Oct13 issue

A Better way to recover From alcoholism and drug addiction Detaching with Compassion from a Loved One’s Alcohol Problem FOR PEOPLE WHO CAN’T STAND SELF INDULGENCE IN OTHERS, BUT OFTEN FORGIVE IT IN THEMSELVES Family, Personality, Brain Chemistry and Addiction If I Had Only Known Then What I Know Now Would It Have Turned Out Differently?

Prescription Drug Addiction – Are Doctors Responsible?

Drug Treatment and Crime After the war on drugs...

Emotional Core Therapy The Power of Families to Assist in Recovery LET’S EXPLORE THE LEARNED COMPONENT OF MOTIVATION My Friend/Family Member Just Went Through Rehab How Do I Fit Into Aftercare?

Redemption and Happiness Are Found in Recovery

Holistic Medicine And Why It Should Be Your First Option

Wayside House’s Success Rate High, says Its Medical Director

Conquering the Stress-Anxiety-Addiction (s-a-a-)_ Spiral

Breaking the cycle of addiction in families

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A LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER Dear Readers, I welcome you to The Sober World magazine. This magazine is being directly mailed each month to anyone that has been arrested due to drugs, alcohol and petty theft in Palm Beach County. It is also distributed locally to all Palm Beach County High School Guidance Counselors, Middle School Coordinators, Palm Beach County Drug Court, Broward County School Substance Abuse Expulsion Program, Broward County Court Unified Family Division, Local Colleges and other various locations. We also directly mail to many rehabs throughout the state and country.

convince your loved one that they need help. There are detox centers that provide medical supervision to help them through the withdrawal process, There are Transport Services that will scoop up your resistant loved one (under 18 yrs. old) and bring them to the facility you have chosen. There are long term Residential Programs (sometimes a year and longer) as well as short term programs (30-90 days), there are Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Wilderness programs, Extended Living and there are Sober Living Housing where they can work, go to meetings and be accountable for staying clean.

We are expanding our mission to assist families worldwide in their search for information about Drug and Alcohol Abuse.

Many times a Criminal Attorney will try to work out a deal with the court to allow your child or loved one to seek treatment as an alternative to jail. I know how overwhelming this period can be for you and I urge every parent or relative of an addict to get some help for yourself. There are many groups that can help you. There is Al-Anon, Alateen (for teenagers), Families Anonymous, Nar-Anon and more. This is a disease that affects the whole family, not just the parents.

Our monthly magazine is available for free on our website at www.thesoberworld.com.

If you would like to receive an E-version monthly of the magazine, please send your e-mail address to patricia@thesoberworld.com Drug addiction has reached epidemic proportions throughout the country and is steadily increasing. It is being described as “the biggest man-made epidemic” in the United States. More people are dying from drug overdoses than from any other cause of injury death, including traffic accidents, falls or guns.

Many Petty thefts are drug related, as the addicts need for drugs causes them to take desperate measures in order to have the ability to buy their drugs. The availability of prescription narcotics is overwhelming; as parents our hands are tied.

Doctors continue writing prescriptions for drugs such as Oxycontin, and Oxycodone (which is an opiate drug and just as addictive as heroin) to young adults in their 20’s and 30’s right up to the elderly in their 70”s, thus, creating a generation of addicts.

Did you know that Purdue Pharma, the company that manufactures Oxycontin generated $3.1 BILLION in revenue in 2010? Scary isn’t it?

Addiction is a disease but there is a terrible stigma attached to it. As family members affected by this disease, we are often too ashamed to speak to anyone about our loved ones addiction, feeling that we will be judged. We try to pass it off as a passing phase in their lives, and some people hide their head in the sand until it becomes very apparent such as through an arrest, getting thrown out of school or even worse an overdose, that we realize the true extent of their addiction.

I know that many of you who are reading this now are frantic that their loved one has been arrested. No parent ever wants to see his or her child arrested or put in jail, but this may be your opportunity to save your child or loved one’s life.

They are more apt to listen to you now than they were before, when whatever you said may have fallen on deaf ears. This is the point where you know your loved one needs help, but you don’t know where to begin.

These groups allow you to share your thoughts and feelings. As anonymous groups, your anonymity is protected. Anything said within those walls are not shared with anyone outside the room. You share only your first name, not your last name. This is a wonderful way for you to be able to openly convey what has been happening in your life as well as hearing other people share their stories. You will find that the faces are different but the stories are all too similar. You will also be quite surprised to see how many families are affected by drug and alcohol addiction.

Addiction knows no race or religion; it affects the wealthy as well as the poor, the highly educated, old, young-IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE. This magazine is dedicated to my son Steven who graduated with top honors from University of Central Florida. He graduated with a degree in Psychology, and was going for his Masters in Applied Behavioral Therapy.

He was a highly intelligent, sensitive young man who helped many people get their lives on the right course. He could have accomplished whatever he set his mind out to do. Unfortunately, after graduating from college he tried a drug that was offered to him not realizing how addictive it was and the power it would have over him.

My son was 7 months clean when he relapsed and died of a drug overdose.

I hope this magazine helps you find the right treatment for your loved one.

They have a disease and like all diseases, you try to find the best care suited for their needs. They need help.

Deaths from prescription drug overdose have been called the “silent epidemic” for years. There is approximately one American dying every 17 minutes from an accidental prescription drug overdose. Please don’t allow your loved one to become a statistic. I hope you have found this magazine helpful. You may also visit us on the web at www.thesoberworld.com.

I have compiled this informative magazine to try to take that fear and anxiety away from you and let you know there are many options to choose from.

We are also on Face Book at The Sober World and Sober-World Steven.

There are Psychologists and Psychiatrists that specialize in treating people with addictions. There are Education Consultants that will work with you to figure out what your loved ones needs are and come up with the best plan for them. There are Interventionists who will hold an intervention and try to

Sincerely,

To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

Patricia Publisher

Patricia@TheSoberWorld.com

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IMPORTANT HELPLINE NUMBERS 211 PALM BEACH/TREASURE COAST 211 www.211palmbeach.org FOR THE TREASURE COAST www.211treasurecoast.org FOR TEENAGERS www.teen211pbtc.org AAHOTLINE-NORTH PALM BEACH 561-655-5700 HOPE. BELIEVE. RECOVER. www.aa-palmbeachcounty.org AA HOTLINE- SOUTH COUNTY 561-276-4581 www.aainpalmbeach.org FLORIDA ABUSE HOTLINE 1-800-962-2873 www.dcf.state.fl.us/programs/abuse/ AL-ANON- PALM BEACH COUNTY 561-278-3481 www.southfloridaalanon.org AL-ANON- NORTH PALM BEACH 561-882-0308 www.palmbeachafg.org FAMILIES ANONYMOUS 847-294-5877

(USA) 800-736-9805

(Local) 561-236-8183 Center for Group Counseling 561-483-5300 www.groupcounseling.org CO-DEPENDENTS ANONYMOUS 561-364-5205 www.pbcoda.com A STRUCTURED, WOMEN--ONLY COCAINE ANONYMOUS 954-779-7272 www.fla-ca.org TRANSITIONAL HOUSING PROGRAM COUNCIL ON COMPULSIVE GAMBLING 800-426-7711 www.gamblinghelp.org IN DELRAY BEACH, FLORIDA CRIMESTOPPERS 800-458-TIPS (8477) www.crimestopperspbc.com CRIME LINE 800-423-TIPS (8477) Millie Tennessee, www.crimeline.org Executive Director DEPRESSION AND MANIC DEPRESSION 954-746-2055 561-302-9584 www.mhabroward FLORIDA DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE 800-500-1119 www.fcadv.org FLORIDA HIV/AIDS HOTLINE 800-FLA-AIDS (352-2437) FLORIDA INJURY HELPLINE 800-510-5553 GAMBLERS ANONYMOUS 800-891-1740 www.miracles-do-happen.net www.ga-sfl.org and www.ga-sfl.com HEPATITUS B HOTLINE 800-891-0707 JEWISH FAMILY AND CHILD SERVICES 561-684-1991 www.jfcsonline.com LAWYER ASSISTANCE 800-282-8981 MARIJUANA ANONYMOUS 800-766-6779 www.marijuana-anonymous.org NARC ANON FLORIDA REGION 888-947-8885 www.naranonfl.org NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS-PALM BEACH 561-848-6262 www.palmcoastna.org NATIONAL RUNAWAY SWITCHBOARD 800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) www.1800runaway.org NATIONAL SUICIDE HOTLINE 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433) www.suicidology.org ONLINE MEETING FOR MARIJUANA www.ma-online.org Overeaters Anonymous- Broward County www.goldcoast.oagroups.org Overeaters Anonymous- Palm Beach County www.oapalmbeachfl.org Ruth Rales Jewish Family Services 561-852-3333 www.ruthralesjfs.org WOMEN IN DISTRESS 954-761-1133 PALM BEACH COUNTY MEETING HALLS

Miracles DO Happen

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SW Corner of Atlantic & Congress Club Oasis 561-694-1949 Crossroads 561-278-8004 www.thecrossroadsclub.com EasY Does It 561-433-9971 Lambda North Clubhouse www.lambdanorth.org The Meeting Place 561-255-9866 www.themeetingplaceinc.com The Triangle Club 561-832-1110 www.Thetriangleclubwpb.com BROWARD COUNTY MEETING HALLS 12 STEP HOUSE 954-523-4984

205 SW 23RD STREET 101 CLUB 700 SW 10TH DRIVE & DIXIE HWY LAMBDA SOUTH CLUB 954-761-9072 WWW.LAMBDASOUTH.COM POMPANO BEACH GROUP SW CORNER OF SE 2ND & FEDERAL HWY PRIDE CENTER 954-463-9005 www.pridecenterflorida.org WEST BROWARD CLUB 954-476-8290 WWW.WESTBROWARDCLUB.ORG

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We all marvel at the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely do we consider what it went through to become that butterfly. – Maya Angelou

A Private, Upscale Recovery Residence for Women in Beautiful Wellington, Florida

Kim Koslow, LMHC, CAP – Founder 954-540-8441 | www.butterflyhousepalmbeach.com

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Florida Association of Recovery Residences

Certified Member

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A Better Way to Recover from Alcoholism and Drug Addiction

By Harold C. Urschel III, M.D., M.M.A.

Introduction

What Is Dual Diagnosis?

Each year, medical problems caused by addiction, along with lost earnings, accidents and crime, cost Americans more than $500 billion. State and federal governments spend more than $15 billion per year, and insurers another $5 billion more annually on substance abuse treatment services for about four million people. Researchers estimate that some 20 million Americans who could benefit from treatment are not getting it. Additionally, for those patients who are receiving treatment, the majority of the industry still treats alcohol and drug addiction with only behavioral and psychosocial approaches.

For many individuals, addiction treatment is only half the battle. It is estimated that 50 percent of alcohol abusers and 53 percent of drug abusers also have at least one co-occurring mental illness. These patients have what is called a dual diagnosis, a term used to describe co-existing conditions of a person suffering from a psychiatric illness and a substance addiction problem. A wide variety of psychiatric illnesses can accompany addiction. The most common co-occurring psychiatric illnesses are bipolar disorder, anxiety disorders, depressive disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and schizophrenia.

Fortunately, we now have scientific evidence that concludes addiction is a chronic, progressive disease of the brain with many similarities to other chronic medical diseases such as diabetes, hypertension and asthma and needs to be treated with a combination of behavioral therapy and a medicalbased approach. The American Medical Association (AMA), National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), National Institutes of Health (NIH), World Health Organization (WHO), American Psychiatric Association (APA), as well as many other organizations in the scientific and medical fields, now recognize alcohol/drug addiction as a chronic and progressive physical disease that attacks the brain, damaging key parts of the limbic system and cerebral cortex causing lasting changes in the brain. These changes don’t go away, sometimes for months or years, even after recovering patients stop using. Although an individual’s initial choice to drink alcohol or use a substance is a voluntary one, over time the substance physically changes the brain to where the individual truly cannot stop his or her addictive behavior, even though the desire to do so might be high.

As with other chronic conditions such as cardiovascular disease, the standard of care involves front-line physiological interventions through surgery or medication, followed by environmental and behavior modifications.

Hypertension and high cholesterol are often controlled by medication, but modifying dietary habits and exercise are necessary steps as well. Addiction treatment is no different and with the proper treatment approach, it too can be managed and give individuals hope that they can be healed and live a clean or sober life.

These scans clearly demonstrate that alcohol severely injures the brain.

Scientists believe that it is this damage that causes the brain disease of addiction. This realization has led us to be smarter about how to treat addiction, and in recent years has resulted in the development of several FDA-approved, anti-addiction medications that when combined with the appropriate behavioral approaches can dramatically improve the treatment outcomes of substance-dependent patients.

Anti-addiction medications can be used to counter the brain injury caused by past alcohol or drug use and relieve withdrawal symptoms, or to help overcome alcohol or drug induced cravings. These medications intervene on the neurological pathways in the brain that cause the cravings and the euphoric “high” an individual experiences when they use. Once this process is interrupted, and the substances are removed from the body, the brain can start to “rewire” those damaged pathways and heal itself (the healing process usually takes between 4 – 12 months of complete sobriety). Medications are a remarkable tool in treating addiction, but they are not a magic bullet. For some, these treatments can “jump start” their recovery and provide relief from cravings - allowing them to better concentrate on the behavioral and psychosocial aspects of their recovery.

