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CHRISTOPHER W. CARROL + GALLERY 5 + JESUS + HOLLY LESTER + WAN NA SEE MORE?? + THE MACCARTER + THINGS YOU DIDN

AIRS DESK + ONE PERSON RALLY DISPATCHES FROM THE CINEMA AFF FRED PINKARD + KATIE DAVIS + RYAN MCLENNA N + THE INTERNATIONA L GENTLEMAN

A QUICK REFERENCE CITY GUIDE + A CRITIC始S CRITICAL CRITIQ

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Revenge & Androids , on persons with no passion.

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ps e cdRs t e s p ect Respect

issue one april 15th, 2005

my M E T R O photography Parker / R.Anthony Harris / Alyssa / Todd Raviotta

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RVA MAGAZINE

RESPECT, REVENGE, & ANDROIDS ISSUE ONE / YEAR ONE / APRIL 05 PUBLISHER

Eddie Wilson web

R. Anthony Harris

ART DIRECTOR Parker

WRITERS

art Parker Justin Adler film Kevin Gallagher Matt Goins Ted Blanks music John Taylor Paul Seahorse local M. Dulin Justin Adly Tess Dixon Laura Ann Brian Carter

DESIGNERS

R. Anthony Harris Jason Hundley city directory Ollie Cortum promotional

DISTRIBUTION

Steve Warrick Urban Fable Andre Shank Judith Supine

If your business or establishment would like to carry RVA magazine contact tel: 804.349.5890 eml: distribution@rvamag.com

PHOTOGRAPHERS

SUBMISSIONS

ILLUSTRATORS

Kim Frost Holly Lester Parker Alyssa A Todd Raviotta Jonathan Ebbert Keith Browne

CONTACT

Inkwell Studio 3512 Floyd Ave. Apt. 1 Richmond, VA 23221 tony@rvamag.com www.rvamag.com

ADVERTISING

For all local and national advertising inquiries contact tel: 804.349.5890 eml: advertising@rvamag.com

RVA welcomes submissions but cannot be held responsible for unsolicited material. Please send all to submissions to content@rvamag.com HEADS UP. The advertising and articles appearing within this publication reflect the opinion and attitudes of their respective authors and not necessarily those of the publisher or editors. Reproduction in whole or part without prior written permission from the publishers is strictly prohibited.

RVA Magazine is published monthly and is $5.00 USD. All material within this magazine is protected.

RVA is a registered trademark of the Inkwell Studio L.L.C. Thank you.

RVA

/ CONTENTS

GALLERY My Metro ART 12 Pick & Choose 14 Wanna See More??

22 Interview / Amanda & Gallery 5 24 Interview / Holly Lester 30 Critique / VCU Dance

FILM 43 /Horoscopes 32 Commentary “Dispatches 34 Review / Horror / “Martin” 36 Commentary / DVD / “The Passion” MUSIC 38 Interview / EyeCue 40 Hortus Self Promo 41 Contagious / Expose LOCAL 42 Poem / Richmond 44 Commentary / “One Person Rally” 46 Informative / Knitting 48 Commentary / “Chronic Licking...”

50 Commentary / “Come, Fall in Love...”

THE FAN TO CHURCH HILL LISTINGS 54 For April / Restaurants, Richmond Indy Radio Schedule In future issues the listing will be expanded to include: Movie theatres, playhouses, video rental, more restaurants, yoga, galleries, video equipment rental, Mac & PC computer repair, bike shops, boutiques, tourist spots, bookstores, club, martial arts, acupuncture, public libraries, tourist spots, tattoo shops, print shops, U of R Radio, VCU Radio, massage parlors, salons & Plant Zero.

THE BACK PAGES 60 Urban Fable 62 Savage Love

ARTs

e

Pick & Choos

Every Month we go out on the First Friday Artwalk and pick one piece. This piece would be ours if we could afford to buy it.

For February

“Untitled” Christopher W. Carrol 12’ tall x 18’ (?) wide $1000

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Fred Pinckard / Untitled / watercolor, ink on paper / fred@salvationgallery.com

Katie Davis / Shine / woodcut / katie@salvationgallery.com

A sneak peak of the creative work being produced throughout our city.

Possible interviews for the future??

Wanna See More ??

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Ryan M. McLennan / Untitled / enamel on canvas / ryan_mclennan@hotmail.com

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Judith Supine / Untitled / paper cutout / www.flickr.com/photos/judithsupine

Lucas / Untitled / photography RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 17

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Lauren Vincelli / Octopus / hemloxx@yahoo.com

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Brien White / Saigon Buddha / oil on canvas / lycobra@hotmail.com

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Kim Frost / High Art / oil on canvas / frostphotography@comcast.net

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Chris Milk / ukeladyooh / oil on canvas / humilk@yahoo.com

Brian Nozynski / Untitled / mrnozynski@comcast.net

THE BIRTH OF A GALLERY / Parker Amanda Robinson is a woman on a mission. She wants to change how you experience a gallery situation. She wants to expose you to new art and music in an environment where creative minds can gather, exchange ideas, and have fun at the same time. To begin her mission she is opening the doors to The Virginia Fire & Police Museum / Gallery 5. This enormous structure (formally known as Steamer Company No. 5) has been in her family for close to a century and both her grandfather and great grandfather served as fire fighters here. The building is the oldest standing firehouse in the state of Virginia, built in 1849 it was one of few structures to survive the Civil War in Richmond. It was used as both a firehouse and 19th century police station. It still has the original horse drawn steam engine, man drawn hose carts, police motorcycles, fire poles, jail cells, hanging gallows, uniforms, and thousands of various antiques.

The museum part will be revived, however Amanda has decided to focus on the arts, and reopen its doors as “Gallery 5”. Because of the buildings 19th Century architecture, design, and its traditional firehouse feel, it will be one of the most unique gallery settings around Richmond. “I envision this building to be an art center to showcase a different world of art, a place with an ever changing soundtrack. I want this gallery to encompass everything I feel so many Richmond artists are looking for. I want it to be different, the art, the music, the whole feel. There are so many unique and amazing artists in the Richmond area, that don’t have the right environment to showcase their breed of work.”

Don’t expect to walk in and see generic Thomas Kinkaid types of work or boring still life pieces. “I want the underground art of Richmond, the risqué work people are intimidated by. I want the dirty, the witty, the ever changing, the respected, the disrespected, the opinionated, the diverse, the unwilling, the unintentional, and the beautiful work of Richmond.”

