Volume XLIV - Issue 27

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THE

RECORD

VOLUME XLIV ISSUE 27 APRIL 25, 2014 THE MUSIC ISSUE

MUSIC

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THE RECORD I Made the Pilgrimage to Coachella VOLUME XLIV ISSUE 27 APRIL 25, 2014 Editor In Chief

Andrew Cammon ‘14

Layout Editor

Lucas McGartland ‘14

Content Editors

Michael Herman ‘14

William O’Brien ‘14

Eric Stange ‘14

Faculty Moderator

Ms. Layton

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Contact

theprioryrecord@gmail.com

314.434.3690 ext. 221

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The Record Disclaimer

The Record is the official student publication of Saint Louis Priory School in St. Louis, Missouri. It is produced by students/staff members. Its purpose is to inform students of events in the community; to encourage discussion of local, national, and international issues; and to serve as a training ground for budding journalists, photographers, and graphic designers. The Record accepts contributions from all members of the Priory community, including students, faculty, and alumni. The Record will not publish content considered legally unprotected speech, including but not limited to: libel, copyright infringement, unwarranted invasion of privacy, or material disruption of the educational process. Student editors apply professional standards to the production of the newspaper and are solely responsible for all content, both explicit and implicit. Letters to the Editors are always appreciated. Feedback not intended for publication is also welcome.

By Spencer Wright ’14 Staff Writer

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Take the coolest and nicest people in the country, put them in paradise, and have live shows from the musicians of our generation, and you have Coachella. It takes place in Indio, California, a two hour drive south of LA, and is the biggest music festival in the United States. I decided 6 months ago that I was going to take action on my dream of attending Coachella. I saved up, and me and John Yannakakis set out for the greatest trip of our lives.

We flew from St. Louis to LAX. Our first objective was to get a cab to get In N Out Burger which was only a couple miles away from the airport. In N Out is exclusively a west coast thing, so we had to see what it was like being an LA local.

Once we had our fair share of burgers and fries, we got on the shuttle for our two hour ride to Indio. coachella takes place on polo fields, which serve as the festival grounds for the weekend. Coachella takes plac in a desert, and it gets to about 90 degrees during the day and about 60 at night. We arrived at Coachella and began setting up camp. to truly experience the festival, you need to camp on the camp grounds, its a great way to meet new people and they off tons of fun things to do there all day and night if for some reason you don't want to spend your whole day at the festival. i was immediately taken aback by how beautiful it was there. Palm trees everywhere, with tons of huge statues and pieces of artwork everywhere around the grounds.

There were 6 venues there; 2 outdoor theaters, and 4 massive tents with stages in them. the backdrop to the stages looked like CGI, all you could see was blue sky and palm trees. the amount of amazing acts performing is almost overwhelming. One thing you need to understand about Coachella is that anybody who's anybody in music makes an appearance at the festival. Whether they were scheduled to perform, make a special guest appearance on stage, or just hanging out in the crowd, famous people are everywhere. You practically get

desensitized to it. Every morning I would wake up at around 7 or 8 and either get an avocado or breakfast burrito, followed by a much needed shower. Food vendors were at the camp grounds and festival grounds, and the food was always great. All the best restraints and food vendors from LA had food stations at Coachella. The gates to the festival opened at 11 am.

Our days were filled with jumping from concert to concert

The Rolling Stones, 'Exile on Main Street'

while meeting tons of fun new people on the way. At night is when the big headliners played.

Outkast performed Friday night and they killed it, especially considering they hadn't performed together in more than 7 years. Saturday night Nas performed his famous first album Illmatic all the way through, universally acclaimed as the best hip hop album of all time, exactly on the day twenty years ago when it was released. Sunday night Arcade Fire was nuts, they even brought out Daft Punk who rarely make appearances in the states. Besides the amazing performances every day, Coachella was awesome because of all the cool new people we met. After a long day at the festival, we would hangout with these college kids we had just met and talk to them for hours on end about their day and their experiences at Coachella. These people were complete strangers to us at the beginning but by the end of the weekend we all became really close friends.

Coachella is so amazing, everyone should at some point in their lives experience it. I miss hear good music all day, and being constantly sprayed by mist bottles while dancing in what is practically paradise. My final thought I will leave with you all is this; at first my parents said there was no way in hell that I could go. They said it was insane. But if you are really passionate about something like I was about Coachella, don't let worrysome parents deter you. Prove how responsible you are and do anything in your power to go, because it was easily the best time of my life and I hope some of you eventually get to have this same life changing experience.

