The Siren - Allyship Issue

THE

ALLYSHIP

ISSUE

THE SIREN

THE FEMINIST MAGAZINE OF THE UNIVERSITY OF OREGON

Letter from the Editor Dominant identities have power. The type of power that makes people pay attention, listen and change or at least do better. Allyship calls on dominant identities to take responsiblity for educating themselves on privilege, and recognize how experiences and identities impact the way we navigate through life.

What if we held privilege responsible for the power that it has?

In this issue there are stories of why allies are needed. There are expressions of how to be an ally. There are celebrations of feeling empowered by identity. My intentions behind The Allyship Issue are to awaken awareness

and stir dialog about how to be a better ally.

The works in this issue represent the opinions of the contributor. Everyone is at a different place in their allyship development. These pieces were chosen because they represent a step in the right direction towards learning about allyship. I ask that you be gracious about the knowledge and opinions that are shared in this piece.

An awareness of nuanced and indepth forms of feminism is a privilege to learn. I encourage critiquing that is empowering, educational and gracious because allyship means being in a constant state of learning and growing.

Who made this possible

- Kimberly Harris

Director of the Women’s Center Fatima Roohi Pervaiz Editorial Staff Anette Rodriguez Kiana Nadonza Contributors Victoria Ginzburg Mecca Donovan Lyla Masterson Kiana Nadonza Kaylie Smith Michiro Ando Jaelynn Harris

Forest Rolnick-Wihtol Thomas Kelson Aqsa Khan Caroline Dranow Drea Secchi Kiva Hanson Karyn Schultz

Francesca Smith Wendy Palafox-Arceo Kathleen Perez Anette Rodriguez Janeth Alonso Gabby J.

contents The S.S Allyship

I Said I Wanted Love

Abuse

Hidden Hate

Allyship for All Ages Becoming an Ally for Women’s Rights Quote from April Reign Seeking and Recieving Support at the University of Oregon We Will Not Be Erased Womxn of Color Symposium Allyship Symposium My Personal Bill of Rights

Look How Beautiful Diversity Can Be Allyship is the New Leadership Sexual Assualt Survivor Allyship Education is Allyship Women Supporting Women Means Trans Women, Women of Color and LGBTQ+ Women too Coloring Pages

The S.S. Allyship Words by Lyla Masterson Artwork by Caroline Dranow

Come aboard to sail the seas.

Meet new people and have new discoveries of the world, of self and of others.

Aboard the S.S Allyship there are very few qualifications.

Those upon this journey, the allies, lay the foundations for a world of understanding, change and acceptance.

Allies are those who walk hand in hand to march for our rights; those who support you to shine your lights and join your fight against the injustices that you may be facing.

Allies can be any age, any gender, any sexuality, any race, a close friend, a stranger, a relative, any human that is willing to replace the repressive forces in existence to that of love and hope.

The S.S. Allyship desires to float over the sea of oppression; the rocky waters riddled with pain and depression, to reestablish a world of equality for everyone and anyone.

Be an ally, a supporter and step onto the transporter to a better, kinder future.

Abuse.

CONTENT WARNING: describes an experience of sexual assault that could be triggering or uncomfortable to read.

Words and artwork by Aqsa Khan

I am a 23 year old woman, living in Islamabad, and today I faced a difficult situation which came as a shock to me that in the country’s capital which is rather safe for women.

This incident can occur without any consequences, I wonder what happens in the underdeveloped parts of the country.

It was an average Saturday.

I had come from a workshop with my fiancé and we decided to meet up with my sister at an elite café in the most posh sector of the city.

We had tea and everything was as per usual. It was a good day coming to an end.

We bid farewell and my fiancé left for a meeting, while my sister and I were waiting for my car to arrive. I noticed that my fiancé had forgotten his package and I called him to remind him about his package. He said that he

was on his way back and I should come downstairs to the market from the double story café to hand him his package as he was getting late. I went downstairs and I was waiting for him while looking around to see him and suddenly when I looked straight there was a guy in a white car, with the lights turned on and he was looking at me with his penis out of his pants and in his hands.