Being a visual artist herself and graduating from Savannah College of Art and Design, Amanda has since won several congressional, state, and national art competitions and has had her work exhibited in numerous galleries and exhibitions around the D.C. area. She also had her own successful independent clothing company called Vigilantics in which she and a partner designed and printed all of their own merchandise. Before taking on the Gallery 5 project, she gave the company and all of its royalties to her business partner to focus solely on her new endeavor. “I began to feel that the arts and my painting career held higher importance than anything else in my life. The company was successful, however it wasn’t my dream and I needed more. I made my mind up, jumped a plane, came home, and decided to give Richmond and its possible opportunities another chance. I knew one great opportunity that was impossible to fail, the resurrection of the firehouse.”

It will be resurrected in a big way. Every First Friday, Gallery 5 will spotlight new art, musical acts, as well as various performing art groups.

It has more than enough space for visual arts, multi-media and video art installations, puppet house productions, and lit showcase space for sculpture, jewelry, photography, and other small works of art. Gallery 5 will have its own in-kitchen coffee bar and lounge. Gallery 5 would also like to have monthly guest speakers on Saturday afternoons, art classes, and tutoring available.

“I would like to see this as one of Richmond’s top art centers. There is so much potential in this one building, but we will need the support of Richmond and artist community to make its dreams a reality.”

Gallery 5 is located in Jackson Ward at 200 W. Marshall Street, directly across the street from the Richmond Dairy Apartments, and only a block over from the beginning of the “First Friday Art Walk.” Hours are Tuesday -Saturday 10:00 to 4:00 except exhibition nights other times by appointment only. vfpmgallery5@verizon.net / 804.644.0005 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 23

Soy Sauce, Sweat, and Tears / Parker / Holly Lester To have a conversation with Holly Lester is like being in a comedy 101 class called “Holly Lester’s Guide to Life”. It’s always a learning experience with a smile. She often brings up new perspectives on the little things, as well as being very receptive to how you view the world.

The gears in her head are constantly turning.

She has got her hands full. Besides finishing up her BFA in Sculpture and Extended Media at VCU, she is also a elementary grade literacy tutor/mentor.

Though her provocative and humor tinged artwork is mainly focused on installation, video, performance, time-based media, she has also worked in 2D within lithographs, Giclee prints, etchings, and ink.

She has participated in the annual “Wearable Art” fashion show for three years in a row, winning “Best in Show” in 2003 with her now “famous” kimono made from 2000 soy sauce packets. The following year she won best in her category with “Are You Looking At My Teddies?”- a hyper sexy piece made from various stuffed animals. Her art will be featured in a new book, “Lux Artillery” by Zora Von Burden.

I sat down to chat with Holly about her artwork, “Lux Artillery,” being a creative thinker, and how she receives inspiration from working with kids.

be true for me if I was in high school today, ‘cuz my parents don’t have a good internet connection even now, so maybe it’s the same old class envy.

Whatever. The point is that most high schoolers are cooler than me any day of the week.

What piece got the most feedback or caused the biggest reaction?

“2 Songs That Make Me Cry”, a video where I documented my tears in response to two Blackalicious songs, “Making Progress” and “Sleep”, with (their) themes of liberation struggles. It has gotten a lot of feedback, mostly good, but I was glad that some people weren’t into it. I can trust the positive feedback more if I hear negative feedback. It validates the positive.

Describe where your current interests lie when coming up with an idea for a piece?

Most of the time, it’s when I’m chillin’ wit’ my homies, and someone is talking about something that happened, that’s funny or sad or emotive somehow, and I think, there needs to be documentation of this, or an acknowledgement of the process that someone is going through. I’m kind of amazed by how there are all these little life lessons that me n’ my peeps have been going through that were never the subject of any after-school specials but a lot of them are informed by our particular moment in the contemporary world, too; the way that our culture has changed, so we’re having to deal with issues now that maybe previous generations didn’t. I get so jealous of some high school age kids now, it seems like they have so much more than I did at their age -- that sounds like such a crotchety old person thing to say -- what I mean is, for example, growing up with the internet as a staple in one’s life of course, that probably still wouldn’t

Also, the love letters piece, I found an old envelope of love letters, from lots of different old boyfriends and lovers, and scanned then into Photoshop and made Giclee prints of them onto watercolor paper.

The letters were already artifacts to me, but I hoped to put them into a format that would make them artifacts to others too, by following certain gallery conventions. One of the highlights is a love sonnet one of my old boyfriends wrote for me in Elizabethan English. It makes people laugh out loud. A few of the letters still sincerely affect me, positively, but the bulk are reminders of obsession, manipulation, and pathos. Some people thought it was tacky and brutal, (it was kinda supposed to be) but I also had people coming up to me after reading some of the letters (there is also an interrogation of the typical ideas of love in this piece) and really relating, thanking me that I had broken down some illusions for them.

I always worry that my work speaks more to women than it does to men, but this piece felt like it walked the gender divide pretty well; women see it as empowering, and guys seem to laugh at the content. I’ve been very fortunate to feel like I’ve never had to look too hard for an audience.

Also, I’m not big on shocking people. I like a more steadily-paced regular fucking with, people that fuck with each other tend to stay friends the RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 25

longest. Being mean is fun!! So I want my pieces to lightly fuck with people, so this weird discomfort stays with the viewer for a while.

How did the whole book thing happen?

Zora was one of the strangers; I think her first message was “this is really interesting stuff” and I had been meaning to write her back, but hadn’t gotten to it yet, and because myspace is on cybertime, the next time I checked my messages, she had written, “seriously” in the subject line, and then said that she wanted to include me in a book she was writing about female performance artists. I had no idea that my favorite luminaries were in on it, I was just stoked at the prospect of being in a book! Then the next message was logistical stuff for the interview, and she said something at the end like, “I’m still waiting for Kembra’s interview, et cetera, et cetera.”

So I wrote her back, “by Kembra, I’m assuming that you can only mean Kembra Pfahler of the Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black?!” and proceeded gushing shamelessly. Then when she wrote me back again, she mentioned all my other faves: Slymenstra Hymen of GWAR, Marina Abramovic, Gen from the Genitorturers, and LYDIA freakin’ LUNCH! What’s it like being in a book with some of your idols?

I guess I don’t officially know yet; right now, I’m only on a website with them, and that’s good enough for me.

