Santa Barbara's Got Talent

WEIRD HAPPENINGS P.6

TWO WEEKS OF LOVE P.10

SANTA BARBARA

VO L U M E 4 | I S S U E 3 | F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

WING HATES WATER P.24

ONE-DAY WEDDINGS P.25

FRIDAY TO FRIDAY FORTNIGHTLY

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

SANTA BARBARA’S GOT TALENT

BOY, DO WE EVER. TEN HIGH-SCHOOLERS WILL COMPETE TO BE NAMED 2015 TEEN STAR ON SATURDAY NIGHT FEBRUARY 21 AND YOU REALLY DON’T WANT TO MISS THE SHOW.

theNEWSPAGE The 2015 South County Teen Star Finalists

I

f you’ve never been to one of Teen Star founder and executive producer Joe Lambert’s stage productions featuring amateur talent looking to pursue a musical career, well, you have really missed a number of knockout shows.

Having attended a number of these performances, including last year’s tearinducing Teen Star finale that selected 12-year-old wheelchair-bound MaryGrace Langhorne as its winner, I can only surmise that this year’s show will be every bit as memorable. And I can only suggest – advise – that you hurry to purchase a ticket to the upcoming Finale on Saturday, February 21, because it will be a sell-out. There will be no empty seats. If you don’t fill one, someone else will. Count on it.

Joe and his crew held auditions at both Deckers Outdoor Facility in Goleta and Pioneer Valley High School in Santa Maria to evaluate ...continued p.12

2|

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

Your locally-owned source for exceptional wines from California and Europe, as well as an array of specialty craft spirits. Let Certified Sommelier Brian Brunello assist you in picking out the perfect bottle for any occasion.

Montecito’s only full service beverage store.

We Deliver!

CONVENIENT PARKING ON CORNER Hours: Mon-Thurs 10am to 6pm • Fri-Sat 10am to 7pm • Sun 11am to 5pm

1271 Coast Village Road, Montecito (Across the street from Los Arroyos Restaurant)

(805) 969-5939 www.MontecitoVino.com

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

the PerfeCt Burger. the PerfeCt Bank.

Our City. Our Bank.

“At The Habit, we know there’s no substitute for quality. Fresh, local ingredients and a friendly, knowledgeable staff: it’s how we create the perfect burger. The Bank of Santa Barbara shares in this commitment to quality and understands the recipe of good business. Since The Bank is locally owned, decisions are made by people who know our team, our customers, and our service. They understand our standard, which is why we chose The Bank as our partner in business.

It’s the perfect pairing: perfect burger, perfect bank.”

Brent Reichard - The Habit

12 East Figueroa Street, Santa Barbara, CA 93101-2709 | 805 730-7860 | bankofsantabarbara.com 5880 Calle Real, Goleta, CA 93117–2343 | 805 770-1300

3

4|

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

GIRLS AGES 6-16 JOIN GIRLS ROCK SB FOR

SUMMER

day camp www.girlsrocksb.org Now Offering

Photography , Film making and music journalism! girls will learn an instrument form a band write an original song perform in front of a PACKED HOUSE

Content

COVER

The News Page – James Buckley shines a light on the South County Teen Star finalists, including Azalea Kemp, Gwennie McInnes, Cheyanne Yang, Sydney Shalhoob, and Isabella Illescas

P.5 P.6

Sharon’s Take – Sharon Byrne sniffs at the prospect of cold viruses, going to the doctor and hospital, and prescription drugs

P.7

L etters – Mark Mohr, Cate W, Kathy Roig, Laurie Lea, Edmund Geswein,Jane Fehrenbacher all have something to say about columnist Jeff Wing and Trader Joe’s; Lourdes Armas, John Lyon, and (once again) Leoncio Martins comment on Jeff Harding’s bi-weekly opinions about capitalism

P.8 P.10

Beer Guy –Zach Rosen explains and expounds on what’s new with distillation, distilled beer, and the Brewer’s Series

i-weekly Capitalist – Jeff Harding looks over his shoulder to B scrutinize the economy since 2006, the financial forecasters’ miscalculations, and concludes we’re prone to endure more stagnancy than growth

The Fortnight – Jeremy Harbin strives to take a novel approach to SB’s upcoming social scene, with recommendations for Valentine’s Day, where to find some laughs, and uncovering art at the zoo

P.13

Man About Town – The Santa Barbara International Film Festival comes into focus as Mark Léisuré pays mind to its honorees; what’s playing on stage from Ventura to Goleta; look around classical corner; and the sound of music throughout February

P.20

SB View – Sharon Byrne expounds again on homelessness, grabs hold of the topic and won’t let go; Cheri Rae thumbs through books, then adds a few words about dyslexia and Jennifer Aniston

PLUS SO MUCH FUN STUFF TO GET THE PARTY STARTED! NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY ALL INSTRUMENTS ARE PROVIDED WHERE GIRLS CAN ROCK OUT WITHOUT APOLOGY

Early bird discount $299 FEB 14th-28th $325/session Session 1 July 20th-24th Session 2 July 27th-31st

P.22 P.23

Shop Girl – Kateri Wozny sifts through a mixed bag of Valentine’s Day gifts with Chocolats du CaliBressan in her heart and on her mind

Up Close – Jacquelyn De Longe gets in the meditation groove with yoga and harpist Ana Caravelle, who explains her background and instrument of choice

P.24

State Street Scribe – How’s this for the Movie of the Week: Jeff Wing can barely bite his tongue when thinking about fellow humans who carry around water bottles throughout the day

anta Ynez Valley Snapshot – Eva Van Prooyen traverses SY and P.25 Svicinity, including Los Alamos, where variety abounds for Valentine’s Day; and tips about what to do from Solvang to Los Olivos

P.27

Cinema Scope – James Luksic peeks through his blindfold at 50 Shades of Grey; he also wears the Blackhat, slices Cake, takes time for Project Almanac, and recommends not visiting The Boy Next Door

ands Full – Mara Peters talks the language – including the F-bomb – P.28 Hwhile swearing that parents are normal

American Girl – As Tommie Vaughn points out, sometimes the word the street (en route to the SB Farmers Market) is a lyric from street P.29 onmusicians and “sidewalk heroes”

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

by Sharon Byrne

take

Sharon’s education in engineering and psychology gives her a distinctive mix of skills for writing about and working on quality-of-life, public safety and public policy issues. Her hyper-local SB View column can be found every other week.

Pain Management: A Fast Track to Prescription Drug Addiction

Y

ears ago, when I had the first signs of sniffles and sneezing, my then future ex-husband would exhort me to get to the doctor. I would grudgingly go, and often be written a prescription for antibiotics. I wondered why, when antibiotics kill bacteria, and what I usually had was a typical flu or cold virus. When I questioned this, my doctor shrugged his shoulders and said people wanted to leave with a prescription in their hands, so he wrote them.

I quit going to the doc for colds after that.

I last had surgery in 1997, when I got my daughter via C-Section. My doctor then was quite conservative with pain meds, which was fine with me since I wasn’t in too much pain after. So it’s been some years since I’d been in hospital, but 2014 saw me check in twice for

surgeries. Everything went fine, but something had radically changed since the last time I was in a hospital bed: pain management.

This had become a big deal, and everyone was very fast to push pain meds. Need more morphine? How is your pain, on a scale of 1-10? Do you need something stronger? Would you like a Xanax before your procedure to help relax you?

I have a fairly decent threshold for pain and a terrible fear of opiate addiction that I can’t rationally explain.

Addiction runs very strong in my family, so perhaps opiates will take me down the addiction drain, and I just sense it somehow. Thus, I tend to avoid pain meds, or any meds, on principle.

I just can’t shake the feeling that some of the medications pushed on me have less to do with my well-being than they

do with golf weekends for prescribing doctors and massive profits for Big Pharma.

I did some consulting work for a medical firm in the early 2000s, and it seemed to me like we spent a lot of time arranging rather lavish doctor getaways, so as to make hard-sell product pitches.

A decade later, I’ve seen sensible, reasonable, professional people struggle mightily with addiction to Vicodin and Oxycontin, so I am put off in advance from taking them. Thankfully, I have been blessed with great health and no chronic conditions that entail tremendous pain, so I haven’t had to face the need for prescription pain meds, except coming out of surgery.

But wow, the emphasis nowadays on pain management is not just a little upsetting. Right before I disconnected cable, now two years ago, I recall thinking, “Gosh, there sure are a lot of ads for pills these days.” If you’re depressed, anxious, not anxious enough, or whatever, they want you to take pills.

Lots of them.

For all kinds of things.

In the hospital, I felt like I was letting the staff down by refusing pain medications, as if I was not living up to some expectation. I was handed

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

5

a prescription for 80 Vicodin on discharge. That seemed like a massive quantity of pills for some discomfort easily handled with Advil. I tossed the prescription.

The death of Philip Seymour Hoffman drove it home once more.

Addicts of prescription opiates have turned to heroin use and died from overdose. Michael Jackson died from prescription drug overdose. Dr. Diaz, the Candy Man of Milpas Street, caused 11 Emergency Room overdose deaths.

Just because the doc prescribes it doesn’t make it safe to take.

The rush to aggressively manage pain by medical professionals, probably an evolution of my old doc’s tendency to write prescriptions for antibiotics, stem from the same place: patient-ascustomer, and the customer wants to leave with something in hand so as to have a satisfactory customer experience.

Big Pharma is all too ready with samples and aggressive sales pitches to help provide that experience.

I am normally a fan of the American ingenuity to spot a need and create a product or service to fill that need. In the case of over-prescription of pain medications, though, I think we’re pushing immediate gratification too far in the wrong direction.

JUMPSTART A NEW, JUMPSTART A NEW, HEALTHY LIFESTYLE HEALTHY LIFESTYLE 80% OFF ENROLLMENT 80% OFF ENROLLMENT FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR A LIMITED TIME SANTA BARBARA ATHLETIC CLUB CLUB 520SANTA CastilloBARBARA Street • ATHLETIC Santa Barbara 520 Castillo • Santa Barbara (805)Street 966-6147 (805) 966-6147 CATHEDRAL OAKS ATHLETIC CLUB CATHEDRAL OAKSRoad ATHLETIC CLUB 5800 Cathedral Oaks • Goleta 5800 Cathedral Oaks Road • Goleta (805) 964-7762 (805) 964-7762

www.swellclubs.com www.swellclubs.com Like us on Facebook Like us on Facebook

Offer based on an annual membership agreement. Cannot be used in conjunction with other promotional offers. Some restrictions apply.

Offer based on Expires an annual membership agreement. Cannot be used January 30, 2015. in conjunction with other promotional offers. Some restrictions apply.

Expires February 28,2015.

2015.

January 30,

6|

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

Bi-Weekly Capitalist

by Jeff Harding

Jeff Harding is a real estate investor and a writer on economics and finance. He is the former publisher of the Daily Capitalist, a popular economics blog. He is also an adjunct professor at SBCC.

Some Weird Things Are Happening

I

t’s an almost amusing task to look back at the economy in, say 2006, when houses were selling at unrealistically high prices, and track the comments of prominent economists at that time. Almost none saw the coming crash. In fact, they said just the opposite: the economy is strong, there are no headwinds, and there is no reason to think that it will end.

How wrong they were.

I’m not talking about some crackpot economists that were quoted by the unimaginative press corps. No, I’m referring to the geniuses of our time: Federal chairman Ben Bernanke, Larry Summers, Christina Romer, Paul Krugman, and many, many others.

Bernanke, the head of the world’s most powerful central bank – before and long after the crash – never understood what was happening in the economy and was consistently wrong in every prediction he ever made. For example, at the very peak of the housing market on February 15, 2006 he said, “Housing markets are cooling a bit. Our expectation is that the decline in activity or the slowing in activity will be moderate, that house prices will probably continue to rise.”

Or May 17, 2007, “…[W]e do not

expect significant spillovers from the subprime market to the rest of the economy or to the financial system.” Or January 10, 2008, “The Federal Reserve is not currently forecasting a recession.”

Or August 2, 2010, “The financial crisis appears to be mostly behind us, and the economy seems to have stabilized and is expanding again.”

As billionaire investor Jim Rogers

Paul Krugman, Art Laffer, Ed Yardeni, Ian Shepardson, Mark Zandi, the economist for the National Association of Realtors, David Lareah (fired), and the economists for the National Association of Home Builders (David Crowe and Ed Seiders, fired). Even our local economist Mark Schniepp and his frequent star guest, Brian Westbury, were dead-wrong about the coming crash.

It might be instructive to look back and see who got it right. Guess what?

Most of them were economists of my stripe (free market economics). Peter Schiff was all over the networks from 2006 and 2007 warning of a huge crash coming. (You can find him on YouTube.)

And there were many, many others – but

Instead of the Fed’s hoped-for inflation, we seem to have deflation. Instead of interest rates going up, they have been going down. would famously remark, Bernanke never got anything right.

Larry Summers was consistently wrong before, during, and after his tenure as Obama’s chief economic adviser. Christina Romer resigned as chairman of the President’s Council of Economic Advisers in 2010 because of her failed prediction that massive government spending would revive the economy.

And not just government economists.

Publisher/Editor • Tim Buckley | Design/Production • Trent Watanabe Managing Editor • James Luksic | Opinion • sbview.com Columnists Shop Girl • Kateri Wozny | You Have Your Hands Full • Mara Peters Plan B • Briana Westmacott | Food File • Christina Enoch Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy | Bi-Weekly Capitalist • Jeff Harding Man About Town • Mark Leisure | In The Garden • Randy Arnowitz The Beer Guy • Zach Rosen | Elevator Pitch • Grant Lepper Girl About Town • Julie Bifano | In The Zone • Tommie Vaughn Mad Science • Rachelle Oldmixon | Cinema Scope • James Luksic Stylin’ & Profilin’ • Megan Waldrep | 15 Days • Jeremy Harbin State Street Scribe • Jeff Wing | Holistic Deliberation • Allison Antoinette Up Close • Jacquelyn De Longe | Behind The Vine • Hana-Lee Sedgwick Advertising/Sales Tanis Nelson • 805.689.0304 • tanis@santabarbarasentinel.com Sue Brooks • 805.455.9116 • sue@santabarbarasentinel.com Judson Bardwell • 619.379.1506 • judson@santabarbarasentinel.com Kim Collins • 805.895.1305 • kim@santabarbarasentinel.com Published by SB Sentinel, LLC PRINTED BY NPCP INC., SANTA BARBARA, CA Santa Barbara Sentinel is compiled every other Friday 133 EAST DE LA GUERRA STREET, #182, Santa Barbara 93101 How to reach us: 805.845.1673 • E-MAIL: tim@santabarbarasentinel.com

you’ve never heard of them because they aren’t famous conventional-thinking economists. But they have the nasty tendency to be right.

I started writing about economics and the crash in 2008. I tried to explain what happened and why, and eventually built up a very solid record of forecasting that, in retrospect, was mostly right, especially about the resulting economic stagnation that we only recently more or less recovered from. Hey, I’m not a famous economist; in fact, I’m not even an economist, just a lowly economics writer. But I’ll gladly stand my research up against anyone else’s.

I am telling you this because I see some really weird things happening in the economy, yet mainstream economists are telling us that everything is fine.

Sandcastle Time

For example, the rest of the world is stagnating economically. China, the EU, Russia, Brazil, you name it.

Oil prices collapsed. Yeah, we may be awash in oil (what happened to all those “peak oil” folks?), but other commodities prices have also declined.

Why is that?

Instead of the Fed’s hoped-for inflation, we seem to have deflation. Instead of interest rates going up, they have been going down. Stock market values seem unrealistic. Manufacturing indices have been declining. Business to business spending is declining. Construction spending is declining. Defaults on car loans are rising. And... money supply seems to be shrinking, a sign that inflation isn’t due anytime soon.

These data points are all not supposed to be happening in a “healthy recovery.”

Remember all that talk post-Crash when everyone was talking about too much debt, and that everyone borrowed too much and when the Crash happened, consumers were wiped out? Well, aside from a brief interlude in debt accumulation from 2008 to 2010, consumer debt has reached an all-time high. Yet, economists tell us that consumers are stronger, loan standards are higher, and there is no problem. How could that be right, when most Americans have little or no savings: 24 percent have no emergency funds, 44 percent have fewer than six months saved, and only 24 percent have adequate savings for emergencies.

The reason all this is happening is because Fed policies deter savings and ultimately destroy capital (or what we free-market types call real savings). The Fed’s ridiculously low interest rate sends the wrong signals to the markets, and investment is made into things that aren’t really economically viable, but for cheap money. If that were not so, we’d see booming capital investment, manufacturing new orders increasing, and prices increasing. Instead, prices are declining (worldwide – it started before oil’s collapse) and investment is shrinking. Like all such money-steroid policies, stagnation is the ultimate result. I thought we learned that lesson in 2008.