R A N D OM

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Want To Hear My Favorites?

By Matt Ludwig ’14 Staff Writer

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Everyone has favorites—favorite games, favorite music, favorite clothes, favorite Record editor-in-chiefs (!), and favorite sports. Personally, I have my own favorites, and I’ll get to that in a matter of time depending on how quickly you read.

I promised this article would contain some reference to music. I like Jay-Z. He has a way with words. One might say he could sell ice to eskimos. He does have a way with words— stringing together entendres for days. Now, on to the good stuff.

I know a few people who have been begging me to mention them in an article. So, I’ll talk about some of their favorite

things. Charlie Rapp loves to play 2048, or in his case, 512 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ L i s t _ o f _ b u r n _ c e n t e rs_in_the_United_States). Tony Lee loves quarter-zips that are terrapin green. That’s a subtle distinction—terrapin. It’s not quite sea foam, but it certainly isn’t lime. My favorite domestic is, hands down, Eric Stange. It is my firm belief that he has found his true calling in life.

That is a fact.

On to a few more exciting topics, to which I have given considerable thought. We’ll start with my favorite biome.

The biomes will get you every time, just ask Mr. Wenger, or Jake Hill (read: Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake). My favorite biome is probably the rainforest. The trees of a tropi-

cal rainforest are so densely packed that rain falling on the canopy can take as long as 10 minutes to reach the ground (that is my second favorite fun fact). Just think about that. I know, it’s crazy!

My favorite victim of circumstance is Otto Porter. Unfortunately, this player with allstar talent is a victim of circumstance. He clearly fell two picks in the draft and landed in a less than optimum situation. He is behind more experienced players who have carved out their respective niches in this league.

And to top that, the head coach will only give playing time to veterans or overhyped backcourt players. Some birds aren’t meant to be caged, their feathers are just too bright. In fact, Otto has garnered the nickname

“yeast mode” because he rises to the occasion. And considering he has never lost a playoff game—a feat the greatest players of all time have not even accomplished (Patrick Ewing, Allen Iverson, and Michael Jordan in that order)—there should be no more doubters of his ability. (****The editors of the Record would like to say that these views are in no way shared by the Record, but by the rogue mind of Mr. Frat Studwig****) My favorite fun fact deals with AP courses. The AP Chemistry class has completed 22 chapters to the AP Biology’s 56 chapters. One of these classes has their work cut out for them this next week. Goodness!

TEAM+S #winning #teamwork #hashtag #donenow

By Andrew Cammon ‘14 Editor-in-Chief

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To all of you who have been holding your breath, I say to you: breath deeply. The TEAM +S results are in. After very many delays due to weather and other such circumstances, the powers that be have run bubbled sheets through machines and painstakingly graded beautifully written and contentdense multi-page essays.

As you all remember, the junior team placed second in Division 2 of the 11/12 level, the senior team placed first in Division 2 of the 11/12 level, and the freshman/sophomore team also placed first in Division 2 of the 9/10 level at the regional level. These results only took into account the first part of the two part TEAM+S evaluation. The first part of the

test is made up solely of multiple choice questions, while the second part is comprised of five essays.

The regionals only took into account the raw, part one scores. However, after the essays are graded, those scores are taken into account at the state level, adding a whole new dimension to the competition and shaking up t h e r a n kings.

Across the board, the scores from the essays greatly increased Priory teams’ rank. In Division 2 all teams retained their first place standing. But the more impressive and important standings are those all break down the high walls between divisions and turn the competition into an all-out

brawl.

In this “no divisons” ranking, schools were ranked both by their part one scores and by their combined (parts one and two scores). When only the part one scores were taken into account, the senior team placed 4th, the junior team placed 5th, and the sophomore 9/10 team placed 4th.

H o w e v e r, these numb e r s changed when the essays were taken into account.

The senior team rose to 2nd place and were only bested by a tough Clayton team. The sophomore 9/10 team rose to 3rd place. The junior team’s part two answers were not scored because they did not meet the 60 point threshold in part one. For essays to be

Marvin Gaye, 'What's Going On'

scored, a team needed a 60/80 or better on the part one section (the junior team missed this threshold by two points).

