Seacoast Scene 5-9-19

MAY 9 - 15, 2019

EATS

Why mobile bites are everywhere

A WORD FROM LARRY

Master McGrath’s

Truck time Do you like flashing lights, loud sirens and big trucks? Well, next weekend, New Hampshire Towing Association 47th Annual Tow Show will be at the Hampton Beach State Park on Saturday, Larry Marsolais May 18, and Sunday, May 19. This is an amazing event where hundreds of tow trucks from all over New England come together for a weekend of fun. I have been there, so I know firsthand that you will see many demonstrations, from lifting a large dump truck off of its side to parking a tractor trailer and more.

The highlight of this event is on Sunday morning when, at 10 a.m., all of the trucks line up for a very long parade. They start at the state park and go along the beach to High

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Street then up to Route1 and back, with lights flashing and sirens blowing. For the past 33 years the parade goes by my street and I am out there watching. If you have a chance, take a trip down there and bring the kids — there is much to see and do and you will enjoy it.

It will be an exciting weekend to spend at Hampton Beach, and this could also be your last weekend to get down to the beach and enjoy some of the best food around before the tourist population returns — after all Memorial Day Weekend is right around the corner.

And as always, I would love to hear from our readers on how we are doing. Feel free to call me anytime at 603-935-5096 to discuss local issues or to place an ad.

Larry Marsolais is the general manager of the Seacoast Scene and the former president of the Hampton Rotary Club.

Come sing...or just sing along!

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MAY 9 - 15, 2019 VOL 44 NO 10

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Larry Marsolais Seacoast Scene General Manager 603-935-5096 larry@seacoastscene.net

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Curb Appeal Meals in Hampton. Courtesy photo.

COVER STORY 6 Food truck eats

MAPPED OUT 12 Beaches, restrooms, where to walk your dog and more

PEOPLE & PLACES 13 The coolest Seacoast dwellers and scenes

FOOD 18 Eateries and foodie events

POP CULTURE 22 Books, art, theater and classical

NITE LIFE 24 Music, comedy and more

BEACH BUM FUN 26 Puzzles, horoscopes and crazy news Your weekly guide to the coast.

Published every Thursday (1st copy free; 2nd $1).

Seacoast Scene PO Box 961 Hampton NH 03843 603-935-5096 | www.seacoastscene.net

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4 SHORE THINGS

EVENTS TO CHECK OUT MAY 9 - 15, 2019, AND BEYOND Flowers and food

The Hampton Garden Club hosts its annual Plant & Bake Sale Saturday, May 11, from 8 a.m. to noon at the Centre School, 53 Winnacunnet Road. There will be annuals, perennials,hanging baskets, decorated rocks, baked goods and a silent auction of rain barrels, plus a kids craft table.

Art on display

The Hampton Art Network’s latest featured artist, with work on display at Hampton Town Hall, is Sarah Morrison Yates. The title of the display is “A Visit to the Past - Star Island, Isles of Shoals” and will be on display until the end of June. The public may view the artwork during regular business hours.

Recovery forum

A story of friendship

Steel Magnolias opens at the Seacoast Repertory Theatre (125 Bow St., Portsmouth) on May 9 and continues through June 1, with showtimes on Thursday at 7:30 p.m., Friday at 8 p.m., Saturday at 2 and 8 p.m., and Sunday at 2 p.m. The play centers on the bond shared by a group of women — a hair stylist, a wealthy widow, the local curmudgeon, an intelligent career woman and her daughter, pregnant and engaged to be married — as they face life, love and loss in the small town of Chinquapin, Louisiana. Tickets cost $16 to $44. Visit seacoastrep.org. or call 433-4472.

Seven Seacoast Rotary Clubs have joined forces to raise awareness and education of the opioid epidemic and substance use disorders in their communities. The Hampton Rotary will sponsor a free, comprehensive Recovery with Hope and Dignity forum on Thursday, May 9, from 6 to 8 p.m. at Winnacunnet High School in Hampton from 6 to 8 p.m. This educational forum is designed to highlight NH’s new huband-spoke system of care for people suffering with substance use disorders, as well as discuss treatment and recovery options. All are welcome to attend.

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Curb Appeal Meals in Hampton. Courtesy photo.

When Kerry Fay launched the Hampton-based Curb Appeal Meals food truck in 2017, it was a new opportunity for her to try all types of menu options. Today you can find her at several festivals across the Seacoast and parked outside breweries and other businesses. In fact, she’s booked almost every weekend now through the end of the summer.

Mobile cook units, including food trucks, food trailers and concession vendors, are on the rise in New Hampshire.

According to Colleen Smith of the state’s Department of Health & Human Services, there are currently 174 licensed mobile units, compared to 107 in April 2016. That SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 6

BY MATT INGERSOLL does not count food trucks that operate only as temporary food establishments at events like multi-day fairs, or occasional food establishments that operate four days or less in a 30-day period, she said.

With food trucks continuing to rise in popularity, Fay said the public perception of the trend in New Hampshire is changing as well.

“I think people are definitely embracing it and getting more and more excited about the concept,” she said. “I used to hear the phrase ‘roach coach’ a lot, and sometimes I still do once in a while, but not like I used to. … It’s getting a lot more mainstream and I think people like the idea of calling a

food truck for their parties or to be at their weddings. Who would have thought five or 10 years ago people would have food truck weddings? But they do.”

DIVERSITY IN FLAVORS

Food truckers in New Hampshire come from a variety of backgrounds — including seasoned chefs, former catering company owners, and even a few with no prior experience in the food industry.

Chef Chris “Koz” Kozlowski, for example, has nearly three decades of cooking experience, including as the chef and owner of the former Crescent City Bistro & Rum Bar, and the Orchard Street Chop

Shop, both in Dover. He launched his food trailer, Chef Koz’s Crescent City Kitchen, in 2017.

“I was spending long hours in the restaurant, and I kept missing my kids’ soccer games and all that,” Kozlowski said, “and finally I just said ‘I’ve got to do something’ … and so my mother-in-law threw out this idea of doing a food truck, and I soon gave it some some thought and really looked into it, and decided, ‘Well, what about a trailer?’ … I liked the idea of taking a trailer anywhere on the back of your car.”

He started doing research on what the new business venture would take. He sold his restaurant in December 2016, pur-

Clyde’s Cupcakes. Courtesy photo.

From state licenses to self-inspecting towns and vendor fees, food trucks in New Hampshire have quite a few boxes that need checking off in order to serve you.

That’s why you may see one food truck parked at a certain stationary location all the time, or a rotating schedule of the same food trucks at a brewery or festival.

Food trucks must apply for and obtain a mobile food unit license from the state’s Department of Health & Human Services. But there are also 15 self-inspecting cities and towns, four of which are on the Seacoast: Dover, Exeter, Portsmouth and Rochester. This means that for a truck to operate in any one of these cities and towns, a separate hawkers and peddlers license in addition to the state’s requirements must be in hand. Most cities and towns in New Hampshire also require the trucks to be parked on private property.

Because trucks are travelling from town to town, often with multiple towns inspecting them over the course of the season, Fay said the cleanliness of food trucks can be scrutinized even more than that of restaurants.

“My truck was inspected no less than once a month all last summer,” she said.

“Every time you show up at a festival you get inspected pretty much by that town.”

