Seacoast Scene 03-05-20

RUN FOR IT P. 14

STORYTELLING FOR DAYS P. 22

MARCH 5 - 18, 2020

Basketball, volleyball, tennis and more athletics for adults

INSIDE: A DANCE PARTY & A HEAVENLY BALL

A WORD FROM LARRY

Master McGrath’s

Business in North Hampton

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*KENO*

I want to give a shout out to the North Hampton Business Association. Its mission is to “provide area businesses with networking, education and marketing opportunities while offering unified Larry Marsolais advocacy to town government and an avenue for community involvement.”

The NHBA was established in the early 1980s by a group of North Hampton business owners to be the voice of the business owners in the town. In addition to hosting networking and educational events for members, they work closely with all members of the town government to ensure that the association’s interests are heard and

protected. It also strives to find ways to promote shop local initiatives such as the upcoming March Madness week, March 16 to March 22. For this week they actively promote that local residents and surrounding communities shop, eat, and enjoy all that the local businesses have to offer.

Find out more about the NHBA at nhbalocal.com. For our last winter issue, March 19, there will be a special four-page pull out section all about the NHBA, so make sure to pick up a copy.

As always feel free to call me anytime at 603-935-5096 to discuss local issues or to place an ad.

Larry Marsolais is the general manager of the Seacoast Scene and the former president of the Hampton Rotary Club.

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Advertising Staff Larry Marsolais Seacoast Scene General Manager 603-935-5096 larry@seacoastscene.net

BREAKFAST SATURDAY & SUNDAY 8am-2pm

Editorial Staff Editor Meghan Siegler editor@seacoastscene.net

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COVER STORY 6 Indoor sports

MAPPED OUT 12 Beaches, restrooms, where to walk your dog and more

PEOPLE & PLACES 13 The coolest Seacoast dwellers and scenes

FOOD 18 Eateries and foodie events

POP CULTURE 22 Books, art, theater and classical

NITE LIFE 24 Music, comedy and more

BEACH BUM FUN 26 Puzzles, horoscopes and crazy news

Have an event or a story idea for the Seacoast Scene? Let us know at: editor@seacoastscene.net

Your weekly guide to the coast.

Published every Thursday (1st copy free; 2nd $1).

Unsolicited submissions are not accepted and will not be returned or acknowledged.

Unsolicited submissions will be destroyed.

Seacoast Scene PO Box 961 Hampton NH 03843 603-935-5096 | www.seacoastscene.net

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4 SHORE THINGS

EVENTS TO CHECK OUT MARCH 5 - 18, 2020, AND BEYOND Paint party

KB’s Bagels and Java in Hampton is hosting a Mandala Stone Paint Party Saturday, March 7, at 3 p.m. Come in for a relaxing afternoon and learn the ancient craft of mandalas, which have been used as a tool in meditation and yoga. Tickets are $25 and must be purchased in advance (find them on eventbrite.com). All materials will be provided.

Seussical the Musical

See Seussical the Musical at Winnacunnet High School in Hampton, with showtimes March 13 and March 14 at 7 p.m. and March 15 at 2 p.m.

Tickets are $10 adults, $7 students/seniors. Prior to the March 15 show, have tea with the Cat in the Hat and Horton from 1 to 2 p.m. The cost is $10 per child and includes refreshments, a photo op with the Cat in the Hat and/or Horton and a ticket to the matinee. Tickets available at eventbrite.com.

Make it maple

Join the fourth-graders at Lincoln Akerman School in Hampton Falls on Saturday March 14, from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. for the annual sugaring off party. Tours will be provided. Additionally, maple syrup samples and maple candy will be available as well as a cookout.

About those bees

Salisbury Public Library is showing the documentary Pollinators Thursday, March 12, from 6 to 8 p.m. The film follows migratory beekeepers and their honey bees as they pollinate the flowers that become the fruits, nuts and vegetables we all eat. It also explains the challenges the beekeepers and their bees face. The event is free and open to the public. Contact Sara Marsh at 978-465-5071 x136 or cmarsh@salisburylibrary. org for more information.

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 6

Pickleball players at The RIM Sports Complex in Hampton. Courtesy photo.

With the amount of youth sports options through school, rec leagues or camps, team sports for adults may seem harder to come by. With two indoor sports complexes right in Hampton, plus other options in the Seacoast area, there are plenty of opportunities for adults to join a team.

THE RIM

The RIM Sports Complex in Hampton offers many different leagues, camps, and clinics featuring men and women’s basketball, pickleball and co-ed volleyball. It also offers athletic performance training and open gym time for anyone who wants to play basketball.

The RIM offers a men’s basketball league every season of the year. The upcoming spring season for Divisions 2 and 3 started March 2, but it’s not too late to join a team (for details on all programs at The Rim, call 603-601-7586 or visit therimsports.com).

“Men’s league is very popular here,” said Adina Beaudry, facility manager.

The RIM also offers a summer women’s basketball league for ages 17 and up starting June 3. Each of the eight games will be played on a Wednesday with a similar single-game elimination playoff.

Beaudry explained that they are trying to get the word out about the league, especial-

ly to college students coming back for the summer.

For each of these leagues, there will be player of the game awards with weekly write-ups on Facebook as well as stat keeping and Facebook and Instagram live.

The RIM also offers open gym space throughout the day during the week, from 1 to 9 p.m. It costs $9 a day or $25 a month to play. You can check court availability by visiting their website or calling.

The RIM’s King and Queen of the Court co-ed volleyball league is returning soon.

They have no set dates yet but check their website for updated information. The games will be held on Monday nights.

Pickleball is offered on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1 to 4 p.m. It costs $5 a session.

The RIM also offers athletic performance training inside of their facility.

Through a program called T1 Training, adults (and kids) can receive strength and conditioning training.

“T1 is a great asset for us,” Beaudry said.

According to Beaudry, the RIM is trying to expand on the different programs they are going to offer, including other sports and martial arts, and they’re planning a cornhole tournament this summer.

“We’re just trying to keep building on our existing programs,” Beaudry said. 8

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 7

The Sports Barn’s 2019 Summer Session Div. 1 basketball champions. Courtesy photo.

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for any requests or information regarding renting out courts or just general questions about leagues.

Because of the sport court floors that the Barn has, they are able to offer indoor tennis. They offer different types of programs, ranging from adult social programs to weekly drop-ins and more. The Friday night adult social program, for example, runs from 7 to 9 p.m. To get a spot, individuals must sign up before noon on Thursdays. The cost is $15 per session and $20 at the door if there is space.

“People can sign up individually or with friends,” Cyr said. “This also allows people to play with people they don’t know and get to know others.”

There is also another social tennis program that runs on Thursdays from 11:30 a.m. to 1 p.m. where groups can sign up for $12 weekly or $100 for an 11-week session.

The Barn rents out rackets for $5.

As of right now, the Sports Barn is building up its volleyball program. They offered a co-ed volleyball session during the winter, but because of AAU basketball coming in the spring, they have yet to decide if they will do another league or wait until summer to pick it back up.

“We’re trying to make the Sports Barn a place where we keep adding and revolving programs around to keep them new and fresh, and try to offer something for everybody,” Cyr said.

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The Sports Barn in Hampton offers four indoor courts with ample opportunities for adults to join in on the fun of getting active and jumping back into a sport. The multiple-purpose material the courts are made of makes setting up a wide variety of sports seamless.

The Sports Barn offers multiple men’s basketball leagues, with Divisions 1-3, so no matter one’s skill set, there is a league for everyone.

They also offer a men’s 45+ drafted basketball league, where the rules are a bit different, which can be reviewed on their website. Each team will play 10 games with two 20-minute running halves, with a double-elimination playoff format.

And to top it off, beer and food specials are offered after each game if you need a little extra motivation to enter the draft pool for this league.

While they don’t offer a women’s league, Chad Cyr, general manager of the Barn, explains that if interest is expressed about the opportunity, they wouldn’t hesitate to get one going.

You can also rent out courts through the Barn, from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. on weekdays from anywhere from $30 to $55 per hour depending on availability and demand.

