Bridal world Spring2014
A special publication of the Ludington Daily News
2 Ludington Daily News/Bridal
Wedding party responsibilities (MS) — As weddings have become less regimented and more expensive, the traditional bridal party is often pared down to a best man and a bridesmaid or two. Their roles, however, have remained constant through the years. Whether the wedding you’ve got in mind is large or small, formal or casual, conventional or original, it’s helpful to have a sense of the roles that bridal party members have played through the years.
Maid of honor Usually the closest friend of the bride and sometimes a relative. A married, divorced, widowed, or older woman might be called the matron of honor. She assists with the details of the wedding plans, like shopping for the bridal gown, addressing invitations and choosing flowers. She arranges the bridal shower in conjunction with the bride’s family, is in charge of coordinating the bridesmaids and organizing fittings, and typically signs the couple’s certificate of marriage or wedding license as a legal witness. At the reception, she should stand immediately after the groom in the receiving line.
Best man
Commonly the groom’s best friend, relative or not, the best man is in charge of instructing the ushers and coordinating the groom’s transportation to the ceremony. He usually holds the rings until the ceremony and will also sign the marriage certificate as a legal witness. At the reception, he holds a place of honor, escorting the maid of honor in the receiving line and in all other wedding party activities. He’s also the toastmaster, offering the first toast to the couple.
ception as well as assist the groom and the best man.
Bridesmaids and ushers
Flower girl and ring bearer
Typically friends or relatives of the bride, bridesmaids may be asked to coordinate special details during the ceremony preparations or at the reception, and assist the bride and the maid of honor. Ushers (sometimes also known as groomsmen) should be prepared for an early arrival at the ceremony to escort female guests to their seats. During the ceremony, they will escort the bridesmaids down the aisle. They may also be asked to coordinate the guests’ trip from the ceremony to the re-
COVER PHOTO: Mercelle LeGalle and Drew Howard are shown after their wedding ceremony on Ludington’s beach. PHOTOGRAPHY BY SUE BROWN INC.
The flower girl carries a basket of flower petals to sprinkle down the aisle, or flowers to be passed out to the women seated near the aisle. The ring bearer may either escort the flower girl down the aisle, or follow her, with the rings on a pillow.
Father of the bride His most conspicuous duty is giving away the bride at the ceremony. He might also fulfill numerous rolls, such as coordinating transportation, dancing and toasting. Traditionally, he and the mother of the bride have paid for the wedding and reception but today it is common for expenses to be shared by both families along with the bride and groom themselves.
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Ludington Daily News/Bridal 3
Wedding insurance expands as nuptials get pricier BY MICHAEL MELIA ASSOCIATED PRESS
HARTFORD, Conn. (AP) — Worried about the groom getting cold feet? There’s an insurance policy for that. With the cost of the average American wedding reaching about $26,000, insurers have been selling a growing number of policies to protect against losses from extreme weather, illness and, in one firm’s case, even a sudden change of heart. Cheryl Winter spent $500 for Hartford-based Travelers Cos. Inc. to cover her daughter’s $50,000 destination wedding last October in New Orleans, where her biggest concern was a potential hurricane. The weather cooperated, but the limousine never showed up. Her daughter took a taxi cab to the church, and they used the insurance policy to claim the deposit money they couldn’t get back from the limo driver. “No one wants to be walking in the French Quarter in a long gown and high heels,” said Winter, who lives in the Houston area. The insurance is offered
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by a small number of U.S. companies. Insurers declined to provide data on the number of customers beyond saying they are growing steadily. It can cover losses from issues ranging from bankrupt wedding halls to cancellations forced by unexpected military deployments. Travelers says issues with vendors account for about a quarter of the claims, with most of those related to issues with photographers or videographers. For parents concerned about a relationship souring before the exchange of
vows, Fireman’s Fund Insurance Co. offers change of heart insurance. It’s been available since 2007, but the program administrator said
the fraud rate soared in the early years as policies were bought for couples who were known to be fighting. That coverage now applies only if the bride or groom calls off the wedding more than nine months beforehand. “Coverage does not exist once you hit the altar,” said administrator Rob Nuccio of R.V. Nuccio & Associates. Kyle Brown, director of the Bakersfield, Calif.-based Bridal Association of America, said he recommends wedding insurance, but he estimates policies are taken out for less than half of 1 percent of the more than 2 million weddings held annually in the U.S. “Nobody likes to think about the bad side,” he said.
