San Diego Woman Magazine Summer 2014

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Woman San Diego

Informing, Entertaining, and Featuring the Women of San Diego

www.sandiegowoman.com

Sandy Jackman

Bringing Bali to La Jolla

The Golden Ratio Salvador Dali


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Woman San Diego

Dear Readers,

Welcome to the summer issue of San Diego Woman. This is San Diego Woman's seventh summer of fun in beautiful San Diego. Although, with beautiful weather practically every day of the year, San Diegans are not limited to two months a year to visit beaches, hotels, or to scuba dive, hike or camp. We are often restricted by school schedules and time off from jobs though, like the rest of the country. Travel has become quite difficult of late, with airlines cutting back on what used to be included necessities, like allowing for passengers to bring baggage, have meals and even a place to put their legs. Pretty soon all airline passengers will be sitting with their legs underneath them while they travel across the country or for that matter the world. The next thing I'm waiting to hear is that we will need to pay to use the bathroom. To avoid the airline nightmares you can now go to Bali, without leaving San Diego, thanks to our cover girl, Sandy Jackman, her husband Larry and her family. Who have spent close to four years renovating a deserted waterside property into an object of pure beauty. Once you walk through the doors of The Pantai Inn you are transformed out of San Diego and into the tropically splendor or Bali. Take some time to read about all they did to replicate a place so far from home yet close to there hearts. Who has not heard of Salvador Dali? We were thrilled to be offered an exclusive interview with one of the last living connections to famed art icon Salvador Dali. Madame Christine Argillet is the daughter of Pierre Argillet, the publisher and long time friend of Dali. She shared some precious photos and stories about the mysterious Dali.

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If you are brave and considering traveling out of the area, read some of our stories on Peru, New York, and one of the latest crazes in camping, glampimg (luxurious camping) Thank you again for being a loyal reader of San Diego Woman Magazine. Sincerely,

Judith A. Habert Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Subscription Information

Annual subscriptions available on request Please send name, mailing address, and check for $25.00 payable to San Diego Woman. Subscriptions can also be purchased online at www.sandiegowoman.com

San Diego Woman 11835 Carmel Mountain Road Suite 1304-346 San Diego, CA 92128 888 275 7125 858 735 5301

Disclaimer: Products, services, practices, websites or informational packets mentioned within our pages are in no way an endorsement by San Diego Woman, but are provided to our readers for informational purposes only. Privacy Advisory: Personal information provided by our readers will be used solely for the purposes of providing requested information and will not be shared.

Photographer: Lisa K Miller Model: Model: Sandy Jackman

Graphics/Magazine Layout: Sonali Soni www.sonalidesignstudio.com


Issue 2014

Inside Every Issue Letter from the Editor …………………………………………………... Letters to the Editor …………………………………………………… Poetry Corner...............................................………………………… He Said, She Said........................…………………………………….. Transitions with Carol LeBeau……………………………………….. Women in Business Directory………………………………………… Bitchin' & Moaning............................................................................ Ask An Angel……………………………………………………………..

Page 4 Page 8 Page25 Page 29 Page 30 Page 31 Page 37 Page 40

San Diego

Sandy Jackman Brings Bali to San Diego…………………………………………………………………………..…..Page 11 The Golden Ratio Salvador Dali ……………………………………………………………………………………..….Page 13 Tales of the Original Soccer Mom………………………………………………………………………………………...Page 17 Fire and Nice………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… Page 18 USO Stars & Stripes Ball ………………………………………………………………………………………………… .Page 20 Why Yogis End Up On Mountain Tops…………………………………………………………………………………...Page 21 Who Rules the Home?............................................................................................................................................Page 22 Glamping…The New Camping…………………………………………………………………………………….………Page 23 Oatmeal Cookies………………………………………………………………………………………………….…………Page 24 Lights of LightBridge ……………………………………………………………………………………………………....Page 26 Dreams Do Come True ……………………………………………………………………………………………………..Page 27 Expert Advice on Avoiding Skin Cancer…………………………………………………………………………………Page 28 Notes to Our Sons & Daughters ……………………………………………………………………………..………….. Page 30 Are You Looking to be Creatively Inspired? ........................................................................................................Page 36 You Can Go Home Again……………………………………………………………………………………………..…….Page 38 Women and Self Defense ……………………………………………………………………………………..……………Page 41 Beauty and Wellness Advice………………………………………………………………………….……………………Page 42 Unending Benefits…………………………………………………………………………………….……………………..Page 44 Lux Art Institute.......................................................................................................................................................Page 45 A New York Talent ………………………………………………………………………………………….……………….Page 47 Women Role Models ………………………………………………………………………………………….…………….Page 48 Lines in the Sand ………………………………………………………………………………………………….……......Page 49 A Peruvian Amazon Adventure …………………………………………………………………………….……………. Page 50

Woman

Inside This Issue

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Behind the Pages

Woman

Publisher/Editor-in-Chief editor@sandiegowoman.com

6 Sonali Soni

Creative Director

creativedirector@sandiegowoman.com

Woman San Diego

San Diego

Judith A. Habert

Woman

San Diego

Judith A. Habert Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Sonali Soni Creative Director

Robert Tussey Copy Editing

Lisa K. Miller Photographer

Jaime V. Habert Entertainment Editor

Lizzzy Marples Intern

Now find us on:

www.sandiegowoman.com 11835 Carmel Mountain Road Suite 1304-346 San Diego, CA 92128 888 275 7125 858 735 5301 Graphics/Magazine Layout: Sonali Soni www.sonalidesignstudio.com

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P H OTO G R A P H E R s

W R I T E R S

Robert has been a published writer for over thirty years and has been providing editing services for the past twenty-five. As a musician, he has written scores of songs. His life has revolved around his music and writing, often melding the two into articles and interviews.

Elaine McGhee

Elaine is a working mom of two who is truly “in the groove of life” balancing being a mom, a wife and leading a fulfilling work life while pursuing her passion for empowering moms. From her own emotionally traumatic return to work after her first child, ThriveMomma was born. She has spent the past four years researching, coaching San Diego moms and crafting a mindful approach that helps them thrive as they go back to work after maternity leave and beyond.

Carol LeBeau

Carol LeBeau spent close to 30 years as a beloved fixture on San Diego News. Today she is enjoying her retirement, as well as a second career as an in demand speaker at functions throughout San Diego. In addition to her many speaking engagements, Carol is a columnist for San Diego Woman speaking about life after her news career.

Eva Starr’s spiritual journey has taken her coast-to-coast digesting the various schools of thought. Starr a transplant from Cleveland, OH currently writes for The Journey Magazine. When she’s not writing you’ll find her cooking for the homeless and the Veterans of North County.

Lyna Nath

Deeba Van Overberghe

Originally born in Cambodia, Lyna now makes her home in Bonita, California. After nearly fifteen years in public education, Lyna is currently an aspiring artist and writer. In both of her arts as well as her writing projects, she infuses elements of beauty and darkness that are present in life. Her goal is to illuminate the various aspects of life through her creative work.

www.photographybylisak.com

Carol Garan

Debbie Storms Debbie has enjoyed many careers from accountant to air traffic controller. She believes life is an adventure to be lived to its fullest. Growing up in New Jersey, she learned life skills to help her practice that credo. Her passion for travel has taken her to many parts of the world. She is now focusing on writing about her travels and interviewing entertainers, which is a great combo!

Carol Garan is married and lives in San Diego. She has had three careers in her lifetime, that of Wife and Mother, Executive Secretary, and subsequently an Actor. Carol finally found her passion in the arts and besides acting in commercials, TV, and theater she has been writing for years. These Tales of the Original Soccer Moms are retrospective of her many years with four children who were all involved in sports.

Jeani Zuber

Jeani spent close to 30 years as a successful professional in the marketing and business development fields, which included both medical and private sector companies. Presently retired she takes great pleasure in her second career as a gifted free-lance writer for several publications. She is currently writing a book.

Monica Lucas H.H.P, RYI, CPCC, CHT Lisa Matar

Lisa is the owner and creative director of AllFabulousThings.com, a lifestyle website covering fashion, travel, beauty and special events. She frequently interviews public figures and fashion designers. Lisa Matar has been a contributing editor to San Diego Woman Magazine since 2012.

Daughter of an artist, Deeba grew up with the influence of art all around her. At the age of 15, she witnessed the installation of a Salvadore Dali exhibit in Chicago, standing inches from "Persistence of Memory" and "St. John of the Cross." She was thrilled when she had the chance to interview Madame Argillet. Deeba has dedicated the last 14 years to refining her artistic talents and abilities in Fine and Decorative Arts and Illustration. She has illustrated books here in San Diego, painted murals as far away as Indonesia and flown to places like Wyoming and Hawaii for Decorative Painting.

San Diego

Robert Tussey

Lisa is the owner of Photography by Lisa K, a custom portrait studio located in San Diego, specializing in the highest quality portraiture. As the mother of twins, Lisa shines at capturing moments in pregnancy and early life. She shares her talents with many local charities

Woman

Eva Starr

Lisa K Miller

Maile Rudebusch

Maile graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in broadcast journalism. Since graduating she has continued to pursue her passion for writing through creating articles about fascinating people and places in San Diego.

Maggie Ramos Maggie is a poetry writer, who has been writing poetry since her early teenage years. She has previously published with the group Bohemios por Amor (Bohemina’s of Love). Ramos is from San Diego Ca. with an engraved Hispanic background from Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico. She is currently attending Mira Costa College and The Escondido Adult School. Ramos is working on a collection of poems to be published in English and Spanish.

Monica is a Licensed and Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, Professional Vision Expansion™ Specialist, Certified Hypnotherapist, Registered Yoga Instructor and certified Y.O.U. Practitioner, with a background in business management and leadership training. Monica started her own holistic practice in 1996 and has been an active part of that community. Her new book “Why Yogis Live on Mountain Tops” is the story of her own humorous journey of finding spiritual enlightenment and what to do once you think you have.

Elizabeth (Lizzy) Marples Lizzy is a junior, soon to be senior, at High Tech High in Point Loma. She came to San Diego Woman as an intern hoping to get a look at what goes into publishing a magazine. She enjoys writing and is excited to get the chance to be published.

Diana Vahedi Diana is a published poet and teacher. She is currently working on two children's books and a young adult novel entitled, "My Alter Ego: How I Survivied Middle School as a Walking Lightning Rod." Diana hopes to inspire her own students to pursue their dreams of becoming writers someday. She lives with her husband and two daughters in North County.

Jim Mutton Though a communications engineer by trade, with a Ph.D. in Engineering from UCLA, Jim developed a love of writing in high school, and continued his study of the English language throughout college. He has written articles for the newspaper and regularly edits columns and books for other writers. He was a TV news anchor and program host for several years and developed program scripts and advertising copy. He has specialized in producing material for political campaigns, including speech writing and advertisements.


Letters Editor to the

Thank you for introducing me to my now favorite Greek Restaurant. Meze in the Gaslamp not only has the best variety of Greek food, but the attention to detail and gracious staff makes every visit an amazing experience. Mari from San Diego

fun group and I can’t wait to see them live. Is there any way you can post their upcoming schedule on your website or in your next issue. I am sure your readers would love to support these talented women. Barbara from Poway

Reading the article by Ms. Storms on Huey Lewis & The News brought me back in time. I have always been such a big fan. I was at their concert and it was wonderful. Thanks for reminding us older folks that our favorite groups are still around and doing well. Frank from Oceanside

Thank you for informing your readers about Lotus Rain Naturopathic Clinic. I have believed in Naturopathic medicine for many years and I have heard from friends that their health has improved greatly after using this type of medicine. I have decided to give it a try myself and I will be making an appointment Frances from Solana Beach

There are times when I felt like everything I do is wrong when it comes to playing the role of “Sports Mom.” Reading your article helped me feel like I was doing an okay job at it. Being a single mom, I tend to overcompensate with my two boys. My ex seems to think that he should be the only one who takes the boys to their games, but I disagree. About a year ago, I insisted that we split the task and I truly believe that my boys are happier that we both get to see them perform in their games. I wish things could be different and we could get along well enough to be there together at their games, but for now at least, the boys know that we both care. Thanks for sharing this informative article with your readers. Leslie from Encinitas It was so nice seeing the familiar face of Susan Taylor on your cover. I loved watching her for years on the news and reading her touching story about her Dad made me feel like I knew her personally. We all have so much in life to be grateful for, and the fact that Ms. Taylor has moved into a position where she can help others shows what a wonderful person she is. So glad her Dad is well and that we have a hospital like Scripps in San Diego. Connie from La Jolla

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Way to go Saxations! What a cool group. These women have set the stage for women everywhere. It is so amazing that Dr. Vidal, who is a Chiropractor by day, decided to explore a lifelong interest and start an all-female saxophone band. They seem like a

Kudos to Jaime! There are those of us out there who have agendas that don’t include having a grandiose wedding. Some of us care more about getting educated and making a difference in the world. When I was in my twenties my parents started pushing me to date and find the right man to spend my life with. I was more interested in my studies than parties and dating. When I was in my thirties I was more interested in advancing in my career. When I was in my forties I decided that it was time to date, but I still didn’t want to be married. So I found a great man, who was a great companion and I enjoyed his company, when I wanted to. Now I am in my fifties and give a lot of my time to local charities. I help foster children and have great friends both male and female. I don’t feel like I missed out. If women want a man, than by all means they should get married, but no one should ever feel the pressure to do so. Life is an adventure. We should all be allowed to live it as we desire. Anita from Carlsbad I can’t wait to get Karyn Buxxman’s book. I suffered an unexpected heart attack at the age of 43. I never even knew women got heart attacks, my husband used to kid that women only gave heart attacks. But, it snuck up on me and I learned to live my life differently. Lower the stress and LAUGH more. Karyn is so right. For anyone with any illness. Laughter makes it all better. Even if it doesn’t, it makes the journey less painful. Ellen from Mira Mesa

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Sandy Jackman Pantai Inn

Imagine traveling a few short miles from home and arriving at an oasis that transforms you to another world over 8,700 miles away. Well thanks to Sandy Jackman, and the Jackman family, this is now possible. In 2010, the Jackman family took a leap of faith and acquired a gorgeous piece of property overlooking the Pacific Ocean in La Jolla. The gamble of course was not with the location, which was ideal, but the run-down dilapidated motel located on it. The property had been vacant for almost a decade with water, gas, electricity and other infrastructure in total disrepair. When they began turning things on, unforeseen problems arose from one end of the property to the other. In addition to the decayed infrastructure, the buildings themselves were derelict with crumbling interiors and facades. To most others, the path would have been to tear down the neglected buildings and replace them with new. But Sandy and the Jackman family were in love with the charm of the almost century old buildings comprising the acre campus. If they had simply torn down the old motel and started with a blank slate, the project would have not only been less expensive, but a lot easier to achieve. They would not settle for the easy way out as they embarked upon a four-year journey, hiring experts in historical restoration and artisan craftsmen skilled in the old-world trades of plaster, masonry and woodworking. What made Sandy and family decide to bring Bali to San Diego? “We didn’t actually. We had a beloved friend and architect, David Soanes, who had worked on our home and was larger than life. From his experience, having designed high-end resorts in Indonesia, he took one look at the property and had an instant vision for what it could become. He gathered my family and sat us in a circle in the center of the property with our eyes closed and told us to envision rice patties, balmy breezes, tropical paradise, lush mountainsides, and small villages, Balinese villages. My husband and I saw it immediately. The way the layout of the buildings were, we could visualize the transformation of this shoddy rundown motel into a Balinese village paradise.” From that moment on, Sandy’s life was absorbed by Balinese culture and lifestyle. They scoured the internet to learn everything they could about Bali; the life, the customs, the people, the music, the food, the clothing, the décor, the art and more. Their desire was to have the Pantai Inn as authentic as possible with the infusion of Bali. So luckily Sandy was able to make contact with a woman named Mersy who was a local Balinese woman. “It was rough in the beginning due to the language difficulty, but before long we were able to understand each other. She turned out to be a great resource for us. She would drive around Bali and take photos of different parts of the island for us to study. I learned so much from Mersy.” The project was moving along well, when all of a sudden the worst thing that could have happened to them did: Their dear friend David, their larger than life architect, passed away.