There is no membership needed either. You can contact the Sports Barn at 603-9262276 or email coatesnew@hotmail.com

Local recreation departments also have nonsport adult programming that will keep you moving. Find activities like yoga, Zumba, strength training and meditation in Hampton, Seabrook and Rye. If your town doesn’t have the activity you want, most rec departments allow non-residents to join their

programs if there is space and for a slightly higher fee. Find out what’s available in your town or a neighboring town: Hampton: hamptonrec.recdesk.com Seabrook: Seabrookrec.com Rye: town.rye.nh.us/recreation

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The RIM Sports Complex’s 2019 Summer Mens League Div. 2 basketball champions. Courtesy photo.

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pick-up games will be held through earHampton and Rye’s recreation depart- ly June, and registration is still open. Visit ments also offer a few indoor sports for hamptonrec.recdesk.com for more info or to register. adults to participate in.

TOWN REC SPORTS

Starting today, March 5, the Rye Recreation Department is offering adult pick-up basketball at Rye Elementary School every Thursday night in March from 8:15 to 9:15 p.m. There is no charge but those who are interested should contact the rec department prior to joining in case of schedule changes. There are also Sunday morning sessions from 9 to 11 a.m. at Rye Junior High. You can sign up for these through the Rye Recreation site by visiting town.rye. nh.us/recreation and downloading the 2020 spring registration form.

Rye Rec also offers group tennis lessons for adults on Wednesdays from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. at the New Castle Recreation facility.

10

Adults shouldn’t have all the fun It’s baseball season, and local rec departments are accepting registrations for kids’ leagues now.

twice a week during the season. Tee-ball is for ages 4 and 5; there will be two events for this per week.

In Seabrook, the Seabrook Cal Ripken Baseball league is now open for registration. Pricing is as follows: tee-ball (pre-k to k) is $60; Farm (first grade) is $70; U8 Farm (second grade) is $80; Minors (grades 3 and 4) is $90, and Majors (grades 5 through 7) is $100. There is a sibling maximum fee of $200. The season starts April 1 and goes until June 30.

Majors and AAA season registration for Rye Little League, which serves Rye, North Hampton and New Castle, have already passed but the AA and tee-ball leagues are open for registration until April 15 with a late fee after March 15. AA is for boys and girls ages 6 to 9; teams will meet

The Hampton Youth Association Seacoast Cal Ripken Baseball program for Hampton, Hampton Falls, North Hampton and South Hampton provides youth baseball for children ages 3 to 12. The registration deadline is March 7 and the opening day is May 8.

The divisions are Pee-wee (pre-k), $60; Tee-ball (kindergarten), $60; Rookie (grades 1 and 2), $80; AAA (grades 3 and 4), $100, and Majors (grades 5 through 7), $100. Players eligible for AAA and Majors are required to attend a players’ evaluations and rating event to ensure safety; this will be held at Seacoast United in Hampton on Sunday, March 15, from 5 to 8 p.m.

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The Hampton Parks and Recreation Department currently has two adult sports programs: Adult Recess and Men’s Basketball. Adult Recess is held Mondays and Wednesdays in March (the program is underway, but enrollment is open until March 11, and there are still spaces available). It’s held at the Hampton Academy gym and runs from 6:30 to 9 p.m. (come and go as your schedule allows) and features a different sport each evening, like floor hockey, soccer, pickleball, wiffleball, kickball, beach-ball volleyball, basketball and others. Men’s basketball is held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7 to 9:30 p.m. in the Hampton Academy gym. These

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The Sports Barn’s 2018 mixed double tennis team. Courtesy photo.

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The lessons will be taught by USPTA Professional Mark Moulton. The first session begins April 8 and ends on May 13. Rackets are not included. The second session begins on May 20 and ends on June 17.

Finally, Rye Rec has golf lessons for adults, taught by Timothy Riese, a PGA Head Professional, at the Pease Golf Course in Portsmouth. Adults will get a full lesson on their set-up, short and full swing game.

There are two sessions for both men and women: Session 1 for men is Thursdays during May from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. Session 2 is Thursdays in June starting June 11 and ending July 2 at the same time. The women’s sessions are on Tuesdays starting May 5, from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. The other sessions start on June 9 and go until June 30 at the same time. Visit town.rye.nh.us/recreation for more on any of these programs.

Local YMCAs The YMCA of the Seacoast in Portsmouth offers a variety of activities for adults. For sports, there’s access to an open gym, and there are organized games of pickleball, volleyball and basketball.

Want to improve your swimming? There are two Adult Learn to Swim classes, the first one from 5:40 to 6:30 p.m. for those with no experience, and the other from 6:30 to 7:15 p.m. They also offer a free Adult Aquatic Exercise class for members. This class is a water-based exercise class with low impact, according to the website. They offer Advanced Aquacise as well and an Aqua Zumba class too. A Master Class is offered every Monday, Wednesday and Friday from noon to 1 p.m. This class provides workouts surrounding all four competitive swim strokes and on Wednesdays is taught by a certified U.S. Masters Swimming Coach.

Visit graniteymca.org/programs/adult for up-to-date details on adult programming.

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They have four courts in their facility, as well as a second level with a full gym and two studios.

The Y offers basketball leagues in the spring. They offer a men’s 18+ basketball league starting May 12. There are two divisions, A and B, and you can sign up for them by visiting the Plaistow YMCA’s website, northshoreymca.org/locations/ plaistow-community-ymca/programs.

They also offer a Legends 50+ winter basketball league that started at the beginning of February that you can still join as a free agent by visiting their site. Games are played on Mondays from 6 to 7 p.m.

Games will be played in the league until April 13.

The Y offers both men’s and women’s floor hockey. Both leagues are 18+ and start in April and end in June. The men’s games are played on Mondays from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m., and the women’s games are played on Wednesdays from 6 to 7 p.m.

The Plaistow YMCA also offers pickleAt the Plaistow YMCA there is a variety ball six days a week in the morning. Visit of men’s and women’s leagues for adults. northshoreymca.org for details.

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JOAN COX LIBRARIAN AT SALISBURY PUBLIC LIBRARY

How did you come up with these programs with dogs?

We first started hosting ‘Sit, Stay and Read’ a couple of years ago. Joyce, who brings her golden retriever Thor to our library, visits other libraries for similar programs. We thought it sounded fun, educational and unique so we were happy to arrange to have them visit us here in Salisbury. Since then, we have had so many different people come in to read, first with Prince and now with Thor. Thor has a very big fan base and comes all the way from Tewksbury to visit us.

Tell us more about Maple.

Maple is our newest therapy dog and lives right here in Salisbury. About a year ago, Maple’s owner, Pat, contacted me about having Maple visit our library. We decided Maple would come to story hour and we would call it ‘Mondays with Maple.’ Basically, Maple acts as a greeter, assistant and all around good sport while we read, craft and play. Maple sometimes even makes her own craft.

For folks who have not been to the library lately, what might surprise them about it?

If we don’t have a book you are looking for, we can almost always find it for you somewhere and have it sent to our library through interlibrary loan. It’s a beautiful thing.

What do you love the most about your job?

When kids come in looking for a new book in a series they love, and we have that book — it’s a great feeling to see them so happy about reading.

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What sort of children’s programs do you offer?

The children’s room offers weekly story hours, which consist of songs, stories, crafts and toys to play with. ‘2 and Under Story Time’ is for the younger set and ‘Mondays with Maple’ story time is made special because we all get to interact with Maple, one of our library therapy dogs. Twice a month we hold ‘Sit, Stay and Read’ with Thor, our other library therapy dog. Kids can sign up for a 15-minute time slot to visit and read with Thor.

That sounds really neat.

It is, and it is especially beneficial to kids who are shy about reading or are a reluctant reader. Kids are encouraged to attend even if they can’t read — parents might read the book with their child and Thor.

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When you are not working, what do you do for fun?

I spend a lot of time with my family at the beach, lakes and traveling — and waiting for the next Patriots season to start. I love to read, too.

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat

Anything we missed about you or your work that you would like to share?

