Print Edition: May 9, 2019

GOP Legislators Ignore Milwaukee’s Lead Problem

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::NEWS&VIEWS FEATURES | POLLS | TAKING LIBERTIES | ISSUE OF THE WEEK

Wisconsin Republicans Are Deliberately Ignoring Milwaukee’s Lead Pipe Crisis ::BY DAN SHAFER

itting the city of Milwaukee against the state of Wisconsin is nothing new in Badger State politics. But that type of toxic rhetoric reached a new low this spring when Republican legislative leadership indicated they would not support a proposal from the new Democratic governor to replace lead pipes across the state because too much of the money would be going to Milwaukee. With these comments, this much has been made clear: Wisconsin Republicans are playing politics with something that quite literally is poisoning children in the state’s largest city.

The infrastructure bringing water into people’s homes is a public safety threat, one that puts children and pregnant mothers at particular risk. Gov. Tony Evers is proposing to add a $40 million budget item to begin the process of replacing the 200,000 lead lateral service lines in Wisconsin, 77,000 of which are in Milwaukee.

Rep. John Nygren (R-Marinette), a powerful member of the Legislature’s Joint Finance Committee, speaking alongside Assembly Speaker Robin Vos (R-Burlington), said on Wednesday, April 10, “My understanding is that the proposal, a vast majority of it, is going to Milwaukee. We had targeted our response to the lead issue as a local opportunity for communities to get involved and provide assistance at the local level, rather than people from Marinette funding lead replacements in Milwaukee. I’m not sure that that’s necessarily fair from a taxpayer standpoint.”

Data actually show the opposite. Milwaukee is subsidizing Marinette. Tax revenues coming from both the city and county of Milwaukee going to the state are greater than the amount of money coming back to Milwaukee from the state. The revenues coming from Milwaukee have increased in recent years, while the amount of state-shared revenue returning to Milwaukee has remained flat, and for the past several years, Milwaukee has been a net revenue producer for Wisconsin, with the city of Milwaukee essentially subsidizing the rest of the state.

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The GOP Has No Plan

Republican legislative leadership is also ignoring Milwaukee completely within the discussion it is having on water quality in Wisconsin. Vos recently convened the “Speaker’s Task Force on Water Quality,” which consists of 16 state legislators from both parties with not a single representative from Milwaukee.

The Task Force is holding informational hearings around the state—none of which have occurred or are planned in Milwaukee.

“Even though many of the individuals who sit on that committee may well want to do the right thing and believe they should be coming to Milwaukee, at the end of the day, we know Robin Vos is pulling the strings on this.

He has been pulling the strings on everything since he’s been Speaker,” said state Rep. David Crowley (D-Milwaukee).

Crowley chairs the Milwaukee Democratic Legislative Caucus, and the day following Nygren’s and Vos’ comments, that group of 15 members of the state Assembly and state Senate sent a letter to members of the Task Force calling the lack of Milwaukee representation and failure to show up here “completely unacceptable.” The letter points out that in 2016, 10.8% of Milwaukee children had elevated levels of lead in their blood; Flint, Michigan’s average is 4.9%. “Lead piping is one of the biggest contributors to elevated lead levels, and more than 70,000 homes, businesses and daycare centers get their water through lead piping in Wisconsin’s most populous city,” the letter continues. The problem “disproportionately affects low-income families and children of color, who are largely unable to move to a home with safe water on a whim. This is not the ‘Year of Clean Ground and Well Water.’

This is the Year of Clean Water. That means clean water for everyone in Wisconsin, regardless of how it’s delivered.”

Evers declared 2019 as the Year of Clean Drinking Water during his State of the State speech in January. The governor’s plans call for $83 million to address a host of water quality issues all over the state, $40 million of which goes toward bonding authority to pay for lead pipe replacement. The proposal could pay for up to 50% of the cost of replacing a lead pipe in Milwaukee.

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Preston Cole, current secretary of the Department of Natural Resources (DNR), is taking the issue seriously. “The sheer volume of lead laterals in Milwaukee makes it a crisis,” he says. “It may be overwhelming to some, but it’s too important not to begin. We have to start, and what the funding strategy does is a continuation of lead lateral replacement, and this governor is doubling down on drinking water, as you’ve seen.”

When you call something a crisis, you have to treat it as such. And this crisis goes beyond the $40 million proposed. “The price tag is spectacular,” says David Strifling, director of the Water Law and Policy Initiative at Marquette University Law School. “We’re looking at a problem that’s going to stretch out over decades, not years. Even if the governor’s plan—the money he’s allocated for in the budget—goes through, all of it, we’re still talking about something on the order of 9 or 10% of the problem.”

The estimate for the cost of replacing all lead pipes in Milwaukee is $750 million, and it’s not just Milwaukee that has these problems.

According to Cole, “130 cities, towns and villages have reported to the DNR they have some number of lead laterals.” “Any older community is going to have this issue,” says Strifling.

“Beloit, Waukesha, Racine, Green Bay. If you go outside the state, Chicago has a ton of them.

It’s not a Milwaukee problem. It’s an older city problem. It dates back to an era when lead was a preferred building material.”

Local municipalities do have a newer tool at their disposal to help fund the replacement of the lead pipe in the form of the Leading On Lead Act, passed by the Legislature and signed into law by Gov. Scott Walker in 2018. This changes state law so that water utilities can use ratepayer dollars to fund these types of replacements. It comes with several requirements and is somewhat limited in scope, says Strifling, but does provide a tool for municipalities to do something, albeit through raising rates and putting a greater burden on those with more limited means. “When you see some of the Republican legislators talk about, ‘Well, we want Marinette to pay for Marinette and Milwaukee to pay for Milwaukee,’ this is what they’re talking about,” says Strifling. That act, however, appears to be the end of what Republican legislators are willing to support to help children and families in Milwaukee from being poisoned by their drinking water.

Is Cruelty the Point?

Make no mistake, city government in Milwaukee has a role in this larger conversation, too, and there is an audit and an ongoing local and state criminal investigation into the City Health Department and its failings to address lead poisoning among Milwaukee children.

But that certainly doesn’t make the issue any

less urgent. It certainly doesn’t make the Republican legislative leadership’s action to drop the proposal from the state budget somehow more noble.

One of the most important pieces written during the Donald Trump era is “The Cruelty Is the Point,” by Adam Serwer in The Atlantic. The essay brilliantly details how the shared celebration of cruelty toward a variety of disadvantaged and maligned groups is a central element driving both the culture that swirls around Trumpism as well as his administration’s policies. With Trump as the standard-bearer for the GOP, is this not a state-level example of how “cruelty is the point?” How can you define

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ignoring poisoned children as anything other than being cruel? How are you supposed to feel as a family from Milwaukee reading these remarks from Nygren and Vos? “We [as legislators] have to push for and act on the values of the state as a whole, and to hear two of the biggest Republican leaders in the state Assembly say that this is going to send too much money to Milwaukee is a slap in the face,” says Crowley. “If we’re going to push this state forward, we need to do it as a whole and not just focus on particular districts.

We have to do everything we can to make sure we have healthy families and healthy children moving forward in this state.”

This is a big deal. Nygren and Vos should apologize for what they said and do so in Milwaukee during a public hearing with the Speaker’s Task Force. Following that, it would be best if they return to their posts and find a solution—one that doesn’t treat the citizens of the state’s largest city as a political football but addresses the crisis at hand with the seriousness it demands. Wisconsin can’t let Milwaukee become another Flint.

Vos, Nygren and ranking Joint Finance Committee member state Sen. Alberta Darling did not respond to questions for this article.

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NEWS&VIEWS::TAKINGLIBERTIES

The Good Old Days Before Charlottesville ::BY JOEL MCNALLY

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ostalgia for an idyllic past that never really existed has been a powerful force in American politics. Republicans have known this for a long time.

That’s why they keep promising to magically return to 1950s Beaver Cleaver America—a country where happy white families lived in houses behind white picket fences surrounded by people exactly like themselves without all different kinds of people changing everything all the time.

Suddenly, Democrats have discovered the political power of nostalgia as well, only theirs is a nostalgia for the America that really did exist until Donald Trump became president two-and-a-half years ago. It wasn’t perfect, but most Americans believed their country at least aspired to be not only a great country, but a decent one. It certainly didn’t openly encourage Klansmen and neo-Nazis to march in its streets with flaming torches chanting hateful slogans.

Two days of rioting in Charlottesville, Va., in

August 2017 by the largest gathering in modern history of armed, violent, rightwing, racist fringe groups ended with the killing of a young woman and scores of people with serious injuries. Powerful, frightening images of savage beatings in the streets with Nazi flagpoles were the centerpiece of former Vice President Joe Biden’s entry into the race for president.

Every Democratic candidate offers some variation of the same message about the absolute necessity of restoring human decency to the American presidency. Biden said when Trump claimed there were “some very fine people on both sides”—those spreading violent racial hatred and those protesting against it—“in that moment, I knew the threat to our nation was unlike any I had ever seen in my lifetime.”

‘Hail Trump!’ Trump’s Ugly Base

Trump’s response to Biden once again revealed his determination never to alienate the violent, un-American, white supremacists who have become an important part of his political base. In their terrifying night march onto the University of Virginia (UVA) campus carrying torches, they didn’t just chant “Jews will not replace us!” and “Into the ovens!” They also chanted: “Hail Trump!” Trump continues to mischaracterize those who descended upon Charlottesville.

In an interview on rightwing radio, he declared: “Many of those people were from the University of Virginia. They were from all

around the neighborhood and the area. . . There were a lot of good people in that group.” No, there weren’t. Local residents were overwhelmingly the victims of that violent invasion, including Heather Heyer who was killed, and 19 others who were seriously injured when James Fields Jr.—a self-proclaimed neo-Nazi from Ohio— drove his speeding car directly into a crowd.

Only two organizers connected to the two days of violence were known ever to have attended UVA. One was Richard Spencer, a neoNazi who organized a Washington, D.C., celebration weeks after Trump’s election featuring stiff-arm Nazi salutes and Spencer shouting “Let’s party like it’s 1933!” The other was Jason Kessler, the local permit holder for the “Unite the Right” rally. Kessler invited hate groups from around the country, including neo-Nazis and the Ku Klux Klan. UVA students protesting the march onto their campus were injured when the marchers began swinging fiery torches at them. Those arrested for violence came from as far away as California and Oregon.

Returning to the time before the nation’s president would publicly praise the “very fine people” participating in such violent, ugly events will be a powerful motivation for every decent American to vote in the 2020 presidential election, not just Democrats.

Most elected Republicans in the U.S. Senate and House are too cowardly to call out Trump’s intentional pandering to the most disgusting racist fringe groups. The party has depended on

racist votes to win elections ever since Richard Nixon’s Southern Strategy won over Southern white Democrats alienated by their former party’s support for civil rights. But many decent, well-educated Republican voters are still capable of shame.

Trump’s open appeals to racists are more publicly embarrassing than the subtle Republican code words of the past. Respectable Republicans today hate being associated with David Duke, the aging former Imperial Wizard of the KKK who was in Charlottesville praising Trump as the Klan’s president; or Arthur Jones—not the former Milwaukee police chief, but the former neo-Nazi candidate for Milwaukee mayor in the 1970s who resurfaced as the losing Republican nominee for Congress in a Southwest Chicago suburban district in the 2018 midterms.

The desire for a return to normalcy in America will be one of the most compelling issues in 2020 for all voters: Democrats, independents and decent Republicans. And I insist decent Republican voters still exist. Those who may have voted for an unfit candidate simply to shake up politics now see how dangerous it is to have an ignorant, unstable president intentionally fanning the flames of racial and religious hatred.

Heaven help us if they don’t.

Joe Biden is right to warn that eight years of Trump “will forever and fundamentally alter the character of this nation.”

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You Don’t Believe Trump Has a Right to Shield His Tax Returns Last week, we asked if you believe Donald Trump has a right to block Congress from getting his tax returns. You said: n Yes: 17% n No: 83%

What Do You Say? Is it absolutely essential that Robert Mueller testify before Congress? n Yes n No Vote online at shepherdexpress.com. We’ll publish the results of this poll in next week’s issue.

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NEWS&VIEWS::FEATURE

Redefining West Allis MILWAUKEE’S INDUSTRIAL SUBURB FINDS A FUTURE BEYOND FACTORIES ::BY CATHERINE JOZWIK Mayor Dan Devine at Ribbon Cutting for Wild Roots

West Allis Cheese & Sausage Shoppe

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or years, West Allis has been stereotyped as little more than a decaying manufacturing town with a bar on every corner and the site of the annual Wisconsin State Fair.

But city officials and business owners are working tirelessly to shed the negative image of Milwaukee’s largest suburb, which has a population of 60,000. Several years ago, West Allis hired marketing firm Savage Solutions to help give the city a facelift. The campaign, which has included print media, radio and web ads, was launched last fall.

“It’s really trying to focus on the transformation we are seeing,” says West Allis Mayor Dan Devine, who was elected in 2008.

The history of West Allis dates back to 1906, four years after major machine manufacturing plant AllisChalmers was built. By the mid-1980s, business at Allis-Chalmers was in steep decline. In 1985, three of the company’s product lines, including its joint venture in electrical controls with the Siemens company, were dissolved. In 1999, the company closed its Wisconsin offices.

The closure of West Allis’s largest employer was a big economic blow to the city. However, in the last decade, the number of locally-owned eateries in West Allis has grown dramatically. These establishments have not only provided jobs for residents but have also put the city on the map as a major destination for foodies in the Metro Milwaukee area.

Busy Food Scene West Allis Farmers’ Market

Westallion Brewery 8 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

“In the last few years, we are seeing an explosion of restaurants and coffee shops. Our food scene has been booming and we are really excited,” Devine said.

“When I first got elected in 2008, there were maybe two or three local restaurants. Now, there are 20 or 30.”

These establishments include coffee shop Urban Joe Café, Peruvian restaurant Chef Paz and the rustic Wild Roots, which features cuisine made with wild edibles like mushrooms. Chef Maritza Paz opened Chef Paz in 2012. The restaurant serves traditional Peruvian dishes, among them sautéed lomo steak and papa a la Huancaína (potatoes with cheese, yellow pepper and spices). Devine, she said, has been very supportive of local restaurant owners, which has helped build up the city’s reputation for great cuisine. “This is the dream of all of us who live in West Allis—to be considered the foodie paradise,” says Paz. Craft beer enthusiasts Kim and Erik Dorfner opened Westallion Brewery, West Allis’s first and only craft brewery, in April 2017. She said that, at first, people were skeptical about the success rate of a craft brewery in a city known for small corner bars

and drinking mass-produced beers like Miller High Life. But Devine, also a craft beer aficionado, was completely on board with the idea. “He laughed and said, ‘this is the phone call I’ve been waiting for seven years,” says Kim Dorfner.

Besides seasonal beers, like the brewery’s tremendously popular autumn candy corn beer (which caught the attention of CNN and talk show host Stephen Colbert), Westallion offers several that pay homage to famous West Allis residents. Lillehammer Gold, a pilsner beer, is a tribute to Olympic gold-medal speed skater Dan Jansen; Generale is a Scottish ale named after World War I General Billy Mitchell. “West Allis is rich in history, and a lot of people don’t know that.

There are so many cool historic people and events,” Kim Dorfner adds.

Events Year Round

Although the city is best known for the Wisconsin State Fair, West Allis hosts community activities year-round.

The city’s award-winning farmers market, held from May through November at 6501 W. National Ave., will celebrate its 100th anniversary this year. In addition to selling locally-grown produce, honey, meat and eggs, the farmers’ market holds a Christkindlmarket, Food Truck Fridays in the summer and a National Night Out. For the past two years, Mark Lutz, owner of the West Allis Cheese and Sausage Shoppe, 6832 W. Becher St., has held “Curds and Kegs,” an event which highlights Wisconsin cheesemakers, local craft brewers and distillers.

West Allis also has affordable housing. An average home often costs up to $30,000 less than a home in some Milwaukee neighborhoods. Devine says the city’s convenient location is steadily drawing new business owners and residents each year. “West Allis has every sense of a small-town feel, but we are next to a major metropolitan area. Every direction you go, there’s something to do,” the mayor notes.

West Allis second district alderperson, Eric Euteneier, elected in spring 2018, moved from Milwaukee’s East Side to the city about five years ago. “I could see it being an up-and-coming community with beautiful housing, low taxes and low rent,” he says. Euteneier adds that young professionals renovating homes are deciding to live in them rather than flip them. This, he believes, is a factor that helps West Allis maintains a strong sense of community. “Neighborhood associations are really growing. Everyone is walking the neighborhoods together, and everybody really looks out for each other,” he says.

