Seacoast Scene 01-09-20

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THE CZAR’S FRIENDS OF BREWERY CENTENNIAL P. 16 HALL P. 13 JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020

Why you should head outside and make the most of the season

INSIDE: HAMPTON AUTHOR TALKS NEW BOOK


A WORD FROM LARRY

Master McGrath’s

Awards all around Announcing the great community businesses that are this years Hampton Area Chamber annual award winners. The 2020 Award Winners are: Business of the year Award: Breakfast Hill Larry Marsolais Golf Club Faith in the Future Award: Wicked Flannel The President Award: Bill Manzi, Seabrook NH Town Manager New for 2020 is the People’s Choice Award, given in memory of two wonderful Hampton Area Chamber members. Julie Leonard and Lenny Joubert both worked hard to improve the welfare and happi-

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ness of others. To continue their spirit for the future, the chamber would like to recognize and honor another humanitarian in the Hampton Area Community with this new award: Uta Pineo. These awards will be presented at the awards dinner on Jan. 23 at Seabrook Park in Seabrook. For more information contact the Hampton Chamber. The Scene wishes to congratulate all of the winners. As always feel free to call me anytime at 603-935-5096 to discuss local issues or to place an ad. Larry Marsolais is the general manager of the Seacoast Scene and the former president of the Hampton Rotary Club.

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Advertising Staff Larry Marsolais Seacoast Scene General Manager 603-935-5096 larry@seacoastscene.net

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COVER STORY 6 Winter warrior

MAPPED OUT 12 Beaches, restrooms, where to walk your dog and more

PEOPLE & PLACES 13 The coolest Seacoast dwellers and scenes

FOOD 16 Eateries and foodie events

POP CULTURE 20 Books, art, theater and classical

NITE LIFE 25 Music, comedy and more

BEACH BUM FUN 26 Puzzles, horoscopes and crazy news

Have an event or a story idea for the Seacoast Scene? Let us know at: editor@seacoastscene.net

Your weekly guide to the coast. Published every Thursday (1st copy free; 2nd $1).

Unsolicited submissions are not accepted and will not be returned or acknowledged. Unsolicited submissions will be destroyed.

Seacoast Scene PO Box 961 Hampton NH 03843 603-935-5096 | www.seacoastscene.net


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EVENTS TO CHECK OUT JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020, AND BEYOND Learn to meditate

The Salisbury Public Library will host a meditation session on Thursday, Jan. 23, from 6:30 to 8 p.m. Join Eileen Carlotto, long time meditator, for a workshop to learn simple techniques to bring joy, peace and relaxation into your daily life. Visit salisburylibrary.org for more on this and other events happening at the library.

Celebrate MLK Day

The Children’s Museum of New Hampshire will be open Monday, Jan. 20, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. to celebrate Martin Luther King Junior Day by sharing activities that emphasize peace. Make a peace dove, create your own peace sign, and listen to readings throughout the day. This program is free with museum admission. Visit childrensmuseum.org.

All about Egypt

Criminal satire

The Seacoast Repertory Theatre Teen Mainstage presents Chicago Jan. 9 through Jan. 18, with showtimes on Thursday at 7:30 p.m., Friday at 8 p.m., Saturday at 2 and 8 p.m., and Sunday at 2 and 7:30 p.m. The production is based on the 1926 play by Maurine Dallas Watkins and the script adaptation by David Thompson, with music by John Kander and lyrics by Fred Ebb. It’s a satire inspired by two unrelated court cases Watkins covered for the Chicago Tribune in 1924 that involved two women who were tried and acquitted for murder. Tickets cost $15 to $25. Visit seacoastrep.org

The Hampton Falls Free Library hosts a cultural enrichment program on the country of Egypt on Thursday, Jan. 9, at 6:30 p.m. Hampton Falls resident Scott Faiia spent three years living and working in Cairo, Egypt. Now retired, he has offered to share his experiences in Egypt through photographs and a presentation. The program is designed for anyone interested in expanding their horizons and learning about a different part of the world from the perspective of an individual who has bridged cultures. The program is free and open to the public. Visit hamptonfallslibrary. org or call 926-3682.

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By Rob Levey

Just because it’s winter doesn’t mean you need to stay cooped up for the next few months. Here’s how to enjoy the outdoors in and around the Seacoast and beyond, all season long.

Run for it

You do not have to restrict your running to a treadmill this time of year, says Eric Martinson, store manager of Runner’s Alley in Portsmouth. In fact, the Winter Warrior Challenge was designed to get people outside even on the coldest or snowiest of days. Presented by Brooks and organized by Runner’s Alley, the Winter Warrior Challenge takes place in January, and participants must run or walk at least one mile

outside each day, tracking their mileage at winterwarriornh.com. “As participants log miles using our online platform, they can see how they stack up against the rest of the country,” Martinson said. “All the mileage is inputted remotely by the participant and can be completed anywhere outdoors.” In addition to the Winter Warrior Challenge, Runner’s Alley offers group runs from the store on Thursday evenings at 6 p.m. and Saturday mornings at 8 a.m. For folks who have never run in the winter before, Martinson has several bits of advice. “Stay hydrated and dress appropriately,” he said. “In general, you should dress for 15 degrees warmer than the actual temper-

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ature. This will prevent you from feeling overheated or overdressed.” He said a hat, gloves, and warm socks are of the utmost importance. “Most of your body’s energy will be spent keeping your core warm rather than your extremities,” he said. Runner’s Alley founder Jeanine Sylvester agreed and added, “Consider wearing a wool sock such as Darn Tough Vermont to keep your feet warm and dry.” She said winter is also a good time to wear a sock that comes above the ankle versus just above the shoe to ensure there are no gaps between your shoe and tights or pants. “A wicking hat and gloves or mittens

can also keep you toasty warm on the coldest of days,” she said. In regard to your entire outfit, Martinson said they advocate for a layering system. “A good base layer wicks sweat away from your skin, keeping you dry and warm,” he said. “A heavier mid layer traps heat and continues wicking sweat away from the base layer, while a water/windresistant shell layer protects you from the elements so that your sweat doesn’t chill.” Depending on the day and “the wacky weather of New England,” he said, you may need only one or all three layers. “As for shoes, most folks should opt for either a waterproof road shoe or a trail shoe with a more substantial tread pattern and tougher but not necessarily waterproof


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Strap on some skis

While the Seacoast is clearly not a mecca for the downhill variety of skiing, Bob Siener, owner of Fire on the Mountain and Burning Boards in Dover, cited one “great local ski hill” in South Berwick, Maine.

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Tricia and Susannah brave the cold. Photo courtesy of Runner’s Alley.

upper,” he said. “Strap-on traction devices such as Kahtoola Nanospikes are incredibly beneficial for navigating icy, snow-packed streets, too.” In addition to spikes that attach to your shoes, Martinson said, you should shorten your stride and increase your cadence, which will help keep you steady and balanced. He also cited staying visible as another important factor when it comes to running in the winter. “It’s incredibly important that if you are running in the morning or early evening that you are visible,” he noted. “Reflective vests and clip-on lights, or reflectors, are essential for the rapid changes in light that we experience during the winter.” Depending on the snow pack, Martinson said, you will need either snowshoes or a strap-on traction device, such as Kahtoola Microspikes, to navigate trails. “Given the remote nature of trail running, it’s also important to take extra precautions in winter and pack an extra layer, plenty of water and a phone for emergencies,” he added. For Martinson, running outside through the winter — either on or off road — simply offers “the perfect opportunity to experience ‘a runner’s high.’” “Completing a run or walk in less than ideal conditions is indeed something to be proud of,” he said. “The feeling of accomplishment that comes with it also often provides a solid emotional boost on an otherwise gray, blustery day.”

