UNAFFORDABLE. UNATTAINABLE. UNINSULATED. UNDESIRABLE. UNBEATABLE.
Salient Magazine
01.03.21
The Shitbox Society
Destination Wellington
Student Guide to Parking
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p18 - 19
p23 - 24
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Editorial
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Letters & Notices News
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The Shitbox Society
Feature Feature
Destination Wellington Centrefold / Feature Artist Feature
Guide to Parking Columns
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Shits Fucked Shits Good (25),To Be Frank (26), $10 Jugs (27) Flat Chat (28), PSC (29), VUWSA (29), UniQ (30), Mauri Ora (30)
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Culture Fringe (32), Doons ep and Gig (33)
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Poetry Entertainment
About Us Salient is published by, but remains editorially independent from, the Victoria University of Wellington Students’ Association (VUWSA). Salient is funded in part by VUWSA through the Student Services Levy. Salient is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA).
Complaints Complaints regarding the material published in Salient should first be brought to the Editors in writing (editor@salient.org.nz). If not satisfied with the response, complaints should be directed to the Media Council (info@mediacouncil.org.nz).
The views expressed in Salient do not necessarily reflect those of the Editor, VUWSA, or the University.
Sink your teeth into it!
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Editorial UNBEATABLE ON ANY GIVEN DAY So you’ve made your way to Pōneke and onto the campuses of VUW. Wellington has not had the best coverage in the news lately. A litmus test of recent headlines reveals a pH level of 1, the acidic red zone. There’s the Council in disarray, the ticking time bomb of poo pipes, and the housing crisis. We’re covering some of these things because they matter. In ‘The Shitbox Society’ on page 14, Johnny continues investigations into the state of the rental market. Vape Naiche rants about the selling off of the library on page 25. It’s the negative news that floats to the top. *Bad* news is necessary to spread awareness and create change. Headlines that get people rarked are good for clicks. It’s also just straight-up harder to write about joy. Wellington is still unbeatable on any given day. We’re part of an 18,217 strong student body, mincing around in a city alongside artists, politicians, like-minded learners, and famous cats. Lola, the black and white Aro Valley feline, has three legs and deserves every ounce of fame. We also have the only free ambulance in the country, which has saved too many students from the gutters of Courtenay Place. The news about the University has also been failing the litmus test, with staff cuts and wasteful spending floating around. It sucks. But there’s joy, too.
Professors put hours into researching and delivering their knowledge, and this year, are doing so under a changed academic landscape. It’s a privilege to have them. In this issue, Kane Bassett profiles the work of Dr Carwyn Jones (Ngāti Kahungnunu). You can read all about his work on page 06. Dr Jones is taking the infamous LAWS 121 paper, which is the second most popular course this year. The course has been restructured to put Indigenous law before the introduction of the English legal system. When Sally started her LLB a *few* years ago, there was little representation of the Māori legal system in the introductory course. It brings hope to see change in the way our legal system is taught, and a step to centre Te Ao Māori. There’s also work beginning on The Living Pā, which is set to be built on Kelburn parade. Hon. Justice Sir Joe Williams (Ngāti Pūkenga, Waitaha and Tapuika), is an ambassador for the project and is quoted on the VUW website. He says, “it will be a game changer not just for Māori and the University but for the very idea of higher education.” These are things to feel proud of in the place we find ourselves. You’re in Pōneke with the opportunity to learn from experts who care. When not studying or pretending to study, there’s plenty else to be in awe of. Lachlan Ewing has put together a ‘travel guide’ for Wellington on page 18. We’ve also got our weekly column, ‘$10 Jugs’, helping you to find better ways to spend your limited beer allowance on page 27.
At VUW, you have the privilege of learning from teachers who are dedicated to, and passionate about their fields. Many have roles outside of academia, working on government bills (Dr Geoff McClay on the Trusts Act 2019), advocating for reform (Dr Fiona Hutton is a very active campaigner for drug law reform), and seeking better outcomes for staff and students (Dr Dougal McNiell, President of the VUW Tertiary Kia ora, Education Union). You will hear your lecturers talking on the radio, see their words published in the media, and on bookshelves. Sally Ward (she/her) and Matthew Casey (he/him) Salient Co-Editors Brought to you by Peoples Coffee www.salient.org.nz
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NOTICES & LETTERS VUW Womens Collective Present: Women’s Week The Women’s Collective is hosting its annual Women’s Week from Monday March 8thSunday 14th March. Women’s Week is all about empowering women and raising awareness on some important issues, that is jam packed with some awesome events. And pizza and lots of spot prizes, don’t forget about those.
To find out more about Women’s Week, the awesome events we’re having and how to get involved check us out on Facebook @VUWWC or on the Gram @vuwwomenscollective or feel free to email us at vuwwomenscollective@ gmail.com
Sell Outs Dear Salient, I have noticed that your magazine had four whole pages of welcomes. Would’ve been cool if you hadn’t sold out and had the PM and the VC there. Very lame. Disgruntled reader
Submit Letters and Notices for future issues by Tuesdays 5pm to editor@salient.org.nz
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Letters and Notices
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News
TEU Against Austerity / Clubs Expo Dr. Carwyn Jones / Reply All / KimYe
TERTIARY EDUCATION UNION, VUW TUTORS’ NETWORK FIRMLY AGAINST AUSTERITY UNIONS PUTTING IN THE HARD MAHI
Niva Chittock, Chief Reporter (she/her)
of School or Manager if they are concerned…[there is a] dedicated staff wellness manager who manages the provision of staff wellness and health services, staff rehabilitation, advice and related support.” Last year, VUW’s TEU branch saw a surge in membership, jumping from 890 in January to 1079 by the end of the year, showing keen support for unions.
Austerity measures continue to loom over Victoria University, and staff and tutors believe there is no better time to join unions.
VUW’s TEU branch also banded together with students last year in protest of the University’s proposed Whiria Project. VUW’s TEU branch and VUWSA opposed the project due to a lack of student and staff consultation, and concerns that the project would be a cost cutting exercise. The University has since axed the project.
Unions exist for workers to support each other. They allow the strength of a collective to tackle problems people face at work.
The TEU reported there were “record numbers of TEU members attending” the collective discussions of staff and students.
Supporting VUW staff is the VUW Tertiary Education Union (TEU) Branch. Their current work against austerity McNeill further highlighted the current struggles for staff, measures is best highlighted in a new campaign unveiled in noting: “What [the threat of austerity is] doing to staff collaboration with VUWSA on Tuesday, 23 February: “Staff workloads, though, and to staff stress really concerns me.” cuts hurt students - let’s fight for every job.” “Our role is to advocate for staff inside the University [...] VUW TEU’s President, Dougal McNeill, says: “if there’s We really hope that [the Whiria project] was shelved pretty money for new buildings, if there’s money for new signage, permanently and it would be concerning to us if there were then there shouldn’t be austerity around central teaching elements of that plan being introduced elsewhere. We plan and learning.” on being one of the main forces making sure those cuts don’t go through this year.” The University said it is continuing to experience a large loss of revenue due to the decline of international students. “The TEU is going to make sure that staff will be at the “The financial impact of this sudden loss [...] is severe and heart of discussion[s]. I think we have to remember that will persist for at least three to four years,” a spokesperson the University as defined in law, is made up of students, said. staff and graduates. The University is not the current management of any given institution...” “it is clear that, with the extended regulatory settings remaining in place, further difficult decisions will need to The TEU wants VUW’s austerity measures to stop be made this year.” impacting teaching and learning. It defeats the point of “...a public institution, [whose] purpose is to serve the Salient was told, “The University is a health-promoting community through teaching and research”, says McNeill. university. Staff should work with their relevant Head
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Supporting tutors, who are often in the unique position of being staff and students, is the VUW Tutors’ Network. The network grew last year and shares a similar sentiment to the TEU: “to build strength, political power and union power to make some changes to tutoring.” Formed in 2019, the collective has established a network across more than half of the schools and faculties across the University, and plans to expand to every faculty in the University. Many tutors are members of the TEU as well, though core members note how “we realised that the [current
Photo: VUW TEU’s President, Dougal McNeill
representative] system just wasn’t built for us. [The TEU] is great, we just felt there was a need for a tutor specific voice alongside that.” Providing a space for solidarity is something that core members of the network believe is needed.
CLUB EXPOS TICKING ALL THE BOXES AT VUW TLDR; CLUBS ARE GOOD Matthew Casey, (he/him) Students at Victoria University flooded into Kelburn and Pipitea campuses last week to attend Club Days; events the VUWSA Clubs and Activities Officer says went swimmingly. Clubs day is an opportunity for students to build relationships with new people. Of the 150+ clubs on offer, there’s a lot of variety. From Athletics through to the Sign Language club, there is usually a place for everyone to be involved in the university community. Zoë Simpson, VUWSA’s Clubs and Activities officer, told Salient she believes clubs week has been a success. She added, “Clubs week is really about promoting clubs to ensure that students know about them.” She says a benefit of clubs week is that students get to see clubs they didn’t know existed. National list MP, Nicola Willis can vouch for the importance of clubs on campus, as she met her husband while debating at Vic. Jadene Huff, a student and clubs assistant at Clubs and Societies Victoria, says the week has been brilliant. We spoke to her before the Clubs Day held at Pipitea last Thursday, which has been going since Trimester 2, 2019. She said they are trying to build a strong club presence at Pipitea campus, like that at Kelburn. Huff believes that over the past few years the clubs society has become a lot more “forward facing”, adding it’s been really nice to see clubs grow.
Photo: The Prime Minister visited campus on Tuesday and was swarmed by students in front of the VicLabour stand. If you couldn’t make it to any of the Clubs Expos, there is a directory on the University’s website under ‘Clubs and Societies’ with details about every club, including their contact details. If you don’t see yourself in any of these clubs, don’t worry, because you can just register your own, provided you have a members list of at least 15 VUW students.
