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EDITORIAL OFFICES / %*9*& )*()8": t 8*-50/ ."/034 '- 1)0/& '"9
NORM KENT 16#-*4)&3 "/% &%*503 */ $)*&' 16#-*4)&3/03.!4'(/ $0. Pier Angelo Guidugli
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ohn Patrick Kelly, an artist residing in Pompano Beach, was a pre-kindergarten age boy in Castle Rock, Colorado, when he said, “Mom, I’m going to be an artist.” Not only did Margaret Blanche Kelly grasp the magnitude of what her son was saying, she nurtured his sense of purpose. She bought him professional brushes and paints. When the school said he was too young for them, she insisted, “He’s going to be a painter someday.” To have such unwavering maternal support is rare and beautiful. For several gay men who are also artists in our community, remembering mom on Mother’s Day is a chance to reflect on and appreciate the strength, love and kindness that shaped their lives. Kelly experienced an unconventional childhood. Occasionally, she would pull him out of school for an artistic or visual adventure. “You don’t have to go to school – I found an art gallery we should visit,” she would say. “She was always exciting and stimulating. My mom was a schizophrenic,” Kelly shared. “But I never wanted to trade places with anyone. I moved her down here to Florida and she fell in love with a man at the nursing home. She thought everything I did was wonderful. She was a good, good woman.”
Steven Sylvester, a ceramicist in Fort Lauderdale, was the fourth of five children born to Dolly Sylvester in Dearborn, Michigan. “It was a wonderful place to be a child,” he says, and describes his mother as a “natural mother. “She was very, very loving, supportive and nurturing. Throughout my childhood, we did things together. She took me to the Detroit Institute of Art.” Her interest in the subject manifested itself in a passion for photography and documenting family life, as well as artwork for the home. After Steven came out at 16-years-old his mother was not surprised. “The door was open for me to communicate with her about my life and boyfriends,” he says. “My mother’s only concern was about what could happen to me down a back alley or in a bar. She was worried about me getting hurt. It was a fact of life back then. I told her I was okay. When I produced a boyfriend, she stopped worrying.” His mother passed away, but Steven and his siblings share something important. “It’s a really strange observation from five different people with different beliefs, but we have always felt her presence.” Kaleel Munroe, a student at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Coral Springs, has nothing but kind words for his mother, whom he is said to resemble. “She’s
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very hard-working and a great influence on me. She is holding her own, raising me, my brother and sister, in this recession. She always has a positive attitude,” he says proudly. They do things together, like working in the yard and shopping. “She’ll pick out something for me and I’ll pick out something for her,” says Munroe, adding that his
mother listens to his fashion advice. Whether your mother is a daily presence in your life or a memory from decades ago, Mother’s Day is a time to remember all the positive lessons learned from her. Steven Sylvester says, “All that is good in me came from my mother. She was kind, loving and gentle.”
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years when he accepted the job of presiding over the Perry v. Schwarzenegger case (now known as Perry v. Brown). Yes, there will be a lot of opportunity for drama at the hearing. But attorneys who would like to see Proposition 8 ultimately struck down –presumably at the U.S. Supreme Court level—adamantly insist they see virtually no likelihood that Judge Ware will vacate Walker’s decision. “This is an absurd, desperate, and patently offensive motion,” said Theodore Boutrous Jr., one of the lead attorneys on a legal team headed by conservative attorney Ted Olson and his liberal comrade David Boies. “We are glad Chief Judge Ware has expedited the proceedings and look forward to responding to it.” Yes on 8 attorneys had requested a hearing date of July 11, but on April 27, Ware said he would expedite the motion to vacate
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to June 13. That same day, April 27, the 9th Circuit panel that heard Yes on 8’s appeal in December of Judge Walker’s decision, tossed two other sideshow motions back to Judge Ware. Both concern the videotapes Judge Walker produced for his own use in studying the evidence at trial to reach his decision. One motion, from Yes on 8, demands that Walker return the videotapes to the district court and have them sequestered; the other, from the Olson-Boies team, seeks to have the videotapes released publicly. The conflict over the videotapes was just a minor sideshow until Judge Ware instructed Judge Walker to appear in court. “All participants in the trial, including the presiding judge (now retired), who are in possession of a recording of the trial proceedings, are ordered to appear at the hearing on June 13, 2011, to show cause as to why the recordings should not be returned to the Court’s possession,” stated Judge Ware’s order. Yes on 8 filed its motion to retrieve and sequester the videotapes after they learned that Walker used a three-minute clip from the trial during a recent speech concerning the history of cameras in the courtroom. Walker is an advocate for allowing cameras in the courtroom, particularly at the district court level, where a factual record for a case is created. No one is yet predicting how Ware will rule on that issue. But, for a number of reasons, the impact of that ruling is relatively minor. A transcript of the three-week-long trial and its closing argument are already public record. The motion to vacate Walker’s ruling is both more consequential and more dramatic. It is almost certainly the first time a legal team has sought to disqualify any judge – state or federal— because the judge was in a relationship with the partner of the same sex. (This reporter has been covering LGBT legal cases for more than 25 years and cannot recall one instance.) Gay legal activists agree with Boutrous that
the motion to vacate is a “desperate” longshot tactic by Proposition 8 proponents. Jon Davidson, legal director for Lambda Legal, characterized it as a “Hail Mary” tactic. And Yes on 8 has reason to throw a “Hail Mary.” Their appeal of Walker’s decision to the 9th Circuit is in jeopardy over whether there is any California law that authorizes them to appeal a decision that the elected representatives of the people –the governor and attorney general-- had chosen to not to appeal. The California Supreme Court is expected to hear arguments on that question in September. If the court rules –and the 9th Circuit accepts— that Yes on 8 has no standing, Walker’s ruling will stand and same-sex couples may again obtain marriage licenses in California. Thus, if the Walker decision stands, Yes on 8 hopes its motion to vacate will kill it. But Yes on 8 would likely characterize its motion as more of a late flag, than a Hail Mary, and they blame Walker. Before and during the trial last year, Walker never publicly disclosed he was gay or in a relationship with a man. But the San Francisco Chronicle, in a well-publicized political column published a week after the testimony portion of the trial ended, reported that it was an “open secret” in San Francisco that Walker is gay. It quoted a fellow judge –a “friend and confident” who it did not identify himself for the report —as saying Walker did not “conceal” his private life. And, having retired from the bench in February, Walker, 67, hosted a sort of farewell briefing April 6 with a group of six local court reporters. One of the reporters asked Walker about the report in the Chronicle that he was gay. Walker, according to reports from several of those at the briefing, acknowledged he was gay and that he had been in a relationship for the past 10 years with a man. Asked whether he should have recused himself from the Perry case, Walker stated emphatically that he did not believe he should have. “It would not be a positive development if you thought that a judge’s sexuality, ethnicity, national origin or gender would prevent a judge from handling a case - that’s a very slippery slope,” he said, according to one published account, in the Daily Journal, a legal newspaper in San Francisco. PART TWO: The U.S. Code says a judge must recuse himself if he has any interest in the outcome. But does Judge Walker’s 10-year relationship with a man amount to proof that he had some personal interest in the outcome?