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“It’s called Powderhouse Hill, and it has a rope tow and costs only $5,” he said. “It’s great for kids.” There are, however, several options for cross-country skiing, all of which are equally suitable for hiking, including Kingman Farm (Durham/Madbury), Applecrest Farms (Hampton Falls) and Urban Forestry Center (Portsmouth). “I also go to a place like Mount Agamenticus (South Berwick) to get in a hike or something,” said Siener. “If the snow is good, I will go cross-country skiing.” Cross-country skiing is also a favorite activity for Peter Sawtell of Seven Rivers Paddling. “My absolute favorite is once the snow starts to fly, he said. “As a child, my mother would often get the same feeling. My mother, brother, sister and I would all get out our snow clothes, wax up our cross-country skis and head outdoors. I remember skiing for hours.” Now 36 and married with four kids (ages 11, 9, 6 and 4), Sawtell has continued the tradition. He said cross-country skiing began to really click with his kids in their second year. “Now, they are the first to wake up and ask to ski that first fresh blanket of snow,” he said. New technology has changed some aspects of it since he was a kid, though. “We don’t wax our skis, because fish scales have made the cross-country ski sport even easier to fall in love with,” he said. For those unfamiliar with the term ‘fish scales,’ Sawtell said they are on the bottom of the ski and comprise a section under your foot with little half-moon bumps. “These bumps are at about a 1-degree angle that taper to 0 degrees moving to the tip of the ski,” he said. “They are 8

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designed to grip the snow when going uphill and provide minimal resistance while going downhill.” In addition to Kingman Farm, he cited Powder Major’s Forest and area rail trails as family favorite destinations for crosscountry skiing. As for gear, Sawtell suggested investing in a good pair of boots, gloves or mitts. His favorite piece of gear is a neck warmer or buff. “Don’t forget about some thermal base layers, as they are key to keeping warm,” he said. For folks unsure about purchasing a ski boot for their kids (whose feet are growing), Siener said they offer a Boot Club in which ski boots can be leased as opposed to purchased. “It lets you lease a used ski boot or snowboard boot for $25 annually,” he said. “It’s all about making the sport affordable.” For Siener, affordability is what makes cross-country skiing a particularly attractive sport. “Cross-country skiing is easier to get into, as the fees at cross-country skiing centers are much less than a ski resort will charge,” he said. “The cost of the gear can be less as well.” To learn more about the Boot Club, visit fireonthemountain-burningboards.com.

Angling on ice

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New Hampshire’s only full-time yearround fishing guide service, Tim Moore Outdoors is your best bet if you want to experience ice fishing on a guided tour. “Ice fishing is different for many anglers,” said Tim Moore Outdoors’ Tim Moore, whose business is located in Barrington. “The basics are drilling holes in the ice, using an ice auger, and using

rods designed for ice fishing or tip-ups to catch fish.” Regarding equipment for ice fishing, he said jig rods are basically miniature full-length open water rods designed for ice fishing. “You can attach a lure or bait to the rod,” he said. A tip-up is an ice fishing device with a free-moving spool, a trigger, and a flag. “Anglers attach bait to the end of the line and lower it to their desired depth,” he explained. “The flag is set on the trigger. Once a fish takes the bait, the spool moves, setting the flag off and alerting the angler that there is a fish on it.” According to Moore, one of the best parts of ice fishing is its social aspect. “It is filled with tradition for many,” he said. “Some anglers are primarily concerned with catching fish, while others are more concerned with the social aspect and catching fish is secondary.” Comfort is another goal for most anglers. “I’ve found that most clients want to be comfortable, warm and dry and want to have pleasant conversation,” he said. “Some want to bring food and cooking equipment, others want to bring photography equipment, and others just want to spend the time between fish catches chatting.” Moore learned to ice fish for smelt on Great Bay — which has access points in several Seacoast-area towns, including Greenland, Newmarket and Newington — with his dad. He said his favorite thing about ice fishing is the quiet. “It can be a very contemplative experience,” he said. “I love to catch fish, though, and ice fishing affords me the opportunity to move around, even on days when the conditions, the wind, wouldn’t allow it in a boat.”


Tim Sheppard maintains a trail. Courtesy photo.

Technology, he said, enhances the ice fishing experience. “I’ve learned to make ice fishing as easy as possible through advances in clothing technology and various techniques specifically designed to make ice fishing easier,” he said. For those who want a guide and don’t mind traveling, Moore takes anglers to the northern part of Lake Winnipesaukee. Trips, he noted, are six hours long, generally lasting from 7 a.m. to 1 p.m. “We meet our clients at a predetermined location, which is usually based on ice and fishing conditions, and transport them out to the fishing location on a snowmobile,” he explained. “We use portable shelters with heaters for the colder days.” He said their clients need only bring their food, fishing license and appropriate clothing. “We supply everything else,” he said. Moore said their goal is to catch lake trout and white perch. “We set up in an area we believe to be productive and hope that the fish got the memo,” he laughed. “We will move our clients as often as the weather and group size permits. … On the slowest days, we see a half dozen fish caught, while more productive days we see fish counts in double digits. Anglers can typically expect to catch a dozen or more fish on average.” Moore said all anglers 16 or older are required to purchase a New Hampshire

freshwater fishing license. “Many of our clients opt to purchase the one-day license,” he said. “In New Hampshire, anglers are allowed to keep a picture of their fishing license on their smartphone.”

Ride on

If you’ve ridden a snowmobile through trails in Exeter or Epping, there is a good chance you were on trails groomed by Tim Sheppard or another member of Exeter Snow Hounds Snowmobile Club. “We have about 14 miles of smaller trails throughout Exeter and Epping,” said Sheppard, who is president of the club, one of the original groups to start New Hampshire Snowmobile Association. “Each year we must get permission from private landowners, New Hampshire Fish and Game, and SELT [Southeast Land Trust] lands.” Noting he and members head out on foot in the fall to maintain and clear these trails, he said the system connects eastern Exeter to Epping and crosses the Rockingham Recreational Trail toward Newmarket. “Some trails one would probably not be able to access in the summer months,” said Sheppard, who noted they groom the trails a few times a week to keep them flat and smooth. “Once the ground freezes, though, it gives us access to these places.” As an example, he said Diamond Hill in Epping has been closed to traffic for decades. “Thanks to landowners, though, getting to the top is easy via a snowmobile,” 10

Where to be a winter warrior Whether you hike, run, cross-country ski, bike or snowshoe, the following is a list of just some of the places you can go and be a winter warrior. • Applecrest Farms (Hampton Falls) • Dover Community Trail (Dover) • Fort Rock (Henderson-Swasey Town For-

est and Oaklands Town Forest in Exeter) • Kingman Farm (Madbury/Durham) • Odiorne Point State (Rye) • Powder Major’s Forest (Madbury) • Rockingham Recreational Trail (Newfields and other locations) • Stratham Hill Park (Stratham) • Urban Forestry Center (Portsmouth)

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stress this enough — we are all volunteers.” For someone looking to get into snowmobiling in southern New Hampshire, Sheppard suggested a fan-cooled machine with a smaller engine. “You can get into a nice little used sled for around $2,000 to get started,” he said. To learn more about trail conditions or Exeter Snow Hounds, visit facebook.com/ ExeterSnowHounds.

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he said. “Rockingham County does have some of the most scenic trails in the state if we get the snow coverage. Our county clubs work together on many projects.” Noting “many hands make light work,” Sheppard said the club’s greatest need is volunteers. “New ‘hands on’ members are few and far between,” he said “At 45, I’m one of the youngest people in our county. I can’t

Offering six miles of groomed trails, Stratham Hill Park in Stratham is a popular winter destination for hikers in the winter, and there’s a pond for skating and hockey, too. “Most of the fields and a few of the wooded loops are groomed,” said Seth Hickey, Parks and Recreation director for the Town of Stratham. The only caveat with the trails is the amount of snow coverage. “There needs to be at least four inches of snow on the ground to enable our groomer to access the trails,” he said. For the latest information on the trails, Hickey said they post what is groomed on their Department’s Facebook page to make the public aware of what has been completed. “We ask that park users refrain from walking on the groomed sections in their boots,” he said. “We also ask people to try to avoid ‘post holing’ in maintained areas.” In addition to numerous hiking opportunities, fat bikes may be rented here, too. “They cost $20 per bike for a three-hour

session,” said Hickey. “Reservations are required with a 48-hour notice.” Before heading out to rent a bike, be sure to check the weather. “Bikes are only rented if the temperatures are below 30 degrees and the ground is frozen,” said Hickey, who noted riders must also provide their own helmets. There are four adult bikes and two youth bikes available to rent at Stratham Hill Park. “Fat biking is fun and an easy way to get out and enjoy winter at the Park,” he said. “When there is enough snow, all of the roots and rocks disappear, and it is smooth sailing out on the trails.” For those who enjoy either ice skating or pond hockey, Stratham Hill Park also features two areas for both of these winter activities. “Both skating areas have lights for nighttime usage,” said Seth Hickey, Parks and Recreation director for the Town of Stratham. “We filled both areas with water by the middle of December and then waited for steady cold temps. It takes several days at 20 degrees or lower for the ice to freeze.”


