Seacoast Scene 09-17-20

EAT AT S’MORES HORSESHOE & PORT CAFE P. 11 P. 16 SEPTEMBER 17 – 23, 2020

It’s the perfect time to visit apple orchards and pumpkin patches

INSIDE: HEAR LIVE MUSIC ALL WEEK LONG

A WORD FROM LARRY

Rotary Day This week I want to talk about Rotary Day in Hampton. Have you ever wondered what a Rotary club was all about, or are you interested in joining? Here is your chance! Join us Larry Marsolais on Sept. 24 at The Victoria Inn, 430 High St. in Hampton, from 5 to 8 p.m. for Rotary Day to learn more about Rotary. There will be free hors d’oeuvres and a cash bar, plus five areas of focus on what Hampton Rotary does as a club. This is an outside event under a pavilion and is spread out for social distancing.

Come learn about Rotary! We are your neighbors, your friends and your co-workers. Just for showing up your name will be entered into a raffle draw-

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ing for a $50 gift certificate to The Old Salt restaurant in Hampton. Even though Hampton Rotary is a club, we think of ourselves as an extended family. We do so much for our communities, and when we help others it really feels good!

For more information about Hampton Rotary, attend the event, or go to our website at hamptonrotary.org or call President Larry Marsolais at 603-560-2116.

As always feel free to call me anytime at 603-935-5096 to discuss local issues or to place an ad.

Larry Marsolais is the general manager of the Seacoast Scene and the current president of the Hampton Rotary Club.

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Advertising Staff Larry Marsolais Seacoast Scene General Manager 603-935-5096 larry@seacoastscene.net

Editorial Staff Editor Meghan Siegler msiegler@hippopress.com Editorial Design Tristan Collins Contributors Shane Jozitis, Michael Witthaus, Matt Ingersoll, Angie Sykeny, Jennifer Graham, Jeff Mucciarone, Michelle Pesula Kuegler

Production Tristan Collins, Alex Kusnarowis

Circulation Manager Doug Ladd, 625-1855, Ext. 135 dladd@hippopress.com

COVER STORY 4 All the fall things

PEOPLE & PLACES 8 The coolest Seacoast dwellers and scenes

FOOD 11 Eateries and foodie events

POP CULTURE 18 Books, art, theater and classical

NITE LIFE 19 Music, comedy and more

BEACH BUM FUN

Have an event or a story idea for the Seacoast Scene? Let us know at: editor@seacoastscene.net

20 Puzzles, horoscopes and crazy news

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Seacoast Scene PO Box 961 Hampton NH 03843 603-935-5096 | www.seacoastscene.net

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By Shane Jozitis

It’s the perfect time to visit apple orchards and pumpkin patches

Fall activities like apple- and pumpkin-picking are not canceled, and despite having some new safety protocols in place, local farms are expecting a great season.

Applecrest Farm in Hampton Falls and Cider Hill Farm in Amesbury talked to the Scene about their crops, how the pandemic has affected them, and what you can expect when you visit.

Keeping up at Applecrest

Through a summer of uncertainty and unfavorable weather, Applecrest Farm in Hampton Falls has had “a pretty good

summer overall,” farm owner Todd Wagner said.

In the face of a public health crisis and a water shortage, Wagner said, the farm had to amp up sanitation measures and farming techniques.

“Obviously there’s two major things going on,” Wagner said. “You have the uncertainties and challenges with running a business during this current health crisis. On the farming side, it was a tough summer because we’ve been in a significant drought, which has made it a lot harder for some crops to prosper.”

Even though some crops required

SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 4

more attention this summer, Wagner said the farm was prepared for adversity.

“For the most part it just took a lot more time and energy to manage them and get them to produce at the level we intended, but those are the challenges you always face when you’re farming,” Wagner said. “You just need to pay really close attention. It’s all about timing and tightly managing the resources.

The amount of times you need to water a crop can vary significantly depending on the day, and that varies among everything.”

Farming in good health

While the CDC and state officials became more lenient on Covid-19 restrictions this summer, Applecrest enhanced its sanitation measures to ensure safety for customers. Outdoor cash registers, hand washing stations and mask mandates were implemented at the farm.

“The trend this summer was a general relaxing of restrictions from the CDC and the governor, which was nice,” Wagner said. “But we’re a very public place and people come from all over, so we wanted to remain cautious and even exceed some of

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those guidelines to help flatten the curve.”

Applecrest plans to keep these protocols in place throughout the fall, as they typically get more foot traffic once apple picking is offered.

“Fall is a very different picture for us,” Wagner said. “We get larger volumes of people and higher concentrations depending on the time of day, so we’ve stepped up our protocols.”

Applecrest is asking visitors to wear masks anytime they’re inside of a building, a regulation that most people don’t seem to mind.

“Not everyone loves the masks, but most people seem to understand why we have these restrictions,” Wagner said.

“The good news is we have 200 acres of land for people to spread out on with plenty of sunshine. It’s a fun and enjoyable way for families to get out of the house and put their worries away for an afternoon.”

Applecrest currently plans on holding weekend-long festivals as they’ve done in the past. Typical features of these events include live music, tractor rides and a bounty of fall-themed treats like apple cider doughnuts.

“We are continuing to offer most of the things we’ve offered in past seasons, including our fall festivals,” Wagner said. “We’re still doing great stuff, but with some modifications in place to keep Oma’s corn Don’t forget to grab some corn from the farmstand! Dana Wagner of Applecrest Farm in Hampton Falls shared her recipe for Oma’s corn.

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people safe. The only things we aren’t offering are things like face painting — that one seemed a little too close.”

More areas of the farm are now opened up for people to hand pick items, a modification that Wagner sees as a plus. Overall the Applecrest experience remains intact.

“Besides a few procedural modifications, people can come out and expect what they normally get,” Wagner said.

“We’ve found a nice happy medium between what people expect, without the new rules and protocols damping the experience.”

Apples to apples

Applecrest boasts a wide variety of apples throughout the season, with different types making their debut on the farm stand each week. Early bloomers like Honeycrisp and Gravenstein apples are abundant right now and will be joined by a wider variety in the coming weeks.

“We grow 40 different kinds of apples, and we’re just getting into the height of the season in terms of variety,” Wagner said.

With so many different flavor profiles and uses for cooking, Wagner has a hard time calling a single apple his No. 1.

“I’m particularly fond of Macoun apples, but it’s really hard for me to pick an absolute favorite,” Wagner said. “You

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Applecrest Farm in Hampton Falls. Courtesy photo.

SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 5

Applecrest Farm in Hampton Falls. Courtesy photo.

pick your first Gravenstein of the season, which is a very early apple. It’s small, green, super tart and sour; it’s just a great apple. Then you have your first McIntosh of the season, which is an old standby.

People give Red Delicious apples a bad rap but the ones at Applecrest are phenomenal once those sugars come up after the first frost.”

Apple season is one of the longer seasons for harvesting at the farm, leaving guests an extensive window of opportunity to get out and pick their own.

“We’ve been harvesting apples for a month and will continue to do so for the next month and a half,” Wagner said. “We like to harvest over a long period of time because it gives people more options.”

The apple bounty doesn’t stop at the trees. Applecrest offers a wide array of baked goods for those with a sweet tooth.

“Whatever you can make with an apple, we make from scratch out of our bakery and offer it in the farm stand,” Wagner said.

Typically made with McIntosh and Cortland apples, pie, crisp, scones and turnovers are just the tip of the iceberg in the Applecrest bakery.

“The McIntosh apples offer a really nice sweetness, and the Cortlands hold up really well for baking. That combination gives us great results,” Wagner said.

“With just about everything that we grow, we use on the bakery side to create items that will hold up well.”

The Pumpkin Patch

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SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 6

Whether you’re looking for a canvas for jack-o’-lantern carving or an ingredient for fall-inspired treats, Cider Hill Farm in Amesbury, Mass., has a selection of unique pumpkins that are sure to fit the bill.

“I think the farm used to grow their own pumpkins many moons ago, but we still have our specialty pumpkins,” said Valerie Rosenberg, event and marketing coordinator for Cider Hill. “They’re not your traditional small, orange pumpkins.

Ours are a little more organic and heirloom style. They have beautiful blues and hues of red, and they make for a nice decorative piece.”

