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intro And Contents

Updown: Does the carpet match the drapes? E-man: Umm, no, I don’t think so. Maybe a little bit... Next question! Fuck! Wanna hear the next question? Sure you do. This is journalism at its best! Go to updownmag.com to see the entire interview and footage of how E-man ended up on the cover covered in blood. We didn’t stop at E-man. Almost every story in this issue is backed with supporting online content. Anytime you see the ‘mag-to-web’ icon (bottom left) in a story, just go to updownmag.com and click on the ‘mag-to-web’ icon to see supporting video, interviews, photos and more. Enjoy issue 13.

16 Masthead 20-28 Louie Paradis: Six Hours In Beirut 31-40 Niall McClelland: H1N1 vs. Black Death 42-44 8 Mile: Brain Busting 46-52 Colin Adair: Powder & Prostitutes 54-59 No Age: The 12-Inch Pianist 60-69 Larry: Not LNP 70 Jesse Fox: Dance Hall Days 72-81 Nate Bozung: Malaka 82 Andrew Hardingham: Blacklist

mag-to-web icon

86 Now Go To updownmag.com

rider: E-man photo: Ashley barker

MASTHEAD

Publisher/Editor/Marketing Dan Lennox

Cover E-man Anderson by Sean Johnson

Design Direction/Editor /Web Editor George Russell

Send love/hate to info@updownmagazine.com

Editor Karl Fuhre Web Designer Paulo Kaladeen Copy Editor Sam Solomon Staff Writers John Mitchell, Jen Bond Conspirators Dylan Buijk, Grego & Andrew Florio, Norm (The King of Barrie) Contributing Writers Lance Hakker, Louie Paradis, Matty Ryan, David Brocklebank, Andrew Hardingham, Contributing Photographers Scott Wade, Ashley Barker, Sean Johnson, Colin Adair, Charles Kang, Andrew Hardingham, Ken Adams, Bob Plumb, Robbie Sell, Alex Paradis, Jeremy R. Jansen, Paavo Tikkanen Contributing Illustrators TJ Schneider, Smolik

Editorial Submissions or Advertising Contact 323 Maple St, Collingwood, ON, L9Y 2R3, Canada, info@updownmagazine.com, 705-444-7223 That Info Updown Magazine is published two times a year by Georgian Amp Media Inc. The views expressed are those of the contributors and not necessarily those of Georgian Amp Media Inc. or Updown magazine. Reproduction without permission is prohibited.

Louie paradis: six hours in beirut words: louie paradis

You know how sometimes it feels like your life is unreal somehow, like you’re in a movie? Well, that can be great when the movie is something like “Weekend at Bernie’s” but it’s a whole other story when you start to feel like the plot line involves a hostage taking and execution at the hands of a foreign government. And that’s kind of what Louie’s trip to Lebanon was like last year. Here he recounts the story for Updown. I was there to work on a feature story for Transworld Snowboarding, with Jarad Hadi, Nick Dirks, Java Fernandez and Liam Gallagher. Jarad, Java, Nick and I were flying from Munich to Beirut to meet with Jarad’s relatives, and we had to wait for Liam who was getting there late the next day, so the plan was to hang in Beirut for one day and then go up to the mountains. We arrived late so we decided to go to bed and check the city out in the morning. When we woke up, breakfast was on the table and Karam, our guide, was ready to drive us around. We quickly ate and jumped in his nice little Audi. As soon as he started driving we realized that driving etiquette was very different here: road signs were only suggestions and a heavy foot was the norm. Being a passenger

was intense. Even just blinking was a nerve-wracking experience because I wasn’t sure if we’d still be on the road when I opened my eyes. Anyway, so after an hour of driving around, Karam offered to take us to the sketchy part of town, the zone that was bombed a couple of years ago. We were all down so he decided to head straight there. Right before we got to the zone he said something like, “Here’s what we call the safe square – nothing can happen here,” so we asked him if we could get out of the car and stretch our legs for a second. He parked in front of a little shop. I started stretching, Java started snapping pictures, Jarad and Nick searched for their cameras in the trunk and started snapping too. After a minute, a guy whom we figured was the owner of the shop came out and started speaking in Arabic with Karam. They looked like they were arguing about the parking so we weren’t really paying attention. Eventually the guy told us to stop taking pictures and, around the same moment, a bullet-proof black BMW with tinted windows parked right behind us. A couple of guys got out of the car. They walked over to Karam and, after he and the other guy shared a few words, Karam was sent over to collect the cameras and hand them over. We began to wonder