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MARCY MILNE MCCANN Marcy Milne McCann is the president of the board of directors of the Friends of Centennial Hall in North Hampton.

designated for Phase 1 of our revitalization and matched in three months with contributions from residents, businesses and foundations. Projects in Phase 1 have a completion target in early spring of 2020, well ahead of LCHIP specifications for grants to be awarded in full.

What is Friends of Centennial Hall? FOCH is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization whose mission is to preserve, renovate and maintain historic Centennial Hall for joint Photo by Matt Parker I understand you worked Photography. use by both private citizens and with other folks. Who else the public. To meet the challenges of our most helped make this happen? ambitious revitalization effort to date I also FOCH … has benefited greatly with the assumed the position of executive director. As support and assistance provided by North such, I manage the building, the tenants and the Hampton’s Heritage Commission, Historical nonprofit organization. Society, town departments, neighbors and business community. ... For example, the Tell us a little about its history. law firm Donahue, Tucker & Ciandella have In 1997, a group of citizens, many of provided legal support for many, many years them alumni of Centre School, joined with immeasurable value. There are two key forces to preserve the Hall. … Since FOCH players with expert skills, dedication, and assumed stewardship of Centennial Hall … work ethic center to the current revitalization there have been 11 separate improvement project’s success. General Contractor and initiatives, all focused on enhancing the Project Manager Peter Goodrich and historic building’s appearance and functionality. ... preservationist and restoration specialist Steve Each of these projects has been successfully Bedard. It’s accurate to say that we would not funded and completed, overseen by an be at this exciting stage in delivering a fully all-volunteer board with no paid staff. accessible and restored building without their steadfast and dogged determination to get things Any recent projects? done and done to the highest standards at the After conducting a complete building best possible price and with the best attitude. assessment funded in part by the New Hampshire Preservation Alliance, FOCH Are you from the area? If not, where from recently launched the most ambitious effort and what drew you here? in our history, a revitalization proceeding I grew up in southern Connecticut, moved along two tracks: rehabilitation and access around and across the states before spending improvement. The approach to rehabilitation a significant part of my life in the Bay Area. I and access improvement is designed in three have been fortunate to have traveled extensively phases to provide the best possible results at the domestically and internationally and always most reasonable cost and will keep the building found myself drawn to the New England open for active use throughout construction. coastline. When you live without the ‘seasons,’ the holidays feel disingenuous and hollow to Can you provide us with some details? some extent. Living on this beautiful coastline The priority need at the center of this project is with access to the mountains and airports within to ‘Open the Ballroom’ and restore access to the a reasonable drive — is there any other place grand second floor and its 225-person capacity. better to live and raise a family? I don’t think so. This will greatly expand current performing arts programming and provide the community What is your favorite part about North at large with what is desperately needed — Hampton? private/public assembly and function space Community. We have a tremendously for a myriad of activities. A fully functioning loyal support base in town, as we do with large event space will bring the benefits of the our neighbors, all town departments and creative economy to North Hampton, drawing commissions and the North Hampton Business even more arts and culture consumers. Our Association Community. The only way we Open the Ballroom Campaign received a have been so successful with our initiatives is Land and Community Heritage Investment because of the people here in town. The support Program [LCHIP] challenge grant of $200,000 and philanthropy of North Hampton residents is last winter, one of the largest historic resource and has been so rewarding professionally and grants given. This was the largest grant award personally and has kept me enthusiastic about for a historic resource on the Seacoast, in the potential for the Hall for many years. a very competitive year. These funds were — Rob Levey

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 13


CAR TALK

Try these cars on for size

By Ray Magliozzi

Dear Car Talk: My ‘06 Scion xA has 87,000 miles on it, and I’m thinking of updating. I love my Scion because I sit up higher than in a sedan (I’m 79 so I’m getting shorter), and I can see who’s out to get me on

the road. Any hatchback out there these days that’s not an SUV but will let me see better? Thanks for your help. — Lynne Plenty of them, Lynne. You’re in luck. Over the past decade, the rest of the car buying public has caught up with you. A lot of people now prefer to sit up a little higher when they drive. Why? Well, as you say, it’s easier to see over the car in front of you. That advantage will diminish as more sedans are replaced by tall hatchbacks and crossovers. But hopefully you’ll have a few good years of visibility before you get overtaken. The second reason people prefer to be a little higher is because it’s easier to get in and out of the car. We’re not talking about the huge SUVs, where you have to get a running start to clamber up into the driver’s seat. But cars that are a little higher off the ground put the seat bottom closer to human hip level. That means you don’t have to “fall” into the car, or “climb” out of it.

So, you have a lot of choices these days. You’ll have to go out and sit in some new cars, and decide which fit you well, and which you’re comfortable driving. But we’ll give you a few suggestions to get you started. We’re going to assume that you want a basic hatchback, like the Scion. Nothing fancy. And while we don’t know the exact seat height of your current Scion, we know the car’s overall height is 60.2 inches — unless, like you, Lynne, the Scion’s getting shorter as it gets older. Here are a few cars with similar heights that we like: The Hyundai Kona is 61 inches tall, about an inch taller than your Scion. We drove it recently and really liked it. Kia makes an unusual car called the Soul, which is a bit boxier than your Scion, and a couple of inches taller. But it has very good visibility and a lot of room inside. If you ever drive in the snow, and want allwheel drive, we like the Subaru Crosstrek, which is 63.6 inches tall. That’s a few inches taller than your Scion, so you’ll have to make sure it’s easy to get into and out of, but it’s very comfortable for a small car. And if you want to impress all the kids, you can go electric with the Chevy Bolt, a batterypowered hatchback that’s 62.8 inches tall. You’d plug it in at night, and you can go 250 miles before having to recharge it. And you’ll

never have to set foot in a gas station again, Lynne. Unless you need some Gatorade and a bag of Bugles. There are others, but that should give you a good start. Let us know what you end up with. Dear Car Talk: I am the original owner of my 2015 Mazda 3 with just under 28,000 miles. During my recent routine service appointment, the following actions were recommended: replace all four tires ($460, not counting labor), throttle body service ($65) and fuel injector service ($130). I’ve had 10- to 14-year-old cars and never had one needing the last two services mentioned above. What do you think is going on? — Linda Well, it sounds like your dealer has a small boat with a payment due. If he had a 38-foot cabin cruiser, he’d be recommending shocks and an exhaust system, too, Linda. Let’s start with the good news. Your dealer’s prices are not out of line. What he’s proposing to charge you for each of those services is pretty reasonable, assuming he’s selling good quality tires. The bad news is that you may not need any of those things. We have a machine in the shop that does the throttle body and fuel injector cleaning. It’s

called the Motor Vac, but we call it the Wallet Vac. We used to use it a couple of times a week. It would make a big difference for cars that were stumbling and hesitating. But gasolines are so clean these days that I’m not sure I can remember the last time we used the machine. So, those services shouldn’t be needed unless your car is showing symptoms of dirty fuel injectors. The primary symptoms are hesitation on acceleration, or a check engine light that’s on and storing a code for a fuel system problem. Otherwise, the cleaning is completely unnecessary. You may need tires. Original equipment tires on modestly priced cars are often not great quality and do wear out by 30,000 miles. You might ask around (or check mechanicsfiles.com) for a recommendation of a good, independent mechanic in your area, and get a second opinion on all three of these services. If a second shop confirms that you need these things, then you’ll know your dealer is on the up and up, and you can go back to him with confidence. If the shop says you can get another 10,000 miles out of these tires, and they have no idea why the dealer is recommending a fuel injector cleaning, you can factor that into your future car repair plans, too. Visit Cartalk.com.

