I V E R S Y M E

T

he architecture denotes how form can be twisted and torn through lending itself to the built environment and site context. The building consists of living quarters below, with a private studio tiered above. The composition of spaces work to create a transition from built form to naturally expressing the mood of the architect as he moves throughout the house.

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the nature issue

IN N OVATIV E S T UDEN TS FIRST LIGHT HOUSE ON SHOW IN WELLINGTON.

A

lmost a year ago, a group of 26 VUW students and 12 staff designed and built one of the most remarkable steps in student architecture. If you haven’t already marvelled at it, it’s the Kiwi bach known as the First Light House. It’s powered solely by sunrays and received the NZ Institute of Architects International Award. The bach is now down at Waimarama Beach in Hawke’s Bay. In 2012, four of the student team leaders, along with Senior Lecturer Guy Marriage, formed the architectural service company First Light Studio Limited. The company’s vision is to search for a more efficient way of life.

That is a life empowered by the natural world. It is a relief to hear of companies like First Light that share the same concern and care for the environment as their customers.

SASHA FRANCIS

T

his photo is actually from behind Vic on campus, down near the back VUWSA Carparks on the way to the indoor soccer field and Boyd Wilson – go figure. I was rushing to work one morning through Uni and the plaque caught my eye, so I had to stop. I did a paper called “Power and Bureaucracy” last year which was amazing and talked about how rational things can ultimately end up being irrational, especially within bureaucracy, and all of the imbalances of power that we live within, and even though I was five minutes late to work, it was worth it to take that shot because it sort of summed the whole paper up into a single real-life event, you know? I hope that carpark was worth it, but in reality, it probably hardly gets used. editor@salient.org.nz

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INTERVIEW

Holly Walker

by Duncan & Cam

Holly Walker is a Green list MP in the Hutt South electorate. She came to our disorganised (creative) Salient office.

She dressed casually and maintained a confident passion throughout. When she was born, her mum was on the DPB, and since then, she has studied at Oxford as a Rhodes Scholar. Duncan and Cam talked to her about her life and politics as an environmentalist.

D&C: How do you get to work?

H: Usually I catch the bus. [No 81. Walker lives in Petone, and biked to the train station last Wednesday for the first time since having her baby.]

D&C: Lunch?

H: My stock lunch is a chicken and almond sandwich and an Indonesian rice salad from Wishbone.

D&C: Do you have a vege garden?

H: I have a herb garden. My house is actually called Herb Cottage. The previous owner who lived there for over 20 years was a herbalist and a massage therapist. She has an amazing herb garden with about 45 different herbs in it. [Walker’s mum tends to the garden for her.]

D&C: Do you use organic food?

H: Yup not 100% exclusively but yes we do.

And generally that’s because it tastes better.

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the nature issue

D&C: Favourite café?

H: Go Bang in Petone: does a great scrambled eggs with feta and oregano.

D&C: Have you ever smoked pot?

H: Yeah, of course.

D&C: What do you personally do to reduce your carbon footprint?

H: Public transport, obviously. Before I was pregnant [Walker has a five-month-old] I used to always bike into town. So my goal is to get back to doing that but, you know, small steps. And with the baby obviously there is heaps of potential waste, so we are doing all cloth nappies, and when she starts on solids we won’t be buying pre-packaged baby foods. She’ll just eat whatever we’re eating. Lots of people can fall into the trap of driving their babies around to get them to fall to sleep because they only sleep when they are in constant motion. So we go for walks instead which is good exercise for us as well. So around having a baby there are a whole lot of decisions we have made to be as environmental as possible.

D&C: If you could be Queen for one day and could pass one law to improve the environment, what would it be?

H: It depends if you are thinking about the global picture or the picture here in New Zealand. Because I think we need to address the elephant in the room, climate change.

And, you know, NZ needs to be a leader, so we need a better system than the ETS that we have at present. We need to show that we can take global leadership on that. But if

I am allowed to say something else as well, then it would be setting limits for pollution in rivers, and setting limits for what water we can take out of rivers for irrigation purposes.

I know that the Government is moving in that direction, but the limits they are setting are so laughably weak that they will actually allow us to pollute the rivers more before we have the limit that they are setting. And clearly we need to clean them up, and so we need to get a lower limit and work towards getting to that. So that would be the other one.

D&C: One event that helped prepare you for political life?

H: [When editor of Critic, the Otago Uni student paper,] we published a fictional diary of a drug rapist. It was pretty out-there and offensive. We kind of argued at the time that it was for the purposes of education and, you know, making people more aware of watching their drinks, but it would have been, if you were a victim of rape, incredibly traumatising.

It was deemed to be objectionable. It is illegal to have a copy. For me, it was a really good learning experience. I mean, I defended the decision at the time, but I have subsequently come to the conclusion that it was the wrong decision. But it meant that I had to defend it in the national media. And it was really good practice for me for being a politician, both having to defend a decision you’ve made, and then actually on reflection being able to say that it was the wrong decision. Those are both important things that politicians need to be able to do.

Plotting Plants

by Phoebe Morris

I

have recently come to accept that as much as I would like to think that I am an ‘environmentalist’, in reality, I can barely keep a household pot plant alive.

I populate my living space with leafy companions in a feeble attempt to display to my friends and flatmates my allegiance to the natural world. However, it is what my greenwashed peers do not see that is the ultimate summary of my true apathy towards the state of the planet. The average lifespan of a plant unfortunate enough to find itself rooted in my room is somewhere between two days and two weeks. I call myself a friend to tree, leaf and loping critter, yet I cannot even keep a novelty-sized succulent from shrivelling into a miserable husk.

Like planet Earth, I believe my indoor plants are meeting their demise through a dreadful mix of neglect and general

misunderstanding. I try to give my them special fertiliser to help them grow, yet proceed to thoroughly overdose the soil, thereby leaving it uninhabitable. Some are inundated with fresh water, while others, accidentally forgotten, are left parched in the corner. Unintentionally inadequate drainage condemn some to a slow rotting death. I want to keep them alive, I truly do, but sometimes it is easier to check Facebook than to whisper sweet nothings to your Peace Lily and give it the repotting it so desperately needs.

Although, when considering the fate of these leafy genteel, I cannot help but consider putting some of the blame onto the previous owner. Is it Bunnings’ fault that this one did not make it? Did California Home & Garden put something strange in the potting mix? Is this all a farce to make me

come back and buy more? Such is the case when I consider many of the overwhelming issues facing our planet today, and the generations prior that allowed things to get so out of hand.

Past aside, my pot plants are dead and the environment is fucked. Having confronted the reality of my apathetic nature, I have resolved to turn over a new leaf. No more will I call myself an ‘environmentalist’ or think myself ‘greener’ than people who forget to bring their reusable shopping bags to Countdown. Truly helping the environment begins with the realisation that, in spite of your new compost bin, you are probably doing jack-all to save the planet. In light of this epiphany, I can only hope that my true motivation to take meaningful action will come back to life and bloom like that geranium I owned in 2012. editor@salient.org.nz

37

SPORT

Sports banter with sammy p “The League”

A

ahh, the Premier League. Arguably the best sporting competition on the globe.

It is home to some of the world’s most iconic teams and players, has some of the highestquality and competitive football that Europe has to offer, and provides us with a thrilling theatre of drama week in, week out. This time last year, Sir Alex’s Manchester United were proving themselves true champions by dominating the league before eventually claiming the title with four rounds remaining.

However, one year is a hell of a long time in football, and this season we have seven weeks remaining with four teams in the title race… and Man U isn’t one of them.

According to the bookies, Manchester City are the current title favourites. However, Manuel Pellegrini has never won a major trophy in Europe, and his City side has recently exited Europe and been knocked out of the FA Cup by Wigan for the second year in a row. They’re also struggling at the back at the wrong end of the season, with defensive linchpin Vincent Kompany in poor form and without a solid defensive partner, so a spirited effort is required in order for City to fulfil their title aspirations.

The return of the Special One filled Chelsea faithful with plenty of hope at the start of the season, and José Mourinho has exceeded expectation with the Blues currently perched on top of the Premier League ladder.

Although their strikers aren’t firing, the everpresent attacking dangers of Eden Hazard and Oscar, an impressive defensive partnership 38

the nature issue

of the reborn John Terry and Gary Cahill, and the easiest run-in out of the four title challengers, ensures that Chelsea has every bit of potential to blow the League wide open in the weeks to come.