For a moment I thought I was hallucinating, how can it be that in Islamabad’s most elite market a man was doing this? When I focused I realized that he had stuck out his tongue along with his penis and he was masturbating to the simple sight of me. For those concerned, I was wearing a Shalwar Kameez, and it was not dark yet and this incident happened around 6 pm.

Naturally being a girl from a protected, well-reputed family I got scared and went back to the café, told my sister about what had happened and called my fiancé back to the café. I

was scared and shocked that how can a person do this in public. Has he no shame or remorse? What about his family, doesn’t he fear that doing these things he can no longer face someone he loves?

Do these people even love? How do they live with themselves? I was so stressed out on my way back and I felt so impure that the first thing I did was took a shower when I came home to wash away his dirty looks off my body.

Asqa in Shalwar Kameez.

I could have let this incident pass away and not written an article about it but this is in hope that the men reading this should keep in mind that how much a single act of power and control can affect the other person. This is the reason why Pakistani parents are so hesitant to send their girls away for studies or work, this is the reason why many girls don’t continue their studies, this is the reason why rape is so common and why

women feel so unprotected even in the 21st century because for some people, women are just an sexual object which they can use whenever they want even in public places.

I would urge the men of Pakistan to take these incidents of assault seriously, rather than to sweep them under the carpet, saying that it was nothing. Women should not be scared to exist. We should be united and together to end this abuse against us.

Allyship of All Ages

Children, ages 13 to 17, were asked to draw something that represents how America is important to them and why they deserve allies.

Becoming an Ally for Women’s Rights Words by Thomas Kelson Artwork by Jaelynn Harris

It was many, many years ago when my father more-or-less told me... that about half of the human population are called “women” because they’re wives of men. These women, he said, were equally important to men, but not equal to men.

“Is Mama a woman?” I asked.

“Yes, she is, son,” my father said, sneezing through his mustache.

“But she’s so much more intelligent than you,” I said, “and knows how to do so much more.”

“Even so,” my father said.

“I’m the head of this house.”

“But you’re never at the house,” I said. “You’re

always working.”

At school, an old man teaching history said we should know about George Washington, George III, George Bush and a bunch of other men.

“Teacher?” I asked, “Where are the women in history?”

“I dunno,” the teacher replied. “I guess they just didn’t do anything interesting or important.”

I opened up a page in the textbook with Susan B. Anthony, Sojourner Truth, Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz and many other women who made the world a better place.

“Who are these women?” I

Susan B. Anthony

asked. “Why can’t we read about them?”

Later on, I was talking to my mother.

“Mama” I said, “is it true that men are supposed to be the bosses of women? Are women really not important at all?”

“No” my mother said. “Some men just blindly believe that women are somehow lesser than they are. I’m not sure where the belief comes, but, rest assured, that in reality, women and men are naturally and inherently equal.”

“That makes sense,” I said.

Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz

Sojourner Truth

"ALLYSHIP IS PASSIVE.

An ally recognizes oppression and sympathizes.

ADVOCACY IS ACTIVE. An advocate uses their privilege to stand in the gap of marginalized people.�

-APRIL REIGN @reignofapril

Artwork by Jaelynn Harris

Seeking and Receiving Support at the University of Oregon: Do You Have What You Need to Take Care of Yourself?

Motivated by the lack of training or discussion on these issues, the Graduate Teaching Fellows Federation caucuses have taken it into their own hands to receive training on these important issues.

Words by Kiana Nadonza

How do we support each other and what does it mean to foster true allyship? These are the questions explored in a series of training events organized by the Graduate Teaching Fellows Federation (GTFF) and co-sponsored by the Survivor Support, Asian and Pacific Islander, Disability Access, Queer and Workers caucuses.

Graduate employees (GEs) wish to learn how to become better allies to each other, their students and the Eugene community.

During Crisis Response training, Drew Terhune, Coordinator of the University of Oregon’s Crisis Intervention and Sexual Violence Support Services, in the office of the Dean of Studens, taught GEs about their services and quick tips

on how to help in crisis.

