March14 issue

ISABEL WE DIDN’T START THE FIRE BEING THERE FOR YOUR KIDS IN RECOVERY LEGALIZING MEDICAL MARIJUANA IN THE STATE OF FLORIDA QUIT IGNORING YOUR THOUGHTS ENDING THE RELAPSE CYCLE USING ENERGY PSYCHOLOGY TECHNIQUES AND PROCESSES

MARIJUANA-WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE? SIBLINGS... THE FORGOTTEN ONES RISING STAR DIMMED BY ADDICTION SPECIAL HELP FOR NURSES WITH ADDICTIONS DISSOCIATION AND ADDICTION: THE DILEMMA OF EMOTION

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A LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER Dear Readers, I welcome you to The Sober World magazine. This magazine is being directly mailed each month to anyone that has been arrested due to drugs and alcohol in Palm Beach County. It is also distributed locally to all Palm Beach County High School Guidance Counselors, Middle School Coordinators, Palm Beach County Drug Court, Broward County School Substance Abuse Expulsion Program, Broward County Court Unified Family Division, Local Colleges and other various locations. We also directly mail to many rehabs throughout the state and country.

convince your loved one that they need help. There are detox centers that provide medical supervision to help them through the withdrawal process, There are Transport Services that will scoop up your resistant loved one (under 18 yrs. old) and bring them to the facility you have chosen. There are long term Residential Programs (sometimes a year and longer) as well as short term programs (30-90 days), there are Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Wilderness programs, Extended Living and there are Sober Living Housing where they can work, go to meetings and be accountable for staying clean.

We are expanding our mission to assist families worldwide in their search for information about Drug and Alcohol Abuse.

Many times a Criminal Attorney will try to work out a deal with the court to allow your child or loved one to seek treatment as an alternative to jail. I know how overwhelming this period can be for you and I urge every parent or relative of an addict to get some help for yourself. There are many groups that can help you. There is Al-Anon, Alateen (for teenagers), Families Anonymous, Nar-Anon and more. This is a disease that affects the whole family, not just the parents.

Our monthly magazine is available for free on our website at www.thesoberworld.com.

If you would like to receive an E-version monthly of the magazine, please send your e-mail address to patricia@thesoberworld.com Drug addiction has reached epidemic proportions throughout the country and is steadily increasing. It is being described as “the biggest man-made epidemic” in the United States. More people are dying from drug overdoses than from any other cause of injury death, including traffic accidents, falls or guns.

Many Petty thefts are drug related, as the addicts need for drugs causes them to take desperate measures in order to have the ability to buy their drugs. The availability of prescription narcotics is overwhelming; as parents our hands are tied.

Doctors continue writing prescriptions for drugs such as Oxycontin, and Oxycodone (which is an opiate drug and just as addictive as heroin) to young adults in their 20’s and 30’s right up to the elderly in their 70”s, thus, creating a generation of addicts.

Did you know that Purdue Pharma, the company that manufactures Oxycontin generated $3.1 BILLION in revenue in 2010? Scary isn’t it?

Addiction is a disease but there is a terrible stigma attached to it. As family members affected by this disease, we are often too ashamed to speak to anyone about our loved ones addiction, feeling that we will be judged. We try to pass it off as a passing phase in their lives, and some people hide their head in the sand until it becomes very apparent such as through an arrest, getting thrown out of school or even worse an overdose, that we realize the true extent of their addiction.

I know that many of you who are reading this now are frantic that their loved one has been arrested. No parent ever wants to see his or her child arrested or put in jail, but this may be your opportunity to save your child or loved one’s life.

They are more apt to listen to you now than they were before, when whatever you said may have fallen on deaf ears. This is the point where you know your loved one needs help, but you don’t know where to begin.

I have compiled this informative magazine to try to take that fear and anxiety away from you and let you know there are many options to choose from.

There are Psychologists and Psychiatrists that specialize in treating people with addictions. There are Education Consultants that will work with you to figure out what your loved ones needs are and come up with the best plan for them. There are Interventionists who will hold an intervention and try to

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These groups allow you to share your thoughts and feelings. As anonymous groups, your anonymity is protected. Anything said within those walls are not shared with anyone outside the room. You share only your first name, not your last name. This is a wonderful way for you to be able to openly convey what has been happening in your life as well as hearing other people share their stories. You will find that the faces are different but the stories are all too similar. You will also be quite surprised to see how many families are affected by drug and alcohol addiction.

Addiction knows no race or religion; it affects the wealthy as well as the poor, the highly educated, old, young-IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE. This magazine is dedicated to my son Steven who graduated with top honors from University of Central Florida. He graduated with a degree in Psychology, and was going for his Masters in Applied Behavioral Therapy.

He was a highly intelligent, sensitive young man who helped many people get their lives on the right course. He could have accomplished whatever he set his mind out to do. Unfortunately, after graduating from college he tried a drug that was offered to him not realizing how addictive it was and the power it would have over him.

My son was 7 months clean when he relapsed and died of a drug overdose.

I hope this magazine helps you find the right treatment for your loved one.

They have a disease and like all diseases, you try to find the best care suited for their needs. They need help.

Deaths from prescription drug overdose have been called the “silent epidemic” for years. There is approximately one American dying every 17 minutes from an accidental prescription drug overdose. Please don’t allow your loved one to become a statistic. I hope you have found this magazine helpful. You may also visit us on the web at www.thesoberworld.com.

We are also on Face Book at The Sober World and Sober-World Steven.

Sincerely,

Patricia

Publisher Patricia@TheSoberWorld.com

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ISABEL

By Rabbi Dr. Abraham J. Twerski I learned many things at meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. Inasmuch as I never drank, why did I attend meetings of AA? Here’s how it happened.

I was in my second year of psychiatric training when I received a call from the psych emergency room. A woman said she had to see a psychiatrist promptly and could not wait for an appointment.

Isabel was sixty-one. She was one of three daughters of an Episcopalian priest. Isabel began drinking late in adolescence, and at twenty she was into very heavy drinking. She married and had a child.

When the child was three, her husband said, “Make your choice. It’s either the booze or the family.” “I knew I could not stop drinking,” Isabel said, “and I wasn’t much of a wife or mother. It was only decent to give him the divorce he asked for.”

At sixty-one, Isabel was attractive, and she must have been stunning at twenty-eight. Free and unattached, she began serving as an escort to some of Pittsburgh’s social elite. She had a beautiful apartment, the latest in fashions, and all the alcohol she wanted.

After five years, the alcohol began to cause behavioral changes that made Isabel undesirable company for her clientele. She then began serving a lower socio-economic clientele, and very rapidly deteriorated.

She was soon living in flea-bag hotels and prostituting.

Every so often, Isabel was found passed-out and taken to a hospital for detoxification. She attended the AA meeting in the hospital, and upon discharge promptly resumed drinking. When I assumed the position as director of psychiatry at St. Francis Hospital, I looked up Isabel’s record. Between 1938 and 1956, Isabel had been detoxed at this hospital 59 times! At another hospital that offered detox she had 22 admissions. I was unable to get any information from other hospitals where she had undergone detoxification.

Isabel’s family was horrified by her behavior and disowned her. Her phone calls to her sisters were answered with a brusque, “Don’t you dare call me again” and a hang-up.

In 1956, Isabel approached a lawyer who had helped her out of some alcohol-related jams. “David, I need a favor,” she said.

“Good God!” the lawyer said. “Not again! What did you do this time?”

“I’m not in any trouble,” Isabel said. “I want you to put me away in the state hospital for a year.”

At that time Pennsylvania statutes had an Inebriate Act, under which a chronic alcoholic could be committed to a state hospital for “a year and one day.” This law had been used by families who wanted to get a chronic alcoholic out of their hair. No alcoholic had ever asked to be put away for a year.

“You don’t know what you’re asking for,” the lawyer said. “You’re crazy.”

“If I’m crazy, I really belong in the state hospital,” Isabel said.

Isabel continued to press her request, and the lawyer finally took her before the judge and had her committed to the state hospital.

After a year of sobriety, Isabel left the state hospital and promptly went to an AA meeting. Someone gave her a few nights of shelter, and she soon found a job as a housekeeper for a prominent physician.

The doctor was retired and was a chronic alcoholic. Many times Isabel had to lift him off the floor and put him in bed. He sat on the board of several foundations and was periodically called to testify at Senate hearings. Isabel would receive a call from the doctor’s children, “Dad has to be in Washington in two weeks. Get him into shape.” Isabel would detox the doctor, get him a haircut and shave, and put him on the plane to Washington. “Now don’t you drink on the plane or in Washington,” she said. “When you come back tomorrow, I’ll be waiting for you with a bottle.” The doctor obeyed like a well-trained puppy.

I had never heard anything like this before. My first career was as a rabbi, and seminary did not teach me anything about alcoholism.

Medical school was no better. I learned much about some rare diseases but nothing about the most common disease a doctor encounters. In my psychiatric training I was learning much about mental

6

illnesses, but alcohol and drugs were never mentioned.

I was so fascinated by Isabel’s story that I neglected to ask her what the acute emergency was. As a fledgling psychiatrist, I knew that there had to be motivation for a person to seek help. What could possibly have motivated Isabel to take so drastic a measure, to put herself into a state mental hospital for a year by a court order? I had to discover her reason, so I told her to come back in a week for another session.

In the next session I heard some more interesting stories. Inasmuch as I did not have a clue about her motivation, I had her come back the following week. To make a long story short, I saw Isabel once a week for thirteen years. One night, at age seventy-four, she died peacefully in her sleep.

I was curious how she was managing to stay sober. It was obvious to me that medicine and psychiatry had no effective treatment for alcoholism. What was her secret?

“I go to meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous,” she said. In 1961, none of the celebrities had revealed that they were recovering alcoholics. Few people outside of AA knew anything about it.

“What happens at these meetings?” I asked. “”Who provides the treatment?”

“We have speakers meetings and discussion meetings, and we share our experiences,” Isabel said.

“Do you have psychiatrists or psychologists there?” I asked.

Isabel said, “There is one psychologist who shows up occasionally, but he’s still drunk most of the time.”

“Look, Isabel,” I said. “Some kind of treatment must be going on at these meetings if they are keeping you sober. Can I come and see for myself?”

“Sure,” Isabel said. That week she took me to my first AA meeting.