Dual diagnosis is not simply one disease added to another. It is one disease multiplied by another. The two illnesses can interact, each making the other worse, complicating treatment and increasing the risk of relapse.

At times, the symptoms of one may overlap and even mask the symptoms of the other, making diagnosis and treatment much more difficult. The presence of co-occurring illnesses also can slow the recovery process, weakening an individual’s resolve to stay sober.

Even if the co-occurring illnesses are correctly identified, it is extremely difficult to get an individual suffering from addiction plus emotional distress to actively engage in and cooperate with the treatment process. The addiction and the psychiatric illness must be managed simultaneously to insure that one illness does not cause a relapse of the other. The combined treatment plan must be comprehensive, coordinated, integrated and flexible. It must include treatment for the psychiatric illness, treatment for the alcohol or drug addiction, participation in a 12-step based program, appropriate non-addicting medication for each illness, stress management programs as well as family education and participation in treatment for both component illnesses.

The Role of Family Therapy Addiction is never just one person’s problem; it affects the entire family system. This is because substance abuse and addiction are no longer considered an individual issue, but instead are viewed as a broader disease that impacts the entire family, affecting the family’s health, happiness and well-being. In fact, it has been found that addiction treatment approaches that include and focus on the family significantly increase a patient’s engagement and retention in the treatment process, resulting in improved outcomes for the entire family.

When a loved one is in the throes of addiction, family members can feel abandoned, anxious, fearful, angry, embarrassed, guilty and a host of other emotions. The damage extends throughout the family as they struggle to cover up the problem, work around the issue, deal with their own negative emotions and cope with the responsibilities the addicted family member has left unattended and unfilled. Many times the family members can unwittingly become enablers by allowing the loved one to continue their damaging behavior and keeping the addiction in play. For this reason, it is important that family members be involved in the treatment process from the beginning, participating in family therapy sessions for the benefit of both the addicted person and all members of the family.

When a person’s family is involved in the recovery process, the family members gain a better understanding of the disease of addiction and the Continued on page 30

In figure 1, you can clearly see the overall decreased activity in the brain of a 38-year-old male with 17 years of heavy weekend alcohol use when compared to a normal brain. (SPECT images courtesy of D.G. Amen, MD)

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FOR PEOPLE WHO CAN’T STAND SELF INDULGENCE IN OTHERS, BUT OFTEN FORGIVE IT IN THEMSELVES

By Charles Rubin

Years ago, when I was a creative director in the ad biz, I wrote a headline for a luxury item which read: “For People Who Can’t Stand Self-Indulgence in Others, But Who Often Forgive in Themselves.”

red toilet paper in their dressing room bathrooms? Or movie stars who have decreed that anyone making eye contact with them on a film set will be looking instead at the long line at the unemployment office.

I had in mind some of the people I knew who so imperiously wore a mantle of royalty and privilege and who would never deign to as much as ride on a city bus or step inside a J.C Penney’s Department Store. Stay at a Motel 6? “Ewww” they would sniff.

In ancient civilizations, anyone gazing upon a king or emperor might be blinded. Or beheaded. Or both.

My youngest son is a good example of this kind of personality. Treating him to lunch not too long ago, he seemed oblivious of the B.L.T special that I was having for $5.99, and went straight for the trout almandine costing five times that.

He is of that class of people for whom the word entitlement definitely resonates. As do all my children. In fact, “entitlement” is a family tradition.

When out of control, it’s one of the quirkiest of human behaviors, and one of the most difficult to understand or deal with. And I don’t for a moment believe that I wasn’t tainted by the very same brush. Along with most of the people I know.

It’s only natural for people, Americans especially, to expect the best of everything. And why not? This is a country that offers the best of everything.

So shouldn’t our children expect the best? They’ve been following our example since birth. Some are called fussy, others are called selective.

Lesser appellations include “selfish” and “self –centered” and “narcissistic.”

All are accurate.

Like all good connoisseurs in training, they’ve been tutored to differentiate between the mundane and the grand. They’ve been dressed in the best apparel we could afford, fed excellent food because they had growing bodies, been sent to good schools, sometimes leaving us in near poverty.

Giving one’s child a sophomore year in Europe has meant a second or third mortgage and a steady diet of canned beans. Sacrifice for parents is huge in this arena.

To deny “your little princess” or “your special boy” (a very bad idea that causes untold grief), a parent may be left feeling wretched with guilt. The diatribe in one’s head will be arguing: How can I do this to my own flesh and blood?

If we, when young, had acted like many of the kids today, we would have been called “spoiled brats.” We might also have endured the humiliation of being taken over one’s knee. Today, therapists caution you to desist in such tactics, besides which, today’s children aren’t dumb. They know how to pick up the phone and call a lawyer.

I personally don’t believe in corporal punishment. Instead of spanking my kids, I gave them lines to write. I will not do this, I will not do that. This kept them in the house instead of being out with their friends.

Then, one day, they came to me with a proposition. “Instead of giving us lines,” they asked, “can you just beat us?”

Try as we might to steer our kids on the right path, we are up against something so huge, so overpowering, so out of our control, that we must eventually bow to it: The Media.

This vast machine is an omnipresent worldwide network that dominates the minds of youngsters, making them into material goods junkies and parents into material goods hostages.

Each and every day, the media claims young victims, those avid followers whose only focus is on what is trending right now. Hard to believe but everybody follows this course in some way or other. Even you. Haven’t you been thinking about getting a new car? And what about that vacation to Grand Canyon next summer?

Didn’t you tell yourself you deserve these things? That you worked hard for them?

The difference is that you did earn the money to make the purchases that make life more enjoyable. The erring entitled entity has no concept of earning a paycheck and will freeload as long as possible, never contributing a thing, not a smile or a thank you in return.

Entitlement and self-indulgence are everywhere in the public eye. You don’t think Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip feel entitled? And what about rock star divas who have it written into their contracts that they must have

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Entitlement in a child starts with the seemingly innocent remarks we make in their developing years: “Oh, you don’t want to pick your clothes off the floor?” Let me do it for you.” And “You want that new i-phone? But, of course, my little darling angel sweetheart. Nobody deserves an i-phone more than you, ” And: “You’ll have a screaming fit and swallow your tongue if I don’t give you a convertible for graduation? What color would you like?”

While you may not fall for such ploys, beware of grandparents. They make powerful allies for the entitled child although a true “career” entitled child needs no allies to get what he or she wants.

My youngest son, at the age of nine, merely mimicked me by writing checks and forging my signature to get what he wanted. And what he wanted was drugs.

How he pulled off these capers was something that even a seasoned crook might not have thought of. He wrote notes. He wrote lots of notes.

He would fabricate scenarios in which I was too busy or too sick or that I was called out of town, and would the nice teller give the note-bearer $200? 300? 500?

The amazing thing was that the nice bank teller didn’t think twice about handing over these sums.

You might think I would have been on the lookout for future thefts, but no. I was in a state of denial. My little son, even when he became my big, hulking son, couldn’t really have done this deed. It didn’t matter that I didn’t notice the abrupt cessation of bank statements. What became clear after a few years was that he had effectively wiped out his and his brother’s entire college fund.

Well, it could have been worse. He could have robbed the bank itself.

A homeboy at heart, he honored us by very thoughtfully keeping all his misdemeanors in the family. On a trip to see relatives in Scotland one summer, he stole his grandfather’s prized stamp collection worth $9,000 and hocked it for $9.00.

Would his visibly upset grandfather like to call the police and prefer charges? I had asked. “Nooooo, I canny do,” his Edinburgh grandfather said. Back home, realizing that my son would stop at nothing to get the money to buy drugs, I finally had to do something about it. I preferred charges. My son was then fourteen and truly hooked on hard drugs.

A judge ordered him to be sent to a rehab for eighteen months. Just days after being released, he was back on drugs. C’est la vie.

If you think that this kind of situation was unique in my family, you have only to stop the nearest person on the street.

Ask the following question: Is there a young person in your family who is using drugs, staying out until all hours, stealing anything not nailed down, destroying the premises, and making his or her parents crazy?

Seems like there’s someone with this description in all families.

Chances are the person you have chosen will tell you how the specter of entitlement, sparked by substances, has spiraled out of control creating bloody murder in home, the end result being the cessation of one’s home life as one once knew it.

Disassociation, sometimes for life, with a person’s most beloved family members often becomes a reality. The seriousness of the problem, and the inability to change what is happening, leaves claw marks on the lives of countless thousands each year..

For the entitled child, manipulator supreme, you will never be able to change the scenario. As Quentin Crisp, the author, once commented: “You can give and give and give and then when you are in your grave, you will think you didn’t give enough.”

Heartbreaking as it is, it’s the way it is. The sooner this fact penetrates and is accepted, the sooner a person can take back his or her life. However, It won’t be an overnight accomplishment.

Continued on page 30

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Family, Personality, Brain Chemistry and Addiction

By Dr. Michael J De Vito

There is no one Addictive or Compulsive Behavior. There are many. Sex, gambling, internet pornography, cutting, eating disorders, these would be the more common examples of just a few. Additionally, there is not just one drug of choice. There are many. For example, alcohol, opiates, meth, cocaine and marijuana, are some that are readily available and waiting. Yet rarely if ever, does any one person find themselves compulsively engaging in all of them. The compulsive and addicted individual gravitates to a drug or activity of choice. They participate in that special primary relationship that defines the nature of their addiction. How did that happen? Did we just pick door number three and suddenly become a meth or opiate addict? Or perhaps we spun the wheel and it clattered and clicked then slowly settled on alcohol abuse and addiction. Did that door or wheel ultimately lead us to multiple DUI’s, career mishaps, incarceration and family destruction?

Are we just passive participants waiting for the next spin of the wheel to determine if there is a reward or a bankrupt? Should we have opened a different door? Make no mistake about it. We chose our addictive compulsive behavior ourselves. We chose which drug or activity to become our new best friend. Not by the chance spin of a wheel or opening a mystery door but by our own choice, and we chose it for a reason. How does that happen? Why would we choose such a life? Let’s explore a little.

Summer is coming to an end. It is a breezy beautiful day, late afternoon in southern Nevada. I am driving by one of our city parks, a welcome oasis in the middle of the desert.

Children are playing tag on the grass, throwing Frisbees, swinging on swings by the dog park and just enjoying the remaining few days of summer vacation. Most of them are pre-teens, laughing, smiling and enjoying the day. Now here is the amazing and alarming truth. Within the next few years over half of these children will have experimented, used, habitually abused and in some cases become addicted to some form of chemical or compulsive activity, and they haven’t even gotten to high school yet. That is a fact. This is how it begins.

We are who we are. We have parents and they had parents too. We have a family and genetic connections. Family history is a factor to be considered and understood in addictive behavior. Now understand this. No family is the cause of addiction. Remember the door and the wheel. We are not passive participants. We have choices. Genetics and family history do determine many things. Some people will get a beautiful tan when out for a day or two at the beach. Others like me will get sunburn in a much shorter time. That is genetics and family related. I have a choice to burn or monitor my time, wear proper clothes and use sun block. If I burn do I blame my great grandfather or my mother? I had a choice. Here is my point. If your father and mother are alcoholics perhaps you cannot be a social drinker.

And your alcohol history will tell you something about you. If you have family members who have engaged in compulsive behaviors you also may be at risk. But you have choices. It’s not fair and it may not be easy but a choice is going to be made one way or another. You have a choice.

I do understand that someone already in active compulsive behavior and addiction has temporarily lost the cognitive ability to choose but we will talk about that in a short time.

We are who we are. We have a Psychological Nature. We have a particular personality, a personality unique to us. Are we shy or out-going? Do we make friends easily? Does it take us time to fit in? Are we comfortable around others? Is your sales call or interview stressful? These factors determine our emotional state.

If we are not content with ourselves and who we are, what drug or activity could we use to change that state of emotion? Would alcohol allow us to relax and fit in more? Would stealing something or gambling give us the thrill we have been craving? Would marijuana make the boredom of school or work easier? Did that experimentation with meth give us a lift to see the world in a more exciting way? Does cutting my arm, just a little, make me feel more alive? Will that work again? Forever?

We are who we are. Within our brain we have billions of brain cells called neurons. Each one of these neurons has hundreds of thousands of receptors. These receptors receive information. How do we know the difference between our house key and our car key? Are those people friends or strangers? Are they going to hurt me? Do I feel safe? For us to be able to interact with the world, have a sense of well-being, have the ability to learn, sleep and eat, each one of these neurons and receptors must communicate with another neuron. But neurons don’t touch each

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other. They communicate by sending chemicals back and forth into the many receptor sites. Our entire body and mind is receptor driven.

Brain Chemistry, the neurotransmitters,such as Serotonin, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Endorphins and many others. All these neurotransmitters play a major role in how we function, how we feel and who we are at any given point of time. When we or those children in the park first experimented with an outside drug or thrilling activity, brain chemistry began to change. Receptor sites became blocked, temporarily stimulated or sedated. If we did not like the feeling we did not return. We would not use that drug or engage in that activity again. But what if we felt better?

What if we liked it? Could we talk to people and fit in? Were we less shy?

