ق�ص�ص م�صورة من هنا وهناك
picture stories from here and there
1
18+
contents
Editorial : So, What Is A Samandal?............................................. 3 THE FDZ Khkhkh................................................................................................... 7 HATEM IMAM Suspended Time, Number 1: The Family Tree........................14 MAZEN KERBAJ Glitterpill...................................................................................... 36 ELYSE TABET the Educator................................................................................ 38 FOUAD R MEZHER Salon Tarek el Khurafi............................................................... 65 OMAR KHOURI Yoghurt & Jam............................................................................ 93 LENA MERHEJ Happy Birthday to Me........................................................ 104 FARAH NEHME Dans le Taxi............................................................................109 BARRACK RIMA Nicoptine................................................................................ 129 ISABELLE BOINOT The Vacant Lot....................................................................... 147 ANDY WARNER
Khkhkh
Hatem Imam Read in this direction
vroom
Whoosh...
Toot
Wrrr...wrrr...
Fshhhhh…..
foooo…
Whoosh..
Tick...
squeeeaaaak….
Dub…
Tub…
Wrrrr….
Fffffffffffff….
Click..
Tub..
Dub...
voommm…
Ffff…
whooosh….
Khsh….
Ooof…
Ffffff…
squeaaak….
(right to left) squeaaaaak...vrrr...brrr...shffff...tick..wrrr...beep...dub...hmmm….
Ffffffffffff….
(Top to bottom) Beep! Ffffff…..nnnnnn….streeeeechhhh...pull….zzzzzz…..hhh...tick...fluff..dub….wheee...mmmm… sssss...brrbrrbrrr
The end
Suspended Time, Number 1: The Family Tree by Mazen Kerbaj
Read in this direction
People and Places
The Hanin Family Association
People and Places
The Hanin Family Association
Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to
Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to
elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each
elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each
of the new members
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People
The Hanin Family Association
of the new members
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People and Places
The Hanin Family Association
Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to
Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to
elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each
elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each
of the new members
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People
The Hanin Family Association Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People
The Hanin Family Association Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
of the new members
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People
The Hanin Family Association Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People
The Hanin Family Association Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed with a newborn boy - their first
People Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
People? van Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed with a newborn boy - their first
Who CARES ABOUT
People?
People Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first
People? Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
WHO CARES ABOUT
People? Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
The first generation Antoine Kerbaj
The first generation
OR
Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
The first generation Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
The first generation Antoine Kerbaj
Antoine Kerbaj
The first generation
the father Antoine Kerbaj
The first generation
OR Antoine Kerbaj
The first generation
the father Antoine Kerbaj
The first generation
the father Antoine Kerbaj
and then
1975
BEGINNING OF THE WAr in lebanon
1975
the WAr
1975
BEGINNING OF THE WAr in lebanon
1975
the WAr
1975
1975
the WAr
1975
the WAr
1975
the WAr
1975
the WAr
1975
The second generation
the WAr
1975
the WAr
1975
the WAr
1975
the WAr
the WAr
1975
1975
And Also A Birth
And Also
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
the WAr 1975
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
WHY WAr?
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
the WAr?
The second generation
WHY is this joint going out?
The second generation
the joint’s gone out
The second generation
The second generation
why?
The second generation
the joint’s going out
The second generation
the joint’s gone out
The second generation
The second generation
The second generation
People
The second generation
People
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb
The second generation Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
The second generation
People Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
Mazen Kerbaj
The second generation
THE SON Mazen Kerbaj
Mazen Kerbaj
Mazen Kerbaj
THE adventures of Mazen Kerbaj
IN Beirut
Beirut
and mini market abu koko
Beirut
and
AT SUNSET mini market abu koko
Beirut and
AT SUNSET so
Beirut
Beirut
and
AT SUNSET mini market abu koko
Beirut and
AT SUNSET mini market abu koko
Beirut
and
and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then
so, then
in
Beirut and
Beirut and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then in
so, then in
and
and
Beirut
Beirut
and
and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then in
so, then in
and
and
and
and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then in
so, then in
and
and
and
and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then in
so, then in
and
and
and
and
AT SUNSET
AT SUNSET
so, then in
so, then in
and
and
in
and
The Third generation
and
and
then in
and
The Third generation
and in
and
The Third generation
The Third generation
The Third generation
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
I draw better than you do
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
AND AFTER THAT
The Third generation
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
The Third generation
Evan Kerbaj
AND then
AND then
the father and the son and the son’s son
AND then the father and the son and the son’s son we come to THE END
AND then the father and the son and the son’s son we come to
AND after
THE END?