The first thing that struck me at the meeting was that there was no stratification. Everyone was equal. No one could become president of the organization, and furthermore, money could not buy any special privileges.

As a rabbi, part of my job was to raise funds to cover the annual budget. Money came from the congregates’ donations. People of lesser means made smaller contributions, and wealthier people made substantial contributions. I liked everyone equally, but I had to handle the large donors with silk gloves. I could not risk offending them, lest they leave for another congregation. Wealthy congregates received special treatment.

It is said that “Before God, everyone is equal.” God can afford to treat everyone equally. He doesn’t have to make mortgage payments each month. I did.

Any organization that is dependent on contributions is in the same situation. People with money or political clout are given preferential treatment. What impressed me about AA was that once people entered the room, everyone was equal. The rich received no special attention. Sometimes a poor person was in the position to help a wealthy person. Nor did academic status count. A fifth grade drop-out and a PhD were treated equally. I had never encountered anything like this!

Here is an example of AA’s independence. I received a call from a man who said that he wanted to make a contribution of $10,000 to AA in memory of his late sister, who had enjoyed fourteen years of sobriety with the help of AA. He asked me where to send the check.

I called several people in AA, and when no one could help me, I called the AA central office. “Don’t send the check here,” they said. “We can’t do anything with it.”

“Then how can this man make a contribution?” I asked.

“He can cash the check at the bank and go to a meeting. When they pass the basket, he can put the money in.”

Continued on page 30

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7

WE DIDN’T START THE FIRE

By Dr. Howard Samuels

I was maybe 14 years old the first time I tried marijuana. I was a child of privilege, well-known and (I imagined) well-liked by everyone in our community. My brother and sisters were well-adjusted and focused, my mom a regal-yet-fun-loving socialite and my father was an incredibly successful businessman who would one day get his feet wet in politics before being taken from us (too soon, I thought) by a heart attack.

Surprisingly enough, his death was the catalyst that finally got me truly committed to my recovery from drugs and alcohol, but – and this may also surprise you – I am one of millions of people with an addictive/ compulsive personality. Does this make me a bad person? No. Does this make me a prude? No. Does it make me aware?

Yes. Earlier this week, both the Democratic and Republican parties got together and produced a bill to decriminalize Marijuana in Maryland.

This, in the Great Scheme Of Things, is coming on the heels of California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s signing into law SB1449, a bill that makes it okay to carry an ounce of cannabis on your person; making possession an infraction instead of a misdemeanor.

Meanwhile, in Colorado, Amendment 64 was passed, making it the only place in the world to legalize the possession, use, production, distribution, and personal cultivation of Marijuana (in December, Uruguay did the same, but their legislation has yet to be drawn up and enacted as they define the finer points of supply, demand, and responsible distribution). But these are just a handful of states in the union to address this trend. The winds of change are blowing, and the craze to make marijuana legal is spreading like wildfire.

Don’t get me wrong; I am a firm supporter of the decriminalization of marijuana. I don’t think anyone should go to prison for possession of small quantities of marijuana. I also believe that medical marijuana has its place in our society (we have discovered a way to produce different strains of marijuana with diminished levels of tetrahydrocannabinol – THC – the ingredient in pot that gets you high, while preserving the substances which make it medically beneficial).

This is a miracle of modern science, to be sure, but all it seemed to do is piss the potheads off.

The people who are fighting, desperately, to make marijuana legal – the people who want to make every state exactly like the state of Colorado – aren’t fighting for the right to use marijuana to take care of the sick or the dying; they aren’t fighting to exploit pot’s ability to stop seizures or increase appetites for their loved ones who are enduring round after round of chemotherapy.

These people are fighting for the right to get high.

They want marijuana to be taxed and regulated the same way alcohol is which, to my sensibilities, seems like a huge mistake. Their argument is that it will stave off gang-related activity and that it will be a big boom for the economy, but I don’t see it that way.

8

I see billboards lining the streets, each adorned with hip and slick ads that my children will see on their way to school. I see Big Tobacco Industries – many of whom we’ve only just recently started to force away from our lives – suddenly finding a new cash-crop to shove into the faces of my family and friends, creating communities where every household has at least one casualty of legalization; a pothead who wakes up, smokes a “joint”, and sits on the couch all day watching cartoons.

And I see miles and miles of farmland -- hundreds and hundreds of acres -- dedicated to the Mass Production of Marijuana crops to bookend the sudden demand for bigger and better buds which will (from seed to smoke) be grown specifically to put our communities to “sleep”... because there will be no reason to hide them anymore.

I know that I sound like one of those people who stand on a soap box while showing crowds reels of the black-and-white film “Refer Madness”, or maybe I sound like the lone survivor of a sci-fi nightmare, screaming in the rain as truckloads of pods go storming past, but I’m not. I’m a man who smoked pot on a daily basis for years and accomplished nothing; indeed, it wasn’t until I stopped doing drugs and went back to school and got my Doctorate in psychology and became the addiction specialist that I am today that I realized that maybe the numbers are wrong; that maybe it isn’t “just me”.

But, more importantly, I’m not chomping at the bit to find out, and you shouldn’t be, either. What’s happening in Maryland – and we’re talking bipartisan fronts pushing for the legalization (not decriminalization) of marijuana; two opposing communities uniting to fight for the right of their constituents to get loaded and waste away all day – is just the tip of the iceberg. Because what they’re proposing is a very dangerous new world order, one where some loser can get high and get behind the wheel of a car, or where your children can walk into a 7-Eleven and buy a pack of marijuana joints for ten bucks (and don’t insult my intelligence and say that wouldn’t happen; teenagers buy both cigarettes and alcohol, despite the restrictions, all the time).

My point is that we, as a society, need to become more involved in this conversation, because what our legislators are proposing is dangerous. And, I am speaking from experience. I have worked in the field of addiction for over two decades and I own and operate a drug and alcohol rehab; I know whereof I speak. THINK before you vote.

READ the Fine Print of the legislation and try to understand what it is they are proposing before you cast your ballots.

We didn’t start the fire, but we can sure as hell put it out.

Dr. Howard Samuels is a licensed Psychotherapist. He is one of the nation’s leading drug and alcohol experts. As the founder of The Hills Treatment Center in Los Angeles, he has been working in the addiction field for over twenty years. He is a recovering cocaine and heroin addict who has been sober for 28 years.

To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

9

BEING THERE FOR YOUR KIDS IN RECOVERY

By Claudia Black, Ph.D

On December 31, 1996, the day after I got sober, the last thing I wanted to face was what I had done to my kids. Prior to sobriety, as a father, what I had going for me was the law, the Ten Commandments, and the tradition that adult men protect their kids. So when I became sober, the first thing I wanted to do was quickly reassert their respect for me based upon everything I had going for me. This might have worked when they were small and I had drank only a short period but by the time I got sober nobody could say that I deserved all the respect that the law and the Ten Commandments provided for.

I realized I was going to have to get to know the kids and vice versa.

I wanted to regain their respect. Today I have been in recovery for several years and have regained that respect, but not by asserting what I had in the first place but by “letting go” of the outcome of my relationships after I had done all I could to change, trusting that God would then do his thing. – Wally It has always been my belief that parents truly love their children and genuinely want what is best for them, yet that message often becomes convoluted, inconsistent and sometimes nearly non-existent when addiction begins to pervade the family system. As much as parents want to correct this, the focus of early recovery is often on recovery practices, the marriage or partnership, and job or career. This is coupled with parents frequently just not knowing what to say to their children, or how best to interact with them. This confusion can be as true for the adult child as for the adolescent age or younger child.

In many cases it is easy to ignore the issue of what to say or how to interact with your children if someone else, such as an ex-spouse or grandparents, predominantly raises them, or they are adults living on their own. Children can also impede the process by either pretending all is just fine between you and them because you are now clean and sober. And, in fact, for many it is better already. Or they distance themselves from you with aloofness or anger.

The inability to be intimate, to share yourself with your children, to be there for them, is one of the most tragic losses in life. Having worked with thousands of addicted parents, I’ve seen their eyes shimmer with tears and glow with love when they talk about their children.

Working with a host of parents I was inspired by the depth of love and vulnerability shared as they talked about how their addiction impacted their children, and the hope that their recovery would provide them the positive influence and connection that they would like to have with their children.

What Do You Say To Your Children In recovery there is a lot of wreckage of the past that needs to be addressed and there is a lot of moving forward that will happen as well. What your children want most is to know you love them. They want you to be there for them and with them. That can be hard to recognize if your children are angry or distant. It can be hard to do given the priority needed to learning how to live clean and sober.

Creating new relationships or mending old relationships doesn’t happen overnight. The most important thing you can do for your children is to stay clean and sober.

Regardless of the age of the child, these six basics need to be woven into discussions about addiction.

Children need to hear that you love them ― that you always have and always will.

1. Children need to hear you are sorry for your behavior.

2. Children need to know that they are not at fault and in no way did they cause the need for you to drink, use drugs, or engage in any addictive behavior.

3. Children need to know that you would like to have more openness and honesty in the relationship, and that you realize this begins with you.

4. Children need to hear that you will do everything in your power to abstain from the addictive behavior.

5. Children need to know that you will take responsibility for your behaviors and addiction, and are now accountable for living

10

differently and being accountable for your recovery.

6. Children need to know you will listen to their experiences and be available if they want to talk.

Healthy Parenting Practices And then they need healthy parenting. When it comes to protecting your kids, the presence of protective factors in their lives is more powerful than the presence of risk factors, stresses, or trauma.

Factors that make such a positive difference are: • Close family relationships, where members nurture and are supportive of each other • Consistent parenting • Consistent praise, low criticism • Clear expectations, high expectations • Spending quality time with family members • Coping with stress in positive ways • Strong bonds with pro-social institutions such as school, community or churches One of the most important things you can do in a family is to have positive family rituals. Research has told us “Eating dinner with your children six or seven nights a week and turning off the television during dinner reduces the risk of children smoking, drinking and using drugs.” Now I would also add turning off notebooks, cell phones, etc. I am sure some of you are gasping at the impossibility of eating dinner that many times as a family. Breathe. Consider what rituals are in your family system.

Unfortunately in many homes with active addiction, rituals are often overlooked or very disappointing as there is often a lot of pain, anger or even fear. Healthy rituals are those times that the implicit message is one of the family being together that says we are a family unit that is safe, welcoming, and a source of support. We value each other.

