Brilliant Thoughts

from a knee-in-the-neck on May 25, 2020 in Minneapolis. HAZARD (Continued from page 19) Brilliant Thoughts Nearly 100% of Americans support the 1 st Amendment right of all Americans to peacefully protest, but not to rob, loot, assault local storekeepers and burn down by Ashleigh Brilliant their private property without penalty, and without promised police protection. Born London, 1933. Mother Canadian. Father a British civil servant. World War The primary role of government at all levels is to protect and preserve the safety and security of all citizens, regardless of color, race, or creed. Nearly 100% of Americans favor bi-partisan leadership and cooperation in II childhood spent mostly in Toronto and Washington, D.C. Berkeley PhD. in American History, 1964. Living in Santa Barbara since 1973. No children. Best-known for his illustrated epigrams, called “Pot-Shots”, now a series of 10,000. Email ashleigh@west.net or visit www.ashleighbrilliant.com Congress. What happened to the days when two affable Irishmen – Ronald Reagan and “Tip” O’Neill – could debate by day, then sit down over dinner with a bottle of port and craft legislation that both leaders could live with? Today, Good Brief red and blue voters may live in the same neighborhoods, but political discourse among friends too often descends into acrimonious and distasteful bitterness. Nearly 100% of Americans believe that the proper pathway for disadvantaged W hen General Sir Charles Napier captured, for the British Empire, the Indian “O P Q R S T.” This was correctly interpreted to say, in French, “Au Peku arresté” minorities is a strong educational experience, coupled with teaching traditional province of Sindh (now a part of (“Arrested at Peku.”) American values and principles. Pakistan) in 1844, he reportedly Another celebrated wartime

Nearly 100% of Americans support legal immigration but disagree as to how announced this achievement in a report, using only one more word many slots should be based on merit vs. family relationships. Nearly all oppose one-word telegram. That single word than Caesar’s three, was radioed, open borders for drug dealers, terrorists, sex slaves, and criminals. was not English, but, in those days, in January 1942, by Donald Francis

Nearly 100% of Americans support robust job growth, which allows minority when every upper-class Englishman Mason, the pilot of a U.S. coastal workers to escape the binding chains of welfare and lifetime imprisonment in received a classical education, the reconnaissance light bomber, after urban ghettos. message would have been intelligible an encounter in the North Atlantic

Rodney King got it right back in the 1992 when riots and looting shook Los to any reader who knew Latin. But with a surfaced German submarine. It Angeles. He asked, “Why can’t we all just get along?” It is important to view the even if they understood the word, said: “SIGHTED SUB, SANK SAME.” world through the windshield rather than through the rear-view mirror. We show they wouldn’t have grasped its meanThis received wide publicity, at a time weakness when we do not work together, or function as a team, or adhere to the ing in this context, unless they also when America had just entered the principles of individual freedom and personal responsibility as laid down by our realized that it was a pun. The word war, and morale-boosters of every forefathers who went to war to create and preserve this less-than-perfect union. was, “PECCAVI,” which in Latin kind were much in demand. (Which means “I have sinned.” (“Sinned” – makes me wonder if any special haiku What to Do to End the Rioting “Sindh” – Get it?) were written in Japan, celebrating the and Pull this Nation Together Again The only problem with this anecdote – which I actually learned as fact, successful attack on Pearl Harbor.) The only problem with that sub

Here is a twofold “Hazard” Plan for President Donald Trump to implement in History class at school – is that it is story is that, according to official tomorrow: not true. The truth appears to be that German records, no U-boats were

As president of all 331 million Americans, including 44 million African the story was first printed in Punch reported missing that day. However, Americans, Donald Trump needs to arrange a nationally televised meeting at Magazine, which had received the idea, as has often been said, in war, Truth is the White House, for a listening conversation with selected Black activist proby mail, from a 16-year-old English the first casualty. testors and agitators to find out exactly what it is they specifically want. He also girl named Catherine Winkworth. Then let us leave war, and bring needs to invite and include high-profile successful conservative Black leaders There may also be a moral dimenbrevity a little closer to home. It was a like Dr. Ben Carson and Senator Tim Scott of SC, plus a selection of conservasion to this tale, in that it was felt by two-word telephone message, which tive Black military leaders, Black CEOs, and Black sports heroes and coaches. many at the time, and by far more a friend took down for me in 1965,