Their office has drop-in support for undergraduate and graduate students to stop by to receive help from licensed clinicians who have received Oregon’s official State Advocate training.

Services include both trauma-informed care and support for mental health concerns, which means that their office can provide a safe space of support concerning everything from gender-based violence to general concerns.

Whether you need someone to be with you in the courtroom or you need help navigating the realities of adulting (like how to communicate with your instructors or pay a bill), Crisis Intervention and

Sexual Violence Support Services welcomes you.

If you think you could use their help but aren’t sure yet, you can call to receive consultation from a confidential employee who will provide confidential resources.

CRISIS INTERVENTION AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE SUPPORT SERVICES 164 Oregon Hall Drop-In Visits Welcome 24-hour crisis line: 541-346-7233 Office line: 541-346-8194

HOW TO HELP A FRIEND IN CRISIS Crisis is a term that is used to encompass any stress or concerns as defined by the person in crisis. Please remember that you are an ally, and not a trained professional. If your friend’s situation is urgent, please call emergency services ASAP. The following are some tips from the crisis response training to help a friend in a non-emergency situation:

Identify your friend’s needs: Are they telling you this information because they need someone to vent to, or do they want your advice/help locating resources? Ask your friend, prior to assuming their needs.

Come from a place of empathy and validation: You may never be able to say the “perfect” thing, but what is important is that you are prioritizing your friend’s feelings through validation. Validation can be given through many ways, including: a. Acknowledgement of their negative problems (rather than being dismissive and/or trying to sugarcoat their situation) b. Observation of their feelings and then reflecting them to show that you are listening c. Encouragement to seek help if they need it – no matter how “big” or “small” they feel their problems are.

Give yourself time to respond if you need it: Though your friend needs your help, it could be more important that you reflect on what you say before you say it.

Correct yourself if you made a mistake: If you say something that might have come out differently than intended, give yourself the space to correct it. Tell your friend you want to “edit” or “reframe” what you said so that it better reflects what you meant.

Take a step back before self-disclosure: Disclosing your own struggles can be helpful, but it can also be stressful on your own mental health and does not always help your friend whose experiences are still different from yours. Prior to disclosing your own history, consider the context of the situation and whether your self-disclosure is what your friend needs. If disclosing your own problems feels like it could help, just make sure the focus of your disclosure is still always centered on your friend and their concerns.

Urgency is more likely to need emergency services: If the situation is very urgent, such as disclosure of suicidal thoughts or harm to oneself or others, you should refer them to a professional immediately. Depending on the situation, consider calling 911 or CAHOOTS (Crisis Assistance Helping Out on the Streets) at 541-682-5111.

Reporting a Concern: If you or someone you know is facing a non-emergency issue, you should consider filing an online report through the Office of the Dean of Students. For more information, visit: https://dos.uoregon.edu/concern.

If you are unsure about reporting your concern, you are welcome to contact Crisis Intervention and Sexual Violence Support Services directly to confidentially discuss the situation to help decide what your options.

Words like concern and crisis can mean so many things to different people. Support is situational, and sometimes simply asking, “Do you have what you need to take care of yourself?� is powerful enough.

Being an ally means meeting people where they are.

Maybe their problems do not seem as large to you as they are conveying, or perhaps they seem to need more help than they are letting on. No matter what, their feelings are valid, and you should take a step back to remember that there is a reason they are being vulnerable with you.

How you choose to navigate your allyship is up to you but considering the services available and quick tips is a starting point to building a safe space for everyone.

Artwork by Caroline Dranow

We Will Not Be Erased Photography and words by Drea Secchi

If your feminism isn’t intersectional

what’s the point?

WOMXN OF COLOR SYMPOSIUM A restorative and healing event open to all students who identify as Womxn or Non-Binary People of Color.

Photography by Anette Rodriguez Words by Women’s Center Staff

Janeth Alonso I was able to talk about my personal experiences in a safe place with womxn who identify as me. We talked about selfcare, we reflected on ourselves and had a great time.

