Boycott Deowry Weddings

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Join The Jihad If We Really Love Our Prophet Muhammad SAWS

Boycott Marriages Where Dowry or Dinner Is Taken From the Bride's Parents

Dr. Aleem Khan Falaki Translation by: Shaik Ahmed Ali Socio-Reforms Society


THE CALLOF THE HOUR · Boycott all marriages where Dowry and Reception Dinner are taken from the Bride's side as these acts are un-Islamic · Minimize 2-day ceremonies to one day · If party is inevitable on the first day, let the groom side host Walima in advance. · Those who have taken the dowry and dinner must return the cost. If they were taken willingly, it was bribe. Else, it was Amanat (Safe Keeping) · Instead of funding marriages of poor girls, encourage dowry-free weddings by helping the deserving to youth pay net Meher. · Perform all marriages in mosques. At least one mosque in every locality must be expanded with separate seating arrangements for women during Nikah. · Boycott all celebrities who attend extravagant marriages.


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Dedicated to All the Ulemas, Intellectuals, Social Workers, Organizations and those individuals who are waging the war against the dowry system through their tongue and pen. and To all those courageous grooms and their parents who have set examples of Ideal Islamic Marriage.

May Allah Bestow His Blessings On You all (Ameen).


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Foreword

Now, this lawsuit is in the court of the conscience of the readers. Today every reader is a judge. After going through all the evidences and witnessing the grim consequences of the present day’s weddings, if your conscience raises the voice in favor of what is written here, you are kindly requested to support the mission to establish the real Islamic model of marriages. Unless you develop the spirit and courage to boycott the invitations of marriages where the dowry or dinner is taken from the bride’s side, the society will never change. In the following article you will find how the Quran and Seerat stress upon rejecting the invitations if they damage the morality of Islam.

People often raise the following questions: • • • • • •

Accepting the invitation is the tradition of the Prophet SAWS, how can we refuse? If someone is giving dowry or hosting dinner willingly by consent (Khushi se), why is it illegitimate? Is it a part of our faith to adopt the culture of the Prophet SAWS? How can we keep the guests hungry who travel a long distance to attend marriage? The Prophet SAWS, of course, did not practice these acts but did he prohibit them? If the earnings not spent on own children, what is the use of the earnings?

The answers to the above questions are given with the proof from moral as well as Shariya point of view.


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The practice of dowry being forbidden (Haraam) in Islam has been discussed in depth in our earlier publication “Mard bhi bikte hain… Jehez ke liye” (Men Too Are Sold...For Dowry). The scholars and experts of Islamic Jurisprudence representing all Sects and Schools of Thought have consensually opined that the dowry system is illegitimate in view of teachings of Holy Quran, Hadees and our revered scholars. Except for a few references, we have tried our best to avoid repetition of what expressed in earlier publication.

Why do people oppose this mission? Abu Jahl and Abu Lahb etc. knew very well that Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) was absolutely right but their ego and fear of losing leadership did not permit them to accept the truth. Therefore, as a last resort, they started propaganda against the Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) by calling him “A poet, mutineer against the way of forefathers, magician, etc., (NAOZBILLAH)”. People know very well that the dowry and dinners taken from bride’s side are not legitimate but since they are practicing it for years together, they are addicted to it. Therefore, instead of repenting, they start negative propaganda. They do not hesitate to misuse “Aqeeda, Maslak and Jamaat etc” as a prejudice against this mission. Although they praise this mission in public but when they are with their mates, they start backbiting. Reject the references as poor, weak or Dayeef. Most of the time, they do it covertly. They do not change themselves, but try to change the Quran and Hadees to suit their wishes and their life style. Their Second trick is that very cleverly they create new topics and divert the attention like political parties from main topicto a vague subject. For instance, they argue that:

First we have to change the mindset…..


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There should be unanimity among the scholars first… There are issues more important than dowry ….. Dowry-free marriages are possible in the Arabs, not elsewhere….. Arabs too are involved in extravagance…. Instead of opposing dowry & dinner you should persuade the people to wed a poor girl too along with their own weddings….. People should spend according to their capacity. (Does it mean that the Prophet SAWS did not spend because he did not have capacity, but if someone has capacity he should be given liberty to spend unlike the Prophet SAWS). If it were illegitimate, how come our Ulema, Mufties, intellectuals etc are not only attending the ceremonies but also holding their own family weddings with the same standard of present system. People applythese tricks either due to lack of IQ or shortage of common sense. In fact, it is a cunning and clever attempt to escape from the obligations of Sunnat.

Our mission is to revive the “Mardanagi” (manhood) Women are primarily responsible for the continuance of this evil of dowry and dinners. They rarely realise that they are pushing their husbands and sons into a debt trap, bankruptcy and financial mess. They force them to arrange money by all means, legal or illegal, to conduct a marriage. If men become real 'Qawwam' (protectors), then it is not impossible to change the women. Those who cannot teach the women, they must remember Hazrat Omer’s warning that: “It is better for you to get buried than walk on earth if your decisions are in the hands of your women." However, it is wrong to blame women alone. There are men too who are responsible. They are slaves of their womenish desires and indulge in extravagant rituals. Many of them do not feel shy in asking the bride’s side to send the decorated car for the groom to reach the marriage hall. They actually replicate the ritual practiced by the mistresses and dancers who used to ask for the


5| decorated carts to come to the palaces of the courtiers and landlords. The Quran defines a MARD as the one who spends his money on his women. Not only after the marriage, but at the time of the marriage too. (6:34). If someone says that it is not possible to eradicate dowry from the society, then they are actually trying to convey that it is not possible to make the man a real MARD.

‍ ŘŻ Ű Ř§Řł  ďŽ&#x;   ďŽ&#x;‏

‍ Ůˆاز  Ůˆاز دے‏

!

We cannot promise to bring a revolution to your home from outside. But if you support this call and start boycott, we promise to spread this revolution from your home across the world, Insha’Allah.

I am thankful to brother Shaik Ahmed Ali for translating the book and Atiya Shakeeb for her contribution to covey this book to your hands. Jazakumullah.

Dr. Aleem Khan Falaki Socio Reforms Society aleemfalki@yahoo.com Facebook: Aleem Khan Falaki

5th September, 2014.


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The Basic Reasons That Make Dowry Forbidden (Haraam) In Islam:

1. Bribery:No parents can imagine marrying their daughter without giving any dowry.

2. Social Blackmail: Often people try to legitimise the system by referring to dowry as “Gift” or “Jahez Fatimi”. The practices which were originally optional in nature, have been made compulsory.

3. Beggary: Unlike regular begging, the dowry has been transformed into "Civilised Begging"

4. Imitation of Non-Muslim Culture: The lust for dowry has forced a major section of Muslim society to emulate the practices of non-believers.

5. Violation of Quran: Surah Nisa (34) says,"Men are in charge of women by what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend from their wealth." Surah Baqarah says, "And do not consume one another's wealth unjustly." (188) Surah Nisasays,"O you who have believed, do not consume one another's wealth unjustly but only [in lawful] business by mutual consent”. (28)


7| The practice of dowry is a clear violation of teachings of Holy Quran and an open confrontation against the above mentioned verses. Men were given superiority over women as they spend their money on the latter. But if women are forced to spend money on their marriages, then such men are trying to reverse the orders of Almighty Allah.

6. Male Prostitution: Dowry is a form of male prostitution wherein men don't marry girls without taking cash or valuables. While a few practice this in the name of tradition, others demand it shamelessly. The rates of such men are fixed based on their qualifications, designations and family backgrounds. The bride's parents too exhibit their skills in selection of groom and get them attracted. A few educated youth do not demand dowry. But their act of accepting the dowry and dinner meekly, under the pretext of the social system, confirms their approval on their rates.

7. "Persecution (al-fitna): The Holy Quran in Surah Baqarah has described "Persecution (Al-Fitnatu)" as worse than slaying. Dowry is the worst kind of persecution (Fitna) of modern time. It has pushed many Muslim girls on the wrong path. Men are bound to adopt illegal means to marry off their daughters or sisters. The Islamic laws of inheritance are being put to violation and misuse. Instead of investing the money on a business, the men are compelled to spend all their earnings on their sisters’ or daughters’ weddings. The lavish marriages are creating a desire and greed among others to emulate similar spending. The old parents are being robbed of their lifetime savings and forced to live in penury after their daughter's marriage. The murder of newly wed brides, harassment, divorces, strained relationship, feticide, abortions of baby girls, police and court cases are on the


8| rise.The female ratio in the population decreasing. Women’s Rights’ violation rising.

8. Increasing Shamelessness in Men: The dowry system has led to an alarming increase in the population of shameless men who are blind to the fact they have pushed bride's parents into severe debt/interest traps. The grooms are aware that the brides are wedded by the help of donations, Zakat and charity; still they do not feel shy to accept a ‘would-be mother of their generation come in their home with the help of charity’.

9. Violation of Kafa':In contrast to the fact that men take care of the financial needs of women after marriage, their dependence on women for dowry in shape of cash, valuables and household articles at the time of marriage is a complete violation of “Kafa’at” or being “Kafu”. It is must for a man to bear the expenses at the time of marriage too. Else, the man does not qualify to be the KAFU (Par) with the woman. (The Details Are Ahead).

10. It Is Extravagance: Everything which was not practiced by the Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) or his companions but invented later is extravagance which is declared Haraam in 17:27. It is prohibited in Islam to spend lavishly and waste money. Many a rituals barrowed from other religions fall under the category of “Israaf&Tabzeer” which are utterly Haraam. (The details are ahead).

11. It is pomp and vanity: There are Hardly 5 to 10% people who can easily afford this extravagance but they are the main


9| culprits responsible for destroying the morale of the entire society. They set wrong precedents of pompous marriages which lure others for emulation. They are the ones who invented the argument of "Consensual Practice of Dowry" while pushing everyone into the swamp of greed, showoff and immorality. 12. The doors of Dawa blocked: Hadthe Muslims’ weddings been sermonized according to the way of the Prophet SAWS, it would have opened the doors to millions of non-Muslims to get inspired as they are suffering badly due to the dowry system. Instead of opening the doors to them, everyone who is indulged in this heinous sin has blocked the doors of Islam and gave the opportunity to the enemies to mock at Islamic wedding system.

Is Boycott Necessary? Decide Yourself

Does this question arise in your mind when you begin planning for the wedding of your children:

"The wedding ceremony will be same like the Prophet SAWS’s, Ali & Fatima (RZ)’s and the Sahaba’s Or

"It will be like the pompous marriages being performed by your relatives, celebrities or non-believers as per the existing traditions and customs."