Rosenberg says that Cider Hill is geared more toward apple themed treats, but their pumpkin whoopie pies stand as one of the most popular items on the farm stand.

Sweet and Hard Cider

Available at the farm stand and bursting with fall flavors, Cider Hill’s exclusive sweet and hard ciders makes for a perfect accompaniment to the other goodies.

“Ours is 100-percent orchard, meaning Cider Hill personally grows every ingredient that goes into it,” Rosenberg said.

“They’re ingredients that you wouldn’t want to eat by themselves because they can taste sharp and bitter. But once all of those flavor profiles come together, similar to wine making, makes for something spectacular.”

Visitors can get their hands on a batch at the hard cider bar, available Saturdays and Sundays, or at cider hour every other Friday, which typically features live music. Admission to cider hour costs $26, and patrons can indulge in a charcuterie board with flight of summer- and fall-inspired ciders. Cider Hill is currently only allowing 50 guests at this event as requested by the State of Massachusetts. Masks are required in all areas of the farm, and Rosenberg recommends purchasing tickets in advance.

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PEOPLE AND PLACES

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The New Hampshire Department of Education and the Community College System of New Hampshire have created a program that allows high school seniors to earn their diploma and work toward an associate’s degree or certificate simultaneously over the course of two years at no cost to the student. The first New Hampshire Career Academy class consists of 12 students in pursuit of degrees in criminal justice, finance and accounting, culinary arts, cyber security and other fields. Nathaniel Greene, bureau administrator for the Bureau of Educational Opportunities and department liaison for the Career Academy, talked about the new educational opportunity.

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[degree] program just like the othHow does Career Academy work? er community college students do.

It functions kind of like a dual Would they be missing out on enrollment program, except, rather than the student getting their high their high school experience? school diploma with some colWe set up the program so that lege credit, they’ll be enrolled in a students can still take part in the full community college program. normal things they would do as a They’ll do an additional year [of senior in high school. If they want high school] — they’ll be a fifth- Nathaniel Greene to attend their senior prom or paryear senior — and at the end of ticipate in extracurricular activities the program, they’ll come out with at the school, they can do that. … both a high school diploma and a certificate or They wouldn’t necessarily be graduating with associate’s degree from a community college. their [senior] friends since they have to do that fifth year, but we have suggested that schools How is this being funded? let that student participate in the ceremony and We set it up through one of our charter walk with their friends. They’ll just be given a schools, because the state makes payments to a blank diploma and will receive their real diplocharter school, as opposed to traditional public ma after their fifth year. schools, which receive the bulk of their revenue from local property taxes, so we don’t have What are some of the challenges students control over what they do with that money. By should be prepared for? having a student enrolled in a charter school One of the things we stress to students and while taking courses at community college, the parents is that they’re entering an environment state can give the money that it would normally that is not the same as their high school environgive to the charter school to the community col- ment. They’re entering the adult world. They’re lege system instead, to cover the cost of tuition. going to be taking courses with adults, some [of It’s actually the same amount of money that the whom] are in their 30s, 40s or 50s. … Things state would pay for a student to attend a charter aren’t as structured, so there’s going to be more school … so, in effect, there’s no cost to the stu- personal responsibility placed on the student. … dent. … I think that’s the biggest benefit of this There will be some guidance resources, but ... program, by far; it gives our low-income stu- there won’t be access to the same kinds of social dents across the state an opportunity to get their and emotional support and services that exist for associate’s degree. students within a high school.

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What kind of student would be a good fit for this program?

It’s a great option for kids who have already figured out what they want to do and want to fast-track to that next step of getting a certificate or associate’s degree. … I think the kinds of kids who are going to be attracted to a program like this and going to be successful are kids who are interested in academics, self-motivated and responsible … and understand that this is going to be a challenge.

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What will a student’s day look like?

They’ll be enrolled just like any other adult community college student. They’ll attend all of their courses at the community college … including the high school courses they need to get their diploma. … They’ll move through the

How does Career Academy set students up for success?

I think one of the biggest ways is the partnerships we’re creating with the businesses and industries that the students are going into. …

We’re working with the [Health Care] Administrators Association for students coming out with nursing and medical degrees. We’re working with a couple different manufacturing companies for students getting degrees and certificates in mechanical engineering, engineering technology, advanced manufacturing and robotics.

We’re reaching out to accounting associations for students who want to go into the financial field. … The intent is not only to get kids into the programs, but also to connect them with New Hampshire [employers].

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CAR TALK

Get another estimate

By Ray Magliozzi

Dear Car Talk: Should I repair or replace my 2004 BMW 325xi with less than 24,000 miles on it? It’s red and the body and exterior are in excellent condition. But the following repairs have

been suggested: — Replace the power steering reservoir, which is leaking, and flush the system.

— Fix leak in rear differential cover.

— Replace rear brakes (3mm, rotors, sensors).

— Replace original tires.

— Four wheel alignment.

The estimated cost is $7,000. Should I sell it or do the repairs? I’m 75, and I did not get another estimate. — PD

The first thing you should do is lose the address of this repair shop, PD. That sounds, to me, like an outrageous amount of money for that work. I’ll give you an idea of what it would cost in our shop.

Replacing the power steering reservoir and flushing it out should cost a few hundred dollars. Replacing the differential

seal should cost no more than $150. For a four-wheel alignment, let’s say another $150. The rear brakes, being generous, let’s say $700.

And for tires, even if you spent $250 per tire, which is what you’d pay for top of the line performance tires, that’s $1,000. So let’s see. I get $2,300. Even if you went to the dealer, where they charge a premium, that repair order shouldn’t cost more than about $3,500.

So unless you left something out of your letter, the guys you went to are charging you at least double. That puts them in Nigerian Email Scam terrain. So the answer is, if you like the car, PD, and it still serves your needs, you should keep the car, and trade in your mechanic.

If you need help finding a better mechanic, go to www.MechanicsFiles. com. That’s where our readers and listeners have shared the names of mechanics they like and trust. You can search by ZIP code and read the reviews. And then go get another estimate or two. I think that’ll make you feel a lot better, whatever you decide.

Dear Car Talk: I have a 2003 Honda Element EX. I love

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the vehicle. It’s the best vehicle I’ve ever owned (and I have owned 17 cars total).

My wife offered to buy me a new 2011 Element when I turned 40. At the time, I told her my 2003 Element was perfect. The interior has dog hair in the cracks, the dash is scratched from loads of lumber and pipes, it was the car we took on our first date — and it was paid for in full.

Honda stopped making the Element in 2011, and I now regret declining the offer.

My 2003 Element has 197,000 miles on it.

It runs well but burns and leaks oil, and the transmission is slipping. And in 3,000 miles I’m due for a major service. That service and some now necessary repairs will cost me about $4,000.

Or I could buy a 2008 Honda Element EX with only 37,000 miles that has some front-end damage for about $3,000. I think I can fix the 2008 for about $3,500.

Should I keep and fix my trusted and beloved 2003 Element with all the problems I know well, or buy the younger, lower miles Element and sell my current one, which is worth about $3,500 as is?

Thanks. — Bill

Cars are not spouses, Bill. They don’t love you back. Nor do they keep your house. So when it comes to cars, we fully endorse trading for a younger model. Especially in your case. Despite our romantic notions, cars don’t get better

with age. They wear out.

They have a useful life. And for a while, you can replace parts and keep them serviceable. But at some point, they start falling apart faster than you can put them back together. And at that point, the cost becomes prohibitive, even if the inconvenience doesn’t.

And the best measure of useful life?

Mileage. It’s not perfect, because some people beat up their cars with stop and go traffic and potholes, and some people baby their cars on smooth highways.

But generally speaking, a car with lower mileage will have more useful life than a car with higher mileage.

And in your case, it’s not even close.

You’re talking 197,000 miles vs. 37,000 miles. That’s 160,000 fewer miles! Think of it this way: If you were sponsoring a life insurance policy with your own money, would you write one for a 90-year-old or a 20-year-old?

So absolutely grab the 2008 Element with 37,000 miles while you can. And you can either sell your 2003 Element for $3,500 (although with a slipping transmission, good luck), or you can keep it as a parts car. Keeping it as a parts car has a couple of advantages. You’ll still be able to sit in it, breathe in the old car smell and reminisce. And you can take your time transferring over all the old dog hair.