AND after
THE END?
after
THE END
AND after
THE END?
AND after
THE END?
AND after
THE END?
after
after
THE END
THE END
we return to
after
after
THE END
THE END
we return to
we return to
the beginning and after THE END?
and after THE END?
and after THE END?
after THE END
and after? THE END
and after? THE END
The Third generation
and THEN
THE SON’s Son Evan Kerbaj
THE adventures of Mazen Kerbaj
IN Beirut
the WAr
and
AT SUNSET so, then in
and
The SECONd generation
THE SON MAZEN Kerbaj
1975
People and Places
The Hanin Family Association Held a meeting on 16/12/2000 at the St. Georges Cathedral in Hadath in order to elect new board members. After the election, positions were assigned to each of the new members
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed
with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
The FIRST generation
THE FATHER ANTOINE Kerbaj
The beginning People and Places Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Mr. Mazen Antoine Kerbaj and his wife Mrs. Diana (formerly Ayyoub) were blessed with a newborn boy - their first - named Evan Antoine (Trad Hospital)
Tasha Roger Ghoreyyeb
Roger Ghoreyyeb and his wife Katia (formerly Haddad) are pleased to announce the birth of their first daughter, named Tasha, born 3/2/2001 (St. Georges Hospital, Beirut)
In
The beginning
The beginning Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
Tasha Rog Ghoreyyeb
Ghoreyyeb
In
In
And
And
The beginning Before
Each
Of
The father
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Ghoreyyeb
The beginning Before Each
Of
Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Ghoreyyeb
In
In
And
And
The beginning Before
Each
Of
The father And
The son AND THE SON’S SON Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Ghoreyyeb
The beginning Before Each
Of
The father
And
The son Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Ghoreyyeb
The beginning Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj
AND THE SILVER SCREEN GODDESS LAURE Ghoreyyeb Of
In
The beginning Before Each Of The father And The son And The son’S SON And
Was
the artist the woman the mother Evan Antoine Mazen Kerbaj Ghoreyyeb
The beginning
LAURE Ghoreyyeb Of
The beginning
LAURE Ghoreyyeb Of
The beginning
LAURE Ghoreyyeb Of
TOOOT
LAURE Ghoreyyeb Of
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
TOOOT
And no matter how much we try to push it away‌
THE END
by elyse tabet
Salon Tareq el Khurafi BY OMAR KHOURY
Read in this direction
* Tarek el Khurafi’s Barbershop *
Thanks for the cut, man. See ya.
Take care of yourself, Asad.
sorry
Bye.
Are you Mr.
I am indeed. How may I help you?
* Ish
Tarek elKhurafi?
*
STOP. IDENTIFICATION PLEASE.
*
*
AND THE CONTENTS OF YOUR POCKETS.
WE HAVE RECEIVED WORD THAT YOU ARE IN THE BUSINESS OF MANUFACTURING AND DISTRIBUTING IMAGINARY ARTI– FACTS TO THE PUBLIC FROM THIS LOCATION.
Mental Security Forces: Investigation Bureau
SEARCH THE PREMISES!
SIR, ALL HE HAS IS 7,000 LIRA
AND A PACK OF CEDARS CIGARETTEs
Certainly, we all agree
AS WE ALL AGREE THAT SUCH THINGS DO NOT EXIST AND HAVE NO PLACE IN REALITY…
Examine it Yes sir
Click
As I was saying, as these things do not in fact exist, there can also be no law which exists to prohibit them. And yet if these allegations directed against you turn out to be true, we can conclude two things:
Click
Teet
t
Tee
Tik
Click
Clack!