Not only was David a treasured friend, but since he had lived 6 years in Bali, he knew better than anyone how to bring the essence of a luxury Balinese resort to San Diego. In reality, he was the only one among all of them who had ever been to Bali. What was even more unique about David was his ability to think outside the box. So now their search was to not only find a new architect who could understand their concept, but one who could also think outside the box. It took quite a while and a great referral from a friend to bring them in touch with Greg Castle. “Greg had a background in working on waterside restaurants and tropical settings which we knew would be helpful with accomplishing our vision.” It was at this point though, that Sandy, Larry and family decided that without David’s instinctive knowledge of Bali to draw from, they would certainly have to visit Bali. Next was the decision on who would be going. At the time Larry’s mother was in poor health, so they decided to send their new architect Greg Castle. In the two weeks between making the decision and heading off to Bali, all of the Jackmans would be working day and night to create a “get-it book” for Greg to take with him. In it would be all of the special items that Sandy, who was the primary designer of the resort, felt were necessary to fit their dream of creating an authentic Balinese Luxury Resort. With a huge binder in hand, Greg and his daughter headed off to Bali for a buying trip for the Pantai Inn. Every night, Sandy would speak with Greg on the phone (from Bali) and he would email photos of what he had purchased for Sandy to check it off their list. Mersy was serving as Greg’s driver, taking him all over the island to the areas where wood carvers, stone carvers, artists, tile makers, etc., were located and Greg would select what Sandy had chosen and the next day the same exercise would be repeated for several weeks until it was time to come home. When the forty-foot shipping container from Bali arrived at the Pantai Inn with its carefully packed cargo, Sandy and the rest of the family gathered to open the crates as if they were children at Christmas, excited to see what each new crate held in store for them. For the most part, much of what was shipped made it safely across the Pacific but many of the items were damaged going through the customs inspection process. Some of the most disappointing items damaged were the hand carved very intricate irreplaceable Candi Bentars (entrance gates), which are large, temple looking towers that had met with a customs agent’s foot, and shattered into hundreds of pieces. They hired a specialist who worked full-time for many months reassembling, piece by piece, making molds to fabricate what could not be recovered. Once the furnishings and decorating was done we moved on to linens and draperies and landscaping. Again it was Sandy’s dream to make it as realistic as possible: So days and days of research led her to the perfect mix of plants, flowers and bushes that would be found in

Bali; taking into account the differences in climate so she was sure that they would not die during the La Jolla winter, rainy and overcast months. “I thought this part would be easy, I would just hire a landscaper and he would handle it all. Unfortunately, no one could understand my vision for Bali. So after just a few attempts I had to give up and do it myself. I picked every plant that is here and placed each in its respective position around the property. The only thing I didn’t do is physically plant them. Sandy’s horticulture expertise was self-taught. She also acknowledged learning a lot from one-on-one training with the well-known gardening expert and landscape architect Bruce Asakawa when they worked together on a project thirty years prior. It is obvious when you walk through this incredible resort that what they have accomplished is nothing short of amazing. Close your eyes as you walk through the Candi Bentars and you will feel as if you have entered Bali. What makes this an even more amazing feat is that none of the principles of this property have ever been to Bali. Visitors have come to the resort and told the Jackmans that they have been to Bali and stayed at luxury resorts and that they have not missed a single detail, from the bamboo ceilings to the gold paintings to the tile risers in the gathering room, it is all the exact same quality as found in the finest Balinese hotel. All of Sandy’s design work is spectacular and Larry and the rest of the family seem to work in complete harmony to create the perfect balance. Sandy, a native Californian, is well accomplished and has an exceptional knack for creativity. Seeing how perfectly Sandy and Larry worked together, led me to inquire as to how they met, Sandy told me the story of how she met her husband Larry while giving blood and bone marrow to her father. At the blood bank, Larry handed the petite young girl a handwritten note asking her to call him to arrange a date. Little did Larry know at the time, Sandy used his note as scratch paper to write down someone else’s phone number. It took a few weeks and encouragement from her mom to make the call, but she eventually did. Their first date was to visit her dad at the hospital. What sealed the deal for her was the following month when she paid a surprise visit to her father to find Larry there playing chess with her dad. Larry had found out how much her dad loved chess, and without even telling Sandy, he had been visiting her father’s bedside to play chess with him daily. They were married shortly thereafter and are now the proud parents of two grown daughters, Jennifer and Michelle. Jennifer lives with her husband and two children in Hawaii. Michelle is engaged to be married in October of this year and is currently working at the Pantai Inn. When ask what the future holds for Pantai Inn, Sandy simply answers it is a labor of love and a legacy for our children and grandchildren. With special Balinese themes scheduled for their guests, keep track of the calendar and make a reservation today. How else are you going to be able to go to Bali? A stay at the Pantai Inn and you will swear you have been there.


The Golden Ratio Salvador Dali, Pierre Argillet and Madame Christine Argillet By Deeba Van Overberghe Looking at an image created by Salvador Dali, one might recall expressions of the subconscious or the surrealistic take on real life, but I think of Madame Christine Argillet. She is the daughter of Pierre Argillet; publisher and lifetime confident of Dali. Pierre Argillet was instrumental in the celebration of Dali’s genius and creativity. Together they produced nearly 200 etchings. His friendship with Dali was to span over 50 years and Mdm Argillet was to benefit immensely from their connection. When hearing Mdm Argillet share her memories of time spent with Uncle Dali, an adopted member of her family, her soft voice is filled with joy. Sharing an experience she had when she was very young, she told of playing in a labyrinth at Dali’s home. As she walked the labyrinth, she became concerned she wasn’t going to be able to find her way back, but trusted Dali’s encouragement that all would be well. Upon reaching his bedroom, she was rewarded with egg-shaped candies wrapped in beautiful foils. She then ran down to the shore near his estate and, upon his encouragement, threw the candies onto the stones near the fishermen to see the effect it would have on them. She said the candies made this loud, sort of rattling sound as they fell against the stones. “I didn’t think anything was wrong,” she remembered, “I was just a little girl and to me this was just a game.” These were playful times for them and the perfect example of the fun they would have, exhibiting the curious and experimental side of both Christine and Dali. I asked if she felt Dali was analyzing her behavior. She laughed softly and said that when she was young, she was not conscious of that, but later understood it. Dali was shy in his private relationships, which seemed to contradict his public, rather exhibitionistic persona. But with “La Petite Infante,” (the endearment Dali had for the young Christine) he was comfortably shy and yet naturally playful. One can only imagine the way a child would embrace the world of Dali with giant bears at the front door and labyrinths to journey on a hunt for candies. As Christine grew through the seventies and went into the world, she widened her scope of interests in art, and this led to great discussions with her father in regard to the direction art was taking at that time and what she liked. I asked her if it was difficult to grow up with such a force as her father and in the light of Dali’s great work. She said her father had a huge admiration for Dali, and that it was a wonderful experience. She had the opportunity to meet many artists such as Dali, Picasso, and Wilfredo Lam. Her relationship with her father was very close. They shared many thoughts and discussions about art, traveled and prepared exhibitions together. She was able to grow into the world of art through these unique experiences probably as no other person ever has. Mdm Argillet is a living record of one of the most dynamic duos in the world of art, her father and Dali. And now she is the curator of her father’s legacy. A true example of the Golden Ratio: the combined dimensions of two create a third, where one cannot exist without the other two. We discussed the upcoming exhibit that will be held here in San Diego at the Meyer Fine Art Gallery. She will be appearing in San Diego August 23rd and 24th in support of an exhibition of the exceptional DALI: THE ARGILLET COLLECTION which will be on exhibition and acquisition from July 25th through September 6th. This is an astonishing exhibition having toured in several major U.S. cities, among them Dallas, Washington, D.C., Chicago, Miami, and Houston, as well as Singapore. Madame Argillet kindly shared insight to Dali’s approach as he embarked upon the creation of a series. Dali and her family would go on picnics, and he would read several books on the subject, and then ponder its creation for long periods of time. His sketches would soon materialize in a free association sort of way. He would pen a drawing with such ease

and confidence, while quickly rendering various shapes and lines into actual images. His strokes were quick and spontaneous in their birth, as if his pencil was catching up with his intentions. In contrast to his paintings, he would take his time, working for long hours perfecting the aspiration of the Golden Ratio. Commencing with geometric


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shapes, his labor of love rendered color, sometimes working with a brush that had a single hair. Dali’s etchings reflect movement and spontaneity. When he worked with the copper plates, the stylist would sometimes slip. Dali found it difficult to manage; however, he mastered this challenge by drawing rapidly in a visceral and confident manner. We can see this when we look at one of my favorites, “Les Femme-Fleurs au Piano” from the Hippies Series. It is a formal painting of two elegant female hippies in the foreground and a piano lyrically draped over the arms of one of the women. We see characters in the background representing fun and humorous concepts as, I imagine, one woman gazes off into the distance, while the other gazes at us, the audience the “experiencer.” Mdm Argillet said that Dali liked to paint flowers replacing hair on top of women’s heads; such a rare and delicate representation in his work. I asked what she thought Dali might say about the use of the computer in art today. She thought he would be up for it. She said that he would meet with scientists and philosophers, exploring concepts and ideas, as well as techniques. He would experiment by pushing the boundaries with etchings through the use of different tools and mediums such as squid ink, and holograms. She felt he would have explored with today’s technical medium. “He had a huge interest for anything going on at the time, and was so interested in the screen idea that he sketched one of our etchings which was done of a bullfight with a television set (1966). And you would see a very large screen and a monster with a very strange and soft shape which encompasses the screen where there is a bull in the background,” she said. “So I think he was very conscious of that. He made many works on holograms. His last two paintings were where you would see one object and then you would see them in relief. So he had this three-dimensional research also. I remember that when I went to one of his big exhibitions in Paris in 1981, I was thinking these paintings look like they are the paintings of a young artist.” Madame Argillet is a force in her own right: Celebrating her father and his work with the great Dali; educating us on Dadaism and Surrealism, both of which have influenced our creative content for decades, and managing exhibitions of Dali’s work around the world. She serves as the whole of these two great icons, together, embodying within herself. When asked if she had any parting suggestions for emerging artists trying to get a foothold in the market today, her response was, “Just dare!” What appropriate advice coming from “Le Petite Infante” who did not lose herself in the labyrinth of her father and Dali, but grew with them into such an extraordinary adult as well as curator of their work. Thank you for sharing this exhibition with us, Mdm Argillet, the world of art is better for it. Please join us and Mdm Argillet as we celebrate her father and Dali. The Argillet Collection will exhibit at Meyer’s Fine Art Gallery: A rare collection of etchings entitled "Songs of Maldoror"; 50 etchings by Dali, done between 1934 and 1973. A project drawing for one of the etchings, which is a Museum piece, will also be in the exhibition. The Songs of Maldoror have only been exhibited once before, in a four-month exhibit at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art (LACMA), and this upcoming presentation in San Diego will include the opportunity to see this rare collection and to acquire it as well.


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2223 El Cajon Boulevard San Diego, California 92104 619-780-0361 www.lafayettehotelsd.com

for more information contact: julia@lafayettehotelsd.com


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Tales of the Original Soccer Moms Homes weren’t very expensive and new developments were springing up all over America with affordable housing. It’s been a long journey since that first soccer game. They call us the baby boomer generation. America was booming and families were buying homes in newly built communities all over America. Everyone had landscaping and a lawnmower, built in appliances, yards to play in, winding streets where children played and your neighbors went to and from work. Our children walked to school without fear and there were also parks and community swimming pools. It was a new America and our dreams became reality: Opportunity for growth was all around us. The women of the baby boomer generation were raised with a 1950’s housewife mentality and married early, until they grew into the mania of the “sex”-ties mentality, and they raised their broods through the most unfashionable time in history, the 1970’s. This was the era of Neil Diamond, the Beatles, Elvis, Saturday Night Live and our introduction to youth soccer in America. We missed the boat in those generations. While the women of the 1960’s were burning their bras we were shopping for nursing bras. We were post Beatles or pre Rolling Stones. During Woodstock, many were changing diapers and entertaining their husband’s bosses. World events took a back seat behind the ‘car bed’. Did you ever wonder who the first “Soccer Moms” were? Soccer did not become a popular organized youth sport until the 1970’s. Every kid in America wanted to play soccer. Soccer continues to be an acceptable and valued sport and supported wholeheartedly by today’s Soccer Moms who hover over their children while encouraging them from the sidelines. It caught on big time and they were and still are usually suburban women who car pool back and forth to games. Hence, the popularity of the SUV or Minivan We were the original soccer Moms and didn’t know it. In my case, at the time we were transplants from New York and New Jersey and lived in the South. It was tournament time, late spring, and we were scheduled to play at the school field that day. The usual parents would be there with team colored shirts or hats and Cepacol to spray after yelling down the field at their kids. Gatorade had just been invented so there was not much of that, but team Moms concocted a sweet punch of juice or a bucket of orange slices for the team. The Southern Mom’s yelled in their high pitched voices, “Run the other way sweet pea, he’s on your behind.” We Northern Moms had our own choice phrases, “Get your ass down that field, no, no not that way.” Irene always added “kill number 11”, a number belonging to my son who ran the field like a Sherman Tank taking out everyone in his path. My friend, Irene, wanted to spice up the sideline fun and was getting her boys in the car when she remembered to go back in the house for the Bloody Marys. She emptied the shaker of fragrant tomato juice into her thermos just seemed to be more fun that way once in a while. The kids had no idea what we were drinking. When the games were over on Saturdays, we gathered the car pool kids and headed back home to get ready for the din-

Diego WSan oman

By Carol Garan

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ner parties, usually organized by our Soccer Mom friend, Roz. We had dinner parties every week in those days. Some were planned and some impromptu. We had costume parties, pool parties, soccer parties, basketball parties, football parties, tennis parties, graduation parties, golf tournament parties, gourmet parties, progressive dinner parties, card parties and holiday parties. We were truly living the American Dream. There were many memorable parties and any excuse was good enough to have one. We never had kids at our parties, they had their own friends to play with. We were kids too finding our way through the twenty and thirty-something’s. That was more than 30 years ago girls and I wouldn’t change one minute of it. So enjoy your journey Millennium Soccer Moms. They can be the best times of your lives and you, too, will have wonderful stories to tell the next generation of “Soccer Moms”.