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SALIENT 121: AN INTRODUCTION TO DR. CARWYN JONES Kane Bassett, Ngāti Apa, Ngāti Kahungunu ki te Wairoa, (he/him) Dr. Carwyn Jones (Ngāti Kahungunu ki te Wairoa) sits comfortably in his Vic Uni office, with a smile plastered ear to ear. He’s talking about his mahi, in and outside of the university, and says it might just work to push through transformational change in Law Schools across the country one day. Jones is an associate professor at Victoria University. He holds a Bachelor of Arts and a Bachelor of Laws. He has completed a Masters of Arts in Interdisciplinary Studies (Law, Environmental Studies, Indigenous Peoples Studies), as well as a PhD focussing on the Treaty of Waitangi settlement process. He is the Tumuaki Tanē of Te Hunga Rōia Māori o Aotearoa (the Māori Law Society) and is credited as an author on over 100 publications to boot. He’s inspired by the likes of Joe Williams (Ngāti Pūkenga, Te Arawa), Moana Jackson (Ngāti Kahungunu, Ngāti Porou), and Ani Mekaere (Ngāti Raukawa, Ngāti Porou). He is talking to Salient in between lecture slots for the infamous first year law paper, LAWS 121: Intro to New Zealand Legal System—a course he is coordinating this year for the first time. “I’m really nervous,” says Jones about teaching the course, through a shy chuckle.
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Profile : Dr.toCarwyn Welcome 2021 Jones
He’s nervous because it is a ”big class.” With a cohort of around 750 students, LAWS 121 is also the first course law students take as they aim to progress into second year law. But Jones is less nervous than he is excited, especially for the opportunity to think about how he and the faculty might engage with tikanga Māori in the course. Through a combination of his own thinking and recommendations made by the law faculty, Jones has altered the structure of LAWS 121 to teach Indigenous Law first. Students taking the paper will begin by learning about Pacific Law, before moving onto Māori Law, then onto English legal systems. “We need to ensure that the Māori law origins of the New Zealand legal system are included when we’re thinking about where the NZ legal system comes from,” says Jones, “because the New Zealand legal system is developing in a way which requires lawyers to be prepared to engage with tikanga Māori as law.” He says the most high-profile example of this requirement is the Peter Ellis case heard in June at the Supreme Court.
Ellis was convicted after a trial in the High Court at Christchurch in 1993 of 16 counts of sexual offending. The complainants were children. He was sentenced to seven years imprisonment, and released from his sentence in 2000. Ellis’ conviction has drawn controversy, however, due to failures in the investigation and justice processes used.
“Tino rangatiratanga [or indigenous sovereignty] encompasses a system of law”, he said. He was also quick to note that tikanga Māori functioned as a system of law prior to European contact. Jones says the changes he has made to LAWS 121 will be important for establishing a culture in the course where student learning is initially framed in terms of indigeneity. That said, he recognises that changing the content of papers is not enough. He says more work needs to be done in Law Schools across the country before we start noticing transformational change in this space.
Ellis died in September last year, just months after he lodged an appeal against his conviction. Jones said this would usually mean the appeal would be terminated, “But one of the Supreme Court judges raised the question about whether tikanga Māori had anything to say about that.” He is currently a member of a national team of authors working to develop a framework for how New Zealand Jones says tikanga experts were brought together to might go about indigenising the LLB. The team is led wananga about the relevant tikanga that would apply. They by Jones, Jacinta Ruru (Raukawa, Ngāti Ranginu) from talked about the concept of mana, or reputation, and how the University of Otago, and Khylee Quince (Te Roroa, mana transcends death. They also spoke to the importance Ngāpuhi, Ngāti Porou) from the University of Auckland. It of reaching a state of resolution regardless of whether the involves all Māori legal academics across the country. Also, accused was alive. the team has been able to engage Metiria Turei (Ngāti Kahungunu) as a research fellow on the project. “She’s The appeal was allowed to continue on this basis, a been fantastic,” said Jones. decision Jones believes is changing the way people think about law in Aotearoa. The team has published one report with financial assistance from the Borrin Foundation, titled “Phase One: “[The case] opened the eyes of many people in the legal Strengthening the Ability for Māori Law to Become a Firm profession to see that tikanga can be relevant in all kinds Foundational Component of a Legal Education in Aotearoa of ways,” said Jones, adding tikanga Māori can apply New Zealand.“ They are currently working on their second regardless of whether individuals are Māori or non-Māori. issues paper. He said treating LAWS 121 as though students would one day be expected to draw on tikanga concepts akin to those employed in the Ellis case will be paramount in his teaching. But there are legal professionals who don’t see the value in treating tikanga Māori as a source of law. In fact, Lawyer and former ACT MP, Stephen Franks believes tikanga undermines democracy and the rule of law. Franks stated to Stuff around the time the Ellis Case was heard at the Supreme Court that tikanga licenses judges to decide cases based on how they feel, and not according to law. He added, “Because it is unwritten, tikanga is easily invented to suit and you can’t subject it to the normal rationality constraints.”
Consultation on the project is still ongoing. Jones confirmed the team is consulting with Te Kawa a Māui (Victoria University’s School of Māori Studies), Te Hunga Rōia Māori o Aotearoa, broader Māori legal communities, Māori communities, and will be engaging with mana whenua at each of the country’s law schools. He said the group is largely inspired by what’s happening with Indigenous Law overseas, especially in Canada. He made it clear that other sources of Indigenous Law exist and said they will inform the team’s research. Dr. Carwyn Jones is an absolute asset to this university. I still see him perched in his computer chair, smiling in anticipation for what Aotearoa’s legal system might look like one day. Tautoko, Carwyn—you deserve it.
On the contrary, Jones believes recognising indigenous law as a legal system in and of itself is part of Aotearoa’s responsibility to te Tiriti o Waitangi.
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MASS HYSTERIA AS TWO PEOPLE HIT “REPLY ALL’ TO VIC UNI”S WEEKLY NEWSLETTER
THE ROYAL COUPLE OF CAPITALISM ARE GETTING DIVORCE Sally Ward (she/her)
STUDENTS ALMOST DROPPED THEIR NOODLE CUPS DOWN THEIR $500 OVERSIZED SWEATERS Maddi Rowe (she/her) Unassuming VUW students near and far were subject to a comedy of technological errors on January 21, with two people hitting ‘reply all’ to the University’s fortnightly newsletter ‘Whītiki’. The recipients’ replies appeared to be sent from the university themselves, causing widespread confusion. The email following the newsletter read: “Hi could I please be removed from this list, I’m no longer a student.” A perplexed current student, Eumina Reyes, replied back: “I am unsure about what this email means. I am a returning student so please include me in your mailing list still.” One question loomed over the VUW student populace: What happened? “This was the result of a technical error”, said a spokesperson for the university. “Emails sent to that particular mailing list are usually subject to moderation, but due to a setting being temporarily disabled, [...] students who received the newsletter were able to ‘reply all’”. The University confirmed in a statement to Salient that the techno-faux-pas was considered a minor privacy breach, given that all 12,734 recipients of the newsletter were able to see Reyes’ full name. “I thought that I was going to be excluded from the mailing list, which means that I won’t be receiving all the important University emails”, said Reyes of the breach. “I just hope this doesn’t happen in the future”. The University has since rectified the glitch, and has been in touch with both people involved.
Kim Kardashian via instagram Kim Kardashian filed for divorce from Kanye West on February 19. Their marriage lasted 7 years. The relationship property between the two has been reported by Forbes as $750 million USD. The split appears to be amicable. Kim posted a photo just three weeks ago of herself sitting on a balcony in a pair of Yeezys. Salient interviewed a few students about the news. We started by asking them if they cared. Pakorn “kinda” cares. He’s heard of few of Kanye’s songs but “doesn’t really dabble” in his music. He did have a favourite song, “Faded”. His mate Jarred does not really think it’s interesting. He does Listen to Kanye, and found it tough to pick a favourite, finally landing on “Runaway”. He has watched “some” of Keeping Up With the Kardashians; “actually like seasons 1 - 4”. Over in the Hub Salient spoke to Shannon and Georgia. Shannon doesn’t care, but thinks it’s interesting. She listens to “old Kanye”. Shannon watches KUWTK “religiously” but notes “it’s depressing to see them being so rich and me being a struggling student”. When asked for further comment, Shannon said “Jeffree Star is the reason they’re getting a divorce”. There were rumours that Star, an American YouTuber, was the reason behind the divorce, which he has since quashed. Georgia also doesn’t care, but likes the gossip. She listens to Kanye’s “Stronger” because it’s “the best workout song”. Finally, Uheina spoke to Salient in the library green zone. She does care about the divorce because she’s been watching KUWTK forever and “hope[s] they get back together”.
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Shit News.
Don’t mistake it for the real thing.
$ 2. 50
Poopy water on Kelburn Parade Have fun figuring out which parts of this are true
Students at Kelburn Campus were greeted by a stream of brown poopy water on Kelburn Parade as they walked into campus two weeks ago. Salient was alerted to the poopy water on Friday 19 February by a former staff writer via messenger. Their message said: “Yeah boi wastewater running down Kelburn Parade,” with a photo of the poopy water attached. When asked if they were responsible for the poopy water, the University flat out said: “Not our pipes, not our problem, g”, and suggested hitting up the council. The University also suggested Salient start asking better questions, which made the News Editor cry.
Salient did not contact the council because the stream only flowed brown for about five minutes, and one scroll through Twitter earlier this week revealed the council probably had more pressing issues to focus on at the moment (seriously, check Twitter).
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Shit News.
Don’t mistake it for the real thing.
Guilford, Foster, Robertson priced out of property market; begin flatting together
Liam Powell (he/him)
Who keeps leaving their bloody dishes in the sink?
As Wellington property prices continue to soar, the Vice Chancellor of Victoria University, the Mayor of Wellington and the MP for Wellington Central (also the Minister of Finance) have opted to move into the same rental accommodation to minimise their living expenses. Despite a combined gross annual salary of nearly $875,000, Grant Guilford, Andy Foster and Grant Robertson saw no other choice but to pool their resources so they could afford to live south of the Remutaka Ranges. When interviewed by Salient, Robertson said he was “fairly confident” that their combined income would cover rent and most necessities but acknowledged that fully heating the flat in winter might be outside the trio’s price range.
