3 minute read
Editor’s Letter
from Not For Sale
CEO and Executive Editor of the Montecito Journal Media Group
Have We No Shame? T hus far COVID has shown much more resilience than we have. As a result, tempers are running high and pretty much everyone I know is at the emotional ragged edge. To keep a level head, I remind myself of one of my favorite sayings which has been variously attributed to everyone from Plato to Robin Williams. So if you like it, just say you heard it here: “Every person is fighting a massive battle you know nothing about. So be kind.”
My ability to live up to this credo was tested this past weekend. I took my daughter and her friend to brunch since our local restaurants have done such a wonderful job creating convivial outdoor dining. I dropped the girls off to get in line while I parked. When I joined my brood, I noticed that the woman in line behind us was standing just inches away – not just within six feet but also within our “personal space.” So, I turned to her and asked, “would you mind please backing up a few feet?”
The masked woman looked at me like I had a lot of nerve. “I’m not even sure these girls are in line,” she said. In fairness, my daughter and her friend were angled a foot or so to the side of the line so they could read the menu posted at the restaurant’s entrance. “In that case,” I said, “why don’t you go ahead of us and we’ll back up six feet.”
“No” the woman said, throwing down the gauntlet.
I was stunned. In all the weirdness of the past five months I’ve yet to personally encounter someone so brashly insensitive and gratuitously belligerent.
Admittedly, I’m not great in these moments because they bring out my deep-seeded umbrage at entitlement. So I’m sure by this point my attempt at civility was thinly veiled at best. I once again requested of my newfound adversary, “Please back up and give us some space.” It was what came next that shocked me the most.
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“We’re regular customers here,” she announced. “We know the owner.”
Okay, I know the owner too, but I was not aware that knowing the owner gave one the right to ignore the 6-foot distance requirement that was clearly marked on the ground. Or did this woman assume I was an out-of-towner and that gave her some special privilege to endanger us?”
Usually at this point when I’m standing up for something in public my kids are horrified and beg me (under their breath) to stop. But in this case even they were stunned as we began to feel like players in someone’s soon-to-be viral “Karen” video. Luckily the line moved and we were finally able to properly distance ourselves. But I’ve not stopped thinking about this exchange – turning it over in my mind, trying to understand her point, if she had one. Was she oppositional because she perceived that any concession to me would be a loss for her? Or was it just to pull rank on someone she assumed was not from here and therefore less worthy of what? Safety?
Maybe my brunch adversary was just having a bad day, engaged in a struggle I know nothing about. We’ve all been there. But I think we can agree that our personal travails don’t give us the right to behave recklessly. L aughing M atters EDITORIAL Page 304
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