Fire and Nice

Stacey Ross

How this multimedia maven balances helping San Diego’s families and motherhood By Elaine McGhee

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“My six-year-old daughter raised her Barbie doll to my face, that was buried in my laptop, and in wisdom beyond her years spoke to me in Barbie’s voice, ‘Don’t you want to relax and go for a walk on the beach and feel the sand through your toes and just have fun?!’” Her then 6-yearold’s playtime intervention turned out to be Stacey Ross’ most important business lesson. Ross turned her young daughter’s plea into her personal commitment to what she calls “kids first, make the rest happen.” This savvy founder of SanDiegoBargainMama.com learned early on how to find the right mix of helping others while, at the same time, helping her own family. Her journey began after choosing to be a stay at home mom with her two young children. But after four months she grew restless; she always valued having a strong presence in her community. Stacy is a natural born “connector.” Long before the internet Stacey recalls how her desk was full of post-its of people’s names who she should connect for business or friendships. So when she had the calling to start a blog she combined her love of matchmaking with creativity to serve a budding community of moms - all while earning a supplemental family income - on her own terms.

SanDiegoBargainMama was one of the first, and remains a mom-centric hub for local San Diego family events and bargains. Deal-a-day websites like Groupon are commonplace today, but back in 2007 she helped to locally pioneer the concept of sharing local value routinely. The site offers a limited time deal with a deep discount like a recent 75% off an air duct cleaning service. Also featured on the site are mom-friendly articles about how to find deals around San Diego. Be sure to look for the “SDBM tips” for clever ways to save around town. After only 3 months the word of mouth, or “word of mouse” as she puts it, of only 30 friends and family made the blog catch media attention. She recalled how a local news station asked her to do a spot the next morning. She found that since she was getting so many calls from TV stations and the media that it was the perfect time to utilize the already-growing number of regular columnists and guest bloggers who had become contributors to “Team SDBM.” Their enthusiasm towards building community helped to provide a win-win opportunity for Stacey, her team and the TV station. One of the most refreshing elements of her success has been her openness to strategic partnerships. Not doing all the work herself freed up her time to focus on her toddlers and critical business demands. Currently, Stacey is partnering with Debra Simpson of North San Diego Business to bring a one-day Digital Marketing Boot camp to San Diego on September 10th. As a sponsor, Stacey is sharing with her community how they can learn smart ways to market their business online. Originally from the L.A. area, Stacey learned how to shine and find daring ways to navigate the “dog eat dog world.” The fire that “only living in LA can give you” has manifested into business confidence. Boldness to take strategic risks, to make her face her brand, and most recently to launch her sister company SR Media Consulting. Once again combining her innate ability to bring the right people together she helps local and online entrepreneurs with smart ways to affordably get the buzz out via online and traditional marketing. She prides herself on the chutzpah to take risks. The art of risk taking that she admittedly refined over the years: Risks that didn’t always pay off especially as she was starting out overly eager and over extending herself. “Four hours of sleep doesn’t help anyone.” I’m a local ‘mompreneur’ myself, so I was on the edge of my seat waiting to hear the answer to this question: What advice would you give a mom who wants to start her own business? “Find a mentor and practice the art of time management. When you learn this skill as a mom, you become a calmer person and a better leader in your house. It’s an incredibly empowering skill to teach your kids.” Passion for building premier San Diego businesses from the ground-up runs in the Ross family. Her husband Steve’s fascination as a child with tropical fish blossomed into Aquaman Aquarium Services in Carlsbad. He specializes in design and fabrication of residential and commercial aquariums. He turned his excitement into expertise thanks to his parents fostering his love of fish keeping. Another great lesson to parents to always embrace their child’s curiosity - you never know, they could be successful entrepreneurs like the Ross’ I’m inspired by highly successful people who have the ability to build sophisticated businesses in the public-eye, yet stay grounded like Stacey. For her “it’s knowing when to listen to your intuition.” That inner guidance system has become one of her super powers. “That first tiny voice you hear is the right answer.” Stacey Ross’ formula for her media maven success includes equal parts compassionate drive to help San Diego families, using her innate matchmaking gifts in modern marketing tactics, and setting guilt-free boundaries between business and family. This winning combination will continue to fuel her success in San Diego and beyond!


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San Diego

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On May 3, 2014 USO San Diego celebrated their 73rd Anniversary Stars and Stripes Ball at the Sheraton San Diego Hotel and Marina. With more than 500 in attendance and the MUSICorps Wounded Warrior Band providing entertainment, it was an evening to remember. During their 73rd Anniversary Stars and Stripes Ball, USO San Diego proudly presented Eagle Awards to Sergeant Christopher B. Farias, United States Marine Corps, Corporal Jason M. Lilley, United States Marine Corps and Sergeant Dan Casara, United States Army in recognition of their military awards for their extraordinary bravery and dedication to duty in support of our great nation.

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Photos by Melissa Jacobs


Why Yogis End Up On Mountain Tops: From Dimwit to Enlightened in 40 Days Enlightenment into Nothing - My Story… By Monica Lucas

Waiter! I’ll Take My Check Isn’t that what life is about, one huge reality check? When we enter this world we are all the same, slimy and innocent. The doctor smacks us on the rear, we cough and cry and “hello, reality check!” All we did was show up and some stranger slaps us for “our own good” and sets the stage for how it all goes down from there. In order to walk we must fall down, in order to ride a bike we must fall over, in order to have success we must fail. Granted, the amount of times we fall down, over or under will depend primarily on how quickly we catch on, but none the less it is through our pain, that we realize how much the learning curve sucks and we really want to avoid the pain at all possible cost, most of the time. In the course of figuring out what enlightenment was all about, I was exposed to a lot of forms that the enlightenment process comes in. I have peered into most religions, methodologies, therapies, processes and self-help seminars that all paint the portrait of the perfect way to gain salvation, for one low-price. Some were insightful and some were not. Some were a lot of fun and some left me wondering “what the hell just happened?” But none the less, I kept the faith that somehow, I was going to reach enlightenment if it killed me. Based on those encounters, I decided to write a blow by blow guide to one girls take on enlightenment. This book is my story. It’s a story of how and why I think it is so important that we dimwits “get enlightened” and hopefully what I say here will spark something that makes you blink. For in the blink of an eye, life can change forever. What I’m going to discuss is not only about finding enlightenment, it is also about what happens once you think you are there. This book is a guide down that long and winding, humorous side, of the all too human side, of the spiritual journey, because I discovered, reaching enlightenment is not all that serious.

San Diego

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So began my journey into spiritual awakening, in the land of the ignorant, in the dark, dimwitted world of reality and the idea of this tale was to find out how to get to enlightenment city, where things sparkle and shine - or something like that. To be very clear, I am not a scholar or particularly gifted in any spectacular way. I don’t see dead people and I don’t hear voices in my head. I am not a self-proclaimed anything and I have nothing to prove or loose. Often, I have pondered what life is really all about and I hoped that I was living my “life purpose” if there really is a purpose to life as all the experts say. My outlook in life has mostly been hopeful. However, I believe I was born a realist outfitted with designer rose colored glasses and a half-full bottle of milk. It is very typical that once I make a decision to do something, there is no stopping me, just ask my Mom. She experienced quite a bit of that mentality from about the age of two. Also, I tend to have a “take the bull by the horns” approach to most things I do and when you mix that with the stubborn belief system that I can do anything I put my mind to (something I already possessed and that got overly developed at one of those motivational seminars I attended in the 90’s), you have one motivated, strong willed and positive she can do it, woman. And as true as this may be, it usually affords me the ability not to come out of most experiences unscathed. Like most humans I have experienced many negative things in my life and yes, sometimes the negative stuff really bummed me out. Still my positive perspective forged ahead. However, there has been many times when my positive perspective was not met with appreciation. At one point in my career, I had an employer tell me that my glasses were a little too rosy for their liking. I guess positive thinking didn’t mix too well with the tyrannical business model. Needless to say, I only lasted so long at that job. From that experience, I learned two very important lessons. First, not everyone encourages or even likes a positive mindset. Second, there are significant degrees of positive and negative personality types and it varies as to how much is tolerable between them. Some people can be so negative that, even if you have a glimmer of positive behavior, they judge you as being an airy-fairy freak and think that you need to be written a reality check, all of which they are more than willing to sign.

This is an excerpt from the book by Monica Lucas, Why Yogis Live on Mountain Tops: From Dimwit to Enlightened in 40 Days. This book will be released November 2014.

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Who Rules the Home? We all know that the man is King of the Castle. It sounds like we men are really the boss, but in reality we know that the castle and our royal status are only in our minds, and we know who rules the home. It’s not that men don’t have a place there, but the home is “hers.” Men are certainly useful in the home. “Honey, the sink is stopped up again!” “Will you tell Johnny to turn that music down?” “Would you get the ladder out and replace the ceiling light that’s been

By Jim Mutton

clearly ours? Well, if they are either out-of-sight or arranged according to her protocol, they are tolerable. Otherwise we might hear, “I wish you would get rid of some of your clutter (or junk) around the (“my”) living room!” And, back to cleaning out the garage, we are reminded to get rid of all that junk. Now, that junk happens to be our tools, some old car parts, leftover things from some repair job, or perhaps some of our magazines. Who knows, some of those old parts might be useful someday, including that old corroded toilet valve that’s been gathering dust for ten years. Her things, however, enhance the beauty of the (oops, “her”) home. What collectibles are to one person are junk to another. But, to be fair, most men’s things would probably not be selected by a home decorator for contributing to the chances for a housebeautiful award. Decisions on home changes and upgrades are her prerogative whether they make sense to us or not. “What’s wrong with the color of the living room walls?” we say as we get a lecture on the fact that the paint doesn’t match the sofa cushions too well or that the latest trend is muted reds or greens. “But the paint covers the wall, doesn’t it (Bad joke, not too appropriate at this time)?” Just give in at the moment and mumble something along the lines of how you will bring paint samples home and get some estimates; perhaps she will forget about it. Not a chance!

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burned out for two weeks?” Or, one of the worst pronouncements: “Honey, we need to clean out the garage this weekend.” In this case, of course, “we” does not include “her.” The house itself is clearly hers, and we men are reminded of it in several ways. When Johnny comes in the house tracking dirt, we say, “Get back outside right now young man and take your shoes off!” She says, “Stop tracking dirt on my floor!” Yes, that little possessive pronoun is a sure indicator of her ownership of the house. What about the things that we men own, possessions that are

Now, about that castle, a “man cave” might be acceptable if it’s in a corner of a large garage, the basement (not many of these in California), or part of an unfinished attic. We can put almost anything in it. A spare bedroom will not work because it’s too much a part of “her” house. It would be treated the same way as Johnny’s bedroom: “When are you going to clean up this pigsty of a room?” We men know that harmony in the (OK, “her”) home depends on her happiness, so let’s give in and be happy. As the famous saying goes, “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” Yes, guys, and don’t you forget it!


Glamping…The New Camping By Eva Starr Glamping, otherwise known as glamorous-camping, has been around longer than before The Real Housewives of Orange County brought it to fame in April of 2012. Glamping can be traced to the Victorian era when big game hunting was all the fashion. Safari tents and Bell tents were extensively used across Africa and India with servants to look after your every need. The modern-day El Capitan Canyon (http://www.elcapitancanyon. com/) Resort began as a rustic private campground in 1970 on a 300-acre site directly across from El Capitan State Beach, before being re-opened in May 2001 as a Glamping-Resort. Choose between rustic log cabins, canvas tents on wood platforms or your round communal style Yurt.

I did my research and read the yelp reviews so I could get a feel for what to expect and to bring. I did call the El Capitan desk five to six times before my trip asking every question under the sun. Once you’re in the woods and a four-hour drive from home, you don’t want to take any chances. Unless of course you’re Vicki Gunvalson, and then you’d probably have an entourage to handle the details. I booked a cabin near the creek; of course I knew the creek would be dried out. What can I say I’m from Ohio? I wanted the feeling of being by some sort of water, dried out or not. The cabin was knotty pine, with a big double bed, and a loft for the kids, (of which mine are grown and still in Ohio). There’s a stand-up shower, a mini-fridge and a microwave. I brought my own dishes, a wine glass, and a corkscrew, the most important items. After all I was celebrating my birthday. I bought wine and champagne, just in case I couldn’t decide which I should pair with the turkey dogs or the smores. I bought firewood from Home Depot in town before I left but they were out of fire-starters. No problem, I have a neighbor who has a ton of newspapers that should do it. I’m a camper from way back. When my kids were young we camped on the ground with no electricity, running water or any of the extras; I can surely light a fire. Little did I know California wood must be different from mid-west or

east-coast wood because I used almost a whole bag of newspapers and the only thing on fire was my blood pressure. The next two nights, I surrendered and bought fire starters from the campground store: The campground market has everything already packaged in kits for you. Convenient, but $50 for a hot-dog kit for two? For that price I could buy stock in Oscar Mayer. One morning I decided to venture out on one of the trails and see nature at its best. What I did see was two deer, a squirrel and a big sign posted at one point on the trail: WARNING: A juvenile mountain lion has been spotted proceed with caution. Even though I’m a roughing it camper from way back, where there’s a Jr., there’s a Papa. No thanks, I’ll stick to seeing a squirrel here and there and head back to the cabin. On the way back I did come across a strange looking piece of art tucked away in the woods called The Nest, which was my ‘find’ of the hike. From El Capitan you’re a ten-minute walk from the beach, which is known for its tide pools and marine life. I did get a glimpse of a real live starfish attached to a rock, which was the thrill of my trip, running a close second to drinking Frances Coppola’s Petit Syrah with my turkey dogs on a half-lit fire. I guess the fire and I had something in common. Glamping is worldwide, and has really taken off in England, Wales, France and Portugal. As for the US there are 397 Glamping places to choose from. Be sure to do your homework and make it a family affair. In the meantime, I’ll wait for Italy and Maldini.

San Diego

Let’s be clear, the housewives of orange county glamped there in 2001, I went for a three-day birthday retreat a few days ago for my 59th birthday. I’m saving my 60th for Italy, Paolo Maldini and me.