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FOOD

AT HORSESHOE CAFE With a menu of small-batch baked goods and pastries, sandwiches on scratch-made breads, and a variety of hand-selected artisan coffees roasted in house, the Horseshoe Cafe (171 Main St., Newmarket, 292-5280, find them on Facebook @horseshoecafenewmarket) is a spot known for its commitment to local high-quality ingredients. Norihiro Kozuma, who’s originally from Japan, and his wife Sarah of the Kozuma Coffee Co. opened the cafe more than three years ago, after Norihiro became interested in home coffee roasting. The coffees on the menu always rotate, depending on the beans Norihiro gets — some are only available at the cafe for a short amount of time.

Sarah handles the baking side of the business, offering all types of pastries and treats from cinnamon rolls and scones to brownies, cookies and more.

Toasts and sandwiches come on one of two types of bread: either a Frenchstyle country sourdough known as pain au levain, or Hokkaido milk bread.

The Horseshoe Cafe is also one of the only places in New England, according to Sarah, that offers its own Japanese cotton soft cheesecake. Currently the cafe is only open on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, while the Kozumas spend the rest of the week preparing menu items. The Scene recently spoke with Sarah Kozuma about some of her favorite things to bake at the cafe and some of her own must-try recommendations.

How long has the Horseshoe Cafe been a small-batch nano-roaster. Nori is very around? meticulous about the beans he picks.

We just had our three-year anniversary in June, so … [since] 2017.

What is your personal favorite menu item?

What makes the Horseshoe Cafe In terms of the coffee, I will take whatunique? ever my husband makes on that day. It’s I think one of the things that’s really exciting because it always changes. … unique about us is that we stay focused on For baked goods, one of my favorites are staying small and [having] the best quality. the gallettes, which are basically individWe’d rather have less and have everything ual-sized fruit pies. Right now, we’re into be perfect than spread ourselves too thin. peach and apple.

We roast all our own coffee in house with

Photos courtesy of Horseshoe Cafe

What is a menu item that everyone should try?

The egg sandwich. We put it on homemade bread with an organic cheese blend and a housemade red pepper jelly. The way the flavor of it plays with the egg is just perfect. … The egg sandwich is constant, but we’ve had different variations of it on the menu.

what you’re doing. It can’t just be a business venture or a way to make money. It has to be a lifestyle.

What is your favorite thing about being on the Seacoast?

We first came to Newmarket at the suggestion of a friend and we instantly fell in love with it. It’s very much small-town living, but convenient too. It has everything What is an essential skill to running a you’d want in a place to live. cafe?

— Matt Ingersoll I think you really have to care about

SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 11

GARDENS, FARMS AND VINEY Whether picking your own or just picking up, this map will guide you to some of NH’s best agricultural and scenic places- get out and enjoy the bounty!

1. Ancient Fire Mead & Cider Flights, By the Glass & Retail 8030 S Willow St Unit 1-7, Manchester ancientfirewines.com 203-4223 2. Applecrest Farm Farmstand, Pyo, Petting Zoo, Dining, Live Music On Weekends 133 Exeter Rd (Rt. 88), Hampton Falls applecrest.com 926.3721 3. Apple Hill Farm PYO Fruit, Farmstand, Market 580 Mountain Rd, Concord applehillfarmnh.com 224-8862 4. Averill House Vineyard Wine Tasting, Wine Slushies & Icecream, Nh Made Shop 21 Averill Rd, Brookline, NH averillhousevineyard.com 244-3165

5. Brookdale Fruit Farm Pyo Apples & Raspberries, Ice Cream, Baked Goods, Farm Store 41 Broad St, Hollis brookdalefruitfarm.com 465-2240 6. Carter Hill Orchard PYO Fruit, Farmstand, Market 73 Carter Hill Rd, Concord carterhillapples.com 225-2625 7. Concord Farmer’s Market Over 40 Vendors Every Saturday, 8:30-Noon thru Oct. Capitol St, Concord concordfarmersmarket.com 8. Coppal House Farm Corn Maze, Farmstand, Chicken, Meat & Eggs 118 North River Road, Lee nhcornmaze.com 659-3572 9. Elwood Orchard Pyo Apples, 15 Acre Corn Maze, Farmstand 54 Elwood Road, Londonderry elwoodorchards.com 434-6017

10. Grasshoppers Garden Center Garden Center, Landscape, Made in NH Market 728 River Road, New Boston grasshoppersgardencenter.com 497-5788 11. Hermit Woods Wine Tasting, Dining, Shopping 72 Main St, Meredith, NH hermitwoods.com 253-7968 12. J&F Farms 124 Chester Rd, Derry 437-0535 13. Lavoies Farm Hayrides, PYO and Corn Trails 122 Nartoff Rd, Hollis lavoiesfarm.com 882-0072 14. Mack’s Apples U-Pick Apples and Pumpkins, Walking Trails and Picnicking by Our Ponds 230 Mammoth Rd, Londonderry macksapples.com 434-7619

LEBANON

16

17

15. McLeod Orchards PYO Apples, Farmstand 735 N River Rd, Milford mcleodorchards.com 673-3544 16. Poverty Lane Orchards & Farnum Hill Hard Ciders Apples PYO & Ready-Picked, Farm-Stand, Picnic Tables, Bring your masks!

98 Poverty Lane, Lebanon povertylaneorchards.com farnumhillciders.com 448-1511 17. Riverview Farm PYO Apples, Raspberries & pumpkins, Corn Maze, Barn store 141 River Road, Plainfield riverviewnh.com 298-8519 18. Sullivan Farm PYO Apples 70 Coburn Ave, Nashua 595-4560 19. Sunnycrest Farm, Inc. 59 High Range Rd, Londonderry 432-7753

20. Trombly Gardens Corn Maze, Ice Cream, Farmstand, PYO Pumpkins 150 N River Rd, Milford tromblygardens.net 673-0647 21. Washburns Windy Hill Orchard Corn maze, PYO apples, cider donuts, baked goods, ice cream 66 Mason Rd Greenville fb.com/washburnswindyhill (603) 878-2101 22. Winnipesaukee Winery & 1810 House Wine Tasting, Wine Slushies, Antiques Shop, Dining 458 Center St, Wolfeboro winniwinery.com 515-1765 23. Zorvino Vineyards Winery/Vineyard, Wedding Venue, Shopping 226 Main Street, Sandown Zorvino.com 887-8463

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FOOD

TRY THIS AT HOME Caramelized Onion & Bacon Mini Tarts

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I am amazed at how a small amount of cooking can transform an ingredient.

Take an onion. If I offered you a serving of raw onion you’d probably decline, understandably. However, place that raw onion in a frying pan with a little olive oil over a low heat and it becomes this unctuous, flavorful item. A serving of caramelized onion? Yes, please.

When I was creating this recipe I considered using just the caramelized onion as the filling but decided to go for more flavor and texture. Enter crispy bacon. Crispy bacon is the perfect foil for caramelized onions. As the onions lean toward sweet, the bacon balances that with its saltiness. While the onions are tender, the bacon is full of crunch.

Combined, they provide all sorts of stimulation for your palate.

But wait, there’s more! At the bottom of each tart is the tiniest smear of cream cheese. It is so little that you may wonder why it is added. The answer is simple: more texture. Now you have creamy, tender and crunchy. Finally, there’s a drizzle of maple syrup on the top of each tart. It’s just enough to add a tiny bit more sweetness to round out the dish.

These tarts are small. I suppose they could be considered one-bite, but in actuality they’re two to four bites, depending

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on the diner. This recipe makes a dozen tarts. Think wisely about how many people you offer to share them with. You may need to double the recipe, as you’re definitely going to want more than one.

Michele Pesula Kuegler has been thinking about food her entire life. Since 2007, the New Hampshire resident has been sharing these food thoughts and recipes at her blog, Think Tasty. Please visit thinktasty.com to find more of her recipes.

reduce heat to low.

Simmer for 10 minutes, then remove from heat.

Dice or crumble bacon into small pieces.

Combine bacon with onion in its pan.

4 strips thick cut bacon Reduce oven to 350°F. 1/2 tablespoon olive oil Using a 3- to 4-inch biscuit cutter, cut 12 2 1/2 cups sliced sweet onion rounds out of tortillas.

