Welcome to "The Mill"

APOCALYPSE NOT P.6 DRINKING ETHANOL P.8 LOST IN PARADISE P.28

SANTA BARBARA

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WELCOME TO “THE MILL”

MIX INCLUDES BREWERY, WINERY, RESTAURANTS, AND MORE...

IT’S CALLED THE HALEY STREET CORRIDOR AND WITH THE NEAR COMPLETION OF DARRELL AND KIRSTEN BECKER’S MILL PROJECT, THE TRANSFORMATION OF THE AREA BOUNDED BY LAGUNA STREET ON THE WEST AND MILPAS ON THE EAST IS TAKING SHAPE. (STORY BEGINS ON PAGE 14)

SOUP’S ON! PAGE 12

Grappolo’s Leonardo Curti, Ballard Inn’s Budi Kazali, and Bethany Markee featured at Annual Chefs in the Park event in Los Olivos

OH HI, OJAI PAGE 18

With a visit to warm and welcoming Rancho Inn and Chief’s Peak, you’ll be in touch with Mother Nature and out of touch with everything else

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Content

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S haron’s Take – Sharon Byrne attends an SB City Council Finance Committee meeting and proceeds to scrutinize the city’s budget and district elections

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T he Bi-weekly Capitalist – To paraphrase the band R.E.M., it isn’t the end of the world as we know it – so Jeffrey Harding explains why Chicken Little was aptly named and there’s no apocalypse

P.7

L etters – Tina Lorge praises Jeffrey Harding and Santa Barbara; William Lockwood on the Dolphin Fountain; “Wallace” gets to the art of it all; and a photo of Pulitzer Prize winner Rob Kuznia

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Beer Guy – Zach Rosen peers into ethanol to analyze its fermentation, taste, and impact on one’s health

The Fortnight – From The Carol Burnett Show to a prehistoric horror-shark the size of a freight train. A Fortnight for every persuasion.

James Petrucci – The artist has captured the mysterious and gorgeous Spark of Life in his art. Stop the presses, Jeff Wing insists.

RUE SANTA BARBARA LIFESTYLE

SY Valley Snapshot – Eva Van Prooyen tips her cooking cap to Chefs in the Park in Los Olivos, and acknowledges Firestone Walker’s heavy medals, Quick Silver Ranch’s mini ponies, and the upcoming Jazz & Olive Festival

P.14 Live the Santa Barbara lifestyle in this elegant and fun downtown location. Enjoy your own courtyard as well as the amazing community courtyard. With approx. 2,600 sq.ft., offering approx. 12-foot ceilings, custom made floor tiles, air conditioning, and two closets in each en suite bedroom, this is truly Santa Bonnymede Pied a Terre Barbara at its best. The guest Bonnymede Pied abeach Terre dyllic Montecito bedroom has its own offi ce or Pied a Terre just steps to the dyllic Montecito beach parlor andbeach, is accessible from Four Seasons Biltmore Pied a Terre just steps to the and distance to all the restaurants beach, Four Seasons Biltmore it’s walking own entrance.

The two-car and shops Montecito has to offer.

This and walking distance to all the restaurants garage is within the compound single bedroom 1.5 bath also features and shops Montecito has to offer. Thisa and isroom accessible bywindow elevator toEnjoy dining with full view. single bedroom 1.5abath also features a thepool, residence. the spa and as well asview. quietEnjoy dining room withtennis a full window walks on spa the and beach.

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Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission.

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Real Estate – James Buckley covers ample territory to provide updates about The Mill project; he catches up with Darrell and Kirsten Becker, Potek Winery’s David Potter, and Julienne’s Justin and Emma-Claire West, among other faces in SB’s business world

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American Girl – Tommie Vaughn gets in touch with nature, primarily around the Ojai Rancho Inn, created by Chris Sewell and Kenny Osehan

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Man About Town – Mark Léisuré chronicles films in focus, Cinema Society, SBIFF and Carol Marshall, A Trip to the Moon at Plaza Playhouse, upcoming Academy Awards, and American Dance & Music

Cinema Scope – James Luksic partakes of The Water Diviner, follows Hot Pursuit, and climbs aboard The D Train

Girl About Town – Julie Bifano is more like a lady about town, observing Ladies’ Day Out at the Santa Barbara Public Market

Made in SB – Kateri Wozny is hangin’ 10 with the Santa Barbara Cutting Board Company and its owner, Joel Hoffmann

Food File – Christina Enoch keeps it short and sweet, getting her groove on at Outpost restaurant, courtesy of chef Derek Simcik, in Goleta

Up Close – A three-hour tour: Jacquelyn De Longe cruises to the Channel Islands including Santa Cruz, exploring the landmass that doubles as a national park and nature conservancy

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Plan B – Ready “oar” not, here comes Briana Westmacott, rowing about Channel Islands while getting to know The Friendship Paddle, including John McFadden

I Heart SB – Elizabeth Rose relays a not-so-romantic tale about lust at first sight, followed by texting and sexting that gets out of hand in short order.

Who says romance is dead?

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take

by Sharon Byrne Sharon’s education in engineering and psychology gives her a distinctive mix of skills for writing about and working on quality-of-life, public safety and public policy issues. Her hyper-local SB View column can be found every other week.

Who Watches the City’s Finances?

With District Elections, Good Question

I

was at the City Council Finance Committee meeting May 12. You might be tempted to think it would be a total snore, but it was fascinating, actually. Council member Dale Francisco chairs it ably, and Bendy White and Gregg Hart round out the committee. We’re in the city’s budget cycle at present, so this is the time when everyone comes round with hand extended, seeking to be a line item in the budget. It’s also the time when staff proposes fee increases or other measures to close budget gaps for various departments and enterprise funds.

The three-member committee listens to the proposals, and brings these back to city council for full report. You can see a couple of interesting things here.

One, certain beloved organizations will approach the city, seeking supplemental funding for their operations, and in

the right political conditions, obtain it, without much public scrutiny. Casa Esperanza requested $125,000 as an ongoing city budget allocation. They had been given $125,000 in the last budget cycle as a one-time aid. Now they seek to make that permanent. In previous years, when they were a sacred cow in these parts, the permanent allocation every year would have been a slam dunk. With the current council make-up, that’s not so certain.

The second interesting thing that happened at the meeting was that the three-member committee had asked to see a presentation on budget reserves, and wanted to explore options on what can be done to restore them.

At the committee’s request, staff looked back over 20 years to see how reserves have been managed.

City reserves are important. Just as

a household or business needs to keep some funds in reserve in case of emergencies, so do cities. Recessions can cause a city’s revenue receipts to drop dramatically. Emergencies may necessitate the use of reserve funds.

A healthy balance here ensures a city can navigate troubled times. Moody’s likes to see a minimum of 5 percent of a city’s annual revenues. Standard & Poor will give a city the highest credit rating of AAA if their reserve balance is 25 percent of revenues. When it comes to financing needed capital projects, that credit rating is key. So you can see why a strong reserve balance is in a city’s best interest.

Looking at the graph, during the boom years of the mid-2000s, when dot coms were launching by the minute, and you could get a job paying $100,000 per year if you could spell Internet, the city council spent down the reserves from a high of about 30 percent of the city’s annual budget, to a low of about 15 percent.

Then the crash of 2008 hit.

Since 2010, due to strong fiscal management efforts, the reserve balance has ticked steadily upward, though it still falls short of the city’s required reserves by $4.3 million.

Why is this important? The three

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ordinance committee members are the last of their kind – elected at large, with the city’s best interests in mind.

Starting this November, we will elect council members by district, and that will introduce a new dynamic.

Council members in district systems are typically more interested in ensuring their district receives the maximum benefits from the city as possible, while shifting the burdens to the city at-large.

This will be good for districts, but could lead to poor outcomes for the city overall. In a world where the Finance Committee is made up of competing district councilmembers, who will look out for the overall fiscal health of the city? That burden will likely fall to staff. Electeds come and go, remember, but staff stays. Given that staff has to respond to the direction of city council, it’s going to be difficult for them to stand up to their bosses, so to speak, and try to get them to keep the larger city’s health in mind as part of good governance.

Finance committee might not be the most exciting thing on your radar of things to pay attention to, but it’s key. Citizens need to pay attention to the overall condition of the city and its finances, so as to ensure we’ve got backup for the bad times, if and when they occur.

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Bi-Weekly Capitalist

by Jeff Harding

Jeff Harding is a real estate investor and a writer on economics and finance. He is the former publisher of the Daily Capitalist, a popular economics blog. He is also an adjunct professor at SBCC.

The Coming Apocalypse

O

kay, the headline of this article was a cheap trick to lure you in. The proper title should be “The Coming Apocalypse – Not!” or something like that. What prompted me to write about apocalypse was Elon Musk. But more on him later.

Here’s the truth about popular concepts of apocalypses: they are bunk.

I’m not talking about God’s justice here or even zombies. I’m talking about the popular misconceptions of dire consequences of population growth and the scarcity of resources. As Santa Barbara’s own Cassandra, Garrett Hardin, put it: the problem is not about the shortages of things, but rather the “longages” of population. He was wrong.

The doomsayers claim food production and resources cannot possibly keep up with population growth and that will lead to starvation, poverty, war, and death on a mass scale. This is not a new idea. It goes way back. The concept is known as Malthusianism, after Robert Malthus, an 18th-century English economist and moralist. In 1798, he wrote An Essay on the Principle of Population. It basically says that production grows mathematically but population grows geometrically, and production can never keep up with population. That equals perpetual starvation.

The only problem with his conclusion is that he was not just wrong, but spectacularly wrong. One way to prove this is to look at life expectancy in the United Kingdom. If people are starving,

life expectancy is short. If people live longer, it means they are thriving. From about 1800, when Malthus made his dire observation, people’s life spans began to grow, dramatically so.

Why was Malthus wrong? Did population slow down and that left more food for those remaining? No, population grew, doubling in the next 50 years. Oops.

Malthus made a fundamental error by thinking that production and resources are finite. In fact, production and resources are infinite. Because of human ingenuity, free-market capitalism, the drive of entrepreneurs and technology, production and resources expand to meet the needs of the population. That’s what capitalism does.

You would think that in the light of reality that Malthusian concepts would go the way of the Wooly Mammoth, but they persist to today. The aforementioned Hardin (1915-2003), a well-known professor at UCSB, was a major advocate of Malthusianism.

He issued the same warnings about population as Malthus. His essay, The Tragedy of the Commons concludes that people make bad choices based on selfinterest and that endangers the planet and society as a whole. The planet’s resources have limits, he argued.

Hardin’s apocalyptic vision of the future never happened. Hardin failed to understand capitalism. Free-market capitalism has produced the greatest explosion of wealth and well-being in history. He was widely criticized and debunked by economists such as Nobel

Prize winner Elinor Ostrom and Julian Simon.

I should point out there was a nasty side to Malthus and Hardin. Both advocated eugenics, sterilization, and other heavy-handed methods to limit population growth. Hardin was criticized for being soft on warfare and famine – things regrettable according to Malthusians but helpful to control population.

Paul Ehrlich became famous for his 1968 book, The Population Bomb. He sang the same song as Malthus and Hardin, and predicted massive starvation in the 1970s and 1980s (hundreds of millions). He singled out India as an example of overpopulation and predicted increasing starvation there.

While India’s population has grown 300 percent since Ehrlich wrote his book (now about 1.2 billion), starvation and malnutrition have declined from about 90 percent in 1949 to about 17 percent today (according to the Global Hunger Index).

Why was Ehrlich wrong? Again, he

Because of human ingenuity, free-market capitalism, the drive of entrepreneurs and technology, production and resources expand to meet the needs of the population failed to understand the economics of India’s problems. After independence, it turned to socialism and five-year plans under Nehru and Gandhi, whose policies kept India poor and hungry. The green revolution (technology – highyield rice hybrids) and the slow move away from a Soviet-style socialist model to capitalism are solving the problem.