I’m listed as Holly L., which is kind of funny. My name’s not listed on the main page, you have to look under “Images” to find me. The main page has all the stars listed along the side, and I’m included under the “and many more”! Ha ha! I’m just blown away that Zora liked my work, and I’ve gotten to have good dialogue with her,. She liked the way the interview went, she called me “brilliant.” *squeal!/sigh!/blush!/flutter!*...and she’s been so flattering every time I talk to her, anyway. It never hurts to have another positive, encouraging voice in your life!

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So I want my pieces to lightly fuck with people. - Holly

God bless myspace.com! At first, I honestly felt a little silly creating profiles for Myspace, and I’m still trying to get a website together, but I figured I should put images of my work on myspace, instead of just all the pictures I look hottest in. Plus, I had a lot of friends who kept asking to see my work, who happened to be on myspace, so it made sense and then, lo and behold, total strangers started writing to me about my work!

What’s the most satisfying aspect of working with 2nd graders?

I don’t know where to start my kids are ridiculously wonderful! I heard all these horror stories from second year members about how we were going to see signs of child abuse and neglect, and behavior problems that were rooted in these problems, that the harsh reality might be too much for me to handle, even though most of us haven’t had the easiest lives but when I got to the school that first day, it was smiles and warmth and positivity all around, at least as far as the kids were concerned. I love the bad kids. I have a special place in my heart for the little angel lambs, too, who never do anything wrong, ‘cuz I was a do-gooder goody-goody two-shoes when I was little, I wasn’t prissy though). But the bad kids are usually the class clowns and there’s way more than one in my classroom. I actually do get annoyed at them sometimes now, but it was such a novelty at first that I kept having to run out to the hallway so they wouldn’t see me cracking up, and thus

reinforcing their disobedience. Also, I don’t want to crack down too hard on them being kids and I love seeing them think for themselves, though this is just as likely with the angel lamb kids as with the clowns. But I’ve definitely had to revert to acting more like a traditional disciplinarian than I’d hoped.

I find myself saying and doing things I swore I never would like, “You’ll do it because I said so!”, “It’s for your own good!”, and “Adults are talking, you need to be quiet!”

There’s one student especially that is a beautiful artist; he still draws from the right side of his brain, he’s one of the angel lambs, and he has these big eyes that just stare and stare. Some of them are just so imaginative; so that’s very inspirational. And I swear it’s different, somehow, than them just doing “cute” things. They are definitely cute, but certain things that happen are just fascinating! I feel like I should contexture this with certain things in mind.

I’m not big on kids, I’m only big on my kids at the school. And only certain ones within that group, too. I don’t want kids of my own, I’m not one of those jackasses that thinks everything their snot nosed brat does is the smartest, cutest, funniest thing ever. I know what it is! It’s just *surreal* as all get-out. I end up laughing at myself a lot, laughing with the kids a lot, and laughing at them, too. Me and Ms. Queen make fun of them, which is supposed to be wrong and bad, but every child isn’t a prodigy but I do believe that every child can be taught.

Everything about the elementary school environment is funny to me; it was weird to go back to drawing posters with markers. I actually want to do a thing where I try to “master” markers, and expose some of my best and brightest to *gulp* critical theory and give them access to more traditional Fine Arts materials, like oil paints, and watercolor paper, then watch where they go with it. I know I’m not the first Fine Arts major to end up in my position, and I know of other artists that have gone down these roads, but I’m still madly curious to see what could happen. I also want to videotape some of their antics, and hopefully it will end up looking like more than just RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 27

another episode of “Kids Say the Darnedest Things” or “America’s Funniest Home Videos.”

The most satisfying aspect of working with 2nd graders? That they’re not mine! That they go home at the end of the day! It’s not sunshine and roses every day. There has also been some heavy shit that’s gone down. But I feel like they teach me more than I teach them, and that I’m gaining so much, it’s overwhelming sometimes. It’s just such cacophony and chaos there that sometimes the part of the day I love most is coming home to a mostly quiet apartment. I also got so fed up dealing with pathetic, immature adults at other jobs that it’s nice to be around people that actually are 7 years old, instead of just acting like 7 year olds.

What projects are you currently working on or planning to work on?

Right now I’m collaborating with my lady friend Cindy Breckenridge on a couple of stop-motion animation projects; one where my dirty laundry attacks me, and something else with food. We helped Ms. Diane Derr with one of her latest video pieces involving tootsie pops. We have another in mind that involves my inflatable motorcycle Halloween costume, the Hess station on a Saturday night, rollerskates, and hot babes.

Then my evil plan to shit outside in every state in our fine nation.

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/ Ollie Cortum

.

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)

FILM

Dispatches from the Cinema Affairs Desk / Kevin Gallagher / Todd Raviotta There is an incredible amount of pain and shame that follows the unsuccessful attempt of a film project. A failed painting can be relegated to the back of a portfolio with little time and energy wasted other than your own. Film, on the other hand, is not an isolationist’s art. Most films are collaborative to some degree. You must place your trust in a handful of crafts persons to deliver your vision unto you. Cinematographers, Art Directors and Sound Engineers must all be convinced that your picture is worth their time and creative efforts. You can do a lot of this stuff yourself but even the most hermetic filmmaker must rely on the technician at a trusted film lab for support. You will always have wasted someone else’s effort by not completing the picture.

As a result, your inability to finish the task will not be a private wake for a creative tangent gone awry. Every lackey and hanger-on who heard about the film will come around to inquire as to what it was that went wrong, this time, so to speak, exactly, per se... There is no kind of failure like public failure.

There is the theory that if you hype your project enough, even in the earliest stages of pre-production, your film will start gaining enough momentum that it will take on a life of its own. The masses will flock to your brilliant story and toil to no end to raise its form out of the magical ether of the conceptual.

This is bullshit. The hardest thing is to make someone give a damn about what you are doing and just because you manage to accomplish that magnificent feat doesn’t mean that it won’t start crashing around you. Watch “Lost in La Mancha.” It is never too late to fail.

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Living in constant fear of this kind of scenario has caused me to be especially guarded with the film I am presently developing. What makes it even more interesting is that I am going to commit a series of public articles discussing the process I am going through. I am remaining vague out of trepidation.

The more esoteric my language, the greater my fear. If I become incomprehensible you are sure to find me in some stranger’s dark closet with my fists clutching shredded pieces of celluloid while jabbing wildly into the air, shrieking madly about the crippling effect of some mid-seventies existential road movie by Godard.