With America watching, the president should serve only as moderator and a since, that the entire British conquest which changed my own life dramatlistener; his panel of conservative Black leaders would offer alternative ideas to of India was ruthless, reprehensible, ically. I had been waiting anxiousprotestors to meet their specific demands. The president needs to avoid telling and certainly sinful. And it is worth ly to hear whether my application the group how great he is, or what he has done for Black America. Let other noting that Catherine Winkworth herfor a teaching position on board a Black conservatives carry that message. self went on to have a distinguished cruise ship, converted into a “floating

Secondly, as a follow-up, I would encourage the president to invite former career as a translator of hymns. university,” had been accepted. The President Barack Obama to the White House for a televised friendly “fireside May I also remind you that it message, from the Director of the prochat” with the American people. Barack’s message would focus on promises he was another young woman, Annie gram, was: made to the American people during his terms in office: Ellsworth, who (in the same year, “ANCHORS AWEIGH!”

“We have made enormous progress in race relations over the course of the 1844) suggested to Samuel Morse the You may know that, since that expepast several decades. I’ve witnessed that in my own life. And to deny that progfirst words (quoting the Bible) which rience, my career has been primarily ress I think is to deny America’s capacity for change.” Morse sent publicly by telegraph: based on writing epigrams limited

“We should all be thankful for folks who are willing, in a peaceful, disci“WHAT HATH GOD WROUGHT.” to seventeen words. But seventeen is plined way, to be out there making a difference,” but in addition, “We need to I might further point out that Punch, a maximum – there is no minimum, condemn the criminals and thugs who tore up the city of Baltimore on Monday in its report, while crediting General and some of these expressions have night, after rioting and looting. When individuals get crowbars and start prying Napier, and not Miss Winkworth, also been as short as two words. One of open doors to loot, they’re not protesting. When they burn down a building, compared the General’s alleged telethem says, “Happy Everything!” – a they’re committing arson.” gram, in terms of concise reportage pleasant and useful enough message

Inclusion of your foes in delivering unified messaging plays to concepts of from a military leader, to its only – which has been very popular as a inclusion, caring and fairness. For Americans of both political persuasions, and notable predecessor – Julius Caesar’s postcard – but perhaps only a little most especially for independent voters, unity of message numbs the differences famous statement (which was also in more original than “Happy Birthday” between red and blue and encourages all voters to think more of the greater Latin, of course) after a Roman victory, or “Merry Christmas.” There is anothgood of the nation over party loyalty. Unified messaging also provides a more in what is now northern Turkey, in 47 er one, however, for which, although hopeful platform for meaningful economic and social change. BC: “Veni, vidi, vici.” This has much it has been part of my published series

That same message of inclusion and unity has been reiterated by presidents more pizzazz than the English transsince 1978, I cannot take complete throughout our history. Theodore Roosevelt said the one sure way to bring lation: “I came, I saw, I conquered.” credit. It was left by a friend, not as a down America would be to permit it to become a tangle of squabbling nationAnd it is validated by more than one “submission,” but simply as part of a alities, each insisting on their own identity.” George Washington said that “the Roman historian. note on my front door. I suppose I can bosom of America was open to all, but only if they were willing to be assimiWhile we’re in the foreign language claim credit for seeing this two-word lated to our customs, measures, and laws; in a word, soon become our people.” section, Ripley (“Believe It or Not”) message as a piece of literature which

Woodrow Wilson said flatly, “You cannot become Americans if you think of relates that a French artist named deserved whatever literary immortalyourselves in groups. America does not consist of groups. A man who thinks Charles Hue was once arrested in a ity it was in my power to bestow. It of himself as belonging to a particular national group has not yet become an place called Peku, and informed his simply says: American.” •MJ friends with a telegram reading: “HELLO FOREVER!” •MJ 25 June – 2 July 2020 • The Voice of the Village • MONTECITO JOURNAL 23