2 tablespoons maple syrup, divided Spray one side with nonstick spray or 4-6 tortillas or wraps 2 ounces cream cheese, softened brush with oil and push tortilla rounds into a muffin pan. (optional) Bake for 8 minutes.

Black pepper Remove from oven.

Place 1 teaspoon of cream cheese in botPreheat oven to 400 degrees. tom of each cup.* Bake bacon for 10 minutes, then flip.

Bake for another 10 minutes or until Add heaping tablespoon of bacon and onion mixture to each cup. very crisp.

Remove bacon from oven, and drain on Return to oven, and bake for 2 minutes.

Remove from oven, and d rizzle remaina paper towel-lined plate.

While bacon is cooking, heat large non- ing tablespoon of maple syrup over cups stick frying pan over medium-low heat. and season with black pepper.

Add olive oil and onions. *Remove cup from pan to make it easier Sauté for 10 minutes.

Add 1 tablespoon maple syrup, and to spread cream cheese.

Caramelized Onion & Bacon Mini Tarts Makes 12

Casual Seafood Dining in a warm New England Setting

Caramelized Onion & Bacon Mini Tarts. Photo by Michele Pesula Kuegler.

FOOD

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COCKTAILS The Jungle Bird He stumbled in off the street, leaving the dust and noise behind.

“Afternoon, Mr. Peterson. The usual?”

“Hi, Charlie. I think I need The Bird, today.”

Charlie mixed the drink and slid it to Peterson without a word. He knew from long experience that on days like this, words were like razors to the older man.

Peterson stared at the pink depths of his drink for a minute, then for a minute longer, then closed his eyes and took a long pull.

For a moment — just the fraction of a breath — he was back in Kuala Lumpur. He didn’t even remember her name anymore.

All he had ... was this.

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The Jungle Bird. Photo by John Fladd.

that I don’t spill the juice on my way to the freezer. Because it’s made of silicone, I can easily pop each pre-measured pineapple puck into a zip-close bag for future use without it sticking to the mold like it might in a traditional, metal ice cube tray. Just make sure to thaw your juice before adding it to your cocktail; frozen juice won’t melt any faster than the ice in your shaker and might throw your drink proportions off (30 seconds in the microwave is just about perfect to melt two ounces).

The Jungle Bird was first created at a luxury hotel in Kuala Lumpur* in the 1970s as a welcome drink for arriving guests. It is often referred to as a tiki drink, but I think that is a bit misleading. Yes, this cocktail is built around rum and fruit — in this case, the classic combination of pineapple and lime — but it isn’t at all kitschy; it has an elegance about it. It dances on the edge of being almost too The Jungle Bird sweet, but is pulled back from the brink at Ingredients: the last moment by the addition of Campa• 1½ ounces dark rum – preferably ri, which adds bitterness and emphasizes the Myers’s or Pusser’s alcoholic taste of the rum. It announces to • ¾ ounce Campari the world, in a quiet way, that you have hid• ½ ounce simple syrup den depths.

• 1½ ounces pineapple juice (* The capital of Malaysia. I had to look • ½ ounce fresh lime juice it up.)

Pour all ingredients over ice in a cocktail shaker, including the spent half of a lime that A brief rant about pineapple juice: is left over from juicing it. (Why? I feel like In theory, you could juice your own pine- it adds depth to the fruit flavor in the backapple, and if you were to find yourself ground of the drink. Can I prove it? Not even somewhere with a ready supply of great, remotely.) fresh pineapples, that would be an excellent Shake the cocktail until it is very cold. idea. But for most of us the most consistent You will know that it is cold enough when and convenient source of pineapple juice is the outside of your shaker isn’t just wet with from a can. That’s fine. There’s no shame condensation but visibly frosts and your in canned pineapple juice — except per- hands start to burn with the cold. Pain is the haps from a historical colonial perspective, price you pay for excellence. but let’s set that aside for the moment — but Pour into a rocks glass, discarding the there is a problem with it. Most cans of pine- lime rind, which at this point has given apple juice are enormous — generally 46 everything it has to this operation. ounces. Even if you think ahead enough to Historical purists will tell you to garnish buy a six-pack of tiny six-ounce cans of it, a Jungle Bird with pineapple fronds carved six ounces of pineapple juice is enough for into the shape of a bird. I feel like that was four Jungle Birds, which means that either appropriate in the lobby of the Kuala Lumyou are blessed with friends or you’ve set- pur Hilton, but is a bit too precious for tled in for the evening. anywhere less exotic. Drink it ungarnished.

I get around this by using a silicone baby Peterson would not tolerate a paper food freezer tray — basically an ice cube umbrella. tray designed to allow parents to freeze neat one-ounce pucks of baby food for future use.

John Fladd is a father, writer and cocktail Mine came with a snap-on lid, which means enthusiast living in New Hampshire.

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It may not officially be fall, but in some places the trees are beginning to blush and the evenings are now calling for jeans and sweatshirts. The air is crisp and “pick your own” ventures have changed from berries to apples. It is a beautiful time of the year and the perfect time to relish those opportunities to gather around a campfire or backyard firepit after the sun goes down. Break out the graham crackers, marshmallows and Hershey chocolate bars and create that sublime evening treat. And what do we want to sip with such fare? Port, of course!

Port is the perfect drink to pair with fruit, cheese and everything in between — even s’mores! Port can stand on its own, sipped slowly, bundled up while gathered around the firepit in the backyard. Port is a fortified wine at 20 percent alcohol. It is simply wine produced from grapes that are fermented, with the addition of some spirits, typically brandy, which stops the fermentation process. Port is produced wherever wine is made, including the United States, Australia, India, Argentina, Canada, and South America, but authentic port is unique to Portugal.

It all started over the wars that the British and French were constantly engaged in. The British needed a source outside of France for their table wines. They turned to Portugal, but these wines were unstable and not favored as much as the French wines. It was already a common practice to add some spirits to lesser wines to fortify the mixture to extend its life while traveling; wines like Madeira come to mind. Port wine takes its name from the city of Oporto, where the Douro River meets the Atlantic. The Douro River valley was and still is known as the home of some great vineyards upriver, and these grapes along with the added brandy give port wine its unique flavor. In fact, only Portuguese-made port can carry the identifying term “Porto” on the label. And, as is obvious from reading the labels on the bottles, the British became involved in the exportation and sale of this marvelous product, hence the port labels of Taylor, Warres, Graham’s and others!

Port is a red wine, with one notable exception — white port, which is made from white grapes. Ruby port is a young, inexpensive wine, deep red in color and aged for only about three years. Vintage port is a blended harvest, placed in oak casks for several months, then bottled and aged for 20 or more years. Late bottled vintage port is made from grapes grown in a specific year, aged in oak for four to six years, then bottled. Tawny port with a reddish-brown color is aged in casks for several years, some for up to 40 years! Port wine labels carry a lot of infor-

mation, so much so that an entire column could be devoted to it.

But let us begin our tasting of port wines!

Taylor Fladgate 2014 Late Bottled Vintage Port (originally priced at $19.99 and reduced to $16.99 at the New Hampshire Liquor & Wine Outlets) has a beautiful ruby-colored rim sitting atop a deep purple-black body. On the nose there are rich jam-like notes of currants and blackberries, along with light spice. To the tongue, the same fruit comes through with light tannins of leather, followed by a long finish. This is a superlative “entry-level” port at an appealing price. According to the Taylor Fladgate website, it is blended from some of the best ports produced from the 2014 harvest. By all accounts this is a young port that has been in oak casks for six years and is ready to drink now.

Our second port is Taylor Fladgate 10 Year Old Tawny Porto (originally priced at $27.99, and reduced to $24.99 at the New Hampshire Liquor & Wine Outlets). It has a slight amber cast to its rich reddish brown color. To the nose there are notes of dried cherries and hazelnuts, all coming from its time within oak casks. It is ripe, rich and full to the mouth, with a silky palate of chocolate and butterscotch. Its long finish is to be savored.

So bundle up, light those firepits, roast some marshmallows to make s’mores, and savor these wonderful ports made for these moments. Pick up a bottle of each and send your reviews to the Hippo!