4 Ludington Daily News/Bridal
Seating your wedding guests Helpful hints to make the job easier
(MS) — Weddings are filled with many emotions: happiness, excitement and anticipation, to name a few. With all of the positive emotions a wedding may drum up, in the mix there may be a few negative ones, including feelings of being overwhelmed at all the details that need to be completed on a deadline. One aspect of wedding planning that tends to send people into panic is wedding reception seating arrangements. The thought of having 200 friends and family members together under one roof — and then attempting to seat them next to an acceptable group of people — can cause some couples to hyperventilate. Every family has its ups and downs, and there are certain people who get along well and a few who clash. Ensuring that a wedding is memorable for all the right reasons (and not for the brawl at table 3) is why seating arrangements are so important. Many couples can use a little advice when seating guests, while others would love another person to handle the seating arrangements for them. Here are some guidelines for setting up reception seating arrangements. • Place yourselves, as well as the bridal party, at a sep-
Ensuring that a wedding is memorable for all the right reasons (and not for the brawl at table 3) is why seating arrangements are so important. arate table that is in a prime location in the room. Be sure to allow the spouses or dates of bridal party members at the same table so couples remain together. • Some couples choose to seat both sets of parents at one table together — the parents’ table. Grandparents may also be seated at this table, depending on the number of people each table can accommodate. • If children under the age of 7 are invited, they should be seated with their parents. Children between ages 7 and 14 can be seated at a separate kids’ table. • Be mindful of guests with disabilities or mobility issues. Seat them close to the door, bathrooms or food station. • Instead of separating the bride and the groom’s family to separate sides, intermingle the tables to promote conversation. • Consider arranging guests by common interests at each table, seating busi-
ness associates or parents’ friends together. • Take into consideration people who have relationship rifts and try to seat them separately. But don’t stress about this too much because it won’t be possible to accommodate everyone. You’ll have to hope that at your wedding a certain level
of decorum will preside. • It’s not unheard of to let guests seat themselves. This takes the pressure of finding a seat for everyone off of you as a couple and enables you to think about the other tasks at hand. This can take place at a buffet wedding or a smaller affair.
Ludington Daily News/Bridal 5
Tips for wedding gown shopping (MS) — Many brides-to-be look forward to the day when they visit a bridal salon and are able to try on gowns for the first time. There are certain tips that can make the day go much more smoothly and potentially reduce the amount of time it may take to find the perfect gown. • Wear a supportive, well constructed strapless bra or corset in your correct size. If you will be wearing a petticoat, also have the right size available. • Go without face makeup when trying on gowns so they remain clean. • Try to wear your hair similar to the style you have in mind for your wedding. • Note that the size of the wedding gown you will wear is typically one to two sizes larger than your day-to-day
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clothes. Proper measurements can be matched to designers’ size charts. • It’s best to limit the number of people with whom you shop to one or two trusted friends or family members. An entourage can be confusing. • It’s always better to order a slightly larger gown and leave room for alterations if you are between sizes. Almost as long as there have been bridal gowns, white or ivory have been the colors of choice for first-time brides. These light hues represent the purity and innocence of the bride. Although a few brides-to-be choose to forego wedding white for something a bit more flashy — like pink or yellow gowns — a popular trend today is to wear gowns with accents of black or other deep colors to add dimension to the white canvas.
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Make a budget, stick to it
(MS) — There’s no getting around the fact that weddings can be expensive. For many couples, they’re the first of the largest expenses they will make together. It’s quite easy for individuals to go over budget on their wedding day if they do not carefully keep track of what has been spent on all the elements of the big day. Use this budget planner to keep all of the costs associated with the wedding in one easy-to-manage place.