10 | Has it happened to you that though you were in favour of a simple Islamic marriage, but your views were vetoed by women or other members of your family who played the role of a Mufti and forced you to surrender like an obedient husband, father or father-in-law? Have you ever realized how long our Prophet SAWS would have stayed in such weddings if he had graced the occasion personally?

Chose your option between Islamic marriage and Non-Islamic marriage Islamic Marriage: Nikah should be pronounced in mosque; Bride be departed from the mosque itself without any transit at Marriage Hall. Groom must pay MEHR and arrange all the dowry items by his own income, Host the Walima next day, as per his capacity. If it is inevitable to avoid the relatives and well-wishers on the first day itself, then Groom must host the Walima in advance on the same day of Nikah. If the bride’s side want to include their guests, they can share the expenses. This will enable not only the bride’s side but whole community to act upon the order of the Prophet SAWS who said: “Make the Nikah so much easy that adultery become difficult”. This will also help people save time and money of attending two separate parties of the same marriage.

Non-Islamic marriage: Host groom’s guests at the expense of bride’s father at a marriage hall. Get all the dowry items in advance from the bride’s parents.


11 | Host the Walima dinner the next day only to compete with the first-day dinner Make the bride’s side spend several times more than the amount of Mehr. If the groom’s side refuses to take any dowry or dinner, insist for it. Eventually, the groom’s side pretend to be innocent by saying “we were not willing, but the bride’s people did not agree”.

Test of Iman: When you receive an invitation card of a marriage, which you are aware is being performed with all the evils mentioned above including food from bride's parents, extravagance and non-Islamic rituals, and if you remain inert, please recall the Hadith of Holy Prophet (SAWS) in which he directed the angels to first destroy those pious people who did not react despite witnessing evils in open violation of orders of Allah. If you are not prepared to react against these evils, then you have to be mentally prepared for the day when the punishment will descend upon you. Your Son-in-laws will take away the earnings of your lifetime and your own sons will be forced to live in penury by doing odd jobs. You yourself will be living in misery at the far end of your lives due to old age and less income. Your daughter-in-laws will govern over your sons and you will watch them helplessly.

A question to Ulema and educated elite There is an important question which all the contemporary scholars, jurisprudents, Mashaekh, leaders and intellectuals are obliged to answer. They themselves have witnessed weddings which have shattered the differentiation between Haraam and Halaal. They know very well that their admonitions of simplicity fall on deaf ears. In such a situation, they are left with only two options: Either boycott marriages if they are wrong or become a part of the negligent crowd that has accepted such marriages. There is no third option except


12 | hypocrisy. The good and evil cannot go along together. It is completely immoral to lack courage to boycott something which you believe is wrong and un-Islamic. Is it the fear of severing of relations with your kin, friends, disciples, potential donors or supporters responsible for your silence? By seeking exception for yourself in such matters, are you not trying to legitimise the immoral practice for the entire community?

Marriage System in the Muslim countries: In most of the Muslim countries like Arabs, Malaysia, Indonesia or Nigeria the couple go to the court along with the Wali and the witnesses to perform the Nikah. The groom furnishes the home to welcome the bride. He hosts all the guests at his own expense. Sometimes the bride’s parents share the expenses of their guests. After the ceremony, the bride is departed. In all of these countries, the Walima is regarded as just an announcement of the marriage. They follow the Hadith: “Walima on the first day is confirmed (Haq), and on the second day, it is good (Ma’ruf), and on the third day, it is show off.” [AbuDaud]. But in India, Pakistan and Bangladesh the weddings are made difficult by putting the condition of consummation before the Walima.

Standard wedding (Meyarishaadi) The groom’s side often pretends to be generous and say they want no dowry except only a “Standard dinner”.The trick to legitimize the dowry or the dinner is the contention of “By consent (KHUSHI SE). This phrase is presented as the biggest proof to legitimise it. It is cheating as they know very well that the bride’s side who is bearing the expenses of hosting hundreds of people will not minimize the dowry. Thus knowing fully well that everything will be given without asking, they usually do not bargain for the dowry. In a few instances, the mother or father of the bride plays the role of a villain by imposing the dowry and dinner on the groom’s side who


13 | by all means want to avoid it. The women often dominate and men become helpless and start searching for Fatwa. They get Fatwa too easily across the street.

Is it legitimate to boycott the invitation? From Shariya point of view, it is not only allowed but strictly instructed. People do remember those traditions of the Prophet SAWS which help them to fill the stomach but they do not remember the traditions which strictly prohibit accepting such invitations. Let us see the attitude of our Prophet SAWS, his companions and the noble sages. 1.[١٥٢]

ِ ِ َ ِ ِ ِ ‫ﻮن‬ َ ‫ون ِ ﰱ ْ ٱﻷ َ ْر ِض َ و َﻻ  ﻳُ ْﺼﻠ ُﺤ‬ َ ‫[ٱﻟَّﺬﻳ َﻦ  ﻳُ ْﻔﺴ ُﺪ‬١٥١] ‫ﲔ‬ َ ‫“ َو َﻻ   ُﺗﻄ ُﻴﻌﻮٓا۟  أ ْﻣ َﺮ  ٱ ْﳌُ ْﺴ ِﺮﻓ‬

Do not follow the extravagant people. They are the ones who spread chaos on the earth. They are not the reformers”.(Al Shoura). This verse clearly prohibits complying with those who like lavishness. Neither their invitations should be accepted nor should we desire to follow their acts in the marriages as they are extravagant people who spoil the moral values of the society. They occupy respectable positions

like

leaders,

intellectuals,

businessmen

and

sometimes as religious gurus. They do not hesitate to gather thousands of people in their marriages and violate the teachings of Prophet SAWSopenly.In Islam there is no concept of "Baraat" (large gathering). This is a non-Muslim practice to gather crowds in the ceremonies.

ِ ِ ْ ‫َ  ٱﻟ‬-َ.  ۟‫“وﺗَﻌَﺎوﻧُﻮا‬Cooperate in virtues ِ ْ َ-َ.  ۟‫ﱪ َ وٱﻟﺘَّ ْﻘ َﻮ ٰى ◌ۖ   َو َﻻ  ﺗَﻌَ َﺎوﻧُﻮا‬ 2.[٥:٢] ِ‫ﺪ َٰون‬ ْ ‫ ٱﻹﺛ ِْﻢ َ وٱﻟ ْ ُﻌ‬ َ َ ّ

and do not cooperate in the acts of Sins”. It has become like faith to join every party to please the inviter without visualising the way the party is being organized, legitimate or not. People do not want to hurt the host even at the cost of hurting the Prophet SAW’s traditions.


14 | 3.  â€ŤŮˆŘ°ďť&#x;ďŽ? اﺿďťŒďť’â€ŹŘŒ;â€Ťâ€†Ůˆâ€†ان ďť&#x;â€†ďťłďş´ďş˜ďť„ďťŠâ€†ďť“ďş’ďť˜ďť ďş’â€ŹŘŒ;‍ ﺎن ďť&#x;â€†ďťłďş´ďş˜ďť„ďť´ďťŠâ€†ďť“ďş’ďť ďş´ďşŽâ€ŹŘŒâ€ŤďťŁďťŚâ€†عأŰŒâ€† ﺎا ﺎďť&#x;ďť´ďť?ď˛‘Ű â€†ďş‘ďť´ďşŞŰ â€Ź

‍  ﺣﺪďşšâ€ŹŘŒâ€Ťďť°    اďłŒﺎ    اďł?ﺎن‏J‍  ﺑﺎن  ďŽ?ن  اďť&#x;â€ŹŘŒâ€Ť  اďł?ďşŽŮ†â€ŹŘŒâ€Ťďşťďş¤ďť´ďş˘ â€†ďťŁďş´ďť ďť˘â€ŹG‘‘  ‍ اďł?ﺎن‏means

“Whoever see any sinful act You must stop it by his hand;If not possible, then by tongue, and if that is not possible, then hate it at heart. That is the last stage of Iman." This Hadees very clearly sanctions to boycott the events if they are against Islam and use maximum power to stop them. One can stop by hand to those upon whom he can raise hand too. It is a pity that people use their hand outside their homes on less important religious issues in the mosques, but bow down to their wife at home. Is it the reason that we cannot stop our wives from going in the dowryridden weddings just because she too had brought dowry with her, consequently she has the right to rule over us? 4. An incident is reported that once Hazrat Ali (RZ) invited the Prophet SAWS on meals. When Prophet SAWS entered the home, he saw an objectionable thing and returned immediately. There can be no other bigger proof that Prophet SAWS himself has boycotted his own daughter’s invitation. (Sunan, Nisai, IbnMaja, MasnadAbiyali quoted by Mubashir Ahmed Rabbani in “aapkemasael�) 5.

Another instance from

says

that the

daughter Fatima (RZ) came running to bring the father back but he refused saying “It is against the tradition of the Prophets to enter a place which is adorned with unlikable things�. Then it is not reported in the books of Hadees that the Prophet SAWS had returned for the meals. 6.Said by the Prophet SAWS

â€˜â€˜â€Ťďťž â€†ďťƒďťŒďşŽﺎ‏T‍ﺒﺎعﺎن    ﳚﺎﺑﺎن   ٴ‏Wâ€Ťâ€œ ’’اďłŒâ€ŹDo not

accept those invitations which are hosted in competition, nor eat thereâ€?. ‍ ﺸ ٰ؊‏


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7. HazratOmer(RZ)

says about the boycott of the invitations, “I

heard the Prophet SAWS saying  ‍ ﺎﺋﺪ؊ ﺗﺪاع‏-. ‍ﺎن  ٴ ﺑﺎďť&#x;ďť ;â€†Ůˆاďť&#x;م اﺧﺎ â€†ďť“ďťźâ€†ďťłďť˜ďťŒﺪ‏T ‍‏

011 "# $ %& ' () *+ ,- ./ ! ŘŒâ€ŤďťŁďş´ďť¨ďşŞâ€†اﲪﺪ‏Gâ€Ťďť ﺎ اďł‹ﺎ‏.