This page: rider: Louie Paradis, PHOTO: ashley barker next page: rider: louie paradis, PHOTO: alex paradis

what was going on but Karam seemed super relaxed so we figured it was cool. We were eventually told to get in the car and wait as they completed their security check and, once that was finished, they’d guide us around the zone. Ten minutes later, Karam – got in the car and started following the Beemer. They still had our cameras. The drive was very short – just three blocks – and we stopped in a little alley. There were way more people here. A bunch of guys passed the cameras around. We were told to stay in the car so we just observed what was unfolding outside. Some of the men had guns. At this point we realized that we may have put ourselves in a shitty situation. Eventually, Karam, who seemed to have been talking with the man in charge, opened the door and said, “Come meet the family, guys!” We all got out of the car and tried to shake hands with them. It didn’t work. Only one shook my hand and he didn’t seem to understand why I wanted to shake his hand. They then searched us for weapons and brought us into a garage with a large puddle in the center. We crossed it and entered a second building. The door was made of heavy metal. The hallway was really tight and the walls seemed to have been recently finished. We were then asked to empty our pockets and take off our shoes. I handed over my passport, my wallet, my inhaler. We were brought into an empty white room, with a couple of chairs, a desk and bars on the windows. It was now just us four Americans. Karam was in another room. We started tripping. We shared a few different scenarios: being kidnapped for money, for political leverage – anything, really. But at the same time, we tried to make light of the situation. At one point Java was like, “Why don’t we think about what we’re gonna do when we get out of here?” to which Nick replied, “Nah, man. Why don’t we think about the past 22 years?” Honestly, we were thinking that we were gonna die, or be tortured, or be held for a long time. Then a guy came in,

sat in front of us and began grilling us: name, date of birth, address, job, name of parents, brothers, sisters, etc. The guy left, locked the door again. Another guy came back in and questioned us further: what are we doing here, where were we before we got here, etc. Left again. I think they came one or two more times. Then they gave us our shoes back and told us to go stand against the wall in the garage. That was for sure one of the scariest moments because we were all sure they would shoot us. But then we were told to get back into Karam’s car, except now a random guy was driving. Karam still wasn’t with us. When we asked the guy where we were going, he said we were going to get coffee. We didn’t really understand what he meant until we arrived at a family restaurant that appeared to be theirs. They sat us at a table in a hidden part of the patio and began to film us with a digi-camera. After a few minutes, they started interrogating us individually and made the others remain silent: how long have you known your friends for, why did you come to Lebanon, etc. Soon after they finished interrogating the three of us, Karam arrived and they casually released us from their custody. They gave us everything back: passports, wallets, cameras. The whole process took around six hours. Those were for sure the scariest six hours of my life. But at the same time, looking back, I was being a pussy ’cause those guys were actually being pretty nice, offering us drinks and shit – not even a hint of violence! They were just doing their job: protecting their country the way they have to. The rest of the trip was amazing. Snowboarding was fun. Food was crazy good. The whole experience was unforgettable.

previous page: rider: louie paradis, PHOTO: alex paradis This page: rider: Louie Paradis, PHOTO: ashley barker

photo

Niall McClelland: h1n1 vs. black death words: john mitchell, photo: jeremy r. jansen

Toronto-based artist Niall McClelland has been creating darkly absurdist designs for heavy hitters like Burton, Rome and Lifetime for the better part of this aging decade. As he split time growing up between Ireland and Canada, Niall was fascinated by the general lunacy of the world – an interest that has led to a body of work that is both macabre and subversively paranoid. Niall uses his passion for history to recognize the difference between our comfy lives in the present and the grim nature of the past (think: worrying about swine flu vs. worrying about the Black Death) but manages to find enough humour in that

discrepancy to keep his work from taking itself too seriously. Niall has managed to strike some strong alliances within the industry – most notably with Lifetime – that have led to an unencumbered creative environment that is perfect for an artist who works in underutilized methods like photocopy, graphite and collage. Niall toes the line between being a gallery presence and a commercial success and is currently working on a worldwide campaign for Jack Daniel’s. Asked whether there are any blank canvases he’s yet to work on, he replied coolly, “Maybe an airplane.”