There are a lot of things that exert pressure in football: the media, fans, a demanding schedule… but an empty trophy cabinet is perhaps the biggest incentive for teams to perform, and there are not many cabinets out there emptier than Arsenal’s. Arsène Wenger’s side is one of English football’s most prestigious clubs, and this year presents a genuine opportunity for the Gunners to return to glory by claiming a League title (an FA Cup is also in the offing). However, the absence of some key players to injury and the lack of a prolific striker severely weaken Arsenal’s title challenge.

Like Arsenal, Liverpool is a traditional giant of English football that has seen limited success in recent years. However, I believe the smart money is on Liverpool to nab the title on the final Sunday. Not many teams have the ability to humble Manchester United 3–0 at Old Trafford. Furthermore, not many teams have the attacking potency of Liverpool – if the SAS (Suarez and Sturridge) can continue their red-hot form in the weeks to come, then there’s no reason why the Reds can’t restore some Liverpudlian pride by claiming the trophy.

I n W e ll i n g t on t h i s w e e k – Ollie Ritchie previews two c lu tc h g a m e s ta k i n g p l ac e i n t h e c a pi ta l t h i s we e k .

Warriors vs Tigers, Saturday, 5 pm, Cake Tin: Robbie Farah’s Tigers travel to Wellington for the Warriors’ second home game of 2014.

Another poor start to the season will look to be turned around in the capital – look for a big game from Shaun Johnson and Sam Tomkins, and a much-improved performance from the wings who have been poor so far.

M y p i c k : Wa r r i o r s 1 – 1 2 .

Wellington Phoenix vs Adelaide United, Sunday, 3 pm, Cake Tin: The Phoenix will be looking for a big win at home against Adelaide United, who sit just two spots and three points above the ‘Nix. The Phoenix are going to have to step it up a gear this time around as they continue to push for a playoff spot – a draw will not be good enough. As coach Ernie Merrick said, he believes in this team and believes they can still make a push for the playoffs.

M y p i c k : D r aw .

Top 5 SPORTS FILMS

. Cool R u n n i n g s : This timeless classic is what makes the Jamaican bobsled team so iconic. It also consolidates the stereotype of Jamaican people being GCs.

5

. C o a c h C a r t e r : If you’re looking for an inspirational Hollywood storyline about some hoodlum high-school hoops, then this is the way to go. Samuel L. Jackson is pretty badass too.

4

.G r e e n S t r e e t H o o l i g a n s : Although Elijah Wood is way too much of a pussy to suit being a football hooligan, GSH is still a classic film about some gnarly-as British thugs to whom the round ball means everything.

3

. S p a c e J a m : Anything with Michael Jordan in it is going to be pretty swell, and Space Jam is no exception. It makes it even sweller how he teams up with Bugs Bunny and the Looney Tunes crew on the basketball court to defeat an evil team of aliens.

2

. R e m e m b e r t h e T i t a n s : It had to be a football movie, didn’t it?

And there’s no greater football film then Remember the Titans. Coach Boone (Denzel Washington) successfully unites a racially divided high-school team and, in doing so, unites a community.

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COLUMN

The Sweet Scoop W i t h J ul i a W e ll s r o c k m e l o n i n s ta n t i c e c r e a m

T

his ice cream has a bit of history to it.

When I was eight, I spent some time in Italy. It’s a good place to be as a child (and, honestly, probably any time): I was petted and constantly fed, particularly ice cream. Although my memory of the art is nonexistent, I can still describe individual ice creams I had during that period. This is one of them.

It is based off a rock-melon gelato that I had in Venice, which I immediately decided was the best ice-cream flavour in the world. Since then, I haven’t found it again. I can’t say this became a pressing concern or disappointment in my life, but I did think of it occasionally. In my mid-teens, I finally decided to recreate it.

And do you know what? Unlike McDonald’s sundaes and Rainbow’s End, it was as good as I remembered, with a delicate, mild, fragrant flavour.

This version isn’t a traditional, milk-based gelato; however, the naturally creamy consistency of the rock melon makes it a pretty good substitute. It’s also healthy, fast, and doesn’t need an ice-cream maker. You can use other fruit for this recipe, as long as it has strong flavour, isn’t too full of seeds, and you adjust the sugar quantity. rock melon instant ice cream

• • •

( serves 2)

2 cups rock-melon flesh (rind and seeds removed) scant ½ cup icing sugar ¼ cup milk (you can also use cream or yoghurt)

Slice rock melon into little cubes, and freeze overnight. The next day, blend into fine crumbs in a food processor. Add icing sugar and blend until mixed. Slowly dribble in the milk, blending while you do. Stop when mixture is smooth and ice-cream-like. Serve immediately.

Conspiracy Corner “ N ucl e ar Z e a land ” B y I nco g n i t o M on t o y a

O

ne of the defining moments of New Zealand history was the establishment of the Nuclear Free Zone in 1987, which prevented nuclear weapons from entering our waters and helped establish the country’s green identity. The controversies around the enactment of the law have made Kiwis consider discussion on anything nuclear to be similarly radioactive. With viable nuclear power having a bit of recent upswing in public support globally, is our own anti-nuclear stance holding us back or saving us from catastrophe? The answer is more monstrous than you think.

Nuclear fission is so easy these days, even a child could do it. Earlier this month, American teen Taylor Wilson built a safe and completely functional compact nuclear reactor for his science fair, designed to burn up old Cold War weapons and convert their radioactive material into energy.

New Zealand’s only claim to nuclear power was a reactor built in 1962 by the University of Canterbury, originally obtained from the USA’s “Atoms for Peace” program (an Orwellian name if there ever was one). It was eventually decommissioned in 1981.

Having a nuclear power plant in New Zealand in reality would be a question of logistics and safety. There is no viable location for such a plant in the country, and due to our size and sparseness of urban centres, we would simply produce more power than we would ever need. And as we learnt with Fukushima, it would be a massive risk to our environment to have a nuclear power plant in an area prone to natural disasters.

Which brings me to the conspiracy at heart, one that goes back to before New Zealand was even settled. According to Māori mythology, earthquakes are caused by the god Rūaumoko,

an unborn deity that is still nestled in the womb of the Earth Mother, the “belly bump” being Mount Taranaki, from which his kicks resonate and cause the earth to shake. Should nuclear power come back to New Zealand and upset our delicate ecosystem, I believe a reciprocal attack by this godling is imminent.

The idea of giant subterranean monsters is usually dismissed today as superstition, but the ancients considered them as fact. They lived in harmony with the environment so as not to incur their wrath, a fact that has only recently been recalled today. Legendary Pictures’ upcoming documentary Godzilla is one such example, warning us that if we don’t change our nature-harming ways, we’ll soon be smelling the uranium on the breath of a 500-foot dinosaur.

So please, for the love of Godzilla, go green.

Incognito out.

editor@salient.org.nz

39

COLUMN

H ow

to

S u rv i v e t h e W i n t e r A L O N E

This is probably one of our most resourceheavy exercises, and so I have gone to the effort of providing you with a materials list.

Everything on it is of course optional, because you should under no circumstances let some girl you’ve never met tell you how to live your life. (If you have met me, you definitely need to do what I say because I am the reason you don’t want to be around people anymore.)

S h i rt & Sw e e t

M at e r i al s : • • •

w i t h E l e a n o r M e rt o n y ou r w e e k ly colu m n on how t o b e annoy e d b u t s t i ll cu t e .

A

s the winter months approach with all of their grey shades and people wearing beanies who shouldn’t, it is easy to rely on the warmth of human company to get through.

This is, aside from a rise in population-wide mucus levels, one of the biggest problems with winter. Human company is awful.

Especially when you’re high. You don’t know what other people are thinking, but you’re pretty sure it’s about how you’re doing weird things with your facial muscles and you really really want like a warm tamarillo smoothie, maybe with chocolate chips, in and around your mouth right now, but you feel like that wouldn’t be socially acceptable. This is why it is very important to shun other people as much as possible and instead direct your shirtiness towards being cute for your own sake. Make yourself say awww, and then break something. Do it for yourself. Learn:

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the nature issue

•

• •

•

Duvets. Feather duvets wherever possible. As many as possible.