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aioli, but you might also find items like Asian steamed buns, cheeseburger or Buffalo chicken egg rolls, beer-battered cod, Thai peanut chicken wraps and more.

“It’s a lot of fun, because I change the menu so that it’s not so repetitive all the time,” Fay said.

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chased a custom-built 22-foot trailer, and drove down to Georgia to pick it up a few months later.

Named after the city of New Orleans — known as “The Crescent City” — Chef Koz’s Crescent City Kitchen features a menu of made-from-scratch cajun, creole and Caribbean-inspired items.

“You have a lot of taco trucks out there,” Kozlowski said, “and yes, we have tacos, but we make sure we do them differently.

So for example we do mahi-mahi now with an Asian slaw and remoulade sauce. Something completely different than any other truck.”

Since his first event in June 2017, Kozlowski has immersed himself in the New England food truck world and now even helps out in the planning stages of several food truck festivals throughout the year, including two in Rochester, in May and in August. His trailer is booked for at least one day nearly every weekend now through the middle of October.

He also launched a second food trailer last winter that he calls The Haute Box, which features New England regional comfort foods, and recently became the first food truck-based business to apply for and receive an off-site catering license from the state Liquor Commission. For the summer months, he’s renaming it KozBar, since it will only feature drinks.

Fay had experience working for restaurants and catering companies across the Seacoast, but after purchasing her truck from a Portsmouth-based catering company, she decked out the outside and created a menu all her own.

She’s known for a few staples, like sliced avocados that are breaded, deepfried and served with a homemade chipotle

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Curb Appeal Meals. Courtesy photo.

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FESTIVAL FRENZY

You might see a food truck parked at your local Old Home Days event or outside the front doors of your favorite brewery, but food truck festivals can often feature a dozen or more trucks together in one location. Most are free or have a small admittance cost, but the festivals allow you to sample different food options, priced per item from each truck.

“Food truck festivals are kind of a whole different beast versus any other kind of festival,” Fay said. “When people go to a food truck festival, their purpose to be there is that they are going to try things from multiple trucks. When it’s just a regular festival, like an art fair or a music festival, they are usually going to pick one truck to eat at, and that’s it. They are not going to go from

truck to truck.”

Upcoming area festivals include the Rochester Food Truck SpringFest on Sunday, May 19, and the third annual Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival in downtown Somersworth on Saturday, June 8.

Most food truck festivals will also feature beer tents, live music performances, lawn games and other family-friendly activities.

A MOBILE CAMARADERIE

Whether it’s festivals or private catering events, most food truck owners don’t look at each other as competitors — in fact, they support one another.

“If I’m at a festival and somebody asks for something and we don’t have it, I’ll say, oh no, but you can get that item at this truck over here, and I’ll tell them which truck it’s at,” Fay said. “I think the common 10

Upcoming food truck festivals al Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival from 1 to 7 p.m. in downtown Somersworth (High and Market streets).

There will be several food trucks plus beer and live music. Admission is free. Visit thefallschamber.com.

• Sunday, Aug. 11: This will be the second food truck festival at the Lilac Mall (5 • Sunday, May 19: The Rochester Food Milton Road, Rochester). Admission is free.

Truck SpringFest, happening from noon See “Rochester NH Food Truck Festival” to 5 p.m., is one of two food truck festivals happening this year at the Lilac Mall on Facebook.

• Sunday, Aug. 18: Food Truck Festivals (5 Milton Road, Rochester). There will be an array of food trucks, in addition to a beer of America will host its sixth annual New Hampshire Food Truck Festival at Cisco garden, live music and street vendors selling various merchandise. Admission is free. Brewers (35 Corporate Drive, Portsmouth) See “Rochester NH Food Truck Festival” from noon to 5 p.m. General admission is on Facebook. $5 for adults and free for children ages 12 and under. Visit foodtruckfestivalsofameri• Saturday, June 8: The Falls Chamber ca.com/new-hampshire. of Commerce is presenting its third annuFood truck season is in full swing now across the Seacoast. Check out this list of all the upcoming area food truck festivals happening this season. Prices in each listing reflect the admission fees; all foods are priced separately per item.

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Soul Patrol BBQ. Courtesy photo.

8 feeling is that we all want each other to be busy and to have a good day. There’s enough business out there for all of us, I think.”

Since holding the grand opening in April 2016 for The Forking Awesome Food Truck, a Goffstown-based Tex-Mex truck that is scheduled to appear at the Somersworth event in June, owner Dana Prive has received inquiries from other local potential food truck owners for business advice.

“We get contacted, and they’ll say to us, ‘You’ve been in business for years and seem to have been doing quite well. How do you do it?’ Prive said.

There’s even a private Facebook group page out there, for food truck owners only.

Kozlowski created the group shortly after he launched his trailer, and he said now it has more than 140 followers who are all New England food truck owners, in addition to a few just over the Vermont and 126154

New York State border.

“I was chairman of the board of the New Hampshire Lodging & Restaurant Association in 2010 in Concord,” Kozlowski said, “and it was a good network for communicating through that group for restaurants to talk about certain issues. … There were national Facebook pages for food trucks, but I realized that there wasn’t anything more local.”

Fay said truck owners who are members can use the group page to inquire about issues they may have with their truck, ask questions about festivals, and even share inquiries they’ve received from event organizers or private parties if they can’t take it themselves. Kozlowski is the administrator of the page.

“I don’t represent trucks,” Kozlowski said. “I’m just doing my part to help elevate the food truck industry up in New England.”

Food trucks and trailers

This list includes New Hampshire food trucks, food trailers and mobile caterers that will travel or have travelled to the Seacoast, or will appear at area festivals this season.

• Baked, Brewed & Organically Moo’ed (organicallymooed.com) features a menu of organic ice cream, locally roasted coffee and baked goods, include housemade ice cream sandwiches and waffle cones. They are based in Barnstead but travel all over the state, specializing in weddings, graduations, corporate events and house parties.

• Boogalows Island BBQ (boogalowsislandbbq.com) specializes in Jamaican food items, like mango barbecue chicken skewers, jerk pork on sweet Hawaiian rolls and more.

They will be at the Exeter Arts & Music Fest at Swasey Parkway on Saturday, May 18.

Catering opportunities are also available.

• Chef Koz’s Crescent City Kitchen (flatironcateringnh.com) is a custom-built 22-foot mobile food trailer specializing in made-from-scratch cajun, creole and Caribbean-inspired items, like cajun chicken and andouille sausage jambalaya, ropa vieja Cuban po’ boy sandwich, red beans and rice and more. Owner and chef Chris “Koz” Kozlowski also recently launched a second food trailer called The Haute Box, which features New England regional comfort foods, like American chop suey, Buffalo chicken macaroni and cheese and more. Chef Koz’s next area events include the Rochester Food Truck SpringFest on Sunday, May 19, and the third annual Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival in downtown Somersworth on Saturday, June 8.

• Clyde’s Cupcakes (clydescupcakes.com) has two dessert trucks based in Exeter that specialize in cupcakes, brownies, cakes, cookies and edible cookie dough. They’ll next be at the Rochester Food Truck SpringFest on Sunday, May 19.

• Curb Appeal Meals (kerrysculinarycreations.com) is a Hampton-based food truck with an ever-changing menu, as well as regular staples like avocado fries and slow-roasted

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Clyde’s Cupcakes. Courtesy photo.

pulled pork tacos. Their next events include the Rochester Food Truck SpringFest on Sunday, May 19, and the third annual Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival in downtown Somersworth on Saturday, June 8.