All of the teams and each participant did a great job at the competition. They have led Priory TEAM+S to victory once again this year. However this moment is bittersweet, because it is the last competition for, and I’m sure that I speak for everyone, a very disappointed senior team. This team has had a great run, proving themselves by besting all teams in the state during sophomore year and almost doing it again in their senior year.

But I am sure that there will be no void or mourning.

Inspired by the success of this year’s teams, I’m sure that TEAM+S will be inundated with volunteers next year, as always.

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PUZZLE S

  Sudokus: Easy, Medium, and Hard

Crossword Puzzle ACROSS

1. Storehouse

6. Chills and fever

10. Walk in water

14. Cognizant

15. Toot

16. Dwarf buffalo

17. Abhorrent

19. Clothing

20. Ring around the nipple

21. Directed

22. Border

23. Courtyards

25. Quarries

26. Gossip

30. Arch of the foot

32. Flag rope

35. A person who accumulates things

39. Pass by

40. Furrow

41. Anticipate

43. A grouping of

3. Head

4. Chocolate cookie

5. Electrical pioneer

6. "Eureka!"

7. Evil spirit

8. Let loose

9. Barely managed

10. Rainproof

11. Positive pole

12. Pooch

13. Relieves

18. Make lace

24. Disencumber

25. A type of necklace

26. Cook

27. Angel's headwear

28. Winglike

29. Typographer

31. Roman robe

DOWN

33. Test, as ore

1. Early 20th-century 34. Bobbin

art movement

36. Venician 2. Pitcher

magstrate

elements

44. Highly seasoned fatty sausage

46. Ward (off)

47. Englishman

50. Complete

53. Module

54. Letter after sigma

55. Origin

60. Iron oxide

61. Salvation

63. Algonquian Indian

64. Urgent request

65. Recorded

66. German for "Mister"

67. Slave

68. Outbuildings

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Priory Naps

The Beatles, 'Rubber Soul'

37. Not odd

38. Cleave

42. Palatable

43. Best seller

45. House cat

47. Stagger

48. Accustom

49. Cheapskate

51. American Sign Language

52. Lummoxes

54. Faucets

56. Salt Lake state

57. Fully developed

58. College girl

59. Terminates

62. Buffoon

FLUNK & TRAVEL

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Flunk!the Monk: Desalination Conference Pt. 1

By Fr. Ralph, OSB Monk

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‘What’s the scoop from Munich about the big DEE SALLY NATION Project?’

“It’s huge, Gloria, really huge!.

There’s a firm in Munich that’s devised a new way of desalinating water with solar energy.”

“Tell me more!” said Gloria .

They dropped into a pub ordered a ginger beer then put together a plan for a whole Congress on Desalination to take place in Cairo, Egypt in June of 2008. For lack of Record Space we are going to jump forward to the opening of the Congress itself , June 16 2008. For the previous six months both Flunk and Gloria had been involved in inviting speakers and then Heads of State to the week end Congress based on the fabulous breakthru in desalination that the firm in Munich, Germany had come up with. The list of potentates who were coming was impressive: Queen Elizabeth was going to pop in on her way with Philip to celebrate the 60th year of their marriage in the original Treetops where they had spent their honeymoon in Nairobi.

King Abdullah II was coming from Jordan. Bush was coming from the US and Presidentsemi-General Musharraf from Pakistan, President Shimon Peres was coming from Israel.

Sarkozy from France Angela

Merkel, the Chancellor, from Germany. Putin from Russia and Maliki from Iraq,Fassi from Morrocco and Belkhadem from Algeria and Benedict XVI from Rome.

Gordon Brown from the UK had insisted on bringing Kohler from Germany aand President Ben Ali was coming in from Tunisia. And, perhaps least expected and the one causing the most apprehension, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad from Iran. Once again Nelson Mandela from South Africa, now in his early nineties, had accepted the invitation to MC the event.

So we jump now to the very opening of the Congress.

Nelson Mandela has just been handed the mike by Deaconness Gloria Dorne.

Nelson: “Kings, Queens, Presidents, Chancellors,and all other Heads of State, I welcome you all warmly on behalf of our hosts Flunk the Flying Monk and Deaconness Gloria Dorne to whose inspiration and tireless activity we owe this great occasion. Let me say a word about procedure.