However, going quasi-public does provide me a certain out just in case the film falls apart. These articles can become the saving grace of the situation and their chronicling of the impending chaos will be my behind the scenes featurette for the DVD that will never be. My next posting will be from the front lines of the shooting process and will include more detail. Or it will feature an amusing tale of how instantaneously the film came to a halt over some obscure detail sending a year and a half of my life down the commode.

Let’s keep the expectations low.

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 33

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director / George A. Romero actors / John Amplas, Lincoln Maazel, Christine Forrest, Tom Savini R Runtime: 94 min DVD distributor: Anchor Bay Entertainment INT. DARK PARLOR. NIGHT The curtains open to reveal a dark parlor. A handsome young man, KIRCHFELD, pours himself a scotch and water from a well stocked bar. The parlor is cluttered with books and other antiquities. Gargoyles peer inquisitively over the topshelves. We see Kirchfeld adjust a diamond studded pinky ring as the sound of a cheap motorized wheelchair intrudes violently into the calm of the parlor. It is MR. PICKLES, a ninety year old man with a ceaseless wheeze in his voice.

KIRCHFELD Something to drink, Pickles?

Kirchfeld smirks, rubbing his hand over his immaculate, shorn head. He gives his goatee a soft tug and turns to face Mr. Pickles.

MR. PICKLES That’s “Mister” to you, jackass.

And no, you know I can’t anymore.

KIRCHFELD Right. Did you enjoy the film?

KIRCHFELD Pickles!

Mr. Pickles stops across from Kirchfeld, and holds the tube from his oxygen tank tightly.

Mr. Pickles jerks himself awake.

MR. PICKLES (wheezing) Stinks like snapper.

MR. PICKLES Vampire! Humpf, he ain’t even got fangs.

We see Mr. Pickles pull out a DVD copy of George A. Romero’s Martin from beneath his withered legs. Kirchfeld grabs the DVD from him with a huff.

KIRCHFELD Yes! That’s the beauty of it!

We’re never certain. He feeds via needles and razors. More fodder for a behavioral science unit than Bram Stoker.

KIRCHFELD Fool! You wouldn’t know good cinema if it crawled up you ass and bit your prostate. This is one of Romero’s best films!

Mr. Pickles crosses his arms. The oxygen tube across his withered face is stained with snot.

Kirchfeld throws his arms around wildly, like a whirling dervish.

MR. PICKLES (wheezing heavily) Well, I liked the old guy.

Now, that’s a good actor.

KIRCHFELD (con’t) This work is a careful and intent character study. And, I mean, using realism to tell a vampire story...c’mon.

KIRCHFELD Tata Cuda. Played by Lincoln Maazel. I believe it’s his only film appearance.

We see Mr. Pickles slouched, snoring in his wheelchair

MR. PICKLES Who cares?

Kirchfeld rolls his eyes, clearly annoyed with the old man’s flippancy.

KIRCHFELD Did you find that the radio show confessional was an insightful subtext?

Mr. Pickles looks up at Kirchfeld, confused and wiping drool off his chin.

KIRCHFELD You’re repulsive.

MR. PICKLES Ahh...blow it out yourKirchfeld stands up abruptly and turns to face the CAMERA. KIRCHFELD One for the discerning horror fan. A creepy and atmospheric Indie classic. Great story, acting, and cinematography, topped off with Romero’s signature Realism. A must see.

We see the old man shaking his head in feeble defiance.

MR. PICKLES You wouldn’t know creepy from an ice cream truck.

The camera pulls back as we see the two men continue to argue. The curtains close.

FADE TO BLACK

Circumcise Me: “Passion of the Christ” Just Got Cut / Ted Blanks Mel Gibson is rereleasing his “Passion of the Christ” as “The Passion Recut” just in time for Easter this year. At first glance, this new title connotes a longer, more expansive version of the film for those who didn’t get enough Christ-beating the first time around. Perplexedly, though, seven minutes have been cut from it.

If Gibson had more balls, he’d have removed all seven minutes of flashbacks from Jesus’ pre-Passion life and made the movie straight up gore. But, as he says, “Some of you actually said that you wish you could have taken your Aunt Martha, Uncle Harry or your grandmother or some of your older kids. So I listened to that and it inspired me to recut the film.” So gone from the movie are the most brutal scenes, keeping Auntie Martha from having a fifth heart attack halfway through the second act.

Even the ads for the film display this Gibson quote : “By softening some of its more wrenching aspects, I hope to make my film and its message of love available to a wider audience.” In other words: “Fuck artistic integrity and my original intentions, I want to make even more money from this thing!”

Okay, okay, I’ll lay off a little. There’s nothing novel or entertaining about us from the secular world bashing this movie - It’s Jerry Falwell’s favorite, and there’s nothing we can do about that. And I’ll be honest - I haven’t seen it since it’s first run anyway.

Here’s what I remember about “The Passion”: The cinematography was impressive and the filmmaking solid. Jesus looked way whiter and hotter than he should’ve, given Mel’s assertion that his movie was totally realistic. The music was loud and consistently obnoxious. There was a questionable Satan figure that looked like something out of a Marilyn Manson video. There was so much beating and 36 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

bleeding that the whole thing got sort of boring after a while. And regarding the film’s main controversy, I thought it was no more anti-semitic than the source material.

The overall critical opinion “The Passion” is as sharply divided as the American public’s, as a quick search on rotten tomatoes.com turns up a 51% fresh rating. So who knows whether this movie is good or not. I didn’t like it, but that’s not really the point I’m trying to make.

Since you are reading this a few weeks after Easter, this all may seem less than topical. But my question is this: Are we going to have to live with this movie taking up miles of screen space every time a Holy Week comes along? The DVD hit stores just 6 months ago, which means a disc of the “Recut” in 6 more, and then 6 later a new version for next Easter, and so on.

If we are going to have ghosts of Jesus-movies past haunting us each Easter, why not a rerelease of Scorcese’s “Last Temptation of Christ,” which actually deals with Jesus as a human, or even “Jesus Christ Superstar,” a movie that’s not afraid to say that if Jesus were alive in the 60’s, he’d probably be a dirty hippy. Either is better than “The Passion,” a movie that, for all its controversy, doesn’t say anything particularly controversial. Sure, Christ suffered, but not so we could re-live that suffering through a depressing and cruel film that tells us nothing about what all that suffering was for.