Wedding Items ________________ Budgeted Amount _____________ Amount Spent ________________ Venue and rentals ______________ Food and service _______________ Beverages ___________________ Cake ______________________ Miscellaneous fees ______________ Gown and alterations ____________ Headpiece and veil ______________ Accessories __________________ Makeup and Hair _______________ Groom’s tux or suit ______________ Groom’s accessories _____________ Floral arrangements _____________ Bouquets ___________________ Ring pillow __________________ Boutonnieres _________________
Corsages ___________________ Reception decorations ___________ Lighting ___________________ Ceremony musicians ____________ Reception musicians ____________ Photography _________________ Videography _________________ Transportation ________________ Favors _____________________ Ceremony fees ________________ Invitations ___________________ Stationery ___________________ Wedding rings ________________ Honeymoon _________________ Other expenses _______________ ________________________ ________________________ ________________________
Ludington Daily News/Bridal 7
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Unique reception touches to set your wedding apart (MS) — Over the course of their lifetimes, many people will be wedding guests on several occasions. During the height of wedding season, weddings can run into one another, as the format and the festivities are similar at various ceremonies. Couples interested in setting their nuptials apart may want to enhance the wedding reception with a few unique ideas. Here are several ideas you can introduce into your wedding to add something special to the reception. • Skip the big entrance. Those who were kind enough to attend the ceremony have already been introduced
to the newly minted happy couple. Instead of spending the cocktail hour in the isolation of the wedding suite, mingle with your guests from start to finish. So much time is spent posing for pictures or being out of touch with guests, the cocktail hour can be a great time to sit and chat. Being with guests during the cocktail hour means you don’t have to make that big entrance from behind closed doors. Guests will have all eyes on you when you step on the dance floor for your first dance together. SEE UNIQUE RECEPTION TOUCHES, PAGE 9
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• Dance to an upbeat number. Guests are expecting a slow, sappy tune. What they may not expect is an upbeat song that shows you are willing to have a little fun. • Encourage couples to dance together. It’s often customary for the bridal party to join the bride and groom on the dance floor midway through the first dance. However, that leaves spouses or significant others waiting in the wings while their dates tango with groomsmen or bridesmaids. Instead, don’t have assigned partners. Rather, encourage your bridal party members to dance with whomever they choose. • Swap the garter/bouquet toss for something more meaningful. If you’re part of a couple who feels the garter and bouquet toss has become trite, there are other ways to create special moments in your celebration. Use this time to present a small gift or token of your affection to someone on the guest list who has served as a mentor or source of inspiration. • Choose one special component as an extra goodie for guests. Some couples feel the more they offer the better guests will view their wedding. Spending more money doesn’t necessarily mean guests will have a better time. If you want to go above and beyond the ordinary, find one thing that you absolutely love and offer that at the party. It could be a chocolate or candy bar, a carving station with your all-time favorite food (even if that’s PB&J), or photo booth. • Hire a live performer. Although it’s hard to beat the performance quality of your wedding song being performed by the original artist, unless you’re cousins with Celine Dion, chances are she
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Choosing what to wear for the big day As mother of the bride or groom (MS) — Whether you’re the mother of the bride or the groom, it goes without saying that you want to look your best on your child’s wedding day. While tradition offers guidelines for choosing appropriate wedding attire for mothers of brides and grooms, choices abound.
Follow the leaders The most important rule of thumb for mothers is to follow the couple’s cues about the style and tone of their nuptials. Before purchasing an en-
semble for the big day, talk with the bride and groom about their vision for the wedding. It’s also a good idea for mothers to postpone purchasing their own wedding attire until the bride has selected her wedding dress and those of her attendants. It may also be useful to know if the couple has selected a color scheme for their wedding.
Don’t be a matchmaker Mothers’ dresses should complement the attire of the wedding party, but do not have to match the bridesmaids, the wedding colors or each other. In fact, the only color that is off limits is white, which is reserved for the bride. In general, moth-
er-of-the-bride and -groom dresses tend to be solid colors rather than intricate prints, which can be distracting and look out of place in photos.
Timing is everything Traditionally, the mother of the bride selects her dress first, and the mother of the groom then chooses something similar in style. If either mother has questions about their choice of wedding attire, they should consult the bride. Clear communication between the mothers or between each mother and the bride will not only make shopping both pleasant and productive, but will ensure that one mother doesn’t
“outdo” or overshadow the other.
Know your style, your place When looking for that perfect dress, whether it’s a floor-length gown or a flowing cocktail dress, stick with styles that flatter your figure and enhance your best features. Since wedding photos will be viewed for many years to come, choose a style that photographs well and a color that works well with your skin tone. Also, keep in mind that while you will be one of the leading ladies at the wedding, your attire should never compete with or draw attention away from the person with the starring role in the production, the bride.