Thinking about your family, if the children are still in the home, do you have daily family rituals? In the morning? After school? At dinnertime?

At bedtime?

Are those rituals something that can be done more often? If you eat dinner as a group once weekly, can you enhance it to two times, and then three? If you never eat together in the morning can you pick a particular morning where you do that?

For kids of any age: What do you and your family do for birthdays? How is each child acknowledged on his or her birthday? How would you like to see that changed? Are special birthdays singled out for added celebration, such as becoming a teenager at age 13, or at 16, 18, 21 or the decades in adulthood? Is this something to which you would like to give greater consideration?

Ask your family members what types of family traditions they have liked. You may be surprised that you already have some rituals just not thought about in that way, and by knowing what they are you can feel good about continuing them.

Creating new rituals does not need to be elaborate. Having a bedtime ritual may be as simple as acknowledging your children when they go to bed. Or, getting up with them in the morning, assuring they get something to eat; or once a week stopping for ice cream or yogurt on the way home from school. You could have a weekly ritual where everyone takes part in cooking the meal. It may be something such as everyone sitting down and beginning the meal by stating one positive thing that happened during the day. A new holiday ritual could involve the family doing community service work together like working a food shelter. A Christmas ritual could be everyone going to choose the tree together.

While research is telling us is how important family rituals are in building resilience with kids, healthy rituals can still be developed with adult children as well as younger children. Often grandchildren can be the impetus for coming up with new rituals.

Continued on page 30

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11

LEGALIZING MEDICAL MARIJUANA IN THE STATE OF FLORIDA A Drug Education Article by Suncoast Rehab Center

Medical Marijuana and its potential legalization in Florida is such a hot topic now that we wanted to share this radio show interview with you.

This interview was done on Feb 6, 2014 on The Morning Show with host Preston Scott, WFLA.com interviewing the Executive Director, Tammy Strickling.

Radio Interview: Preston (Host): Tammy Strickling is the Executive Director of Suncoast Rehab. Tammy, good morning. Welcome to the morning show.

Tammy: Thanks, Preston.

Preston: I’m leery – I personally think that the medical marijuana is just kind of the first step to full legalization of marijuana, but let’s just talk for just a quick second about medical marijuana. From your perspective, what are the downsides, if any?

Tammy: Well, I completely agree with you. I think that it would create an epidemic similar to, if not greater than, the prescription drug epidemic that we’ve seen. I argue that we already have so many pills to help people who are terminally ill and who have pain – why introduce something else that our kids will get a hold of and will negatively affect our society?

Preston: That’s one of the things. I use – my background, I’ve been intimately involved since the 1980’s with teen challenge – my experience as a pastor and working with young people. Plus, you know, I’m a parent! And parents dodge this issue and deal with this issue off and on. A lot of people just don’t believe the fact out there that marijuana use, when it’s in the hands of young people – which I think this inevitably gets to – it trickles down into the hands of really young people – it damages the mind and… isn’t it a gateway drug?

Tammy: Absolutely. And anyone that says it isn’t a gateway drug doesn’t know what they’re talking about because it absolutely is. In my center we have – in probably 98% of our clients – marijuana is the top of their drug list. They started with marijuana or alcohol. Alcohol is also a gateway drug. So, it just gets more and more and they try something else. You can’t ever get that same high, so you’re always chasing the first high and a better one and that often times leads to harder substances.

Preston: Joining us on the program is Tammy Strickling, she is the Executive Director of Suncoast Rehab. We’re talking about the legalization of medical marijuana, which I personally think is a step to full legalization. Let’s talk as well about the change. I think a lot of the people that are pushing this, might have lit up and were reefer addicts back in the day, but you know Mary Jane is different today. The toxicity in terms of the potency is very, very different today, isn’t it?

Tammy: Much different. Much different. And that’s an argument that people say, “Oh, it’s natural, it’s grown in the earth.” Well, not anymore. Now it’s grown in greenhouses, warehouses, basements. Lights are used to simulate the sun, fans used to simulate the outdoors. It’s modified just like the genetically modified foods. And chemicals are added to grow more of it faster. Its potency today is about a 100 times stronger than it was 10 years ago.

So, my question to the people that are fighting for it is: Why? What’s the purpose? Because I don’t believe all of them are terminally ill or have relatives that are. It’s – really the intention is just to get high. And that’s the problem.

Preston: Exactly, and if we focus on just the medical side of marijuana for right now – because obviously that’s going to be the core issue in the publicity and the promotion of this in the coming months through the November election. Tammy – if we just focus on what you started with and that is that we have a prescription drug epidemic in our country and certainly in our state and that is, that kids are obtaining their parent’s pills and they’re taking them and they’re using them and some of them are getting addicted to those pills. What makes anyone think it’s going to be any different with weed? I might add that if you watch a kid on the street corner popping pills, it might get your attention, but there’s such a degree of social acceptance right now to lighting up a joint that I don’t think people are going to think anything of it.

Tammy: I completely agree with you. Ultimately the result will be a dumbed-down society. Why we always go to a pill or a drug to escape reality – because at the end of the day it’s not going to make you better, stronger or smarter. It doesn’t do any of those things. We have so many substances to help people with pain that have proven time and time again that they all get abused.

So, I really think it’s time for everyone to get honest about why they’re

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pushing for it and let’s focus on the problem. What problem is someone trying to solve? And let’s not keep covering it up with drugs – let’s actually get to the source.

Preston: I’m curious…

Tammy: Because it will get in the hands of kids – absolutely.

Preston: Oh yeah. That’s a guarantee. Tammy, I’m curious, I don’t know exactly how you might run your rehab center specifically but I know that in a lot of rehab centers they have kind of peer counseling, peer groups, times when people come together and talk about their shared experiences and all that. Does the subject of legalizing medical marijuana ever come up among clients of yours?

Tammy: We haven’t addressed that specifically. I mean it does, people of course talk about it – just like anywhere – there’s the pros and cons.

Preston: I’m curious what someone who is dealing with and who is in a rehab center because of addictions to drugs/alcohol that started with an addiction to marijuana, they thought – you know it’s like the old George Carlin joke – “I’ve been smoking weed for 20 years, I’m not hooked.”

Tammy: Right.

Preston: I’m just curious what the perspective of someone who’s trying to come away from that is on the legalization of it.

Tammy: Yeah. Well, we have a pretty unique program in that we don’t use any drugs, no substitute drugs to get people off drugs, and really we work to identify what situation in the person’s life they couldn’t confront or they felt that they couldn’t handle that led them down the path of drug use. Because drug use is really just a symptom of something else.

Preston: Sure.

Tammy: So, we really try to promote responsible, active, healthy living.

You don’t need a drug to actually fix you physically or mentally. If your body is doing its job, it’s healthy, doesn’t have any deficiencies created through years of drug use and mentally you know you can feel empowered, can handle your life and your environment; you don’t need to go down that path. So, there are many people - because they’re being taught how to live without drugs - that are against it.

But there are those that are like “Oh, it’s no big deal. It’s natural…” you know, the same kind of argument. So, I would say that it’s a split bag in treatment.

Preston: Tammy, I’m going to run just a minute late in this segment here, but I have to ask you this question.

Tammy: Sure.

Preston: And for those of you just tuning in, Tammy Strickling, Executive Director of Suncoast Rehab. We’re talking about the legalization of marijuana –medical marijuana – here in the state of Florida.

If you were sitting across the table from John Morgan, who has been running this extensive campaign about God gave it to us, blah, blah, blah.

What would you say to him that you think he just does not know and/or get?

Tammy: Well, I don’t know that he would listen, because he’s very outspoken and as you know…

Preston: Understood, but let’s just say a magical moment happened and he sat and listened.

Tammy: A magical (laughs)…

Preston: What would you say to him?

Tammy: I would say to him that our children are our future and look at the condition that our society and our country is in right now. And by giving children access – free, wild access – to drugs, including marijuana, which is a psychoactive substance – it is absolutely a drug – it is just destructive. It’s destructive to our culture, to our society and to our future. I think we owe the kids more – and a better shot.

Preston: Tammy, thanks so much, I appreciate your time this morning.

Maybe we’ll check in a little later, as this campaign unfolds. I appreciate it.

Tammy: Great, my pleasure.

Here is the full show if you are interested: www.WFLA.com www.wflafm.com/media/podcast-the-morning-show-wpreston-scotttmsdaily/020614-hour-3-confessions-of-a-24296833/ We are a long-term in-patient treatment program. Call us today.

866-572-1788. www.Suncoastrehabcenter.us

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13

QUIT IGNORING YOUR THOUGHTS

By Dr. Tony W. DeRamus

I recently attended a social event with a group of chiropractors in Florida.

It was the typical social outing with hors d’oeuvre, dancing, and of course, alcohol. Most everyone in the group knows of my background with marijuana and of my book, The Secret Addiction; Overcoming Your Marijuana Dependency. As with most people who understand the disease of addiction, I was approached by a fellow colleague, David, who started the conversation about his own personal experience with alcohol.

David has been sober for four years. Although David never drank alcohol in the mornings before work, he certainly couldn’t wait until the last patient left so that he could drive to his local corner store to purchase his nightly buffet of beer. As we know with many drug addicts, David had an elaborate routine to hide the magnitude of his problem. He would purchase two 6-packs of beer so that he could drink one before he reached home. Obviously, David’s irrational thinking led him to believe his addiction would not be as apparent if he walked through the door with only six beers every night instead of twelve. He also explained how he knew of every place he had liquor stored in his house and how much was left in each bottle. Like most drug addicts, David kept a very close watch on his inventory.

After a very negative report from his doctor about his liver, and the increasing threat by his wife to leave, David made the decision to quit after twenty years of alcoholism. People who understand addictions know that this is an incredible feat, and that it says a lot about the strength and resolve of the person who is able to accomplish it.

As the conversation continued, I asked David how he handled situations like the social event we were attending. I was curious as to how he could maintain his composure in a room filled with people drinking alcohol, such as this one. The obvious smell of alcohol projecting from the breath of each person he spoke to must have been a reminder of his past. I would never recommend any of the marijuana addicts that I work with to take a leisurely stroll down the streets of Amsterdam where the smell of marijuana could easily trigger a relapse.