You can ignore my apocalyptic observations if you wish, but doesn’t some of this stuff give you a little pause?

Is it really wise to listen to the same mainstream economists who told you that things were just fine before 2008? I can’t tell you that things here are going to collapse into the dust tomorrow – they won’t. But I can tell you that we will see more stagnation than growth. If I were preparing for my future, I think I would be saving as much money as I could.

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

Letters

Although you might not believe it, we actually want to hear from you. So if you have something you think we should know about or you see something we've said that you think is cretinous (or perspicacious, to be fair), then let us know. There's no limit on words or subject matter, so go ahead and let it rip to: Santa Barbara Sentinel, Letters to the Editor, 133 East De La Guerra Street, No. 182, Santa Barbara, California 93101. You can also leap into the 21st century and email us at tim@santabarbarasentinel.com.

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

Over $1 Billion in Sales!

No Ordinary Joe’s

F

or anyone who has ever thought about shopping at Trader Joe’s, Jeff Wing’s excellent State Street Scribe article (“The Beast That Scientific America Built”, Sentinel #4/2) should be required reading. Jeff perfectly nailed the bewildering Trader Joe’s experience. His expert narration of the entire process – from the fearinducing introduction of driving into the awkward, “herringbone parking lot,” to the mind-altering entrance into the “spiritual and spatial confusion” of the store, concluding with the “enlightened” buying process – Jeff got it absolutely right. It’s a weird, yet strangely addicting place. I’m drawn to it like a moth to flame.

Thoughtful and well-written articles like “The Beast That Scientific America Built” are the precise reason I seek out the Santa Barbara Sentinel and read it cover to cover. Keep up the good work.

Mark Mohr Santa Barbara

Write on!

The writing [about Trader Joe’s] is one of the best pieces of insight, humor, and truth. The writer penned a mindreading piece. I have felt an aversion for this shopping style but never gave it a second thought. Wing was right on the dime with his observations. Brilliant.

This was the first time I have read your journal. I’m a fan.

Cate W. Santa Barbara

Say It Ain’t Joe

Perhaps Jeff Wing was in a bad mood the day he wrote his article about Trader Joe’s, or perhaps he meant it tongue in cheek, but I have to disagree with him on all but one point.

The point of agreement is Jeff’s description of TJ’s De la Vina parking lot, which I once heard someone call “the parking lot from hell,” and rightly so.

Entering and exiting that lot at almost any time after 9:30 in the morning is a nightmare because there’s usually a line of cars, sometimes out into the street, vying for a parking space. Fortunately, my husband and I live only a few blocks from the store, and we quickly realized that it made more sense to walk there than to drive, no matter how heavy the bags of groceries that we have to carry home. Not everyone has the luxury of walking, however, and I don’t envy the

drivers who have to line up to enter the lot and then squeeze their large vehicles into tight, narrow parking spaces.

Jeff’s description of the typical TJ customer as a “wise-ass who purchased lowly boxes of Froot Loops only grudgingly and aspired to a boutique grocery-buying experience beyond the reach of the unlettered masses” badly misses the mark. The people I see there – and I go there on average three times a week – don’t strike me as “overeducated and underpaid” souls but rather as a cross-section of the Santa Barbara population.

My friends and I go there, first and foremost, because we can find items that we regularly use at very good prices. Two bananas, for example, cost 38 cents; at most supermarkets they cost double that amount. A quart of buttermilk is $1.99 at TJ’s; a nearby supermarket charges $2.99 for the same item. TJ’s customers are just normal people looking for good prices, which explains why the store is often crowded and the check-out lines are long. Sometimes customers are surly, but I’ve had interesting conversations with a wide range of people while standing in line, and I’ve often smiled as fellow customers and clerks do what they can to entertain other people’s restless or crying infants and toddlers.

Once, a woman who almost ran me over in the busy intersection in front of the store because she was distracted by her children in the back seat searched for me inside the store and apologized profusely for scaring me. These are good people, not “the inevitable TJ’s customer in hemp chinos” as Jeff asserts.

As for the staff, I have only kind words for them. I’ve never seen a trace of annoyance or impatience on the part of any employee when I’ve asked for help finding an item; and on the rare occasions when I’ve had to return a defective item, the people at the desk have taken the item back and given me a refund without the slightest hassle.

I’m not sure why Jeff is unnerved by the staff’s cheerfulness, but I find it delightful. Maybe the employees are so joyful and upbeat because when they’re working there, they’re accepted for who they are, no matter what they’re wearing or how tattooed their arms may be. I couldn’t help smiling ...continued p.14

Dan Encell is one of the few real estate agents in the world who has successfully closed over a billion dollars in residential sales. This tremendous achievement is a result of 24 years of creative marketing, extensive advertising, nationwide networking, unique deal making and problem solving abilities, and consistent hard work.

Advice you can rely on...

Results you can count on!

Put Dan’s 24 years of experience and success to work for you Call Dan Encell at 565-4896

Remember, it costs no more to work with the best (but it can cost you plenty if you don’t!)

Daniel Encell Director, Estate Division Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Call: (805) 565-4896 DanEncell@aol.com Visit: www.DanEncell.com

7

8|

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

by Zach Rosen

Beer Distilled

S

ilver whiskey is usually scoffed at in the spirits world. Many white whiskeys are hot and solvency, with the most interesting character being the burning sensation it leaves in your throat. These views are changing though, due to the efforts of microdistillers like our own Ian Cutler and his Cutler’s Artisan Spirits. Silver, or white, whiskey is basically distilled beer, and Ian’s new Brewer’s Series is a line of whiskeys produced from locally made beers that allow the drinker to taste the close relationship between these two.

Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

What is Distillation?

First, a little background on distillation. This physical process separates the mixture of compounds in a liquid based off of their volatility.

You can roughly gauge the volatility of a compound from its boiling point.

Liquids with lower boiling points are more volatile, and liquids with higher boiling points are less volatile.

Distillation takes place in a still.

A liquid consisting of a mixture of compounds is put into the still and heated. The compounds in this liquid mixture all have different boiling points (volatility). As energy (heat) is put in, the liquid vaporizes (a.k.a. boils) into a gas that rises up the still. The gas exits the top of the still, where it is condensed back down into a liquid (the distillate) that is collected in a separate vessel. The chemical makeup of the gas changes as the still is heated. During the beginning of the run, the gas consists of the most volatile compounds. The heaviest, least volatile compounds make up the majority of the gas near the end of the run. This is a gross oversimplification of distillation, but it gives you the gist of what is happening.

Making Heads and Tails of It

During alcohol distillation, a lowalcohol liquid is put in and distilled into

Bottle of distilled Baseball Saison

a high alcohol liquid. Ethanol (drinking alcohol) boils before water does so the distillate begins with a high ethanol content and ends with a high water content. The first liquid to leave the still as it is run is called the heads and is composed of the lighter, more volatile, molecules. The heads consist of both desirable and undesirable compounds, so the distiller will allow the heads to collect in a separate vessel. The distiller will taste the distillate throughout the entire run of the still. They monitor the flavor of the distillate, determining when it is at its optimum point. At this moment, the distiller will change vessels and begin to collect the hearts, the most enticing part of the distillate. The switch between the heads and hearts is called a cut, and there is still one more cut to be made.

The chemical makeup of the hearts changes as the liquid is collected. The distiller will continue to monitor the flavor of the liquid distillate. Once they determine that the distillate is no longer at its optimum flavor set, they will switch to a new vessel and begin to collect the tails. This part of the

Feel like you’re caught in a sea of swiping left?

Swipe right & come to Corks n’ Crowns as we celebrate the 14th with wine, bubbly & craft beers.

Special Valentine’s Sparkling Flight and Chocolate Pairing from the 12th through the 15th and 10% off bottles of bubbly to go all week long!

Corks n’ Crowns Tasting Room and Wine Shop

32 Anacapa Street in the heart of Santa Barbara's Funk Zone Hours: Monday-Sunday 11am-7pm

distillate consists of the heaviest, least volatile compounds. The heads and tails still contain some desirable compounds, and this liquid will be added to the next distillation run to further separate out some of these components. It is often said that the distiller’s art is where they make these cuts, but I think that is selling the distiller’s role short. Still operations are far too complicated to discuss here, but there are countless factors that go into operating a still, and each one helps determine the overall character of the spirit.

The Silver Lining

The low-alcohol liquid that is put into the still determines what spirit is being produced. In the case of whiskey, the low-alcohol liquid is basically an unhopped beer. In brandy, the base liquid is wine and so forth. The condensed liquid that comes out of the still is always clear. The barrel aging process is what gives spirits their color and many of their flavors (especially in whiskey).

Silver spirits – whether it be whiskey, rum, tequila – are the pure distillate, usually blended with water to bring the alcohol content into a more palatable range. There are some exceptions, but for the most part white spirits are not aged and never touch a barrel. The barrel aging process mellows out the alcohol notes (among other things), so silver spirits tend to have a more raw, unrefined fragrance.

A while back, Ian Cutler decided that he wanted to show people the relationship between the “beer” that goes into the still and the whiskey that is produced from it. So why not use actual beer? Enter the Brewer’s Series.

A Home Run

The Brewer’s Series will exhibit distilled forms of popular beers from around our area. The first whiskey in this series is Baseball Saison from The Brewhouse. Awhile back, brewmaster Pete Johnson brought a batch of the beer over to Ian’s shop and they began doing test runs of the whiskey.

Since then, Ian has been exploring the beer through different runs, figuring out what compounds it contains and

deciding which characters he would like to frame. The beer, Baseball Saison, is a golden ale with a fruity aroma of sweet apples, touch of pepper in the finish, and a honey-malt sweetness. Its distilled counterpart takes on a different guise.

The most remarkable difference between the beer and the whiskey is the change in the esters profile.

Many aromatic molecules are low-weight esters and this family of compounds are often used in fragrances and essential oils. Two of the main esters found in beer are ethyl acetate and isoamyl acetate. Ethyl acetate has a sweet, fruity aroma that is fairly nondescript, tasting the most similar to a sweet, red apple. Isoamyl acetate is one of the definitive flavors in bananas and can also have a pear-like, Juicy Fruit quality to it. German hefeweizen yeast overproduce isoamyl acetate during fermentation which is what gives hefeweizens their characteristic banana flavor. The boiling point of ethyl acetate is around 171 degrees F as compared to 288 degrees F for isoamyl acetate (that is at STP conditions, for you chemists out there). The lower boiling point of ethyl acetate means that bulk mass of this compound ends up in the heads, leaving more isoamyl acetate in the hearts.

In the whiskey version of Baseball Saison, the banana character (isoamyl acetate) becomes much more prominent in the nose with the other fruit flavors taking on a tropical theme of green mango and papaya. The whiskey finishes with a burn that is much gentler than other white whiskeys I’ve tasted. This smooth, elegant finish is characteristic of Ian’s house style and can be tasted throughout his entire lineup. His Vodka and 33 Straight Bourbon Whiskey are the best example of this trait. The Vodka is distilled seven times and is so refined you can taste the soft sweetness from the natural flavor of ethanol. The bourbon is a seamless blend of brown sugar, vanilla and oak with undertones of mulled oranges.

The Brewer’s Series offers a unique comparison between a beer and its distilled side. The Baseball Saison is first, though Ian has already begun test runs with other breweries and beers with some good (and tasty) results.

It is incredible to see the difference between the beer and the whiskey – and luckily you can taste this for yourself.

The whiskey will first be offered at The Brewhouse and will slowly be making its way into select stores. There were only 10 cases produced from this run, so seek it out quickly as it will not be around for too long. Fortunately, there are plenty more beers to be explored in this fascinating series.

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

9

Weekly Happenings in Santa Barbara:

’S FIRKIN FRIDAY! ARE BACK CASK

IALTY C E P S Y O J N E E COM 5PM T A Y A D I R F Y R E BEER S EV T S! S A L K S A C E H T WHILE

NOW E R A S Y A D N O M !

T H G I N Y R T S U OUR IND $4 PINT S / STARTS AT 4PM ERCH AND 15% OFF M O! AND BEER TO G

tion Facility c u d o r P n o t ll e Bu t: and Taproom a A 93427

ay, Buellton, C 45 Industrial W 2 (805) 694-225

Taproom S a n t a B a r b a ra o n e a t : in the Funk Z uite F,

,S 137 Anacapa St. 5 (805) 694-225 1 10 3 9 A C , ra a Santa Barb

2/7 SAT: *PACIFIC COAST BLUES BAND (6-9PM) 2/8 SUN: SUNDAY FUNDAYS! ($2 OFF ALL BEERTAILS 11-1PM) *MATTHEW SZLACHETKA (3-6PM) 2/9 MON: INDUSTRY NIGHT (HOSPITALITY) 4PM- $4 PINTS & 15% OFF ALL MERCH AND BEER TO GO 2/10 TUES: GAME NIGHT & QUIZ NIGHT NEXT WEEK! 2/11 WED: BENEFIT TAPHANDLE DAY: TEAM WORLD VISION (PROVIDING CLEAN WATER FOR CHILDREN IN AFRICA) 2/12 THURS: *RUBEN LEE DALTON BAND (6-9PM) / THROW BACK THURSDAYS #FIGTBT- IF YOU WERE BORN IN THE 60’S GET $1 OFF ANY PINT OR IF YOU DRESS UP IN THAT ERA. (NEXT WEEK- 70’S) 2/13 FRI: *LADY PHAROAH (6-9PM) FIRKIN FRIDAY 5PM!!

2/14 SAT: HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! WE ARE CLOSED FROM 3:30-7:30PM 2/15 SUN: SUNDAY FUNDAYS! ($2 OFF ALL BEERTAILS 11-1PM) *STIFF PICKLE (3-6PM) 2/16 MON: INDUSTRY NIGHT (HOSPITALITY) 4PM- $4 PINTS & 15% OFF ALL MERCH AND BEER TO GO 2/17 TUES: GAME NIGHT & QUIZ NIGHT 7PM 2/18 WED: BENEFIT TAPHANDLE DAY: TEAM WORLD VISION (PROVIDING CLEAN WATER FOR CHILDREN IN AFRICA) KARAOKE NIGHT 7PM!!

2/19 THURS: THROW BACK THURSDAYS #FIGTBT- IF YOU WERE BORN IN THE 70’S GET $1 OFF ANY PINT OR IF YOU DRESS UP IN THAT ERA. (NEXT WEEK- 80’S) 2/20 FRI: *ALASTAIR GREENE (6-9PM) FIRKIN FRIDAY (5PM)!!

2/21 SAT: *OUT OF THE BLUE (6-9PM)

*(LIVE MUSIC)

Los Olivos Taproom:

FACEBOOK.COM/FMBSB

www.figmtnbrew.com

tado, 2446 Alamo Pin 3 4 41 Los Olivos, CA 9

www.figmtnbrew.com expires 3/21/15

coupon cannot be combined with any other offer coupon can be redeemed at any Figueroa Mountain Brewery Taproom

10 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

theFortnight

FEBRUARY 7 – 21

by Jeremy Harbin

Tell us all about your art opening, performance, dance party, book signing, sale of something we can’t live without, or event of any other kind by emailing inthezone@santabarbarasentinel.com.

If our readers can go to it, look at it, eat it, or buy it, we want to know about it and will consider it for inclusion here. Special consideration will be given to interesting, exploratory, unfamiliar, and unusual items.

We give calendar preference to those who take the time to submit a picture along with their listing.

Saturday

Two Weeks of Love

W

e’re far enough into 2015 at this point to have lost that special New Year’s energy, that rejuvenated feeling that makes us think optimistically: “This year’s gonna be different.” We’re mid-February now, and what have we done?

Not much.

And how could it be any different? The world continues its relentless comedy routine – measles at Disneyland, a second Harper Lee novel, an entire nation entranced by large dullards running after a ball and the advertisements surrounding that action. A year like any other.

What you need, my friends, are some diversions from the diversions. You need to go out into your city and make your own news, give yourselves something to talk about. We can’t just sit around and wait for 2016, so we’ve got to get out there and get that fresh, can-do, maybe-this-year-actually-will-be-different feeling for ourselves. Start with this fortnight’s events to engage your minds and – this being Valentine’s month and all – your hearts.

Saturday

February 14 Valentine’s Day ■ This time of year, you’re bound to hear somebody go on about how they don’t “do” Valentine’s Day, how it’s a consumer holiday that was created by corporations to trick us into giving them money, blah, blah, blah. Well, those people are right. Valentine’s Day is a scam; it’s the result of a room full of marketing professionals having a real good brainstorming sesh on how to squeeze even more cash from the mindless suckers of the world (that’s marketing jargon for “the general public”).

But… what’s not? What part of this modern life is left untouched by people with master’s degrees in Bizness and Consumer Psychology and Anthropology of Swindling?