According to Devine and Euteneier, several business and residential developments will be added to the city within the next few years. The Mandel Group real estate development company will open The West, a luxury apartment community (6620 W. National Ave.), this summer. Milwaukee company Cobalt Partners announced plans to build an $87 million site along the 70th Street corridor the project will consist of a hotel, retail and office space and educational facility.

West Allis also plans to open a dog park near Nathan Hale High School. So far, volunteers have raised about $30,000 to complete the project. “There is a lot on the horizon,” says Devine.

Euteneier expects to see lots of development in the city within the next five years. However, he stresses that city officials will strive to keep the history of West Allis alive. “We don’t want to get rid of the old image too much. Our past really built our future,” he says.

“West Allis will always remain West Allis.”

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NEWS&VIEWS::ISSUEOFTHEWEEK

Money for Nothing WHY ARE WE PAYING WE ENERGIES $430 MILLION IN PROFITS ON A COAL PLANT THAT SHUT DOWN LAST YEAR? ::BY THOMAS CONTENT

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as prices are up nearly three bucks a gallon, so maybe it’s time for a car that gets better mileage. You head to the dealership to trade in your car in your quest for better miles per gallon. But before you drive it away, you find out how much money you’ll get from trading in that old, less efficient car. You want to make sure you don’t get a bad deal.

For We Energies customers trying to cope with high electric rates, it’ll be a much different story if the utility gets its way. Customers of the monopoly utility will have to pay for the new car—plus keep making payments, with 10% interest, for the inefficient old car they’re “trading in.” Sound crazy? Let me explain: The Pleasant Prairie power plant was shut down last year. In Wisconsin, unlike other states, utilities don’t have to get state permission to shut plants down, even when there’s still a lot left to pay off on the equivalent of the car loan.

How big of a loan remains to be paid off? A whopping $645 million for Pleasant Prairie, including hundreds of millions spent in the last decade to keep the plant going. In its application to raise rates by 6% by 2021, the Milwaukee utility asks that its customers keep paying for that plant for 20 more years—that’s right, for a plant that it decided to shut down because it was no longer needed.

We don’t think it’s fair for customers already paying the seventh highest electric rates in the Midwest to fork over profit of more than 10% a year for a power plant that will

never be used again to keep the lights on or businesses humming. If you tally up just the profit We Energies projects it’ll make on that shuttered plant in the years ahead, it adds up to more than $430 million, much of it paid for by the homeowners, renters and businesses in Milwaukee and southeastern Wisconsin.

Of course, this isn’t the only issue that will be examined in the rate case, which would tack on another $80 a year to a typical household’s power bill if state regulators rubber-stamp the utility’s application. Some other issues in focus for us at the Citizens Utility Board: • We Energies earns the highest profit of all the utilities in the state and is among the top performing utilities on Wall Street; now it’s asking the Public Service Commission for an even higher profit rate in 2020 and 2021.

• The monopoly utility is also asking to bill Wisconsin customers for costs that should be the responsibility of Michiganders. When We Energies’ parent company bought another utility four years ago, Michigan’s governor, iron ore mines and other big energy customers protested at first but ultimately brokered a deal saddling We Energies customers in Wisconsin with extra costs. That’s not something customers here should have to pay.

But this coal plant issue is one to keep an eye on, because Wisconsin’s utilities, after investing heavily in fossil-fuel-based fleets, have now pledged to shutter more coal plants as they shift away from coal and toward trimming emissions linked to climate change.

Let’s not force customers to pay money for nothing and let the monopolies earn double-digit profit on all the investments they’re now second-guessing and shedding. If we don’t stand up and call for a better deal, it will be like our paying highinterest loans for the efficient car we want to drive and for the gas guzzler that’s been sent to the junk heap.

Thomas Content is Executive Director of the Citizens Utility Board of Wisconsin. CUB is a nonpartisan nonprofit organization that advocates for fair and affordable prices linked to safe and reliable utility services on behalf of residential and small business customers across the state.

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::OUTOFMYMIND

What a Face Can Tell Us ::BY PHILIP CHARD

H

uman faces are fascinating. Of equal interest is how we interpret them.

When with a person, new or known, one of the first things we do is size them up by observing the face. The eyes may be the windows to the soul, but the face as a whole is a window to the mind, to the person inside.

Some faces read like open books. Others are opaque and inscrutable.

Regardless of the degree of transparency, most of us (except perhaps those who just want to be left alone) do our best to read the unique hieroglyphics of the face. This involves how we interpret and respond to certain features and expressions. Do you feel differently toward a face that is symmetrical versus not? Are the eyes identical, or does each have its unique demeanor, almost like two separate persons? Does the mouth frown, smile or inhabit the neutral zone? Are the various features balanced or is it an amalgam of contrasts?

It also seems apparent that some of us are better at reading faces than others, and in certain situations, that can be a problem. One of the primary things we look for in studying another person’s face is her or his intentions. Do they mean good or ill? What do they want?

What is their emotional state? Can they be trusted?

Research shows we evaluate the trustworthiness of others based, in part, on the overall structure of the face, and we do so in less than one second. This predilection emerges in children as young as 3. In several studies, faces were most often deemed trustworthy when exhibiting a happy demeanor, even when not smiling, and frequently had more feminine features. Unless later contradicted by the individual’s behavior, these initial impressions showed surprising durability over time.

Now, some who intend harm can initially conceal their intentions by feigning sincerity and good will. These folks are who noted psychiatrist Karl Menninger referred to as “people of the lie.” Some are exceptionally competent in their dishonorable craft, so much so that even highly trained students of the human mind become hoodwinked.

On occasion, I’m among them.

I’ve known a few gifted empaths who could see through the wolf in sheep’s clothing thing. When asked how they accomplish this, most reported closely studying the person’s face while simultaneously “grokking” their emotional state. It’s a real ability and one that modern psychology and neuroscience have yet to fully explain.

A close friend, lord rest his soul, was one of these types. A number of times, he contradicted my initial take on another person and proved correct in doing so. In a couple of instances, his proclivity in this regard kept us out of harm’s way. One of those involved a man we’d recently met who asked a favor that involved some risk on our part. My inclination was to trust the guy and agree, but my friend quickly declined. Later, he told me he noticed that, while the other fellow smiled with his mouth, his eyes didn’t follow suit.

SOME FACES READ LIKE OPEN BOOKS. OTHERS ARE OPAQUE AND INSCRUTABLE. REGARDLESS OF THE DEGREE OF TRANSPARENCY, MOST OF US (EXCEPT PERHAPS THOSE WHO JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE) DO OUR BEST TO READ THE UNIQUE HIEROGLYPHICS OF THE FACE. Reading a psyche through the face requires a gestalt mindset, which means perceiving the whole that is more than the sum of its parts. We rely on this composite perception to achieve an overall impression of the person, particularly early in the interaction; her or his emotional state, demeanor, personality, intentions and, to some extent, intelligence. At the same time, we are experiencing an overall gut reaction along the lines of “I like you, I don’t or I’m not sure.”

Oscar Wilde said the face is a person’s “autobiography.” Before opening up her or his “book,” we first observe the face to determine if it looks like a good read.

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::CANNABISCONNECTION THE GO-TO SITE FOR EVERYTHING CANNABIS IN WISCONSIN

JESSICA KAMINSKI

We will keep you informed each week about the growing availability of legal cannabis products in Milwaukee and what’s happening at the state level with respect to Wisconsin’s movement towards legalization, what’s happening in other states and in the rest of the world.

Green Crown Extracts’ Wisconsin-Made Cannabidiol Tinctures ::BY SHEILA JULSON

W

hile working as an engineer in the cutting tool industry, Jason Kasinski became curious about wellness solutions other than Big Pharma to help people find relief from everyday aches and ailments. His colleague, Chance Fredrick, shared that same interest, so after Wisconsin’s hemp pilot program was created, they saw an opportunity to help people by converting hemp into cannabidiol (CBD). This past August, they launched Green Crown Extracts farm and extraction facility in Dousman, Wis. Kasinski and Fredrick studied CBD processing from experts in Colorado to learn how to make tinctures. Kasinski has an engineering degree from UW-Milwaukee, which he credits with helping him understand extraction equipment and the processes. They researched the market for the hemp flower, which Kasinski found includes everything from raw flower, pre-rolls, tinctures and edibles.

They use an organic hydrocarbon extraction method that utilizes butane as the solvent. “A lot of people say that’s a solvent-based extraction method, but so is CO2,” Kasinski explains. “The process we use also has a vacuum purge, so all of the solvent is out of the raw product base oil for tinctures.” Now that Wisconsin’s hemp industry has taken root, they primarily use biomass from Wisconsin, and some from Oregon.

Green Crown Extracts’ products are third-party-lab tested, in which a neutral laboratory tests cannabis products for purity and quality. The product line includes various strains of raw flower and tinctures in 500 or 1,000 milligrams, flavored in lemon or peppermint (blood orange is coming soon). Their tinctures are full spectrum, which contain CBD and other cannabinoids from the hemp plant.

For those who prefer edibles, Green Crown Extracts repackages Sweet Red Fish, a high-strength CBD isolate (pure CBD extract) that tastes similar to Swedish Fish.

Kasinski and Fredrick partnered with another CBD company to supply those so they would have an edible option.

Fredrick’s homestead has farmable land, which is where they will plant their first hemp crop for the upcoming summer. Their crop includes unique strains not commonly found in Wisconsin, such high-CBD strains Wife and Cherry Wine, as well as flavorful Chardonnay and Sweet Grass. Strains are often named after the flavor and aromatic attributes of the strain, as well as after people, places, animals or legendary folklore creatures.

They obtained their seeds from a breeder in Colorado. He observes that Colorado growers had a couple of years head start on breeding and provide seed, and now growers here can get strains that have already been approved in other states and have gone through the rigorous testing for tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) levels that fall below the 0.3% federal limit.

Kasinski is highly optimistic about hemp’s future in Wisconsin. “According to the number of hemp licenses issued, we’re on our way to becoming the top dog again in hemp production. Our seed provider in Oregon didn’t expect the demand out of Wisconsin, because now their seeds are unavailable. We have the fertile soil and farmers ready for a crop that will bring them profits again.”

Green Crown Extracts can be found at Hazy Dayz, Starbuds Medical, Bay View Clubhouse, Full Spectrum Healing, CBD Waukesha Wellness, Body Awareness Center, CBD Cellar and Naturally Inspired. They’re also at locations in Hartford, Baraboo, Madison and Deerfield, Wis. For more information, visit facebook.com/greencrownwisconsin.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n

12 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

Lawyers at Gimbel, Reilly, Guerin & Brown

The Uncertain Legality of Opening a CBD Business ::BY JEAN-GABRIEL FERNANDEZ

Y

ou may know that it is legal to grow, handle and sell cannabidiol (CBD) in Wisconsin, but the line of legality is blurrier than you might expect.

The cannabis plant is divided in two categories, indica and sativa; while both species contain CBD, only one strand of the sativa variety is what we call hemp. Hemp is legal in Wisconsin under a pilot program as long as it contains CBD with only tiny amounts of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the psychoactive component of cannabis. Therefore, all CBD derived from any cannabis plant other than certified hemp is illegal.

“Under the current law in Wisconsin, CBD itself is not legal as it falls under the definition of marijuana, [but] CBD can be legal under Federal and Wisconsin law when it is derived from certified industrial hemp,” explain the lawyers at Gimbel, Reilly, Guerin & Brown, a Milwaukee law firm that helps entrepreneurs launch CBD businesses. “Not all CBD is hemp CBD, and not all hemp-derived CBD is legal CBD.”

Confusing CBD Legislation

The law exists in such a gray area that Wisconsin government, itself, struggles to keep up.

Months after then-Gov. Scott Walker officially legalized hemp production and processing in Wisconsin, law enforcement agencies still didn’t know how to act towards CBD. Numerous Wisconsin businesses had already started investing in it when then-Attorney General Brad

Schimel released a note claiming that, “except under very limited circumstances [such as a doctor’s certification], the production of cannabidiol is illegal.” A few weeks later, the Wisconsin Department of Justice (DOJ) backtracked and announced that CBD produced and sold under the hemp pilot program was legal after all.

“These are new laws, and their applications are unclear and confusing. Thus, a person intending to engage in this business must tread very warily so as to comply with the law and to avoid criminal consequences,” lawyers Jason Luczak, Brianna Meyer and Raymond Dall’Osto say. They have their clients’ safety in mind, as it can be extremely risky not to follow the law to the letter when it comes to handling cannabis-related products.

Last year, a Milwaukee business owner was ordered to pay $4.5 million for selling synthetic cannabis products. The judgement had to be reached through a civil court as the formula of the products sold was not illegal; the DOJ pursued the business for breaching consumer protection laws instead.

Potentially, a CBD business owner could be fined, incarcerated and suffer “significant civil consequences” if they were to errantly approach the issue, Gimbel, Reilly, Guerin & Brown explain. Additionally, “there is no cookie-cutter outline” to open such a business, as the product can be legal or illegal depending on its type, origin and chemical components.

For that reason, it can be necessary to have an expert’s opinion before starting to grow or sell any CBD-containing products.

Once certain that a specific business model doesn’t carry any legal risk, Wisconsin law allows anyone to grow and sell hemp “to the greatest extent allowed under federal law,” so long as it follows the strict federal definition and contains less than 0.3% THC. For that, you need a lifetime license to grow or handle hemp, followed by annual registrations, which cost a few hundred dollars each.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::SAVINGOURDEMOCRACY ( MAY 9 - 15, 2019 ) The Shepherd Express serves as a clearinghouse for all activities in the greater Milwaukee area that peacefully push back against discriminatory, reactionary or authoritarian actions and policies of the Trump administration and other activities that seek to thwart social justice.

known for its trails and park spaces, the district was once a drain on the community and was known for abandoned buildings, contaminated land and a certain smell. Thanks to the many partners behind the scenes, this area transformed more than anyone expected. It is now home to the Menomonee Valley Industrial Center and Community Park, Three Bridges Park, the Hank Aaron State Trail and dozens of species of native plants and wildlife.

Saturday, May 11

Tuesday, May 14

Every Saturday from noon-1 p.m., concerned citizens join with Peace Action of Wisconsin to protest war and literally “Stand for Peace.” Signs will be provided for those who need them. Protesters are encouraged to stick around for conversation and coffee the protest.

Where people live influences their health. More and more health care organizations and others in Milwaukee are targeting efforts and resources toward improving access to affordable and safe housing. Panelists will talk about efforts to address lead in the city, improve access to affordable housing and what else is needed.

Peace Action of Wisconsin: Stand for Peace @ the corner of 27th St. and Layton Ave. and 43rd St., noon-1 p.m.

Panel Series: The Impact of Housing on Healthcare @ Wisconsin Club (900 W. Wisconsin Ave.) 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m.

Laughing Liberally Milwaukee @ ComedySportz (420 S. First St.) 8 p.m.

Wednesday, May 15

Monday, May 13

Join the Multicultural Engagement Series to Create a New Wisconsin History Museum.

The purpose of this event is to seek feedback from the Asian American community. The Wisconsin Historical Society values building relationships with multicultural communities in order to integrate authentic perspectives from diverse populations into the new museum. Share your thoughts and ideas.

With the Trump-GOP attacks on health care, immigrants, the environment and more, we need progressive laughs now more than ever. Laughing Liberally Milwaukee is hosted by comedian, cartoonist and progressive talk radio host Matthew Filipowicz. Comedians on the May 11 bill include Dina Nina Martinez, Shawn Vasquez, Cal Smith, Cynthia Marie, Carter Deems and sketch comedy group The Accountants of Homeland Security.

20 Years of Creative Transformation in the Menomonee River Valley @ Menomonee Valley Community Park (212 S. 36th St.) 5:15 p.m.-6:30 p.m.

This year marks 20 years since Menomonee Valley Partners was formed and celebrates 20 years of transformation in the Menomonee River Valley. While it’s becoming

Share Your Voice! Milwaukee Multicultural Session Hosted by Wisconsin Historical Society @ Islamic Resource Center (5235 S. 27th St.) 12:30 p.m.-2 p.m.