Fred Matuszewski is a local architect and a foodie and wine geek, interested in the cultivation of the multiple strains and varieties of grapes and the industry of wine production and sales. Chief among his travels is an annual trip to the wine-producing areas of California.

FILM REVIEWS BY AMY DIAZ

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MINUTES FROM THE BEACH

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OPEN AT 4:00 MON-FRI OPEN AT 2:00 SAT & SUN Mulan

Mulan (PG-13)

A young woman becomes a warrior in Mulan, a very pretty, vaguely unsatisfying live-action remake of Disney’s 1998 animated movie.

From the time she is a little girl, the Force is strong with Mulan (Liu Yifei), who is expected to do girly things like be calm and put up with the matchmaker but would prefer to ride horses and sword fight. Her father (Tzi Ma) sees that Mulan has a strong life force (treated here as near superhuman agility and dexterity) but tells her to hide it because these skills aren’t something anybody has on their wifequalities wish list.

But then invaders attack the empire and the emperor (Jet Li) tells his army to conscript one man from every family. This means Mulan’s dad must march into battle, since his only children are Mulan and her sister (Xana Tang). Mulan’s mother (Rosalind Cho) tells the girls that their father, who still has a leg injury from his previous military service, won’t live through this battle, so Mulan takes his sword and his armor and sneaks off herself, posing as a boy and immediately volunteering for nighttime guard duty so she can avoid showering with the guys, especially friend and competitor Honghui (Yoson An).

The invaders they’re training to fight are led by Bori Khan (Jason Scott Lee), a jerk, and Xianniang (Li Gong), a witch who is helping Bori Khan despite the fact that he is a super jerk to her, a witch, with all sorts of powers that would seem to make Bori Khan unnecessary to her goals.

And as I’m writing this, “super-soldier versus witch” sounds like a fun fantasy action tale but that pared down description is way more interesting than the movie we are given.

Mulan is beautiful to look at — eye-catching color and detail-rich when it comes to costumes, cinematography and production design. There are so many moments when I was ignoring the story and just taking in the shot of the Imperial City or a lone rider in the desert. This movie’s visuals are Oscar-worthy work and it will be interesting to see if

top shelf work that went the home viewing distribution route gets the same award season consideration as theatrical releases.

Mulan’s visuals and my total lack of a connection to the 1998 animated movie probably resulted in my enjoying the experience of watching this movie more than I would based on story alone. This movie reminded me a bit of 2017’s Beauty and the Beast, where you could feel it trying to update-for-2020 elements of the story with mixed results. Mulan pushes romance to the very edge of the story (which is fine) and sets up a theme of “take your place” versus “know your place,” a promising idea that at times is presented clunkily, as though there is still some first-draft-iness that needs to be worked out.

Xianniang and Mulan become the center of the story’s struggle and they meet a few times and trade extremely straightforward dialogue on their respective motivations. I feel like the movie hadn’t totally figured out what it wanted to say with these two characters and their different (sort of?) approaches to being powerful women in a man’s world. The result is an arc for Mulan that feels underwhelming and not as well developed as I’d expect for such an established character.

That said, the viewers Mulan is meant for (probably kids of about age 10 to 15 or 16; Common Sense Media gives it an age 11+) will be getting a decent, non-gory action movie in exchange for their $30. Liu Yifei is a solid enough lead who carries off the acrobatics of her fight scenes well; they are probably the most joyful scenes of the movie. And, while not quite the experience of seeing, say, a battlefield avalanche on the big screen, the movie is visually stunning enough to transcend even the limitations of a medium-sized TV. BRated PG-13 for sequences of violence, according to the MPA on filmratings.com.

Directed by Niki Caro with a screenplay by Rick Jaffa & Amanda Silver and Elizabeth Martin & Lauren Hynek, Mulan is an hour and 55 minutes long and distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures via Disney+, where it costs $29.99 for subscribers.

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SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 17

POP CULTURE BOOKS

Here She Is, by Hilary Levey Friedman (Beacon Press, 225 pages) Mark Zuckerberg, as it turns out, wasn’t the first entrepreneur to gather pictures of women and ask people to rate them. That distinction belongs to P.T. Barnum, the 19th-century showman.

In 1854, not long after he started his National Poultry Show, Barnum proposed a contest that would judge America’s “Handsomest Lady.” That didn’t get much traction, so the next year he launched the “American Gallery of Female Beauty,” a collection of daguerreotypes (the first, crude forms of photographs) that he believed would show that “specimens of American beauty will compare favorably with any that the Old World can produce.”

The pictures would be displayed at Barnum’s New York museum and visitors would vote to decide who was the most beautiful.

Alas, we will never know the winner, since the images were destroyed by a fire that viewers of the movie The Greatest Showman will remember. But as Hilary Levey Friedman writes in Here She Is, a history of the Miss America Pageant, Barnum had a sizable hand in what would evolve to be pageant culture in America (if not “The Facebook”).

Friedman, a sociologist at Brown University, comes naturally to the topic, having grown up steeped in pageant culture. Her mother, Pamela Eldred, was Miss America in 1970, and shelves in their home contained not just books but crowns. She remembers reading books in the audience as a child while her mother was emceeing pageants or judging them. Friedman, however, was not a contestant; she writes frankly of not being “pageant material.”

“Like most nine-year-olds in the 1980s, I was in desperate need of orthodontia and perhaps some better corrective eyewear. But I would have been able to overcome these (temporary) impediments had I been physically

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beautiful — which I am not.”

Still, she says “sequins and rhinestones were in my DNA” and she loved pageantry, and especially the Miss America Pageant, which celebrates its 100th anniversary next year.

Rather than being a wholesale denigration of women, beauty pageants, she argues “trace the arc of feminism.”

It’s easy to heap criticism upon pageants and the women and girls who compete in them. “Yet, winning means something,” Friedman says. “Many dismiss beauty pageant contestants, until someone they know wins.”

Few, of course, do. Just 92 women and girls have been Miss America (the first two winners were 16); it is said that parents are more likely to have a son win the Super Bowl than to have a daughter become Miss America. But pageants are intimately entwined with American history in the past 100 years, in surprising ways.

Take the “Miss Whatever” sash, for example. Friedman explains that sashes were borrowed from parades advocating for women’s suffrage, which in turn borrowed them from the military. They may seem silly today, but they have noble origins. And “Miss America” itself is a much more respectable title than some of the earliest pageants; be grateful we no longer have an International Pageant of Pulchritude or baby parades, which later gave way to a “Juvenile Review,” judging of specimens of children over the age of 5. In 1932 the Pennsylvania State Board of Health had to condemn this “deplorable exploitation of childhood,” but baby pageants and parades continued in force until a polio outbreak in 1950 slowed them down.

You can’t talk about child pageants without thinking of JonBenet Ramsey, the Colorado child found murdered in her basement in 1996 just weeks after having been crowned “Little Miss Christmas.” Although child pageants

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had existed throughout the century, it was this child’s death that made the nation horrified by them. JonBenet became a “reverse ambassador” for child beauty pageants (even though she herself had just participated in 10 pageants).

Though an admitted fan of pageants in general, Friedman also describes herself a third-wave feminist, and she is sober in her assessments, writing, “I have found, like most parents, child beauty pageant moms seem to have the best intentions for their daughters’ long-term success in life. But those intentions come with a high price tag and lasting implications.”

Friedman also casts a skeptical eye on the promotion of pageants as launching pads for professional success. While it’s true that the Miss America organization has been the larg-

est provider of scholarship money for young women since the 1940s, the winners have not (yet) become neurosurgeons, jet pilots, investigative journalists, coders and CEOs, as promotional material for the 2020 pageant (canceled, of course) imply. “No recent Miss America winners have done any of those things professionally,” Friedman writes, adding that “this brings into stark reality that it is unclear how Miss America is preparing the world for great women.”

Hers is a refreshing take on a surprisingly complicated story, and Friedman is an engaging writer and serious thinker who frames the history of Miss America in a portrait that even people uninterested in beauty pageants can enjoy. A — Jennifer Graham

BOOK NOTES A new children’s book called Yorick and Bones (HarperAlley, 144 pages) stirs thought about how many books have been published under the influence of Shakespeare, and also about the phenomenon of parent authors who write books with their children.

