SLOPE MAG
FALL 2015
an ode t o SWUG S
OD O F + KS O C U FOM TR
2015 TOP WOMEN OF
5 17 27 1
CAMPUS LIFE Who Do You Know Here? | 5 Fun Facts About Cornell | 7 The Arts Quad Virgin Myth | 9 These Cornell Students Want To See Your Junk | 11
We Eat A lot, Then We Study A lot | 12 Go Green | 13 Do You Know Where Your Money Is Going? | 14 Cornell Food Truck Guide | 15
LIFE & CULTURE A PSA on FOMO | 17 A Long Overdue Rant On The F*ckboy | 18 Top Women of the Year | 19
Winter Movies To Look Out For | 23 It’s Our Future, So Why Don’t We Act Like It? | 25
HUMAN INTEREST Missing The Point | 27 A Note On Almost Leaving The Hill | 29
A Letter To My Senior Self | 31 Tales Of A SWUG | 32
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EDITOR-IN-CHIEF JESSICA SION CREATIVE DIRECTOR DANIELLE GRINBERG
MISSION
MAG STAFF We are Cornell University’s multimedia powerhouse: We consist of dynamic members with a passion for what they do, striving for smooth operations with the end goal of creating quality content for the Big Red community. Slope is for students, by students.
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STATEMENT
PHOTOGRAPHY MARIEL TERR LAYOUT SARAH BROWN GRACE MCBRIDE BEN ROSS PRESIDENT YASMIN ALAMEDDINE VP OF CONTENT ZOE FORSTER WRITERS NICOLE BITON PIA BOCANEGRA JEREMY CANDELAS MICHELLE DIGIGLIO JACKY FALKENBERG JULIANA FARROW ALANNA FICHTEL CATHERINE GIESE DANIELLE GRINBERG WILL ISENBERG CAITIE LOOBY LIZA MANSBACH VIRGINIA NORDER ANNA RAVANELLE CHRISTINA REID ALISON SPANDORFER KELLY WEBB COPY EDITORS JEREMY CANDELAS ZOE FORSTER GABY KEANE JESSICA SION ALISON SPANDORFER ZOE ZANETEAS
LETTER FROM THE
EDITOR JESSICA SION As my time as editor comes to a close and the world beyond Ithaca looms unbearably close, I find myself reflecting on the people who have shaped my experience at Cornell. Among them: the professors, classmates, and friends of friends I’ve gotten to know; the o-week contacts who made their way into my phone after sharing a meal or two at RPCC and perhaps an inaugural first drink in collegetown; my roommates, my “day 1 homies,” and the CTB employees that know me (and my order) well. But most of all, it’s the faces I’ve met through Slope Media that have made my time on this campus so special.
Whether it’s my incredible team of extraordinary and impassioned writers, or the dedicated executive board members who value hard work as much as they do a good laugh – Slope Media has introduced me to a network of unique individuals I may not have found elsewhere. And at the risk of embodying the cliché of an excessively nostalgic college senior, I feel grateful for the opportunity to have been a part of such a re-
markable group of people.
I would be remiss if I did not mention the amazing piece of work in your hands. You may not see it, but cradled between these pages are months of brainstorming and editing; they speak to the talent and vision of a superhuman photo and design team; they understand the need for deadlines, extensions, and extended extensions; and they contain the witty articles and thought provoking narratives that make it all worth it.
And so, as my last hurrah as Editor-in-Chief, I present to you Slope Media Magazine’s Fall 2015 issue. Whether you decide to peruse our unofficial guide to the food trucks on campus, read about Elizabeth Garrett and Nicki Minaj, or empathize with one writer’s tales of a swug - enjoy this little piece of Cornell. Viva la Slope, Jessica Sion
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WHO DO YOU KNOW
HERE? an exposĂŠ on the exclusivity of cornell greek life
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CAITIE LOOBY
When I embarked on the notorious freshman migration to Collegetown on the first night of O-week, I felt an eager anticipation for the unknown. I had heard about the infamous frat parties in college, and I was finally about to debunk the mystery surrounding them. As I confidently strolled by CTB and the upperclassmen ridiculing the hordes of freshmen doing the exact same thing as me, I couldn’t help but feel excited. Gone were the days of awkward high school parties and drinking warm cheap beer in someone’s basement - it was time for some wild college parties! (Bear with naive freshman me for a moment.)
ple fire codes. Regardless of whether or not we were successful that first time (and the night ended with two pizza bagels, so I consider it a success), the exact same situation has repeated itself over and over.
I walked with twenty of my new closest friends (aka the people on my floor, aka the only people I actually knew at this point), and we lackadaisically made a game plan for the night. We would hit up one address because someone’s brother was friends with a junior in the frat, and then another address because someone’s OL said to stop by. One person made a remark about our solid ratio, which, admittedly, confused me slightly. When did fractions become a part of the equation? I shook it off as we continued our oh-so-important journey. At this point I was foolishly unaware of the obstacle we were about to encounter - one I would soon discover was integral to the social scene at Cornell. As we rolled up to the first house, we quickly learned that the three guys standing at the door held all of the power with one crucial question: “Who do you know here?”
Let’s be honest, frat parties have both their upsides and their downsides. Yes, they can be a lot of fun - especially if you are not involved in the bar scene. But at the end of the day, are they really worth all the effort we put forth to try to get in? We go through ridiculous lengths to try and gain access. Girls suddenly become a valuable commodity as guys plan their ratios far in advance, feeling no shame about asking a complete stranger in Collegetown to walk with them so they can increase their odds. It’s all about the connections you have, and it’s normal to walk up to a party with at least three names in mind (and two back up names that are not as strong of a connection but should be used in case of emergency and desperation). The mindset is this: the harder a party is to get into, the more fun it must be; exclusivity directly correlates to a better time.
Suddenly, the ability to gain entrance to a questionable house packed to the brim with warm Keystone and sweaty students became the only goal. It was time to pull out all the tricks we could: excellent negotiation skills (“I mean, 6 girls and 2 guys...can you really beat that ratio?”); exploiting every and any connection we may or may not have had with the frat (there is nothing worse than name-drop ping someone you barely know, only to find out that he is, in fact, the one standing at the door); whatever it took to enter the mysterious house that was definitely violating multi
FRATENITIONS (definitions for the clueless freshman. If you don’t know these words, don’t even venture in to collegetown.)
WHICH MAKES ME WONDER –
WHY IS IT SO EXCLUSIVE?
So what does all of this amount to? Don’t get me wrong - I’m not anti-Greek. Some of my most memorable nights here at Cornell have occurred at these aforementioned parties. I’m merely requesting (though to whom I’m not entirely sure) that we take away some of the exclusivity on one side - and lower our expectations (and raise our standards) on the other. Though your FOMO might be telling you otherwise, rest assured your night will go on. Worry not: there’s another party down the street where you have an even stronger connection, and it’s definitely (maybe) going to be even better.
ANNEX
KEYSTONE
RATIO
BARTONS
The quintessential and location of all the “popping” parties you’ll be attending during o-week. Don’t be that freshman and show up to an actual frat house or face being shunned for the rest of your four years.
If you’re a guy and want to get into a party, don’t even try unless you have 4+ girls with you. Literally grab random girls off the street. They don’t even need to go to cornell, just bring girls.
The most “gourmet” craft beer (lol) that you’ll ever find at a frat party. Make sure to tell upperclassmen how you’re able to shotgun a keystone in under a minute. You’ll seem super cool.
Another premium alcoholic beverage (liquor this time!!!) that you will no doubt find in a frat boy’s room–that is, if you’re lucky enough to get into the party.