Clack!
Shick
Firstly, that you are earning your wages through the deception of your customers, by selling items under false pretenses.
Shick!
Shick
Clack
k
ic
Cl
Click
Cl
k
Click
Click
ick
Clic
Pul
k
l
lic
k
ic
Cl
Clic
k
ll
Pu
Ish
t!
Tee
And secondly, that you are aiding in the corruption of the citizenry through the encouragement of escapist, individualistic thought, which distracts the populace from their duties to society.
May I remind you, Mr. Khurafi‌ Very well. Take a sample for closer inspection in the lab, take note of his particulars and let him go.
I can assure you, my boy,
That you may also be burdening your innocent customers with unnecessary trouble.
‌ that this is just a rumor started by the other barbers in the area to steal my customers
We will take our leave then
Nothing here
Nothing in this room
And nothing in the storage area outside
Sir, these seem like regular cigarettes
All shaving equipment
We hope for your sake that you have given us the truth, for we guarantee we will find out if you have been lying.
* * Ish Sh
clac
k!
Hmm?
You’re mine!
Double 3.
DO Excuse me. Can you help me out for a second?
M
* **
*
is Our Face * The Nation * * Public parking
*
Face is a blessing from the gods‌ * The Religious Freedom Party
*
*
malek
*
Malek
z
p zi z
Zz
zz
zz
z z
*
Malek
Stack!
Stack!
Knock knock
DO
M
knock
Just a second!
Lulwa?
i
Zii
Can we talk?
Are you busy?
iii
iiii
iii iiii
clack tshak
What are you doing here?
Hi
Um…
Ok. Sure. Come in.
You can put your stuff down there, behind the desk.
Through the right there, first door on your left.
Clack
Where’s the bathroom?
Flushshsh You wanna drink anything? Apple juice? 7-up? I can make coffee…
click
No, wait. I brought you something that might help a little more.
You remember the first time we got drunk? When Abu Raymond found us between his barrels of Arak, totally wasted… Here’s to Abu Raymond.
He couldn’t believe that you of all people would do such a thing
Tink
Listen, Sura, I‌ But I still consider you my closest friend.
I know we didn’t leave off on the best of terms
I need to find a place to live. I’ve got money, I just don’t know this city too well. I don’t know anyone here but you.
If you can recommend a good, clean hotel that’s not too expensive
Just until I find an apartment or a room somewhere.
So: what happened?
Did you guys have a fight?
Lulwa, you’ve got a suitcase and not much else. I know your parents, they’d never send you off on your own without any help.
It was almost three years ago…
We were on our way to school.
It was raining really hard
What do you mean?
My parents…
Can I at least ask what happened first?
I got wedged between the two seats.
My parents‌
I didn’t really get what happened until after the funeral.
Broke three ribs and a collarbone.
ziiiii
to be continued
Read in this direction
Vienna 1920
Dhour Choueir 1982
Jam and Yogurt
(or how my mom became Lebanese)
One day in July‌
I heard a loud explosion
COME INSIDE!!!
Vienna 1943
BOOM BOOM
Berlin 1956 My mom rushed us down the stairs, counting us along the way: one, two, three, four, five.
Are they going to kill us ????!!!!
...
Beirut 1982
Karlvary 1920
Stop crying, it’s pointless!
We stayed on the stairs for 8 hours
I have to go get milk
Every Friday, I go to my mom’s and sit with her.
I’m going up!
Takes her glasses off
She puts her papers aside
As usual, whether I’ve eaten or not, Noura brings me a plate of rice and curry
Thank you!
What did you eat?
And asks me:
She was very angry
But when I ask her about her past, she...
Then complains
Why the interrogation?
Then smiles and talks
Then complains
Smiles and talks
What did you do today?
My mom settles herself in on the couch
And says
Why the interrogation?
And then smiles and talks... I’m unhappy that you don’t want to call your cousin’s grandfather’s cousin!