To submit to this column, please send a brief description of your action, including date and time, to savingourdemocracy@shepex.com. Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n

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::DININGOUT

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SHEPHERD STAFF

FEATURE | SHORT ORDER | EAT/DRINK

Fajitas from Buenavista

New Buenavista Location Expands Space and Menu

($9.25) are homemade. The sopes are smaller, with a thick lip for holding toppings on, while the huarache is large and meant to be eaten with a fork. Both are topped with a generous smear of refried beans, lettuce, tomato, onion, sour cream, cheese and your choice of meat.

Guacamole ($5) is one of only four appetizers and is fresh and chunky. An appetizer platter, botana Buenavista ($12.75), includes mini chimichangas, flautas and grilled shrimp. The house chips and salsa are good enough for me though, with a bowl of cooked tomato salsa studded with fresh tomatoes and onions for freshness, and the creamy green “grandma’s sauce” in one of the squeeze bottles that always packs a punch. Chips are merely a delivery vehicle ::BY LACEY MUSZYNSKI for bright green pools of the stuff.

The seafood section of the menu includes favorites from the Taqueria like cama’ve been going to Taqueria Buenavista in all of its iterations for rones al mojo de ajo ($12.75), or shrimp in a garlic and onion sauce, and camarones years. The original location, on 60th and Burnham, is a counter service a la Mexicana ($12.75) with tomatoes, jalapeno and onions. Camarones a la diabla spot that is tiny but pumps out great tacos, and they operate a few ($12.75) come with about a dozen plump shrimp in a deep red salsa with sliced food trucks as well. Recently, the owners closed a second Buenavista onions. It’s only mildly spicy. Tilapia ($12.50) in a number of preparations, coctel de on Forest Home in order to pay more attention to the new Buenavista camarones ($12.75) and ceviche ($10.50) are all new dishes.

Banquets & Restaurant. As the name implies, the new space is part banquet Meat lovers will enjoy the new parrillada which can be ordered for one person hall and part restaurant. The restaurant is open during regular business ($17.50) or two ($35). Thinly sliced beef short ribs, grilled chicken, steak and chorizo are delivered to the table on a sizzling, sterno-heated metal pan. The ground chohours, regardless of whether the banquet space is rented out or not. rizo at the bottom of the pan gets nice and caramelized, while the short ribs and The restaurant has its own dedicated entrance, though it’s also accessible from the banquet side. It felt a little like we were eating in a banquet hall too, other meats on top are well seasoned. Grilled onions, a banana pepper, cilantro and a quesadilla are garnishes, and they come with a healthy scoop of guacamole to with those dark veneer tables and padded chairs where the backrest leans brighten up all that meat. One person would be lucky to finish the steaming, singlejust a bit too far back. Besides a painted mural and a few TVs, it’s a bland and serve portion. sterile space, especially compared to the coziness of the Taqueria. Maybe it Also served sizzling are fajitas ($12.25-$13) in steak, shrimp, chicken and just needs more time to feel lived in. mixed varieties with bell peppers and onions. These fajitas come coated in a The food, on the other hand, is already up to its normal high stanbit of orange chili-flecked sauce and turn heads in the dining room as they’re dards. Everything from the Taqueria and trucks is here, just without a delivered on their ripping hot cast-iron skillet. picture board menu. A taco dinner ($9.25) is simple and so satisfying, A full bar is available with the typical margaritas, but I especially when you choose the tender lengua prefer ordering one of the many flavors of Jarritos sodas that’s lightly seared. Tacos come topped with Buenavista offered or a horchata ($1-$3), which is tinted with copilettuce, tomato, onion, sour cream and cilantro by default, ous amounts of cinnamon. Like everything here, it’s a so let them know if you’d prefer something else. The tamal Banquets & Restaurant good value. Couple that with an expanded menu and dinner ($9.25) is also a standard and includes three pork 7507 W. Oklahoma Ave. plenty of dining room space, and this Buenavista locatamales made by the owner’s mother at least once a week.

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DININGOUT::SHORTORDER

HMONG BUFFET at JACKIE’S CAFE ::BY JAMIE LEE RAKE

COURTESY OF JACKIE’S CAFE

Asian buffet restaurants bring to mind steaming trays of Chinese and East Indian food. But Milwaukee added Hmong cuisine to that array when Jackie’s Cafe (3906 N. 76th St.) opened about a year and a half ago.

Fans of Vietnamese and Thai food should find flavors to favor in this nofrills atmosphere. If the inclusion of a pho full of meat, greens and vermicelli pasta amidst its slightly sweet broth—as well as made-to-order long, sticky steamed buns chocked with vegetable filling included in the buffet’s price—doesn’t provide incentive to try Jackie’s, there’s plenty else to woo patrons unfamiliar with Hmong cuisine. Chicken and pork are given a gamut of preparations from hotly spicy to boiled with greens. And if you’ve ever wondered what fried rice unlike that at any Chinese takeout would taste like, wonder no more. At Jackie’s, it’s tasty in a way not far removed from a warm breakfast cereal.

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Bay View Area Bakery Continues Previous Owner’s Traditions ::BY SHEILA JULSON

“W

hen customers tell me they hadn’t noticed any changes, I take it as a compliment,” says Eric Krieg. With his wife, Karen, he purchased

Canfora Bakery (1100 E. Oklahoma Ave.) in August 2017 from Calogero and Rosalba Canfora, who retired that year. The Kriegs are carrying on their baking traditions with all the bread, rolls, cookies, doughnuts, cakes and deli offerings that made Canfora Bakery popular in the Bay View community.

The Kriegs operate the business as Krieg’s Lakeside Bakery dba Canfora. Lakeside is a nod to the bakery that occupied the space before the Canforas moved their bakery there in 1997. “They built a wonderful reputation, and I can’t compliment them enough. If you’ve got something that works, don’t change it,” Eric affirms. The Canforas allowed the Kriegs to use the Canfora name for five years while the Kriegs build their own reputation and phase in their name.

Neither Eric nor Karen have professional baking backgrounds, but Karen loves to bake, especially at Christmas. They both come from families that owned small businesses; Eric’s family had owned Krieg’s Bluemound Television, and Karen’s parents were motel owners.

“We wanted to make sure we had something to leave to our children,” says Karen. “We wanted to have a business where we could work with the kids and keep the family close.”

All five Krieg children are involved, handling management and supervisory duties, baking bread with the night crew, cake decorating and making boxes. Karen notes they wouldn’t have made it through the recent Easter holiday without their help. The baking staff from Canfora also stayed on.

Karen said one of the few new items they’ve added was Pfeffernüsse at Christmas, due to customer requests. They’ve added more wholesale customers, and they keep an eye on trends. They’ve added the popular “naked cakes,” which are layers of cake with fill-

ing, unfrosted and presented with clear cake collars around them.

The bakery offers custom order cakes for all occasions, as well as holiday and theme cakes in the store. There’s also a cooler with grab-and-go decorated cakes. Éclairs are one of their top selling items, Eric said, as are their classic frosted brownies. They continue to sell lots of doughnuts, which are a little larger than doughnuts at some other bakeries.

The generously sized Persian doughnuts have just the right amounts of cinnamon, frosting and peanuts. There are classic sugar cookies, or Italian cookies like tri-colored spumoni or tutu, a round, lightly glazed chocolate cookie with walnut chunks and chocolate chips.

Karen said they get many compliments on their made-to-order sandwiches, which are fairly inexpensive ($5.99 and $6.99) and piled with ingredients. They have meats like mortadella, an Italian luncheon meat made of finely ground, heat-cured pork. Saturday deli specials include homemade pizza squares, hot beef and gravy or Badger baked ham, which include six free rolls with a one-pound purchase. Popular deli salads, to Karen’s surprise, include octopus salad, which she says has a pickled fish flavor. There’s also potato and pasta salads, broccoli-cauliflower, coleslaw or olive salads.

Krieg’s Lakeside Bakery dba Canfora is small enough to accommodate custom and corporate orders, such as nearby Wrought Washer Manufacturing’s special washershaped cookie that they distribute at trade shows. Since entering the bakery business, the Kriegs say the experience has been phenomenal, and the Bay View neighborhood has been wonderful and supportive.

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::A&E

Brought to you by The Milwaukee Art Museum

FEATURE | FILM | THEATRE | ART | BOOKS | CLASSICAL MUSIC | DANCE

WES TANK

Before multi-ethnic became a tired buzzword, Present Music’s programming crossed national and cultural boundaries with imagination and respect. “We didn’t just find a living composer from, say, a Latin American country,” Stalheim explains. “We’d hook into the vernacular music of the country,” seeking local exponents of that musical culture to perform as part of the concert or—in that Present Music tradition—the post-concert party. In so doing, Present Music crisscrossed those old walls between high and low culture. “We wanted to bring those two audiences together,” Stalheim says.

They did it in ways that were more challenging than, for example, watching a symphony orchestra perform tepid arrangements of rock songs.

Stalheim describes “StalheimTime” as a “celebration of what Present Music made together so far. The program is all pieces we’ve done before, a contemplation of what we’ve created together.” By together, Stalheim doesn’t mean only the ensemble’s core members but the numerous collaborations between Present Music and the community. Stalheim was always eager to recruit local artists for joint ventures in sound and motion.

Central to “StalheimTime” is a performance of John Cage’s Apartment House 1776. “His idea was very expansive,” Stalheim says of the composer, who conceived the piece for the U.S. Bicentennial. “There are Native American ingredients—and hymns, folk tunes, African American influences, ‘Yankee Doodle.’ Cage was asking, ‘What is your idea of America?’” The diverse potential of 1776 lends itself to collaboration with a range of Milwaukee performers ( left to right ) David Bloom, Kevin Stalheim, Eric Segnitz from Bucks Native American Singing & Drumming Group and African American percussionist Jahmes Finlayson to Cantor Jerry Berkowitz from Anshe Poale Zedek Synagogue and the gospel voice of Laura Schneider.

“StalheimTime” will also feature contributions by Danceworks, Brooke Thiele, Quasimondo Physical Theatre and the Hearing Voices Ensemble in compositions

by John Adams, Elena Kats-Chernin, Donald Erb and Johann Strauss.

Incoming co-artistic director David Bloom was already aware of Present Music before he received a cold call ::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN in 2015 from Stalheim asking him to participate in an upcoming performance. “Kevin became a mentor to me for that concert,” Bloom recalls. “He said, ‘We want to do DON’T LIKE THAT WORD,” says Kevin Stalheim. He’s reacting to my suggessomething I wouldn’t think of!’ What we did was a wild tion that Present Music’s next concert, “StalheimTime Finale,” marks his retireprogram of renegade young composers.” ment from the ensemble he founded 37 years ago. And yet, whatever word is As for Stalheim’s future plans, he says: “I’m an explorused, “StalheimTime” marks an end and a beginning. It will be Stalheim’s final atory person, curious and bored easily. I was bored with concert as Present Music’s artistic director as he makes way for his replacements. playing trumpet, bored with grad school—Present Starting next season, the ensemble will be led by a pair of co-artistic Music was the exception because it was a directors: Longtime Present Music violinist Eric Segnitz will work constant series of different projects. Still, Present Music alongside David Bloom, a young New York conductor who passed 37 years is a long time. I’m excited to leave it behind for new things like canoe racing.

StalheimTime muster after participating in he group’s 2016 Turner Hall concert.

And it’s true: I want more time for family and Finale “He made an impression,” Stalheim says of Bloom’s conducting. friends. I wonder about composing. It would Pabst Theater “And he has genuine respect for our past.” probably take me two years to compose a Saturday, Present Music has gained a reputation internationally for com15-minute piece and then I’d force Present June 1, 7:30 p.m. missioning new work from contemporary composers and locally Music to perform it. But I don’t know if that for concerts that broke the barriers—many barriers. “I think we will happen!” were the pioneers, the igniters in Milwaukee,” Stalheim begins.

Present Music’s “StalheimTime Finale” begins at 7:30 p.m.

“Back in the day, simply doing work by living composers was a big deal here—especially showon Saturday, June 1, at the Pabst Theater, 144 E. Wells St. For ing that their music didn’t have to be boring, thorny and academic but could be entertaining and tickets and more information, visit presentmusic.org or call 414-271-0711. accessible to a lot of people.”

KEVIN STALHEIM

Says Farewell to Present Music in Season Finale

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::THISWEEKINMILWAUKEE THURSDAY, MAY 9 Express Yourself Milwaukee: Kintsugi @ Miller High Life Theatre, 6:30 p.m.

Express Yourself Milwaukee, a program for at-risk youth, presents this free, family friendly performance featuring artists ages 7-21. Themed around kintsugi, the Japanese art of golden mending, the program will span music, dance and visual art and will feature drumming and spoken word. The evening will begin with a pre-show reception at 5:30 p.m. that is open to the public.

Nils Lofgren PHOTO BY CARL SCHULTZ

SATURDAY, MAY 11

Nils Lofgren Band @ Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, 8 p.m.

Nils Lofgren is best known as a member of Bruce Springsteen’s E Street Band, which he’s performed with since 1984, but his long career has also seen him release more than two dozen solo albums and perform as a member of Crazy Horse, which he just rejoined last year. Lofgren’s latest solo album is especially personal: Blue With Lou contains six songs that Lofgren wrote with Lou Reed, including five that were never released. The two artists co-wrote together in the late ’70s, with many of their songs ending up on Reed’s 1979 album The Bells, including “City Lights,” which Lofgren reprised for Blue With Lou.

The 1975

FRIDAY, MAY 10 The 1975 w/ Pale Waves and No Rome @ Eagles Ballroom, 7 p.m.

Of all the bands to win over the easily charmed British music press this decade, few have proven to be as genuinely radical as The 1975, a group that’s changed the perception of what a rock band can be at this moment in time. The group first built a fanbase with a series of four EPs, one of which included the buzzy single “Sex,” a shimmery slab of British post-punk crossed with hints of Fall Out Boy’s high-drama emo, but on recent albums they’ve split the difference between direct guitar pop and synth-heavy dance songs. Largely written during front man Matt Healy’s stay in rehab, last year’s A Brief Inquiry into Online Relationships was the band’s biggest, most ambitious record yet. They plan to follow it up this summer with a new album, Notes on a Conditional Form.

Tacocat w/ Sammi Lanzetta and Heavy Looks @ Cactus Club, 9 p.m.

Few bands do more to dismiss the offensive stereotype of the “angry feminist” more than Seattle’s Tacocat. They’re proudly feminist, yes, but there’s nothing angry about them. Drawing from the chiming guitars of so many K Records releases and the peppy spirit of so many riot grrrl bands, they play songs about male gaze, gender inequality and their periods with peppy tempos and good humor. After three masterfully hooky albums, they signed to Sub Pop for their just-released latest record This Mess is a Place.

Fuzzysurf w/ Cashfire Sunset and Flat Teeth @ Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, 8 p.m.

On the Milwaukee guitar-pop group Fuzzysurf’s debut album Hometown Feeling, the band revisited the tunefully distorted alternative rock of front man Sean Lehner’s youth, looking to bands like Blue, The Posies and The Breeders. The group’s latest project, though, looks to a very different era. Colored with reverb-drenched guitars and surf licks, Fuzzy & The Surfs is a quick, 30-minute set that pays homage to the British Invasion and other ’60s rock styles. The group shares this LP release show with fellow Milwaukee acts Cashfire Sunset and Flat Teeth.

A Flock of Siegers @ Jazz Gallery Center for the Arts, 7 p.m.

For decades, one family has been creating some of Milwaukee’s most notable art and music.

“A Flock of Siegers” will spotlight the work of more than 20 members of the Sieger family, living and deceased. “The oldest thing in the show will be my great-grandpa’s sculpture that he made out of a hunk of marble and brass that he acquired at his job in the tombstone workshop,” writes Anja Notanja Sieger, the Milwaukee typewriter poet who co-curated the event with Linsey Sieger, owner of the Third Sector Creative. In addition to art and Anja’s shadow puppetry, the event will feature a performance from an all-Sieger band featuring members of Semi-Twang, Awkward Terrible, Contraptions, R&B Cadets and Scrimshaw.

SUNDAY, MAY 12 Cher @ Fiserv Forum, 8 p.m.

Few artists have been as consistently on the pulse of dance-music trends as Cher. Since she graduated from her folk duo Sonny and Cher—and their hit variety show—to embrace disco music, Cher has been a staple of the dance floor. She also notably helped popularize Auto-Tune with her 1998 single “Believe,” one of the biggest singles of all time. In 2013, Cher released her first album in 12 years, the dance-minded Closer To The Truth, which includes the Paul Oakenfold-produced single “Woman’s World.” She followed it up last year with Dancing Queen, an of ABBA covPHOTO BY BRENTON ersGIESEY released after Cher’s appearance in the ABBA-inspired musical Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again.