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 14



FOOD

AT THE CZAR’S BREWERY The site of a former bank in downtown Exeter is now the home of The Czar’s Brewery (2 Center St., Exeter, theczarsbrewery@comcast.net, find them on Facebook), the newest brewpub on the Seacoast. Owner Henry Vance even renovated the old basement vault into a full-service kitchen, serving a menu of house-made appetizers, soups and salads, as well as fresh sandwiches with authentic Italian cold cuts, gourmet macaroni and cheese dishes and its signature “Megadog” hot dogs. The brewpub currently features six beers on tap, including a brown ale, a blonde ale, a New England IPA and a raspberry wheat ale, but Vance said he’s also looking to introduce a Russian imperial stout and a barleywine in the near future. A homebrewer for more than two decades, Vance also worked in merchandising and sales for Associated Grocers of New England for several years. The name “Czar’s,” he said, is derived from a canoe trip he’d take with his friends to Lake Aziscohos in Maine every September — the group would make it a tradition to arrive with a homebrewed beer and a funny hat. After arriving one year with a crown, Vance was dubbed the “czar” by his friends, and the name stuck. The Scene recently caught up with Vance to talk about some of his favorite beers and food items on the menu, and what you can expect when you visit The Czar’s Brewery. How long has The Czar’s Brewery been around? We had a soft opening on Dec. 20, just over a year from when I first looked at the space. We started the actual physical project last April. It’s an old building, so there was an extensive amount of work that needed to be done. We’re planning on doing an official grand opening on the 28th [of January].

I definitely think one of the things that separates us from other breweries is that we can be agile by turning our beer over quickly, while still having multiple selections and being responsive to what customers want. If you’re looking for a New England IPA that is fresh, this is the place to be, because we are brewing constantly.

What is your personal favorite dish? What makes The Czar’s Brewery My personal favorite food is unique? definitely the Megadog. There are We have a small space where we’re basically an endless amount of choices only operating a three-barrel system. So you can get for toppings. You can get it

SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 16

Photos courtesy of The Czar’s Brewery.

with chili, cheese sauce, or all types of paying attention to what your customers and employees are saying and thinking, mustards, ketchups and relishes. then you won’t make it in this business. What is a dish or a beer that everyone I think you have to always be tuned in to what is going on around you and to should try? Our New England IPA is an try to make adjustments when needed. outstanding beer that’s super fresh with some great citrus notes. On the food What is your favorite thing about side of things, I would say probably the being on the Seacoast? I just love that it’s so vibrant and charcuterie board, which is a perfect diverse. I think that even though it’s dish for two people to share. one of the oldest towns in the state, What is an essential skill to running Exeter is growing and becoming more a brewpub? of a downtown destination. The ability to listen. If you’re not — Matt Ingersoll


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FOOD

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We’re into the first full week of 2020, and more than likely you’ve returned to a normal pattern of eating — the holiday mindset of “It’s Monday, let’s celebrate with charcuterie and wine” is gone. In fact, a Monday meal in January is more likely to be salad and water. However, there’s no need for healthy eating to be boring; I can help solve that issue. First, you should go back to last week’s issue of the Hippo or go to thinktasty. Blackberry Parfait. Photo by Michele Pesula Kuegler. com, and you’ll find a great recipe for a Warm Sweet Potato Salad with butter and sugar, they’re just added with Spinach & Cranberries. Second, in their simple crumb state to provide a you should keep reading to learn how I little crunch. Of course, the healthy nature of this can keep you on the healthy eating path while also satisfying your sweet tooth. dessert doesn’t mean that it’s boring. Just because you’re eating healthy Not at all! You have creamy layers doesn’t mean that your cravings for all of yogurt topped with sweet and tart things sweet will go away. It’s especially blackberry layers and a nice bit of hard after the holiday season where it seems graham cracker in the middle. It’s got that desserts are everywhere you turn. Go to enough texture, flavor, and sweetness a cocktail party, stop by the break room at to convince your brain you’re indulging the office, or simply head home, and there while keeping your diet in check. Here’s to continued healthy eating in are bound to be sweet treats there to greet you. All of that can make it tough to go cold January 2020! turkey on the sweets. Michele Pesula Kuegler has been This week’s recipe will help. There’s a nice amount of sweetness in this thinking about food her entire life. Since dessert, but it’s also still pretty darn 2007, the New Hampshire resident has healthy. The main components are been sharing these food thoughts and yogurt and blackberries with just a recipes at her blog, Think Tasty. Please pinch of crunch from graham crackers. visit thinktasty.com to find more of her Unlike indulgent parfaits these crackers recipes. crumbs are served as is. No toasting Healthy & Sweet Blackberry Parfait of the yogurt. 6 ounces blackberries Sprinkle half of the graham cracker crumbs 1 teaspoon sugar on each dish. 2 graham cracker sheets Top graham cracker crumbs with another 1-1/3 cups vanilla yogurt 1/3 cup yogurt. Place 1/4 of the blackberry mixture on top Place blackberries in a small bowl, and of the yogurt. sprinkle with sugar. Using a muddler or back of a spoon, gently These can be eaten immediately or refrigerated for up to 24 hours. press berries to make a quick, cold sauce. Place graham crackers in a bowl; using a tenderizer or rolling pin, crush into crumbs. Makes 2 servings. (They don’t need to be evenly sized.) Using your serving dish of choice, spoon Note: The parfaits can be stored for a 1/3 cup yogurt into the bottom of each dish. longer period of time, but the crackers Place 1/4 of the blackberry mixture on top crumbs will lose their crunchiness.


DRINK

Lighten up

Reset your beer drinking after the holidays “Which cookies do you want me to take to my office?” my wife asked. “I don’t know, I mean, I’ve had enough of all of them,” I said. And it was true, I had had more than enough of all of the cookies, chocolate chip squares, brownie pie, snickerdoodles and chocolates, not to mention pasta, to get me all the way through 2020. “You can take them all,” I said. At some point during the holidays, it just hits you that, wow, you’ve been consuming a lot of food and maybe it’s time to lighten up — at least that’s the case for me. The same goes for beer. After drinking rich porters and stouts for the past month or so, my taste buds were crying out for something lighter. I’m guessing your taste buds are too. Well, we’re all in luck as craft brewers haven’t forgotten about lighter options. Sometimes, we all just need a beer that tastes like a beer, but maybe we don’t need a mass-produced light beer. Here are six lighter brews to help reinvigorate your taste buds:

Shopping!

at the Country Pale Ale by Wachusett Brewing Co. Courtesy photo.

Perpetual Gruven by Great Rhythm Brewing Co. (Portsmouth) First, you’ve got to love the name, but second, this Kolsch-style ale is brewed with 100-percent German pilsner malt and hops making for a bright, yellow pour, and a very crisp, very refreshing brew. Tommy by Kettlehead Brewing Co. (Tilton) I’ve never tried this one, which is Kettlehead’s first Pilsner, but I think it’s indicative of the changing craft beer movement: yes, IPAs are still king but I think more and more, people are appreciating that craft brewing means more than just IPAs. According to the brewery, you’ll find hints of lemon-lime in this brew.

Handline Kolsch by Devil’s Purse Brewing Co. (South Dennis, Mass.) This German-style kolsch is a great choice when you’re bogged down by the decadence of the season: sort of lemony and fresh smelling, with a very crisp, refreshing character. You don’t Country Pale Ale by Wachusett Brewing have to think too much about it: It tastes Co. (Princeton, Mass.) like a beer. I know, I can’t help but reference this brew, Hell Yes! Helles Lager by Moat but there’s a good reason for it: it’s flavorful, Mountain Smoke House and Brew- extremely easy to drink, but it’s just got a little ing Co. (North Conway) This is just more character to it than the typical massthe epitome of easy living, but while produced “light” options. One of the world’s the brew is quite light, the flavor is pro- great all-around beers. nounced, including notes of caramel you Jeff Mucciarone is a senior account manprobably wouldn’t expect in a brew like this. Refreshing but not overly crisp. ager with Montagne Communications, where Great choice when you’re trying to clean he provides communications support to the New Hampshire wine and spirits industry. out the palate. Boniface by Schilling Beer Co. (Littleton) Schilling boasts an array of quality lighter brews offering beer drinkers more complexity and character than they might expect from a beer on the lighter side. Boniface is “a medium-bodied, yet highly drinkable golden lager with gentle acidity traditionally brewed with an intentionally higher gravity and hop content for shipment out of country. Malt and hops are finely balanced resulting in an exceptionally quenching and clean profile,” according to the brewery.

& , e v o L , e Peac

What’s in My Fridge Cold Snap by Samuel Adams Brewing Co. (Boston) I bought this one for my wife, but I also appreciated this as a change of pace. This has been a regular from Sam Adams in recent years. This is a white ale brewed with “spring spices,” which, according to the brewery, “signals that spring is on its way,” but which I think is utter nonsense since it was available prior to winter even beginning — but let’s not let that detract from what is otherwise a crisp, flavorful and refreshing brew, featuring just a little bit of sweetness. Cheers!