• The Daily Press (greatcirclecatering.com) is a new food truck that’s an extension of Great Circle Catering in Portsmouth, specializing in warm panini sandwiches, tater tots, salads and more.

• The Food Shack (thefoodshacknh.com) is a permanently located food truck at 337 Calef Highway in Epping, offering fresh seafood, lobster and crab rolls, chowders, haddock wraps, Buffalo chicken wraps, burgers and more. They open for the season on Monday, May 13.

• The Forking Awesome Food Truck (awesomenh.com) is based in Goffstown but appears at several festivals across the state, including on the Seacoast. They are scheduled to be at the third annual Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival in downtown Somersworth on Saturday, June 8. The menu features Tex-Mex options like tacos, burritos, gorditas and more, plus specials for this season, like poutine pierogi.

• The Fuse Box Mobile Kitchen (fuseboxmobilekitchen.com) is a Mexican and Asian fusion food truck based in Dover, specializing in tacos, burritos, quesadillas, rice bowls, ribs and more.

• Jayrard’s Java Cafe (facebook.com/jayrardsjavacafe) is a new food trailer coming soon that will travel within New Hampshire, specializing in gourmet coffees from around the world. They will be serving coffee, lattes, blended coffees, nitro brew draft coffees, teas and non-coffee beverages.

• Kimberly’s Gluten Free Kitchen (kimberlysglutenfreekitchen.net) is a food truck based in North Conway that offers corn tortilla street tacos, loaded tater tots and more.

They will be at the third annual Seacoast Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival in downtown Somersworth on Saturday, June 8.

• Lee Circle Grocery on Wheels (find them on Facebook), based in Lee, features a menu of fresh ground hamburgers, steak subs, hand-breaded chicken, and seafood, like fried clams and lobster rolls.

• Soul Patrol BBQ & Grill (facebook.com/ soulpatrolbbqandgrill) is a Seacoast-based food trailer offering slow-cooked barbecue staples, like pulled pork, brisket, smoked sausages and more, plus sides like cornbread, macaroni and cheese, collard greens and baked beans. Their next area festival is the Rochester Food Truck SpringFest on Sunday, May 19.

• Stone Oven Catering (stoneovencatering. com) is a mobile wood-fired pizza oven trailer based in Exeter that specializes in handmade, Neapolitan-style pizzas in 90 seconds.

• Wrap Shack (facebook.com/wrapshackportsmouth) is based in Portsmouth and offers wraps like chicken salad, Thai peanut, chicken Caesar and falafel, plus items like fish tacos, sweet potato fries and more.

For family fun meet us at the Community Oven!

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With this coupon. In house only. Not valid with any other offer. One per visit. Expires 5/31/2019 126782 SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 11

The Scene’s

Coastal Map

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Public beaches, parks and walking trails. Brought to you by:

Pierce Island

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North Hampton

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Exeter

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Hampton

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1A North Hampton Beach

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150

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Burrows-Brookside Sanctuary

North Beach Hampton Beach State Park

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Salisbury State Reservation

Eastern March Trail

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Plum Island Newburyport

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B R OW N S

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PEOPLE AND PLACES

MILES WOODWORTH SEACOAST FLASH

How did you get into this line of work?

When I was young I was always interested in cinema and always wondered how movies were made. I remember taking all the video production classes my high school had to offer. After high school I attended The University of the Arts in Philadelphia and studied Film & Digital video and graduated with a BFA. I soon realized my passion for storytelling through videography.

What is the most challenging aspect about what you do?

One of the most challenging aspects about owning my own videography business is that I wear all the hats. I do all the pre-production, shooting and post-production for all my projects.

What is the most gratifying aspect about your work?

I love sharing the work I do. After all the shooting and editing, the best part is showing the final video to the client.

What is your favorite part about living on the Seacoast? Are you from here originally?

I was born and raised on the Seacoast. After attending college in Philadelphia, I realized how special of a place the Seacoast was for me to start my business here. I love working and collaborating with the Seacoast community.

How long have you been in operation?

I started Seacoast Flash six years ago.

Are summers more or less busy for you?

Every season is different with the work I do. The work flow comes in waves. But yes, summer is one of the busiest seasons.

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What is your business about? Talk a little bit about your concept of a branding video — what is that?

I specialize in business branding videography on the Seacoast. I work with businesses and brands to help share the work they do through testimonial videos, business overview videos, promotional videos and event highlight videos.

What do you consider your core [role] as a business brand videographer?

My job is to tell the story of a brand through capturing the people, products, services and spaces. I love learning about people’s brands and in turn educating others on what it is that they love to do.

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Miles Woodworth. Courtesy photo.

When not working, what do you do for fun?

When I’m not working I’m probably out shooting with other videographers for my YouTube channel.

Saturday, May 18th 7pm Alien (40th Anniversary)

What sort of stuff is on your channel?

The content on my YouTube channel is branding videos, vlogs and travel videos.

In looking ahead, anything new or exciting on the horizon for you or your business?

I have traveled more for work in the last three years then I have ever traveled and I can not wait to see where else videography will take me.

[Did you] travel anywhere exotic or mostly on the Seacoast?

In the last three years I have traveled to Panama, Mexico and Costa Rica.

Did you have a favorite place? What was most interesting about it?

Panama was a very eye-opening experience. My partner Raya Al-Hashmi and I were on assignment there documenting a yoga retreat for 10 days. We met so many amazing people from all different walks of life.

Given that you grew up here, would you ever consider living abroad or moving somewhere else, or is this it?

This is a great question. That comes up a lot. The Seacoast is such an amazing place where you can experience all the seasons. For right now, this is home and where my business lives. We are planning on making big travel plans every winter.

— Rob Levey

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SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 13

PEOPLE AND PLACES

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Cliff sides, sandy shorelines, crashing waves, sleepy beach towns — the imagery of coastal shore has been the inspiration behind many vivid landscape paintings, such as Claude Monet’s “Cliffs at Etratat.” Others take to photography to express these seacoast scenes. Joseph Tarella, professional architect by day, channels his creative side into coastal art maps.

In the early 2000’s, Tarella decided to build a beach home on the stunning coast of Long Beach Island, New Jersey. Pretty quickly, Tarella realized that none of the maps available of the area he was considering for his beach home were remotely current.

“The most recent one was from like the ’50s,” he said.

A lover of maps and the history they tell, Tarella got creative, pooling available resources of the area, and painted his own map — his very first in what would become a series.

“People would come visit the house, see the map,” Tarella said, “and ask if I could make one for them too. So I made reproductions. About a thousand, actually. Soon people were asking, ‘When’s the next one?’”

Nearly two decades later, Tarella has released his 38th coastal art map, one that should be familiar to New Englanders — the New Hampshire Seacoast. With the most southern part of the map notating Newburyport, Massachusetts, and the very north marking Kittery, Maine, the map, like the others in Tarella’s Coastal Art Maps series, is more than just roads and the coastline where land meets water.

The uniqueness to these maps comes from Tarella’s extensive research. He calls upon sea maps, road atlases and even Google Earth to combine a map that shows the depths of the ocean near the coastline, the rise and fall of the land, the long stretches of highway, rail tracks and even into the little backroads through beach towns such as Hampton and Rye. He even mapped the Hampton Beach boardwalk.