“Whoever believes in Allah and the Day of Judgment must not sit on any food where wine is served�. According to the jurisprudence’s rules of application “Tahqeeq-e-Manat�, this boycott is not limited to wine only but it applies to every party where the evils (Munkarat) are involved. 8.A companion of the Prophet SAWS Abu Wael (RZ) went to attend a Walima and found that people are wasting time in entertainment, singing and dancing. He returned immediately and said, “Singing

f‍ ďŽ?ďş˜ďşŽب ادبâ€ŹŘŒâ€Ťâ€†ﺡﺎح ﺳ اﰉ داŮˆŘŻâ€ŹŘŒâ€Ťďť‹ن اďłŒďťŒďş’د‏G produces hypocrisy in the hearts.

9. A person invited Hazrat Abdullah bin Omer (RZ) in a Walima. He (RZ) went there and saw that the wall was adorned with the colorful curtains. He said “Since how long you have set the Kaaba in your home�? And he asked his pupils to tear away the curtains. This is not only the ideal example of boycott, but a precedent set for boycott in protest. (Fathul Bari) 10.

Hazarat Abdullah Bin Masood (RZ) went to attend a dinner.

But he turned back after noticing pictures decorated in the home. The host then apologised and tore away all the pictures. Only then he entered the home again. ' 2 3 4 11.

Imam Awzaisays :

‍’’  ﺪﺧďťž â€†Ůˆďť&#x;؊  ﺎ â€†ďťƒďş’ďťž â€†Ůˆďťť  ďťŒﺰا٠‏

“We never

used to enter any Walimawhere there were musical instruments� 5

0BB ‍ آداب اďť&#x;ﺰﺎ٠ ďť&#x;ďť ďş¸ďť´ďşŚâ€†اďť&#x;ﺒﺎďą?â€ŹŘŒâ€Ť اďť&#x;ďť”اďş‹ﺪ اďłŒďşœďť˜ďşŽŘŠâ€†اﰉ اﳊﺲ اﳊﺎﰉ‏9: ; < => ? @A 867

12.

Abu Ayyub Ansari (RZ) was invited by another companion of

the Prophet SAWS Saalim Bin Abdullah (RZ). He became very upset to see that the walls were covered with green curtains. Saalim (RZ) said “We were insisted by the women to do it�. Abu Ayyub (RZ) said “I was afraid that somebody else may do it but I had not expected


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that you would do it. By God, I will not eat at your home. He returned back without eating. f‍ ﺑﺎب  ﺎďş&#x; اذا عاŰŒâ€†ﺎا ﰹ د؊â€ŹŘŒâ€ŤďşŽŘ­â€Źq‍ ďŽ?ďş˜ďşŽب اďť&#x;â€ŹŘŒâ€Ťď˛žďşŽŘąŰŒâ€ŹG

13.

Anas Bin Malik (RZ) went to some Majoosis(Iranians) on their

invitation. They served curd in a glass of silver. He refused to drink it. When they changed the glass, then only he consumed it.

0C ;‍ ﲢ؊ اďť&#x;ďťŒﺎŮˆŘłâ€†ďşťďť”ﺤâ€ŹŘŒâ€†tJ‍)ﺑ‏ 14.

Osman Bin Al Aas (RZ) was invited in the celebration of a

circumcision. He refused to accept and said, “There used to be no party on such occasions during the period of Prophet SAWS and we never used to attend themâ€?.(0C1 Bâ€ŤďşŁďşŞďťłďşšâ€ŹŘŒâ€Ťâ€†ﺴﺪ اďť&#x;ﺸﺎď˛”â€ŹŘŒâ€Ť)ﺴﺪ اﲪﺪ‏ 15.Huzaifa Bin Al Yaman (RZ) was invited for a Walima. He observed that people were wearing dresses not identical with Islam. In protest, he walked out and said

“Whoever imitates the other

5 G‍  ﺗﺸďş’;â€†ďş‘ďť˜م  ‏5communities, he will be counted among themâ€?. J K L& J MD E F G H I < ‍ اďť—ďş˜ďť€ďşŽŘĄâ€†اďť&#x;ﺟﺎاء اďłŒďş´ďş˜ďť˜‏ 16.

Imam Ahmed Bin Hanbal was invited for a function. He saw

a chair which was decorated with silver. He turned back immediately. The host came running and caught his hand. He slapped him. (In another report it is said He hitched his

â€ŤŘ˛ŰŒ  اďłŒďş â€Ź hand)andsaid â€˜â€˜â€Ťâ€†زŰŒ  اďłŒďş ďťŽŘłâ€ŹŘŒâ€ŤďťŽŘłâ€Ź Ů’ Ů’ ’’ This is the imitation of Majoosis.

QR S! T ! U V' W X Y Z O P 0N ;‍ اďť—ďş˜ďť€ďşŽŘĄâ€†اďť&#x;ﺟﺎاء اďť&#x;ďş´ďş˜ďť˜ از اďş‘ ﺗ; ﺝﺤ‏

Wish that we too have such courageous Ulema in our society. It is not necessary to slap the host. But, we can at least condemn him by words on imitating the non-Islamic rituals in our wedding parties. 17.

Imam Abu Hanfia says that if the host is tyrant and

adulterer, his invitation Is not Halaal. When it is not Halaal for himself, how can it be Halaal for others? Imam Sahfai’e says that “Acceptance of the invitation of Walima is subjected to:


17 | 1. Invitation is not confined to the rich and elite. 2. Host not having some hidden intention and most importantly, 3. Host is not Zaalim or Faasiq (who openly violates Shariya) or immersed in formalities. 4. The function is not arranged by using Haraam income. The invitation should not be accepted if any one of the above condition is violated. Further, he says, “If the place of Walima and its atmosphere is against the Shariya, the acceptance of the invitation is not obligatory and becomes nullified.

[B QR S! T ! U V' W X Y Z O P 0N ;â€ŤŘ§ďť—ďş˜ďť€ďşŽŘĄâ€†اďť&#x;ﺟﺎاء اďť&#x;ďş´ďş˜ďť˜ از اďş‘ ﺗ; ﺝﺤ‏

Disobey even Parents if they order for evils Although Islam strictly orders for the obedience of the parents, it becomes obligatory to disobey them if they ask you to practice evils which are prohibited. As Quran says: â€˜â€˜â€Ťďť â€†ďť“ďťźâ€†ďş—ďť„ďťŒﺎ‏. ;‍ â€™â€™Ůˆان ďş&#x;ﺎﺪڊ ďť&#x;ďş˜ﺸﺎڊ ﰉ ďť&#x;|ﺲ ďť&#x;ďŽ? ﺑ‏If they tempt you to equalize Allah with somebody which you do not know, Do not listen to them. (Surah Ankaboot) In the matters of weddings, people indulge in Shirk by violating the the Quran which asks men to spend on women. But parents usually go for the prestige in the society. They do not care the prestige in the eyes of Allah as they are afraid that their ego will be dented if they do not follow the system. Therefore, in such cases where parents are insisting their sons to get involved in worldly rituals in the weddings, the groom are strictly asked by Quran to disobey the parents.

JamaNizamiya’s Mufti Khaleel Ahmed Sahab’s Fatwa Mufti sahab’s Fatwa is a bold, courageous and an eye opener for everyone. In his reply to a question on accepting the invitations of pompous grand marriage functions published in Siasat Urdu Daily


18 | (Dated 21st September, 2011), he said, "Accepting the invitation of the Walima is compulsory if it does not involve any extravagance, useless activities and sinful entertainment”. Further, he says, “This instruction is for common men. If the evils are stopped they can go and have meals. But for the scholars and Mashaeq, who are considered as leaders, if they are not in a position to stop these evils, they must return immediately from such parties after learning about them. If they knew about them in advance, they should not attend. Irrespective of whether they are common men or Masha’eq or scholars, it is illegitimate to attend such parties which are being hosted to exhibit the ego, prestige, vanity and show off." In the light of the above, it is important to know the exact nature of evils (Munkarat) involved in the weddings. First of all, it is the extravagance which has been declared Haraam in chapter

ِ ِ ‫ َ ﻟﺸَﻴﻄـ‬T‫ﲔ ◌ۖ  و‬ ِ ِ BaniIsrael ‫ﻮرا‬ َ َ ِ ‫َﺎﻧُﻮٓا۟ إِ ْﺧ َﻮٰا َن  ٱﻟ ّﺸَﻴ َٰـﻄ‬T  ‫“ إ َِّن  ٱ ْﳌُﺒ َ ّﺬرِﻳ َﻦ‬The extravagant ً ۭ ‫ﺎن  ٱ ّ ْ َ ٰ ُﻦ  ﻟ َﺮ ِﺑّﻪۦ  َﻛ ُﻔ‬ are the brothers of Shaitan, Shaitan has been unthankful to his Lord”. The extravagance is of two types. 1. Israaf: (Lavishness). To spend more money on necessity than it actually requires. 2. Tabzeer: to create a necessity which is not genuine and spend on it All the rites and rituals adopted these days in the weddings can be categorized as Israaf or Tabzeer like engagement party, (Paon mess), Reception dinner, gathering large number of guests, invitation cards, clothe for bride and groom which are hardly used again, dowry, Sanchak, Mayon, musical entertainments, fireworks, formal gifts etc. Haraam. (For details pls see ahead “Tahqeeq-eManat”)


19 |

First JahezFatimi or Mehr-Ali? Whatever the Prophet SAWS had given in the marriage of Hazrat Fatima (RZ) was purchased from the Mehr’s amount paid by Hazrat Ali (RZ) who had sold his sword but people deliberately hide this point to legitimise the dowry taken from the bride’s money. Such people must realize that if suppose the Jahez Fatimi is legitimate, it becomes obligatory first to pay the Mahr by selling valuable asset of the groom. People tend to collet dowry which is many times more than what they pay as Mahr. They don't realise that Jahez Fatimi was hardly 10% of the amount of the Mehr. Have we ever heard or seen a groom who sold his car or any other valuables to pay the Mehr? Secondly, if taking dowry is legitimate on the basis of JahezFatimi, it should become legitimate only if the groom is an orphan and brought up by the father-in-law as was in the case of Hazrat Ali (RZ). Are all grooms orphans? Were they brought up by their would-be father-in-law?

Fatwa of the biggest Mufti; Fiqha‫ ﺗﻔﻘ;  ﰱ  اﻟﺪﻳﻦ‬means “Common Sense”. The biggest Mufti is your own conscience. According to the Prophet SAWS,

‘‘‫ﻮی  ﻫﻬﻨﺎ‬ ٰ ‫’’اﻟﺘﻘ‬

“Taqwa is here”. He SAWS pointed at the chest by putting his hands on his chest. In another tradition He said ‘‘‫“ ’’اﺳﺘﻔﺖ ﺑﻘﻠﺒﮏ‬Ask your heart”.

