Should I Move My Parents into Senior Living Before or after the Holidays?

By Emily Havens, Director of Sales and Marketing, Ovation Sienna Hills

Carol, a school teacher eager to reach retirement and celebrate being a new grandmother, is preparing for two major life changes: retirement and looking to place her mother, Amelia, into a senior living community.

What does your ideal retirement lifestyle look like? For Carol, her ideal retirement looks like European vacations and road trips in her newly renovated motorhome. It looks like spending the summer in Idaho with her children and new grandbaby. It looks like doing all of the things she’s wanted to do by staying physically and mentally active.

However, Carol’s reality looks like the opposite of her retirement dreams. After months of worrying about her mother living alone in her own home, Carol recently decided to move Amelia in with her. Amelia, diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s disease, had started to struggle with the daily tasks of cooking and keeping her home clean, and she had been experiencing short-term memory loss. As the only child among her siblings who lived close to Amelia, Carol found the role of caregiver landing solely on her shoulders.

According to Aging Care, the average duration of caregiving can last 4.5 years, and 29 percent of caregivers have been in this role for five years or longer. While Carol feels it’s important to care for her mother, she also knows that she is neglecting other areas of her life, such as her friendships and her financial well-being. She also fears missing out on her new grandbaby’s milestones.

Carol is torn; she feels a great deal of pressure to care for Amelia, yet she can’t let “caregiving” be the sole purpose of her life. With the holidays approaching, looking into senior living seems even more daunting than usual.

When looking into senior living for a loved one this season, consider these tips:

1. Make calls and ask questions before taking on-site tours.

Save time and frustration by calling senior living communities and asking key questions before scheduling a visit. Some important initial questions include pricing, levels of care, nursing access, and size of apartment homes.

2. Don’t prolong the inevitable.

It might initially sound great to wait until the new year to help your parents move into senior living, but It’s very easy for a few months to turn into a year. Putting off the decision may not only increase dread for your loved one, it could also cost a spot at your favorite community.

3. Seek outside support.

Say “yes” as often as you can when others offer to help. Share your feelings with a counselor, another family member, a support group, or another caregiver in a similar situation. Remember, you are not alone!

About the Author

Emily Havens is the Executive Community Relations Director for Ovation Sienna Hills. Prior to developing her marketing career, Emily spent three years at The Spectrum and Daily News as a local journalist. Emily has garnered several awards from the Associated Press, Utah Press Association, and Nevada Press Association. In addition to her contributions to journalism and the digital marketing world, Emily is also a local nonprofit chapter president.