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Walker’s ruling thrown out because he is a gay man who has been in a long-term relationship with his partner. According to the lawyers for Protect Marriage, they refrained from raising the issue of the judge’s sexual orientation (one of the least well-kept secrets in Lawyer Land) during the trial, but once the now-retired 67-yearold Republican appointee disclosed that he was in a long-term relationship, <&,!#.!$+%&&'%9#$.,>)(#8$%)*7$<>9), this made him “too similar” to the plaintiffs in the any years ago, the late and case who were seeking to marry. Protect Marriage general counsel Andy great U.S. District Court Judge Constance Baker Motley of the Pugno was quoted as saying: “We deeply reSouthern District of New York was assigned gret the necessity of this motion. But if the to hear a case alleging sex discrimination by courts are to require others to follow the law, one of New York’s top law firms. The plain- the courts themselves must do so as well.” According to Pugno, it is not that the tiffs were no doubt as pleased by the assignment as the defendants were displeased: judge is gay, but that he is in a stable relaJudge Motley had served as one of Thur- tionship that should retroactively disqualify good Marshall’s top deputies at the NAACP him. If the judge were cruising gay bars and Legal Defense and Education Fund, before picking up young men, that would – preMarshall was appointed to the Supreme sumably – be fine with Pugno. Come on. If being gay disqualifies you from taking Court and Motley to the federal district court. She was widely known as a strong a position on gay marriage, so does being straight. If being in a relationship is disqualsupporter of women’s rights. This was, no doubt, why the defendants ifying, then all of the judges in relationships in the case moved to disqualify her, claim- here in California (and by my reckoning, ing she could not possibly judge fairly the most of them are) should be disqualified. claims of bias raised by female lawyers Walker hasn’t said a word about wanting to get married, any more than Motley wanted against male lawyers. Motley would have none of it. She re- a job at the firm that was being sued. As Motley might say, there are no judges fused to recuse herself, pointing out that if being female was enough to disqualify her, with no sexual orientation in California and then being male was enough to disqualify precious few who have not been in, who are her male colleagues. And since, as she put in, or who are on their way out of relationit, the southern district did not include any ships. That means Walker was as qualified “neuter” judges, she was as qualified as any- – or unqualified – as any judge to decide this case. His decision should stand. Protect one to hear the case. I couldn’t help but remember the story Marriage’s efforts to throw it out because of when I heard this week that the sponsors of his private life undermine their claims that the anti-gay marriage amendment in Cali- they are anything other than another antifornia were seeking to have Judge Vaughn gay group.
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have no children of my own, nor I do the back, where the smoking section used not want children of my own. I wouldn’t to be. It would be for babies, children, teens know what to do with them. They are and their obnoxious parents – unless their such a mess, annoying at best. I don’t under- names are Brad and Angelina but not Mastand why gay people all of a sudden have donna, she’s too annoying. Oh, do you remember how well that evethese paternal or maternal urges. It’s beyond ning at the restaurant was going? Yes, until me. Gaybies? Stick to cats and dogs. you hear the dreaded What is the first thing words from the next that happens when – aftable: “Can we have a ter having taken your high chair?” It’s nine seat on a plane bound PM! Why is the child for Vegas and having out this late? That can paid extra for a pillow, kill all the romance a blanket, an aisle seat, you have enjoyed unplus the beverage cart til then, and you have hasn’t showed up – here only had a sip of your comes a mother carfirst drink. It is going rying an infant and a to be a long evening. 5 year old? First, you Might as well order the think, why are they on whole bottle. There are my flight, again? Secno bases in sight, I asond, why are they going sure you. to Vegas anyway? They are running our You know very well !"#$."'8*$%($%$+#)%.#-$<,&!&%7#*$')$$ %88'%)A$')(>&%).#$%*?#&!'(')9/ lives! Certain TV prowhat kind of nightmare you are in for. It never fails. The only thoughts for the next six or seven hours are: how can I squeeze that child through and out of the window without anybody noticing? Or, how can I softly kill myself? If I was an airline CEO I would make it either “adults only” or have a sealed off, sound proof, partitioned area, all the way in
grams have to be broadcasted “after hours”, by then who cares, I’m already asleep on the couch – that’s how I missed Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson’s flash of flesh. In the meantime the baby in the next apartment wakes you up, around midnight, with his/ her wah-ing, pleasing only to the ears of new parents.