Foster downplayed both accusations, but was reportedly seen hastily rearranging his giant Lord of the Rings poster as if to hide something on his wall prior to Salient’s arrival at the flat. It’s not the first controversy that has embroiled the flat. Salient understands that Foster was responsible for clogging the house’s only toilet, and then proceeded to sell Robertson’s furniture to pay for the plumber. Foster hotly denied these accusations. He claimed to Salient that “Robbo is in charge of the flat account so he should pay for that stuff.” “In any case, I pawned the bookshelf for a cash loan, so I technically didn’t sell anything. Also, this is nowhere near as dumb as Grant constantly trying to slap a name on the place as if we live in Dunedin or something.”
“On the bright side, if we were to actually warm the place up to 25 degrees, we’d probably use so much energy Guilford was nonchalant about the deflection, and we’d directly jeopardise New Zealand’s commitment to simply claimed he was trying to emulate other, more the Paris Agreement, so that’s fine I suppose”. successful flats.
The flat, located in Aro Valley, was built in 1908, renovated once in the 1950s, gets three hours of sunlight a day in summer and has no insulation. Black mould can be found in the kitchen, bathroom and two of the bedrooms. It is guaranteed to collapse in an earthquake. The state of the house has already prompted controversy from critics of Andy Foster, who doubt that three senior public servants could jointly afford a flat with a mould free room. “Either the Mayor is using undisclosed funds, or he’s lying about there being no mould in his bedroom, which is a little sad either way,” said Councillor Tamatha Paul.
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“With a sick name like “Smash Palace” or “Poon Lagoon,” we can at least pretend that we go to Otago and don’t live in an overpriced, mouldy, earthquake prone shithole for a little while.” Guilford acknowledged that flatting was never his first option, as he had initially applied to be a residential advisor at an undisclosed hall of residence. “I thought my veterinary background of wrangling staggering, stupid animals soaked in their own bodily fluids would set me up quite well as an RA dealing with first year students. Unfortunately, I wasn’t accepted for any of my top three preferences so I messaged Andy and Robbo and the rest, as they say, was history.”
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These flats aren’t suitable for students. Oh wait. They’re not suitable for anyone.
The Shitbox Society Johnny O’Hagan Brebner (he/him)
The Shitbox Experience is an extra-special, two-inone gift that the country has given students: shitty rentals and the expectation that we should enjoy them as a “rite of passage.” Bernard* paid around $200 a week for his first flat; on a ten degree slant, gaps between the floor boards that the dirt underneath could be seen through, and of course plenty of rats. His second smelled of shit and only 2 out of the 5 bedrooms had windows.
from the Property Manager Loveseat, a hiding from the Privatised Uni Pullout, and suffocation from the Beanbag of Unaffordability.
Abby has a great flat now. Her first room was $220 a week, but it was so damp the walls wept at night and her clothes would go mouldy over the weekend.
Sarah was a student in the 90s and early 2000s. “Housing wasn’t such a big deal—it was crappy, but it wasn’t impossible to find a home close to uni and it wasn’t horrifically expensive.” She, and others, think the main difference now is rent. When she was flatting, students generally only paid $70 to $120pw. Income was more stable; student allowances covered most housing costs. She adds, “rents never used to rise annually as a rule.”
Ren has had a better experience, but has spent most of his time in tiny rooms: “Harry Potter’s room under the stairs was better.” He currently has to spend his entire StudyLink living costs on another tiny space with no sunlight. Not only do we get to live in yellow-stickered, damp, $250+ per-week death traps mostly shared with rats and mushrooms, we also get to be sidelined when we complain about it. Surely, ask our older generations: “it’s not that bad? It can’t be that much worse than when we were in uni?” Well, they’d be half right—the quality of student housing has been pretty trash for decades, although almost everything around it has changed. Our parents and grandparents’ generation mostly had to deal with the The Black Mould Chair being broken over their heads. Now, students have to deal with that and gut-shots
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Feature : The Shitbox Societ
Vic students know how dire the situation can be.
Billy*, a landlord of 32 years and six current residential properties, backed this up. When he first came to Wellington 24 years ago, he rented his first property out for about $100 per room. Now, his rents are closer to $210 per room, “and I’m still on the light end of the market.” Elsewhere it’s getting closer to $330. A full time job is an increasing necessity to even afford rent, let alone expenses. Carmel* and Daria* have had to work 30-40 hour weeks for most of their university life— and Carmel currently has to illegally sublet off friends. Most students who talked to me were either working jobs as well as studying, or were in flats where most people did.
Those unable to get jobs are being priced out. Jacob was pushed out of Wellington completely, and studies by distance in Hawkes Bay. Aaron* moved to Wellington after time in prison. He says that it’s now impossible to get a job other than orcharding or packhousing. The financial strain is impossible. It means he has to rely entirely on his student allowance, leaving only $50 after rent. “I could have gone back to selling drugs, but I left that part of my life behind and suffered for it.” Sarah and Billy put this down to rising house prices and the boom of property managers in the early 2000s. Both say that while property managers existed, there were way fewer, and they’ve since inflated the market. According to MBIE, property managers charge between 7.5% and 8.5% of rents. That means a rent of $200pw would otherwise be $183, $250pw would be $228. Sarah said, “they periodically [...] advise their clients to raise the rent to align it with “the market”. [But] the market rates are only increasing at the rates they are because property managers advise their clients to increase rents.” Meanwhile, house prices in Wellington have also been soaring; while only increasing 8.75% between November 2007 and 2015, they rose 81.61% in the following five years. As Billy points out, anyone wanting to maintain a steady return on an investment needs to increase rent with the price. $50,000 a year is a 5% return on a one million dollar property, but only a 4% return on 1.2 million dollars. And with interest rates low, borrowing money to invest in property is easier and provides higher returns than bank interest rates.
“there’s a lot of hidden homelessness, students living on their friend’s couch kind of homelessness.” “It’s usually not their fault.” Erica notes that students’ housing problems compound. Increased rates of illness affect grades, flat hunting stress is debilitating, movement out of the city hikes transport costs, and the growing need for jobs is overtaking study time. Students also emphasised the emotional impact of their housing conditions. Carmel found it demoralising to be denied decent flats because landlords may not trust students, despite being an otherwise ideal tenant. Tamatha even suggests that there’s an entire section of Wellington’s housing stock “dedicated” to students because they’re such low quality. Siobahn* talked about the endless feedback loop she went through. “It’s not a priority for you to worry about making it to your classes if you can’t even pay rent. Sometimes you can’t even pay rent because your mental state is not in the right space for you to actually be at a job.”
For particular communities, it can be worse. Tamatha recalls people she knows removing “ethnic” names from applications. In Siobahn’s first flat of five Samoan girls, their white-passing flatmate took up communicating with the landlord so she would assume the rest were white. Tamatha has also heard from disabled students struggling to find flats, let alone accessible ones. With limited supply and a highly competitive market, there’s another issue: with multiple streams of income, student The property investment and property management groups can afford to pay more than many working class businesses also cause issues for supply. Vetting out families, especially Māori and Pasifika families. “People students, rents soaring with and because of house prices, take advantage with substandard rentals because they and conversion to family homes means more students are know students and working class people will fight over struggling to even find flats. Sarah says there were still scraps.” hectic lines for flat viewings when she was studying, but everyone found a place. Pasifika Student Council President, Grace Peia, says that once many Pasifika students go into flats they Not so for Louis, fresh out of halls, who says he won’t tend to take substandard rentals on the chin—“there be able to get a flat. He will need to board with his are bigger fish to fry.” While she says flatting standards grandparents. He says every decision around Wellington are unacceptable, “you can’t worry about housing if you has been a lesser of two evils compromise, “which is a bit can’t even get your foot in the door with university.” She shit considering uni and moving out are meant to be the doesn’t see the Shitbox Experience as a rite of passage, golden days.” just a reality that Pasifika students have to go through to be able to walk across the stage at graduation. When she was a lecturer, Sarah says she saw student homelessness escalate quickly since 2014. Previously The Queer community faces increasingly documented she says homelessness was usually a result of other hurdles with housing, with disproportionate rates of difficulties like mental illness, but not anymore. VUWSA’s abuse, mental illness, and homelessness, especially for Erica the Advocate agrees, blaming scarcity and cost, trans and non-binary renters. Particular legal issues also www.salient.org.nz
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“Rose tinted glasses from the older generation” is the main sentiment.
arise; renters may have problems using deadnames on tenancy agreements. Recently, Kristine Ablinger was kicked out of her apartment for being trans, with only three hours notice as anti-discrimination laws don’t apply when tenants live with their landlords. So, what do students think about having to deal with a reality others deny? Responses ranged from “yeah that’s total bullshit imo” to “fucking satanic”. Erica the Advocate called it “rediculous and offensive”. “Rose tinted glasses from the older generation” is the main sentiment. Narratives like the Shitbox Experience are called “myths” by media students. In terms even I could understand, myths occur when a person or community’s past experiences are assumed to still apply to radically different times or conditions. The Quarter Acre Dream is a myth. While New Zealand used to be a country of comparatively high homeownership, ballooning prices leave the dream mostly dead. Despite this, Stuff still publishes stories about how it’s still possible, if you don’t eat for three years and buy in Bulls with a small $100,000 loan from your parents. Morten Gendre, Associate Professor at the School of Architecture, specialises in urban planning and development. Both he and Carmel point to why the Shitbox Experience exists. Morten thinks “a lot of it comes out of the Dunedin experience. Going down there and living rough in Dunedin.”
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Feature : The Shitbox Society
Carmel puts it down to two reasons. First, she agrees our parents’ generation have rose tinted glasses. “They’ve forgotten how miserable it was. They remember the camaraderie, the fun of it, and they connect it with a lack of responsibility—which may have been the case back when [...] they could just work holidays.” Secondly, she notes the public perception of students, “there’s this perception of students being drunk, lazy, apathetic, just studying for the free money. And because of that stereotype some people seem to think we deserve to struggle a bit.” And, as any media student will tell you, myths usually hold up existing power structures. As Daria says, “this narrative exists in order to undermine the lived experiences of students. If society deemed what was happening to be acceptable then things would change, but it’s to the advantage of the wealthy [...] to keep students living the way they currently do.”