20 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

Read our daily events guide, Today in Milwaukee, on shepherdexpress.com

SUNDAY, MAY 12

Museum Mile Day @ multiple locations, 11 a.m.

Milwaukee’s shoreline doesn’t just boast some of the city’s best views; it’s also home to many of its most unique museums. Eight years ago, five museums, all within a mile of each other—Jewish Museum Milwaukee, Charles Allis Art Museum, Museum of Wisconsin Art at St. John’s On The Lake, Villa Terrace Decorative Arts Museum and North Point Lighthouse at Lake Park—teamed up to brand themselves the “Milwaukee Museum Mile.” This Sunday, they celebrate the anniversary of that partnership by offering free or reduced admission from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., as well as free docent-led tours and children’s activities. A free shuttle bus will make it extra easy for patrons to hop from one museum to the next.

TUESDAY, MAY 14

Johnny Marr @ The Pabst Theater, 8 p.m.

Johnny Marr

In an era when seemingly no band stays broken up forever, it’s remarkable that The Smiths have resisted the allure of a huge payday for reuniting. The group disbanded in 1987, and they seem content to stay that way. That’s left guitarist Johnny Marr plenty of time to enjoy other projects.

In the decades since The Smiths’ final album Strangeways, Here We Come, Marr has been a member of The The, Modest Mouse, The Cribs and The Pretenders (albeit very briefly) while recording as an in-demand session musician.

He’s also released several solo albums of solid guitar-pop, including his latest, 2018’s Call The Comet, an enjoyable throwback to the chiming college rock of the ’80s.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 15 Carrot Top @ Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, 8 p.m.

Carrot Top may be one of the most-hated comedians of his generation, but you’ve got to give him credit for this: He’s in on the joke. The red-headed prop comic’s shtick relies heavily on self-deprecating humor, and he hasn’t been shy about lampooning himself on TV (or taking other comedians’ insults with relative poise, as he’s done when he’s been eviscerated by his peers on Comedy Central’s celebrity roasts). At the heart of Carrot Top’s routine, though, is a suitcase full of crude, self-assembled props he uses to set himself up for one-line gags.

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Sleepersound, Nastos, Spirits Having Fun $8

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5/25 Lincoln Durham 5/26 Terry Reid 5/27 Nashville Pussy, Guitar Wolf, The Turbo AC’s 5/28 The 5.6.7.8’s 5/29 Nita Strauss 5/31 Joe Richter 6/1 Davina and the Vagabonds 6/2 Sarah MacDougall, Ben Kunder M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 21

::PERFORMINGARTSWEEK For More to Do, visit shepherdexpress.com

THEATRE

CLASSICALMUSIC

The Miracle Worker

Mendelssohn and Schoenberg

Six-year-old Helen Keller has been blind and deaf since infancy, trapping her in a silent world of darkness. Enter Anne Sullivan, the teacher who, through determination, grit and love, is able to overcome immeasurable odds and find the key to unlock Keller’s sensory-starved world. The Miracle Worker is a Tony Award-winning three-act play by William Gibson based on a true story that explores the essence of dignity, hope and how people can fulfill their true potential despite the most adverse of circumstances. Suggested for families and young people ages 12 and up, this First Stage production profers important life lessons for young and old alike. (John Jahn) May 10-19 at the Milwaukee Youth Arts Center, 325 W. Walnut St. For tickets, call 414-267-2961 or visit firststage.org.

9 to 5 The Musical

Fed up with having to work for a “sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot,” three female office workers—Violet (Kara Ernst-Schalk), Doralee (Kimberly Gibson) and Judy (Dana Roders)—bond over their shared disgust and concoct a plan for revenge. After they accidentally kidnap their boss, they decide to makeover their office into a place where all of their coworkers can thrive. This is a stage musical adaptation of the hit 1980 film 9 to 5 starring Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton. 9 to 5 The Musical features music and lyrics by Parton and book by Patricia Resnick, who co-wrote the original film. (John Jahn) May 10-26 at the Racine Theatre Guild, 2519 Northwestern Ave. For tickets, call 262-633-4218, visit racinetheatre.org, or visit the box office 90 minutes prior to each performance.

Frankly Music wraps up its season with two chamber music powerhouses and, in so doing, welcomes several guest artists from the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra as well as renowned cellist Lynn Harrell. The two works on the program are the Octet in E-flat Major, Op. 20, by Felix Mendelssohn (1809-’47) and Verklärte Nacht (Transfigured Night), Op. 4,

by Arnold Schoenberg (1874-1951).

The Octet, Op. 20, was composed in 1825 as a birthday gift for Mendelssohn’s friend and violin teacher, Eduard Ritz.

Completed in a mere three weeks, it is considered his earliest important work. Schoenberg’s Op. 4 was inspired by Richard Dehmel’s poem of the same name and the composer’s strong feelings for Mathilde von Zemlinsky, whom he would later marry. (John Jahn) Sunday, May 13, in Schwan Concert Hall, Wisconsin Lutheran College, 8815 W. Wisconsin Ave. For tickets, call 414-443-8802 or visit franklymusic.org.

Cocktail Trail CRAFT COCKTAIL COUPON BOOK

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Featuring discounts at more than 20 Milwaukee bars and restaurants, Cocktail Trail offers coupons for free or buy-one-get-one drinks at participating establishments until May 2020.

Cocktail Trail booklets are available for purchase for $25 online at shepstore.com and at MKE Home, Sparrow Collective, and Beard MKE.

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A NIGHT AT THE OPERA MAY 17 & MAY 19 UIHLEIN HALL MARCUS CENTER

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milwaukeeballet.org | 414.902.2103 Tickets also available through the Marcus Performing Arts Center box office or ticketmaster.com.

Our 2018–19 season is presented by Donna & Donald Baumgartner.

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: Annia Hidalgo and Randy Crespo. Photos: Tom Davenport.

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A&E::INREVIEW

‘Spike Heels’ Offers More Questions Than Answers ::BY BLAINE SCHULTZ

D

Raunchy Fun and a Demonic Puppet in ‘Hand to God’

COURTESY OF MILWAUKEE ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

Voices Found Repertory’s ‘Hand to God’

irected by JJ Gatesman, Milwaukee Entertainment Group’s production of Theresa Rebeck’s Spike Heels will likely catch you off guard. Georgie is a sexy, neurotic wreck who wears high heels because they make her legs look good. Her boss, Edward, is a lawyer who might have threatened to rape her. She is in love with his best friend, Andrew, who thinks he can change her into a sophisticated woman (at one point exclaiming à la Pygmalion, “I made you better than this!”). Lydia once dated Edward but is now engaged to Andrew with whom she had an affair while she was still dating Edward. Hardly a tangled web, the character’s flaws are on parade.

Their choices are their own, and they seem to have accepted who they are and what they do.

Becky Cofta’s Georgie has both men wrapped around her little finger, whether she knows or really cares, yet they view her as a pawn to their particular whims, driven by ego and testosterone. Georgie’s ambition to move beyond her working-class roots may be the reason she deals with the sexual harassment but is infuriated when she finds that Andrew “gave” her to Edward. Cory Jefferson Hagen’s Edward is genuinely unlikeable—traits he is more than happy to arrogantly expound upon. Yet, when Georgie’s rage causes her to lose her vision, he demonstrates compassion. Josh Perkins’ bookish Andrew comes off as well meaning. Yet, trying to explain the psycho-sociological cycle of why Georgie keeps falling for guys who are cruel to her all but predicts she will be attracted to Edward. By the time Brittany Curran’s Lydia makes her appearance, she is merely chum in the water, thanks to the others’ actions.

The production offers a realistic take on ego, infidelity and the roles of sex and power in and out of the workplace. It is complicated, and it gets intense. Perhaps the tables get turned; perhaps not. Perhaps there is a happy ending; perhaps not. One thing is certain: The basement stage of the Brumder Mansion serves as a great setting for slamming doors, throwing glasses of scotch and stomping upstairs.

Through May 18 at the Brumder Mansion, 3046 W. Wisconsin Ave. For tickets, visit milwaukeeentertainmentgroup.com.

::BY JEAN-GABRIEL FERNANDEZ

I

dle hands are the devil’s workshop; literally, in the case of Hand to God. One of the craziest puppets in theater history takes over the stage at The Underground Collaborative to wreak havoc in a local church in a show about family, morals, faith and, of course, demonic possession.

Voices Found Repertory and director Jessica Trznadel present the story of Jason, a quiet, isolated kid who lacks confidence. Even his mother, Margery, who is his only real support system, is faltering since the recent death of his father. One thing is left: his church’s puppetry club, run by his mother, and which he attends with a bad boy, Timothy, and Jessica, the girl next door. The thin veneer of civility is shattered when Jason’s puppet, Tyrone, appears to be possessed by the devil himself. Margery is sexually harassed by both her student and her pastor, the church gets trashed, and there isn’t even a young priest and an old priest to practice an exorcism.

Let’s be clear: In spite of a wholesome-looking opening, this is not a play for kids. There is a surprising amount of blood, violence, swearwords and sex; and you simply cannot unsee raunchy puppet sex! The whole show is irreverent and salacious, yet it’s also hilarious and meaningful. It takes a long, hard look at human nature, then it hits you in the guts with an unexpected joke or a situation so absurd it leaves you bent in half in laughter.

The play relies entirely on the exceptional acting skills of A.J. Magoon, who offers a schizophrenic performance as both the unassuming Jason and the devilish Tyrone, which is permanently attached to Jason’s arm. He is often the only actor on stage, carrying a conversation alone by playing both parties and successfully showing a wide range of emotions— from the depths of Jason’s depression to the heights of the puppet’s anger. The transition is so seamless that Tyrone seems to be his own character entirely separate from Jason.

Jason’s on-stage mother, played by Ramsey Schlissel, offers much to the show as well. She is confused, lonely and grieving, and Schlissel depicts her inner turmoil as efficiently as she makes the audience laugh during the more lighthearted scenes. Emily Elliott, Jake Konrath and Thomas Sebald round out the cast as Jessica, pastor Greg and Timothy, respectively.

Through May 12 at The Underground Collaborative, 161 W. Wisconsin Ave. Milwaukee Entertainment Group’s ‘Spike Heels’ 24 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

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A&E::VISUALART

SPONSORED BY

OPENINGS: “On the Wing”

May 10-June 8 Portrait Society Gallery 207 E. Buffalo St., Suite 526 Portrait Society Gallery presents an exhibition of more than 150 sketchbooks created by participants of “On the Wing”—its non-profit organization dedicated to giving voice and visibility to adult populations who may not otherwise have access to art resources. Damon White, an On the Wing participant, describing the impact of the class, says “happiness is the state of my mind when I come to art class. I’m in total bliss; problems are pushed to the side. Art is what pushes the boulder out of my way, so I can seek growth and humility through my drawings.”

The works on display were created over a two-year period during sketchbook drawing sessions at the House of Peace—the Capuchin hub of community services in Milwaukee. When participants finished their sketchbooks, the gallery purchased it and now shares the fruits of these labors at this exhibition and celebratory fundraising event. For more information, call 414-870-9930 or visit portraitsocietygallery.com.

‘Street Scene’ Maps Our Brave New World at Sharon Lynne Wilson Center ::BY SHANE MCADAMS

A

ges ago, when I was in art school in the heyday of site-specific installation art, we discussed notions of site and place exhaustively.

A “place” we always concluded was simply coordinates on a map; a “site” was a place with cultural significance conferred by meaningful human activity. It seemed a bulletproof definition at the time.

Then came social media, Google Earth and virtual reality.

Suddenly it seemed possible that these emergent forces had the potential to map an alternative set of mental coordinates onto a seemingly immutable physical map. Jon Horvath and Hans Gindlesberger’s exhibition, “Street Scene,” in the Sharon Lynne Wilson Center’s Ploch Gallery through June 8, explores the onset of this non-Newtonian, spatio-mental geography, visually remapping it for our brave new world.

The collection of digital collages builds from a well-chosen and diverse series of cultural sites—from the street in Paris where Yves Klein’s took his famous “Leap into the Void” to a now-defunct Greyhound bus station in central Chicago. Horvath and Gindlesberger layer glitchy impressionistic mixes on top of each site’s physical location—provided by the precise X and Y coordinates—incorporating movie stills, street-view imagery, text from blogs, user forums, historic images, public records, song lyrics and other supplemental data.

Each work is an archeological dig site, yielding artifacts layer by layer. One of the most intriguing (though there are many) is of a spot in Hernandez, N.M., where Ansel Adams snapped a famous shot of the moon over the Chama Valley. The image overlays Adam’s photo with one of it now and offers a firsthand and very detailed textual account of the artist’s attempt to 26 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

capture that very precise moment on film. Adams’ own urgent words ground a work that might seem eternal and beyond context in an immediate and personal narrative.

The artists complicate things further by selecting subjects that come to us pre-layered in meta. One composite work builds from a scene taken from the movie Memento in which Guy Pierce is seen photographing a hotel sign with a Polaroid camera that he uses in the movie as a proxy for his own non-existent memory. The movie famously moves backwards, with the opening scene being the latest chronologically. Letters below the image in the work label the non-linear sequence, described as “devilish” by a film critic named Andy Klein. Another work builds from a real Tokyo street where Bill Murray’s and Scarlett Johansson’s characters part ways in the film Lost in Translation. Underneath the composite image of the street are a series of random guesses pulled from a fan forum about what Murray actually spoke in her ear in the final scene. Information lost and replaced; hope regained; reality about a fictional relationship set in a real place, rewritten. All lost in translation.

There are also moments of powerful social commentary, such as a sad street-view image of a derelict house in Love Canal, N.Y., long since abandoned after being declared unlivable because of chemical pollution. The digital photo is accompanied by an image of the letter written by Jimmy Carter declaring the community condemned in 1978. In another work, we see a hotel in Waco, Texas, where it turns out an illegitimate murder confession by Calvin Washington took place. Supplemental information reveals his later exoneration by the Innocence Project. Many of these works crack open yet another dimension by sending one immediately (as it did me) to a search engine for further investigation.

Horvath and Gindlesberger also give us Henri Cartier Bresson’s most decisive place: Wim Wenders’ Berlin and Spike Lee’s Bed Stuy. They aren’t simply collages about places, they’re investigations into the nature of consciousness and awareness in a digital age; into a more mature and far more complex discussion about place and site.

“Street Scene” explodes objective coordinates into messy composites for the viewer to finally reorganize into their own contingent realities. The works might also suggest the presence of a glitchy new horizon, one just as terrifying and limitless as those that were once navigated toward by starlight alone.

Jon Horvath and Hans Gindlesberger, (left) A Hard Day’s Night (51°31’15.6”N 0°08’11.6”W) ; (right) Lost in Translation (+35°41’21.69”N +139°41’49.55”W) (detail)

“World Bonsai Day”

May 11-18 Lynden Sculpture Garden 2145 W. Brown Deer Road Bonsai is a living art that is appreciated by people in every culture. World Bonsai Day is for sharing this peaceful art and advancing international friendship and goodwill.

In honor of this special day and the re-opening of the Bonsai Pavilion, Lynden hosts a special temporary exhibit of bonsai created from material collected from nature. The exhibit opens at 1 p.m. Saturday with a demonstration by bonsai collection curator Jack Douthitt. This temporary exhibit will remain on view daily (except Thursday) through May 18, 2019. Thereafter the pavilion—which houses the collection of the Milwaukee Bonsai Society— will be open to the public Wednesdays, Saturdays, Sundays and by appointment May-October. Admission is free to members or with admission to the sculpture garden.

For more information, call 414-446-8794 or visit lyndensculpturegarden.org.

“Milwaukee Museum Mile Day” Sunday, May 12 various locations

The Eighth Annual Milwaukee Museum Mile Day celebration will once again take place on Mother’s Day from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. It’s a great way to spend Mother’s Day: exploring five unique museums on Milwaukee’s historic East Side. All five “MMM” museums-galleries will offer free or reduced admission and light refreshments, including champagne and lemonade at some locations. Other event offerings during the day include activities for children, prize drawings and free docent-led or self-guided tours at the museums. All participating museums are within walking distance of each other, and a free shuttle bus will run continuously every half hour between them as well. Milwaukee Museum Mile locations are the Charles Allis Art Museum, Jewish Museum Milwaukee, MOWA at St. John’s On The Lake, Villa Terrace Decorative Arts Museum and the North Point Lighthouse. For more information, visit milwaukeemuseummile.org.

