MEET THE RIVARD FAMILY

SAM, MEGHAN, ANNA & MICAH

BY LISA DEFILIPPO; PHOTOS BY 21VINES PHOTOGRAPHY

Meet the Rivard family: Sam, Meghan, Anna, 9, Micah, 7, and their canine companion, Neno, of Westfield, IN. Sam is an IT Project Manager for the City of Westfield; Meghan is an instructional assistant for Westfield Washington Schools, where Anna is in third grade, and Micah attends full-time ABA therapy.

They enjoy family dinners, board game nights, church life, Great Wolf Lodge (their family fave) and exploring local nature preserves and playgrounds. As it is for many special needs families, especially active families like the Rivards, Meghan says they’ve had to endure their share of looks and comments over the years — some because Micah has nonverbal autism, some because Anna is Taiwanese and Micah is Chinese; theirs is a story of adoption.

“We are a multi-racial family, as well as a special needs family, so we do get looks and sometimes comments when we are all out together,” said Meghan. “I’ve learned many people aren’t educated about autism or adoption, so we try to use those opportunities as teaching opportunities if possible.

“I wish I would have fully realized what I do now,” she reflects. “That it’s OK for your family not to fit in the ‘typical’ box.”

ADOPTION

Ever since Meghan can remember, she has wanted adoption to be a part of her story, and the deal was sealed when she met her husband, Sam.

“When we were dating, Sam and I both often spoke about adoption and how much we both admired it,” said Meghan. “We adopted our daughter through domestic adoption in 2013 and Micah through international adoption in 2018.”

Anna is Taiwanese and was born in the U.S.; the Rivards have an open adoption with Anna’s birth parents, with occasional visits and phone calls, whereas Micah’s adoption was very different. As it is in many international adoptions, Meghan explained, they were given very little information on Micah, and zero information on his biological family, only that he had spent his first three years of life in an orphanage and a hospital in Shanghai, China.

“We knew he had a heart condition and had heart surgery as a baby,” said Meghan. “But we were not aware of any other characteristics that might lead to an autism diagnosis.”

Meghan, Sam and Anna all traveled to China in 2018 and met Micah in the orphanage, and it’s a moment none of them will ever forget. “I’ll always remember them carrying him into the room and handing him to me,” said Mom. “I absolutely love sharing about adoption. But I’m going to be honest, it’s a long and hard process; it’s a rollercoaster of emotions, but so worth it.”

The family soon learned that Micah had other challenges besides his heart condition. “Micah was 3 years old, and he could not walk and still ate from a bottle,” said Meghan. “He also was not using any words for communication. Communication initially was pointing at items and getting very frustrated when we didn’t know what he wanted or needed. He was also fixated on swinging toys and wouldn’t give much eye contact.” This was when the family started to suspect Micah may have autism.

Shortly after they arrived home, Meghan and Sam put Micah in feeding and speech therapies, and a year later, he was officially diagnosed with nonverbal autism.

“When we were going through the diagnosis process, it can be overwhelming and, honestly, discouraging,” said Meghan. “But someone told me that getting a diagnosis for your child is just a word. It doesn’t change who they are.”

AUTISM

With help from Medicaid and the Medicaid waiver, Micah receives full-time applied behavior analysis therapy, or ABA, in-center, where he receives occupational and speech therapies each week as well. Meghan said it had been almost two years since his team introduced an augmentative and alternative communication (AAC) device to Micah so he could communicate. AAC devices are handheld tablets (typically an iPad) programmed with a particular language software, allowing the child to pick the written word or picture, and the word is spoken aloud.

“It’s definitely another moment I won’t forget,” said Meghan. “It’s been great seeing him learn and being able to tell us what he wants or needs. While there are definitely still frustrations, having a way to communicate with us has been so helpful. His AAC device has opened so many doors for him to share and communicate what he wants, which has allowed his frustration to get much lower.

“While it’s hard not to at times, I don’t want to compare him to any other 7-year-old and think he should or shouldn’t be doing something,” said Mom. Thankfully, one less worry for Sam and Meghan is Micah’s heart.

“Since being home, Micah is followed by specialists from Riley Children’s Hospital cardiology,” said Meghan. “He is thriving and is expected to have the same experiences as his peers. We cannot thank Riley cardiology enough for their fantastic care.

“Micah has come so far since the day we met him in China. He has overcome so much since that time as well. I love the eye contact he always gives when communicating with us. I love how affectionate and goofy he is at times. I love how he is starting to follow Anna and wanting to do what she is doing.

“Micah likes to be a ‘typical little brother’ and tease Anna to get her attention, and she is extremely patient with him,” gushed Mom. “ There are times that Anna wishes he could play differently with her, but she is a great teacher and friend to him.”

As for what the future holds, Meghan has the same goals as any mother does. “I want my children to be happy and healthy. I want them to be as independent as possible, whatever that might look like for both of them. I want them both to know they are loved, and we will advocate and do anything we can for them.” To good to leave out quotes/fun facts " The biggest suggestion I would have for someone considering adoption is to be open," said Meghan “Be open to a lot of paperwork to fill out. Be open to something taking longer than expected. But also be open to falling in love when you get the first pictures and information about a child’s profile. Be open to opening your heart.”

Sam and Meghan met online through eharmony. com. “I know some people find it strange,” laughed Meghan,” but we met online while we lived in Indiana and Ohio. We talked on the phone for a while, then dated distantly for two years before getting married.”

“We really enjoy this magazine,” said Meghan,” and are very thankful for this opportunity to share our story.”

Sam enjoys the Indianapolis Colts, and Meghan enjoys watching the Ohio State Buckeyes.

Sam and Meghan look forward to their rare date nights, thanks to Waiver-supported respite services.

The family enjoys watching Disney movies together. Micah’s favorite movie is Up ; Anna’s is Home Alone ; Mom’s is White Christmas ; and Dad’s is Oceans 11

The whole family loves eating out at Mexican restaurants and all things Italian. Micah’s fave spot is the Old Spaghetti Factory.

The Rivard family enjoys attending their church, where they are blessed to have a special needs children’s ministry. “There are only a couple of churches in the area with a ministry, which is sad to me,” said Meghan. “It is missing out on so many families being able to attend church. Micah would not be able to go into a typical Sunday school room, so having this ministry allows us to go to church. They also plan and offer different family events, such as respite nights, which are such a blessing.”