What’s not an attempt to get more of our money? Advertising, marketing, public relations… they make up the ubiquitous trinity that saturates every aspect of our lives – so much so that we don’t even see it anymore.

We’re helpless and hopeless against its overwhelming power and omnipresence.

So Valentine’s Day was invented by corporations. So what? At least this time, they based the lie on the concept of love, right? In this day and age, I think we have to count that one as a victory. I’m saying: give in to it, embrace it. Turn your face toward the warming glow that is the greed of Big Chocolate, Big Greeting Card, Big Rose, and Big Teddy Bear with a Heart Embroidered on It. It’s not “us versus them” anymore; they won. It’s us and them versus our bank accounts.

In this spirit, celebrate Valentine’s

It’s Valentine’s Day, you’ve just had a romantic dinner and then gone dancing, now you’re back at your house with your date. I guess that’s about it. Call it a night, get ready for bed, and start thinking about what you’re going to wear to church tomorrow morning.

Day today, won’t you? The first thing you need is a restaurant reservation.

Actually, let’s back up. The very first thing you need is a date. Many of you have significant others, but some of you don’t. That’s no problem. All you need to do if you’re single is ask somebody out. Problem solved.

If that doesn’t work, it’s still not a problem. Just get a friend to celebrate with you. If you don’t have a friend, well, then I guess this holiday isn’t for you. You’re more of an Easter person; at least on Easter you can just go to church and sit in a pew by yourself.

No need to couple up on Easter.

So now that you know who you’ll be smothering with love today, let’s get back to that dinner reservation.

Hopefully you’ve made one already at a place like The Harbor Restaurant on Stearns Wharf. What could be sexier on the sexiest day of the year than some lobster and sirloin steak? But maybe you don’t have a reservation and so you’re forced to keep dinner more casual, but you like the idea of a romantic stroll

down Stearns Wharf. You could stop

by Longboard’s Grill for a burger and some fries. That could be just as romantic as a nice sit-down dinner if you do it right. Think about it: “Your burger looks good,” your date hints.

“Wanna try a bite?” you ask. Then when your burger buddy reaches over, you hold up your hand. “Let me feed you,” you insist. And then you shove a Kahuna Burger into your date’s face.

At dinner, you’ll need to present your special someone with a gift of some kind. Sure, you could be cliché and pick up a box of chocolates somewhere, but why not do something better than that? A massage, perhaps? A massage from Massage Green Spa (2026 Cliff Drive)? It would certainly feel better than two dozen cream-filled candy hearts.

After the waiter clears the tiramisu dish and coffee cups from your table, you better have a plan. You don’t want this night to end just yet, do you? Of course you don’t. You want to dance the night away like the young and in-love party animal that you are. I’ve got just the thing, or rather, DJ Darla Bea has just the thing: from 9 pm to midnight, she’ll be spinning, in her words, “make-out grooves to set the mood,” at Blush Restaurant and Lounge (630 State Street). It’s called the Heart and Soul Valentine’s Sweetheart Party. Put your night into the capable hands of Darla as she plays all those sweet, soulful jams you crave. It’s free.

Check out www.blushsb.com for more.

Once the dance floor clears out, grab yourself an Uber home and… hmm, let’s see… what else to do?

February 21 Spontaneous Comedy ■ It’s like a breath of fresh air, today’s event. A fun, unique concept taking place in an untraditional venue.

It’s what this column lives for. It is exactly what I’m looking for when I slog through the fortnight’s press releases hoping for a gem. This is it, and it’s called Set List: Comedy Without a Net. First, the venue: Telegraph Brewery works its magic with malts and hops and all that in a hangar at 418 North Salsipuedes Street, in the heart of an area that’s not the Funk Zone, but probably could be in five or 10 years once a Starbucks moves into the Anacapa Project. On this industrial little strip, when the Telegraph tasting room’s lit up and people are hanging out talking and there’s a food truck parked right outside, it feels a little strange in a good way, a little bit – dare I say? – like you’re not even in Santa Barbara anymore. But you are very much still here; that’s undeniable. It’s not like it’s un-Santa Barbaran, this area, it’s more like it’s super-Santa Barbaran.

That is to say, it’s so Santa Barbara it’s beyond today’s Santa Barbara; it’s a glimpse into the town’s future. I like it. There’s a peaceful, easy feeling to it that even my beloved Funk Zone doesn’t have. And the great beer doesn’t hurt the situation.

Now, the event. Set List: Comedy Without a Net is a traveling standup comedy show slash UK television show slash Nerdist web series. And it comes to town tonight at Telegraph at 8. The idea is simple (for us, not so much for the performers).

Comedians take the stage, but instead of launching into their routines, they wait for topics to pop up on a screen.

They then improvise a set based on those topics, which they’ve never seen before.

You’ll see improvised sets from Wil Anderson, Rick Overton, Matt Kirshen, and Santa Barbara’s own Kimmie Dee, but I’m most looking forward to Henry Phillips’s turn at the mic. You might have seen him on Comedy Central or starring in his 2009 movie Punching the Clown, which is a funny film

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

about a struggling comedian that should serve as a nice primer on Mr. Phillips’s comedic sensibilities for those unfamiliar. If you can’t track it down (meaning, these days, you don’t feel like watching it online), I’d recommend his hilarious web series You and Your F***ing Coffee, a bone-dry extrapolation of what it can feel like to impose the slightest inconvenience on someone. That’s my read, anyway; the official line is it’s “about a man who politely asks for coffee, and in doing so, ends up

destroying the lives of those around him.” In episode two, Henry asks if he can take his coffee into a voting booth, and it’s played so real and gets so silly and dark that I couldn’t help but to be put in mind of the time just a few months ago that I spilled coffee all over a shelf of books at Tecolote in Montecito.

For an idea of what you might be getting into tonight, you could pull the Set List web series up on YouTube, but you could also just go in without any expectations aside from good beer in a cool, quiet part of town. Tickets are $15 on nightout. com (supposedly; they were not posted at the time of this writing) and $20 at the door.

Santa Barbara-based events organizers: more of this! Is this kind of thing happening and I just don’t know about it? Are bands playing shows on rooftops and chefs throwing pop-up dinners in the middle of a field somewhere? Folks, send me emails.

Untamed Artists ■ Art. Some people can’t resist the urge to create. They’ve been painting or sculpting, or doing whatever their thing is in some form or another for

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

as long as they can remember. They hate going a day without doing it.

It’s a calling. They go to school for it.

They hone their craft.

And then, some people just make art for fun. That seems to be the case here, as everyone involved in the art show that’s the subject of this entry is an employee of the Santa

Barbara Zoo. Administrators and animal caretakers alike had a go at the canvas, and they came up with a show featuring 27 works of art that are on display in the zoo’s Volentine Gallery.

If you haven’t been to the Santa Barbara Zoo, you might consider it.

I’ve been to a handful of zoos in my day, and biased though I might be, I have to say that our zoo is mightily impressive. The thing that really strikes me about the SB Zoo is… it’s just so clean. I know I should be more interested in the giraffes and the like, but this zoo is clean and perfectly laid out and the animals seem so close. It’s like the perfect zoo; it seems like it’s what zoos were meant to be. I have no idea how the SB Zoo is viewed by the national zoo community, but I have to imagine it’s well respected.

So while you’re there, stop by the Volentine Gallery to see what these employees of a first-rate facility have to offer when it comes to art. Who knows, you might see something you like and that you want to take home.

If so, know that half of the sale price goes to charity. It’s free to view with zoo admission; the exhibit runs until March 22.

A bank you can bank on

How’s that for a novel idea?

All of our customers were once just like you - fed up with their bank always charging more for less. But when they had finally had enough, American Riviera Bank made the transition painless, delivering cutting edge technology, complimentary use of every ATM in the country, freedom from restrictive rules and a level of customer service that other banks only dream of. To us it’s simple smart people want smart banking. Come in and talk to us today about making the smart move. You’ll wish you had done it sooner.

Downtown Br anch

Montecito Br anch

1033 Anacapa Street, Santa Barbara PH: 805.965.5942 | FX: 805.965.8523

525 San Ysidro Road, Montecito PH: 805.335.8110 | FX: 805.565.8542

Smart Banking for Smart People AmericanRivieraBank.com

11

12 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

theNEWSPAGE ...continued from p.1

talent from some 24 high schools and junior high schools throughout Santa Barbara County, and chose 10 finalists out of nearly 100 entrants, five of whom are from South County: Isabella Illescas, Azalea Kemp, Gwennie McInnes, Sydney Shalhoob, and Cheyanne Yang. The other five are Blake Brundy, a senior at Lompoc High School; Zoe Lynn Burritt, a junior at Cabrillo High School; Kaitlyn Chui, a freshman at Cabrillo; Olivia Huffman, a Santa Ynez High School freshman; and Dylan Ortega, a junior, also at Santa Ynez High School.

Additionally, Joe and his team chose two eighth-graders as alternates: Ava Burford (SBJHS) and Kelly Cody (Los Olivos).

Each contestant will be featured in a 45-second documentary before their performance, filmed during their mentoring session with Ike (“Mr. Music”) Jenkins, which will take place at Playback Recording Studio, where Katy Perry wrote and recorded many of her hits, including “Roar.”

I got to sit down with the five South County finalists and conducted the following short interviews with each of them: ■ Azalea Kemp is a junior at

she’ll choose to sing for the big Teen Star Finale coming up on Saturday, February 21, at the Granada, but says it will probably be something from a Broadway show.

■ Gwennie McInnes, a senior at Dos

Gwennie McInnes comes from a musical family; she leans toward the music of Maroon 5, Ariana Grande, and John Mayer

Pueblos High School, prefers jazz music and is in the jazz choir at Dos Pueblos. “But,” she says, “I love all pop music. I love just listening to songs on the radio and singing along and harmonizing with them.”

Gwennie hasn’t chosen her song yet, but admits that she “was just going to pick one of my favorite songs, something that I love;” she just doesn’t know what that will be.

Maroon 5, Ariana Grande, and John Mayer are among her favorites, but she will ask her school’s new choir director, Ike Jenkins, to help her decide. Gwennie, unlike most of the other finalists, comes from a family of musicians. Her dad plays bass, her mom sings, and her brother plays the drums; they “have a little music studio at home,” complete with a drum kit and a microphone.

■ Cheyanne Yang, a Dos Pueblos

Azalea Kemp saw her first Broadway show – The Phantom of the Opera – at the age of four; fittingly enough, her career goal is to sing on Broadway

Carpinteria High School whose favorite songs – to play and/or to sing – are Broadway tunes. “I like to sing theatrical type of music – musicals, show tunes, that type of thing – but,” she says with a smile, “I’ll sing anything.” Azalea says her very first words were sung from the Barney theme song (“I Love You”) and she’s been singing “ever since I could talk.” She also reveals that her goal is to sing in a Broadway musical. “My father took me to see my first Broadway play when I was four (The Phantom of the Opera), and ever since then,” she explains, “it’s been my dream.” She’s not sure what

by James Buckley

and didn’t start singing until she was “about nine,” and began taking private singing lessons. She credits voice coach Joyce Michaels as an inspiration, noting that all five South County finalists take lessons from Joyce, even though she teaches in Lompoc. “As a child, I could pick up on songs really easily, I loved singing around the house,” Cheyanne says; her mother, believing her daughter would benefit from actual music lessons, signed her up. She doesn’t have a favorite song, but her favorite artist is Beyoncé. “She is very ‘spunky’ and there’s a lot of attitude in her music,” she explains, “and I like it.”

■ Team Deckers - Teen Star is

■ Sydney Shalhoob is a ninth-grader

Michelle Apodaca, Deckers Brands director, Offices of the Chairman, CEO, COO & CFO and Stephen Coyne, store manager, Deckers Brand Showcase, liaison between Teen Star and Deckers

Sydney Shalhoob is partial to “alternative” pop singers such as Gabrielle Aplin, Ingrid Michaelson, and Jonathan McEuen

at San Marcos High School who “will probably pick something along the lines of pop” to sing at the Teen Star Finale, “because that’s what I like to sing most.” She says she listens to all different kinds of music, but mostly pop, which she describes as “what’s on the radio,” though she admits she prefers “alternative” pop played by artists who’ve yet to be discovered, and names Gabrielle Aplin, Ingrid Michaelson, and Jonathan McEuen in particular. Sydney says she’s been singing “since I can remember,” and mentions her best friend, Maya Eastman, as an early and chief musical influence.

■ Isabella (Bella) Illescas, a Santa

Cheyanne Yang’s musical preferences lean toward blues and soul music, and names Beyoncé as her favorite artist

senior, finds blues and soul music “interesting” and is what she likes to sing. “That type of music really connects with me, and I can feel it.

I feel like I’m in a whole new realm when I start singing it.” Ms Yang says she “came late to the game”

Barbara High School senior, chooses Amy Winehouse as her favorite singer. Bella also names Aretha Franklin and Etta James as performers she admires. She also names Beyoncé, and says she may choose a Whitney Houston song for the finale at the Granada, and names “The Greatest Love Of All” as a likely choice. “I love all those artists with big voices,” she says and admits that she too has been singing “as long as I remember.” She started taking lessons when she was “about nine” from Sloane Reali and still takes classes with her. Sloane gives lessons out of Guitar Bar (in the Funk Zone).

Isabella Illescas’s influences include Amy Winehouse, Aretha Franklin, Etta James and Beyoncé

presented by Deckers Brands and the mother-daughter team of Claudia Lapin and Sarah Jane Lind.

And Deckers isn’t just putting its name on this event: during a finalist orientation meeting at corporate headquarters, Teen Star talent director Laura Lewis surprised the contestants with a gift certificate, good for a pair of shoes or boots from Deckers’s retail store, just around the corner. Deckers would, of course, prefer that finalists wear their product during the competition but didn’t require it, as some of their chosen footwear may not be appropriate; there will, however, be a group song to begin the show, and they ask that everyone wear their Deckers choices during that number.

The Teen Star prize package can be a real boost for the winner, as it not only includes a $1,000 scholarship, a recording session at Santa Barbara Sound Design, various radio and TV appearances, and training with casting director/celebrity judge Wendy Kurtzman, but also opening performances at The Durango Songwriter Expo.

Santa Barbara’s favorite, most entertaining, and most erudite radio deejay, Catherine Remak (who has been with the event since its inception in 2010, when it began as a benefit for the Performing Arts

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

13

with Mark Léisuré

Mark spends much of his time wandering Santa Barbara and environs, enjoying the simple things that come his way.

A show here, a benefit there, he is generally out and about and typically has a good time. He says that he writes “when he feels the urge” and doesn’t want his identity known for fear of an experience that is “less than authentic.” So he remains at large, roaming the town, having fun. Be warned.

Talent director Laura Lewis and founder/producer Joe Lambert oversee 2015 Teen Star development during Finalist Orientation Meeting

(from left) Azalea Kemp (Carpinteria HS), Gwennie McInnes (Dos Pueblos HS), Cheyanne Yang (Dos Pueblos), Sydney Shalhoob (San Marcos HS), and Isabella Illescas (Santa Barbara HS) are South County’s 2015 Teen Star Finalists

programs in Santa Barbara County schools) will be building houses for the poor in Guatemala when the show is on, so she will be replaced as a celebrity judge by actress-singersongwriter (and Montecito resident) Margo Rey. “There’s a lot of hard work ahead,” Joe Lambert advises the finalists during the orientation meeting. “You need to get yourselves out there on social media and elsewhere to say, ‘Hey, I’m a Teen Star.’ You need to promote yourselves, build a fan base.”

There will be at least three upcoming group number rehearsals, mentor, and video sessions, a tech run-through the day before and a finale run-through on the day of the competition that begins at 10 am and will last until the show ends. Each singer gets two-and-a-half minutes to present their song, and no parents or friends will be allowed backstage on that final day, so whatever encouragement each singer may require is going to have to come from the audience.

••• You can purchase tickets at granadasb. org. Visit TeenStarUSA.com or write info@TeenStarUSA.com for more information.

Oscar Observations

W

ho knew David Oyelowo, who played Martin Luther King in Best Picture nominee Selma, was not only passionate about his craft and racism in the movies but also pretty damn funny? The clips from tribute interviews from throughout SBIFF’s history that have screened before every movie this year have not only been elucidating but remind us just how special the festival has been in the past.

Back in the ‘60s, the hippies used to say don’t trust anyone over 30. But I don’t think that applies to SBIFF. I’m not sure the film programmers out at UCSB’s Pollock Theater would agree, though. Not only have they not halted screenings in deference to the big goings-on downtown, they actually brought some of the same folks in direct competition. For example, the Pollock did a free screening of Whiplash followed

Whiplash writer-director Damien Chazelle has all the answers

by a Q&A with writer-director Damien Chazelle on Saturday night, the same day he appeared on SBIFF’s writers’ panel and three days before he was part of the directors’ tribute. Not sure what it means, but it’s interesting. ...continued p.18

“Are you hearing well Enough?”