Yorick and Bones, comically billed as “The Lost Graphic Novel by William Shakespeare,” is written and illustrated by Jeremy Tankard (author of the Grumpy Birds series) with his daughter Hermione. It’s about a dog that digs up a skeleton, Yorick, that has been animated by a spilled magic potion that seeped underground.

Yorick, Shakespeare fans might recall, is the court jester in “Hamlet” whose skull is exhumed in Act 5. (“Alas, poor Yorick!

I knew him, Horatio, a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy!”)

At first the skeleton is thrilled about being freed from the earth; he has been longing for friends, and for a sausage. But there is a potential problem: the dog, of course, wants bones to eat. It is a delicious story made even more appetizing by the fact that it is written — because all genius has a touch of madness — in iambic pentameter, because why not? Not being age 8 through 12, and not having

children this age, I’m not the target audience for this book, but I still want to read it and many sequels. Here’s hoping the dog finds other skeletons to dig up.

As for other Shakespeare-inspired books, there are at least three others this year: Christopher Moore’s Shakespeare for Squirrels, reviewed here last month (William Morrow, 288 pages), James Shapiro’s Shakespeare in a Divided America: What His Plays Tell Us About Our Past and Future (Penguin, 320 pages), and Kathryn Harkup’s Death by Shakespeare, Snakebites, Stabbings and Broken Hearts (Bloomsbury Sigma, 368 pages).

For parent-child collaborations, what comes first to mind is Stephen King and Joe Hill’s short story “Throttle,” and novelist Lisa Scottoline and her daughter Francesca Serritella, who have written five humorous books together.

There is, of course, also Mary Higgins Clark, who writes with her daughter Carol Higgins Clark, and closer to home, New Hampshire’s Jodi Picoult, who has written two books with her daughter Samantha van Leer.

As for Shakespeare, he reportedly had three children, none of whom authored any books of which we know.

— Jennifer Graham

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Thursday, Sept. 17 Epping Holy Grail: Halfway to St. Patrick’s Day celebration, 4 p.m.

Telly’s: Pete Peterson, 7 p.m.

Exeter Sawbelly: Todd Hearon, 5 pm. (acoustic) Sea Dog: Chad Verbeck, 6 p.m.

Hampton Bernie’s: MB Padfield, 7 p.m. (main stage) CR’s: Rico Barr Duo, 6 p.m.

The Goat: Dave Perlman, 9 p.m.

Smuttynose: open mic with Max Sullivan, 6 p.m.

Wally’s: Chris Toler, 7 p.m.

Kingston Saddle Up Saloon: karaoke with DJ Jason Whitney, 7 p.m.

Laconia T-Bones: Mitch Alden, 6 p.m.

Newmarket Stone Church: Wendy Jo Girven, 6 p.m.

Portsmouth Cisco: Brisket & Blues with Paul Nelson, 4 p.m.

Gas Light: Lewis Goodwin, 7:30 p.m.

The Goat: Isaiah Bennett, 9 p.m.

The Striker: Matt Luneau, 9 p.m.

Rochester 110 Grill: Austin Pratt, 6 p.m.

Governor’s Inn: Amanda Dane Band, 6 p.m (groovin’ rock) Revolution: karaoke with DJ Dave, 7:30 p.m.

Friday, Sept. 18 Epping Holy Grail: Dan Walker, 7 p.m.

Telly’s: ON2, 7 p.m.

Seabrook Chop Shop: One Fine Mess, 7 p.m.

Stratham Tailgate: Irish Whiskey Duo, 7 p.m.

Saturday, Sept. 19 Epping Holy Grail: April Renzella, 7 p.m.

Railpenny Tavern: Artty Francoeur, 10 a.m. (blues brunch with a side of bluegrass) Tellys’: Troy & Lueau, 7 p.m.

Exeter Sawbelly: Chad Verbeck, 5 p.m.

Hampton Bernie’s: MB Padfield, 1 p.m.; Adam Lufkin Band, 8 p.m.

The Goat: Rob Pagnano, 9 p.m.

McGuirk’s: Pourmen, 8 p.m.

Sea Ketch: Clint LaPointe, 12:30 p.m.

Smuttynose: Malcolm Salls, 1 p.m.

Wally’s: Chris Toler, 3 p.m.

Kingston Saddle Up: Karma, 9 p.m.

Newmarket Stone Church: San Souci, 6 p.m.

(Jerry Garcia Band tribute) Portsmouth The Goat: Alex Anthony, 9 p.m.

The Statey: Woodland Protocol, 8 p.m.

The Striker: Max Sullivan, 7 p.m.; Tom Boisse, 9 p.m.

Rochester Governor’s Inn: Rob and Jody, 7 p.m. (favorite hits) Seabrook Chop Shop: WildFire, 6:30 p.m.

Exeter Sawbelly: Max Sullivan, 2 p.m.; Green Heron, 5 p.m.

Sunday, Sept. 20 Exeter Sawbelly: Dub Boat, 3 p.m.

Hampton CR’s: Rico Barr Duo, 6 p.m.

The Goat: Rob Pagnano, 9 p.m.

Instabar: Emily Rae, 6 p.m.

Smuttynose: Mica Peterson Duo, 6:30 p.m.

Tino’s: Max Sullivan, 7 p.m.

Wally’s: Adam Lufkin, 8 p.m.

WHYM: Jodee Frawlee, 5 p.m.

Hampton CR’s: Gary Beaudoin, 4 p.m.

The Goat: Isaiah Bennett, 9 p.m.

Instabar: Brad Bosse, noon; Dave Corson, 6 p.m.

Sea Ketch: Ray Zerkle, 1 p.m.

Smuttynose: Troy & Luneau, 1 p.m.

Wally’s: MB Padfield, 2 p.m.; Adam Lufkin, 6 p.m.

Newmarket Stone Church: Honey Bees Trio, 6 p.m.

Portsmouth Gas Light: Matt Luneau, 12:30 p.m.

The Goat: Chris Toler, 9 p.m.

The Striker: Tim Theriault, 7 p.m.; Dave Gerard, 9 p.m.

Rochester Governor’s Inn: Texas Pete Band, 7 p.m. (country/Southern rock)

Newmarket Stone Church: open mic with Dave Ogden, 5 p.m.

Portsmouth Gas Light: Andrew Geano, 2 p.m.

The Goat: Rob Pagnano, 9 p.m.

The Striker: Pete Peterson, 7 p.m.

Rochester 110 Grill: Michael Scharff, 3 p.m.

Monday, Sept. 21 Hampton Bernie’s: Citizen Cope, 7 p.m.

The Goat: Shawn Theriault, 9 p.m.

Instabar: Max Sullivan, 6 p.m.

Portsmouth Gas Light: Joanie Cicatelli, 7:30 p.m.

The Goat: Alex Anthony, 9 p.m.

Tuesday, Sept. 22 Hampton The Goat: Rob Pagnano, 9 p.m.

Instabar: Dave Corson, 6 p.m.

Wally’s: Chris Toler, 7 p.m.

Newmarket Stone Church: Darien Castro, 6 p.m.

Portsmouth Gas Light: Brad Bosse, 7:30 p.m.

The Goat: Isaiah Bennett, 9 p.m.

Stratham Tailgate: Musical Bingo Nation, 6:30 pm.

Wednesday, Sept. 23 Exeter Sawbelly: Soul Walker Wednesdays, 5 p.m. (reggae) Hampton The Goat: Dave Perlman, 9 p.m.

Wally’s: Chris Toler, 7 p.m.

Smoky Quartz Distillery 894 Lafayette Road (Rte. 1) Seabrook, NH 03874

(603) 474-4229 • smokyqd.com facebook.com/smokyquartzdistillery Located on Route 1 in Seabrook, NH. We are an artisan ‘grain to glass’ craft distillery using only the highest quality ingredients to distill truly exceptional “Small Batch” spirits.

SMOKY QUARTZ DISTILLERY H A S B E E N AWA R D E D

2018 NH DISTILLERY OF THE YEAR

BY THE NH LIQUOR COMMISSION

Newmarket Stone Church: Tyler Allgood, 6 p.m.

Portsmouth The Goat: Alex Anthony, 9 p.m.

The Striker: Michael Troy, 7 p.m.; Don Severance, 9 p.m.

Thursday, Sept. 24 Epping Railpenny: The Bulkheadz, 5 p.m. (acoustic) Telly’s: Dave Gerard, 7 p.m.