Were we less hyper and intense? Did we feel better about ourselves? Did our emotional state seem to become more functional for the situation? Was school more tolerable? Was it easier to go home? Was the sales call or interview less stressful? Maybe that same drug or activity will work again, and another time too. We have just found our drug or activity of choice and it is different for everyone. Brain chemistry continues to change. What once was working one way now begins to work another way. More and more of the drug or activity are now being compulsively craved to try and maintain some level of perceived normal function. Less and less of the normal brain chemistry is being produced causing craving, anxiety, insomnia and a lack of well-being. What seemed to work in the beginning and make us feel better now never seems to be enough to get us where we want to be. In fact now we feel worse than we ever did. We are chasing an illusion. Our best friend is letting us down. And to make matters worse everyone around us can see it happening and we keep chasing the dragon.

Instead of the brain functioning cognitively and logically we now have the mid brain in control, the midbrain, the reactive brain, that is the involuntary part of the brain. We now do things that are irrational and illogical. We do what we don’t want to do, and we do it over and over again. We have lost our ability to choose. We now have a compulsion and an addiction. It may have all begun by experimenting with friends after a day of playing in the park, having fun at a party, perhaps after a high school football game, or getting to know new peers in a college dorm, but it had a beginning. We have gone from abstinence to addiction within a progressive process that seems mere a moment.

Now let me end with some wonderful and positive news. News that I hope you would also share. There are millions of people around the world who now lead positive productive lives. People who have had their health, families and careers restored. They are in recovery, free from compulsive and addictive behavior. Recovery is available to anyone no matter how long or how severe that addiction is or has been. I know. I have been helping people successfully achieve and live a life of recovery for over 3o years.

Recovery is real. It begins with recognition and the decision to change.

The first step is by breaking that mid brain compulsive cycle. That requires treatment, and I don’t mean switching one drug for another. That is not treatment . That is insanity.

The power of choice returns once the cognitive mind is back in control.

This is the point where counseling will have its most beneficial effect. We get to choose how we conduct and live our lives. We get to live a life of recovery.

If you need help, get help. If you know someone who needs help, don’t enable them, help them. You will be a part of a better life for someone not yet born.

Dr. Michael J. De Vito is a diplomate and is board certified in Addictionology.

He is the founder and program director of NewStart Treatment Center located in Henderson, Nevada. He is presently in private practice helping patients from all parts of the world attain and successfully live a life of recovery from substance abuse and addictive behavior. NewStart Treatment Center utilizes a drug free and natural approach to addiction treatment. www.4anewstart.com Dr. De Vito is a graduate of Mansfield University of Pennsylvania and Northwestern Health Science University in Minneapolis, Minnesota. He has been an instructor of Medial Ethics, Clinical Pathology, Anatomy and Physiology at the College of Southern Nevada.

Dr. De Vito is the author of Addiction: The Master Keys to Recovery www.AddictionRecoveryKeys.com

To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

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Detaching with Compassion from a Loved One’s Alcohol Problem

By Anne Morshead

Issues associated with alcohol in our society today are well documented and so, why do those living with a loved one’s drinking problem often keep quiet about it and don’t seek help?

There still seems to be a stigma attached to having an alcoholic in the family and much shame is felt. Drinking alcohol is such a major part of our social culture: it’s legal, fun and makes us feel good. If someone points the finger they can be seen as a killjoy forcing others to look at their own consumption. Even now, we conveniently forget it’s a drug. Many of the family’s woes can be projected onto the problem drinker making the person a scapegoat so the rest of the family can pretend they are okay.

Outside opinion often tacitly blames the family too. Consequently, it is easier to keep it a private problem, attempt to hide it and try to manage it within the unit, continuing the denial and containing the shame but at such a cost to all the individuals concerned. I know; I lived with my partner’s active alcoholic drinking for five years. During that time I turned into someone I didn’t recognise anymore.

I met my partner in the local pub, soon after moving over to Ireland from England, thirteen years ago. Not knowing he had a problem, at first I just thought he drank more than I did but then, gradually, I found I was drinking more and more often than I really wanted to. I put it down to the continued holiday feeling, of being in a foreign culture. But after a while it became obvious and my friends probably wondered why I didn’t leave him. I wasn’t financially dependent on him and there were no children and so, why did it take me a whole five years to recover my life?

Firstly, I made two classic and quite arrogant mistakes. I thought I knew all about the effects of alcohol as my father had worked in the ‘booze trade’ and I grew up with my parents’ social drinking. My partner had a fairly miserable Irish childhood; his father was a raging alcoholic and he is visually impaired: a degenerative condition, incurable at present. As a couplescounsellor, I reckoned, if he understood at a deeper level why he chose to drown his sorrows as a way of coping with his life, he could choose to change his behaviour. It was also a very stressful time as his mother was in the protracted process of dying and naturally he was upset. This together with his lack of eyesight meant I made excuses to myself and others when he got drunk on a regular basis. Ethyl alcohol is a very subtle drug. Every family is hoodwinked in its own way and makes excuses for the drinker’s behaviour whilst categorically believing them to be true.

He was often contrite, promising to cut down and so I encouraged him, reasoned with him and was nurturing only to criticise, reproach and nag him with the next breath, feeling very angry and resentful when yet again he was staggering about, wetting the bed and obviously completely sozzled. As everyday life felt ever more chaotic, I started to try to control his drinking even thinking I could cure it if I racked my brains enough and expended enough energy to come up with a solution. I managed all the difficulties that cropped up, monitored where he was, what he was doing and the more incapable he became, the more capable I was. I took on responsibility for what belonged to him in the mistaken idea that I was doing the right thing. He was obsessed with alcohol and I was obsessed with him to the detriment of my own interests, my own well-being and my own health. Confusingly, it wasn’t all bad; there were happy times, he could be charming and attentive, allowing me to hope that all would be well but, really, keeping us both locked into dependency.

After we confronted his problem, he made several attempts to dry out in the local psychiatric hospital, and attend residential rehabilitation courses always appearing to recover but returned to drinking immediately.

I still thought if he truly cared about me and really wanted to stop, he could.

I didn’t understand the word compulsion. The dictionary describes it as ‘an irresistible urge to a form of behaviour, especially, against one’s conscious wishes’. Perhaps unless you experience it you can never really understand?

As he was now unable to drink in front of me, the deceit and lying escalated and his condition got worse: the quantity increased, with spirits being a stronger and quicker way to do the trick and bottles were hidden everywhere. I thought I was going mad and just the same as him, I upped my defensive behaviour. Miserable and despairing, frustrated and depressed, too often I said I couldn’t go on living like this and that we had to part but reneged every time, fearing being alone and feeling guilty in rejecting him. Eventually, when the constant adrenalin overload created enough health issues (panic attacks, irrational fears, exhaustion), I

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became focussed enough to start to unglue myself from him and begin the tentative detachment.

I started by gathering information about the physical and emotional effects of the drug, risked taking small steps in not doing for him what he could do himself and concentrated on staying in the present to avoid anxious fantasies about the future whether it was in half an hour’s time or ten days. It was very, very difficult as it meant fundamentally changing my natural habits.

Finally, I told him I cared about him but didn’t want to see or talk to him until he had decided to stop drinking. Knowing he might never be able to stop and therefore was likely to die from blind actions if not organ failure, why did I mean it that time? The only explanation I have is, although I knew intellectually that I cannot stop anyone from drinking if that is what they wish to do, I had not inhabited that thought. It was a whole body understanding that it was the right and only possible decision if I wanted to recover my own well-being. It is no coincidence that when I eventually managed to cease trying to stop him from drinking, he stopped.

With loved ones, detaching goes against the grain giving the impression one doesn’t care about the other. Feelings of guilt can mean we sabotage our best efforts reverting to normal behaviour too soon. The drinker certainly won’t like any change in the status quo and it’s all too easy to detach with indifference, rejecting the person. Remember that no one came out of the womb thinking ‘I know what I’ll be when I grow up, I’ll be an alcoholic’. The loved one is ill not a bad person. Often those who become romantically involved with a problem drinker are people-pleasers or rescuers and become co-dependent. Innate caretakers find it very difficult to detach from other people’s business in general. Caring for someone infantilises them, caring about them doesn’t. Detaching with compassion allows someone to act in an adult way. I have found that when I change my attitudes I am better able to change my behaviour and when I act in a different way, I often change my feelings toward the other person. Sadly, some alcoholic drinkers do not recover but many, many do.

They need space to experience the consequences of their actions. We need to feel the fear of what may happen if we don’t ‘pick up the pieces’.

Bringing the focus back to oneself and changing oneself instead of trying to get the other person to change can bring up strong feelings of resentment. Resentment is really only self-pity because our expectations haven’t been met. Along with facing the reality of the situation, we may have to face the fact that our expectations are not realistic and be willing for our hopes and dreams to be met by ourselves. We can look to other ways in which we can feel fulfilled with friends, interests and activities.

It’s of paramount importance to ask for help; to talk to someone who is experiencing the same problem (friends mean well but probably don’t understand) and then we won’t feel so alone and isolated. By externalising our feelings, we take the first step away from denial and shame towards health, recovery and hope for the future.

My partner acknowledges he probably always knew that he had a problem; he drank alcoholically long before I met him. I displayed ingrained traits belonging to me and my upbringing which enabled him to carry on drinking and get progressively worse. I am not alone in this behaviour, most family members do the same in the mistaken hope that they are helping when they are hindering the possible recovery of the addict. The longer I prevented him from being responsible for his thoughts, feelings and actions, the more I added to my own distress and ill-health. The more I tried to control him because of my fear of loss of control, loss of safety and security, the more I added to it. The longer I tried to rescue him thinking that if I was needed I would be loved, the less I felt loved.

It is said that alcohol addiction is 10% physical and 90% psychological.

Now that he is sober, my partner is examining the reasons behind his decision to deal with his emotional issues through alcohol. He is doing much better than I, since he hasn’t had a drink for eight years whilst I, daily, have to remember to mind my own business, not to interfere in his or anyone else’s life, not to give advice unless it is requested and to let others be.

Anne Morshead is originally from Marlow, Buckinghamshire in England and currently living in Ireland. She is a Couples Counsellor and the Author of Blind Drunk – Light at the end of the tunnel for anyone living with a loved one’s alcohol problem.

We’ve been saving lives for the past 28 years WE HAVE ALL LEVELS OF CARE! • Detoxication Program • Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) • Intensive Outpatient (IOP) • Outpatient Program (OP) • 24 hour staff in all programs

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If I Had Only Known Then What I Know Now Would It Have Turned Out Differently?

By Leslie Ferris

Ah yes, the old ‘would of, could of, should of’ question. It can plague us parents of addicted kids until we can’t stand it anymore. It’s like that fly, mosquito, or gnat that just won’t stop bugging us no matter how many times we try to swat it away. What a nagging pest.

As parents of addicted kids, we constantly search for answers about why and how we got to this point, and what we might have done differently so that it all wouldn’t have happened the way it did. It’s downright agonizing really, because at the root of all of those questions is parental guilt. We ask ourselves, ‘Is it my fault? Is there something I did or didn’t do that caused this?’

So, if we had known then what we know now, could we have prevented our child’s addiction? That’s hard to say. Maybe, maybe not, and we will never truly know the answer to that question. We might have sent them to grandma’s house for that fateful summer, not allowed them to hang out with a certain very influential friend, or disallowed party going – if we had known then what we know now. But the reality is that the clarity of hindsight is 20/20, and since we have yet to figure out time travel, NO ONE gets the benefit of actually knowing then what they know now, no one.

When something bad happens, it seems like it is second nature that people will try to find someone, something to blame. It happens with most everything, and we as parents of addicted kids will tend to do the same, and blame ourselves.

But in the end, we must eventually, seriously, contemplate the notion that ‘we did the best we could, with where we were in our own lives, with what we knew and didn’t’ know, in the circumstances that we were living with - at the time’.

And that is it, period. Without a doubt, this is so much easier said than done. But once we get to that point, we and our kids both will be better off. Why is this true?

Because first and foremost, once we release the parental guilt, the burden is lifted from us. Our load is lighter, we are free of the stress, and we are then more able to look forward at what constructive things we can do to help now, instead of looking backwards and lamenting the past. And let’s face it; we need all of the willpower and wit we can muster in order to make good decisions and act optimally for ourselves and our kids.

For instance, it is pretty tough to hold solid boundaries when we are plagued with guilt. And what’s more, if we have a lot of guilt, our kids will know it, and therefore try even harder to push the limits with boundaries. This puts us in an even more difficult position. Simply stated, with guilt we are less likely to be successful in holding healthy boundaries because we want to make our kids happy and/or make things ‘easier’ for them.

Also, guilt invites us try to make it up to them by doing too much for them, or giving them too much. If we feel guilty and think it is our fault, then we may be tempted to try to ‘make it up to them’, by buying them that car, those fun electronics, etc. that they have always wanted, thinking that it will ‘fix’ the problem, that those things might make them happy enough that they won’t want to use anymore. In essence we may be trying to buy their forgiveness. Since not having these things didn’t cause the addiction, having them definitely won’t fix it!

And finally, if we are willing to blame ourselves, inadvertently taking responsibility for what they are doing, then our kids are likely to let us do just that. Unfortunately this scenario will rob them of the chance of taking responsibility for themselves and their own actions, which is absolutely essential in every recovery modality! Effectively this gives them another place to put responsibility other than on themselves, if we are willing in any way to accept it! Ouch.