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 19


POP CULTURE

Out for revenge

Smoky Quartz Distillery

Bonnar Spring releases international thriller

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Hampton author Bonnar Spring made Apple Books’ “Winter’s Most Anticipated Reads” with her new thriller Toward the Light, released Jan. 7. The plot centers around Luz Concepcion, a young Guatemalan woman who was relocated as a child with her mother to Portsmouth, New Hampshire, to escape violence. After her mother dies, Luz decides to return to her native country, seeking revenge against the man responsible for killing the rest of her family. That man, Martin Benavides, rose from rebel fighter to president and controls a major drug network. Luz’s resettlement officer, Richard Clement, who now works for the CIA, has his own reasons for wanting Martin dead. Together, Luz and Richard devise a plan in which Luz will work as a nanny to Martin’s grandson in order to get closer to Martin. Luz then finds herself in the world of the CIA, undercover work, strongmen, violent political factions, corruption and drugs, all while struggling with her own moral dilemmas and threat of physical danger. “[Luz] is a real everywoman kind of protagonist,” Spring said. “She’s a woman who desperately wants to accomplish something — revenge — but is in a little over her head and is just trying her best.” Although Luz’s intent is to kill a man, she is the heroine of the story, Spring said, because she is still “trying to make the best choice when there is none.” “If you’re in a situation where all you have are bad choices, what moral compass do you have to follow to make a choice?” she said. Spring drew some inspiration for the story, she said, from the summers she spent travelling to Mexico and Central America while she was growing up in Texas. Her mother was a teacher and would take her along for the trips. “I loved it down there,” she said. “I loved the food. I made friends. I picked up Spanish. I actually just returned a month ago from another trip to Guatemala.” As an ESL teacher for more than 25 years, Spring has met many immigrants and their children who, like her main character and even herself, she said, “have a foot in each culture.” “Some of [my students] still don’t know where they belong as they are trying to negotiate their life in the States,” Spring said. “That’s who I’m writing about. … My protagonist is Guatemalan, but has been away [in New Hampshire] for 20 years, so she is experiencing her native country as a stranger, and that’s so important to the story.” While many thrillers rely on “twists and turns” in the plot that “mess with the readers’ minds,” Spring said, Toward the Light is character-driven and more focused on the

complexity of the characters. The storyline is straightforward, fully formed and doesn’t hide anything from the reader. Spring’s secondary focus in Toward the Light, she said, is atmosphere. “I like to think the setting comes alive,” she said. “I want the readers to see and feel [the setting] through [the characters’] eyes.” While the book is largely for entertainment, Spring said she does want to make the reader think, to put themselves in the protagonist’s position and ask themselves what they would do. “How far down a path of darkness would you be willing to go in order to get revenge for an unforgivable crime?” she said. “That’s what I want people to consider.” Spring will do a few local readings this year, starting with one at the Portsmouth Barnes & Noble on Sunday, Jan. 18. Then, she won’t have any local readings until spring as she will be on a three-month cross-country book tour. She is currently putting the finishing touches on another thriller — this one set in Morocco — and working on a rough draft for a sequel to Toward the Light. — Angie Sykeny Toward the Light by Bonnar Spring The book is available now on Amazon and at most bookstores. Spring will do a reading at Barnes & Noble (45 Gosling Road, Newington) on Sunday, Jan. 18, from 2 to 4:30 p.m. Her next readings won’t be until Thursday, April 16, at 6 p.m. at North Hampton Public Library (237A Atlantic Ave., North Hampton) and Friday, April 17, at 7 p.m. at Water Street Bookstore (125 Water St., Exeter). Visit bonnarspring.com.


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POP CULTURE BOOKS

Volume Control, by David Owen (Riverhead, 260 pages)

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Silence, please. For more than 51 million Americans, there’s either too much of it, or too little. An estimated 1 million of us are completely deaf; roughly 50 million of us have tinnitus, a perpetual ringing or hissing in our ears. I’m one of the latter and joke that I’m part cricket, since I’m accompanied by their song 24-7. David Owen is part cicada. A staff writer for The New Yorker, he’s had that sound in his ears since 2006, when he got off a flight from China with a high-pitched whine in his ears that never left. He wrote about this in The New Yorker in 2017; his new book Volume Control expands on that article and Owen’s search for a relief for his own hearing problems and those of others. There’s a big audience for this topic. Two-thirds of Americans 70 and older have hearing loss, and Baby Boomers who grew up on loud rock ’n’ roll are increasingly among them. Pete Townshend and Eric Clapton are among musicians with severe hearing issues because of long-term exposure to loud music. My own ears were irrevocably damaged on the top row at a BTS concert. “Wear earplugs,” Townshend said. I did. The crickets sing anyway. Owen’s book is a cautionary tale that will likely be read primarily by those who are similarly afflicted; “those of us who can hear are often extraordinarily reckless with this extraordinary gift,” he writes. Owen himself wasn’t reckless; he had a bad cold on that China flight and believes that loss of cabin pressure contributed to his condition. And sometimes it’s not our recklessness to blame, but that of others. Owen’s grandmother’s hearing was permanently damaged when a hunter fired a gun near her ear. Although music — both in live concerts and in earbuds — is a major cause of hearing problems, so too are guns; one professor told Owen that the biggest threat to ears in Texas is recreational shooting. And people who have served in the military have high rates of ear damage. (Not-so-fun fact: One veteran told Owen that he used cigarette butts as ear plugs in Vietnam. Thankfully, the Army now has more high-tech ear protection for soldiers.) The book explores not just tinnitus but total and partial hearing loss, the plethora of hearing aids, the stigma associated with hearing loss, and medical interventions such as cochlear implants, like the radio host Rush Limbaugh has. Among

its more interesting revelations: the village of Chilmark, on Martha’s Vineyard, at one time had the highest concentration of deaf people in the U.S. This was later found to be because of a recessive genetic mutation “whose effects had been multiplied, over generations, by the limited marital opportunities available within what was then an isolated farming and fishing community.” Volume Control provides camaraderie for those of us with ear issues, and is thick with interesting anecdotes but short on hope. Owen has interviewed top hearing doctors but has not found a meaningful solution for his tinnitus. He does offer some useful information — cupping your ears is a surprisingly useful way to home in on specific sounds; Bose makes a product called Hearphones that helps people hear better in noisy environments. But, as he says, “No one should ever take medical advice from a freelance writer,” and the main advice he offers for those seeking solutions is to “start with free, and work your way up the cost ladder.” There’s a German company, for example, that is promoting a therapy that purports to rewire the brain and relieve tinnitus, which is a phantom noise the brain generates when hair cells in the ear have been damaged. But Owen is skeptical of the $4,500 cost and says he expects an app will soon arise that does the same thing for much cheaper. Although Owen is a capable wordsmith, I found Volume Control to plod at times, particularly in his descriptions of how the ear works. To be fair, it’s hard to make discussion of basilar membranes and submicroscopic stereocilia scintillating to the masses. But connected as we are through cicadas and crickets, I expected to be rapt, not mildly interested. Also, one product that the author uses and recommends — Bose’s noise-masking sleepbuds — has been discontinued because of battery issues, and the company is offering refunds through the end of December. (Details on Bose.com.) This was announced shortly before the book was published, so it’s not a failing of Owen or his publisher, but be forewarned. Meanwhile, the book’s most important message is also its simplest: If you have hearing damage, wear earplugs. If you don’t have hearing damage, wear earplugs. As Owen says, “Our ability to deafen ourselves with ordinary activities has never been greater than it is now.” B— Jennifer Graham


POP CULTURE

Going places

Art exhibition features on-location watercolors

Doris Rice. Courtesy photo.

