Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects. - Arnold H. Glasow -
Laughter is the best medicine for a long and happy life. He who laughs —lasts! - Wilford A. Peterson -
The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter. The moment it arises, all your irritations and resentments slip away, and the sunny spirit takes their place. - M ark twain -
Laughter is an Instant Vacation
3 Reasons to Laugh more!
Laughter is an
Instant Vacation www.simpletruths.com
Humorous Quotes On Life
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Copyright © 2008 Simple Truths, LLC Published by Simple Truths, LLC 1952 McDowell Road Naperville, Illinois 60563 All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form by any means — except for brief quotations in printed reviews — without the prior written permission of the publisher. Design: Lynn Harker, Simple Truths, Illinois Photo credits: Getty Images, Masterfile, Corbis and Photolibrary ISBN 978-1-60810-003-3 Printed and bound in the United States of America. Simple Truths is a registered trademark. 800-900-3427 www.simpletruths.com 01 WOZ 08
Laughter is an
Instant Vacation Humorous Quotes On Life
Introduction I
love this book! Laughter is one of the simple joys of life. Therefore, I thought it made a lot of sense for Simple Truths to publish a book that’s guaranteed to make you laugh. So I challenged some members of our team to look for their favorite humorous quotes on life. And I’m pleased to say they definitely rose to the occasion. Laughter is to the soul what soap is to the body. It is sunshine in any life, and as our title indicates… it is an “instant vacation!” So sit back and enjoy an unexpected getaway with a shot of inspiration! Live with Passion,
Mac Anderson Founder, Simple Truths
My sincere thanks to those individuals who contributed a lot of great quotes for Laughter Is An Instant Vacation: DEBBIE BASKIN
BOB KELLY
DARCI BERTONCELLO
Bryce Lofchie
JULIE DUMLER
Michele Lofchie
DAN GREEN
JOELL LOUTSIS
LYNN HARKER
SALLY REEVES
KIRK HUMPHREY
LANCE VANDERHAGEN
TROY JOHNSON
JOE VANEK
TINA KALTENECKER
KRISTI WHITFIELD
JULIE KELLOGG
KEVIN ZAHRTE Denotes our Top 5 contributors!
Humorous Quotes On Life
I was in a beauty contest once.
I not only came in last, I was hit in the mouth by Miss Congeniality. ~ Phyllis Diller ~
•7•
The best way to keep children home is to make the home a pleasant atmosphere … and let the air out of the tires. ~ Dorothy Parker ~
•
8
•
Laughter… is an Instant Vacation
W
hen you don’t know
what you’re talking about, it’s hard to know when you’re finished. ~ Tommy Smothers ~
Camping is nature’s way of promoting the motel business. ~ Dave Barry ~
•
9
•
Humorous Quotes On Life
So far on my 30-day diet, I lost 18 days. ~ Terry McEntire ~
• 10 •
T
he trouble with eating Italian food is
that five or six days later, you’re hungry again. ~ George Miller ~
When I was kidnapped,
my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room. ~ Woody Allen ~
• 12 •
Laughter… is an Instant Vacation
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say, “Because it’s such a beautiful animal.” There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. ~ Ellen DeGeneres ~
• 13 •
Humorous Quotes On Life
A
dults are always asking little kids what
they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas. ~ Paula Poundstone ~
• 15 •
I buy expensive suits.
They just look cheap on me. ~ Warren Buffett ~
I am not afraid of death, I just don’t want to be there when it happens. ~ Woody Allen ~
• 16 •
Laughter… is an Instant Vacation
P
olitics is supposed to be the second
oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. ~ R onald Reagan ~
• 17 •
Humorous Quotes On Life
A filing cabinet is a place where
you can lose things systematically. ~ T.H. Thompson ~
• 18 •
I
went to a bookstore and
asked the saleswoman,
“Where’s the self-help section?” She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. ~ George Carlin ~
• 20 •
Weho pet ha ty o ue nj o y e d r e a di ngt hi sf r e eo nl i nepr e v i e w. Y o uc a npur c ha s et he c o mpl e t eb o o ka ta nyt i me b yv i s i t i ngusa t : www. s i mpl e t r ut hs . c o m
Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects. - Arnold H. Glasow -
Laughter is the best medicine for a long and happy life. He who laughs —lasts! - Wilford A. Peterson -
The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter. The moment it arises, all your irritations and resentments slip away, and the sunny spirit takes their place. - M ark twain -
Laughter is an Instant Vacation
3 Reasons to Laugh more!
Laughter is an
Instant Vacation www.simpletruths.com
Humorous Quotes On Life