Page 34 Mental Wellbeing - Sláinte Magazine
“We do too much rushing around, and we need to take time to look after ourselves”
When my life turned all black John Kirwan was one of New Zealand’s most successful rugby players of all time, with 63 tests under his belt. But at the pinnacle of his success, he could barely drag himself out of bed because of depression. He tells Maria McHale how he faced up to his demons. At the height of his
particular, he has spent the
international rugby career,
last few years fronting a
John Kirwan found that the
hugely successful
pressure caused him
campaign to increase
serious mental health
depression awareness in
problems. In fact, he
his native New Zealand.
IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE SUFFERING DEPRESSION…
Do: Spend time with them.
struggled with depression
Listen rather than talk.
throughout his career, even
He wanted to front the
experiencing a major panic
campaign to ensure that
attack before one test
no one else should feel
match. “I was literally lying
alone or isolated if they are
in bed, shaking and crying.
feeling down. Five years of
I didn’t know why I was
campaigning means that
feeling like this and I didn’t
“at least now there’s
know what to do about it,”
definitely an awareness
he recalls.
that you can do something
Learn about depression – how it’s treated and how you can help. See yourself as part of their support team. Understand how depression affects their daily life. Encourage them to be healthy, to exercise and do things they enjoy.
Don’t: Tell them to “snap out of it” or “harden up”. Encourage excess alcohol or drug use as a coping strategy. Avoid them – they already feel isolated.
about it, that you are not
Assume the problem will just go away.
“When I told someone that
alone, that there is nothing
I thought I had a problem,
weird about you, and that
they said: ‘What are you
you will almost certainly
talking about, you’ll be
get better if you get the
bravery to stand up and say
We need to look after
fine. What have you got to
help you need.”
that maybe you need help,
our minds when they are
but if you can take that step
not well.”
worry about?’.”
Give unhelpful advice (“think of people who are worse off than you”).
Kirwan visited Ireland
and find someone who can
Now his advice to anyone
recently to help promote
help you work through it,
Now, he works on his own
feeling depressed is to
the Lean on Me campaign,
each day will get better,”
mental health every day –
keep talking to people and
which aims to dispel the
he explains.
giving himself time to
keep asking for help. “If
myths surrounding
indulge his hobbies of
the first person you speak
depression, encourage
“If you had a sore knee, you
playing guitar, cooking and
to doesn’t understand or
people to provide support
wouldn’t think twice about
reading. As he explains:
help you, then keep asking
to those affected by
going to the doctor, or
“Depression is a modern
until you find someone
depression and empower
trying to make it better by
illness, we do too much
who can.”
them to seek treatment.
putting an ice pack on it, or
rushing around, and we
something. We need to take
need to take time to look
that approach to our minds.
after ourselves.”
Like his friend Munster and
He believes there is less of
Ireland rugby player Alan
a stigma now about
Quinlan, who has also
admitting to being
battled depression in his
depressed, but that Irish
life, Kirwan has had the
people need to realise that
courage to use his high
help is available.
profile to help others. In
“I know it takes some
www.LeanonMe.net The Lean on Me website has excellent information about depression (including the causes, symptoms, treatments and so on), and a downloadable leaflet “How to Say Lean on Me”, that has advice on how to begin a conversation about depression, and how to support a friend or family member affected by depression.