Woman

El Capitan Canyon, where the Real Housewives and myself camped, is a mere 20 miles north of Santa Barbara. Located in a seaside pocket on 300 plus acres on the picturesque Pacific coast, the nature lodging experience at El Capitan Canyon was created for those who have the desire to totally unwind, relax and commune with nature.

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Oatmeal Cookies

Bing! The oven timer alerted me that my cookies were finally done. As I opened the oven door, I was greeted by a blast of hot air, and then the wonderful smell and sight of each mouth- watering oatmeal cookie carefully lined up in neat little rows on the cookie sheets.

I held one in my hand and slowly brought it to my lips. It was warm, soft and gooey, just the way I liked it. I took one bite and the morsel immediately melted on my tongue. The sweet fragrant smell of oatmeal, raisins and brown sugar enveloped me. As the smell wafted through the air, I was transported back to my Great Aunt Emily’s house where she used to cook Lebanese food and oatmeal cookies for me, even when she was battling cancer. My Great Aunt Emily lived in an impeccably kept green and white bungalow on a steep hill in West Roxbury, a neighborhood of Boston. She was a short, stout woman in her mid-sixties, with a round, rosy face lightly etched with wrinkles, and deep set dark eyes and white hair she kept pulled back into a bun with what seemed like hundreds of bobby pins. She always wore dark dresses which contrasted sharply with her ivory skin. She had lived in that house for most of her life with her older brother and sister. Her brother, my Great Uncle Mitch, died before I was born. Emily’s older sister, Alice, was the real cook in the family and died unexpectedly in 1978 when I was only eight years old. None of the siblings ever married or had children; we were Alice’s and Emily’s children. My brother, two sisters and I visited Emily almost every weekend. We were always greeted with a big hug and a huge Lebanese meal. We’d sit around the antique dining room table and listen to the stories about Lebanon, the land of milk and honey -the Paris of the Middle East. We enjoyed exotic foods with names I could barely pronounce like loobie and rooz (green beans with rice in a fragrant tomato sauce), batanjan (stuffed eggplant), and our favorite kibbeh nyeh (raw lamb mixed with bulgur wheat and herbs). Although Emily was a dour person who didn’t smile often, she had a way of making us feel loved and wanted. She was also the strongest and bravest person I have ever known. Emily was diagnosed with breast cancer in the fall of 1976 at the age of 66. She had a mastectomy and chose to wear a prosthesis. I was only six years old; too young to understand what was going on, and too young to visit her in the hospital. The doctors gave Emily only one year to live after her surgery. She lived six. She never complained about her pain or felt sorry for herself. Every night I called her on the phone to make sure she was ok. She always asked me if I had watched the Lawrence Welk

By Diana Vahedi

show. We had the same conversation every night for six years. I still remember her phone number - almost thirty years later. The cancer returned and spread throughout her body five years later. In the spring of 1982, my mother began taking Aunt Emily to weekly chemotherapy sessions. Despite the nausea, pain and weakness, she still managed to cook Lebanese food. She found out that I loved oatmeal cookies, something she hadn’t made that often and every time I went to visit her, she always had a small plastic bag filled with oat meal cookies secured with a yellow wire wrap just for me. “Now don’t eat those all at once!” she’d say with a mischievous grin. The insidious disease took its toll on her physically. Her round, doughy face became thin, jagged and more haggard. Her deep set eyes deeper and ghostly, her wrinkles more furrowed and pronounced, and her once ivory skin turned sallow and yellowish. I looked forward to visiting her because I knew she’d have a bag of fresh homemade cookies for me. Those cookies were more than just a sweet, delicious treat. To me, the most important ingredients were the unconditional love and care my aunt put into making them. No matter how sick or weak she was, there was always a bag of her oatmeal cookies waiting for me - only me. The time came when my aunt succumbed to her illness. Her battle was over. She died on a cold, rainy New England fall day in September, 1982. I was twelve years old. The rain fell in unison with my tears. After the funeral, my dad, brother, sisters and I went back to her house to begin cleaning and organizing my aunt’s belongings. As I walked into the kitchen, there, in the middle of the table, was a small plastic bag tied with a yellow wire wrap full of oatmeal cookies. Tears filled my eyes as I heard aunt Emily’s voice inside my head say, “Now don’t eat all of those at once!”


Barefoot Frolic By Lyna Nath

Twirling Running jogging Stomping romping climbing Straps laces dangling tripping Maroon Mukluk Mules mulling by Mary Janes’ velvet Espadrilles glide Sultry salsa Sling-backs in Valenki black Black-tie Wellingtons old Oxford blues Loafering Galoshes getting lost in mud Rawhide patches with cowboy Spurs White stitches summer Cleats Through third base slides Brogues ballet Slippers dancing Flat footed Sky high arches Throbbing bulging bunions Plantar fasciitis diagnosed the podiatrist Sore soles and hammertoes NO more Give me naked barefoot frolic instead.

San Diego

A warm greeting at the door receiving a crumbled heart shredded in pieces seeking for understanding. Undivided attention open ears to overwhelming feelings and phrases. A transaction in between tied up to ethics and surrounded in respect. Goals to meet, accomplishments to celebrate, confidence and success to pursue. Across from each other confidentiality to keep. Deeply and privately many rotted roots you dig and pull. Fearful overwhelming nights thru a window with you I share. With the intention of letting it all go. Intensively and intimately deep I allow to digest and process the dirty work. Shivering of fear in the middle of restless nights finding strength and repeating your words to myself providing courage to my internal little girl supporting and caring for her. “Everything will be OK, nothing for you to fear, I am here by your side to protect and comfort you my dear.” Carefully with care again and again listening and understanding shallow confusions. In detailed description sharing feelings and emotions humbled and genuine, at times with shame and minimal pride. Like an open book I open my heart and thoughts to you hoping to thrive out of my sadness letting go of strings and ties, seeking to heal and leaving my guilt’s behind. Shameful in tears confused shadows not knowing how to comprehend mixed unidentified feelings. Directed with professionalism, mapping the way out of darkness, rising my life into the light it deserves to live. Step by step guided thru the path of freedom with desperation finding the way out of the web. Until another day a warm greeting at the door thriving for survival and reaching high for life day by day into joyful endless days of laughter with the world to share.

Woman

By Maggie Ramos

POETRY CORNER

“In A Safe Place, In Safe Hands”

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Lights of

LightBridge On Friday July 11, 2014 Old Poway Park was glowing in the warmth of candlelight as the attendees celebrated two of the brightest lights in the community. Peggy Davis and Helen B. McNeal were being honored at the second annual Lights of LightBridge celebration, an event celebrating two very special volunteers, who have dedicated not only their time, but their hearts to those traveling through their end of life journey with the help of the amazing staff of LightBridge Hospice and Palliative Care. Peggy Davis has had a lifelong commitment to volunteerism. She is a member of La Mesa Sunrise Rotary, part of Rotary International, a Worldwide Service organization whose motto is “Service Above Self.” She is certainly a sterling example of giving. With an affinity for animals since childhood, Peggy has been raising and training Rhodesian Ridgeback dogs since 1979. She is a Breeder of Merit with the American Kennel Club. Peggy became interested in Therapy Dog work in 2009, and wanted to focus on visiting our Veterans. When asked by her sister, Barbara Smith, a Family Nurse Practitioner with LightBridge, if she would be interested in visiting the Veteran’s Home in Chula Vista, she jumped at the opportunity. It was clear from the beginning that Peggy was where she and her dogs needed to be. Helen McNeal is the Executive Director of the California State University Institute for Palliative Care located at California State University San Marcos. Prior to joining CSUSM, Helen served as Vice President of San Diego Hospice and The Institute for Palliative Medicine (SDHIPM) where she was responsible for all of the operations of The Institute for Palliative Medicine (IPM). In parallel with her business career, Helen has also been instrumental, both in the United States and Canada in helping to advance the field of palliative and end-of-life care. Helen has consulted with both U.S. and Canadian government agencies on palliative care strategies. Her dedication and determination to spread the word about palliative care to the aging community has changed the lives of so many San Diego residents. After each of these women were honored, davidji, an internationally recognized meditation expert, stress-management counselor, corporate trainer and author led the audience to simultaneously light their candles, creating many points of light in representation of all of those we have loved and lost. Lights of LightBridge was a very unique and one that touched the hearts of all who attended.

Proceeds from the lights of LightBridge benefit the LightBridge Hospice Community Foundation which will contribute to the Foundation's mission and supports exceptional programs that enhance the end of life journey for patients and their families throughout San Diego. These programs include Simple Gifts (end of life wishes), Integrative Therapies, Music Therapy, Jewish Hospice Program Fund and Fund for Excellence. For more information or to make a donation visit their site at http://lbhcf.org/


Dreams Do Come True

practitioner in my practice.” Dr. Larson is a woman who is truly thankful for all that life has given her, but there is one thing that she can’t help but credit for a lot of her success in life, “With all the moves I made for internship and residency programs, to my final decision to transfer to UCLA to practice Dermatology, my husband was always supportive. When I decided on UCLA, Alan had completed his training in Gastroenterology and even though he was offered many prestigious positions in Phoenix, he turned all of them down so I could go to UCLA to pursue my dream. This is truly a supportive husband. This is what I believe a lot of women need. This is team work, and shared responsibility. It takes a team to be successful, and we are most definitely a team.” I had to agree on this point. Dr. Larson went on to add, “when I finished my dermatology training at UCLA I wanted to start both private practice and a family in my dream city of San Diego. However by then my husband’s career was flourishing as Chief of Gastrointestinal Endoscopy at USC Medical Center. Yet again, he agreed to leave his academic career to follow my vision. My husband is simply amazing! He said that he felt that it was better for our family if I got to do what I loved, especially since we wanted to have children, than to fulfill his ego by becoming the head of Gastroenterology.” All I could think to say to Dr. Larson

San Diego

When you walk into the office of Bernardo Dermatology you are instantly struck by the beauty of your surroundings. The gorgeous statues seem more fitting in a museum than in a dermatology office. Bernardo Dermatology is not your typical doctor’s office and to be honest, the doctors are not typical either. It is apparent that everyone who works there is more like family than co-workers. As anyone who has ever ran a business will tell you, the essence of a business comes from the owner, the leader, the one in charge. This is undeniably true. Bernardo Dermatology began 31 years ago this past July by Dr. Ruth Larson, and her leadership has grown this business into a very successful and sought after practice. Growing up in the small farming community of Beaver Creek, Oregon, the first in her family‘s generation to graduate from college, Dr. Larson’s choices were to become either a teacher or a nurse. At the time Dr. Larson chose teaching. With a Master’s in Education Dr. Larson went on to teach biology. Not long after she began teaching, she met the love of her life, Alan, a medical student, and they were soon married. It was a question posed by her new husband which would forever change the course of her life. He asked her, “So, when are you going to do it?” Confused at first, she quickly realized what Alan had already instinctively known: Dr. Ruth Larson was not destined to be a teacher, she was meant to be a doctor. She quickly applied to six medical schools and was accepted to four. She selected the University of Oregon Medical School, where her husband was a resident in the area of Internal Medicine. During her second year, when she had the opportunity to interact with patients there was no longer a doubt in her mind, this is what she was meant to do. Following medical school, Dr. Larson did an internship in internal medicine for one year at Good Samaritan Hospital in Phoenix. “I knew right away I wanted to go into dermatology, since I was very visual and I liked the immediate gratification of helping people and connecting on a personal level. I was very lucky to do a rotation at UCLA, and it was a perfect fit. After I completed my internship, my husband and I were blessed to find out we were expecting our first child, Leah, who now works as a nurse

Photos by Lisa K. Miller

Woman

Dr Ruth Larson

By Judith A. Habert

was where did you find this man? When Dr. Larson’s second child, David, was just 3 months old she opened her private practice with baby in tow and a nanny, breast feeding between patients. Her original nurse Shirley (from 31 years ago) is still with her today along with a staff full of long term employees, many of whom have been inspired to go on to medical school, nursing school and nurse practitioner school. There are eight providers now that help to complete the full service Dermatology Center. Along with Dr. Ruth A. Larson, there is a husband and wife team Dr. Elizabeth Vierra and Dr. Mark Vierra, Dr. Frank Barber, Dr. Lynn Shipman, Dr. Vanessa London, Dr. Julie Gladsjo and nurse practitioner Leah Larson Brown,NP.

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What makes this practice so unique is that although many of the physicians are well versed in the many procedures completed in their office, they all tend to specialize in the areas they most enjoy and to which they feel most committed. Dr. Mark A. Vierra is a board-certified dermatologist who received his training at the University of California, San Diego. Dr. Vierra does most of the Botox and fillers in the office and works with the latest filler that is offered, Juvederm voluma XC. It is used for cheek augmentation. Dr. Francis A. Barber, Jr. is a board-certified dermatologist who received his training at the Naval Hospital, San Diego, CA. He received additional training in skin pathology at the Armed Forces Institute of Pathology, and is certified for special competency in dermatopathology by the American Boards of Pathology and Dermatology. Dr. Lynn Shipman is an acclaimed skin cancer specialist and has completed an additional fellowship in dermatologic surgery and Mohs micrographic surgery at Tufts New England Medical Center in Boston. Dr. Elizabeth E. Vierra is a board-certified dermatologist who enjoys pediatric, adolescent and adult dermatology as well as surgical dermatology. She enjoys all aspects of dermatology and all ages. Dr. Vanessa London is a board certified dermatologist and a Fellow of the American Academy of Dermatology. Dr. London particularly enjoys helping her patients with conditions that impact their quality of life such as severe acne, age spots, eczema, psoriasis, skin cancer, and blistering conditions. Leah Larson Brown, N.P is the daughter of Dr. Ruth Larson, the founder of this dermatology practice, and Alan Larson, M.D, a local gastroenterologist and longtime PPH board member. Leah acquired her R.N degree from the University of San Diego and worked at UCSD’s Thornton Hospital in La Jolla on a medical-surgery ward. Following her dream to practice dermatology, Leah continued her medical training and graduated with honors from the University of San Diego as a Nurse Practitioner. Dr. Julie Gladsjo is a skin cancer specialist, who also holds a doctorate in psychology and is the newest member of the Bernardo Dermatology family. And of Course, last but not least Dr. Ruth A. Larson is a skin cancer specialist, experienced with a wide range of surgical techniques, including Mohs micrographic surgery for the removal of aggressive skin cancer. Dr. Larson is a member of the American College of Mohs Micrographic Surgery. She was on the clinical teaching staff at UCSD and at the VA for over 25 years, but now has retired from teaching dermatologists.Dr. Larson has among the highest cure rate for nonmelanoma skin cancer; over 99% cure rate in over 7,000 Mohs cases with a 30 year follow-up. “I had a dream of becoming a dermatologist and the dream came true. I had a Dream of having my own practice. I had a dream of giving the highest level of care I could give and I gave my employees the book “The Day Maker” because when my patients leave my office I want them thinking wow, I have never been treated so well.” Out of curiosity and not wanting to interrupt the flow of our interview, I later went on the internet to research what this book was all about and it helped me better understand Dr. Larson. The concept of the book is…Why rely on random acts of kindness when you can intentionally show kindness and help to make someone’s day. This is such a true representation of the bubbly personality of Dr. Larson. When asked if her dream turned out as she had imagined, she couldn’t have given a better answer. “It turned out better than I dreamed. I honestly would pay to go to work.”