Does your conscience allow you to accept such invitations? Are these dinners given by the bride’s side really by willingness of true heart? Are the hosts not compelled to take loans on interest or beg for charity or commit immoral acts to earn money? Don’t you realize how much hardship one has to go through in earning so much of amount to pay for the dinner of the groom’s guests and the dowry?


20 | Without sensing these factors, how does your conscience allow you to eat such meals prepared from income from doubtful sources? Don't you ponder over the participation in such parties before attending them?

A question to the Halaal meat seekers Some people are too concerned about eating Halaalfood. They search for the shops that sell only Halaal meat. They don't even taste the food unless they're sure of meat being Halaal. Another set of people often argue over the food of Fateha, Giyarhween, Meelad, Urs, Mannat etc., being Halaal or not. While one group advocates the legitimacy of such food items, the other counters their claim with their set of arguments. Such concerns clearly show the people's resolve to eat only Halaal food. We must appreciate their anxiety for Halaal food.

In view of such serious concerns, such people need to answer as to why they do not raise similar suspicions when they attend marriage functions. Their concerns simply get buried under the glamour of such weddings where the hosts try to impress with maximum number of dishes and extravagance. In a majority of cases, such expenditure is imposed upon the bride's father or brother by the groom or his family. However, the people who are concerned about Halaal food, why do they forget their principles for the sake of enjoying a dinner and become a part of an evil practice? They simply don't care whether the orders of Allah and teachings and practices of his Prophet SAWs are being violated. Will these Halaal meat seekers be forgiven on the doomsday on the excuse that they were not supposed to find the sources of funds for the marriage except for accepting the invitation?

Call for simplicity – a self deception "The dowry and marriage should be simple."This is yet another effective tool used by some people to deceive others and themselves. Since simplicity cannot be defined properly, they take full advantage of the terminology. The degree of simplicity


21 | varies from person to person depending upon his income, status and prevailing system. Prophet SAWS and his companions have already defined the criteria of simplicity in their lives. Therefore, anything which is not in accordance with the precedents set by Prophet SAWS is not simplicity. It is pure cheating and deception and, in fact, a hypocrisy. A poor man hates the rich, but wants to emulate them on spending in marriages. He lives a normal life every day but when it comes to marriages, he tries to copy the rich people. He complains while facing the burden of dowry and dinner on his daughter’s marriage but does not hesitate to impose similar or more burden on bride's parent when he marries off his sons.

Ulema’s opinion about Reception dinner & dowry Imam Abu Hanifa says, “It is not legitimate to burden the parents of the bride”. Abu Zohra, pupil of Imam Abu Hanifa says, “The house and the household items needed to start a new life are a responsibility of the groom.These things cannot be the replacement of the Mehr as the Mehr must be paid separately by consent. The Mehr must be in wife’s possession. There is no evidence in the Shariya to hold the woman’s side responsible for arranging the dowry”. ‫\اﻻﺣﻮال اﻟﺸﺨﺼﻴﺔ‬

FatawaAlamgiri supports this stand. It is written   ‫  ان‬-.  ‫ ﻻ  ﳚﻮز  ان  ﲡﱪ  اﳌﺮاة‬

‫ﻠ  ﻣﺎﺷﺎﺋﺖ۔‬T  ‫ﻠ  ﳍﺎ ﻓﻴ‬T ‫ “ﺗﺘﺠﻬﺰ اﻟﻴ  ﺑﺸﺊ اﺻﻼ ﻻ ﻣﻦ ﺻﺪاﻗﻬﺎ وﻻ ﻣﻦ  ﲑہ ﻣﻦ ﺳﺎﺋﺮ ﻣﺎﳍﺎ واﻟﺼﺪاق‬It is not legitimate at all to force the woman to bring the household items. Neither from her Mehr nor from any other source.Mehr is the right of the woman and she has liberty to use it”( page 317).

It is written In ;‫  ﻣﺬا ﺐ  ارﺑﻌ‬- .  ;‫ اﻟﻔﻘ‬that “It is obligatory on the man to arrange the house as well as all the needful. (Page 176). The capacity to spend by the man is a compulsory part of Kafa’at (equality). It is obligatory on the man to specify his capacity before


22 |

the marriage. He should clearly declare if he can arrange the furniture, bed, TV, house etc., on his own. If he expects these things to be given to him under the social system, it is against the rules of Kafa’at. The dowry given to him by the bride’s side does not qualify him to be “Kafu” (equal). Those who collect these things under the pretext of prevailing system, they violate this verse of  ‫]]ﻳ َ ٓـﺄَﻳُّﻬَﺎ ٱﻟ َّ ِﺬﻳ َﻦ ءَا َﻣﻨُﻮا۟ َ ﻻ‬

ٰ ‘‘‫ُﻠُﻮٓا۟ أ َ ْﻣ َٰﻮﻟ َ ُﻜﻢ ﺑَ|ْﻨ َ ُﻜﻢ ﺑِﭑﻟْﺒَـ ِﻄ ِﻞ‬Tْ‫ “ﺗَﺄ‬O believers; Do not eat each other’s earning ٰ

by improper ways” as the giver is paying due to a social blackmail. If we fail to eradicate this system, it will eliminate our moral and economic base completely as the dowry system has turned our Halaal earnings into Haraam. The only solution is to boycott all such marriages.

The dowry breaks the rules of inheritance. Although the 5-time prayer,fastingetcare mandatory for all Muslims but the Quran does not declare these acts as

‘‘;‫ ]]ﺗﻠﮏ  ﺣﺪود  اﻟﻠ‬means

“Limits or boundaries (Line of Contorl(LoC) in modern terminology)”. But the distribution of inheritance and its rules have been declared

as‘‘;‫]]ﺗﻠﮏ  ﺣﺪود  اﻟﻠ‬. People do not realize how the dowry system has shattered the laws of inheritance. The parents of the bride get compelled to spend so much willingly or unwillingly which otherwise could have become a capital for a business for the brothers of the bride. The sister takes away everything and the brothers are left with no option but to adopt inferior and undignified professions. Sometimes they end up in huge debts and pay interest for the loans taken by their parents for their sister's wedding. When the father dies and the assets are distributed, the sister claims her share. In many cases, the husband of the sister compels her to claim for her share though it is not legitimate for a husband to force her wife to claim her share from her parents. Anyway, at this time, the brothers avenge the sister and try to deprive her of her share. Such cases are in abundance in the courts.


23 | Giving away the rightful share of sons to the daughter is the first violation of Quran. Depriving the sisters of their share is the second violation. Both acts are not legitimate but due to the dowry system, this cannot be stopped. Therefore, it is inevitable to boycott the dowry ridden marriages as they are destroying the Shariya. People like to perform Nikah in the mosque like Prophet SAWS, collect dowry like Hindus, collect share of the inheritance as per Islamic Shariya and if their desire is not fulfilled, they go to the courts of Mr. Reddy or Mr. Rao and let the lawyers loot their Halaal savings. Therefore, why we should not tear away the invitation cards of such people who are spending on the marriages but it leads to break the Shariya rules?

Why not Walima be given on the first day itself? In the present age, it is a blatant lie if someone says he is offering Walima with the pure intention of acting upon Sunnat. There are strong reasons to suspect the intentions. If the Walima ceremony is purely meant to follow a Sunnat, then the whole function too ought to be hosted as per the Sunnat. In fact, the Walima has become just a formality. Just in the name of Sunnat, it has become a part of the whole marriage package which consists of several non-Islamic rituals like Reception dinner, dowry etc. No marriage is considered as marriage unless all the rituals are not ceremonised. Thus it is deceptive to label the Walima as Sunnat in the present day’s marriages. Since the Fiqh establishes any judgment on the basis of the “Ultimate Reason”, (Illat-e-Ghaaer), we must look at the Ultimate Reason of the Walima too wehter the Walima is an announcement of Nikah or announcement of consummation of marriage? If it is just an announcement of Nikah, then there is no time fixed to announce it. The groom can declare it on the same day of Nikah. If it is the announcement of intercourse, then it is not logical to announce it


24 | before it is confirmed. Then how the people print the “Walima Invitation Cards” prior to the confirmation of the mating? Fiqh or "" #$‫ ا‬%& ‫ " ('ہ‬is the common sense and easier to understand like the calculation of two plus two. But people have created so many improbable probabilities that Islam has become a complicated geometrical sum. A common man gets confused and instead of using his common sense, gets compelled to seek Maulvisahab for Fatwas as if he will be outcast from Islam if he did any mistake. Although there are hundreds of acts which show clear signs of exit from Islam, but people neglect them and chase the Sunnat of only Walima. If they believe that mating of couple was compulsory to host Walima, then they must also think of furnishing evidence of mating. There are several instances wherein Walima was hosted but the consummation of marriage could not be reached due to some reason. Were all those Walimas invalid? When it is obvious that when guests are not supposed to investigate these details, then Walima can be served any time, irrespective of the meeting of the couple. Except for India, Pakistan and Bangladesh, almost all the Muslim countries follow this rule. The Arabs too are practicing for last 1400 years though they are very sensitive about the virginity of the woman. In certain Beduin areas, there is a system that the man pays half of the Mehr in advance and remaining is paid next day on seeing the blood stains in the night. Still, the Walima is given on the same day of departure of the bride irrespective of meeting with groom as they believe that the meeting of the couple is not conditional to Walima. All Muslim countries follow the Hadees:  ‫’’اول اﻟﻴﻮم ﺣﻘﺎواﻟﺜﺎﱏ ﻣﻌﺮوف و اﻟﺜﺎﻟﺚ رﻳﺎ‬

‫ اﺑﻮداؤد‬،‫ دارﻗﻄﲎ‬،‫“ ﲰﻌ; ﺗﺮﻣﺬی‬Walima on first day is rightful, second day is

virtue and third day vanity and cheaper publicity”. In India and Pakistan we follow those Fatwas which were written many hundred