‘CREEPIN’ by niall Mcclelland

‘Clueless’; by niall Mcclelland

‘COLLAGE FOR STUSSY’ by niall Mcclelland

‘two thousand seven’ by niall Mcclelland

PREVIOUS PAGE: ‘COLLAGE FOR MANIK SKATEBOARDS’ THIS PAGE: ‘EUSACHIAN’ by niall Mcclelland

‘COMPASS’ by niall Mcclelland

‘THE AMATEUR SCIENTIST’ by niall Mcclelland

KYLE LEEPERBACK LIP

OLIVER BARTON PHOTOS

etniesskate.com timebombtrading.com stickers@timebomb.bc.ca

8 MILE: BRAIN BUSTING words: KARL FUHRE, photo: paavo tikkanen

The lifers over at 8 Mile are funny dudes who have their fingers on the pulse of what’s what. So of course we had to get a couple of them – Jbone and Mikey Rencz – to comment on some of the world’s most pressing issues. Jbone (Johnny Lyall) Bozewreck: Terrible snowboarders but hilarious dudes. Tuna: is best fresh. Steve Brule: is the doctor I trust the most. Doogie Howser: is the doctor I trust the least. Hippies: have it all figured out. Pizza Pops: burn my mouth after I put them in the micro for too long. Kale: is the most unique person I’ve ever met. I love hanging with him when he’s awake. Ninjas: are pussies. Ping-Pong: is for real men. Gypsies: shrunk our friend “Alex” Auchu! Urban shreding: is not something we care for too much these days. Speaking of urban, my friend’s mom said “herb and garlic cream cheese” the other day and my buddy said, “What’s urban cream cheese?” Ha ha! I thought it was hilarious. Partysnake: bites me really hard often. 4 a.m.: is the time I usually end up at Tsui Hang Village eating BBQ duck. Boobs: come in all shapes and sizes. Dream catchers: are hanging all over Browner’s house, truck, neck, etc. Acid: I haven’t had the pleasure yet. Beer: Coors Light. Chicken Wings: are one of my faves. Cigs: on the reg. Hozers: on the reg. Whistler: on the reg. Bob & Doug: Yasinski are the biggest jerks I know. “That’s what she said”: is a great line to use after some dude says something like “Oh, and it was huge!” E-Man: jibs it. Squamish: lives it! Colin Adair: has a beard and wears it well. LNP: looks like he dresses himself out of a costume box all the time. Ghosts: are pretty spooky, I guess. Love: is definitely in the air. 8 Mile: was a total mess. Now it’s just a website. Scarves: are for homos. Charles White: has a cute voice. Rencz: is a funny redhead. Eero: has a big wang. Jbone: dresses like city bones whenever he gets outta the boonies. 22cm: is the size of Eero’s ween. Blogs: are the only things I read these days. Fuck books!

Mikey Rencz Bozewreck: Bozung is a homie. He likes to float around like a gypsy. Tuna: I like tuna. It’s delicious. Steve Brule: Fucking love Steve! Probably my fave thing I have seen on YouTube. He has the best outlook on everything! Doogie Howser: Worst doctor ever. Hippies: I am half hippie. Pizza Pops: Pretty good. Sometimes burn your mouth. Kale: Amazing. Lucky to know him. He knows the most random people ever. Ninjas: Tadashi the ninja. He rules. Ping-Pong: Forrest Gump is good at this. Gypsies: Great. Eero hates gypsies ‘cause they have a different kind of gypsy in Finland than we have here. Urban boarding: I like the pow, bruh. Partysnake: I like the one guy who wears socks with his flip-flops. 4 a.m.: Food tastes better then. Dudes who dress like 16-year-old girls: It’s funny, but whatever. Not gonna hate. Browner has this look going pretty good right now. Dreamcatchers: Had some when I was a kid. Acid: Dickie and Chucky can tell you about this one. Beer: Coors Light! First official 8 Mile sponsor! Chicken Wings: Love them. All flavours. Hozers: Great word. Very Canadian. Whistler: Embarrassing now with that stupid fuckin’ MTV show. Bob & Doug: Great, great hozers and all the good stuff. K-Man and Devun did a good one for the Wildcats teaser. Summer rental: Ask Bones! Weekend at Bernie’s: That would be a wicked Halloween costume. “That’s what she said”: My fave joke ever. Girls hate this joke the most. E-Man: Ginger. Squamish: Great! I am lovin’ Squampton. Colin Adair: Good dude. Super old. 8 Mile: 8milelife for life! Ha ha. Scarves: Jesse Fox. Charles White: Great voice, great dude. I’ve known him since we were really young. He’s a free bird. Eero: The junior world halfpipe champ! That’s when I first saw him. He was wearing a hockey helmet, and goggles over his nose. Jbone: Met him in Whis a long time ago. That guy has his shit together! Ha ha! 22cm: Eero’s measuring system. Blogs: Fuck off. I’m blogging, bro...