Expert Advice on Avoiding Skin Cancer Dr. Ruth Larson’s area of expertise is MOHS Surgery. She deals with very difficult skin cancers primarily on the central face. Sometimes her patients have been treated before and could not be cured. The procedure Dr. Larson employs has a 99% cure rate. This is an outstanding success rate, but we would all hope to never have to deal with being told that we have any type of cancer. So I asked Dr. Larson what our readers could do to help avoid getting skin cancer, and what signs should make them pay a visit to their dermatologist. Dr. Larson suggests that if you develop a growth that lasts for more than one month you should consult your physician. To protect yourself against Skin Cancer. Always Wear Sunscreen with an SPF of 30 or above and the words Broad Spectrum on it even if you are just walking around in the sun. The SPF number refers to the ability of a sunscreen to block ultraviolet (UVB) rays which cause sunburns. SPF 100: After seeing commercials for SPFs as high as 100. I asked if it made sense to get the highest SPF available. Her answer finally helped me understand. She explained that “the SPF rating is a measure of the time it would take you to sunburn if you were not wearing sunscreen, as opposed to the time it would take with sunscreen on.” More confusing is that the number ratings are not consumer friendly. An SPF of 60 is not double the coverage of SPF 30. In reality you will only get 5-6% more coverage with an SPF rating of 60 than with the SPF 30. Broad Spectrum: Since the SPF rating only protects you against the UVB rays it is important to be sure that the sunscreen has the words Broad Spectrum on it as well. This is the protection against the UVA rays. These rays are more closely linked to deeper skin damage. Water Proof Sunscreen: I also asked if there was such a thing as water proof sunscreen. She corrected me, letting me know that the word waterproof was not allowed to be used. In its place the companies now use the word water resistant, and cautioned that every time you come in from the water, even if you were using water resistant sunscreen, you should still reapply the sunscreen. Put More Sunscreen On: The proper amount of sunscreen to apply is about the size of a golf ball. Sunscreen should be reapplied every two hours even if you don’t go in the water. Do We Get Skin Cancer From Childhood? I had also heard that any skin cancer you get in your lifetime came from when you were a child. Dr. Larson said that although this was thought to be true for a while, it has since been proven to be incorrect. It’s like an adding machine. We get sun damage added whenever we get sun exposure. For melanoma it seems to have some connection to bad burns that we got as children, since babies and children don’t have the protective thick skin yet. Does Eye Color Matter? Surprisingly yes, blue eyed individuals are more susceptible to skin cancer. Also, if you are in England and drive on the left side of the street you are more likely to get cancer on right side of your body. In the US you are more likely to get cancer on the left side of the body since dangerous rays can travel through car windows.


He Said, She

Said

Photos by Lisa K. Miller

However, you ladies add layers to this relatively simple process that don’t exist in any parallel universe (and we men are losing our hair and going grey as this spectrum widens). New lines of swimsuits start filling the racks as early as February. Why, oh lord, why do you still not have an outfit (literally a wardrobe) for the beach picked out on the day before us and thirty of our closest friends descend on Moonlight Beach for sun, fun, and food. It’s five in the afternoon (again, the day before you need it) and you’re still looking at online catalogs “for ideas.” At six you get into the car and wonder why we don’t want anything to do with your mission. So we’re sitting in the swimsuit section of Kohl’s – we meaning three forlorn guys with the same deer in the headlights gaze - and out you march, for the tenth time, and ask what I think. The other men have averted their eyes so they don’t have to be dragged into the fray or are pretending to talk on their cells. And I, hunter/gatherer from the wilds of Wyoming, have to conjure a reply. And I can never, ever say, “But I thought this season was all about one piece suits.” This is Dante’s Inferno level six. I can’t say it looks great because you’ll storm back into your changing room and look in the mirror until you can’t stand what you see. Then it starts again. Kohl’s, Macys, Nordies, Target, Ross, and its nine thirty and the cleaning crew and one cashier are the only ones left. Here comes the line that renders men completely and utterly speechless: “I think, I don’t know, but I THINK I liked that first one at Macys. I wonder what time they open in the morning.” This is when the cold sweats begin. When the party begins and the burgers and dogs are cooking, all the men are standing around telling each other how they look like death warmed over. Eight out of ten of the men had been through the same thing last night, kindred spirits lounging in the neverneverland of the waiting area of the changing rooms. The women are all comparing notes and complaining how they can’t find a thing to wear. Worst case scenario is two of you are wearing the same thing. I know we men have it easy. Yea! But, really, does it take that long to find a bathing suit that you’re only going to cover up with layers of flimsy flowing things (I really don’t know what to call them) and home in on the footwear of the other ladies. If it takes a man ten minutes to find a suit and a woman three hours – we get it and allow for it. But if you’ve got to hit half a dozen stores and then start looking for something to put on your feet for your one trek a year to the beach, there’s so much more wrong here than the ability to make a decision. And this is only for beachwear. There’s a whole other universe during the year where we go through the same thing. Again – the greying and balding.

Let me preface this response by saying that just in the matter of full disclosure there is only one group of women who have absolutely no problem putting on a bathing suit for a day at the beach with their friends or acquaintances. Who are they? They are a very select group known as “The Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Models.” For the rest of the women out there, it is a constant course of severe distress and sometimes even utter panic. The retailers definitely don’t make it any easier bringing bathing suits out in February. Not to mention the fact that living in Sunny San Diego doesn’t even give a girl a chance to layer up with shirts, coats and jackets to hide some extra winter weight. We don’t even get the winter weight break! So go easy on us. When you men decide it is time for a friendly beach gathering with the “crowd,” and it is always the men who make this decision (because women will always pick a restaurant or a nice dark movie) we are traumatized. All we can visualize are the bodies of the other women who will be attending and where on the ‘fat zone’ scale we fit. If we are lucky enough to be one of the smaller wives in the group the stress degree is lower, but still there is stress since we will never be the smallest woman on the beach: There may be one of “The Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Models” parading around. Some women will tell you that we are conscious of how we look for the men in the group, others will insist it is for the women. I truly think it is how we feel we look to ourselves in the mirror. The mirror is definitely our greatest enemy, unless of course you are from that group, yes, “The Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Models Group.” To this day I will swear, hand on bible, that there are “special” mirrors in the try-on rooms in the bathing suit departments of major retailers. Because there is no way that I would ever select that horrendous bathing suit if it looked the same way in the store that it does in the mirror at home. Maybe it’s the lighting, no I think it is those circus mirrors. Perhaps, I should get the hint when I appear to be about 6’ 4” when I am barely 5’4”. Well in any event, bathing suits are a nightmare and as a man, more importantly, as a husband, you need to be understanding and patient with us, or be smart enough to never ever again suggest a beach event. The only way we might consider it is if you want to take us to a beach on a tropical island where we will never again see the people on the beach. Having said that, let’s get back to the Speedo issue. I was a sweet innocent 17 year old when I was first blinded by the site of a Speedo. It is as if it was yesterday; an image forever branded into my memory. My friend Kathy and I were on our first vacation together. We saved all year to take a cruise and the crew on the ship were all from Italy. At the first port of call a lot of the crew was given the day off to enjoy the beautiful Bermuda beaches. With our beach bags in hand, Kathy and I set our feet upon the pink Bermuda sand and came face to face with a beach full of Italian speaking volley ball playing Speedo clad men of varying ages and sizes. Yes, all sizes. Even the 300+ pound chef was wearing a speedo…or at least what we could see of it. Apparently, in Europe at that time there was no other choice in men’s bathing suit attire. I must agree a Speedo should only be worn on the diving platforms of the summer Olympic Games by those attempting to win a Gold, Silver or Bronze Metal. So let’s make a pact. No more complaining about it taking us two weeks or more to pick out the perfect bathing suit, especially when you make the plans for a trip to the beach in the first place, and we promise to never pull out those pictures we have of you guys in your speedos, posing, when you all thought it was the fashionable way to go!

San Diego

In years past we’ve covered much of the male/female condition in this column. What never ceases to amaze is that there’s always something new in that chasm between the man/woman paradigms on every front. Summer always brings a new set of head-slapping-knot-in-the-stomach situations that defy logic. Men, unless you’re at a BMI of 18 or less DON’T WEAR SPEEDOS! Seriously, you have so many other choices. Why embarrass your wife and her friends and scare complete strangers. This is our biggest mistake in going to the beach. All other sober behaviors are well within reason of the male spectrum of silliness.

Woman

Are Men really from Mars and Women from Venus, as author Dr. John Gray states in his bestselling book? Do men and women really see things that differently? If given the same question could their answers really be so different? At San Diego Woman we wanted to explore the differences between "them" and "us". Read this month's installment and find out how the sexes differ when it comes to communicating with each other. What topics would you like to see us duke it out over in upcoming issues? No topic is off limits, so write me at editor@sandiegowoman.com. I can't wait to hear from you!

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Transitions

with

Carol LeBeau

Green Flash

I’m ashamed to admit it, but I was a “green flash” denier for years. Oh, I’d heard tales of the optical phenomenon…the brilliant flash of green that occurs as the sun sets over the ocean… since moving to San Diego in 1981. Many confirmed reports and trusted friends have testified to the existence of the green flash. Even Wikipedia believes…calling the atmospheric event “a green spot visible for no more than a second or two just above the sun as it sets.” It’s just that I’d never seen the green for myself. It’s not for lack of trying. From Ocean Beach, La Jolla Shores and Coronado, I’ve stared…afraid to blink…waiting for the sun to sink in the west so I could get a peek at the rumored flash of green. I’ve even watched from the patio of the Pacific Beach restaurant named for the famous phenomenon… hopes dashed once again when the green flash was a no-show. Over the years, my faith in the flash

faded and I finally stopped trying. Well, guess what happened when I least expected it? Like a gift from God, the green flash revealed itself…and today, I’m a believer! It happened a couple of months ago when my friend, Vicki and I decided to take her sweet terrier mix for a walk. Vicki suggested a stroll along Sunset Cliffs. It was late afternoon…cool and clear…a classic San Diego early summer day. Vicki, Buddy and I hiked nearly two hours along the coastal cliffs south of Ocean Beach. Named for its exquisite sunset vistas, Sunset Cliffs encompasses nearly 70 acres of bluffs and walking paths high above the Pacific Ocean. As luck would have it, we completed our walk just as the sun was disappearing in the west. The sky was clear… horizon unobstructed…conditions perfect for an appearance by the elusive flash of green. As we gazed at the sinking sun, Vicki (a believer from several personal sightings!) said quietly, “Keep watching.” And just as the sun slipped below the horizon, I saw it… an unmistakable ray of green shot up from the sunset point… then disappeared. For a moment I didn’t move - didn’t breathe. When I could finally inhale again, I turned to Vicki and did something akin to a “happy dance.” Then (and equally troubling to onlookers) came a pathetic fist pump and high-five with Vicki. As we headed back to the car, she pretended not to know me, but I didn’t care. We’d just seen something extraordinary. Overwhelmed by a deep sense of amazement I thanked God for magical moments and the beauty of a sunset. We live in paradise, folks. And the green flash? It’s for real!

Notes to Our Sons & Daughters-

My Sister’s Voice

A photographic exhibit with over 450 guests in attendance was held for the benefit of the Center for Community Solutions (CCS). The stories of these women were of their strength and courage. The stunning black and white photographs were captured by local photographer Pablo Mason and under the creative eye of visionary Alexis Dixon. For more information visit http:// notessd.com/. For more information on the Center for Community Solutions visit their site at http://www.ccssd.org/

Pablo Mason - Local Photographer & Alexis Dixon Project Creator and Visionary Director Photos courtesy of Alexis Dixon/Photography by Lauren Radack


San Diego Woman Magazine’s Women in Business

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San Diego

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Woman

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San Diego Woman Magazine’s LOTUSRAIN NATUROPATHIC CLINIC, INC. Dr.Kristine Reese At LotusRain we offer Naturopathic primary care in a positive, light-filled space. Additional services include IV Therapy, Integrative Oncology, HBOT, and Infrared Sauna. Join us in your pursuit of optimal health by contacting our office via:email at dr@drkristinereese.com phone at 619-239-LIFE (5433) or visiting us online at www.lotusrainclinic.com We are located at 5210 Balboa Avenue, Suite F, San Diego, CA 92117 Optimize your care, your health, your life! STREETER PRINTING, INC. Adrienne Streeter, President Streeter Printing has been successfully serving the San Diego County Community since we were founded in 1980. We offer full service offset & digital printing as well as graphic design, bindery & mailing services. 9880 Via Pasar San Diego, CA. 92126 (Located in Miramar area) (858) 566-0866 ais@streeterprinting.com www.streeterprinting.com EAST COUNTY MORTUARY & CREMATION SERVICE Uyen Do Tender, Caring, Compassionate, Knowledgeable And Attentive To Your Needs. "A Woman's Touch." 347 N. Magnolia Ave El Cajon, Ca 92020 619-518-8510 dothaiuyen@gmail.com www.eastcountymortuary.com Howard West Coast Realty Nancy K. Howard Real Estate Broker Agent-Owner Serving All North County Coastal & Inland "My Concern is You." Real Estate Broker Agent-Owner 760-215-0615 nhowardRE@yahoo.com http://www.howardwestcoastrealty. com/ Elizabeth “Liza” Pille VP-Wealth Management The P & L Group at Morgan Stanley Morgan Stanley Wealth Management 4350 La Jolla Village Drive, suite #1000 San Diego, CA 92122 Phone-858-597-7796 Fax -858-597-0455 Toll Free 1-800-299-0812

Women in Business

Liza.Pille@MorganStanley.com Referrals are the cornerstone of our business success. Your referrals are both welcome and most sincerely appreciated. For market updates and other wealth management tools-as well as an easy link right to your account information- please visit our website at: http://morganstanleyfa.com/pandlgroupsb Rose Cove Jewelry Lori Tussey Attractive Jewelry At Affordable Prices Special Occasion & Everyday Lori.tussey@att.net 619 929 1341

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San Diego

Logo Product Experts and CorporateClientGifts.com Chris Elliott chris@lpeusa.com (760) 931-2633 1042 N. El Camino Real #B371 Encinitas, CA 92024 Logo Product Experts areas of expertise include printed, engraved and embroidered gifts, give-aways and apparel that help organizations project their brand in an unforgettable and positive way. LPE serves both national and local businesses, schools and universities, municipalities and non-profit organizations with a creative and resourceful approach to defining and meeting the desired outcomes of marketing programs through the use of branded products.