By making the Shitbox expected for the majori aren’t as threatened as th By making the Shitbox Experience normal or expected for the majority of people, landlords aren’t as threatened as they otherwise would be. Daria’s first two flats were terrible. As well as black mould, holey windows, rats and mice, she had mushrooms growing around the toilet, damp pantries, and faulty circuit boards. Unsurprisingly, flatting made
Daria alternately angry and depressed. Especially as organisations like the Tenancy Tribunal and MBIE can be difficult to deal with. MBIE ignored Daria’s complaints and she, and other students, are worried to go to the tribunal in case they get informally blacklisted as a “problem tenant”. Some landlords, of course, do their jobs. Abby’s current landlords are one of her favourite points of conversation. They only increased rent last year to cover rates and respond quickly to repairs. Billy also keeps his rents steady, “buys right”, and is basically a full time landlord as a builder by trade. Many students said, however, they just feel like any variety of their landlord’s personal ATM, cash cow, money bags, or free money tree. The future doesn’t look like it’s going to immediately improve. Bill, Tamatha, and Sarah think future homeownership for students in Wellington is a nonstarter. Billy pointed out that some of the biggest landlords in the country primarily focus on the recentgraduate market, charging $500 a week for small, singlebedroom units. He thinks we’re going to have to get used to long term rentals. The future, it seems, is flatting.
City Council has run social housing has turned it, the country’s third largest landlord, into the country’s largest slumlord. Morten, however, points to specific examples of higher density and higher quality housing that blend into the characteristics of their neighbourhoods. He also thinks the council has done well with its recent renovations of Arlington Apartments. But ultimately, these are isolated cases, rather than a comprehensive plan. The big challenge, however, is the culture and systems the Shitbox Society plays into. As Billy says, “it’s always going to be more in favour of the landlord. The landlord will be the one who’s going to be there the longest because the tenants come and go. A lot of landlords just roll them over every year and then they’ll just keep increasing [rent].”
This is not an easy thing to change. The Shitbox Experience is a filter that many of our parents and grandparents actually see the world through. A good start is myth busting—wherever you can, challenge the idea that it’s okay to let students drown in a sea of lung infections and depression. Use your own experiences, In fact, a lot of people think that. Tam, Daria, Carmel, in your own words, to get people to buck the fuck up. and Renters United all have pretty much the same pitch You can do this in your own life, or on a bigger scale. for post-Quarter Acre living—the European Model. This Contact the media about your dodgy property manager basically provides for longer term rentals, with more rights or windowless room. Ask people like Grant Robertson (the for tenants to modify the property to make it their own Wellington Central MP and Minister for Finance) why his home. government want house prices to continue rising. Submit on the Council’s goddamn spatial plan, it’s going to direct the next two years of urban development in Wellington, and will otherwise be another opportunity to kick the can down the road. And, of course, you can support or join advocacy services like Renters United or VUWSA.
Experience normal or ity of people, landlords hey otherwise would be.
Solutions for student flatting are varied and contentious. Billy says that increasing regulations are pushing rents up and old landlords out. Both he and Morten think that public-private developments are the way to go. Social housing has the potential to work. But while Tamatha and Morten are optimistic, Morten points to the Kāinga Ora model; they’re both still waiting on Central Government. Billy is more pessimistic, saying that the way Wellington
The risk is that the Shitbox Experience turns into the Shitbox Society. We shouldn’t have to pay more for a decent flat, but there’s shitloads we can do to help get everyone a home. *Names changed Salient reached out to Ngāi Tauira for comment but they were unavailable. Support: Erica and Alice VUWSA Advocates: advocate@vuwsa.org.nz Pasifika Student Success: https://bit.ly/3drRAim Āwhina Māori Student Support: https://bit.ly/3s9USef Citizens Advice Bureau: https://www.cab.org.nz/ www.salient.org.nz
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a n i t t i o s e n D
Wellington Lachlan Ewing (he/him) In these uncertain times, I often find solace in the words of the poet Dizzee Rascal. I was particularly struck by an uplifting verse recited over an honest, raw synth, building to crescendo:
“Get your passport and your bikini You need a holiday, come see me I know you’re tired of the same old scenery And I could change all that so easily” The rest of the world is closed to us, with clouds of apprehension and anxiety swirling. Rent likely consumes 80-100% of your Studylink living costs. Understandably, a holiday may be the last thing on your mind. However, a perfect, affordable destination to avoid the second week come-down is right on your doorstep: our very own Wellington.
Accomodation Wellington offers a plethora of accommodation options to the student holidaymaker, from the rustic to the downright dank. High end, younger travellers may opt to stay in one of the University’s halls of residence. At $400+ a week, they are an absolute steal! A top recommendation is Weir House. Weir gracefully straddles Wellington’s past and present. There is the old-school charm of
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Feature : Destination Wellington
columns and ghosts, with Weir being regularly cited on reputable blogs as one of Wellington’s “Top Ten Haunted Sites!” An anonymous resident reported thick clouds of mango flavoured mist billowing from windows, and moans heard late into the night. This antiquity is complemented by the newer James Hutchinson wing, up to date with Wellington’s latest architectural trend of shutting down for earthquake stabilisation. Be wary not to be caught in the crossfires of rivalry. Hall residents are known to react viciously to rival residents entering contested areas such as the safety bus and Siglo deck. If you are not careful, you may find yourself struck by a stinging “up the fuckin poon!” Ouch. To truly immerse yourself in the local culture, however, consider staying in one of Wellington’s student flats. Whether you’re a shoebox apartment Sharon, or a rotting villa Reggie, there is something for everyone (who replies to an offer within the first five minutes, can provide four character references and is willing to compromise on legal rights). While they may lack the legacy of Dunedin’s famous flats, they compete with them in coldness and far exceed them in price. You are sure to be the envy of your highschool friends’ next drinks when they hear how rough you live in Wellington. Basic packages are available from $200-250 per week. Optional extras include electricity and gas.
Activities Unlike adequate accommodation, there are an abundance of fun things to do and see in Wellington, that won’t hurt the wallet. Zealandia When asked to recommend a favourite spot, student Tom Andrews didn’t hesitate to name Zealandia. Half an hour’s walk, or a short bus ride from Kelburn Campus, Zealandia is the world’s first fully-fenced urban ecosanctuary. It is home to over forty species of native bird, from kiwi to kākā to kererū. Tom took his girlfriend there on their first date, and “loved seeing the rifleman, as it is such a cute little ball”. Apparently, the bird sounds are “both angelic and intriguing”. A student may balk at the $19.50 admission. However, it is the equivalent of sacrificing twelve cruisers. The entire admission funds the future of biodiversity in NZ, and you may even be lucky enough to find a Tuatara, or love. Hawkins Hill If you prefer to get your kicks for free, a walk up Hawkins Hill is this writer’s top recommendation. Head up to the Brooklyn wind turbine, and keep going into the hills on Hawkins Hill Road. The climb to Hawkins
Hill, 495m above sea level, offers the best panoramic views of Wellington around. Forget about Mount Vic—at 196m, that’s little league in comparison. Wellington’s premier dog retreat is also nestled in these rugged hills. V Woofington’s is a large castle that offers luxury dog stays. I don’t quite understand it, but it is a wonder to behold. A vainglorious attempt at canine immortality; a beacon from which to broadcast lonesome howl to the Southern skies. In addition, there is a huge radar ball at the top of the hill, views of the South Island, a track that continues to the South Coast, and WWII bunkers. On a clear day, head for the hills for a megadose of the weird and wonderful.
Pub Quiz The highlight of the week’s night life is Tuesday night at the JJ Murphy’s pub quiz. Kicking off at 7:30 p.m., it pays to arrive early for this eight course degustation of trivia. Relax into a homely timber booth. Don’t stress about winning the quiz, as the same three teams of septuagenarians rotate among the podium positions every week. However, there is grog to be won for comedic answers, so be sure to bring your wits.
Dining All of this walking, drinking, and quizzing is sure to leave you hungry. If you are craving a break from hall/flat food, try these local’s favourite spots: Tom Andrews, Golden Gate Takeaways “A more homely alternative to Mt Vic chippery” is how Tom described Golden Gate. For cheap, tasty fish and chips, this is a go-to. On the corner of College Street and Cambridge Terrace, Golden Gate is handy to Oriental Bay and the boat sheds, Central Wellington’s premier fish and chip consuming locations. Tom had always found the boat sheds intimidating and stereotypical. When he got up there with some mates, a bottle of wine and his Golden Gate bundle of joy, however, everything changed. The sun set on a stressful week and they experienced a “lovely decompression”. Tom realised that Wellington had, at last, made itself his second home.
Serena, Seoul Salon Serena discovered a hidden gem tucked away on Willis Street. On the same block as well-known establishments like The Arborist, Capital Market, The George, and Burger Liquor, Seoul Salon seems to fly under the radar. The cuisine is described as “contemporary East Asian, mostly Korean and Japanese with a twist.” Very little on the menu is above $20, and Serena raved about the delicious vegetarian options, especially the gochujang sauce, which was “like a delectable firework in your mouth.” Serena found the service amazing and caring, and enjoyed a wholesome vibe. Be sure to try the umeshu, a Japanese plum wine.