If I say “the usual”, all hell breaks loose…
YOU HAVE TO CALL
It would be nice if you called the son of your uncle’s grandfather’s niece!
YOUR GRANDFATHER’S COUSIN’S NEPHEW’S UNCLE!
If I ask her how she is, she tells me a rambling story with no beginning and no end
...
...
...
Vienna 1961
Berlin, 1960
She went to medical school in Vienna and worked as a nurse at the Wilhencinenspital Hospital
It was love at first sight
She was alone her dog
And her walks
She forgot the sweets
And she learnt Arabic for Ali
Say: oh cream! Oh honey! I can’t live without you She rejected quite a few suitors…
How do I say Ish liebe dish in Arabic?
Her teacher was Egyptian…
Then Ali told her he had to marry an Oriental woman
And kept thinking about the man who had filled
her heart with warmth…
Stephansplatz 1958
Mariahilfer Strasse 1962
Our house overlooks the Military Club
Mulla Street 1970
Dinnawi Street 1979
Ma’arad Street 1989
Mar Elias Street 1994
*
Jounieh 1982 * Sinno
*
* Taxi
Ardati Street 1973
In 1982, it overlooked the Israel battleships in Jounieh bay
And to swim on the bathroom floor
Ardati Street 1996 I learnt to cut things
with my sister Yasmine
In this house, I learnt to count
Harf al-Dayr
She showed us where it was - and we saw it for the first time - in 1992, since the road had been blocked before that.
At the time, he was supposed to marry his older and younger brothers’ wives’ sister
She came to Lebanon in 1967, and worked as a pediatrician at the German hospital facing the St. George hotel
I’ve often tried to ask her more about that period
And every time, she replies:
She met her first husband through mutual friends
How could you have forgotten the cardboard box you slept in?
But all I remember is a wooden bed In this way, she entered the Arabist intellectual society
One day, my mom came back from the hospital, and we had to be quiet, because the babies in her tummy were dead.
and a dream I woke up from screaming:
Give me a stream of water!
And chose Beirut as the place to live out her dreams.
Since that day in summer 1982, we haven’t heard of Karim and Karma
She had three beautiful children, and died of cancer in 1981.
Who died from a tooth infection due to a lack of antibiotics, according to my mom
Her wedding dress, which is now in one of a pile of bags in the attic, was purple
She named me after my grandmother, her mom. and works at the public library.
Particularly after my sister Mona’s twin died
She met her friend through her husband. She was a beautiful woman
Her daughter got married at a church near the museum in 1992.
I remember that she always wore purple
And the boys are in France
She always turned her grief into anger that (which) drove her to work
My mom loved her so much that she named her daughter after her.
Come on Mona!
But today she has an eye disease that keeps her from working
We crossed over to the East to visit them many times, when the roads were blocked. I’ll shell some seeds for you!
In 1974, her husband passed away, so she started a daycare center for her three children.
This daycare center was one of the first in Musseitbeh
So, her acquaintances grew‌
I sometimes go with her to the clinic at the American University Hospital Good morning
Good morning
hello doctor! how are you?
hi doctor
Marie Rose Boulos and her son Paul Salwa Merhej and her grand-daughter, Mireille *
The nurses and doctors all say hello, and sometimes the patients do too How are the kids? Have they started school?
How are the kids? Have they started school?
And her second husband, my dad.
* Jumblatt, Karami, Berri, Gemayel
After that, we walk home down Hamra street, and I ask her questions‌
As a teenager, she chopped her hair off
When she was a bit older, she wrapped them around her head
As a girl, she had pigtails
I’ve seriously tried to understand what my father means when he says:
I should always remind myself that I didn’t marry an Oriental woman
And as the kidnapping of foreigners increased, she dyed it brown
In the eighties, she grew it down past her shoulders
It’s 7:30, do you want anything? I’m going
When she came to Lebanon, it was really short
I tried to separate the Oriental and the Western in her by comparing her to “Oriental” mothers And she works a lot
She gets angry in a flash
She invents inedible meals
My mother sometimes uses a strange language when she talks on the phone
Which brought out the color and shine of her eyes
After that, I thought hard about how to get rid of the “foreign” features of my face
highlights
french manicure
Lenses
High-heeled boots
I never understood what he means by Oriental woman
Till now, I haven’t discovered the exact elements of the Lebanese look Social chitchat and gossip? Obedience?