Niederfrank's Ice Creams, Inc. Patti Finnegan & Mary Ellen Faught, Owners We've been making the best 100% Natural ice cream for over 65 years. We make our ice cream using the most antique, inefficient, outdated process in the world. We think you will agree, the results are delicious.

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Labbe Health Center Dr. Joni Labbe DC, CCN, DCCN, FCCN Specializing in the nutritional and neurological needs of women with Hashimoto's disease and hypothyroidism. Author of: " Is Mid-Life Mooching your Mojo". 5440 Morehouse Dr. suite 2600 (858)483-4770 office www.thyroid-dr.com service@drlabbe.com

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A Cosmetic Clinic By America’s Favorite Dermatologist

Dr. Tess Mauricio HOME OF THE TIME MACHINE PROCEDURE

Now Open In: Del Mar / Solana Beach National City Glendale Scripps Ranch

Don’t miss Dr. Tess and Dr. Brian Alman’s new book,

California Total Beauty! Look and Feel Your Very Best, Both Inside and Out! Available now at Amazon.com www.CaliforniaTotalBeauty.com Jen is 59 and a Grandmother of 12!

Main: (858) 689 - 4900

www.mbeautyclinic.com

YOU’VE SEEN DR. TESS ON: The Rachael Ray Show, America’s Next Top Model, The Talk on CBS, The Doctors, Fox News, San Diego Living, The Dr. Oz Show, The Dr. Tess Show, & more!


+ SAN DIEGO HEALTHCARE PROFILES

To Honor the Passage

Hospice is so much more than what you might think. Hospice is about embracing life, making sure your loved one and your family are comfortable, comforted, and connected during the end-of-life journey.

H

Respect and Dignity

LightBridge hospice & paLLiative care serves all of

“My mother’s first hospice service didn’t communicate well,” relates Karen Ladner. “Whenever we called with a question, we had to wait for a return call. We never

Scan this tag for more information at the website.

Get the free mobile app at

http:/ / gettag.mobi

858-458-2992 LightBridgeHospice.com

LightBridge staff is available at 858-458-2992 seven days a week to help and answer your questions.

6155 Cornerstone Court East, Suite 220 San Diego, CA 92121

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San Diego

had a specific person working with us.” Many families don’t know they can change hospice providers. When Karen learned this from Peg, she also learned about LightBridge. Her family quickly made the switch. “LightBridge gave us a sense of security that everyone was there for us, but we also had a specific point of contact, someone who was aware of everything happening along my mother’s journey,” says Karen. “My mother appreciated the respect she was shown right up to her passing, so when my father reached a point where he wanted hospice care, too, there was no hesitation in turning to LightBridge. “Every end-of-life journey is unique,” Karen adds, “and LightBridge helped us accept and embrace that. For the team at LightBridge, this is not a job; it’s a calling.”

San Diego County. LightBridge offers patients and families a holistic approach to pain and symptom management, as well as spiritual, emotional, and psychological support. Hospice services are covered by Medicare, MediCal, and most insurance plans. LightBridge offers a wide range of specialized services, including programs for Veterans and patients with dementia, as well as the Ohr Ami Jewish Hospice program; Healing Touch; aroma, music, and pet therapies; education and support for caregivers; and bereavement care and grief counseling.

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ospice care meant Peg Eddy’s father remained at home, his pancreatic cancer pain controlled, without the needles and IV tubes that would have accompanied a hospital stay. It meant Peg’s family could visit without watching a clock. It meant there was no need for a frantic, futile ambulance transport when it came time to say good-bye. “I don’t see how we could have managed that without hospice,” says Peg. Twenty years later, Peg turned to LightBridge Hospice & Palliative Care to smooth her mother’s end-of-life journey. “From the beginning, LightBridge eased my family’s worries,” shares Peg. “It took just minutes for LightBridge to bring my mother into the program and deliver the medications she needed to make her comfortable.” Peg says LightBridge surrounded her family with compassion and care without ever being intrusive, and it was adept at anticipating the family’s needs and questions and offering thoughtful solutions. “Thanks to LightBridge, we didn’t have to expend our energy worrying about my mother’s medical care. Instead, we focused on being a family, enjoying our time together.”

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ARE YOU LOOKING TO BE CREATIVELY INSPIRED? Story & Photos By Jeani Zuber

While in town having lunch with a close friend we accidently discovered the most inspiring scrapbooking, mixed media, jewelry, and card store in Escondido. Cheryl Ciuffreda is the owner, a brilliant and talented lady who has combined her love of paper, pictures and memory art into an unrivaled showplace, “The Making Place”. The moment you walk through the door of this girly industrial chic establishment you are captivated by a visual experience abounding with creativity. Cheryl wanted a business that was fun. She has coupled her decorating abilities with her own personal items to fashion a unique mixture of home and an eclectic art studio. Her store inventory includes Tim Holtz signature lines of distressing inks, embellishments, paints, and fabric. Additionally there is an extraordinary choice of stock items which include two-sided papers (which have become difficult to locate), a wide variety of stamps, glitter (including very fine glitter), zippers, chipboard books, punch boards, flowers and tons of ribbon in various colors and sizes. She has purposefully placed everything that matches together either by color or theme which makes it easier for the customer to imagine how a beautiful page

or chipboard book or project would look. Would you believe all of her inventory is reasonably priced? It’s true. I should know as an avid scrapbooking, mixed media, customer who has frequently shopped every store from Orange County to Arizona. The excitement also comes when you browse the remarkable décor along with the inventory. Watch out for unusual items from a previous era such as a rusty old chicken feeder now used to dispense ribbon, or an old lamp frame that has been repurposed by adding old metal time clock plates that years ago held punch cards (to clock in and out for your work) is now being used to hold family pictures. Included in these curious eye catching pieces is a coffee table in front of the sofa that was once an architect’s table and the drawers once held plans and blueprints of people’s homes and buildings. Yes, even old wire bed springs attached to a wall with artfully made cards stuck between the springs. Obviously this is not your ordinary craft store. Classes, classes and more classes taught for adults and children by well-known people in the industry such as Michael Strong who is himself a stamp designer and teaches techniques using stamps to make cards. Kelly Kilmer, who was featured in “Art Journaling Magazine” and specializes in teaching art journaling. Jamie Dougherty being a mixed media artist demonstrates how to decorate framed canvas. Suzy West shows you how to make custom designed banners. In addition are their popular jewelry classes, learning how to solder, chipboard themed projects such as “Disney Express” as well as their outstanding mixed media scrapbooking pages and projects. Complete listing of all classes on FB@ The Making Place Escondido. Making memories and creating art to wear or enjoy is fun and brings much delight into our busy lifestyles as well as lifting our spirits to new heights of enjoyment. Expressing our creative side produces much needed gratification as well as self-satisfaction. Stop by “The Making Place” located at 330 W. Felicita Ave. Suite B-4, Escondido, Ca. 92027 Phone number is (760) 739-8605. Also visit online: Web-site- www.themakingplace.com, FB@The Making Place Escondido, Twitter@Makingplaceesco, Pinterest@The Making Place, themakingplaceesco@gmail.com.


Bitchin’ & Moaning By Judith A. Habert

San Diego

Technology has affected so many different parts of our lives, but it was not until recently that I realized how far reaching it truly was. It has gotten to the point that we now find it very hard to make any decision without relying on our iPhones or iPads. It used to be that we would decide what restaurant we wanted to eat at based on recommendations from friends and relatives who had previously tried these restaurants and raved about the food and service. What movie did we want to see? Again, we would hear from our circle of friends and decide based on their reviews. Which Doctor should we use? Well that was often decided by our parents. Doctors would be passed on from one generation to another. I went to the family practitioner that took care of my mom and dad. When did all of this change? In 2014, when my daughter and I are out and about in a part of town that we are not familiar with, and we need to stop for a bite to eat, I will spot a cute little restaurant and suggest that it might be a good place to try. I cannot even get the full sentence out of my mouth when out comes the iPhone while she logs into Yelp and within 2.5 seconds decides if we should or should not eat there. Her decision is often harsh. If the rating is not at least 4 out of 5 and there aren’t at least 20 reviews she steps on the gas and off we go searching for a place with a better rating. When we decide to get our hair or nails done again, the same procedure occurs. Thinking I must be a dinosaur in the methods I use, I sit there in silence and allow her to make these rash decisions based on other people’s opinions. I rationalize this in my mind by saying, okay this isn’t really any different than taking the opinion of my friends and family as to which restaurant to eat in or what salon to use, or what doctor to trust, only now I have a much larger circle of “friends” to share their opinions with me. Then some doubt starts to creep into my mind. When I relied on my friends and family, at least I knew that we had similar tastes and values. I don’t know these strangers with names like Sally P or Peter T. I suppose I am as guilty as everyone else since I (too) started doing the iPhone search dance with just about every establishment that I thought about frequenting. A new restaurant, a nail salon, a dry cleaner, a hair salon, a lawyer, a doctor….Oh wait! I suddenly realize that I was starting to trust total strangers with some very important decisions. So I decided to do a bit more research. Instead, of randomly looking up a vendor on the fly with my iPhone, I opened Yelp on my computer and went to some of my existing favorite restaurants, salons, nail places

and physicians. I discovered that some of my favorites had horrible ratings. Oh no! How could this be? Was my taste so wrong? Had I been fooling myself all these years into believing that I was smart enough to make my own decisions? Well, I investigated a little deeper and learned something I never knew, and wondered if others knew this? If you go to one of your favorites and look at their reviews there may be 8 or 10 and maybe overall your favorite received only a 2. How can that be, you may ask? Well, go down to the bottom of the page and in a light gray text it will say something like “18 other reviews that are not

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Help I Can’t Make a Decision!

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currently recommended” If you click on that link you will find a lot more reviews which are not included in the vendor’s final rating. In some cases, the non-recommended reviews may all be positive 5-star ratings, yet since they were not included in the final ratings, your favorite only received a negative rating of 2. So I had to query Yelp as to why this was. The answer made me even sadder, “We use automated recommendation software to showcase the most helpful and reliable reviews among the millions that are submitted to the site, but even some legitimate reviews don’t make the cut. We do not have the ability to manually showcase reviews that aren't recommended. Keep in mind, however, that the recommendation softwares (their typo not mine) applies the same objective standards to every business and continually revisits each review to reevaluate its determination.” I feel so much better! At least now I know that the decisions on which doctor, lawyer, restaurant or nail salon I pick are not determined by strangers I never met, instead these choices have been placed in the qualified hands of automated software. Oh how I love technology! I think I will revert back to the olden days and next time I will give that cute little restaurant a try.


You Can Go Home Again By Judith A. Habert

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This past Mother’s Day my oldest daughter, Danielle, gave me one of the greatest gift’s ever, a ticket to New York to visit her in her new apartment with her new husband of two years. With my crazy schedule between the magazine, and launch of The San Diego Writing Academy, there has not been much free time for trips across the country. So at the end of June, I went home again. It has been about 8 years since I had been back east, and one of the greatest parts of my trip was that this was the first opportunity to have some alone time with my grown daughter. My oldest is seven years older than my middle daughter, and my two youngest are only fourteen months apart. So once the youngest was born, there was never much time for Danielle and me. With her schedule adjusted to have time off of work for my visit, her husband continued working and we were left with a lot of time to talk. It gave me a chance to meet my daughter for the first time as a grown woman. An amazing and rewarding experience for a mom. Aside from the enjoyable family time, and the opportunity to get to know her new in-laws, Danielle was determined to show me all of the reasons why I should consider moving back to my birth place. So we fit in as much as possible in the six day visit. Places Danielle lives on Long Island in a town calling Huntington Station, so our first day was spent going into the village, which was a charming town full of character and old world appeal. An old style book store brought back memories of times when all books were not purchased online. The list of well-known celebrities who would be appearing for book signings amazed me. It suddenly made me realize how much I missed the fun and excitement of true book stores. Most people are probably thinking “what a nerd, how are book stores exciting?” but as a writer one of the biggest dreams is of that book signing which includes long lines of fans clamoring for a signed copy of your latest New York Times Best Seller. Next, we stopped for lunch and had what every New Yorker must have on a trip back home, a slice of Real New York Pizza: Not the real New York pizza that you find in places outside of New York. This was a large triangular slice of cheese pizza,

which before it was served Vito, (yes that was really his name) put his hand into a big vat of cold mozzarella cheese and threw it on top. I bet you are salivating right now! To add to the New York Italian experience, our next stop was to a unique family owned and operated store called The Crushed Olive, which had the most amazing selection of infused extra virgin olive oils and balsamic vinegars. You can walk around and sample the many varieties of Olive Oil and vinegars infused with everything from fruit to seasoning to nuts by dipping the small pieces of Italian bread provided. The People The places were great, but the most important element of the trip were the people. I got to spend a day visiting my favorite relatives who I have not seen in close to a decade. Marilyn and Joe who live in Montgomery, New York (or what New Yorkers refer to as Upstate) are technically my cousins, but I have treasured my relationship with them throughout my life, and since my mother’s unexpected passing 17 years ago, Marilyn has stepped in, becoming my second Mom, always there for me remembering those dates that she knows I will be sad, and in need of a virtual hug, even if it is from 3,000 miles away. I also had a chance to have a big old fashion Italian barbeque with friends Nancy & Dan and their grown children, who I also haven’t seen in years. There is nothing like reliving old times with people that you have known since the age of 15. Getting to know the new friends was equally exciting spending some time with my daughter’s sister-in-law and her two beautiful babies, and her wonderful in-laws made me thankful that she has an east coast family to watch over her. Let’s Not Forget the Boroughs…Manhattan & Brooklyn No trip to New York is complete without a tour of the boroughs. I couldn’t make it to all of them, but we did manage to get to Brooklyn and Manhattan. My son-in-law was off, so we jumped on the Long Island railroad and headed into Manhattan. A Broadway show was on the agenda, so we did the New York thing and went early in the morning and stood on the halfprice ticket line - to bring the outrageously high ticket prices to something


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that was just noticeably over-priced. After scoring three 8th row orchestra seats to see Fran Drescher as the wicked stepmother in Cinderella, we decided to grab a train to Brooklyn so I could get the personal tour of the brownstone that the kids lived in when they first moved back to New York from San Diego. I visited probably the coolest Trader Joe’s ever, which was housed inside an old bank building, and ate at a charming Thai restaurant. Then back on the bus to the train to Broadway to catch our show. This, you might think, is enough for one day, but no, the royal tour of Manhattan is not complete without a visit to famed chef Mario Batali’s Eataly. This is more than just a “Place” this is “the Place” to go if you like food; And not just Italian Food, any food. It is a huge combination Supermarket of Italian specialties with three restaurants, wines, beers, desserts, meats, cheeses, seafood, breads, and even a special Nutella room (yes that sinful hazelnut spread). Eataly is a feast for your senses. The sights, the smells, the tastes, I felt like a child visiting a toy store for the first time; pointing and resembling a deer in the headlights. My daughter had to drag me by the hand from place to place through the crowds of others obviously experiencing similar sensations. After standing in an area called the piazza and feasting on five different meats and six different cheeses with fig and apricot sauces and pignoli nuts, we attempted to exit the building, but were defenselessly drawn to the Nutella room, where we had no choice but to sample the Nutella brioche and crepes.