So finally, my wish for you and your child then, is for you to somehow find a way to tame the guilt monster and thereby tame the ineffective consequences of it. Please remember that ‘you did the best you could, with where you were in your own life, with what you knew and didn’t know, in the circumstances that you were living with - at the time’. And that NO ONE gets the benefit of knowing then what they know now.

Leslie Ferris is a Certified and Credentialed Life Coach Serving the parents of kids in treatment.

You can connect with her via her website at www.phase2foryou.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Phase2ForYou Twitter: https://twitter.com/Leslie_Ferris LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/leslieferris/

Redemption and Happiness Are Found in Recovery

By Joel Christiansen, Ed.S.

Alcoholism and addiction are thieves that will steal your soul, spirit, sanity and self and never feel guilty about doing it or apologize for it. Neither one of them has any shame. Their sole purpose is to separate you from yourself and all that you hold sacred in life. They are relentless, powerful, progressive, pervasive and confusing. They defy understanding. It is not like a person wakes up in the morning and says, “I want to be an alcoholic or an addict because that is how I can create the most wreckage in my life.” I don’t believe that is how it happens with alcoholics and addicts. It takes time to make them a habit. And know this to be true; they will be patient.

Redemption and happiness will never be found in the miserable pit of alcoholism or addiction. They will not be found in relapse. They can only be found in recovery. And recovery is not found in half measures. They will avail you nothing. An enduring recovery requires a full measure of commitment. You must devote as much time, energy and effort to it as you did to the disease of alcoholism and addiction. And the longer an alcoholic or addict defers making the commitment to get and stay straight and sober, the higher the price tag will be for finding recovery, redemption and happiness.

The search for recovery, redemption and happiness will not be found by shopping for them at empty stores, in a bottle or drugs, in clutter and more stuff, or in geographical and relationship cures. They are only found when you are aligned and in harmony with your true self.

No one needs to lead an alcoholic or an addict into temptation. They are perfectly capable of finding that on their own. They drink alone. They drug alone.

And at the depths of their drinking and drugging they find themselves alone.

What they can’t do is get and stay straight and sober alone.

Like attracts like. There is an old saying that if you hang around a barber shop long enough you will get a haircut. You hang around old playmates, playthings and playgrounds long enough you will relapse. You hang around those committed to recovery long enough you will stay in recovery. This principle has served me well since September 14, 1981 without a whiff of a relapse.

There are four conditions that lead to redemption and happiness. One—you need people in your life who will affirm, appreciate, value and love you. If that

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is absent in your life; then unless you are a masochist you should leave the relationship. Remember that like attracts like. Two—you need to find something to do in your life that you are interested in, curious about and have a passion for. That is where you will find purpose and meaning in your life. Three—you need to have something to look forward to that gives you hope. Everyone needs some hope to cope. Four—redemption and happiness happen only when you are aligned and in harmony with your true self. Alcoholism and addiction survive on deception and lies; harmony with your true self requires rigorous honesty. It is imperative in recovery that you make a commitment every day to be truthful, even to the point of painful irritation to your own comfort level. One of the best ways to make sure this happens is to get a good sponsor and establish a solid and loyal support system. They will serve as reality checks. You must have options to drinking and drugging; especially when you are tempted in the dark of night to “hook up” with your old playmates at your old playgrounds. You will need to replace the old “stinking thinking” patterns with “positive and hopeful” thinking and action. This means humbling yourself enough to call your sponsor when you might not want to, or to get yourself to a meeting when every part of your being wants to drink or drug. Every positive action step you take will make you stronger and more confident in your recovery.

So just what is the key to finding redemption and happiness in recovery?

Rigorous honesty, good sponsors, a solid support system and no false illusions that you can recover on your own is what it takes. It is called working your program. And when you work your program, your program will work for you. I have never known an alcoholic or addict to relapse who worked their program.

Relapse happens when you don’t.

There is an old saying in AA that you cannot keep what you are not willing to give away. Pass some of that recovery, redemption and happiness along. And you will be more likely to keep yours.

Joel Christiansen is President of Speaking Services and Learning Academy For Ethical Leadership. www.joelcspeaking.com Author: Out of the Ashes the Resurrection of an Addict (It can be ordered through Joel’s website)

Wayside House’s Success Rate High, says Its Medical Director

By Marlene Passell

Delray Beach – Dr. Ann Laughlin has been the medical director for Wayside House for 17 years. She’s seen many changes, but one thing has stayed the same – women coming to the addiction recovery center’s 90-day program are highly motivated and more than 75 percent of them are successful. She believes several things contribute to that. “The vast majority of women are here because they want to be; they’re highly motivated. They feel it’s a privilege to be at Wayside House,” she said.

Dr. Laughlin, a board certified psychiatrist, is the full-time chief medical officer for South County Mental Health Center. At Wayside House half a day per week, she oversees assessments, medication, and treatment plans and consults with staff therapists.

She said 90-day programs such as Wayside House’s prove much more successful than shorter residential programs and, the fact that the facility focuses solely on women also improves recovery rates. She sees 10 to 12 women per week at Wayside House and, over the years, has seen a change in who is seeking services.

For women by women

“Unfortunately, they are starting to use (drugs or alcohol) at a younger age.

We have women 18 to 20 who have been in jail when they come to us.”

Despite this, she said, “Women are voluntarily coming in for services and want to succeed when they get here.”

In addition to the residential program, Wayside House provides intensive outpatient, outpatient and other services. It also is under contract to provide mandated services for nurses who are seeking to reinstate their credentials after struggling with substance abuse.

For more information about Wayside House, please call 561.278.0055 or see our website at waysidehouse.net.

Marlene Passell is a journalist and communications professional who serves as communications consultant for Wayside House.

waysidehouse.net 561-278-0055

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Holistic Medicine And Why It Should Be Your First Option By: John Giordano DHL, MAC

Not long ago I experienced some chest pain while I was exercising at the gym. It wasn’t very intense and didn’t last long, but as a precaution I stopped at the emergency room on my way home. While I was being escorted to the examining room the nurse turned to me and held out a pill. Without explanation, she placed the pill in my hand and told me to swallow it. I ask what it was and she told me it was morphine. I explained to the nurse I was in recovery and couldn’t take that sort of thing to which she responded that I must. I protested and she became rather indignant and forceful. She told me in no uncertain terms that I had to take this pill because it was their policy without exemption. I continued to refuse and I’m sure you can see where this was headed. The exchange was heated and seemed like it went on for hours, but in reality it lasted for about five minutes.

I really didn’t think too much about my ER experience until a few months later when my son, who is also in recovery, had a freak accident and sprained his big toe. It didn’t appear too serious, but he went to an emergency room – different from the one I visited – just the same. Sure enough, they had the same policy. When my son refused the oxycodone offered by the attending nurse, she also got into a huff as she reiterated hospital policy with no exceptions. As he was leaving the ER, a nurse – fully cognizant that my son is in recovery – handed him thirty oxycodone pills to take home for pain management. I was in utter disbelief. When did it become hospital policy to give an addict in recovery thirty of the most addictive prescription painkillers on the planet for a sprained toe?

I would say that these experiences were not so much of an eye opener as they were a confirmation of just how much of a pill society we’ve become.

Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m very pro pharmaceutical. The industry has developed many life saving drugs and other remedies that contribute to a better quality of life for you and me. However I do feel as though the industry has strayed from the sentiments and endowment of Jonas Salk. I often wonder how we arrived here and why we don’t look at holistic medicine as the first option.

I feel so strongly about holistic medicine that I started the National Institute for Holistic Addiction Studies. NIFHAS is a non-profit organization comprised of the world’s leading authorities on addiction and holistic medicine. Dr. Kenneth Blum – discoverer of the addiction/alcohol gene – is our Chief Science Officer.

Our mission is to develop scientifically proven and evidenced based holistic addiction treatment modalities to which we have been successful in many areas. We also provide an educational program for qualified individuals interested in learning holistic medicine.

Perhaps our most important work is proving the efficacy of holistic medicine.

Many holistic therapies have been around for hundreds even thousands of years. They’ve stood the test of time but few people today realize just how effective holistic medicine really is. Our responsibility, as we perceive it, is to provide the public with empirical data resulting from scientific research and studies on holistic therapies so that they can make an intelligent informed healthcare decision.

Many times we’ll partner with other institutions with similar interests and goals like the McKnight Brain Institute at the University of Florida in Gainesville. Other times we conduct the studies unilaterally. To date we’ve contributed to over sixtyfive papers that have been published in peer-reviewed scientific and medical journals. These evidenced-based modalities have been scientifically proven to be an effective therapy and an alternative to the pill society we’ve become.

I have an advantage over most people when it comes to holistic medicine.

When I was young I got involved in Karate. It was my first exposure to eastern and alternative medicine; something I’ve practiced my entire life. Anyone who has been involved in Karate, even at an entry level, will tell you that endurance and ability to cope with pain associated with training can be your biggest opponent. Like any athletic endeavor, you’re asking your body to do things it’s never done before and for extended periods of time. This is where I discovered the importance of amino acids.

Aminos, as they are commonly referred to, are the building blocks of the body and mind. There are twenty-two amino acids with eight of them considered essential because they cannot be produced by the body, but rather must be sourced from food and/or supplements. I considered amino acids as my secret weapon when I was training for National Karate Tournaments; but it wasn’t until I began counseling addicts that I fully realized their benefits.

Amino acids affect nearly everything in your body from your metabolism to cognitive functions. Deficiencies in amino acids can contribute to chronic illnesses, anxiety, depression, alertness, attention span, learning, memory and general mood. They play such an important role in keeping the body healthy while balancing brain chemistry that I began formulating my own brand of

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amino acid supplements from the finest raw materials with addiction in mind.

Nutra Clarity has become very popular among addicts in rehab and recovery as well as health minded individuals. The results have been overwhelming.

People taking Nutra Clarity claim they feel an overall lift both mentally and physically. If you’d like more information on amino acid supplements please my website: http://www.NutraClarity.com So when was the last time your doctor asked you how your amino acid levels were doing? Exactly. If you think you may have an amino acid imbalance or a vitamin deficiency, check with a holistic doctor. Many have the capability to test you right in their office.

However, I don’t fault the doctors for not checking you for vitamin and amino acid deficiencies. The vast majority of doctors are doing the best they can within the parameters of a system they’re forced to work in. And the system is unfortunately emblematic to the challenges we face in healthcare in America today. Healthcare is our number one gross domestic product with nearly twentycents out of every dollar spent by you and me going to it. A behemoth of this size can dictate policy and procedures from the boardroom without the specifics of what is being discovered in the examining room. Doctors’ intuition seems to have been replaced by directives from shareholders. People with more intimate knowledge of the decisions being made behind the scenes have referred to our system as a one size fits all “Assembly Line Healthcare System.”

This is one of the bigger reasons why I always recommend trying holistic first.

Often the ailments you experience can be resolved quickly, efficiently and cost effectively with simple solutions with holistic medicine. Your ailment could be treated with non-toxic remedies as apposed to the toxic pills manufactured in laboratories. It could be as simple as adding something to your diet or taking a walk at the beginning or end of your day. There is only one way to find out and you always have the second option of AMA prescribed medicine.

Innovation is very rarely the trademark of big business. Their tendency is to do the same thing over and over again in the most profitable way possible. I don’t fault them, it’s what businesses do. However, this is another strong reason to take a look at holistic medicine first. During my career I’ve been involved in a variety of studies. I’ve contributed to over sixty-five papers published in peer reviewed medical and scientific journals. What I have found is that truly innovative therapies are coming from outside of the mainstream healthcare industry.

A great example of this is Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy. HBOT is an infant compared to other holistic medicines, yet its popularity is growing by leaps and bounds. Dr. Paul G. Harch has led the surge here in the U.S. He has appeared before Congress to testify on the enormous evidenced-based and scientifically proven health benefits of HBOT. But progress in implementing the therapy into the mainstream of medicine has been slow. This is particularly unsettling when Japan brags that no one is more than thirty minutes from a hyperbaric chamber.

Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy is the medical use of oxygen at a level higher than atmospheric pressure. Under normal circumstances, oxygen is transported throughout the body only by red blood cells. With HBOT, oxygen is dissolved into all of the body’s fluids, the plasma, the central nervous system fluids, the lymph, and the bone and can be carried to areas where circulation is diminished or blocked. In this way, extra oxygen can reach all of the damaged tissues and the body can support its own healing process.

Alcohol and drug abuse damage the brain in a way similar to that of carbon monoxide poisoning. Although there are currently 15 conditions treatable with Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy that are approved by the FDA, addiction treatment is not one of them. However HBOT has proven effective in rejuvenating damaged brain cells in people who have experienced other forms of brain trauma. I observed addicts using HBOT that gained cognitive function with just a few treatments. They say that HBOT improves their ability to process information while they experience more clarity.

Chronic pain seems to be ubiquitous these days. Too often people suffering from chronic pain are given a prescription for pain killers without looking into alternative options. It’s a quick and easy solution. However, the down side for the person suffering is that these pain killers are extremely toxic and addictive.

There are better holistic medicine options for pain management that are getting tremendous results without poisoning your body with the harsh toxins from pain killers and risk of addiction.

One option that is gaining in popularity is acupuncture. Granted, acupuncture does not fold neatly into our familiar western medicine consciousness, but it has been scientifically proven effective. This is a two-thousand year Continued from page 28

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17

My Friend/Family Member Just Went Through Rehab.

How Do I Fit Into Aftercare?

