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Making the most of the Great British countryside
Travel Banter:
ATLANTIC CHALLENGE p27
Discover Ireland
A Day at the Races p19
23
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The Countryside Writer p31
Rural Attire Shark Spotted to Inspire: in British River p7 R L Get the look p9 Environmental Chat p5 URA
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R U R A LHUNTER I
EDITOR’S NOTE What
does
the
countryside
mean
in
Britain today? Perhaps it’s just a space between
towns,
commuters’ time
a
canvas
window
has
or
forgotten.
from
the
place
that
actually,
it’s
a
Well
none of those things. The countryside in Britain today is teaming with possibilities from to is
awe
inspiring
heart here
natural
pounding to
show
spectacles,
adventures. you
how
Rural
you
can
submerse yourself in the wonders of the countryside,
helping
you
to
experience
a way of living that could change your entire lifestyle.
So
offer a
to
what
you,
whole
host
discussions
specifically
the
reader?
of
on
can
Rural
Rural
offers
content
including
environmental
issues,
where it gets to the bottom of the facts and
rumours
around
in
that
the
often
daily
get
media
batted field
of
play. Rural offers the most up to date countryside
themed
fashion
for
male
female
readers,
displaying
and
both
practical and affordable attire that will set you apart from the everyday masses on the high street - Not to mention a whole top
host
of
advertisements
brands
in
the
for
countryside
the attire
market today where heritage and brand recognition is dominant. Rural offers the reader
sample
countryside
literature
themes
so
based that
around
you
can
enjoy both informative and creative text in
this
offers
ambidextrous advice
and
publication.
guidance
on
Rural ways
to implement new countryside activities into your life, giving you the chance to participate in new hobbies and attend all manner of events with lashings of fun and fresh air. Rural offers interesting and
informative
features
that
look
at
viewpoints from all angles; unbiased and offering you all the information you need welcomes to
a
world and
you
of
heritage
practicality,
preserving British and
in
fashionable
the
countryside promoting
rural activities.
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SEAN SIMMS
on all issues. Rural
THE TEAM Editor in Chief Sean Simms Managing Editor Sean Simms Deputy Editor Sean Simms Writer Sean Simms Assistant Writer Sean Simms Art Director Sean Simms Features Editor Sean Simms Production Editor Sean Simms Direct Marketing Sean Simms Marketing Assistant Sean Simms Ad Production Sean Simms Photo Editor/Researcher Sean Simms Advertising Sales Agent Sean Simms Commercial Director Sean Simms Secretary Sean Simms Photographer Sean Simms Administration Sean Simms
Subscriptions subscriptions@rural.co.uk 01234 567 8910
CONTENTS.
Environmental chat: The badger cull. Rural attire to inspire. Countryside romps: A day at the races. Discover Ireland. Travel banter: Atlantic challenge. The countryside writer.
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19 23
27 31 Environment Agency
RURAL - ADDRESS LINE ONE, ADDRESS LINE TWO, ADDRESS LINE THREE, TOWN, COUNTY, POSTCODE, COUNTRY.
Printed by ********** Ltd - Rural is printed six times a year by *Magazine publishing company to be inserted here*. No part of this magazine may be reproduced without the prior permission of the publisher. Every care is taken with manuscripts and photographs but we accept no responsibility for any loss or damage.
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Jack Wills ________
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UniversityOutfitters Here at Jack Wills we design British heritage-inspired goods for the
university crowd. We continue to be influenced by the best of British, from our history and culture to sporting and country pursuits. We take pride in using the finest quality materials, techniques and
design to deliver our distinctive connection between the old and new, epitomising what it is to be young and Fabulously British.