1106 State Street March is National Better Hearing Month

Hearing Services of Santa Barbara

805.962.5085

Valentine’s Dinner For Two

including a bottle of wine, music by Chris Judge

Complimentary Hearing Aid Evaluation Expert Hearing Aid Fitting Management of Repairs and Warranties Better Business Bureau Customer Service Award

(805) 967-4200 www.hearingsb.com

5333 Hollister Ave, Ste 207 (in the Goleta Valley Medical Building)

Ann Burre,

MA, FAAA Dispensing Audiologist AU1181

Call for reservations 805.962.5085

14 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

...continued from p.7

when a clerk sang Christmas carols with a customer (slightly out of tune but heartfelt, in the true spirit of the season) to entertain the long lines of people last month. I’m grateful when the employees recommend wines or tell me how they use ingredients in recipes that they’ve devised.

In fact, some of the people who work there go way beyond the call of duty in treating customers well. Two years ago shortly before Christmas TJ’s was introducing Kringle, a wonderful pastry from Racine, Wisconsin, my hometown. When I saw the Kringle, I couldn’t help smiling and telling the man who was cutting up and distributing free samples how happy I was to see that the store was now selling this wonderful product from my hometown. I asked him where it was so that I could buy some, but he told me that unfortunately there wasn’t any for sale yet – that these were samples the store had received from Ventura, and that perhaps there would be some for sale later on. When he saw the look of disappointment on my face, he quickly added, “I managed to get one, and so did a colleague of mine, but I’ll let you have mine, and I’m sure she’ll split hers with me.

It’s obviously something very special to you.” Despite my protests that I couldn’t deprive him of something so good, he insisted on giving me his Kringle, and he refused to accept any money for it.

Kind and generous people like that make one want to keep on going to TJ’s. It’s a great store, and I hope it never leaves town.

Kathy Roig Santa Barbara (Jeff Wing responds: Ms. Roig (may I call you Kathy?), the sweetness of your admonition has chastened me – a little.

I’d like to let it be known that I’m not always angry; I do occasionally sleep. Yes, you’re absolutely right about the crew at Trader Joe’s. Your adoring and adorable Kringle story puts a fine point on the happy fact that they do clearly love their work, love their customers, and exude all the good stuff the world needs, to our common good fortune. Although at times, the love manifests as a sudden panicky

sense that an Up With People! flashmob is poised to erupt. My beef is with those few lotus-eating chakra scholars who glare like hung-over bankers when you pause to regard the lettuce selection and momentarily stymie their journey to the artisanal soy cheese. The Enlightened® are sometimes the least so in situations that fleetingly test us all.

There’s a lot to be said for the Kathy Roigs of the world, the unsung practitioners of Being Here Now who, long before Ram Dass sauntered in with his love beads and ill-advised mustache, simply called it Having a Nice Day. So, thanks for the sweet letter, Kathy, and the reminder of why we’re here. I resolve to be nicer and more forgiving. Starting next Wednesday.

Every next Wednesday. – J.W.)

The Joe-down About TJ’s

The State Street Scribe piece on your visit to Trader Joe’s was excellent, deep, and funny. I got a thrill, like the sensation I used to get when reading my older brother’s MAD Magazine throughout the ‘60s and ‘70s. I have always enjoyed and appreciated satire, while understanding the love and awe of the author’s meaning. It can only take a dedicated Trader Joe’s shopper to grasp the delightful nuances, marvelous pleasures, and exciting parking-lot adventures to write with so much humor and musings. Not at all like those who dictate rumor and hearsay. I do believe, you have single-handedly doubled the trouble with Trader Joe’s diverse crowds and crowding with hoards of newbies wanting to experience the “Funhouse.”

However, I do want to comment that Joe Coulombe’s condition of “being cheap” really no longer exists. Especially over the past year, I have seen prices rise repeatedly and packaging get smaller.

Trader Joe’s is not special in that area anymore. But, their uniqueness forever has my heart!

Laurie Lea Santa Barbara

What’s in Store

Jeff Wing’s article about how Trader Joe’s got started was very interesting.

As a regular shopper there, I must admit it certainly is a unique store; however, I do have some things to rant

Marsha Kotlyar Representing Exquisite Properties of Montecito & Santa Barbara

BRE #01426886

www.SBFineEstates.com Marsha6@me.com 805.565.4014

about.

I won’t go into the parking situation, since that has already been addressed previously in the Sentinel. As for the products and prices, I can’t complain because they have high-quality goods for a relatively low cost. As a matter of fact, I’m not even going to mention that Lompoc never got one (oh, oops, I guess I just did). Anyway, what I’d like to discuss are some of their past products that were competitively priced and of good quality, yet for some reason these items disappeared off their shelves never to be seen again: I’ll start with the chocolate fudge Promax bars. These weren’t just another protein bar. They were comparable in taste to See’s Candy, except way more nutritious. For about a dollar, you got 20 grams of protein in a delicious chocolate bar.

This was a great recovery treat after a long workout, and it went very well with Trader Joe’s peanut butter on it (luckily, they still have that one).

Then there’s the Kashi puffs. Yes, they still have other Kashi items, but the puffs were the best no sugar cereal in the store and they went well with hemp milk, which is yet another item they once had but discontinued.

With all the yuppies and hippies that shop there, how can they not have hemp milk? Even Ralph’s and Fresh & Easy have it. I will give TJ’s credit, however, for finally getting in hemp seed. Maybe there’s hope that hemp milk will make a come back. It’s the best nondairy milk out there, and it’s delicious and nutritious.

Next there was the German gingerbread loafs (not cookies or houses) that they carried for several Decembers, then suddenly one year they were gone for good. The loafs were actually made in Germany, and you could really taste the ginger. As my grandmother used to say, “If it’s not German, it’s crrrap!”. Just kidding!

She never said that (God rest her soul).

But as a former bakery owner who was proud of her ancestry, she was totally right when she said Germans make the best gingerbread. It was sure better than that overpriced holiday stuff they have at a certain world-famous coffee shop that is part of the evil empire of the large corporations. Oh, yeah, I’m sure Jeff Harding will CAPITALIZE on that comment.

It’s absolutely unbelievable that they got rid of the next item. Chocolatecovered macadamia nuts! Management said they didn’t sell, so they won’t be getting them back in. So, chocolate macadamias will never again grace the shelves of Trader Joe’s. Can you imagine that? I mean, who doesn’t

like chocolate-covered macadamias.

Chocolate and macadamia nuts; it’s a perfect combo. People down at Albertson’s are paying the same price for chocolate-covered peanuts. Go figure!

Well, I do have to give TJ’s credit for one item that was pulled off the shelf and recently brought back new and improved. That would be challah (pronounced “hallah”). I once got corrected on the pronunciation and was informed that it is a Jewish bread with religious significance to the followers of Judaism. It sort of tastes like a semi-sweet egg bagel. It’s not really a pastry, but it is tastier than regular bread. Hey, it must be good if a Catholic actually buys it.

Anyway, that about wraps it up!

RIP to Promax chocolate fudge, Kashi puffs, gingerbread loafs, chocolate macadamia nuts, and hemp milk.

I just wonder what they’ll get rid of next. Hopefully, not the Irish soda bread for St. Patrick’s Day. I’d say if they don’t have “blarney scones” by March 1, people should protest in front of the store by river dancing and singing “Lord of the Dance” at the top of their lungs (that was just for laughs; please don’t actually do that).

Edmund Geswein Lompoc (Jeff Wing responds: Mr. Geswein, thanks so much for your polite and goodhumored rant about TJ’s disappearing Kashi Puffs, fudge Promax Bars, hemp milk (I don’t want to know how milk and rope can be derived from the same source) and ECHT Deutsche gingerbread. I know, right? It almost seems like hidden TJ’s cameras record our delight in these products with the express purpose of denying our later purchase and then recording our teary disappointment with yet more hidden cameras and ribald backroom laughter.

Yes, Edmund – you and I are both jittery TJ’s paranoids, if you don’t mind my pulling you along. I can truly tell you that, early on, Joe Coulombe came up with a TJ’s practice he called discontinuity, in which his stores would deliberately procure products that were in actual limited supply (“field-specific canned corn” in one early example) in order to give TJ’s selection a more rarefied feel and the shopper a privileged sense of access and membership. It’s instructive here to remember the Groucho Marx position on joining: “I don’t want to belong to any club that will accept people like me as a member.” Lastly, I was only a little pained to see Mr. Harding’s name sneak into your note. That man needs another letter like Alan Greenspan needs another shot at the Feds. – J.W.) ...continued p.30

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

at home A nurse ... when I need one. >

“

“

Urgent Medical Care at Home 7 days a week, 365 days a year For Seniors Aged 60+. Surprisingly Affordable.

Free for Low Income. Medicare-Supported.

DASH Brings Urgent Care to Seniors’ Homes Visits to the ER Drop by 40% for Participants Elizabeth, aged 85, woke up to a burning sensation on her back. In the past, she would have tried to get a same-day appointment with her doctor. If there wasn’t one available, she’d have to find a way to get to Cottage Hospital’s Emergency Room and wait to be seen.

But on this day, Elizabeth picked up her phone at 8 a.m. and made one call. Within an hour, a nurse was at her door. By 11 a.m., a doctor had been consulted, and Elizabeth began the medication to treat shingles – all without leaving her room.

Elizabeth subscribes to DASH, a local service that provides rapid response medical care to seniors in their own homes. More than 1200 local seniors are enrolled in the service, which is offered by physician group Palliative Care Consultants of Santa Barbara with funding from Medicare. DASH was named the 2013 Senior Citizen Program of the Year by the Central Coast Commission for Senior Citizens and AARP. “It is geriatric care meets house calls meets urgent care.” says Dr. Michael Bordofsky, who began DASH with colleagues Dr. Dennis H. Baker and Dr. Eric P. Trautwein.

DASH is on call, seven days a week, 365 days a year to dispatch nurses and doctors to treat non-crisis yet acute illnesses such as cough, fever, bladder infection, skin problems, shortness of breath, faintness, and dizziness, among others.

Many seniors want to avoid trips to the ER, often by ambulance, but are too weak or ill to get to their doctor. DASH responds, often within the hour, and coordinates with the patient’s primary care doctor for follow-up.

“The ‘magic’ of DASH is that technology allows fast communication between the doctor and the nurse,” says Elizabeth. “Carone, the nurse, sent a cellphone photo of my shingles to the doctor, consulted with him by phone, and then he called in a prescription to the nearby CVS. Wow!”

Nurses carry commonly needed medications, such as antibiotics, so treatment can begin immediately. They can also arrange for lab tests or home health care, if needed.

Dr. Bordofsky reports that ER visits and hospitalizations among enrollees have dropped by nearly 40 percent. “We hear that our enrollees are feeling better and doing better,” he says. “We can quickly evaluate and treat seniors before their problems escalate to the point of crisis.”

Adult children see DASH as a safety net, which can allow their senior parents to live independently longer. For family members and caregivers, it is a relief.

DASH serves seniors in Santa Barbara, Goleta, Montecito, and Summerland. The cost is covered in part by Medicare and in part by a monthly fee of $60 for individuals or $90 for couples. DASH is fully covered for seniors who live in low-income housing or who receive Medi-Cal benefits.

Enroll in DASH Get more information or enroll.

617-0049 dashsb.com

WMention the Sentinel when you call for a free gift.

15

16 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

DISTINCTIVE CONTEMPORARY | MONTECITO $10,999,500 | WEB: 0113883 SUZANNE PERKINS 805.895.2138

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

We sell all kinds of jewels.

We celebrate the rare, the beautiful and the exceptional in all things. Including the most desirable homes in the world. We curate them. We showcase them. We present them as no one else can — to attract the most qualified buyers. Whether they are just down the street or a world away. Chances are we already know them. And they know us. Let us show you.

SANTA BARBARA AREA BROKERAGES MONTECITO - COAST VILLAGE ROAD | MONTECITO - UPPER VILLAGE SANTA BARBARA | SANTA YNEZ

sothebyshomes.com/santabarbara

Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission. Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. Real estate agents affiliated with Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. are independent contractor sales associates and are not employees of Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.

17

18 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

...continued from p.13

The Play’s the Thing

Or make that a whole lot of things, as the fortnight features no fewer than seven productions either opening, continuing, or completing theatrical runs around the area.

Rubicon Theatre in Ventura winds up its run of The Last Five Years, the twocharacter musical in which the span of romance among a theater couple is traced both forward (her) and backward (him). SBIFF just showed a preview of the movie version, which opens later this month, right after RTC’s closes on Sunday, February 15.

Nixon’s Nixon, also a two-character production, is the latest offering from Elements Theater Company, which presents its plays for free in various venues in Santa Barbara and Goleta through Sunday, February 22. Except this one features a couple of well-known real folks, Richard Nixon and Henry Kissinger on the eve of the soon-to-beformer president’s resignation in August 1974. And it ain’t no musical, unless you consider the sounds of conceit and defeat to be music to your ears.

Falling somewhere in between is DramaDogs’ Tales of Woo and Woe: A Journey of the Heart, a brand-new work that extracts a whole bunch of Shakespeare’s thoughts on love – ranging from wondrously new and innocent to heartbreaking and ultimately uplifting – from a dozen plays and several sonnets. And there are three songs and a wandering minstrel threaded between the vignettes, as if the Bard’s words weren’t musical enough. Get wooed and wowed at Center Stage through Valentine’s Day. It’s a whole different ball of wax, or make that bolt of fabric, with Ensemble Theatre Company’s next show, Intimate Apparel, by the Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Lynn Nottage. Sure, the winner of the New York Drama Outer Critics Circle Award for best play a dozen years ago is partially a love story,

but it also delves deeply into issues of race and religion. An African-American seamstress – who sews lingerie for socialites, hence the play’s title – in early 20th-century New York, is unmarried at 35, so she says yes to a Barbadian immigrant she has met through a series of letters, even though she’s in love with the orthodox Jewish tailor who supplies her fabric. He, however, is not a potential mate, as he’s deeply religious and subject to an arranged marriage, too. It opens at the New Vic on Saturday, February 7, and plays through Sunday, February 22.

There are just nine days in the run of the perennially popular British period comedy The Importance of Being Earnest, which takes to the stage at UCSB theater February 13-21.

Meanwhile, this fortnight is so packed with performances that even the Broadway at the Granada series – which can often be so sporadic there might be two months or more between shows – has got two big ones heading our way in fewer than 10 days. The cast of STOMP bangs on pots and pans, the stage, and anything else that’s handy in a rhythmic romp on Monday, February 9, while Mr. Léisuré’s favorite musical of them all, Guys & Dolls, brings those rascally gamblers and the dames who love ‘em to the stage of the elegant theater for two nights, February 17-18. (I’m not apologizing: the title song, “Luck Be a Lady” and “Sit Down, You’re Rockin’ the Boat” are great. And “If I Were a Bell”? How can you not fall for a rhyming couplet that goes “Ask me how do I feel, ask me now that we’re fondly caressing / Well, if I were a salad, I know I’d be splashing my dressing”).

Nourish Your Whole Being

Yoga Soup, the community-centric yoga studio located down behind the Santa Barbara Roasting Company, is hosting a benefit on Wednesday, February 18, and they’ve got quite a menu planned for the evening. Steve Ross will lead Kirtan chanting at 7 pm,

Hidden Oaks Clubhouse

Expansive Mountain Views & Lawn, Gazebo, Waterfall

Romantic Weddings

BBQ, Tables, Chairs, Linens & Heaters Provided 100 Guest Limitation

Glen Phillips of Toad the Wet Sprocket heats up Yoga Soup

followed by Sacred Music with Ishmiel, Patra & Friends at 8 pm, and singersongwriter Glen Phillips (of Toad the Wet Sprocket fame) at 9. Healthy food and drink comes courtesy of Organic Soup Kitchen, Juice Ranch, Savoy, and Imlak’esh Organics and there will also be a silent auction featuring lots of unusual gifts. Proceeds from the evening will support the studio’s own Yoga Soup Scholarship Fund, which provides yoga, meditation, and movement workshops to hospice, hospitals, teachers, and nonprofits.

Classical Corner

Both the Santa Barbara Chamber Orchestra and Symphony (SBCO) make nods to Valentine’s Day this fortnight, with themed programs addressing notions of love.

SBCO’s Chamber Players, who perform at the Museum of Natural History’s Fleischmann Auditorium on Tuesday, February 10, celebrate the holiday with a decidedly romantic assortment featuring Prokofiev’s Overture on Hebrew Themes, Op. 34 (clarinet, string quartet and piano), Poulenc’s Sextet, Op. 100 (piano and wind quintet), and Franck Piano Quintet in F minor, No. 7. Need more incentive to invite your honey?