Dancing?
Coffee and cigarettes?
Black eyes? Painted toenails?
...Later, she told me the story of how she had resolved this East-West problem, and that it had endangered her life.
I think she went through something similar, and she tried all the hairdos Lebanese women wore.
My mother stayed in our home on the Corniche
And Reem: Watches Lena and Mona
Mona: Feeds Tommy
Yasmine: Prepares food *
Lena: Throws out the trash
Omar: Hangs laundry out to dry
*cake or donuts every day, crepes or burgers or spaghetti with pine-nuts and yogurt once a week
And learnt how to cook and other traditions from her mother-in-law, who stayed and helped her. And planted geraniums and hortensias on the balcony
She decorated her home with glass fish
*
Meanwhile, my dad would be thinking
My mom would be at the clinic at 7:30 every morning
* Gemayel, Karami, Jumblatt, Berri
*
Now, at 7:30 a.m., she sits in her armchair and calls us, one after the other. * Geagea, Berri, Aoun, Jumblatt
She ran the house like a tight ship whose engine was: us
Hello...Good morning! Did I wake you up?!
First, she calls Tony, my brother-in-law Toot...tooot…
Hello L..Mon...O...Yas...Reem! Yasmine! Yeah, hi mom. How are you? Toot….tooot…
Are you still at home? Why don’t you just shut the school down? What’s the use? It’s alright, I’m up now. How are you? Toot...toot… Hello...Lena...How are you? Are you still asleep? Ooh, sorry sorry...we’ve missed you…
Hi mom, what’s up? I saw you yesterday! Toot...toot…
Yeah..Hi...What are you doing? I’m tired, wiped out and overworked...come over for a visit… Toot...toot… Mom...it’s still early Do I have to remind you every day that there’s an hour time difference? (To be continued)
Hi Mona. How are you...what? Did you go to university today?
by Farah Nehme
I’VE OFTEN HEARD OF THE “FIRST KISS”, WHICH I’VE NEVER HAD
PEOPLE INSIST UPON THE EVENT’S ORIGINALITY…
...AND THAT IT LEAVES A STEAMY MEMORY AND INDELIBLE MARK ON THE LIPS…
The big day
Propelled by my steroid hormones
And guided by common sense
I wanted to make an amorous conquest on the eve of my 20th birthday
Like all those vamps
Towards that end, I had been through my list of old flames
In order to stave off any possible failure
This night has to be lucky
Or I’ll force it to become lucky
We had cigarettes
Cheese sticks
And beer
The fourth bottle successfully put my conscience to sleep
Two days after that famous night
I don’t know if I stole it or if it was a kiss based on mutual accord and shared desire All that remains is the tentative euphoria of an uncertain glory...if not a missed opportunity.
In the Taxi
, by Barrak Rima
I read somewhere that we were the city’s memory...
tweet
This is just a claim, of course...
tweet
Mmm…
where’s the road
to Tripoli
tweet
Good. Let’s be clear:
All we do is wander the streets pushing these carriages of books around...
Mmm…
Hello. I need forks, plates and coffee cups.
One minute. He’s checking his anthropology book.
Easy.
Easy.
Mmm…
Knives and spoons too...
Mmm…
Right. It’s a fact that to be loaded with books is to be loaded with memory...
You’ll find those at a peddler’s in Tripoli...
Mmm…
However.. Hey!
What a relief!
Take a look in the Medicine book.
What year did Sultan Qalaoun order the city to be razed?
A long time ago.
Aaaah! Interesting!
Easy...
As I was saying…
I SELL FORKS!
I SELL PLATES!
I SELL KNIVES AND SPOONS!
I SELL CUUUUPSS OOOOOOOF...