We talked about being ourselves, and how our personal experiences influences us in the long run and how we can use these experiences to prevent events or become a stronger person. This event was very beneficial for me because I felt very welcome and safe. I was able to network with other beautiful Womxn of Color and make connections. I learned that I’m worth a lot and it’s okay to say no or to

take time off for yourself.

I’m glad that I showed up because I was able to appreciate myself even more because I know I’m working hard to accomplish great things in life. Everyone showed support and made me feel very safe and motivated to continue striving for success.

Anette Rodriguez The Womxn of Color Symposium is a healing 7-hour day, where a safe space is created in order to heal. This year we had activities such as yoga, meditation, and terrarium making and shared intimate stories that related to our identity as Womxn of Color. Overall, we did a lot of laughing and we even shared a few tears. It was a day filled with healing and mixed emotions. It felt very liberating and empowering. Not only were these

activities fun, but there’s time for self-reflection and thinking along with the support of others to signify that you’re not alone. This year, like many in the past, we had a great turnout and participation, even students from OSU came and joined us! The community that was built in those 7 hours was amazing, we went from not knowing one another to sharing and being vulnerable.

The Womxn of Color Symposium is definitely an event everyone should experience. I work for the Women’s Center, and I went to the WOC Symposium for more than the reason of working with the Women’s Center. This was my first time attending because little freshman me was scared of everything, so I didn’t know about events like these. Experiencing the healing through the activities that we did like Yoga and meditation was so amazing. That day I was able to zone out of my daily routine and take time for myself and reflect was something I didn’t

know I needed. I loved the terrarium making that we did and the new friends that I made along the way.

During the WOC Symposium I was also taking pictures so I feel that I got a bit of a different view of the event.

As I took pictures I got to admire how strangers laughed together as if they had known each other for years and the little family that we built in such a short time. I thought I hadn’t really experienced the symposium the most as I was taking pictures, but reflecting on it more, I saw what many didn’t – Womxn supporting and building each other up.

Wendy Palafox-Arceo We talked about how we intersect within our identity, but we also shared about what makes us unique. We did an activity where we wrote down three words that describe us.

Then we went around and shared the three words and why. There were a lot of similarities and differences but we were able to come together and empower one

another. It felt good to say “I am a bad bitch� out loud and have it validated by other powerful individuals.

My biggest takeaway from this event is definitely the empowerment I felt afterwards and just knowing that my struggles are not alone. I even learned how to make and take care of a terrarium! I would say that this event is important because it allows one to come together with others who share a big identity aspect and hopefully heal and grow together.

Kathleen Perez At the Womxn of Color Symposium, I spoke about my experience of being in the foster care system and having a white family.

When I am with my family, I always feel like I do not belong because while they are tall, have blue eyes and blonde hair. I am short, have dark brown eyes and dark brown hair. In public, I always feel out of place with them considering we look nothing alike. I see the way others stare and

talk when I am with them. I had always felt alone in my experiences as a womxn of color who has dealt with the complications of having a different race family. At the symposium, I learned that I was not.

Many others shared their stories of how they have had to endure the feelings of not belonging because of their white parents. The symposium allowed me to connect with other womxn who have endured similar experiences as I due to our chosen families. Due to the symposium, I can walk this earth knowing that I am not alone in my struggles of being womxn of color with a non-traditional family.

ALLYSHIP SYMPOSIUM A restorative and healing event open to all students who do not identify as Womxn or Non-Binary People of Color to learn how to best support and be Allies to Womxn of Color.

Lesson plan by Karyn Schultz

1. Consider your position and how it benefits you Recognizing white privilege means that your skin tone isn’t one of the things that makes your life harder.

Other privileges are socioeconomiminc status, male, heterosexuality, cis-gendered, christian and able-bodied.

2. Do your homework Educate yourself on the ways that white privilege has historically benefited from the oppression of People of Color. Recognize that systemic racism exists at every level of society.

3. Consider the difference between guilt and action Check-in with yourself if you’re feeling defensive when being called out. Be more than “not racist” but actively anti-racist.