The Seacoast Artist Association’s featured artist for the month of January is Doris Rice, a painter and art instructor. Rice lives on the Seacoast and will have her exhibition, titled “Oh The Places You’ll Go,” displayed at the Artist Association’s gallery in Exeter. “As a young artist, my passion was drawing, which also involved me in printmaking and watercolor,” Rice said. She attended the Moore College of Art in Philadelphia and earned her bachelor of fine arts, learning multiple ways of creating art. After working as an illustrator in an advertising studio for several years, she moved to the Seacoast and started a family. In 1986, Rice attended her first plein air watercolor workshop, which involves painting outdoors, and she has stuck with the technique since. “It was with Judy Wagner, a noted watercolor artist and author of Painting with the Whites of your Paper. Judy and her friend Tony Van Hasselt introduced me to a new world of expression,” said Rice. “The rapid execution and intense on-location focus suits me well. From there, I have grown. I love being outdoors and I love watercolor. It’s a perfect blend for me.” Besides creating art, Rice also teaches painting classes throughout North America and Europe. She began teaching also in 1986, starting at Art East in North Hampton. She has also taught at the Seacoast Artist Association and with youth programs, artistic residences at schools, and nursing homes. Local one-day workshops assist with watercolor skill development. “I currently offer programs for a local nursing home in Rye and a retirement community with classes at three campuses, and [offer] adult education classes twice a year in Kittery, Maine,” she said. Rice hosts weekly travel workshops once a month from March to October, calling them “field trips.”

“We travel to the location and settle in to paint. We stay in a centralized accommodation, often having meals and social time together as we consider the culture, wines, food, history, and of course we paint all of it,” Rice said. “We discover things about ourselves, our own painting styles, our opinions. … It’s an ever-evolving process. One experience leads to another, so the future is always an experience to look forward to.” Some of the European countries Rice has traveled to are France, Italy, Greece, Spain and Portugal. She has also been to various parts of Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, New Mexico and California. While she may return to a location, the experience is never the same and always has a new component. “As an artist as well as a teacher, I am delighted to see new places, be in new locations for new experiences, and to be able to share the world through paintings and bring other artists to a new adventure,” she said. “I find fulfillment in seeing the world around me, and reflecting on what it means to me.” When Rice is not painting, she stays busy with culinary arts. She said she can feel a sense of community around food and finds the creation of foods to be sensory, visual and savory. Rice’s work will be exhibited at the gallery throughout January. The gallery is located at 130 Water St. in Exeter. “The featured artist wall offers the opportunity to find completion with those thoughts and those times. Preparing work for exhibition is a multi-step process, and I am happy to see how many have joined me to bring their art to this level,” she said. While Rice’s work will only be at the gallery for January, she also has her work displayed and available to purchase at Kennedy Gallery at 41 Market St. in Portsmouth. Lightship Editions and Glimmerglass.com are both online galleries, where you can find her work as well. Rice also paints on commission for individuals and organizations. She can be contacted at dorisrice@comcast.net. — Danielle Roberts

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 23


FILM REVIEW BY AMY DIAZ

Something for Every Season The Grudge (R)

Good actors John Cho and Jackie Weaver are somehow in The Grudge, a reboot-y thing of the 2004 movie that was based on a 2002 Japanese horror movie. Sarah Michelle Gellar was mixed up in the original The Grudge series, which Wikipedia says got three movies and I’m pretty sure I saw at least two of them but other than evil skittery beings with stringy hair, I don’t remember much about them. This kind of horror ties with mindless slasher movies as my least favorite kind of horror — the “evil thing messes with you for a loooong time before killing you” movie. Tick tock, evil curse entity. This movie is set in 2004 and 2006, featuring characters along slightly different timelines encountering the evil The Grudge force, which Fiona Landers (Tara Westwood) brings home with her to Pennsylvania from what I think is the same house in Japan from the earlier movies. The Grudge is the toy slime of evil entities in that it is both stuck in a location and stuck to anybody who comes into that location

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The Grudge

even after they leave. Fiona Landers, her husband (David Lawerence Brown) and their young daughter (Zoe Fish) are tormented by the evil. The evil contagion spreads to real estate agent Peter (Cho), trying to sell the Landers house, and his wife Nina (Betty Gilpin — how did this movie get these actors?). Then Detective Wilson (William Sadler), who investigates murders at the Landers house, falls prey to the evil, as do William (Frankie Faison) and his wife Faith (Lin Shaye), who are the house’s next inhabitants, and a nurse (Weaver) who comes to help them. Detective Goodman (Demián Bichir) doesn’t care how many bodies are connected with the house, he’s not going inside. His warning to new partner Detective Muldoon (Andrea Riseborough) to do the same goes unheeded — perhaps, as he later suggests, because she is looking for a distraction as she and her young son deal with the recent death of her husband. All of the various characters’ connections to death and difficulty felt like the movie trying to do, well, something, I was never clear what, but ultimately these elements were just red herrings. A lot of things felt like go-nowhere plot cul de sacs in this movie that ties together all these different The Grudge-encounter vignettes at the end in a way that I appreciated, structurally, even if it didn’t make me enjoy the movie any more. The Grudge isn’t poorly made; it just feels listless to me. I think I need my rage-filled death curse to be a little more lively. C Rated R for disturbing violence and bloody images, terror and some language, according to the MPA. Directed by Nicolas Pesce, who also wrote the screenplay, The Grudge is an hour and 33 minutes long and is distributed by Sony.


NITE

Rhythm generations

Entrain brings its drum-tastic sound to 3S Artspace

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Entrain. Courtesy photo.

Now in its 27th year as a band, Entrain has a fan base that spans across generations — even in founder and leader Tom Major’s own home. “Our little boy’s favorite song is ‘Rise Up’ — he plays it on drums,” Major said in a recent phone interview. “I’m reassured that there is something really special about this music; it really translates to so many different ages and demographics.” As a result, Entrain is doing a lot more family-friendly shows, like one upcoming at 3S Artspace in Portsmouth on Jan. 11. “We’ve been morphing into the performance spaces; less of the nightclub dance party,” he said. “We like playing early … 8 to 11 is a perfect time for music lovers of all ages. We’ve become multi-generational good vibe entertainment.” Playing listening room shows provides opportunities to stretch out creatively and draw from a deep catalog of over 100 songs. “We can change the energy a little, get a bit more ebb and flow [so] you don’t have to be on your feet jammin’ all night long,” he said. “Obviously, it’s Entrain, so it’s going to be a lot of dancing — we can’t keep people down! If there’s any room at all, they’ll find a way to dance.” Mixing things up is in Major’s DNA; Entrain has moved through many different lineups over the years. “We have kind of like this revolving door,” he said. “It never closes, with players leaving and returning.” Andrew Gravel, a member in the early 2000s who now leads his own band, The Gravel Project, will sing and play guitar for the Portsmouth show, joined by saxophone players Rob Loyot and Hillary Noble, bass player Talewa and Lennie Peterson on trombone. Everyone in the band plays drums, “or they wouldn’t be in Entrain; if they didn’t play before they joined the band, they learned real quickly,” Major said. Even the bass player hits the skins. “Talewa is a really good percussionist, he’s got such a great groove,” Major said.

Six multi-instrumentalists sharing a stage makes for a kinetic and unique show, he said. “The thing that kind of separates us from most bands is we can really shift gears easily from a full-on six-piece drum ensemble [to] mixing up percussion and horns as well as mixing up the grooves. To be honest, I get bored really fast. I hear bands that have great music and I love it, but I’m going, ‘Well, that sounds just like the last song and the one before’ — one groove through the whole album. I love to shift gears, from a reggae tune to a Brazilian one, to funk, to a ballad. Keep it interesting.” His restlessness extends to other endeavors; Major had a plentitude of projects. Last year, he helped recreate Santana’s Woodstock performance for the festival’s 50th anniversary, and worked on tribute shows to both Paul Simon’s Graceland album and the Who’s rock opera Tommy. He’s also part of Grateful Dead/Allman Brothers hybrid band Steal Your Peach, led by Pittsfield musician Rev Tor, as well as Led Zeppelin and Mardi Gras flavored ensembles. After 20 years living on Martha’s Vineyard, Major relocated to Stockbridge, Mass., recently, with greater proximity to many venues. “I can get to Albany in 45 minutes, and New York City or Boston in a couple of hours,” he said. “On the Vineyard, all I could do is go north, but here I can go in any direction. … I feel like I’m back in the real world again.” With the new year, Major’s focus is back on the band he’s led since 1993. “Life is good; I’m looking forward to 2020 and beyond,” he said. “As long as I am able to keep cranking, I’m going to keep Entrain alive in some form or another.” — Michael Witthaus

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Entrain When: Saturday, Jan. 11, 8 p.m. Where: 3S Artspace, 319 Vaughan St., Portsmouth Tickets: $20 advance ($18 members) at 3sarts.org SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 25


BEACH BUM FUN JONESIN’ CROSSWORDS BY MATT JONES

“You Turned Up” — I’m just following directions Across 1 Coat of arms inscription 6 Dir. from NYC to Seattle 9 Sibilant sound 13 In the vicinity of 14 “The Beatles at ___ Stadium”

