It’s Time to Check In on Your Mental Well-Being

By Matt Eschler, PhD, LMFT

There is a little time before the longer nights of fall and winter bring an earlier sundown, leaving you in the dark during more of your waking hours. More than likely, you will notice mood and lifestyle changes that come with a shift in the daylight hours. You may stay inside a little more often, and you may notice some seasonal affective sadness that shows up as the nights get longer.

In preparation for the months ahead, I suggest that you take a moment and do a mental health “check-in” just to be certain that you are balanced in your approach to life and that you’re not getting off track with your well-being. If you have a spouse or partner, it could be super romantic for both of you to take some time to do a check-in and then share the results and ideas with each other.

The following five check-in points will give you a solid idea about your mental well-being.

1. How am I feeling today?

Do I believe that joy is possible, and how joyful are my experiences today? When we have a belief that we deserve joy and that it is within our power to feel it, we can be more resilient in difficult times, especially as we understand that the difficulties will cause growth and pass us off into joy at some point in the future. This is important to assess. If we have lost faith that we are deserving of joy or if we believe that we don’t have the ability to have joy, we may need a little coaching or therapy.

2. Am I doing the basics of physical and emotional self-care?

How is my food intake helping me thrive? Do I eat regular meals with healthy content? Are my sleep habits and sleep hygiene adequate for me to feel rested? Do I exercise at least thirty minutes four to five times a week? These are all super healthy check-in questions on your basic needs.

3. Am I worried about something lately?

Do a quick breathing exercise and consider things that are unresolved and weighing on your mind. Ask yourself if you have any control over the solution. Is it your issue or is it another person’s issue? Can you be more tolerant of a situation or can you have a conversation with someone to get this worry off your mind? Many times we find we are being overwhelmed by avoiding an issue or by taking on an issue that isn’t ours to solve.

4. Am I being accountable for my happiness and peace?

Ask yourself what you are doing to bring joy, happiness, and peace into your life. Currently there is a huge push in the counseling industry for self-care. I would agree that balanced self-care is extremely important. Setting boundaries around saying yes to adding tasks to your to-do list, dedicating a portion of your time to self-care, giving service to others, and seeking a higher power and spiritual growth are all elements of joy. How are you actually maintaining a balance in this area of happiness?

5. Do I have a solid support team that I can call on when I need help, advice, or a listening ear?

Having a couple of individuals that you trust to show up when you are in need is a key to feelings of safety and security in a messy world. You want to identify your support team’s specific strengths and seek them out when you are in need. These relationships tend to be reciprocal or professional. For example, a best friend that you lean on will likely, in turn, ask you for similar responses when they require assistance. However, a therapist or clergy member will not call on you when they need assistance, but they may not be as readily available outside business hours or outside of their callings. Understanding the people on your team and how to seek their advice is the key to having a great experience.

Doing a mental health check-in is empowering and will inform you about what may be keeping you from experiencing joy and peace. Strengthen areas that require a little work; build into your experience anything that you found was missing from your life as you reviewed the list above. I guarantee it will be worth your time and attention.

About the Author

Matt lives in St. George, Utah, where he and his wife, Chris, are enjoying their life with each other. Since their children have grown up and moved out to pursue their dreams, Matt and Chris travel the world. They want to visit 200 countries before they are done. Matt and Chris are active in their community and enjoy working out, training for marathons, and spending time participating in numerous activities with their adult children. Matt received a PhD in psychology. He is focused on the arena of resolving personal conflicts and improving interpersonal relationships. In addition to his doctorate degree, Matt has earned a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, studied criminal justice and received a category one license with Peace Officer Standards and Training, and received a degree in the Arts of Business Management. Matt is a professor at Dixie State University and hopes to be part of the positive growth of southern Utah.