The Passion Recut 2005 Newmarket / Icon 120 minutes

MUSIC

A Sit Down w/ EYECUE aka Drew Snyder / John Taylor I was first introduced to Drew amidst the throngs of dancing people you’ll find in Godfrey’s on the 1st and 3rd Friday of every month. His skills at keeping the turntables spinning and keeping the people dancing have turned a bar better known for it’s “Tranny Brunch,” into a pretty happening dance club. Here’s some excerpts of a recent chat we had.

JT How long have you been doing the Godfrey’s thing?

D I took it over, these guys Ross and Christopher used to do it, and they moved to LA. I was working at the record store and had filled in for them a couple of times, and that was a little over 2 years ago. When I took it over there wasn’t really a lot of people showing up for it anymore, they had turned it into a weekly thing, which was kinda overkill, so we took it back to a bi-weekly thing just because of the amount of events. A weekly thing here, unless it’s almost completely free, it’s hard to get enough interest built up. There are too many other things going on too, with bands and whatnot.

JT There seems to always be a crowd.

D Yeah, we always get a decent crowd. There have been some nights where we’ve gotten over 250 people and there’s been a line out front.

Which is cool, I like it, but people will start leaving because it’s too crowded. No one can dance, so it’s almost ridiculous.

JT How do you choose the music that you play?

D It’s weird; I try to mix everything up a little bit. It’s kinda a little that everybody can get into, and maybe I can turn someone on to something new, which is what I’m really into. But you always have people at the shows that want to hear something else. A lot of people will show up just wanting to hear 80s, a lot of people will show up just wanting to hear hip hop. There’s a lot of cool new things going on, electro stuff, new rock.

There’s stuff that I can play in DC that people will go nuts over but here

38 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

it gets a mute response; followed by someone asking me to play an 80s song or Britney Spears. That’s cool, people like to dance to it but I don’t like to play that stuff all night. I’ll play new stuff and old stuff just to try to keep everybody dancing.

JT How do you prepare for a show?

D Planning, a lot of planning. I try and bring enough of the records people are going to ask for, but I throw in standards I guess, records that I know everyone will dance to. I try to keep the energy up, working in slower songs requests during a set of upbeat songs is tough. I hope people will like it, but there are always people who want to hear what they want to hear, not very open to new music I guess.

JT What are the other gigs that you have done on a regular / semi- regular basis?

D Me and Marty Key used to do punk night at Nancy Raygun, show up and play our punk records, and every now and again I’d do random stuff with him at Ipanema.Then, for about a year I did “Electro-Tease” up in DC until they stopped doing that. Now it’s just odds and ends and Godfrey’s and that’s pretty much all.

JT You ever catch other DJ’s?

D I’m pretty busy usually, I don’t get out much. Other than Cam from Hit/Play and his radio show, and the Chris Bopst show. I catch the Richmatic shows every now and again. That’s a really cool night but most of the DJ’s that I know really well from here have moved either to NY or LA.

JT Do you see the Richmond DJ scene expanding or contracting?

D I think expanding. With Richmatic, Slow Education Dance Parties, Hyperlink had a night. Not as much as other cities, but I think that it is getting bigger. I think a lot more people will get into it as more and more genre lines blur. Take the Rapture for example, they are a rock band playing dance music, and it works. That will lead to a place where people will be a lot more accepting of electronic music. And even your electronic acts are using a lot more instruments. Output Records, DFA Records, people who wouldn’t listen to that stuff before are finding themselves listening to it a lot. It’s becoming more acceptable to the masses.

JT As a record store employee, how much vinyl do you sell, and what do you see people going after now in new vinyl.

D People are buying more vinyl now than when I started working in the store 10 years ago. More major labels are now putting out more vinyl which is weird because vinyl is not really a money making format. It costs the most to manufacture and it offers the least profit margin to the label. CD’s cost pennies to make, it costs very little to offer a song to download. So it says a lot that the record industry has started putting out more. It’s all over the board. People are going after everything from hiphop to electronica, just regular rock, punk, soul people are buying all sorts of stuff. But I think people get off on finding obscure stuff or new stuff.

Looking for samples and whatnot.

JT What do you do when you’re not playing?

D It’s sad to say, but I usually end up in a bar or going to another city to see a band or DJ. I don’t know what transpired, but I used to go to a lot more house parties in Richmond either with a DJ or a band like every other weekend. It doesn’t happen much anymore.

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 39

written & illustrated b y Paul Seahorse of Hortus

40 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

Contagious Expose

Spreadbycontact Records A 12 track downtempo electronic hybrid filled with orginal tracks written by Lana Gentry and recorded at Deadbeat Studios.

Check out this debut and zone out to its relaxing blend of tracks inspired by Bjork, Chemical Brothers, and Basement Jaxx. spreadbycontact@spreadbycontact.com spreadbycontact.com

LOCAL

Richmond

/BryanCarter

Sic itur, our town all my life 6 am rising sun, rippling James, me, my people mise en place, Family is friends.

Drunkenly, we watch the sun Meek peak our fair city peepers giddy but willing.

This town, a force perfect cocktail, dirty, thirsty old South t’is something different plus.

Me and Johnny we’ve been everywhere always back home, t’ain’t no where but Richmond and ad astra between us, man.

Old RVA just like mom she brings you home welcomes you in sets a place, yours alone.

One Person Rally / Justin Adler

I don’t know what it is about Richmond, but this city begs for trouble. In the year of 2004 there were 100 murders in Richmond alone. That is about one murder every four days. Such numbers have given Richmond the prestige of being number eight in U.S. most dangerous cities. Granted, it is in a category of cities with a population of 100,000 - 499,999, it’s still something to be proud of I think?!

In the month of February there was one week which was bloodier than most. Five murders happened, and the most brazen of them occurred on the 1900 block of Carey Street at the BP gas station. In broad daylight a man walked up to a car, and pumped the driver and his passenger full of lead. Darryl Langhorne and James Ford, both 34, were killed Saturday afternoon, February 19th, in front of the gas station.

Francis, a cashier at that BP gas station, was working that day. He remembers the gunshots ringing out, but Francis, an immigrant from Kenya, didn’t see anything. I asked him whether he feels safe in Richmond and Francis, after taking a second to really think about it, tells me he has mixed emotions. He’s been living here for five years and had no idea how rampant murder is in this town. He sees the cops and, optimistically, feels they are helping out. In fact, when I went in to the gas station to talk with him, there were two cop cars behind the station and inside a security officer with a gun, not just the trusty flashlight. So their presence is felt.