Sven, Sweet Mother’s Kitchen Sven made my job easy, and had a lot to say about his favourite restaurant. Here is a small excerpt: “Down past that wretched hive of scum and villainy—Courtney Place—stands Sweet Mother’s Kitchen like an oasis in the desert. It is the single best reason to walk that stretch. When I first came to Wellington, my drama teacher took my class to Sweet Mother’s. It’s my happy place. You’re immediately accosted by Mardi Gras decor. The menu follows suit: Cajun staples peppered with Latin and Mexican favourites. Get the Cuban (with cumback sauce on the side), the prawn Monica, and some Hush Puppies alongside your curly fries. Finish with beignets— always beignets. It’s all divine, of course, but someone said something about loving despite instead of loving because. I love Sweet Mother’s despite the grimy toilet, the sometimes slow service, the sometimes too-low frying temperatures leading to pale fries, and the sometimes forgetting to renew their liquor license in time for Wellington On a Plate. It is like your mother’s warmth: soothing for your body and soul.”
Conclusion There is always something to do in the coolest little capital, and it doesn’t always have to be your readings or binge drinking. Give yourself a break, and go enjoy the city. As that ominous concrete slab by the waterfront reminds us:
It is true you can’t live here by chance, you have to do and be, not simply watch or even describe, this is the city of action, The world headquarters of the verb— www.salient.org.nz
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NICK a WILKEY
Kia Ora, I’m Nick, a creator and a dreamer looking to explore the realms of possibility through the transformative power of art and architecture. Currently based in the sunny Hawkes Bay, I recently graduated with a Masters in Architecture from Victoria University of Wellington. Throughout my degree, the act of drawing and its exploratory potential became a key part to the development of my projects. This continual exploration culminated in my thesis project, which delved into the links between architecture, drawing and the shadow. Seeking to translate both tangible (physical) and intangible (mythological, philosophical, ephemeral) aspects of the Shadow in architecture, the discoveries made throughout this year of study propelled my artistic practice in a new direction. It showed that the drawing not only serve as a means of representation but as a rich multi-layered process capable of expressing thoughts, emotions and ideas.
Full moon energy, ink on paper, 2020
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The act of drawing, the translating of ink to paper, the lines, marks, scratches and blurs that embed themselves in the pigment, carry metaphysical qualities that aren’t directly interpretable, but call upon the creative imagination of the viewer to form new meanings and narratives. Since graduating, I’ve been attempting to continue this line of inquiry, often blurring the line between representation and reality, embedding the drawings and images with hidden meanings that spring up new associations and inspire introspection, reflection and contemplation.
Artistic practices have become a way for me to explore ideas beyond the narrow technical parameters of the architecture profession. Freed from the bounds of construction logic and building regulations, art has the ability to engage a wider audience in the hope that it may inspire, engage and form meaningful, transformative experiences. Shadows seem to be a prominent feature in my work, often shifting the perception of the image, adding a sense of depth and space to the two-dimensional plane. Often seeking to break the picture plane, and create a sense of 3-dimensionality on a 2D surface, the drawings and illustrations force your eye to scan the page, searching for a space of resolution. At the core of my work is the desire to find meaning in the unknown, to contemplate the human condition and to transcend the boundaries of menial reality.
Beyond a Shadow of a Doubt, ink on paper, 2020
Check out my instagram for creative content that stirs the soul, get in touch if any of the works featured spark your interest. I’m always open for commissions of any sort, usually spanning from logo design, custom artworks, to architectural concepts. I’m hoping to do heaps more creative and collaborative projects this year, follow along on my instagram to keep up with the shenanigans! Arohanui x @nicka.wilkey nicka.wilkey@gmail.com
The Quest, acrylic on canvas, 2020
Student’s Guide to Parking for Free in Wellington R. Whaitiri, Kāti Māmoe, Ngāti Hine (she/her) So you’re a student who can afford a car, but you don’t want to pay for parking. I don’t blame you. The Wellington City Council likes parking revenue, and students need a break. Because I’m an absolute G, I’ve decided to bestow upon you, the next generation of lawbreakers, five years of wisdom I’ve acquired parking on a student budget in Wellington. Here is a weathered Wellingtonian’s guide to hacking the parking in this godforsaken city. It’s mostly a what-not-to-do, leaving you to get creative and take gambles in some of the safer zones identified. It will let you know what you’re up against. Work smarter, not harder.
*Tickets* Parking tickets range from $12 (overstaying for 30 mins to an hour) to $57 (overstaying for more than 6 hours). It is good to know that you can appeal a parking ticket via the Wellington City Council website. Some reasons for appealing can be that a mistake was made on the ticket, or you were dealing with an emergency. This could include a doctors appointment. So if you’ve rushed into student health and ended up with a ticket— at what was probably the worst timing—you can appeal it. You do need supporting evidence…see the Council website. Have a go.
*Free(?) parking near Kelburn Campus*
*Half day free camping (pretty much) on Kelburn Campus*
A road in Kelburn which may or may not be NELG backwards, which is in a two hour coupon parking zone. It is a 7 minute walk to Kelburn Campus. I won’t be providing anymore information; you have to take your own risks. I can say that I have previously parked boldly on this street and it has paid off. It could be classified as a safe zone.
A block closer to Kelburn Campus from the aforementioned road, you’ll find a road that may or may not be UMIR backwards, which also has two hour coupon parking. This puts you at about a five minute walk to campus. I have received tickets on this street. If you’re getting there in the morning you’ve got about six hours maximum. If you try for the full day, you’ll likely end up with a ticket. If you get there after midday, you might be sweet to leave it there long after parking restrictions lift at six.
The other option is to go up into the hills behind the Kelburn shops and look for unrestricted parking areas. This takes you quite far from campus. You might have to go for an evening walk back to your car while the birds are singing. Heaps of tui up there.
Parking at Kelburn Park is also limited at 2 hours. I’ve left my car there for more than four hours without problems. Afternoons only. www.salient.org.nz
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The Red Zone: Kelburn Campus
Extended free parking around town*
If you tempt the parking restrictions on Salamanca Road, Kelburn Parade, Fairlee Terrace, or Glasgow Street, then you’re just asking for a hiding. Once as a cocky second year I parked in a five minute spot for six minutes on Kelburn Parade and got a ticket. I took the L on that ticket because I straight up deserved it. If you want one of the two hour parking spots in this zone, you also need to be there by 8 a.m. Attempting to park here any later than that will be fruitless. You’ll end up trying to parallel park into a space barely big enough for a scooter, with an oncoming bus.
This is one of those things that you don’t think you need to know until all of a sudden you do. I’ve already mentioned *that* Road, but if you’re looking for spots on the other side of town then I’ve got two options for you. Grafton Road just up from the Hataitai shops is a good place to leave your car for extended periods because there’s no restrictions. Just make sure your rego is current because people have been popped there before in random checks. Your other option is Mansfield Street at the zoo end of Newtown. I know people who’ve gotten away with parking up to 3 days here, but haven’t actually done so myself. Best of luck.
Extras for Experts If you’re happy paying a small amount for parking on campus, you can get subsidised parking passes from VUWSA. This is for the paid parking on Wai-te-Ata Road, below the gym that I mentioned before. If you’re in those Red Zone parking spots, set a timer every two hours.
Dodging a ticket in the Wai-te-Ata Road paid parking There are multiple pay stations at this Kelburn campus paid parking area. It’s not your fault if they’re broken. Here’s what you do. It is super easy to just leave a note on your windshield saying “Machine is broken :) [+ time, date, and your phone number].” Use this sparingly and truthfully.
Pipitea and Te Aro campuses Honestly I don’t know what to tell you fullas. Parking in town means you pretty much have to use the parking apps because the pay stations never work. At least you have a timer to remind you when time is running out. If I can offer one piece of advice for parking at these campuses, I would just say go big or go home. Park on the lawn at Te Aro. Show the pigeons who’s boss. Park at the feet of Peter Fraser’s statue at the Government Buildings like the ruthless law student you are.
Parking wardens are human beings If you take nothing else from this guide, please remember this: do not bar up to the parking wardens. They don’t make the rules, and they don’t get paid enough for the shit they get dealt. Parking wardens get paid less than a living wage to funnel money to a Mayor who can’t even run a council meeting. If you get caught, take it up with the Council over email. Speak to a manager. Just don’t bother these poor people who walk the Wellington streets every day, rain, gales, or shine.
So there you have it, a student’s guide to making the Wellington parking system your bitch. And you thought the parking fairy didn’t exist.
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Feature : Student Parking Guide / Column : Shits Fucked, Shits Good
SHIT'S FUCKED Mayor sells off central library - By Vaipe Nache Wellington Mayor Andy Foster put the fuck into “fuck sakes” last week as he surprised councillors with a lastminute proposal to sell off half of the Wellington Central Library.
Journalist Emma Espiner echoes this, tweeting: “We had no money [growing up] so there’s no way mum could have kept up with my appetite for reading if we couldn’t access the library. I feel sick thinking about what my childhood would have been like without it.”
His amendment was accepted, but other city councillors are fuming. They said privatising the library ignores As well as the sell-off, each library’s new book budget will be previous consultation suggesting the library remain a slashed by 40%. public good, and added they had not received enough time to debate the amendment properly. Foster, in his immediate response, suggested that councillors should focus on deferring climate and Foster defended the privatisation as a “creative” way to wastewater investment. Which is ironic, given that he has establish a “community owned” central library. I reckon been a councillor for 30 years, and that he voted against Foster is just scared of children who use the library increasing the climate budget the previous day. becoming more literate than him, because selling public assets was only creative in the fucking 80s, and it got old Public libraries are an essential public service, especially really, really fast. for those unable to buy books themselves. They provide accessible and cheap reading for the entire community to I’m not the only one who’s pissed off about this. Students enjoy, research, and learn. It’s a real shame they’re being are pissed. My parents are pissed. Members of the privatised because of a Mayor who can’t work with his own community are pissed. councillors.