We have a Family Cookbook Club, held once a month, recommended for ages 7 and older and an adult cooking partner. Each month we select a theme for the cookbook — March will be St. Patrick’s Day. The night of the event, people bring in their completed dishes and we dine and discuss what we have cooked. We are also looking forward to our annual St. Patrick’s Day performance by the Bracken School of Irish Dance, which should not be missed. If you are visiting the beach in the summer, stop and enjoy our beach story time on Tuesday mornings, too.

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Hampton Half Marathon and 5K. Photo by Joseph Lee Photography.

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Since it started, the annual Hampton Half Marathon and 5K have been a hit, and this year, the 13th, is no exception. The event, happening Sunday, March 8, and the 5K is already sold out (don’t worry, there’s another 5K the following weekend in Hampton; see box below).

This year, Arlon A. Chaffee, co-founder of Loco Sports, estimates over 1,100 runners will line up at the starting line.

“Turnout has never been an issue. Since we’ve introduced it, it has grown, and for the most part has sold out,” he said.

The Hampton Half Marathon and 5K begin at 10 a.m. with packet pickup beginning at 8 a.m. at the Ashworth by the Sea hotel. Chaffee advises runners to get there early to ensure that they have enough time to park, get their packet and prepare for the race. Parking is free and will be available at any of the state park beach lots near the hotel.

While the two races are completely separate from one another, they both begin and end at the Ashworth by the Sea hotel. The 5K course is made up out of part of the half marathon course, stretching along the scenic Ocean Boulevard, a section inland and a finish along the ocean, rounding back to the start.

“We find it’s a really good early-season test,” Chaffee said. “It’s a relatively flat course and if someone signs up for the half with all the best intentions and realizes halfway into the race that they can’t do it, they can always just run the 5K course.”

With the growing popularity of the event and concerns about runner safety, the decision a few years back to move it from February to March has proved to be instrumental in creating an overall better environment for runners.

“After one year with true winter weather, we decided it was in our best interest to push it back one month,” he said. “In general, we have had good weather since and the move has increased our chances of having better weather for it.”

As runners cross the finish line at Ashworth, they are invited to enjoy complimentary cups of minestrone and chicken noodle soup, craft beer from Smuttynose, yogurt from Stonyfield and granola bars from CLIF Bar.

There is also a charity component that goes along with the race, where racers can choose a charity of their choice or Loco Sports’ current cause, Girls on the Run NH, as well as a canned food drive where racers and spectators alike can bring goods.

“We direct people to Girls on the Run and other civic and civil groups,” he said. “They have supported us since our first race in 2007, with water stops and things along those lines. If you’re looking to run for a charity, that’s the one we recommend.”

The Hampton Rotary club manages the canned food drive and disperses the items to five local pantries. Loco Sports also provides some financial support following the race to further give back to pantries.

As spring nears closer, Loco Sports has plenty more races for all levels of runners: the Great Bay Half and 5K in Newmarket in April, the Margarita Half and 5K in Portsmouth in May and both the Smuttynose Will Run for Beer 5K in Hampton and the What Moves You 5K in Exeter in June.

— Chad Ripley Hampton Half Marathon & 5k Where: Ashworth by the Sea Hotel, 295 Ocean Blvd., Hampton When: Sunday, March 8, 8 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Cost: $79 (only half still available) More info: hamptonhalf.com, or locorunning.com for more upcoming races Clover Run 5K Saint Patrick Academy, in partnership with Smuttynose Brewery, will be hosting the seventh annual Clover Run 5K on Saturday, March 14, at 10:30 a.m., at Smuttynose in Hampton. This will be a family-friendly and canine-friendly event with lots to offer participants of all ages. The event will include a 5K road race, a kids fun run, beer, food and lots more! Run in your best St. Patrick’s day attire and win a prize! The cost is $25 for adults and $20 for kids under 18. Register at lightboxreg.com.

PEOPLE AND PLACES

Have a ball

Night out supports Annie’s Angels

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ELIGIBILITY TO JOIN NEARBY WATERS EDGE YACHT CLUB Heavenly Ball by annie’s Angels at Ashworth by the Sea. Courtesy photo.

Step out for a glamorous evening and help local families at Annie’s Angels 13th annual Heavenly Ball, happening on Saturday, March 14, at 5:30 p.m. at the Ashworth by the Sea in Hampton.

The evening begins with a cocktail hour and silent auction, followed by a few speeches and an all-you-can eat dinner buffet, featuring vegetarian and non-vegetarian options. After dinner is a dance party with music by Johnny B & Laurie the Party Time DJ’s. The attire is “dress to impress,” not formal.

“Heavenly Ball is our biggest fundraiser of the year,” said Bill DaGiau, co-founder of Annie’s Angels. “This year our goal is to raise $110,000 to help local families.”

Annie’s Angels was founded by DaGiau and his wife in memory of his late mother, who died in 2002 after a long battle with breast cancer. Since 2007 the charity has raised over $3 million for families around the area facing financial concerns due to life-threatening disease, illness or disability.

Dinner and the silent auction are included in the price of admission for $75. DaGiau explained that the ball seemed like a fun way to raise money when they first thought of the idea 13 years ago.

“The thing that got the ball off the ground is the fact that we needed to raise money to help these families pay for groceries, health bills, stuff along those lines,” he said. “The best thing about [Annie’s] is that corporate headquarters is a room over the garage at our house, keeping expenses low. That way all the money we raise through our programs is given to families.”

Families can apply for grants from Annie’s to cover expenses ranging from medical bills for groceries and household bills. Annie’s also has a program called “Got Wood” that provides wood for families in the winter, and “Chris’ Pets for Vets” that connect veterans with service animals. In the five years of doing such, they have connected over 500 animals with veterans across the area.

“My favorite thing about it is that we are able to help our neighbors,” DaGiau said. “We’ve been doing it for 13 years and in those years we have never once had to turn anyone away who needed our help. We always have found a way to help.”

DaGiau also said he believes that his mother is still watching over them and everything they do, hopefully with a big smile on her face.

“She was always volunteering, always that mom at any event. I hope she’s proud that we are able to help so many different people,” he said.

Annie’s Angels has more events in the coming months, like the 24th annual Ride by the Sea 5k on May 30, a July 25 Beach Party and a Sept. 12 motorcycle rally.

— Chad Ripley

40 Years of Pleasure

13th Annual Heavenly Ball by Annie’s Angels When: Saturday, March 14, 5:30 p.m.

Where: Ashworth by the Sea in Hampton Cost: $75 Contact: Bill DaGiau, bill@anniesangels.org or call 603-686-4224

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 15

CAR TALK

Going to the PROM Dear Car Talk: How does a digital odometer keep its reading when you disconnect the battery?

No, I don’t work for a used car dealer.

— Steve

By Ray Magliozzi

It uses something called a PROM, Steve. And it’s not the thing that you rented a tuxedo for in high school.

A PROM is a type of computer chip.

The letters stand for Programmable Read-Only Memory. There’s a PROM in the odometer itself, which is constantly updated with the new odometer reading.

Each time a new reading is recorded, it permanently replaces the old reading.

And it doesn’t require a battery. It stores whatever information was last written on it indefinitely. Think of it like an etching.

Except not the kind you tried to invite your prom date up to your room to see.

The odometer’s PROM cannot be tinkered with. At least not by us mere mortals.

When someone comes into our shop with a bad speedometer head, we can’t simply order a new one and install it and set the odometer’s mileage. We have to

send it to an authorized facility, where they transfer the old mileage reading to the new odometer and send it back to us.

We have neither the equipment nor the authorization to set a PROM reading in an odometer. Otherwise, like you, Steve, we’d go into the used car business.

Dear Car Talk: My 2010 Chevy Impala keeps telling me that I don’t have a left-rear tire! But I can see it right there on the car. And it’s even correctly inflated to 32 psi.

It happened soon after I took the car to the tire guy to get my winter tires put on. Two days later the tire sensor says “POOF,” my left-rear tire is not even recognized. Gone.

I take it back to the tire guy and the sensor light goes off as we drive into tire guys’ parking lot.