4. It’s okay to be uncomfortable Normalize discussions on race and whiteness.

Why are there not more conversations around being White? Confront racial injustices even when it’s uncomfortable.

5. Be teachable Apologize for being called out and move on. Seek spaces and resources to learn about other cultures and identities. It’s okay to make mistakes, but take responsibility to know better next time.

6. Don’t expect a pat on the back Allyship is a life-long journey that has no end.

Dominant identities must continuously take opportunities to be an ally. Do not expect a thank you for being decent and respectful.

Artwork by Kiva Hanson

Write in your own Personal Bill of Rights to express what you want and deserve as a human being.

I SAID I WAN Words by Forest Rolnick-Wihtol

I said I wanted love and thunderstorms opened on the street the lightning tried to send us running but I said I wanted love and you cracked open the sky I said I wanted you and you became the ocean I said I wanted love I said I wanted no more war no more sadness I said I wanted food in the field like a work song and we sang I said I wanted no more prison bars and we sang I said I wanted no more kings let all the tables round out let all the crowns melt down let us become our own saviors

NTED LOVE and we sang I said I wanted no more genocide no more unnamed bodies in the chasms no more highways turned burial grounds no more desaparecidos what did any of them die for if they did not die for this. and we sang my homeland opens into oblivion I become my own homeland I become my own GD I grant myself clemency I give myself a Hebrew name and we sang and we sang and I said I wanted love and we danced out in the street under that raging blue moon

and I said I wanted no more hunger I said I wanted no more walls no more borders I said I wanted doors wide open you as my family you at my table I said I wanted love and you saw right through my body I said I wanted love and we banished all that shame I said I wanted no more lonely no more sweat falling on the desolate ground I wanted to earth to bloom from my body and for once nobody laughed and you said you loved me. you said you loved me and I think that’s so brave love even after everything.

Artwork by Caroline Dranow

Hidden Hate: What They Don’t Include in the College Brochures Words by Victoria Ginzburg

“What’s your number?” He said jokingly. I was slightly confused, as this question is not unheard-of at a typical college party, but I had never met him before let alone talked to him.

Yet he approached me and asked me for my number?

He repeated himself “what’s your number?” but this time, he pulled out his arm and pointed to the inside of his wrist. I then understood that his evil was not in objectifying me as a woman but as a Jew. I have always stood proud of my identity as a Jewish woman. Living amongst a loving Jewish community in the Bay Area during the formative years of my childhood created a sense of security and warmth that I always carried with me. I felt understood. There was

no need for me to explain who I was to those around me. I, of course, was not naive to the realities of anti-semitism but also had never experienced it first hand.

In October of this past year, I was confronted with blatant hatred that I had never fathomed experiencing before. I was verbally attacked for being Jewish. It was unprovoked and occurred in only an instant - a short few sentences, but its impact continued to linger over me for many months after.

This person who came up to me decided to take something I cherish so deeply, something I feel so proud of, and place upon my identity shame and disgust. His words brought a new and unparalleled

pain into my being. Soon after this incident, I began to feel so alone. It was hard for me to explain to people why this attack of my identity hurt so much, why it was impacting me in such a heavy way. I longed for the familiar security of the Jewish community that had sheltered me for so many years. I began to feel isolated from the ones around me, from my surrounding settings. I retreated.

This remark was hurtful because it took a personally sensitive topic and perverted it into a joke.

It dismissed the gravity and horrors that had occurred in the Holocaust. I found myself in constant shock and in tears by the idea that someone had thought that turning the death of

my family into a joke was an okay thing to do. That it was funny and that I would laugh along too. The Holocaust is something I think about almost every day whether intentionally or not. The reason I am alive is because of a few select relatives from my family survived while the rest of my family perished.

This is not an occurrence I take lightly.

I had never been faced with hatred before nor did I think when choosing the University of Oregon that this would be a reality for me or my friends.