Also pillows. Feather pillows.

Also feathers. Peacock feathers are best, because they make you think the word ‘cock’, which is funny, and also they make you look extravagant which is important if you actually do encounter another human being.

One of those cross-stitch kits that spell out a swear word or are a picture of genitalia or something. I think you can probably get them on Etsy, although I don’t really know what Etsy sells. An alternative to this is possibly setting up an Etsy shop selling stuff that people who shop on Etsy want to buy, and just getting rich all winter. That’ll teach other people.

Whatever body-maintenance resources you need (hygiene).

Whatever body-maintenance resources you need (food).

• Suggestions include mostly stuff that isn’t green. Appropriate colours include blue, red and yellow.

Whatever body-maintenance resources you need (alcohol/drugs/both).

• Winter-appropriate types of

these include Baileys, Kahlúa and mulled wine, because you can have them warm. Bonus points for mulled wine because you have to be all cute and craftsy to make it. Weed, because it encourages you to put on a winter layer and is good for watching movies, and MDMA, because it’s just a really good trans-seasonal drug.

Essentially, once you’re shirty enough at everyone else to want to be cute just for yourself, all you have to do is follow my instructions. Take all of the ingredients from the above list that struck your fancy, put them in and around you (readers’ discretion what goes where) and probably just kind of roll around a bit. Alternate this activity with the development of weird habits pertaining to your own body. Possibilities include but are not limited to: building things out of your excess nail-growth (see Etsy shop setup suggestion), braiding your flatmates’ rubbish into your hair, and extreme ‘nek level’ hypochondria which involves actually trying to induce the symptoms of the disease you are convinced that you have.

Imagine that three months have passed.

Winter is now over. You emerge from your cave of feelings and substance abuse. Your social skills feel weak and floppy like old lettuce. So do most of your muscles. So does your hair. You are now a weak and floppy lettuce-creature. But the important thing, dear lettuce-creature, is that you are cute.

You are the cutest lettuciest creature I’ve ever seen, and you did all that cute for you. You are now ready to face the tepid climes of spring.

Reward yourself with some low-to-mid-level human interaction, but remember, don’t go overboard. People are still the worst.

Finally, I would just like to point out that it is a complete coincidence that these are also things that help you through a breakup.

SEX

The Bone Zone W I T H C U P I E H O ODW I N K

W

ell well well, it looks like it’s that time of the year when you’re all desperate to hook up but not quite desperate enough to actually go out and find someone who you don’t already know – or worse, already know and live with.

Just like any social rule that is oft-cited and delightfully rhyming (“Beer before liquor, never sicker”; “If it’s yellow, let it mellow”), there is certainly some truth to it – you didn’t think people just said it ‘cause it sounds fun, did you?

That being said, many rules are meant to be broken, and the sanctity of ‘Don’t screw the crew’ largely depends on what exactly you mean by ‘screw’, and the nature of your relationship with said ‘crew’.

For example, if by ‘screw’ you mean screw in the context of a serious relationship because you’ve suddenly realised, à la My Best Friend’s Wedding, that your BFF is, in fact, your soulmate, then an exception to the rule may be in order.

After all, a strong friendship is a great basis for any relationship. However, if ‘screw’ is more closely

aligned with “I’m lonely, horny, and banging my flatmate means I don’t even have to leave the house to get some”, then it may be best that you heed the word of the golden rule.

Secondly, and more importantly, the nature of your relationship with your intended screwee must be considered. Is this someone you see almost every day, and share everything with, or are we talking more a friend-of-a-friend situation?

The key things to ask yourself are how much you value the relationship, how much you think sex will change the relationship, and whether the benefits of the screw outweigh the value of the crew. After all, Sunday brunch with your besties will never be the same when aioli is no longer the only white viscous fluid you’ve shared.

If you’re already living with the apple of your eye, your choice will be hugely affected by where you’re living. In a Hall situation, you’ve got a lot more leeway than in a flat, largely because you’ve got 300+ other residents, 20 floors of bedrooms, and a multitude of lounge rooms to assist you in avoiding each other if everything turns to custard. Friendships ebb and flow throughout the year in halls, so regardless of whether you bang your bestie from O-Week, chances are you won’t be talking to them by the time the year is out, anyway. And besides, it’d be cruel to deny yourself such a significant portion of Wellington’s eligible hotties.

However, if you’re in a flatting situation and have been making eyes over a mound of dirty dishes, I suggest you get out that lease you signed just a few weeks ago and have a good, hard look at it. Does it say “Fixed-Term Lease” anywhere on the document? If it does, this means you’re locked in until that lease ends (usually a year after you signed on. As in, a really long time to avoid someone when you’re both living in a tiny flat.) Remember, there’s plenty more fish in the proverbial sea, fish who don’t happen to live four metres away from you, and will continue to live there for the foreseeable future.

Be wise, Cupie xx

Mate, first things first, you gotta stop with the tape. Trust me, there are solutions to your situation that don’t involve you having to razz your balls every time you want to bang.

What you do with the jewels when you’re getting jiggy is largely a matter of personal preference. Leaving them out and swinging free can add a new dynamic to your sex life. If you’re doing a lady friend from behind, for example, get the momentum right and your balls will swing forward and stimulate her clit as you thrust. Look ma, no hands! The added rhythmic slapping of yer sack against your partner’s flesh might also add a lil somethin’ somethin’ to your sexy time.

But this baller lifestyle ain’t for everyone. If your flat has particularly thin walls, a cacophony of ball-slaps may contribute less to your sex life than it does to keeping your flatmates up at night.

If you’re a big baller, you may find the free-balling approach a little uncomfortable. If this is the case, you could try a different position, one where the pull of gravity on your scrote is a little less extreme – with you lying on your back or side. If this ain’t your style, you can still harness those ‘nads – but do it with a non-adhesive material so you don’t have to give yourself an impromptu Brazilian every time you’re finished with the tape. You could try keeping your jocks on and just popping your D out of that convenient hole they put in the front of male underwear.

Happy slapping, Cupie xx

Cupie wat do u do wif the balls during loving? Inside/outside? I hAv Been use

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G o t a b u r n i n g q u e s t i on f o r C u p i e ? A s k h e r a b ou t all m at t e r s o f t h e h e a rt … an d o t h e r r o m an t i c o r g an s anon y m ou s ly at a s k . f m / C u p i e H oo d w i n k Got

a b u r n i n g s e n s at i on i n y ou r

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Give Student 463 5308, o r t h e i r cl i n i c s at K e l Pipitea.

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tape to keep them from swinging thank you

editor@salient.org.nz

41

COLUMN

The environmental movement is hardly new. Concern for the future of the climate and forest creatures didn’t manifest from an LSD vision in the 1960s. Environmentalism was in fact a product of the very ‘man’ that hippies so despised.

H istory Th at H as n ’ t Happe ned Y e t It’s the Nature of History.

N

one of us are oblivious to the state of our environment. Unless you are some sort of Holocaust-denying, apocalypse-believing mad woman, it’s generally accepted that global warming is a thing. That’s not to say that our treatment of the environment is justifiable. Nor is it to say that it is not a grave issue in itself.

Rather, concern for the environment existed even before Al Gore, and his grandparents for that matter. Indeed, policies that went beyond the agreed goal to ‘not fuck any more shit up’ have existed, seemingly, for quite a while now.

Weir d inter ne t sh i t Wi th H e n ry & P h i l i p

U

nless you’ve been living under a particularly large rock, you will have heard about HBO’s new series True Detective. Part of the credit for its sudden and dramatic ubiquity in the social consciousness is due to the internet.

Shows like True Detective – emotionally complex, mysterious and innovative – bring out the very best in internet discourse. Investigating critiques and abounding opinions become just as much of the thrill as the TV show. For a while there, my Mondays were devoted to the next episode, while the rest of my week was devoted to reading theories, reviews and criticism.

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the nature issue

Between 1890 and the Great Depression (1930s–1940s for those of you playing at home), people began to see the world as no longer an inexhaustible supplier of resources. In the 1890s, as part of Britain’s colonial project in North America, India and South Africa, Britain sent scientists and physicians to recently colonised islands to study the deforestation and climate change already occurring. The environment was looked at with colonising in mind, with preserving it necessary in order to continue ruling. Debate surrounding deforestation was even seen under Charles II in England in 1669 and Louis XIV of France.