The tire sensor light is playing games and goes off and on when the weather fluctuates. Can I take this car on a road trip later this month, or is it not safe?

Should I use the Car Talk black tape solution? — Mindy

My brother used to be confused by the Check Engine light. He’d check the

engine, see it was still there, shrug, and get back in the car.

I think you’ve got a bad tire pressure sensor, Mindy. There’s a tire pressure sensor in each tire. And each one communicates wirelessly with the car’s computer.

They originally tried wiring them, but after the test drivers wrapped about 50,000 feet of wire around each axle, they gave up on that approach.

Anyway, if your sensor is broken, or if it’s incompatible with your car, and the car’s computer cannot connect to it, it’ll trigger a warning that tells you it’s not recognized.

It’s possible that your tire guy damaged the sensor when he swapped out your tires and didn’t know it. Or it’s possible that he knew he broke it and replaced it with an aftermarket sensor that doesn’t work well with your car. Or it’s possible that the sensor’s time was just up, or that its battery is dead after 10 years, and the visit to the tire store was just a coincidence.

In any case, a trip back to the tire store is in order. Explain that within two days of your visit, the warning light came on and is now coming on intermittently. The two days gives him

plausible deniability. But if he’s a good guy, and he thinks it’s likely he damaged the sensor, he’ll replace it. If he’s a good guy and he doesn’t think he damaged it, he may at least replace it without charging you for labor. If he’s not a good guy, he’ll still replace it, he’ll just charge you for it. It’ll cost you between $50 and $100.

But should get it replaced. And ask him to use the original equipment (OEM) General Motors sensor for your Impala. The OEM sensors tend to pair up most easily and work most reliably, in our experience.

While we sometimes recommend the “black tape solution” (putting a piece of electrical tape over an offending warning light) for problems with no safety consequence, this is not one of those, Mindy.

Even though you’ve confirmed not only the presence of your rear tire, but it’s proper inflation pressure, that could change on a road trip. And that’s exactly the purpose of the tire pressure monitoring system; to let you know if you lose air and are in danger of a blowout. So get it fixed and enjoy your trip.

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FOOD

AT STALK Chefs Nicole Nocella and John Daniels are no strangers to the Seacoast restaurant community — they first met while working together at Martingale Wharf in Portsmouth, later crossing paths again at Jumpin’ Jay’s Fish Cafe.

Now, the two friends have gone into business together to combine visions of owning and operating their own establishment. Stalk (286 Central Ave., Dover, 343-2600, stalkrestaurant.com) is a new farm-to-table eatery of modern American food with culinary influence from around the world. Located in the former space of a Dos Amigos Burritos, Stalk has a rustic and casual feel, with a concrete countertop, antique mirrors, black iron shelving units, and lots of wood — the bar top was once part of the ticket counter for the city’s train station, according to Daniels. The menu changes all the time but always features meat, seafood and vegetarian options as appetizers and main courses, plus a full-service bar of specialty cocktails. Sunday brunch was also recently introduced, from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. each week. Daniels, who has experience as a pastry chef, even implements his own unique dessert options. Stalk’s name pays homage to its philosophy of working with local ingredients “from the ground up,” according to Nocella, like a stalk grows from seeds in the ground. She and Daniels recently spoke with the Scene about some of their personal favorite dishes and some must-try options for when you visit.

How long has Stalk been around?

Nocella: About five to six weeks.

What makes Stalk unique?

Nocella: We make everything here from scratch, using ingredients from local farms.

Nothing comes out of a can or comes in a frozen bag, and I think that really shows when the food arrives on your plate. We make all of our sauces in house and do our own housemade ricotta cheese. John is our pastry chef, so he makes all of our desserts, too.

What is your personal favorite dish?

Nocella: For me, I think it would be the chicken roulade. We get whole chickens and I break them down and de-skin them com-

pletely. We also braise the chicken thighs ourselves.

Daniels: I really like our braised short rib.

It’s an Asian-style short rib with a five spice glaze and kimchi fried rice on the side. I also love our desserts. We’ve done a lemon tart with pineapple marmalade that people really like, and we also have a Mexican chocolate torte with a horchata crèma glaze.

What is a dish that everyone should try?

Nocella: I would say the house-charred Brussels sprouts. They come with a coconut vinegar, pickled bird eye chilis, carrots and radishes, and then we do a kaffir lime aioli, fresh mint and basil. We have lamb lollipops here too, which is something

A shot of the bar.

SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 18

House gnudi with steamed mussels, spaghetti squash, grana padano brodo, crispy leeks and grilled lemon. Photos by Suzana Mihajlica.

you don’t really see around too much. We make a tremendous amount of those. They go over German potato salad with smoked rosemary and buttered walnut.

What is an essential skill to running a restaurant?

Nocella: Just being able to give it our all and constantly challenging ourselves as chefs to push the envelope. It’s important for us to put our name out there and that people remember us for our food when they come in.

What is your favorite thing about being on the Seacoast?

Nocella: I live just over the border from

Dover in Somersworth and the food community here on the Seacoast is unreal. It’s where I’ve connected most with other chefs in the area. We all try to help out and support each other. I think the food prevails unbelievably on the Seacoast because of the great chefs we have here.

Daniels: I live about four minutes away from the restaurant, right in Dover. The Seacoast in general is great because I love the proximity of everything. You can go to the ocean and the mountains, and you’re not that far from Boston or Portland either. I actually moved away for a little bit but I came back because I loved it so much here.

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FOOD

TRY THIS AT HOME Bruschetta My thought behind this week’s recipe is that if you can’t make spring arrive any sooner, you can ignore winter with some tasty snacks.

This bruschetta recipe leans toward a bit of sweetness. By no means is it actually sweet, but it also isn’t fully savory either. Between caramelizing the onions and incorporating peaches, you have the start of a bruschetta that has elements of sweetness. However, I’ve tempered that sweetness with two ingredients: cinnamon and cider vinegar.

When you think about cinnamon, you may tend to think of sweet things: cinnamon and sugar toast, snickerdoodle cookies, cinnamon rolls. That thinking is correct, but cinnamon also adds a bit of spice, which can help minimize sweetness. Cider vinegar is an acidic component that will reduce the presence of sugar.

All combined you have a wonderful topping for crostini, crackers, or whatever vehicle you choose. Personally, I

like to add a layer of goat cheese. It adds a bit more bite to the flavor profile, as well as a creamy textural element.

When shopping for this recipe, I’d encourage you to buy peaches that are slightly underripe. As they spend some time sautéing, they become softer. In the final product you want the peaches to be the fruit version of al dente — tender but still with a little bite. If you buy fully ripe peaches, your final product will be mushy, and that’s a less desirable result.

Even if we can’t make winter magically disappear, we can think about (and make) fruity, spring-like snacks.

Michele Pesula Kuegler has been thinking about food her entire life. Since 2007, the New Hampshire resident has been sharing these food thoughts and recipes at her blog, Think Tasty. Please visit thinktasty.com to find more of her recipes.

Peach & Caramelized Onion Bruschetta. Photo by Michele Pesula Kuegler.

Peach & Caramelized Onion Bruschetta Serves 6 as an appetizer 1/2 tablespoon butter or olive oil 1 cup diced sweet onion 2 cups diced peach (about 2 peaches) 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar 2 tablespoons water 1 tablespoon brown sugar 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Sauté for 10 minutes, stirring frequently.

Add peaches, and sauté for 2 more minutes.

Add apple cider vinegar, water, and brown sugar, stirring to combine.

Increase heat to medium.

Continue to stir regularly for approximately 2 minutes until all the liquid has been absorbed.

Preheat frying pan over medium heat.

Remove from heat, and sprinkle with cinnaAdd butter or oil and onion; reduce heat to mon, stir well. low.

Serve with crostini and goat cheese.

DRINK

Organic and unfiltered The old-fashioned hot new thing in wine This week, I’m having a little fun with some very serious wine!