The object of our Congress is to launch a pilot project along the North African continent for the re-forestation and gradual reclaiming of the desert terrain in that region. First we will hear a word abut the technology that has made the project possible then we will have our regular

Flunk and Gloria Quiz and the first two Heads of State to complete the quiz correctly will be given the floor to describe their reaction to and ideas about the project. So may I introduce to you Herr President Horst Kohler of Germany to describe the breakthru in technology that has occurred in the last few years in Munich. Herr President please: Kohler: “Tank you, Nelson.

I speak bluntly.My scientist has made it possible to use sun power to remove salt from ocean water very fast in a kreis how you say kreis, circle of power never ending. Sea water pumped in here,Den dee sun rays evaporate dee water here and thru solar panel make power. Power drives pumps and collects salt free water and stores here ready for piping to area of reservoir or lake. Very simple Very... how you say... economical. Sehr praktisch how we say in Deutschland. All sun power driven. All pure water is finished product. Ready for humans consumption irrigation or odder uses. My scientist she amaze me. Best invention since nuclear bomb. I now ask President Mubarak who kindly host dees congress in Egypt to introduce our project.” President Mubarak takes the mike: Mubarak: “Thankyou, Horst. I see dees invention as the beginning of something very great. How many miles is

she from Marakesh in Morrocco to Cairo in Egypt? Well let us say 1896. Please to divide dees by 50. We will have every 40 miles along the coast of the North African continent a 150 acre plot of land that will hold major solar energy and desalination plants.

Dees water will be fed into pipelines that will travel underground two hundred miles into the deserts. At the end of each pipe line will be a reservoir.

Each of the plants will have an output of more than a million litres in twenty four hours. Our scientists have worked with Munich men all the details. We call dees project in Cairo the ELIN PRODIGY. She bring water from Mediterranean to water desert she reverse our Godgiven goddess NILE.” Nelson stepped forward and said: “Thankyou very much, President Mubarak. Now will you all please take out your pencils and complete Flunk’s Cairo Quiz that is on your table.

This quiz represents the transition between the salt-water environment, the freshwater environment and the reclaimed desert environment— the land flowing with milk and honey.

As you finish please pass it to the attendants who will bring it back to Mr Secretary General of UNO ‘s table where it will be corrected.

HOST FAMILIES NEEDED FOR THESE TWO STUDENTS FROM CHILE FROM AUGUST ‘14 TO FEBRUARY ’15.

• Please consider hosting one of these young men from Chile for all or part of their time at Priory.

• They’ll be studying here from August to the end of February 2014-15. If you’d like to help, please contact me ASAP. Thanks, Kevin O’Connell (ext. 122) koconnell@priory.org

• Hosting means welcoming them into the daily life of your family and providing them with parental supervision, transporting them to and from school and school functions. While they are here, they are regular Priory students. They are not on vacation. They will have homework, tests, quizzes, exams, papers, grades, sports etc. just like your own son and they will obey your every command too …just like your own son. I will support you every step of the way.

• By the way, their families have agreed to contribute $400/month to host families to help defray some of the expense.

• YOU DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE A SON WHO IS A FRESHMAN IN ORDER TO HOST, BUT IT HELPS.

Bob Dylan, 'Highway 61 Revisited'

SATIRE

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Ohn Jawgnew - Athlete Extraordinaire !

By William O’Brien ‘14 Content Editor

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Chaminade had Bradley Beal and David Lee (NBA players who are near all star level), CBC had Larry Hughes and Mike Shannon (another NBA player and Mr. Cardinal himself), SLUH had Ed Macauley and Pat McBride (Hall of Famers for the NBA and Soccer, respectively), but now Priory has someone to match these incredible athletes: Ohn Jagnew. Ohn looks like an athlete from the moment you lay eyes on him; with the physique of a Roman god and a face and personality to match it. He is currently leading the country in goals scored for lacrosse, and led the country in tackles in football (stats per OhnJagnewstatsnstuff.com.) In addition to his amazing accomplishments on the field, Ohn is also setting records in the lifting department. He reportedly benched ten Poods (roughly equivalent to 360 pounds for you uneducated), and squatted so much that he ran out of weights in the room. If you ever wish to watch Ohn in the weightroom, general admission tickets are only $10

and he only wears his posing shorts.