25 |

years ago when there was no system of Reception dinner or dowry and other rituals. These days people want to hold the Reception dinner and dowry like celebrities’ and Walima due to Sunnat. This is not fair with the poor and middle class as they constitute 90% of the community's population who cannot afford. The rich people leave no stone unturned in showing off their wealth. Since there is no concept of Walima in Hindu community, they fulfill all their desires on the first day itself. But the Muslims borrowed the day of Kanyadan’s celebrations from them and kept Walima’s system like Islamic tradition. Our elders never objected to it, instead they participated and encouraged it. This is the peak of hypocrisy. On one hand, they claim that it is not appropriate to hold the Walima before the meeting of the couple, but call it legitimate to take dowry & dinner from bride’s parents which is utterly illegitimate. The time is not fixed imperatively in any Hadees regarding Walima. The Prophet SAWS held all his Walimas on the next day, except one. Those who perform the wedding purely on the basis of Sunnat, they have a right to insist on holding the Walima next day. But all others, who have facilitated intrusion of non-Islmaic rituals in their marriage, have no right to make such insistence. It would be like offering a prayer seeking success in committing a theft or adultery. This leads to hypocrisy. People should save time and money. Instead of holding two separate ceremonies where same people gather again, we must minimize it to one day. If there is a desire to invite all the guests on the first day itself, the groom should host the Walima in advance. If our elders have any objection, they should decide first which evil is better – bigger evil or smaller evil? If holding the Walima in advance is a sin, this sin is lot smaller than burdening the bride’s side with debts, entrap them in a web of interest and make them spend their lifetime savings in the guise of a system which is


26 | not Islamic. The biggest indeliberate sin is that it compels others to follow the same system. Another noticeable hypocrisy is the insistence of people on holding Walima on the next day, as per the Sunnat. They never insist to adopt the principle of serving food like the Sunnat. By assembling hundreds of guests, they pronounce between the lines that the Prophet SAWS had less capacity to spend than us (Nauzu Billah). The women, in particular, are strongly against the Walima on the same day. They take it as a bad omen and behave as if the Nikahwill be nullified if another dinner is not served next day in the name of Walima. They fight for it as a Jihad. They get the support and even Fatwas from other relatives. We request such elders to maintain the same silence and ignorance on advance Walima as they do while witnessing lavish marriages. Instead of instilling doubts among people and triggering debate on the validity of such Walimas, they must remain neutral and quiet. By raisings suspicions among people, they will do more harm than good to the Shariya. If you cannot oppose the dowry and Reception dinners, please do not object to the idea of Walima in advance too. The Prophet SAWS has fixed not only the procedure of Nikah, but he has fixed the venue of Nikah too. He asked the Ummat  ‫ﺎح و‬q‫ﻠﻨﻮا ﻫﺬا اﻟﻨ‬.‫ ا‬

‫“ﺟﻌﻠﻮہ  ﰱ  اﳌﺴﺎﺟﺪ‬Announce

the Nikah and hold it in mosques”. Those

who play the trailer in the mosque for Nikah ritual with Qazi and then screen the complete film in the Reception dinner are cheating like the Jews who used to play trick when they were asked not to fish on Saturday. It is again a hypocrisy that people insist on Walima to be next day but do not insist on the wedding to be done only in the mosque. They seek ways to indulge in extravagant activities. Those who attend such ceremonies provide strength to a Bid’ah (innovation in Islam).


27 | Walima can be given anytime from Nikah to after departure of bride. If due to any reason the meeting between the couple could not take place, it does not affect the validity of the Walima at all as it is merely an announcement of Nikah between the man and woman. If someone wants to fulfill the argument, he can gather a few friends next day and complete the formality of Walima. For further details on this topic please read Fathul Bari, AllamaIbn Hajr, page 9, Chapter Walima, Hadees No. 5166’s explanation.

Is Ijtehad necessary on this topic? The dowry system and Reception dinners are the inventions of present age. They were not in existence at the time of those scholars whose Maslak we now follow. Therefore, not much literature is found on this topic in the previous books. If it is needed to open the doors of Ijtehad, we must do it. All the revered scholars of the past had kept it open as this is called “Tahqeeq-e-Munat”. It means “to review the current issues of the contemporary world from Islamic point of view”. Abu Ishaq Shatbi says; Tahqeeq Munat belongs to the category of Ijtehad which will remain open until Doom’s day. (As quoted by Maulana Khalid Saifullah Rahmani in Jadeed Fiqhi Masael, vol 1 index). Since the issues keep changing due to the circumstances, we must keep on reviewing the jurisdictions. It cannot remain stagnant. Take the example of Bank interest or Life Insurance. The jurisdiction of Jama Nizamia, Hyderabad, and of late Maulana Manazir Ahsan Geelani is the proof of Tahqeeq-e-Munat which said that the application of rules on the interest and Life Insurance differ from country to country. They cannot be the same in the Muslim-ruled countries like Saudi Arabia or Pakistan versus India, where the Muslims are in minority.


28 | Likewise, the recent scientific developments and technologies like DNA or telescopes have made it easier to take judgments on matters of Fiqh on complex issues like determining the gender and moon’s position on a certain day and date. Prior to the introduction of these technologies, huge volumes of Fatwas were written on such subjects still controversies used to go on. Therefore, we are bound to accept those changes. This is neither extremism nor mutiny, but an acceptance and realization of the truth. We have to give prominence to the facilities that can improve the morale of the community. The Prophet SAWS used to do the same as Hazrat Ayesha (RZ)

said, '^& =_ â€˜â€˜â€Ťďť´ďşŽŘą  اﺴﺎďł˜ďşŽ  ﺎďť&#x;    ﺎﲌﺎ‏Wâ€Ťâ€œ ]]Ůˆﺎ  ﺧﲑﺑﲔ  اﺎ  اﺧ‏Whenever the Prophet SAWS had to make a choice, he used to prefer the easier option if it does not involved any sinâ€?. The scholars too adopted the same procedure so as to save people from getting involved in

Haraam. As FatawaAlamgiri says  ‍ ﺣďťžŘŠâ€†ďł›ďş˜ďşŽŮ„â€†ďş‘ﺎ اďť&#x;ﺎďş&#x; ďť&#x;ﺨďş˜ďť ďşşâ€†ďş‘ﺎ  ﺣﺎام‏T’’

â€˜â€˜â€Ť  اﺣﺴâ€ŹÂ â€Ťâ€œاŮˆ  ďť&#x;|ďş˜ﺝďťž  ﺑﺎ  اďąƒ  اﳊل  ‏Those

solutions are better in which the

man can refrain from Haraam evils. Such solutions can be found in the Ijtehadi issues unless clearly prohibited in Quran. Although the issue of dowry and dinner is not new, it took a disastrous turn during the last two-three decades, especially after the US, Gulf and other countries opened doors of employment and trade for those living in India and Pakistan. The petro-dollars have helped in fast accumulation of wealth and people adored a new lifestyle under the impact of media and high-tech inventions. The grooms started carrying price-tags and their rates touched the sky. The cost of an ordinary marriage increased to an extent where it went out-of-reach for an ordinary person. This is the time when our scholars and intellectual need to sit together and find a solution. They must go back to the Shariya and find out exactly what is legitimate and give decisive one word answer, to the legitimacy of every ritual. It is true that the system of dowry and dinner has been in existence since decades, but it was


29 | limited to the affordability of bride's parents. However, with the changing times, it has been made compulsory. The "affordability factor" has been replaced with compulsion and demand; therefore, any ruling of the past cannot be valid today. Some people try to justify the practice by describing it “Urf” (prevailing). Contrary to this definition, this is not "Urf" but social blackmail. Even if it is accepted as "Urf", this is not the Urf of Muslim society. This Urf may belong to Hindu society which has penetrated into the Indian, Pakistani and Bangladeshi Muslims. So far, a lot has been written against the extravagance in marriages. But no serious efforts were made for a deeper look into all its aspect, especially in view of Shariya. The available literature condemns the dowry menace, but it hardly gives any practical method to eradicate the practice. Its consequences were not elaborated in-depth. Some Hadith were misinterpreted to name the dowry as “Gift”, and dinner as “hospitality”. This gross ignorance and negligence turned the dowry system into an epidemic. House-after-house and family-after-family, it took the entire community into its grip crushing the society morally and economically.It appears that such Ulema and people failed to understand the element of bribe and blackmail which remained hidden behind the dowry system. The non-affordability of parents to bear the cost of "Gifts" and "Hospitality" have ruined the lives of middle class as well as poor class.

Dowry and dinner by “Khusi Se” "Khusi Se" or "By Free Will" or "Consent" is the biggest excuse that the lovers of this extravagance give to advocate the continuance of evil practice of dowry and dinner. "What is wrong if someone wants to give dowry or host dinner willingly?" they ask. It is obvious that the guests would not enquire whether the dinner was organised by 'free will' or by compulsion. They confine their concerns to the quality of food and elegance with which it is served.


30 | Furthermore, neither groom’s nor bride’s side would ever admit that the cost of dinner has been imposed upon them. What would the guests do if they learn the bride's parents were compelled to give dinner due to social pressure or any other reason? Will they boycott that function? Everyone knows the answer, but only a few would dare to answer it. The advocates of "Khusi Se" are like the thieves who join the same mob which is chasing them. They join the chorus of those shouting "thief, thief" and escape from being caught. Similarly, the believers of "Khusi Se" remains on the forefront and try to convince others with their fake claims, "We did not ask for anything. But they (bride's parents) did everything out of willingness."Irrespective of whether the dinner on marriage day is hosted "by will" or "by force", is it legitimate to be a part of such functions? This is an undeniable fact that in at least 90 per cent of the cases, the ratio of "Khusi Se" (will) is very negligible against "majboori" (compulsion) or "zabardasti" (force) in giving dowry and dinner. Therefore, by attending those functions, some people give the proof that they are living with a dead conscience. If the excuse of “Khushi se” legitimizes the dowry and dinner, then why the bribe is declared Haraam as both, the giver and taker, indulge in it by "Khushi Se"? Similarly, a prostitute and the customer both make the deal with "Khushi Se". Likewise, in the usury, betting, horse race, lottery, auction lottery, radical feminism, liberty of women in the West etc., no one uses force. All parties make the deal with "Khushi Se". Then why these acts are regarded Haraam? Why does not the same logic apply to dowry and dinner? In the case of Misyar and Muta’a, Shia and Sunni sects both condemn each other on the practice of these acts while in both acts the man and woman make the deal with 100% "Khushi Se". If these acts are not legitimate, then how could the dowry and dinner become legal or permissible despite the absence of real "Khushi Se" factor.Should


31 | we pardon the killer, if his victim had given him permission to kill him “Khushi se”?