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FUN FACTS EVERY CORNELLIAN
SHOULD KNOW ALANNA FICHTEL
As Cornellians, we hold our school traditions near and dear and cherish our favorites ones. But most of us don’t know when and how it became the way it is today. With a school over 150 years old, there’s lots of history to be learned. These facts are just a start.
SLOPE DAY
This beloved tradition didn’t always involve parties at 10 a.m. and a huge concert on the Slope. Originally called “Spring Day,” the event began in 1902 with carnival games and parades. In the 1960s and 70s, political protests around the country and at Cornell put a halt to the festivities. The event returned as Spring Fest in 1979 with a big barbecue on the Slope on the last day of classes. When the drinking age was raised in 1984, Cornell stopped serving alcohol on Slope Day, causing students to get a little too rowdy on their own and prompting the university to no longer endorse the event by the early 90s. Organizations were created to ensure students’ safety on the Slope, and the event soon became what we know it as today, with big names bringing live entertainment and tons of fun.
EZRA CORNELL & ANDREW DICKSON WHITE
These two men, who you might recognize from their statues on the Arts Quad, founded Cornell in 1865 on the idea of freedom, rejecting many traditional conventions of education at the time. Ezra Cornell, a businessman, envisioned Cornell as a university where (say it with us now) “any person could find instruction in any study” and emphasized the importance of producing graduates who would have an impact on society. Andrew White, who was an educator and scholar, became the university’s first president, serving for nearly two decades.
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THE CHIMES
You claim to hate them while studying diligently in the stacks, but let’s face it: a chimes concert every day is pretty unique. The first set of chimes were played at Cornell’s opening ceremonies on October 7, 1868. The bells are played by “chimesmasters,” who obtain their job by competing against other qualified musicians. The concerts feature a variety of songs, but the chimes always begin with a song dedicated to the donor of the bells in the morning, the “Alma Mater” in the afternoon, and the “Cornell Evening Song” at the end of the day.
DRAGON DAY
This tradition is one of the oldest at Cornell, dating back to 1901. The celebration initially marked the beginning of Spring - and these days it occurs on the Friday before Spring Break. If you haven’t stuck around to see it, you’re missing out on a unique event. Firstyear students in the College of Architecture, Art, and Planning build a large dragon to parade around campus. The tradition includes the dragon rivaling with a phoenix created by Engineering students, and ends with the dragon being burned on the Arts Quad.
OLIN AND URIS LIBRARIES
While they may not be your personal favorite places to study, these buildings at the center of campus have a lot of history behind them. Uris Library – originally called the University Library – opened in 1891 as the first library on campus. Olin was constructed much later in 1961, but it was preceded by Boardman Hall, which opened in 1892 as the new home for the Law School. Although expansions were added to the University Library, it soon could no longer hold the necessary volume of books and materials. Boardman Hall was then demolished to make room for Olin. Olin was known as the research or graduate library, while Uris was known as the undergraduate library. In the 90s, the libraries were officially named Olin and Uris and opened to all students on campus like they are today.
HOT TRUCK AND LOUIE’S LUNCH
New food trucks seem to be a current trend at Cornell, but these O.G. trucks will always be Cornell staples. Louie’s Lunch, the oldest food truck, was started by a Greek immigrant by the name of Louie Zounakos who came to Ithaca after World War I. He opened the the truck sometime between 1916 and 1920. The actual date is unknown because it’s said that he first pushed a cart around campus before settling his truck in front of Risley Hall. After his retirement, various families took over ownership, but they kept the tradition of Louie’s Lunch alive through today.Bob Petrillose opened his Hot Truck in 1960 after working in his family’s restaurant, Johnny’s Big Red Grill in Collegetown. Selling only pizza was innovative at the time, as pizzerias weren’t so prevalent in Ithaca and the idea for delivery had not yet been discovered. Although he passed away in 2008, “Hot Truck Bob” is still remembered by many Cornellians - and his pizza business lives on.
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VIRGIN HOW THE ARTS QUAD
MYTH (PROBABLY) STARTED
ANNA RAVANELLE
One fine winter night back in the early days of the university, Ezbro Cornell and A-Dog White were hanging out in Morrill Hall, looking out on the lawn that was to eventually become the Arts Quad. Electric lights were not yet on campus (they wouldn’t arrive until 1883), but by the light of the moon, they saw one of their very first students cross the quad. Just as the moonlight passed over the boy, the clock struck midnight, and they realized something was amiss about his disposition. Something in the way his shoulders slouched and how his steps were so unsure…the one explanation: he was a virgin. Was he was less of a man because he had yet to perform an arbitrary sexual act that changed exactly zero about who he was as a person? Yes. To Ezbro and A-Dog, this was simply unacceptable. Like the swim test that would be required for graduation in future years, that night it was decreed that no Cornell man was to graduate a virgin. That Cornell was the first co-ed school in
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the Ivy League just five years later was, consequently, no surprise. In the meantime, however, Ezbro and A-Dog had a problem to solve. They sought out that poor soul the next day. He was easily identified. While all his companions were speaking loudly and confidently, he remained quiet; while they glowed with confidence and charisma, he was as dull as the pearl gray sky above. Ezbro and A-Dog took him aside and informed him that he was to be automatically enrolled in an independent study with the pair of them; it was quite the honor. The student’s face lit up. Was this finally the end to all his problems? Was he finally going to be cool, and well-liked? Would his peers view him as a total stud? “You’ll be studying directly under us,” Ezbro said. “And we put the ‘stud’ in ‘studying.’” He fist bumped A-Dog.
So the two mentors set off to teach their new protégé the art of wooing women - and, more importantly, how to “get the milk for free” without “buying the cow.” It was no wonder Cornell became so well known for its Dairy science department. Despite all their lessons, however, their pupil had no luck. It was as if these time-honored methods (for example, never sharing his true feelings with a potential lady love) left something to be desired among the women he admired. He remained a mere shell of his true potential, a failure, because he could not get a member of the opposite sex to go against her better judgment and let him take her to bed. Eventually, graduation day came, and though the man did receive his academic diploma, Ezbro and A-Dog were disappointed. Alas, they had not founded an institution where “any person could find instruction in any study” as they had set out to do. Not only had their student failed, but so had they. When their respective statues were erected on the Arts Quad, years later, the rumors flew. The spirits of Ezbro and A-Dog were encased in the living statues and, if the right combination of events occurred, they would come to life. That is, when a virgin crossed the Arts Quad at midnight, they would get up and shake hands. Why, you may ask? When they ordered the statues to be built facing each other, they made a bet. The next virgin who crossed between them at midnight, much like that first one years before, would be their next project: whoever got their charge laid first won. Their handshake would seal the deal and start the contest. Why haven’t the statues woken up yet, then? Surely plenty of virgins have crossed at midnight. Hell, I myself have seen it happen. Since Ezbro and A-Dog died, it’s been generally established that virginity is a social construct, existing only in the mind of the individual. Because it has no bearing on one’s worth or “(wo)manliness,” its societal importance is gone. Besides, Ezbro and A-Dog have better things to do – like sabotaging Harvard hockey from beyond the grave.