People often attribute the American college experiences to be the best years of one’s life. This utopian dream created by pop culture and the media is not

necessarily all true. The school’s support of its diverse community is well advertised and buildings continue to be adorned with “all are welcome here signs.” Yet, in reality, many people lack the education and awareness needed for a truly accepting community to be fulfilled.

The lack of inherent radical acceptance and understanding among all students is why we must aspire to be better.

My experience of being harassed on the basis of my religion is something I think about often as I encounter a diverse range of people in my life. It opened my eyes to the tenderness of identity, especially in an environment in which one might feel uncomfortable or misunderstood. As students here at the University of Oregon, we were selected to make up a special community to both personally grow and collectively enrich each others’ experiences. In this community, each person holds a unique identity

and cherishes specific parts of who they are. An unsolicited attack on these sacred parts of oneself can be so damaging. Hate is so counterproductive for this community. It should not be tolerated no matter the influence one is under, the person they are addressing or the audience they are a part of.

When someone overhears a derogatory, homophobic, racist, sexist or anti-semitic comment they are given the choice to be an ally or to be a bystander. Choosing to be an ally is choosing to hold those accountable for their words and actions no matter who someone is targeting.

An ally chooses to create a more inclusive and safe space by calling out inappropriate and hurtful comments or actions. I have learned through my personal experience that the difference between an ally and a bystander can be monumental in one’s own personal experience. It is the difference between making someone feel accepted and safe versus alone and targeted.

Artwork by Caroline Dranow

Artwork by the Allyship of All Ages Childern

Allyship is the New Leadership Contribution by Mecca Donovan

https://tinyurl.com/EffectiveAllyship Ashlee Marie Preston says that when we talk over people, ignore them or shut them down, what we are really saying is “I’m more important than you are. I don’t really care what you think, I don’t have time for your opinion, or, this isn’t a conversation. It’s a contest, and I’m going to win.” In this Ted Talk, Preston helps to promote an understanding about intersectionality, allyship and an urgency for compassion.

Preston is historically the first Trans Woman to become Editor in Chief of a national publication. Shes been featured in nationally known media outlets like TeenVogue, NBC and The New York Times.

“If we’re all willing to bridge the divide and come together and advocate for all, we have the potential to breed true allyship. Our lives although very different are but pieces of a giant jigsaw puzzle and the only way we will ever see the bigger picture is when we come together.”

Ashlee Marie Preston

“I am not free while any womxn is unfree, even when her shackles are very different from my own.”

Audre Lorde

Sexual Assault Survivor Allyship CONTENT WARNING: this article describes an experience of sexual assault that could be triggering or uncomfortable to read.

Words by Francesca Smith

I am going to be sharing some difficult, and very personal information that only a handful of people are aware of. I am only sharing these stories as a way for people to understand where I am coming from and understand how allyship has impacted my life.

In 2014, when I threw a small party at my house, I had too much to drink and a guy who I did not know took me into my closet and sexually assaulted me.

In 2015, when I was a sophomore in high school, I went to a boy’s house for

a New Years Eve party, was made to drink to the point where I blacked out, and then I was dragged upstairs and r*ped.

In 2016, when I was with a couple of my friends at some guy’s apartment, I was plied with liquor until I started crying and was not coherent. He offered to “take care of me” and gave me a glass of water. Shortly after I was r*ped and then left alone to wake up in his bed the next morning.

My sexual trauma has been extremely difficult for me to process.

It was an incredibly

painful, frightening, and emotionally charged set of experiences. The lack of education, resources, and guidance in my community were huge barriers in my ability to do anything about it. I am from Carmel, Indiana which is about twenty minutes away from Indianapolis.

Being in a conservative city in a conservative state, consent education in schools was nonexistent, as well as support services for survivors. Despite the lack of resources that were at my disposal, I had caring friends who were truly amazing allies

and resources to help me through this incredibly difficult time.