Is Khushi se factor allowed in Islam? Let's now talk about those who can afford to give dowry and dinner with real "Khusi Se". A small segment of our society can afford to spend money on their daughters without any force or coercion. However, those people need to introspect their actions as their affordability is driving thousands of others to financial slavery. Most of the parents of brides would prefer to send the marriage proposals to the people who can "afford" to pay dowry and dinner. As a result, the poor girls will either remain unmarried throughout their lives or will be compelled to go astray. In other cases, the parents will be forced to accept the proposals of men who do not match with their daughters in age, qualification, marital status, Kafa’at (equality) or culture. There are many Hadith of the Prophet SAWS in which he has permitted to spend on own children, but prohibited strictly if this spending effects the morality of other children. You have every right to spend within the four walls of your house but it should not create desires in the neighbours as, if they cannot afford, they may opt for wrong doings and immoral sources of income.

My Father and Grandfather too Had Taken The Dowry; The majority of the dowry-seekers is of those whose father and forefathers too had taken dowry in their marriages. Therefore, psychologically, they do not feel shy in taking the dowry and dinner. At the time of finalizing the marriage deal, the mothers and grandmothers display their negotiation skills in presenting their wish list. They in fact, take revenge for the agony that their parents have gone through in paying dowry at the time of their marriages. The fathers, uncles and grandfathers too participate in the bargain as brokers. What a pity that these men do remember the hardships they had to undergo at the time of paying their sisters’ or


32 | daughters’ dowry, and these old women too remember what difficulties their own parents had faced at the time of their weddings but still all these respected men and women become conscienceless and put the parents of would-be daughter-in-law in the same trouble. This is selfishness, inhuman, immoral and, biggest of all, proof of being a “Faasiq”. (A Faasiq is defined as the one who follow Shaitan and commits disobedience knowingly out of ego and desires).

Is it really the Sunnat of our Elders and Sages? Some people argue that the system of dowry and dinner is in existence since the times of their elders and sages. Those people, who call this evil a “Sunnat of their respected elders”, are completely wrong. This is uncultured and immoral and it cannot be called a Sunnat of elders. Maulana Aamir Osmani had given an accurate answer to this lame excuse. In his article published in “Tajalli, July 1957’’ he wrote," You call this horrible and mean act as our elder’s Sunnat? We don’t know who you are referring to as your elders? For a true Muslim, his real elders are Prophet Mohammed SAWS and his companions. None of them had even thought of such a heinous act and no husband was paid cash or dowry at the time of marriage. If you are referring to someone else as your elder other than the Prophet SAWS, then you are emulating the Kaafirs who used to give a similar reply to the Prophet SAWS’s call as "We are on our elder’s path, how can we follow you?”. Therefore, think twice before presenting the same excuse of disbelievers. The grooms, as well as their elders, who are trying to legitimise taking the dowry and dinner from the bride deserve not only condemnation but getting whipped according to the Islamic law (as they are spreading Fitna). I sincerely request the Ulema to endeavor to stop this mean system and save themselves from the accountability to Allah on the Day of


33 | Judgment. If you remain silent, then Allah will surely take account of this negligence and inertness”. "It is not easy to give up the path of our forefathers." All those who rejected the call of the Prophets gave the same contention that

‫’’واذا‬

‘ ‫ﻠﻴﻬﺎ آﺑﺎءﻧﺎواﻟﻠ; اﻣﺮﻧﺎ ﺑﻬﺎ‬. ‫“ﻓﻌﻠﻮا ﻓﺎﺣﺶة  ﻗﺎﻟﻮ وﺟﺪﻧﺎ‬Were our elders ignorant?”. The

Quran quotes their attitude in chapter Aeraf as, "And when they commit an immorality, they say, "We found our fathers doing it, and Allah has ordered us to do it." Say, "Indeed, Allah does not order immorality. Do you say about Allah that which you do not know?"

Is It Necessary to Gather Crowd (Baaratis) In The Ceremonies? Is it compulsory for a person to invite each and every relative and friend for the marriage? A majority of people say 'Yes'. They feel humiliated if they have to reduce the guests' lists or drop even adistant relative. If this was a virtuous act to gather the crowd, then Prophet SAWS would have definitely invited hundreds of people in his own weddings as well of his daughters’ and companions’ weddings. His famous companion Abdul Rahman Bin Awf’s has presented the best example of an Islamic wedding. He did not even invite the Prophet SAWS in the wedding although the Prophet SAWS lived in his vicinity. There is no evidence in the history that he invited the Prophet SAWS in Walima even. We must look into the real reasons behind assembling of huge crowd in today’s marriages. It is a lie that all guests feel hearty pleasure to see someone getting married. For the women, this is the biggest social get together and a show where they can exhibit the designs of their clothes, display the jewellery or share beauty-parlor tips with other women. The marriage hall is nothing short of a modeling ramp for a majority of women. Although the ceremony is organized in the name of “Sunnat-e-Nikah” but no one takes any impression of


34 | Sunnat. What they take from the event is the tips how to hold marriages with more pomp and vanity. For a majority of men, a wedding dinner is just the occasion to enjoy a free dinner full to stomach. Almost everyone among the guests has to host a dinner at least once in the life, therefore, in return, he awaits the invitations from others too. People don't really care to give a thought as to how the host would have had arranged money for the function. Since they were compelled to face problems, they don't mind pushing others into the same debt trap or financial burden. "Hum nahi kiyethay kya?" (Didn't we do it?) is the argument that they put forward.Thus, this vicious cycle continues with all of us forcing each other to beg, borrow or steal to host dinners. Some people are so shameless that they attend these dinners even without invitation. They forget the fact that the Prophet SAWS has strictly forbidden attending any party without being invited by the host himself. People must realize that the journey of whatever delicacies they eat is limited from the tongue to the throat. Once it goes down the throat, whether it was Biryani or Idly Dosa, it loses its nature and gets flushed out the next morning. Is it not idiotic to flush out huge amounts of money just for the sake of 10 minutes enjoyment of eating? On an average, one dinner costs Rs 3 lakh minimum. The average is more than Rs 10 lakh in rich Arab countries. If a minimum of 1,000 marriages take place in each city, we are flushing out Rs 30 Crore every month. This is the reason why an ordinary Muslim is always under debts and forced to seek loans or charity. This is primarily due to some people who treat food as their religion and, sometimes, they go to the extent of breaking the relations too if they were not invited. Only to please those stupid souls, others are forced to arrange as many dishes as possible as these people make jokes on the parties if there were less number of dishes compared to other parties. These slaves of taste-buds are responsible for the destruction of the society. This vicious system has led to the invention of newer


35 | ceremonies with invitations and return-invitations for Birthdays, Anniversaries, Circumcision, Bismillah, political and social Iftaar party etc., becoming common. Although the obvious reason of such parties is virtuous, but the actual reason is to fill the stomach and show off. The rich people can afford such extravagance but a poor or middle class man gets bankrupt when he returns such a party. If he Is not willing, his wife compels him to return the debt of the parties which they have attended. If you want to stop this vicious cycle, stop attending such parties which will burden you later. It is like a debt which you will have to return one day or the other and spoil your life thereafter. You have to ponder over the fact that in most of the invitations, your attendance is for nothing but to increase an additional “Baarati�. You must think that does your participation make any difference in your life or their lives? If not, then save your time and money. The time is more precious than money. The first question on the Doomsday before the question of Salat, Zakat, Umra or Haj, according to a Hadees, will be of how and where you spent your time for a useful purpose.

"Dowry In Net Cash - Mehr On Credit" Earlier, the Mehr used to be paid in net cash at the time of Nikah itself. There was no concept of Nikah without the prior payment of Mehr amount. To make the marriages affordable for all, our Prophet SAWS has further simplified the rules. Those too who could not afford to pay net Mehr could pay it by reciting a few lines of Holy Quran for the bride. Although Quran permits delayed payment of Mehr, but it is conditional to the acceptance of woman on terms of payment. But most of the verses of Quran insist that the Mehr is paid in net. If it is unaffordable, then the men were asked to wed a female slave. The Mehr was given high significance in Islam. But unfortunately, the entire system has now been reversed. According to rough estimates, more than 90 per cent of men are yet to pay the Mehr although they have taken dowry and dinners years


36 | ago. The amount of Mehr too is hardly 5-10% of what the men have already made the wife’s side spend on her marriage. Those who cannot afford to pay Mehr, they are allowed to become “adopted son-in-law” (GharDaamad). There are examples of the Prophets like Moosa and Yousuf, Peace be upon them, too who were not able to pay the Mehr, so they accepted to stay at Father-inlaw’s house and give free service for some years. This implies the importance of paying Mehr net. Are there grooms in the society, who, if cannot afford to pay Mehr, offer themselves for the service of in-laws' house? Instead, they mistreat the wife if they get the dowry less than their expectation. Another pitiful attitude is the bargaining of Mehr amount. People expect the dowry to be given without any bargain. But they bargain on the amount of Mehr just like the way they bargain for buying the animal of slaughter. They tend to fix the Mehr at the rate of their forefathers’ time but want to collect the dowry according to the market rate. There are a few gentlemen who do not bargain on the dowry but, however, take it however. With the changing times, the system too has changed. With the increasing demand of the grooms, the importance of Mehr has vanished and it has been replaced with dowry. If the old scholars of Fiqh like Imam Abu Hanifa or IbnTaymiya were alive today, people would have come and asked these questions: Why the Mehr is announced by the Qazi to the public but dowry is not mentioned? Is Nikah’s ceremony valid because “Aqd-e-Nikah” means the agreement between the two parties. Why one party’s terms are pronounced publicly while other’s not? If the amount of dowry is exceeding the amount of Mehr, is that Nikah valid? If the Mehr is kept pending without the prior approval of the woman, but the dowry had been collected in advance, is that Nikah valid?


37 | Since Quran defines the “man’’ as the one who spends from his side on her. But if the woman is forced or persuaded to spend on him in the form of dowry, is this Nikah valid according to Quran? The scholars of olden days used to keep a tab on the current issues of their time and used to pass the judgments upon their common sense. Unfortunately, we gave up this practice of using common sense and started adopting the judgments of old times and gave them the shape of final Islamic Shariya. No one wants to go to the true Ulema and ask about the contemporary issues.

Ceremonies Other Than Reception and Walima If the ceremonies like Haldi, Sanchak, Manja, etc., are held in the home itself and only those relatives or friends are invited who are really very close, there is nothing wrong in such small happy gatherings, provided, the number of guests do not overflow the capacity of the house. Inviting people more than the number that could be accommodated in a house would compel for hiring the marriage halls. This becomes an extravagance and therefore illegitimate. Since the big house owners gather hundreds of women on such occasions, therefore the women belonging to small houses too long for imitating rich women and over-burden their husbands, compel them to spend on show-off.