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A&E::FILM

[ FILM CLIPS ] The Hustle PG-13 In The Hustle, a pair of scam artists team up to take down the men who wronged them.

Glamorous, calculating Josephine (Anne Hathaway) is a seductive Brit. Free-form Penny (Rebel Wilson) is a fun-loving Aussie finding most of her marks in bars. The pair run afoul of one another in the south of France, where they discover they are competing to swindle a naïve tech billionaire (Alex Sharp). Although the women have wildly different styles, they decide to pool their talents and run a coordinated con. This remake of 1988’s Dirty Rotten Scoundrels—itself, in fact, a remake of 1964’s Bedtime Story—switches the gender of the male con artists to female.

This turnabout required a fresh perspective, meaning that both the jokes and cons got rewrites.

(Lisa Miller)

The Intruder PG-13

‘The White Crow’

Rudolf Nureyev Dances to Triumph in ‘The White Crow’

W

Pokémon Detective Pikachu PG After nearly two dozen cartoon movies, the Pokémon franchise delivers its first live-action film fleshed out with CGI characters. Voicing Pikachu, Ryan Reynolds brings sardonic wit, the extra joke being that a seemingly harmless, rosy-cheeked character is sarcastic and caffeine addicted. Having lost his memory and his human private detective partner Harry, Pikachu investigates Harry’s disappearance with the latter’s teen son, Tim Goodman (Justice Smith). Humans and Pokémon co-exist in the experimental city of Ryme, but it’s unusual that Tim understands Pikachu’s speech, since Pokémon-speak is normally unintelligible to humans. While fans should appreciate the live-action leap, much of the special effects lack polish. (L.M.)

::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN

hen Rudolf Nureyev ar- Grigoriyev), Nureyev is shown gazing at every rived in Paris in 1966, far horizon, inspired by the escape suggested the press came with their by passing trains as well as the opera house in flashbulb cameras and the his dilapidated provincial Russian town. Forculture ministry brought tunately, Ufa was a place that benefitted from greetings and flowers. However, they weren’t the presence of performing artists exiled from there for Nureyev. The occasion was the Kirov Moscow and Leningrad by Soviet cultural auBallet’s first trip to the West since World War II thorities. Nureyev is also entranced by paintand Nureyev was just one member of the com- ings. While attending dance academy in Lenpany whose talent was unknown outside the So- ingrad, he haunts the Hermitage and when in viet Union. Within weeks, he would be famous Paris, he makes for the Louvre. throughout the world as a dancer, but even more Fiennes costars as Alexander Pushkin, the one so, for humiliating the oppressive Soviet regime. instructor at the academy with whom Nureyev, He defected to France in the Paris airport before already wild and uncompromising at age 17, returning home, his KGB handlers held at bay by was able to work. Patient and reserved, PushFrench police. Nureyev had no ideology. He was kin became the benign father figure the young just tired of being told what to do during every dancer needed. His enduring advice to Nureyev minute of his life. concerned technique as the means, not the end.

Directed by Ralph Fiennes, The White Crow He asked Nureyev to reflect on the meaning of dramatizes Nureyev’s life from dance: It takes the audience elsebirth through his triumph in his where through stories that dispense Paris on stage and at the airport. with words in favor of motion.

The White The film jumps confidently and The White Crow’s title alludes Crow without confusion between deto Nureyev’s inescapable identity cades and places, crisscrossing as a rare bird. As a child, he held Oleg Ivenko the many threads of his life until back from the snowball fights Ralph Fiennes a tapestry is sewn. Based on Juthat amused his classmates. He Directed by lie Kavanagh’s biography on the socialized little with fellow stuRalph Fiennes dancer, The White Crow adheres dents in Leningrad and bucked Rated R closely to the facts. authority at every opportunity.

The film’s star, Oleg Ivenko, KGB minders followed him as he bares physical resemblance to struck up a friendship with Clara Nureyev and, as principal dancer with the Ta- Saint (Adèle Exarchopoulos), a well-connecttar State Academic Opera and Ballet, he can ed young woman who became instrumental dance. However, The White Crow isn’t primar- in his defection. Even his few friends felt the ily a movie about ballet. It’s not The Red Shoes force of his terrible ego, compensation for his or Black Swan but a nuanced story of a life insecure provincial origins fortified by the unshaped by art and imagination butting against failing love of his mother and encouraged by a repression. As a boy (played by Maksimilian profound awareness of his talent.

28 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

Having spent his entire life in one Napa Valley home, widower Charlie Peck (Dennis Quaid) states he’s happy to sell the house to young marrieds, Scott and Annie Russell (Michael Ealy and Meagan Good). Once the sale in complete, Peck doesn’t follow through on his plans to move to Florida. Instead, he repeatedly shows up at his old home, where he takes an unnatural interest in its condition—and in Annie. Having failed to persuade Peck to leave them alone, Scott beefs up the home’s security. But Peck, whose great grandfather built the house, knows all its secrets and, apparently, all of Scott and Annie’s secrets as well. It’s been a while since Quaid starred in a major film, so it’s a great time for him to play against type as the villain. (Lisa Miller)

[ HOME MOVIES / NOW STREAMING ] n Johnny Thunders - Madrid Memory

Johnny Thunders wasn’t much of a role model but the onetime New York Dolls’ guitarist had an intuitive sense of the rawest essence of rock ’n’ roll. Madrid Memory caught him on a decent night on tour in Spain, 1984. Backed by a solid garage outfit, Thunders was nimble and animated as he tore through rock staples (“Pipeline”) along with a gaggle of numbers associated with his own career (“Personality Crisis,”“Born to Lose”).

n Blaze

Blaze (2018) is about a singer/songwriter few people know anything about.

Not a conventional music biography but an imaginative recreation, Ethan Hawke’s film concerns Blaze Foley (Ben Dickey), a charming, loving, talented drunk who wrote ruminative songs in a back-porch country style. As Townes Van Zandt, his better-known pal, explains: “He only went crazy once, but he stayed there.” Charlie Sexton directs the music and Sam Rockwell, Alia Shawkat and Richard Linklater co-star.

n Mélo

French director Alain Resnais is best remembered for Last Year at Marienbad (1961). Years later, with Mélo (1986), he made a movie that seldom moves.

Adapting it from a 1920s stage play about a doomed romantic triangle, Resnais delights in all staginess. The stars in the sky are obviously painted on the ceiling, and the story slips across a handful of beautifully appointed sets whose edits serve as punctuation for an extended conversation between cast members.

n “Fantomas: Three Film Collection”

Fantomas was one of the first supervillains. The pre-World War I French pulp-fiction (and silent movie) character was revived in the 1960s—hot on the heels of 007—for a series of movies by France’s swashbuckler-thriller director André Hunebelle. Played strictly for laughs, the three films collected on this two-disc Blu-ray are spoofs of ’60s intrigue-adventure flicks as bungling cops and reporters-turned-crime fighters chase across land, sea and air in pursuit of an indomitable mastermind.

—David Luhrssen SHEPHERD EXPRESS

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 29

A&E::BOOKS

BOOK|PREVIEW P R E S E N T S

T H E

4TH ANNUAL

VETERANS BUSINESS CONFERENCE THURSDAY, MAY 23, 2019 Business Expo, Eight Breakout Sessions, Awards Luncheon

Keynote Speaker: Bud Selig Tickets available at wiveteranschamber.org With Support From:

Join us at Potawatomi Hotel and Casino 1721 W Canal St. Milwaukee, WI 53233

30 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

Milwaukee’s ‘Poison Pen’ Novelist at the Marcus Center ::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN

B

ill Zaferos’ novel Poison Pen is funny—outrageously so, as its misanthropic protagonist from small-town Wisconsin stumbles from disaster into catastrophe after encountering the host of a TV game show whose maniacal premise involves daring its participants to risk their lives for cash and prizes.

One good thing about the protagonist: like his author, he loves Kurt Vonnegut. “That influence came through as a characteristic of Poison Pen’s protagonist. It’s so much a part of me that I decided to make it part of the character as a kind of homage to Vonnegut’s oeuvre,” says Zaferos, a Milwaukee writer who spent most of his career in journalism.

Not unlike Vonnegut’s novels, Poison Pen is written in short bursts of humor and runs on a spectrum from puckish to vitriolic. “The relationship between me and the protagonist is complicated,” Zaferos says. He is its author on a really bad day, fused with “people I’ve known who have a rather dour view of the human condition. I made his gripes about life as kind of an over-sized version of a person who’s had enough—who just wants to be left alone to watch ‘The Beverly Hillbillies,’ drink beer and eat cheese sticks.”

Poison Pen paints a venomous panorama of a dead-to-the-world Wisconsin burg, the fictional Hammertown, whose reason for existence all but ended circa 1980 when the hammer industry moved offshore. Little wonder the game show hosted by Jerry Most is so popular among the town’s inhabitants, who find little reason to live. “It wasn’t too much of a stretch to come up with that character,” Zaferos says, explaining that he’s a composite. “Game show hosts always seemed to hold more esteem, given their somewhat more limited contributions to society than, say, an ER nurse or a teacher.”

Bill Zaferos will discuss Poison Pen at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, May 15 at the Marcus Center for the Performing Arts’ Rehearsal Hall A, 929 N. Water St. Tickets are $29 with proceeds going to the Milwaukee chapter of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::OFFTHECUFF

OFF THE CUFF WITH INCARCERATED WORKERS ORGANIZING COMMITTEE’S ALAN SCHULTZ ::BY JEAN-GABRIEL FERNANDEZ

I

ncarcerated Workers Organizing Committee (IWOC) is an organization dedicated to giving a voice to incarcerated people and to ending human rights abuse in American prisons. The Wisconsin branch of IWOC recently published an investigation documenting “a pattern of medical neglect, mistreatment, exploitation and other forms of abuse” in state prisons. Off the Cuff talked with Alan Schultz, a member of IWOC’s National Steering Committee and former prisoner.

Can you explain what IWOC is?

It was created as a labor of love in 2015 and was mainly inspired

by George Jackson’s ideas on unionizing incarcerated people.

Extensive letter-writing campaigns ensued, networks of inside organizers and pen pals grew and eventually, folks who had been working with other abolitionist groups were asked to support a prison strike in 2016. Milwaukee’s IWOC started in a similar manner—through letter-writing campaigns, actions and meetings to directly affect change in the Wisconsin Department of Corrections (DOC).

What does IWOC do specifically?

IWOC is meant to aid those incarcerated by acting as a conduit of communication for them, to assist in facilitating the autonomy and selforganization of incarcerated people to have some control over their workplaces, living environments, health care, treatment, safety, food and visitations. We investigate grievances we hear from incarcerated people, which can become smaller issues that can be built into a portion of a campaign.

The Milwaukee IWOC has worked toward get-

CARROLL STUDIOS OF PHOTOGRAPHY

Fighting for the Rights of the Imprisoned

ting transparency and changes in the DOC’s Committee on Inmate Youth Deaths (COIYD) and has conducted phone and email zaps to try to prevent harm to incarcerated people, among many other things. We routinely send a newsletter of incarcerated people’s messages of their conditions at their prison, their poems, artwork and words of encouragement for others in similar situations. We’ve also conducted outside pickets of facilities—sometimes informational ones like we have been doing with the CLOSEmsdf campaign for more than two years now, once a month.

Why do you want to close the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF)?

There are many issues with the facility. I have personally known two of the 17 people who’ve died there since 2001. There is no sunlight at MSDF; no outdoor recreation. It’s severely overcrowded, resulting in three people being placed in cells not meant to house that many; one person must sleep on a plastic “boat,” which has to be slid out in front of the cell’s only toilet, and incarcerated individuals have to spend more time than they should in cells as MSDF is severely understaffed. I encourage people to visit the CLOSEmsdf. org website to better understand the entire issue.

What are some other prison practices IWOC denounces?

The Wisconsin DOC censors mail if it is deemed to potentially facilitate inside organizing, and Wisconsin has one of the nation’s most censored prison mail systems. The letters, if rejected by the institution, tend to be marked “Return to Sender,” and the incarcerated person is usually informed a letter came but was rejected and vaguely states what the reason for the rejection was. Additionally, unionizing is considered “group resistance” and is enough to get a person put in solitary confinement. In some states (though not Wisconsin currently), that could be considered gang affiliation and cause one to get a gang enhancement tacked on to a pending sentence, which could get you housed in a different pod or unit that could prove more dangerous.

What are some of IWOC’s achievements?

We’ve helped link incarcerated people to legal assistance, as well as to relatives they’d lost contact with. IWOC has interviewed family members of those who’ve committed suicide while incarcerated and spoken on their behalf at COIYD meetings. Recently, we’ve gotten the COIYD to at least agree to look into whether they can divulge precisely how many people are dying in each separate prison so we can pinpoint if one is an outlier in causing or having deaths associated with it. This committee has existed since 2005, yet nobody knows what its recommendations are, and they refuse to acknowledge open records requests.

Shepherd

Swag Get it here: theshepstore.com

Alan Schultz PHOTO BY LAUREN MILLER SHEPHERD EXPRESS

M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 31

::HEARMEOUT The mission of the Milwaukee LGBT Community Center is to further develop our vibrant lesbian, gay, transgender community in the greater Milwaukee area, thus improving the quality of life for all of us. This is supported by the Center’s leadership in community building, health promotion, advocacy and communications.

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I’ve had it! I can’t take it anymore and must say something. Or maybe I should say my friends and I can’t take it anymore, and today the decision was made to reach out to you for your input.

We have two friends who are pillars of the Milwaukee’s LGBTQ community. They have been in a healthy relationship with one another for years, and they are successful, great guys. Everyone loves them.

They recently brought a third, much younger man into their relationship. (They’re about 30 years older than this 20-year-old.)

They’ve made their threesome very public, consistently pay the “boy’s” way and have even taken him on vacation. As friends of the couple, we’re expected to act as if this situation is a good thing, accept the third wheel as a friend and ignore his extreme immaturity.

At a very nice daytime fundraiser recently, the “boy” practically had his fingers up the ass of one of the two guys, embarrassing all of us. We’re tired of having this hustler/gold digger around, pretending we’re friends with him and watching our two real friends spend so much money on him.

Do we tell our friends how we truly feel about their “throuple” or continue to act as though all is well?

Love You, Concerned Amigos

Dear Amigos,

Take a deep breath, have a seat... maybe pour yourself a drink, because I don’t think you’re going to like what I have to say. (Deep breaths, deep breaths.) While I understand your concerns for your friends’ well-being, this really isn’t any of your business. (There!

I said it!) You’re not paying for the “boy,” are you? You’re not paying for his vacations, right? Buying him drinks? Sleeping with him? No? Then, it’s really little matter to you.

As for not liking the third wheel, I’d suggest you simply grin and bear it. If you care about your two friends and wish to keep your relationship with them, you don’t have much choice but to quietly acquiesce where this situation is concerned. You may not like it but be happy for your friends’ happiness and mind your own bees’ wax when it comes to your amigos’ love life.

::RUTHIE’SSOCIALCALENDAR May 9—Dora Diamond’s Royal Revue at The High Note (645 N. James Lovell St.): Add a bit of panache to the week when you take in this 11 p.m. variety show.

Dora Diamond hosts an evening of live vocals, drag performances, comedy and more guaranteed to start your weekend off on a classy note.

May 11—Mums for Moms: An Outdoor Shopping Event at West Allis Farmers Market (6501 W. National Ave.): If you haven’t been to this popular South Side market, Mother’s Day is a great reason to check it out. Shop for flowers and plants from local growers and vendors while enjoying live music from Roxie Beane and so much more during the free 1-6 p.m. market.

May 11—Remember When: Milwaukee Drag History Party at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): Kick off the summer of Stonewall’s 50th anniversary with this 3-6 p.m. party hosted by Wisconsin LGBTQ History Project. Bring photos and memorabilia from the Milwaukee’s golden age of drag, share your stories of coming out, going out and getting down in Cream City back in the day and relish the open mic session at 4 p.m. Enjoy drink specials, a beer bust and more. A $1 donation at the door is suggested, benefiting the Pridefest Plus One campaign.

