From Disorder By Erin Costello
1|Costello
To watch the virus opening: collage of syrah gore, connected flowers or steak knives. To walk is to host now.
2|Costello
A1C I was never that tired, but she slept on the way to the grocery store, in the backseat, near the car seat. It was raining through her. In 1990 diabetes was rare, it had been treated with pig insulin. Mary practiced injections, or being stared at, on a doll. Our bio-hazard bathrooms, her arms rubbed with alcohol, syringes and her first boyfriend. A low is faster. I read somewhere that dogs can smell a high blood sugar, or a low one. I never saw the sugar veins but I know their speed. Mary was ten years old in a hospital playing game boy. Gray game boy. The sound-an easy score. So many numbers to quantify blood, I saw that blood. Small drops from her finger on a cotton ball. Mary looked yellow in her school picture, the diabetic hospital blanket, fluorescence of the hallway. One cure is cake frosting massaged down the child’s throat.
3|Costello
Promise, the half and half is white replicate the flesh, in the manner of short time prayer in imminent worry.
4|Costello
Trust Walk What he didn't see was the lattice walls, a trellis town of pie crusts. Uneven pavement dangers. The cars got closer, he got closer, estimating steps from memory, I was spun around, stopped when I thought there was a sign. There was no sign. Trust couldn't stop my head from looking down. My hands hot in my pockets, night and snow on my wrists. Sometimes I felt his arm around my waist. I see, I communicate. I see, I communicate. All words gone except see, trellis, lattice, see.
5|Costello
His calligraphy of brain waves the sconce, the trough, the wall diagramming burden - success amnesia like wicker.
6|Costello
Auto-Immune Mist, ragged and sticking to straw -through it companions came or they were voices women or grass up as buoys are up.
7|Costello
Organize Eat no meat, no medicine shake bacteria pills, patterns of decision wounded, wounded wood. I sign as my name as donor I, a small pink circle that kidney.
8|Costello
An emergency emerges a black marker for paint. It says lift this bar, inject. Exit, two sticks crossing.
9|Costello
How Hope Works Boot heel to the ground I combine with it separate it - the empty lines - form the dullness I coil a scarf to keep off the cold mixing and straining the weather. Boot toe to the ground spin it left right left. Two boys put money in a meter, no space opens up.
10 | C o s t e l l o