Funding Poor Girls’ Marriages; It never happened in the period of the Prophet SAWS that anyone raised funds for the marriage of the orphans of Badar’s or Uhad’s martyrs nor any organization was formed. Baitul Maal too was not established that time. This curse of forming organizations for the marriage of poor girls is the result of dowry system. A large number of people establish the organizations, make publicity through newspapers with a hidden agenda of acquiring leadership. Main donors in such acts are those whose source of income is not purely Halaal or they have committed the sin of spending lavishly on their wedding, now to remove the burden from the


38 | conscience, they make to barter deal with Allah to compensate thru such kind of charity. Very few organizations and the donors are those who work honestly purely for the sake of Allah’s pleasure. Collecting funds for the poor girls is same like collecting funds to save the life of an extremely poor drug or liquor addict who will die if he doesn't get his dose. Can we donate our Zakat or charity to such a person to save his life? Only Ulema can answer whether this is legitimate or not. But our common sense says that any cooperation in the sinful act is not right. Therefore, the dowry too comes under the same category as Quran orders the man to spend the money on woman. Instead, if he compels the woman to spend, he reverses the Quranic instruction. If the people are made to donate otherwise the man will not marry the girl, it is purely blackmail. Giving money for such cause strengthens a system which must be eradicated. Also, it will create more and more blackmailers in the society, we will have to fulfill their endless appetite for dowry. The recent announcement of Telangana State In India to help with Rs. 51,000 to every poor girl for marriage is a slap on the Muslim culture. It helps to strengthen the dowry system. This should be condemned. Instead of giving to girls, we must help the poor deserving youths who have a zeal to marry without dowry but cannot afford to pay Mehr. There are many incidents in the history of the Companions of the Prophet SAWS wherein men were helped to pay nett Mehr. But there is no single incident where girls were helped for dowry. All such organizations should work for making a man the “Real Mard” instead of making him a beggar or slave. He must be taught to live with dignity. Make him giver, not taker as the Prophet SAWS has said “Giver's hand is superior than the Taker's hand”.

Do We Need Ijtehaad? Often people scornfully ask, “Who are you to object?


39 | What authority do you possess to declare Haraam”? “How dare you call for the boycott while the Prophet SAWS has asked to accept the invitation?” If we present the proof from the Ulema’s books, they reply “This is the personal opinion of some Ulema, not the collective opinion of all Ulemas which is called IJMA.” So they try to escape. If the humanity is suffering financially as well as morally in the presence of Shariya, then surely this is the fault of interpretation and application of Shariya. It is inevitable now to apply the Shariya with the right formula so as to show to the world that Shariya has the ability to lead in every stage of day-to-day life. It is the best time to rewrite and set right the Islamic principles of the marriage system as whole world is facing moral crisis due to imbalance in the Men’s and Women’s Rights.

In Arabs, particularly in oil-rich Arab countries, bringing a bride is like buying a ship for a man who can hardly afford a small boat. The cost of wedding bankrupts him completely. In the West, people are compelled to have children without marriage as the laws of divorce are so devastating that no man agrees to marry any woman. As a result, the Feminism got prominence and spoiled the dignity of the woman. In-depth studies have revealed that the Feminism itself is the biggest violation of the Woman’s Rights. In Hindu community, just one wedding makes the girl's parents bankrupt. They too are looking for a reformer. Among Indian, Pakistani, and Bangladeshi Muslims, the weddings have turned into purchase and sale of boys. An ugly woman can get any smart and qualified husband if her father can afford to pay fortune in the dowry. Otherwise, even the beautiful and qualified girls are forced to wait all their lives for their match if their parents cannot afford to buy a suitable son-in-law and eventually they have to get married to un-matched men. We will have to apply the Fiqhi issues of the marriage, strictly according to the Sunnat. Instead of hollow and impractical advises of simplicity, we will have to consult the true Ulema and Mufties, narrate the real situation of dowry system to obtain Fatwas. Instead


40 | of giving exception to an individual, we will have to consider the collective benefit of the community and impose social embargo or sanctions on individuals. How a dowry-giver is damaging the society by creating greed, pomp and vanity must be realised. In such a situation, our strategy should be as the Prophet SAWS had said to Ma’az Bin Jabal (RZ), “If you do not find guidance from Quran or Sunnat, do Ijtehad”. There are numerous examples of the Ijtehad after the Prophet SAWS’s departure from this world. As soon as the first Caliph Hazrat Abu Bakr RZ took over, some Muslim tribes refused to pay Zakat. There was no punishment mentioned in the Quran or Sunnat for defaulters of Zakat, so Abu Bakr (RZ) did Ijtehad and asked to fight against those who refused to obey a Quranic order. Several examples of Ijtehad by Hazrat Omer (RZ) have been noted in the history like withholding the punishment of chopping off the hands of the thieves in the period of drought, making the Taraweeh regular, reduce the amount of Mehr (although not implemented), increasing the number of whips to those who consume liquor and those who pronounce three Talaq in one sitting, declaring Muta’a equal to zina etc., Similarly, Hazrat Osman (RZ) too did Ijtehad by the expansion of the Prophet SAWS’s mosque, started first Azaan of Friday prayer etc., Every Caliph used to have a Shoura (Advisory Council) of Ulema who used to take decisions on those issues which were not specifically found in Quran or Sunnat. The Shariya is not a stagnant set of rituals. It guides to apply the rules in newer situations with the change in circumstances as the application of the rules changes as soon as the circumstances change. Many a jurisdictions are found in the history which are different from the Prophet SAWS’s period but due to the demand of the new circumstances, the jurisdictions were changed. If the application of Fiqh is not competent with the changing circumstances, it becomes obsolete and the religion becomes like the confined religion of temples or churches where the religious rituals are continuing for centuries with no guidance to live in the contemporary world.


41 | Islamic Jurisprudents says that the issues are of two types. The first, which are clearly mentioned in the Quran or Sunnat. No changes can be made by any Ijtehad or IJMA in them. Second is the category of issues which are regarded as “AF’U” by the scholars. People legitimised the dowry and dinner by regarding them as Af’u. Dr. Hameedullah, the famous scholar, historian and Aalim of Jamia Nizamia who lived in France, dismisses this claim in his Khutbaat Bahawalpur’s first Chapter as “From research point of view, the Af’u can be categorized in five steps as follows: 1. Everything that is virtuous must be adopted. This is under “Maaroof”. 2. Everything that is evil must be avoided. This is called “Munkar”. 3. Anything in which there is an element of evil but the virtue is dominant, can be adopted. It is not Waajib. 4. Anything which contains virtue but evil is dominant must be avoided. It is Makrooh 5. Those things which are neither evil nor virtuous are regarded by us as Af’u. In the light of the above definitions, we can easily analyze the dowry and dinner systems. Of course, there are virtuous factors too involved in these acts as they contain the elements like“Gift” and “Hospitality”. But the evil is dominant as they give rise to bribe, begging, social blackmail and exploitation of women. Therefore, most of the Ulema regarded the dowry system as evil dominated virtue. If the Prophet SAWS has not prohibited something, is that legitimate?

Some people made the excuse that if the Prophet SAWS has not negated something specifically, it should be legitimate. Thus, they


42 |

legitimise the dowry and dinner. This argument is obsolete as there were many things which were not prevalent at that time. For instance, the train or air travel was not in existence at that time. So what stand should we take today on such travelling. Is it legitimate or illegitimate? But as far as marriages are concerned, they were of course in existence. Even Pagans, Jews and Christians used to wed according to a particular system. The Prophet SAWS did his weddings and his daughter’s as well as his companions’ and had set precedents with practical examples. He called such wedding as,"%+

-& % + ". /0‫ ل &*" ر‬3 * ‫ و‬% + " ‫ ح‬+$‫“ "ا‬The Nikah is

my way”. And also said, "Whoever doesn't follow my way, does not belong to me”. If someone wants today to include certain rituals from Hindus or Jews and finds the excuse by claiming that the Prophet SAWS has not prohibited these acts, then it is nothing but escapism from Sunnat. All those who issue Fatwas in favor of such acts will be accountable on the day of judgment. Dr. Hameedullah says “No prophet can change things descended from Allah. Similarly, no scholar or Mufti can change anything which is instructed by any Prophet. Only the last Prophet can change anything of his predecessors. If there is anything which was not revealed by Allah, and the Prophet SAWS decided to continue or did not show his reluctance to something which was in existence, then it becomes an eternal Sunnat. It will be obligatory to follow this until the Day of Judgment.” (Khutbat Bahawalpur, page 336). As far as the marriage system is concerned, it was an existing system which involved many odd rituals. The Prophet SAWS changed the system, abolished the walima of several days and limited it to one day. In the same way, woman was not allowed to decide on her own marriage or divorce. He (SAWS) gave the rights to her to choose the man and if he does not prove to be her ideal, divorce as freely as the man divorces the woman. So, those who claim the Prophet SAWS did not prohibit for certain things are indulging in falsehood. Except for the


43 | system established by Him (SAWS), everything that is added to it is an innovation and it is prohibited. Therefore, the dowry and dinner system is not at all an Af’u but it’s prohibition is proved from Quran and Sunnat. Although specific words were not used to prohibit those practices, but they are like the drugs, Hashish or Cocaine or cigarettes which are not mentioned by their specific names but are prohibited by the application rules of the Fiqh. To declare these things 'Haraam', there is no need to make any basic changes in the rules of Fiqh. Let's have a look at the methodology used for the application of rules by the famous scholars of Fiqh. There are the three rules to determine anything Halaal or Haraam in Fiqh. (JadeedFiqhiMasa’el by Maulana Khalid SaifullahRahmani, volume 1, Index) 1. Look in the Quran and Sunnat for the indication of certain acts. This stage is called “Takhreej-e-Manat” 2. Find the main cause out of many reasons which could determine the validity/invalidity of this act. This stage is called “Tanqeeh-e-Manat”. 3. Find the ultimate cause which applies on other things upon which similar application is enacted. This stage is called “Tahqeeq-e-Manat”. For example: Khumr, means grape wine, is declared Haraam in Quran. Let us see this in the three stages in the process of declaring it Haraam.