• Hot dogs with Vidalia onions from a street cart • Knishes • Garlic knots • Pizza (particularly salad pizza, pasta pizza, and Sicilian pizza) • Calzones • Bagels • Soft pretzels

Okay, so by now you are probably thinking that all we did while in New York was eat. To some extent you might be right, but anyone who comes from New York will tell you that there are certain mandatory foods that must be eaten when returning to the Big Apple for a visit. This is a really hard thing to do if you only have a six day visit; considerably harder when you only go for a long weekend, but trust me I have done it. The list is as follows, but I must preface it by saying that there are two reasons for eating these items Reason one; they are not available in San Diego. Reason two is that they are available in San Diego, but taste nothing like they are supposed to. So here is the list. • White Castle Hamburgers • Chinese Food

I have to admit, I didn’t hit the entire list on this trip, but I did pretty well. My daughter told me it just means I have to come back again to finish the rest of my list. An excuse I will definitely not dispute. All in all, I must say, it was the best mother’s day gift I ever received. Not for the food or the trip, but for the opportunity to sit back and watch my daughter as a grown woman with a husband, and in-laws, and a precious Chihuahua/pincher mix named Skillet; all while going back to school for a career change to nursing. I couldn’t help but look over at her and remember the little girl with the blond pigtails who came running into the kitchen to ask for another peanut butter and jelly sandwich because she had put hers into the VCR; she thought it looked hungry. Maybe this trip was all about food.

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A guide for family, friends and loved ones in preparing for the effects of the growing elder population ‌a Public Service from “Those Who Careâ€?

Assisting with Older Adult Transitions As people begin to experience their first phase in transitioning to being an "older adult," they often have the initial sense of relief and optimism toward their future. For example, many working adults actually look forward to retirement, where they will have fewer responsibilities and less stress. The idea of the "golden years" still blooms bright for those folks. Yet, as so often will happen, older adults may not be fully prepared for the actual transitions that lie ahead for them. Issues with physical abilities, social situations, and financial concerns will quickly creep into their daily dialogues, and they are woefully under-educated regarding these soon-to-happen changes. For these "older adults" and their families, the goal (as Averne L. Brandt, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist, in her article Transition Issues for the Elderly and Their Families stated), "is to maximize the positive and develop strategies for coping with the stresses." Ms. Brandt has divided the transition period into two main focal points: 1. Look at change realistically, and 2. Empowering your senior parent. With regard to being realistic about the changes that may be upcoming in your senior's life, there are both physical and emotional issues to contend with. The fact is that as we age our processes slow down. Physical abilities become more restricted (i.e., walking up and down steps becomes more difficult), visual acuity is lessened, and hearing and memory also become less accurate than when the senior was a younger person. Couple these physical changes with the emotional transitions that are occurring, such as a change in role identity (i.e., moving from an important role at work to one of subservient player at home), handling losses (i.e., their job, their friends at work, etc.), and their soon to occur changes in relationships with their children (i.e., from fully responsible parent to having their children begin to be part of their decision making process) all lead to a very difficult transition for both the older adult and their family. To begin the process of assisting your older adult's transition phase, it is important to include the older adult in the process. This is not an "I know what's best for Mom." situation, but rather a "Mom, I'd like to talk with you about my concerns regarding your living situation." As a result of all the losses the older adult has been experiencing over the last several years (and will continue to experience until they pass away), the senior is a walking encyclo-

pedia of learned knowledge about life. The idea is to tap into that knowledge and use it to the older adult's best advantage. Empowering the senior with decision making abilities and ensuring that she is always included in conversations about her future, will give her a sense of control over her own life (even as it transitions away from the life she once knew). For the adult offspring, the plan is to move into these discussions with the right attitude and proper words. As these discussions will most likely be emotionally charged, both with present and past issues, the presentation is all important. Simply talking to mom about where she is going to live will not suffice. The meeting with mom must be planned out well. It is important that you approach this discussion properly: 1. Attitude. You must be having this discussion with mom, not for her. 2. Practice what you would like to say with someone you trust. 3. Plan out what you will say. 4. Plan out what outcome you would like to see come from the meeting. 5. Use "I" statements. This shows mom that the views you state are yours and not just a way to bully her into something she may not want. 6. Accept the fact that mom may not agree with you. 7. Give mom time to think about the discussion and the possible changes that would be in store for her. 8. Keep old issues out of the discussion. 9. Keep the topic straight forward and on target. 10. Only go as far as mom can handle at the moment. Mom may need to take a break or resume the discussion at a later date/time. Remember number 7 above. Transitions are difficult for everyone. Be supportive and you and your loved one will work out the big stuff.


Women and Self-Defense

San Diego

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As a Martial Artist since I was four years old, my true passion is Tae Kwon Do; since 1980 I realized my specialty was teaching. I decided I would like to make a difference in people’s lives through my knowledge, understanding, and communication of martial arts. I have found great fulfillment in my instructional experience and I have been rewarded by the personal successes of the children and adults whom I have influenced. It is my personal mission to inspire others to achieve personal excellence within their chosen profession or passion. Utilizing the values I’ve learned through martial arts to inspire my students to achieve their goals. Its paramount to understand that martial arts is not about hurting others, as acting selfishly to cause pain is the worst thing a martial artist can do. Instead a martial artist is focused on positive change, in which being able to adapt and overcome within any situation is our greatest skill. The best self-defense is based upon: awareness, self-confidence, proper technique and self-discipline. Be aware of your environment and confidently control our personal space. Perfect your techniques and control any emotions or factors that may hinder your ability to properly defend yourself. For example, the current 2014 Miss USA Nia Sanchez, a 4th degree black belt within Tae Kwon Do answered a question dealing with sexual assaults on college campus by stating “Myself, as a fourth degree black belt, I learned from a young age that you need to be confident and be able to defend yourself. And I think that’s something that we should start to really implement for a lot of women.” (www.examiner.com). I also agree with the current Miss USA that confidence and the right type of training can empower any women to act confidently in any situation. Martial arts training allows women to become confident within their environment because they learn to adapt and be aware at all times without even thinking about it; it eventually becomes second nature which in turn translates to confidence. Martial arts have given me so much personal growth within my life that it becomes impossible for me not to share what I’ve learned over the past 40 years

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Photos By GEKARATEPHOTO.com

Want to know how to defend yourself?

“Like” us on Facebook at Anthony Hong Tae Kwon Do or use Promo Code: SDWM to receive two FREE passes for our Women Self Defense Workshop Class. Bring a friend and learn to be aware and safe!

Anthony Hong Tae Kwon Do 12265 Scripps Poway Parkway #106, Poway, CA 92064 Ahtkd.net (858)547-0080


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Beauty and Wellness Advice from the Experts By Lisa Matar We all want to look our best. You don’t need to look far to find news of a new diet trend loaded with unrealistic promises. The Health and Beauty industry is a multi-billion industry in the United States and a lot of companies are looking for a way into your pocket. Unfortunately, many of these companies do not have your health in mind and many of us go along with the madness, abusing our bodies just to achieve the thin look we are desperately craving. San Diego Woman Magazine recently sat down with two prominent San Diego Health and Beauty experts to bring some sense to the matter. How can we look our best without compromising our health? We asked the experts for some tips. Chelsea McLean Casey, is a CoOwner of Three Sister’s Wellness and Yoga Instructor at Mosaic Yoga in Mission Hills. In addition, she is the Model Liaison and Modeling Advisor to Fashion Week San Diego. Her background in modeling serves to be insightful for the models she mentors. She began modeling at the age of 14 and her career started in San Diego then took her to Los Angeles, New York City and Milan, Italy. Sadly, she discovered the industry is wrought with unhealthy dieting practices. “I have witnessed and succumb to numerous eating disorders myself over the years. Starting my modeling career at such a young age led me into a world full of harsh physical criticism and competition. Just imagine being told your hips are too curvy when you are just 14 years old! Consequently, during my teens and early 20s the urge to stay skinny far outweighed the desire to be healthy. Throughout my career I dabbled on and off in anorexia, bulimia, low-fat diets, no-carb diets, veganism, raw food diets, diuretics, legal diet pills, illegal drugs, existing on cigarettes and gum, etc. The competition is so fierce that the desire for young girls to be thin is all-consuming, leading many to unhealthy weight-loss shortcuts”. As a mentor to up-and-coming models who participate in Fashion Week San Diego, her mission is to give these aspiring young women the tools they need to succeed. “Educating models on how to take care of their health and wellbeing is also important to me. I want our models to feel empowered, supported, confident and beautiful”. She feels strongly that people who shine from the inside manifests an attractiveness that is undeniable. It is confidence that sparks an inner light that is in all of us. This is the foundation of Chelsea’s philosophy behind modeling and looking your best. “Someone who shines from the inside out exudes an inner glow that makes the audience not want to take their eyes off them on the runway. That’s what makes a “model” in my opinion, and it’s something that can’t be faked”. Next time you are walking through a room, remember this advice from a top modeling coach. Walk with confidence and wait for heads to turn.

Aparna Ramadurai, Registered Dietitian and owner of VitaLife Nutrition has a long history of counseling people who have special dietary needs. She created the bariatric nutritional program and was the program director at Ximed Center for Medical and Surgical Weight Management in Del Mar, California. There, she worked closely with the medical director of Bariatric Surgery to prepare individuals for successful surgical weight loss. She also organized and facilitated monthly support group meetings to address concerns and find solutions faced by patients. Amongst many other specialties, she currently creates personalized and customizable weight management plans for individuals who want to take the next step in managing their lifestyles better. She is a wellness counselor who utilizes diet, exercise, yoga, meditation and nutrigenomics to help individuals create the healthy lifestyle they are searching for. We asked Aparna, What is your top nutritional advice for women who want to make a commitment to enhance their physique? There are pitfalls women fall into trying to lose a few pounds. “Women tend to eliminate carbs, which make up the building blocks of our cells and are our first source of energy when we exercise. Grains are important sources of many nutrients including dietary fiber and several B vitamins. An important factor to remember is to stay moderate with your carb intake and only choose whole grains that provide multiple health benefits, including weight management and prevention of heart disease”. Curious to know what nutritional strategies she gives her patients who are aiming on healthy weight loss and management? She gives us 5 rules to live by. Rule 1: Never "diet". Follow a healthy and balanced nutrition plan that includes all the major food groups. Question any plan that has you doing anything drastic and that promises "immediate results". Focus on making changes you can stick with for the rest of your life. Rule 2: Eat on time. Do not wait until your hunger levels cause you to make bad food choices. Trying to eat at the same time every day helps eliminate unnecessary snacking. Rule 3: Avoid fast food. They contain too many harmful toxins your body can do without. The levels of saturated fat, trans fat, sodium and refined sugar in fast food causes serious harm to a healthy body. "Convenient", "cheap" and "fast" are not going to nourish you the same way as a meal made with fresh, wholesome ingredients. Rule 4: Drink lots of water. Stay away from carbonated beverages. Soda (including diet sodas) has been proven to strip the body of important vitamins and minerals in addition to causing weight gain. Rule 5: Make 30-40 minutes of daily physical activity a part of your lifestyle. The physical and emotional benefits of exercise are profound and empower you to move in the right direction!


San Diego

Woman

Jaime Victoria Habert Your Best Friend in Real Estate B y

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Unending Benefits: Beyond the Book

By Debbie Storms

Photo Courtesy of Laurenn Baker

Welcome to’ Lae Lae’s World,’ a place of hugs and smiles. Beautifully illustrated books filled with stories that reinforce the positive concepts of life: Lessons children will take with them all through their lives; a collection of interactive books that teach love and respect for animals, the environment, and other people with emphasis on the positive. They discover Lae Lae’s World is a special creation of a world to be encouraged. Children enjoy this interactive program, which makes learning a fun and enjoyable experience. The series is empowering and enhances creativity: A timeless gift. Each book in the collection is written and illustrated by Laurenn

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Prater Baker and includes an interactive story to read, story telling pages and activity pages all based on the simple concept of providing stories that reinforce the positive concepts of life. It was developed for children 2 to 6 years old, the most vulnerable and teachable of all ages. These books are a teaching series about life issues and the situations that children will deal with in their lives as they grow and mature. Laurenn believes “A positive tomorrow depends on the way we raise our children today. Nothing is more important than to love and encourage our children and to support them to grow up as caring, responsible adults.” It was with great pleasure that I spent a few hours with Laurenn on a mild San Diego afternoon. She is a woman of many talents. Her heart is filled with the beauty and compassion she illustrates and writes about in her books. Her work is supported by many professionals who have endorsed her books. The idea of Lae Lae came from watching her grandchildren as they created their world

with friends that only they could see as they played games and told stories about that world. It is a very special place where all things are possible, all people are together, all animals are loved and the world is a happy place to be taken care of. That is a world to be encouraged. Laurenn is working with an advisory committee of educators and child development specialists across the United States to develop a collection that focuses on issues that these professionals deal with in helping children today. She found it important and beneficial to involve focus groups of parents, grandparents and caregivers to include what they want for their children as well. She donates a percentage of her income to animal, environmental and children’s causes. Here in San Diego the cause is Miracle Babies for which she is a Miracle Circle founding member. Lae Lae’s World is a place where children receive unending benefits that stay with them for a lifetime. What a gift! The books teach such values as: • Love and respect for animals • Kindness and tolerance toward those who are different or who are less fortunate • Respect for people from other cultures and backgrounds • Intergenerational respect and caring • Enjoyment and appreciation of a healthy diet and an active life The series begins with Lae Lae’s mission to support all the children of the world, to adopting a pet, learning to cook with her momma (healthy and easy recipes are included in the back of the book), meeting new friends in her neighborhood from another country and culture, planting a garden and tending as it grows, then sharing the vegetables with elderly neighbors, reaching out to a special needs friend and discovering the wonders of the beach and ocean. There are currently 7 books; number 8 is coming out soon and all are sold individually or as a set. Parents and teachers are also supported by notes to address issues in the book in detail. The collection includes an older sister’s blog, Zoe’s Blog, from the real child who was the model for Lae Lae. She talks about her life and issues that will affect the young readers and she invites conversation from children. Lae Lae’s Playground: Join Lae Lae with a membership to her special club where your child can play fun and safe games on the internet; the games co-ordinate with the books. Coloring pages are available for download from the website. For more information visit www.laelae.com or contact Laurenn at artlark17@aol.com


Art Institute A Local Hub for Art Education

With the completion of the new Education Pavilion they will be able to offer a larger curriculum, including classes for adults and teens, which they weren’t able to offer before. The 7,000 square foot building is a work of art in itself, designed by Anne Sneed and featuring additions from other local artisans. Architect Anne Sneed remodels and revamps old buildings. One of her most recognized projects in San Diego is the top floor of the Diamond View Towers, which re-sold last year as the most expensive sale in the area for the year. The developer of Diamond View Towers, Steve Black was the one to bring Lux’s expansion project to Sneed’s attention. “We take existing buildings and work to make them wonderful, with Lux we could have gone in it for function, but we made it beautiful,” says Sneed. “It’s like seeing that funky boyfriend all dressed up.” Sneed worked directly with the team at Lux to discover what type of space would fit them best.