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THESE CORNELL STUDENTS WANT TO SEE YOUR
JACKY FALKENBERG
Cornell is full of students hoping to build a bright path to their future careers. Some students have even taken the initiative to start their careers while still in school. Evan King ‘17 and Corey Dean ‘17 are two engineering students who saw an opportunity and did just that. Have you ever sold a pricey textbook back to the Cornell Store for virtually nothing? Well Evan King and Corey Dean have, and they’ve come up with a solution. Campusexposure.com is the new, less sketchy craiglist alternative that connects Cornell student sellers to Cornell student buyers. It is the easiest and least expensive way to cut out the middleman and get the most for your unwanted goods. The concept was launched last winter break when King felt cheated by the lack of money he received in exchange for his old text book. “I knew the Cornell Store was just selling my books back to students for a profit, and I wished that I could be connected to those students directly and keep a larger cut of the money,” he recalls. He brought the idea to Dean, a fellow engineer who met King after a long night of last-minute cramming for a prelim freshman year, and the idea took off. King explains, “If there’s something the doesn’t exist in the world that you want, make it yourself… especially if you don’t have the money to pay someone else to do it.”
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Without extensive website knowledge or real financial backing, King and Dean taught themselves how to create a buy-and-sell website that would satisfy their needs. “We aren’t monetizing the website at all. We just wanted to make a service for students by students, and we think that if more people know it exists, more people will start to use it,” King notes. If this testament isn’t proof enough, you can see their dedication for yourself on Ho Plaza. As Dean reveals, “our only real marketing is face to face. We spend our day out on Ho Plaza handing out fliers, retweeting any mentions of the website, and talking to people so they know we exist.” But they know that getting people to stop and listen to their great idea is no easy task - enter they’re “funnel” technique. “Corey stands in the middle of Ho Plaza, and when people try to avoid him, I stand behind him diagonally and get them to stop.” So far, their hands-on marketing approach has proven worthwhile. They already have over 20 sales completed per day, with 25,000 page views and over 7,000 unique users. Needless to say, King and Dean are already well on their way to being successful entrepreneurs.
LOT On a brisk and snowy December morning, the typical Cornell student heaves up the slope pondering, “Why did I think it was okay to eat two servings of stuffing, a slice of turkey, a big scoop of sweet potato sufflé (with marshmallows), a slice of pecan pie, a slice of apple pie, and a slice of pumpkin pie?!”
Those muffin tops you’ve noticed on all of your friends’ bellies (and maybe your own) are the signs of a productive Thanksgiving break. Inside jokes with your family, a house that now permanently smells like turkey, and time spent catch up on your rest and relaxation – Thanksgiving truly allows you to think about all for which you are grateful.
we eat a lot, then we study a
Now that Thanksgiving is over, Cornellians are returning with a heavy heart - and an even heavier stomach. Each and every one of us gets the post-Thanksgiving blues. At first, we miss our families and our pets. We miss the comfort of the homemade beds we laid in while watching Netflix (and not chilling with anyone). Still, though we feel somewhat sentimental, we look to the little things on campus that put smiles on our face and use them to fuel the long days ahead of us before Winter Break. If you’re missing the security of your family (and your bed), snap out of that funk and head to CTB with friends to laugh about some of your craziest memories while sipping on chai lattes. Or head to a friend’s apartment and trade fantasy football players. And if you’re missing Thanksgiving food, you can fill the void with the Winner Winner Chicken Dinner sandwich from the Dairy Bar. Your tastebuds will thank you. When all you need is some peace of mind, head to the top of the slope and look out at our glorious campus against the backdrop of Tompkins County. Cornell fosters a feeling of camaraderie and encouragement - never forget that everywhere you turn, there is a support system waiting for you.
ALISON SPANDORFER
So as you trek home from Mann at midnight, be grateful for all the food you ate this past Thanksgiving for providing you with an extra layer of fat to keep you warm. And remember: as the trees go bare and the skies get slightly greyer, as the snow gets heavier and more frequent - there will always be peppermint hot chocolates, cozy sweaters, and bean boots to hold you over until the next round of holidays.
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going
GREEN
JULIANA FARROW
Cornell’s Climate Action Plan, or CAP for short, is Cornell’s initiative to reduce carbon emissions on campus. The plan was developed by students and faculty in 2009 and has been pushed as a campus-wide movement ever since. Cornell has been taking the necessary steps towards climate neutrality by implementing a plethora of initiatives around campus. Luckily, there are many ways you can get involved and help put Cornell’s action plan in motion.
education
waste
The Climate Adaptation Planning initiative focuses on educating students on the impact of climate change. It also encourages research on the effects of climate change and how to counter it. Instead of back-stalking your friends next time you’re procrastinating in the stacks, educate yourself by reading up about climate change.
The University Waste Reduction Policy was implemented to help Cornell reduce waste. Some of the ways Cornell complies to the policy is by stressing the importance of food composting and increasing campus awareness on the proper bins to dispose of waste. Yes, the variously labeled bins can be overwhelming - but take that extra second to figure out if your fork is compostable. Better yet, use real dishware when it’s available.
dining
transportation
A simple way to help with the Climate Action Plan is to reduce your food waste on campus. Cornell has already implemented the Food Recovery Initiative - an initiative that helps students reduce the amount of waste they leave in the dining halls by eliminating trays, thereby discouraging students from taking too much food and decreasing portion sizes. Next time you’re hangry at RPCC brunch, be cautious to take only what you can eat!
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There are many ways you can help to reduce carbon emissions on campus - a big one being your choice of transportation. The best way to get your steps in is by walking from place to place, but if it’s too cold to feel your toes, try public transportation. Trust us, the TCAT is much more pleasant when it’s not the drunk bus.
energy
The Energy Conservation initiative is working towards creating buildings that are energy conservative. Part of this initiative includes introducing automatic functions, such as heat and lighting. According to Sustainable Campus, “the Energy Conservation Initiative would reduce university emissions by about 11,800 metric tons (CO2 equivalent) annually – roughly 5% of the current carbon footprint.” Play a part in energy conservation by flipping the lights next time you’re the last to leave the classroom.
CAP has been set in motion with these initiatives as well as many more around campus. The goal of creating a campus with net-zero carbon emission can be attained with the continued participation and support of the student body at Cornell. It is important that we are aware of Cornell’s efforts and do all that we can to help the initiatives do their best work.
$ $49,116
$32,976
The yearly tuition for the endowed colleges (A&S, Engineering, Hotel, AAP).
This is the same price as an entire four-bedroom house in Forest City, PA. Yeah, an education is nice, but is it better than having a roof over your head?
Yearly tuition for in-state residents at a contract college (ILR, CALS, HumEc).
$1,750
The monthly cost per bedroom of the penthouse apartment at the new 307 College Avenue complex.
At the same price as a new Honda Pilot EX, who needs a college degree when you could pick up your children from little league?
For only fifty dollars less than the average studio apartment in Manhattan’s Upper East Side, you can live in the center of the booming metropolis that is Collegetown.
DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR MONEY IS GOING? LIZA MANSBACH
$1,500
How much it costs to park your car in Collegetown. A.K.A. seven pairs of L.L. Bean Duck Boots - which you can wear on your walk to class when you’re too lazy to shovel your car out of the snow.
$10
The price of a Mac’s salad.
Of all people, Cornell students know more than anyone how expensive a college education can be. Although this year was the first time in fifty years that the tuition increase for out-of-state residents was less than 4%, everything within the Cornell bubble is still extremely expensive. Here are a few ridiculously priced goods and services at Cornell - along with suggestions for a better use of that money.
$350
The fee to opt out of the student health care plan. With this money, you could buy 44 bottles of Dayquil (which is probably just as effective as a trip to Gannett).
$165
The cost of a round trip ticket on the Campus-to-Campus bus. For the same price, you could buy a three-course steak dinner for 2 at John Thomas. Who needs to go to home for Thanksgiving when you could eat steak instead?