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Favors for wedding guests get personal, creative BY LISA A. FLAM ASSOCIATED PRESS Jillian Mackey had seen wedding favors that seemed like an afterthought, and she knew she did not want to give one of those — an impractical trinket that would likely get tossed in the trash or thrown in a drawer. So during her year-long engagement to Jason Simms, the couple picked blackberries, strawberries and rhubarb in Oregon, where they lived;
gathered cactus pears in New Mexico, where he grew up; and plucked blueberries and apricots when they relocated to her home state, Connecticut. By the time they married on Aug. 2 in New Haven, Conn., the bride, who learned to make jam as a girl, had turned their bounty into dozens of jars of jam for their 135 wedding guests. The idea was to create a favor that was personalized and different, “something I could SEE WEDDING FAVORS, PAGE 13
Ludington Daily News/Bridal 13
WEDDING FAVORS: More personalization going into choices FROM PAGE 12
really feel came from us as a couple, that we had actually put time and effort into,” Jillian Simms said. The wedding favor — that little thank-you-for-coming gift — has risen to new heights. “It’s not just Jordan almonds and chocolate truffles anymore,” said Jennifer Condon, wedding style and registry director for Brides magazine. With so many choices, made even more numerous with personalization and online inspiration, favors have become more specific to the couple, their wedding theme or the venue. Great favors nowadays
include food and photos — things that guests can enjoy immediately and that aren’t “going to clutter their house,” said Frugoli, who also co-owns a sweets company. When the party is over, guests can find bags and containers to fill with decorated cookies, candy from a colorful buffet, popcorn in fun flavors or the fixings for s’mores. “It goes back to a nostalgia thing,” said Frugoli. “People are looking for a lot of comfort food and fun things.” Baked goods — cake pops, pie pops and cupcakes — can be decorated to fit a theme or color scheme.
Foodie couples may give a gourmet gift, such as an herb-infused salt or a small bottle of wine, or vinegar or olive oil in a distinctive flavor. Instant gratification also comes by way of the photo favor, a strip of pictures from a photo booth, an instant photo that gets popped into a frame. The bridal couple often gets a copy of the images too. “They get to see everybody, like Grandma in a moustache and glasses,” said Frugoli. A favor can also do double duty. “Instead of one large centerpiece, a bride will do eight tiny little vases that create a centerpiece togeth-
er, and each person takes one home as a favor,” Condon said. Or there might be picture frames holding the table numbers. Couples have grown “braver,” more willing to give what feels right to them. Those with an outdoor ceremony might give fleece blankets; others might hand out hangover kits with mints and pain reliever. Or they can customize a drink cozy or tin of tea. “The result is phenomenal,” Frugoli said. “They feel happy giving those things out because it has a purpose. The guests are happy because they are getting something fun, cool and unique.”
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What not to serve at a wedding
Wedding cake trends to consider (MS) — The multi-tiered cake that is a favorite wedding tradition is often presented at the end of the night. The happy couple takes a slice and enjoys the first piece. In recent years, wedding cakes have become more of an artistic centerpiece than just a confectionary treat. Although many catering halls or reception sites will include the wedding cake in a package deal, many couples choose to order their cake elsewhere. If television trends are any indication, many people are opting to spend more money on a customized wedding cake. These fondant and buttercream creations may be elaborate in nature, so much so they’ll likely need to be or-
dered several months in advance. Couples looking for something a bit different for their upcoming nuptials, may want to consider these trends in wedding cakes. • 3-D accents on the cake, such as graphic appliques. • A black-and-white motif that gives the cake a simplistic, yet trendy appeal. • A lot of bold color in the cake, instead of just white or ivory. • Dramatic monograms that can add class to the cake. • Cakes that mirror the style of the wedding gown, including fondant ruffles and appliques. Many couples still opt for the traditional, and that is always in style.
(MS) — Couples often fret over what to serve their guests at the reception, and rightfully so. Here are some ideas of what not to serve: • Exotic cuisine - You may be a risk taker when it comes to cuisine, but others may not. • Anything on fire - Why risk an accident for a spectacle? • Raw food - Clams on the halfshell or sushigrade tuna may seem like good ideas, but keep in mind that it is hard to ensure quality when feeding 200 people at the same time. • Anything too elaborate - The faster servers can get food out to guests the better. • Fast food - This is your
wedding, and you want the food to fit with the scale of the day. A formal wedding generally includes a formal meal. Although it may be alright to include some fast food inspired dishes at the cocktail buffet, steer clear of burgers and fries for the main meal. • Themed food - Don’t dye that baked potato purple because you want the wedding to be a plum-colored affair. • No food at all - Whether your wedding is small or grand in scale, guests will expect some sort of food. Be sure to have some hors d’oeuvres or some wellplaced pickings for guests to grab while mingling. After all, they will need something to provide energy to mingle and dance.