Aspirin bottles can only be opened with the aid of a nuclear reactor just in case a kid with a headache gets a hold of the container and dies of an overdose. Let him open the bottle already. I believe in survival of the fittest. Pure evolution. Rented movies are often edited for family viewing, same thing with TV shows. What about those of us who have no children, is it not the job and duty of a parent to monitor what kids watch or do? Parental Guidance Suggested. Suggested? First of all it should be mandatory and second, do not infringe on my freedom to hear a comedian use four letter words during his solo act at four in the afternoon. I hate those blips, people do not blip when they talk – unless you are George W Bush. Ok, maybe he was squinting, I don’t remember exactly. If they can’t handle it then all children should be shipped on an island and
stay there until they are twenty years old or their parents have grown up. Only Ricky Martin and the twins will get an amnesty. That would be an almost perfect world. Alas, there is no such place and if there is I have to go. My best friend asks me to baby-sit her kids and before I get to her house I have to stop at Publix and pick up a few treats. Cookies and ice cream, Skittles are always a hit; the little one calls them “incledibles”. There are three of them, Alessandra, 9, the Taylor Swift CD I downloaded will keep her happy and prancing around the family room; Emily, 5, we will sit on the couch and watch, again, “Finding Nemo”, with both of us crying at the appropriate moments, but tonight I have to beat Franco, 10, at NBA Live. I don’t know how he does it but he is a wizard at it. I swear if I don’t win at least one game I’ll never baby sit again. Want some Skittles?
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ittle stories” come to our attention all the time. “Little stories” sometimes get me mad. As Matthew and I searched for Gayvine content he mentioned a boy in high heels. I thought he meant a friend of his who dressed in drag for our SFGN booth in March. I merely said, “OK.” A few minutes later I realized the subject was not Matt’s friend. Instead, it’s a teenage boy, proud of who he is, who expresses himself by wearing high heels to his Tampa area high school. The Riverview High School student was in class when some classmates harassed him over the high heels. When he was asked to remove them – he refused. The he in high heels was not penalized. Although he was made a spectacle of, removed from class, sent to the principal’s office – punishment enough. However, nowhere does it say if the harassing students were punished. Also, nowhere in the student handbook does it say a male student is not allowed to wear high heels. A student claiming to be the unidentified teenager’s friend states he often wears high heels. “He likes the way they make him feel. They make him feel more confident, and he just likes to wear them,” said Riverview senior, Hayley Stepp.
What a wonderful job of guidance by the public school system! This is an example of making someone ashamed of who they are by projecting their own discomfort, inner prejudices, and taboos into the situation. Even the whole feeling of the news broadcast by Fox 13 felt… uncomfortable. They passed judgment between the lines. They did everything but call the poor kid a faggot! “This story is a little different though. Tonight we’re talking about a high school student,” says the male anchorman on Tampa’s Fox 13. He seems to put emphasis on “this” after discussing mothers who support their little boys who like to wear dresses. His tone implies it’s cute for a five-year-old to dress up as Daphne. However, it’s not all right for a high school student – someone arguably more self-aware than a kindergartener. “Yeah, he wore high heels to school, he got in a little bit of trouble for wearing the high heels,” says the blonde anchorwoman sitting next to her male colleague. She intoned high heels as if the youth were busted for possession of heroin. The camera next goes to reporter Kristin Wright. “In a school environment where kids are
just not mature, and not always so nice, it can get tricky,” she states. Wright’s tone expresses distaste when she emphasizes the “he” in high heels. Video shot at Riverview High School does not reveal much contempt against the he in high heels. Perhaps only the students who heckled the boy initially take umbrage. In addition to Stepp’s statement, another female student said he should be allowed to wear what he wants. A male student said he doesn’t think
men should wear high heels, but that’s just his opinion. We then meet the principal, his tone smacks of someone who just bit something sour. “I have to take the paternal side as well,” said Assistant Principal Heilmann. The word paternal conveys something deeper. As if he wanted to say, “high heels today, homo tomorrow.” It exuded the old, paternal “I have to protect my son from femininity and homosexuality because I don’t want
him taking it up the ass” fear. “Anytime anyone goes out of from the quote norm,” yes…he dared use that word. “Anytime anyone wants to make a statement you have to be willing to take what comes with it.” He claims he was protecting the boy from harassment. Yet, despite initial taunts, students expressed solidarity with the boy. In fact, one boy gender-bended his outfit in support of the he in high heels. However, the principal isn’t one for school spirit. “One boy wore a dress on Monday and after we chatted about it, he decided not to,” Heilmann told the Fox reporter. After learning that self-expression is not acceptable the boy-in-dress changed into clothes fitting the “norm.” Heilmann was concerned for the boy’s safety. Student safety is a concern for schools throughout the country. However, the adults are really the harassing parties. No one seemed to have a word of sympathy for the he in high heels. “The first time he felt shame when was when they called him out of school,” said Hayley Stepp of her friend. They of course being the faculty, who made someone feel ashamed. I tried finding these kids through Facebook with no success. I wanted to tell the he in high heels not to be ashamed of who he is at all. Instead, be ashamed of the adults uncomfortable with your confidence. Oh, one more thing, make sure your heels always match your outfit!
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espite its stellar, well-known rise to political prominence in many cities across the country, local LGBT communities might find themselves hard-pressed to document their glory days in coming years. We apparently are forgetting our history as fast as we live each new day. So many people have either died, moved away from the cities of their youth or both that the number of people who remember what happened in their locales after the birth of the gay rights movement in June 1969 are dwindling daily. It’s not unusual for people not to be able to remember local LGBT political gains in cities nationwide because definitive histories have not been written about our local cultures. It’s not unusual for arguments to break out about what gay bars existed when and where because there is so little record of their existence.