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YOUR YOUR UNOFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL GUIDE GUIDE TO TO CORNELL’S CORNELL’S FOOD FOOD TRUCKS TRUCKS VIRGINIA NORDER
The Cornell food truck game is definitely one of the best in the Ivy League. With a variety of cuisines and a convenience that only comes with food on wheels, we Cornellians have truly been #blessed. Make your next meal tasteful and memorable by eating at one of these five fabulous food trucks, located on our very own campus.
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LOUIE’S LUNCH
What began as a hand-pushed cart by a Greek immigrant evolved into the classic red and white truck loved by Cornellians. It is still located in its original spot (across the street from Risley Hall) and has served students since 1918. The menu includes burgers, hot and cold sandwiches, fried food, milkshakes, salads, and much more. Still not satisfied? We hear there’s a secret menu, too.
THAT’S HOW I ROLL
Specializing in sushi burritos, maki rolls and hand rolls, this food truck sits next to the iconic Louie’s Lunch during the week and makes its way to collegetown on the weekends. Its owner, Wopea Zegid, opened the cart in April of this year - but this isn’t his first go-around with Japanese cuisine; Zegid used to be the head sushi chef at Plum Tree. The bright orange truck offers everything but a traditional experience, with a menu that features unique flavor combinations in the form of sushi burritos, also known as “Sushiritos.”
THE HOT TRUCK
This Cornell staple has been serving pizza subs since the 60s. Located at the bottom of West Campus, its signature item is the Poor Man’s Pizza (PMP), a French bread pizza sub. The PMP can be customized with your choice of toppings, meats, sizes, and more. Founder Bob Petrillose chose the name “Hot Truck” to counter Louie’s Lunch - which, at the time, only served cold foods. The Hot Truck is a late night staple for anyone craving some midnight pizza.
DOS AMIGOS TACOS
Hotelie seniors and West Coast natives David Farahi and Jorge Bouras wanted to bring a little hometown flair to the East Hill. So this past summer, the two friends founded Dos Amigos Tacos, a food truck serving up a hybrid of traditional Mexican and Southern Californian cuisine. Dos Amigos is open Thursday to Saturday from 10pm–2am. Located at the corner of Eddy and Dryden in Collegetown, this truck is conveniently close to Dunbars and Level B. Ever drunk eat fresh churros? Trust us on this one.
COLLEGETOWN CREPES
Neighboring Dos Amigos is another food truck started by two Cornell students: Collegetown Crêpes. Freshly made and internationally inspired, their whole grain, buckwheat crêpes are a unique complement to both sweet and savory flavors. Only the simplest, highest quality ingredients go into these skinny pancakes - and the combinations are endless. We’ll probably go with strawberry and nutella, though.
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a psa on
FOMO E
OL IC
N
N TO I B
We all know the feeling. You know, the feeling of crushing anxiety you get every so often (and usually at the least convenient times). It creeps up on you slowly, subversively, so that before you’re even aware of it, it has consumed you. You feel it in the pit of your stomach, and it’s a constant pulsing in the back of your head. It’s what keeps you up at night—and keeps you out at night; it tempts you to do things you don’t necessarily want to do and keeps you from doing what you need. This is regret. This is fear. This is...FOMO. If you’ve made it this far in life without having experienced FOMO—the Fear of Missing Out—you’re either lying or perfect (and like, I celebrate you, I guess). The truth is that feeling this way has become not just commonplace, but also pretty hard to avoid. It’s an awkward psychological tug-and-pull, the effects of which range from involuntary action to complete inertia. When we think of FOMO, we typically think of it in a social context. Common scenarios include debating—and finally convincing ourselves—to skip out on another Saturday night (or Friday or Thursday, for that matter). In no small part does technology play into this. FOMO may have existed pre-social revolution, but the ability to scroll through Facebook and Instagram the morning after a night out has mutated it into something much greater and much more consuming. The problem is not that these media allow you to see how epic your friends’ nights were; the problem is that they enable you to see that these nights were epic without you. It’s social anxiety at its finest, and potentially the worst form of it. But FOMO affects our day-to-day lives even
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life & culture
FOMO: /fōmō/ {informal noun} Anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere,often aroused by posts seen on a social media website.
more than we realize—which is perhaps the most dangerous part about it. It affects what classes you take, what clubs you join, and even where you study. As you get older, it even hinders your decision-making process when it comes to important decisions like what jobs or internships to accept. What it essentially boils down to is a problem with opportunity: we avoid doing what we want to be available for something better if it comes along. An even bigger issue that should be pointed out is how relatively trivial this “problem” actually is. How jaded have we become as a generation that our biggest stressors are not what to do, but rather what not to do? Do we have a right to complain that the variety of media that are meant to bring us together are tearing us apart? That’s not to say that FOMO doesn’t have its perks. It can be the best defense against laziness and procrastination in that it entices you to do something. It becomes problematic, however, when it reduces you to indecision and, in effect, immobility. When an excess of opportunity became problematic is all very unclear. Well, quite frankly, I think it’s time to take a stand. This is me saying that my cell phone should not be a ball to which I am chained. It’s okay to spend a Saturday night studying for your next prelim or, say, binge-watching Netflix with nothing but a personal pizza. It’s okay to take a leap of faith instead of waiting for something better to come along, and it’s also okay to move at your own pace at the risk of settling. The choices you make should simply be yours, not a result of excessive pressure. And if you do miss out, life does not end—another night and another chance will be just around the corner.
The era of “Netflix & Chill” is upon us. Don’t deny it; it’s inescapable. And who may we thank for this intellectually-stimulating term? The f*ckboy, of course (or if you want to spice it up, the f*ckboi).
We are fortunate enough to attend such an esteemed university filled with academic prestige, a highly acclaimed alumni network, and students who value intelligence and their work ethic above a Keystone Light (well…sometimes). But those core values are less eviWe millennials absolutely love to come up with schol- dent when I walk into a bathroom at a frat to find some arly-sounding slang. Think: “basic,” “YOLO,” “swag,” poor girl crying over how John is taking a freshman to - and the latest term you most certainly will not see on formal instead of her. We’ve all been there. He told you an SAT exam anytime soon - ”f*ckboy.” Welcome to the that you were different; you were convinced that he was age of Tinder, the age of Bumble, the age of “haha and the Chuck to your Blair. Sorry to break it to you: you then what? ;)” just fell into the trap of the “Netflix and I want to make you overanalyze every single time I like your instagram The f*ckboy is not just the tactless guy who didn’t text selfie.” you back after you met at a frat party last Saturday. It’s become an entire lifestyle - and, trust me, it’s here to The sad truth is that f*ckboys have come to defile the stay. millennial dating scene. No matter how many times you tell yourself you’re done, they magically crawl back into What is a f*ckboy, you ask? Look at yourself and ask that your life. Suddenly, you find yourself thinking, “Oh wow, question again, because you know. He’s the guy you he’s so mature to own up to his mistakes.” Think again. meet at a party, in class, or at Level B (#FishbowlsBring- He just got bored with his other prey. inPeopleTogether). He’s the one you magically crossed paths with, the one who courted you respectfully. Kid- Why do we take the f*ckboy back again and again and ding, that wouldn’t happen at Cornell–or anywhere. again? Because we hear stories about how our friend’s friend met her once-delinquent boyfriend and turned This guy is a master of feigning interest and making it him around, and the anomaly becomes the expectation. seem like his world revolves around lucky little Y-O-U. There’s that small sliver of gleaming hope in every girl’s And then, suddenly, he’s not so present. His read re- mind that we will be the one to finally change his ways. ceipts are on, and he is blatantly ignoring you. He opens But the truth is, we could easily get over f*ckboys if they your snap, and it clearly does not warrant his response. would leave us the f*ck alone. He nods “sup” to you at a party, and proceeds to keep flirting with the girl he plans to victimize next.