Freakshow Cabernet Sauvignon (originally priced at $16.49 at the New Hampshire Liquor & Wine Outlets and on sale for $13.95), and Petite Petit Sirah (originally priced at $13.99 and on sale for $11.95) present fantastic opportunities to have fun with serious wines at very attractive prices. These wines come from the Michael David Winery in Lodi, California, a city and a wine region east of San Francisco and south of Sacramento, California. Lodi was recently recognized

by Wine Enthusiast as a premier wine producing area, and honored Adam Mettler, of Michael David Winery, as winemaker of the year in 2018, no small accolade, as their “Best Of” categories are worldwide. According to the city’s website, Lodi is home to over 100 varietals of grapes, more than anywhere else in North America. In her article for Retail & Food Best Practices about the winery, Staci Davidson writes, “Lodi is known for producing more wine grapes than any other California region. The city has 85 wineries that produce approximately 450 labels, and it has been recognized as the old vine Zinfandel capital of the world.”

According to the Michael David Winery website, Michael and David Phillips are brothers who are the fifth generation of farmers in the Lodi region. Settling in the 1850s, their family has been involved in agriculture, growing fruits and vegetables for 150 years. A hundred years ago they began to grow grapes, with more than 800 acres now in cultivation.

Wine making was started as a hobby by Michael Phillips, enjoyed at the end of a day of farming, according to the website. In 1984 Michael was bonded and started selling wine. In 2000 the brothers offered their first vintage of 7 Deadly Zins. In 2002 they sold 12,000 cases, and last year they sold 350,000 cases; so successful that in 2017 it was sold to The Wine Group. Freakshow followed 7 Deadly Zins in 2009 with a production of 6,000 cases and has turned into a 250,000-case brand today.

In 2007, while Kevin Phillips, Michael’s son, was sitting on a local wine commission, standards for sustainable and responsible farming were established for the area, known as the Lodi Rules. The program involved more than 100 sustainability practices, grower-created and peer-reviewed, and called for passing all the tests established by the

SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 20

Courtesy photos.

industry at large. Phillips liked the way the program was set up, so he applied it to all of the Michael David Winery vineyards so they could become certified to this standard.

Now, enough of all this background information on this incredible company and on with our wines!

Freakshow Cabernet Sauvignon has 100 freaks on the label, and if you go on their website, there is an interactive face filter app wherein you can become your favorite freak and possibly win a spot on the label.

On the website Jeff Farthing, the winemaker, explains that the grapes are among the last to be harvested and through an extended maceration of the grapes on their skins for a month, a full, rich extraction of great col-

or and tannins are produced. The nose is of vanilla, cherry, cassis, black raspberries. To the tongue the taste is the same, with a long, smooth finish. Enjoy with a filet mignon with a bearnaise sauce.

Petite Petit has “fun animal characters” on its label. The two elephants in the center remind winemaker Derek DeVries of the two brothers, Michael and David. “Big and robust,” he calls them. The blend is 85 percent petite sirah and 15 percent petit verdot.

The petite sirah is robust, with tannins and structure, softened by the blending of the petit verdot, which adds floral notes of lavender and violets. Its dark color and full fruit is derived from the petite sirah. It is aged for 12 months in French oak. This wine made Wine Enthusiast “Wine of the Year” in 2015!

It should be enjoyed with beef, perhaps a nice prime rib roast!

So, go online at michaeldavidwinery.com.

Try the app; have a little fun and create your favorite freak. But, much more importantly, pick up these wines, and enjoy them with friends and family over a great dinner.

Fred Matuszewski is a local architect and a foodie and wine geek, interested in the cultivation of the multiple strains and varieties of grapes and the industry of wine production and sales. Chief among his travels is an annual trip to the wine producing areas of California.

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POP CULTURE

Living tales

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US K C E T! H C OU

Now in its fourth year, the New Hampshire Theatre Project’s annual Storytelling Festival, previously a weekend-long event, will span three weekends this year, with storytelling performances and workshops on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays from March 6 through March 22 in Portsmouth, celebrating traditional tales, legends and myths of Native American and Celtic origins as well as modern personal narratives.

“For the last three years we’ve had everything jam-packed into three days,” New Hampshire Theatre Project artistic director Catherine Stewart said. “We chose to extend it because there was a lot of interest in the festival, both from storytellers who want to share the rich tradition of storytelling in New Hampshire and the Northeast, and from community members who want to hear and interact with storytelling.”

This year’s featured storyteller is Diane Edgecomb, a Boston-based professional storyteller with 30 years of experience.

She describes her storytelling style as “embodied” or “theatrical” storytelling.

“I am totally transformed into the characters,” Edgecomb said. “I live them. I embody them. I evoke the events so that [the story] feels very much alive.”

Edgecomb will be joined by six other storytellers — Anne Jennison, Sarah Bauhan, Regina Delaney, Kent Allyn, Pat Spalding and Genevieve Aichele — putting on performances and leading workshops.

Each weekend of the festival will be centered around a different theme: earth, nature and springtime the first weekend, March 6 through March 8; Celtic storytelling the second weekend, March 13 through March 15; and the New Hamp-

shire Theatre Project’s season theme “Can one person make a difference?” the third and final weekend, March 20 through March 22.

In addition to the one-day workshops focusing on select storytelling topics, Edgecomb will teach a workshop series, “The Golden Thread: Finding Meaning in Traditional Tales,” every Friday, which is open to both experienced and novice storytellers. The series will explore all facets of storytelling, including voice, movement, characterization and narration techniques as well as how to adapt ancient stories for a contemporary audience. “The Golden Thread” participants will have the opportunity to perform in the Storytellers Showcase on the final day of the festival.

“Teaching is a wonderful thing. I love to pass on the art of storytelling and see a person open up their expressive abilities and imagination,” Edgecomb said, adding that the skills taught in the workshop series can also be applied to “personal storytelling, public speaking and even regular conversation” and help participants to “communicate so much better.”

Stewart said the Storytelling Festival is an important part of the New Hampshire Theatre Project’s yearly programming as it provides a break between the company’s highly produced mainstage shows and serves as a reminder that storytelling is “the core work” of theater.

“This is an opportunity for us to put away the costumes and the props and all the showy stuff that we use in theater and really dig into the art form, which starts with knowing how to tell a good story,” she said.

— Angie Sykeny

New Hampshire Theatre Project’s 4th annual Storytelling Festival Where: 959 Islington St., Portsmouth When: Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays from March 6 through March 22 Cost: Saturday performances are $25; Sunday performances are $20; standalone workshops are $60 and include a ticket to one performance; and “The Golden Thread” workshop series is $190 and includes tickets to three performances Visit: nhtheatreproject.org

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Performances • “In the Groves” with Diane Edgecomb – Saturday, March 7, 8 p.m.

• “Native American Tales” with Anne Jennison – Sunday, March 8, 2 p.m.

• “An Irish Rhapsody” with Diane Edgecomb – Saturday, March 14, 8 p.m.

• “Sarah Bauhan in Concert” with Kent Allyn – Sunday, March 15, 2 p.m.

• “A Thousand Doorways” with Diane Edgecomb – Saturday, March 21, 8 p.m.

• “Storytellers Showcase” hosted by Pat Spalding – Sunday, March 22, 2 p.m.

Workshops • “The Golden Thread: Finding Meaning in Traditional Tales” with Diane Edgecomb – Fridays, March 6, March 13 and March 20, 6:30 to 9 p.m.

• “Native American Storytelling” with Anne Jennison – Sunday, March 7, 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.

• “Irish Music & Storytelling” with Regina Delaney – Saturday, March 14, 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.

• “Mythologizing Oral History & Personal Stories” with Genevieve Aichele – Saturday, March 21, 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.

POP CULTURE BOOKS

Dear Edward, by Ann Napolitano (Dial Press, 336 pages) Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano will knock your socks off. It’s the story of a young boy, Eddie Alder, who travels with his parents and brother by commercial plane from New York to their new home in California. The plane crashes in Colorado and little Eddie is the sole survivor. He is alive but badly broken both physically and emotionally.

Eddie has lost his parents, his brother, and his future. He becomes the “boy who lived.” His mother’s only sibling, a sister, is asked how to refer to him in press releases while he is still in the hospital — is it Eddie or Edward? They decide on Edward.