Today, we don’t see famines in capitalist, market-based economies. Starvation only exists in poor socialist countries.

Let me give you an additional good example of modern Malthusianism.

Remember “Peak Oil”? This is a concept that says oil production will peak at some time and then decline, and the process is irreversible, and we will eventually run out of oil. Early estimates said that would occur in 1970. Recently, the bar has been moved up to 2020.

The reality is that we have no clue when oil production will peak and then decline. Can anyone tell me: Where all the oil in the earth is located?

What the future demand for oil will be?

What the costs of production will be in the future?

What the price of oil will be, in a year, in a decade, in a century?

What technologies will be used in the future to extract, produce, and use oil?

All these factors will determine oil production, and they can’t be predicted.

None of the peak oil proponents predicted the recent boom in oil production in the U.S., which led to a worldwide oil glut, causing a halving of oil prices and reduced production.

Folks, we’re not going to run out of oil. If we do, then in that misty far-off future, we won’t need oil because we’ll have some other energy source. That’s what capitalism is all about. If you want it, some entrepreneur will figure out how to produce it, and competition will keep the price affordable.

Which brings me back to Elon Musk of Tesla fame.

Mr. Musk has solved a problem: solar cells can’t produce electricity at night.

Excess daytime power produced by solar cells can’t be stored and thus is streamed into the grid. The solution is Mr. Musk’s new Tesla Powerwall home battery, which will be able to store power from your solar cells.

During the day, solar cells charge the Powerwall battery, which provides power at night. This means you can have an uninterruptable power supply in your home driven completely by clean solar energy. All off the grid, if you wish. This is sci-fi stuff. It’s not perfect, but entrepreneurs like Mr. Musk and capitalists eager to invest in new technologies, will eventually make it so.

Did the Peak oilers predict this?

Julian Smith was an American economist who countered the concepts of Malthus and his modern followers.

His 1981 book, The Ultimate Resource showed that resources are infinite. What he meant by that is that the free-market pricing mechanism drives technology, which is wielded by entrepreneurs to create more resources. If there is a scarcity of something people want (food, a commodity), then higher prices will incentivize entrepreneurs to figure out new ways of producing it.

Even if we did run out of something, new resources and technologies would emerge to solve that problem. This assumes that governments don’t put barriers in the way of progress; that would cause us to run out of resources.

Population, rather than a curse, is a blessing because in capitalist societies it encourages entrepreneurs, it drives change, and improves our lives. We will never run out of food or resources. This is the story of free-market capitalism.

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Letters

Although you might not believe it, we actually want to hear from you. So if you have something you think we should know about or you see something we've said that you think is cretinous (or perspicacious, to be fair), then let us know. There's no limit on words or subject matter, so go ahead and let it rip to: Santa Barbara Sentinel, Letters to the Editor, 133 East De La Guerra Street, No. 182, Santa Barbara, California 93101. You can also leap into the 21st century and email us at tim@santabarbarasentinel.com.

Add Dan Encell to your team of trusted advisors!

No Place Like Home

T

he May 2-16 edition was a great one. I especially want to compliment Jeff Harding, who writes so well on economic and financial stuff, but who turned his mind this time to rhapsodizing about Santa Barbara — surely one of the most beautiful cities in the U.S. We had been driving through, with occasional weekends, for many years until we finally couldn’t resist the lure any longer, pulled up stakes in alsobeautiful Laguna Beach, and moved here.

And Jeff, do you ever tire of looking at those glorious mountains, with the homes spilling down their sides, and the palms and pines that grace the freeway through town? What a town!

Tina Lorge Montecito

Fountain of Yuck

Nestled in the embrace of a rugged mountain range and flanked by golden beaches with towering palm trees, the Dolphin Fountain at the foot of State Street beckons the adventurer in all of us to visit the archipelago of uninhabited islands across the shimmering blue channel. As such, it is the cynosure of one of the most photogenic locations on the entire south coast.

A transient, however, has recently been commandeering one of the public benches encircling the fountain by scattering his unsightly camping paraphernalia on and about it. He then pesters the steady stream of passing tourists and shuttle bus passengers for money with a large cardboard sign. All of which brings shame and disrepute upon our fair city.

Years ago, a number of public picnic tables were placed along Chase Palm park for the convenience of families.

Groups of transients, however, soon appropriated them as their day-time hang-outs. The problem was solved by summarily removing those picnic tables – a solution that suggests itself regarding those public benches around our beloved Dolphin Fountain.

Sincerely, William G. Lockwood Santa Barbara

The Art of the Matter

I heart SB... I truly do. But guys [such as the one in] that last article (“The Boy Who Would Never Grow Up,” I Heart

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SB, Sentinel #4/9) make me hurl.

Beverly Hills penthouse... Playboy models... casino.. and finally a big house on the Riviera! Please spare me your obvious proverbial silver-spoon lifestyle with no edge whatsoever...

Zzzzzzzzz... Okay, I got that out. Now to create some art!

Wallace is Art Santa Barbara (Elizabeth Rose responds: First of all, we’re so glad you heart SB. It hearts you right back! Second of all, I can understand the frustrations of reading a “proverbial silver-spoon lifestyle with no edge,” but clichés are clichés for a reason – they’re real and true. And in this story in particular. The doctor in question, bless his heart, can’t pretend to not make boo-koos of moolah and afford the luxuries he worked so hard – a decade in medical school, internships, and residency – to get. I guess what they say is true: more money, more problems.

But there I go again with another cliché.

Regardless, thanks for your feedback! We would love to hear a love story featuring a big-time artist in Santa Barbara.

Know anyone? – E.R.)

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Shown here at Alta Verde in Santa Barbara’s Funk Zone, is Rob Kuznia, winner of the 2015 Pulitzer Prize for local reporting, and his longtime friend Justin Dullum. Mr. Kuznia, came to Santa Barbara to celebrate his Pulitzer win, his recent wedding to longtime girlfriend Alta Peterson, and the birthday of Justin’s wife, May O’Mahoney. He and his wife are currently living in the L.A. area.

Daniel Encell Director, Estate Division Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Call: (805) 565-4896 DanEncell@aol.com Visit: www.DanEncell.com

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Drinking Ethanol

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Discovering Fermentation

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lcohol is the second most commonly used recreational drug worldwide.

Caffeine is number one, though I think an argument could be made that in this day and age sugar can be used rather recreationally, which would make it number one by a longshot. We usually use the term alcohol to refer to drinking alcohol; however, this is a large group of organic compounds. In organic chemistry you can identify these alcoholic compounds by the suffix -ol.

Methanol, ethanol, propanol, etc., are types of alcohol. Ethanol is the one that is safe for humans to drink and people have been drinking it for thousands of years.

Santa Barbara

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– Cheers, Bob, Betty & Dennis Hours: Mon-Sat from 11-7, Closed Sundays 3849 State St. in La Cumbre Plaza • (805) 845-5247

Humans have been aware of the process of fermentation for thousands of years, but it was not until Louis Pasteur’s work with microbiology in the 19th century that we began to understand what was causing this process. For most of human history, people simply could not imagine living organisms that were so small they could not be seen by the eye.

When Anton van Leeuwenhoek first observed yeast under a microscope in 1680, he could tell it was composed of tiny, linked elements, but he had no idea that they were alive. In 1789, Antoine-Laurent Lavoisier identified that fermentation was the process of sugar being converted into ethanol and carbon dioxide (think beer bubbles).

Yeast was considered a byproduct of this process, and no one made the connection between fermentation and yeast.

For thousands of years, fermentation was thought to be a holy or magical process. Barm is the foamy mixture of protein and yeast that rises to the surface of the liquid during fermentation and can be used to inoculate the next batch of beer. In the Dark Ages, the English referred to barm as godisgoode or goddes good and revered it as coming from the grace of God. It was not until Louis Pasteur’s famous swan-neck flask experiment in the mid1800s that yeast was identified as being “biological” and alive. Pasteur was using wine in the experiment since it was better suited for the laboratory setup, but the problem he was trying to figure out was why beer got “sick.”

The vodka from Cutler’s Artisan Spirits perfectly reflects the natural flavor of ethanol

Tasting Ethanol

Fermentation as the process of converting sugar into ethanol and carbon dioxide is the overall reaction.

On paper, this looks simple – though there are many intermediary steps and different factors that affect the process.

Brewers don’t actually brew beer, they brew wort, which is the sugary liquid that acts as a feedstock for yeast. Similar to how certain foods and ingredients can agree or disagree with a person’s specific metabolism, different kinds of yeasts have different metabolisms and preferred diets.

Malted barley is the primary source of sugars and other carbohydrates in beer. A typical wort will contain a blend of sugars such as maltose, fructose, and glucose, and unfermentable carbohydrates such as dextrins and glucans. Through the brewing process and the ingredients used, the brewer can influence the exact makeup of sugars and carbohydrates. Just like when humans have an unhealthy diet, if the yeast is not given the proper diet, it will get “sick.” None of these “sick” compounds are harmful to humans, but they do have undesirable aromas such as nail polish, apple cider, or creamed corn.

Ethanol is commonly said to be flavorless; this is incorrect. It has a naturally soft sweetness to it that can be best observed in vodka. Beer, wine, and spirits typically have hundreds to thousands of different types of compounds in them. The extensive distillation that vodka undergoes means that it is almost a pure water-ethanol mixture (or at least should be depending on the quality). The best example of the flavor of ethanol I have found happens to come from our own area. Cutler’s Artisan Spirits Vodka perfectly blends the powdered sugar flavor and chestwarming nature of ethanol.

As previously mentioned, beer contains hundreds of different compounds (about 800). While ethanol

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Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

has its own flavor, this subtle taste is not normally noticeable in beer because of the much stronger flavor effects of the other compounds. The greatest character directly related to ethanol in beer is the chest-warming quality, though ethanol plays a much greater role in the flavor of beer. Think about how water and oil do not mix. This is largely because water is a polar compound and oils are non-polar.

Ethanol has a unique chemistry that combines a non-polar chain (C2H5) with a polar hydroxyl (-OH) functional group that allows it to interact with both water-soluble and fat-soluble compounds. This property influences the perception of aromatic compounds which means that ethanol changes the flavor of beer. This effect has limited the flavors possible in non-alcoholic beers since ethanol is not present. While this effect has been observed, it is difficult to measure or predict how the perception of individual compounds are influenced by ethanol due to the complexity of perception, and this effect remains somewhat mysterious to scientists.

drinking. Most of our opinions that alcohol causes liver failure, cancer, malnutrition, heart diseases and so forth are based off of research that was looking only at the effects of alcoholism.

It was not until the French Paradox was observed in the 1980s that we began to re-evaluate our opinions on alcohol consumption. The French Paradox identified that the French people have a low incidence of coronary heart disease (CHD) and attributed this statistic to the high-fat diet and consumption of red wine. There is still some debate on this study, but since then there has been renewed interest in the role of ethanol in good health and it is now thought that the low incidence of CHD is caused by ethanol and is not specific to red wine.

Of course, there are exceptions but generally speaking the harmful health effects of ethanol only occur with excessive drinking. So what is excessive? Doctors recommend one to three drinks per day, depending on the person. It has been observed that up to five drinks per day causes the low CHD effect, though another general populous statistic study found that more than three drinks daily saw an overall lower life expectancy, hence the recommendation to keep it three drinks or under. A drink is defined differently in each country, but generally as a 12-ounce bottle of 5% ABV beer, a 5-ounce glass of 12% ABV wine, or a 1.5-ounce measure of 40-percent ABV liquor.

9

Beerdoes like to drink beer, and admittedly sometimes to excess. Over the past year or two, session beers have become a new trend and these low-alcohol (about 3-4% ABV) brews allow people to have a few more rounds without risking their health or becoming over-intoxicated. Most of them are in the IPA category, but some brewers are starting to branch out. A few of the more notable session beers are the citrus-themed Easy Jack IPA from Firestone Walker Brewing Co. or the more spicy, pine-like Go To IPA from Stone Brewing Co. Whichever poison you choose, ethanol is a significant part of our culture and will continue to entice mankind for years to come.