May 12—LGBT-Friendly Bike Blessing at Unitarian Church North (13800 N. Port Washington Road, Mequon): Are you a biker? Grab your leather coat and ride your hog to this church for a bike blessing. Enjoy a 10 a.m. mass with an 11:15 a.m. blessing of the bikes. The $5 event ends with a group ride to lunch.

May 12—Bears and Bushes Beard Competition at Kruz (354 E. National Ave.): Who doesn’t like a hairy hottie? I do! So, you better believe my panties are going to hit the floor when the city’s best bear men descend upon Kruz Levi/leather bar for a bit fun. Bring your best face forward for the competition, beer bust, raffles and more. The bear-lovers bash runs 3-7 p.m.

May 12—“Countess and Friends” at The Pabst Theater (144 E. Wells St.): If you’re a fan of Bravo’s “Real Housewives of New York,” you’re familiar with Countess Luann’s rise in the cabaret world. If you’re not a fan of the show, you still don’t want to miss Luann De Lesseps’ record-breaking tour. Enjoy a night with the reality star during the 7 p.m. concert. Swing by pabsttheater.org first, however, and nab your $55-$75 tickets.

May 12—Cher’s “Here We Go Again” Tour at Fiserv Forum (1111 Vel R. Phillips Ave.): Star... diva... goddess... Whatever you call her, nothing summarizes the magic and majesty of Cher. Celebrate the music that delivered so much happiness to so many when Cher brings her celebrated tour to Milwaukee. Tickets to the 8 p.m. concert run $59.95 to $500.

May 15—Tarot, Wine and Song: An Intimate Evening with Jen Cintron at The Pasta Tree Restaurant (1503 N. Farwell Ave.): Take date night to a new level with this 6:30 p.m. evening of live music from sultry sensation Jen Cintron. Your ticket also includes a one-card tarot reading from Jen as well. Enjoy a special appetizer menu, cash bar, incredible wine selection and more. See paypal.me/tarotjen for $20 reservations.

Ask Ruthie a question or share your events with her at dearruthie@shepex.com. Follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook at Dear Ruthie.

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

::MYLGBTQPoint of View

On Hate and Hope in America and Milwaukee ::BY PAUL MASTERSON

L

ast Saturday, in charming Bay View, there was an anti-LGBTQ rally. It seems a local cell of the Roman Catholic-inspired, extremist American Society for the Defense of Tradition, Family and Property (TFP) decided to spew their homophobia in protest of a Drag Queen Story Hour. The TFP is the same group that petitioned against a Marquette University LGBTQ alumni dance held last year in March (see my March 27, 2018 column on the subject). Deemed a heretical cult by mainstream Catholics, its members aren’t particularly fond of them either, calling the church’s more moderate modern thinkers “apostates” and Popes John Paul II and Francis I satanic.

ASK THE ANTI-AGING EXPERT JENNIFER HIPP 262-696-9868 Uthologymedical.com Submit your questions at info@uthology.com

Anyway, along with the obligatory banners emblazoned with hateful slogans, the TFP brought an effigy of their patron Madonna (the virgin one, not the “Like a Virgin” one). But, as the group assembled, a clarion went out on social media and a counter-demonstration ensued.

A local resident reported being called a “faggot” by a protester. Eventually, everybody left, and Bay View returned to its respectably gay and hipster calm.

Were it not for the unrelenting litany of homophobic offences we endure nowadays, like Brother Ron’s recent Jesus Car breakdown, this otherwise silly slice of life in America would be laughable. But today, each homophobic microaggression, as innocuous as it might seem, enhances the macroaggression of institutionalized hate and has consequences.

In mid-April, 15-year-old Nigel Shelby, an Alabama high school freshman, committed suicide. He was gay, out, black and bullied.

One reporter covering the story wrote “Kids can be cruel.” True enough, but the reality is that cruelty is taught, condoned and often encouraged by adults. As it happened, a local sheriff’s deputy celebrated Nigel’s suicide on his social media page. He subsequently resigned, but he made his point.

Then, while Nigel’s family mourned, news

HE WAS GAY, OUT, BLACK AND BULLIED. ONE REPORTER COVERING THE STORY WROTE “KIDS CAN BE CRUEL.” TRUE ENOUGH, BUT THE REALITY IS THAT CRUELTY IS TAUGHT, CONDONED AND OFTEN ENCOURAGED

BY ADULTS. broke of yet another anti-LGBTQ act of state.

This time it was a Department of Health and Human Services’ (HHS) announcement of a regulation that, according to the Human Rights Campaign, “would allow medical providers

Have a Ball!

to cite their personal beliefs in refusing to provide a broad spectrum of services—including life-saving care—for LGBTQ patients.” HHS released the statement just in time for Holocaust Remembrance Day. Growing up LGBTQ in America can be challenging. If you’re lucky and live in a progressive city like Milwaukee, there are support options that have been shown to reduce youth suicide rates. High school Gay-Straight Alliances exist in a number of schools throughout the Milwaukee Public School system and have proven crucial in instilling a positive awareness of students grappling with their sexual identity, while also improving other students’ attitudes towards them. There’s also the Alliance School, an MPS charter school founded specifically for bullied youth. And, of course, Milwaukee recently joined a growing list of cities and states that ban so-called conversion therapy for minors. Sadly, such infrastructures do not exist throughout Wisconsin, much less throughout the country.

On a positive note, a majority of Americans support the Equality Act now before Congress.

It would guarantee federal protections for LGBTQs. In a recent vote, the House Judiciary Committee approved the bill. All committee Republicans voted against it.

Comment at shepherdexpress.com. n

Have a Ball!

WITH

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www.milwaukeegaysports.com/events M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 33

::MUSIC

ANNA WEBBER

FEATURE | ALBUM REVIEWS | CONCERT REVIEWS | LOCAL MUSIC

DAVID CROSBY DOUBLES DOWN

The outspoken 77-year-old on juggling two new bands and the allure of Twitter ::BY EVAN RYTLEWSKI You’ve released four albums in about as many years, very music writer jumps at the chance to interview David which is a huge amount of music. What’s prompting that? Is Crosby. The 77-year-old Byrds and Crosby, Stills & Nash it the collaborators? veteran is one of rock’s most lovable curmudgeons, the I think it’s two things. I think it’s the collaborators, because rare legacy figure who’s decided there’s nothing to gain they do inspire me. The bands I’ve been in before, Crosby, by biting their tongue. That zero-fucks demeanor has Stills & Nash and Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, were competitive bands. And they were very good bands and we did very made Crosby a favorite on Twitter, though in conversation good work and I’m proud of it, but they weren’t collaborative he’s not nearly as grumpy as his online persona would have bands, they were competitive bands, and that’s a very differyou believe. Even when he’s cussing or complaining, he ent thing. These guys are collaborative workers, and they’ve laughs readily, exuding the warmth and joviality of a favorbrought out all kinds of work from me. ite uncle.

How does a collaboration like that work, though?

Crosby has been uncommonly prolific over the last Because of your stature, there’d almost have to be five years, releasing so much material he’s had an imbalance between you and your younger bandDavid to spread it across two bands: an electric one mates, right?

Crosby he’s dubbed Sky Trails (after his 2017 record No. You’d think, but that’s just history. These people Pabst are all as good as I am. They’re absolutely as good as I of the same name) and an acoustic one called Theater am, so there’s no imbalance at all. Matter of fact, in both Lighthouse (after his 2016 record). All four of bands everybody is a better player than I am. Every Saturday, his recent records have been surprisingly excelsingle player is better than me, and I like it that way.

May 11, lent late-career efforts, especially his latest with 8 p.m.

Are you enjoying touring as much as you are his Lighthouse band, 2018’s Here If You Listen, a graceful, radiant folk rerecording these days? Is there one you prefer more cord that finds Crosby sharing the spotlight with his younger fellow songthan the other now? writers Michael League, Becca Stevens and Michelle Willis. Ahead of his upcomYou know, I love to record, but it’s a very strange situation, ing tour with his Sky Trails Band, which stops at the Pabst Theater on Saturday, man, because we don’t get paid for it anymore. Streaming just May 11, Crosby spoke with the Shepherd about his new bands, touring at 77 and fucked it. What the streaming companies pay us, it’s sort of like you work a job for a month and then you make a nickel. getting himself in trouble on Twitter.

34 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

SHEPHERD EXPRESS

For more MUSIC, log onto shepherdexpress.com

It’s really bad, man. I used to make money off of records, and now I don’t make anything. Nothing. I make nothing off of these records. And that’s sad because the companies are making billions of dollars. The three record companies that own most of the streaming, heh, they’re making something like 19 million dollars a day between them off of streaming, and they’re not paying the artists for shit. That’s a tough thing, because that means that playing live, touring, is my whole living now, and that’s very hard if you’re 77 years old and you can’t sleep on a bus anymore. That gets pretty difficult. But the singing, the time that I’m on stage, is absolutely a total joy. Complete joy. Fantastic, still.

You seem a lot more plugged in than many artists your age, and you seem to spend more time online than most of them. Do you think that changes how you see the world?

Not a great deal, no. I don’t. I’ve always been fascinated with people. To me they’re endlessly interesting, so that’s what leads me to enjoy talking to people on Twitter.

I’m fascinated by them. They interest the hell out of me. No mystery there. I think people… well, I don’t know. I don’t get much out of Facebook, and I get a little bit out of Instagram, but not too much. But on Twitter you can actually talk to people. I do get in trouble there. I’ve gotten in a little bit of trouble every once in a while! A tiny bit.

I think everybody does every once in a while. It’s a platform that really does lend itself to shit starting.

[Laughs] Well it does lend itself to that!

I’ve gotten into a couple fights. I got into a

fight with Kanye West because I think he’s an idiot. But I try mostly not to do that Twitter war thing. I try mostly to communicate with people. It’s interesting.

I used to think that Twitter was a force for good, because it exposed us to so many different ideas and perspectives, including people we may not have thought much about. It seemed like it was making us better informed people by reminding us to consider others. But I think the 2016 election really changed that perception. We saw how Twitter could be weaponized.

Well, I don’t think that’s Twitter’s fault.

I think you’re seeing a truly evil, spoiled 8-year-old child who’s broken into his dad’s office where he was never allowed to go, and he’s running around peeing on all the papers going, “I’ll show you!” And I think his presence on Twitter has degraded it some, because he does weaponize it. It is a way for him to shoot his mouth off in the craziest possible fashion. But I don’t think that degrades the platform; I just think it degrades the man.

A lot of us, if we spend enough time online, feel we need to take a break if the news cycle ever gets too dark and maybe escape from politics for a bit. Do you ever have to step back like that?

Yeah, I go read The Onion! [Laughs] That helps?

Yeah, humor will keep you afloat when almost nothing else will. Humor and music.

David Crosby plays the Pabst Theater on Saturday, May 11, at 8 p.m. For a longer version of this interview, visit shepherdexpress.com.

WHAT THE STREAMING COMPANIES PAY US, IT’S SORT OF LIKE YOU WORK A JOB FOR A MONTH AND THEN YOU MAKE A NICKEL. IT’S REALLY BAD, MAN. I USED TO MAKE MONEY OFF OF RECORDS, AND NOW I DON’T MAKE ANYTHING. SHEPHERD EXPRESS

M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 35

::LOCALMUSIC

::CONCERTREVIEW

JOE JACKSON REMAINED PROUDLY HARD TO PIN DOWN AT THE PABST THEATER ::BY THOMAS MICHALSKI

D

espite decades spent building a solid career in the industry, including chart-topping hits as well as critical success, Joe Jackson is a name that tends to fall through the cracks of most popular music histories, and it’s not too hard to understand why.

In addition to having the gold standard of generically forgettable names, his music has for 40 years stubbornly refused to be pinned down with any accuracy, largely eluding the simplistic categories that marketing types and journalists rely on to quickly convey what an artist is all about. Instead, he tends to be filed away under one of those nebulous non-genres such as “new wave,”“singersongwriter” or just “pop,” mostly because his stylistically adventurous, piano-driven compositions fail to fit in anywhere else.

Monday night at the Pabst Theater, however, that ill-defined sound came into sharp focus throughout a career-spanning retrospective, which managed to pull off the difficult trick of looking backward without ever really lapsing into any schmaltzy nostalgia. Even the die-hard audience, whose general age and enthusiasm suggested they had followed his career for some time, seemed equally excited to hear unfamiliar material as they were the tried-and-true hits. From the moment his road-tested backing band started filtering on, slowing filling in a metronomic beat with the seductive textures of the brand-new “Alchemy,” the crowd was with them lock, stock and barrel. The public was quickly rewarded with a pair of early classics, “One More Time” and the ubiquitous radio-staple “Is She Really Going Out with Him?” While horribly overplayed, the latter still packs a punch in the hands of Jackson and his crack support crew (of course, it doesn’t hurt when everyone in the room knows exactly when to provide backing vocals). Once it was out of the way though, he settled in and, after apologizing for being rained out at Summerfest his last time in town, explained the layout of the evening’s program, a decade-by-decade look at his eccentric body of work peppered with fresh tracks from this year’s The Fool. While relevant new cuts like the punky “Fabulously Absolute” largely held their own, the older outings, like “Another World” (1980s), “Stranger Than Fiction” (1990s) or his brilliantly inside-out version of The Beatles’ alreadyreversed “Rain” (2000s), inevitably stole the show.

Reaching the present, Jackson and company jumped into a less chronological encore, the standout of which had to be a meticulously recreated version of his 1982 classic “Steppin’ Out,” a track built wholly in the studio and as such largely impractical to faithfully pull off live. Here however, in addition to wheeling out a glockenspiel, Jackson went so far as to lug out the same Korg drum machine used in the original recording, hoping against hope that tonight wasn’t the night it gave up the ghost. While a high point, the crowd-pleasers didn’t stop there, gradually winding to a rest with a reprise of the first song, neatly wrapping up a night of music that was incredibly easy to enjoy, if equally hard to categorize.

Plasticland Revisits the Psychedelic Revival

our albums,” Frankovic promises. “It will be a retrospective—the highlight of music we made over the years, a legacy show.

Debuting on their own label in 1980 with the quirky dreamy single “Mink Dress,” Plasticland went on to release LPs for many labels including Lolita (France), Enigma (U.S.), Midnight (U.S.) and Repulsion (Germany). In recent years, compilations have been issued by Rykodisc and Cherry Red. They never toured more than minimally, hitting New York and Boston on the east, venturing west to Seattle and Vancouver and no further north than Montreal or south than Pittsburgh. Their enduring popularity is the result of the recordings they left behind.

Plasticland was steeped more deeply than most of the ::BY DAVID LUHRSSEN neo-psychedelic cohort by ’60s England, down to their y the late 1980s, the psychedelic impulse Carnaby Street shoes, Tomorrow pop whimsy and lofting coalesced as acid house, trip-hop and oth- Pretty Things harmonies. “I wanted to put my own stamp er mutant electronica, but when that decade on the genre,” says Rehse, the band’s sole lyricist and cowbegan, few artists were willing to wave the riter of much of its music. Safe to say, no ’60s psych band multicolored banner of mind-expanded con- came close to the theme of Rehse’s “Nonstop Kitchen,” sciousness. When Plasticland debuted in 1980, denizens whose lyric is an exasperated account of housecleaning. of the punk rock circuit where they played (there were few Plasticland occasionally replicated the airy visions of other alternative venues at the time) didn’t know what to 1967, but many of their songs conveyed deeper anxieties make of them. Everyone was supposed to be in black or about a society that seeks to define and curb the imagination. The jittery neurosis of “Too Many Fingers” comes flannel. What’s with the paisley and striped trousers?

Although they didn’t know it at the time, in that pre- closer than most of their tracks to the demented American internet age when ideas traveled more slowly, Plasticland garage psychedelia of The Thirteenth Floor Elevators.

Plasticland’s music was usually propelled by searing was part of an emerging wave of neo-psychedelic rock bands that surged across the ’80s alt-scene and continues fuzz distortion or hard-ringing jangle, lifted by soaring harmonies and delivered by Rehse with high to expand the horizons of garage bands and vocal drama or sardonic glee. The songs roots rockers today. For many fans of psywere short and pointed, ’60s pop-rock marchedelia around the world, the Milwaukee Plasticland ried to distorted acidic noise. Like many of band became a touchstone. Plasticland never Shank Hall their Milwaukee shows in the ’80s, their made the cover of Rolling Stone but they got Saturday, upcoming performance will be multimedia, their picture inside, part of a mid-’80s article surrounded by Dale Kaminski’s liquid lights May 11, 8 p.m. surveying the resurgence of music that many and projected images. had tucked away in the ’60s memory box.