But what are Richmond city officials doing to combat crime? Mayor Doug Wilder has been talking about this issue and held a town hall meeting in which he sought public opinion on the issue. Along with the appointment of new Police Chief Rodney Monroe seems to be a start on breaking the old ways and working on new ways to fight crime. Monroe hopes to start up a police unit focused solely on Homicide (hard to believe there wasn’t one to begin with) and is asking the city for over twenty new motor bikes to facilitate navigation through alleyways and building compounds, as well as

to get to different areas in the city fast.

Monroe has brought up the problem of murder cases being dropped because analysis of evidence isn’t done in a timely fashion. In this age of globalization, even here in Richmond we outsource our evidence analysis to other labs, and sometimes it’s too late in coming back, allowing for killers, drug dealers, and other delinquents to go out on the streets.

Thanks to double jeopardy, they can’t be tried again once the evidence is able to be used in court, because it is too late.

What are possible solutions to not only this ridiculous murder rate, but also the high crime rate of this city? Wilder and Monroe feel that the community should adopt a role in fighting crime in their neighborhoods. Neighborhood watch should be serious about its task and cooperate with police forces.

Monroe said that “more police presence alone won’t fix the problem. A better weapon is more community involvement.” Another thing he feels will deter criminals is better street lighting in places such as Gilpin court, as well as cleaning up trash in and around the area.

Let us hope he gets to work on it, and starts cleaning up the streets of Richmond. But this role should not be put solely on the shoulders of Wilder and Monroe, but also on the citizens of Richmond. More community out reach programs should be set up, getting kids, who would otherwise get themselves in trouble, out of the streets doing something productive.

Mentoring programs, midnight basketball, and a whole rack of other social programs should be put into effect. Crime is a loud “fuck you” to society. It is the answer to a lot of people who never were given opportunities in life, and to combat it, we must strike at the root.

Living standards should be bettered, minimum wage should be raised, and second chances should be given to people who otherwise wouldn’t get them.

“....more POLICE PRESENCE alone won’t fix the problem. A better weapon is more COMMUNITY INVOLVEMENT.”

46 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 47

THE CHRONIC LICKING OF A SELF-INFLICTED WOUND Early in the morning Tim Roland arrives at the methadone clinic. I meet him outside the unassuming building and he greets me in a preoccupied manner.

“Just let me get my dose”, he says, “I won’t be much good to you until then.”

He is inside the building a half hour, meeting with a counselor as he must always do for a brief talk and then his usual dosage. When he returns outside he is much more relaxed, composed. I offer him a smoke, he begins to talk about his experience. He says that he has to come here now everyday at the same time or he doesn’t get his medicine. The methadone makes him feel better but it never makes him well.

“I can’t say really when I got addicted, only when I first met heroin,” he said.

Roland, 25, grew up in Northern Virginia, just outside of Washington D.C. He is not the product of a bad environment, a misconception of the birth of addicts. He lived in a gated community with his parents who are still married, he never worried about a thing.

“My father has a high power job with the government,” he said, “and my mother held a high position with a corporation large enough to be a government.”

His high school years were spent in a barrage of good times. He spoke of totaling two cars and immediately receiving new ones because his parents didn’t want him to be without. He never had to work. He had privilege and opportunity and more options then most. Excess though, can lead to waste. So one night during his senior year when a friend produced 48 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

/ M. Dulin / An

a bag of heroin and offered him a line to snort he really didn’t hesitate.

ndre Shank “That first time...I’d never felt more wonderful in my life, like God was breathing on me,” Roland said.

Temptation stared him in the face. He did not just take a bite of the forbidden fruit, he bit the head off of the snake as well. Heroin quickly became his drug of choice. These were the last moments that he remembers having some control over his life. After that he says the great downward spiral began.

invite him in your house he looks at the kind of locks you have, your stereo system, anything that might have some value.

“I don’t like to be left alone,” he says, “I can’t trust myself.”

This addiction drove him away from reality, dreams of a future, he became empty and could never feel full. His parents were in denial for a long time he said. Even though they love him they are not very available, choosing instead to coddle him with money, enabling him to continue without really facing his problem.

He made it to Richmond after his parents had enough and lived with a well intending cousin, whom he eventually turned on.

“I am not Tim Roland anymore,” he says, “I’m just an addiction.”

People continually try to help Roland. They still see the human that is inflicted, but love sometimes is not as strong as a quick fix. So after stealing checks from a friend’s mother who took him in, the law was finally called in. This was his first offense. The courts took into account his addiction and he was sentenced to community service, mandatory drug-rehab meetings at a local methodist church and enrollment into the methadone maintenance treatment.

“You have to change your whole way of life to avoid falling back down,” he said.

Roland said that he has stolen and lied to everyone around him just to get cash for a fix. Sometimes in his stories that he tells of thieving and lying it seems that no one is immune to his actions, as if he means to say ‘Don’t take it personally.’ Responsibility always returns to the addiction and not to himself. Admitting that he is a junkie seems to make him feel better about the people that he has hurt as if he were a victim also. These people cared for the person Tim Roland, but Tim Roland had disappeared inside of a haze long ago.

Roland had a good upbringing, money and opportunity. He had to make choices in life as all people do. Only at a very young age he made a wrong choice. His choice has repercussions that he will have to live with the rest of his life. Now each day he must rise and return to the clinic just to feel normal again.

“I don’t see an end to this ever,” he said “all I can do is look back and remember the beginning.”

To see Roland, he appears very average, clean cut. Not the common Hollywood image of a junkie and during his lucid moments he is very upbeat. But in his head he says that the addiction is choosing the path; he is not looking at you, he is looking at your pockets for a wallet bulge, if you

Note: The names have been changed and the identity of the clinic remains anonymous out of respect for all involved.

He talked of how quickly the drug took him over. He says that he wishes that he did not have to come to the clinic, but this is not his choice, he is an addict and the cravings make him.

