Big Mike & friends

Photo by Rikke Photography

bIG MIke aNd frIeNds

big Mike Phillips

—Big Mike Phillips is an activist, fundraiser, bartender and photographer who has lived in San Diego for 30 years. He has helped create two nonprofits and raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for charity. He has been a photographer for more than 25 years and has recorded our LGBTQ history not only in San Diego but around the country, including three LGBTQ marches on Washington D.C. Contact Big Mike at 619-807-7324, or bmsd1957@gmail.com.

As of this edition, I will be changing the format of my column ‘Big Mike and Friends’ to a Q&A format while still introducing you to people who live, work, play and do business in our community and city. Learning about people of every lifestyle, talents, and personalities who I think are interesting and easy for our readers to enjoy. San Diego has a wonderful diversity of individuals who make our slice of paradise a great place to live and enjoy each other’s uniqueness.

This week’s Q&A is with Cathrine Oclassen

How did you end up in San Diego and what do you love about it?

“I moved to San Diego for the beautiful weather, the opportunity to expand my business and for the more relaxed atmosphere. There’s just something special about San Diego that I just cannot put my finger on, yet I love it here!”

What gets you excited about life?

“My true passion is educating people and the community on how to live a more abundant life through holistic and alternative ways of living. Teaching people to take charge of their well-being and empowering them to take action.”

As a businessowner, what makes your business stand out?

“In my business, we have successfully married the beverage industry with the service industry creating the world’s most unique urban tea lounge and detox [‘My Detox Lounge’]. We truly are a millennial’s dream lounge.”

What small act of kindness were you once shown that you’ll never forget?

“Growing up poor, a family once brought me and my siblings into their house to share their dinner with us, but the kindness really came from the fact that they themselves were poor, only having beans and tortillas to feed us all.”

If the universe could grant you one wish, what would you wish for?

“I wish that one day everyone would wake up knowing how truly special they are and that they are exactly enough and worthy of love and respect. My golden rule: “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”

If you wrote a book about your life, what would you title it and why?

“The title of my book would be: ‘What Not To Do.’ I would like to consider myself an expert in the field of business and wellness, however I got there from learning what the HECK not to do...trial and error makes for the best teachers.”

CaTHrINe OClasseN

my detOx lOunge

(courtesy images)

to the beach and reinvest the rest of the money.”

If you could give someone advice about your art, hobby or business, what would you tell them?

“I would tell them to find their true passion in life, whether it’s a hobby, job or sport and then turn that into your career. Only work your passion!”

If you were granted one superpower for life, what would you choose and why?

“Well, hell, we are all already super! [laughs] My superpower would be to access 100% of my brain’s capabilities, making me limitless.”

If you had the opportunity to join someone you love, admire, or wanted to meet over a cup of coffee, what coffee or tea house would you go to and what question would you ask them?

“Honestly, I don’t know this one. Hmm? The boring answer is I would meet them at the world’s most unique tea lounge, My Detox Lounge, and I would ask them what their favorite cup of tea is and what it reminds them of.”

Contact: CATHRINE OCLASSEN 619-539-7707 instagram.com/mydetoxlounge/

NEW BiZ

On the BlOCk

COVID-19 is not stopping new businesses from opening up in our neighborhood!

cocina calavera

3923 Fourth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103 619-241-2422 Re-inventing familiar Latin foods with a health-driven twist, free from gluten/dairy/sugar. Now open in Fabulous Hillcrest!

cocinacalavera.com

coco’s Poke

3739 Sixth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103 619-326-8676 New poke shop located in Hillcrest. They incorporate the traditional Hawaiian poke dish with a Latin twist to create the best of both worlds.

cocospoke.com

Parlor on Fifth

3144 Fifth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103 619-230-5988 This shop has operated for the last 20 years under different names and in many different conditions. However, today they exist to pay homage to a decades-old neighborhood shop while having the opportunity to revamp and exist in the modern market of barbering.

parloronfifthbarbershop.com

664 TJ Birrieria

564 University Ave., San Diego, CA 92103 619-292-2498 National City’s eatery continues expanding in San Diego and has now opened a location in Hillcrest in the space that housed Capricho restaurant. The shop specializes in birria and shredded beef stew offered in tacos, quesadillas or meat piled atop of tostadas and served with a side of consome birria broth for dipping. The menu also includes an array of Mexican mariscos seafood.

record Family Wines Tasting room

1035 University Ave., San Diego, CA 92103 619-759-0153 Family-owned, premium wine brand from Paso Robles has opened a tasting room in Hillcrest for all the wine lovers. Currently the tasting room is open by appointment and limited retail hours.

recordfamilywines.com

POzITIvelY MICHael

Michael Guadarrama

— I am a 30-year-old Latino male, living with HIV (undetectable) and living my best life. I wanted to write and help others living with HIV realize that they can also achieve living a healthy life, being in love, and being successful.