And thus out of the crash’s fires emerges Edward reborn.

Edward goes to live with his aunt and uncle. The couple had long been trying for a child and had been unable to have a baby.

This sets up such an incredible dynamic.

The mythical boy who lived, a woman who longed for a child and who finally gets a child that doesn’t want to be hers, and a boy who at the tender age of 11 must create an entirely new identity for himself while learning how to navigate the grief of being an orphan in a new family.

This book is not an action thriller; instead it is a brain thriller — the underlying psychological drama is where it’s at. There are passages in this book that will crush your heart — absolutely crush it — like when he wears his older brother’s coat even though it is too large but because it reminds him of being with his brother.

Or not being able to sleep in the room his aunt and uncle had set aside and decorated for the baby that never came.

Dear Edward is about rising from the ashes. It’s about regaining strength when you thought you had none left and it’s about finding your way in a world that is unfamiliar and terrifying. It does all this with phenomenal storytelling and literary grace.

As it is in all tragedies, others’ lives and stories are also involved, not just the ones who make it into the news but those of whom you never hear, the other travelers who were also on the plane along with the loved ones on the ground who were waiting for them to return.

Dear Edward also covers the stories of select passengers who were on the plane that day. A young woman who finds out she is pregnant and who is traveling to California to marry her boyfriend who doesn’t know. A mysterious woman who somehow has wisdom of the ages and who appears to have lived sever-

Something for Every Season al lifetimes. A wounded member of the military who is trying to find balance and peace in his life. All people in the middle of figuring out who they are and how they fit into the world.

Just like what Edward must now do.

When I first started this book, I had set aside an hour to read. The first time I looked up after starting it, four hours had passed. Yes, it’s that engrossing and thought-provoking. It’s my favorite kind of book, the one where you think about it on and off long after you’ve turned the last page.

It’s impossible to read this book without asking yourself, would I have had the strength of that little boy to keep getting up each morning? Would I have the inner resilience of the aunt who is also so clearly injured — she has lost her sister, lost her babies by miscarriage, and, by providence, has now gained a wounded son, the child she had always wanted, just not this way.

Dear Edward is stellar storytelling.

Other writers should study how this book is written and constructed; it’s that impressive. The author artfully weaves themes and stories so tightly that the result is nothing short of a work of art.

I can be a tough reviewer. I typically take points off for things like not maintaining a consistent pace, for dialogue that is stilted, and for backstories that bog down the plot’s progress. You’ll not see me deduct a point on any of those criteria for this book. Napolitano’s Dear Edward is a masterpiece, innovative and heartwarming. A true story for the ages.

You will not be sorry if you pick this one up.

A+ — Wendy E. N. Thomas

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NITE

Put on your dancin’ shoes

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(603) 474-4229 • smokyqd.com facebook.com/smokyquartzdistillery Located on Route 1 in Seabrook, NH. We are an artisan ‘grain to glass’ craft distillery using only the highest quality ingredients to distill truly exceptional “Small Batch” spirits.

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 24

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Dance the night away at the Key Collective’s first annual Dance Party, featuring Ben Baldwin and the Big Note Band playing jazz, blues and swing music, plus appetizers and a cash bar.

The fundraiser is happening Saturday, March 7, from 7 to 10 p.m. at the Abenaqui Country Club in Rye Beach.

“One of our board members is a huge fan of Ben Baldwin and the Big Note Band. She has been following them for a long time and they were willing to discount their fee to benefit our organization,” said Kristyn LaFleur, founder and executive director of the Key Collective.

The band’s Facebook page touts it as a “dance band with style and substance with a repertoire that can be as elegant as Johnny Mercer, as smooth as Sam Cooke & as raucous as the Kinks.” For a taste of their music, check out hlfhlt.wixsite.com/ benbaldwindanceparty.

One hundred percent of ticket sales from the event will directly benefit the KEY Collective and its #areuin? card program.

“The financial contributions that we receive from this event directly impact the growth and sustainability of the program and the positive impact it has on our region’s youth,” LaFleur said.

The nonprofit was founded in 2017 as a result of a grant awarded by Exeter Hospital.

“The KEY Collective envisions every child without the financial means having the same out-of-school opportunities that are available to their peers, available to them, without any social stigma attached,” LaFleur said.

The grant from Exeter Hospital was part of its Suicide Prevention Grant Initiative, which also established the #areuin? card program that gives Seacoast-area youth the opportunity to engage in quality out-ofschool programming.

“This program offers qualified students, via free and reduced lunch eligibility or through a school validator referral, an opportunity to register for free or discounted memberships and programs by simply showing their membership card to partner organizations rather than having to ask for financial assistance or fill out additional income/financial paperwork each and every time they are interested in a program,” said LaFleur.

During the first year of the program, which began in the Exeter school district, 30 percent of eligible students signed up for a membership card. Of that percentage, 40 percent of the students were enrolled in one or more programs. Fifty-two percent were enrolled in one or more programs in the second year, where the same amount of students signed up. In total, just over 500 students were reached in Exeter. The program is in its third year in Exeter and its first year in the Hampton school district. It will launch in the Portsmouth school district at the beginning of the next school year.

“The objective is to grow the number of out-of-school opportunities within existing partner school districts, as well as expand the list of partner school districts statewide,” LaFleur said. In October 2017 the program was nationally recognized by the Aspen Institute as one of seven emerging grassroots programs in youth sports at the Let’s Play Summit in Washington, D.C. The dance party will be at the Abenaqui Country Club at 731 Central Road in Rye Beach, from 7 to 10 p.m. on Saturday, March 7. Light appetizers will be served, and a cash bar will be available. Tickets are $40 and can be purchased online at eventbrite.com. For more information on the KEY Collective and the #areuin? card program, visit areuincard.org.

— Danielle Roberts

NITE

Vinyl in bloom

Percy Hill’s ’90s gem gets 12-inch treatment If ever a work of music deserved to be pressed into vinyl, it’s Color in Bloom by Percy Hill. The product of a markedly reinvented band in 1998, it stands out as one of the most sophisticated, elegant and tuneful records to come from a vibrant time in Seacoast music.

The 56-minute masterpiece earned glowing comparisons to Steely Dan, Sting and Pat Metheny, as it gained fans across the country, and won Percy Hill. Courtesy photo. the inaugural Jammy in 2000 for Best Studio Album. For context, Phish The two also spent plenty of time in the won it the second year, for Farmhouse. practice room and at each other’s shows.

The group had formed as a six-piece at It was a matter of time until they were in a the start of the ’90s. Focused on loose but band together. “Nate would see me play with literate improvisation, they made three LPs. Vitamin C and hear the songs I was writing,” As the decade neared a close, only Joe Far- Katz said. rell and Nate Wilson remained as original Wilson, too, was moving in a similar members. They recruited UNH pals John direction.

Leccese and Aaron Katz. The latter brought “It just seemed like a perfect fit,” Katz said. a sheath of songs he’d contribute to a new The decision to release Color in Bloom on album. vinyl was a fan-driven one, according to Katz.

Color in Bloom would spur years of tour“A lot of it started from getting messaging that nearly broke the band. Percussionist es through Facebook Direct,” he said. “That Yahuba Garcia joined a few years later, help- was the impetus that got us to start thinking ing them make one more record, 2005’s and talking about it. Along with that, John, After All. A long hiatus followed; they re- our bass player, is a huge vinyl fan. He wantformed in 2016 and now play a dozen or ed to do that from the minute we got back more shows a year. together in 2016. So it was really just getting On Friday, March 13, they’re set to re- all of the pieces and the right mastering engirelease Color in Bloom as a vinyl double neer together.” album, and celebrate it with a pair of shows The band did a pair of shows to end 2019, — one in Burlington, Vermont, another at including one at Hill Country Barbecue in Stone Church in Newmarket. Even better, New York City to kick off a Phish afterparty they’re making new music. The trancey, during their New Year’s Eve run at Madison electronica-infused “Great White Shark” Square Garden. came out last spring, and Katz said in a “It’s a great scene,” Katz said of the club. recent phone interview that Percy Hill is “It sort of reminds me of the old Wetlands, hard at work on a new long-player. where Blues Traveler, Dave Matthews, moe.