Like Long Beach Island residents, the New Hampshire Seacoast residents take pride in where they live, something that speaks to Tarella.

“People connect with [the map],” he said. “They want to hold it in their hands, and they appreciate the hand quality effort, that it wasn’t just perfectly designed to exact measurements on a computer.”

After completing his preliminary research antique-inspired maps, Tarella proceeds with a draft of the map, followed by pencil and ink, then watercolors to bring

Image by Joseph Tarella.

his vision to life: greens and blues, with more populated areas such as Hampton in something of a clay red. Technically two dimensional, his minimalist use of these three colors, and their various shades, creates a depth and texture to the map you can almost feel with your hand.

To Tarella, the Seacoast captures quintessential New England qualities into a small area — “[It’s] something like only 16 miles long, but it has harbors, cliffs, beaches. I love the detail that’s just so unique to the area.”

New Hampshire’s Seacoast aside, other maps that Tarella has done include areas in Massachusetts such as Martha’s Vineyard, as well as the coasts of New Jersey, New York, Delaware, Florida, Virginia, Maryland and South Carolina. He welcomes customized orders upon request, and he said he’s always happy to correspond with anyone who wants to discuss the maps.

“My collection of maps allow me to combine my architectural experience, passion for travel and love of maps — as well as an endless fascination with the ocean — into beautiful finished products that I’ve been able to share with many like-minded people around the country,” Tarella said.

“What started out as a singular effort of creating a map of my hometown in New Jersey has transformed, over several decades, into a labor-of-love production that has allowed me to explore and represent dozens of truly interesting and beautiful locations.”

Tarella’s maps can be purchased at CoastalArtMaps.com.

— Mike Costello

CAR TALK

What to do when your rear end is gone

By Ray Magliozzi

— Ava

Dear Car Talk: I have a 2006 Buick Rendezvous. My rear end is completely gone, so I’ve been told.

I am a 65-year-old, single woman. I don’t have a lot of money.

What does that mean?

Not to worry, Ava. My wife tells me my rear end is completely gone, too. But she’s still sticking with me.

The “rear end” is your mechanic’s shorthand for the differential. The differential is essentially a complex box of gears that allows the wheels to turn at different speeds when you take turns. Without it, you’d be dragging your outside wheel along the pavement whenever you turn.

Typically, when the gears wear out — or the bearings fail — the differential will start to howl. You’ll hear something that sounds like a deep whistling sound that goes up and down in pitch as you go faster and slower.

Sometimes it’ll go away when you step on the gas. Sometimes it’ll go away when you take your foot off the gas. The only

symptom that’s absolutely consistent is that, over time, it’ll drive you cuckoo.

My late brother had a bad differential in his Chevy Suburban, and until he figured it out, he was convinced the cops were following him around everywhere. And that they knew about the plastic coffee urn he stole from his local International House of Pancakes in 1967.

If you’re short on funds and want to keep this car for a while, your best bet is a used differential. Differentials will often last the life of the car. If you found a Rendezvous in a junkyard, chances are its rear differential would be fine.

Now, we don’t want you climbing around piles of wrecked cars in a junkyard, Ava. Certainly not with your worn-out rear end. You need to find a mechanic who’s willing to work with you and help you out.

Your mechanic probably has a junkyard or two he works with. He can call them and track down the right part for you.

Then he can install it.

It’s not cheap. It’ll probably cost you between $500-$1,000 including labor, depending on how much the part costs.

But you can’t continue to drive with a bad differential forever. There’s a chance that it’ll seize up on you, and that can be dan-

gerous, especially if it happens at higher speed.

So, if the alternative is to get rid of this car, spending 500 or 1,000 bucks probably makes sense, assuming the Rendezvous is otherwise in good shape. Get a mechanic to work with you, and good luck with your new rear end, Ava. Dear Car Talk: I went to Toyota to buy a trickle charger for my battery. They told me the charger they will install in my 2014 RAV4 will remain connected all the time — yearround. Does this sound right? — Elizabeth

It sounds great.

As you probably know, a trickle charger (sometimes called a battery tender) is a device that you plug into the wall and attach to your car’s battery. It keeps your battery topped up and ready to go.

You plug it in when the car is parked, and it provides a slow trickle of electricity to always keep your battery fully charged.

It’s particularly useful if you have a car that gets parked for long periods of time. So, while you’re at the International Slanket Convention for three weeks, the charger automatically senses a drop in the

battery’s voltage and turns itself on and off as needed, keeping the battery ready to go when you get home.

Normally, when you buy a trickle charger at an auto parts store, you open the hood, you attach the clamps on one end of the charger to your battery terminals, and then you plug the other end into a wall socket. When you go to drive the car, you remove the clamps, close the hood and drive away.

Rinse, lather, repeat.

It sounds like Toyota has a trickle charger that gets installed under your hood and is permanently wired to your battery.

There’s probably what we call a “pigtail,” which is like a short electrical cord that sticks out of the grill or under the front bumper.

So, when you’re heading off to the Association of Ginsu Knife Throwers meetings in Ketchikan, you just attach your household extension cord to that pigtail, and bingo, you’re all set. You never need to open the hood or fumble with any battery clamps.

It sounds very convenient to me, Elizabeth. I’d go for it.

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FOOD

AT AT BOTANICA RESTAURANT & GIN BAR When Chef Brendan Vesey learned there was space available inside the recently renovated Frank Jones Brew Yard building in Portsmouth’s West End, he knew what the concept would be for his second location. Unlike his first restaurant, the Southern-influenced Joinery in Newmarket, Botanica Restaurant & Gin Bar (110 Brewery Lane, Suite 105, Portsmouth, 373-0979, botanicanh.com) features French-influenced dishes and a bar with around 30 types of gin, all in an upscale and intimate atmosphere. Dinner is served five nights a week, with items like steak frites (grilled hanger steak with madefrom-scratch fries and a brandy sauce) and cassoulet (a rich hearty casserole of beans and sausage), plus French cheeses, handmade pastas and more.

While the gin is the star of the drink menu, with nearly a dozen specialty gin cocktails, several French wines and other spirits are also available. The Scene recently spoke with Vesey about some of his favorite dishes and what you can expect when you visit.

How long has Botanica Restaurant & Gin Bar been around?

About two and a half months. I had worked at a couple of French restaurants when I was younger, and I learned that French techniques and styles are kind of the basis for a lot of western cuisines. So I loved that about it and I loved the romanticism of the idea of creating an upscale French restaurant.

What makes Botanica Restaurant & Gin Bar unique?

There really wasn’t anything on the West End of the city yet as far as fine dining, and this area is growing rapidly. So the more

SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 16

neighborhood kind of fine dining was what appealed to me, while still running a place that is hip and modern in a way. Our servers and bartenders dress nice and we try to be formal for people who are on an important date or anniversary dinner. Basically, we want it to feel like a celebration.

What is your personal favorite drink or dish?

Right now I would say the agnolotti, which is a handmade pasta filled with fromage blanc and served with some grilled oyster mushrooms.

Botanica Restaurant and Gin Bar in Portsmouth. Courtesy photos.

What is a dish that everyone should try?

The duck confit has been especially popular. It’s a duck leg slowly cooked in duck fat and crisped up in a pan that comes [with] gnocchi, some leeks and a red wine sauce.

What is an essential skill to running a restaurant?