If we don’t remember where we’ve been and what we’ve done, are we prepared for where we need to go in the future? Many LGBT communities are fortunate to have long-running publications that have chronicled the events of several decades, but most lack those resources. Some LGBT people have amassed personal collections of gay magazines, newspapers and other literature dating back to World War II before most people in the community were born. But I’m only aware of a few cities where such collections have been saved for scholarly use. When old timers in the LGBT community talk about what they witnessed decades ago, it provides a fascinating glimpse into what life was like for LGBT people struggling in an oppressive time that most of us have never experienced. Research of newspaper archives reveals
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that in the 1950s and 1960s law enforcement agencies aggressively pursed gay people in their homes during private parties. People were literally arrested for same-sex dancing in those days. PBS has produced a fascinating 90-minute documentary, “Stonewall Uprising,” that focuses on LGBT life in New York City in the 1960s and what led up to the pivotal moment in 1969 when gay men, lesbians and drag
queens decided to revolt against tyranny. Likewise, there have been show business histories written about the persecution of LGBT people in Hollywood in the 1950s, but what happened in most other cities is in danger of being lost forever. LGBT communities thrived in some manner in every city of any size, and it needs to be documented. We can’t afford to forget that our lives today are literally blessed in comparison to what the people before us experienced. We can’t ever let politicians forget that our lives matter, and that we will never go back to the old days of subjugation. And don’t ever forget that there are still many people around who would like to see our community dissolved and powerless. Pastors of churches that are members of the powerful Southern Baptist Convention are proponents of a movement to discredit and render us politically powerless. That’s why it is important to document our history, to show young people in our community what we accomplished and to show our detractors that we’ve fought many battles in the past and that we will do it again if necessary. Perhaps, it could be a collaborative effort with many writers who lived through the times reflecting on what happened. We’ve certainly got the talent and the resources in every city to document our history. The idea has been tossed around before, but apparently nothing has ever came of it. Isn’t it time that we did it? David Webb is a veteran journalist who has covered LGBT issues for the mainstream and alternative media for three decades. E-mail him at davidwaynewebb@yahoo.com.
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the hijackers with four other men. Ultimately, the plane did n the morning after not reach its intended target – the United States anwhich may have been the White nounced Navy Seals House. Sadly, to stop the plane killed Osama bin Laden – in it was run into the ground, with what has been described as a no survivors. Hoagland wishes comfortable, affluent Pakistani Bin Laden had been brought to suburb – Alice Hoagland aptrial but is grateful his time as peared on the Today Show and a threat to the world has come spoke with Meredith Viera. +%&:$6')9"%+ to an end. Her son, Mark Bingham was on “I miss my son,” said Hoagland. “He was flight 93 which went down in Pennsylvania. Bingham and a few other men decided to the light of my life. Everyone who died on Sept. 11, 2001 had people who loved them, take on the terrorists. “I’m very proud of what Mark did along who miss them, and who were terribly with his fellow passengers...and that little robbed by the actions of Osama bin Laden.” For mothers around the United States, group of guys in the back of a pitching 757 that took a vote and decided they were go- whose children died on Sept. 11, or in ing to run forward, armed with nothing the war against terror as a member of the more than their fists and whatever they Armed Forces, this Mother’s Day is indeed a bittersweet end to 10 years of searching for could find onboard to fight real evil.” Her son, an out gay athlete, overtook Bin Laden.
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hen I asked my seven-yearold son what he thought I should write in my parenting column about Mother’s Day, he said, “Tell them that having two moms is just like having two people of any kind take care of you, except it’s more work on Mother’s Day.” I’m a little worried, since at his current age we haven’t even asked him to make us both breakfast in bed. I’m not seeing a lot of waffles in my future. His comment got me thinking, though, about what it means to be a mother. For me, motherhood began with the birth of our son. For others, it may begin with fostering, adoption, or partnering with someone who has children from a previous relationship. And some may choose to use the title “mother” instead of “father” as part of accepting a female gender identity (although I also know transgender parents who continue to use their original parental titles even after transitioning). But becoming a mother is only part of what it means to be a mother (or a parent of any gender, for that matter). Raising a child involves caring, feeding, butt-wiping, guiding, motivating, listening, picking up after, teaching them to pick up after themselves, and otherwise preparing these growing humans to become functioning members of society. If they learn to make waffles along the way, so much the better. As my son explained to me when I asked what more I should tell my readers, “To be a parent of a child, you have to allow your child to make some choices but you to make some others. It’s especially important that you be nice to your child and not mean, otherwise he or she will not grow up right.” I’m not sure if that last comment is a
social observation or a threat—but I can’t disagree with his overall assessment. Parenting is indeed largely a matter of nurturing and encouraging a child’s growing independence while balancing it with a certain measure of adult wisdom and re-
sponsibility. Of course, all that talk of wisdom and responsibility can make parenting seem like quite the dull chore. To me, however, one of the best parts of parenting is that it has given me an excuse to do many of the things I haven’t done since I was a child—visit children’s museums, play on playgrounds, reread Dr. Seuss, make baking-soda-and-vinegar volcanoes in the
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kitchen. I could have done those things without having a child, to be sure, but the motivation wasn’t there. Raising a child is a reminder not just to take responsibility, but also to get out and play, to wonder anew at how the world works, and to ask lots of questions. And being a parent doesn’t mean knowing all the answers—just being willing to try and find them. It also means being protective of our children. That protective instinct can manifest itself in various ways—from shooing a toddler away from the stairs to comforting a teen after heartbreak—but for me, it has also sharpened my desire for LGBT equality. I want equality not just for myself, but in order to protect my son legally and financially. I want it so that he grows up proud to be a citizen of a country that values and respects all its people, and treats them all equally. I want policies, understanding, and inclusion in our schools, camps, sports, and other children’s and youth programs to make sure he never feels his family is inferior. Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, however, can seem designed to underscore that our families are different. Many LGBT parents have concerns about how schools will approach the events and whether they will, even unintentionally, make our children feel uncomfortable about their families. But they may also give us an excuse to have conversations with teachers and with our children about our families, making the occasions into learning experiences rather than anxiety-producing ones. There’s also no reason we can’t repurpose one of the holidays to fit our families, or to use the entire time between the two days to celebrate each of the many people whom we call “family,” including donors, surrogates, birth parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents of donors, etc.—whatever works for you. Make it into your own tradition—hang one family member “apple” a day on a hand-drawn
family tree—or orchard, if you prefer— each day between one holiday and the other, for example. Make a dinner at the end that celebrates the heritage or geographic locations of several parts of your family— or just their favorite foods. Being a parent can sometimes seem like trying to juggle on a rollercoaster. Being an LGBT parent can sometimes seem like trying to do so without the safety belt everyone else is wearing. But the experience is really not so different for any of us. It takes balance, flexibility, and nerves of steel. Sometimes you need to grab on to the people around you; sometimes they grab on to you. Sometimes you all throw your hands up into the air and yell. Mostly, though, you just enjoy the ride, even if you can’t see what’s coming around the next bend. My son’s final comment to me about this column was to note, “My mothers have also given me a lot of love.” Maybe someday he’ll make us waffles in return. But really, just having him say that is enough. Dana Rudolph is the founder and publisher of Mombian (www.mombian.com) a blog and resource directory for LGBT parents.