Putting the history of Western greed and civilisation aside for a moment, there have

A particular article I’d like to draw your attention to is ‘A “True Detective” Reading List’, published on BuzzFeed after the season’s conclusion. While I am condescendingly adverse to clickbaity sites like BuzzFeed most of the time, this particular article proved an exception.

It provides not just a comprehensive list of all the texts alluded to in the series, but also more of an ‘extra for experts’ kind of thing if you want to explore texts that also deal with the show’s themes. So alongside Lovecraft is Nietzsche (“Rust Cohle paraphrases Thus Spake Zarathustra in the series’ fifth episode”) and Roberto Bolano’s 2666, which deals with serial murders against women in a manner “as bleak and nightmarish as anything on TV”. I love the intersecting geekdoms of the piece. The way it uses True Detective as a launching pad to encourage further enquiry in a way that avoids being didactic and lets you take your own route. This sort of gentle inquiry is something the internet needs more of. Also, there are some great and apt recommendations on display; boi knows his shit. http://www.buzzfeed.com/lincolnmichel/a-truedetective-reading-list

existed philosophies and spiritual beliefs that see the land not as something we just exist on, but rather something we have a privilege to co-exist with. In ancient Greece, Herodotus “believed works like bridges and canals demonstrated an overarching human pride that might call forth punishment from the Gods”. This is not dissimilar to the spiritual bond Māori feel with Papatūānuku and the air as taonga derived from Ranginui.

Over time, each era has put its own imprint on environmentalism. Although in New Zealand, many would identify our environmental quest with the Green Party and the knock-on effect of Earth Day/anti-nuclear sentiment in the United States, some themes have continued. I suppose what I’m saying is that if even Louis XIV cared about the trees, and his country LITERALLY REVOLTED against him, BP should probably get that oil out of the Gulf of Mexico already.

by Nicola Braid

Speaking of comprehensive reading lists, the good folk over at bookreviews.me.uk published the ‘Rory Gilmore Reading Challenge’ – a precise list which compiles every book that Rory ever read over the course of Gilmore Girls.

That someone took the time to collate the data is astounding in itself, and comparing yourself to a fictional idol in tangible parameters is always fun (I felt a peculiar combination of smugness and inadequacy). What I most like about it, though, is that it reminds us that when we encounter a piece of media, it doesn’t ‘end’ when we turn the telly off or close the book. We take our favourite art around with us, whether we know it or not, and with the power of imagination we can sustain that magical feeling of going to Stars Hollow. These characters aren’t real but they are fleshed-out, and it’s a testament to Gilmore Girls that people want to and do take this quiz in earnest. Also: it’s just really fucking fun. bookreviews.me.uk/rory-gilmore-reading-challenge

by Philip McSweeney

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Friday afternoons from 3pm - close editor@salient.org.nz

43

FILM

ARTS 3 Mile Limit Directed by Craig Newland

The Monuments Men Directed by George Clooney

Review by Emma Hurley

Review by Charlotte Doyle

T

A

he debut feature of director Craig Newland, 3 Mile Limit has made a strong start.

It has won Officially Selection into 11 International Film Festivals, and picked up three awards at the time of print.

Based on a true story, familiar to our parents and theirs, but in need of introduction to our generation.

Lead character Richard (Matt Whelan) tells the New Zealand government “all you play is music by dead people”. Exasperated by the lack of variety in radio, he gathers sales executive Alex (Elliot Wrightson), engineer Morrie (James Crompton) and a team of DJs: Nick (Dan Musgrove), Brendon (Carl Dixon), Tim (Daniel Cresswell) and Paul (Jordan Mooney), to make a change.

They decide to form their own independent rock’n’roll station.

A series of conflicts, namely from the New Zealand government, prevents this from happening. The determined crew set out to broadcast from a ship in international waters, outside of the 3-mile limit (hence the name).

The most notable performances are Matt Whelan as Richard and Elliot Wrightson as Alex. Whelan, known from Go Girls and The Most Fun You Can Have Dying, gives a strong portrayal of the leadership and determination shown by the original founder. This is coupled with great anxiety when his dream and relationship with his wife Judy (Belinda Crawley) encounter conflicts. Wrightson gives a powerful and convincing performance as the suave, shrewd sales executive, Alex. He is a match to Whelan’s capability, and proves that he is one to watch in the New Zealand film scene.

3 Mile Limit is reflective of its 1960s time scheme: the furniture is drab, the technology is old-school and the outfits are smooth.

The soundtrack (composed by Tom McLeod) is sleek. An eclectic mix that conveys the moods of rebellion, romance and tension. It also includes some New Zealand ‘60s tracks, and adds energy and context to the film.

3 Mile Limit is nostalgic, engaging and important. It appeals to the ideals of rebellion, ingenuity and collective purpose. Scenes of storms, arguments and adventure are contrasted with a romantic sub-plot. It is a film you could enjoy with your friends, or you could take your parents too: should be easy enough to persuade them to shout you a ticket.

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h o w c l o o n e y s av e d m o d e r n c u lt u r e

the nature issue

s far as narcissists go, George Clooney does pretty well for himself. In managing to sell sex in Nespresso ads (he makes that coffee sooo drinkable, it’s why I bought one), The Monuments Men proved to be a solid building block in Clooney’s ego. The film featured too many shots of him driving an army car onehanded in Ray-Bans wearing a pretentious moustache. Being the co-writer, producer, director and star of this feature, when Clooney’s character quips about Hitler that “he wanted everything”, it seems somewhat hypocritical. However, as he so thoughtfully states, he is playing the man in charge of saving the “achievements of humanity”, so maybe we should cut him some slack.

The movie is based on true events poignantly captured by Robert M. Edsel in a novel of the same name. It centres on the extraordinary art crimes committed by the Nazis during WWII, and the group of volunteers who fought to stop them in an effort to preserve Europe’s culture. Clooney revealed in an interview his original desire was to strut around in a WWII movie. This story conveniently provided a novel way to do this, with the added bonus of giving him the opportunity to demonstrate he’s not “just a pretty face” by spouting painfully poetic voiceovers involving metaphors about ash and dust. Unsurprisingly, the objective of recovering lost art gets a little bit lost itself, for the sake of Clooney slamming empty bullet shells onto maps of Germany.

As a movie in general, the music drives your emotions crazy, with anticlimactic releases after two minutes of tense violins. Matt Damon is annoying, and it’s unconvincing that he’s ever been to the MET let alone been its director. Cate Blanchett reminds you of her Australian origins when her French/bordering-on-Germanic accent slips halfway through. A dead guy blinks; attention to detail.

However, I will give Clooney some credit. Casting Bill Murray was an excellent choice, revealing the ability to screech a fantastically hilarious “Holy shit”. The blatant cigarette promotion is also somewhat successful where you emerge with the conclusion that in moments of conflict, offering around a smoke is an incredibly effective way of keeping the peace.

A work of art? Not really. Is it genuine? Doubtful. Has Clooney proved he can do more than be an irresistible force of attractiveness?

Depends if his husky voice is enough to win you over. While it would be interesting to see if he knows what a Gustav Klimt painting actually is, I do like the fact that at least he seems to care.

BOOKS

A G UIDE TO N Z LITERARY J OURNALS

by Nina Powles

Y

es, there are literary journals in this country! Yes, people read them.

No, they’re not pretentious or dull, or only contributed to by old, white men. Yes, they’re friendly and quite wonderful. If you’re a bit of a creative writer and you want to get your short stories, memoirs, essays or poems out there into the world, think about submitting to any or all of these publications. Literary journals are most keen to publish new work that hasn’t been published before – keep in mind that some won’t even accept a piece that’s appeared on your personal blog before. Read their submission guidelines thoroughly, have a look at past issues to get an idea of what they publish, and it never hurts to get an extra pair of eyes (or two) to look over your work. And if you’re burning to read more from young, emerging New Zealand writers, there’s no better place to look.

SPORT A bedrock of new New Zealand fiction, essays and poetry. Published annually and edited by VUP’s Fergus Barrowman. Accepts contributions from new and already-published New Zealand writers, or those with “a New Zealand connection”. Sport 42, released last week, features work

by Bill Manhire, Elizabeth Knox, and past Salient editor Uther Dean.