SHIT'S GOOD Boil up - By Kane Bassett, Ngāti Apa, Ngāti Kahungunu ki te Wairoa (he/him) I’m proud to call myself a vegetarian, but some meat dishes just aren’t worth giving up. These include tīpuna recipes, or recipes handed down by my grandparents. Specifically, it includes boil up. Boil up is a Māori dish made of pork meat and bones, something green (watercress, pūhā, silverbeet and cabbage are most common), spuds, salt, and water. Some use more ingredients, like carrot, kamo kamo, and doughboys, but the first few are all you’ll need to suss yourself a decent rendition. Boil up feeds mouths, and lots of them. My nanny used to make it for all five of her living children, and says one pot would feed the whole whānau for days on end. She still makes it for all of us, but with each of her mokos now lining up for a bowl as well, it definitely doesn’t last as long. The taste level is 100% there, too. It’s salty, but not too salty. It’s hearty, but not heavy. It has a perfect balance
between meat and veg, and makes your house smell incredible, too. The dish became popular among Māori after the arrival of European settlers, who introduced potatoes, pigs, and metal pots to Aotearoa. Soon came the oven, which helped with keeping a steady heat on the pots. If you want to make it yourself, throw some pork bones into a big pot of water and gently heat it for the better part of one day (around 5-6 hours). Chuck your potatoes and greens into the pot 45 minutes before you want to eat it, and bam, you’re done. Wash your hands, get a bowl, grab the salt, and dig in. There are few things more special to me than knowing I’m eating the same food my ancestors did too. Straight shoutouts to them, and to their resourcefulness, for putting together this banger of a kai for us.
www.salient.org.nz
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Frankie Dale (she/her)
Sex and dating advice from Wellington’s rankest, pessimistic, anxious, and most dramatic woman. Every year we try we come up with resolutions on how to better ourselves—last year mine was to use condoms every time I had sex with someone new. Unfortunately, during a passionate thirst a couple months ago, all my inhibitions went out the window and I was back to carelessly feigning my body out to men who probably wouldn’t even go halves on the ECP with me. My point here is that we need to stop attempting to make these grand changes in our life, and just simply change our perspective. At 10 a.m. on a Monday I slid into someone I’ve slept with twice and haven’t spoken to in 2 years DM’s. Verbatim, “hello, I don’t know if this is crazy but are you interested in a day time booty call?”—he replied with an image of him doing a facepalm, and we haven’t spoken since. While I should be embarrassed about this, I have simply decided that I’m not. It’s all about perspective, baby. If you’re like me, and go into every new year expecting to miraculously not be attracted to assholes anymore—and to maybe quit vaping after getting tonsillitis six times— let’s talk about changing our outlook and owning our shit. I actually had sex with a boy who didn’t make me want to gouge my eyeballs out. He made consent sexy, respected my body, and actually cared about foreplay. He also reads feminist literature for his own enjoyment (as opposed to my ex who religiously listened to Mike Hosking), and has two pillows, so naturally it left me questioning my past statments about men in Wellington. Although we probably aren’t soul mates, my encounters with him have made me realise that the bar for men doesn’t have to be so low. That we all do deserve to feel like we are respected and heard, especially when someone is literally inside of you. Being genuinely used to people pushing my head into a pillow like I’m not
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Columns : To Be Frank / $10 Jugs
there is no longer the norm. Consent and respect is fucking epic and if someone isn’t asking, dont be afraid to call them out. The thing that I’ve learnt this summer is that we are gonna do what we want at the end of the day. We need to stop lying to ourselves. We are going to go home with our ex from that party, we are going to shave our pubes before our meeting with our SOSC lecturer, and we are going to stop saying “I’m seriously done with him. Like, that was the last time.” We don’t always make the best decisions, but that’s okay. There is a reason I don’t wear white bikinis to the beach on my period anymore, but I learnt from that and feeling ashamed just isn’t productive. Bettering yourself is sexy AF even if it’s small steps. Stop being ashamed of shit, it helps no one. In saying that, it’s about taking back the control. There is such a double standard for men and women reaching out to have sex, or just even a date. Like, am I seriously going to be considered a psycho cause I messaged you first because I have a vagina? I just wanna bone you, not bare your first born. It’s not embarrassing for a woman to reach out first. And most importantly, avoid fucking people who don’t see us as the undeniably gorgeous, sexy creatures we are. Shamelessly own your shit for the sake of your confidence and overall mental wellbeing. To all my sexy readers, you deserve more than someone aggressively fingering you at 4 a.m. in a damp flat in Aro Valley. Although it seems hard and sometimes impossible, changing your perspective, being honest with yourself and taking back the control (even if it means lying to yourself) is a cocktail for an easier life.
D4 on Allen Street Size:
3 pints
Availability:
Open Wednesday - Saturday
D4 is the home to 70 gins, but all I care for is their $10 jug. The bar has two locations—one on Featherston Street, the fancy end of town, and one on the party side of town. This week we are looking to Allen street, their spot just off of Courtney Place. “D4 on Allen is Courtenay Place’s newest craft beer and boutique wine bar,” says their sign. We really are talking about one of the craftiest beverages I’ve ever had: Wild Buck.
On the company’s websites it states that it is “made with our best local hops, malts and pure water.” I can attest to the water being very pure. The drink does it’s job in the best way. Those who I spoke to around me have said that it is one of the most “inoffensive pints they have consumed.”
Wild Buck is a New Zealand Ale that came out back in about the mid 2000’s, from what was then known as Independent Liquor (now owned by Asahi). Independent produces Ranfurly Draught, another beverage of eerily similar alcohol level and taste. There has been a conspiracy that they are the exact same beverage in different packaging. This is pure speculation.
When I talked to my tasting partner, they said that it was like a cider—if a cider had no sugar in it. It was also his favourite, because it has no aftertaste whatsoever.
I would typify the target demographic of Wild Buck drinkers as beer drinkers who like to get value for money. If not for being on tap at venues around Wellington, I have not seen it too much at flat parties. I may be going to the wrong parties, but that does not mean I’m out of the loop, just a consumer who spends too much time at venues with $10 jugs. But those who do drink Wild Buck are legends in their own right. As the words on the side of one of their boxes say—more beer for your buck. This is a value beer, for valuable people. It is described as an amber coloured ale, and from my best understanding it is beyond straightforward. Like, this beer was made for those who do not like beer; it’s as close to water as Te Papa is. There’s not much more to say. Growing up drinking Lion Red on my uncle Leo’s back lawn, I never saw the day when I would be a proud drinker of another standard New Zealand 4% beer. But, at $10 for 3 pints, how can I not be proud of such a beer.
This is a value beer, for valuable people.
The geographical location of D4 is quite good; it is north-west facing, which allows for a nice little flirtation with the sun. It also seems like somewhere you would not accidentally run into that dude from the halls that you haven’t really spoken to since but they always stop to yarn to you for ages about a whole bunch of nothing much. They won’t be at D4, so I think that’s pretty cool. D4’s name is from the postcode in Ireland that the owners come from—I think this is a pretty neat idea. It makes me think that if I were to open a bar in Ireland, I would call it 6011, representing my lovely 5 person flat in Te Aro. The music is an eclectic mix ranging from “Take Me Home Country Roads”, through to Pitbull classics. This is interesting music for a modern Irish bar. When I was there doing research, I was fortunate enough to catch a game of rugby on a Saturday afternoon, and that’s the exact time I would recommend going. Wild Buck has a special place in my heart and stomach. I found D4 to be a very good venue, noting that I am not a frequent visitor. This is, to my best knowledge, the biggest $10 Jug in Wellington. If you know otherwise, send me an email at jugs@salient.org.nz
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Your friendly guide through the trials and tribulations of student living. Rant about your flatting issues and we’ll find a solution.
By Ash Bestos
Question of the week:
“My flatmates never do their dishes and I always end up doing them. I don’t know how to tell them to clean them up without sounding passive aggressive.” First off, let me commend you for taking on the task of touching the old food your flatmates have oh-sograciously left for you. I personally hate doing the dishes, so I can relate to getting annoyed. Especially when you need to use something you can see has been left unwashed and no one owns up to having used it, even though you specifically remember seeing Joe use the whisk to make meringues at 3 a.m. Apart from just letting the dishes pile up until someone else cracks and does them, which might never happen, start with a simple conversation. Casually ask people if they wouldn’t mind doing some of their dishes. The tricky part here is, like you said, finding a way to not sound passive aggressive. It’s a fine line, but keeping a friendly tone and not sounding demanding should help.
face some backlash. Their true colours might show if they take major offense to being called out. Just remember that you are in the right. Out of all the common issues that can arise in a flatting situation, this is a pretty good hill to die on. Depending on how long this issue has been festering, talking about it may not lead anywhere. It might solve the issue for a day or two, but there’s a chance it could resort back to you doing all the dishes alone. At this point, throw all your cares about being passive aggressive out the window, and start making the dishes a problem that extends further than the kitchen.
You can start small. Try only washing the dishes you need and make them inaccessible to your other flatmates. If that doesn’t give them the kick they need to start doing If casual conversation doesn’t seem to be working, your the dishes, then up the ante. Start leaving them out where next step would be holding a flat meeting to talk about they eat, slowly making their placement more annoying. it. Implementing a rule that everyone cleans their own Get creative! Shove them in the shower when you know dishes after using them can be a good way to combat the they’re about to use it. If anything, they’ll get some hot issue. If you cook shared flat meals, a flat rule could be water on them, and possibly a bit of soap if they’re lucky. that whoever cooked that night doesn’t have to do those Eventually have them piled up outside the offender’s dishes, but everyone else has to. That way it isn’t left to bedroom door. Is it passive aggressive? Yes. Will it get one person, and it’s easy enough to shame people who try the point across? Most likely. Will it cause conflict? Quite to dodge the dishes into helping. possibly, but if you get to this stage that’s what you’re looking for. People don’t like being called out on things that they know—morally—they should already be doing. You might Need a flat disagreement sorted out? Crushing on a flatmate and don’t know what to do about it? Want to know if you’re the asshole? From minor issues to major ones, send a question to flatchat@salient.org.nz
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Columns : Flat Chat / PSC / Vuwsa
Pasifika Students' Council Noa’ia, Mauri, Ni Sa Bula Vinaka, Fakaalofa lahi atu, Tālofa, Kia orana, Mālō e lelei, Mālō nī, Talofa lava, Tēnā koutou katoa, and warm Pacific greetings to you all. My name is Grace Ugapo Nellie Peia and I have the honour and privilege to lead our Pasifika Student Council as your President for 2021.