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f art is important to you, whether it’s a child’s drawing or a priceless masterpiece, it should be kept preserved for future generations to love and cherish, after all, you don’t just put a Van Gogh up on your wall with a push pin. Hopefully, you’d protect it with a marvelous picture frame. It’s apparent that Bob Gilmore and Art Hound Framing here in Fort Lauderdale know precisely how to protect your precious possessions. Art Hound Framing opened in 1975. Since then they’ve opened four more stores, another one in Fort Lauderdale, two in West Palm Beach and one in Lake Worth. The owners, John Bivelacque and his wife, Veronica Lopez were unavailable to speak with SFGN, but we did get a chance to chat with the charming and enthusiastic Bob Gilmore who works at the East Sunrise Boulevard location. Gilmore, an avid art collector himself, spoke of the dangers on unprotected artwork. “Valuable pieces can be destroyed if you do not properly frame them. We sometimes have to send damaged artwork over
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to conservatories because the piece was so damaged. The artwork didn’t have the UV protection glass on them or they had been eaten up by the acidity in the cardboard.” Gilmore joked: “Maybe it’s because we’re so close to the yacht yard, or it could be that I’m just so good. But we get to change frames for 18th century pieces that either the Captain or first mate bring in. They are really brilliant pieces!” Art Hound carries everything from metal, wooden and the increasingly popular floating frames. Gilmore explained that a lot of artists paint over the entire canvas and the floater frame to give it a sleeker, sharper edge. “We have frames from all over the world,” Gilmore proudly stated. “We have over 100,000 samples, from local suppliers to Italian. Many times, if someone has a specific frame in mind that we don’t have, we can still get it in the store.” Gilmore spoke very highly about the gay community and their love of fine art, “We get both straight and gay customers and we have a pretty good following. What I’ve noticed about the gay community is that they love, appreciate and most importantly, protect their artwork.” How great would it be if you brought in your mother’s favorite picture or painting to Art Hound and fit it with a beautiful frame for mother’s day? I’m sure she’d love it and brag about it for years to come. Art Hound is located on 1958 East Sunrise Blvd in Fort Lauderdale. For more information, call 954-767-0200.
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hen Dr. Loren Olson called to talk about his autobiographical new book Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight, a Psychiatrist’s Own Story, he had just received a letter from his ex-wife who had just finished reading the book. Because I have several friends who “came out” later in life, after marriages to women and raising children, I was curious about that letter and about his current relationship with a husband, two adult daughters, their spouses and his grandchildren. Dr. Olson was a reader of my advice column on Bilerico. com, and I was pleased to find myself in conversation with a wise, cordial, trustworthy 68-year-old gay shrink. Dr. Olson wrote Finally Out for spouses, counselors and a more general audience beyond those men who are leading secret gay lives. “I didn’t want to make it a how-to manual,” he said. “In fact, it is very hard to market a book like this to the hidden gay audience because they are often afraid to purchase a book that might be found by a spouse, son or daughter, exposing their secret.” Dr. Olson’s goal for Finally Out was to use his personal account of agonizing growth and his psychiatric training to show how self-identity is formed in both functional and dysfunctional ways. He is convinced unhappy gay men have the power to change how they feel about and conduct their lives. The key to attaining happiness is to adjust your definition of “ideal self” so that your self-assessment will lead to self-esteem. Dr. Olson’s laughter is warm and easy. He was not hesitant about answering my doubts about his claim that he did not know he was
gay until he was 40-years-old. He admits that many men challenge the veracity of that statement. “There are two things that explain this. My father died when I was very young and in my mind, I could attribute any sense of my being “different” to not having a strong male role model. I used it as an excuse to explain away things that might have been obvious indicators that I was gay,” he explained. “The second is disassociation. Like the myth of Santa Claus, you believe it when you’re young. Then you become suspicious and suddenly the truth explodes. Our minds don’t allow us to see things that are too painful. I had adolescent sex with other guys but I dismissed it. My sexual desires and fantasies before I was 40 were nebulous and not really focused on men or women. It wasn’t until I was kissed by the married man I had an affair with that I finally realized the full experience. That happened when I was 40. That kiss forced me to reinterpret everything in my life. A lot of the younger gay guys who have grown up in a different world don’t get that.” Because south Florida is full of men who have arrived after completing and shedding an earlier closeted life, I was interested in what Dr. Olson had to say about the false steps made by men who try to make up for lost time. Our discussion moved swiftly from humorous to grim. Dr. Olson himself did what many older men do who want to rapidly join their newly discovered gay brotherhood. He set out to earn his gay merit badges at warp speed. He learned continued on page 26
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A99V-J,01,D A@-2*8,B13,-I9=;139 Mother is a voracious reader, something she passed onto me. Even in high school she read aloud to me at the breakfast table each morning, from my books for English class, to keep me ahead. However, our tastes in books differ. For instance…mom loves crime books of any kind. I do not. So, rather than write a column about mom for Mother’s Day I asked her to write a book review. Yes, I did edit mom’s work, but it’s only fair! After all she scrupulously checked my papers all through school. She’s quite a good book reviewer – I am pleased to learn! Happy Mother’s Day Mommy! – A. Sebastian Fortino
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kylar Deleon was born into a corrupt family – “screwed up” in fact. His father was an abusive drug dealer. Lynette, his mother, abused and terrified for her life, left Skylar with his father and paternal grandmother – a volatile, mentally unbalanced woman. His father had a Napoleonic complex, who constantly shared tales of success and power that were 90 percent fabrication. Yet, people listened. Deleon became a child actor, with a minor role in the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. By 20 however he was unemployable, and joined the Marine Corps. Later sharing tales of exaggerated heroism, although he was let go on an “other than honorable discharge.” Within a year of marriage to Jennifer