But, this type of scenario is much more likely to happen with the widespread use of alcohol than it is with most other drugs. It certainly makes it that much more difficult for the alcoholic.

David explained to me that even after four years, he struggles with his thoughts. This is obviously no surprise to those who are familiar with this process. In fact, he used a word that I believe perfectly articulates the feelings he experiences. He said that about once per month, as he drives past his local corner store where he used to purchase his nightly supply, he still has to “white-knuckle it” as he fights against the urge to pull into the parking lot. When he said this, I immediately had an overwhelming realization of how incredible of a human being I had standing in front of me. Over the last four years, David has had many opportunities to pull into that parking lot, but he has instead made the decision to continue driving by, “white-knuckles” included.

However, David did say something that I believe can be a dire mistake when the thoughts of temptation arise in the addict. He said he tries to ignore the thoughts when they arrive. We have all heard the saying “you can run, but you can’t hide.” This certainly applies to those nagging thoughts that most recovering addicts experience from time to time.

You can only run so long before you are forced to come face-to-face with the decision to use, or not to use. Instead, it may be easier for the addict to acknowledge the thought when it first arrives, and when it is at its weakest. Continuing to ignore the thoughts will only give it more power over you in time. It will essentially come down to a battle between the logical part of our brain, the pre-frontal cortex, and the emotional part, the limbic system.

It has been speculated that the limbic system operates 7X faster than the prefrontal cortex. Simply put, the beer, pill, or pipe may already be in your mouth way before your prefrontal cortex even knows what happened. Whether the estimation of 7X faster is exact or not, it is certainly true that the limbic system operates on a much speedier scale than the logical part of our brains. Given that most all addictions reside somewhere within the limbic system, this can be a real problem.

Many of the people I work with try to disregard any thoughts about marijuana. They feel that by avoiding or running from these thoughts,

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they will magically disappear. That usually isn’t the case with any drug of abuse. I personally experienced this with my many attempts at quitting marijuana. I had experiences where I felt like I wanted to pull my hair out, and others that were relatively easy. The easier times came toward the end when I finally realized not to live in fear when the thoughts came knocking at my door, but rather take action.

The emotional attachment we have to our drug of choice is part of the problem. This is totally normal. Most people will continue to have an unhealthy attachment to the drug when quitting. It was when I quit ignoring, and then ultimately acknowledged the random thoughts I was having about marijuana that quitting for good became a reality. I am not saying that by doing this quitting became easy. It is never easy and will remain one of the biggest challenges of anyone’s life. But, simply running from the thoughts increases the likelihood that you will eventually get caught.

Let me explain. Thoughts about the drug are very natural when people are trying to quit, especially in the beginning stages. How can it not be?

It has been a huge and, more than likely, the most important part of their life for quite some time. However, most people make the mistake of ignoring the thoughts as they happen. The fact is they really aren’t that bad at first, because most people are still riding on the emotional resolve to quit. But then comes the next thought…and then the next…and so on.

At the beginning, one little thought by itself isn’t enough to convince most people to start smoking or using a drug again. However, after ignoring hundreds of these thoughts, they begin to accumulate causing the addict to begin to fight or struggle with them. Once the fighting begins, so much energy is placed into the thoughts that they come more rapidly, eventually smothering the addict that by the time they realize it, there is a bong or a beer magically attached to their mouth.

But, what if we didn’t ignore or fight with these thoughts, and instead took the time to analyze them when they appear? What if we took action on the first appearance of the thought? Taking the time to recognize the lie behind what your “other-self” is attempting to convince you to do, and doing so in a timely manner, will provide you with a better chance at defeating this cascade of defeating thoughts.

Sometimes it is as simple enough as recognizing the thought, analyzing where it is coming from and the lie behind it. This may be all it takes to be able to discard the thought when it arrives. I also recommend staying as emotionally unattached while analyzing these thoughts. I teach marijuana addicts to examine the thoughts as the “non-smoker,” and not the “pot-smoker.” They are two different people.

The same applies with any addictive substance.

However, there are times when the addict will need to bring more tools to the game when these thoughts begin to surface. Remember, if we simply rely on those two parts of the brain to battle it out, we know which one typically wins. One method that is extremely important is to have a support group, or sponsor, as the additional voice. Too many times, especially with cannabis addicts, there is a maverick attitude of tackling this problem on their own. This is a huge mistake. Never allow pride to get in the way of your success with anything in life.

Another method to assist you during this time is having the ability to clearly recall your “reasons for quitting.” Our reasons for quitting are always valid, but we have a tendency to forget them when we begin to get uncomfortable with our decision. To help with this, I would create a card that has all of your reasons for quitting and carry that with you. When the thoughts arrive, review the card to help remind you of your “why.”

The point about all of this is to make sure the thoughts and cravings you experience do not overtake you. Either way, whether you struggle or not, the thoughts eventually begin to dissipate. But little techniques, such as these, make it more comfortable and can increase your success of winning.

Dr. Tony DeRamus is the author of “The Secret Addiction; Overcoming Your Marijuana Dependency” and is the President of SMA International, LLC, a company devoted to addressing the rampant abuse of marijuana worldwide through various mediums such as books, internet, and seminars. He also owns and operates one of the largest chiropractic clinics in North America.

Dr. DeRamus has devoted his life to helping others achieve personal success in both life, and their health and well-being.

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17

ENDING THE RELAPSE CYCLE USING ENERGY PSYCHOLOGY TECHNIQUES AND PROCESSES

By Suzanne Biddiscombe, M.A.

Everyone is born into a particular environment each with its own unique set of circumstances. Some are born into environments with both biological parents present. Others are raised by a single biological parent, by relatives, in a foster home or in an orphanage.

The environment you grew up in, the particular circumstances, combined with other life experiences has had a profound impact upon the formation of your identity. During the first six years of life you were highly impressionable, your existence likened to a perceptual sponge, with each experience encoded and stored subconsciously as a memory. All memories encoded in your subconscious mind are represented in pictures/slideshow, sounds, smells, tastes and feelings.

These memories tell your story and have influenced the formation of your beliefs, attitudes, preferences and habits. In fact most people have a wide variety of beliefs and preferences. Your emotions give all your memories great power. Some are happy remembrances such as favorite movies, favorite vacation spots, favorite relatives, favorite music, favorite smells, favorite foods, etc. More complex beliefs and emotions around subjects like religion, politics, and family traditions are also stored within the subconscious. The sum total of your journey is recorded within the subconscious part of your mind. How can you be sure that your subconscious mind exists? Well take a few moments right now and think of something you really enjoy doing. Or think of someone you love. Just notice how this happy memory shows up inside of you. The act of remembering accessed your subconscious and the stored happy memory was brought into your conscious awareness.

Now it is also true that every person without exception has memories and events that occurred in life that were unpleasant. Some of yours may have been quite traumatic involving physical, sexual or emotional abuse. Perhaps you grew up in an environment where addiction was prevalent. You may have grown up in a family where anger, control, criticism, or chaos ruled the environment, or in sharp contrast one where silence, a lack of affection and caring were prevalent. You may have been bullied in school, at home or in your neighborhood. You may have been raised in poverty with some of your most basic needs, such as food and shelter not assured. Maybe you knew you were gay and felt lonely and isolated. You may have witnessed violence in your home between your parents. You may have been continually criticized by a parent. The point here is that painful memories and unresolved emotions stay with you and disrupt your life. The unresolved emotions often build over time, leading to self-sabotage, including addictive behaviors. Trapped emotions and traumas, anxiety and unprocessed life experiences are held in the nervous system and the source of multiple problems.

When one experiences anxiety, depression, sadness, anger and other low level emotional states for long periods of time, when these emotions become who you think you are, Dr. Dispenza, a neuroscientist explains why: “our emotions are a record of the past.

So if the emotion is stored in the body then the body is literally living in the past”. What this means is that when the body serves as a recorder of the subconscious, the body believes and reflects the same environmental conditions of the past and its perceptions are reflected every day and every hour of the day. The body literally lives in the past running the same emotions and feelings, “molecules of emotion” experienced on a cellular level in the body leading to conditioned habitual responses to the point where the mind is no longer involved.

Someone with addictive tendencies often seeks relief through their drug of choice not just because temporary relief is better than no relief at all, but because they are operating from these conditioned emotional states and they are unpleasant.

So how do you get off the relapse merry go round? You must address the painful and traumatic memories from the past. These memories are giving structure to the sabotaging beliefs and the trapped emotions that “drive the bus” of your addictive reality. An effective key to dissolving painful past memories is an approach known as energy psychology.

Energy psychology combines principles of western psychology with principles of oriental medicine. Energy psychology techniques effectively and thoroughly address and dissolve the most painful past memories, while simultaneously fostering healthy emotional feelings and responses. Effective energy psychology techniques include: Faster

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EFT (Emotionally Focused Transformations), VRT (Visual Release Tap) and Matrix Reimprinting to name three. Faster EFT and VRT are offshoots of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) which has hundreds of clinical and observational studies highlighting its effectiveness in addressing and releasing PTSD, depression, anxiety, any addiction and chronic pain conditions, to name a few. Incorporating oriental medicine’s contribution and knowledge of the meridian system, which demonstrates how trapped emotions can be released through emotional acupressure or “tapping” has contributed to the growth of energy psychology.

There is a part of the brain that modulates emotional responses called the amygdala. When the amygdala perceives a real or imagined threat it mobilizes a fight-flight response in the body that is chemical and electromagnetic in nature. Signals travel through channels along the meridian system. Uncomfortable physiological sensations and feelings are experienced in the body while negative chemicals such as cortisol and adrenaline are released when this fight-flight stress response is activated. Scientists have discovered that the amygdala can become hypersensitive when someone is quite young, leading it to “sound the alarm” when a person simply anticipates a threat or when they just think about a past painful memory. Certain smells, tastes, and sounds can “trigger” a response from the amygdala. The subconscious tends to generalize the emotional impact of one event in life to other events and circumstances in life, so much so that it affects multiple areas of a person’s life. This stressful state of being has grave consequences over time for one’s general health and emotional well-being. Meridian “tapping” along with other processes effectively stops the alarm of the amygdala, while also assisting in the release of “trapped emotions” and limiting beliefs that stem from painful and traumatic memories from the past that drive addictive behaviors.