Coffee!
I have a question
There’s a customer waiting for you at the end of Mina street in Tripoli
Ah.. interesting What a relief! Ouf!
Do you know how to cure a poet-cyclist who teaches pre-Islamic Arabic poetry and occasionally drives a cab of indifference? Too easy... INCURABLE!
Shit! The poor man!
Sell!
I sell!
I SELL! I SELL CUUUUPS OF COFFEE!
Shit!
It’s time for a break.
Ouf!
The claim as I was saying is that we are the city’s itinerant memory.
Mmm…
Here for example, this book confirms my theory by which... Excuse...Our break will soon be over.
Ah, yes...
I was saying…
I had a dream..
The city had stopped growing. No. It had grown younger.
My mother had been cured of her incurable illness. She too had grown younger.
And...
What a weird dream!
And my grandfather was fixing a portrait I had made of him.
Mmm…
We learn something new every day, right?
Mmm…
So, as I was saying..
Look here!
I don’t know what to ask today… There’s everything: Anthropology, sociology, art history, politics, mathematics, cinema, comics…
How do we say boiled in French?
Easy, easy!
What are comics?
Truly Mmm… simple!
“cuit” “cuit”
Look it up in the cooking book...
A pleasurable activity that can nevertheless give those who practice it an incurable sense of guilt…
THAT’S IT! I HAVE A QUESTION!
In my dream, I too had gotten younger.
Really?
And I was trying to find the road back to Mina, in Tripoli.
(cui)
What a truly bizarre dream! Look it up in the Study of the Wandering Researcher...
This story has no end.
Cui cui It’s weird, I can’t find a thing about it.. Mmm…
Abu Nouhad..
I’m going to draw your portrait!
This isn’t Abu Nouhad
This is Abou Nouhad
With only three strokes, Abu Nouhad had managed to make his portrait look like him.
Since then, Abu Nouhad went away and his portrait was lost.
Downtown, near the Ottoman clock. Take the sea route, please.
* * TAXI where are we going?
After Beirut, Beirut and the memory of Beirut, I decided to return to Mina, Tripoli.
Character
I was born here, in the backseat of a group taxicab on the sea road.
Driver
I have to make up my mind (fast) (but) all the same, choose my words and my direction carefully...
There was already some tension brewing among the passengers before they got to Mina, where the driver asked:
since the passengers had already fought over the music
What route should I take, the sea road or the land one?
Narrator:
They had hardly left downtown (near the Ottoman clock),
Land!
Sea!
Sea!
Land!
when:
Someone asked:
Drrrrrivvvverrrr don’t you have any musiiiiiiic?
The driver hardly had time to answer before.
Donnnn’t yoooou?
Yes! tunes!
Inta Omri by Um Kulthoum ...
or Chantal Goya..
Are you nuts? I’d prefer some Farid elAtrache
Do
That seems atrocious.
Abdel Wahab No! Asmahan
Charles Aznavour Boney M Bob
Abba
Amr fifi Diab Abdo
Sabah Not him!
Euh
Please don’t play Tchaikovsky
?
Claude Francois
Sisi
Madona Shakira
Najwa Karam Assi Hellani Wadih Safi
Haifa Wahbi Jean Jacques Goldmann
Fairouz
Elvis Tina Turner
Julio Iglesias
Michael Jackson
Abdel Halim Hafez
Souma
Ya leyli ya ein
*
Demis Roussos
Edith Piaff
* singing
* Nawal Al Zoghbi
* dancing Tripoli
Kazem El Saher Fares Karam
Nancy Ajram
Diana Haddad
Elissa Melhem Barrakat
Amal Hijazi
Katia Harb
Nelly Makdissi
Walid Toufic
Ragheb Alama
Alaa Zalzali
Foulla
Issam Rajji
Euh.. Shirine
Georges Wassouf
Wael Kfouri
Samira Toufic
Carole Semaha
Jo Achkar
Maya Nasri Suzanne Tammim
Samira Said ka...
ka...ka.. Diana Karazone
Wael Tassar Rouwaida Atieh
Kazem Al-Saher!