Henderson, Deleon was arrested. He pleaded guilty to armed burglary home invasion and was placed in a work furlough program. In jail though he made friends with a young guard, Alonso Machain attentive to his tall tales and a cellmate convicted of money laundering and counterfeiting. They thought up illegal schemes to pass the time. One of these plots ended with the killing of a man in Mexico. Tom Hawks, was a retired probation officer and bodybuilder, married to his and second-wife Jackie for the past 15 years, with two adult sons to whom they were close. The Hawks placed their yacht the “Well Deserved” on sale, where it was moored, at
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Newport Harbor, CA. The couple was last seen at the harbor, on Nov. 15 2004, and also when phone calls to their sons stopped. The bank revealed the yacht changed lands, but no activity had taken place on it in 19 days. Evidence revealed Deleon tried to access funds from their accounts, but failed. Jim Hawks, Tom’s brother, was a former police chief and with current police Sgt. Eppel went aboard to investigate. They did not see anyone. Jim left a note saying, “I’m trying to locate my brother Tom Hawks”. Later, Deleon appeared calm and confident as documents were examined by police. Detective Byington of Newport Beach PD said he wasn’t interested in any probation violation or tax transgressions Skylar may have committed. He was trying to find Tom and Jackie. Deleon stated he and the Hawkses planned deals involving money laundering and tax fraud. The Hawkses gave him power of attorney to open bank accounts in Mexico to hide assets. However, nothing in Deleon’s story fit the couple’s behavior. Ultimately, the Hawkses never left the boat. They never had the chance, as they invited Deleon onboard for a sea test. Deleon sadistically tied them to the boat’s anchor, then threw them into the Pacific, their bodies never recovered. Deleon, his wife, and John Kennedy – a friend involved in the crime – all received the death penalty. In court Deleon’s story revealed telling people he was born a hermaphrodite. Although he had children, he produced pictures for Machain showing female genitalia. Deleon claimed fathering children before sexual reassignments surgery. However, police learned he had not undergone any such surgery but had been taking female hormones since 1998. Motivation for crimes against the Hawkses may be linked to the fact Deleon needed money for prescheduled sexual reassignment surgery, set to take place a few weeks after the crime. Caitlin Rother’s research for Dead Reckoning proves she is a journalist worthy of having been nominated for a Pulitzer Award. Also, it’s just a terrific, page-turning read. Sklyar Deleon is a dastardly character whose ability to manipulate makes for an unbelievable tale.
continued from page 25
cruising can be both ego-bruising and dangerous. The book includes an account of a close friend of his named Ken who picked up the wrong two men after a night of drinking, and brought them home where they murdered him while his daughter slept in an adjacent bedroom. On the topic of older men entering a new gay life, Finally Out covers everything an older gay man might not know about loving what he calls “Men With Rounded Corners.” In a satisfying 24-year relationship with the man he married, Dr. Olson speaks with authority and sympathy. Dr. Olson told me one very important tool he personally used to navigate the dangerous waters of cruising gay bars when he briefly went through that period of his life. “When I would go into a bar in a city where I was a stranger, I would always include a very large tip when I paid for my first drink and I’d say to the bartender ‘Keep an eye on me. I’m older but I’m new here.’ It helped me not to be victimized by someone known to the bartender as bad news.” I think this is excellent advice not just for older men, but for anyone out of his element, and well worth the extra expense. Enlisting the help of a bartender may not guarantee your safety but it might increase your chances of avoiding someone dangerous. I insisted that Dr. Olson add this advice to the second edition. How about that letter from his ex-wife? Dr. Olson reported “It was such a thrill to hear from her and to know that she absolutely loved the book. I told her that even if nobody else buys it or likes it, I will feel successful because she liked it.” I suspect many others will buy and like Finally Out. Visit MagneticFire.com for more about Dr. Olson and his book.
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SV ½PP SYX JSVQ SRPMRI EX 7SYXL*PSVMHE+E]2I[W GSQ GPEWWM½IHW 4<<L22L$4&!L"# PERFECT VACATION RENTALSLOW SUMMER RATES From $69/Night & $395/Week Beautiful Studio, 1 & 2 BR Apts. with Full Kitchens. Clothing optional heated pool, laundry, parking. Close to Gay Dania & Nude Haulover Beaches. Incl. Cable, Tel. & Wi-Fi Internet. Pets Always Welcome Call (954) 927-0090 or visit www.LibertySuites.com ------------------------------------------------CUTE 2/1 WITH FENCED GARDEN $800 water and trash removal included located on Marina Mile. Small pets welcome. Laundry facilities Contact Sherry 954-646-9430 for info
4<<L("&!"? PAUL GUZZARDO,CPA, P.A. Accounting Services,Tax Preparation, Financial Statement, Small Business Audits 954-551-0408- paul312@comcast.net ------------------------------------------------LaFONTAINE & ASSOCIATES ACCOUNTANTS Individual and Business We offer strategies that limit your tax liability and increase your total return. www.FLTaxMan.com 954-495-4565
4(&L-J%)4!J MOBILE AUTO REPAIR. Gierseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Mobile Garage, Inc. BMW & Mercedes Specialist. All Makes & Models Welcome. Licensed & Insured, Credit Cards Acptâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d http://giersesgarage.webplus.net/ Call 954-557-6530 for appointment
<C%4"!"?-#%JM!<%# GET IT CLEAN NOW! JOTA Home & Office Cleaning Excellent Professional home and/or Office cleaning in Broward County. From Simple Dust & Tidy Cleaning to Complete and thorough Deep Cleaning. Excellent References from Private & Office Customers. Call Jorge. 561-577-9285 ------------------------------------------------ITALIANO HOME CLEANING SERVICE. Honest, Reliable, Quality cleaning for your home. Bi-Weekly or one-time available. I guarantee my work. Serving Broward Area. Call David 954-608-8913. ------------------------------------------------CLEANING SERVICES. Years of Experience. Condos, Apts, Homes, Offices, Move Ins/Outs. Weekly or Bi-Weekly. Wilton Manors, Oakland Park, Middle River Terrace, Fort Lauderdale Area. Great References. Call BJ 954-512-3957
<L2)(&%J`&%<' FAST, RELIABLE SERVICE, AT YOUR PLACE or ours! New PCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and Laptops sĂŚ6IRUSĂŚ2EMOVAL ĂŚ(ARDWAREĂŚ2EPAIRSĂŚsĂŚ 4ELEPHONEĂŚ3YSTEMS ĂŚ0#,AUDERDALEĂŚsĂŚ ĂŚ E Oakland Park Blvd. 954.636.3322. www. pclauderdale.com
------------------------------------------------TOPSPEEDTECH.NET. Gay-Owned Mac/ PC Computer Support. Small business and home computer repairs/maintenance. Wireless networks, new system setups and more. (954) 320-6411 www.TopSpeedTech.NET ------------------------------------------------COMPUTER/NETWORK SUPPORT FOR HOME OR OFFICE. Personable and Reliable Computer Network Support. Professional with over 15 years of Enterprise Level Experience. Affordable Rates. Contact Peter at (954) 816-4126 Or peter@netechsystems.com
%2)CLN2%"& PRODUCTION INTERN Learn the publishing industry in a gay environment. Get the skills and knowledge needed to become a traffic manager or newspaper production assistant. Call 954-530-4970 and ask for George.
