Day in the life
When HVP met Pimlico
On one of the coldest days of December 2010, in the aftermath of snow, slush and slow trains, Sarah Allen made tracks towards Pimlico, London, to see how the team at Pimlico Plumbers do things ‘Twas just days before Christmas. The morning I ventured to Pimlico Plumbers’ headquarters was riddled with problems caused by the cold weather and snow. After traipsing to my local rail station first thing, on the advice of a certain travel service website, I was met with a group of wannabe-passengers and a noticeboard informing me that my train was in fact 40 minutes late, no doubt due to the much-publicised ‘adverse weather conditions’. Furthermore, once the train arrived, there was not even the promise of it taking us to our desired destination, instead going two stops where we were made to wait for another train to take us the distance. Even once on this train, it decided to stop at random moments indefinitely, perhaps to take in the white sights of London, while a voice apologised over the tannoy, announcing that it had “to wait for the train in front before we can be on our way. Once again, apologies for the inconvenience.” I couldn’t help but wonder, if the weather could cause this much chaos to public transport – as it had done for several days before this, what will the weather have done to London’s plumbing systems? Once all the faffing, slipping and map-tackling was out of the way, I soon found out. Pimlico Plumbers’ offices are not too far from HVP’s, so the journey had a bout of déjà vu about it. Nonetheless, the world of the plumbers was vaguely unfamiliar. The building comes complete with its own Eastenders’-style 24-hour ‘caff’ complete with menus and the day’s Sun newspaper for all staff members: plumbers and call
Plumber’s little helper: Pimlico Plumber Tony Kilbryde and HVP’s Sarah Allen
centre personnel. As I sat down to a bacon sarnie and a cup of tea, I observed two cooks working away preparing a table. “Is this where Jamie sits?” asked one holding a tin foilcovered plate. The head cook nodded while rustling up more plates of carbs and fat/energy. They do say the way to a man’s heart is his stomach. I’m fast learning this is also the way to a plumber’s working side. This continued for three more imaginary patrons. Then four plumbers poured in and, with a brief sniff in my direction, took their seats – as though staged – each unveiling their respective dishes. We could do with some of this service back at HVP! Once I’d enjoyed my first Pimlico tea of the day and was
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suited and booted, I was ready for my apprenticeship with Tony Kilbryde. As I’d missed Tony – who was out on a job when I arrived late courtesy of a certain local train service – Pimlico’s marketing manager Karl Plunkett suggested we take some snaps outside while I wait. The lovely Eric, the garage manager, quickly went into father-mode, urging me to put my jacket on before I go outside, even though I’d insisted I was warm. “And zip it up.” “I can tell you’re a dad”, I said, when he confirmed he was also a grandfather several times over. Once photos were done, Eric showed me around what I thought was a Pimlico shrine, which turned out to be the reception. The room was
adorned with framed autographed pictures from various celebrities and press clippings referencing either managing director Charlie Mullins or the company. Pretty overwhelming stuff. The celeb client wall of fame included the Absolutely Fabulous Joanna Lumley, Eastenders’ infamous aptlynicknamed ‘Dirty Den’ – played by Leslie Grantham – and Felicity Kendal, star of 70’s classic The Good Life. Once Tony arrived, we took a couple more shots before we were off. Tony told me this had been one of the busiest few weeks of the year, thanks to the wonderful weather. Let the games begin. PLUMBER’S LITTLE HELPER Our first job wasn’t as interesting as the client. Tony
Tony repairs a valve which had become blocked through limescale, causing a leak in one client’s house.
pulled up on a swanky, slushy London street in Knightsbridge, the likes of Harrods and Prada just minutes away. Tony was not as easily distracted. After knocking on the door to no avail, we retreated back to the van where Tony got in touch with someone from Pimlico’s call centre. They confirmed the client was on the way. Minutes later, a man approached us asking if we were here for such and such an address. Confirming everyone was now in the right place, the gentleman – we’ll call him Bob – escorted us to the house. Though not before having a quick word on his mobile phone. “Yes, sir, the plumber’s here now. “Is it alright if we come in, sir?” Bob led the way through the door where he removed and left his shoes, followed by Tony, who followed suit, and his helper, who also obliged. We were quickly met with a man about six foot tall wearing a
luxurious robe and John Lewis-style slippers. He barely nodded at us as he gave us a quick but firm once-over before we followed Bob around the four-storey house. The Robed Man retreated back into the living room, resurfacing once to ask of Tony after just seven minutes: “Is that it? Finished?” It turns out Bob was The Robe Man’s head bodyguard; the other two were out. Of course, Bob didn’t reveal very much about The Robed Man – especially after he eventually clocked I was a journalist. But there was certainly a lot of whispering, considering it was so early in the day. Bob’s boss had returned home the night before with his family to find that some of the taps were without running water. The four-bedroom, semidetached house consisted of at least three bathrooms, including an en-suite in the master bedroom. Not surprisingly, the higher the bathrooms got, the worse the problem.