F*CK DANIELLE GRINBERG
BOY
A LONG OVERDUE RANT ON THE
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KELLY WEBB
If you type “Top Women of 2015” into Google, the top two results are AskMen.com’s “99 Outstanding Women” and IMDb’s “Top 100 Sexiest Women.” I’m not about to launch into a feminist debate, but I do plan to discuss my top picks for the most influential women of this past year without using the adjectives “hot,” “gorgeous,” “sexy,” or “beautiful.” I’m not refuting that these women are anything besides that; rather, they are foremost influential, forward-thinking and just plain kickass. So read on to discover some of the women who are making big waves in our society.
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US WOMEN’S NATIONAL SOCCER TEAM
For the first time ever in video game history, Alex Morgan will appear on EA Sports’ Fifa ‘16 cover. She is not just blessing gamers with her physical presence on the case - this is also the first edition in which women characters will play in the video game. This is huge, as it highlights the impact that the women’s soccer team has had on the U.S. this past year. The Women’s World Cup was the most-watched soccer match in U.S. history; never before has the nation’s attention been so captured by a women’s professional sport. The World Cup Final shocked the entertainment industry, and I’m certain that the women of the team will only continue this trend as the sport begins to pick up a fan base throughout the country.
HILLARY CLINTON
Although she is not the first woman to run for president (that was Victoria Woodhull, 1872 - read up on your history), Clinton has made strides in cracking the glass ceiling that professional women face. Women of our generation have spent their entire adult lives in the United States voting only for candidates of the male gender, but Hillary makes it crystal clear that women are more than qualified to join the race. On top of that, she has only ever acted with respect and confidence. After she dropped out of the 2008 presidential race, she still thanked her supporters for helping women take a major step into a world of equality.
AMY SCHUMER
Amy Schumer has skyrocketed in popularity this past year. She not only says what she wants, when she wants, but she also refuses to act and look like what society deems “acceptable,” all while staying humorous. Calling out the comedy world is a hard thing to do, given that it’s essentially ruled by the opposite sex. “I’m labeled a sex comic,” Schumer says in her HBO special. “I think it’s just ‘cause I’m a girl. I feel like a guy could get up here and literally pull his dick out, and everyone would be like, ‘He’s a thinker.’” Despite the occasional criticism, Amy is met with an overwhelming majority of people applauding her efforts and for staying “real.”
NICKI MINAJ
Thankfully, it’s not novel for Nicki Minaj to tell women to focus on developing themselves for the better. Whether she’s at a concert convincing girls to stay in school, demanding more orgasms from their significant other, or shutting down reporters for belittling her, she has paved the way for women to demand their equality this year. Honestly, my words won’t even be able to do Nicki justice. Instead, I’ll let Nicki do it herself with these memorable quotes from her NYT interview: ‘‘To put down a woman for something that men do, as if they’re children and I’m responsible, has nothing to do with you asking stupid questions, because you know that’s not just a stupid question. That’s a premeditated thing you just did.’’ Followed by, “I don’t care to speak to you anymore.”
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JENNIFER LAWRENCE
Jennifer Lawrence admittedly gave up being “liked” by Hollywood to bring to light the role sexism still plays in her career. In late 2015, Jennifer penned an essay titled “Why Do I Make Less than my Male Co-Stars?” in which she discusses her feelings about the gender pay gap in Hollywood and how it’s inexcusable that she should be making any less than her male co-stars. By taking this risk, Jennifer Lawrence decided to forgo her “cute and adorable” mentality and be aggressive about her career and the social conditioning of complacency that women face. Many female actresses have praised Jennifer Lawrence, and her Silver Linings Playbook costar Bradley Cooper publicly congratulated her on taking a stand.
CARA DELEVIGNE
This fall, Cara Delevingne opened up about her personal struggle with depression in an interview with Rupert Everett - an especially impactful revelation, considering her large influence on teens through her social media presence. Mental illness still holds a huge stigma in society, and many suffering individuals often try to hide or cover up any issues they feel. This only makes matters worse; by the time the truth surfaces, it can be too late. By speaking openly about her personal struggles in a public interview, Cara inspired people everywhere to take a step forward in talking about depression. More than anything, it’s refreshing to see a star admit that not everyone is as perfect as they may seem on the outside. Cara encouraged people to seek help, and hopefully more individuals will be motivated to break through the mental stigma and do just that.
PRESIDENT GARRETT
For the record, I would just like to state that I was on a plane ride with President Garrett coming home from a sports event with my team. I was too nervous to talk to her for the entire ride until I managed to mess up the alma mater a few times before landing. Thankfully, she turned around, introduced herself, and mentioned that she couldn’t wait to learn the song herself. Women now lead half of the Ivy League, and our own woman–the first to lead Cornell–deserves a special thanks.
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6
OSCAR WORTHY Movies to Look Out For This Winter Break
PIA BOCANEGRA
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Winter is here. And with it comes a wave of potential oscar-worthy films. Because the Academy Awards are just around the corner, a significant number of quality movies are released during this time of year. Whether it’s Cornell Cinema, Cinemapolis, or even the Loews back home - get ready to take multiple visits to the nearest movie theater in the next few weeks. Here are 6 movies that will most likely reel in those Oscar nominations next year:
1. Macbeth
You might remember Macbeth as one of those Shakespearean plays you were forced to read and tediously decipher back in high school. However, as a December release date looms in the near future, the time has come to change how you view this classic play. The inventive adaptation, directed by the acclaimed Justin Kurzel, may just be the film of the year. Judging by the trailer alone, the cinematography captures the true essence of Macbeth. Starring Michael Fassbender (who, by the way, has been starring in a lot of Oscar-worthy movies this year) and Marion Cotillard, Macbeth has already received positive reviews from movie critics. Keep your eyes peeled, Macbeth may be the frontrunner of the 2016 Oscars.
2. The Danish Girl
Eddie Redmayne, who won last year’s Academy Award for Best Actor for his role as Stephen Hawking in The Theory of Everything, plays Lili Elbe, one of the first to receive gender reassignment surgery, in The Danish Girl. Eddie Redmayne might as well be known for his impersonations of struggling historical figures. With the help of makeup and hair, he is transformed into a transgender and is almost unrecognizable in this movie’s trailer. But don’t get too excited - The Danish Girl received mediocre to positive reviews from those who saw it in the Venice and Toronto film festival. Although
this movie will most likely not be nominated for Best Picture, Eddie Redmayne may be adding another Oscar to his collection - and, if not, the movie’s head makeup artist certainly will.
3. The Hateful Eight
If you’ve caught the trailer of The Hateful Eight, you can tell that the movie more or less follows the recipe for Oscar success - it is, after all, written and directed by the one and only Quentin Tarantino. This film has a well-written screenplay, fantastic cinematography, and a star-studded cast, including Tarantino vets Samuel L. Jackson and Kurt Russell. Set in post-civil war Wyoming, The Hateful Eight tells a story about eight bounty hunters who attempt to seek shelter during a blizzard. This one will definitely be racking up several nominations - like many of Tarantino’s award-winning movies.