“It seems that our legacy is growing, not The classic lineup of Plasticland is back for its first show in more than a decade—and possibly its fading,” Frankovic says. “We keep being reissued on CD. last. The founding members—Glen Rehse (vocals), John People are downloading our music. I went on Amazon and Frankovic (bass) and Victor Demechei (drums)—will be saw four pages of Plasticland product. The buzz continjoined by their mid-’80s through early ’90s lead guitarist, ues to murmur, 40 years after the fact and much to my Dan Mullen, and augmented by a second guitarist, an old surprise.”

Plasticland will perform at Shank Hall, 1434 N. Farfriend, Leroy Buth, from Milwaukee’s pioneering punk well Ave., on Saturday, May 11, at 8 p.m. Tickets are availband The Lubricants.

“We’ll be playing a mix of recorded songs from all of able at ticketweb.com.

B

Plasticland 36 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

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M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 37

MUSIC::LISTINGS

::ALBUMS Lance King ReProgram

(NIGHTMARE RECORDS) Metal vocalist Lance King founded Minnesota-based Nightmare Records to issue “uplifting and thoughtprovoking music for the hard-music fan.” The label has done exactly that over the course of almost 30 years, with memorable releases that help give metal a good name. Now, you can add King’s second solo album, ReProgram, to the list of albums that fulfill Nightmare’s mission. Delivering what he calls “celestial metal,” King embraces positivity in these negative times, reminding listeners that “it’s not as bad as they say” on the speedy “Chaotica” and urging everybody to wake up and “end the epidemic” of a facts-don’t-matter culture in “Wide Open”—the album’s heaviest and angriest track. King possesses a versatile voice well-suited to melodic metal. On ReProgram, you can hear influences that include Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden), James LaBrie (Dream Theater) and Geoff Tate (Queensrÿche). Fans of those artists will find plenty of life-affirming performances here.

—Michael Popke

The New Vintage Frets and Friends The Wisconsin/ Vega Project

Mandolin was a popular instrument at the start of the 20th century and mandolin orchestras were as prevalent as DJs are today. The Wisconsin/Vega Project is an outgrowth of America’s longest-running band of its kind, the Milwaukee Mandolin Orchestra. “Vega” refers to Boston’s Vega Company, manufacturer of mandolins in the early decades of the last century and the album’s songs were chosen for having some connection with the Badger State. The opening number, “Hall’s Blue Ribbon March,” references a leading brewery in the city that meant beer. Some selections were based on arrangements used by local mandolin bands of an earlier era, and others were written by Milwaukee composers. Most of the music exudes the casual, Sunday afternoon-at-the-beer-garden elegance of a lost epoch.

Nationally known mandolinist David Grisman guest stars on the 1909 tune “Dancing Dolls.”

—David Luhrssen

The OGJB Quartet

Bamako (TUM RECORDS) Jazz has always included improvisation, but since the 1950s some jazz musicians began to improvise outside traditional structures of melody and harmony—and after all those decades, the music that results remains challenging. Saxophonist Oliver Lake and drummer Barry Altschul were already in the caravan as jazz ventured off into the unknown. They are still at it in the OGJB Quartet, a combo with two younger musicians, cornetist Graham Haynes and bassist Joe Fonda. The woodwinds circle and intersect meaningfully, suggesting melodies beyond the normal range as Fonda lays down a rhythmic thrum and Altschul tackles the beat from the left-hand side. With its African influences, Bamako should appeal to devotees of Lake’s earlier ensemble, the World Saxophone Quartet.

—David Luhrssen

38 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

To list your event, go to shepherdexpress.com/events and click submit an event

THURSDAY, MAY 9

Cactus Club, Joshua Powell w/Endless Era & Newvices Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), The New Pioneers Caroline’s Jazz Club, Scott Napoli Jazz Quartet County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Acoustic Irish Folk w/ Barry Dodd Jackalope Lounj, Big Beat MKE 2019 First Round Battles: Four Giants vs. Trademark & James Ashen vs. GLDN Child.

MKE Performers: Nile and Phat Nerdz Jazz Estate, Naomi Ayala Trio Kelly’s Bleachers (Big Bend), JJ Eckl Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Another One (Grateful Dead tribute) Mason Street Grill, Mark Thierfelder Jazz Trio (5:30pm) Milwaukee, The 4th Annual Cream City Comedy Festival Miramar Theatre, Sonic Destruction w/Atomick, Davilla, Destinesia, Foolish & Qurli (all-ages, 9pm) O’Donoghues Irish Pub (Elm Grove), The All-Star SUPERband (6pm) Oasis Jazz Bar and Grill, Cameron Webb Motown On the Bayou, Open Mic Comedy w/host The Original Darryl Hill Pabst Theater, ARRIVAL: The Music of ABBA Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Brecken Miles Duo Rave / Eagles Club, Hatebreed w/Obituary, Madball, Prong & Skeletal Remains (all-ages, 6:30pm) Rounding Third Bar and Grill, World’s Funniest Free Comedy Show Saloon on Calhoun with Bacon, Amplified Artist Series: Steve Beguhn Shank Hall, Session Americana Sheryl’s Club 175 (Slinger), Acoustic Jam w/Milwaukee Mike & Downtown Julius The Back Room at Colectivo, THAD w/Keith Pulvermacher The Bay Restaurant, CP & Stoll w/Chris Peppas & Jeff Stoll The Packing House Restaurant, Barbara Stephan & Peter Mac (6pm) Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Martini Jazz Lounge: Manty Ellis Trio Up & Under Pub, A No Vacancy Comedy Open Mic

FRIDAY, MAY 10

Alley Cat Lounge (Five O’Clock Steakhouse), Ali & Doug Duo American Legion Post #399 (Okauchee), Our House American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), Bobby Way and JJ Brooks Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Julie’s Piano Karaoke Anodyne Coffee, Paul Cebar Tomorrow Sound Cactus Club, Tacocat w/Sammi Lanzetta & Heavy Looks Caroline’s Jazz Club, Eddie Butts Quartet Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Lyric Advisory Board w/The Hatchets (8pm); DJ: John Riepenhoff & Sara Caron (10pm) Clarke Hotel (Waukesha), Dick Eliot Jazz Guitar (6pm) ComedySportz Milwaukee, ComedySportz Milwaukee!

Company Brewing, Resurrectionists w/Union Specific & Lady Cannon County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Traditional Irish Ceilidh Session Harbor Lite Yacht Club (Racine), The Blues Disciples Iron Mike’s (Franklin), Open Jam Session w/Steve Nitros & Friends Jazz Estate, Donna Woodall Group (8pm), Late Night Session: Tommy Antonic Trio (11:30pm) Kochanski’s Concertina Beer Hall, Honkytonkitis w/ Rockabilly Rebels Lakefront Brewery, Brewhaus Polka Kings (5:30pm) Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Urban Empress and the Urbanites album release Mamie’s, Harvey Westmoreland Mason Street Grill, Phil Seed Trio (6pm) Milwaukee, The 4th Annual Cream City Comedy Festival Miramar Theatre, Dion Timmer & Dubloadz Kompany (all-ages, 9pm) MugZ’s Pub and Grill (Muskego), Neil Diamond Tribute w/Eric Diamond (6pm) Pabst Theater, Professor Brian Cox Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: KIC Duo Rave / Eagles Club, FM 102/1 Big Spring Show w/The 1975, Pale Waves & No Rome (all-ages, 7pm) Route 20 Outhouse (Sturtevant), Master of Puppets w/ Killmister (ages 18-plus, 7:30pm) Saloon on Calhoun with Bacon, Joe 2.0

Shank Hall, Sleepersound w/Nastos & Spirits Having Fun Smith Bros. Coffee House (Port Washington), No Show Cadillac Spring City Wine House (Waukesha), Andrew Gelles The Baaree (Thiensville), Friday Night Live w/Prof.

Pinkerton and The Magnificents (6pm) The Back Room at Colectivo, Willie Watson w/Kate Rhudy The Bay Restaurant, VIVO w/Warren Wiegratz The Packing House Restaurant, The Barbara Stephan Group (6:30pm) Turner Hall Ballroom, truTV Presents Tacoma FD’s Heffernan Lemme Live Up & Under Pub, Autumn Reverie Var Gallery & Studios, Subjective: A Comedic Showing 4th Anniversary Show!

SATURDAY, MAY 11

American Legion Post #449 (Brookfield), The Ricochettes Brewtown Eatery, Scotch and Soda Cactus Club, Platinum Boys w/Assault and Battery & Population Control Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Sam Llanas Caroline’s Jazz Club, The Paul Spencer Band w/James Sodke, Michael Ritter, Warren Wiegratz & Dave “Smitty” Smith Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Punk Guilt w/Mites (8pm); DJ: Ryan Fox (10pm) ComedySportz Milwaukee, Laughing Liberally Milwaukee Cue Club of Wisconsin (Waukesha), The RUSH Tribute Project Dopp’s Bar & Grill, Bill Klemp’s B-Day Party w/Wayne Murphy & The Lawmen Fire On Water, El Emengi (Grateful Dead tribute) Five O’Clock Steakhouse, Kirk Tatnall Glen Cafe, Jim the Piano Man (5pm) Hilton Milwaukee City Center, Vocals & Keys Jazz Estate, Russ Nolan and the Johannes Wallmann Trio (8pm), Late Night Session: Jesse Montijo Trane Tracks (11:30pm) Kelly’s Bleachers (Big Bend), Up All Night Kochanski’s Concertina Beer Hall, The MilBillies w/ Beaumont James & The Wild Claims Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Fuzzysurf’s LP release w/Flat Teeth & Cashfire Sunset Mason Street Grill, Jonathan Wade Trio (6pm) McAuliffe’s Pub (Racine), Resistance w/The Flame and the Void, & Morningstar Mezcalero Restaurant, Larry Lynne Band Milwaukee, The 4th Annual Cream City Comedy Festival Miramar Theatre, Nirvana - Nirvana Tribute Band (allages, 9pm) Pabst Theater, David Crosby & Friends Quarters Rock and Roll Palace, Man Random w/The Unitaskers & Awkward Terrible Rave / Eagles Club, In This Moment w/Sevendust (allages, 8pm), Tech N9ne w/Krizz Kaliko, Dax, ¡MAYDAY! & UBI of Ces Cru (all-ages, 8pm) Riverwest Jazz Gallery Center for the Arts, A Flock of Siegers Riverwest Public House, Anecdote: A Funny Storytelling Showcase Rubicon Ranch, Jude and The Dudes Saloon on Calhoun with Bacon, The Screamin’ Cucumbers Shank Hall, Plasticland The Back Room at Colectivo, Caroline Rose w/Kississippi The Cheel (Thiensville), The Blues Disciples The Coffee House, Bill Camplin w/Heather Styka The Landing Food & Spirits, Joe Kadlec The Landing at Hoyt Park, Walk to End Lupus Now 2019 w/Close Enuf Band (9:30am) The Packing House Restaurant, Joe Jordan & The Soul Trio (6:30pm) Turner Hall Ballroom, Parachute w/Billy Raffoul Up & Under Pub, Thee Grateful Dub Band

SUNDAY, MAY 12

Angelo’s Piano Lounge, Live Karaoke w/Julie Brandenburg Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Session Americana Circle-A Cafe, Alive at Eight: Texas Dave Trio (8pm); DJ: Hot Dog! Classic Country Spin (10pm) County Clare Irish Inn & Pub, Dick Eliot Jazz Guitar (5:30pm)

Dopp’s Bar & Grill, CCMC Open Jam w/Wayne Murphy & The Lawmen (2pm) Fiserv Forum, Cher J&B’s Blue Ribbon Bar and Grill, The Players Jam Jazz Estate, Mom’s Day Matinee w/Caley Conway Band, Pat Keen, and Nickel&Rose (6pm) Milwaukee, The 4th Annual Cream City Comedy Festival Pabst Theater, Countess & Friends Rounding Third Bar and Grill, The Dangerously Strong Comedy Open Mic Shank Hall, Steve Hofstetter The Baaree (Thiensville), Sunday Funday Open Jam w/ Colin Loman & Friends (4pm) The Back Room at Colectivo, Will Hoge Turner Hall Ballroom, Kelly Kellz 9th Annual Mother’s Day Show Var Gallery & Studios, Neidhoefer w/Father Sky

MONDAY, MAY 13

Cactus Club, TEEN w/Lauryl Sulfate & Her Ladies of Leisure Jazz Estate, UWM Combo (7pm), Mark Davis Jazz Trio (8:30pm) Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Poet’s Monday w/host Timothy Kloss & featured reader Ellen C. Warren (sign-up 7:30pm, 8-11pm) Mason Street Grill, Joel Burt Duo (5:30pm) Paulie’s Pub and Eatery, Open Jam: Christopher John & Friends w/featured band The Crimson Club, Metal Mondays Up & Under Pub, Open Mic w/Marshall McGhee and the Wanderers

TUESDAY, MAY 14

Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Peter Mulvey, SistaStrings, Paul Cebar & Bill Camplin Club Garibaldi, Vicious Rumors w/Steel Iron Jazz Estate, Sweet Sheiks Kim’s Lakeside (Pewaukee), Robert Allen Jr. & Friends Mamie’s, Open Blues Jam w/Stokes Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) McAuliffe’s Pub (Racine), The Jim Yorgan Sextet Miramar Theatre, Tuesday Open Mic w/host Sandy Weisto (sign-up 7:30pm, all-ages) Pabst Theater, Johnny Marr Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Al White (4pm) Red Circle Inn, Dick Eliot & Greg Shaffer (6pm) Riverwest Jazz Gallery Center for the Arts, Jazz Jam Session The Baaree (Thiensville), Alive After 5 w/Kyle Feerick & Sean Williamson (6pm) The Back Room at Colectivo, Samiam w/Off With Their Heads Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Transfer House Band w/Marge Eiseman B-Day

WEDNESDAY, MAY 15

Anodyne Coffee, Walter Salas-Humara (from The Silos) Cactus Club, Molly Burch (Captured Tracks) w/Andy Jenkins Cafe Carpe (Fort Atkinson), Peter Mulvey, Anna Tivel, Shane Leonard & Joe Jencks Caroline’s Jazz Club, Wicked Long Day Conway’s Smokin’ Bar & Grill, Open Jam w/Big Wisconsin Johnson Glen Cafe, Jim the Piano Man (5pm) Hudson Business Lounge and Cafe, Jazz at Noon: Don Linke and Friends Iron Mike’s (Franklin), B Lee Nelson Acoustic Jam Jazz Estate, Juhani Jazz Trio Kochanski’s Concertina Beer Hall, Polka Open Jam Linneman’s Riverwest Inn, Acoustic Open Stage w/ feature Jesse & Katie (sign-up 7:30pm, start 8pm) Mason Street Grill, Jamie Breiwick Group (5:30pm) Paulie’s Field Trip, Wednesday Night Afterparty w/Dave Wacker & guests Potawatomi Hotel & Casino, In Bar 360: Al White Sunset Grill Pewaukee, Robert Allen Jr. & Friends Tally’s Tap & Eatery (Waukesha), Tomm Lehnigk The Cheel (Thiensville), Frankie Kae w/Misha Siegfried (6:30pm) The Landing at Hoyt Park, The MilBillies (5pm) The Packing House Restaurant, Carmen Nickerson & Kostia Efimov (6pm)

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M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 39

BET ON IT

THEME CROSSWORD

By James Barrick

Complete the grid so that every row, column and 3x3 box contains every digit from 1 to 9 inclusively.

© 2019 United Feature Syndicate, Dist. by Andrews McMeel Syndication

40 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

DOWN 1. After zeta, before theta 2. Queen 3. Star of a kind 4. Bounded scope 5. Movie-set lighting tech 6. Winged 7. — Queen of Scots 8. Entertainment award 9. Material used in cabinetry 10. Thin 11. Malediction 12. Theater area: Abbr.

13. Park and —

14. Correct a text 15. Irked 16. Celtic language 17. Kanten 18. Grant or Gehrig 28. — of March 29. Ventilates 30. Quite a long time 34. Umbra 35. Figure in a bullring 36. Starting event 37. Threshold 38. Cooperates: 2 wds.