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Environmental B
The adger Cull
T
he badger is an animal that has had a rather controversial history in the UK. With all the current press around the badger cull, we at Rural thought it was about time we gave our readers some factual information on this fascinating animal. So let’s give you some background knowledge first. Centuries ago the badger was known predominantly for the activity, badger baiting. This blood sport involved taking a Dachshund dog, (Dachs actually being the German word for Badger) and pitting it against a badger in a bid to test the strength of the canine. Manmade dens were built in cellars and taverns for the enjoyment of the guests, and then a pre-caught badger would be placed in the den until a dog was put forward to tackle it, in what often turned out to be a phenomenally aggressive fight. The result would usually be death of the badger
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CHAT and a severely injured dog. Fortunately for the badger, and the dog, this activity was outlawed in the nineteenth century and new legislation made it illegal to kill, injure, take or interfere with a badger or badger set unless a licence was gained from a statutory authority. Moving on to the twentieth century, the badger actually became a food source in Britain during the Second World War and the early 1950s. Although not eaten in Britain anymore, badger is still consumed in some parts of the world like Russia where the food is widespread. Since the 1970s, in most of Europe, badger population control, or culling, is now prohibited as the animals are protected by the Bern Convention (a binding legal agreement concerned with protecting habitats and species). However, in the UK, culling has been sporadic for many years now, starting again as recently as 2012 with the
permission of DEFRA (Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs). So, as an iconic species of the British countryside, why do we need to cull our badger? Bovine tuberculosis, or TB as it is commonly known, is the answer to that question. Unfortunately for the badger, the species is a carrier of mycobacterium bovis, the specific bacterium that causes tuberculosis in cattle. This has lead to Britain having the continuing dilemma, save the badger or protect livestock the epitome of a terribly unfortunate catch twenty-two. A close relative of the badger is our old friend the otter. Both part of the mustilidae family, these two animals cover a wide spectrum of environmental issues in the UK. Otter numbers were high in the UK until the mid 1950s, but by the 1970s the introduction of pesticides, used by farmers, caused a huge decline in the otter population. By the 80s it was looking like the otter would soon be extinct from rural Britain, but work with various nature organisations over many years boosted a once failing species to be widespread again. So if you look at this from a neutral perspective, you can see that unfortunate distribution of farming chemicals nearly wiped out a beloved creature of the British countryside, but working together enabled the otter to rise again. Perhaps there is something we can draw from this with regards to the badger and cattle farming – getting people to pull together and do what is best for the countryside as a whole rather than splitting off down two roads with heavily opposed, and often destructive, views and opinions. The future of cattle farming is constantly hanging in the balance with outbreaks of tuberculosis still present. Many, who work in the farming industry, having seen a tough time of it over the past few years, are hoping they can work with the Environment Agency to do everything in their power to control the spread of infection. This has however meant that over the years badgers have been gassed and shot to cap this terrible disease that they carry. So what results have we seen in this country after mass
and selective culling? Unfortunately results have been extremely inconsistent and no tactic has really changed the situation. Some even followed a rigorous programme of vaccination for the badgers but still no conclusive evidence has been obtained that changes the predicament. There are very strong opinions on this topic, which has led to a lot of very poorly executed media coverage. Unfortunately for the general public, tabloids have taken to educating the masses with rumour and twisted statistics. The knock on effect that these headline-happy morons have created is a divide, which has torn apart any rural and urban solidarity on the issue. We now face a situation where some are
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trying to protect the badger, as lovers of all things furry, without knowing the effect on livestock and farmers. Others are taking the law into their own hands and killing the badger without consent from the proper authorities. Badgers are now being killed illegally and dumped at the side of roads to imitate road kill to avoid detection. In comparison, some activists who are lacking in factual information are causing trouble for hard working country folk who have been given the power by the authorities to cull the badgers in a fashion that has been deemed acceptable by law. So where does the mess end and is there light at the end of the tunnel? Well the future of the badger is still uncertain at the moment, it seems as though the nation is constantly being illinformed of the facts and the individuals who are aware of the truth behind badger culling are still heavily divided. Half believe that badger culling is just going to wipe out the badger with no real effect on cattle welfare where TB
will still be prevalent – with the ultimate view that if there isn’t going to be much of a chance of this working, then why bother with the culling? In opposition, some believe that population control, if done properly and consistently, will help to protect the cattle and look after the farming industry but with a view to make sure the badger population isn’t brought to its knees like the otter population once was back in the 1980s. So some might say it’s a time to be on the fence over this issue and leave it to the professionals to work it all out – but here at Rural we think that you should form an opinion based on the facts. However it is important to appreciate both sides of this argument with a view to bring the nation back together. The ultimate view here should be to do the greater good and conserve the British countryside as a whole. We should be working together to do what is best for all creatures great and small and making the people of Great Britain proud of our natural habitats.