You have to be able to work hard while also being flexible [with] your schedule. I think the other thing that’s really important is to be able to put aside your own emotions and worries and everything else and put your guests first and foremost.

What is your favorite part of being on the Seacoast?

I’ve lived here for about 10 years, and there are a lot of things I love about it, [like] the weather and the distinct seasons. It’s a beautiful place to live in the summer or the winter. I love how you know what season it is all the time and just the natural beauty of it. Professionally, the Seacoast has the finest group of collaborative chefs I’ve ever known.

There are a ton of us that get along really well and help each other out whenever it is needed.

— Matt Ingersoll

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Photo by Allison Willson Dudas.

One of the earliest local crops is lettuce. Lettuce is wonderfully hardy and therefore one of the first things you can buy at the farmers market. Many farmers (and home growers as well!) have the capacity to start greens indoors, lengthening their growing season even more and making them more available to consumers in New Hampshire. I am so excited to see more of my local farmers next month, when most of the outdoor farmers markets begin around here!

For now, I’m enjoying lēf Farms’ spice blend, which includes mizuna, cressida, arugula, mustard and leaf lettuce varieties. They’re grown hydroponically year round in Loudon. Because of the flavor profile, it’s really delicious with a bit of sweetness. Plus, it’s loaded with vitamins A and C. I used to avoid leafy greens with such a strong taste, but I realized I was eating them all wrong. Now, I reach for something spicy and pair it with some-

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thing sweet to smooth the whole thing out. I received the recommendation for the salad below from lēf Farms’ Sales and Marketing Manager Don Grandmaison. Since he’s pretty familiar with their products, I figured I better trust him on the recipe. I wasn’t wrong — it was delicious!

Maybe you get your greens from the supermarket or maybe you grow them yourself. Regardless, there are so many varieties to try. Don’t get stuck in a rut with romaine, iceberg or spinach; reach for something new. Not only will your taste buds thank you, but your body will get to experience the variety of nutrients that comes from a different kind of green.

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DRINK

Keeping it light Don’t ignore pale ales

I remember my first sip of Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. I was in college, and I hadn’t had much exposure to beer varieties beyond, you know, Coors Light or Bud Light or Miller Lite.

I remember that first sip as awfully jarring, thick and bitter and, well, just too much for me. Admittedly, that first experience left me with a negative perception of Sierra Nevada for years, which is too bad because it’s a terrific brewery.

My reaction to the Sierra Nevada Pale Ale seems silly nowadays when I enjoy much hoppier and much more bitter India Pale Ales, which have dominated the craft beer movement nationally.

But despite the continued expansion of the IPA style, we shouldn’t ignore the humble pale ale, which is really just a milder version of the IPA — or perhaps you’d prefer to think of the IPA as the crazy uncle of the pale ale.

The pale ale name stems from the 1700s when brewers began using lighter malts, which resulted in both a lighter, more “pale” appearance and a lighter flavor, allowing hops to shine, according to CraftBeerJoe.com.

In the 1800s, what can only be described as the legend of the IPA was born, when, apparently, British colonists in India were pining for their hoppy pale ales but were concerned beers would spoil during the long journey from Great Britain. As the story goes, to keep beers from spoiling, brewers added more hops and bumped up alcohol and, voila, the IPA was born.

VinePair pointed out this line of thought might be flawed as other beer styles, such as stouts and porters, seemed to be able to survive the sea journey despite no increase in hops and alcohol. But you know what, it’s a great story so let’s roll with it.

I think it’s safe to say most beer enthusiasts would agree IPAs are essentially more intense versions of a pale ale. That’s entirely subjective and I’m OK with that. Sometimes you want a little less intensity in life.

Here are a few pale ales — not IPAs — to seek out and enjoy: Shoals Pale Ale by Smuttynose Brewing Co. (Hampton) Crisp and hop forward, the Shoals Pale Ale has been a Smuttynose staple for years.

A decade ago, people likely would have remarked about how hoppy this pale ale is.

Resonation by Great Rhythm Brewing Co. (Portsmouth) Great Rhythm is known for its tremendous variety of IPAs but the brewery makes a straight pale ale as well. Resonation is “a crisp Pale Ale with a dose of resinous hops,” according to the brewery.

Tie-Dyed Dry-Hopped Pale Ale by Great North Aleworks (Manchester) Great North Aleworks initially introduced this brew as a summer seasonal offering with its smoother flavor and less intense hop character, compared to IPAs. But, the brew has become a year-round staple notable for its welcoming hop aroma.

El Dorado Falcon Pale Ale by Kettlehead Brewing Co. Kettlehead brewers describe this as hazy and hop-forward with “aromas of candied orange and tangerines with a subtle malt character.”

Juicy Boots Pale Ale by Concord Craft Brewing This beer is brewed with wheat, oats and honey malt and “supplemented” with pineapple and cranberry puree, according to the brewery, which says this is a “crisp, colorful, easy drinking ale.” With Juicy Boots, Concord Craft Brewing uses a blend of hops from the Pink Boots Society, which promotes women in brewing.

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Jeff Mucciarone is an account manager with Montagne Communications, where he provides communications support to the New Hampshire wine and spirits industry.

What’s in My Fridge Longboard Island Lager by Kona Brewing Co. (Hawaii): Sometimes you just need a beer and you don’t really want to think about it. Beyond that, I thought my wife would like this, so I picked up a variety pack from Kona Brewing Co., which includes two varieties of IPAs, the Longboard Island Lager and a Golden Ale. The Island Lager was light and refreshing, but it did have some nice floral notes and a bit more hop character than you might expect.

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SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 20

Let yourself be transported to another time during the New Hampshire Renaissance Faire, returning to Brookvale Pines Farm in Fremont on Saturday, May 11, and Sunday, May 12, and again on Saturday, May 18, and Sunday, May 19. Made to resemble a medieval village, the fair will feature period music and theatrical performances, merchants and craftsmen at work, jousting demonstrations and more.

“There’s something for everyone, things like knights in shining armor and weird creatures and performances — things you can’t see anywhere else,” said Marghi Bean, one of the fair organizers.

As always, the fair will be entirely family-friendly with games, crafts and fun activities for kids in the Children’s Glen; a family tent with changing tables where families with young children can take a break from the excitement; and performances and comedic elements that are appropriate for a younger audience.

“When you think about the kind of Shakespearean humor of the Middle Ages, it’s very bawdy and raucous, and it’s funny for adults, but not appropriate for children,” Bean said. “Our fair is familyfriendly. It’s very true to the period, but parents can bring their kids without having to cover their ears, and you don’t find that at a lot of [Renaissance] fairs.”

New this year, there will be wandering actors acting as medieval villagers who will interact with visitors, answer questions and share knowledge about the Middle Ages.

“It’s a great addition to the fair,” Bean said. “It makes it seem like a real medieval village instead of just a fairgrounds.”

Other actors and performers will include the Brotherhood of the Arrow & Sword, a reenactment group demonstrating fully armored live steel combat; The Longshanks, storytellers on stilts;

NH Renaissance Faire. Courtesy photos.

Shimmynanigans, a group of belly dancing gypsies; The Corr Thieves comedic group; magicians Mike OJ and Morrigan the Raven; pirate actors Captain Jay and The Northeast Buccaneers; Shelli Buttons, an acrobatics and aerial performer, and more. There will also be numerous musicians performing traditional Celtic tunes, lute and harp music, a capella songs and sea shanties.

