HOLDEN’S HAIRDRYER 30-31 MEDIA DIARIES

H O L D E N ’ S

HAI DRYER TREATMENT

In this feature, we get an insight into the Gate changing room as Luke Holden gives an alternative view on his team mates. Please note, these are purely the views of Luke Holden and not the media team…

A relatively new addition to the squad, surely not had enough time to introduce himself just yet?

Nothing yet from Penny. He’s like a mouse. Expected better to be honest, it’s a bit like trying to get blood from a stone trying to get any banter out of him.

Having spent a few years with Westy, surely you’ve got a few stories about him in the dressing room?

Not sure on Nathan. He acts tough on the pitch but I reckon he’s got a soppy side that we’re yet to see. Dan Smith was telling me he fancies himself as the clubs hard man. And he wears stone island wherever he goes so based on that I’d have to say it’s probably Dan!

Luke! A chance to do the lads dirty for something embarrassing they do in the changing room, or for something they’ve done on the pitch! You are live in the Squires Gate programme, please do not swear! Starting off with the shot stopper, Nathan Pennington!

He does a good job of boosting our strikers’ confidence in training though. In small nets too!

Quite a few recognisable defenders still here from last season. Isaac, Nathan, Alex, Westy, as well as the additions of James Hughes and Dan Smith. Is Nathan the clubs hardman?

Funnily enough I don’t actually have much on Westy. Wish I did. He’s the ultimate professional I’m afraid.

There’s been a few additions to the midfield. We know Webby has played with you for a few years, previously at Ashton Athletic too. Webby has been voted quite a few times in our 60 seconds feature to be the winner of Love Island if him and his Mrs were to go on. A clear winner? Ry Riley and Dan Gray also have played with you for a few years now so again, surely some stories from them two?

yet to walk the walk yet though. Always goes out with sunglasses on for some reason, something about confidence issues with the ladies he said to me

I reckon Webby and Mel would be a great shout for the win. They’re like a comedy sketch them two. And now Mel is a viral TikTok superstar for an incident with an oyster they’ve got the upper hand before it’s even begun. As for Ry, I’ve never seen anyone so keen to buy a round. Can’t go on a night out with him without him getting his wallet out, flick through about £2000 worth of notes and then get the “baby Guinness” shots in. They must be like pints to Ry as well. Fair play. Don’t get me started on Dan Gray. Only lad I’ve ever known to go on a night out, get a pizza at half 9 and be home and tucked up in bed by 10pm because the Mrs had been on his case.

Rowan, Theo, Sam, and Prince are all relatively new too but going off our 60 seconds feature, Theo’s banter has got some stick?

Yes all good lads the 4 of them. You only need to have one conversation with Theo and you have your answer. Talks the talk,

And for the strikers. Nathan, Olly, Gal and Boydy. Olly and his incorrect punchline also got a few laughs we heard? As for Boydy, and Gal, they both go under the radar but we trust you to be able to give us some insight into what the changing room is really like?

I did see that Nathan answered his all time 5 a side team with only 4 players so he’s not covering himself in glory. Olly has got a bit about him. His initiation up there with one of the best I’ve seen. Not sure on his jokes though. Maybe he’ll have to tell me a few more. Boydy I can’t say a bad word about. Too much respect. What I can do with a football, James Boyd can do with an orange, and even whilst wearing those horrendous Crocs that he thinks are cool. Gal is great member of the dressing room. You really have to commend him because he is an older head in what is a young squad and the commitment levels to be down with the kids by wearing a headband every week is tremendous. We have a really good dressing room this year. I can’t wait to get back in amongst it. I have to say we would love to have more time having a bit of banter in the changing rooms but the majority of the time we are listening to the gaffer and watching his slideshows. Or listening to Andy shout whilst his teeth fall out hand on heart that actually happened!

And what about the back room staff, Rhys and Robbo? Any stories in them two?

Rhys is a nightmare on a night out. He’s hammered after about 10 mins and then can’t get in anywhere. The bouncers always turn him away no matter how many times he tells them he used to be at Man United as a kid or that he was the youngest professional physio in the football league. They’re having none of it. Robbo never leaves his side though. Always backs him up. Fair play to him. A Prison Break reference here but you’d be a brave man to try and take over Rhys’ pocket lining off Robbo. He has that on lockdown.