For more factual information on the current situation of the badger cull in Britain, please visit;
www.defra.gov.uk
5ft Shark SNAPPED in Essex River
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Perhaps a Sunday stroll along the river with the dog is your idea of peace and tranquility, watching the gentle flow of the water that cradles all those cute little fish and animals that live there. Well think again, as in early September this year a shark (that’s right – you heard me) was spotted in the river Stour that runs through Essex a huge ten miles inland. This 5ft monster, (pictured left) was a starry smooth-hound shark, spotted and snapped by a rather startled 27-year-old Mr Gribbons of Essex. These creatures are invariably found in the Atlantic and the Mediterranean, but there are regular sightings off the British coast. However a shark that far inland, plodding around a sluice is definitely as rare as British shark stories come. But fear not readers, no need to be missing out on the delights of the river in fear of Jaws, these sharks have blunt teeth, feeding mainly on crabs, and are not dangerous to humans. The British countryside knows no bounds and you never know what amazing natural spectacle you might see, but you won’t see it sat around urban areas - so get out and get hunting for the sight of a lifetime… don’t forget your camera!
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Environment Agency
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If you would like to find out more about the Environment Agency and the work we do in an area near you, please take a look at our website.
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Protection of the environment relates to threats such as flood and pollution. The vision of the Agency is of a rich, healthy and diverse environment for present and future generations. Our remit covers the whole of England, about 13 million hectares of land, 22,000 miles (35,000 km) of river and 3,100 miles (5,000 km) of coastline seawards to the three mile limit which includes 2 million hectares of coastal waters.
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The Environment Agency’s stated purpose is to protect or enhance the environment, taken as a whole, so as to promote the objective of achieving sustainable development.
www.environment-agency.gov.uk RURAL I
ATTIRE to
INSPIRE T
he world of fashion… ever changing, bizarre, daring and always full of surprises. But maybe you don’t have time to be keeping up with all this ‘in one minute, out the next’ nonsense; and who could blame you? Who wants to spend an entire pay cheque taming that credit card interest all because red is the new brown or green is the new blue? Rural Attire to Inspire is a feature that cuts out all of the nonsense; bringing you timeless clothing that never goes out of fashion. The collections we promote at Rural always make sure that attire can be affordable, durable and fashionable. What more could you want? So how is it that countryside clothing can fulfil these three attire needs simultaneously? Well that’s an easy one – countryside clothing is built for a purpose, just like a sailor wears ‘oilies’ or a surfer wears a wetsuit. If you plan on spending a long time outside all year round in rural Britain, you had better be damn sure your clothing is prepared for the elements. That’s where a thick cable knit, waxed jacket
or tweed deerstalker come in. Often people see this kind of clothing and think it is a tad overpriced, but the difference is that many of these superbly tailored items are crafted with such perfection that a piece can last you years, or even a lifetime. So if you consider how much you spend on a new jacket from the high street every year, and then think about a classic item of clothing lasting many years - I think we all know that the slight investment is worth its weight in gold. In this issue of Rural we have given you a sample of autumnal smart casual fashion with a whole host of fabrics that can be moulded to fit many shapes and sizes. All of the clothes are accompanied by name, brand and price so if something catches your eye you have the details to treat yourself and get it on your back. So browse through these timeless styles and I guarantee once you have slipped into the comfortable, practical and stylish world of countryside attire, you will be forever hooked and set to inspire.