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 49

50 RVA / Wassup!!

52 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 53

QUiCK G U i D E Carytown

Colonial Heights

Acacia Alley Katz Amici Ristorante Arthur’s Avalon Avenue 805 Babe’s Bandito’s Burrito Lounge BBQ Pit Betsy’s Coffee Shop Bev’s Bogart’s Back Room Border Chophouse Buddy’s Place Cabo’s Corner Bistro Cafe Diem 54 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

theFan

Shockoe Bottom

Restaurant Club Restaurant Restaurant Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant Coffee Restaurant Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant Restaurant / Bar

Shockoe Slip

VCU

3325 W. Cary St. 354-6060 10 Walnut Alley 643-2816 http://www.alleykatzrva.com 3343 W. Cary St. 353-4700 5215 W. Broad St. 288-2800 2619 W Main St. 353-9709 http://www.avalonrestaurant.com 805 Davis Ave. 353-2505 3166 W. Cary St. 355-9330 2905 Patterson Ave. 354-9999 2231 Boulevard Ave. 526-1340 3200 W. Cary St. 358-4501 2911 W. Cary St. 204-2387 203 N. Lombardy St. 353-9280 1501 W. Main St. 355-2907 www.borderchophouse.com 12 N. Robinson St. 355-3701 www.buddysplace.net 2053 W. Broad St. 358-1144 www.cabosbistro.com 600 N. Sheppard St. 353-2500

Carytown Colonial Heights Caliente’ Canal Club Capital Ale House Cary Street Café Chopstix Chuggers Old City Pub Commercial Taphouse & Grill Corner Cafe Curbside Cafe Double T’s Real BBQ Easy Street Ellwood Thompson Emilio’s Tapas Bar Empire Europa Farouks’s House of india

theFan Shockoe Bottom Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Natural Market Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar

Shockoe Slip

VCU 2922 Park Ave. 1545 E. Cary St. 623 E Main St. 2631 W. Cary St. 3129 W Cary St. 900 W Franklin St. 111 N Robinson St.

2525 Hanover Ave. 2907 W. Cary St. 2401 W. Main St. 4 N. Thompson St. Broad & Meadow

1409 E Cary St. 3033 W. Cary St.

340-2920 643-2582 643-2537 353-7445 www.carystreetcafe.com 358-7027 353-8191 359-6544 282-5717 355-7008 353-4304 355-1198 www.easystreetrichmond.com 359-7525 359-1224 344-8040 643-0911 www.europarichmond.com 355-0378 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 55

Carytown Colonial Heights Fusion For Love of Chocolate Hard Shell Harrison St. Coffee Hyperlink Café I Love Hydroponics Ipanema Cafe Joe’s Inn Legend Brewing Company Lucky Lounge Mary Angela’s McCormack’s Irish Pub Metro Grill Mojo’s Mom’s Siam Mr. Bojangles 56 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

theFan Shockoe Bottom Restaurant / Bar Specialty Bakery Restaurant / Bar Coffee / Tea Restaurant / Bar Equipment Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Night Club

Shockoe Slip

VCU 109 S. 12th St. 2820 W. Cary St. 359-5645 1411 E. Cary St. 643-2333 www.thehardshell.com 402 N Harrison St. 359-8060 814 W. Grace St. 254-1942 612 N Sheppard St. 377-3020 917 W Grace St. 213-0170 205 N. Shields Ave. 355-2282 www.joesinn.com 321 W. 7th St. 232-8871 www.legendbrewing.com 1421 E. Cary St 648-5100 www.luckyloungerichmond.com 3345 W. Cary St. 353-2333 12 N. 18th St. 648-1003 301 N Robinson St. 353-4453 733 W. Cary St. 644-6676 2929 W. Cary St. 359-7606 550 E. Marshall St. 344-2901

Carytown

Colonial Heights

Mulligan’s Nanci Raygun New York Deli Out of Bounds Poe’s Pub Richbrau Brewing Co Rostov’s Coffee & Tea Robin Inn Sticky Rice Sven Shine Inn Taphouse Grill Thai Diner The Eatery The Roxie The Village Tobacco Company Tonic

theFan

Shockoe Bottom

Restaurant / Bar Night Club Restaurant Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Coffee / Tea Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar Restaurant / Bar

Shockoe Slip

VCU 323 W Main St. 353-8686 929 W. Grace St. 353-4263 www.nanciraygun.com 2920 W. Cary St. 355-6056 2701 W. Broad St. 355-7390 www.outofbounds.info 2706 E. Main St. 648-2120 www.poespub.com 1214 E Cary St. 644-3018 2902 W. Cary St. 355-1955 2601 Park Ave 2232 W Main St. 358-7870 www.stickyrice.

1319 W. Main St. 1212 E. Cary St. 644-3018 3028 W. Cary St. 353-9514 3000 W. Cary St. 353-6171 14 N. 18th St. 1001 W Grace St 1201 E. Cary St. 782-9555 9 N. 17th St.

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 57

Richmond Independent Radio schedule 02/22/05 Monday

6am-8am Breakfast Blend WRIR’s Multicultural Music 8am-9am Democracy Now! 9am-10am News and Notes w/Ed Gordon 10am-11am Le Show w/Harry Shearer 11am-12pm Power Point 12-12:30pm Home Grown C-SPAN 12:30-1pm Weekly Sedition Local and National Progressive News 1pm-2pm Prime Time Radio 2pm-4pm Talk of the Nation 4pm-4:30pm T.U.C 4:30-5pm Free Speech News 58 RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

5pm-7pm Lost Music Saloon Americana /alt-country 7pm-9pm Blue Monday

w/River City Blues Society 9pm-11pm Louisiana Dance Hall /cajun/creole/zydeco 11pm-1am The Edge of America

/bluegrass/jug band 1am-3am Great American Music Hour

Tuesday

6am-8am Breakfast Blend WRIR’s Multicultural Music 8am-9am Democracy Now 9am-10am News and Notes w/Ed Gordon 10am-11am Justice Talking 11am-12pm Power Point

12pm-12:30pm Enlace Informativo: En Espanol 12:30pm-1pm Brown Bag Lunch 1pm-2pm The Book Guys for Readers & Collectors 2pm-4pm Talk of the Nation 4pm-4:30 51%: Issues of Concern to Women 4:30pm-5pm Free Speech Radio News 5pm-7pm Stunted Development w/Bill Farrar 7pm-9pm The Project w/DJ Marshall /eclectic rock 9pm-11pm Mercury Falls/eclectic rock 11pm-1am Broadcastatic Audio Collage 1am-3am Mellow Madness /world/freeform

Wednesday

6am-8am Breakfast Blend WRIR’s Multicultural Music

8am-9am Democracy Now 9am-10am News & Notes w/Ed Gordon 10am-11am Living On Earth: Environmental News w/ Steve Curwood 11am-12pm Smart City:Urban life and Trends w/Carol Coletta 12pm-12:30pm Defenders LIVE! 12:30pm-1pm Asia Speaks 1pm-2pm New Dimensions: Uncommon Wisdom for Unconventional Times 2pm-4pm Talk of the Nation 4pm-4:30 pm This Way Out: International Lesbian & Gay Radio Magazine 4:30-5pm Free Speech Radio News 5pm-7pm Wide Ear Folk w/Eric Walters 7pm-9pm Activate! w/Mike Rutz Artists in Richmond 9pm-11pm Radiomorphism w/DJ Morphism /industrial 11pm-1am Pop & Crackle w/DJ CHR 1am-3am Late Night Flight /eclectic rock