Having to navigate consent and assault education on my own was very scary. I eventually told my parents about the incidents and, thankfully, they believed me. They asked me if I wanted to do anything about my abusers, like if I wanted to press charges or not. At the time I thought that any sort of legal action seemed like a lost cause, considering how many rape and sexual assault cases get bungled by the police and prosecuters in the courts. These cases

always seemed to devolve into some sort of “he said, she said” situation that ridicules and interrogates the survivor, and lets the abuser walk away free.

The failures of the justice system were something I was aware of even as a 15 year old. Being so young, I was mentally and emotionally unprepared to face my abusers in court. As much as I craved justice, I felt like it was an unwinnable fight.

As time passed, my assault had made me become incredibly distrustful of others. I would lash out at others. I began to startle

easily. Admittedly, I was not always the most pleasant person to be around during my most vulnerable points in healing. The world and some other people had tried to convince me that I was a “slut” and somehow this was all my fault, or some kind of big misunderstanding.

My trauma had hardened the already thick shell I had built to protect myself emotionally from the outside world. The understanding that I was grappling with diagnosis of PTSD began to sink in. When I think about what happened to me, it brings about feelings of

inadequacy, self-loathing, and fear. Intimacy with partners became incredibly complicated and confusing because of how my trauma made me feel about my own body and sexuality.

My self-hatred caused me to engage in risky behavior like c*tting, binge drinking, and unprotected sex with strangers–all because I didn’t care whether I lived or died. This spiraled into a series of failed su*cide attempts and mental health hospitalizations. At times it felt like the world was collapsing in on me like a falling carnival tent. My body and mind felt like a prison and I wanted nothing

more than to escape.

I counted on my family and friends to be my support beams during those excruciatingly painful times. I confided in them about my fears, sadnesses, and whatever mixed bag of emotions that would surface. Their allyship involved them putting up with a lot of pushback and problematic behavior on my end, and for that I am forever grateful. Allyship was something that I noticed as I started to grow older and I began to realize how many other women around me had also shared horrific stories of abuse,

molestation, and assault.

Some of my closest friends have endured unspeakable sexual traumas. To know that other women have suffered in the same way that I had meant that I was not alone in the world, which provided a certain amount of comfort. I know that these survivor friends have been some of my best allies in supporting me through my own traumas.

My parents and close friends believing me was what may have kept me from taking my own life during that dark period of time.

I owe my life to allies.

There are many ways to be a supportive ally to survivors of domestic abuse and sexual violence.

It can oftentimes be difficult to ascertain exactly what a survivor needs in their times of need. Education and resources are essential in being an ally that people in crisis would want to turn to. Within certain communities and parts of the country, there are fewer resources or of low and inconsistent quality. This is where allyship comes in. It is important to be surrounded by people that will support and guide survivors through the

difficult process of either disclosing and reporting or disclosing and choosing not to pursue action. Allies can have a tremendous positive impact on survivors of sexual assault. Being present with a survivor with active listening and using affirmations like “I believe you� and sensitivity to the subject are extremely important to support a survivor with. Allyship is not limited to just fellowship with other fellow survivors; allies can be anyone who cares about a cause enough to participate in the advancement of its values and ideals.

Sexual violence prevention

is something I am extremely passionate about now because of my personal experience with it. I know what it feels like to be that scared, lost girl having no idea what to do about a horrible thing that happened. I hope that every single one of those terrified and hopeless girls out there knows that they are believed and loved, despite what the world might tell them.

Education is Allyship Book list by Karyn Schultz

Eloquent Rage: a Black Feminist discovers her superpower.

Author Brittney C. Cooper, 1980 Location John E. Jaqua Law Libary, Popular Reading Collection Waking Up White: And Finding Myself in the Story of Race Author Debby Irving, 2014 Location John E. Jaqua Law Libary, 3rd - 4th floor This Muslim American Life: Dispatches from the War on Terror Author Moustafa Bayoumi, 2015 Location Knight Libary, General Collection White Fragility: Why it’s so Hard for White People to Talk about Racism Author Robin J. DiAngelo, 2018 Location Knight Libary

An African American and Latinx History of the United States Author Paul Ortiz, 2018 Location Eugene Public Libary So You Want to Talk about Race Author Ijeoma Oluo, 2018 Location Eugene Public Libary