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Barbour Quilted Chelsea Jacket. £129. North Face Winter fur hat. £39. Ralph Lauren Chino. £90. Barbour Quilted Autumn boot. £105.
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Harris Tweed Wool and patch blazer. £119. Jack Wills Salcombe skinny jeans. £79. Ralph Lauren Embossed floral shirt. £69. Barbour Country casual wedges. £110.
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Gieves & Hawkes of Saville Row Grey herringbone (tan/ navy) large checked suit. £349. Ralph Lauren Royal tweed waistcoat. £119. Jack Wills Summer graduation tie. £49. Ralph Lauren Winsmore checked shirt. £79. Jack Wills Suede lived-in brogues. £110.
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Barbour Corbridge waxed jacket. £235. Crew Strawberry checked shirt. £59. Ralph Lauren Skinnyfit rugged jeans. £100. Barbour Cherry checked scarf. £49.
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Waterproof waxed clothing you can trust
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Jack Wills Classtime navy blazer. £160. Hugo Boss Unisex short checked scarf. £84. Ralph Lauren Mustard jeans. £100. Barbour Plaited tan belt. £39.
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In the next issue we will be taking a look at winter attire that will most certainly inspire. This year we will bring you a multitude of layers that you can mix and match to get the look that is right for you. Additionally, many of the items will be unisex so if you are one half of
a power couple, be it a friend, loved one or roommate - perhaps a pooled item could be the way forward! So this winter, collect your issue of Rural and be prepared to be extremely cosy and effortlessly fashionable compliments of the Rural Attire to Inspire team.
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T
he extent of horse racing for most is an annual punt on the Grand National at Aintree - perhaps a pound or two each way on a horse with an amusing name or a jockey with nicely coloured hat. You might think that visiting the races is something best left to the aristocrats in their executive boxes and the hardened gamblers trackside, clinging on to the rails. To this fallacy I say, oh contraire. Horse racing offers anyone and everyone the opportunity to get outside in the fresh country air, enjoy great food and drink, witness an elite sporting spectacle and take a fantastic journey through an emotional spectrum. Today, Rural magazine visits the Stratford Races in Stratford-upon-Avon, birthplace of Shakespeare and home to
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the scenic river Avon meandering its way through this beautiful part of Warwickshire. We want to show you that going to the races is not only fun, but also fashionable where attendance can be achieved on both a budget as well as lavish extravagance with no expense spared. Firstly, let’s talk attire. Fashion at the races is big business with meetings like the Cheltenham Festival boasting eye-wateringly wacky tweed suits and of course Royal Ascot, famed for its bizarre and wonderful hats. But don’t let this put you off; you don’t need to make a spectacle of yourself! Almost every racecourse offers a variety of tickets; usually split into at least three
AT THE
tiers. Whether you want to sport the tweeds and hats, supping on champers all day or if you want to be a bit more casual and set out a nice rug for a picnic, there will be a ticket for you. Entry prices at racecourses around the country vary. In some areas tickets can cost as little as eight to ten pounds and be bought on the day. However for those more popular meetings a ticket booking in advance is necessary. For a more immoderate day, prices can soar well into the hundreds with additions like luxury hampers and access to the trainer and jockey enclosures. At Stratford Racecourse there
RACES
is a great scheme that offers discounted tickets for what they call the ‘Generation X’ of race-goers. This means that young adults aged 18 to 24 can attend without having to dip into the student loan or that inner-city-rental budget. If you were thinking you need a fat pile of cash for the betting, you would be very much mistaken. A pound here and there is enough to get you going – remember the races aren’t about making a fortune or squandering one either, it’s about the buzz and the atmosphere. I guarantee that win or lose; you will
get the same level of enjoyment and satisfaction from your day at the track. If you’re still not convinced, let me tell you a bit more about the kind of day you can expect. Often there will be six or seven races in a race meeting starting just after midday (so you can still sleep in on your day off. Ideal). Usually you will have at least half an hour between races to soak up the atmosphere, look at the stats and place your bets with the friendly bookmakers littered around the
track. Here’s a little tip though, make sure you don’t place your bets with the first bookmaker you see as you might get a better return on your stake elsewhere on the course with another bookmaker! If you want a cheeky glass of wine or pint of local ale to keep you going, many racecourses have a bar and restaurant. If you want something to eat on the go there will always be a burger van to manage that hunger.