Suzanne Biddiscombe, M.A., owner of the Source for Change, has a Master’s in Psychology and is certified in multiple energy psychology techniques. She worked in addictive services in both inpatient and outpatient settings in New York for over eight years. She specializes in working with individuals who have been unable to stop relapse behaviors in her private office in Boca Raton, Florida. You may reach her at 561-300-4069.

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19

MARIJUANA-WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE? Dr. Michael J. De Vito

The cheers rang out and the pundits heralded the election results of November 2012. Exhilarated followers in college dorms, faculty lounges, and city parks across our nation had won their long sought victory. Others in less reported locations and less organized groups shook their heads in disbelief. Not due to the re-election of a President, but the legalization of recreational Marijuana in two western states, Washington and Colorado.

Cheetos, oatmeal cookies, and S’mores will soon be in short supply. With the possibility of more states to follow in upcoming referendums much of the nation will be looking close at the implementation and the results of this monumental shift in acceptable and now legal social behavior.

We all have our biases whether we label ourselves as Liberal, Conservative or Libertarian. Those biases can and often do cloud the facts available before us and our willingness to take an objective look. We are led in the direction of our own world view. The more liberal among us may see the use of Marijuana to be relatively harmless and not worth the time, money and effort to criminalize and prosecute its use. The more conservative mind set will perhaps make the case that a society has the right to codify conduct and that includes maintaining laws against all non-medical use of Marijuana. The libertarian may believe even small government has the potential to infringe on our individual rights. Such as legislating on private behavior and an adult citizen’s right to cultivate, distribute, use or possess Marijuana in any amount. I would like to leave my own biases behind, at least for the moment, and take a look at some of the history and research relating to the societal and health effects of Marijuana use.

Is Marijuana harmless? The National Organization for Marijuana Reform Law (NORML) makes that very claim. They even substantiate the claim by citing the highly respected British Medical Journal, Lancet, November 11, 1995 “The smoking of cannabis, even long-term is not harmful to health… it would be reasonable to judge smoking cannabis as less of a threat than alcohol and tobacco”. Very direct and concise, however, we find that the quote is from an opinion editorial and not a peer reviewed article. NORML’s bias and world view is leading their agenda. An opposing view regarding the harm and value of Marijuana is held by Citizens against Legalizing Marijuana (CALM). CALM states that Marijuana is a mind altering, highly toxic drug.

They cite various concerns by medical societies and associations including the British Medical Association who CALM quotes as saying “Marijuana has been linked to a greater risk of heart disease, lung cancer, bronchitis and emphysema.” The BMA goes on to raise concerns that downgrading the criminal status of Marijuana would “mislead’ the public into believing the drug is safe. CALM is presenting information that supports their agenda and world view, and from some of the same sources as NORML. No wonder the public becomes confused and ends up returning to their personal bias and agenda regarding Marijuana legalization. Who is right? What side has reasonable and valid support from existing research and empirical data?

Cannabis contains over four hundred chemicals. The most notable for its psychoactive effect is THC which is present in the resin near the flowering tops of the female cannabis plant. The sacred writings from India, over three thousand years ago, made note of the headache and stress reduction benefits of Marijuana. They considered it one of the five sacred plants. THC has been found in the internal organs of Egyptian mummies and records show that the Chinese have cultivated the plant for fiber and its medicinal effects well over two thousand years ago. Marijuana use has been with us for quite some time.

Over the past 2 decades we have discovered receptor sites in specific regions of the brain such as the Hippocampus, Cerebellum, Basal Ganglia, Limbic Systems and other reward centers that were receptive and compatible with the THC molecule present in Marijuana. Therefore, as with the discovery of the opiate receptor prior to the discovery of endorphins, it follows that we must have an endogenous neurotransmitter similar to THC that has some benefit to our physiologic function. Two such neurotransmitters so far have been found, Anandamide and 2-AG. Both found shortly after detecting the brain’s cannabinoid receptor sites and more may soon be discovered.

We use Marijuana for its physical, mental and emotional effect. These effects are both short term and long term. The research and empirical data tend to indicate that those effects can be brief and slightly beneficial but can also be highly detrimental over the short and long term. Let’s take a look at some possible benefits. One of the short term benefits is physical relaxation, euphoria and sedation, the primary desired effect by the recreational user. Marinol, the synthesized form of THC has been shown to have a positive effect on reducing nausea, enhancing appetite and the eventual weight gain of cancer patients on chemotherapy. Other beneficial therapeutic uses may be with Glaucoma,

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although the benefit is short term, and alleviating some of the symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis. All seem to be a reasonable and valid benefit, a benefit that supports a medical use for Marijuana, in the pharmaceutical form.

The detrimental effects of the use of Marijuana would be disruptions in short term memory and the inability to store and retain new information. THC remains in the brain 2 to 3 days after use resulting in a distorted cognitive function during that time. Since THC is fat soluble a past user can, and in my practice has, tested positive for THC even after stopping use for a month or more. With that in mind how do we test for impairment with drivers, machine operators, healthcare or travel personnel in states that have legalized recreational Marijuana? In other words, how do we know when they are under the influence? Other long term negative effects of Marijuana and its four hundred associated chemicals, including significant levels of the carcinogen Benzopyrene, are chronic respiratory conditions such as bronchitis and emphysema. Marijuana use increases heart rate by about 30% and reduces heart pumping efficiency. Studies have suggested that the risk of heart attack can increase up to 4 times normal shortly after Marijuana use. Other studies have found immune system deficiencies due to Marijuana leading to possible increases in severity and rates of infection.

Alterations in the reproductive systems in both men and women have been shown as a result of the suppression of reproductive hormones.

Is Marijuana Addictive? Addiction is proportional to the degree that a substance or an activity will stimulate the reward system of the brain, primarily the Midbrain, the Nucleus Accumbens, and the Limbic System.

Marijuana is not the equivalent of Heroin, Alcohol or even Cocaine in the degree and potential for defined clinical addiction. However, we know that THC stimulates the brain’s reward system. Therefore, it follows that the greater the frequency of Marijuana use and the higher the potency of THC, through improved cultivation of the product or increased resin concentration as in Hashish, the greater the potential risk for addiction. I see Marijuana addiction in my practice on a regular basis. It can manifest various symptoms of withdrawal such as anxiety, restlessness, tremors, and insomnia in those who have had increased concentrations and frequency of use over time. Yes, Marijuana is addictive. Marijuana is addictive to the Mind, to the Body, and to the Spirit.

Is Marijuana a Gateway Drug? It is for some and it is not for others. Did The Illustrated Man begin with one Tattoo? Yes, but everyone who gets a tattoo does not end up with full body ink. Even in abuse and addiction we eventually choose our drug of choice. The Marijuana user may stay with that drug or stop completely. They may partner it with another drug of a different physiologic effect such as Alcohol, Nicotine or Methamphetamines.

They may discard Marijuana totally and move on to other drugs or behaviors that provide a change in physical, mental and emotional states. I would refer you to an article I wrote in the October 2013 issue of The Sober World Magazine, page 10, entitled Family, Personality, Brain Chemistry and Addiction. I discuss why and how we discover our drug of choice. Why every addict is not addicted to everything, just some things. Now we are back with the question at hand. Should Marijuana be legal for recreational use? Two states have voted yes. Where do we go from here? You will have to decide for yourself and you may have to do it before the next election. For what it may be worth I will give you my opinion on the subject.

We are not winning the war on drugs and as a nation I don’t believe we ever will. We only win this war by being responsible informed individuals and setting standards, based on our moral and ethical foundations. I believe the recreational use of Marijuana is, and eventually will lead to, destructive behavior. The destructive effects of that behavior extend beyond the individual user. As citizens we have the right to debate and to determine the type of society we want to live in.

I believe a society willing to tolerate and condone destructive behavior is a society in decline. Therefore, I am against the legalization of recreational Marijuana. It will not take long to see whether I am right or wrong.

Dr. Michael J. De Vito is a diplomate and is board certified in Addictionology. He has been an instructor of Medical Ethics, Clinical Pathology, Anatomy and Physiology at the College of Southern Nevada.

He is the founder and program director of NewStart Treatment Center located in Henderson, Nevada. He is presently in private practice helping patients from all parts of the world attain and successfully live a life of recovery from substance abuse and addictive behavior. NewStart Treatment Center utilizes a drug free and natural approach to addiction treatment. www.4anewstart.com Dr. De Vito is the author of Addiction: The Master Keys to Recovery www.AddictionRecoveryKeys.com

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Sunset House is currently classified as a level 4 transitional care house, according to the Department of Children and Families criteria regarding such programs. This includes providing 24 hour paid staff coverage seven days per week, requires counseling staff to never have a caseload of more than 15 participating clients. Sunset House maintains this licensure by conducting three group therapy sessions per week as well as one individual counseling session per week with qualified staff. Sunset House provides all of the above mentioned services for $300.00 per week. This also includes a bi-monthly psychiatric session with Dr. William Romanos for medication management. Sunset House continues to be a leader in affordable long term care and has been providing exemplary treatment in the Palm Beach County community for over 18 years.

As a Level 4 facility Sunset House is appropriate for persons who have completed other levels of residential treatment, particularly levels 2 and 3. This includes clients who have demonstrated problems in applying recovery skills, a lack of personal responsibility, or a lack of connection to the world of work, education, or family life. Although clinical services are provided, the main emphasis is on services that are low-intensity and typically emphasize a supportive environment.

This would include services that would focus on recovery skills, preventing relapse, improving emotional functioning, promoting personal responsibility and reintegrating the individual into the world of work, education, and family life.

In conjunction with DCF, Sunset House also maintains The American Society of Addiction Medicine or ASAM criteria. This professional society aims to promote the appropriate role of a facility or physician in the care of patients with a substance use disorder. ASAM was created in 1988 and is an approved and accepted model by The American Medical Association and looks to monitor placement criteria so that patients are not placed in a level of care that does not meet the needs of their specific diagnosis.

Additionally, DCF has mandated that all providers abide by state laws which prohibit patient brokering. This is defined as the solicitation or recieivng of any form of commission, bonus, rebate, kickback or bribe in cash or any kind in return for referring patients or patronage to or from a health care provider or facility. These actions are strictly forbidden and are punishable as a criminal offense as well as strict administration action.