Chocolate and wine pairing will be served during intermission.

Valentine’s Day itself brings “Triangle of Love” from the Santa Barbara Symphony, a themed-evening of music and words that explores the famous love triangle between Robert and Clara Schumann, and Schumann’s young protégé, Johannes Brahms. Actors from Ensemble Theatre Company will read the composers’ letters between musical performances led by guest conductor Steven Sloane of Robert Schumann’s Manfred Overture, Clara Schumann’s Piano Concerto (featuring soloist Natasha Kislenko, of UCSB and Music Academy of the West), and Brahms’ Symphony No. 1.

Lounging with Léisuré

4760 Calle Camarada, Santa Barbara, CA 93110 www.hiddenoaksclubhouse.com Telephone: 805-967-5574 2833458

Looking for merry melodies or other non-classical musical mirth with Mark?

Here’s where you might find me this fortnight.

The best bet for the two-week

period involves a 90-mile jaunt south to Los Angeles, where the “Stevie Wonder: Songs in the Key of Life AllStar Grammy Salute” takes place at Nokia Theater on Tuesday, February 10, when Janelle Monáe, Usher, Lady Gaga, John Legend, The Band Perry, and Ariana Grande will be among the artists celebrating Wonder, whose legacy includes 25 Grammy Awards, including Album of the Year in three out of four years in the 1970s. The two-hour show takes place two days after the 57th Grammy Awards show. But if you don’t want to schlep, it’ll also be broadcast (in HDTV and 5.1 surround sound, no less) on CBS on Monday, February 16.

Top recommendation here in Santa Barbara are a pair of unusual undertakings making their Santa Barbara debuts. The Nile Projects, out at UCSB on Wednesday, February 11, is the brainchild of UCSB alum Mina Girgis, who has collected a wide swath of musical styles from the various cultures on the banks of the world’s longest river; musical director Miles Jay also earned a degree at the school. Also, Nell Robinson & The Rose of No-Man’s Land, an endeavor featuring Ramblin’ Jack Elliott; bluegrass favorites Jim Nunally (guitar, vocals) and Mike Witcher (slide guitar); Levon Henry (clarinet and saxophone); and Zach Harmon (percussion) on Friday, Friday 13, at the Lobero.

Elsewhere, we can point you toward a bevy of concerts in all sorts of genres all over the area, beginning Sunday afternoon, February 8, with Montecito jazz man Peter Clark at SOhO, where Meiko performs that same night.

Sunday also marks acoustic trio The Wailin’ Jennys return to the Lobero....

Milo Greene and Zella Day share the stage at SOhO on Tuesday, February 10, while the Avett Brothers do their driving rootsy-pop-bluegrass thing across the street at the Arlington.

You may want to head up to the Santa Ynez Valley on Wednesday and Thursday, February 18-19, when the Paul Thorn Band plays the Tales from the Tavern series at the Maverick Saloon and the Fab Four, one of the better Beatles tribute bands, recreate the mop tops’ British Invasion and beyond at the Chumash, respectively.

Singer-songwriter lovers get another nod on Friday, February 20, when Three Women & the Truth, a.k.a. well-traveled folkies Mary Gauthier, Eliza Gilkyson, and Gretchen Peters, perform at the Lobero. Local favorite Tina Sicre has an early gig (6-7:30 pm) at SOhO on Saturday, February 21.

Finally, Taj Mahal, the great bluesman who continues to develop and hone his sound, brings his current trio back to the Lobero on Saturday, February 21.

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

IT’S BACK!

AAA EXCLUSIVE

TRAVEL

SALE

® GET UP TO A $100 VISA CARDbookings* GIFT qual ifying per household with

CONTACT YOUR LOCAL AUTO CLUB BRANCH DURING THIS SALE AND YOU COULD RECEIVE: • Save $960 savings per couple** on select Alexander+Roberts journeys • Up to $500 Onboard Spending Credit† per stateroom on all Azamara Club Cruises® • Limited-time special offers on a variety of cruise and land vacations • Exclusive member benefits • And more!

Tahiti

OFFERS ARE ONLY VALID FEBRUARY 7 – 21, 2015 • CALL OR VISIT TODAY! CALL: 805-898-2870 - AAA Travel CLICK: AAA.com/Travelsale VISIT: 3712 State St, Santa Barbara, CA 93105 FEATURED TRAVEL PARTNERS

*Visa Gift Card offer only valid in California. Minimum purchase required to qualify for Visa Gift Card offer. Maximum one (1) Visa Gift Card offer per household. Offer valid only on new bookings made on or after February 7, 2015 which are under full deposit no later than February 21, 2015 for travel commencing no later than December 31, 2015. Gift Card will be provided to lead client/trip payee following trip final payment. Bookings of $2,500 – $4,999 qualify to receive a $25 Visa Gift Card; bookings of $5,000 – $9,999 qualify to receive a $50 Visa Gift Card; bookings of $10,000+ qualify to receive a $100 Visa Gift Card. Valid only on cruise or tour bookings provided through one of AAA’s preferred travel providers; not valid on Fly/Drive packages. Offer subject to change without notice. Restrictions apply. Visa and Visa Signature are registered trademarks of Visa International Service Association and are used by the issuer pursuant to license from Visa U.S.A., Inc. **Savings valid for AAA members only. Save $960 per couple on new Alexander+Roberts Small Group, Privately Guided or Small Ship journey when paid in full at time of booking from February 7 – February 21, 2015. For travel February 7, 2015 – April 30, 2016. Not valid on Hosted and Free Style journeys. Savings is based on $500 per couple pay-in-full, at time of booking discount, combined with a Double Member Benefit ($230 per person/$460 per couple). Other restrictions apply. †Offer valid on all Azamara Club Cruises® Voyages. Azamara Club Cruises® is a proud member of the Royal Caribbean Cruises Ltd. family of cruise lines. Onboard Credit (OBC) is in USD, based on double occupancy, has no cash value, is not redeemable for cash, is not transferable and will expire if not used by 10:00 PM on the last evening of the voyage. Onboard credit cannot be used in the Casino or for future cruise bookings. OBC is valid for new, individual bookings only made in Club Oceanview, Club Veranda or Club Suites. OBC offer is for a $300 OBC for oceanview staterooms, $400 OBC for veranda staterooms and $500 OBC for suites. Singles paying 200% receive the full OBC amount. The OBC is combinable with other savings programs offered by Azamara Club Cruises at the time of booking creation. OBC is combinable with back to back savings, onboard booking savings, and reduced single supplements. The promotion is not combinable with any other program, promotion or discounted rates. Offer not available to Groups.

The OBC will be applied manually approximately 10 days after the booking window by Azamara Club Cruises. Offers, rates and itineraries are subject to change without notice, and offers may be withdrawn at any time. Other terms and conditions may apply. ©2014 Azamara Club Cruises. Ships’ Registry: Malta.

Offers may be withdrawn at any time without notice. Travel Sale will take place February 7 – 21, 2015 during normal business hours. Certain restrictions may apply. AAA members must make advance reservations through AAA Travel to obtain Member Benefits and savings. Member Benefits may vary based on departure date. Rates are accurate at time of printing and are subject to availability and change. Not responsible for errors or omissions. The Automobile Club of Southern California acts as an agent for the various travel providers featured at the sale. CTR #1016202-80.

Copyright © 2015 Automobile Club of Southern California. All Rights Reserved.

19

20 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

Santa Barbara’s Online Magazine, Published Twice Daily

sbview.com

Milpas on the Move Solid Progress on Tackling Homelessness

I

n a meeting this week, someone brought up the 10-Year Plan To End Homelessness, and asked what happened there, as the 10-year anniversary of the creation of that plan is approaching?

Those plans were in vogue a decade ago, pushed by then Homeless czar, Phillip Mangano. While many cities never fulfilled the ambitions of those plans, they were useful in at least starting the discussion that cities needed to have about this issue. That led to efforts, some quite small, that started to chip away at the larger issue.

Some of those efforts are showing quite a bit of promise, though it may not feel like it at times.

We just completed the Point in Time Vulnerability Count organized

by Common Ground. More than 600 volunteers hit the streets at 5 am last week to interview people experiencing homelessness. This is our third survey.

by Sharon Byrne

Getting good data is paramount to solving the problem. It helps you see where you’re making progress, and where you’re stalled.

Santa Monica started doing annual counts in 2006. It learned that over half the people they were attempting to serve weren’t even from L.A. County, a burden they could not assume. They roped in county services, the VA, and started working aggressively on the issue.

Their counts dropped dramatically as a result, and then stalled in 2011. From this, they realized that while they still had work to do, they had probably prevented increased homelessness for their city.

For our count, the mayor was down on Milpas Street, working hard. Our neighborhood team was also out on Milpas, accompanied by a leader in the Downtown Organization, learning more about how this all works. The mayor recently signed the pledge to end veterans’ homelessness. The Obama Administration has put a lot of funding

We Are

Art

SBMM Santa Barbara Maritime Museum

Join us February 19th for a photographic journey & art opening as Doug Klug shares his experience diving the underwater reefs and kelp forests of Anacapa Island.

RSVP: 805-962-8404x115 • Artist Reception: 5:30pm • Lecture: 7pm 113 Harbor Way, Ste 190, Santa Barbara, CA 93109 • sbmm.org • (805) 962-8404

Sharon Byrne

Sharon Byrne is executive director for the Milpas Community Association, and currently serves on the Advisory Boards for the Salvation Army Hospitality House and Santa Barbara County Alcohol and Drug Problems.

sbview.com into resources for veterans, making it possible to realistically tackle this problem.

The Milpas Outreach Project reached its one-year anniversary mark this week.

We started one year ago by deciding to tackle chronic homelessness in the area, and targeted the Top 5 policeand-fire users. One year later, we’ve achieved success with seven individuals who embraced sobriety, and were either housed or reunified with willing and able family members. We’ve fallen into bureaucratic holes and learned a lot of new tools. We also learned that working at the community level has so far been our most effective way to reduce the impacts of homelessness to the area.

Members of the Downtown Organization came to Milpas last week to learn about the project and to explore adapting it for State Street.

There are some key differences between Milpas and State. The “travelers” require a very different approach than the chronically homeless, for instance.

We were impressed with the businesses participating in the conversation from downtown, and sympathetic to their struggles. They’d already identified their Top 5 chronically homeless individuals and outreached to them to learn their names and history. That is how it starts. There will probably be some coordination between these two efforts, tackling these problems at the curb level, and a whole lot of learning. Getting results is the goal. It’s well-known that homelessness is hazardous to your health, and it’s disheartening to see the same face on the street, year after year.

Hopefully, they will be able to leverage everything we learned in piloting this project, and we stand ready to assist in any way we can.

One of the holes we stumbled into is mental health. The Little Hoover Commission, a state-level organization that explores reforms to increase the state’s efficiency, recently released its comprehensive report on the Mental Health Services Act. Passed in 2004, the act passed the decade mark, and has generated over $13 billion in funds for the most critically mentally ill. But the persistent presence of severely mentally ill individuals on our streets indicates something isn’t working. While some

progress has been made, commission chair Pedro Nava wrote, “After 10 years, the state cannot provide basic answers to basic questions: Has homelessness declined? Are programs helping Californians stay at work or in school?

Who is being served and who is falling through the cracks?”

You can read the full report at www.lhc. ca.gov/reports/healthhumanservices. html.

So, on a number of fronts, we’re leaving the lofty clouds of policy discussion, anecdote, and rhetoric, and moving to tackle the problem at the street level, where we can truly make a difference.

Yeah, we need to make more progress – but you have to start somewhere, doing something, and that is happening.

SB Book Review

by Cheri Rae

Old Spanish Days

H

ow lucky we are in Santa Barbara to still have in our midst a cadre of intrepid individuals who care about our origins, who understand our underpinnings, and who are willing to dedicate their time, talent in treasure in telling the stories of this very special place.

Erin Graffy de Garcia’s new book provides artistic insight and historical perspective

Such is the case with the talented woman-about-town Erin Graffy de Garcia, who has recently released her newest book, Old Spanish Days: Santa Barbara’s History Through Public Art. The prolific Santa Barbara author got to play “history detective,” as she terms it, in the creation of this book.

She hunted down the backstories and did some impressive research about incredible art in our midst – that we may well take for granted in our daily lives.

The reader pages through in wonderment, with the realization of seeing these semi-familiar tiles, murals, medallions, friezes, sculptures, and paintings that reveal the rest of the story

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

Cheri Rae

Cheri Rae is the senior editor and columnist for sbview.com. Known for her civic activism and insightful chronicles of the local scene, Cheri has a hard-won reputation for writing about issues that other Santa Barbara-based writers are reluctant to tackle.

sbview.com to the artistic sights depicting our city’s history that we see all around us but may forget to notice. Each section is filled with the sense of “I’ve seen that, but never knew anything about it.”

Our historic public art is where you find it, and thanks to the author’s sleuthing, the reader is treated to views, as she writes, “where you least expect it: a public space, a restaurant, or even an office building is likely to blossom forth with some vestige of history preserved on a canvas, painted on a wall, flashed in a weathervane, captured in a tile, mural, or enshrined in a frieze on a courtyard eave.”

The combination of Graffy de Garcia’s sparkling writing style, the excellent photos by Fritz Olenberger, and the clean graphic design by Anna Lafferty allows the art to take center stage. It is

complemented by history lessons, and even insights about the individual artists whose work decorate and commemorate our city and its unique past.

This labor of love is like a Valentine to Santa Barbara – and Santa Barbarans.

Come to think of it, what a thoughtful and appropriate gift it would be on Saturday, February 14, for all those who love Santa Barbara, its romance, beauty and historic legacy.

Jennifer Aniston and Her Dyslexia

J

ennifer Aniston has it all: She is accomplished, beautiful, rich, and famous. On January 30, she received the prestigious Montecito Award at the 30th Annual Santa Barbara International Film Festival in recognition of her career-long “classic and standout performances” and her style that “has made a major contribution to film.”

And, as she recently revealed, she has dyslexia. In a lengthy article published in The Hollywood Reporter, Aniston noted that school had always been a struggle for her, that her favorite classes were art and drama—and that she never considered herself smart.

She spent much of her time in school

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

developing her sense of humor and cultivating friendships. When she was identified with dyslexia in her early 20s, it was “life-changing,” she said. “I felt like all of my childhood traumadies, tragedies, dramas were explained.”

Aniston is in good company. Show business – past and present – is full of talented, award-winning individuals with dyslexia, including innovative directors Walt Disney, Alfred Hitchcock, and Steven Spielberg; actors Kiera Knightley, Orlando Bloom, and Tom Cruise; screenwriters Fannie Flagg, Brian Grazer, and Billy Bob Thornton.

So why does it matter for any of us to know about a famous person’s dyslexia? Because people with dyslexia struggle so much in school, they need to know there is successful life after the classroom. They need to have hope that they will succeed.

Just this week, I met with the mother of a high-school girl with dyslexia who aspires to be a photojournalist. She is a cheerleader with lots of friends; she’s bright, funny, and motivated to achieve, and she loves to perform.

But she does not do well on tests; she struggles with her reading she often stays up until 2 am completing her

THE

PARADISE CAFE VALENTINE’S DAY IN PARADISE

homework. The poor girl is getting ground down; she does not feel like she is smart and is reluctant to set high educational goals for fear she will not succeed.

When I told the mom that she should tell her daughter that Jennifer Aniston just revealed her dyslexia and feelings of not being smart, the girl brightened at the thought.

Positive role models matter. Because Aniston was willing to talk about her struggles in school and her feelings of inadequacy in the classroom, she will have a whole new group of admirers when she steps out on that red carpet: the one in five individuals who share her dyslexia will now view her with the respect that comes from shared understanding of triumph over difficulty.

Her revelation – which grabbed headlines around the world – means hope: if she could succeed with dyslexia, maybe they can, too. For so many of these kids and their families, dyslexia is a hidden issue of quiet desperation.

But she has shined a bright light on dyslexia, and brought to it to a much bigger stage, right at the moment when all eyes are on her for many career accomplishments.

Valentine’s Dinner Includes: A Glass of Champagne Choice of Appetizer Grilled Artichoke or Ceviche

Choice of Salad Caesar, Mixed Market Greens, or Greek Choice of Entree Fresh Local Swordfish, grilled over oak, served on avocado salsa with green mango relish, white beans and haricot verts or Savory Pork Back Ribs, grilled over oak, served with house made BBQ sauce and shoestring potatoes Choice of Dessert Decadent Paradise Pie, McConnell’s Ice Cream, or Fresh Fruit Sorbet

702 ANACAPA STREET • PARADISECAFE.COM • (805) 962-4416 DINNER UNTIL 11PM • LUNCH • SUNDAY BRUNCH

21

••• $39.95

22 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

GIRL

by Kateri Wozny Kateri is an award-winning journalist with a

background in print, online, radio and TV news. A native of Minneapolis, MN, she has written for the Chicago Sun-Times Media Group, Pepperdine University and Acorn Newspapers. She works full time as a public relations manager locally and loves exploring the Santa Barbara fashion scene. Follow her on Twitter @kitkatwozny.