“We have very good music,” Bean said.

“It’s cool how everyone gathers ‘round to listen. It really adds to the whole atmosphere and the idea of it being a medieval village.”

More than 70 merchants will be selling handmade goods, including clothes and accessories, jewelry, artwork, sculptures, leatherwork, woven items, glassware, soaps and salves, crystals and precious stones, chainmail items and more. Some will be demonstrating their crafts, includ-

ing weaving, leatherworking and jewelry making.

Additionally, there will be several fantasy authors selling and signing their books; service vendors offering tarot readings, fortune telling, henna, massages, photo ops and more; and food vendors selling ice cream, barbecue, pizza and gourmet sweets and snacks.

One of the biggest draws, Bean said, is the jousting demonstration.

“It’s something you read about in books: the knight in shining armor on the horse, jousting to save the princess. It’s all very romantic,” she said,” but it’s not something you get to see except at Renaissance fairs, and people want to see how it works and what it looks like.”

Other attractions will include an archery range, knight encampment demonstrations, an auction, belly dancing lessons and exotic animals.

Also new this year, each day of the fair will have a theme for attendees who want to dress up: May 11 is Game of Thrones, May 12 is fairs and wizards, May 18 is pirates and barbarians and May 19 is steampunk and time travelers.

Bean said the fair is not only fun but also educational.

“We try to push the whole educational part of it and pull in a lot of [fair participants] who are willing [to teach their craft],” she said. “When you get to learn from a knight about medieval warfare or from a musician about medieval instruments, those things stick … and really enlarge your idea of what history was like.”

— Angie Sykeny

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When you first meet the Lee Family — grandmother Margot, mother Harriet and daughter Perdita — they seem just about as ordinary as you can get, albeit perhaps a touch dysfunctional. Protagonist Harriet seems every bit the typical suburban mother who has let her social life fall to the wayside as she focuses on raising her daughter, Perdita, now a teenager.

In an attempt to reclaim some semblance of a social life and gain favor in the community, Harriet spends most of her time obsessively trying to make a name for herself in the Parental Power Association — a variant of the Parent Teacher Association — usually by baking gingerbread, a special recipe that has been handed down through the family, perfected and modified over the years.

Meanwhile, Perdita sounds every bit your average sullen teenager, faking school permission slips for overnight trips to Canterbury and playing hooky, leaving Harriet to worry and wonder about the lack of communication that has grown between them.

However, as the story unfolds, you realize that it’s not only Oyeyemi’s descriptive language that is unique and fairytale-like; the world of the Lee family is anything but ordinary and average.

Over the next pages, what at first looks like Perdita’s suicide attempt you soon learn is actually astral travel, aided, yes, by gingerbread. Far from depressed, Perdita is merely curious and soul-searching, and her actions are only a result of her burning curiosity to learn more about her past and to locate a long-lost friend of her mother’s (named Gretel, appropriately).

Harriet realizes that she has done a disservice to the girl by not explaining her heritage to her — and, of most interest to Perdita, who her father is. Reluctantly, Harriet sits down (with not only Perdita but also her four dolls, who are somehow sentient beings) and explains the story of her past.

Harriet hails from Druhastrana, a “nation state of indeterminable geographic location” where she once worked as a gingerbread girl (this is described as a “cushy job as a professional child impersonator,” although the reality of the position sounds much more unsavory) to help her mother, Margot, make ends meet.

Gingerbread girls have a complicated existence; they spend their days making gingerbread that they aren’t allowed to eat (instead, they survive on a steady diet of gruel) and their evenings forced to coquettishly entertain patrons they can barely stand. One of the most unsettling elements of the entire operation is when

the girls catch on that they’re being sent fake letters from their families, but “A lot of the girls didn’t mind this: they found this mother ... assigned to them was much better at cheering them on than their actual mothers were.”

Gingerbread can feel vaguely disorienting, but mostly in a good way. The prose is beautiful but the message somewhat unclear. Sometimes your location in time and space is precarious, and a sudden mention of modern life — like a cell phone, The Jerry Springer Show or Tumblr, for example — can feel a bit jarring.

All in all, the story has a lovely feel to it — the language is unique, and due to the fantastical elements it can be hard to tell what is real and what is fairy tale. But I found my experience to be somewhat marred by the slow pacing and the muddy introduction of a broad, forgettable cast of supporting characters, some of whom have little importance and don’t seem to drive the story forward.

Even as far as the protagonist was concerned, I didn’t find myself at all invested in her journey. There are a number of strong chapters throughout, but at other times the story is hard to follow, and there doesn’t seem to be much by the way of a satisfactory payoff — Oyeyemi herself even seems surprised at the start of Chapter 14 when she pops in to break the fourth wall and ask the reader, “hmm... still here?,” as if she knows by now that many may have given up before they reached this point.

In the end, the book measures up about as well as its namesake confection — it’s an interesting taste, but it lacks real substance. C — Alison Downs

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SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 23

NITE

A fan’s show

Summit Indie Fest returns to Book & Bar Though Joel Greer isn’t a musician, he has an excellent ear for music. Coupling that talent with a dogged determination to share his love of local and regional talent with others led to Summit Indie Fest. The all-day event, in its second year, offers a multi-genre array of performers from New Hampshire, Massachusetts and as far away as New York.

“For lack of a better term, I’m a professional appreciator of music, but I was never able to play,” Greer said by phone from his home in Lawrence, Mass. “I thought that curating a music festival would be a good way to introduce a little bit of art into the world.”

Greer’s criteria for what to book are personal.

“Let me find bands that I’d drive a long way to see on a Monday or Tuesday night,” he said. “It’s not about ticket sales, but more about following my heart [and] I also targeted bands that I consider underappreciated.”

It’s a wide-ranging lineup — 10 acts, playing on two stages, inside and outside Portsmouth Book & Bar, from afternoon into the evening.

Kingsley Flood is slated to close the show. They’re a Boston Music Awardwinning band fronted by Naseem Khuri, a modern-day Woody Guthrie with a keen contemporary eye, as evidenced in their 2018 album, Neighbors and Strangers.

On one song, “Fifth of July,” the child of Palestinian immigrants sings, “Call me a trespasser and untrue, and I’ll tell your history better than you.”

One of Greer’s favorites is Troll 2, also hailing from Boston — Jamaica Plain, to be precise. He likes the folk-punk band’s mix of social awareness and offbeat spirit.

“They have a fun saying: ‘When you come see us, we play music and you fall down.’ They never play down to a venue; they set their own atmosphere, and it’s so infectious,” he said.

Brooklyn-based Def.GRLS sports a fun, lo-fi, ‘shrooms and surfing sound that fans of early B-52s records will gobble up.

“The genre-bending trio is impossible to pigeonhole,” a press release said, calling them “perpetually oscillating between the irreverent, macabre, hilarious and heartfelt.”

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Where: Portsmouth Book & Bar, 40 Pleasant St., Portsmouth Tickets: $29 at summitindiefest.com

Gretchen Klempa. Courtesy photo.

brought a soulful, brassy sound to the festival. This year, lead singer and keyboard player Gretchen Klempa returns with her own quartet.

“She’s really great solo, with a really talented bunch of musicians backing her up,” Greer said. “The vibe is really cool.”