A Drug Education Article by Suncoast Rehab Center

Going through a drug and alcohol rehabilitation program is a life-changing adventure. And it should be. The person who completes rehab is often different from the person starting the program. On that same note, life after rehab should be nothing like life before rehab. Some have interpreted a drug free life as being an “idyllic dream that is nowhere close to reality,” but with proper treatment and a solid aftercare program, this dream is achievable.

An addict going into rehab has created a certain lifestyle. This way of living contained certain triggers/life situations which caused him to turn to drugs.

After rehab, this drug-free person would not want to return to that same environment. He may want to/need to avoid these triggers, perhaps changing jobs, friends, or even location.

One could say that an effective rehab program would help the individual understand what makes him feel drugs are the answer. Knowing the cause(s) enables the person to change his life to a structure which does not encourage dependence and addiction. Aftercare counselors help with this change, but it’s the person himself who is the one in charge and should determine his future.

As friends and family, you are an AMAZING part of the aftercare portion of rehab. You are the ones who care enough about this person to help him make those changes needed to begin a new life. This may mean you need to sacrifice his company or help him live away from those influences that harmed him. On the other hand, this may mean he needs your help to start a healthy hobby like hiking, ceramics, exercise, etc.

But know this: You are a key part of the recovery process.

One of the best ways to help a graduate who is changing his life through aftercare is by examining your own relationship and expectations of him. Were there specific expectations presented by the family which seemed too hard to attain? Do friends and family drink or smoke pot around the person who has just graduated from rehab? Has he been accepting handouts from family or the government when he should be a part of the work-force? These behaviors and many others may need to be re-evaluated and changed.

The best thing a friend or family member can do to help a graduate with aftercare is work to aid him in becoming more independent and more responsible for his own life. A supportive and encouraging attitude can be difficult to have when a person has harmed himself and others with drugs. However, rehab can and

does change a person. These changes and decisions made from that new point of view should be aided and encouraged during aftercare.

Part of making sure a rehab program is successful is really working with the counselors and seeing how you fit into the program and can help make the graduate’s new life a complete success.

Things should NOT be the same when he comes back home. What is best for you might not be what is best for the graduate. You may need to make some sacrifices.

But his aftercare program is based on what he can do and should do to stay clean.

Your support of him and the program will help get him there.

Now that we have discussed how important your support is, what are some general tips that can help you show your support? Here are a few: • Keep positive! This is a big step.

• Before he leaves treatment, see if you can contact the after-care counselor to see if there is anything you can do to help your friend/family member stay clean when he leaves.

• Keep in touch with his aftercare counselor as needed.

• Once he leaves treatment, be interested in him, find out what his aftercare program consists of and find out from him what you can do to help him achieve his new goals.

• Assist him emotionally in any way you can.

• Be aware that this may require a few major changes in actions/activities/job/ school/etc. Be prepared to work with him to make this happen. Remember, he is the one who just went through the rehab and a trained counselor worked with him to devise this program. If you don’t understand why he’s making some of those decisions, go ahead and ask him, but be sure to listen to and respect his answers. If you are very concerned and feel something doesn’t seem quite right, contact his aftercare counselor and discuss your concerns.

Finally, realize that this person is trying to change his life for the better. Be sure to help him in any way you can.

Thanks for being supportive and positive! Friends and family like you are incredibly important to those moving through rehab and into a new drug-free life.

If you have any questions, be sure to contact us 866-572-1788. We are available day and night.

Prescription Drug Addiction – Are Doctors Responsible?

By Marty Brenner

Are doctors or patients more responsible for prescription drug addiction?

iPod, car keys, credit card, and pill case with the ‘quick’ fixes of your choice.

Each year in the United States, approximately seven million people will use prescription drugs for non-medical purposes, and of that number, nearly 10% will obtain and use these drugs illegally. In a 1998 study, 1.6 million people reported using prescription drugs non-medically at least once. In 2006, 7.0 million people, or 2.8% of the U.S. population abused one or more prescription medications. Misuse of prescription medications has become a serious health problem in the U.S., leading heroin and cocaine as the cause of death from overdose in 2008.

Unfortunately, doctors are among the most common suppliers of prescription drugs that are abused today. According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), 70% of Americans see their primary care physician at least once every two years. These doctors are in the best position to identify and curb prescription dependence. Our fee-for-service health insurance system however, fosters a type of assembly line medical care that discourages the type of analysis that would enable a doctor to detect anomalies that might indicate drug dependence or abuse. In addition, most physicians are focused on eliminating pain or other symptoms, and drugs are often over prescribed and there is little follow up of the patient’s use of drugs. In the case of people who fake symptoms to get drugs, doctors often find it easier to prescribe than fight.

The most commonly abused prescription drugs are: - Painkillers like OxyContin and Vicodin - Tranquilizers or depressants like Valium and Xanax - Stimulants like Ritalin.

Addiction to prescription drugs usually follows some illness or injury for which the drug is prescribed. The patient, once addicted, finds himself in need of the drug long after the original illness has subsided, and can suffer severe withdrawal pain and discomfort when it is not available. Abusers often take cocktails of two or more medications, or drugs in combination with alcohol, sometimes with fatal consequences as in the case of actor Heath Ledger.

Individuals addicted to prescription drugs, like those addicted to illegal substances, will go to any lengths to obtain them. When they can’t get them from friends or relatives, or convince their doctor to write a prescription, they will lie; shop around for compliant doctors, and even fake medical conditions, just for a fix.

Part of the problem of prescription drugs in the U.S. is our obsession with ‘quick’ fixes to any and all problems, including medical problems. When we can’t sleep, have pain, feel depressed, or any other malady, we want an instant chemical solution. It has been jokingly said that it easier to get a Valium tablet from a stranger on the street these days than a cigarette. Among the younger set (late teens and young adults), getting ready to go out means making sure you have your phone,

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Doctors, therefore, must assume a significant portion of the blame for the epidemic of prescription drug abuse in this country. As previously mentioned, in 2006, 2.8% of the population reported non-medical use of prescription drugs. Painkillers accounted for 5.2% of abuse and tranquilizers 1.8%. While much of this is obtained illegally, much is obtained through prescriptions written by the family physician. In the final analysis, though, it is the individual who must shoulder the lion’s share of the responsibility for drug abuse, whether it is of prescription medicines or illegal narcotics. Doctors need to do a better job of monitoring their patients use of drugs, but the individual is the one who puts the pill on his or her own tongue, and is the one who has to take action to correct the problem.

I work with Individuals challenged with various addictions including but not limited to - substance abuse, alcohol, and anger. I am a Registered Addiction specialist and a Certified Anger Management specialist 11. If you or a family member or someone who you know is in trouble with substance abuse or anger, we can work together to determine what the best course of action to take on behalf of you and that individual who is seeking help.

I can help, call me when you need to talk: 213-500-8865. For more information about Marty and his practice , visit his web site at www.martybrenner.com

ANGER ADDICTION COUNSELING SERVICES

If you, a family member or someone you know is in trouble for Anger or Drug/Alcohol Abuse Call Marty

TALK TO

Marty

• Court Approved for Anger in Florida • Individualized sessions • Addiction Recovery and Life Coaching

213-500-8865 Marty Brenner, CCDC

Anger Management Specialist ll Certified Addiction Therapist C.A.T.ll Cer Con Conveniently Located in Del Ray Beach marty@talktomartyb.com www.martybrenner.com

“People can change” To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

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The Power of Families to Assist in Recovery

By Ed Hughes

Fourteen years ago my community was suddenly overwhelmed by the beginnings of the prescription opiate epidemic. In my thirty-plus years of addiction treatment experience I had never witnessed the speed with which a drug took control of the citizens in our area. The drug, Oxycontin, was new to us and was creating havoc for our young adults and their families.

I believe now more than ever that families can interrupt the progression of addiction, most often by ceasing to rescue, and initiate the development of a new “relationship” with their addicted loved one—a relationship that is not about protecting them from the consequences of addiction, but is instead about using those consequences as motivation toward recovery.

Within ten years of the onset of this epidemic, Scioto County, Ohio, had become the regional epicenter for the prescribing and dispensing of Oxycontin. In 2010 over 9.7 million doses of prescription pain killers were prescribed within our county of 84,000, enough for every man, woman, and child to receive 115 doses. Several million doses were prescribed through “pill mills,” of which we had ten operating locally. Within a five year period the percentage of clients being treated for opiate addictions at my agency rose from 5% to 60%. The current rate is over 85%, with a recent transition to heroin.

One night a father was waiting for me after a Loved Ones session. It was his first meeting and he had been quiet during the discussions. As we walked out together he said, “I wish I had met you $10,000 ago!” When I asked him to share his story, he told me that he had spent that much over the past three years in failed attempts to keep his son out of prison. I then asked the father how much incarceration time his son was facing when he first started “helping” him.

He answered, “Three months in the county jail, but I bailed him out. Then I paid for attorneys to get him out of trouble. Eventually he got in legal trouble that I couldn’t get him out of.” Then I asked how much prison time his son was facing, to which he replied, “Five years.” So not only had the father wasted money trying to prevent incarceration for his addicted son, but he had also inadvertently escalated the duration of the consequences from three months to five years.

The son may have responded to the earlier consequence of three months in jail, but he was not permitted to experience that consequence.

At the start of this epidemic we were inundated with parents, siblings, and grandparents frantically seeking information about what was happening to their loved ones. The addiction to this new drug was so powerful and progressed so rapidly that many families were overcome by its consequences and within a very short amount of time saw their loved one begin to use, become addicted, go to jail, go to prison, and then, too often, die from an accidental overdose.

In response, we moved quickly to establish a new program to help these families and simply called it Loved Ones. Each week we offered a free, opento-the-public educational/support session to answer the questions asked by families struggling with a loved one’s addiction. We provided information about addiction, the nature of the drug, and about recovery—but we also listened.

And as we listened to powerful stories of loss and confusion, we learned from these families. What soon became obvious was that the family’s efforts to help their loved ones were actually contributing to the continuing progression of the disease and its consequences.

The common theme among these families was one of rescuing and spending enormous resources to try to prevent or reverse the consequences of the disease.

They did not realize, however, that the root cause of those mounting consequences was the disease itself. So we began to focus our message on transitioning the family away from rescuing. And to this end we developed a useful tool, “Ten Ways Family Members Can Help,” which we distributed to every family member.

The Loved Ones concept evolved into a program of seven sessions, meeting weekly for one or two hours. Session One focuses on the importance of viewing addiction as a disease which allows family members to move beyond blaming themselves or others for their loved one’s addiction. This also sets the stage for permitting families to see the predictability of the disease, especially in terms of its consequences. Session Two outlines the progression of the disease, focusing particularly on how family members are affected, and Session Three describes the progression of problem behaviors and how rescuing intensifies the consequences. Session Four provides an opportunity to outline the importance of the “Ten Ways,” while Session Five describes how recovery happens and the family’s role in helping to initiate and support recovery. In Session Six we bring in a family member willing to share his or her experience with the Loved Ones’ principles, and in Session Seven a person recovering from addiction shares his or her enlightening story. We continue to rotate the seven sessions but a family member is welcome to join the group at any time.

A few years ago we recorded our seven-session series and made a DVD available. I also took what I learned and partnered with a good friend, Dr. Ronald Turner, and wrote the book Baffled by Addiction. As the DVD and book made their way into the public arena, I began to get requests from other communities wanting to start their own Loved Ones program. Although my agency does not directly sponsor these new groups, we work hard to support them. To date twelve other Loved Ones programs have formed within our tristate area. And while the groups utilize a variety of formats, they all stay true to the tenets of the original Loved Ones.

Also, as a part of our Loved Ones program, I offer to meet privately with families, also at no charge. This provides an opportunity for me to evaluate specific information about the addicted person and hear about the family dynamics at play. We then develop a strategy for addressing the rescuing behavior and assess the potential for motivating the addicted person toward treatment.

Over the past twelve years I have seen over a hundred addicted people make their way into treatment because their families took positive action to interrupt the progression of their loved one’s consequences. This has required that family members take difficult courses of action which are almost always counterintuitive to their natural instincts as parents, grandparents, or siblings. The families engaged in these demanding actions need support, encouragement, and sympathy. I repeatedly receive calls from family members who have attended Loved Ones saying, “I know what I need to do, but I need to hear one more time that I am doing the right thing, because it sure doesn’t feel right.”

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We have a “Golden Rule” in Loved Ones: Rarely does anyone recover from addiction until he or she is at least one crisis beyond the family’s ability to fix it, or the family’s willingness to fix it. Our goal, then, is to show families how allowing the occurrence of lesser consequences will provide the motivation for recovery. A “rock” bottom is not necessary.

Ed Hughes has served as Executive Director of The Counseling Center, Inc. since 1989. The Counseling Center is a multi-county program employing 175 staff with offices in Adams and Scioto Counties. The Counseling Center is the parent company for several well-known residential treatment programs including Stepping Stone House for Women, The Marsh House for Men, and the newest residential program, Second Chance Center. These residential programs serve clients from throughout the state. Ed received his Bachelor’s Degree in Sociology from Ohio University in 1975 and his Master’s Degree in Public Service Counseling from Western Kentucky University in 1979. He is a Licensed Independent Chemical Dependency Counselor. Ed is the author of Baffled by Addiction? Effective Strategies to Help Your Addicted Loved One.