Sensual to Seduction: Chocolats du CaliBressan

L

ove is in the air and nothing says Valentine’s Day like jewelry, flowers, and my ultimate favorite, chocolates. I have a new guy in my life and wanted to do something sweet (literally) and with the big V-day coming up, I decided to stroll into one of the most popular chocolate stores in Santa Barbara: Chocolats du CaliBressan.

“Our motto is seduction of the eyes, sensation of the lips, tantalization of the tongue, heaven for the taste buds,” said owner Jean-Michel Carré.

I was definitely in the right spot for that! Carré is known as the “French Chocolatier of the America Riviera” and has been satisfying our sweet tooths worldwide since 2007.

“I really love to work with chocolate, there’s so much passion, creativity, and endless creation possibilities,” he said.

Chocolate Lover

Carré is a world-class chef in his own right. He was born to play that role, attending the prestigious Poligny culinary school in France and spent 35 years of his career working as a chef in various restaurants around France, Switzerland, England, and later venturing to San Diego and Newport Beach, where he met his wife and business partner, Jill. Although they traveled back to France to start up their own restaurant, Carré decided his calling was to make chocolate, and soon

Owner Jean-Michel is the “French Chocolatier of the American Riviera”

thereafter attended the Ecole Lenôtre school in Paris before the couple made their way back to Orange County to be near Jill’s family.

The two fell in love with Santa Barbara after a vacation and in 2007 opened up the famous chocolate shops in Carpinteria and Santa Barbara, with the former being the main location for the creation process. In case you’re wondering, Chocolats du CaliBressan translates to “The Fusion of California (Jill’s home) and Bresse, France (Carré’s homeland).

“We always wanted to live near the beach and just loved the atmosphere in Santa Barbara,” Carré said.

Indulgences

Voted Best Wine Shop for Six Years in a Row! santa barbara®

Winner

Largest selection of Central Coast wines anywhere!

Santa Barbara

®

– Cheers, Bob, Betty & Dennis Hours: Mon-Sat from 11-7, Closed Sundays 3849 State St. in La Cumbre Plaza • (805) 845-5247

Chocolats du CaliBressan carries a heavenly and unique variety of 36 chocolates, which include La Arcada Turtle (milk-chocolate ganache with Mexican milk caramel in a milkchocolate turtle shell), French Bisous (dark and milk-chocolate ganache flavored with tangerine liquor and covered with white chocolate in the shape of lips), Bressan (milk chocolate and praline spiced with nutmeg, covered in milk chocolate in the shape of a shoe) and Sichuan Pepper/Orange and Balsamic truffles. All chocolates take 3 days to make and have a shelf life of six to seven weeks.

“The flavors are very wellbalanced, not overly sweet, and have good quality of ingredients,” Carré explained. “The inspiration for the chocolate names comes from the shape or the flavor.”

Carré also features his “Chocolates of the Month” that are different from the rest. It takes him three experimental tries to get it perfect (sometimes even on the first try); if not, he sets it aside and comes back to it at a later time. This

month’s features include La Rose, a dark chocolate and spicy rose ganache, and Le Diamant Bleu, a dark chocolate and pomegranate ganache in a light-blue white-chocolate shell. For me, it was love at first taste!

“These flavors, along with the French Bisous, make a great gift for Valentine’s Day,” Carré said.

Prices range from $1.80 a piece with gift boxes ranging from $7 to $125. I bought myself a Fish (darkchocolate ganache with peanut butter in a dark chocolate fished shaped shell), Bourguignon (white-chocolate ganache with blackcurrant, covered in white chocolate), Tahitien (vanilla-flavored dark-chocolate ganache with dark chocolate) and a couple Buddha Beauty’s (salted caramel in a dark chocolate shell in the shape of a Buddha). The Buddha is also the most popular and my favorite, with the saying “Lick his belly for good luck”.

“The Buddha is the most popular because it’s a good salted caramel,” Carré said.

Sweet Sharing

Carré also shares his love by donating chocolates each week to The Dream Foundation and Flowers and Power.

He also donates to local schools and fundraisers.

“We belong to the community,” Carré said. “The more we grow, the more we can give back.”

Although Carré has a passion for his work, he hopes to retire in the next 10 years and would like to have his legacy live on by having his creations sold at worldwide retail shops.

“There are unlimited possibilities,” he said.

I left the store knowing I will definitely get a tantalizing kiss from my guy for this effort!

Chocolats du CaliBressan

Carpinteria 4193 Carpinteria Ave., suite 4 (805) 684-6900 Hours: Monday-Friday, 10 am – 6:30 pm Saturday: 10 am – 5:30 pm Santa Barbara La Arcada, 1114 State St., suite 25 (805) 568-1313 Hours: Tuesday-Friday 10:30 am – 6 pm Saturday: 10:30 am – 5 pm Sunday: 12 pm – 5 pm www.chococalibressan.com Follow on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

UP CLOSE

BY JACQUELYN DE LONGE

Our former restaurant reviewer takes a closer look at the people, places, and things that make Santa Barbara so unique. This freelance writer’s credits include Chef’s Profile for Food & Home Magazine, repeat comedic monologues for the national play, Expressing Motherhood, and many more. If she is not writing, practicing Pilates or yoga, you can find her chasing her two kids and two dogs around Santa Barbara.

Songbird Sings to Soothe the Soul

I

n an attempt to find a little piece at the end of a hectic week, I’ve been spending Sunday nights in a 90-minute yoga class and the other week this surprising thing happened: I stretched out on my mat for Savasana, closed my eyes, depended my breath, and settled into a more mindful place.

A tinkering tune coaxingly plucked on a harp started to fill the lofty room.

A powerful yet vulnerably voice paired with the growing melody and delivered touching heartfelt lyrics. At first I foolishly thought “Wow! The sound system in here is amazing!” until I realized the sound was way to good to be coming from the speakers. I peeked through the darkness and saw that one of my fellow yogis, Ana Caravelle, had set herself up in the corner of the room and was delivering a live performance on her harp just for us.

Struck by her beautiful voice, I approached her after class and a week later we got a chance to talk about who she is and how this wonderful experience came to be.

Q. You use Ana Caravelle when you are performing, yet your birth name, Anahita Navab, is as beautiful and lyrical as your stage name. Why use such a pseudonym?

A. Well, I started using it back in high school. Ana was my nickname, and Caravelle is a term for an oldfashioned Portuguese sailing ship used for exploration. I’ve always been drawn to water and its representation of change.

I was born a Pisces. and my name comes from the Iranian water goddess, Anahita, so water has a powerful connection for me.

What was your introduction to music?

When I was growing up, my dad used to collect old Persian instruments. He was a musician who could play anything by ear. He was always singing and humming around the house. There was always music.

Did you have any musical training other than your father’s? And what was it about the Harp that stood out for you?

Yes, I started taking piano lessons when I was four, then in middle school I took up the guitar, and in high school I fell in love with the harp. I’ve taken many singing lessons too, and even got a chance to sing at the Walt Disney Concert Hall when I was part of the Idyllwild Master Chorale

Local singer/songwriter Ana Caravelle with her harp on her sleeve

(laughing). Even with all those singing lessons, my voice just does what it wants.

When I was growing up, I took a lot of lessons but my parents weren’t too strict about it. They didn’t make me take any of them. I got to learn at my own pace.

You grew up in Los Angeles. How do you think it affected your creativity?

L.A. was a big part of my musical development. I was lucky to attend a high school in Culver City with an amazing music department. They really supported my curiosity. When I was attending UCLA for my undergrad, I was part of the Bulgarian choir. It is where I had access to all these different people and cultures.

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

Where does the inspiration for your songs and lyrics come from?

My most recent album, Benthic, which was just released this past year, revolves around the idea of change. There are nine songs total. Three suits of three songs that all bend into each other. The first is set from the perspective of a child and how [children] connect with others. The second group is about the experience of a new place and the feeling of a lack of control. And the third songs are about meditation and looking inside. I went on a Vipassana retreat, a 10-day silent meditation, which is when I wrote the last three songs in my head. I’m already working on the next album. Life’s experiences can be fertile ground. I’m focused on nature and man’s attempt to control.

Obviously, music is a big part of your life, but what are some of your other interests?

I’m currently in my third year of the PhD program at UCSB. I’m studying clinical psychology with a focus on kids and autism and preventative neglect.

Ultimately, I’d like to have a practice I can incorporate with my music.

Do you find a connection between your music and your current studies?

a

Absolutely! I’ll play my harp for the kids as they lay on their mats as a story is read to them. I often combine music, psychotherapy, meditation, and yoga.

They all inform each other.

I met you at a yoga class. Why play there when you seem to be a young, budding musician who could get a gig anywhere in town?

When I play during Savasana, people are in this tender space, actively in the process to listen and share. I reach auditory, spiritual, and physical levels. It has changed the way I play, making me more sensitive to my listeners. It was something I first experienced in Brett Land’s class at Yoga Soup when he had a musician perform. It was striking, and I knew I wanted to do it. Brett, Al Silva, and Eddie Ellner all let me play in their classes. Now, I’m considered the resident harpist at Yoga Soup.

So what’s next for you? What can we look forward to?

Well, Yoga Soup is holding their ninth anniversary party on [Wednesday] February 18, and I’ll be there performing.

I’m also working out the details for a solo concert here in Santa Barbara mid March and, of course, there will be some more shows in L.A.

o f f m a r k e t. o n ta r g e t.

3 7 1 7 s a n ta c l a u s l n . , c a r p i n t e r i a

You’ve sung in a few choirs. Where have you performed solo?

I’ve played at the Eagle Rock Performing Arts Center. It’s a great venue. At Lo End Theory in downtown L.A., and even the SXSW (South by Southwest) music festival in Austin, Texas.

How is it partnering up with a Los Angeles-based indie label? And where can we find you music?

Non Projects has been great. They are really focused on what the artist wants.

We’ve done three albums, and I’m starting on my fourth. For my last album, they even released it on vinyl, which you can get through their website. Otherwise, I’m on iTunes and Spotify.

How would you describe your music?

It’s folk, but more experimental folk with some avant-garde extended techniques I like to play with.

Who is your musical influence?

Icelandic music, such as, Bjork, Sigur Ros, Amina, Mum. Indie folk, like, Joanna Newsom, Beirut, and Andrew Bird. And jazz harpists Dorothy Ashby and Alice Coletrane.

Prime Santa Claus Lane Beach-front Land Sale Radius agents Austin Herlihy, Steve Brown and Chris Parker recently represented both sides in the off-market sale of this 11,800 SF beach-front parcel located just south of Santa Barbara at 3717 Santa Claus Ln. The deal included working drawings and building permits for 3 residential and 4 commercial units.

Austin Herlihy

BRE 01518112 � 805.879.9633

23

Steve Brown

BRE 00461986 � 805.879.9607

Chris Parker

BRE 01887788 � 805.879.9642

The Radius Team.

Monumental Results. Every Time.

2 0 5 E . C a r r i l l o s t. s u i t E 1 0 0 | s a n ta B a r B a r a C a 9 3 1 0 1 8 0 5 . 9 6 5 . 5 5 0 0 | r a d i u s g r o u p. C o m

24 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

STATE STREET SCRIBE

by Jeff Wing

Jeff is a journalist, raconteur, autodidact, and polysyllable enthusiast. A long-time resident of SB, he takes great delight in chronicling the lesser known facets of this gaudy jewel by the sea. Jeff can be reached at jeffwingg@gmail.com

Bottle Blondes

I

don’t want to sound peremptory, haughty, hindsighted or so brashly punctilious that my comments may be dismissed with a tongue cluck and a flapping-feather boa, but it’s hard not to notice that everyone is walking around with a clutched bottle of water.

What memo did I miss? Asteroid?

Blight? Invasion? End Times? Cormac McCarthyism? At a certain point in our recent cultural development, people began walking around like the anxious survivors of a crashed mission to Mars.

Apparently, folks are no longer able to countenance the idea of waiting for a water fountain to appear, or for the purchase of a Pepsi at the next corner market. They skulk around the streets and shopping malls, hospital waiting rooms, weddings, parent-teacher conferences, and emotionally racking death bed vigils with a stylized little plastic bottle of ordinary water. In hand!

Life, daily life, that is, has become a cheaply produced 1973 Tuesday Movie of the Week. It stars Richard Hatch, Christopher Tabori, and an increasingly hairy-headed John Saxon. It is a smallbudget cautionary tale written around commercial breaks for AeroWax (“Now with 50 percent more plastic. Ladies, we heard you.”) Salvo Tablets, Shake ‘n Bake, and with some regularity the crying Indian Chief in full headdress standing next to a freeway and staring

Santa Barbara

127 West Perdido St. Santa Barbara Ca., 93101

out at us in mute judgment, his single tear inveighing against litter as Impalas and Pintos, taunting namesakes of the formerly Fruited Plains, can be seen speeding by in the background and disgorging full grocery bags of trash out their windows. (Note to the Litter Council or whatever you were – once the White Man has stooped to infecting gift blankets with smallpox in order to kill off the nuisance Native American <1763>, we will not likely be shamed by their descendants into picking up our trash).

Then, during the same jarring commercial break, “Now, instead of counting sheep, you can count upon a good night’s sleep, from Serta!” tousled bottle-blonde Joey Heatherton yells off-key next to a showroom bed, while writhing suggestively in a painted-on knit jumper with flying-nun lapels and deeply plunging neckline, costing this 13-year-old many, many nights of sleep, and every seven days an aggregated 22 minutes or so of Tuesday Movie of the Week footage.

Oh, yeah; my bottled water lament and the Movie of the Week. The film is mesmerizing once one hurriedly returns from the Heatherton Chamber (or “bathroom” as my parents called it).

Like all good cautionary TV fables of the ‘70s, the story transfixes with its all-tooplausible portrait of a future dystopia – usually the year 1997 or so – which

Goleta

5144 Hollister Ave. Santa Barbara Ca., 93111

ecocleanerssb.com 805.884.8744

Eco friendly Dry Cleaning

better for you...your clothes...the environment...

Orders ready the next day everyday, Free pick and delivery!

portrays an Earth whose “resources” have been so denuded by Man’s greed (or Person’s greed, as Ms. Magazine would churlishly correct us all in the inevitable rejoinder) that the bland future-folk have to CARRY WATER IN THEIR HANDS ALL DAY, TAKING BLANK-FACED METRONOMIC SWIGS AS THEY WALK ALONG, LIKE SELF-OILING ROBOTS IN A REALM OF THE MECHANIZED DAMNED. Yesterday while walking along our beautiful main street, I saw a young couple with a baby in an expensivelooking stroller. That is, only the baby was in an expensive-looking stroller and

Life, daily life, that is, has become a cheaply produced 1973 Tuesday Movie of the Week

not the couple and their baby. People!

Do I have to spell this out? The hip, grizzled young dad, with his smashed beanie and standard-issue lobe-wideners took a long, luxuriating draught from a liter bottle of water, eyes closed, throat jumping up and down, and handed it to his auburn-haired gauzy-dress lady, who likewise took a long, long pull and handed the bottle back.

The day was lightly overcast and cool.

These people were not being driven by the heat into these luxuriating, slaking gulps of water. They were simply comporting with life in the West (or First World, as it’s also known) in 2014. We walk around. Holding.

Bottles. Of water. And I add all those

periods for drama and emphasis. If as you’re reading this, there are no dramaconferring periods and no sentence explaining them; my editor will have quashed that effort, and you won’t likely be seeing this bit of apologia, either.

I remember a friend in the food service business some years ago perking up when I mentioned that his establishment, a world-conquering chain of coffee shops, had begun selling their own label of bottled water, stacking them near checkout as an impulse buy.

“Why is everyone carrying water around everywhere?” I’d asked. This is about seven years ago. He’d chuckled. “We’ve been meeting about it for months,” he said. “It’s the new health buzzword – hydration.” He was as amused and flummoxed as I. Maybe even more so, having taken endless meetings on the subject of how best to capitalize on a marketing rollout of Suggestive Asinine Thirst (my term).

At the Ralph’s near our house, there are pallets of bottled water stacked outside as one would expect in the days preceding a visibly oncoming apocalypse.

IT IS WATER, FOLKS. Here’s a revolutionary, possibly dangerous idea.

If you’re thirsty, take a drink. Otherwise, just continue promenading down the block with your free hands swinging.

To the rest of you, I will say this: your macabre thirstless auto-sipping is the stuff of a David Lynch student film. We can do better.

