A LETTER TO MY MOM IN HEAVEN

Hi Mommy A.K.A “SALLY”,

First off, I just want to tell you how much I miss you and how hard it’s been every single day since God called you home. I miss you so much it hurts. I miss our talks, I miss seeing your Face, hearing your voice and that infectious smile.

Most of the time I feel like this is all just a bad nightmare that I can’t wake up from and that when I do wake up, you’ll be there telling me how silly this all sounds. I keep thinking that you’re on a vacation without me and you’ll be home any day now. I still look for you in the room; I still pick up the phone three times a day to call you. I still wake up waiting to hear you say “Jannie what we eating for breakfast”.

Days have become hard, because I don’t have my sidekick anymore. Nights are harder, because I won’t have you saying “Jannie call when you coming home”. Seeing you waiting up for me every night was irreplaceable. Why did you have to go Mommy? I live with the comfort of knowing you and I had the perfect mother/daughter relationship. I feel like I’ve been robbed in life, if that makes sense, Robbed of all the things that you should be present for.

I still need your support, your encouraging words, and I need your guidance. It hurts my heart to know that if I ever get married, you won’t be there. To know my children will never meet you.

Mommy I hope that I can make you proud of me still. You took all of me with you when you left. Even though I know I’ll see you again someday, that doesn’t ease the pain I feel daily. I hope that heaven is beautiful; that it’s everything you ever imagined it would be. I hope you sitting down playing catch up with Grammy and Granddais.

I am going to miss you every single day for the rest of my life. I’ll love you until I take my final breath. I will never forget your daily words to me “Jannie never forget God”. I’ll love you Always.

Love, Your Oldest Pain Jan-Marie