Past copies are all available online through the Electronic Text Centre.

Submissions: No current deadline, though the next Sport won’t be out until early next year and submissions are welcome. http://www.sportmagazine.co.nz/about LANDFALL The country’s longest-running and best-known journal. It publishes fiction, poetry, biographical and critical essays, cultural commentary, and artwork. It’s published every six months by Otago University Press and also runs an annual essay competition, as well as a biannual award for an original, previously unpublished collection of poetry. Back issues are only available in print; try Arty Bees or Quilter’s.

Submissions: Next deadline 10 June. Entries for 2014 essay competition close 31 July. http://www.otago.ac.nz/press/landfall/index.html TURBINE An online journal published annually by VUW’s International Institute of Modern Letters, often presenting new work by creative-writing students of the IIML as well as from established writers. A great place to try if you’ve never been published before. They publish fiction, poetry and non-fiction, and all past issues are available online.

Submissions: After 1 July but before 20 October. http://www.victoria.ac.nz/modernletters/resources/turbine HUE & CRY A copy of Hue & Cry is like a work of modern art in bound paper form.

It’s based in Wellington and presents new writers and artists, published annually. You can find a few old issues at Unity Books.

Submissions: No current deadline but submissions welcome. http://hueandcry.org.nz/

UP COUNTRY A wonderful hybrid of a literary-adventure-science online journal.

Features stories and essays about the outdoors and all kinds of outdoorsy, adventurous pursuits. Salient inquired about submission deadlines but received no reply, presumably because everyone at Up Country is tramping. Just go for it. http://upcountry.co.nz/ JAAM “Just Another Art Movement” is a print journal founded in 1995 by a writers’ group at Vic. It publishes poetry, fiction and essays by international and established New Zealand writers, but loves the young and emerging ones. It also features photography and wants “experimental, cutting-edge work”.

Submissions: Next deadline is soon! 31 March for the 2014 issue; the theme is “shorelines”. http://jaam.net.nz/ T H E PA N TO G R A P H P U N C H Not a literary journal, but a fantastic and important online space for long-form written work about New Zealand arts and culture.

Submissions: Always looking for ideas about pieces relating to arts and culture. http://pantograph-punch.com SALIENT Yeah, we’re not a literary journal, but we are always looking for creativewriting pieces to publish. Poems, short stories, memoirs, travel writing, villanelles, love sonnets, intricate stream-of-consciousness prose poems … we want to read that shit. Email what you’ve got to editors@salient.org.nz.

B O O K S W E T H I N K YOU S HOU L D R E A D , # 2 The Picture of Dorian Gray] by Oscar Wilde

By Abi Smoker Oscar Wilde’s only novel tells the story of Dorian Gray who, at the behest of his enigmatic friend Lord Henry, indulges in an extravagant lifestyle of booze, drugs and sex. Lord Henry determines to have Dorian’s portrait taken so his Michael Fassbender–esque looks are immortalised.

Obsessed with his own face, Dorian wants to be youthful forever. He has it made – he can do whatever he wants and never bear the ill effects of his antics – a gift that would be particularly handy after those tragic Saturday nights out, would it not? But aside from the superficial excesses of Mr Gray, The Picture of Dorian Gray is a relevant text that combines wit and warmth with the melancholy undertones of a life lived for the wrong reasons. The preface alone is reason enough to read it: “Those who go beneath the surface do so at their peril.”

editor@salient.org.nz

45

MUSIC

and marks from boys’ teeth.” “We make love and fall so/ And it doesn’t feel good/ It’s not magic, it’s work/ But it’s real and that’s cool.”

Album Review by Henry Cooke Not that Perfect Pussy are a one-person band.

This is a band of texture, of layers of ince when did we give up? Since guitar and feedback and drums constantly when did we say yes to love?” reasserting themselves within the mix.

Usually, hearing the album-title as a Often a particularly good riff is just as loud, lyric is a moment for wincing. But when or louder, than Graves herself. the competitively interwoven Perfect Pussy will both destroy and rebuild you.

This is the They are loud enough to lose front of noise that is Perfect record of 2014. yourself within, loud enough to Pussy pauses for a second, and become a wall of emotion you the vocalist screeches those words, we’re all with her, if only for a When you can make the lyrics out of can use as a mirror instead of a soundtrack. the sludge and noise – as you suddenly, This is what it sounds like to get over second. clearly can at several points throughout the something, to realise that you are better Fresh off their breakout demo-tape I have lost all desire for feeling, noise- record – they entirely live up to the band than the sum of your experiences, that you punk band Perfect Pussy have created a name. Visceral, real, and like nothing else. still have a fuckload to offer the world, and 23-minute masterpiece of feedback, loud Let me list some: “What am I doing with more importantly, yourself. Perfect Pussy guitars, and battle-won confidence. This somebody’s son?” “You can read the story will both destroy and rebuild you. This is is an angry record, no doubt, but not sad- of my last six weeks/ In little black bruises the record of 2014.

Perfect Pussy – Say Yes To Love

“S

Metronomy – Love Letters Album Review by Elise Munden

O

ne of the more inexplicable beauties of music is its ability to teleport us to a particular moment, a memory, an emotion.

You should not listen to Love Letters if you have recently broken up with someone, are thinking of breaking up with someone, or just generally hate people. It will only intensify your pain.

Literally every song on this record develops on the themes of heartbreak and rejection. But it’s not just the lyrics – “never wanted, never needed, you said honey, best be leaving” – the melodies are narrow in

46

the nature issue

angry. Happy-angry.

Vocalist Meredith Graves was defiantly into herself on their last record too (“I AM FULL OF LIGHT/ I AM FULL OF LIGHT”), and just steps it up on their full-length (“AND I WANT TO FUCK MYSELF/ AND I WANT TO EAT MYSELF”). She calls her songs “happy revelations about incendiary events”.

range and minimalistic, complimenting frontman Joseph Mount’s I’d-rather-bein-bed style of sadness. As you might have guessed, the harmonies are almost entirely in minor keys, but what is less obvious about Metronomy’s efforts towards cohesiveness is the monotony of the album.

Remember the days, weeks, potentially months after a breakup, where the feelings of loneliness felt like they were never going to end? It was hard to allow yourself to feel any blip of excitement or genuine happiness, right? That is what Love Letters’ overall structure expresses. There are no rises in tempo, no variations on the steady 4/4 beats, no new melodies, nothing surprising.

However, while repetition may be idiosyncratic to Metronomy’s sound, the

lack of variety across this record is musically inexcusable; the second half of the album is almost a carbon copy of the first. The unwillingness of the band to ‘mix up’ their music across the course of the album leaves a palpable impression of hopelessness, maybe even of laziness. :’( It really is a shame that there are minor ‘faults’ in this otherwise brilliant concept album. The instrumentation – particularly the use of brass, keys (electric harpsichord!!!) and guitar – were all welcome additions to the mainly electronic act. The guitar solo in ‘The Upsetter’ is a moving highlight, and ‘Boy Racers’ sounds like the theme song from Revenge of the Nerds. Give it a listen, but be careful.

MUSIC

Johnny Foreigner – You Can Do Better Album Review by Henry Cooke

M

aybe I’m too old for Johnny Foreigner; maybe they are too. On my third re-listen, a few hooks are starting to stand out, a few lines are bouncing around my head, a few melodies are surprising me – but it’s not quite there. As they have on everything I’ve heard of them since their excellent debut, Waited Up ‘til It Was Light, Johnny Foreigner kind of sound like their own tribute band.

But I’m probably being unfair. It’s been years since I worshipped the stop/start, guy/girl, toopunk-to-be-twee but too-earnest-to-be-punk indie pop that Johnny Foreigner excel at. I love their first album too much for anything else they make to seem worthy. Some of these songs have fucking stupid names (‘Le Sigh’ – really?) but they are all pretty good, and full of exactly what I expect

from Johnny Foreigner – intensity, honesty, and an uncomfortable level of intimacy.

Opener ‘Shipping’ is particularly fun, full of energetic chords and a chorus that’s stuck in my head – “I’ll stop shipping you/ when you stop shipping me.” There are other highlights here too – ‘Wifi Beach’, ‘To the Death’ – but not as many as one would hope.