Weekly Happenings in Santa Barbara:

E D N A R G O Y O R AR OPENING LATE JUNE!!

Drinking to Your Health

The special chemistry of ethanol also gives it some unique biological properties. The non-polar chain makes ethanol cross cell membranes by passive diffusion with ease. This makes ethanol useful for transporting nutrients into the body. From the beginning of civilization in Sumer, medicinal herbs and spices were steeped in beer and wine and administered as medicine. Up until fairly recently, ethanol was one of the preferred solvents for medicine.

Since the introduction of age limits on drinking in the 20th century, alcohol as a medicinal solvent has become regulated for fear of children using it recreationally. This is why cough syrups no longer have alcohol in them. Now, fillers and other chemicals are used to replace the role of ethanol as a solvent in medicine.

During prohibition and the surrounding eras, the world as a whole was having a significant drinking problem. This fueled a lot of research into the health effects of excessive

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MAY 16 - 29

by Jeff Wing

Tell us all about your art opening, performance, dance party, book signing, sale of something we can’t live without, or event of any other kind by emailing fortnight@santabarbarasentinel.com. If our readers can go to it, look at it, eat it, or buy it, we want to know about it and will consider it for inclusion here.

Special consideration will be given to interesting, exploratory, unfamiliar, and unusual items. We give calendar preference to those who take the time to submit a picture along with their listing.

Loose Morals of the Story

H

ello, friends. Hello. Let me take just a moment to hold forth on what I see as the moral tailspin our fair town has entered, a powered descent which no amount of joystick-tugging is likely to arrest. Until recently, Santa Barbara’s young ladies dressed like Melissa or Melinda or whatever her name was on Little House on the Prairie? Tea gowns and whale-bone corsets were the fashion order of the day, and a squashed little bonnet on the head.

Now they sashay around our beaches and public places with shoestrings bisecting their buns (and I’m not talking about baked good here) and unwholesome attitudes to match. What the hell is happening, etc?! If our little tea-cozy of a village sinks any lower, we may have to ban public dancing a la the movie Footloose. And no insouciant Kevin Bacon figure will come in doing the Twist to chip away at our community’s moral backbone. C’mon, people.

On a separate note, I work quite assiduously, dear reader, to bring you words like assiduously, and I don’t always feel appreciated.

Please feel free to send me a note courtesy of this newspaper once in a great while, lest I be drawn inexorably (always inexorably) into a chronosynclasticinfindibulum. Nobody wants that to happen. Do they? I here present to you another Fortnight’s hodgepodge of diversions:

Roll of the Dyson

T

hey say if you can’t remember the 60s, you won’t… uh… take the last train... to Clarksville? More to the point, on Monday, May 18, our own paisley-infected psychedelic crash pad, (known to squares as SoHo Restaurant and Music Club, 1221 State Street) will proudly proffer a deep 60s throwback vibe courtesy of a handful of groovy bands from L.A. and one from our own Saint Babs. If you dig (dug?) Iron Butterfly, the Velvet Underground, The Doors, and other wildly gyrating paradigm-painters of the day, you will soar with The Mystic Braves, Mr. Elevator & the Brain Hotel, The Creation Factory, and Santa Barbara residents Dante Elephante. Come to SoHo and get your Leary on. Doors open at 8. The evening promises to be the Second Summer of Love. 18 and

over only, tix are $12. The manic and dangerously unpredictable DJ Darla Bea will be spinning beats to melt the grooves off your corduroy bell-bottoms.

And grok this, my babies; while finger snapping, swaying, and Cheshire grinning, you can keep one foot in the comfy 21st century by ordering a delightful side of artisanal garlic French Fries, a SoHo specialty. Oh, yummy yummy, man!

Student Dancers Put On a Show

The UCSB Dance Company has been kicking up its classically trained heels in the glamour-laden cities of Europe.

Now they’ve come home and are ready for one more bittersweet performance to cap their college careers and dance their grateful goodbyes. On Wednesday, May 27 & Thursday, May 28 at 8 pm,

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June 14, at 8 pm ■ Ageless and aged Vicki Lawrence comes to the Granada the UCSB Dance Company will take the Center Stage at Paseo Neuvo. Come wish them well and have your wig blown back by a young, excited, impeccably trained troupe of scholar-swingers.

Vicki Lawrence as Big Mama

Yeah, this one isn’t happening till June, but you’ll need that long to brace for it. Vicki Lawrence has had, by any normal showbiz measure (like there is such a thing), an odd career. She was hired on by The Carol Burnett Show following her mother’s writing of a fan letter to Ms. Burnet commenting on how much her daughter looked like the well-known comedienne. Lawrence won a walk-on role on Burnett’s variety series playing her little sister in a handful of sketches – and stayed on to bring the house down for years with Burnett, Harvey Korman, and Tim Conway, and she was off and running, developing a bewigged familiar matriarch character who she successfully, briefly spun off into her own weekly sitcom. Then in ’73, Lawrence had the number-one song in the country with “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia”, a pop tune unique in the annals of radio hits because it requires careful listening with pen and paper at hand; a radio confection whose narrative plotline is so twisted one wonders if the songwriter himself (Bobby Russel) knew what the hell was going on. I do know lights go out at some point. Sunday, June 14, Lawrence’s now legendary character from the Burnett show, the aforementioned Mama Thelma Harper, will own the Granada stage, dispensing folk wisdom, hollering witticisms, and for some, parting a curtain to childhood evenings sitting in front of the TV with mom and dad in the loving and irrecoverable glow of yesterday. Ahem.

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This post is less a dated event than a nibble to let you know the Museum of Natural History will be featuring an exhibit of Megaladon this summer.

Painted Cave Kayaking, May 23

Wednesday & Thursday

May 27 & May 28 at 8 pm ■ Don’t try this at home – UCSB Dance Company takes to the air at Center Stage dip in the warm oceans of the Pliocene, along comes Megalodon, the terrifying prehistoric 60-foot-long beach blanket behemoth. This thing was so huge and so fierce, when today’s Great Whites are shown file footage of the monster, they cover their lil’ faces with their fins and have to sit in a comfy chair to recover.

So it goes like this: you leave from Santa Barbara Harbor at 7:30 am, cross the Santa Barbara Channel in the company of whales, dolphins, and the odd flirtatious mermaid or merman (not to be confused with Ethel), and wind up exploring, by KAYAK (yeah, a palindrome, and a fantastic Dutch artpop band) a quarter-mile long, 100-footwide sea cave, one of the world’s largest, with an entrance ceiling of 160 feet that features a waterfall. Guests will have time to snorkel and relax before enjoying a hot lunch on the tour back to Santa Barbara.

A once-in-a-lifetime experience!

iMADONNARI - May 23, 24, & 25

The fleeting beauty of this crazily brief, temporal life has inspired

artists through the millennia, from cave-painted Polaroid snapshots of humiliated cave folk fleeing angry bison, to Dali’s mostly successful efforts to capture imaginary dreamscapes with unnerving photorealistic clarity. What could be more fleeting than a piece of art whose canvas is the weather-and-footbeaten tar macadam of a parking lot? iMadonnari answers the question again this year at the Old Mission. 200 street paintings, 400 artists, and an estimated 25,000 gawkers with their faces pointed down, food booths, music, and a general sense of polite and uplifting mayhem.

Don’t step on the Mona Lisa.

Cambodian Rock n’ Roll - May 21

Roland Jaffe’s undersung film about Cambodia’s 1970s revolutionary disaster brought the subject to life in a populist-but-harrowing Hollywood film. But Cambodia was and is, of course, more than Vietnam’s unfortunate collaterally bombed

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11

wartime neighbor and victim of a genocidal Maoist calamity. Like any country with hormone-pumped teens, Cambodia had a vibrant rock n’ roll culture that even the murderously anti-art, anti-learning, and antiindividualism Khmers couldn’t wipe completely out. Don’t Think I’ve Forgotten: Cambodia’s Lost Rock and Roll tracks the youth-driven heartbeat of Cambodian rock music as it finds its feet and is then nearly extinguished by an army of revolutionary, lifehating, murderous bastards. This is a documentary film you have to see to believe, and a timely reminder that art and life and humanity may be considered beautiful weeds that even our collective darker nature can’t completely uproot. Pollock Theater, UCSB, Ocean Road, UCSB, ($5 to $10) Presented by Carsey-Wolf Center.

Thanks for reading, pals… hello?

HELLO?

Dazzled in the Frozen Moment

J

ames Petrucci is a hesitant, husky guy with strangely lustrous brown hair and a fixed, contemplative expression. He isn’t glowering, but his eyes convey the sort of engaged intensity that can come off like a glower. It also isn’t immediately clear if he is actually husky or if he dresses husky; his outline is nevertheless vaguely lumberjack-like. He’s a guy who presents with a discernible center of gravity.

You predict that when the sound comes out of him, it will be moving at escape velocity, that the stillness without will be juxtaposed against the vocal evidence of some complex struggle within, particularly given the efflorescence of his work.

Petrucci opens his mouth to speak, though, and out comes the most mellifluous ribbon of voice you will ever hear, a calibrated bass purr which, when he speaks low, flirts with the subsonic. The guy exudes neither sound nor fury, is not possessed of expansive gestures. Every inner extravagance is poured into the work.

A Petrucci canvas is an expressionist cloud chamber of color and movement, his palette a stirring spectrum that invites and warms even as it challenges; a rough embrace. His work prior to this period was decidedly figurative, but even then had faces and bodies emerging organically from spackled, indeterminate matrices.

“About three years ago, I had just had a show of figurative work at the Arts Fund down in the Funk Zone,” he says. “The work was of deconstructed, semi-abstract figures and portraits which had been my primary focus for several years. The show was the result of being awarded The Individual Artist Award for 2D figurative work from jurors/artists John Nava and Pamela Kendall-Shiffer. It was a wonderful experience, but afterward I had a strong urge to let go of the figure and venture further into abstraction. I was looking for another way to express similar themes but without a human element.”

Petrucci’s otherworldly portraiture was beginning to gain some traction and a measurable public acceptance after some years of perfecting and elaborating. Given the fickleness of the art world, he wondered at the wisdom of his taking a new tack just as his work was beginning to really gain some notice.

“I confided with a good friend whom I really respect – she’s worked as a curator for the SB Museum of Art and at one time had run galleries in L.A. She also helped me hang the Arts Fund show. Her advice was that I owed it to myself to follow that feeling and see where it might possibly lead. Since taking that leap and altering my direction, this path of non-representational landscapes has been my primary focus.”

“Non-representational landscapes” is a cool thumbnail description of the indescribable. The work is lovely to see, but even as your eyes engage the beautiful surface textures, you are quickly drawn into a surrounding and emotionally dazzling middle distance. This is the sort of gorgeous and engaging art before which a seasoned appreciator will stand for 20 minutes with hands folded behind the back. There is much to feel in the work.

“The main subject matter and inspiration behind these conceptual landscapes is

that of fleeting moments, fading memories, and the feelings left behind.

Those temporary experiences where you become completely conscious of the beauty and magic of that specific time and space. For me, it most often occurs when I’m out in open spaces with my wife and kids. One memory I often revisit: The afternoon light has turned to gold, illuminating the tall grass, the gentle breeze making everything alive. The kids, unjaded and unaffected, are running through the tall weeds while their laughter hangs in the air. I remember thinking, “I wish I could live in this moment forever.”

Petrucci has been feted, having been awarded a William T Coleville Grant, an Individual Artist Award from the Arts Fund – namely jurors John Nava and Pamela Kendall-Shiffer, and his juried shows include the Verum Ultimum gallery in Portland , Oregon, the Silvia White gallery in Ventura, and the Liz Afif Gallery in Philadelphia. “I was juried into a show at the Buchanan Center for the Arts in Illinois by the amazing artist April Gornick, who is married to Eric Fischel.”