PSC was happy to see the new students with so much potential and energy at the Welcome Festival. We came away with the win as the hall without walls that won the cup! We as a team can’t wait to get to know you guys as a family. Let’s keep that same energy, and remember that we’ve always got your back. Arohanui, your Pasifika Student Council.
Under my leadership, your brothers and sisters who make up your exec are working hard to put together an action plan for the year with the right balance of fun and hard work.
Michael Turnbull (he/him) VUWSA President Kia ora koutou, As only 2021 could, the year has kicked off to a suitably unpredictable start. But luckily, through it all, there has been one shining glimmer of light. O-Week pulled through. I have no doubt that the mighty resurgence of O-Week will stand as a guiding metaphor for the year ahead. Fingers crossed you all recovered well enough for Tuesday classes. Now, into business. With the first week of classes over, you’re probably back into some form of diurnal academic rhythm. Whether you’ve based at Pip, Te Aro, or Kelburn, it’s good to be back on campus and soaking up the beautiful mismatch of architecture that is Te Herenga Waka.
The team here at VUWSA have been well underway planning and prepping for the year ahead. If you haven’t already gotten one of our highly regarded wall calendars, pop by the office and see if we’ve got any spares lying around (or steal one from your flatmates wall). With O-Week behind us, we can start focusing on our advocacy and initiatives, so you’ll be seeing a lot more of our faces around campus, at our office, or in your lectures. If you’ve already signed up for a club, good shit! But there’s plenty of other ways to get involved in the Uni community. For example, you can stop by the Hunter Courtyard this Tuesday 2nd to get a free feed and learn about the largest farmers protest happening right now in India from the Wellington Sikh Society. In addition, next week from the 8th - 12th, VUWSA will be helping the VUW Women’s Collective host their annual Women’s Week. There’s a Hunter Lounge launch party on Monday night, and a number of exhibitions and expos based at Kelburn and Te Aro campuses across the week, including a wāhine-focused Market day on Thursday the 11th. So, there you have it! Who would have known Uni life continues post O-Week? Hopefully between all the excitement of the first couple weeks you find an opportunity to sit back, relax, and enjoy some Hunter Lounge pizza, or Vic Books coffee. www.salient.org.nz
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Mauri Ora Here We Go Again Kia ora tātou and welcome, finally, to 2021! We are UniQ, the queer students representative group, and we are the big gay entity behind this column. We want to extend the warmest welcome to you if you are new here, or pat you on the back and say “you’ll graduate someday” to you if you are a returning student.
Health Improvement Practitioner aka HIP aka HIPster is here to help.
This year we have a lot of big plans, made in an effort to use up all of the energy we reserved for events we were supposed to hold last year but got cancelled. Last year we were supposed to hold a Ball, so we are trying again this year. We are also making an appearance at Sex Week this year, marking the occasion by hosting a pop-up strip club, with information all about the intersect between the rainbow community and sex work.
The start of university can be a journey full of challenges to overcome, so it is completely normal if you have just noticed how tense those muscles are feeling. Take a big deep breath, thank the body for the heads up, and take actions you need towards your wellbeing. Maybe this means going for a walk, eating a nutritious meal, or reflecting on a thought that has been bothering you. Or maybe none of that helps and you have no idea what to do. That’s awesome as well! You have already taken the first step in recognising the issue, and simply having the desire to fix it, is all you need.
We also plan to host several events during the university Pride week (which is the second week of trimester two), ranging from a quiz and movie night to hopefully hosting a party at Ivy! If you want to get involved with us, come along to our weekly social spaces located at SU218 every Friday from 10am to 3pm. Its a great way to meet like-minded queer folk, play board games or even if you just need a place to chill. For those looking for an online space, we have a discord where we host movie nights and lively discussion. We also have our IGM at 5pm the 3rd March in AM101! We are looking for a new president and are always happy to see new faces and hear new ideas. If you need extra incentive, we provide free pizza for everyone that comes to the meeting. Feel free to message us at uniqvictoria@gmail.com Rosie van Beusekom (they/them), Ethan Wellington (he/him
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Columns : UniQ / Mauri Ora - Fringe Festival
Take a moment as you read this to notice your breath, your muscles, your heart rate, and how your tummy feels. How are you doing?
Cue the Health Improvement Practitioner’s (HIP) at Mauri Ora. HIPs can help with any stress or problem that is beginning to impact on everyday life. Examples of problems are sleep issues, attention in class, worry, sadness, relationship issues, fatigue, grief and more. We offer brief walk-in appointments for anyone enrolled at Mauri Ora for free. So, for the love of your wellbeing, come spend 30 minutes with us and walk out with an action plan to get you moving towards your enriched life. Ngā mihi, Jenna O’Connell the HIPster
Review
Wellington Fringe Festival
Fancy some Fringe? Janhavi Gosavi (she/her) This month, the culture capital of Aotearoa brings you the New Zealand Fringe Festival! From Feb 26 to March 20, performing arts will once again take over the city as the annual festival embarks on its 31st year. Pōneke is big on supporting our local creatives, so are three reasons you should get amongst Fringe: 1. It offers an extensive variety of performances Some may think that Fringe only contains theatre. Fringe can dish up comedy, music, circus, puppetry, dance, poetry, art exhibitions, and much more. Cassandra is a venue manager for Fat-G (Fringe at the Gryphon), and this year their programme includes improv shows, musical revues, new plays, and a live podcast recording. Cassandra first got involved with Fringe in 2013 and has seen her fair share, having been a performer, writer, producer, reviewer and narrative designer. She believes Fringe is special because of its experimental, out-of-the-box nature. Creators have the agency to try out their wacky and wonderful ideas, because Fringe doesn’t require them to submit to a programming board. “For audience members, this means they are guaranteed to see something they have never seen before at least once a festival”, she says. You can even find variety in Fringe’s venues. Bats, Circa, Gryphon, and Te Auaha are some well known theatres in central Wellington, but there are also Fringe shows happening at bars, on the streets, and at the waterfront. 2. It’s cheap and accessible Fringe brands itself as “New Zealand’s largest open access arts festival”. They pick their locations with care; out of the 51 venues in Wellington, 31 of them have wheelchair access. Money can be a huge barrier for both creators and audiences, so Fringe aims to minimise costs wherever possible. For audiences, this means cheap-as-chips tickets, which can be purchased from their website. A valid student ID makes you eligible for a concession ticket, and most of
these range from $10-$20. What’s more, roughly 25% of the shows are free, or simply require koha on entry. For creators, this means keeping their sign-up fees low. The cast of This Is Fine: A Musical supports this, saying Fringe is a “fun, accessible, and budget friendly” place for students to put on original shows. This Is Fine was first created by VUW students from THEA 302 in 2020. However, COVID-19 restrictions meant they weren’t able to put the show on last year, so instead they brought it to this year’s Fringe. This musical was inspired by the cast’s lockdown experiences, and explores collective anxiety and communicating solely through the internet. Zalan, their costume designer, said his previous design experience was limited, and that this was also his first musical. He’s not fussed about it—many Vic grads and first years alike use Fringe as a launching pad and sounding board to get feedback on original work. 3. It’s an accurate reflection of the Wellington theatre scene Everyone describes the Wellington theatre scene differently. Cassandra reckons theatre in Welly is “very grassroots and DIY”. ^This Is Fine^’s cast thinks it’s “innovative, queer, open, and accepting”. I think it’s about big talent, honest storytelling, and a creative use of minimal funds. Fringe is a culmination of all those qualities, and then some. If popular theatre is centered around Shakespeare and Broadway, Fringe explores performances that sit on the fringes of the mainstream. By throwing out the rule book, Fringe reminds audiences that raw theatre isn’t about perfection, it’s about creativity and community.
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Review
DOONS EP And San Fran Gig
The Importance of Being Indifferent Words and photos by Oli Cheyne (he/him)
Seemingly in some alternate history, where no bars were open and the streets were deserted, during the lost year called twenty-twenty, DOONS were hard at work writing and recording their second EP, The Importance of Being Indifferent. More than a year in the making, lockdown certainly gave some breathing room and provided an opportunity to fine tune the band’s latest release, which was let out to the world on January 13 this year. Regular attendees of DOONS gigs may be able to recall some of the tracks from a pre-Covid world, and recognise the evolution that they have undergone. The album’s infancy began at the end of 2019 during a trip up to the Kāpiti Coast, renting a bach in Peka Peka to write 2 Sides and Shallows, the latter being the first single released from the EP in February 2020. A second sojourn to the coast in October 2020 offered the band a perfect opportunity to crack out the lion’s share of the EP and track the songs in another bach in Waikawa Beach. The Importance of Being Indifferent marks an important milestone for the band. Being their second EP, it was an embodiment of personal change and development, and a thesis in sincerity and earnestness, coming out of an environment that has been somewhat impersonal and exclusive in recent years. DOONS singer Elliott points out “there is an element of acting like you don’t care within the music scene across New Zealand, and this EP was written as a way to get across the values of sincerity and honesty in your own music, and actually giving a shit”. Having the time to mull over the meaning of this within the music scene certainly has given their latest release a focused approach in calling out this type of indifference and apathy, breaking the ‘tall poppy’ trend and actually taking yourself seriously.