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It doesn’t matter who you are or how much you have riding on a race you will ALWAYS get that feeling that will emanate deep in your stomach as the horses line up at the start. As they set off the heart rate will increase and with every furlong all your senses seem to heighten as the mood in the crowd around you intensifies. At every fence you will hold your breath, hoping your horse makes it over safely and stays in the race. As you see the horses turn in for the finishing straight you will feel your heart almost beating out through your chest and strange noises of excitement, rarely shared in public, will start to slip out. As they rush for the finishing post, you will know by now if your selection is still in contention - if so you will be caught up in the moment with hordes
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of people shouting and screaming encouragement to their selection around you. In an instant the race will be over and your emotional state will either be one of jubilation or deflation. But you won’t worry if it’s the latter as you will be too busy trying to figure out your selection for the next race where it starts all over again. Exiting stuff and not for the faint hearted - your first day at the races will not be your last. We at Rural had a marvellous day at the Stratford Races. The atmosphere was electric and the sporting highlights were unforgettable. So get online and search for the nearest racecourse to you, make an enquiry, get your etiquette on and go have a fantastic time. I guarantee you won’t be disappointed.
CER TIFIC ATION TR ADEMARK
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Discover Ireland Choosing a destination for travel is both an exciting but equally daunting prospect. When you start planning a trip, travel time, budget, weather and more have to be taken into account. Often the more appealing destinations include long-haul flights and this can lead to needless stress at a time that should be earmarked for relaxation. So what can you do to achieve all the things you want to out of a holiday without stress of travel, hidden costs and language barriers?
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Here at Rural we think we have come up with a solution to this on-going problem by presenting you with an often-overlooked destination. Ireland is a fantastic country for many reasons. If you are keen on history and enjoy awe inspiring scenic landscapes, Ireland will not disappoint. Less than 80miles divides the West coast of Wales to the East coast of Ireland. Travelling by ferry takes as little as one and a half hours (plus you can also take your car) or if you choose to go by plane, Dublin is less than 400miles from London, taking around the hour mark what more could you ask for in terms of a short journey to a fascinating European destination? If the city life of Dublin is a bit too much for you and you really want to relax in peace and tranquillity, Ireland has a smorgasbord of counties that offer all sorts to the holidaymaker. If you go
north towards the border you will find County Cavan, a landscape littered with huge lakes and loughs where on almost all of them you can fish, kayak, boat and more all for free. If you go south near Cork you can go visit the Blarney Stone, a world famous tourist hotspot that offers the traveller the opportunity to hang over the edge of the castle backwards to kiss the underside of the stone which in turn endows the kisser with the lifelong gift of eloquence and skill at flattery. In terms of accommodation, you can expect all types of residencies from cheap B & B’s to manor hotels. Regardless of the price of your digs you will always be guaranteed a great Irish fry-up complete with all your English treats as well as soda bread, (a lovely dark cakey bread) and white pudding (a spicy little treat to accompany your regular black pudding).