Petrucci is also an Ojai Studio Artist Member.

“I like to think of my work as a static impression of a world in flux. Layered memories. Everything is always changing – moving forward.”

“weightless” a solo art exhibition Exhibition Dates: May 13 – July 31 Location: Leigh Block Gallery at Hospice of Santa Barbara, 2050 Alameda Padre Serra, Suite 100, Santa Barbara

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SYVSNAPSHOT

by Eva Van Prooyen Keeping a finger on the pulse of the Santa Ynez Valley: what to eat, where to go, who to meet, and what to drink. Pretty much everything and anything situated between the Santa Ynez and San Rafael Mountains that could tickle one’s interest.

4th Annual Chefs in the Park

C

o-sponsored by the Buellton and Solvang Senior Centers and the Santa Ynez Valley Band of Chumash Indians, the 4th Annual Chefs in the Park event benefitting Buellton Meals on Wheels program and Solvang Senior Center will be held on Saturday, May 30, from 1 to 4 pm at St. Mark’s-In-The-Valley Episcopal Church.

“Come for brunch and stay for the fun,” say Colleen Klein – executive director of Solvang Senior Center and Pam Gnekow – executive director of Buellton Senior Center, noting the afternoon and church square will be filled with cooking demonstrations, a silent auction, brunch, wine, beer, In a benefit for the Solvang and Buellton Senior Centers, big band music, hourly raffle prizes, chef Budi Kazali, owner of Ballard Inn & Restaurant, will 50-50 drawing, arts and crafts and be doing a cooking demo on May 30 at Chefs in the Park cookbooks on sale, watercolor demonstration, participation, and display.

“These activity centers are so important for our seniors,” says Colleen adding, “We eat here, play here, and laugh and joke here. Both centers provide nutritious lunches for seniors, wellness classes, and opportunities to learn new skills.”

During an early-afternoon phone interview, Colleen described the activity center: “At this very moment, we’ve got three tables of bridge, one table of poker, and an individual computer training class going on.” She went on to explain lunches are served on weekdays for a suggested donation price of $5, and a yearly membership of $20 entitles seniors to a long list of activities and services including “drastically discounted bus passes”, knitting, crocheting, sewing, chess, beading, seminars to help people navigate health insurance, Pilates, Tai Chi, arthritis exercise classes, visiting nurses visits for blood pressure checks, and field trips. “Most recently were visits to the Santa Ynez Carriage Museum and a picnic lunch outing of bird watching and identifying,” says Colleen, adding, “It is important to have music in life, so on Fridays we try to have some type of music or dance and then something to mix it up like a pot-luck or special dinner.”

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Boasting about her Buellton counterpart, Colleen says, “Buellton has a huge food delivery program for seniors,” explaining Gnekow’s senior center team, “make and deliver over one hundred lunches a day, and they do their own deliveries throughout Buellton.

“As we grow older, we still have things to do, give, and learn to expand our life, which is exciting,” says Colleen. “One of the best things that ever happened to the Solvang Senior Center is having lifetime professional cartoonist, Neil Volke, come teach a basic cartooning class nearly every day. It is so fun to see the group interested, it is so vital, and gives quality of life.” That said, Colleen mentions both centers are always interested in receiving volunteers: “People need community.”

St. Mark’s-In-The-Valley Episcopal Church is located at 2901 Nojoqui Avenue, in Los Olivos. Tickets are $35 per person, and three leading Valley chefs will be doing live cooking demonstrations: Leonardo Curti – restaurateur, co-owner of Grappolo, and cookbook author; Budi Kazali, award-winning chef and owner of Ballard Inn and Restaurant; and Bethany Markee Food Service director at Solvang Elementary School. Silent auction items include Wildling Museum membership packages, wines, handmade jewelry, and a generous assortment of gift certificates from spas, boutiques, and hotels. For more information, call 688-4571 or 6883793 or visit www.firststreettickets.com.

Eva’s Top Faves:

My personal picks, best bets, hot tips, save the dates, and things not to miss!

Trophy Case Beer Buzz!

Congratulations to Firestone Walker Brewing Company for taking home four gold medals at this year’s Los Angeles International Beer Festival for their superior suds labeled Feral Vinifera, Bretta Rose, Feral One, and Pivo Pils. Three of those golds go to their Barrelworks division, which is led by Masterblender Jim Crooks – a.k.a. Sour Jim. Barrelworks is lauded as, “one of the most extensive barrel-aging undertakings in the craft beer industry,” with close to 1,500 barrels. Jim and his team started making wild (sour) beers in barrels acquired from local wineries in 2005.

Baby Miniature Horses

This is generally the time of year two fabulous little English ladies, my mother and auntie, come to Santa Ynez Valley to make the rounds and create a perfect day in the Valley with wine country lunching, wild flower relishing, and baby miniature horse gazing. They would both tell you that it is fairly likely your life will not be complete until you have seen a baby miniature horse. Slightly bigger than a bread box at birth, these tiny morsels of equine perfection can be found running around bucking, kicking, and snorting alongside their mamas every year during April and May at Quicksilver Ranch located at 1555 Alamo Pintado Road, Solvang; (805) 686-4002.

Memorial Day at Melville

Of the trillion things in the Valley to do to celebrate the official beginning of summer, Tacos & Tunes at Melville Winery on Memorial Day at the top of my list. Bring a blanket or chair and set up your relaxation headquarters in the picnic area on Saturday, May 24, from noon to 4 pm. Sip wine, listen to the “hard-hitting soulful swagger” sounds of Saint Anne’s Place – Lompoc’s own blues psychedelic rock band – and enjoy a $10 a taco bar catered by Melville’s favorite Mexican joint, El Palmar of Lompoc. Reservations are requested, as space is limited. For reservations, email orders@melvillewinery.com or call (805) 735-7030.

Apricots, Artichokes, and Arugula

The fresh harvest of summer’s bounty of fruits and vegetables is ready for the picking every Wednesday from 2:30 to 6 pm at Solvang Farmers Market. Stroll through rows of local produce, flowers, nuts, cheeses, breads, and other fresh foods.

Downtown Solvang, on First Street, between Mission Drive (Highway 246) and Copenhagen Drive – rain or shine.

11th Los Olivos Jazz & Olive Festival

Spend Saturday, June 6, from 1 to 4 pm at Lavinia Campbell Park in downtown Los Olivos, tasting wine from 30 local wineries alongside 30 different olive-themed dishes prepared by Valley chefs while listening to world-class, professional jazz musicians, and strolling through the street sampling olive products by vendors. The Jazz and Olive Festival is presented by the Los Olivos Rotary Club, and all funds generated from the event are used for charitable projects supported in part by the Rotary Club. $60 per person.

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REAL ESTATE

by James Buckley

The East Haley Mill Project

T

he Haley Street corridor, bordered

by East Montecito Street and Cota and stretching from Laguna to, well, perhaps all the way to Milpas, seems eminently (and imminently) poised to become the next new Santa Barbara “hot spot” for food, coffee, design, beer, wine, and community commingling.

And, Darrell and Kirsten Becker of Becker Design are likely to be the

Ventura-based property management firm. He is an accomplished (and competitive) tennis player, earned his real estate broker’s license in 1983, graduated from Westmont College in 1988, became a licensed contractor in 1989 and founded Becker Construction in 1994. In 2007, Darrell and Kirsten opened Becker Studios as a full-service design/build firm.

“My dad was in advertising and a

Darrell and Kirsten Becker of Becker Studios have transformed and beautified their 100-year-old-plus 412 E. Haley Street property into a handsome and contemporary complex they’ve dubbed The Mill

concert pianist,” Kirsten tells me during a leisurely conversation with her and her husband, Darrell, in their office compound at The Mill, 412 East Haley Street. Her mother, Kirsten says, “was/ is an opera singer; we lived in London until I was four, and then we were transferred to Mexico City.” Her mom

is Carolyn Kimball, recently seen and heard locally in Rod Lathim’s Seniors Have Talent production. Kirsten, who is an only child, toured the world with her parents, “singing, dancing, and playing the flute,” and is former host of The Learning Channel’s Property Ladder, and so has demonstrated not

The Mill Project, as seen from Laguna Street looking south and east

ultimate catalysts in helping to transform this section of Haley Street from what was once a hangout for hookers and the homeless, to a new and attractive anchor for what will surely become a pedestrian annex to the nearby Funk Zone.

Darrell grew up fixing apartments and managing tenants for his family’s

only her ability to perform in front of a camera, but also her expertise in housing and design.

The Beckers live in Montecito and have been married for nine years; they have “five kids together”: two from his first marriage, two from her first marriage, and one from their current

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Mac Grant Fitness owner Macauley Grant runs a boot camp and gives private lessons at her space in The Mill; here she is working out with client Nicole Larson

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FREE

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POOL COVERS It’s the Law...

David Potter of Municipal Winemakers is set to launch his new label – Potek – in his space at The Mill

marriage. All either attended Montecito Union School or attend now: Andy (the eldest at 23), Hunter (19), Walker, Nola, and Remy, a kindergartner.

Darrell guesses that he has either built, designed, or otherwise dealt with in some fashion “in the neighborhood of seven hundred homes.” Just since the two of them teamed up together, Kirsten suggests, they have done “at least forty homes.”

The Mill Project, however, is the biggest personal challenge they’ve ever taken on or even contemplated. The property had been for sale about three years before they made an offer on it.

The Beckers had an office on Milpas, “but didn’t really have design and/or warehouse space, so we thought we’d be able to pull all our things together in one location (by buying the building),” Darrell says.

Once they bought the property (which had been the home of Tileco for 10 years, and before that, the Pine Trader) however, they realized they wouldn’t need so much space and began to consider what else should be there and settled upon the idea of a complex dedicated to businesses that dealt in manufacturing directly to consumers.

The main 100-year-old-plus building was originally a feed mill and was built after the turn of the 20th century. In 1925, the two-story building at 410 was built with 1,000 square feet of retail space at street level and a twobedroom apartment on the second floor.

The property has housed a mattress factory (in the 1930s), a heating and air company, and a plumbing company.

In the 1980s, it was the home of Doug Margerum’s wine storage business.

When Doug gave it up, it was turned into 26 band practice rooms, and because of that, insulation is thick in the walls and ceilings, making for excellent acoustics throughout. “What was a perfect place to store wine became a perfect place to play loud music,” Darrell laughs. Other

iterations on the property included an unlicensed marijuana dispensary. “It was a can of worms,” says Kirsten. But, when it’s fully converted and open, she adds, “It’ll be lively; there will be music and it will be great.”

The 19,900 square-foot, wood-sided, and corrugated metal-roofed complex includes a second-story apartment (where Darrell’s eldest son now resides and watches over the property). The handsome exterior wood siding “comes from the Midwest,” Kirsten points out.

The Brewery

Filling up the attractively designed complex will be a 5,000-square-foot, high-end craft beer maker called Third Window Brewery, which, with its 18 stainless-steel fermentation tanks, will be the largest brewery in Santa Barbara; it is backed by a group of partners and will be managed and overseen by Christopher Parker, grandson of Fess Parker.

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Potek Winery takes up another 3,500 square feet and will be headed up by David Potter, who runs Municipal Winemakers in the Funk Zone. Potek ...continued p.24

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489 SCENIC DRIVE MONTECITO - LOWER VILLAGE | 3bd/2ba | $1,395,000 | WEB: 0632364 SERENE, SINGLE LEVEL MID-CENTURY WITH OCEAN VIEWS

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Enjoy serene ocean, island views from this classic, stylish single level mid-century modern residence set high above Montecito Country Club on a low-traffic cul-de-sac. The excellent open floorplan offers spacious rooms, beamed cathedral ceilings, and walls of glass to bring the outdoors inside. There are three bedrooms, two baths, plus family room. The sleek kitchen features stainless appliances and breakfast area. Surrounded by lovely gardens and set well back from the street on a .35 acre lot, opportunities abound for outdoor living with large view decks and private patios. Create your own secret garden retreat at the top of the property! Perfectly situated between the fun of Montecito’s Coast Village Road and wonderful downtown Santa Barbara, this location is just a short distance to East Beach and Butterfly Beach with bike paths, volleyball…miles of sand and sea.