For straight up rock ’n’ roll, look no further than Carissa Johnson, whose fullthrottle approach recalls early aughts Boston bands Aloud and Damone. In 2017 the singer-guitarist won Boston’s highly competitive Rock & Roll Rumble and capped the year with a Boston Music Award win for Best New Act (she received four BMA nominations in 2018).

Asked which bands he’s most excited to have at the festival, Greer named As The Sparrow— “they’re large, it’s a full sound and they’re really top-notch songwriters” — and The Wolff Sisters — “fantastic country folk” — and added he’s also a big fan of the downtown bookstore, coffee/craft beer bar and performance space that’s hosting Summit Indie Fest.

“I wanted a venue that could really add to the event,” he said. “I approached Book and Bar because I know what a quality place it is and what an intimate setting it can be — so many big festivals lose their intimacy. I also know they totally believe in the arts too.”

Proceeds from the event will help build a music program at Team Summit, the youth development program Greer runs in Lawrence, but he’s quick to point out Summit Indie Fest isn’t a typical charity event.

“It’s a music festival first; no baskets or 50/50 raffles,” he said. “My mission is to gather in the spirit of philanthropy and share our love and passion for music.”

— Michael Witthaus

Expires 5/31/19 (SS)

Expires 5/31/19 (SS)

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BEACH BUM FUN JONESIN’ CROSSWORDS BY MATT JONES

“Start the Picture” — all featuring something in common Across 1 “Buenos Aires” musical 6 A plus 11 “Power Is Power” singer born Solána Imani Rowe 14 Moses’ mountain 15 Renault vehicle marketed in the

U.S. with a sorta-French name 16 Singer Benatar 17 It may be stunning 18 It’s put on when being courageous 20 Decays 22 “___ my case” 23 Cereal with a cuckoo mascot

26 Hercules’ stepmother 30 Social critter 31 Krypton, e.g.

32 Number of novels in “The Chronicles of Narnia” 33 First lady between Eleanor and Mamie 35 Ring arbiter 37 Epic that includes the Trojan Horse 38 Delivery person in a brown uniform 41 He played House 44 Reddit event full of questions 45 Early WWI river battle site 49 Dark-to-light hair coloring trend 50 Gp. led by Mahmoud Abbas 52 It may be a snap 53 Pre-”Happy Days” Ron Howard role 54 Host of “The Voice”

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58 Make amends 60 May come before overcast weather 61 Blockaded 65 PC platform with command lines 68 World Cup chant 69 Flash drives, memory cards, etc.

70 Some laptops 71 Ditch 72 Campus head, in headlines 73 Movie studio that the beginnings of the 5 theme answers have in common Down 1 Suffix with winning or best, slangily 2 By way of 3 Category for fleas, but not ticks 4 1990s cardio fad 5 Steering wheel safety device 6 Calgary’s prov.

7 It’s absent in the Impact font seen in many memes 8 Cold-weather wear 9 Roof overhangs 10 ___ leches cake 11 Hotel amenity 12 Efron of “17 Again” 13 Emulated Matt Stonie 19 Early Civil War battle site in Tenn.

21 Hardly packed 23 Ride around town, maybe 24 Undivided 25 Like thrift-shop goods

27 March 16, for St. Patrick’s Day (hey, someone tried it) 28 Big name in camping gear 29 As well as 32 “What’d I tell you?!”

34 Phantasmagoric 36 Address for a monk 37 “Elena of ___” (Disney Channel cartoon) 39 Diner order 40 Little demons 41 Place to go in England?

42 Guitar store buy 43 Where, in Latin 46 Stretchy fabric 47 Nigiri fish, maybe 48 Singer LaMontagne 51 Like most itineraries 54 Software writer 55 Battery terminal 56 Do more repairs on 57 Plural seen way more in Ancient Greek history than in the modern decathlon 59 Short-term worker 61 Took home 62 Comedian Siddiq 63 Superman foe’s name 64 “King Kong” actress Wray 66 “Let You Love Me” singer Rita 67 Lithuania, once (abbr.) ©2019 Jonesin’ Crosswords

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• Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Good timing is essential for success in life. Oh wait, that was last week’s horoscope.

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Occasionally, some people will take advantage of you.

• Taurus (April 20-May 20): You have so many great things about to happen in your life. I just can’t think of any right now.

• Gemini (May 21-June 20): Your days of self-doubt are coming to an end. Starting today, you can feel absolutely sure that you’re obnoxious and disliked.

• Cancer (June 21-July 22): Love is in the stars, and let’s hope so, because it sure ain’t happening here.

• Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Don’t let a grudge stop you from getting ahead.

And if that doesn’t work, try revenge.

• Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Now is the time to ramp up activities at home.

Unfortunately, your primary activity at home is hoarding.

• Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You will reap what you sow. So plant something else besides onions, for Pete’s sake.

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SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 27

BEACH BUM FUN ROCKANDROLLCROSSWORDS.com BY TODD SANTOS

JANEY WAS LOVELY SHE WAS THE QUEEN OF MY NIGHTS Across

1. Singer Yoakam might sell his old stuff at ‘Dwight’s __ Records’ 5. R&B band that wears nice clothes?

9. ‘Rich Girl’ Stefani 13. Kenny Chesney ‘__ Rainy Day’ (4,2,3,1) 16. Meat Puppets cover on Nirvana’s ‘Unplugged’ album (2,2) 17. U2 ‘02 single ‘__ Storm’

18. Jason Boland & The Stragglers ‘Live At Billy __ Texas’ 19. Rapper that did ‘Here We Go’ w/Kelly Rowland 20. UK ‘K’ band __ Shaker 22. What wasted rocker might not get through 23. Ace Frehley-covered ELO hit (2,2) 25. Bob Seger And The __ Bullet Band 27. Duran Duran ‘__ __ To A Kill’ (1,4)

30. Booker T And The __ 32. R&B singer __ Mo 33. Johnny Cash ‘__ A Picture Of Mother’ 34. ‘On The Beach’ English sing/songer Chris 35. ‘Peaceful Easy Feeling’ band 38. Prominent 80s label that doubles as a collection agcy?

39. To berate a heckler 41. Naughty By Nature “You down with __, ya you know me” 42. How all musicians want to be treated in the contract drafting 44. ‘On Through The Night’ __ Leppard 45. Beasties hit ‘__ Shot’ 46. Billy Corgan solo album song about the Defense Intelligence Agency?

47. Iconic lyricist w/last name David 48. To dry out after tour, informally 49. Escape The Fate ‘__ For Disaster’

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1. Flaming Lips ‘She Don’t __ Jelly’ 2. Pepper’s partner Bryan Ferry’s ‘River’ is made of 3. Rob Thomas ‘__ The Same’ 4. Solange Knowles “I __ that you are the him for me” 5. __ Cat Strut 6. Bob Seger “__ __ Were A Carpenter’ (2,1) 7. Bob Seger ‘__ And Load’ 8. Robert Plant sidekick Alison 9. ‘Foot In The Mouth’ Canuck punks 10. The Who ‘67 album ‘The __’ (3,4,3) 11. Dirty Three song about a piece of burning wood?