And the miles-deep stratum of lil’ plastic bottles the future archaeologists will unearth in 9,000 years? The discovery will deepen a mystery it is not in our interest to have solved. Let’s keep this embarrassing little episode a 21stcentury secret, shall we?

Join us for some warm Irish hospitality, authentic food and excellent pints.

$10 daily lunch menu featuring over 13 items.

18 E ORTEGA ST., SANTA BARBARA • 11:302:00AM EVERY DAY 805-568-0702 • www.dargans.com •

FULL SERVICE MAINTENANCE & REPAIR Established 1978

Muller & Go s s

Locally Owned

IMPORT AUTO REPAIR Specializing In

Mercedes • BMW•Audi Rolls Royce• Mini•VW

962-1613

www.mullerandgoss.com

424 N. Quarantina Santa Barbara, CA

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

SYVSNAPSHOT

by Eva Van Prooyen Keeping a finger on the pulse of the Santa Ynez Valley: what to eat, where to go, who to meet, and what to drink. Pretty much everything and anything situated between the Santa Ynez and San Rafael Mountains that could tickle one’s interest.

All You Need is Love, Wine, Brunch, and a Pop-Up Chapel “25 years of love” – Rod and Shawn Board renewed their vows with their daughters at last year’s Casa Dumetz pop-up Valentine’s Day chapel. “It was so sweet and sincere,” says ordained minister Angie Horn.

F

ourteen miles north of Buellton in the quaint, rustic, historic town of Los Alamos, lovers, romantics, friends, newly betrothed, long-term relationship ninjas, and destination wedding ceremony seekers will find a pop-up chapel at Casa Dumetz Wines Tasting Room and Babi’s Beer Emporium on Valentine’s Day from 12 pm to 5 pm (Saturday, February 14).

Situated on Bell Street, the tiny town’s main thoroughfare, ordained ministers Ordained ministers and best friends Angie Horn and Angie Horn and Jessy Osehan report Jessy Osehan will officiate at a pop-up chapel in Los they will officiate “a variety of ceremonies Alamos on Valentine’s Day to celebrate all kinds of love: friendship, engagements, weddings, vow renewals, or making a grand apology.”

Casa Dumetz Wines Tasting Room and Babi’s Beer Emporium owner, winemaker, and craft/artisan beer huntress, Sonja Magdevski, focuses on hand-crafted, smalllot, small productions of Rhone varietals showcasing Santa Barbara County’s fruit from premier vineyards. She also stocks 40 to 60 bottles of craft brew, along with six beers on tap. “Anyone who wants to celebrate love can drop in or make an advance reservation,” says Angie, adding, “or just come get a glass of wine and celebrate love by being there to watch the ceremonies.” Wedding services are $75, and to make it “official” couples must have a marriage license in hand. All other celebrations are $25.

Angie and Jessy became friends 10 years ago while attending seminary at Haggard School of Theology-Azusa Pacific University, “and now we run the Hamlet Inn in Solvang. We love wine and celebrations, so this pop-up chapel is a beautiful combination of the two!”

This will be the second year in a row for their Casa Dumetz pop-up chapel.

Last year, Angie says they officiated 10 vow-renewal ceremonies, adding “some participants came with vows written ahead of time, others showed up and shared from the heart on the spot. We have prepared easy-to-use celebration outlines that can be personalized in the moment.”

If you’d like to make a reservation or discuss ceremony options, email Angie and Jessy at info@thehamletinn.com.

Casa Dumetz Wines and Babi’s Beer Emporium are located at 388 and 448 Bell Street in Los Alamos. Open Friday-Saturday 11 am to 7 pm, Sunday 11 am to 6 pm, and Monday-Thursday by appointment. www.casadumetzwines.com (805) 344-1900

Eva’s Top Five Faves

My personal picks, best bets, hot tips, save the dates, and things not to miss!

Start Training: Santa Barbara Wine Country Half Marathon is May 9 Prepare to run the scenic 13.1-mile course that winds its way through vineyards, ranches, farms, lavender fields, orchards, and tiny towns, all culminating in a grand finish at the center of the traditional Danish village-styled town of Solvang. A training plan and mileby-mile course description can be found at www.destinationraces.com/runsb

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

25

Blind Tasting Thursdays at Wandering Wine Dog – Swirl, sniff, sip, guess, rinse, and repeat. It’s a brown-bagged, blind wine tasting throw-down every Thursday.

Challenge your palate; learn about wine, and see how well you remember what these wines taste like and where they come from. Cost is $15, no reservations required.

539 C Mission Dr. in Solvang, anytime between 4 pm and 7 pm; (805) 686-9126 www.wanderingdogwinebar.com Sunday Brunch going, going... almost (temporarily) gone! – Civilized Sunday mornings are for mimosas and brunch. The Willows, Chumash Casino Resort’s fine-dining, four-star restaurant, will be closing down for renovations, so you have until March 15 to cannonball into this decadent and overflowing Sunday brunch featuring made-to-order omelets, a cold seafood bar, caviar, king crab legs, sushi, hand-carved prime rib, ingredients from local farms, ranches, and gardens, signature cocktails, and an eye-widening array of sweets. Sundays, 10 am-2 pm. $59.95 per person. Chumash Casino Resort, 3400 East Highway 246, Santa Ynez, (805) 686-0855 Calling all chefs to turn up the heat for Chili Cook-off – Hey hot stuff, get your recipe ready and sign up for the 2nd Annual Santa Ynez Valley Grange Chili Cook-Off renovation fundraiser. The Grange interior has been completely renovated and now it is time for the exterior; proceeds will go to painting the outside and renovating the backyard. Send entries to pigdog13@mac.com. The deadline to sign up is Friday, February 13. The chili cook-off tasting and competition will be held Saturday, February 21, at 6 pm. $20 per person, 2374 Alamo Pintado Road in Los Olivos. www.santaynezvalleygrange.org Delicious Points North – If your taste buds can make it past the Rotisserie Pork Salad and Meatloaf Sandwich on Ciabatta, a much-anticipated favorite post-wine-tasting snack for me is the Charcuterie and Cheese Plate at Bell Street Farm in Los Alamos. It’s a happy selection of meats, cheeses, “House Country Paté”, whole-grain mustard, honey, and olives, served on a rustic serving board. 406 Bell Street in Los Alamos, www.bellstreetfarm.com, (805) 344-4609

26 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

Santa Barbara's Finest Sensual Boutiques Dare to explore this Valentines Day. Treat each other to the most romantic night.

You’ll love each other for it.

And Because We Love You...

You’ll Receive this free gift with every $70 purchase!

405 State St. (805) 965-9363

223 Anacapa St. (805) 963-9222

4135 State St. (805) 967-8282

Text ‘SBTOYS’ to 24-587 for a 20% discount!

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

CINEMA SCOPE

by James Luksic A longtime writer, editor and film critic, James has

worked nationwide for several websites and publications – including the Dayton Daily News, Key West Citizen, Topeka Capital-Journal and Santa Ynez Valley Journal.

California is his eighth state. When he isn’t watching movies or sports around the Central Coast, you can find James writing and reading while he enjoys coffee and bacon, or Coke and pizza.

Down Time

W

ith the Academy Awards slated for Sunday, February 22, now seems as good a time as any to break from Oscar-mania and deign to inferior flicks – typical of this time of year – serving as place-holders in Central Coast theaters. A smattering of Oscar-nominated films are showing around town, so there’s still time to catch The Imitation Game, Birdman, American Sniper, and Whiplash (returning to Plaza de Oro).

Otherwise, perhaps the less said in this corner about nominees and categories, the better. I’m staggered that The Lunchbox wasn’t on the Academy’s radar for Best Foreign Language picture; maybe there’s an aversion to heartfelt, subtly profound, and enriching stories about everyday people. With all due respect to Best Actor front-runners Michael Keaton and Eddie Redmayne, my favorite performance of 2014 belonged to India’s Irrfan Khan.

Down-shifting gears: Having not read the wildly popular 50 Shades of Grey, I can’t share the enthusiasm (or dread?) of its devotees. The timing of the movie’s release, along with everything in Hollywood, isn’t coincidental: nothing says Valentine’s Day like bondage and sadomasochism. The daring filmmakers are counting on a no-name cast that includes Jamie Dornan (who?) and Dakota Johnson (whose player in The Social Network, it’s worth mentioning, slept with billionaire Sean Parker) to carry the box-office burden. Despite its inevitable plot holes, will the picture become a guilty pleasure, along the lines of Basic Instinct? Or could it become a laughingstock – but eventually develop a cult following – as did Showgirls? My enthusiasm is limited and well-contained.

Meanwhile, this unremarkable foursome awaits your money:

Mad Hatter

I

couldn’t help but mutter to myself during the opening minutes of Blackhat, when the camera swoops and swerves through electrical wires and the “guts” of a computer, as if doing so was some type of groundbreaking special effect. But then, in general, this movie – despite its sleek beauty – marks a short step down for Michael Mann, who helmed the masterful Heat and underrated The Insider.

Chris Hemsworth, who has made a strong impression as Thor and – more notably – in Rush, wouldn’t have been my first choice to portray a computer-hacking legend. That won’t stop the Feds for offering our hero a deal to “commute” his prison sentence, if he’s willing to cooperate in finding an wide-reaching cybercrime network.

The furloughed convict soon teams with everyone from Viola Davis to Tang Wei (the token sexy, brainy Asian) while venturing from Chicago and L.A. to China and Indonesia.

Blackhat can’t be considered original and isn’t much of a cautionary tale, but Mann coaxes proficiency out of a mostly unknown cast, and the camerawork holds our interest during action sequences. In any case, the circumstances and consequences needn’t have occupied the screen for upward of 2 hours and 15 minutes.

Piece of Cake

I

n Cake, Jennifer Aniston plays acid-tongued, pill-popping Claire who – despite undergoing rigorous physical therapy – becomes fixated with a young lady (Anna Kendrick), essentially going to waste in a marginal role) who committed suicide.

Given the heroine’s smarmy attitude, she won’t last long in a local support group (moderated by Felicity Huffman, a fine actress who serves little purpose this time).

An excursion to Mexico for meds will supply culture and flavor, plus the routine legal entrapments all movie characters seem to encounter at Border Patrol.

There isn’t much new going on (to quote one participant, “It’s not very original”) as Claire laments her past (“I was a good mother”). What’s baffling is how some observers say this is a “defining” or revelatory role for Aniston, as if folks were somehow unaware of her genuine talent until this melodramatic bit of business.

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

27

Her comedic timing and unspoiled emotions, from Friends to The Break-Up, are rarely surpassed. With or without its headlining actress, Cake proves as suitable for Oprah’s OWN as for the silver screen.

Time After Time

P

roject Almanac gets its title from a top-secret scheme uncovered in the basement of a deceased father’s basement, after his son (Johnny Weston, a revelation in Chasing Mavericks) and daughter stumble upon their dad’s videocam in the attic. The Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew can’t compare to these teen sleuths. Archival footage of the hero’s seventh birthday – shot a decade earlier – reveals a modern-day image of him standing in the background.

The brilliant protagonist not only sets his cap for MIT but an appealing classmate (Sofia Black-D’Elia) who joins his band of computer geeks, including his sister who’s relegated to operating the annoying hand-cam. Be warned: the invention of time travel herein won’t be strong enough to overcome the careening, wobbly, motion-sickness photographic equipment.

Director Dean Israelite endeavors to enhance his coming-of-age premise with a slew of special effects, replays, flashbacks and – most damnable of all – a gigantic gap in logic: the students’ technical tinkering has allegedly impacted catastrophes (plane crashes, fatal fires) around the world. Project preposterous.

Bore Next Door

T

he Boy Next Door sells itself as a psychological thriller about an ostensibly single mom (Jennifer Lopez, the antithesis of a girl next door) who instantly falls for a hunky young neighbor (Ryan Guzman) while her estranged husband (John Corbett) resurfaces for a second chance.

The titular heartthrob befriends the heroine’s teenage son and soon poisons the family’s well. This guy, we’re led to believe, can fix garage doors and cars – while reciting excerpts of The Illiad – but plays dumb when defrosting a chicken. When our lust-struck teacher arrives in his kitchen at a moment’s notice, it isn’t long before all sex breaks loose, as do clichés and absurdities.

Lopez, generally interesting to observe and listen to, effortlessly trumps her counterpart as a bookworm who fancies literary classics; watching a “hunky” mechanic type such as Guzman try to ruminate about The Odyssey is a real howler.

(As it stands, the 27-year-old actor barely convinces as a high schooler.) Kristin Chenowith ebbs and flows as the leading lady’s friend and vice principal, though Corbett acquits himself well amid harrowing and hollow conditions.

Director Rob Cohen, perhaps more comfortable with action (The Fast and the Furious) becomes ga-ga and googly-eyed over the attractive co-stars and their devious shenanigans. If Cohen and screenwriter Barbara Curry were aiming Cupid’s arrow toward a twist on Fatal Attraction, they’ve missed the mark in exasperating fashion; the upshot is a broken bow.

INTERMEZZO & A MOVIE +

+

+

BURGERS • GOURMET FLATBREADS • APPETIZERS FULL LIQUOR • SPECIALTY COCKTAILS LOCAL WINES BY THE GLASS

819 ANACAPA STREET

HOURS: MON - SAT FROM 4PM TO CLOSE SAT LUNCH: 12PM - 4PM / CLOSED SUNDAY

28 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

You Have Your Hands Full

by Mara Peters Former editor for the fashion/lifestyle section of the New York

Post, Mara moved to London and worked as a contributing editor for the Daily Mail’s You Magazine, freelancing for Look Magazine, NY Post and the Style Magazine for The Sunday Times. To remain sane during diaper years she writes a mommy blog, You Have Your Hands Full – www.handsfullsb.com.

I Swear We Are Normal

“S

o there he was dropping the F-bomb at a party,” my friend was telling me, over a cup of coffee, about her son, my son’s best friend. “We gave him a choice: Tabasco or soap. He chose Tabasco.”

I looked at her and nodded in approval. I was the supportive parent/ friend as she was putting it out there.

Clearly she had reached her limit, and it was time to lay down the law.

Music to my ears, of course. I’m all for extreme punishment. Alpha and I are old school: we spank our kids when the circumstances warrant it. It’s always a challenge matching the punishment to the crime, and I’m certain the kids would argue we’ve erred on the side of being too severe.

But there is a particular rub with the whole swearing thing. “I thought it was something you would do,” she smiled at me. “You inspire me Mara, really.”

That is when my eyes started to shift. It was hard to look her in the eyes. I took a gulp of my coffee hoping that the conversation would change.

Because the swearing in my house has hit all-time highs. And what’s even worse? It’s with my full support; in fact, I’m the ringleader.

It all started in Schatzle class. We had killed ourselves, burned our buns, sprinted around the block,

Our mornings are definitely more positive

done an insane number of sit-ups, and lunged until there was no way to lunge another lunge. Beet-red in the face and tired as hell, Jenny put that microphone on and started to lecture us about positivity.

Wake up in the morning, she advised us, jump out of bed and start your day right. So as we closed class, we did a few inhales and exhales, and I thought we were bringing it into prayer position for a Namaste when she shouted out, “F*CK IT ALL, I AM GOING TO

Mosquito Control

HAVE A GREAT DAY.” That night, over dinner, it came up: Schatzle, positivity and, well, F*ck it all, I am going to have a great day. The kids’ jaws dropped to the floor as they listened to the story. Laughter ensued and all of us jumped from the table a little lighter.

“Guys, I have an idea…” I started in at cleanup. “Why don’t we try that every morning and see if it works?”

“You mean using that word?” my kindergartener asked me. “The one that we are not supposed to use?”

“Yes, the F-word. Use it every morning when you jump out of bed and tell me if it makes you feel better,” I said, throwing all caution to the wind.

The next morning, Alpha and I were fast asleep when we heard the rallying cry ring across the house. “F*CK IT ALL, I AM GOING TO HAVE A GREAT DAY!” Alpha, who had missed the dinner session, sat bolt upright in bed. “Did you hear that?” he asked me.

I started to giggle as we heard it repeated from each child. And then the laughter. That was last week. Now it has become the new morning ritual

at the Peters house.

Over pancakes just this morning, a tired Olivia walked into the kitchen and quietly sat down at the table.

“F*ckitallIamgoingtohaveagreatday,” she mumbled in an unenergetic whisper.

“Where is the Tabasco sauce?” I asked Alpha. “Someone just used the F-word in this house.” She quickly snapped her head up from her plate, shocked. She looked at my insistent face, and it registered quickly. Shouting at the top of her lungs, “F*CKITALLIAMGOINGTOHAVEAGREATDAY!” she burst into a huge smile.

“That’s better, Liv,” I told her.

“Don’t get me wrong here, you are lucky and privileged to be able to use the F-word every morning. Treat it with respect.”