(music documentary) 15 Minimal amount 16 ?keep a kaenS 19 Collapsible shelter 20 Paleozoic and Cenozoic, e.g. 21 What baby shampoo avoids

22 Hybrid citrus from Jamaica 24 Propped open 26 ?loot s’tsirucinaM 30 “___ a Rainbow” (Rolling Stones tune) 34 ___ apso (dog breed) 35 Prescriptions, briefly 37 “Mixed-ish” network 38 “You’ve Got Mail” ISP 39 With 49-Across, ?retsis s’anereS 42 Blazers’ org. 43 Unhealthy 44 High or low cards 45 “Li’l” guy in the comics 47 Take five 49 See 39-Across 52 “___ be surprised” 54 “... ___ it seems” 55 Birch of “Ghost World”

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58 “Flashdance” director Adrian 60 Paintball mark 64 ?rekrowoc s’rotcudnoC 67 Precious metal sources 68 “Eat, ___, Love” 69 ___-Whirl (amusement park ride) 70 Second to ___ 71 Wood used to make baseball bats 72 Fabled tale-teller Down 1 Beer ingredient 2 Symphony orchestra woodwind 3 “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?” character 4 Onomatopoetic name for motorized rickshaws 5 First N.L. player to hit 500 home runs 6 “Hold up!” 7 Company’s bottom line 8 When doubled, a guitar effect 9 Job opening fillers 10 Only state name starting with two vowels 11 Head the cast 12 Reports 14 Feature of a font 17 Assist 18 Sched. guess 23 Tropical fruit with pink flesh 25 Baby Yoda, eventually (one

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presumes) 26 Prime minister between Major and Brown 27 “Head Like ___” (Nine Inch Nails song) 28 They may be recorded for quality and training purposes 29 “Hello, ___ Be Going!” (Phil Collins album) 31 Barbera’s animation partner 32 Diminished 33 Do a haunted house job 36 Catches 40 Raw silk shade 41 Annoying ones 46 “Two-bite” bakery item, maybe 48 Actor Gibson of “2 Fast 2 Furious” 50 “The Daily Show” correspondent Chieng 51 Neighbor of Nev. 53 Rafter’s need 55 Disney movie about computers 56 Lifesaver, maybe 57 Subway fixture 59 “I know” 61 Wriggly tankful 62 “Dallas Buyers Club” Oscar winner Jared 63 Sandy golf hazard 65 Hotel offering 66 “Give ___ go!” © 2019 Matt Jones

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 26


BEACH BUM FUN HOROSCOPES All quotes are from Girl, Stop Apologizing, by Rachel Hollis, born Jan. 9, 1983. • Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) You are a combination of the five people you hang out with most. … Who do you see most often / whose words are you consuming frequently? Which points of view and perceptions do you take in on the regular? These are good questions. • Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) Friends, your struggles don’t mean you’re weak; they mean you’re human. Your inexperience doesn’t mean you won’t succeed; it just means you haven’t yet. Stop pretending. Stop faking it. Stop suffering in silence. Stop setting yourself up as a martyr. Stop taking it all on alone and then feeling bitter about it. Fake not faking it until you make it. • Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) Why do I hang out in a room I don’t fit in and keep attempting to learn something I’m not particularly skilled at, all while others watch and judge and draw their own conclusions? Because it makes me happy. And if it doesn’t, don’t. • Aries (March 21 – April 19) It wasn’t until I started the practice of waking up an hour before my children that I understood how powerful it is to get ahead of the day. Now, I am intentionally planning my morning routine around the kind of day I want to have, because if you own the morning, then you own the day. If you own the day, then you own the week. Stay humble. • Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Yesterday the school called to tell me that Ford is the very last child (out of all the incoming kindergartners) who still needs to turn in his paperwork. You guys, I didn’t even know what paperwork she was talking about. Whose paperwork is it, really? • Gemini (May 21 – June 20) So I refuse to teach [my kids] that you should pursue your

dreams but simultaneously be ashamed of them. Yeah, it’s one or the other. • Cancer (June 21 – July 22) When everything is important, nothing is important. A few things are a little bit important. • Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) We have to do the necessary initial work if we’re going to move forward in other ways. We need to set ourselves up to win. Even though sometimes the initial work feels like taking a step back. • Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) This isn’t about what you’re giving up; this is about proving to yourself that you can keep your word. And proving to your stomach that it can in fact survive without Chick-fil-A sauce for an extended period of time. It’s nice to know you truly have options. • Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room. If you’re in the wrong room, are you really that smart? • Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) Now when I have anxiety, I go on a long run. I go work out. By the way, I used to hate people who are like, ‘If you feel stressed, go work out.’ I’d think, Screw you, Pam! We’re not all made like that, okay?! Except neither is Pam. She’s just choosing a better activity to manage what she’s feeling. She’s taught herself a great habit. It doesn’t have to be running or working out. It could be playing chess or making felt rabbits. • Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) Have you ever heard that saying that if you can give up something for a month, it becomes a habit? Well, I want you to make a habit of not eating garbage. Garbage in this instance is fast food or processed food or anything Krispy Kreme makes! Krispy Kreme begs to differ.

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SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 27


BEACH BUM FUN ROCKANDROLLCROSSWORDS.com BY TODD SANTOS

I’M NOT YOUR STEPPING PUZZLE Across

1. You hail him from club to home 7. 1985 Rick Springfield album about Eastern “way”, perhaps 10. Producer/artist Brian that worked w/ Coldplay 13. Willie Nelson will place ‘__ Row’ (3,2,1) 14. You hope to not see one breaking up

a house party your band is rocking 16. ‘87 Marianne Faithfull album (7,7) 18. They tap to good music 19. The Eagles ride in the ‘Fast’ one 20. Iconic ‘Sailing’ Stewart 21. One might march to a Dave Matthews Band concert 22. Type of list taped to stage floor 23. Ratt is not happy and going to ‘__

It Down’ 25. Founding Stones pianist (abbr) 28. Debaucherous Gamma Ray song? 30. Ramones ‘Life’s __ __’ (1,3) 31. Bob Dylan ‘Belle __’ 33. U2 ‘__ __ Little While’ (2,1) 34. ‘The Show Goes On’ Fiasco 35. Monkees ‘(I’m Not Your) __ __’ (8,5) 39. Bad Religion ‘New __’ 40. Alphabetical Jackson 5 hit 41. Pollard from Sebadoh 42. Who Leftover Salmon built ‘Bridges’ to 43. What factory did to hot new album 46. Queens Of The Stone Age ‘I __ By The Ocean’ 47. Legendary ‘Happy Birthday, Twenty-One!’ West 48. “Tie a yellow ribbon ‘round the old

12/26

__ tree” 49. GnR ‘Chinese Democracy’ jam (abbr) 52. Joseph Arthur ‘__ Paints Me Gold’ 54. Clueless film-inspired Sara Evans song? (2,2) 56. You’re getting a musical one now 57. Uncle Kracker & U2 songs w/same title (2,1,6,5) 60. __ __ Hoople (4,3) 61. What you did before putting Pink Floyd on, perhaps 62. Electrify 63. What wardrobe will do to spandex rip 64. Recorders, back in the day

Down

1. ‘Everybody Got Their Something’ Nikka 2. Brian Jonestown Massacre’s Newcombe 3. Prince ‘Raspberry __’ 4. Musical snob’s leaning 5. Band crash spot on the road 6. ‘Peaceful Easy Feeling’ band 7. Springsteen cover ‘Santa Claus Is Coming To __’ 8. Beatles ‘I’ve Got __ __’ (1,7) 9. Steve Winwood ‘Arc __ __ Diver’ (2,1) 10. Bunnymen’s leader 11. UK rockers This Town __ __ (5,4) 12. Skynyrd “Outlaws, renegades, rebels on the run” song (abbr) 15. Tesla “__ __ so hard” (1,3) 17. ‘72 Allman Brothers album ‘__ __