39. Karate expert 40. Labels 41. ISU’s home 42. Craze 43. Negotiations result 45. A condiment 46. Worker in a lab coat 49. Leather 50. Some musical compositions 51. River in France 53. Buscemi or Carell 54. — -pie 55. Homer’s “Iliad” and “Odyssey” 57. Flat fish 59. River port in France 60. Goose genus 62. Pour

63. Equines 64. Prima ballerina 65. Putter 66. Performing groups 70. — mater 71. Hoodlike cap 72. Serv. branch 73. Interpretation 75. Toe the line 78. Novelist — Anderson 79. Like an unspoiled place 80. The Emerald Isle 82. Preserve 83. Old ointment 84. Gambling game 86. Profuse 87. Hip boots 88. Desert region 90. Goddesses of seasons 91. Insert mark 92. — and aft 93. Leggy creature 94. Lhasa — 95. Denomination 96. River in Belgium 97. Part of NSA 98. Before long 99. Punta del — 100. Prized person 104. Make a left

Solution to last week’s puzzle

5/2 Solution

WORD FIND This is a theme puzzle with the subject stated below. Find the listed words in the grid. (They may run in any direction but always in a straight line. Some letters are used more than once.) Ring each word as you find it and when you have completed the puzzle, there will be 20 letters left over. They spell out the alternative theme of the puzzle.

Target shooting Solution: 20 Letters

© 2019 Australian Word Games Dist. by Creators Syndicate Inc.

74. — the pity 76. Prov. in Canada 77. Leave behind 78. Bridges 79. Filament 80. Ambulatory event 81. “Mamma —!”

82. Chinese dynasty 83. Goes carefully 84. Chophouse order 85. Moneyed 87. Like a toad 88. Weapons for cavalrymen 89. Timetable abbr.

90. A lagomorph 91. Caution 92. End of the quip: 6 wds.

100. Vast desert area 101. — citato 102. Papal crown 103. Eat a snack 105. Discord personified 106. Jack Klugman role 107. Organic compound 108. Jot 109. Engage 110. Is overly fond 111. Kind of wing 112. Freshly

Aim Ammunition Arm Barrel Bird Bolt Bore Breech Butt Caps Care Chamber Compete Concentrate Crimp Drag

Eight Ejector Explosive Fire Gauge Guns Hide Hit Hollownosed Jacket Lock Magpie Oils Out

Pin Plug Points Poke Pull Revolver Ricochet Rifle Runner Shot Skeet Target Test Wad Way

5/2 Solution: Need to get away

Solution: Practicing at the range

ACROSS 1. Idle or Ambler 5. Computer-fun enthusiast 10. Twenty 15. Resound 19. A tortilla, filled 20. Texas fortress 21. Jewish holy day 22. Post hoc — propter hoc 23. Unknown author: Abbr.

24. Homesteads 25. — — Triomphe 26. OT name 27. Start of a quip by Archie Bunker: 5 wds.

31. — fixe 32. Knowing 33. Female rabbit 34. Cannabis enthusiast 37. A kind of allergen 39. Norm 44. Dreams 45. Storage structures 46. Vanquishes 47. West or Murray 48. Son of Zeus and Hera 49. Coleslaw, e.g.

50. Tint 51. Name in video game development 52. Lair 53. Spoil 54. Oppose 55. Kind of painting 56. Brother of Electra 58. Penstock 60. Abbr. on an envelope 61. Part 2 of quip: 7 wds.

67. — Maria 68. Actress — Mumford 69. Self-denier 70. Sharp 73. Cream tea item

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SHEPHERD EXPRESS Date: 5/9/19

::FREEWILLASTROLOGY ::BY ROB BREZSNY TAURUS (April 20-May 20): According to science writer Sarah Zielinski in Smithsonian magazine, fireflies produce the most efficient light on planet Earth. Nearly 100 percent of the energy produced by the chemical reaction inside the insect’s body is emitted as a brilliant glow. With that in mind, I propose that you regard the firefly as your spirit creature in the coming weeks. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you, too, will be a dynamic and proficient generator of luminosity. For best results, don’t tone down your brilliance, even if it illuminates shadows people are trying to hide.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Here’s a message from author Susan J. Elliott: “This is not your week to run the Universe. Next week is not looking so good either.” Now here’s a message from me: Elliott’s revelation is very good news! Since you won’t have to worry about trying to manage and finetune the Universe, you can focus all your efforts on your own self-care. And the coming weeks will be a favorable time to do just that. You’re due to dramatically upgrade your understanding of what you need to feel healthy and happy, and then take the appropriate measures to put your new insights into action.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): The next three weeks will be an excellent time to serve as your own visionary prophet and dynamic fortune teller. The predictions and conjectures you make about your future destiny will have an 85 percent likelihood of being accurate. They will also be relatively free of fear and worries. So, I urge you to give your imagination permission to engage in fun fantasies about what’s ahead for you. Be daringly optimistic and exuberantly hopeful and brazenly selfcelebratory.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Leo poet Stanley Kunitz told his students, “You must be very careful not to deprive the poem of its wild origin.” That’s useful advice for anyone who spawns anything, not just poets. There’s something unruly and unpredictable about every creative idea or fresh perspective that rises up in us. Do you remember when you first felt the urge to look for a new job, or move to a new city, or search for a new kind of relationship? Wildness was there at the inception. And you needed to stay in touch with the wildness so as to follow through with practical action. That’s what I encourage you to do now. Reconnect with the wild origins of the important changes you’re nurturing.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I have no complaints about the measures you’ve taken recently to push past unnecessary limits and to break outworn taboos. In fact, I celebrate them.

Keep going! You’ll be better off without those decaying constraints. Soon, you’ll begin using all the energy you have liberated and the spaciousness you have made available. But I do have one concern: I wonder if part of you is worried that you have been too bold and have gone too far. To that part of you I say: No! You haven’t been too bold. You haven’t gone too far.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “Dreamt of a past that frees its prisoners.” So wrote Meena Alexander in her poem “Question Time.” I’d love for you to have that experience in the coming weeks. I’d love for you be released from the karma of your history so that you no longer have to repeat old patterns, or feel weighed down by what happened to you once upon a time. I’d love for you to no longer have to answer to decayed traditions and outmoded commitments and lost causes. I’d love for you to escape the pull of memories that tend to drag you back toward things that can’t be changed and don’t matter anymore.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Desire is a profoundly upsetting force,” writes author Elspeth Probyn. “It may totally rearrange what we think we want. Desire skews plans and sets forth unthought-of possibilities.” In my opinion, Probyn’s statements are half-true. The other half of the truth is that desire can also be a profoundly healing and rejuvenating force, and for the same reasons: It rearranges what we think we want, alters plans and unleashes unthought-of possibilities. How does all this relate to you? From what I can tell, you are now on the cusp of desire’s two overlapping powers. What happens next could be upsetting or healing, disorienting or rejuvenating. If you’d like to emphasize the

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healing and rejuvenating, I suggest you treat desire as a sacred gift and a blessing.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “So much of what we learn about love is taught by people who never really loved us.” My Sagittarian friend Ellen made that sad observation. Is it true for you? Ellen added the following thoughts: So much of what we learn about love is taught by people who were too narcissistic or wounded to be able to love very well; and by people who didn’t have many listening skills and therefore didn’t know enough about us to love us for who we really are; and by people who love themselves poorly and so of course find it hard to love anyone else. Is any of this applicable to what you have experienced, Sagittarius? If so, here’s an antidote that I think you’ll find effective during the next seven weeks: identify the people who have loved you well and the people who might love you well in the future—and then vow to learn all you can from them.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Capricorn fantasy novelist Laini Taylor creates imaginary worlds where heroines use magic and wiles to follow their bliss while wrangling with gods and rascals. In describing her writing process, she says, “Like a magpie, I am a scavenger of shiny things: fairy tales, dead languages, weird folk beliefs, and fascinating religions.” She adds, “I have plundered tidbits of history and lore to build something new, using only the parts that light my mind on fire.” I encourage you to adopt her strategies for your own use in the coming weeks. Be alert for gleaming goodies and tricky delicacies and alluring treats. Use them to create new experiences that thrill your imagination. I believe the coming weeks will be an excellent time to use your magic and wiles to follow your bliss while wrangling with gods and rascals.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “I was always asking for the specific thing that wasn’t mine,” wrote poet Joanne Kyger. “I wanted a haven that wasn’t my own.” If there is any part of you that resonates with that defeatist perspective, Aquarius, now is an excellent time to begin outgrowing or transforming it. I guarantee you that you’ll have the potency you need to retrain yourself; so that you will more and more ask for specific things that can potentially be yours; so that you will more and more want a haven that can be your own.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): I’m not a fan of nagging. I don’t like to be nagged and I scrupulously avoid nagging others. And yet, now I will break my own rules so as to provide you with your most accurate and helpful horoscope. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you aren’t likely to get what you truly need and deserve in the coming days unless you engage in some polite, diplomatic nagging. See what you can do to employ nagging as a graceful, even charming art. For best results, infuse it with humor and playfulness.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Time to shake things up! In the next three weeks, I invite you to try at least three of the following experiments. 1. See unusual sights in familiar situations. 2. Seek out new music that both calms you and excites you. 3. Get an inspiring statue or image of a favorite deity or hero. 4. Ask for a message from the person you will be three years from now. 5. Use your hands and tongue in ways you don’t usually use them.

6. Go in quest of a cathartic release that purges frustration and rouses holy passion. 7. Locate the sweet spot where deep feeling and deep thinking overlap.

Homework: Nietzsche said, “One must have chaos within oneself if one is to be a dancing star.” Are you a dancing star? Comment at freewillastrology.com.

Go to realastrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 877873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

::NEWS OF THE WEIRD ::BY THE EDITORS OF ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

Patron Saint of the Weird

P

olice officers in Indialantic, Fla., responded to at least seven calls about a man disturbing the peace on April 7. Patrons of Starbucks and Sassy Granny’s Smoothies, among others, were startled when 61-year-old Thomas Devaney Lane started yelling, calling himself “the saint” and threatening to unleash an “army of turtles” upon the community. According to WKMG, when Lane was taken by an officer to the police station, he screamed at the dispatcher and pounded on the walls, but then ran out of the building and couldn’t be located.

He was then found at a 7-Eleven, verbally assaulting customers. As officers stood by, Lane called 911 and told the dispatcher, “I need to leave now, or you will all be sorry you fucked with the saint.” The saint has been charged with disturbing the peace, resisting arrest without violence and misusing 911.

tato Commission’s 75th anniversary. It’s been traveling the country ever since, promoting Idaho’s biggest crop, and the plan was for it to be retired this year, when Big Idaho Potato 2.0 arrives. But Kristie Wolfe had better idea. The house builder has converted the sculpture into a single-room hotel (aptly called the Big Idaho Potato Hotel), reported USA Today. It features a queen bed, two chairs and a bathroom with a whirlpool and skylight for stargazing; Wolfe lists it on Airbnb for $200 per night. “It’s a way of inviting people to experience Idaho in a unique way,” remarked Frank Muir, CEO of the Idaho Potato Commission.

That Spa Sucks!

A “vampire facial” is a procedure during which blood is drawn with a needle and then “spun” to separate the plasma, which is then injected into the face. For customers of a spa in Albuquerque, N.M., however, the most lasting effects may come after a blood test. The state’s Department of Health is urging customers of VIP Spa, which closed in September 2018, to undergo HIV testing after two people were infected following treatment there. Dr. Dean Bair of the Bair Medical Spa said people should always make sure they’re going to a licensed facility for such procedures. “This is just the worst example of what can go wrong,” he told KOAT. The spa closed after inspectors found the spa’s practices could potentially spread blood-borne infections, including hepatitis B and C as well as HIV.

Flushed Forebears

For Tater-lovin’ Travelers

A 33-year-old man from Pittsburgh, Penn., was arraigned April 29 on two counts of abuse of a corpse and one count of criminal mischief after he flushed his grandparents’ ashes down the toilet. The Tribune-Review reported that Thomas Wells was living at his mother’s house when she became fed up with his drinking and marijuana use and asked him to leave last September. Denise Porter told police she learned from a relative in February that Wells had disposed of her parents’ remains, which had been stored in a box as part of a memorial in her bedroom, before leaving. Wells denied flushing the ashes, but he later texted his mother that he would flush her remains, too, after she died.

Idahoans embraced the Big Idaho Potato, a 28-foot-long, steel-and-plaster potato constructed in 2012 to mark the Idaho Po-

© 2019 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

Perhaps It Was an Inside Job The Lankenau Medical Center in suburban Philadelphia, Penn., was the site of a breakin on the morning of April 20, but it was the stolen loot that leaves us scratching our heads.

Two men and a woman stuffed several colonoscopes worth $450,000 into three backpacks. The scopes are used to examine colons during colonoscopies. “This is not something that a typical pawn shop might accept,” said Lower Merion Police Det. Sgt. Michael Vice.

“My feeling would be that it was some type of black-market sales.”

M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9 | 41

::ARTFORART’SSAKE

I’m In Your Wallet ::BY ART KUMBALEK

I

’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a? Hey, what with Mother’s Day ’round the corner, I’m reminded it’s time for my sort of annual Art Kumbalek Donordough/Greenback/Pin Money/Cookie Jar/Piggy Bank/Petty Cash/C Note/G Note/Stick ’em Up/Raid the Kid’s College Fund/Back Up the Truck/What’sIn-Your-Wallet Money Grab. And just like any other public radio, television, what-have-you nonprofit, my pitch hasn’t changed over the years and it’s not going to until I get some goddamn results.

Hey, I’m as focking sick of it as you are and I wish I didn’t have to do it, but unless you’s start pledging plenty, I’ll be fiscally forced to cram my pitch down your throat ’til you finally cough it up, what the fock.

And so I ask you to fork it over, and I don’t want to hear any pissin’ and moanin’ about your economy lowwage as an excuse as to why you are unable to focking fork it over, thank you very kindly. Excuses are for losers, but if you flip me some dough at any time during my Feather the Nest Week, we can all come out of this as winners, you betcha.

Yeah, I know. Winner? Greasing the palm of some knob in a newspaper would make you, the reader, a winner? Wouldn’t “wiener” be more accurate? Could be. Some people are just natural-born wieners no matter what they do or don’t do, what the fock. Like this guy I knew who goes to see the doctor. He’s got

42 | M AY 9 , 2 0 1 9

a strawberry jammed up each nostril, a carrot sticking out each ear, and a wiener up his dupa. He says, “Doc, I think there’s something wrong with me.” Doctor says, “Well sir, offhand I’d say you weren’t eating properly.”

Ba-ding!

The future success of this page depends on my ability to convince you readers to pony up and make a special gift. Please take a moment and reflect upon all that you derive from perusing my cram-packed essays week after week (mostly) throughout the year. Reflect

upon how much an improved citizen of our country and native of the planet you become each time I explore the meaning of Truth, Justice and The American Way. Reflect upon how much better an understanding of the world around you and of its cultural grab bag you gain when I present you with informational tidbits I’ve gleaned over the years—such as for vacation, Irish families visit a different bar; and that the reason Disney has not built a park in communist China has nothing to do with politics but has everything to do with the height

requirement to go on the rides. Ba-ding!

Reflect upon all that and more as you contemplate making a financial contribution that will go directly to increasing the comfortability of my lifestyle, which will translate directly to the ease with which I’m able to slap these important essays together for you’s. Ask yourself where else is it you can go but to this half-apage to get acquainted with such a varied load of stuff, get the lowdown on everything from the theory of quantum gravity to the correlation between the population of Monkey Island and the price of a pepperoni pizza at the County Zoo? Yeah, the internet or an oldfashioned library, you might say. But hey, what good is that information if you don’t know what I think about it? Abso-focking-lutely nothing.

People in this age and day of the hectic style of fastpaced life don’t have time to think for themselves. Everybody needs a “God’s messenger,” and I can continue to be yours, with your generous financial support. So right now, how ’bout you whip out an envelope and address it this way: Shepherd Express, 207 E. Buffalo St., Ste. #410, Milwaukee WI, 53202, c/o Art Kumbalek.

Then stuff the envelope with a couple, three Jacksons and maybe a Franklin or two, or perhaps a properly endorsed check made out to Art Kumbalek—and don’t forget to put a stamp on it, nitwit.

One last reminder: I’m way short of the financial goals needed to support these fine essays. If you’ve never contributed to anything before, now’s the time to get your lazy ass in gear and help me stay on the page.

You already know where to send your dough, and listen: I don’t have any practical tote bags or useful coffee mugs to send in return, but I can promise that for the contribution of $50 bucks or more, I’ll find something laying around my dinky apartment I don’t need any more that you can have, ’cause I’m Art Kumbalek and I told you so.

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