Jimi Hendrix
All these people are in the same taxicab?
This surplus of musical demands among the taxi passengers could have set off a disaster Had the driver not found an intelligent compromise.
LÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PARO
PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ ET ENCORE DES PAROLÉ
OUWA OUWAAAAA-AHA
box But a compromise is only a compromise and the tension in the taxi had been well-established . To these PAROLES, the car arrived at the entrance of Mina street
The narrator returns
Sea?
Road? Sea? Road?
Sea?
Sooooooo? Road?
Driiiiiiiiiiiivvvvvverrrrrr?
….
Road?
Or?
Sea?
The driver decided to take the sea route.
Despite his careful choice of words, the driver couldn’t stop a new argument breaking out.
I was born here, in the backseat of a group taxicab on the sea
road!
A few months later, a terrible war broke out in Lebanon.
* * newspaper cut-outs
This one was even more violent.
I was born at that very moment,
Meanwhile, in a taxi…
Ratibée (to Salwa):
Listen my girl, each State has its conditions (She repeats, weighing her words) each State has its conditions
Ratibée (to Salwa): For example. The European Union - Schengen - sates have their conditions: to get political asylum, you have to prove that you’re a victim of political persecution in your country and that your life is in danger because of your political or religious beliefs...or things like this….
Salwa (to Ratibée): Really?
Ratibée (to Salwa):
And Belgium
But of course there are differences among the Schengen states, even
Ratibée (to Nassim):
Ratibée (to Salwa):
Salwa:
Exactly
But these states are
Fffff
trying to unify their laws on refugees
Nassim (to Ratibée): To this end, they organized a major conference in Barcelona
Nassim (to Ratibée): Europe is barricading itself into an inaccessible fortress, rich but surrounded by a poor and under-developed world
Ratibée (to Nassim): Yes...They’re protecting themselves from third-world immigration
Nassim (to Ratibée):
And from the Eastern European countries
I was born in a taxicab.
And where you choose the start, the destination and the route.
Not the kind where you pay for all five seats...
No. I was born in a ‘service’, or group taxi.
And at the very moment of my birth, the passenger sitting in the back center seat
made the following proclamation:
To which the In a taxicab, a passenger person is at the on his right cinema. enthusiastically responded:
And the others chimed in:
We have a frame,
The passenger on the left:
We have what is outside the frame,
The length,
The image and the sound.
I would be more inclined to say that we were at the theater.
Mmm
At the theater?
At the theater?
At the theater?
At the theater?
At the theater?
At the theater?
At the theater!
AT THE THEA TER At the theater! Attention: we’re at the THEATER!
At the theater!
Yeah?
At the theater!
At the theater! At the theater!
Ah Ah Mmh
At the theater!!
At the theater! Ah
At the theater!
Aaah!
At the theater!
And comics? And the cinema? And the taxicab?
And this is the public’s reaction:
What is this story that has no beginning and no end?!
I don’t like Theater!
Ha
This story just drags on…
Ffff...
Ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haha ha haha ha ha ha
I lost the narrative...
PAROLÉ PAROLÉ PAROLÉ
I’m afraid of boredom
So?
Road? Sea? Haha
Driver?
Z.. Z.
In truth..
This story is neither aesthetic
nor narrative!
What happens next? What happens next?
...
Lets get back to the story...otherwise it’ll go all over the place
We are We are in a comic. not at the theater.
Nor at the cinema.
Not even in a taxicab.
But the setting is a taxicab
Go on, narrator.
Well said!
It’s unbelievable that we haven’t been able to find anything about that dream!
I was saying: at the very moment I was born, the driver made the following proclamation:
I had a weird dream. I had become young again, but could not find the roads of my youth...
It’s tough! Really tough!
I’m lost!