The solution lay in much climbing of stairs (did I mention the house had four storeys?), a couple of trips to and from the attic and a top-up of the meter for the van courtesy of yours truly. Tony found the problem could be attributed to many things. The water cylinder was kept in the basement outside the house. The cylinder’s pump was struggling to circulate water throughout the large house. Ultimately, the problem was an air lock, and after two hours of The Plumber’s Workout Plan and much technical savvy from Tony, the job was done. Not quite the impossible seven minutes our wealthy friend was expecting. The expertise, effort and sweat was reflected in the bill, which came to more than £400. Clients are always made aware of the rates when they book appointments, so this came as no surprise to the Robed Man and his chief bodyguard. And by lunchtime – with no lunch – off we went to the next call. A ‘PLUMB’ LIFE Whatever ill-conceived stereotypes exist about plumbers today, Tony has nothing to do with them. Sadly, many uninformed members of the public would argue that plumbers are rude, obnoxious and perhaps even a tad sexist. However, Tony was none of these things. During our journeys in the van and on jobs, he effortlessly shot all of these stereotypes down. He was polite, friendly, patient and, above all, professional. A family man with two children under seven, Tony – 30 – will marry his “missus” of 10 years in a few months. He talks of how much he looks forward to spending Christmas with them, hinting at some stunning gifts he’s purchased. From the sounds of things, Tony is well overdue a break, but he would be the last person to admit this. He tells me of a time when, after working all day well into the evening, he returned home to find a relative
in need of assistance. He obliged and didn’t finish until after midnight. Tony has been in the trade for 13 years, after falling into a job accidentally when a friend offered him a job. Having trained and following several years of college, the next phase was experience, an asset which Tony swears by. He’s been with Pimlico Plumbers for six years. Some of his most recent clients include Oasis member Liam Gallagher and partner Nicole Appleton, as well as comedian and TV Burp host Harry Hill, who he said wore pretty much the same outfit as he does for his show, minus the comedy collar. The conversation eventually moved on to the criteria for employment required by Pimlico and that touchy subject: Money. I had recently attended a Christmas party where several people asked a social gathering’s most popular question of me: ‘What do you do?’ As soon as I mentioned plumbing, the inevitable requests masked in jest of me fixing a leaking pipe in someone’s house or a dodgy radiator upstairs ensued. But then a more serious complaint arose, around the topic of fees. I’m sad to reveal one company mentioned in the same sentence of disgruntlement was Pimlico Plumbers. “The guy hardly looked at the problem,” said one partypooper, “let alone fix it, but still charged me an arm and a leg for an hour’s work.” I raised the contentious issue of fees to Tony. His response shut me up. In the nicest possible way, of course. Pimlico Plumbers must have at least five years of experience, as well as all relevant qualifications and good references. This takes care of a substantial portion of the asking fee. Then there is the fact that someone is dispatched to a nearby job within an hour. The company’s efficient call centre keeps tabs on workers’ www.hvpmag.co.uk • 73
Day in the life
confirmed Pimlico’s website’s claim that “73% of weekly jobs are customers who have used Pimlico Plumbers before”. He knocked on the door and was met with a young lady and a chorus of children behind her, battling in an imaginary war. “Oh,” she seemed surprised. “There’s two of you.” Tony explained who I was
many basements?), which housed a leaking ceiling and then up to the twomachine laundry room directly above the leak, Tony retreated back to the cramped laundry room. He moved the machines – to the extent that they blocked the door shut – in order to get to the source of the leak. Filthy stuff. Tony barely noticed my squealing at the gunge hiding in the crevice which became his office for the next few minutes. The journey back and forth was made challenging with the three toddlers running around the house screaming at me: “Lady! LADY!” and asking Tony: “Are you the pumma?” They did everything they could to infiltrate the secret realm that was in fact the laundry room once Tony had shut himself in, convinced there were things far more interesting
and asked if I was okay to shadow him. She agreed. I don’t think she cared either way, she clearly just wanted to have the plumbing problem sorted. Heather complained of a washing machine going out of business. After a journey to the deep, dark basement underground (who knew London had so
within at the prospect of restricted access. Tony removed the valve from the ailing machine revealing a build-up of limescale, which had blocked the hose. After replacing the valve and hose with a fresh set from his van, he warned Heather this would be a temporary fix, as the equipment he needed long-
The Pimlico Plumbers’ wall of fame is full of celebrity clients
locations, calculating how much time they are likely to have between jobs to determine how to assign them. Plumbers must also be checked for criminal records (CRB check). Tony explained that it would be unwise for the company to take on someone with a penchant for burglary, for example. So clients are safe in the knowledge that the people they let into their homes or offices are more than capable of solving their problems safely and legally. Although plumbers are paid on an hourly rate, there is nothing rushed about a job. Quality is valued by the team, keen to avoid callbacks as a result of shoddy work. Any complaints or excessive callbacks are investigated and dealt with accordingly, to maintain Pimlico Plumbers’ reputation. These men and women are well aware of what their clients are paying and know they must do their utmost to justify such fees. FROM SECRET SOCIETY TO QUIET SUBURBIA My last job of the day was spent in a house just outside Hammersmith. Tony informed me Heather (again, not her real name) was a repeat customer who’s luck had finally run out. This
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term had to be ordered, resulting in another visit in the near future. Heather seemed happy with this verdict. Now this problem was solved, her next mission was to get the kids out of the house. Apparently, they were all mad on swimming. DEAR DIARY... My day in the life of a plumber was enlightening on many levels. Not only did it highlight the depth of expertise and qualifications necessary for the role, but also the pace and variety of the day intrigued me. I never knew what we would be met with from one house to the next; from a gentleman of leisure with bodyguards to a sweet mother of three cute kids. Plus the operation of the company is something to behold. “Since I left my last job, I’ve never looked back,” said Tony. And you can tell it’s the truth. He seems genuinely happy to work for Pimlico. And impressed. “They’ve got everything covered!” This includes vehicle maintenance, vans complete with sinks and on-site facilities including showers in case you’ve been
Clients include Thandie Newton, Joanna Lumley and Harry Hill
on a particularly grubby job. It’s true, Mullins has built himself an enviable empire, but it would not exist without the skill, hard work and dedication of people like Tony. And me, just for the day at least.