4. Revenant
Last year, director Alejandro Inarritu gave us Birdman, Best Picture of 2015; this year, he brings us Revenant. The trailer speaks for itself - the movie looks like a visual masterpiece. Based on the true story of Hugh Glass, Revenant is about a Western frontiersman who seeks revenge on those who left him for dead and killed his son after a bear mauling. The long shots (so notably Inarritu) reveal excellent craftsmanship and truly capture the cold, snowy Dakota Territory. If the director and story haven’t convinced you yet, Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hardy star in this film. Maybe this year Dicaprio will (finally) get the Oscar he rightfully deserves. Either way, you definitely need to watch this biographical thriller film.
5. The Good Dinosaur
Step aside, Inside Out - The Good Dinosaur might snag the Oscar for Best Animated Feature. Although both films were brought to you by the same creators, The Good Dinosaur is only the second Pixar film not to be directed, written, and
produced by the ‘core’ Pixar team (the other being Brave). The premise of the movie seems to have a lot of potential: a young Apatosaurus, Arlo, meets a caveboy, Spot, on his journey home after losing his father in an accident. This is the first time Pixar has released two feature films in the same calendar year - meaning Pixar may end up battling itself for the Best Animated Feature in this upcoming Oscars.
6. Spotlight
With an impressive Rotten Tomatoes score of 97%, Spotlight tells the true story of The Boston Globe’s “Spotlight” team and their work on the Massachusetts Catholic sex abuse scandal. Initially not regarded as the favorite in the Toronto International Film Festival, Spotlight deserves the hype that it has recently been receiving. Directed by a rather indie director, Tom McCarthy, this movie might end up being the underdog of the Oscars. Michael Keaton, nominated for Best Actor last year, Rachel McAdams, and Mark Ruffalo star in Spotlight - a raw, unembellished, straightforward film about the realities of journalism. This movie has been receiving praise for a fitting cast that accurately captures the group dynamic of the “Spotlight” team. Although this flick may not necessarily be a frontrunner, it will most likely excel in the Supporting Actor/Actress categories. Bare in mind that this list is not exhaustive; there are plenty of movies (like Spectre, Creed, and Youth) that will most likely be nominated in the upcoming Oscars that were not mentioned above. If you find the time, familiarize yourself with the Oscar-worthy films and get your predictions ready before the big day: February 28, 2016.
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JEREMY CANDELAS
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Growing up, we Millennials have constantly been told that the future is supposedly ours for the taking - so why don’t we actually act like it this election cycle? Whether you are a Republican, a Democrat, or an independent voter, your vote matters. Some of the top issues that our nation faces today directly affect us; unless we decide to take action, our opinion ultimately means nothing to the politicians who lead our country. In Cornell’s 2015 Taking America’s Pulse survey, nearly 88% of individuals ages 18-24 stated that they planned to be at least “somewhat politically active.” Overall, this number drops down somewhere between 65-70% for older generations. Yes, at first glance, you may be thinking, “there’s no way.” And you’d be right. We know from previous elections that we do not have anything close to that level of voter turnout. As Millennials, we’re all talk; we fail to act when the time actually comes to have our voices heard, and we wonder why nothing changes. The fact is, whether you like it or not, the political happenings in Washington affects us each and every day. Soon enough, we’ll be starting families and careers - and, sure enough, the political process will continue to affect us. If we want to make sure the issues we care about are actually confronted, we must take the time away from our Netflix-binge sessions every now and then to go out and make a difference. At the same time, it’s important to realize that there is no candidate who will serve as a panacea for the issues our generation faces. Both political parties are guilty of propping up candidates based on their idealistic narratives – whether it’s promising that free college tuition for everyone is the simple and easy solution to America’s problems, or guarantees that a “yuuuge” wall will solve the immigration crisis, crime, and unemployment. It is excruciatingly easy to fall victim to such an idealistic mentality without bearing mind to the actual consequences of those actions. We cannot allow our generation to suc-
cumb to the far-fetched promises of a 3rd grade-esque candidate for Class President who is promising to grant us free ice cream, extra recess, and no homework. We must realize what is possible, what is not possible, and what the consequences of the candidate’s proposed changes will be. As young voters, if we truly hope to see real, beneficial change, it is important that we not only act upon our political intentions by voting - but also go a step further and take the time to understand the world around us. We live in a society where information is instantly available via the technology we keep in our pockets. However, many of us spend more time sending drunken Snapchats and swiping through Tinder than learning what is happening around the world today. Although our courses expose us to a vast amount of information and discussion, we must also realize that there are some things we just cannot learn in the classroom. Furthermore, we must ensure that we balance the way in which we digest such information. An echo-chamber of thought and ideology serves us no good. Tuning to Rush Limbaugh and Fox News as a source of information will leave you poorly informed, as will failing to acknowledge anything besides CNN and the Huffington Post as a “real news source.” The truth is, there is no unbiased media. Some are simply more overtly biased than others. The only effective counter to this is to expose oneself to as many viewpoints as possible and to be open to dialogue with those from differing viewpoints – not just to engage in a political shouting match on Facebook filled with ad hominem attacks on those you disagree with. We are capable of change, but in order for change to actually occur we must be willing to take the necessary steps to create that change. This is more than just voting; this is becoming an educated citizen. As Cornell students, we have an obligation to be models for such behavior. It’s our future, so let’s act like we care this time around.
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A
s cliché as it may sound to “live in the moment,” it has become something we need to consciously reprioritize. We can complain all we want about not having the time, but at the end of the day, it’s up to us to allocate our time meaningfully.
Our daily routine involves heading to the library to work on assignments irrelevant to our lives after graduation. By doing so, we sacrifice the time we could’ve used to research future careers or discover new passions. Instead of striking up a conversation with the person sitting alone in the dining hall, we go to parties at the usual place filled with faces of people we already know. Some of us neglect the hobbies and activities we enjoy to attend club meetings we only joined so that we could have something to show for ourselves. Sometimes that late night conversation with a new friend pays off more than that early night’s sleep. There are plenty of hidden opportunities and lessons all around us; it’s up to us to find them. Attending an incredible institution like Cornell is a privilege that even the best of us may sometimes take for granted. There are endless resources available to us for research, outreach, and volunteer opportunities. We are immersed in an expansive and diverse community in which anyone can find his or her own niche by joining clubs that are always open to fresh ideas and new faces. We’ve all spent days at a time in the library, cramming for an exam in a pointless course that will have no traction beyond that semester. But have you ever paused and asked yourself why? We all need to stop, look around, and think. We’re missing the point. If you can’t find value in what you’re doing, you need to reconsider it. Many of us believe that the difference between a B and a B+ in Statistics will significantly affect our future. Our grades matter to us because we think they reflect who we are as people - our overall intelligence, character, values, potential. We believe they have the power to ultimately determine our future. We put an immense amount of pressures on ourselves in order to succeed, and many times we end up settling for less. Instead, we should be making time for hobbies, passions, and relationships, all of which are extremely important to our personal growth. You can learn a lot about yourself by doing what you enjoy. That Wines course may not give you credit towards your Math major, but you’ll learn valuable lessons that calculus couldn’t quite give you. So step out of your comfort zones. Stop living assignment to assignment, or weekend to weekend, and start enjoying yourself. We are at one of the most important stages of our lives; now is the time discover ourselves and explore our potential. Remember: instead of gazing at the sunset from Olin behind your laptops, take a minute to walk outside and enjoy the view from the slope. Don’t ever underestimate the value of the lessons you can learn outside of the classroom, for they can truly shape the rest of your life.