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town in Ireland is a little different from what you might be used to in the UK as more often than not it will just be one main strip. This will stereotypically contain a small supermarket, hair salon, post office and around one hundred or so pubs… Ok, perhaps that is an exaggeration but there will always be plenty of water holes to choose from where you can sample the finest Guinness in the world. Most of the pubs will have live music on in the evening that can be anything from rock to traditional Irish music, usually kicking off around 11pm and running through until everyone has had their fill and are in need of a pillow. An example of the fun you can have in these small but lively places takes us back around fifteen years when a small bar in Belturbet, one of the northern counties, was having a good old sing song when none other than the legend himself, Johnny Cash walked through the door. After a few drinks, to the amazement of the locals, Mr Cash decided to take the guitar and do a few songs – a private concert for around thirty lucky people who were in the right place at the right time. Although Rural are a countryside loving publication, we can also appreciate that urban areas have a lot to offer too. In Dublin itself you can visit a whole host of attractions that will keep you occupied. One of the most obvious is the Guinness factory, the home of stout and Irish tradition for over a quarter millennia now. Inside the factory you will come across the largest pint glass in the world, staggering views from the tower overlooking Dublin and of course a free pint of the black stuff to get you started on the road to merriness. If Guinness isn’t your tipple, you can always pop over to the famous Jameson Irish Whiskey Distillery to sample some of the finest whiskey in the world. Then when you have had your fill you can take a stroll along the Temple Bars stretch, taking in the Irish craic and submersing yourself in good old-fashioned Irish fun! If you are looking for crowds of people and an exciting time you can always take in a sporting event. Just outside of Dublin is the famous Punchestown horse racing track which always boasts a fun filled day; however if you want something a bit different, you could sample some Gaelic football, always drawing a passionate crowd with heaps of excitement thrown in for good measure. If you are a football or rugby fan, you will be glad to hear that Gaelic football is basically a combination of the two. It is a contact sport with fifteen players and H shape uprights like rugby, but a spherical ball and netted underside to the posts like football - it really will cater for all your sporting needs! As you travel around Ireland it is plain to see that the landscape is like no other. No two houses are the same and pastel colours illuminating these homes brighten up the country roads. It’s
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a fact that Irish history plays a big part in peoples lives, with troubled times marked by memorial plaques and statues. If you take a look at Irish history you can appreciate that as a country they have been through some pretty hard times. Over the centuries, numerous invasions from European countries have given Ireland a colourful history. Perhaps one of the most well known incidents Ireland is known for is the nineteenth century potato famine where two thirds of Irelands staple crop were destroyed, leading to an estimated one million deaths and a further emigration of another one million. In the twentieth century, Ireland achieved independence and became a republic, which gave great hope to many, but now, with the failing of the Euro, Ireland is stuck in a financial crisis
with large unemployment and loss of faith in the government. This all sounds quite depressing, yet there is something about Irish spirit that has enabled the people to pull together. Instead of being depressed about life, the people voice their opinions with traditional Irish music and take a satirical look at the problems, so now you will experience an even stronger camaraderie and community spirit. People are grateful for visitors and tourism, funding the traditional values which they hold so dear, and that is why you will always receive a welcome that is worthy of royalty. So take a trip to Ireland, soak up the atmosphere and scenery and learn about the history of this complex republic - guaranteed to be a holiday of a lifetime.