“We probably have three albums’ worth and all of those bands kind of took off in of material,” he said, noting they’re work- New York. It’s a small little room, but it defing with producer Sean McLaughlin at 37’ initely has the right vibe.”

Productions in Rockland, Mass. “It’s really One big show lies ahead for Percy Hill just carving out the time. … We’re always — they’re booked to play at Strangefolk’s in motion, moving forward to some degree.” annual Garden of Eden Festival in Vermont At the time he joined Percy Hill, Katz on Aug. 8, Katz said. was in a funk band called Vitamin C and “We look forward to keeping our live gaining a reputation for his smart lyrics. show going,” he said. “We are really excited He, Wilson and Leccese were all attending to see everybody and connect again.”

UNH’s music school. Wilson had a turn— Michael Witthaus table — uncommon in college dorms at a time when most students were diving into Percy Hill - Color in Bloom vinyl Napster and MP3s. re-release “We loved party grooves, good feelings, When: Saturday, March 14, 9 p.m. great changes and all of the instrumentation.

Where: Stone Church, 5 Granite St., … We were really into that,” Katz said. “Nate Newmarket and I would geek out to Steely Dan a lot …

Tickets: $15 at stonechurchrocks.com Aja, Katy Lied, all of those early albums.”

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 25

BEACH BUM FUN JONESIN’ CROSSWORDS BY MATT JONES

“Decade in Review, Part 4” — 2016 & 2017 Across 1 Compensation in a lawsuit 8 “Don’t mind ___ do!”

11 Media device manufactured for the last time by Funai Electric in 2016

14 Check out 15 Exclamation from Poirot 17 Margaret Atwood’s 2016 retelling of Shakespeare’s “The Tempest” 18 It may be drafted for impeachment

19 Brute in a storybook 20 They may be dire 21 ___ out (back down from a daunting task) 24 ‘16 and ‘17, e.g.

26 Signature of Pooh’s tree-dwelling friend 27 Being employed 29 Sharp ___ tack 31 “Major” or “Minor” constellation 35 Slide into your ___ 36 2016 event featuring a shirtless Tongan, green pool water, and Ryan Lochte shenanigans 40 Hit the buffet 41 Jones who ran from a big boulder 42 +, on a battery 43 TV host who misannounced the

2/20

winner of Miss Universe in 2017 45 Sault ___ Marie, Canada 46 Garr of “Young Frankenstein” 47 Shakespearean laments 48 Clean vigorously 50 Journalist Mary Louise Kelly’s employer 52 Prefix for dermis 55 MIT’s middle, in brief 56 Kick-ass 60 Chain to buy some stacks 62 Biblical king 63 Hit 2017 indie video game in the style of 1930s animation 67 Celebrated 68 Sees if one can 69 Network that aired a “Candy Crush” game show in 2017 70 Admin’s domain, for short 71 Sound setups Down 1 Homer’s exclamation 2 “Defending Liberty, Pursuing Justice” org.

3 Flavor enhancer initials 4 “___ Fables” 5 Actor Kinnear 6 The “E” in “EGBDF” 7 Passover feast 8 “___ shocked as you are”

9 Indiana’s second-largest city 10 Album opener 11 “I conquered,” to Caesar 12 Ancient Briton 13 Feels sorrow about 16 Broadband forerunner 21 Least narrow 22 Cell dweller 23 Good thing to pass 25 Ronan of “Little Women” 28 Lake that borders Ohio 30 Montenegrin, e.g.

32 Gets after 33 D.C. nine, for short 34 Affirm as true 37 Forming a chord, say 38 “Honeysuckle Rose” singer Anita 39 Hall of Famer Willie 44 Antarctic mountain ___ Massif 49 Coded message 51 Apples and pears, e.g.

53 Ancient Britons 54 “___ myself today ...” (NIN/Johnny Cash lyric) 56 “Be with you in just ___!”

57 Place for growth?

58 Yale students 59 Docs that use endoscopes 61 “The Andy Griffith Show” kid 64 Linguistics suffix 65 “From ___ Zinc” (multivitamin slogan) 66 Two, to Juan © 2020 Matt Jones

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 26

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BEACH BUM FUN HOROSCOPES All quotes are from Surpassing Certainty: What My Twenties Taught Me, by Janet Mock, born March 10, 1983.

Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) That was the start of my natural-hair journey. Hair is political and personal. The way we wear our hair is a statement we make about ourselves. I’m not one of those people who have deep opinions about how other women style their hair, because it’s their hair. Sometimes the statement is ‘I have other things to do right now.’

Aries (March 21 – April 19) No one in my family had left Hawaii or gone to college or achieved as much as I had, but they were proud of me. … My journey was not an escape from them in order to find myself. I was leaving the nest — finally — to discover more of myself.

There’s more to discover.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20) … though I could be on my own, I was not alone. I had people, people who may not have had much, but still pulled through to show up for me when I didn’t even know I needed them. This week’s soundtrack brought to you by Barbra Streisand.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20) My commute felt like it belonged to a woman with children my age. It’s not the job, it’s the commute.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22) … I knew there was more than this, more than the pile of work that never seemed to reduce, more than the commutes and the silence at home. Your “more” is calling.

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) The glow of my promotion faded when I realized that I had missed another opportunity to negotiate a higher salary for myself. Oh, snap.

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) … I believed wholeheartedly and was deeply invested in my fashion editor dreams, further encouraged

by Vanessa Williams’s star turn as Wilhelmina Slater, the Botoxed editor in chief everyone loved to hate on Ugly Betty. You have your choice of role models.

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) I was about to enter my sophomore year. I hadn’t yet declared a major but was intent on studying law because of my pedantic nature and my obsession with Ally McBeal. Pursue what interests you.

Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) AOL Instant Messenger (AIM) became our base of communications…. We gathered in group chats, gossiped, planned what we were wearing, relayed grievances and giddiness, and coordinated our daily schedules. Nothing was more important to me than my AIM status, which I changed at least three times a day — sometimes using quotes, other times stating my location and shouting out friends I was having a ball with. Your status is not the most important thing.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) I began to see disclosure not so much as an obligation but as a gift. My story was mine, and I felt a person had to earn the privilege of hearing it. You might enjoy one of the upcoming storytelling festivals in the area.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) My knowledge of music was limited to whatever my father had on his cassette player in the early ’90s or the countdown on MTV’s Total Request Live, which dominated my teen years in the early ’00s. Your knowledge of music may be about to expand.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) But you can’t escape your truth. It follows you. No matter how far you travel, how good you feel with it at a distance, it lingers and sticks to you. Remember to shower after you work out.

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 27

BEACH BUM FUN ROCKANDROLLCROSSWORDS.com

IT PUZZLED ME TO MY SOUL Across

1. Angus Young ‘TNT’ band 5. Sing with maximum emotion, slang 9. “Her hair reminds me of a warm safe place where __ __ child I’d hide, (2,1) 12. To not make it 13. Hard partiers might damage these organs on tour 15. Van Morrison “Half a mile from the county fair and the rain came pourin’

down” song (3,2,6,2) 17. Your band is considered this, on the bill 18. Breeders debut album about a pea container?

19. Jam band w/period at end inspired by The Three Stooges?

20. Clarinet is a single-__ instrument 22. Pink Floyd “I’ve got a little black book with my poems in” song (6,4)

28. Flower Jeff Buckley would pick w/ wine 30. ‘Listen To Your Love’ band 31. Onyx hit about stage dive gone wrong?

32. Van Morrison “__ __ dream that I had in the night” (4,1) 33. ‘99 Megadeth album they took a chance on?

35. Rapper/actor Mos __ 36. Toby Keith ‘___ Bar’ (1,4,4) 40. UK chillout pioneers 43. Marcos Hernandez ‘__ __ Known’ (2,2) 44. Carly Simon wears an apricot one around her neck, perhaps 48. RTZ/Boston’s singer Brad 50. Billy that danced with himself 52. Grateful Dead ‘__ Magnolia’ 53. Van Morrison ‘___ See A River’ (5,4,1) 56. What tribute singer will do with original artist’s moves 57. Van Morrison ‘__ Me Through’

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58. Popular UK mag (abbr) 60. Van Morrison ‘__ To Go Where The Love Is’ 61. Krisiun album about the killing of a prominent person?