Why are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? And Other Conversations about Race Author Beverly Daniel Tatum, 2017 Location Eugene Public Libary Algorithms of Oppression: How Search Engines Reinforce Racism Author Umoja Safiya Noble, 2018 Location Eugene Public Libary

WOMEN SUPPORTING WOMEN MEANS TRANS WOMEN, WOMEN OF COLOR, & LGBTQ+ WOMEN TOO Words by Kaylie Smith Photo by Michiro Ando

As a Straight White Woman, to be an ally to women culturally, physically and sexually different than me means to stay informed, support, donate and participate to protect those affected by a greater struggle than myself in this country and in this world.

Building up strong, selfless tendencies within ourselves is so important because if everyone shifted their focus to helping those other than themselves, we would all be helping each other more effectively. Take a look below at simple ways we can thrive in our roles as allies to empower, uplift, and inspire positive change for women everywhere.

Stay Informed To remain properly informed on current events in the media, you need to read something other than scrolling through articles shared on your timeline. Have you ever noticed that the same

group of people’s posts are always showing? That is because social media has filtration settings that prevent you from seeing posts from people you may not be as close with. Make sure that you are following different unfiltered news sources, campaigns, and activist accounts on Instagram.

Follow any of these accounts that you are not already following:

@timesupnow @lavernecox @iammarleydias @rvbyallegra @janetmock @them @feminist @bustle

@vice @vicenews @bitchmedia @bust_magazine @gurlstalk @sistersuncut @blacklivesmatter @salty.world

It’s important to alter your newsfeed in a way that informs us. We can give this support back through liking and commenting.

These magazines or news sources will give you the information that you are seeking, opposed to national news sources routinely filtering out current events involving women which thus, makes them less well-known to others. Bustle, Bitch Media, and Vice are focused on fastpaced, upcoming stories and are often the first to release their opinions and spread awareness of unknown stories.

Support Actively supporting a community of Women, Women of Color, Women with Disabilities, and LGBTQ+ Women is standing up for them, shutting down ignorance, and voicing your opinion whenever you can. In order to work towards a world that recognizes equality and love for all, we need to actively shut down those who express hate or inequality. Gain confidence in your own communication skills to be able to correct those who say sexist/ homophobic/ racist/ transphobic comments in public, so that you are able to explain that their behavior makes you feel uncomfortable. However, we must not put all of our focus in to shutting down hateful viewpoints; We must voice our own opinions through any way that may help others notice, ie. through powerful clothing,

handwritten social media posts, original art, and sharing links that support feminism.

Donate It is so important for us to make contributions to feminist magazines and non-profits that support women, in order to help fund them to continue their great work and make a change.

Donations are a personal thing, and for somebody who is a broke college student like myself, just donate when you are able to.

One morning this week, ditch your usual latte for coffee at home and feel empowered by your $5 going toward something impactful.

You also have the power to selectively shop where you want your money to go to: choose businesses and companies who actually give back to the community, shop at farmers markets, thrift stores with a cause and support local artists when you can.

Participate Sign online petitions that will be viewed by governments and corporations. Share the links for others to sign too. Attending feminist protests, marches and events will allows you to meet people, exchange ideas and be inspired by other feminists!

Keep in mind that International Women’s Day is March 8th, visit internationalwomensday.com to find events around you.

As for marches, check out womensmarch.com/sister-march.

Coloring Pages Artwork by Gabby J. @gabbyjmedia

It’s time to breath.

The Allyship Issue is full of knowledge and stories from people’s experiences told from their hearts, which can be a lot to take in. Take care of yourself by picking up coloring tools to fill in the white spaces of the last three pages created by an Oregon State Fine Arts Major.

Thank you for reading. Thank you for listening.

THE SIREN

THE FEMINIST MAGAZINE OF THE UNIVERSITY OF OREGON

SOCIAL MEDIA Instagram: @sirenmagazine CONTRIBUTE YOUR WORK https://www.thesirenmag.com/be-a-contributor