In order to get a vibe of how other students at Priory feel about Ohn Jagnew, I asked members of his class to describe how they felt about him.

Latrick Pane told me that, “His abs are so well chiseled that they remind me of hot dogs on a grill” (actual quote.) Peorge Galetta said, “He’s probably the biggest slayer I know.” Even the normally jealous Ole Cesperrago said that he thought Ohn, “Will probably go down as the best athlete in mankind, if only because of my debilitatingly painful shin injury I picked up that limited my ability.” By these quotes, it’s clear that Ohn commands the respect of his classmates, but I still wanted to get a better idea of who he was as a person. So in an attempt to boost my resume for a potential job opening at Michael Blogs Inc., I sat down with Ohn in an exclusive interview to try to figure out which sport he will go pro in and talk about his amazing body.

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Q: Now Ohn, it has been said that the multiple team in the NFL, NBA, and MLB are look-

ing into drafting you, despite the fact that you’ve never played basketball or baseball in high school. What is your reaction when all these teams from these different leagues want you, and do you have an idea of where you’ll end up?

A: Well I don’t really feel anything. I haven’t experienced emotion since around the seventh grade, when I hit some kid so hard it knocked the emotion out of both of us. But honestly, I’m used to being wanted.

Whether it’s rival athletes, girls, fraternities, or now professional sports teams, none of it is new to me.

Q: So with that in mind, what team do you think you will be joining?

A: Well after taking my time to think about it, I think I will be taking my talents to the Panamanian Power Lifters, a professional weight lifting team based in Panama. I know the South American Lifting League has yet to really take off in popularity, but I am confident that I can be the face of the league as it becomes a household name in the U.S. Q: Now some would say that is a waste of your talent to go to a

lesser league, how would you respond to these people?

A: The people who say this clearly don’t know anything of my actual plan. NFL eligibility rules state that I have to be two years removed from high school to be drafted, so by participating in two seasons of the South American Lifting League, I can continue to put on ludicrous amounts of muscle in order to become the #1 draft pick.

Q: Final Question Ohn: behind all the great athletes is a great coach, is there anyone in particular who has helped you reach your lofty goals?

A: I would definitely like to give a big shout out to the man himself Zac “Poelky Bear” Poelker, who taught me from a young age how to be ruthless on the field but loving and caring in the locker room. I was highly disappointed when I learned the Mr. Poelker would not be named to an administrative position at the school, as I thought he could do a terrific job forming youth such as myself to efficient killers on the field and in the classroom.

Awards Day Picks For The Year

By Eric Stange ‘14 Content Editor

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Ah yes, Awards Day. While this day comes at the chagrin of many, I surprisingly relish it.

And no, it is not because I reap in awards like $peez picks up Saturdays. I think it is per-preptually an event that defines a school like Priory. The ceremony is long, but we do have dozens among us (dozens!) who do deserve to be recognized.

The awards can most definitely

be better appropriated, however.

This does not mean that it should a pat on the back to all and green participant ribbons should be doled out. I simply mean that there are plenty of deserving students among us.

These awards are indeed not something to take lightly, as they are often something people aspire to earn so as to leave their mark on Priory. There are, even through all the equal opportunity and consideration, some snubs in the awards selec-

tion. The oddsmakers in Vegas, Monte Carlo, and the back rows know this better than anyone.

So, here are my snubs for this year.

Most Improved: Andrew Cammon If you’re not in agreement with me here, then I don’t know what to tell ya. Andrew has made decimal improvement, which is rare since the days of exponential growth have come and gone (see Gussie Busch’s (BS, JD, PhD University of

The Beatles, 'Revolver'

YoMaMa) theory of elephantal growth). When a gentleman receives an offer to Boston College, you know he has gotten his act together in past 12 months. I mean, come on! This time last year he was wearing womens’ tennis shoes!

Music: Matthew Ludwig This man is perhaps the most musically gifted since, AH, Ludwig van Beethoven! We all know of his talent of beating Otto Porter’s drum, singing the…continued on last page

MUSIC ! Kongos and Babymetal Bands:

By Austin Krueger ’14 Staff Writer

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As I sat down to write my music review for the week, I honestly didn’t know what to write about. I’ve been listening to a lot of new bands as of late, and it was tough to pick just a couple of songs. I eventually settled on a pair of artists that I have recently seen live. KONGOS is the first of these bands.