AUDIO

COLIN ADAIR: POWDER AND PROSTITUTES words: COLIN ADAIR

Colin Adair is recognized worldwide as one of the best middle-aged, bearded snowboard photographers – except in the country formerly known as Zargovia, where he is hated and would be stoned to death if ever caught within its borders. Seriously, though, his photos have landed on the cover of pretty much every major snowboard magazine and he shoots daily with shred heavies like Devun Walsh, Iikka Backstrom and Lauri Heiskari just to name a few. Colin explains what he claims to be the “true” story of how he got to where he is today and he’s picked out some photos for your viewing pleasure. UD: When did you first become interested in photography? Colin: As a young boy growing up in Eastern Europe, I was given my grandfather’s camera that he used during the war after his sudden death from potato poisoning. I would roam the streets late at night after I snuck out of my bedroom and climbed down the drain pipes. It was a very dangerous time and I learned how to move stealthily and became friends with the local prostitutes, who took me in as their own. I would later lose my virginity to the most beautiful of them when she felt it was time for me to become a man. These were different times, strange times. I honed my skills as a photographer, which was really a metaphor for me becoming a man. First published photo? I believe it was EEE magazine which stands for Eastern European Extreme. It was affectionately known as E3 mag or Triple E mag or simply Three Es mag, depending on what region you were from. There were a

lot of translation issues and many fights occurred because of this. You would be amazed at how one little letter in the wrong word can change the whole meaning and context of a sentence. Like I said, it was a strange time. What was your first gig? My first gig was shooting photos for the local prostitutes for their profile pages on the brothel website. I experimented a lot with different lighting techniques and styles. This is where I perfected my chiaroscurostyle lighting that I am now known for. Are you self-taught or did you get yourself some education? Completely self-taught. I would sneak over the border to Germany via Zargovia and Velonia (as they were formerly known) and smuggle illegal books disguised as a barber’s apprentice. When did you realize “holy shit, I’m a photographer”? At the age of nine when I had beautiful young women taking their clothes off in my studio. What’s your set-up? Mostly using my old Volstok camera I inherited from the grandfather and various expired film stocks I acquired when my country was in revolution and anarchy ruled the streets. Who’s your favorite person or thing to shoot? Anything, anywhere, anytime. As long as the light is perfect and I have a bottle of vodka. Otherwise I will not waste my precious film stock. Where do you see your career taking you, say, 20 years down the road? I will probably be dead. I expect that there will be many, many retrospectives of my long illustrious and overly perfect body of work.

previous page: ‘self portrait’ this page: rider: IIKKA BACKSTROM photos: colin adair

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this page & following page: band: no age, photos: charles kang

AUDIO

no age: the 12-inch pianist words: george russell

From the grimy depths of the avant-garde Los Angeles venue The Smell, noisepunk duo No Age have built a reputation not just for their piercing sound but also for their DIY approach to everything they do. After a few years of rocking in L.A. underground semi-obscurity, the success of their distortion-drenched 2008 album Nouns launched them onto the international stage. Updown recently had a chance to chat with guitarist Randy Randall about the band’s beginnings, their skateboarding heritage and the fine line between fucking and fighting. UD: If your 12-year-old self could see you now, what do you think he would say? Randy: I think he would call bullshit on it. I don’t think he would believe some of the things I’ve been able to do. If only that 12-year-old kid hanging on the edge of the stage watching Sonic Youth could see me just standing around talking with Thurston Moore.

Are you enjoying the hype at the moment? You can’t really believe your own hype or any kind of hype. I mean, it’s whatever people make of it. I am getting ready for the backlash. How did you and drummer Dean Spunt become No Age? We had a mutual friend we had known separately through going to punk shows and stuff here in Southern California and he said, “You should meet my other friend and we should all start a band.” So Dean and I met and we all started playing music together in a band called Wives. When Wives finally ran its course, Dean and I opted to try something different. We had a few other ideas. And that sort of led to musical questions: “What would happen if...” – that kind of thing. So we were curious enough to find the answers to those sorts of questions and that became No Age.

Dean has described your music as “Paul McCartney’s dick in a jar of mustard.” Are you guys still going with that? Yeah, that feels about right. It’s kind of this super-sweet stuff but completely doused in piss and shit and the worst things in the world. We could take something really beautiful and just run it through all the acidic brine and kind of bleach it. You always start somewhere. You start with beautiful stuff and just try to dirty it up as much as possible. We were just reading something in the van yesterday about this band from Virginia called Skywaves. Whoever it was described them as ‘distortion music’ and I like that because it says nothing, but I like the way it sounds. So that’s the new way I describe our music. Tell me about the genie and the 12-inch pianist. I fucked up this joke so many times. One thing I do on tour is try and collect jokes from people in different cities or countries or continents. Everybody has some dirty jokes they like to tell, so I try to remember them as much as I can. This one I always try to remember and I seem to screw it up every time I tell it. But it’s along the lines of… A guy goes into a bar and finds a lamp. Rubs the lamp and up pops a genie. The genie says I’ll grant you three wishes.