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Reviews : Doons EP And San Fran Gig
There has been an emerging community of independent artists and bands within Wellington, growing stronger and more supportive by the day, which DOONS has been a key part of. Harris says that over the past couple of years the band has been performing, they have found their place within the Welly music community. The community includes groups like Revulva and Eli Superflyy (Miss Cressida) who joined DOONS for the first leg of their EP release tour, playing San Fran on January 15. The San Fran gig proved to be the culmination of the work put in over the past 12 months for DOONS. Packing out San Fran on a hot Friday night, the set was electric and intense, holding the crowd for an hour of signature froth, opening with ‘The Floor’, and running through songs from their first EP. The songs of ^Importance were cathartic to hear in the space as complete pieces, played with an emotion that is rarely matched. The performance of ‘Stunted Growth’, featuring Lily Rose-Shaw (Revulva) on saxophone, perhaps best represented the change the band has undergone since their last release. From emotion to musicianship, ‘Stunted Growth’ has it all in spades. The night was jump started by Eli Superflyy, the solo project of the Miss Cressida frontman, with an energetic set packed with infectious melody and grooves. Following was nu-jazz Wellington super-group, Revulva, leading the crowd into trances and bops on a whim. Fronted by Phoebe Johnson on bass and vocals, Revulva reached unmarked territory through their sonic explorations. With their first single ‘Sniffly Lady’ to be released on 19 February, they are a must-see band in Wellington in the coming months. January was a big month for the boys of DOONS, as they embarked on their first nationwide excursion to celebrate the release of The Importance of Being Indifferent. Packing out their show in Auckland, they embarked to the South Island for the first time, playing Christchurch and Dunedin to crowded bars, even managing to squeeze a couple of sets in on the Inter Islander. With more things in the pipeline over the next couple of months, it would be wise to keep your eyes and ears peeled and get along to their next hoon.
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MC Tali & The Upbeats D’n’B Night Thursday 18th Feb
Electronic Night Friday 19th Feb
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O-week Pics / Poem
Ōtautahi, my dear ( I wish I could have warned you)
Ōtautahi, my dear (I wish I could have warned you) By Claire Broughton Ōtautahi my dear, today it is ten years since the first time I was woken by the ground shaking. I remember us marvelling at how lucky we were. Were we naïve to think that the worst was over? “Imagine if it had been daytime! Imagine if it had been closer to the city!” Ōtautahi, my dear, a part of me feels I should have known there was more to come. As soon as my mirror fell off the wall and hit the floor, I should have marched my ten-year-old feet into the square and warned you. But ‘aftershock’ was not yet in my ten-year-old vocabulary. Ōtautahi, my dear, this is what I would have told you: You should start to get ready, Ōtautahi. In a few months, the ground beneath you will tremble again. But it will not be like last time. Last time, it shuddered in the night, in the quiet. But this time, oh Ōtautahi, there will be noise, there will be so much noise. You will find out what it sounds like when buildings-splinter-and-bridges-break-androadscrack-and-windows-shatter-and-powerlines-snap-and-sirens-wail-and-tearsfall, all in the same moment. Ōtautahi, my dear, you will know the deafening sound of one hundred and eighty-five candles being snuffed out. And your heart Ōtautahi, the sound of your heart breaking. I remember that sound. And then, Ōtautahi, there will be silence. For a long time. A fog of mourning will settle at your heart, drifting out to your suburbs. We will be mourning you, Ōtautahi. I’m sorry if that feels like us giving up on you. It is hard to know what to do with a broken city. It is hard to know what to do when we are so, so tired. Ōtautahi, I’m sorry to say it, but I will be mad at you for a while. I know, now, that it was not your fault, but it is hard for a ten-year-old to not be angry when their city is taken away from them. I will just need some time. But Ōtautahi, my dear, do not lose hope. One day, we will come back. There will be new buildings and new roads and new sounds to fill your ears. There will be the sound of your heart healing, the sound of you coming out of hiding. There will be the sound of twenty-year old me, today, saying I am proud that you are my home. But Ōtautahi, my dear, you must know this: while we will never stop loving you, I would be lying if I said you will ever be the same again. So here is what I would have told you ten years ago, a few months before it all changed: Ōtautahi, my dear, you have a long hot summer ahead of you. Soak up the sun. Listen to the laughter in the Square. The cathedral bell ringing. The punting on the Avon. The children at the Peacock Fountain. The footsteps of your people going about their busy lives. Memorise these sounds, tuck them away for later. Because Ōtautahi my dear, it is all about to change. Oh Ōtautahi, I wish I could have warned you.
4 September 2020
Poetry by Claire Broughton (she/her)
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Crossword: Within Limits
ACROSS 1. Name bestowed upon Gandhi (7) 5. Upset; push to the ground (3,4) 9. The ‘Academy’ one is 1.371:1 (6,5) 10. Gift given to Waikiki tourists (3) 11. Assistant sometimes woken by hearing the name ‘Jerry’ (4) 12. Layout plans that used to be called ‘cyanotypes’ (10) 14. It might have an amoeba on it (10,5) 16. Mason, more commonly (10) 18. ‘Do’ or ‘go’, for example (4) 21. ___ chi (meditative art) (3) 22. Fanta and the like (6,5) 23. Poets who don’t work in free verse, probably (7) 24. Went off course (7)
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Puzzles
DOWN 1. Hobbits famously have seven every day (5) 2. The H in ADHD (13) 3. Food that is better when soft-shelled (4) 4. Word that can precede ‘paint’ or ‘nails’ (7) 5. ‘Within Limits’, for this crossword (5) 6. Further development (8) 7. Birth occasion for Simon Pegg and Danai Gurira (10,3) 8. Put out another copy of, as a book (7) 13. 2020 Swift album regarded as the first ‘great work’ of the pandemic (8) 14. Any main character of ‘The Godfather’ films (7) 15. Donates to a Kickstarter campaign (7) 17. Pile up (and a word that means ‘pile up’ if you take off the first letter) (5) 19. Founded (upon) (5) 20. One who might consult a manual (4)
Skuxduku: A bit harder than last week’s
Word of the Week
“book” Te Reo Māori pukapuka New Zealand Sign language
Last Weeks Crossword Answers Across 1. Wellington, 5. Pandemic, 8. Flatting, 10. The Wiggles, 13. VUWSA, 14. Oasis, 16. Subway, 18. Janhavi, 19. Pokémon, 21. Durex, 22. Vans Down 2. Gale, 3. Zig Zag, 4. The Edge, 6. Mittens, 7. Critc, 9. The Rock, 10. Thursday, 11. L.A.B, 12. Studylink, 15. STUDiO, 16. Star Wars, 17. Nitro, 20. NZSL
EVENTFINDA/DOOR. MOON PIZZA RULES
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D Aries
Taurus
Gemini
Your power is in being productive. Do your readings in advance, even if they test your patience. However, you’re struggling to cover all of your bases. This week is the best time to ask for help: it’s worth getting advice from your flatmates, emailing your tutor or Student Learning.
March is here, you’re busy and it’s affecting your confidence. Rest up and focus on your close friends! Buy yourself a pair of Red Band gumboots, it’s gonna be a academically muddy month. Do, however, ask your boss for a raise or apply for that out of reach job on Tuesday, it’s your lucky day.
You’re about to embark on some groundbreaking shifts in your life. But don’t worry, you’re prepared for these - you’ve changed your subway order once, you can change it again. Make sure to focus on what you want, the universe is working in your favour.
Cancer
Leo
Virgo
Your slump is ending, take a big breath! Change is coming and keeping active is the way to go. Reminder: don’t take out your residual feelings on people, and especially not your partner or bestfriend. Instead try a mediation app with a free trial, just remember to cancel before they charge you $$.
You’re feeling frustrated, uni is kind of ceebs already, flat/hall dinners aren’t living up to expectations. However, the planets are aligning positively for your relationships. This is a time for the real ones, so get some Creme Eggs and hang with your best friend, partner, or even that random you’ve been seeing.
Beyonce’s a Virgo, you’re a Virgo and Mars is giving you energy like you’re performing the entire Formation world tour. Honestly, utilise that boost. This week that confidence is seeping into your love life - just don’t get in your head and make assumptions, they like you back (promise).
Libra
Scorpio
Sagittarius
Any plans you’ve made are likely to go out the window so you best get ready. Your friends are being flakey, it’s time to crash your flatmates or lecture friends next hang - but, ask first. Or, Mercury is helping you with productivity this week, so maybe focus on uni if your new social endeavours flop.
A win is coming for you, just not this week :/. Avoid any dates, or starting that ‘super cool new project’, it might not work out the way you want. You’re only in tune with yourself this week so focus on you! Go get yourself some takeaway pizza for dinner, you deserve it.
You’re killing it, you’re the Emperor and you’ve got hold of a new groove! Your life is becoming full with influential people, so go make connections! Just don’t let this blind you, remember to be careful with money and make sure you’re still present with your loved ones.
Capricorn
Aquarius
Pisces
Your sign is literally a Goat and this week you’re the G.O.A.T. You’ll sort any possible stress, it’ll be smooth sailing, like America’s Cup. Watch what you say though. Triple check the recipient before you hit send, and don’t slide into their DMs - your pickup line sounded 100x better in your head.
Remember summer? Neither. Life is crazy, the planets are up to some weird shit. But guess what, they’re on your side, you’re on the right track. The universe wants you to take risks, so switch it up, try oatmilk instead of soy, you might just find the answers.
You’re about to bust out of your chrysalis and go into full butterfly effect (no Travis Scott). You’re in your prime this birthday month, yay! You’re feeling extra spiritual, so go buy yourself a $3 crystal and manifest. The universe is on your side, it just wants to know what you want.
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Horoscopes
The Team Editors
Feature Writers
Design & Illustration
Contributors
Sally Ward & Matthew Casey editor@salient.org.nz
Padraig Simpson designer@salient.org.nz
Sub Editor Jamie Clarke
News Editor
Johnny O’Hagan Brebner R. Whaitiri
Maddi Rowe Liam Powell Frankie Dale Nakisa Wilson Oli Cheyne Madison Walker Francesa Georgia Pietkiewicz Nutsford
Kane Bassett news@salient.org.nz
Chief Reporter Niva Chittock
Staff Writers Janhavi Gosavi Ronia Ibrahim Lachlan Ewing
Find Us
fb.com/salientmagazine IG @salientgram Twitter @salientmagazine www.salient.org.nz
Social Media & Web Manager Thomas Gerbremichael
Podcast Manager
Francesa Georgia Pietkiewicz Nutsford
Centerfold Nick Wilkey @nicka.wilkey
Cover Photography Brittany Harrison @shuttabutter
Padraig is this year’s Salient designer. He is responsible for laying out all the content and making things look nice and enjoys bringing the writing to life. You can see his other work on IG @padraigsimpson.
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