ILJ-#4C% 2 INDOOR PORTABLE AC UNITS FOR SALE Both used, freestanding working airconditioning units-- originally $450 each, now selling for $200 each. Call George 917-8342264 for more information. ------------------------------------------------NEW SIMMONS w/ warr. BeautyRest Q SET 499, Sofa/Lv. 550 GORGEOUS, Recliners 290. MUST SEE. Call Joe 954-707-8789 ------------------------------------------------MERCHANDISE. Beds King 180,Queen 130, Full 110,Twin 90, Frames 30, 5 Piece Bedroom Set 399. All Furniture 954-465-6498
'%C)-K4"&%$ A BEAUTIFUL & UPSCALE NEW GAY BAR located in the heart of Downtown Miami is opening soon- we are looking for Barbacks, Security, Bartenders, Cocktail Servers, DJâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, MC, VIP Host, Cashier, Male Dancers. Also looking for experienced Bar Mgr. & Dance Mgr. Excellent Pay and benefits. Send Photos, Resume, Contact Info tonewmiamiclub@gmail.com ------------------------------------------------STYLIST W/CLIENTELE WANTED Chair rental, Private, Professional Hair Studio setting. Must be responsible, professional and a person without any substance abuse problems. Contact Dean Allen @ 954-564-1377. www.deanallen-ahairstudio.com
------------------------------------------------DUNHAM Insurance Services. Protecting the lifestyle to which you are Accustomed. Get Domestic Partner Rates. Call 954-564-7772 or Toll free at 1-888-564-7772 ------------------------------------------------CORRECT COVERAGE INSURANCE Life/Health/Group/Dental/Disability Income/Annuities call toll free 1-877-646-2238 or 954-561-8297 Jim Rakvica www.correctcoverageinsurance.com ------------------------------------------------WHILE FINANCIAL PLANNING is important to everyone, for the gay and lesbian partners it can be crucial. Let Morgan Stanley Smith Barney help you develop a plan that works for you now and in the future. Daniel M Pye 954-267-5683
C%?4C-#%JM!<%# PROUDLY SERVING THE SOUTH FLORIDA GLBTX COMM. since 1993. Law officeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s of Robin L. Bodiford, PA specializes in Bankruptcy, Probate, Wills&Trust. Call 954-630-2707 -------------------------------------------------CREDITORS CALLING? Call Us! The Law Offices of George Castrataro, PA. Serving Clients With Integrity and Compassion 954-573-1444 -------------------------------------------------SELZER & WEISS, ATTORNEYS AT LAW Last Will & Testament, Living Will Health Care Power of Attorney (POA) w/ HIPAA release, Durable Financial POA, for $399.00. PERSONAL INJURY: Free consult, if no recovery, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no fee or cost to you. 954-567-4444.
,-./012345436735$3!893:99;< 7I\ +SH Rev. John McNeill to speak at Stonewall National Museum and Archives Tuesday, May 10, 2011, 7PM Rev. McNeill comes to the Stonewall National Museum and Archives to speak about his recently published book, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sex as God Intendedâ&#x20AC;? and upcoming film documentary, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Taking a Chance on God.â&#x20AC;? For further information please contact the Stonewall at 954763-8565 or visit www.stonewallnationalmuseum.org )%J#L"4C-&J4!"!"? SENIOR TO SENIOR A.C.E. Certified & Insured. I know how you feel. Call David at 954-281-6098 or Email me at TrainerD1@ yahoo.com -------------------------------------------------CHANGING LIVES SINCE 1991 Certified fitness trainer with private gym. Strength and Flexibility Training. All fitness Levels. Frank Ward 954-630-0908 ------------------------------------------------IF YOU ARE READY TO MAKE A HEALTHIER you a lifestyle call Christy Fritch,BS CPR certified 954-445-2540
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BUTLER PLUMBING One of South Floridaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best plumbing service companies - Professional plumbing services along with kitchen and bath remodeling. 100% quality work. One year warranty on workmanship. Call 561-613-7338 www.butlerplumbinc.com
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FHA, FANNIE Mae, VA & Jumbo Mortages- Direct Lender. Experts in Purchase & REFI of ALL Types of properties & condos. Unmatched Rates & ClosingBurti- OFFICE: BR. > 954-294-2540 !"#(J4"<%-U-I!"4"<!4C- PB.> 561-883-2424 U.S.>1-866-4FHA MORTGAGE (866-434-2667) ALLSTATE DIRECT: PERSONAL auto, home, condominium,boat and life insurance. For 2LM!"? a free quote call Joe Mier 305-754-7414 ------------------------------------------------- RAINBOW MOVING & DELIVERY. AMERICAN TAX & INSURANCE Free estimates. Short Notice Expert The safe return of your money is our top Packing, Commercial & Residental priority. Call Al Cicotte & Kevin Palombo Moves, Office Moves,Licensed & Insured. at 954-302-3228 10% off with Ad. Terry 954-776-6683