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mis
sing
MI
CH
EL
LE
DI
the
GIG
LIO
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I’m restless. I can’t stay in the same place, study the same subject, or work on the same project for too long or else I’ll get bored. I have too many places I want to go and too many things I want to do with this short life. I’m always moving, always changing, and never still. I came to Cornell all the way from Los Angeles, California because I wanted to be in a place that was as far away and different as possible. Well, I got what I wanted - or at least what I thought I wanted. The East Coast is traumatically different from the chill, hipster Hollywood lifestyle. At first, I didn’t get the intense Cornell atmosphere. Students seemed remarkably focused and organized, much unlike the strange and borderline directionless people I generally associated with in high school. Not only that, but many of them seemed to already have mutual friends as well. Needless to say, awkward small talk ensued. Aside from the social aspect of college, I struggled, like a lot of my fellow freshmen, with my first real academic challenge in the form of an Ivy League education. I was in the wrong major because I hadn’t given my strengths and weaknesses much thought. I was working harder than I ever had on schoolwork and still felt like I wasn’t measuring up. Coming into Cornell, I thought I had an idea of what I wanted to do with my life, but everything came crashing down when I realized that my current path was not for me. By the second semester of my freshman year, I had joined a sorority and a couple clubs and figured out a vague direction to start wandering in academically. I got into the swing of things, and my life was looking up. In fact, by the end of the year, I was actually a little sad to leave Ithaca - which was a lot different from the previous semester when I had counted down the days until I could get out. Still, when my plane landed in LAX, sunlight streaming through the tiny window, I was surrounded by familiar rolling brown hills, palm trees that sprouted wherever there wasn’t cement, and six lane freeways in all their traffic-congested glory. I was home, and everything in me rejoiced. As I started to get back into my familiar lifestyle, I also really started to think. I’d be lying if I said that living across the country and being immersed in an elite culture hadn’t changed me. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I liked who I had become. I wasn’t sure if I liked my Cornell personality that went out on the weekends and talked about boys and formals as a way to bond with people. I wasn’t sure if I liked that I put on a massive front of being put together and focused. I missed being the California girl who explored LA’s hidden gems, bonded with people over indie music, road trips, and thrift shopping, and did whatever the moment called for. So I looked into the transfer process for a couple of schools in LA. This way, I reasoned, I could be me. I fit in here. This was where I belonged. Maybe, just maybe, I would be that much happier - if only
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I could just be here where everything was familiar and made sense. Maybe I would feel more alive if I wasn’t surrounded by what I perceived as ultra high-achieving type-A’s. I looked at the applications and the transfer requirements; I figured out which classes I needed to take and what paperwork I needed to get together. Naturally, I told my mom that I was doing all of this. She looked at me and asked if giving up the Ivy League was something I really wanted to do. For some context, my family is not obsessed with the Ivy experience at all. There was no push for me to even apply to the Ivies. In fact, when I got in, there was quite a discussion over why it was impractical and unnecessary for me to attend Cornell when there were so many amazing schools so close to home. You can imagine that when I heard my mom’s concerns about me giving up on it that I really stopped to reflect upon whether or not I really wanted to transfer out. Cornell had been a slightly unattainable dream of mine since my junior year in high school. I put everything I had into my application and - as much as I hate to admit to this incredibly embarrassing moment - cried when I got in. As difficult as moving across the country was, I was and am so grateful for the experience. I learned so much in the way of navigating various social situations. My classes were tiring and hard and left me burnt out, but they were worth it because I was learning how to really think for the first time in my life. The friends I had made were amazing and inspiring in more ways than one. The people who surrounded me pushed me like I had never been pushed before. Yes, I was a little different at college than I was back home - but that didn’t make me any different at the core. Rather, I had created a new dimension for myself. I decided that I wasn’t being fake by adapting. I wasn’t any less of a California girl who loved nothing more than the latest quinoa recipe and the feeling of warm sand under her feet just because I was also a sorority girl at school in New York. So what if I was a hipster and a sorority girl at the same time? Are they supposed to be mutually exclusive? I don’t need to fit into one or the other. I’m allowed to be whoever I am regardless of how I interact with others in different settings. Changing schools wasn’t going to solve any problems that I had with myself, and I knew deep down that it wouldn’t be what I wanted academically. In the end, I closed up all my applications because my problem wasn’t with the school - it was with myself. That’s not to say that everyone who considers transferring needs to suck it up and do some soul-searching - but to recognize that your school does not define you. After much thinking, I realized I didn’t need to switch schools in order to be myself and find happiness. Cornell was where I belonged - and so I bought my one-way ticket back to Ithaca two weeks later.
a note on
ALMOST leaving the hill CATHERINE GIESE
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Ju
A L ETO TMYT E R SENIOR
SELF
D
WILL ISENBERG
EAR SENIOR SELF,
I recently got your letter, titled “Letter to my Freshman Self.” I must admit, I’m not sure how that made it back through time, but I appreciated the advice all the same. I will definitely make sure to cherish these years, make lots of friends, and try new things. I also thought I would offer some of my own advice as you head towards graduation. I realize it’s unusual for me, a naive freshman, to be imparting wisdom to a senior like you - but I believe I can provide some insight.
DON’T BE STRESSED ABOUT WHAT YOU’RE DOING AFTER COLLEGE. Remember when you were still in high school? You were worried about how you would ‘fit in’ at Cornell and make new friends. But you survived, didn’t you? You said hi to everyone in Clara Dickson Hall that first weekend, asked TAs and professors for help, and found a family of your own doing the most unexpected things. You were scared, but everything worked out and things will continue to work out after you graduate, I promise. KEEP IN TOUCH WITH THE FRIENDS THAT YOU MADE. You’ve invested so much time in your relationships here, don’t just let the people closest to you drift away. That would be lame.
DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP. I’m worried that you’ll forget how willing people were to help you as an undergrad. They’ll be just as eager to help afterwards and everywhere else. And don’t worry about looking foolish - asking for help is sign of maturity for graduates as well as freshmen. TAKE RISKS. Remember when you were too afraid to try anything new during your first month here? It took you all the way until October to try out a new sport, and it turned out to be the most fun you had all year. Even though you may think you’re too old to be adventurous, keep pushing yourself to step outside of your comfort zone. DON’T PANIC. Remember how devastated you were when you got dumped your second week here? Or how you failed that first prelim? The point is: you have survived just fine thus far, and you will continue to do so in the future. You are smart enough to handle any situation life throws at you and that won’t go away when you graduate. As for everything you wrote in your letter to me: right back at you. If there’s one thing I learned in my short semester here, it’s that life and people are much the same wherever you go. So remember to expand your network, stay chill, and go out and party once in a while. Love,
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cro me un stu re my ca ha mo at cra of Ho no bo as ye ha on all su a th fas my flo Ia go gr is fo an Ith my flo co sc th ne rig ab it Sm kn be up th to ex a sta im tra we th fin W I h po
Just three weeks ago, I arrived at a evolution was gradual, taking place over
crossroads in my life. My friends invited the course of my four years here, it feels me out for a night of fun and I declined like it may have been just as quick as the under the vague excuse of “needing to blink of an eye. And now I find myself in study.” Instead of painting Collegetown the same position as Jon Stewart postred, I ordered a thin crust pizza and began Daily Show. What happens now? How my Scandal binge. I was so enthralled with long will this uneasiness last? Will we catching up on what I had missed that I both make it? Unfortunately, I just don’t hadn’t noticed what I was putting into my know. But here’s hoping that we do - and mouth. That is, until I finally looked down that the rest of our lives will be just like CHRISTINA REID at the boxCHRISTINA and noticed a REID creepy critter cheesy, fresh, and untouched pizza. Just crawling out from underneath the cheese three weeks ago, I arrived at a crossroads of one of my slices. What had I done? in my life. My friends invited me out for How could I have inhaled that pizza and a night of fun and I declined under the not have even noticed? This moment -- vague excuse of “needing to study.” both harrowing and hysterical -- serves Instead of painting Collegetown red, I as an impossible what ordered a thin crustseem pizzatoand began of. my Just omen three for weeks ago,senior I arrived at that I couldn’t get enough a crossroads in my life. My friends high school also very small, year may hold for me. My life at Cornell ScandalMybinge. I was was so enthralled with outI’m forafraid a nightthat of funcatching and so up I loved factI that could come has been prettyinvited swell,me but on the what had I missed that I declined under the vague excuse of across several new people in an instant. once I get to the end of my time here, I hadn’t noticed what I was putting into “needing to study.” Instead of painting I cherished my right as a freshman all that awaits me is a wholly That is, until I finally looked Collegetown red, unpleasant I ordered a thin my crustmouth. to walk up to just about anyone and surprise (like, say, menacing As binge. down the box andbe noticed creepy pizzaaand began mybug). Scandal I at introduce myself, it in linea for the so enthralled withthough catching up on bathroom a first semesterwas senior, I feel as critter crawlingat out from underneath Goldwin Smith or at the I had missed that I hadn’t communal watering holeslices. knownWhat as the real world what is approaching faster and noticed the cheese of one of my what I was putting into my mouth. That “Nasties.” faster. Upon further reflection, I find that had I done? How could I have inhaled is, until I finally looked down at the box my life at college, as I’veaknown it, hascrawling that pizza and not have even noticed? and noticed creepy critter So what happened between then and from the cheese of one now? flown right pastout me. Atunderneath this very moment This When moment both did I--give up harrowing on trying of my slices. What had I done? How I am asking myself: Where has my youth and hysterical -- serves as an impossible to complete the list of 161 things could I have inhaled that pizza and not to do, and when did I stop trying to gone? Why have I already found four omen for what senior year may hold have even noticed? make Only one possible grey hairs atop my head? And if this for me. Mynew lifefriends? at Cornell has been explanation seems to exist. I, much is the case, then what’s next forharrowing me? pretty swell, but I’m afraid that once This moment – both and like a Pokemon, have evolved into my hysterical – serves as an impossible I look back on my freshman year I get to end my time here,intoall finalthe stage. Andofinstead of turning senior year may hold for awaits me is a wholly unpleasant fondly. It was aomen timefor of what great exploration that an impressive Venusaur or Charizard, me. My life at Cornell has been pretty I have into a SWUG. A and self-discovery. Coming from a city, surprise (like,transformed say, a menacing bug). swell, but I’m afraid that once I get to sweatpants-wearing, pizza-eating, Ithaca seemedthe soend spacious to here, me -alland As a first semester senior, I feel of my time that awaits anxious-about-the-future Senior my poor mother’s quickly became though the real world is approaching me isinbox a wholly unpleasant surprise as (like, Washed Up Girl. say, a menacing bug). flooded with pictures of the gorges that I faster and faster. Upon further reflection, couldn’t seem to get enough of. My high I find My that lifehere atis college, asone. I’ve finalmy stage a depressing As a first semester senior, I feel as school was also very small, so I loved known it, has flown right past me. At this With my vanishing youth and vibrancy, though the real world is approaching I have to find it within myself to look the fact that I could come across several very moment I am asking myself: Where faster and faster. Upon further towardsWhy the have future.I Though I find that my lifemy at college, new people in reflection, an instant. I cherished has mypositively youth gone? already my evolution was gradual, place as I’ve known it, has right found past four grey hairs atop mytaking right as a freshman to walk up flown to just head? And over the course of my four years here, it this very moment I am asking about anyone me. andAtintroduce myself, be if this feels is the case, then what’s next for like it may have been just as quick myself: Where has my youth gone? it in line for the at Goldwin backof on my freshman year the blink an eye. Whybathroom have I already found four me? grey Iaslook Smith or at thehairs communal It was a time of great exploration atop my watering head? Andhole if this isfondly. the And now I find myself in the asame case, then for me? known as “Nasties.” Sowhat’s whatnext happened and self-discovery. Coming from city, position as Jon Stewart post-Daily between then and now? When did I give Ithaca seemed so spacious to me - and I look back on my freshman year fondly. Show. What happens now? How long up on trying toIt complete the list of 161 my poor mother’s inbox quickly became was a time of great exploration and will this uneasiness last? Will we both things to do, and when did Coming I stop trying withit? pictures of the gorges that I Unfortunately, I just don’t self-discovery. from a flooded city, make Buttohere’s hoping that Ithaca seemed spacious to me couldn’t - and know. to make new friends? Only so one possible seem get enough of. we Mydo high and that the rest of our lives will be just my poor mother’s inbox quickly became explanation seems to exist. I, much like school was also very small, so I loved flooded with pictures of the gorges like cheesy, fresh, and untouched pizza. a Pokemon, have evolved into my final the fact that I could come across several stage. And instead of turning into an new people in an instant. I cherished my impressive Venusaur or Charizard, I have right as a freshman to walk up to just transformed into a SWUG. A sweatpants- about anyone and introduce myself, be wearing, pizza-eating, anxious-about- it in line for the bathroom at Goldwin the-future Senior Washed Up Girl. My Smith or at the communal watering hole final stage here is a depressing one. known as “Nasties.” So what happened With my vanishing youth and vibrancy, between then and now? When did I give I have to find it within myself to look up on trying to complete the list of 161 positively towards the future. Though my things to do, and when did I stop trying
tales of a
to make new friends? Only one possible explanation seems to exist. I, much like a Pokemon, have evolved into my final stage. And instead of turning into an impressive Venusaur or Charizard, I have transformed into a SWUG. A sweatpantswearing, pizza-eating, anxious-aboutthe-future Senior Washed Up Girl. My final stage here is a depressing one. With my vanishing youth and vibrancy, I have to find it within myself to look positively towards the future. Though my evolution was gradual, taking place over the course of my four years here, it feels like it may have been just as quick as the blink of an eye. And now I find myself in the same position as Jon Stewart postDaily Show. What happens now? How long will this uneasiness last? Will we both make it? Unfortunately, I just don’t know. But here’s hoping that we do - and that the rest of our lives will be just like cheesy, fresh, and untouched pizza. Just three weeks ago, I arrived at a crossroads in my life. My friends invited me out for a night of fun and I declined under the vague excuse of “needing to study.” Instead of painting Collegetown red, I ordered a thin crust pizza and began my Scandal binge. I was so enthralled with catching up on what I had missed that I hadn’t noticed what I was putting into my mouth. That is, until I finally looked down at the box and noticed a creepy critter crawling out from underneath the cheese of one of my slices. What had I done? How could I have inhaled that pizza and not have even noticed? This moment -- both harrowing and hysterical -- serves as an impossible omen for what senior year may hold for me. My life at Cornell has been pretty swell, but I’m afraid that once I get to the end of my time here, all that awaits me is a wholly unpleasant surprise (like, say, a menacing bug). As a first semester senior, I feel as though the real world is approaching faster and faster. Upon further reflection, I find that my life at college, as I’ve known it, has flown right past me. At this very moment I am asking myself: Where has my youth gone? Why have I already found four grey hairs atop my head? And if this is the case, then what’s next for me? I look back on my freshman year fondly. It was a time of great exploration and self-discovery. Coming from a city, Ithaca seemed so spacious 32 to me - and my poor mother’s inbox human interest quickly became flooded with pictures of the gorges that I couldn’t seem to get
SWUG