Local grain. American made.

Smokey Quartz is a Veteran Owned Distillery Visit us and tour our distillery in person & enjoy a complimentary sample of our Vodka, Whiskeys and Rum.

Hampton CR’s: Don Severance, 6 p.m.

The Goat: Dave Perlman, 9 p.m.

Smuttynose: open mic with Max Sullivan, 6 p.m.

Wally’s: Chris Toler, 7 p.m.

Kingston Saddle Up Saloon: karaoke with DJ Jason Whitney, 7 p.m.

Newmarket Stone Church: The JG3, 6 p.m. (acoustic trio) Portsmouth Gas Light: Matt Luneau, 7:30 p.m.

The Goat: Isaiah Bennett, 9 p.m.

Rochester Governor’s Inn: Marcy Drive, 6 p.m. (five-piece cover band)

Available for purchase at our location, NH liquor stores, or your favorite bar or restaurant!

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SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 19

BEACH BUM FUN HOROSCOPES All quotes are from Chuck Amuck: The only say ‘no’ finds it an eternity. NegativeLife and Times of an Animated Cartoonist, by minded people have been known to finally inflate and burst with accumulated negatives Chuck Jones, born Sept. 21, 1912. and say something positive, because it is also Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) Having blown true that a person who heretofore can only out the candles … I was handed the knife … say ‘no’ is also a person who must say someand was told to cut as large a piece as I liked. thing. Yes! At this point Daffy Duck must have had, for Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) … as Mel canme, his earliest beginnings, because I found to not be expected to talk convincingly to himself, my surprise and pleasure that I had no desire we recorded one voice at a time. Taking turns to share my cake with anyone. ‘What would can be helpful.

Daffy do?’ is not your best approach.

Aries (March 21 – April 19) ‘Where do Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) Daffy Duck is to you get your ideas?’ This is the most common a Buck Rogers story what John McEnroe was question asked by would-be animators, writers, to tennis. directors. … I am grateful to be able to answer Be who you want to be in your sport. the question sincerely and honestly: I don’t Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) You must, if know where ideas come from. One idea leads to you ever would pretend to artistry, respect another. your medium; be it a blank piece of paper or Taurus (April 20 – May 20) RULE 1. THE canvas, an untouched bar sheet, an uncarved ROAD RUNNER CANNOT HARM THE COYpiece of stone, or an unexposed frame of film. OTE EXCEPT BY GOING ‘BEEP-BEEP!’ What does it want?

Know where your power is.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) One of Gemini (May 21 – June 20) [On] Saturday the oddities of the writers at Warner Bros. morning, turn off the sound of the Bugs BunCartoons was that they did not write; they ny show and note that you can tell pretty much translated their ideas through drawings…. what is happening. Sometimes muting is an Communication takes a variety of forms. instructive option.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) One fateCancer (June 21 – July 22) … the truth is, ful day our family moved into a rented house, I make cartoons for me. … In my more intellecfurnished with a complete set of Mark Twain, tual youth I tried studying audiences — making and my life changed forever. … I first became notes and timing laughs and applause. And the interested in the Coyote while devouring Mark more I learned about audiences, the worse my Twain’s Roughing It at the age of seven. Inspi- cartoons grew. Do it for you.

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) If you make a fool of ration happens.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) The ‘yes’ yourself in front of a cat, he will sneer at you…. session imposes only one discipline: the abo- If you make a fool of yourself in front of a dog, lition of the word ‘no.’ … The ‘yes’ session he will make a fool of himself, too. Your audilasts only for two hours, but a person who can ence may include both.

For family fun meet us at the Community Oven!

The Community Oven Wood Fire Pizza & More

Serving Lunch & Dinner Monday-Sunday 11-close (603) 601-6311 | thecommunityoven.com 845 Lafayette Rd. Hampton, NH | 24 Brickyard Square, Epping, NH

SUDOKU

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column, and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. Answers will appear in next week's paper.

9/10

61 High St, Hampton, NH (603) 601-7091 Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner 7 days a week - 7AM

ORDER ONLINE! Find us on ToastTab.com SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 20

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BEACH BUM FUN ROCKANDROLLCROSSWORDS.com BY TODD SANTOS

GOT A PUZZLE, FACT I’VE GOT TWO Across 1. You play these watering holes when starting out 5. Ob-La-Di-, __ (hyph) 11. Replacements ‘85 ‘Dose Of Thunder’ album named after film director Burton?

14. What even the youngest star does 15. Nate Ruess label __ By Ramen 16. Ravonettes love the City Of Angels to wrote an ‘__ To L.A.’ 17. ‘89 Biz Markie smash (4,1,6) 19. Roll-call vote for new manager that is not nay 20. ‘Goody Two Shoes’ singer’s bandmate?

21. A sad Temptations wrote ‘Since I

__ My Baby’ 22. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club was broke so they ‘Took Out A __’ 23. ‘02 Nine Inch Nails double album ‘And __ Have Been’ (3,4,5) 27. Grammy-winning slide guitarist Trucks 29. Pearl Jam “One, two, three, __, five against one” 30. Ataris wrote the song ‘In This __’ for their discreet record book 31. Cream “In the __ __ with black curtains near the station” (5,4) 36. Was VHS’ nemesis for concert flicks 37. Paper Lace saw disaster and sang

‘Billy, Don’t Be’ this! (1,4) 38. Faces ‘__ __ Is As Good As A Wink To A Blind Horse’ (1,3 39. Ben E. King classic that John Lennon covered & Rob Reiner named his ‘86 film after (5,2,2) 41. ‘Spin Spin Sugar’ Sneaker __ 42. Electronic ‘Swamp Thing’ band named after usage to define location on a map 43. Billy Paul ‘Me And Mrs __’ 44. Panic! At The Disco took a 26. Down from ‘Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds’ with ‘__ Eyes’ 49. Guns N’ Roses ‘__ N’ The Bedouins’ 50. Alice In Chains ‘Down In A __’ 51. Quad City __ ‘C’mon N’ Ride It (The Train)’ 54. Universal Music Group (abbr) 55. Kat Deluna told her trainer “Don’t stop until you __” (4,2,5) 59. Bob Dylan asked us to ‘__ That My Grave Is Kept Clean’ 60. What Sepultera’s ‘91 album had done from the ashes, perhaps 61. Mexican ‘El Verdadero Amor Perdona’ band 62. Pearl Jam “Laid spread out before

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me as __ body once did” 63. John Denver went to this hearing 64. AC/DC “Shake __ __, get stuck in” (1,3) Down 1. ‘96 Chris Isaak album had ‘Sessions’ on this Mexican peninsula 2. Pearl Jam “Got __ __, fact I got two” (1,3) 3. Namelessnumberheadman ‘__ Assured’ 4. One time Hüsker Dü label 5. Jim James played in supergroup Monsters __ __ (2,4) 6. Your favorite jam might give you a quick this of energy 7. Daisy Chainsaw’s Belinda 8. Green Day grabs a pint of a ‘Private’ one 9. Recording studio might feel like a cave after a while or this 10. System Of A Down song off ‘Steal This Album’ for attention deficit disorder?

11. Heart ‘All I Wanna Do Is Make Love __ __’ (2,3) 12. Like consummate rehearsal space 13. Kris Kristofferson ‘__ __ Bobby McGee’ (2,3) 18. Stevie Ray Vaughan ‘Tin Pan __’ 22. Scottish singer McIntosh of Deacon Blue 23. What producer did to scattered song parts before recording 24. Crooked Fingers told the campers ‘You Must Build __ __’ (1,4) 25. ‘Hold The Line’ rockers 26. Choreographer will give you this from side-stage to clue you in on the next move 27. Might go on Adkins one, pre-tour 28. 1972’s ‘__ __ Peach’ by Allman Brothers

30. Linkin Park’s Chester Bennington’s side project Dead By Sunrise (abbr) 31. Violent Femmes asked ‘__ __ Birds Sing?’ (3,2) 32. ‘Rabbit Songs’ band that is haw’s partner?