They are definitely a group that you need to know. Between increasing amounts of airplay and some commercials, KONGOS is becoming ever more prominent in the world of alternative rock. Their song Come With Me Now, off of their debut album Lunatic, is, if not their best song, definitely their most energetic. Most unusually, the song is driven by the accordion. Not many rock bands feature an accordion, but that is just what gives Come With Me Now its jumpy sound. Next I thought about a more recent

concert. Just a couple of weeks ago I saw King Washington at the Demo, and their song Land Without Age really struck me as a fantastic piece of music. The song is arranged beautifully, with the instruments complimenting the vocals at every turn. Rich vocal harmonies, a key component of the King Washington sound, bring Land Without Age to completion.

After the concert I talked to the band for a bit, and they are all really cool people (as I’m sure you could have guessed, seeing as they are musicians). To wrap up this week’s article, I have picked a very special band that I have not yet seen live, but I would very much like to. Unfortunately, I would have to travel all the way to Japan to see them, for the time being.

BABYMETAL is probably the most bizarre band out there, but that is what makes them truly unlike anything else I have ever listened to. They take two polar opposite genres and mash them

7 Editor’s Picks

together in what has been described as “an explosion of awesome.” Most people wouldn’t think that you could combine J-pop (Japanese pop) and death metal and get anything pleasant, but BABYMETAL has done it! A trio of J-pop singers, ages 16, 14, and 14 respectively, backed by a heavy metal band donning skeleton suits make for something…awesome?...I can’t even put it into words. I am not particularly a fan of metal or Jpop, but I really like BABYMETAL, so don’t let the genre dissuade you from listening. If you do deem yourself brave enough to check them out, start with Megitsune, Gimme Choco, and my personal favorite Ijime, Dame, Zetai.

If you give this infant genre a chance, I commend your openmindedness. All three tracks are featured on their eponymous debut album, which just came out in February. Thank you for reading.

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Who Knows Who Cares Local Natives

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What is a hipster? Who is a hipster? How can I become a hipster? You may be asking yourself these kinds of questions as you read about news from King Speezy’s trip to Coachella, the Meccah to which hipsters make their annual pilgrimage. According to the reliable source of Urban Dictionary, hipsters are, “a subculture of men and women that value independent thinking, counterculture, and indie-rock,” or just people who are often compared to hippies. Now you may be asking yourself how you can become one of these so called

hipsters. Just follow these simple rules.

1. Listen to hipster music.

This is the easiest way to be hipster. Bands such as the Local Natives, Tame Impala, Toro Y Moi, and Alt-J need to be on a constant shuffle in your music playlist. Mainstream music is a big no no, so delete any and every song you own that has been played on the radio. Oh and you like listening to z107.7? Not anymore.

2. Wear hipster clothes.

Totally changing your wardrobe is actually much easier than you would think. To do this, beginners usually head to local thrift shops like Goodwill,

or maybe take the high-class route and go to Urban Outfitters. A rule to shop by is to ask yourself, “Could I find this in my grandpa’s closet?” If yes, then it should be an automatic purchase.

3. Speak hipster lingo.

Phrases like, “I liked them before they were cool,” and “I donated to Haiti… before the disaster,” are easy ways to boost your hipster cred. Bragging about how you only listen to music on vinyl and how delicious your organic smoothie tasted are other good ways to do so. Follow these rules and you will be a hipster before you know it.

The Beach Boys, 'Pet Sounds'

Wonderin Why Aer

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She Tyler, The Creator

Like 5WeFeels Can Only Go Backwards Tame Impala

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6 Palace A$ap Rocky

How To Be Hipster (Just Like Me)

By Taylor Dubray ‘14

Marilyn Monroe Pharrell Williams

7 Cardiac Arrest Bad Suns

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14,400 Minutes Chance The Rapper

9 Arabella Arctic Monkeys

10 Sweet Ophelia Zella Day

N E WS

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Reminder That Track Still Exists

Calendar

By Daniel Martin ‘14 Staff Writer

Friday, April 25

Awards Day

Lunch: Fish and Chips

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With so many spring sports these days, it's easy to forget one of the original spring sports - Priory track. It falls through the cracks rather often, and is made up of a motley crew of Priory athletes that quite honestly don't look like they should be together. But they are, and bucking the trend of previous track teams, they are doing quite well. As a team, we are putting up great numbers

against many established programs and schools in many events.