Thursday

6am-8am Breakfast Blend WRIR’s Multicultural Music 8am-9am Democracy Now 9am-10am News and Notes w/Ed Gordon 10am-10:30am Wings: Women’s Independent News Gathering Service 10:30am-11am Counterspin: Media Criticism w/FAIR 11am-12pm Voices Of Our World 12pm-12:30pm Richmond Indymedia News 12:30pm-1pm Inspiration Corner: Real Women, Real Life, Real Issues 1pm-2pm The Parent’s Journal 2pm-4pm Talk of the Nation 4-4:30pm Radio Nation

4:30-5pm Free Speech News 5pm-7pm Future Perfect w/The TinyDj /new rock 7pm-9pm The Secret Stash w/Stuart Martin /indie rock 9pm-11pm Funwrecker Ball w/DJ Esskay /rock/punk/ reggae 11pm-1am Zendo Soundsystem w/DJ Nomadic/dub 1am-3am You Should BE In Bed

w/Donald Moss/ Indie

Friday

6am-8am Breakfast Blend WRIR’s Multicultural Music 8am-9am Democracy Now 9am-10am News and Notes w/Ed Gordon 10am-11am Thomas Jefferson Hour 11am-12pm Selected Shorts: Short Stories

Read by Great Actors 12pm-12:30pm Richmond Education Today 12:30pm-1pm Open Ear & Mind 1pm-2pm Calling All Pets: Advice & Entertainment for Pet Lovers 2pm-4pm Talk of the Nation’s Science Friday 4-4:30pm Radio Nation 4:30-5pm Free Speech News 5pm-7pm Global World A Go-Go w/Bill Lupoletti 7pm-9pm Beep Ahh Fresh Hip-Hop

w/Chuck B & Hoodrich 9pm-11pm Vinyl Cartel

w/Logan & Krames/hip hop 11pm-1am St. John the Pabstist

w/J. Swart & B. Potter/loud rock 1am-3am Screams from the Gutter

w/ Michelle & Justin/punk/metal

Saturday

6am-9am TBA 9am-11am The British Breakfast w/Jesse

Reilly & Gene Pembleton 11am-1pm Shake Some Action/classic rock 1pm-3pm Derek Sunshine/eclectic rock 3pm-5pm Songs from the Big Hair 80’s/rock 5pm-7pm Locals Only w/Scott Burger 7pm-9pm Mutiny w/JTF

/electronic dance 9pm-11pm DJ Spotlight/electronic dance 11pm-1am Frequency/electronic dance 1am-3am Reggae Connection

w/Milton Williams/reggae/ska 3am-6am Combustion w/DJ C/trance

Sunday

6am-9am El Che Y La Rubia

w/tango/folkloric/rock en espanol 9am-11am Sunday Morning Salsa 11am-1pm All Jazz with Giz Bowe 1pm-3pm Freedom Jazz Dance 3pm-5pm The Other Black Music You Don’t

Get To Hear On Richmond Radio

w/Charles Williams/alternating

w/Ambiance Congo w/David

Noyes/r&b/ funk/african 5pm-7pm The Motherland Influence w/ Charles Williams & David Noyes/

african/caribbean/latin 7pm-9pm If Music Could Talk w/DJ Carlito world/freeform 9pm-11pm The Ming From Mongo Show 11pm-1am 804noise Presents Noise Solution/experimental 1am-3am Uncommon Practice

w/Bill Eldridge/modern classical/

electroacoustic RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 59

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 60

The Back Pages

Would I be helping him come to terms with his identity by taking part in his masturbatory fantasy? Or would I be scarring him for life since I’m not interested in anything long-term? I’m

I swear it was like that, one big run-on sentence. We talked for four hours and he says that he’s not gay. He just wants to be a woman. The strain of living as two people is really getting to him, he said, hence the heavy drinking and pot smoking. I suggested therapy, not to “fix” him but to get to a place where it doesn’t make him so unhappy. Now I’m not sure what to do. I can tell that he’s crushing on me. He was before he told me his big secret, and now that he’s confided his secret to me, his crush has intensified. I wasn’t really interested in him to begin with, but I must admit his admission makes him more appealing.

I really do want him to dress up for me; I’m just not sure that I’m ready to deal with his reaction when I don’t want to live happily ever after—especially if he sticks with the idea of becoming a woman. I’m just not sexually interested in actual women.

Q. I’m a 24-year-old straight female. I just moved to a new city, where I don’t know anyone. So the other night I hung out with a 21-year-old jock from work.

We went to a bar and eventually wound up back at his apartment, where we both smoked pot. I was thinking he was a muscle-bound meathead, so to shock him I told him a story about one of my male friends wearing a skirt. He kind of exploded and said, “You have guy friends who wear skirts? That’s weird because I like to dress up like a woman and it turns me on and I really want to be a girl and I want to be pretty and I have these huge muscles because I’m fighting it and I’ve never told anybody this before and I can’t believe I just told you and it’s probably because I’m drunk and do you think it would be OK if someday I dressed up for you?”

RVA / Respect, Revenge, & Androids 61

A. There are two things you want here, TVTS. You want to see the musclebound 21-year-old dressed up in women’s clothes for kicks, and you want to see the muscle-bound 21-yearold in therapy for his own good. So why not make his dressing up for you contingent upon his finding a therapist?

Tell him you’re tempted but you’re not going to go there if you’re the only person he can talk to about this stuff. If he wants to mess around and explore with you, fine, great, you’re game for that. But that’s all you’re signing up for. You can’t be his therapist and you’re not making any commitments.

Explain to him that if you knew you were the only person he had to talk to about his desires, you would feel obligated to continue seeing him even if you decided, for any number of other reasons, that the relationship wasn’t working out. I guarantee you, TVTS, that he’ll have his first therapy session scheduled a half-hour after you get off the phone.

afraid that if I reject him now he’s going to think it’s because of the crossdressing.

—TOLD VERY TITILLATING SECRET

/DanSavage

SavageLove

Oura / Respect, Revenge, & Androids

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