LET’S EXPLORE THE LEARNED COMPONENT OF MOTIVATION

By Darlene Silvernail PhD LMHC CAP

Let’s explore the learned component of motivation in relation to substance use, abuse, and addiction to understand the concept better.

The development of substance dependence can be seen as part of a learning process. For instance, if you heard from somewhere that a drink at the end of a hard day’s work lessens your stress and helps you unwind and if commercials also advertise this notion and support this thinking, then environmental factors support your decision to use alcohol and drugs to cope with stress. Motivation and incentive are important concepts with regard to substance dependence.

A person abusing a substance experiences a psychoactive effect. This effect is highly rewarding or reinforcing and activates the circuits in the brain that makes it more likely that this behavior will be repeated. The brain has systems that have evolved to guide and direct behavior toward stimuli that are critical to survival (Robbins & Everitt, 1996). Therefore, each time the person feels stressed, he or she associates it with a drink or a pill (associated learning; conditioned stimuli). Let’s look at an example.

Stimuli associated with drinking and coping with stress activate specific pathways and reinforce the behaviors that lead to obtaining corresponding goals (Cardinal, Parkinson, Hall, & Everitt, 2002). Psychoactive substances artificially activate the same pathways, which are activated by important stimuli, such as food, water, danger, and mates. The brain is tricked by the substances into responding as if the substances and their associated stimuli are biologically needed, therefore, leading to enhanced motivation to continue this behavior (Robinson & Berridge, 2000).

Thus, according to this theory, dependence is the result of a complex interaction of the physiological effects of substances on brain areas associated with motivation and emotion, combined with learning about the relationship between substances and substance-related cues (Robbinson & Berridge, 2000).

Dr. Silvernail is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor with a PhD in Psychology and Addictionology Counseling. Dr. Silvernail is the CEO of Silvernail Consultant Services, (www.SilvernailConsultantServices.com) and currently is the Clinical Supervisor for Total Recovery Now in Lake Worth.

To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

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After the war on drugs...

By Barbara Allen

Spring, 2009. After the war on drugs? Scanning down the list of hits from an online search, I see this phrase and am stunned by the words. Long time meditation practices have taught me to notice strong reactions when they arise. Quieting the urge to click on the link, I realize a cool breeze of hope has begun to caress my mind. My heart is lifting; my blood pressure is dropping.

Did I miss some apocalyptic event? Who is behind such a thought? After a forty year war on drugs that seems to be chasing its tail? Everything shifts as excitement leaps forward and click.

Why do I care? My son, Jim, gone since 2003 - overdose. My brother Bill- killed when a friend was tweaking on crystal meth years before. My niece, Amanda, ended her suffering in 2010. It’s too late for them. Something has kept me researching and learning about this horrible disease when others tell me to let it be and go sit on a beach. No longer do I have to focus on finding treatment options, worrying about if or when the call would come or praying my heart out…so why do I still continue learning about the disease of addiction?

Am I looking to shake off mind numbing hopelessness and a sense of total failure as a mom? My research began to widen a year after Jim died. Like falling into a bottomless abyss I was overwhelmed by the breadth and depth of this problem. $75,000,000 is spent on drug research positions looking for candidates. The annual cost of the war on drugs to you and me is $41,300,000,000 according to the CATO Institute. To Read more, go to this website: www.cato.org/publications/white-paper/budgetary-impactending-drug-prohibition.

Who knew about the connection between the farmers in Tajikistan and drugs circulating in the US? Who knew about former Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s failed efforts to rid sections of New York City from drug dealers before 9/11? With every local, state and federal resource available, nothing made a dent in the problem. Who knew about civilians and young boys being killed by cartels in Ciudad Juárez‎ and El Paso resulting from the battle for turf? Why is Route 35 ideal for moving drugs deep into the heartland of the US and into Canada?

Have you ever heard of the Narcotic Farm in Lexington, Kentucky? It was the first prison/rehabilitation center specifically for addiction founded in 1934 (presently known as NIDA in Baltimore, MD). Substance addiction research in the US began within its grounds. Echoing off the walls of the Farm was some of the best jazz music of that time. Much of this information and more is generally unknown today.

In 2007 I began giving presentations to other parents and siblings who have lost loved ones to the disease of addiction. My heart breaks at the denial and shame that is present. Many fear being honest about the addicts suffering and the cause of their death. Yet everyone wants to love and honor their family members. Shame thrives in darkness; only light heals. No one should ever feel the need to hide the love of their children.

I started No Shame or Blame ~ Just Love®. These are wristbands given in memory of my children, and they are flying out the door. Perhaps these will help others find hope. Maybe they will be worn on the wrist of those suffering this disease. All need to know they matter!

Fifty moms, dads and siblings have gathered in Bel Air, MD. Struggling to keep their kids alive, they are tired and losing hope. Some are broke or mortgaged to the max.

One man asks, “Why are you doing this? Why aren’t you sitting on a beach reading trash novels instead of talking to folks like us?” My answer is simple, “As long as someone suffers the disease of addiction, as long as a parent, grandparent and/or sibling struggle to save a life, I’m on a crusade to be part of the change.“ My husband and I were in a massive bookstore in Portland, Oregon. Tom spotted a compendium of well-known addicts and alcoholics. Just the sort of book Jim would have found. I had no clue – poets, presidents, business leaders, artists, entertainers, children of the well known. The toll of this disease is long and ever shifting like sand on a beach. This disease is an epidemic, growing worse instead of lessening. Efforts to re-educate about tobacco have successfully changed the landscape in usage. Today, prescription drugs lead the death polls along with life threatening fads like bath salts and smoking alcohol.

We launched the website Shatter The Stigma in early 2011.The site offers hope, dignity and education to those who suffer from the disease of addiction and those who love them. You can order wristbands, request prayers…no charge except for help with postage. Others share, too. Read an informative book? Find an organization making a difference? Come across an important news item? Posted for all to find!

An invitation crosses my desk. The CATO Institute is hosting a conference: Ending the Global War on Drugs, November 15, 2011 in Washington, D.C. Will a bereaved mom be welcome? Many are there as part of their jobs; where is their passion? I then met Howard, the COP on the Hill. He’s a retired law enforcement officer who supports decriminalizing drugs. He introduces me to others from law enforcement, the medical field and other parents like me – all pushing for legal changes, for humanity to be

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added to the dialogue.

As the speakers begin the dais comes alive with passion! There is a former councilman from El Paso, former DEA agents, journalists from Central America and Mexico, a former Director of Drugs from India, former Secretary of State George Shultz, and on it goes. This is a panel of distinguished speakers urging reforms to help save lives, to make the world a safer place, and to heal from an epidemic that continues to grow. Fed by fear, ignorance and greed, rather than science and heart, the war is a failed policy. Smarter, more powerful people than I care about this issue!

They are not only from the US, this is a global initiative.

Too excited to sleep despite the long day, I pull out the 2009 report, After the War on Drugs: Blueprint for Regulation. The consortium who put this report together proposed a system so comprehensive and sweeping it seemed impossible. After a day spent with so many others working for change, maybe daylight is coming. Where can I see this in action?

Portugal! Discussed in many presentations, the best source to learn more about this is in the pamphlet: Drug Decriminalization in Portugal: Lessons for Creating Fair and Successful Drug Policies. www.cato.org/events/drug-decriminalizationportugal what seemed a dream when I first read the 2009 report has actually been in place for over ten years in Portugal as of November 2011. Had I known, would I have taken Jim there to save his life? Would that have worked?

Everywhere I turn there are wonderful people working to make a difference. The focuses vary widely; all are important. Volunteer driven change is critically needed and groups are popping up everywhere trying to make a difference. I will do my part, too.

April 2, 2003. Tom, my brother Tim and I are leaving the last place Jim lived - a halfway house in Phoenix. Sitting for a while with the director and his assistant, Tom and Tim wait by the car. We’ve collected Jim’s things. Crossing the parking lot as the sun begins to set, I suddenly find myself…somewhere else.

A waking dream? It is night. I’m standing outside a large wooden door with a brilliant light above it. Next to the door is a sign reading, James’ Place. Curious, I open the door and my heart leaps with joy! Inside crowds of people are gathering, greeting each other with hugs and smiles. Behind them I notice a host of doors leading into what appears to be meeting rooms. A bell sounds and folks begin heading towards various doorways. I want to join in; the feeling of welcome and love is enthralling. As I step to the threshold of the heavy door, I’m suddenly back in the parking lot in Phoenix.

Shocked, upset and confused, I stumble. The guys reach for me and ask if I am okay.

They look puzzled. I take the back seat as we head out of the parking lot. Drawing from what I had just seen, I make furious notes. We buried Jim the day before. Softly crying, I‘m not sure why. I was on the verge of entering a place of great love when a door slammed shut. What does this mean? For years I wonder if I’m to create something named James’ Place.

After ten years of integrating the losses, being with others who struggle for life, learning from so many, the answer is James’ Place Inc. We turn our energies into offering hope in the form of scholarships for recovery services for the disease of addiction. We work to open doors of healing to those who need access.

James’ Place just received its 501(c) (3) status from the IRS; this alone feels monumental. All the effort of organizing, collaborating, teaming with others kicks into higher gear as the real work begins.

Jim fought hard to live. As with other life threatening diseases such as cancer, diabetes or epilepsy, he found a way to have some great years before the disease won. Like all who suffer from this disease, dignity and respect are the rights of every human who draws breath.

Armed with respect, offering dignity to all, James’ Place Inc. continues to educate, raise funds and to partner with recovery programs. Others will change local and national laws, offer medical care and counseling – each group taking aim on that which is most important to them. Together we are all making a difference. We join our voices to the wave of reform and hope is now gaining momentum across not just the US but the world.

Our loved ones matter; so does our sanity and the future of generations to come. We salute all who are part of this massive wave of change. Wage hope!

Barbara Allen is Executive Director of James’ Place Inc. A former executive in the computer industry, she is a leadership coach and yoga instructor. Barbara serves on the Board of Directors for The Compassionate Friends and is active on many state and national councils for substance related efforts. She lives in Ellicott City, MD with her husband Tom and their yoga cat, Mr. Mestophiles. www.shatterthestigma.com

To Advertise, Call 561-910-1943

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DRUG TREATMENT AND CRIME

By Myles B. Schlam, Jd, Cap/Ccjap/Icadc

Sending drug abusers to community-based treatment programs rather than prison could help reduce crime and save the criminal justice system billions of dollars, according to a new study by researchers at RTI International and Temple University.

Nearly half of all state prisoners are drug abusers or drug dependent, but only 10 percent receive medically based drug treatment during incarceration. Untreated or inadequately treated inmates are more likely to resume using drugs when released from prison, and commit crimes at a higher rate than non-abusers.

The study, published online in November in Crime & Delinquency, found that diverting substance-abusing state prisoners to community-based treatment programs rather than prison could reduce crime rates and save the criminal justice system billions of dollars relative to current levels. The savings are driven by immediate reductions in the cost of incarceration and by subsequent reductions in the number of crimes committed by successfully-treated diverted offenders, which leads to fewer re-arrests and re-incarcerations.

“Substance abuse among offenders continues to concern policy makers because of its high prevalence and its effect on criminal behavior,” said Gary Zarkin, Ph.D., vice president of the Behavioral Health and Criminal Justice Research Division at RTI and the study’s lead author. “Given the obvious burden on the criminal justice system and society caused by substance abuse within this population, diverting offenders to effective and targeted substance abuse treatment leads to less drug use, fewer crimes committed, and costs savings.”

The findings were based on a lifetime simulation model of a cohort of 1.14 million state prisoners representing the 2004 U.S. state prison population.

The model accounts for substance abuse as a chronic disease, estimates the benefits of treatment over individuals’ lifetimes, and calculates the crime and criminal justice costs related to policing, trial ,sentencing, and incarceration. The researchers used the model to track the individuals’ substance abuse, criminal activity, employment and health care use until death or up to and including age 60, whichever came first. They also estimated the benefits and costs of sending 10 percent or 40 percent of drug abusers to community-based substance abuse treatment as an alternative to prison. According to the model, if just 10 percent of eligible offenders were sent to community-based treatment programs rather than prison, the criminal justice system would save $4.8 billion when compared to current practices.

Diverting 40 percent of eligible offenders would save $12.9 billion.

The results clearly demonstrate how diversion from prison to communitybased treatment will benefit the United States and the criminal justice system.

To be more useful for policy makers, this model should be implemented on a state level, which would provide more specific data on criminal behavior, the prevalence of treatment programs and state criminal justice costs.

Drug enforcement experts say the evidence strongly supports wider use of drug courts, which seek to impose treatment regimens instead of prison sentences on repeat criminals that are dependent on illegal drugs. West Huddleston, of the Alexandria, Virginia-based National Association of Drug Court Professionals, said a convicted criminal who successfully completes a court-imposed treatment regimen is nearly 60 percent less likely to return to crime than those who go untreated.

There are more than 2,600 drug courts operating in the United States.

But they reach only a fraction of drug-addicted offenders. According to Chandler, 5 million of an estimated 7 million Americans who live under criminal justice supervision would benefit from drug treatment intervention.

But only 7.6 percent actually receive treatment. Inasmuch as drug abuse can facilitate criminal behavior, this is a good time to take a closer look at how the science in substance abuse has started to provide some answers on how to solve these problems.

