Beyond the Oxygen Mask

state you are in when you ask a question does too. The feelings you embody when you ask yourself a question have a real effect on the answer.

Feelings and emotions impact your physiology. When you feel ashamed when asking a question—what did I do wrong? Shame, stress and cortisol rule the day. When you feel fear you tend to ask questions such as “What if something terrible happens?” Anxiety, blame, stress and guilt are created.

Taking a moment to pause, breathe and notice your physiologic and emotional state before you ask yourself a question is key. Deep breaths, hand to heart, yoga, and nature all offer opportunities to cultivate calm, change your nervous system physiology, and optimize your question asking.

Questions asked from calm and grounded energy, yield wise, calm, centered answers. Questions asked when you feel relaxed and safe rather than overwhelmed or threatened, yield possibilities and creative solutions. Mindfulness encourages curiosity, non judgement, compassion, patience, gratitude. In addition to calm, these are worth intentionally channeling when you ask yourself a question.

Love is also.

Love is one of the most energizing, activated, hopeful, optimistic and expansive emotions.

Love is powerful when it comes to asking questions.

If you take only one thing from this article—borrow my favorite most empowered question “What would love do?”

This question is versatile and universally helpful. It helps in moments of stress and decision making of all kinds. It helps provide clarity and a path forward in marriage conflict, parenting struggles, career transitions, and conflict with colleagues. It even helps with patients.

Love makes decisions that are good for you. Good for your patients and good for your team. Love makes decisions that are good for your children, your partners, your families, and the world. Love doesn’t feel resentful or bitter. Love takes good care of yourself and others. Love exercises and eats healthy most of the time. Love doesn’t stay in toxic relationships, departments, or jobs.

Love can even help you ask yourself better questions-loving questions.

What questions would LOVE ask from now?

Likely ones that will make you calmer, happier, and more connected with those you love.

If you want to learn more about how to ask yourself empowering helpful loving strategic and smart questions- ones that lessen burnout and help you feel more satisfied with your life, take a listen to this recorded session on the topic by visiting https://youtu.be/8Yk5OC6HT4I or scanning this QR code with your smartphone.

Jessie Mahoney, MD

I used to share the idea of putting on your own oxygen mask first as a physician wellness concept. No longer.

Oxygen masks are needed in depressurized planes in the midst of a crisis. That is not wellness. It’s crisis management. Medical culture says it's ok to care for yourself in a crisis. It's a worthwhile endeavor to keep yourself from passing out. Putting on your oxygen mask can be a first step.

But there is much more to wellness, health, and contentment than this.

What's needed for longevity as a healer is full body, mind, and spiritual nourishment. When we are replete as physicians, parents and humans, we are able bring our best to the world and others. This shouldn't be the exception. It should be the norm.

What would it look like to take care of yourself beyond an oxygen mask? If no one were judging, and it didn't take a crisis to simply pause and breathe, what would you do to care for yourself well? What do you need to be healthy and feel alive?

What do you want for your life?

What feels good? If you are this capable when you are depleted, exhausted, burnt out, stretched, and irritable, imagine what might happen if you were replete? A loving nudge to let go of the oxygen mask analogy and instead commit to and invest in true wellness for yourself.

Every human deserves to be well. Even you.

Jessie Mahoney is a Pediatrician, a certified life coach for physicians, and a yoga instructor. She is the Chair of the SFMMS Physician Wellness Task Force. She practiced Pediatrics and was a Physician Wellness leader at Kaiser Permanente for 17 years. She is the founder of Pause and Presence Coaching where she supports and empowers her physician colleagues using mindfulness tools and mindset coaching. She specializes in helping ease career transitions and burnout, parenting struggles, and relationship challenges. She is a leader of the Mindful Healthcare Collective and is co-host of the Mindful Healers Podcast. She teaches virtual weekly yoga to physicians and other healthcare providers and leads yoga, coaching, and wellness retreats in spectacular natural locations. You can read her blog at www.jessiemahoneymd.com. You can connect with her at jessie@jessiemahoneymd.com.

Wellness Retreats Continue to Make A Difference for SFMMS

“Connecting with an amazing group of fellow physicians, learning skills, laughing, and restoring. Thank you for this amazing healing and restorative experience!!”

– SFMMS Member, TPMG Physician, and Retreat Attendee

Using physician wellness funding from CMA and Sutter Health, SFMMS sponsored members to attend the Honoring Diastole Wellness Retreat at Pie Ranch in September. SFMMS Wellness plans on continuing these sponsorships in 2023. Honoring Diastole at Pie Ranch is a day-long retreat that includes yoga, meditation, reflective writing, coaching, a tour of the sustainable farm. The highlight of the day is a farm-to-table lunch prepared by the staff at Pie Ranch, and a coaching session to optimize your wellness.

Why should you attend?

“Gail and Jessie – a heartfelt thank you to you both.

I attended my 1st retreat with you at Pie Ranch on March 26.

I attended that retreat because I “won” a raffle sponsored by the SFMMS (SF Marin Medical Society). Little did I realize what

I had truly won!

That retreat happened at just the right time for me. As the Buddha said, “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear”.

Thank you for being my teachers and guides on this beautiful journey of self-discovery and growth.

Going back this past Saturday was wonderful and made even more meaningful because I was able to share the experience with my friend and mentor, Laura.

You both have a gift and I am so grateful you choose to share this with people like myself.” – SFMMS Member & TPMG Physician

Upcoming LOCAL Physician Wellness CME Retreat Opportunities: 2023 Dates

Connect in Nature Mindful Healers Retreat: July 14-16th, 2023 Honoring Diastole Retreat: February, March, September 2023

Nourish & Transform: A 4-5 night all-inclusive intimate physician wellness retreat opportunity for women physicians in Santa Margarita CA. Find out more and sign up here: https://www.jessiemahoneymd.com/retreats.

Stay tuned for more SFMMS Membership retreat sponsorships in early 2023.

OTHER UPCOMING WELLNESS OPPORTUNITIES Mindful Yoga for Healers

A quarterly weekend offering of free Mindful Yoga for Healers. This is specifically for SFMMS members to join their colleagues in order to heal, replenish, restore, and connect! Sign up at https://mindfulyoga.jessiemahoneymd.com/ to be notified of class dates and times.

Stay tuned for our 2023 outdoor in-person yoga option. Date TBD.

Have you missed a recent Wellness Event? You can learn more about upcoming wellness events or view recordings of past events on the SFMMS Wellness Page at www.sfmms.org/get-help/physician-wellness.