Johnny Foreigner added another guitarist to their three-piece lineup before this album, and that may be my problem. There just feels like there’s more of it now, like they have to justify his presence by cramming in as many riffs as possible, at the expense of some of the other things that made Johnny Foreigner great. The guitar feels a bit further away from the vocal melodies, possibly because they aren’t coming from the same person any more.

Then, I’m probably just too old. Maybe I just need to listen to this album a few hundred times, to scream the lyrics to myself as I walk home in the dark, to imagine myself as every member of the band separately. Maybe then I’ll love Johnny Foreigner like I used to.

A Drake song for Every Environment The Party

– ‘Up All Night’ feat. Nicki Minaj

The Car

– ‘Headlines’

The Evening Stroll – ‘Worst Behaviour’

The Bedroom (crying) – ‘Marvin’s Room’

The Bedroom (fucking) – ‘Practice’

Five ambient albums that simulate a deep connection with the earth: Elve – Emerald

It Hurts – 33 Tears

7” Review by Dr Scrotum Warmonger

I

t Hurts remind me of the mythical Squonk, a grotesque animal said to live in the Hemlock forests of Pennsylvania.

The Squonk’s skin is so ill-fitting, and its hide so overwhelmed by warts and unsightly growths, that it spends much of its life weeping out of sight. When cornered by hunters, the Squonk dissolves into a pool of bubbles and tears. Do you see where I’m going with this?

Where their last release, The Thing That Stings (released on cassette through Australian label Albert’s Basement), dug its nails deep into your flesh in a cyclic whorl of

relentless playground taunting (“I hurt, you hurt, we hurt, they hurt”) 33 Tears really tries to make amends, but in doing so sucks you further inside its queasy, dead-end void.

This is, of course, a good review. It Hurts are a great band. It Hurts might be my favourite band in New Zealand. Angeline (Jane Austen, Currer Bells), Claire (Stefan Neville’s Pumice) and Beth (Futurians) deliver a perfect mess of minimal stop/start bass and drums, errant blooping and emphatic yelps. The songs here try to wrench themselves out of the dropdead desolation of the noisy New Zealand underground, and are constantly pulled back in. Part punk-rock buzz, part signal failure – there’s something horrid about It Hurts they can’t quite shake, and I hope they never will.

Boards of Canada – Geogaddi

Brian Eno – Apollo Balan Acab – Wander / Wonder Skymning – Still There

editor@salient.org.nz

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MUSIC

IN REVIEW O n c e W e B u i lt

a

T ow e r

by Rose Cann

O

nce We Built a Tower is the latest in a run of brilliant Bacchanals productions lighting up the Wellington scene. The element which shone throughout this and several other recent productions by the same company – The Clouds, Gunplay, All’s Well that Ends Well – is the witty and engaging spirit of the cast. The script itself, written for this production by Dean Parker, is a wordy and repetitive one; however, moments of real joy were found in the set design and manipulation, and the joyful play between the ensemble actors.

appears to be a common theme in Bacchanals productions, making them an absolute joy to watch.

Our protagonists – Kirsty Bruce as Ethel McMillan, Alex Greig as Dr Gervan McMillan, Brianne Kerr as Frances Nordmeyer, Michael Trigg as Arnold Nordmeyer, and Michael Ness as Michael Joseph Savage – served us well with consistent, energetic and often comedic acting, which helped the pacing of this wordy piece. The supporting roles, from Alice May Connolly, Joe Dekkers-Reihana, Hilary Penwarden, This is not your last chance to Charlotte Pleasants, Jean Sergent and view this production, however, as there are murmurs of an Aidan Weekes, were fantastic as always, upcoming tour of the show, with charming play, quick wit, clear which I would recommend to any delivery, and a great sense of enthusiasm politically minded theatre-goer as a tight, charismatic piece by a in their performances. It is not often that well-respected company. Overall, in a production where you watch four this show was interesting and separate actors poo on stage, the air is still compelling, primarily due to the skill of the players, and the endearing, especially given that we watch endearingly small-time beginnings another cast member shovel their wares of the protagonists. away immediately afterwards.

The narrative follows “the building of the Waitaki hydro-electric dam near Kurow in the late-1920s and how its revolutionary medical scheme helped the 1935 Labour government create the Welfare State we take for granted today” (thebacchanals. net). Although this made for a challenging and relevant piece of theatre (it is, after all, election year), this political theme did weigh heavy in the atmosphere of the theatre, and was driven home a little too hard during our second act. What began as heartening political common-sense campaigning by likable, charming characters, slowly became scene after scene of frustrating political warfare which, although realistic, was, for one audience member, “a bit too shouty”. Although the themes and messages were of value, towards the end of this two-hour production, the atmosphere descended into chastisement over provocation, a fault which I think lies primarily in the script, but still let down this brilliant production.

The set, consisting almost entirely of old suitcases, was clever, versatile, and made for beautiful scene transitions and play between actors as they threw them back and forth, built their homes and a dam from them. This basic set was brought to life by the beautiful voices and instrumental music of the players throughout, which

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the nature issue

This is not your last chance to view this production, however, as there are murmurs of an upcoming tour of the show, which I would recommend to any politically minded theatre-goer as a tight, charismatic piece by a well-respected company. Overall, this show was interesting and compelling, primarily due to the skill of the players, and the endearingly small-time beginnings of the protagonists. Pre-show and interval entertainment was jubilant, and special mention must be made of the hilarious performances from Brianne Kerr, Michael Trigg and Jean Sergent in these breaks and throughout the show. Musicians Ellie Stewart, Hilary Penwarden and David Lawrence were wonderful to listen to, and added to the production without distracting from the main action, which is a credit to any ensemble.

VISUAL ART

Topographies

by Simon Gennard

I

n the late 1830s, when plans of Wellington were being drawn overcrowding, massive inflation of land prices, and nonexistent up, the New Zealand Company set aside a belt of green space access to opportunity. Early Wellington, in all its abundance, in its in the hills around the central city for public use. In 1873, 1061 desire both to emulate and to form for itself a new set of rules, as acres of land was officially gifted to the people of Wellington. Since an attempt to flatten hierarchies. The online landscape can’t reflect then, areas have been developed, but a remarkable amount of it the physical because no area of internet real estate is more valuable has remained intact. Go far enough west, or north, and the city than others. e-flux’s .art proposal would shift this balance. just stops.

Consider space, necessarily, as a site of conflict. Consider many Skip ahead 140 years, outside Wellington, outside the Town different elements, all in combat for the foreground. Consider these Belt. Success, in artistic terms, is dependent on who can afford to things and you may be able to imagine how Jake Walker’s paintings get attention; who can afford access to institutions, dealers, critics; operate. His current exhibition at City Gallery’s Hirschfeld Gallery to fund themselves through unpaid (on display until 13 April) features a internships. The internet was supposed series of small canvases, some housed to moderate this imbalance, the great in fired-clay frames, accompanied by Consider space, necessarily, as democratiser of our time. Anyone can several sculptures. The paintings seem a site of conflict. Consider many register a domain; anyone can, in theory, wrought, almost at odds with their own different elements, all in combat for the foreground. Consider acquire an audience. medium. Black paint is layered on thick these things and you may be able At the end of this year, the Internet and heavy, revealing the possibility of an to imagine how Jake Walker’s Corporation for Assigned Names and image underneath, unearthing the process paintings operate.