66. Passenger ‘12 smash (3,3,2) 67. Sting might tell a summoner one 68. J Geils 80s hit for the altar? (1,2) 69. ‘Wolf Like Me’ __ __ The Radio (2,2) 70. Jerry Reed ‘__ Moses’

25. Butterfly Boucher ‘Another White __’ 26. Legendary ‘Happy Birthday, TwentyOne!’ West 27. ‘Unbelievable’ dance-rocking Brits 29. West coast state Journey is from, for short 34. Peter Criss band 37. ‘Scratch The Surface’ punks Sick __ __ All (2,2) 38. Hives hit album ‘Veni __ Vicious’ 39. Norwegian lowlife black metal band?

40. Ravonettes sang an ‘__ To L.A.’ Down 1. ‘90 Tom Petty video ‘__ The Crowd’ 41. Vixen got on their motorcycle to ‘__ It Up’ (1,4,2) 2. “C’est la vie” say the old folks, it goes 42. Elton John hit he felt born lucky with?

45. David Lee Roth classic ‘Just __ __’ to show you never __ __” (3,3) 3. Deana Carter ‘__ I Shave My Legs For (1,6) 46. ‘I Wanna Be Sedated’ band This?’

47. Guitar neck feature 4. Short piece of video 5. Bob Marley song about learned 49. Rush’s 13th album for a magic show?

51. Beatle John experience?

6. A carpenter or fire one might march to 54. Montgomery Gentry will give you a ‘Hell __’ DMB concert 7. Statler Bros “But who am __ __ say?” 55. Tech N9NE ‘__ __ Playa’ (2,1) 59. Iconic ‘The Wallflower’ female soul (1,2) singer James 8. Canadian ‘Steal My Sunshine’ band 61. R&B singer/Fresh Prince Of Bel Air 9. Elle King ‘Ex’s __ __’ (3,3) 10. Dan Fogelberg ‘__ __ Lang Syne’ star Tatyana 62. Type of list on stage (4,3) 63. Eric Johnson song for Stevie Ray 11. Kind of post-show pint Vaughan 14. ‘The Golden Hum’ band __ Zero 64. Aerosmith “Crazy, baby __ __ crazy” 16. Devo ‘__ O’ Luv’ (1,2) 17. Folky Guthrie 21. ‘03 Pete Yorn album ‘__ __ Forgot’ 65. Van Morrison “Here __ __ standing in your sad arrest” (1,2) © (3,1) 2020 Todd Santos 23. Your fav band never causes this 24. Beyonce ‘Single Ladies (Put A Ring __ __)’ (2,2)

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SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 28

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NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

The continuing crisis

A rider on the New York City subway employed a novel way of protecting his personal space on Feb. 7, Fox News reported. The seated passenger removed a bottle of ketchup from his bag and squirted a squiggly perimeter on the floor around his seat, apparently hoping to keep fellow straphangers away. Twitter erupted with funny comments after one user posted a photo: “Gotta protect yourself from the mustard demons they can’t cross the barrier” and “What brand of ketchup though?” New York City Transit got a taste of the problem and promised to clean it up right away.

The litigious society

Lacie the Norwegian Forest cat is at the center of a heated two-year dispute in Brewerton, New York, that has now gone to state Supreme Court. Original owner Carol Money accuses adoptive owner Danette Romano of refusing to let Lacie sleep in bed with her, a key provision that Money says was in the adoption agreement both parties signed in April 2018. Syracuse.com reported that according to the lawsuit, Money regularly visited Lacie in her new home after the adoption and found the cat to be skittish and fearful, and became very upset after Romano’s husband allegedly admitted, “We don’t let Lacie sleep with us.” By Dec. 20, tensions had increased to the point that Romano complained to the Onondaga County Sheriff’s office and had her lawyer send Money a letter ordering her to stop contacting Romano. Money’s lawsuit accuses Romano of breach of contract and lying about her intention to let Lacie sleep in her bed, and demands the return of the cat.

Unclear on the concept

In a report published on Feb. 18, the South Florida Sun Sentinel reveals school districts struggling to comply with the state’s requirement that every school have “a good guy with a gun” are challenged to find enough qualified applicants. Among recent hiccups: Near Orlando, a safeschool officer sent her husband a nude video she recorded in a school bathroom while on her lunch break. In Hillsborough County, a school guardian thought her gun was unloaded when she shot through a mirror as she practiced in front of it for her firearms certification. Another officer pawned his service weapon and ballistic vest; his supervisor discovered he was carrying a pellet gun in his holster.

Bob Gualtieri, sheriff in Pinellas County, remarked: “The reality is there is no perfect in the world.”

Clever

Vincent Putrino, captain of the cross-country/track and field team at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in Troy, New York, and his teammates, craved Chick-fil-A for lunch on Feb. 22, but the only location closer than an hour and a half away was at the Albany International Airport — beyond the security checkpoint. So, reported News10, the 18 teammates pooled their money (about $5.50 each), bought a one-way ticket to Fort Lauderdale, Florida ($98, the cheapest they could find), and sent Putrino in to collect the bounty. Putrino purchased $227 worth of food, then left the airport and joined his teammates for their midday meal.

na’s father, Richard, said, and attempts by police to uncover the source were unsuccessful. The Federal Communications Commission couldn’t help either.

Richard Smith believes something in the wall is receiving a signal from one of the six radio towers near the home, but an engineer sent to the home from one of the stations told him: “I got to be honest with you, I don’t know what is acting as a speaker.” The Smiths have been advised to hire an engineer to pinpoint the signal and block it, but in the meantime, Brianna falls asleep in her parents’ room.

The entrepreneurial spirit

The Spanish Civil Guard raided an underground cigarette factory on Feb. 13 and 14 in the southern province of Malaga and found a facility with a complete production line capable of producing 3,500 cigarettes an hour as well as beds and living quarters for the workers, the Associated Press reported. Access to the plant, located 13 feet under a horse stable, was disguised by a cargo container. Twenty people, from the U.K., Ukraine and Lithuania, were arrested, said police, and more than 3 million cigarettes, some hashish and marijuana, as well as weapons, were seized.

Visit newsoftheweird.com.

Old story, new twist

An Oklahoma City homeowner hearing noises in his attic suspected squirrels might have gotten in, but when he went to inspect, he found instead ... a man, lying on a mattress. KOCO News reported on Feb. 28 the unnamed homeowner called 911 and reported a “stranger in my house. ... I have a gun on him right now.” Police responding to the call told reporters “there was actually somebody that appeared to have taken up residence in [the] attic,” and the home has a staircase “that goes up the side of the house with attic access.”

The homeowner escorted the squatter at gunpoint to the driveway, where officers were waiting.

Oops!

Dylan Bryant found more adventure than he expected on Feb. 23 as he explored a bayou in southwest Houston. Bryant told KTRK his exploration took him about 100 yards down a sewer line before he became trapped. “I can’t go back because of how I had to scooch through,” Bryant said. “I’m in the middle of raw, open sewage in this little bitty box.” From under the street, Bryant yelled for help and a man heard him, then asked a passerby to call 911.

Firefighters arrived and pulled Bryant out of his smelly predicament.

It’s a mystery

The Smith family of Lockport, Illinois, has a perplexing extra feature in their house that has occasionally kept the family up at night for about six years: “There are voices in the wall, and I don’t know what it is,” 9-year-old Brianna Smith told WLS. Music and talk radio emanate from the walls in Brianna’s room in the middle of the night, but the family can’t figure out why. There are no speakers in the walls, Brian-

SEACOAST SCENE | MARCH 5 - 18, 2020 | PAGE 30

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