The crimes associated with drug abuse include sale or possession of drugs; property crimes or prostitution to support drug habits; and violent crimes reflecting out-of-control behavior. In fact, offender drug use is involved in more than half of all violent crimes and in 60 to 80 percent of child abuse and neglect cases. It is estimated that 70 percent of the people in state prisons and local jails have abused drugs regularly, compared with approximately 9 percent of the general population.

When drug abusers enter the criminal justice system, it signals a pivotal crisis in their lives. It also offers a unique opportunity to institute treatment for drug abuse and addiction. Studies have consistently shown that comprehensive drug treatment works. It not only reduces drug use but also curtails criminal behavior and recidivism. Moreover, for drug-abusing

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offenders, treatment facilitates successful reentry into the community. This is true even for people who enter treatment under legal mandate.

In a Delaware work-release research study sponsored by the National Institute on Drug Abuse, those who participated in prison-based treatment -- followed by ongoing post-release care -- were seven times more likely to be drug-free and three times more likely to be arrest-free after three years than those who received no treatment. Other studies report similar findings.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration reports that substance-abuse treatment cuts drug abuse in half and reduces criminal activity by as much as 80 percent.

If treatment works, then why have some communities resisted offering comprehensive treatment programs to drug-abusing offenders? One reason is that addiction is still often seen as something for the individual to deal with. The other is the cost.

Science now tells us that repeated drug exposure affects the areas of the brain that enable people to exert control over their desires and emotions, which may explain why it is so difficult for an addict to abstain. Drugs also affect areas of the brain responsible for the perception of pleasure and punishment, for learning and cognition, and for motivating our behaviors.

These findings have led to the idea of addiction as a complex disease of the brain that cannot be managed with a stern moral lecture -- or even with a period of forced sobriety in jail. If we understand that, we can better understand how to manage drug-abusing offenders.

Some reject the concept of addiction as a disease on the grounds that it removes responsibility from the addict. But in fact it gives the addicted person the responsibility for seeking and maintaining treatment for the disease, just as is the case for other diseases.

Some courts and communities have also resisted offering comprehensive treatment because of fears of high costs. But recent studies show it is actually less expensive for communities to treat drug-abusing offenders than to let them sit in jail or prison. It is estimated that every dollar invested in addiction treatment programs yields a return of $4 to $7 in reduced drugrelated crimes. Savings for some outpatient programs can exceed costs by a ratio of 12 to 1. It costs the tax payers an average of $150/day to keep an inmate incarcerated.

Some criminal justice systems are working on innovative approaches to dealing with drug-abusing offenders. In Cook County, Ill., for example, NIDA sponsors a pilot project that trains judges on how addiction affects the brain so they can be better prepared to place addicted defendants in adequate treatment environments. Last month NIDA released a report titled “Principles of Drug Abuse Treatment for Criminal Justice Populations.”

These principles emphasize the need for customized strategies that can include cognitive behavioral therapy, medication, and consideration of other mental and physical illnesses. Continuity of care after reentry into the community is also essential. Drug offenders should be referred to private court-approved treatment facilities whenever they have health insurance coverage or the ability to pay for treatment, thus shifting the cost of treatment onto the offenders and not society.

The ultimate goal of treatment, of course, is to help an addict stop using drugs.

As a licensed clinician and Criminal Justice Addiction Professional, I don’t remember ever meeting an addicted person who wanted to be addicted or who expected that compulsive, uncontrollable or even criminal behavior would emerge when he or she started taking drugs. Providing drug-abusing offenders with comprehensive treatment saves lives and protects communities.

In our experience, a criminal case can sometimes be the turning point for a substance addicted or abusing client. Our endeavor is to guide them through this process with the hopes that they will find recovery and not become recidivists in the criminal justice system. ASI is available for consultations, and both in and out-of-custody evaluations by appointment only. We are also approved to conduct court-ordered evaluations. We work together with a large network of Treatment Providers throughout Florida and the USA. Clients who suffer from a Mental Health Disorder in addition to Substance Abuse will be referred to one of our Dual Diagnosis facilities. *Myles B. Schlam is a nationally recognized expert in Drug Addiction and the Criminal Justice System and an Internationally Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor (ICADC). He is one of approximately 100 Criminal Justice Addiction Professionals (CCJAP) in the State of Florida. Mr. Schlam is a graduate from St. Thomas University School of Law (Class of ’02) where he specialized in criminal law and interned with the Public Defender’s Office. ASI is licensed by the Florida Department of Children and Families and operates in throughout the State of Florida.

ADV E RT I S I N G O P P O RT U N I T I E S

I have been receiving many requests from people all over the country wanting to subscribe to The Sober World. Since we are a FREE magazine it is impossible to accommodate everyone as much as I would like to. We are now offering an E-version of the magazine so all can enjoy. If you are interested in having a copy e-mailed, please send your request to patricia@thesoberworld.com For Advertising opportunities in our magazine please contact Patricia at 561-910-1943.

Coming soon!! By mid-October, you will also have the opportunity to advertise on our newly designed website at www.thesoberworld.com Please visit us on Face Book at The Sober World or Sober-World Steven Again, I would like to thank all my advertisers that have made this magazine possible, and have given us the ability to reach people around the world that are affected by drug or alcohol abuse. I can’t tell you all the people that have reached out to thank us for providing this wonderful resource.

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Breaking the Cycle of Addiction in Families

By Dena Sisk Foman

Being born into my family meant that there was an underlying assumption that addiction would be a part of my life. My father and mother were both children of alcoholics. Being raised by addicts created a sub-culture that hypnotized my mind to believe that the turmoil was somehow normal. When your idea of “normal” is different than mainstream, the natural tendency is to look for friends and partners that fit your idea of normal. Watching a fist fight between my parents was normal. Infidelity was normal. Having drunk men in my personal space as a teenager was normal. Having marijuana at the family Christmas party was just a part of the holiday celebration.

Growing up I was constantly torn between the reality of home life and the lessons from school, my friends and church.

It was only natural that my parents both followed the paths of their parents.

By the time I was 11 years old, my mother had abandoned our family and moved to Florida. My mother started small with alcohol and marijuana and then eventually graduated to a full-blown crack-cocaine addict. My mother, a 62 year old woman, remains an active user to this day. My father dove deep into his drinking addiction after my mother left. My father tried to quit drinking numerous times but it took over 25 years before he would become sober. While he was around in person, mentally he was absent from our lives. After being confronted with losing his family, my father made the choice to get help and has been in recovery for over fifteen years. Thankfully, as an adult I have been able to experience what it is like to have a “real” parent. I have forgiven my father and my mother for their circumstances and have come to accept how it all happened.

I believe that if a child is raised and surrounded by alcoholism, drugs and all of the drama that surrounds the disease, that the child will go one of two ways: a) towards the addiction (their learned idea of “normal”) or b) as far from the addiction as possible. For me, seeing my mother snort cocaine up her nose made me angry. Cocaine took my mother away from me and I grew up as a young woman without a mother, and a father that was there as much as he was able. I blamed the cocaine for taking my mother from me. In my mind there was no way that I would join forces with something that I felt ruined my life as a child. My sister, on the other hand, often did drugs with my mother. She needed my mother’s acceptance so bad that she would do anything to get it, even if that meant doing drugs with her.

Unfortunately, my sister’s fate was sealed as she was not strong enough to separate and today she is an active heroin addict.

So how does one born into the cycle of addiction escape? For me, I sought out the safe people in my life as a child. My grandmother was the victim of an abusive alcoholic husband but I would call anyone a liar that said she ever picked up one drink. She was a God-fearing woman that lived her life by her interpretation of the Bible. She loved those around her that drank but would give them a good “talking to” about the evils of their actions. I spent much of my younger days with my grandmother. It was quiet and simple in her home. My grandmother helped me to develop a strong sense of right and wrong. Although I spent many years running the streets as a teenager

and young adult and did my share of drinking, I always had a vision of her peering down at me with one of her “do the right thing” talks. I wish she were here to see that even though I did quit school, married an abusive alcoholic and got pregnant as a teenager that I did get it together. I got my GED and went back to college and then eventually to law school. While she did not understand such things as college, nonetheless, I think she would be proud.

My escape from the addiction cycle did not come without a price. I had to make a choice whether blood was enough to keep in me in a trap. I am a firm believer that you have to be careful who is in your close circle even if those people are your family. It took me a while to learn that the many addicts in my family expected something from me. In addition to expecting that I would give them money, they also expected a certain behavior of me.

It was almost as if they wanted me to apologize for leaving the lifestyle. I cannot count the times where I have been told how I think I am better than others. When I graduated from college my own sister would not speak to me and admitted that she was angry because she had not gone to school.

I did not love her or respect her any less because of her education level but somehow she convinced herself that I had formed an opinion of her.

While I was not angry, I knew that if I chose to be around my family that there would be nothing I could do to make them accept me and to celebrate my successes. I was not willing to forgo my success because of their insecurities for which I had no control. I went seven years without speaking to my mother and very rarely speak to my sister. I love them both dearly but unfortunately they are not good for me. I have a family now and when they are invited into my life, it only takes a few minutes to learn that they are back for them, not me. I have accepted that I can do nothing to change them and that all I can do is love from a distance and pray for them. If I do not protect my space, I will be sucked into the drama that surrounds the life of a 62 year old crack cocaine addict and a 40 year old heroin addict.

My hope is that as we become more aware of the disease of alcoholism and associated mental illnesses, that more focus will be placed on the long term effects of this disease on children of addicts. The trauma of being raised in a family that has active users in the home exposes children to things they should never have to witness such as violence and open drug use. The damage is done as a child but follows the adult for life unless the adult seeks help. The stigma and shame associated with discussing these things keeps many from speaking out about what they have experienced and thus, no one knows the secret lives of families of addicts.

We can and we should change the outcome for many of our children living in the homes of addicts. We should be willing to share and discuss the stories of families openly and without fear so that there is an awareness element. After all, how can help be obtained if no one knows it exists?

Dena Sisk Foman, Esquire, is a partner at the law firm of McLaughlin & Stern, LLP and the author of the book Only I Can Define Me: Releasing Shame and Growing into My Adult Self.

Living to learn series: Conquering the Stress-Anxiety-Addiction (S-A-A) Spiral

By Karen R. Rapaport, Ph.D., ABPP

Addiction, based on self-deception can be described as a self-defeating pattern of trying to solve the same problem using outdated solutions. This is a form of the S-A-A spiral: we perceive a situation as out of control, and avoid the attendant anxiety through compulsive use of substances. Millions of Americans have some difficulty in managing the stressful pace of their lives, along with anxieties about work, relationships, family, and financial status. These anxieties and stressors affect the way we use food, alcohol or other substances.

Research has revealed that most visits to internists and family physicians are for physical symptoms reflecting psychological issues, stress and abuses of the body. Conquering the S-A-A spiral requires: (a) A structured series of techniques for the management of current daily challenges. (b) Confronting old habit patterns with new strategies. Patients with a history of trauma in particular, need specific behavioral plans to self-soothe and counter compulsion, and to integrate psychological strengths.

Treatment plans are targeted toward eliminating the cyclic quality of S-A-A,

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and are tailored to assist each individual in breaking the self-defeating pattern of S-A-A. Yet, a background of spirituality-mindfulness is helpful to most people.

Learning the skills to manage time, work and home structuring, provides emotional containment allowing an opportunity for reframing a perspective on problems, and focusing on constructive goals.

Including hypnotherapy and /or EMDR for the physiological and emotional aspects of S-A-A, and for management of compulsion – addiction, accelerates progress in defeating the S-A-A spiral.

Karen R. Rapaport, Ph.D., ABPP: Dr. Rapaport holds a Diplomate (Board Certification) in Clinical Psychology, is licensed in FL, and is a Fellow of the Academy of Clinical Psychology (FAClinP). She has had extensive work experience with adults, couples, groups, teens and children, and psychological assessment. Specializing in work with trauma survivors (PTSD), including sexual abuse in adults molested as children, and survivors of emotional and physical abuse, she is also an EMDR practitioner.

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Emotional Core Therapy

By Robert A. Moylan, LCPC

To my friends at The Sober World I want to say thank you for having me as a guest writer for your magazine. It is with great excitement and passion that I share with you my approach to treating addictions. I have written two books this past year. “Emotional Core Therapy” and “Emotional Core Therapy for Adolescents”. My book,” Emotional Core Therapy” is currently the top rated book on Amazon.com under two categories (Emotions and Mental Health) . My book for teens, “Emotional Core Therapy for Adolescents” is currently ranked sixth on Amazon.com under the same categories. The reason they are ranked so high is that my behavioral psychology approach is the simplest and most effective treatment available worldwide for the treatment of relationship stress. Relationship stress can come in many forms. This includes addictions, depression, anxiety, anger, as well as any relationship stress that occurs when people interact with each other.

Why is my Emotional Core Therapy (referred to as ECT) approach so simple?

First of all, there are only eight key concepts to learn to fully understand my approach. Since two of these concepts happen almost automatically, it really only takes understanding five or six key concepts to fully grasp .Since The Sober World primarily deals with addictions, I will discuss this topic in detail here.

Prior to the publishing of my ECT books, the best approach to addictions was the Twelve Step Process. The Twelve Steps require you to learn about a “higher power” sometimes referred to as “God” as well as learn 12 concepts that will help you recover from an addiction. My approach does not use a higher power and only has eight concepts. That makes my approach much less burdensome to learn than the twelve steps. Furthermore, Emotional Core Therapy is all based on modern psychology.