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Being a good wedding guest BY LISA A. FLAM ASSOCIATED PRESS
(AP) — Of Tiffany Schutt’s 250 wedding guests, one surely stood out. Not only was she not invited, but the young guest, a relative with whom the couple wasn’t particularly close, turned up in a white dress — and a short and sexy one at that. In fact, she was one of five uninvited relatives whose names were added to invited guests’ response cards. Schutt, who married in Indianapolis, was flattered but also in disbelief that they so badly wanted to attend. “We are very laid-back, thankfully, so that day I took it in stride,” she said. “It just seemed not to be the best etiquette.” When it comes to manners, experts say wedding guests do well overall but are still causing headaches on a few fronts. “The No. 1 thing that I hear about from frustrated brides is guests not RSVPing, not RSVPing on time or RSVPing for more than one person,” said Anna Post, great-greatgranddaughter of Emily Post and co-author of the upcoming new edition of “Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette” (William Morrow). “It’s all about the RSVP.” Blame it on the relaxed culture, busy lives or the hope of a better Saturday night offer, but some people just can’t get it together to mail the response card back. And don’t get brides started on the guests who say they will attend, only to end up as noshows.
“People have gotten casual about this,” Post says. “When it comes to the wedding they think, it’s not a big deal. I’m just one person, it’ll be fine. And it’s really not. It’s a lot of money and a lot of stress for the couple.” New York wedding planner Marcy Blum suggests adding an enclosure with the invitation listing an email address people can use to RSVP or ask questions. Brides put thought into addressing their invitations, which spell out exactly who is invited. When guests treat the RSVP card like a write-in ballot, a phone call is in order, Post said, so they understand that their date or child was not invited. Besides RSVPs, another etiquette trouble spot is smartphones — in particular, those guests who crowd the aisle to take pictures and then post the images online before the ceremony is even over, scooping the couple’s wedding photographer. “A bride is very particular about how she looks at her wedding, and she does not want the photo that isn’t the most possible flattering photo to be all over Facebook before she gets to look at her wedding shots,” Blum said. Photos aside, phones detract from the solemnity of the ceremony. “If you’re so busy tweeting and Instagraming, you’re not paying attention,” Blum said. Keeping guests from snapping away at the reception, though, may be a losing fight, Post says, though couples can ask guests to refrain from posting the photos online.
“I would pick and choose your battles,” she said. “The ceremony is the right place to focus.” Other do’s and don’ts for guests:
Dress Don’t be too informal, but avoid wearing anything that’s too sexy, too over-thetop or too white. Blum notes a resurgence of women wearing white to weddings, and says brides don’t appreciate that on their big day in white.
Gifts
Some regional traditions may call for bringing the gift to the wedding, but experts say that in general they are best sent ahead of time.
Behavior Arrive early, and stay to dance, mingle and converse at dinner. “Being social and engaged is one of the best ways to be a good guest, along with not getting too drunk, or drunk period,” Post says.
Toasts Toasts to the couples can get out of hand if guests, sometimes tipsy ones, start asking for the microphone. Guests should not speak unless they are asked or receive permission. Blum says guests do seem better behaved at weddings today, as couples create their guest lists with great care.
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Wedding themes can add extra fun (MS) — Every couple wants their wedding to be memorable. The goal of planning a wedding is to create an experience that everyone will remember for years to come. For some couples, a theme wedding is the best way to accomplish just that. When it comes time to select a theme, the day the wedding takes place may dictate the theme. For example, if the wedding takes place on Halloween, the ideas for the theme are easy. Many other couples choose a theme that highlights a specific interest. Here is a look at some themes: • Holiday - The Christmas season lends itself well to
wedding planning. The colors (red, green, gold) are already established, and most churches and buildings are already decked out in holiday finery, cutting down on decorations. • Vegas - Couples who want to tie the knot in Las Vegas but want to ensure their loved ones can attend can recreate the magic of Vegas wherever they may be. Casino-inspired games and big
buffet meals make guests feel like they have stepped into a casino on the famed Vegas strip. • Fairytale - Many men and women envision a fairytale wedding complete with horse-drawn carriage and the “happily ever after.” This is what makes Disney properties as well as the various castles around the world popular backdrops for wedding events. Those planning
a fairytale wedding need only look to favorite stories or movies for their inspiration. • Interest or passion - Love to climb mountains? Avid about scuba diving? Couples who share a particular interest can include elements of this sport or hobby into their wedding. Invitations and decor can hint at the theme, and then special activities can further enhance it. Fish bowls as centerpieces may call to mind underwater adventures, while surfboard-shaped invites may set the scene for a beachside party. Theme weddings can add an extra spice to the festivities — making it even more special.
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