The following of these requirements and licensing standards allows for any given facility to be continually monitored for adherence to these laws, in essence protecting the patients with the sole ethical aim to do no harm.

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21

SIBLINGS... THE FORGOTTEN ONES

By Joe Herzanek

The Parable of the Prodigal Son While he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming.

Filled with compassion the father ran to the son, threw his arms around him and said, “Welcome home.”

His son had come to his senses.

Let’s have a party!

His brother refused to come to the party even after his father pleaded with him to join them.

“I’ve stayed here all these years and never caused a problem.

No one ever had a party for me,” said the brother.

–paraphrased from the Gospel of Luke Siblings often find themselves caught in the middle of the recovery process. In the story of the prodigal son, a father waits and watches expectantly for the return of his wayward child. The boy left home and not only squandered his inheritance, but also wasted a big chunk of his life. But there is so much more to the story. As we take a closer look at the entire family, we see that “the rest of the story” can apply to families and siblings today who are struggling with the early stages of recovery.

I know from firsthand experience how siblings can suffer. During my addiction, I was blind to how my actions were affecting my brother and two sisters. Actually, the entire family did not understand what was happening.

Even now, more than thirty years later, some members of my family remain bitter, and we have never been able to resolve those hard feelings.

There is only so much time in any given day and when there is one high-maintenance family member, often the other children are neglected. Parents have a limited amount of energy for each day, and then they reach a point of exhaustion. In my case, which again is not unique, I received more than my share of attention. I, like many other addicts, was a very needy person. My life was one crisis after another. There were many occasions when I needed money. I drained my parents of their finances as well as their time and energy. Who suffered? At the time, it was far from obvious, but as I look back it is clear that my brother and sisters—basically good, low-maintenance kids were the innocent victims.

Mom and Dad spent a lot of their parenting energy either helping me with a problem or worried about what I might do next; they were even afraid to answer the phone. They couldn’t be in two places at once, physically or mentally. As a result, my siblings did not receive nearly the amount of attention they deserved. My parents missed their school programs and sports games because of my problems, and holidays were often ruined. Much of the focus was on Joe, and I was messing up my life while my brother and sisters were left striving to do the right thing and gain my parents’ approval and attention.

To make matters worse, my parents’ attention continued to be focused on me for a long time into my recovery. My siblings had to hear over and over, isn’t it great that Joe’s quit using drugs? How wonderful that Joe is clean and sober. Joe has been drug-free for a year now “let’s celebrate!” These sort of comments continued, even after everything should have been back to normal. Talk about rubbing psychological salt in a wound; my brother and sisters must have been ready to puke. At that time, none of us had a clue how this would ultimately affect our future relationships.

Insidious: working or spreading harmfully in a subtle or stealthy manner. awaiting a chance to entrap; treacherous. harmful but enticing.

Developing so gradually as to be well established before becoming apparent. (Webster’s Dictionary) It was only after years of recovery and study on this topic that this realization came to me. Because of this disease’s slow progression, few families are aware of the effect addiction has on the family as a whole. Few addicts think of making amends toward those who did not appear to be directly affected.

When I entered treatment many years ago, there was not much emphasis placed on the importance of family in the recovery process. Today, this is a key component in most treatment programs.

Parents and siblings are strongly encouraged to be part of the process.

Some centers will even offer what is called Family Week. This is a time

22

for those who have been negatively affected to become involved in the recovery process. Many times family members will refuse to get involved: “He/she had the problem, not me. And now you are asking me to get counseling? You must be crazy.” Nonetheless, I strongly suggest that family members attend some meetings–if for no other reason than to vent frustration. It will be worth it.

Addiction is treacherous for the whole family. Over time, relationships can become a tangled web. Feelings get hurt and bitterness creeps in, almost unnoticed. Strife begins to build, and after a while no one remembers why. But life is too short to waste years like this. Miracles can happen when a professional helps untangle the mess.

Time has yet to heal some of the wounds in my family. The impact of my addiction and recovery has left deep scars, and damaged relationships among my immediate family that we are still attempting to understand and mend. Despite our attempts to keep things simple, life can sometimes become very complicated. Over the years, my siblings have married. Bitterness and unresolved strife have colored relationships not only among my siblings, but among our spouses and children as well.

Recovery and the process of making amends to those who were hurt takes a while. Sometimes these differences may never be resolved.

Quitting, as wonderful as that may be, is not the same as recovering.

Recovery means taking responsibility for the broken relationships that occurred when the addict was using. Repairing broken relationships is critical to the process of recovery. With patience and time, progress can be made.

This article excerpted from the book Why Don’t They Just Quit?

Joe Herzanek has spent over twenty years working in the criminal justice system counseling and ministering to inmates and is an expert on recovery from drug and alcohol addiction. He also is a Certified Family Addiction Counselor, author of the award-winning book “Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.” and founder of “Changing Lives Foundation.”

See more at: www.drug-addiction-help-now.org/blog/2011/11/ siblings-the-forgotten-ones/#sthash.jhSFtczp.dpuf

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23

RISING STAR DIMMED BY ADDICTION

By John Giordano DHL, MAC

On New Years day, pop star Ke$ha released the music video for her sure to be new hit song, Dirty Love. I applaud her but not for the reasons you might think. A couple of days after the release, Ke$ha went to rehab for an eating disorder. As she put it, “I’ll be unavailable for the next 30 days, seeking treatment for my eating disorder ... to learn to love myself again, exactly as I am.” Ke$ha follows in the footsteps of many high profile stars like Lady Gaga, Madonna and Demi Lovato who have not only recognized their own addictions but who have also come forward publicly so that others don’t suffer the way that they have. It is for this reason that I applaud Ke$ha and other celebrities who have shown the courage to be open and honest about their personal issues to better the world.

Process Addictions, such as food addiction and eating disorders, have similar affects in the brain as drugs and can be just as devastating.

This was a big topic at the 1st International Conference on Behavioral Addictions in Budapest Hungry where I spoke on Holistic Addiction Treatment last year. Process Addictions have become interwoven into the fabric of our society. You can’t walk through the checkout line in a grocery store without seeing a bulimic, anorexic or binging movie stars’ picture splattered across the covers of the tabloids. The sight might be a good ploy to sell papers and magazines but it also is sending the wrong image to America’s youth.

Bulimia, anorexia, food addiction and other process addictions are beyond obsessive, compulsive and impulsive behaviors that become a danger to an individual and/or the people around them. They have been growing unnoticed in the shadows of their big brother, substance abuse. These addictive behaviors were once thought to be minor addictions compared to drug and alcohol abuse. Yet new scientific evidence is now emerging suggesting process addictions has a similar effect on brain function resulting in aberrant behavior.

Over the years I’ve worked closely with Dr. Kenneth Blum in developing evidenced-based modalities that were subsequently scientifically proven to be effective. Dr. Blum is a noted geneticist who discovered the reward gene – a/k/a the addiction gene (DRD2-A1) – nearly twentyfive years ago. It was the single most significant seminal discovery in addiction in quite some time, quite possibly ever. Dr. Blum’s revelation changed the way we view and treat addiction. However the results of Dr. Blum’s work spans much further than drug abuse.

Perhaps one of Dr. Blum’s greatest contributions to modern medicine is his discovery of Reward Deficiency Syndrome (RDS). Dopamine (DA) is the primary neurotransmitter of reward and pleasure. DA is one of the “feel good” chemicals produced in the brain. It’s the neurochemical that puts a smile on our face and a song in our hearts. Among other things, Dopamine controls our likes and dislikes, and influences our emotions.

When our brains are functioning properly, DA communicates the sense of calm and wellbeing throughout the brain. It enables us not only to see rewards, but to take action to move toward them. However when levels of this “feel good” chemical are low or blocked from the brain’s receptors; stress, pain, discomfort and agitation are the result. This condition is called “Reward Deficiency Syndrome”. On one side of RDS you’ll find alcohol and drug abuse while on the other you find food addiction and other process addictions. The operative word here is addiction.

People who have RDS almost always compensate for the lack of Dopamine in one way or another. It’s not a conscious effort but rather a subconscious response. By nature we’re all creatures of habit. We repeat actions that once gave us pleasure or – as our subconscious views it – a reward. For this conversation I’m going to use a donut as an example. It may taste pretty much to same to everyone who samples it. But the Dopamine challenged individual will find that eating a donut will lift their mood and get their brain chemistry closer to normal. Although temporary, the sugar – and carbohydrates that metabolize into sugar – are effective in activating the Reward System, thus lifting one’s spirits and improving cognitive function. People who have RDS are not necessarily eating because they’re hungry, but to balance their brain chemistry so they feel

24

normal. Dr. Blum says it only takes a matter of minutes for sugar to affect the brain after it hits the tongue.

The down side to all of this is that the spike is just that; a quick high followed by an equally quick low. This leaves a person to experience in this case, food cravings and a need to search out new food sources to sedate the appetite. It’s easy to see how someone could get caught up in a Dopamine loop when they squelch their cravings with foods that only provide a short-term spike. The obvious answer is eating healthy, balanced and low-glycemic meals throughout the course of the day with sugar free-snacks in between. But even this plan comes with a caveat.

Nutrition is to often over looked in our fast paced lives. Sure everyone eats enough to get their daily calories but what about the all important vitamins and minerals our body and brain needs. Ke$ha is a selfproclaimed vegetarian, which begs the question: is she getting the proper nourishment in her diet? Too much emphasis is placed on our personal appearances when considering diet food choices and rarely enough on nutrition. The body is a complex mechanism and the brain is even more intricate. Nutrition is the fuel that keeps the machine functioning properly. The simple fact is that it is nearly impossible to get all of our nutritional requirements from the food we eat.

This is one of the motivating factors that lead me to formulate my own supplements designed to improve mental health. I’ve always been an advocate for nutritional supplements. I first saw the value in supplements when I was training for National Karate Championships.

They gave me a bit of a physical edge over my opponents. It was years later that I came to learn how important supplements were to brain chemistry. Scientific research has shown that certain amino acids are essential for a properly functioning brain. Deficiencies in amino acids can contribute to chronic illnesses, anxiety, depression, alertness, attention span, learning, memory and general mood.