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Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission. Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. Real estate agents affiliated with Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. are independent contractor sales associates and are not employees of Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.

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OH YEAH, ALL RIGHT...

by Tommie Vaughn Tommie adapted her love of the stage to the love of the

page. As lead singer for the band Wall of Tom, she created This Rock in My Heart and This Roll in My Soul, a fictional book series based loosely on her experiences in the L.A. music scene. Now she’s spending her time checking out and writing about all things Santa Barbara. Reach Tommie at www.TommieV.com or follow her on Twitter at TommieVaughn1.

La Bohème Escape Welcome to the Ojai Rancho Inn ­you’ll never want to go home Guests enjoy the bar and hospitality at the Chief’s Peak

O

jai. Just saying the word aloud brings a sigh of relaxation, relief, and rejuvenation. It’s true – one word and the people of Santa Barbara, Thousand Oaks, and Los Angeles are smart enough to know that a trip to Ojai is just what they need to awaken

their souls, revive their creative spirit, and wipe away the stresses of their chaotic daily lives.

It starts with the clean air, a heady feeling from that dry heat and woodsy smell that wafts through your senses, as a warm breeze blows through the giant

It’s Mulch Madness!

Mulch saves water by reducing evaporation and keeps weeds out.

And yes, they really do spin vinyl

Wares by local artists at the office store

oaks, supplying the perfect amount of cooling shade, making one feel small and insignificant and at the same time connected to Mother Earth as none other than nature itself can produce.

Nature is what the little town of Ojai has in spades, tucked next to the majestic Topa Topa Mountains, the great outdoors can be enjoyed and adored by tourists and local residents alike – whether it be in an outdoor yoga class or meditation, on the Ojai Valley Trail, by foot, bike or hoof – there is something for every type of spirit seeker, with crystal-clear Lake Casitas as the cool icing on the cake.

Bohemian Rhapsody How to get free mulch: • County residents can load up mulch for free at the South Coast Recycling and Transfer Station, 4430 Calle Real, Santa Barbara

For most visitors, it’s the art that makes their hearts swoon, or maybe it is the artists themselves who adorn the community with their work, as the creative craftsmanship colors the town

• City of Santa Barbara water customers can get mulch delivered to their home or business twice a year for free!

with exquisite original pieces from jewelry, clothing, and furniture. Then comes the sound of music and vibrant visual arts, everywhere the eye can see the town’s love of the musician, of the Bohème. Artists are my type of people, and this piece of heaven is their safe haven from the hustle and bustle, the distractions of big-city life, a place where they are free to be themselves and to focus on the one thing that drives them spiritually to their next interpretation of hip.

If there were one place that could wrap up all of these magical wonders of Ojai into a single destination, it would undeniably be The Ojai Rancho Inn. The brilliant brainchild of Chris Sewell and Kenny Osehan, the Rancho was the beginning of Shelter Social Club, an umbrella company that features other boutique hotels such as the Agave Inn in Santa Barbara, the Hamlet Inn in Solvang, and their newest property, Alamo Motel in Los Alamos. Santa Barbarians have also gotten hip to a taste of Chris and Kenny’s culinary talent at Sama Sama Kitchen on State Street.

Marsha Kotlyar Representing Exquisite Properties of Montecito & Santa Barbara

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Community dining at its best in the Rancho’s backyard

The Kindred Kind

As you pull off Highway 33 into the Rancho Inn, you immediately feel like you have truly found Shangri-La, as the palms and spiny cacti pop out against the barnyard red-and-white Inn, seeming to smile a warm welcome to the newest arrival. It’s almost as if you have been transported to Wonderland, and everywhere you look there is a beautiful bohemian chasing a longhaired, scantily dressed toddler or a hipster musician dressed in plaid and denim, lounging on a lawn chair on the Rancho’s front porch strumming a guitar.

Take that feeling and multiply it by 100 as you walk the lush grounds where this artists’ community of guests relax in the gigantic grassy back lot at a communal table, or next to the sparkling pool, picnicking on a blanket sipping beer and wine from a can from The Chief ’s Peak, the Rancho’s vinyl spinning bar, as their children laugh and play on porch swings, run in and out of teepees, and try their luck at shuffle board – while a cast of musicians play folk till the sun sets over those majestic mountains.

I’m not kidding: this is a real place and not one found only in 1970s movies and my daydreams. How had co-owner Kenny Osehan achieved it? The Ojai Rancho Inn has quickly become the great weekend escape for

L.A. and SB’s happening crowd – but what was the Inn’s history. and how does it stand apart from all the other Ojai hotels?

“Someone showed us a book about the history of Ojai while we were still in negotiations with the Rancho property owner, and there was a little piece in there about the Rancho,” Kenny said.

“It mentioned that the property was designed in a way so that guests could interact easily with one another, and they called it a social club. We loved the idea of it being a social club, because one of our main objectives in all of our businesses is to bring community together. We were also in the process of thinking up a name for our brand to serve as an umbrella for all of our properties.

“That’s how we came up with the name Shelter Social Club. To answer your question, I think the Rancho has an inherent soul from being a place for community to gather throughout the years. From the first time we accidentally stayed here after soaking in the hot springs for six hours, we knew there was something special about this property.”

The Social Club

A sense of community reigns at the Rancho, and the hospitality is warm and welcoming, from free guests bike rentals to tooling around town, comfy king suites with woodsy Navajo eclectic décor and Jacuzzi tubs to soak your weary souls, music in the garden on most Sundays, an office store filled with local artisans’ wares, and such a friendly staff, especially Sheila at the front desk – it’s no wonder guests become family returning again and again.

And if that isn’t enough, Kenny is hoping to add food to The Chief’s Peak with sandwiches, salads, and smoothies, as soon as the city permits. Are you sold?

Get in line, reasonable rates of $99-199 from November-March and $139-259 from April-October keep the small Inn filled, so book early. I’ll see you there!

Ojai Rancho Inn (805) 646-1434 www.sheltersocialclub

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Santa Barbara Seafood Pasta

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May is National Better Hearing Health Month

with Mark Léisuré

Hearing Services of Santa Barbara

Mark spends much of his time wandering Santa Barbara and environs, enjoying the simple things that come his way.

A show here, a benefit there, he is generally out and about and typically has a good time. He says that he writes “when he feels the urge” and doesn’t want his identity known for fear of an experience that is “less than authentic.” So he remains at large, roaming the town, having fun. Be warned.

Focus on Film

M

Hearing Services is promoting “your better hearing health” $250 off per hearing aid and a free charger For the month of May only...

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Ann Burre,

MA, FAAA Dispensing Audiologist AU1181

aybe Americans haven’t yet migrated en masse as travelers to Cuba – though lots of companies including Airbnb are gearing up for the coming tide – but the island nation has made its presence known, at least in our corner of state.

The Cuban film Condcuta (Behavior) won the audience award at Santa Barbara International Film Festival’s (SBIFF) second Wave Film Festival with a special focus on Spanish and Latin American movies. Writer-director Ernesto Daranas’s drama about the relationship between a veteran teacher and a troubled 11-year-old boy bested 10 other submissions that screened over the five-day mini-fest, drawing a combined 5,000 patrons.

The Wave Film Festival returns for a third installment just two months from now, with a second immersion

High Tea Served daily from 2 on festive tiers and includes:

Scone, Slice of Apple Strudel 2 Small Sandwiches, Fresh Fruit A Petite Four, and A Small Cream Pastry Served for two persons or more.

$29.95 per person including your choice of tea: English Breakfast, Earl Grey, Orange Black Tea, Chamomile Chai Tea, Peppermint, Raspberry, Lemon Ginger, Green Tea. We get real English Teas from

The Andersen’s Danish Bakery & Restaurant 1106 State Street (805) 962-5085 AndersensSantaBarbara.com

in modern French cinema slated for July 15-19 at the Riviera. Meanwhile, the Showcase, SBIFF’s presentation of smaller indie and foreign films, continues weekly at the Plaza de Oro. Next up: About Elly, the latest from Asghar Farhadi, the Academy Award-winning Iranian director of A Separation, screening at 5 and 7:30 on Wednesday, May 20.

Movie Mavens

Cinema Society, SBIFF’s 17-yearold series of pre-release films that are almost always accompanied by a filmmaker or other celebrity guest for post-screening Q&A’s, is getting ready to launch its new season next month.

The screenings are held a minimum of monthly but are heavily augmented during the autumn Oscar film season – when audiences get a sneak preview of likely Academy Award movies and nominees – so the average is about 25 a year. Regular passes are already sold-out, but premier members are still available. Those pass-holders not only get priority seating, but are also invited to attend special receptions following about half of the screenings with drinks, hors d’oeuvres, and an opportunity to meet the talent. The cost: $1,800 for two passes – which works out to about $36 a pop – but you can also bring two guests gratis to the films only, which make is just $18.

Marshall-ing Forces

In not-so-happy news, at least from one point of view, SBIFF has decided to part ways with its longtime publicist, Carol Marshall Public Relations. Marshall, the genial, bighearted promoter for the fest for nearly a quarter-century, helped secure and coordinate not only the big Hollywood stars and Oscar hopefuls that populate SBIFF, but also arranged for interviews and coverage with the not-so-famous filmmakers who are the bread-andbutter of the festival, all the way down to the budding auteurs who directed Santa Barbara shorts. Her presence will be missed.

Moon-shots and Magic

The Plaza Playhouse Theater is screening A Trip to the Moon, the

113-year-old short film directed, produced, written by, and starring magician Georges Méliès. The 13-minute film employed special effects that quickly captivated the early film-going public, and it has enjoyed something of a resurgence following its important role in Martin Scorsese’s Oscar-nominated Hugo.

The screenings on May 21-22 will be preceded by magician John Carney’s irrepressible brand of astonishing sleight of hand that alternates with his comedic riffs. Carney has won more awards from Magic Castle (which was founded and is still co-run by Santa Barbara’s own Milt Larsen) than anyone else in history, and while the Plaza isn’t a castle, it’s small enough to be truly intimate for this sort of show.

And the Oscar Goes to...

Get out your mobile device and open up Google Calendar – the dates for the next three Academy Awards have been set. The Oscars will be handed out on February 26, 2016, February 28, 2017, and March 4, 2018; that means the Santa Barbara International Film Festival can now confirm its dates, too, as our ever-growing festival is geared to fall about a month before the Oscars to take advantage of the nominees’ publicity efforts. No truth to the rumors that Vegas and Oscarologists are already setting odds on the 2018 winners.

Dance Revolution

It’s been five years since Carrie Santa Barbara-born Diamond’s American Dance & Music company performed in a theater, as the onetime New York-based dancer/ choreographer eschewed formal concerts in favor of education and more informal shows as part of the Dance: Up Close & Cultural events she co-created. That all gets remedied next weekend when AD&M hits the New Vic on May 22-23 with a full evening of dances that bring back a personal classic favorite of Diamond’s alongside a brand new work, and also showcases two other choreographers.

Diamond hasn’t deserted Up Close & Cultural, though; a couple of the pieces will also be previewed – alongside lots of other local talent – at that event, which takes place at Carrillo Recreation Center on Sunday, May 17.

Santa Barbara jazz-pop singer Kimberly Ford’s fresh take on the Joni Mitchell catalog already sold out SOhO back in December. The apt and amiable singer is bringing the tribute back to the club on Sunday, May 24, a fitting tribute, perhaps, as Mitchell recuperates in a hospital.