Meanwhile, in a taxi,
Cui Cui Cui
Cui
The next time, I promise I’ll take off my glasses. End
Applause
nicoptine isabelle boinot
starring, among others Pete
Jess
Frank
Anita It’s summer in Capulco
Pete works at a grocer’s. He’s replacing
Marc, his girlfriend Jess’ dad, who’s on
vacation. Jess is on vacation, preparing for
her degree in the 1000 meter crawl. Her friend Anita is starting a police career, alongside her colleague Frank.
Dan would like a share in Pete and Jess’ (who he is madly in love with) intimate life.
Pete and Dan arrive at the pool Do you think
she’d go for it?
Listen Dan, I’ll take care of
everything - you just stand aside
She has to understand that the both of us
will fully satisfy her
And for that, you
If she refuses, I
must seduce her
still have those
pictures of her
Seduce her….
Meanwhile, at the police station
and Anita, naked
Frank, don’t forget that I’m waiting for Patrice Morillon’s bodyguard
I think I may
threaten to post them online
And I am waiting to caress your body uninhibited, Anita
You are a sex
maniac Frank, watch out‌
You wouldn’t want me to file a sexual harassment claim against you, would you? Because I could do it!
Oh, Captain!
Without fail, Jess is exactly where they expected her to be. Pete and Dan are going to be able to put their little plan into action
Excellent!
Yay! Great!
Darling, do you remember Dan?
Hi Jess Oh wow, she’s beautiful, she’s beautiful, she’s beautiful
You know, he’d
really like to
Hello you
Yeah, he broke my rib the last time we met
get to know you
better. We could have some good times, all three of us, if you catch my drift
You know Jess, it may be better for you to agree to this, because you know that I still have those
compromising pictures that you
wouldn’t like me to spread about
Are you blackmailing me?
It’s not blackmail, I just think that you should open yourself up to new experiences, and that you have the potential for this
The potential?
Oh come on, Jess, it was only a joke!
Don’t be ridiculous, your
so?
proposition disgusts me!
To hell with you both!
so?
I thought it went well - I stayed out of it
Hold on, we’ll try again
She finds me silly, right?
Dan, relax
Maybe Anita put ideas into her head Such as the fact that I have a tiny penis
The next day
..given all you’ve told me already
Of course, Anita, what did you think?
so you refused?
It’s absolutely disgusting!
Tell me the truth
Jess: if you didn’t know about Dan’s problem
Over at Jess’ parents’:
It’s noon, Marc
Right? You would have accepted
I work 11 months a year at the
Why...why are you using this tone Wendy? I’ll remind you that I’m on vacation! That doesn’t explain why you had to come home at 4 a.m
You’re changing the
subject rather well, Marc
grocery - I’d also like to remind you that without my salary you
wouldn’t be able to parade about in your mohair sweaters
If you’re trying to poison
Wendy, what are you
me with fuel, it would be
insinuating? And what
absolutely ridiculous
did you put in my coffee?
At the grocer’s, Anita visits Pete Hi Pete
Hi Anita
I was with Jess a moment ago, she
told me everything
You’re saying that, but I know that you were up for a threesome too
You know, it was Dan’s idea
Especially since you used to date guys in college -- Dan told me that
Don’t worry, Jess doesn’t know about it. But tell me, do the
pictures you want to show the world turn you on?
I’d like to remind you that
I’m a cop, and if I were you, I’d find other things to amuse myself with
Anyway, I gave
the photos to Dan
so make sure to get them back as fast as
possible, and apologize to Jess before I tell her about your past
That one’s really bossy
No later than that evening, Pete invites Jess to dinner
Are you mad at me?
Oh Jess
I don’t know
humf
How to put it? I think I really go for you, Jess
The next day
At the station, Frank and Anita are training:
The exercise
does me good!
I think we can safely
say that I beat you hands down, Frank!
You know what else does you good..
I’m not interested Frank. I’ve
already told you, we’re just
colleagues, no more, no less.
And I have
something really special for you
You know that I
totally want you
Meanwhile, at the grocery…
I’m gonna kill you, you bastard
to be continued
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except “Tarek el Khurafi” by Lina Mounzer
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Taha Taha
Fouad R. Mezher
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Published by:
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