Numbers will release a number of suffixes, by which the work is made; structures or gTLDs (generic top-level domains), upon structures, cannibalising each other. such as .pizza, .sex, and .art. They plan to There’s evidence of Walker’s relationship license individual gTLDs to private companies. with the architecture of Ian Athfield (Walker spent long periods of e-flux is an artist-run organisation that publishes a curated time at the Athfields’ Kilbirnie house as a child), in the protruding newsletter of event listings to around 50,000 subscribers. In their geometric shapes, speckled creams and pale blues, the way material application for control of the .art gTLD, e-flux describes itself as elements are in dialogue with their environment, while refusing “an established authority in the field of art.” Their proposal for to synchronise with it. The paintings are produced horizontally, control of the .art domain would allow them to act as gatekeepers, almost built, with a kind of clumsy calculation, with contour lines, ensuring, so they say, content is “relevant, genuine, and of high peaks and crevasses. They resemble the way the edges of the city are quality.” Their plan for the gTLD involves two stages: the first built up, layered, torn down and half built again, with large open would be to invite a select group of institutions, curators and artists spaces for open views – competing for an atmosphere of paradise to join. Once .art has established itself as a valuable asset, e-flux close to civilisation. will then have discretion over who is allowed in – thus inflating the It’s unclear yet whether e-flux will be granted the rights to value by artificially reducing supply. .art. It may well go to a company completely uninterested in If this seems unwieldy, that’s because it is. Allow me to claw artistic hierarchies. As for Wellington’s Town Belt, it may remain, myself back. The similarity between the Town Belt and .art lies or Wellington may expand. To speak in defence of it this late, in the ostensible generosity of both proposals. It seems noble however, is to risk defending by association e-flux’s proposal (since now, if one ignores the fact that the New Zealand Company was I have relied so heavily on the very tenuous comparison), but giving away land that didn’t belong to them, to invest so much there’s comfort found in the understanding that the city is finite. in the preservation of an idyll so close to a metropolitan centre. Auckland sprawls. London goes on for days. Walker’s work acts The problem is altruism on this scale doesn’t really exist. Space as a meditation on this ceasing: for all the density in his painted itself was one of the most potent selling tactics used to encourage landscapes, the ceramics, in their gracelessness, bring the paintings early settlers. Consider England the physical art world, with its home, situating them in a place more comfortable.

editor@salient.org.nz

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FASHION

SUSTAINA B LE STYLE

by Elise Munden

I

t is easy to choose clothes based on cut, colour, print, and what’s ‘on trend’. But how often do you consider where your clothing comes from and what impact it has on the environment? While clothing lines made from sustainable fabrics are also an excuse to slap huge price tags on new products, it could well be worth the extra $$$ in future decades.

The Go o d S tuf f.

As you probably know, anything with the term ‘organic’ is usually a good thing. But how does this translate to fashion?

Cotton is one of the most popular fabrics used for clothing due to its versatility and the huge amounts which can be produced from one crop. But if you’ve ever read The Grapes of Wrath, you’ll know that this plant is easily damaged by rain and insects. Because of this, fertilisers and pesticides are used in staggering quantities to sustain a good yield, making it the most pesticide-reliant plant product in the world. An organic option will guarantee that your cotton products have not been treated with any chemical products, including bleach and non-plant-based dyes.

Alternatively, bamboo and hemp products are becoming increasingly popular among designers. These plants are durable against both weather and insects, and they grow quickly in warm climates.

Because there is little need to use pesticide or fertiliser on these crops, you can feel reasonably confident that these fabrics have been produced in a sustainable manner, even if they aren’t stamped with the organic label.

The Ba d S tuf f.

As a basic guide, beware of fabrics with the letter Y in them: nylon, polyester, rayon. Nylon and polyester are made from petrochemicals, the use of which is a central cause of global environmental problems.

The production process for these fabrics also uses large amounts of fresh water, and even if you were to purge your wardrobe of these fabrics, they are non-biodegradable!

Rayon is slightly more sustainable as it is manufactured from wood pulp, but until producers can find a way to prepare the fabric without the use of sulfuric acid and caustic soda, its cons far outweigh its pros.

The Be s t S tuf f.

Do a little research into your favourite clothing brands. If you find out that their products are not made from sustainable fabrics, simply buy their clothes second-hand from somewhere like Recycle Boutique or Trade Me, meaning that your precious money is not going directly to the company. In general, though, second-hand shopping should be encouraged at all times.

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the nature issue

OVERSEEN ATVIC D av i d

Second-year Film and Media Studies W h at a r e y o u lo o k i n g f o r wa r d film production course.

to this year?

My

Theatre

WHATS ON Film French Film Festival 19 March – 7 April See frenchfilmfestival.co.nz for screening times Films by Starlight – Spirited Away, Waitangi Park, Wellington, Wed 26 Mar, 9 pm Beyond Reasonable Doubt, The Film Archive, Wellington, Wed 26 Mar, 7 pm

Books Narrative magazine’s Winter 2014 Story

Prize closes 31 March. 1st prize is $2500. http://www.narrativemagazine.com/ node/238622 JAAM literary journal submissions for 2014 issue close 31 March. http://jaam.net.nz/

This Rugged Beauty at BATS. Concession $14. Tue 25 Mar to Sat 5 Apr, 7 pm Raw Meat Comedy, The Fringe Bar, Wellington, Mon 24 Mar, 8 pm Pasefika, Circa Theatre, Wellington, Tue 25 Mar, 6.30 pm Gloria’s Handbag, Circa Theatre, Wellington, Tue 25 Mar, 7.30 pm Wake Up Tomorrow, Te Whaea: NZ National Dance and Drama Centre, Wellington, Wed 26 Mar, 7.30 pm The Improv Lounge: Autumn Season, The Fringe Bar, Wellington, Wed 26 Mar, 8 pm The Medicine – Stand Up Comedy, The Cavern Club, Wellington, Wed 26 Mar, 8 pm 2014 Raw Comedy Quest, San Francisco Bath House, Wellington, Thu 27 Mar, 8 pm

Visual Arts See Me Contemporary sculpture in support of Art in Schools The Young (2/7 Hawker St) Until 5 April The Artist Studio Revisited Roger Blackley and Jim Barr discuss the artist’s studio as a “mythic site of creation” City Gallery 1 April, 6 pm (Free entry)

Jeff Thomson: Squash/Mold/Heavy Metal/ Press Bowen Galleries Until 5 April [BOLD: Fashion] The Evolution of Black Masculinity Through Fashion – VICE online.

L’Wren Scott, American fashion designer, died last week in New York :’(

Music Fighting the Shakes The Mighty Mighty Free Wednesday 9.30 pm A$AP Ferg (!)

Bodega $95 (Last 50 tickets! This will probably have sold out when you read this.)

Friday 7 pm Kylesa Bodega $40 Saturday 8 pmSaturday 8 pm

V B C 8 8.3 G U I D E BREAKFAST 8 .10 A M

MONDAY

10 A M NOON NOON 2.00PM 2.00 4.00PM

DEAD MAN MONDAY

WITH CASEY & JOSS

TBC

WITH ELEANOR & SIMON

STREET KNOWLEDGE

WITH SAM & HUGH

TUNES WITH TAMBLY INFIDEL CASTRO

WITH PHILIP MCSWEENEY

2 4 1

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

WITH DUNCAN & CAM

DEAD BOYSʼ PIRATE RADIO WITH WILL

DEAD AIR

RAW POLITIK

SUNDAY

WAKE N BAKE

WITH OLLIE & ASHER

WITH PEARCE

DOMO ARIGATO

WITH MR ROBATO

SASAENG SATURDAYS

WITH SAVANNAH

THE SALIENT SHOW

WITH GEORGE ARMSTRONG

TWO HOURS WITH TIMTAM

[T B D]

WITH HUGO

7. 0 0 9.00PM 9.00 11 . 0 0 P M

THURSDAY

MUSIC, NEWS, INTERVIEWS, GIVEAWAYS

ROBANDTAMMY

11 P M 1. 0 0 A M

WEDNESDAY

THE VBC BREAKFAST SHOW JIVING JAMES & GROOVING GREG

DRIVE 4 - 7PM

TUESDAY

WITH CIARAN & SOPHIE

THURSDAY DRIVE WITH A.D.D

BAD SCIENCE

SIGNAL SOUNDS

SUPERFLUOUS SUPERHEROS

WITH TIM & ALEX

WITH HOLLY, S TUMBLE, GOOSEHEAD & VIC SERATONIN

WITH MATT & FRIENDS

WITH LOU

THE B-SIDE REVOLUTION

WITH RICHARD

PRE-LOAD

THE NIGHT SHIFT WITH CHRIS

editor@salient.org.nz

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PUZZLES

Target

H

N

E

A

E

C

D

G

X

2

3

1

4

6

Cryptic Crossword

5

7

Across 6. Do work to enable others to play? (7) 7. Either way, it’s a form of address (5) 9. Study I am making of material (5) 10. Performer ties rat up (7) 12. Occasion to be faced with resolution? (3, 5, 3) 14. Family tree researcher got lineages worked out (11) 18. Now for the gift (7) 19. Salt like dopes, perhaps (5) 21. Exposed as a bread-maker (5) 22. Common soldier? (7)

8 9

10 11 12 13

14

15

16 17

18

19 20

21

22

3

4

8 6

2 8

6 1 4 5 6

6

8 9

1 9

5

3

2 7 3 4

8 9 5

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the nature issue

2

4

9

5

4 5

7

1 5

8 4

9

1

6

2 7

9 7 4 3

7 8 6

1 5

3 1

4 6 9

6

9 5

1 2

4

2

4 2

4 6

8

6

5 8

9

8

1

3

Down 1. Not interested or in bed (5) 2. Elf using malice about right (6) 3. A quiet wood (3) 4. Sign after five changes (6) 5. Not just relating to some? (7) 8. Organise the gunners back at the shooting area (7) 11. Depression can be upsetting on cycle (7) 13. Rumour of some corn in the hay (7) 15. English flower festival in spring (6) 16. Rushed into a ship with supplies (6) 17. Royal knocking back lager (5) 20. Cut out of the will (3)

2

7

3

COMICS

editor@salient.org.nz

53

2014/15 Internships and Graduate Jobs!