I have nothing against the Twelve Steps to Recovery. They have helped millions of people. I personally have attended meetings for AA as an adolescent and as an adult. I did this as both my father and brother both suffered from addiction and mental health issues. Both died tragically young. I have dedicated my practice as a therapist to my brother Philip, who died at the young age of 36 from an alcohol related incident.

As a child I grew up in a household with 12 siblings and an alcoholic father. Often my father would come home from the tavern drunk and raging. I was so terrified that I developed acute anxiety. One day he burned a mattress while sleeping and started a fire. I pleaded with my mother to get him out of the house. My father moved into an apartment a mile from home. A month later he died in a fire.

I was only 13 years old at the time. There was a lot of shame in my life at that point. A few times when I was 12 years old, I actually had to wear diapers, as my anxiety was very high. I had a great deal of fear when he was around.

Soon after he passed away my fear diminished. Although we were poor and received government assistance, I still found time to study and learn. The west side of Chicago where I lived presented some choices for me to make as far as living healthy or getting into trouble. I often equate my childhood to the character “Nell” played by Jodie Foster in the movie of the same name. Nell was a young girl who grew up in the woods without any human beings around.

Although I grew up in a large home, I spent most of my time in the streets. My mother worked as a waitress full time and my siblings were too young to care for me as best they tried.

I have found over these past 40 years (I am 51 years old) that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. A stronger human being. Being forced into a life of emotional pain as a youth was something I hated very much. I would do almost anything to get out of pain. That is why mental health is such a priority for me. I love to study, learn and help people grow.

I have practiced and perfected my “Emotional Core Therapy” approach over a period of 40 years. I have spent my professional thirty year career as a teacher, coach, and counselor helping others, just as I was helped as a teen and young adult. When I was young there were not a lot of treatment options for the debilitating anxiety, depression, and mild addiction issues that I suffered. Only time and prayer helped me. Once I went to college, I sought help through a counselor. I then gained some insight into my world of pain.

Over the years, the vast majority of my clients who suffer the pains of addictions have told me of their frustration with the Twelve Step Method to recovery, although they praise the support groups approach that the Twelve Steps offer. I would say I only use the Twelve Step Treatment for 3% of my clients. The other 97% I use the Emotional Core Therapy (ECT approach). The reason being is the simplicity of it. One of my clients shared with me a scenario. “If I needed a hip replacement, why would I have to accept God or spirituality in my life first before getting treatment” The same approach holds true for mental health and addiction issues. Also, many of my clients don’t believe in religion or have a religious upbringing different from Christianity. The Twelve Steps doesn’t effectively reach that audience.

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I want to give hope to all the readers of The Sober World that there exists effective treatment for addiction. The key is to have a trained professional with experience in addiction and mental health issues helping you through the therapy process. As humans, we often get stressed out. This happens to both teens and adults. Some people get anxious, depressed, and angry. Others turn to drugs. My approach teaches you to honor your authentic feelings. ECT helps you to identify stress, release it and get back to a peaceful state of being.

What I mean by honoring your feelings is to gain insight into how you are feeling. I am very open about my feelings to everyone I meet. I have found that our American culture tries to hide from fear and grief as they think this is a sign of weakness. “Much of America was built 100-150 years ago with a culture that supported the “Protestant Work Ethic”. It was thought to be noble and virtuous to be strong and silent and work hard and not discuss negative emotions. This type of belief of holding emotions within oneself still prevails today. My approach teaches one to externalize and cathartically release negative emotions. This new approach is much better for the mind and body.”

This work ethic had positive side effects and helped build America. However, my research proves that fear and loss are a major part of life. These two feelings are as prominent as joy. All the self-help gurus want to talk about is joy but few really teach you to learn from emotional pain. Both my books cover cases that I have treated in a very simple storytelling manner that is easy to read. I have found through the hundreds of folks reading my book that the process of reading about emotions can be empowering. I want all the readers of The Sober World to have power, strength, and vitality. The best way to learn that is through the knowledge of the human body and mind. Good luck to all of you and have a safe and prosperous life. Life is so very precious. Don’t be weakened by addictions when help is right around the corner.

Robert A. Moylan has worked for over 30 years as a teacher, coach and counselor. He is the author of two books-Emotional Core Therapy and Emotional Core Therapy for Adolescents. He delivers lectures on his Emotional Core Therapy techniques as well as bullying, substance abuse and career counseling. He currently works as a psychotherapist with offices in Naperville and Lisle, Illinois. You may e-mail Robert at bmoylan111@yahoo.com or call 630-788-1100. www.robertmoylan.com www.illinoisduicounseling.com

Holistic Medicine And Why It Should Be Your First Option By: John Giordano DHL, MAC

Continued from page 16

old science that has withstood the test of time. According to the U.S. National Institutes of Health (NIH) there are promising findings in studies of acupuncture efficacy in alleviating many kinds of pain, such as chronic lowback pain. Acupuncture is definitely worth your while to at least check out.

Post World War II was a definitive time in American medicine. The momentum created by the needs of war led to so many advancements in medicine that doctors and researchers were exuberant with confidence in finding cures for a myriad of diseases in their very near future. But something changed in the years that followed. Somewhere along the line someone discovered it was more profitable to treat the symptoms than the causes. Jonas Salk was a carry over from the pre WW II era and the last of his breed. At the time of his discovery in 1955, Polio was the most frightening public health problem in America. People were dying at an alarming rate. The disease struck fear into the hearts of every single parent.

Jonas Salk never patented his polio vaccine. People called this act Salk’s gift to the world. In his now famous interview, Salk was asked by legendary journalist Edward R. Murrow who owned the patent on the vaccine. Salk responded with the most quoted statement of his illustrious career: “Well, the people, I would say. There is no patent. Would you patent the sun?” Inferring that he had moral issues with creating a barrier between his vaccine and the throngs of people who needed it to survive. The Salk vaccine saved millions of lives.

Are lines being crossed? I suppose it would depend on which side of the line you’re standing.

John Giordano DHL, MAC is an addiction counselor and Chaplain of the North Miami Police Department. For the latest development in cutting-edge treatment check out his website: http://www.holisticaddictioninfo.com

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A Better Way to Recover from Alcoholism and Drug Addiction

By Harold C. Urschel III, M.D., M.M.A.

underlying issues. This understanding gives the patient a stronger network of support during and after treatment. He/she is more likely to remain engaged in the recovery process, utilize healthier and broader methods of coping when faced with stressors, and successfully return to employment, school or parenting. Research also has found that family involvement has long-term benefits for the patient and family, such as sustained recovery, increased marital satisfaction and even family and job stability.

One of the most common problems seen in families with addicted loved ones is codependency, a complex relationship between the individual and a family member, or in some cases a friend, that appears to be loving, but is actually dangerous and damaging to all involved. Codependency is a habitual pattern of self-defeating coping mechanisms. Typically, the codependent offers help to the loved one, but it is too much help and is often inappropriate.

The addicted person learns to depend on the codependent to help “fix” his or her problems and what begins as a kind gesture, becomes an enabling mechanism for the addiction. Because the codependent protects the addicted person from the negative consequences of the addiction, the loved one can continue drinking or using. While the codependency is a dysfunctional behavior that family members adopt in order to survive the emotional pain and stress caused by the addiction, in the long run it can be counterproductive and detrimental to an addicted loved ones recovery process. Both parties involved, the loved one and the codependent family member, should be involved in therapy to understand how to form a healthier relationship. Helping a family member engage in a comprehensive addiction treatment program is never a codependent action, however.

At times, families separate from their loved ones as the physical, emotional and financial stress of the addiction becomes overwhelming. But, it is important to remember that individuals who have encountered such family dynamics are not without support resources. There are a variety of sober support systems that addicts can utilize, including but not limited to community groups (e.g., 12-step programs, Recovery Inc., Families Anonymous, etc.), religious and spiritual programs, and even online e-lessons (www.enterhealth.com) and recovery blogs. An individual’s family support system does not have to be blood-related relatives, or even the individuals he or she live with. Whether it is a parent, significant other, children, close friend, coworker or a sober support group, the ability to build a solid system of recovery resources is essential to an individual’s ability to sustain his or her life without alcohol or drugs.

Comprehensive Approach There are many types of alcoholism and addiction, and various stages to each type so it’s no wonder that the traditional treatment methods do not work for everyone. Addiction is definitely not a “one treatment fits all” disease. Research shows that the 70 percent of the people who are in a constant cycle of treatment-recovery-relapse-treatment-recovery-relapse need a 90-day residential stay, followed by months of comprehensive outpatient programs, behavioral therapies and social support in order to

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have the optimal chance for lasting recovery. Depending on how severe a person’s brain has been injured by addiction, it can take 45 to 90 days or more for the brain’s chemistry to start to “reboot.” After that, it takes 4 to 12 months for an alcoholic brain to heal and get back to normal and often longer for someone with an addiction to stimulants or other drug classes. People sometimes want to avoid residential treatment because it’s disruptive to their family, their job and their life. But someone suffering from addiction needs some amount of disruption in order to break the harmful patterns that they have created.

A comprehensive approach to alcohol and drug addiction treatment (defined by the National Institute of Health) incorporates treatments for many different components of a patient’s life including: psychiatric care, anti-addiction medication, wellness/nutrition programs, family therapy, stress management, skill building, individual and group psychoeducational components and therapy, spirituality and 12-step fellowships. It takes all of these components individualized to a specific patient’s life experience, to be able to approach that 90 percent long term sobriety success rate.

When an individual completes one phase of treatment, they do not walk out completely sober and free of the challenges that they once had. Their brain is still injured by addiction. The triggers, people and places that led to their addictions are still there, the same as before they entered treatment.

The only difference is that the individual now has the tools and information to defeat or manage those influences. Historically, the leading cause of relapse is failure to follow a prescribed, on-going addiction treatment plan.

To reduce the risk of relapse, it is important that individuals have a lifelong care plan (Life Care) that provides consistent touch points to support positive future recovery. Individuals in recovery should participate in Life Care counseling and focus on sober friends, using people for support when experiencing negative feelings and avoiding people, places and activities that were strongly associated with their addiction. They should also continue and adjust any medications and therapies started in their initial treatment phase.

By using proven, evidence-based treatment methods and medications to address the psychological, relational and spiritual aspects of addiction, individuals and family members will give their loved one hope and a high chance of success. As an industry, it is time that we move beyond traditional approaches that have struggled for the past 70 years and show that we now have the tools and techniques to improve outcomes and achieve what we all set out to do – which is to help others successfully manage the disease of addiction throughout their life.

Dr. Urschel, a board-certified addiction psychiatrist, is chief medical strategist of Enterhealth, LLC, which is an addiction disease management company based in Dallas TX. He is the author of the New York Times best seller, Healing the Addicted Brain. For more information, please visit www.enterhealth.com.

FOR PEOPLE WHO CAN’T STAND SELF INDULGENCE IN OTHERS, BUT OFTEN FORGIVE IT IN THEMSELVES.

By Charles Rubin

You’ll be screamed at, cursed at, and barked at. It’s a classic scenario.

You’ll be blamed and judged. The entitled party will tell you he or she didn’t want to be born into this lousy world in the first place, that it was all your idea.

Their nub of their message is that now you can damn well pay up and shut up! And something inside you agrees. But don’t give into it.

It is said in certain spiritual circles, that we choose our parents before we incarnate, and I can believe that, especially in regards to my youngest son.

There he was, pre-born, way up there in the heavens, scanning the planet for just the right parent who would do everything for him, who would be like supple clay that he could mold.

Seeing me, he no doubt made a nosedive straight toward earth, yelling “HELLO SUCKERRRRRR” all the way down.

Then it all changed. I suddenly became a recovering parent. I let go of all that cloying, sickly, namby-pamby destructive crap in favor of doing something I hadn’t done in years: Live my own life.

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It wasn’t easy–in fact, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life, and there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about the people I love most in the world–the ones I had to let go of.

But I knew that if I ever wanted to experience peace, love, happiness, and joy, I had to do it.

After all, I figured, I am entitled Charles Rubin is the author of the international best-seller: Don’t Let Your Kids Kill You: A Guide for Parents of Drug and alcohol addicted Children.

This book, written by the author to save his own life, has now helped thousands of parents do the same. Rubin, who is a regular media guest, lives in Sonoma County, CA. He’s working on a follow up to Don’t Let Your Kids Kill You. He also counsels parents--visit him on Facebook (Charles Rubin author).

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P.O. Box 880175 Boca Raton, Florida 33488-0175 www.thesoberworld.com

The contents of this book may not be reproduced either in whole or in part without consent of publisher. Every effort has been made to include accurate data, however the publisher cannot be held liable for material content or errors. This publication offers Therapeutic Services, Drug & Alcohol Rehabilitative services, and other related support systems. You should not rely on the information as a substitute for, nor does it replace professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have any concerns or questions about your health, you should always consult with a physician or other health-care professional. Do not disregard, avoid or delay obtaining medical or health related advice from your health care professional because of something you may have read in this publication. The Sober World LLC and its publisher do not recommend nor endorse any advertisers in this magazine and accepts no responsibility for services advertised herein. Content published herein is submitted by advertisers with the sole purpose to aid and educate families that are faced with drug/alcohol and other addiction issues and to help families make informed decisions about preserving quality of life.

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