1. Look for the reasons: Is it Haraam because it is made of grapes? Or is it due to its liquid form? Or is it due its sweet taste? Or is it due to its intoxicant nature? Consideration of these factors is the stage of “Takhreej-e-manat.” 2. Find out the main reason: It cannot be Haraam just because of being liquid, grape or sweet. It is intoxicant that why it is Haraam. This stage of consideration is “Tanqeeh-e-Manat” 3. Application on other identical things: All of such products will be Haraam if they are intoxicant. It is not necessary that their names,


44 | shapes and forms are mentioned specifically in Quran or Sunnat. This stage is is“Tahqeeq-e-Manat�. Let us analyze the issue of Dowry and dinner. Please forget what was prevailing until a few decades ago. See what is going on now and judge whether it is Haraam or Halaal. Everyone knows what business is going on in the name of dowry now. 1. Is it Haraam because it is a gift? Hospitality?A desire or occasion of happiness? Or a bribe and extravagance without which no one can imagine marrying off his daughter? This stage of consideration is “Tanqeeh-e-Manat.� 2. Let us see the element that makes it Haraam. A gift, hospitality, desire or occasion of happiness cannot be the reason of it’s being Haraam. Therefore, it is certainly the extravagance and bribe, which are clearly mentioned as Haraam in Quran is the factor that determines the dowry as Haraam. This stage of consideration is “Tanqeeh-e-manat� 3. All other acts which are similar to this comprising the elements of bribe and extravagance are automatically Haraam. This stage is “Tahqeeq-e-Manat�. The Ijtehad which we are advocating is the above mentioned Ijtehad. This kind of Ijtehad is the need of the hour. No one can close it’s doors. It is inevitable as people are facing new issues every day due to the rapid developments in science, technology, economy, commerce, banking, arts, education and other sectors. Many issues need Tahqeeq-e-Manat to be answered. Another beauty of the Fiqh is that the same solution of Tahqeeq can be completely opposite if the circumstances change after a couple of years. We have to use the common sense to use Tahqeeq to face the challenges of fast changing developments. But, As Allama Iqbal laments

jk l m ? np o Uq r s

` ac bd e f M gh i


45 | "The profession of research has been emptied from courageous men, what remains are the slaves of Soofies and Mullas." To apply this Ijtehad, it is inevitable to expand the possibilities of Fiqh from one Maslak to another. We have to be open to accept other Maslak’sFiqh too if there is lacking of appropriate guidance on one issue. Almost all the scholars have permitted this. Famous scholar of HanafiFiqhaAllamaShami says: Many issues need new interpretation due to the changes in circumstances. If people continue to apply old solutions to the new issues, it would not only cause damages, but will also create moral degradation. This is against the ultimate purpose of Fiqh as the Fiqh has been designed only to remove the chaos and confusion. 0 [5 ‍)عﺳﺎﺋ اďť&#x;ďťŒďşŽďş‘ﺪ‏ The same things were stated by AllamaQirani of Maliki School of Thought that: All those issues which belong to the habits and Urf, may change with the change in habits and traditions. If no change is brought in them, it is not only against the Ijma but will amount to negligence in the religion. This is not the new rule being introduced. But this rule was already a result of Ijtehad of great men of

56 â€ŤŰ â€Ź7 8$‍ ا‏%& ‍ ه‏: ‍’’ ان‏ â€˜â€˜â€ŤŘŻŘŠâ€Ź#= *$‍ د ا‏7$‍ ' ? Ű Ř§â€Ź%$‍ د ا‏7$‍ @ ا‏#+. ‍ & Ű â€ŹA B$‍ @ ا‏#C‍ ا‏7$‍ا‏ knowledge. They all were united on this.

The Fiqh solutions of old age cannot remain valid for the new age. There was no system of IJMA in the period of the Prophet SAWS. This was developed in the later period. IJMA means the consensus of all contemporary scholars on a certain issue. When they do not find any answer in Quran, Hadees or old Fiqh, they deliberate collectively and take decision. This is called “Qayas�. The act of Qayas is called Ijtehad. But we have shunned the doors of Ijehad and put so many conditions for being a Mujtahid (one who does Ijtehad) that perhaps only an angel can fulfill these conditions. Whenever we tried to talk to some scholars, instead of pondering


46 | over the seriousness of the issue, they scolded us and said “So, you want to be called a Mujtahid?” Dr. Hameedullah says: IJMA is surely important but, at least in Hanafi faith, it is not a fixed or unchangeable act. A new IJMA can be replaced with an old IJMA. The new IJMA will be obligatory to everyone. Famous Hanafi sage Imam Abu Yusr Al Bazdoodi and Imam Fakhruddin Raazi asserted the same view. Since the IJMA is not a law given by the Prophet SAWS, but an opinion of some knowledgeable people of their time which can be replaced with the views of the contemporary Ulemas. We cannot be confined to the old IJMA of those days. The new IJMA will be prone to severe criticism. People will not easily accept it. But if we follow the Imam Al Bazdoodi’s opinion, the contemporary scholars will start following the new IJMA slowly but surely. Thus the old IJMA will automatically come to an end.” (Khutbaad Bahawalpur, page- 347)

Ijtehad In Hadees Hazrat Ali (RZ) says: ‫ﻰ ﻓﻤﺎ‬J‫’’ﻗﻠﺖ ﻳﺎ رﺳﻮل اﻟﻠ; ان ﻧﺰل ﺑﻨﺎ اﻣﺮ ﻟ|ﺲ ﻓﻴ; ﺑﻴﺎن اﻣﺮ وﻻ ﻧ‬

‘‘‫ﺎء اﻟﻌﺎﺑﺪﻳﻦ وﻻ ﲤﻀﻮا ﻓﻴ; رأی ﺧﺎصة‬J‫ ﻗﺎل ﺷﺎوروا ﻓﻴ; اﻟﻔﻘ‬،‫ﺗﺎﻣﺮﱏ‬

I asked the Prophet SAWS that what should we do if we do not find an answer to some issue in Quran and neither it is prohibited? The Prophet SAWS replied, “Ask thesincere Aabids (worshipper) who are Faqeeh”. (jurisprudents).” In those days Fuqha were regarded as those people who have authority on the wisdom of the verses of Quran. That time the Fiqh as a subject of today’s Madarsas had not come into existence. But today, the term Fuqha is attached to those people who carry a certificate from Madarsa. If we ask any dedicated worshipper Faqih who is alive, there can be no one who will be unaware of whatever is happening in the today's marriages. No such worshipper will ever permit participation in such parties and will never legitimize dowry or dinner. Some unprofessional scholars, who do not have a vision, attend such parties. Due to these people, whole lot of Ulema is defamed.


47 | Why not such people decide a simple equation that the Prophet SAWS has said, “Best is the Nikah which is cheapest in cost”. The opposite of this is, “Worst is that Nikah which is highest in cost”. Therefore, they must decide whether they should attend a worst Nikah? Will this be a best act or worst act if they attend? If they themselves attend such weddings, the common men will take a message that since the religious people are attending, it might be the best Nikah. Therefore, they themselves would not hesitate to attend it. Thus, the evil spreads faster through these religious people than by the vicious people.

The Solution? 1. The repentance is the best solution. No power can defeat you if you have true repentance at your heart. Just forget what you did in your marriage or how many dinners you have eaten. The moment you realise that it was all a sinful part of your life, repent immediately to Allah and Allah may forgive you. But some people do not want to see you repenting and correct your attitude. They want you to continue a sin if you have committed it once. But Allah wants not only to forgive you but wants to replace all of your sins to virtues. If you see the lives of the companions of the Prophet SAWS, there were men who had buried their daughters alive, there were addicts of wine, dance, waste of time and even thieves. Some of them had more than one woman in their custody without marriage too. But when these men did repentance, Allah not only pardoned them but gave them victories as well as dignity in the present world as well as in the world-after. Others became biggest supporters to these companions. No one reminded them nor scolded upon them about their past. If you start the boycott of the marriages, people will definite scold you in the beginning. But later, they themselves will realise the bitter reality. May Allah enable you to repent as soon as possible. There are six more steps to be done along with the repentance.


48 | 2. Do not attend any marriage party at all, neither Reception nor Walima, where there is dowry or dinner taken from the bride’s parents. 3. This boycott should not be a silent protest. You should be loud and clear. When you receive the invitation ask instantly if the dinner or dowry is taken or not. If the reply is in “yes”, fold back the invitation card and return it. This will spread the message like wildfire. Remember, no revolution ever came through majority. Only minority brings the revolution. You will be in the minority which is boycotting the marriages. 4. Convince the closed relatives and friends to stop two separate events of the same ceremony. The method has been presented in detail in the previous chapters. 5. If you have taken the dowry or dinner, please return the cost to her parents. According to Maulana Mujahidul Qasmi, if you had taken it unknowingly, it is Amanat. If knowingly It was bribe. In both the cases it is obligatory to return. 6. Whatever rituals or customs you want to celebrate on the occasion of any marriage, please ask true scholars if it is legitimate or not. 7. Support with your time, money and energies to those individuals or organizations who are endeavoring to eradicate the dowry system. AllamaIqbal says:

¥‫ ﻋﻴ ِﺪ آزادں ﺷﮑﻮہِ ﻣﻠﮏ و دﻳ‬¥|‫ﻋﻴ ِﺪ ﳏﮑﻮﻣﺎں  ﺠﻮ ِم ﻣﻮﻣﻨ‬ The celebration of slaves is in eating and gathering the crowds. The celebration of the free independent minds is in fighting for the supremacy of the nation and the religion. ****


A special request to the Admin. Committees of the mosques There must be, at least, one mosque in every locality where men and woman can gather to perform the ceremony of Nikah and depart the bride from there. This is to save people from extravagance. This will enable the people not only to improve their economy but also to act easily on the Hadees that: "Best Nikah is the one which is cheapest”. We request all the capable brothers who take pain to improve the morale of the community to donate for the expansion of the mosques as the Prophet SAWS has said “I guarantee a house in Jannat to those who build the mosques on the earth”.


Other publications of Socio-Reforms Society Mard bhi bikte hain …… Jahez ke liye (In Urdu, English, Telugu, Hindi and Bengali)

For Allah's Sake Don't Make Nafil Umra & Haj A Religious Picnic (In Urdu, English and Arabic)

Our Religious difference in the light of Khutba Hajjatul Wada (Urdu) Status Of Woman In Islam And Her Real Position in Muslim Society (Urdu)

Marital Problems And Its solution in Islamic Psychology (Urdu) Life insurance and Muslims (English) Write to obtain these books: Weekly “Gawah” Bachelor Quarters, M.J. Market, Hyderabad Tel: 0091 9395 381226, 0091 40 2474 1243 Or visit: www.socioreforms.com Facebook: Aleem Khan Falaki or Socio-Reforms Society Or write to : aleemfalki@yahoo.com Or call on : Tel: 00966 504 627 452, 0091 9642 571 721


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