Over twenty-years ago I began formulating supplements to suit the mental and emotional needs of my clients from the finest raw materials available. Nutra Clarity (amino based) has become the most popular among health minded individuals. It is scientifically proven to create a sense of calm and wellbeing. People taking Nutra Clarity claim they feel an overall lift both mentally and physically.

It’s easy to look in from the outside at Pop Stars like Ke$ha and think what a great life she has. Who wouldn’t want to be loved by so many and have more money in the bank at twenty-six than most people will see in a lifetime. It’s what we don’t see that may be driving her eating disorder. Behind the glitz and glamour, Ke$ha and other popular artists are under a lot of stress. They have very little down time compared to when they were not famous. The rigors of their daily lives over an extended period of time produce a prolonged stress that eventually depletes Dopamine. This alone could manifest itself into a food addiction.

With all of this being said, I can’t hold all these people completely accountable for their food addiction. Often in drug addiction you’ll find someone close to the addict that helps secure drugs. They’re called enablers. As more information has comes to light, I’m beginning to realize the extent of involvement that the food industry has in food addictions. Has the food industry become the enabler of the American public’s food addiction?

Glucose is brain fuel. When the brain needs energy it turns on a switch that sets into motion a search for foods to satisfy the needs. When enough food has been consumed with the necessary amounts of sugar, the switch in the brain is turned off and the quest for food ends.

Yet what I find most concerning is high fructose corn syrup; an inexpensive sugar substitute made from corn. It has replaced sugar in nearly everything we eat including soda, fast foods and processed foods. It’s a trillion dollar industry. High fructose corn syrup also provides the brain and body with the energy it needs, but it doesn’t have an off switch. It literally fools the brain into thinking it needs more Continued on page 26

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25

SPECIAL HELP FOR NURSES WITH ADDICTIONS

By Marlene Passell

The American Nurses Association estimated that approximately 10 percent of nurses are dependent on drugs or alcohol or both, making the incidence of drug abuse and addiction among nurses consistent with that of the U.S. population. With nearly three million RNs employed in the U.S, that means almost 300,000 RNs may be substance abusers; put another way, if you work with 10 nurses, one of them is likely to be struggling with addiction.

Wayside House is an addiction recovery program for women, by women in Delray Beach. For more information, call 561.278.0055 or see our website at www.waysidehouse.net Marlene Passell is the Marketing & Communications Manager at Wayside House

Addicted individuals feel tremendous shame and guilt, and fear losing their reputations, jobs, family, and friends, say the experts. Drug addiction is even more devastating for healthcare practitioners: It is a breach of professional ethics, places patients at risk, and can affect the reputations of the facilities where they work. Nurses can be particularly hard on themselves and colleagues who may be addicted.

When nurses are found diverting drugs or report themselves as many do, they face the Board of Nursing and must contract to complete a five-year stint in the Intervention Project for Nurses (IPN) at a location designated to offer the services, such as Delray Beach’s Wayside House. The addicted nurses must attend a weekly therapeutic session, check in regularly, and submit to random drug screenings.

Danielle Hecker MSW, a Wayside House therapist who leads the IPN program there, said the weekly sessions are individualized to meet the needs of each woman, depending on the severity of their addiction and other issues that surface that led to the addiction. When nurses first enter IPN, they may be required to refrain from nursing practice during the evaluation phase. Nurses are encouraged to focus on themselves and then they can begin rebuilding their careers – first doing case management or other non-patient work. The nurse may return to nursing practice with approval from treatment providers and IPN group facilitators. Then later they are encouraged to return to working with patients, said Ms. Hecker.

She said she currently sees seven nurses with addictions in the IPN program – some have been there a month, others three and four years. Ms. Hecker continues to see the nurses weekly for up to five years. She said IPN is a huge and much-needed program nationally and, that while a variety of local agencies are designated to provide it, “women like to come here because it’s only women. I think that’s crucial – many face grief and loss, violence and trauma specific to women. Many have become friends through this program; that’s so important and that’s what this program is all about.” she said.

The IPN program is not a replacement for Alcoholics or Narcotics Anonymous and the nurses attend those, as well. Most live on their own, some in halfway houses for a while.

Why is addiction such a problem within the nursing field? “Drugs and alcohol are everywhere and nurses have such easy access to narcotics in medical settings. We have to have a way to help our nurses and IPN is a wonderful program. The whole system is a great way to get them back into the system, advocate for themselves, and recognize their importance,” Ms. Hecker said.

If you are a nurse and need the IPN program, call Wayside House at 561.278.0055 and come in for an assessment on any Tuesday and let us know you’re there for IPN. Orientation is at 9:45 a.m.; the meetings at 10 a.m., followed by the individual assessment.

Has Ms. Hecker seen successes? Many, she said, referring to one client who came in very depressed and angry. Ms. Hecker referred her to a therapist at Wayside House who saw that the woman was actually clinically depressed and used anger “to cope with the world.” “She participated in the IPN group, came back for weekly therapy sessions, got through her trauma, saw the on-staff psychiatrist for weekly medication management to cope with her depression, reunited with her family out of state, got a job, and is completing her IPN group up north. What a transformation.”

26

RISING STAR DIMMED

BY ADDICTION

By John Giordano DHL, MAC

Continued from page 24

food. A person’s blood sugar levels could be in a normal range or even elevated and that individual would still be craving food. For all intent and purposes, if you eat food containing high fructose corn, it will make you want to eat more.

It’s been recently said that more meals are being designed in laboratories than in kitchens. There is a reason for that – sugar is addictive and is being added to just about every processed food we consume. Sugar and fructose corn syrup stimulates the production of the ‘feel good’ chemicals that affects our behavior and elevates our mood. When sugar is restricted, people experience withdrawals similar to drug abusers, although not as intense. The food industry has known this for quite some time. Yet not only is the food industry continuing their ethically questionable practice, but they’re expanding it at the expense of the American public’s health.

Throughout my counseling career I have – and continue to – work with people just like Ke$ha who are getting control of their food and weight issues. Food addiction is no laughing matter and should be taken seriously.

About John Giordano DHL, MAC: Weight loss was one of the driving forces that inspirited me to open Laser Therapy Spa and Wellness Center. Nutra Clarity and my other supplements are available to the public here as well.

John is a counselor, President and Founder of the National Institute for Holistic Addiction Studies, Laser Therapy Spa in Hallandale Beach and Chaplain of the North Miami Police Department. For the latest development in cutting-edge treatment check out his website: www.holisticaddictioninfo.com

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27

DISSOCIATION AND ADDICTION: THE DILEMMA OF EMOTION

By Erik J Welsh Ph.D

Here I am observing the occurrence of addiction as both an individual and collective experience. Addiction can be seen as a cyclical, chronic compulsion overwhelming the psyche to seek and use regardless of the consequence. I view the phenomenon of addiction from a theoretical lens, primarily influenced by Jungian psychology and psychodynamic theory. Here the intention is to discuss an aspect of the addictive experience through theory, as this will allow for the theory to “establish (some) truth: A theory gives meaning by helping us make sense of what we see, hear, feel, smell, or taste (empirical reality) and even of what we cannot experience by means of our senses, that is, metaphysics” (Rutgers, 2012, p. 458).

Focusing on experience, which is a broadly set term to discuss addiction, allows for a variety of discussions to unfold. When discussing experience, the meaning is not only in regards to conscious psychological content, but also the unconscious content, as we are not affected solely by what we are conscious of. An individual is also affected by what he or she is unconscious of, or unaware of. Speaking of addiction as an experience, I will briefly introduce the conceptualization of emotion in regard to addiction, and the psychological estrangement, or dissociative states, as an occurrence that exists in addiction.

The relevance of emotion when discussing addiction lies in the interplay between emotion, the ego, and the shadow. Addiction as an experience is dissociative, so the attention is brought to how emotions impact an individual in addiction, or as seen through Jungian psychology, how the collisions of an ego result in overpowering emotions. Dissociation is not necessarily pathological, and the dissociative experiences are certainly not delusional, as the individual retains insight. Dissociation is a primary defense utilized by the ego. Material is separated and compartmentalized in order to keep what is psychologically threatening, or intolerable, out of awareness.

In this way, dissociation keeps us safe, because it keeps us from becoming too overwhelmed, allowing our minds and bodies to continue functioning to some degree.

Addiction, I believe, can be conceptualized through dissociation.

The dissociative states that I am referring to are depersonalization, an individual’s separation from a sense of personal identity, and derealization, a detachment from reality, or the external environment.

Through addiction there is a separation, an estrangement from both self and environment. It is as though the addiction places a buffer between the person and their identity, and between the person and the rest of the world. Lastly, observing the existence of emotion, Jung (1951/1979) informed that emotion “is not an activity of the individual but something that happens to him [her]” (pg. 9).

The ego is essentially necessary for the existence of personality. The ego discerns what psychological experience or information is to be conscious or relegated to the shadow, distant from awareness. The ego is what sorts through and categorizes the tolerable from intolerable in terms of psychological content. However, if dissociation is occurring, then the individual’s perception of what they are able to tolerate is actually a façade, because the addiction is masking and convoluting the individual’s perception and sense of self. First, to clarify the meaning of ego, Jung (1951/1979) explains: We understand the ego as the complex factor to which all conscious contents are related. It forms, as it were, the centre of the field of consciousness; and, in so far as this comprises the empirical personality, the ego is the subject of all personal acts of consciousness. The relation of a psychic content to ego forms the criterion of its consciousness, for no content can be conscious unless it is represented to a subject (p. 3).

The addiction allows for intolerable experiences to be kept out of awareness. In this way, dissociative states develop and are reinforced through the process of addiction. The estrangement from the environment and from one’s identity depicts dissociative states sustained through addiction, which cause a continuous relegation of psychological content to be diverted towards the shadow; an occurrence that is continuous and is maintained through the continued engagement of addiction. Addiction allows for the ego to

28

remain seemingly functional, existent in a false belief of volition. The intolerable psychological content is still being experienced, but it is being diverted to the shadow within the unconscious. What happens, then, when the dissociative process is disrupted when the individual stops using? This process will shift dramatically, and the ego may then find itself flooded by material that it is perhaps unprepared to manage.

The theoretical concept of the shadow “is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real” (Jung, 1951/1979, p. 8). The dark aspects are what an individual does not want to recognize as factual aspects in regard to themselves. We all have these “dark aspects,” the parts of ourselves that we are not proud of and would rather not acknowledge as a part of who we are. Though the chosen definition of shadow mentions a moral problem, let us avoid the assumptions that addiction is a moral problem.