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CINEMA SCOPE

by James Luksic A longtime writer, editor and film critic, James has

worked nationwide for several websites and publications – including the Dayton Daily News, Key West Citizen, Topeka Capital-Journal and Santa Ynez Valley Journal.

California is his eighth state. When he isn’t watching movies or sports around the Central Coast, you can find James writing and reading while he enjoys coffee and bacon, or Coke and pizza.

Silver Screen Déjà Vu

A

glance at the mainstream movies opening in mid-May indicates Pitch Perfect 2, a Mad Max update, and a remake of the overvalued 1982 horror flick Poltergeist. If you reboot it, they will come. But hey, who says Hollywood’s imagination has run dry?

At least our Riviera has the wherewithal to showcase the alluring period piece Far From the Madding Crowd, starring an enchanting Carey Mulligan. Elsewhere, as expected, Avengers: Age of Ultron used its testosterone and star power to flatten any would-be competition – including Furious 7, which is mercifully drifting away like car exhaust. For popcorn-crunching intensity with ominous undertones, San Andreas breaks ground near month’s end, but nothing surpasses my eagerness for Love & Mercy, the biopic tuned into The Beach Boys’ enigmatic Brian Wilson.

Although my previous column recommended a trio of laudable films – including this year’s premium projects, Ex Machina and Child 44 – that fruitful stretch has abruptly ended with a death rattle. This time, two miscarriages of justice tip the scales against a solo success:

Not So Hot

T

he title Hot Pursuit purports to be a doubleentendre for two attractive women involved in a criminal chase – though Trivial Pursuit is more like it. This cringe-inducing comedy trots out Reese Witherspoon as a southernfried cop whose late father was a legend on the police force (there’s no proof to substantiate his brilliance; it’s mentioned arbitrarily but we’re to accept it as Gospel), while being shadowed by Sofia Vergara, the feisty widow of a drug lord. We’re stuck with an assortment of car chases, dirty cops, cocaine used for a cheap chuckle, overworked handcuffs – come what may.

It’s a feast of formulaic, lowbrow humor drawing comparisons to The Heat, which proved superior only in the sense that getting slapped is superior to getting stabbed. In other words, such analogies are rhetorical; the most ludicrous of Hot Pursuit’s shenanigans actually seem more believable and bearable than Melissa McCarthy’s vulgar Heat caricature. If there’s any silver lining in this gloomy cloud, credit the unabashed co-stars: Witherspoon strives to be a good sport in a godforsaken role, while Vergara’s rapid-fire tongue evokes laughs, primarily when describing her petite sidekick: “She looks like my little pony.”

Divine Intervention

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boy leads our hero to a hotel, where he meets the kid’s single mother (Soviet jewel Olga Kurylenko, whom I would follow to the end of the Earth).

Impediments abound, due to bureaucratic red tape and armed enemies. Crowe the filmmaker isn’t up to every challenge or every hairpin turn: flashbacks to war-is-hell segments are featured at length (too much, during one agonizing battlefield scene), while the prospect of a romance teeters toward soap-opera pastures.

Even so, he remains a strapping presence to behold on screen, and manages to produce an intricate, handsome, and stirring piece of oldfashioned drama.

Comedic Detour

T

he D Train rolls out of its station to the tune of OMD’s catchy, energizing “So In Love” and its apropos lyric “Don’t lie to me.” From that point forward, the movie goes off track. Its wonky premise should be a clear signal that audiences are in for a dubious ride: Jack Black (spot-on and unfailing) seizes the spotlight as the nerdy leader of a high-school reunion committee whose members can’t ignite enough motivation among their peers. That is, until our dodgy protagonist persuades his boss (excellent Jeffrey Tambor) to book a flight to Los Angeles, under the guise of meeting a wealthy client – when actually it’s just an ex-classmate (James Marsden), once the school’s most popular guy and who happens to be starring in a national TV spot.

It’s difficult to pinpoint exactly where it unravels amid co-scripters Jarrad Paul and Andrew Mogel’s printed prose to what ensues on screen. For starters, if the Hollywood hotshot was so well-liked back in the day, how come nobody kept track of him or realized he was an actor? When our dorky dad watches the performer’s commercial and shares the news, it’s as if nobody – none of the actor’s relatives, old friends, or former classmates – had a clue. (In this era of social media, we’re to believe that nobody involved knew anything about the popular hunk’s career?)

What’s more, complications about sexual preference creep to the fore; it turns out, the two headliners aren’t just ladies’ men, much to the humiliation of one’s wife (a thankless Kathryn Hahn). The half-comedic, half-dramatic tone fails to stabilize, as this Train pings from corny to cool, to solemn to provocative – before derailing amid its own debris.

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ats off to Russell Crowe, who had recently been undetectable in U.S. theaters, but is resurfacing and gushing thanks to The Water Diviner, for which the Australian works both sides of the camera. His directorial debut, if not quite godly, certainly upholds Crowe’s honorable intentions – particularly when demonstrating a sort of “sixth” sense to pinpoint concealed water.

Our story, penned by a pair of Andrews (Knight and Anastasios) follows the weary but determined path of man from Down Under who ventures to Turkey – amid the Battle of Gallipoli’s aftermath – to find his three missing sons. A young

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The JZPR crew, Sydney Gardner, Jennifer Zacharias, and Carrie Cooper celebrate

with Julie Bifano Ms Bifano is drawn to micro-fiction and is currently writing her first novel – The Grace Below. She has a B.A. in English with an emphasis in writing from the University of San Francisco and a M.F.A. in Creative Writing, also from the University of San Francisco. More of Julie’s stories and poetry can be viewed on her website juliebifano.com.

Ladies’ Day Out at SB Public Market Vanessa Tooch, Derek Guilin, and Olivia Garcia have a blast at Ladies Day Out

E

n route to work, I have the luxury of walking through the Santa Barbara Public Market. Is it essential to do so? No, but I choose to because of the feeling one gets while walking through the clean and airy space. It smells like fresh bread baking and neighbors bump into one another, waving or stopping by to say hello. The Public Market also has unique special events such as Ladies’ Day Out, which I attended May 2.

In lieu of Mother’s Day, and to celebrate women in general, Ladies’ Day Out was all about a fun-filled day of indulgence and pampering gals. The first booth I checked out was the Vamp at Home (vampathome.com) area, where a woman received a stunning new hair-do from co-owner Jenny Easter.

According to co-owner Bobbie Mecay, Vamp is a “beauty to you” service where one can call these fashionable ladies to visit their houses and provide services such as manicures, tanning, hair, and make-up! What a concept, especially for new moms who can’t get away easily.

This would be a perfect gift certificate for Mother’s Day or any other special

Emily Erwin represents the local beach chic clothing of Lola Boutique

Jeffa Vegas and Cody Wheatley of the band One 2 Tree play catchy tunes in SB Public Market

Summer Alvarado and Frances Rozhko show off Waxing Poetic’s newest collection

Owner of FLOAT luxury spa, Natalie Rowe, and Vanessa Tooch love an afternoon of pampering

indoor as well as outdoor relaxing areas. Services include facials, waxing, massage, and even acupuncture.

Other booths included local beachchic clothing from Lola Boutique and the new collection of jewelry from Waxing Poetic. I tasted some ripe strawberries topped with Il Fustino’s sweet aged balsamic. Music from the talented band One 2 Tree played in the background, and ladies’ bubbly laughter

could be heard all around.

Before leaving, I had the chance to meet the manager of the SB Public Market, Derek Guilin. He said, “We’re focusing more on community events here at the market. We’re feeding guests and making them happy.” I took one last sample of the unforgettable creamy drunken goat cheese provided by The Culture Counter and felt truly relaxed.

Cheers, Ladies!

Co-owner of Vamp at Home, Jenny Easter, demonstrates fresh new hairstyles on participant Brook Gunner

occasion.

On the other side of the room was the Float luxury spa booth. Massage therapist Erin Gianelli gave someone a relaxing sample rubdown. Owner Natalie Rowe explained the spa has seven different treatment rooms, and

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MADEINSB

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Joel Hoffmann is Santa Barbara’s ultimate cutting-board specialist

by Kateri Wozny Kateri is an award-winning journalist with a

background in print, online, radio and TV news. A native of Minneapolis, MN, she has written for the Chicago Sun-Times Media Group, Pepperdine University and Acorn Newspapers. She works full time as a public relations manager locally and loves exploring the Santa Barbara fashion scene. Follow her on Twitter @kitkatwozny.

Surf’s Up: Santa Barbara Cutting Board Company

T

aking walks along East Beach is one of my favorite, relaxing things I enjoy doing. It’s also an excuse for me to eye the cute surfer guys! I have no desire to learn how to surf, but I am always amazed at their talent.

Something that reminded me of them one day while shopping for my next party at Coastal Collections were these cutting boards made in the shape of surfboards from the Santa Barbara Cutting Board Company. They are so unique, I couldn’t resist buying one.

“I always had a love for being creative and working with my hands,” said owner Joel Hoffmann as I took a tour of his wood crafting facility.

Hoffmann’s passion for being an innovator began as a kid growing up in the countryside of Lancaster, N.H., where he enjoyed building creations out of different materials. He later studied furniture design at Rochester Institute of Technology.

“During college, I had to pay my bills and I made cheese boards to sell,” Hoffmann said. “I would also give them as Christmas gifts.”

After working in Boston, he was recruited to work for Santa Barbara furniture maker Gigi Ronchiepto.

After a year, Hoffmann’s surfer friend convinced him to turn his works of art into a business. The Santa Barbara Cutting Board Company opened in 2000 and since then, Hoffmann has sold about 3,500 items. He says it takes about a week to create 300 cutting

The cutting boards come in a variety of fun styles, shapes, and sizes

boards in one style.

“I originally got a ton of reclaimed maple from Stanford University and I needed to utilize all these short pieces,” he said. “That’s what inspired me to start creating the boards.”

Catching Waves

The cutting boards – Longboard, Fun Shape, Paipo, Big Fish, Little Fish – come in a variety of sizes from 16 to 24 inches. Prices range from $59 for a Paipo to $100 for a Longboard, with the most popular seller being the Small Fish (what now looks awesome against my kitchen counter). There are also the Boardwalk, Pier, and Backpacker squares. The boards can be used not just for cutting, but serving as well.

“The Small Fish is convenient because it can stand upright on its tail in the kitchen,” Hoffmann said. “Customers always say how much they love the boards and what a great gift they would make.”

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The boards – made out of maple – are used as the base wood integrated with mahogany, cherry, beech, and walnut woods for accents.

“Maple is a traditional wood to use for cutting boards. It’s a hard wood and it will not dull knives,” Hoffmann explained. “All of the woods are 100-percent recyclable.”

Also an important FYI: the boards are not dishwasher-friendly, so wash them by hand with soap. Hoffmann also suggested oiling the board when it becomes dry.

“Butcher oil is great for preventing the board from rotting, it will last a long time,” he said. “My first board is over 20 years old, and I’m still using it.”

Endless Waves With the waves rolling in, Hoffmann’s ultimate goal in the future is to sell the boards in coastal towns across the U.S. “I want to sell them at different stores with the engraving being the specific location,” he said.

I may not know how to surf, but at least I’ll feel cool serving on my new cutting board!

Santa Barbara Cutting Boards are found locally at Coastal Collections, The Santa Barbara Company, Plum Goods, Folio Press and Paperie, Whole Foods Market, Blue Door, or buy online at www.sbboards.com. Like them on Facebook.

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...continued from p.15

Whale Watching on the

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Join us online for updates, daily photos and more.

is a new label (named after David’s Romanian great-grandfather), and David says he will not only be processing and barreling the wine on the premises, but he’ll also have a wine-tasting room next to the facility. Most, if not all, the grapes will come from the Santa Ynez Valley.