Peach’ (3,1) 22. ‘04 Drowning Pool hit ‘__ Up’ 24. Silverchair ‘__ Song (Open Fire)’ 26. Dylan/The Band ‘The Basement __’ 27. What Megadeth will do to ‘The Man’ 28. ‘99 Jars Of Clay album ‘If __ __ The Zoo’ (1,4) 29. Cars ‘__ You’re Gone’ 30. Singing with power 31. Elle Fitzgerald “__ rainbow blending now, we’ll have a happy ending now” 32. ‘09 Three Days Grace album ‘Life __ __’ (6,3) 36. __ Was A Rollin’ Stone 37. Brian & Katie Torwalt ‘__ __ You In, God’ (1,7) 38. Might make a long one to get to front row 39. Levon Helm ‘300 __’ 44. ‘Redefine’ band that has a potter’s need? 45. Sade “Your love has found the __ hiding place” 47. “I’ll stop the world and __ w/you” 49. Foxy Shazam tasted it, then wrote: ‘__ __ It’ (1,4) 50. “Slap me with a splintered __” Alanis 51. UK’s Lightning __ 53. George Strait ‘I __ Everything’ 55. What Green Day made out of their ‘Brain’ 56. Blondie ‘Pork __’ 57. Tech N9NE ‘__ __ Playa’ (2,1) 58. Who ‘__ Hard’ 59. Pearl Jam ‘Vs’ song (abbr) © 2020 Todd Santos

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NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

Bright ideas

A romney ewe living on a farm near Auckland, New Zealand, is getting some relief from an unusual problem, thanks to a clever veterinarian and a brassiere meant for humans. Rose the sheep had suffered damage to her udders when she produced a high volume of milk during her pregnancy with triplets. “When this happens,” Dr. Sarah Clews told Stuff, “the udder can hang so low that it can be traumatized on the ground.” The condition can sometimes be a cause for euthanasia, but Dr. Clews thought a bra might help lift the udders and allow them to heal. Rose’s owners eventually located a 24J maternity bra big enough to do the job, and it worked -- after two or three weeks of wearing the bra, Rose’s udders recovered enough that surgery was no longer needed. Justin and Nissa-Lynn Parson of McKinney, Texas, were all in when their son Cayden, 12, asked for a magnifying glass for Christmas. “We thought, ‘Oh, he wants to magnify something’” to read, Nissa-Lynn told KDFW. Instead, Cayden and his brother, Ashton, used the glass to light a newspaper on fire on the family’s front porch, which soon spread to the yard, eventually destroying the lawn and some of the family’s Christmas lights. “We ran inside and started screaming,” Cayden said. The family doused the fire with “pitchers of water, blankets smothering it, sprinklers turned on, hose turned on,” Nissa-Lynn recounted, adding that now Cayden “will definitely have yard work to do once spring comes.”

Least competent criminal

In Jefferson County, Colorado, would-be car thief Todd Sheldon, 36, has finally admitted it’s just not the vocation for him, according to police. Fox News reported Sheldon had tried over recent weeks to steal multiple vehicles, according to the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office, but each time he was caught in the act — first by a homeowner, then by sheriff’s deputies minutes later “just down the street,” shocking the deputies by telling them, “I’m trying to steal this truck.” He was taken into custody and bonded out, but a week later, deputies responding to a report of someone trying to break into a car again found Sheldon. “I really suck at this,” Sheldon allegedly told an officer. Sheldon remained in jail as of Dec. 27.

Bah, humbug!

Green huffed: “The Academy has the highest of expectations around uniform and teaching and learning, and ... whilst it was a remarkably creative hairstyle, it was, unfortunately, inappropriate for school.”

Oops!

As she enjoyed an Aldi mince pie in early December, caterer Angela McGill, 52, of Glasgow, Scotland, thought one bite seemed particularly “rough and really hard — I thought it was a tough piece of pastry!” she told Metro News. Instead, McGill soon realized she had swallowed her partial dentures with two false teeth. Hospital X-rays confirmed the dentures were caught halfway down her throat, but the staff advised her pulling them out would only cause more harm. It took 72 hours for the plate to pass. “It was ever so funny!” she said. “And I was really enjoying the mince pie, too.” Sandra Smith, 59, of St. Petersburg, Florida, was cited for careless driving on Dec. 29, after crashing her 1994 Oldsmobile Cutlass into a mausoleum at the Memorial Park Funeral Home and Cemetery, damaging the facades of three above-ground graves, WFLA reported. Florida Highway Patrol troopers said Smith was driving in a grass lot at the cemetery when she “failed to avoid a mausoleum on the property.” Her passenger, 63-year-old Betty Strickland, went to the hospital with critical injuries.

marriage. But before Christmas, as James was plotting a way to get back at Kelly for a “dodgy” haircut she’d given him, he came up with a gloriously permanent idea: He had his thigh tattooed with a less-than-flattering photo of Kelly, asleep on a plane with her mouth gaping open, as James mocked her behind her head. “I’m one up at the moment,” James told the Sun, “but I’m also scared because I don’t know what she’s now planning.” Kelly was unforgiving: “I was horrified. I couldn’t believe it. ... We do mess about anyway, but this is on another level. ... He needs to watch his back.”

Sour grapes

Japanese YouTuber Marina Fujiwara has harnessed the pain she feels when she sees couples basking in their love at the holidays and developed a sort of schadenfreudean device: a light that turns on whenever anyone breaks up on social media. Oddity Central reported on Dec. 27 that Fujiwara’s device is connected to the internet through a “bridge” and is set to light up whenever a breakup status is posted on Twitter. “I want to celebrate Christmas,” she said. “But when you see a couple in the

world going on a Christmas date and doing something like that, I am attacked by a huge sense of loneliness.” While her machine is not available commercially, Fujiwara says it’s easy enough to set one up for yourself. (Check her YouTube channel for directions.)

Dreams do come true

Joan, 89, and her friend Pauline, 84, had their wishes fulfilled in early December after asking administrators at the Glastonbury Court care home in Bury St. Edmunds, England, for an attractive man with a “large chest and big biceps” to visit. Sure enough, a male stripper dressed as a fireman arrived at the home to entertain the ladies, waving his belt around his head as he danced for them. “I wish he could visit us every day!” gushed Joan to the Daily Mail. “He made me feel like I was young again.” Joan made her request through the home’s wishing tree initiative, which others have used to ask for things like a shopping trip or a day at the beach. “This isn’t the typical kind of visitor we have,” said home manager Sharlene Van Tonder, “but based on the response, he was one of the most popular.” Visit newsoftheweird.com.

Precocious

The newest tattoo artist in the Haji Lane area of Singapore is Lilith Siow, 12. She learned the art from her father, Joseph, who has operated a tattoo business for 20 years, reported Asia One on Dec. 30. In the past year, Lilith has tattooed at least a dozen customers, although she admitted that she was nervous at first, taking 90 minutes to complete her first. “I was afraid at the beginning. ... Once a tattoo sets, it is forever,” she said. As her confidence grows, so does her advocacy for the art: She disagrees that people with tattoos are “bad people.”

Animal shenanigans

Police in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, were called Dec. 27 to the parking lot of a CVS pharmacy over a “public menace,” according to WKYT. The culprit was a “hostile chicken” that “pecked viciously” at the officers and “made some adept use of vehicles for cover” before they were able to corral it in a plastic milk crate, according to the police department’s Facebook page. Officers transferred the foul fowl to “someone who can give him more suitable accommodations,” then attended to their wounds with “some doughnut therapy.”

Poppy Leigh, 13, of Manchester, England, hoped wrapping her waist-length hair around an empty plastic water bottle and decorating it with lights like a Christmas tree atop her head would bring good cheer to her mates and teachers at Manchester Health Academy on Dec. 20. Instead, school authorities told her she had to either take the decorations off or go True love home. Her mom, Christie, wasn’t happy about Kelly McGraw, 37, of Portsmouth, England, it: “It’s just a bit of fun and Christmas cheer,” and her husband, James, 40, have enjoyed she told Metro News. But Principal Kevin playing pranks on each other throughout their SEACOAST SCENE | JANUARY 9 - 22, 2020 | PAGE 30

PET OF THE WEEK Foxy is a 6-year-old German Shepherd that is happiest when she’s on the go. She loves going on walks, and she especially loves chasing tennis balls in the outdoor pens. She runs like the wind and could go on forever and ever. Foxy would make a terrific running or hiking partner and would appreciate a fenced in yard so she can play ball as needed. When she’s not active, Foxy likes to cuddle. Her boundless energy and her loving disposition would pair well with a like-minded family. She needs a home without dogs or cats and if there are kids, they should be at least teen-aged. Foxy does have some special medical needs – please call the New Hampshire SPCA in Stratham for more info at 772-2921 or visit nhspca.org.


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