The Education Pavilion features four large classrooms, an artist workshop, a digital workshop and an outdoor garden area. The doors to all the classrooms were created by Noe Design in Solana Beach, the gorgeous teak barn doors have chalkboards on the back to allow for the classes to create their own chalk art on the back. The building comes together in a way that looks like art. “It’s always fun to collaborate with other designers and artists. We wanted barn doors that open everything up,” says Sneed. “Todd Noe says that his masterpiece are these doors, when you look down the hall and see all the doors closed you can see why,” says Reesey. Lux is in the process of greatly expanding the class offering for the public. Adults have an opportunity to take the Studio Series, which is an interactive discussion where adults can sip wine and talk with an artist from the Artists in Residence program as well as the curators. As the education program continues to expand they will also offer classes. For those looking to do family activities Lux offers Family Fridays where families can tour the exhibit and take part in hands on kid’s projects. Sneed, a North County resident, is excited for the chance to take the classes herself and thinks that it will provide a much needed art outlet for the community. "For north county to have an art outlet with Lux's concept is incredible, I love everything about the mission and the function. I love that the kid programs don't just have them doing crafts, but participating in really thoughtful and artsy based projects."

San Diego

“We take the classic museum model and upend it. Instead of focusing on the permanent collection we invite the artist to come and do a project with us that takes usually about a month to six weeks. And then after that the work that they do, which is a commission piece for us, that piece stays as part of an exhibition of usually ten to twelve works. That exhibition shows us kind of a trajectory of their work, and you can see the piece that they create with us as kind of the period at the end of the sentence,” says Director Reesey Shaw. “Then the gallery space will be turned over to the kid’s work that they made in the classroom.”

“We worked with the educational team and with the Board to talk about the kind of space they wanted,” says Sneed. “We wanted to make it clean and gallery like, but still fun for the children.”

Woman

Lux Art Institute recently opened doors to their new education Pavilion. The renovated space will allow for them to become a local art hub. Lux has a unique approach to art; they work to engage visitors in the process of creating art. With their Artist in Residency program they bring internationally recognized artists to do gallery shows where they not only present previous works of art, but also create a new piece - or in some cases a series of pieces - in the gallery. One of the largest parts of Lux’s mission is art education. The Kids-in-Residence program offers summer classes and camps where children can create thoughtful art pieces. The Artist in Residency Program also allows for the artists to work directly with the children, and now with the expansion adults will be able to work with the artists as well.

By Maile Rudebusch

The museum quality lighting in the Education Pavilion will highlight the works of art created by the children. It will give them a chance to be featured as an artist in a museum setting. “The reason that our program is so successful and so extraordinary is that the kids were inspired by these world class international artists that just knock your socks off. All of us as adults and of course the kids get to be inspired by these fabulous people,” says Reesey. For more information visit their site at http://www.luxartinstitute.org/

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Women Role Models 2014 By Lizzy Marples Objectifying a woman is making her an object of sexual desire instead of a human being with feelings. The second wave of feminism arose in the 60’s and women finally started to emerge from the social roles that men had placed on them. These social norms/roles included the ideology that woman could only be housewives and nothing more. This second feminist movement was great progress for empowering women. However, media was growing right alongside the movement and took this empowerment and made it into something exactly the opposite of empowering: Notice that the majority of the products women became objectified on were products that men use such as; beer, cigars, and cologne. When large corporations realized that sex sells, you start to see women becoming only a sum of their body parts in all type of media. Keeping that in mind, imagine how seeing these “perfect” women in advertisements, and how they are portrayed as less than men, could affect the way young women value themselves and their morals. Being a young women growing up in this social media craved generation, I have been affected first hand. Social media has become a filter for people’s lives, to show only what the majority wants to see. When I see Kylie Jenners tweet about getting a brand new Range Rover and then scroll through her Instagram only to see how happy she looks I begin to think that one must have what she has in order to be happy. Instead of looking up to women like Michelle Obama, who is a graduate of Princeton and devotes her life to helping other people. Teens look up to Miley Cyrus who is all over the media and looks like she’s having the time of her life. Since finishing my project I have redefined my role models and encourage other young women to do the same. There are so many empowering women out there who are happy and contributing to the world in positive ways. My top four are: Jennifer Lawrence - Actress who began her career in Winter's Bone. The media called her fat and she was told to lose weight for one of her roles, but she refused because she didn’t want to conform to the typical super skinny actress role JK Rowling - British Author who basically created a whole empire off her Harry Potter series Sheryl Sandburg - Chief Operating Officer of Facebook Cindy Sherman - Photographer/Artist/Model/ Director whose art portrays women living in this society A couple weeks ago I began a project exploring the second wave of feminism and the affect the movement had on society. At the beginning of this project my teacher asked me what women I looked up to. I stared blankly back at him, not sure what women I thought were my role models. This raised a whole set of questions in my mind because It’s not that I don’t look up to people, I just realized in that moment that I am probably not looking up to the right ones. I found myself aspiring to be certain people for their looks and not their accomplishments. Have you ever noticed the way ads use bodies to sell their products, portraying women as the weaker ones, making them the sum of their bodies?

Shailene Woodley - Starring in the upcoming film A Fault in Our Stars, Shailene was asked if she was feminist and said no, which caused lots of controversy. But instead of fighting the media she clarified saying “For me the big thing in life is about sisterhood,” she says. “Bringing sisters together and supporting one another…What I found so funny and so sad about that article is that I talked about that the entire time. Nothing is going to change in this world until women start loving other women. I’m so lucky. I have the best sisters in my life. The best.”


Lines in the Sand With her personal life in ruins, her professional life wasn’t doing much better. One of her companies was in the midst of a multi-million dollar lawsuit with a huge global company. Any one of these things would make a person crumble, but Annie knew she had to re-imagine and re-create her life. She said, “The great poet Rumi once said, ‘Set your life on fire.’ Rumi would be proud, I was all in!” Annie began the journey of moving forward with great courage and determination. She explains, “Building a house from the ground up was never on my list of things to do. As a matter of fact I had never even given any thought to doing such a thing. GOD had other plans for me and who was I to argue with the big guy. I was so broken from a failed relationship that my heart literally ached. My business partner and I were supposed to be in Minneapolis, in the middle of freezing cold winter, meeting with attorneys in two weeks to continue our David and Goliath legal battle. I didn't even have a coat, let alone anything else to wear. I lost almost everything I owned in the fire.” Annie viewed these experiences as a gift. She continues, "I decided to simply be with the loss and heartache. As humanly challenging as it was, I elected to accept all that each moment brought to me as if I had chosen it for myself. I was still; often. I went on walks; many. I lived moment to moment and realized that being happy and healed and safe was all a matter of choice. As the days, months, and now years passed I learned a lot...about myself, about others, about life and about love. Along the way (thou-

sands of magazine pages, a bunch of books, a seminar here and there, the support of friends and family and absolute determination) I created Lines in the Sand: A 10 Step Invitation to Be Your Authentic Self. I created it because I want to help others live an authentic life...a life that is extraordinary...a life worth living.” There are many programs out there taught by doctors, psychologists and professors, but no one can understand the total devastation of such severe loss better than someone who lived through it and came back stronger and better than ever. Annie Fonte has done so. Her Lines in the Sand Program takes a year to complete and includes the following ten lines:

“Lines in the Sand will be a challenging and invigorating journey. There will be hard questions that demand answers that are honest and certain. There will be moments of sadness and of great joy. There will be ‘ah ha’ moments and times when you will want to close the book and put it on a shelf, never to return to its pages. You will recognize things about yourself that you don’t much care for and you will discover things that you would have never imagined...good things, grand things: LIFE giving things.” Annie’s group is a small intimate gathering of about 10 people and the sessions convene in a private barn where they take part in a life changing year-long journey. They spend time in nature, mingling with horses and in the company of a few great dogs. “For six hours once a month we gather to explore, restore and reunite with our true essence…we imagine, design and dare to live an authentic life filled with joy and appreciation. We courageously become our real self. We get a little dust on our boots, we shed a few tears and we laugh…a lot” For those who do not reside in San Diego, or for some reason cannot physically attend the meetings, Lines in the Sand will be available online starting September 2014, allowing Annie to help even more people. I asked Annie, what was one of the most important things she learned from the experience of losing her house? “It is a very humbling experience to watch your house burn to the ground. I never felt like a fire "victim" and it was an identity that I didn't embrace. I was fortunate to have my dogs with me, and my three horses made it through the blazing night like champions. I looked at it as a cleansing experience. I didn't have to decide what I wanted to keep and what I wanted to get rid of. Mother Nature handled that part. She decided everything must go with the exception of me and my animals. I quickly came to the conclusion that all that was lost were things. With the exception of a few keepsakes everything could be replaced. The process of rebuilding took two years. In the course of those two years a tremendous amount of renewal ensued. I learned that I could live without those "things". I learned that what I had was enough. I learned the freedom of letting go. I managed to find quiet moments in the chaos and that "home" isn't a place, it is a way of being....and, Lines in the Sand rose out of those ashes. For more information visit Annie M. Fonte’s site at www.meetmeatthebarn. com.

San Diego

The date was Monday October 22, 2007 at 4:30 pm, a moment that will forever be frozen in Annie’s mind. It was the moment that her home in Rancho Santa Fe, California burned to the ground. If this wasn’t bad enough, at the same time the fifteen year relationship she had been in was also "going up in flames."

Line One: Be Authentic Line Two: View Every Experience as a Gift Line Three: Quiet Yourself So You Can Hear the Whisper of Destiny Line Four: Embrace & Practice Surrender Line Five: Astonish Yourself Every Day Line Six: Do Right, Not Be Right Line Seven: Be Impeccably Fiscally Disciplined Line Eight: Live Graciously Line Nine: Simply Be, Be Simply Line Ten: Leave a Dent

Woman

When your life falls apart in front of your eyes, what gives you the strength to lift yourself up and start all over again? This was the question I had to ask Annie M. Fonte, founder of a wonderful new program called Lines in the Sand.

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A PERUVIAN AMAZON ADVENTURE By Gerald M. Neff

By far the largest in water volume and the longest river in the world, the Amazon is the world class Queen of fluvial waters: Named after the savage arrow shooting female warriors, this majestic river snakes two thousand miles inland through Brazil and to the north-east frontier of Peru. The Ama-

personalities that always seem to congregate in this historic monument. They have air-conditioning and can be found in the main square and along the main thoroughfare of El Prospero Street. You can also choose the modern cruise boats. The host takes you from the airport in an air conditioned bus directly to the air conditioned ambiance of the luxury cruisers with such names as The Delfin I, Delfin II, La Amatista or other high end cruise boats: Complete with fifteen to twenty air conditioned cabins and classy bar. This includes a tour of four days and five nights for families and assorted tour groups to visit the attractions. For those vacationing alone or with family in Iquitos and staying in one of the various hotels, a visit to the river wharf will tell you what trips and tours are available on a local basis to go up river to Nauta or down river to Peevas or Tabatinga. A number of fifteen to twenty passengers size boats with quiet out boards - so as not to frighten away the fauna – are reasonable priced and negotiable for the day tours. However, my favorite trips are on the beautiful three tiered Mississippi style river boats of approximately eighty to a hundred and twenty feet long. Complete with saloon, bar, dining room, beds and at times a hammock. And with a wonderful variety of local and international personalities you are never bored. On this trip you see the same sights as the more expensive luxurious cruises, and it is just as exciting. These tours are negotiable at the hotels or with the boat captain.

50 zon River is so wide here, at the port of Iquitos, that you can barely see the other side. It is navigable by ocean going vessels to Iquitos, carrying raw petroleum for the Peruvian refinery. These ships must turn around here and pick up international cargo as they return down river to the Atlantic Ocean. Within this river (and hundreds of feeder streams) are literally tens of thousands of animals and birds not found anywhere else in the world. The pink and gray porpoise or dolphin can be seen jumping in and out of the waters and even following the boats. The Amazon Basin was once an inland ocean and is teeming with all sorts of wild creatures, exotic fish and flora. The piranhas are found in the side streams and must be respected, but are easily caught with any bait. Careful now! You could lose your favorite fingers; two people are needed to unhook these nasty needle toothed critters. This means, one to tightly hold the slippery fish and the other to remove the hook. They are delicious but too many bones for my taste. With almost two thousand varieties of birds available in Peru, the majority are found in the Peruvian Amazon Basin which includes the adjoining Pacaya-Shamira National Reserve that has an unbelievable number of herons, finches, toucans, red and blue macaws, eagles, and kites. There are also tree sloths, dozens of types of monkeys, snakes and, if you are lucky, some evening or early morning you might see a tapir or otorongo (that is a jungle Leopard of 180 to 250 pounds) rambling around. The city of Iquitos is quite clean, washed daily by rain; its unique architecture resembles the antique New Orleans style. You can find the original cast iron Round House built by Gustav Eiffel which was shipped up river during the glory days of the rubber boom. The Round House's present proprietor is a British ex-patriot who calls himself the extra official British Consul of the Amazon. This interesting pub and restaurant is a must see watering hole to eat and have a drink with a variety of foreign and local

The area has a number of tree top canopy tours for the Eco-enthusiasts and are located several hours by boat up or down river. Usually advanced reservations are required for groups of fifteen to thirty persons in a planned site with screened in breeze cooled cabins or air conditioning. A swimming pool is (normally) provided. The big attraction is the high bridges in the canopies of tall trees to observe the flora and fauna in the early morning and evenings. This is interlaced with tours into the jungle and exploration by boat or canoe. An endless combination of tours and transportation with promised ports of call, animals and aquatic life, complete with exotic plants and birds are yours for the choosing. It is the opportunity of a lifetime. Tourism in the Peruvian Amazon is a year-round activity with the monsoons from December through May and high waters abating by August: Any time is favorable for the river tours., Remember, it rarely rains all day long, so there is always time to see the sights and enjoy all that the local area has to offer. In fact I have been enjoying this for many years, so it is your turn to go south to make some fine memories and enjoy yourself.

Buen Viaje !!!

Bon Voyage!!!


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San Diego

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