Potek was Dave’s great grandfather’s last name before it was changed to Potter. His family has always been in the fabric business, beginning in New York before moving to L.A. in the 1960s.

David grew up in California.

“We’re branding the space with the new Potek Winery look and feel, inspired by the old rugs and colors of Romania,” David tells me, “but we’ll be making all the wine (Pinot Noir, Chardonnay, Sirah, Grenache, and Riesling) for our two other locations (one in the Funk Zone and the other in Los Alamos).”

Dave expects Potek Winery to open by mid-June. “The wine’s ready,” he says.

Wildwood Kitchen

Justin West, co-owner, with his wife, Emma-Claire, of Restaurant Julienne at Canon Perdido and Santa Barbara Street plan to open Wildwood Kitchen in their 1,800-square-foot space.

The leases and permits haven’t been finalized, Justin says, but reveals that, “I’m going to be the restaurant guy down there.”

Wildwood Kitchen will be, according to Justin, “a take on American barbecue with a Santa Barbara kind of ranch

influence. At Julienne,” he says, “we’re very ‘farm-to-fork’ with the cuisine that we do,” he adds, “and I intend on being very farm-to-fork at this new place as well.” He explains that the heavy influence will be on smoked meats and American Southern-style barbecue.

There will not only be inside seating, but Wildwood Kitchen will also be able to utilize the central outdoor patio for table service, as will the other vendors.

Justin says he grew up in a restaurant (he was nine years old when his dad opened West Brothers Barbecue in Eugene, Oregon), and has “never known any other life.” Wildwood Kitchen, he says, is “pretty much an homage to my childhood.” He’ll be featuring many of the flavors he grew up, albeit with a contemporary spin.

Justin is relatively new to Santa Barbara, having arrived here in 2007; he met his wife in 2005 at culinary school in San Francisco, and a requirement for graduation included accepting an 11-week internship. Emma elected to intern at Bacara, whereupon Justin came down to visit. “As a born and raised Oregonian, I never thought I’d live in California,” he marvels, “but Santa Barbara has a unique vibe.”

Another major draw for him was the local surf scene “with the warmer water and less-scary ocean conditions.”

They have two children: Michael (3) and Lola (six months). ...continued p.29

Join us for some warm Irish hospitality, authentic food and excellent pints.

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pair of prime multifamily investments

Unique opportunity to own a piece of Santa Barbara history!

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by Christina Enoch

As hip as it gets: chef/ general manager and globetrotter Derek Simcik

Restaurant Rocks in Retro Style

After years of working full time for an ad agency, Christina found her passion in cooking and food.

Now armed with her newfound title, “Culinary School Graduate Food Blogger,” she writes and shares her passion for food, cooking, restaurants, photography and food styling in her popular blog, black dog :: food blog. Christina’s a proud mommy of not one but two shelter dogs and lives here in Santa Barbara with her husband. She’s also an avid Polynesian dancer, beach lover, traveler, swimmer, snowboarder and most of all, a lover of anything edible and yummy. Check out her ramblings here and at www.blackdogfoodblog.com.

Vintage, retro, funky, and California

I

f you are looking for a quintessential care-free, Southern California vibe, look no farther. Forget going down to Venice Beach; just exit on Patterson, in our own Goleta, and keep driving through the strip malls.

I know, it’s not by the beach, it’s not in Santa Barbara, but trust me: as soon as you pull up your car by this vintage airstream camper parked in front of Goodland hotel, your jaw will drop.

Did I time traveled back to 60s? Should I be rocking my new pair of high-waist jeans. Seriously, I ran around the hotel and Outpost restaurant with eyes wide open, repeating, “Oh my god, this place is so cute.” I even went to check out the

Sunday ramen special: Kimchi ramen. Stay tuned for my “Ramen Crawl” article.

Flip flop, boardshort, even bikini, no problem. Outpost’s bar patio says “chill.”

Mushroom bao bun (shitake, hoisin onions, scallions, cucumber), brisket bao bun (fresh horseradish, cucumber, pickled red onions); and pork bao bun (pickled Asian pear, chili, scallion)

Fish Taco (battered halibut, sriracha tartar, smoked cabbage, sesame); Pork Taco (pork shoulder, grilled pineapple, pickled onion); and Duck Taco (pickled red cabbage, pepitas)

One of mixologist Chris Burmeister’s creative cocktails, Pool Shark (Herradura blanco tequila, Lillet Blanc, and pineapple-jalapeno soda)

Mussels (citrus, peas, and corn)

bathroom and recited more excitement, annoying a few hotel guests.

Throughout the lobby, colorful retro decor of Outpost lured me into it, and toward outdoor patio by the pool. Vintage hip! This place screams

Southern California chill.

Food is young, delicious, and creative.

I can see some hipster chefs exploring, having fun behind the kitchen.

Indeed, chef Derek Simcik is literally having fun with food. This guy is a Greece native and has lived everywhere from Africa to Japan and Germany.

Chef Derek, where did you get that vintage flannel?

Bao buns, tacos, and mussels in citrus broth are fresh, light, and tasty. Wash it down with their creative cocktails by mixologist Chris Burmeister. And don’t

Just for the halibut: couscous, green onion, Meyer lemon, and salsa fresca

forget their Sunday night ramen, which switches up every Sunday. Kimchi ramen is the most unique and delicious spice-bomb ramen you will ever eat.

This is just a teaser. My next article on Ramen Crawl should make you step out the door immediately looking for best in town, so stay tuned.

Well, one thing for sure: I can’t wait to go back! Keep rocking, Outpost. Love, peace, and bao buns.

Outpost 5650 Calle Real, Goleta, 964-1288

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Cebada Wines Tasting Room

Located upstairs at Isabella Gourmet

Boutique Wine Tasting Loft in La Arcada Plaza Small Production Estate Wines Burgundian Style Wines Vertical Wine Tasting or By the Glass Bring this ad and receive a 2 for the price of 1 wine tasting 5 East Figeuroa St, Santa Barbara, California Thursday-Sunday 12-6pm

* Additional and Private tastings by appointment

Money can’t buy happiness but it can buy ice cream & that’s pretty much the same thing!!

Weekday special… buy 3 pints and get the 4th free! valid now through July 15th, Monday through thursday Montecito shop 1024 coast village road Santa Barbara Public Market 38 w. Victoria (free parking underground) roriscreamery.com

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UP CLOSE

BY JACQUELYN DE LONGE

The fun-loving staff of the Santa Barbara Adventure Company

Taking a closer look at the people, places, and things that make Santa Barbara so unique. This freelance writer’s credits include newspapers, magazines, and copywriting. When Jacquelyn is not writing, practicing Pilates or yoga, you can find her chasing her two kids and dogs around Santa Barbara. Contact Jacquelyn at www. delongewrites.com

A Three-Hour Tour...

Lost in Paradise on Santa Cruz Island The bright-orange garibaldi, California’s state fish, swims among the kelp beds under Santa Barbara Adventure Company kayaks (photo by Ralph A. Clevenger)

The view overlooking Scorpion Anchorage and part of the cliffside

A

s the Island Packers ferry left sunny Ventura Harbor and headed out to sea, the promising morning sky darkened to a gloomy overcast that met a muted sea at the horizon. Choppy waters rocked passengers side to side as we motored away from the shrinking shoreline. On the upper-deck benches, strangers and friends alike huddled closer together trying to stave off the chattering chill of the cool ocean air.

The boat paused and bobbed alongside a lone buoy, where three young California sea lions lounged and warmed up, disinterested in their gawking audience. The ferry continued on, leaving the harbor out of site and Santa Cruz Island lost in the fog ahead.

Majestic cliffs and a barren beach begin to take shape through the grey haze 40 minutes later, as our boat approached the uninhabited Channel Island.

Santa Cruz, largest of the eight islands located off the California coast, is a National Park and Nature Conservancy with a dozen unique species only found there and more than 100 sea caves including one of the world’s largest, the Painted Cave. Originally inhabited more than 9,000 years ago and even occupied by the native Chumash people, Santa Cruz has a colorful past with smugglers, bootleggers, land disputes, and the United States military during World War II. Now to protect the natural beauty and ecological system of the island, adrenaline-inducing excitement is reserved for the action sports offered by a handful of state permitted local outdoor companies. Tagging along with the Santa Barbara Adventure Company

(SBAC), I was able to experience up close the wonder of this local treasure on their most popular and highly rated excursion, the Channel Islands Kayaking Tour.

We docked at Scorpion Anchorage and disembarked into another time.

Our small group met our guide Ryland “Ry” Grivetti and took a few minutes to introduce ourselves. Among the tourists were a British husband and wife exploring sunny California, an older couple from Wisconsin spending their retirement visiting all the national parks in the U.S., myself, and Andrea Dransfield – friend, biologist, and Santa Barbara Adventure Company employee. Our guide Ry, whose easygoing demeanor and grin paired with his shaggy sun-bleached hair and faded wetsuit typifies the iconic image of a native So Cal surfer, is an experienced leader of eight years-plus with the SBAC. He ran though a brief tutorial as he provided equipment and the day’s excursion. Sitting in one of the kayaks, he demonstrated how to use the paddle most effectively, navigate a sea cave, avoid tipping over, and how to get back into the kayak if we did. He reassured us, “This is something you can all do, and we were going to have a great day!” and thanks to his breezy humor I knew it was going to be fun.

After slathering on sunscreen and suiting up in wetsuits, life vests, water shoes, and helmets, Andrea and I carried our kayaks down to the beach, where Ry helped send us through the small lapping waves. Once our team was out in the water, Ry masterfully jumped

into his own kayak, maneuvering with ease and then met us by the pier to practice our turns and back-paddle before heading north toward our first cave on the three-hour adventure. We paddled over massive beds of feather boa and bull kelp, one of the planet’s fastest-grown plant second only to bamboo, and took a break to admire the steep cliffs and local marine life. Ry informed us of the multiple uses of kelp: an anchor, whistle, playful popper “to shoot at your buddy,” and a source of food encouraging us to try a leaf (a little slimy but actually not bad).

Ry pointed out peregrine falcon nests obscured on the cliffside, while brown pelicans soared out to sea. Young sea lions barked comically as they talked among themselves on the rocks and Andrea exclaimed wide-eyed, pointing into the clear water, “Look, a garibaldi!”

I glanced down to see a few brightorange fish darting beneath us through the kelp. Out here it felt like we were floating in our own private aquarium with all the sea life fearlessly unaware of our existence.

After the break, we paddled around the final cliff protecting the cove, where strong winds and choppy waves batted us back. Fighting against the elements, we made our way to the first accommodating sea cave of the day.

As the weather conditions were pretty rough, Ry went in first to check the safety as our team waited while trying not to tip over. With a big nod and a smile, he led us into the safer cave, reminding us to watch the low ceilings and use our paddles, not our hands, to push off the sides of the cave should the current sweep us too close. Bobbing inside this giant cavern while a blowhole

sprayed mist, my kayak experienced lapping waves as sea lions swam past; it was an otherworldly experience.

I looked up at the layers of volcanic rock and felt dwarfed by the power of millions of years of wind, waves, and platonic shifts that created the cave I was floating in. We doubled back to smoother waters and paddled though another cave, timing it with the rising tides and beaming with accomplishment when we made it out the other side in one piece. I’m proud to say no one tipped over during the tour.

With only two hours left on the island, our group was ready to return for lunch, then head up the hillsides to take in the picturesque view. We ate and changed before Andrea and I were off hiking to the middle of nowhere. That is how it felt especially at the top of the cliffs overlooking Scorpion Anchorage: no noise anywhere. No cell service. No motorboats. No airplanes. No mechanics of any kind. The whole day had been like this. Just the sound of our paddles in the water, our feet on the unpaved ground, our quickened breath, and the blowing wind. True silence and an honest feeling of being one with nature.