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J%4C-%#&4&% GREAT 2/2 CONDO ROYAL PARK Condo in park setting East access to everything! Impact Windows with beautiful view http://www.push13.net/Condo/index.html -------------------------------------------------3 BDRM 2 BATH HOUSE FOR RENT Walking distance to Wilton Manors big LR, sun porch, new floors, w&d hkups remodeled kitchen, fenced yard, cent air $1350.00 per mo. 1 year lease. 954-765-3704 -------------------------------------------------2/2 WELL MAINTAINED CONDO Lake View. Opened bedroom for spacious floor plan.New Fridge. Added Cabintry. Walk in closets.Tile.Screen Balcony. $39,900. Terri w/ReMax 954294-3937
------------------------------------------------SINGLE FAMILY Sale$ 297,000 Area: 1376 Sq. Ft Lot area: 8525 Sq.FtYear built: 1957 Floor type: Terrazzo Call Now 954-240-3940 ------------------------------------------------TOWHOUSE IN GATED COMMUNITY 2 bedroom 1 1/2 baths in Pines West Upgraded windows, new water heater and garbage disposal. Move in condition! Diversified Community! Centrally located Pet Friendly $106,500 Call 954-471-6865 ------------------------------------------------DISCREET PRIVATE SECURE FT LAUDERDALE BEACH CONDO $169,900 Building & Unit totally renovated Ocean views from Bedroom Balcony Living Room. Intracostal Apartment elegant Bob McGlynn Exit Realty rebobmac@yahoo.com 954-478-6321 -------------------------------------------------KELLER WILLIAMS REALTYTed Adcock, Realtor Cell: 954-609-4393 tedftl@aol.com -------------------------------------------------1 YEAR FREE LOT RENT - PRIMARILY GAY PARK Fort Lauderdale/Lauder Lakes. New Manufactured Home. Hurricane Ready 1,600sf 2BR/2BA 32â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Party Deck overlooks huge Lake. Wood Cabinets & Granite Tops, Slate & Marble floors. Immaculate. Real Show Place! Pics @ www. forsalebyowner.com/listing/7W4ZB Cost $205K+, Sell $129,900, Call 954-817-6233 ------------------------------------------------HOLLYWOOD OCEAN FRONT CONDO FOR SALE ON PENTHOUSE LEVEL 2 Bed/2 Bath, Newly renovated. Only Motivated Buyers. 2,200 sqft. $570,000. Call 954-328-7412 Ronnie -------------------------------------------------3/3 SINGLE FAMILY HOME 1949 old Florida charm. New kitchen and appliances, d/w, disposal, washer/dryer, central air. W/S inc in rent. Near Dixie & Oakland. $1500 mo. F/L/S 954-254-5220
------------------------------------------------TWO BEDROOM MIDDLE RIVER HOMES CONDO. Two bedroom, two bath condo in pet friendly building with wash/ dryer in unit. Close to Wilton Manors. First and second floor units available March 1. $975 f/l/s. Jimmy Cunningham licensed Real Estate Agent Castelli RE Services 954-303-7380. -------------------------------------------------CUTE 3/1 HOUSE NEAR WILTON MANORS 3/1 (tub/shower) w LARGE FENCED yard, laundry rm, & patio. Ceiling fans, central AC. Walk to Wilton Drive. 1200/mn + 1200 sec dep. Call 954-649-7601 -------------------------------------------------GAY ANDREWS AVENUE Large 1/1, all utilities incl, granite, d/w, private fenced tropical yard, all tile, vaulted ceiling, adt security. $750. Call 772-626-1345 -------------------------------------------------THE SHAPIRO GROUP INC Residential Property Management LICENSED REAL ESTATE BROKER www.shapiroproperty.com 954-434-0175
J%"&`C%4#% 2/2 CONDO BEACH/ICW 2/2 W/DOCK Beach/Boat Loverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dream with 30â&#x20AC;&#x2122; dock!! Beach Club;canal views;htd.pool/spa; one pet OK. Call Mike Ciereck 954-650-1620. Only $1575. Eastside Realty Group. -------------------------------------------------FOR RENT: DOWNTOWN FORT LAUDERDALE location Church Sanctuary & Meeting Room. Call 954-731-8173. -------------------------------------------------WILTON MANORS 1BR/1BA one block from shopsRestaurants/ nightlife. A/C, ceiling fans Terrazzo floors,laundry room with washer and dryer. large screened in pool & patio. $900/mo. includes:electric call 954-563-4442 -------------------------------------------------WILTON MANORS LARGE 2BR/1BA in 4 plex. newly renovated, CAC, polised terrazzo floor, new bathroom, fenced yard. $1150/mo F/S 954-566-8049
JLL224&%# FTL-CORAL RIDGE POOL HOME Male to share remodeled 4BD/4BA home w/2 males. Unfurn, W/D, chefâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kitchen, wi-fi, lg pvt backyard w/dive-in pool, 1.5 mi to beach. $800/mo. 954-609-9405.
7)0* ()*)27) WOMEN ON GUARD. Non-lethal, self-defense and home protection products call Susan Eaton or Martha Martines at 954-532-0600 or email us at info@womenonguard.com
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MAGALIE PEÑA, DSW Going beyond the call of duty
JANELLE VEGA, MD Caring for the diverse population
From the most extraordinary medical issues to the routine, every member of Jackson Health System is ready to answer the call to become your hero and save the day.
DILEEP YAVAGAL, MD Battling stroke – and winning
SUZETTE CLARK Fulfilling her dream of helping others
MARK MULTACH, MD Ensuring equal treatment for all
We are internationally recognized for the cutting-edge medical care we provide — and we stand ready to serve you. Each with a unique story, our expert doctors, nurses and staff dedicate their lives to providing the highest level of quality care to our patients and helping them feel better, fast.
FOR THE TRUE STORIES OF THESE JACKSON HEROES VISIT: www.JacksonHeroes.com