33. Pearl Jam debut ‘Vs.’ single “Please don’t go __ __” (2,2) 34. What Britney Spears says when she slips and falls 35. 80s R&Bers Force __ 37. Gets placed on Ebay for soughtafter amp on sale (1,3) 40. Houston ‘4 Of A Kind’ thrash band 41. Sinéad O’Connor likes to tick off these bishops of Rome 43. ‘73 Dolly Parton classic about beauty that might steal her man 44. 80s rap movie __ Groove 45. Michael Penn’s wife/Til Tuesday’s Mann 46. Might drink this kind of beer post-show 47. Tom Jones ‘__ __ Lady’ (4,1) 48. Phish saw ‘Halley’s __’ go by in the night sky 51. Reba McEntire might be in car sales when singing ‘Have I Got A __ For You’ 52. Jane’s Addiction classic ‘__ Says’ 53. Like going to a concert alone 55. Kinky song meaning “more” in Spanish 56. Pearl Jam said just be ‘Who You __’ 57. Reid brothers of The Proclaimers, for example 58. “White Male American” Pearl Jam ‘Vs.’ song © 2020 Todd Santos

SUDOKU

Fill in the grid so that every row, every column, and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. Answers will appear in next week’s paper.

Puzzle A

Puzzle B

Sudoku Puzzle A answer from pg 21 of 9/10

Sudoku Puzzle B answer from pg 21 of 9/10

SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 21

NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

Wait, what?

over four years, “none of the cows that we painted with artificial eye spots were killed by ambush predators.” Village chiefs and native farmers “look forward to us coming back and painting more eyes on bums,” Radford said.

• Conducting choir practice indoors was out of the question for Mark Potvin, instructor of music at Luther College in Decorah, Iowa, given the school’s Covid-19 protocols, and finding a space outside posed a challenge until, “I was driving past the city pool,” Potvin told KCRG, and “noticed they were draining the pool.” Officials at Decorah Park and Rec gave their blessing, and now choir members rehearse while standing in the empty pool, socially distanced and masked. Luther ColBright ideas • In Botswana, cattle are left to graze and lege has five choirs and one of the nation’s roam during the day, but that makes them vul- largest collegiate music programs. nerable to attacks by lions, leopards and other carnivores, so two conservation biologists Least competent criminals • John Travis Ross, 33, and Joshua Ray Corfrom the University of New South Wales in Australia have come up with an idea to allow ban, 18, were charged with conspiracy and both cattle and cats to co-exist, NPR report- attempting to smuggle contraband into the ed. Because big cats hunt using the element of Central Mississippi Correctional Facility in surprise, the biologists came up with a way to Pearl, Mississippi, after a drone they used as a make the predators believe they’d been seen delivery device became tangled in a net above by their prey and then abandon the hunt. “We the prison fence, according to a Department of tested this by painting one-third of a cattle Corrections statement. The Associated Press herd with artificial eye spots (on their back- reported the drone was caught on Aug. 26 and sides),” explained Cameron Radford, and carried 2 ounces of marijuana, a cellphone, cig-

Cynthia Lynn Teeple, 47, of Jacksboro, Tennessee, was charged with public intoxication after Campbell County Sheriff’s deputies found her topless in a LaFollette backyard with two miniature horses on Aug. 30, according to authorities. WLAF reported the homeowner told deputies Teeple had been eating grass and dirt from the horse enclosure, and also chewed on one of the horses’ manes. Teeple then volunteered that “the horse’s hair is made of Laffy Taffy and Airhead candy,” according to the arrest report, and admitted she had taken methamphetamine the day before.

arette lighters, phone chargers and headphones, corrections commissioner Burl Cain said.

Investigators were able to trace the drone’s flight and discovered security video showing the men launching it. Cain said officials plan to reprogram the drone and use it at the state’s maximum-security prison in Parchman.

• Three teenage girls in Clinton, Connecticut, have been arrested and charged with stealing a duck after photos of them surfaced on social media, according to police. WTNH reported the girls took a duck named Quackers out of a pen in mid-August at the Grove Garden Center Nursery, where it was recovering from a raccoon attack, and posted photos of themselves with Quackers at the town beach and a house party. The girls were charged with larceny and trespassing. Quackers is still missing.

Suspicions confirmed

Brittany Keech of Belding, Michigan, got an unexpected bit of news with her mail on Sept. 8. “Sitting right on top of the mail,” she told WXMI, was a postcard dated 100 years ago: Oct. 29, 1920. “Yeah, that’s a little too slow,” Keech said. The Halloween greeting from young Flossie Burgess was addressed to her cousins: “I just finished my history lesson and am going to bed pretty soon.” A USPS

spokesperson said, “In most cases ... old letters and postcards — sometimes purchased at flea markets, antique shops and even online — are re-entered into our system ... (and) as long as there is a deliverable address and postage, the card or letter gets delivered.”

Ewwwww

• An unnamed 17-year-old girl in Bokaro, India underwent surgery on Aug. 31 to remove a 15-pound hairball from her stomach following years of obsessive hair-chewing, Metro News reported. A team of doctors led by Dr. G.N. Sahu initially thought the mass was a tumor, but discovered the hairball during the six-hour surgery. The girl was reported to be in stable condition following the procedure.

• Doctors at a hospital in Dagestan, Russia, were shocked to discover the source of a woman’s stomach distress was a 4-footlong snake that had apparently slithered into her mouth as she slept outside her home in Levashi village. In a video of the procedure, a doctor is heard to say, “Let’s see what this is,” Yahoo News Australia reported, as a tube is inserted down the anesthetized woman’s throat. Local residents say such incidents are not unheard of in the mountainous area.

Visit newsoftheweird.com.

BEACH BUM FUN JONESIN’ CROSSWORDS BY MATT JONES

“Report Card” — How did we do? [#373, Aug. 2008] Across 1 It may be fatal 5 Disease contracted by Seal at an early age 10 Brand that pops up frequently in crosswords?

14 Sitar master Shankar 15 ___ ear and out the other 16 Get ready for surgery 17 Couturier Cassini 18 British pottery manufacturer known for bone china

19 City that represents a county 20 Helgenberger of “Erin Brockovich” 21 Less polluted 22 Rowboat need 23 ___-country (Drive-By Truckers’ genre) 25 “Damn, it’s cold out!”

26 “Ty Murray’s Celebrity Bull Riding Challenge” network 27 The Hulk’s catalyst 29 Food vendor’s requirement (abbr.)

30 Resource 33 Last name in riding lawnmowers 34 “___ bin ein Berliner” (famous JFK quote) 35 Desert landscape features

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36 Spicy spread 37 ___ Na Na (group that preceded Jimi Hendrix at Woodstock) 38 It’s said coming and going 39 Kiddie lit web spinner who gets a B? 42 Fashion line?

43 Cartoonist who created Tintin 44 Insignia on Cardinals caps 45 Hathor or Hera, e.g.

47 Won back 51 John’s 2008 adversary 56 Gave high honors 58 “Out of Africa” author Isak 59 Element taken in supplements 60 Flea market event 61 Sets up tents 62 Brand with the discontinued flavor Grape Watermelon Down 1 “You’ll hear ___ my lawyer!”

2 “Ooh ___!”

3 Singer Cocker who gets a C? 4 Leeway 5 Cindy Brady’s impediment 6 Like private phone numbers 7 Billionaire Branson who gets an F? 8 Price at a dime a dozen, perhaps?

9 Fortune teller 10 They’re added to foot baths

SEACOAST SCENE | SEPTEMBER 17 - 23, 2020 | PAGE 22

11 “Dilbert” cartoonist Adams who gets an A? 12 Equipment 13 Makes a decision 24 Hot concept 26 Chocolate necessity 27 Sum up 28 It comes straight from the horse’s mouth 31 Fred’s wife, on “I Love Lucy” 32 ___ Maria (liqueur) 40 Get all emotional and teary-eyed 41 Part of GLAAD 45 Fade out, like a light 46 “We ___ song of sorrow ...” (lyric from Saves the Day’s “What Went Wrong”) 47 Beat too fast, like a heart 48 McGregor of “Angels & Demons” 49 Mineral that’s the softest on the Mohs scale 50 Killer whale 52 Bodily system that includes the lungs (abbr.)

53 Acronym that sometimes means “right now” 54 Word after blood or fuel 55 Place to play horsey 57 Dungeons & Dragons game runners, for short 58 Withdrawal symptoms © 2008, 2020 Matt Jones

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