All too soon, it was time to board the ferry home. Worn-out and weatherbeaten, we headed back across the Pacific toward Ventura. Andrea and I clinked our beers together (the ferry has a snack bar), and toasted the most exciting and exhausting day either of us had had in a long time.

As idyllic as Santa Barbara already is, the Channel Islands just off the coast are a dream transporting you back to a time before modern man. Their dramatic beauty is stunning and something everyone should experience – and allinclusive companies like the Santa Barbara Adventure Company makes it easy to feel as if you’re on vacation right here at home.

Island Packers 1691 Spinnaker Dr., #105B, Ventura (805) 642-1393 Santa Barbara Adventure Company 32 East Haley St., Santa Barbara (805) 884-9283

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Saturday June 6, 2015 12:00pm3:00pm Our Merchants will be pairing up with a favorite non-profit or charity, providing the public with a chance to meet these import ant organizations and see the wonderful work they do for our community. At the same time many of the merchants will also be showing what they do best. look for specials and samples through out the center.

Rental Housing Mediation

!

The Grand Plan

Other vendors include trainer Macauley Grant’s Mac Grant Fitness, which will remain there; The Beckers are currently negotiating with a bakery that will include a coffee offering.

“We’re specifically looking for a bakery and coffee vendor that requires a handson owner,” Darrell says. In other words, it will not be a national or even regional chain. “We’re looking to partner and cross-pollinate with people who are engaged in their own passion and their own business,” he says.

Darrell is also looking to launch a “grab and go” kind of eatery that will occupy what he calls, “The Shack,” a free-standing small building that fronts on Laguna Street. “It will be for those stopping for a quick lunch, will probably be barbecue-based, and will probably be open from 11 am to 10 pm,” he says.

There is still 1,000 feet of retail available, but the Beckers are hanging on to that for the moment and may decide to open their own boutique there. “We make furniture and other fixtures and offerings, and people ask us why we don’t sell this stuff,” Kirsten says. “Perhaps it’s time. If not,” she says, “a store such as that is what we’d be looking for.”

The Beckers have arranged to include nine parking spaces on the street outside, eight in back, and eight additional spaces on a property on the other side of Haley. They also have an agreement with a nearby daytime business to use its spaces in the evening.

The Neighborhood

“There’s always been some interesting cultural restaurants on Haley,” Darrell points out. “You’ve got La Tolteca, Rose

Fun for the whole family Balloon Animals Face painting, Bounce houses Captain Jack The Pirate, your favorite Green Tinker Fairy, Macaroni Kid Activity Table, Fire Truck, AMR Ambulance, Sheriffs Cruiser, Wandering Musician Animal Rescue and Adoption Food samples

Cafe, Lito’s, so it’s been historically Mexican-based cuisine. Other than that, there isn’t anything else to eat down here.” He cites employees at nearby businesses such as Home Improvement Center who end up driving downtown to eat lunch when they don’t want Mexican. He believes they would welcome a place they could walk to.

“Muddy Waters opened about fifteen years ago, beginning the cultural change,” Darrell proffers. As for Haley becoming as popular a destination as, say, the Funk Zone, he notes that “There’s a lot of momentum on this particular block, but it’s going to take time.”

Pure Order Brewing Company is around the corner at 410 N. Quarantina Street; Carr Winery and Telegraph Brewing are nearby at 414 and 418 N. Salsipuedes, and they’re considering putting a restaurant between them.

North Side!

Optimists

The Haley Street Corridor

Greg Bartholomew (with Hayes Commercial Real Estate) is heading up leasing for The Mill Project, and as for other nearby opportunities, Greg’s co-worker Liam Murphy, CCIM (Certified Commercial Investment Member), points out there is “lots of interest in the Laguna, Haley, Gutierrez corridor. It’s poised for further growth, similar to what the Funk Zone was maybe five years ago.

Anyone who bought anything in the Funk Zone five years ago is probably very pleased with that investment decision,” he opines.

With all this activity and interest surrounding the area, “There goes the neighborhood” may become a rallying cry on Haley Street.

But, that’ll be a good thing.

Goleta!

Library The Friends of the Goleta Valley Library

Fun, Fun, Fun for the whole family! Enjoy the Party. Help your Community just by attending!

Sponsors

Doug Giordani!

The Goleta Gazette

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Plan B

Paddlers sharing the water with ships

by Briana Westmacott When Briana isn’t lecturing for her writing courses

at UCSB and SBCC, she contributes to The Santa Barbara Skinny, Wake & Wander and Flutter Magazine. Along with her passion for writing and all things Santa Barbara, much of her time is spent multi-tasking through her days as a mother, wife, sister, want-to-be chef and travel junky. Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability... usually.

A Call to Arms Gathering at Forney Cove, the night before the 2013 paddle

The first paddlers who completed the 2003 Friendship Paddle

T

here is a precarious patch of water off the west end of Santa Cruz Island where the wind and currents dig up incalculable swells; it is called the Potato Patch and captains are told to beware. The Patch is known to be unpredictable. Tumultuous.

Obstreperous. Much like life, at times the Potato Patch can be unmanageable.

Every year, group of local paddlers tackle the unknown waters in the Santa Barbara Channel. They use their human strength to push across the Potato Patch and continue on to conquer the entire 25-mile stretch of the Channel, solely with arm force. They are organized on relay teams, each team assigned to a different boat. They leave on a Friday afternoon and boat over to the Channel Islands, where they spend the night before embarking on the channel crossing. Their purpose: to raise funds, support, and spirits for a Santa Barbara beneficiary who is battling a lifethreatening illness. They call themselves The Friendship Paddle.

Putting the Paddle into Perspective In 2003, the first Friendship Paddle was conceived by a band of brothers.

John McFadden’s brother, Doug, had been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor at the age of 39. In honor of Doug and his young family, John and six friends who are dedicated watermen decided to embark on a channel crossing. These guys wanted to show Doug that their minds, bodies, and souls were there to support him through his fight. So they took to the water and conquered an almighty ocean passage that was typically only navigated by

The welcome when paddlers land on the mainland

Friendship Paddle founders John McFadden and Doug McFadden with Jeff Chase in the middle

large vessels.

John commented, “The charity of it wasn’t just that we wanted to raise some money for Doug. No, the charity was that we wanted to give him love.”

John, Doug, and 50 others completed the first Friendship channel crossing, and they knew that they had unleashed something powerful. Over the past 11 years, The Friendship Paddle has grown exponentially as they continue to provide support for locals in need.

“You don’t realize what a community you live in until something like this happens,” Tara Haaland-Ford said about her experience of being a beneficiary for the paddle in 2013.

Tara’s family was selected after she was diagnosed with stage-4 colon cancer.

John McFadden reflected on Tara’s paddle, “Tara had just been diagnosed and there we were saying ‘Hey, by the way, we are going to party around this, in a good way, party with love, support, and friendship.’”

The communal response and energy surrounding the paddle is inexplicable.

There is a sense of spirit and emotion that Tara described as being “like an all-around sense of holding someone

up.” Fishermen donate their boats.

Local businesses donate food and gear.

Stand up paddlers train and tackle stretches of ocean that, at times, brings them to their knees. Their arms ache as their hearts pour healing emotions toward the beneficiary and their family. All the while, funds are raised to support medical cost and care. It is a manifestation of love and community.

You Have a Friend in SB

Many of the paddlers don’t directly know the beneficiary. Some have been paddling in every Friendship Paddle since the very first crossing for Doug.

The thing they do know is that someone is in trouble. Someone from the community needs support. Someone needs a hand. And they pick up their boards and paddle out to sea.

The Friendship Paddle typically has between 12-15 boats that aid the paddlers on their journey. Sean Robertson donates his boat, The Spaniard, every year. Sean remarked, “There are guys on the paddle that we see once a year, but as soon as you see them, there are hugs and there is that positive energy, and you are right back

to it. It’s one of the best days of the year, for sure.”

When the paddlers make their way to the mainland at the end of the crossing, the beach is lined with friends, family, and community. Applause fills the air and the souls of the weary watermen and women as they climb out of the sea and onto the shore. Paddlers and families take time to honor the beneficiaries of the past. They remember those who are no longer with us, and they celebrate the lives they lived. “You just cannot measure the emotional giving that comes from the paddle,” John said.

“My brother Doug lived longer than the doctors predicted, and he got to participate in the first three Friendship Paddles. His legacy continues to live on each year with the paddle.”

We have no idea what tomorrow will hold. Life has a way of putting Potato Patches in our path, whether they are small plots to hoe or fields that must be conquered. Sometimes the tilling requires a force and determination that can’t be done by one set of hands. The Friendship Paddle is a testimony of the power that lies in the arms of our community.

Briana’s Best Bets Do you want to see The Friendship Paddle in action? My husband, who also happens to be a producer and filmmaker, created a short documentary about the 2013 Friendship Paddle as a gift for the Ford Family. You should definitely watch this piece. His filmmaking does much more than my prose: www.paradigmpictures.com.

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I HEARTSB Personals. . .

by Elizabeth Rose

I Heart SB is a social experiment in dating and relationships through stories shared with and experienced by a thirty-something living in the Greater Santa Barbara area. All stories herein are based on actual events. Some names, places, and timelines have been altered to preserve anonymity and, most of all, for your reading enjoyment.

Submit stories (maximum 700 words) to letters@santabarbarasentinel.com.

Texting: the Ultimate Booty Call

I

t was lust at first sight. We locked eyes at the holy trinity of gas stations in Carpinteria, at the intersection of Via Real and Santa Monica Road. Small talk about an Earth Day celebration at Alameda Park turned into surf talk into the hot surfer boy getting my number.

Why not? He was cute and I needed to up my game – I had no game, so I figured anything other than shyly turning away was a step in the right direction.

He wasn’t the type I go for. The salty hair and tanned skin was a shift from the wholesome boy-next-door I am normally drawn to. He was tall and had a great body and drove a truck. It made my knees weak. With a red Sharpie on an old receipt, I gave him my digits. I was surprised by my actions but drove away with a smile anyway. Indeed, it wasn’t the classiest of exchanges, but when a guy asks for your number, it can be flattering. Five minutes later, the texting began: Him: “Hi Elizabeth this is ryan. U look great! Where r u from?”

(Here we go. No phone call. Only text.

It seems old fashion courting is out and impersonal detachment is in. Where’s the I’d-love-to-take-you-out-sometime-mayI-call-you situation? But really, what did I expect? I gave my number out to a random. Although it’s cheesy, it’s kinda fun too. I do my best to over look slang and bad grammar.)

Me: Hey Ryan. Thank you, you make me blush! I moved here from San Francisco last year. Love Carp!

Him: That’s awesome. We should meet up. What are u up 2?

Me: Family in town...

Him: Cool. Well lmk if u need a break from them. Ur smoking hot. You are welcome to come over tonight if ud like. I have some extra time i can give to you.

(Oh, geez. I save his number under, “Ryan Cocky Surfer Boy”. Fitting enough.)

Me: (no response) Him: Lets just b mellow and watch a

Looking for some lovin’?

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FULL SERVICE MAINTENANCE & REPAIR movie. The thought of you stopping by gets me excited.

(Oh Lord. Time to cut this off.)

Me: Hey Ryan. You are cute and thank you for the compliments but I’m not looking for a hook up. Take care!

Him: I’m not looking for a hookup either. What gave u that impression?

(Hmm? I wonder?)

Fast-forward a week and he persists on, and I have to give him a little credit for not giving up. Every other day presents a new opportunity to “hang.” I ignore him for the most part, and should have entirely, but instead I responded one last time. (I realize my contradictions – could have, should have stuck to my guns of silence.)

31

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Me: Hey Ryan. Not sure, this week just got nuts....

Him: Im sure u can find a lil opening to put me in.

(Eww.)

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I laugh as I put down my phone. Play on, playa. And that’s what happens when I give my number to a random dude at a gas station.

Sometimes “sexting” is a one-way street.

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