Granted, some help from Dan Watson and Drew Callaghan does add some points, but Priory runners and throwers are taking home plenty of medals. Believe it or not, we excel at relay events, for whatever reason. Just ask Griffin Meert, considering he's an integral team member in a few of them. Matt Kovac is busy flying over the high jump bar, and at least one of the O'Sullivans is out running an event at

any given time. If you can tell the difference. Point is though that Priory track is on the up and up.

Many runners and jumpers are posting some of the best stats of their careers. With a league meet this Friday, they have a reasonable chance of taking the upset over fantastic league track teams. It will be interesting to see how Priory track will perform under pressure, and how they will continue to grow and improve into a formidable track team. Watch out.

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The Varsity tennis team is off to an explosive start this season.

At the beginning of the second half of the season, the team boasts a 5 and 1 record, with its most recent victory coming against Lutheran South, an impressive 9-0 shutout. The only blemish on the Rebelsʼ 2014 record came at the hands of John Burroughs, a 2013 Class 1 State finalist, on a blustery evening several Fridays ago.

Last week, Priory visited Westminster for three straight days to compete in the Metro

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Sunday, April 27

4:00PM V Lacrosse vs. Brother Rice

4:15PM V Baseball @ Ladue

5:30PM JV Lacrosse vs. Brother Rice

Monday, April 28

Lunch: Pork Loin

General Tso’s Chicken

League Tournament, which features 8 flights of singles and 4 flights of doubles. The first two days of the tournament consist of qualifying matches.

If successful, players compete on Thursday in the championship and third place matches.

Despite playing without several of the top players due to traveling or sickness, all of Prioryʼs entrants qualified for Thursday.

Everyone played for third place except 4 doubles team, Will OʼBrien and Adam Ezzelgot, who competed in the championship match of the 4 doubles flight. Priory tied Westminster for overall third in the tourna-

ment. The team looks forward to next Monday, when it will play Westminster again in a dual.

Although it has just begun, the tennis season is already entering its final weeks. Priory hosts CBC on Friday, travels to play Westminster and MICDS next Monday and Wednesday respectively, and wraps up the season with three matches in early May against Whitfield, Principia, and Desmet. Districts begin the week of May 12th.

Remember: Priory. April 30th. 5:00. Be there or be square.

thinkers of his generation, you’re going to start hearing Thomas Aquinas and Carlo Herbosa in the same sentence before you know it. Carlo’s dogmatic stances are renowned, as Paul Deschler relayed one of his stirring speeches at a Steubenville retreat to me. It is well known that Fr. Augustine

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4:00PM V Tennis @ Westminister

Tuesday, April 29

Lunch: BBQ Chicken

Pasta con Broccoli

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3:30PM V Golf v. MICDS @ St. Albans

Wednesday, April 30

Lunch: Pot Roast

Enchiladas

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3:30PM V Golf v. John Burroughs @ St. Albans

4:00PM V Tennis @ MICDS

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Thursday, May 1

Senior Spirit Day

Lunch: Kielbasa

Burgers

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4:00PM V Ultimate v. SLU

7:00PM Spring Play

Awards Day, from pg. 6 …Knicks’ praises (what for?), and of course, the finger cymbals. However, he is most talented with the trombone. His skills with that as well as the thin flute are quite spectacular.

He can exhibit his skills anytime you want for a small fee.

Theology: Carlo Herbosa One of the most profound

3:45PM Track - Metro League Tourney

4:00PM V Tennis v. CBC

4:15PM JV Baseball @ MICDS

Saturday, April 26

11:00AM V Baseball v. MICDS

6:30PM Junior/Senior Prom

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Tennis Update

By Jarret Lowell ’14 Staff Writer

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has been quoted as saying “Carlo keeps me going. Now I bet my life that Carlo is right!”

Coaches Cup: Jack Herr What else could you ask for in a role player? This guy should have been a runaway winner, and I’m already tired of talking about it.

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The Beatles, 'Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band'

Friday, May 2

Lunch: Lasagna

Tilapia

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4:00PM V Tennis v. Whitfield

7:00PM Spring Play