I couldn’t help but catch Alpha’s eye. The eyebrows were raised. Indeed, we are in unchartered waters. But one thing I know for sure. If we are going to do something, we do it well.

“We have to set some standards in the house,” I simply stated, flipping the pancakes.

Peters Pick I thought it was only fitting (after the column I just wrote) to write about the fact that we need to continue to re-enforce values to our kids that are outside of their comfort zones. I am not talking about academics, sports, or the arts. While they’re young, some of the most important life experiences will shape and form their perception of the world. That is where the Mansbach family comes in. Their son Jacob has connected his interest of triathlons to a bigger issue: hunger. He has raised money for the last three years for the Foodbank. Joining Jacob is not just a summer project. The second Saturday of every month, you can join him at the Santa Barbara Foodbank. Help sort food and learn about the real issues that can shape your own child’s values while developing empathy. For more information, contact Jennifer Mansbach, jen@mansbach.com.

Got Gophers?

Serving Santa Barbara and Ventura Counties since 1990

Free Estimates

Multi-Residential, Commercial, Office, Industrial & Warehouse Properties Single Family Homes

Voted #1 Termite & Pest Control Company Termite Inspections - Repairs • Ticks carry the devastating Lyme Disease • Decks, Doors, and Windows • Fleas carry multiple diseases • 55 diseases are transmitted by rodents to children / adults • 1 in 5 fires are caused by rodents • Roaches cause many forms of Asthma • live Animal Trapping

805-687-6644

Free Estimates

Bilingual staff, efficient, professional & friendly service Cutting edge web-based software, online reports, easy rent payment options CA Brokers License #004003028 Kevin O’Connor President

www.hydrexnow.com

Mary and John Cochrane, Owners

“Call to find out how we can better manage your investment property!”

(805) 965-2887 x117 john@cochranepm.com

www.cochranepm.com

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

29

D.on Darox & the Melody Joy Bakers are true nomads to their gypsy souls

by Tommie Vaughn Tommie adapted her love of the stage to the love of the

page. As lead singer for the band Wall of Tom, she created This Rock in My Heart and This Roll in My Soul, a fictional book series based loosely on her experiences in the L.A. music scene. Now she’s spending her time checking out and writing about all things Santa Barbara. Reach Tommie at www.TommieV.com or follow her on Twitter at TommieVaughn1.

Peddlers of a Song

I

am all alone, my heart is my string and I dangle it in front of you, all around you, as you walk through the dusty streets, past the carrots, past the kale – my song calls out to you.

Is it familiar? Do I bring forth a memory? Or does it evoke a feeling; stir some small place inside you, enough to make you stop in your path, to turn my way? Yes, it’s my soul on this sidewalk that I bleed for you. Won’t you take a listen? Won’t you hear my song? I am a street performer. Most of you will walk right past me, without a second look. So I play my song to no one yet to everyone, hoping to entice you, if even but for a moment. Won’t you hear my song?

This is only a fraction of the poetic nonsense that begins to filter through my head upon entering Santa Barbara’s finest Farmers Market every Tuesday as music fills the air from booth to booth.

Senses are captured by every color, smell and beautiful sound that floats past my hungry ears. Although I am here for the farm fresh organic vegetables, but it is the music that fills my heart – and so I keep showing up, again and again, to awaken with the street sounds, as the peddlers of song vie for attention… for acceptance and a smile.

They Did it All for the Nookie

Did you think I was going to say dollar? Sure, the performers would love for you to pay for their song. I mean hey, does anyone pay for music anymore?

Mine’s all streaming for free, just like most artists these days. Why would we need to eat? What those performers on every half-block really want is for you to hear, for you to feel – and if their song can take you there, that’s an accomplishment that only the fearless will understand.

Most street performers are everyday musicians just practicing their craft. Bob Dylan used to do it; for tips or the sheer fun of it, he would strum his guitar with the other performers at Washington Square Park. B.B. King was just a boy when he would take to the streets of Mississippi for spare change, and with that he would sometimes travel to four towns a day – until he happened into Memphis, and the world of blues and jazz would never sound the same again.

And we all love the story of Jewel, who

Pacific Haze has Americana spirit and a whole lot of hair

Ocho the Owl is looking for that magical 87 percent

slept in her van just so she could spend her days singing in the streets, till her crooked teeth and unforgettable voice would capture the hearts of San Diego small-club owners and one important executive of Atlantic Records.

Dancing in the Streets

So today, I will introduce you to a few of our sidewalk heroes. Musicians that frequent our streets, our markets, and our hearts – all for a chance to capture our imaginations, take us away from the Brussels sprouts and to sing their songs.

For D.on Darox & the Melody Joy Bakers, the market is a weekly stop in his day-to-day routine of street performing.

He plays with his three piece, a full band, or solo depending on the day, time and venue, traveling far from his home in Tennessee – finding himself a modern-day nomad as he plays up and down the southern coast of California.

As their take of “Dirty, Gypsy, Blues” begins with a heartbreakingly whimsical accordion intro and D.on’s gravely voice booming you to attention, the original music takes hold of your soul, sweeping your mind back to New Orleans, Bourbon Street, to a carefree time of a true musical independent spirit.

Ocho the Owl strums proud and alone on a wooden box with his ukulele tucked close to his heart, as he sings his songs smiling shyly at a sign that reads: “87% of people who’ve listened

Johnny Miller stands alone with mountains of musical charisma

to this performer’s music have had the uncontrollable urge to dance, dance, dance! (And then tip generously).” He travels locally from farmers markets to test new songs, and to entice a new fan base for local singer/songwriter performances.

Near the pubs, Pacific Haze is here again, twiddling with their twist on Americana Blues, making the dirty hipsters stop to tap a toe as the banjo takes a ride with a fiddle, a guitar, and a harmonica on their bushy beards and

crooked moustaches. The harmonies are well-blended and the crowd is theirs for the taking, as small children dance a jig in the street at the musicians’ feet.

As I move toward my favorite flower seller, I notice a young, cleancut fella singing a Johnny Cash tune with a voice so deep and resonant, it would make the Man in Black proud.

Johnny Miller is not your typical street performer, and he typically looks so professional; perhaps he was just slumming it for the afternoon after his stressful day on the catwalk. As he strums his acoustic guitar and tips his hat to the harmonica, he exudes all the charisma that any street performer needs, dirty or not. Johnny usually plays open mics or club gigs with his full backing band. Today, he just wanted to play and the SB Farmers Market seemed to be the perfect stage to test out new songs.

So as each week passes, it will never be the same as new faces come, old faces move on and a corner band is breaking down the walls of normality, all for a dollar – maybe a record deal, or maybe just some whiskey that will be the muse of inspiration for the next song in their musical Rolodex.

State Street Farmers Market is every Tuesday, from 3 to 6:30 pm winter hours, and 4 to 7:30 pm in the summer.

30 |

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

...continued from p.14

Taking Wing

Your piece on Trader Joe’s could not be about the same TJ’s that I have happily shopped in for 15 years (in different locations). It is a spoof and unfunny caricature and gives off a totally false view of a grocery store where thousands of non-tattooed shoppers and workers enjoy whatever they do without bugging [one another].

In fact, most shoppers actually enjoy their otherwise boring job of going for necessary items to live well.

You are sounding like a Scrooge, only Christmas is past. (What’s your problem with ink?)

Sincerely, Jane Fehrenbacher Santa Barbara P.S. My husband remarked: “[Wing] must be trying to use every adjective he knows.”

Seeing Greene

When I read [Jeff Harding’s] opinions stated in your article “Ineptocracy” (Sentinel #4/2), I could not help but think of the article by Yahoo journalist Adrain Cudler: Jeff Greene is a billionaire who made most of his fortune shorting subprime mortgages ahead of the last recession.

Greene took a private jet to this year’s World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, along with his wife, children and two nannies, and then told Bloomberg News that “America’s lifestyle expectations are far too high and need to be adjusted so we have less things and a smaller, better existence.

We need to reinvent our whole system of life.”’

Your opinions and comments remind me of Mr. Greene’s slip from reality.

Mr. Harding, President Obama is not robbing from the rich and giving to the poor. And, as a nation we will not falter because we try to balance

resources. The current state of strife is due to this very same imbalance. The top five percent keep robbing everyone and everything around them, and this must stop if we are to continue to be a leading nation. My opinion is there are many people with your belief system who fail to employ the necessary critical thinking skills required to create a nation where every person is a productive, self-sustaining individual able to live a healthy life.

Mr. Harding, the remainder of the 95 percent of Americans are not functioning to full capacity and leading productive, healthy lives. It shows in every area of our economy. We have very little creativity, innovation, and the other items required for growth.

Instead, as a nation we experience stagnation and deterioration as is shown in our aging infrastructure, which for whatever reason we cannot agree on providing the funds for upkeep and maintenance. This is not because we do not have the funds. The reason is the few in charge would rather provide raises, stipends, and other tax loopholes instead of taking care of the nation’s foundation. At least Mr. Obama tries to address these issues, even if there are too many people thinking like you Mr. Harding who try to shoot his ideas down every step of the way.

My thought is either “Piss or get off the pot!” If you cannot provide solutions, get out of the way, but do not become an obstruction to possible progress. The current ways are not working. I understand this is part of the economic wave; we have business cycles that we must deal with in industry, housing, and other parts that comprise our economy. The current cycle is stale, and we must change if we are going to come out healthy and vibrant. Thank you for reading my thoughts.

Lourdes Armas Santa Barbara

Minimum Myths

In your [publication] on January 10, Mr. Jeff Harding had another myth dispelled on raising minimum wage. He believes: “Most minimumwage workers are not employed by big corporations; rather, it’s about 50-50 between small businesses and large businesses.”

Jeff’s talking point that we shouldn’t raise the minimum wage because 50 percent of low-wage workers are employed by small businesses can be put to rest and added to the long list of dispelled carefully orchestrated corporatism lies promulgated by the right-wing echo chamber.

A new study by The National Employment Law Center has published a list of the 50 American companies [that] have the most lowwage workers and share the common traits of being big, established successful companies rake in healthy profits and large margins from their low-wage workers.

The most significant finding of the study is that a large majority, 66 percent of low-wage workers are not employed by small businesses, but instead by large corporations with top executive compensations averaging $9.4 million.

Similar to the way Republican politicians and pundits argue that we shouldn’t raise the income-tax rate on the top bracket of Americans because most small business owners file as individuals and fall under that bracket, (well, they considered the Koch brothers to be small-business

owners), this is similar attempt to scare America into falsely believing that a small raise in the minimum wage will lead to small businesses firing millions of low-wage workers.

In order to make this lie work, Jeff’s false claim that “50 percent of low-wage workers are employed by small businesses.” Sadly, one can only assume that Mr. Harding is deceiving us and hurting the best interest of millions of minimum-wage workers.

The study also notes that these 50 largest employers of low-wage workers have mostly recovered from the recession and are in strong financial positions: 92 percent were profitable last year; 78 percent have been profitable in the last three years; 75 percent have higher revenues now than before the Bush recession; 73 percent have higher cash holdings; and 63 percent have higher operating margins.

So, the largest companies in America have recovered from the recession and are enjoying record profits and sitting on the record amounts of cash. In the meantime, they are paying their wholly owned corporate subsidiaries, the GOP and Fox News, to inject this lie into the American psyche in order to ensure that they can continue to exploit low-wage labor.

Finally, we cannot allow shameless Republican politicians and moneyhungry pundits to continue to spread dangerous falsehoods that do a large part in holding the American worker back from receiving adequate compensation, while these multinational corporations have their

Observations from Paradise by Genivieve Le Duc

8 0 5 . 8 4 5 .1 6 7 3 | 1 3 3 E A S T D E L A G U E R R A S T R E E T | N O.1 8 2 | S A N TA B A R B A R A

own self-serving capitalist concerns.

Pundits and politicians who operate inside the public sphere should always have the American people at the forefront of their conscience, not those of corporate campaign donors.

Sincerely, Leoncio Martins Montecito (Jeff Harding responds: Leoncio, we just aren’t going to agree on this topic.

I’ve tried to be polite in my discussions with you, but nothing I say is going to change your views on minimum wages.

I think you have mischaracterized what I said, and you have crafted an argument and data to suit your point.

Nothing in your letter has refuted any of the underlying points I make about minimum wage. As I pointed out in my letter to Doug Pocius, the real reason behind minimum-wage legislation is social welfare, and it is not based on economics. It’s just another way to redistribute wealth in our society.

My point is that minimum wage is ultimately harmful to the economy, and those people who need jobs and are willing to work for lower wages. If you wish to give welfare to low-income workers, minimum wage is the wrong approach. You obviously disagree with my conclusions. So be it.

Thanks for writing in. – J.H.)

F E B R UA RY 7 – 2 1 | 2 0 1 5

31

On the Money

In a pure free-market economy, employers who paid less than a living wage would soon find that no one could afford to work for them, and the true cost of hiring a worker would be found. It’s a fact that this cost would be higher than the one business is now paying. Minimum-wage workers and the businesses they work for are currently subsidized by society, which breaks the rules The Capitalist is supposed to play by.

John Lyon Santa Barbara

Santa Barbara Seafood Pasta

Fresh Fish and Succulent Shrimp simmered with tomato, vegies, fresh basil & garlic tossed with Fusilli pasta & topped with shredded Parmesan.

EARTHQUAKE RETROFITTING 50 + YEARS EXPERIENCE - LOCAL 35+ YEARS

11

• FLOOR LEVELING • TREE TRIMMING & SCULPTING • FOUNDATION REPLACEMENTS • FOUNDATIONS REPAIRS • EPOXY INJECTION • RETAINING WALLS • FRENCH DRAINS – WATERPROOFING • SITE DRAINAGE SYSTEMS • UNDERPINNINGS – CAISSONS • STRUCTURAL CORRECTION WORK • CONCRETE DRIVEWAYS

$

99

805.698.4318

FREE INSPECTION

Division of William J. Dalziel & Assoc., Inc Lic#B414749 – Bonded & Insured visit our site at:

www.williamjdalziel.com billdalziel@yahoo.com

Lunch •

D i n n e r • P r i vat e Pa r t i e s

Reservations • (805) 564-1200 • Free Valet Parking • By The Boats 113 Harbor Way • chuckswaterfrontgrill.com • endlesssummerbarcafe.net

E X PE RT I S E Expert advice.

Comprehensive solutions.

Extraordinary results.

Helping to optimize your financial success.

©Richard Schloss

Tax • Audit • Estate Planning • Business Consulting • Cost Segregation • Litigation Support • ERP & CRM Software w w w. b p w. c o m | (805) 963-7811 | Santa Barbara, CA

NEW LISTING

ELEGANCE NEAR THE BEACH | WEB: 0632241 | $4,950,000 Diane Randall 805.705.5252, Maureen McDermut 805.570.5545

ENCHANTING HACIENDA | WEB: 0113829 | $4,825,000 Maureen McDermut 805.570.5545, Bob Lamborn 805.689.6800

DRAMATIC CONTEMPORARY | WEB: 0632331 | $3,495,000 David Mires 805.705.8986, Dick Mires 805.689.7771

NEW PRICE

FABULOUS BEACH GETAWAY | WEB: 0113869 | $3,295,000 Maureen McDermut 805.570.5545

MONTECITO PANORAMIC VIEWS | WEB: 0592884 | $2,395,000

OCEAN VIEW CONTEMPORARY | WEB: 0592892 | $1,695,000

Paula Goodwin 805.451.5699, Barbara Green 805.452.9003

Justin Corrado 805.451.9969

NEW LISTING

ESSENCE OF SAN ROQUE | WEB: 0592850 | $1,095,000 Francie Berezo 805.705.2561

370 BEECH COURT | WEB: 0592914 | $629,000 Michael Nicassio 805.698.2253

CHIC CONDO ON GOLF COURSE | WEB: 0592887 | $525,000

Francie Berezo 805.705.2561

SANTA YNEZ VALLEY LISTINGS NEW PRICE

VINEYARD ESTATE | WEB: 0621595 | $2,995,000 Laura Drammer 805.448.7500

NEW LISTING

BALLARD SCHOOL DISTRICT | WEB: 0621625 | $1,795,000 Patty Murphy 805.680.8571

SANTA BARBARA AREA BROKERAGES | sothebyshomes.com/santabarbara | sothebyshomes.com/santaynez MONTECITO - COAST VILLAGE ROAD | MONTECITO - UPPER VILLAGE SANTA BARBARA STATE STREET | SANTA YNEZ VALLEY

COUNTRY FARM HOUSE | WEB: 0621631 | $1,200,000 Patty Murphy 805.680.8571

Sotheby’s International Realty and the Sotheby’s International Realty logo are registered (or unregistered) service marks used with permission. Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. Real estate agents affiliated with Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc. are independent contractor sales associates and are not employees of Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.