Hello my fellow San Diegans. My name is Michael and I am super excited to be able to share part of my life with you. I am a 30-year-old Latino male, living with HIV (undetectable) and living my best life.

I wanted to write and help others living with HIV realize that they can also achieve living a healthy life, being in love, and being successful. The journey I have gone through to be where I am today was not an easy road and I had many times where I wanted to give up but something inside of me pushed me to live my best life. If I am able to help at least one person through my experiences than that would be the best gift from all of this. Let’s discuss subjects ranging from acceptance of having HIV, rejection for having HIV, dating, different medications, and the wonderful programs available.

In 2011, when I was 21 years old, my “numbers” were bad enough to where I was diagnosed (by my doctors at the time) with AIDS; I later learned that most patients have severe numbers like I did if they’ve recently been infected and/or have not had the proper care, thus receiving the diagnosis of AIDS as opposed to HIV-positive due to my T-cells being very low. After just two months of being on antiviral medications, I was able to become HIV-positive undetectable and have remained so since.

Science, medicine and AIDS/HIV services have come a long way even since my diagnosis, and I feel great knowing that there are so many tools that we have to help those recently diagnosed and those living with the virus for a long period.

Being Latino and Gay is still very taboo in our culture today and not very well accepted. Over the years, it seems that it has gotten better but it’s still something that is kept very hush-hush. As much as it makes me happy that acceptance for being Gay is being normalized within our community, I can’t help but notice the STIGMA that still exists with HIV. We have to do our part to educate our fellow Latinos and share the wonderful advances we have been able to accomplish with prevention and also longterm care and living a healthy life being HIV-positive. Know that you are not alone in this situation and no matter how hard it might be to have an open dialogue about the subject, it will always be OK and this is YOUR truth.

Love is real and we cannot help who we fall in love with, sometimes we fall in love with someone who is HIV-positive and other times, we fall in love with someone who is not. We should not go through life feeling like we do not deserve to be loved or that we will never find someone who accepts us as a whole. For many years, I felt that I was not worthy of being loved and I was scared to get someone else sick and afraid of being rejected. I cannot begin to explain how many times I was blocked, laughed at, judged, talked down to, told I was not dateable, and even outed to others about my status. I looked for love and acceptance in all the wrong places starting with dating apps, dating websites and even dating events. As the years went by, I felt more alone and I was already ready to be rejected just like the other 100 times when on a date. Feeling depressed and alone can be the “norm” but I learned that it all started with me and my self-esteem and also truly accepting that I was HIV-positive and worthy of being in love and loved. It takes time but when you get to the right place, it’s funny how the universe always knows how to provide exactly what we need and can handle at that point in our lives. YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED.

Many people wonder if they will be able to work a normal job and be OK. Some people doubt that they will be able to find a good job that will not judge them for their status. Working in the HR field, I have had many potential employees disclose their status. I am here to tell you that it is not REQUIRED for you to disclose to your employer, potential employer, bosses or co-workers about it. This should not be important or a deciding factor for you to be an employee of any company. It is very important that we know the laws that protect us and also, that we do not provide any information that can later be used against us. The workplace should be a neutral place, and where you can be comfortable to see your duties through. You should not be living in fear of retaliation over a medical condition.

It’s also very important to find a support group, circle of friends or family that will listen, encourage, support and push you to be the best version of you possible. When they say, “It takes a village,” it truly does take a village to back you up and support you as you go through the motions of getting your test results, to your appointments and also regularly ask you, “How are you doing?” “How are you doing with your meds?” It is very important to have those you can talk to and can trust to guide you in the right direction. Know that there are other people out there that care, love you, and are willing to support you in every way possible. You are not alone in the world. Remember you are strong, beautiful, smart and you can get through anything.

I look forward to starting this new journey and going into subjects thoroughly. There is so much we can learn from each other and I am excited and optimistic that we will be able to let someone know that they are not alone and that we all share similar struggles and stories. Always remember that you are loved and you are worthy of being loved.

Until we meet again, Michael

We All deserve lOve