The significance of the shadow lies in what happens when the individual is no longer using. The ego will be overwhelmed by material, be it emotions, memories, or thoughts and sensations that it had previously been able to relegate to a dark corner and not look at. The crucial point to take home is that within the addictive process, the shadow is harboring a deluge of emotional material that has been fermenting, waiting for a way past the gatekeeper (the ego).

As unconscious content begins to seep into awareness, significance of the shadow and its role on the impact of emotion through the addictive process becomes more evident. As the ego attempts to maintain its control and perspective, more and more material is then relegated into the unconscious, fermenting and held within the shadow. This makes the ego more vulnerable to the energy of the unconscious, and by attempts to maintain a sense of balance; the unconscious content is brought into the ego’s awareness through symptomology. To clarify, the psyche attempts to maintain equilibrium, a homeostatic state. In order to maintain a sense of homeostasis, the unconscious will offset the psychological imbalance by unbinding masses that have accumulated within the shadow. The individual is striving to avoid such content, resulting in a psychological tension that inevitably causes symptomatic reactions. Additionally, the material of the shadow can be projected onto the environment. It is the projection of the shadow which separates the ego, the individual from the environment. Here aspects of the shadow are then interpreted as something separate and other, rather than what is a part of the individual.

In conclusion, we now have a foundation upon which we can conceptualize what an emotional experience may be for the individual in addiction. The dilemma of emotion in the addictive process, then, is in how the psychological content can essentially take over the individual. The emotion seemingly floods awareness, consuming the individual. Understand that we are discussing only a fragment of what is termed addiction. When the unconscious material, often in the form of emotion, emerge and overwhelm the individual, the temptation can be to revert to the addictive process and use in order to dissociate from this deluge. Such an event leads to an individual’s realization of his or her loss of volition; here the individual does not govern the addiction, it is the addiction that governs the individual. Aside from the possibility of addiction existing to avoid emotions, let us then consider the emotions that develop from within the experience of addiction as well. As there is importance in how, why, etc., an addiction began, there is a need to understand what has developed from within the addiction, and provide such support and containment for the process as a whole.

Article references are available upon request Erik J. Welsh, PhD received his PhD in Clinical Psychology with an emphasis in Depth Psychology from Pacifica Graduate Institute.

Dr. Welsh has been working in the field of psychology since 2003 and specializes in addiction and trauma treatment. He draws from a psychodynamic orientation with an emphasis in Jungian theory. Dr. Welsh is also the author of the blog, The Addiction Complex, a Jungian hermeneutic blog exploring psychodynamic concepts focusing on both philosophical and psychological topics of addiction, symbolism, trauma, and other related material.

ADV E RT I S I N G O P P O RT U N I T I E S

The Sober World is a free magazine for parents and families who have loved ones struggling with addiction. We offer an E-version of the magazine monthly. If you are interested in having a copy e-mailed, please send your request to patricia@thesoberworld.com For Advertising opportunities in our magazine or on our website, please contact Patricia at 561-910-1943.

We invite you to visit our website at www.thesoberworld.com You will find an abundance of helpful information from resources and services to important links, announcements, gifts, books and articles from contributors throughout the country.

There is an interactive forum where we invite and encourage you to voice your opinion, share your thoughts and experiences.

We strongly encourage those in recovery and seeking recovery to join the forums as well.

Please note: Our forum allows you to leave comments anonymously.

Please visit us on Face Book at The Sober World or Sober-World Steven Again, I would like to thank all my advertisers that have made this magazine possible, and have given us the ability to reach people around the world that are affected by drug or alcohol abuse. I can’t tell you all the people that have reached out to thank us for providing this wonderful resource.

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29

ISABEL

By Rabbi Dr. Abraham J. Twerski

Continued from page 6

“You want him to put $10,000 in cash in the basket?” I asked.

was her only option.

“Yes,” was the answer. “But if he’s not in the program, they might return it to him.”

I am indebted to Isabel for bringing me to the twelve step programs.

What was the crisis that brought her to the emergency room that day? There was no crisis. Why then did she seek an emergency appointment just on the day I was on emergency duty? Perhaps she was sent there to introduce me to AA. But who could have sent her?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Never before and never since have I come across an organization that refuses donations.

My fascination with AA brought me back to more meetings. As I became familiar with the twelve steps for recovery, I concluded that they were a formula for mature, responsible living. There was nothing unique about alcoholics that made the twelve steps specific for them. I found that virtually every character defect that can be found in alcoholics can also be found in non-alcoholics, albeit they may be less pronounced. The twelve steps were a way for proper living, and I could apply them to myself.

So began my involvement with AA. I have attended meetings in many cities in the United States and in many countries I have visited. I can find friends in a community where I do not know a single person.

What about the secret of Isabel’s motivation to put herself into a state hospital? I never did solve that mystery in the thirteen years of therapy. I was left to my own devices to guess at it, and here is what I think.

Do you know how a volcano is formed? Deep down at the core of the earth, there is melted rock that is under extreme pressure.

Over many centuries, this lava slowly makes its way through fissures in the earth’s crust to the surface. Once it breaks through the surface, the lava erupts.

I believe that at the core of every human being there is a nucleus of self-respect and dignity. For a variety of reasons, this nucleus may be concealed and suppressed. Like the lava, it seeks to break through the surface and be recognized. Once it breaks through into a person’s awareness, one may feel, “I am too good to be acting this way. This behavior is beneath my dignity.” I think this is the “spiritual awakening” to which the twelfth step refers.

I think that this is what happened to Isabel. For years she had been blind to her self-worth and saw nothing wrong with her alcoholic behavior. Then one day, the nucleus of self-respect that had been buried deep within her broke through the surface, and she realized that she had no right to demean herself.

Why the state hospital? Let me share a personal experience.

I do most of my writing early in the morning when my mind is rested. One time the publisher told me that they were moving up the publishing date and that I had to complete the book sooner.

That meant that I had to get up an hour earlier.

I set my alarm clock for 4:30. When it rang, I did what most people would do: I turned it off for just five minutes more of sleep. Of course, I woke up two hours later.

Several months later, I had to deliver a lecture in Washington, D.C. at 10 AM, which required my taking a 7 AM flight. To make this flight I had to be up at 5 AM. I set the alarm clock for 5 AM, but remembering my tendency to turn it off for “just five minutes” more of sleep, I realized that I might miss my flight. I took the alarm clock off the night stand and set it in the far corner of the room so that I could not turn it off from the bed. The next morning I awoke at 5 AM and walked across the room to turn off the alarm. I was then able to stay awake and make the flight.

On both occasions I had an awakening. The first awakening did not last long, because I went back to sleep. The second time I did something to avoid going right back to sleep. I made the awakening last.

Some people may have a spiritual awakening, but it does not last. Isabel knew that unless she took some measure to make her awakening last, she was likely to revert to drinking. The only way she knew to keep her awakening alive was to put herself out of reach of alcohol for an extended period of time. The state hospital

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For over four decades, Dr. Twerski, an ordained rabbi, held a pulpit until 1959 when he graduated from Marquette University Medical School and went on to complete his psychiatric residency at the University of Pittsburgh Western Psychiatric Institute. In 1972 Dr. Twerski and the Sisters of St. Francis first opened Gateway Rehab as a 28-day alcohol and drug dependence treatment center.

Gateway Rehab has thrived under the guiding spirit and expert leadership of founder and medical director emeritus, Dr. Abraham J. Twerski, an internationally respected authority on the treatment of alcohol and other drug dependencies.

Dr. Twerski is the author of more than 60 books, including collaborations with the late Charles Schulz, creator of the Peanuts characters. His latest book is called “Gevurah--My Life, Our World & the Adventure of Turning 80.”

Gateway Rehab is a not-for-profit organization that provides treatment in locations throughout western Pennsylvania and Ohio for adults and youth who are struggling with the disease of addiction to alcohol and other drugs. For more information, call 800-472-1177 or visit www.gatewayrehab.org.

BEING THERE FOR YOUR KIDS IN RECOVERY

By Claudia Black, Ph.D

Continued from page 10

Take this slowly and keep it simple. If it is something that occurs weekly or daily, identify one new behavior and then focus on being consistent with it. Don’t try several at one time. Again, go slow. If too many changes are made at one time, it can seem as if you have just landed from outer space. Don’t forget your being clean and sober is the greatest beginning of any and all healthy family traditions and rituals.

Non-Verbal Parenting Even if you don’t have the children in your home, or they are of adult age and out on their own, know that you are modeling 1) people can change, because you are changing; and 2) it is okay to ask for help, because you have done that and it is helpful.

My daughter was grown by the time I got sober. More than anything I loved her and wanted her to know that. I wanted her to know that the parent she saw all of her growing up years wasn’t the real me—that there was this whole other me, this place of love that I had for her that I had lost control of due to my drinking and drugging lifestyle. The hardest part was being honest. Then I had to be willing to listen and not argue with her about how she saw me. I know what she saw. She saw the addict. She couldn’t see my place of love; it was too well hidden.

So I listened and I didn’t need to argue, I was now in my place of love.

She had her experiences because of how I acted in my disease.

I talked; she listened. She talked; I listened. Together we have healed.

Claudia Black Ph.D., Senior Fellow & Addiction & Trauma Program Specialist at The Meadows Author of Straight Talk: What Recovering Parents Should Tell Their Kids about Drugs and Alcohol

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The contents of this book may not be reproduced either in whole or in part without consent of publisher. Every effort has been made to include accurate data, however the publisher cannot be held liable for material content or errors. This publication offers Therapeutic Services, Drug & Alcohol Rehabilitative services, and other related support systems. You should not rely on the information as a substitute for, nor does it replace professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have any concerns or questions about your health, you should always consult with a physician or other health-care professional. Do not disregard, avoid or delay obtaining medical or health related advice from your health care professional because of something you may have read in this publication. The Sober World LLC and its publisher do not recommend nor endorse any advertisers in this magazine and accepts no responsibility for services advertised herein. Content published herein is submitted by advertisers with the sole purpose to aid and educate families that are faced with drug/alcohol and other addiction issues and to help families make informed decisions about preserving quality of life.

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