Applications closing soon: 24 Mar: Duncan Cotterill Lawyers, EY 25 Mar: Audit New Zealand 26 Mar: Grant Thornton, PricewaterhouseCoopers 27 Mar: Atlassian 28 Mar: Bank of New Zealand, Woodside Energy, Wilson Harle 30 Mar: Motu Economic and Public Policy Research Trust, Fonterra, Deloitte 31 Mar: Unilever Australia & New Zealand 1 Apr: Microsoft Corp 3 Apr: UBS, Citi, Macquarie Group 10 Apr: Reserve Bank of New Zealand 11 Apr: Luke Cunningham Clere Details on CareerHub: [ITALICS: www. victoria.ac.nz/careerhub] Start preparing your CV – attend workshops, get your CV checked…

Upcoming Free Careers Events for all students

Employer presentations: 25 Mar: CAANZ 27 Mar: Reserve Bank 3 Apr: Atlassian (IT) 5 May: ANZ Careers in Focus Seminars: 25 Mar: Law – Working in SME-sized Law Firms 7 Apr: Law – Working in the Public Sector 14 Apr: Law – Working in the Corporate World 20 May: Law – Overseas Postgraduate in Law Check details/book on CareerHub: www. victoria.ac.nz/careerhub

VicIDS

Are you passionate about exploring creative solutions to the challenges of poverty, environmental degradation and humanrights violations? Are you interested in the field of development, aid and sustainability?

Then VicIDS is the club for you! We are a group of students and members of the wider community who meet fortnightly to attend thought-provoking speaker events and discuss development issues. We partner with a range of organisations and initiate awareness-raising events on campus. We promise interesting discussions and useful contacts! Come along to our meeting TODAY (Monday 24 March) or Monday 7 April at 5.15 pm in Cotton 304, Kelburn Campus to find out more. Email us at vic.ids. info@gmail.com and find us on Facebook.

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the nature issue

NOTICES If you want to send something to the Salient Notices Page, please do.

Notices must be 100 words or less.

They must in by Wednesday at 5 pm. Send them to us at editor@salient.org.nz

Deep Sea Oil Drilling?

HumanFM presents: a Do Something event: Deep Sea Oil – Is It Worth It? Come along for a discussion panel on the environmental and economic impacts of deep sea oil exploration in New Zealand.

Panellists include Professor of Public Policy Jonathan Boston, Goldman Environmental Prize Recipient Cath Wallace and VicePresident of New Zealand Oil and Gas Mac Beggs.

From 6.30 pm Wednesday 26 March at Ramsey House, 8 Kelburn Parade.

Listen, learn, engage.

Do People Even Read The Notices?

Like and share Salient’s Facebook status about free coffee and go into the draw to win one free cup a day from Milk Crate café for the rest of the year!

Salient also has vouchers for The Hunter Lounge to give away. First 10 people to email editor@salient.org.nz win $4 off their next pizza!

Goju Ryu Karate

Thursdays 6–7.30 pm Rec Centre Long Room Sundays 4–5.30 pm Rec Centre Dance Room VUW student 2-for-1 deal: join up with a friend before April 24 2014 and only pay membership and training fee for one student (both must be current students at Victoria University).

VIC OE OVERSEAS EXCHANGE FAIR THIS THURSDAY!

Vic OE’s annual Overseas Exchange Fair will be held this Thursday 27 March, Maclaurin Foyer, 11 am – 3 pm.

Come along and find out where you could study as part of your degree! Win prizes, food and more!

As well as dozens of university booths, there

will be information sessions (up the stairs next to Maki Mono): 11–11.20 am Embassy of Germany 11.30–11.50 am Embassy of France 12–12.20 pm Sciences Po, France 12.30–12.50 pm UDEM, Mexico 1–1.20 pm Università Bocconi, Italy 1.30–1.50 pm University of the Ryukyus, Japan 2–2.20 pm Embassy of Netherlands 2.30–2.50 pm British High Commission Why not study overseas as part of your degree?!

Study in English, earn Vic credit, get StudyLink and grants, explore the world!

Weekly seminars on Wednesdays, Level 2, Easterfield Building, 12.50 pm.

Website: http://victoria.ac.nz/exchange

FILM SOCIETY

Do want to save money on your mortgage?

Because here at Film Society, we certainly do.

And that’s why we show films every Thursday from 6 pm in the Memorial Theatre (SU Building), for free! This week, we have a double feature of Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song and Black Dynamite, which is more comedy than you can shake a stick at.

Those who dare can become VIP members for only $10, and be in to win all kinds of prizes. For more info find us here: https:// www.facebook.com/groups/vicunifilmsociety/.

Wellington Rape Crisis: Annual Street Appeal

Friday 4 April, 7.30 am – 6 pm. Calling for volunteer collectors – Contact Tabby on 027 331 4507 or annualappeal@ wellingtonrapecrisis.org.nz – please donate generously.

Fabric-a-brac

11 am to 3 pm, Saturday 12 April 2014 St Anne’s Church hall, Emmett St, Newtown.

30 stallholders with everything from sewing accessories and patterns to upholstery, vintage, children’s, haute couture and modern fabric.

contributors editors:

D uncan M c L achlan & C a m e r on P r i c e designer: Imogen Temm n e w s e d i t o r : S o p h i e B oo t c r e a t i v e e d i t o r : C hlo e D av i e s ch i e f s u b - e d i t o r : N i c k F a r g h e r distributor: Joe Morris f e a t u r e w r i t e r : P h i l i p M c S w e e n e y ( ch i e f ) , P e nn y G aul t , A l e x H oll i s n e w s i n t e r n s : S i m on D e nn i s , S t e p h T r e n g r ov e

arts editors: N i na P o w l e s ( B oo k s ) , C ha r lo t t e D o y l e ( F i l m ) , H e n r y C oo k e ( M u s i c ) , R o s e C ann ( T h e a t r e ) , S i m on G e nna r d ( V i s ual A r t s ) , E l i s e M un d e n ( F a s h i on ) g e n e r al con t r i b u t o r s : D av i d A l s o p , N i cola B r a i d , S on y a C la r k , N i c k C r o s s , A n d y D al e , M a d e l e i n e F o r e m an , S a s ha F r anc i s , J ul i a G a b e l , S t e p h G r e g o r , R u p e r t H un t e r , E m m a H u r l e y , M oll y M c C a r t h y , J o r d an M c C lu s k e y , H u g o M c K i nnon , A n d r e w M ahon e y , E l e ano r M e r t on , G u s M i t ch e ll , P ho e b e M o r r i s , S a m N o r t hco t t , C a t h e r i n e N e l s on , J a m e s N ou g h t , S a m P a t ch e t t ( s p o r t s w r i t e r ) , A l i c e P e acoc k , S a m P r i m e , O ll i e R i t ch i e , S o f i a R o b e r t s , A b i S m o k e r , O l i v e r S y m e , L e o T ho m a s , W i l b u r T o w n s e n d , J ul i a W e ll s

contributor of the week J ul i a G a b e l

F un d e d

by

Victoria

A d v e r t i s i n g M ana g e r T i m W i l s on s al e s @ vu w s a . o r g . nz 04 463 6982 U n i v e r s i t y o f W e ll i n g t on

s t u d e n t s , t h r ou g h t h e

student services levy

editor@salient.org.nz

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