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Travel Banter
Atlantic Challenge T
his week Travel Banter has a strong nautical theme as we say ‘ahoy there’ to Sean Simms, a Postgraduate student from Oxford. This summer Sean plunged himself in at the deep end with rather unusual expedition, one that stretched over 4250 nautical miles across the Atlantic Ocean, experiencing the wonders of an oftenoverlooked travel destination. Many would assume that to take on a journey of this scale you would have to be a bit of an old skipper who knows their jib from their jibe?! Agreed, sailing knowledge does come in handy when spending five weeks out on a vast an unpredictable ocean. However, our matey admitted to being a bit of a lilylivered land dweller before this journey. Sean told Rural, ‘After very little time researching sailing experiences online I found that an Atlantic crossing had only three prerequisites – to stay alert, pay attention
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and learn fast. Two months later I was out in the middle of the ocean guiding our 65ft racing yacht, Diana, through the rolling swell as part of a 12 strong crew in a bid to achieve a transatlantic crossing.’ So as easy as A-B-C? Not quite. Although Sean was lacking in sailing experience he did have to budget for this trip. Overhead costs included the purchase of some super-seaworthy waterproof clothing, one-way airfare to Antigua and specialist sailing insurance to cover himself on this rather unpredictable voyage. We couldn’t possibly fit in all of our hoards of questions about this trip so instead Sean has been kind enough to provide us with a sneak peak at his memoirs from this expedition. This short extract is taken from what Sean describes as an ‘average’ day midway through the challenge – all be it VERY far from average…
May 30th 2011 - Atlantic Goosewinging We were ambling several hundred miles off the Caribbean coast. On an increasingly insignificant yacht, the waves ceased and the doldrums revealed a rather large swimming pool complete with its very own curvature. A reluctant skipper begrudged us a brief break, so without hesitation we poured in to the ocean. A resting Atlantic permitted bathing of sun-beaten skin and ingestion of worrying levels of sodium chloride. Several acrobatic dives and a missing bikini top later - not mine I might add, the frolics were impeded. A red-faced skipper emerged from the darkness of the cabin and barked dissatisfaction at such disturbances in over 19,000 feet of water. Depths comparable to an inverted Kilimanjaro had separated us from the seabed. After several hours of windless humidity I began to feel like a co-ordinate. Fortunately the day’s entertainment was resurrected when a puff of spray emanated in the distance. Regimented breaks in the calm drew
closer and an awe inspired audience became mesmerized by a magnificent beast. The loosely identified Pilot whale gave a poignant display; a master of his habitat, several tonnes of animal moved through the water with a grace that only evolution could permit. Our earlier invasion was utterly paradoxical in comparison. Just as the dorsal vanished from sight, a sudden breeze eerily flapped the mast; an ill wind was afoot. Darkness descended and I could almost sense entry into the event horizon. An angry Atlantic had surely been in cahoots with the British climate, as a once calm ocean turned into a violent smorgasbord of unremitting waves. Lumps of water crashed over the bow and struck me full faced. The laws of equilibrium offered an intimidating wind speed in force seven conditions, a balanced average velocity came at the cost of an unbalanced yacht. Below deck the invention of the gimbal was appreciated. The system soon tailed off and the trusty craft
emerged at the edge of the cloud all be it weather-beaten and bruised. I enjoyed the last few hours of darkness navigating by Polaris. A hazy sun began to peak over the horizon, yet a crisp morning air was not sufficient enough to keep me alert. The swell gently rolled the craft in an almost hypnotic fashion and consciousness was waning. In keeping with a certain relentless nature of the night shift, a sudden popping on the water sparked my attention. As I stood disturbed and slightly confused, several more popping sounds occurred within earshot. I twisted my stance to monitor the adjacent ocean just in time to see a fox sized porpoise, complete with pod, tracking alongside me - the bedside alarm has never been the same. As the day grew older and the breeze pressed, orders were given to make the most of the current wind direction and we set our masts goose-winging for old Blighty.’ By Sean Simms
“There’s no thrill in easy sailing
when the skies are clear and blue, there’s no joy in merely doing things which any one can do.
But there is some satisfaction that is mighty sweet to take,
when you reach a destination
that you never thought you’d make”
If you like the idea of travelling across one of the most secluded destinations on earth, perhaps a sailing trip like this could be on your horizon. So get on the net, get researching and get ready for the trip of a lifetime. PS – don’t forget the seasickness tablets though!
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Countryside WRiTER M
uch like composing a fine piece of music, or sketching out a beautiful drawing, writing is an art form that is becoming increasingly popular in the culture of today. When you put pen to paper of fingertips to keys, the possibilities are endless. At Rural it has recently come to our attention that there is a new chap on the block with regards to countryside writing whose style achieves the perfect balance of entertainment, culture and suspense. Sean Simms is twenty-six years of age and an avid fisherman. His passion for angling has taken him all over the globe from the rough seas of the Atlantic to the humid rapids of the Amazon basin. Sean is equally passionate about writing and when these two hobbies are combined the result is spectacular. Many see angling as a rather quiet pastime with little action to keep one entertained other than the occasional kingfisher whizzing past and the odd acorn plopping down in the water adjacent. In actual fact, angling has provided Sean, and many others, with some fantastic stories – many taking place in the British countryside. Today Rural has the pleasure of providing you lucky readers with a short story taken from Sean’s upcoming book Angling and I, due for release with Wiley Blackwell late November 2014. So sit back, relax and take in a rather enchanting tale, but be warned – you may get hooked!