12. What touring teen rocker returns to 14. Clash can’t wait and wants to ‘Do __ __’ (2,3) 15. ‘Say (__ __ Need)’ OneRepublic

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21. Glasvegas singer James 24. Religious Meek Milk song, perhaps 26. Nirvana ‘Nevermind’ producer Butch 27. Neil Diamond song that inspired Clueless? (2,2) 28. Billy __ And The Beaters 29. Bob Seger “I felt it for the first time something deep __” (6,2,2) 31. Iron Butterfly ‘In-A-__-Da-Vida’ 34. ‘Only The Lonely’ Orbison 35. Band that sampled Andrew Dice Clay on ‘Unbelievable’ 36. Beck lead single off ‘Guero’ (hyph) 37. ‘Germfree Adolescents’ X-Ray __ 39. What original songwriter will stake in court 40. ‘Beautiful Freak’ band fronted by E 43. ‘Rockaway’ Ocasek 45. Christian rock band that let us know they work for God 47. Mötley Crüe ‘New Tattoo’ single ‘__ __ High Heels’ (4,2) 48. Vampire Weekend sang of this girl ‘Young’ 49. Maida of Our Lady Peace 50. Lyricist whose work can be studied among the greats 52. Super skinny singers, slang 53. Trios: Threes, Duos: __ 55. Bob Seger didn’t have this coin to spare in ‘Like A Rock’ 57. Beyonce covered this singer James 58. Hole hit ‘__ Parts’ 60. Reggae man __-A-Mouse 62. ‘No More Stories...’ Danish band 63. Guns N’ Roses ‘Catcher In The __’

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51. Hadise ‘__ Me Up’ 53. Rick Springfield album he recorded while on his path?

54. What seasoned player will do to protege 56. What star did from stage to fan 59. #1 Whitney Houston soundtrack ‘The Preacher’s __’ 61. ‘83 ‘Gimme All Your Lovin’ ZZTop album 64. Little River Band ‘Take It Easy __ __’ (2,2) 65. Brenda Lee ‘Break It __’ (2,2,6) 66. What Metallica will do before they ‘Destroy’ 67. Rush wants the ‘Good __ First’ 68. Love & Rockets ‘No New __ To Tell’

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Florida!

Police officers in Indialantic, Florida, responded to at least seven calls about a man disturbing the peace on April 7. Patrons of Starbucks and Sassy Granny’s Smoothies, among others, were startled when 61-year-old Thomas Devaney Lane started yelling, calling himself “the saint” and threatening to unleash his army of turtles on the community. According to WKMG, Lane went along with an officer to the police station, where he screamed at the dispatcher and pounded on the walls, but then left the building. He was located later at a 7-Eleven, verbally assaulting customers. As officers stood by, Lane called 911 and told the dispatcher, “I need to leave now or you will all be sorry you (expletive) with the saint.” Lane was charged with disturbing the peace, resisting arrest without violence and misusing 911.

a woman stuffed several colonoscopes worth $450,000 into three backpacks.

The scopes are used to examine colons during colonoscopies. “This is not something that a typical pawn shop might accept,” said Lower Merion Police Det. Sgt. Michael Vice. “My feeling would be that it was some type of black market sales.” He also told WCAU that it’s not yet clear whether it was an inside job.

Lame

Why spend all that money on a real vacation when you can just fake a trip to an iconic destination? That’s the service offered by Fake a Vacation, a Nebraska company that offers to superimpose you in a photo from a popular vacation spot, such as Las Vegas or the Grand Canyon, for posting on your social media pages.

According to United Press International, they’ll even offer you some fun facts about the place you choose to help you make your trip stories more legit. Packages start at $19.99; no word on what it The way the world works In Nashville, Tennessee, as the NFL costs to get your dignity back.

Draft was taking over the town, brides and bridesmaids celebrating bache- Running out of time lorette parties were confounded by Lukas Bates, 30, of southeastern the crowds. WZTV reported on April England, dreamed big while running 25 that the influx of crazed football the London Marathon on April 28, fans was cramping the style of sever- according to Fox News. In addition to al groups: “We come here to listen to finishing, Bates hoped to secure a Guincountry music, not hang out with foot- ness world record as the fastest runner ball boys,” pouted a bride named Cara. dressed as an iconic building. His cos“I’ll tell you who’s going to pay for this. tume, the tower known as Big Ben in My husband. No football next season,” London, rose several feet above his head threatened a bridesmaid named Cyndi. — and that, it turns out, is what tripped But a bride named Savannah was more him up. As Bates approached the finZen about the situation: “We’re gonna ish line, his costume got caught on the make the best of it. It is what it is.” scoreboard structure overhead. Finally a sympathetic race steward helped Bates free himself and make it over the finish Least competent criminal One way to assure a negative response line in three hours, 54 minutes and 21 to a job application is to lift a few items seconds — missing by only 20 seconds from your prospective employer on the the record held by Richard Mietz, who way out. So it went for an unnamed ran last year’s Berlin Marathon dressed 36-year-old man in Gillette, Wyoming, as Germany’s Holstentor gate. who visited a Sportsman’s Warehouse on April 24, where he paid for some Awesome! items with a rewards card but also left Idahoans embraced the Big Idaho the store with some bullets and a pair of Potato, a 28-foot-long steel-and-plaster sunglasses. Two days later, the Gillette potato constructed in 2012 to mark the News Record reported, the man returned Idaho Potato Commission’s 75th anniand asked to fill out a job application, versary. It’s been traveling the country then walked out with two more pairs of ever since, promoting Idaho’s biggest sunglasses worth $85. This time, work- crop, and the plan was for it to be retired ers called police, who arrested the man this year, when Big Idaho Potato 2.0 and recovered all the stolen items. arrives. But Kristie Wolfe had better idea. The tiny house builder has converted the sculpture into a single-room Inexplicable The Lankenau Medical Center in hotel (aptly called the Big Idaho Potato suburban Philadelphia was the site of Hotel), reported USA Today. It features a break-in on the morning of April 20, a queen bed, two chairs and a bathroom but it was the stolen loot that leaves with a whirlpool and skylight for starus scratching our heads. Two men and gazing; Wolfe lists it on Airbnb for $200 SEACOAST SCENE | MAY 9 - 15, 2019 | PAGE 30

per night. “It’s a way of inviting people to experience Idaho in a unique way,” remarked Frank Muir, CEO of the Idaho Potato Commission.

Smooth reactions

An unnamed Ogden, Utah, woman who accused her boyfriend of cheating added emphasis to the charge in a most unusual manner on April 27, according to a Salt Lake County Jail report. The 23-year-old was with her boyfriend in

the parking lot of a strip mall in Sandy when she “took her clothing off as she accused the boyfriend of cheating. ...

The incident took place in a busy public area with constant vehicle and pedestrian traffic.” KSL reported the woman told police she stripped because “her boyfriend doesn’t want her anymore.”

She was arrested for disorderly conduct and lewdness.

Visit newsoftheweird.com.

PET OF THE WEEK Demi is a lovely 19-year-old quarter horse mare who came the New Hampshire SPCA in Stratham with no previous riding training. Demi is one of two horses currently enrolled in our 90-day “Green to Great” Rescue Horse Challenge in collaboration with the MSPCA at Nevin’s Farm. For the past few months she has been in training at Over the Oxer Equestrian in Dover where they have worked with Demi to get her settled into a busy boarding barn atmosphere and introduced her to riding-related activities. Over the course of 90 days, Demi has proved herself to be an eager learner and is now this sweet girl is officially “under saddle.” For more information, visit our horse and farm animal page at nhspca.org.

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