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Ode to a Swan Chapter 9
Short Stories Sean Simms It was a quiet morning on the cut, the river flowing gently behind and the village church sounding hourly updates opposite. I was enjoying occasional sport from the gudgeon that had congregated under an elderberry bush on the far bank; typical canal fishing in late November with most species preparing their scales for the harshness of the harder winter months. The spot had been kind to me in the past, with perch touching 3lbs taken on the lob worm down the track, roach on the punch tipping the scales at nearly one and a half pounds and on several occasions, a welcome slab that I struggled to coax into my rather undersized canal net. All too often, when catching well in this area, a pike would show up and terrorise my swim. The previous year I hooked a leviathan that took me for a rather unexpected walk down the canal path before performing acrobatics and sending a half bitten fish hurtling back towards me. Slapped in the face with a fish head was not how I had pictured the end to that story. It appeared that my old friend the gudgeon was the only species on the agenda this time though, but I didn’t mind - I always thought of them as miniature barbel. After half an hour without a bite, even from the gudgeon, my attention was drawn to the pulsating sound of a pair of swans flying overhead. As I turned to watch the cumbersome pair struggling to imitate anything close to graceful, my quiet mornings angling took a rather shocking twist. Proof that swans are much more elegant on water - one of the birds collided with an overhead power cable. An ultraviolet flash and a noise that chilled my bones to their very core saw the swan fall to an untimely end. This was certified on seeing what can only be described as a taxidermist’s final piece; a straightened neck and
Front cover of the exciting new publication Angling & I. Look out for this online and in your nearest bookstore around November this year.
outstretched wings frozen in time, laid peacefully on the other side of the river bank parallel with canal. Soon after, the accompanying second and third cables connecting the masts blew. Another flash of purple provided an ungodly explosion of sound, shattering what remained of my dwindling nerves. I looked back at my float only to find it hanging happily with the elderberries. Damn. The comforting sound of the church bells had been replaced for backup security alarms sounding throughout the village. A short time later pot bellied man came ambling down the towpath. He was dressed in a thick orange overcoat with silver reflective piping, perhaps more of a dress actually due to his circumference height deficiency. He didn’t look happy to be spending his Sunday monitoring swan vandalism. I told him what I had witnessed and he informed me that the swan had knocked
out the entire villages electricity supply. As a law abiding angler I was not sat in a ‘Danger Overhead Power Cables’ zone, as the power line didn’t cross the canal for at least a hundred yards to my right; never the less, 33,000 volts had exploded only thirty yards behind me. It was at that moment it dawned on me that I had been sat on a rather long and effective conductor made of finest carbon. There is a lesson to be learned here - if you’re going to sit near a swan breaking a power cable, DO NOT hold your fishing pole between your legs or you could be the last in your family tree to do so! I packed up my gear, fishing pole first, with electricity jumping in mind. Just as I was ready to leave I noticed the remaining swan flying overhead again. It was at that point I remembered that swans often partner for life... a rather amusing anecdote would turn in to a rather sad one. By Sean Simms
Angling & I is different from your bog standard publication. Mixed in between chapters are short tales from the riverbank, funny stories and small images and comic strips sketched by Sean, like this rather amusing example (pictured right). This publication obviously hinges around fishing but essentially it falls under the travel writing genre. With five star reviews from The Independent and Country Life Magazine, the proof is in the pudding – so get it pre ordered and be prepared to go through a magical journey visiting some of the finest countryside destinations on the planet.
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BE PREPARED.
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