So the guy whispers to the genie and in walk a million ducks. So the guy goes, “Wait. I asked for a million bucks, not one million ducks.” And the genie says, “Oh, sorry. I have a hard time hearing. That’s my bad ear. Do the other ear.” So the guy whispers something again and up pops a 12-inch guy playing a piano. The guy goes, “What is this?” The genie says, “Didn’t you ask for a 12-inch pianist?” Something like that. I fucked it up. I also have another good one. So two guys are walking down the street and they see a dog licking his nuts. One guy turns to the other guy and says, “Damn, I wish I could do that,” and the other guy says, “We should probably pet him first.” How fine is the line between fighting and fucking? Well, we just finished playing a show at SXSW and I was talking to a friend as the security was clearing out the audience. I was taking a break just to wipe the sweat off my face and the security guard gets in my face and starts yelling, “Get the fuck out of here,” while poking my chest. He eventually gets toe to toe with me and I am like, “What the fuck man? Chill out! I just got done playing. Can you give me five fucking minutes?” We’re pretty much nose to nose and it occurred to me that this had become a very intimate moment with this

guy right close to me. It hits me that this guy is either gonna smash me in the face or I could totally just defuse this. It just felt weird and gay to have some big burly dude that close to my face. So instead of getting into a brawl and seeing who is bigger – which is also a very gay thing to do – instead of trying to fight, I leaned forward and kissed him. He immediately turned and walked away. I think I messed with his idea of masculinity, but to me it just seemed so fucked up. I’d rather try and kiss you than try and fight you. So it’s a fine line between fighting and fucking. This past year you hit up SXSW with Andrew Reynolds and The Goat, didn’t you? Yeah. We did a small tour out there with those guys where we would do a show one day, then skate the next. So it was show, skate, show, skate… How did you meet Andrew? Dean and I grew up skateboarding in Southern California and we were huge fans of Reynolds and stuff. So when we met Reynolds we became friends. And once they created Altamont they were trying to do some different stuff and really try to incorporate a music element. You know even the name is referencing the infamous Rolling Stones show at the Altamont Speedway where someone was killed. And Andrew really digs music and plays guitar with The Goat so I’ve just gotten to know him and talk about guitars, music and shit. Didn’t you do a short film for Altamont? Yeah. I hooked up with the Altamont team and headed over to France for a few weeks, shot a bunch of Super 8 and ended up with a 7-minute edit that was used as a promo. Are you still working on that documentary? What is it about? Yeah, yeah… It’s still ongoing. It’s really about all these different spaces [music venues] and about why I play in nontraditional venues like The Smell. There are a lot of places around the world that operate outside the mainstream venue culture. So the documentary is a way to showcase those spaces and talk about why they rule.

It focuses on all-ages venues? This is important because, for the most part, the whole venue experience is designated by your drinking age, which is really so abstract especially when you get the chance to travel. In some countries the drinking age is fourteen, and others it’s eighteen, and then in some countries it’s sixteen. So it’s really this abstract rule that people and government officials make up. If you’re 14 in this country you can go to shows, but if you’re 14 in this other country you can’t go. It just makes no sense at all. What if you don’t drink and want to go see a show? It doesn’t matter if you’re not at an age to drink. I got a chance to talk to Ian MacKaye from Minor Threat and Fugazi in the documentary and he has one of the most succinct quotes where he says, “Trying to see music in a bar is like trying to go to a poetry reading in a crack house.” There is no point in one or the other. Drinking a beer and watching a band are not joined at the hip. There are ways of seeing music without drinking a beer, and ways of drinking beer without seeing music. They don’t have to be linked together but the alcohol industry is so tightly connected to these music venues that there are generations of people who haven’t seen a show without buying alcohol. I am not straight-edge but I don’t think the businesses of Anheuser-Busch or Schlitz or Labatt should be in bed with these venues. Is there hope in dope? There’s no hope in dope!

larry: not lnp

words: LANCE HAKKER & UPDOWN (CRUDE QS)

Again. Louie Paradis, Nick Dirks and Jonas Michilot. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one. Go! Kill all of them so i would be jibber of the year forever. Alright: Cheese Dicks or Skeleton Crew? I’ve started my own crew. It’s Dirty Skeleton Dick. Who’s in it? It’s only me in it. There’s no blog or anything. It’s just like – yeah, pretty sick. Like a lot of snowboarders, Laurent loves skateboarding. And he’s really good at it. His flat-ground skills are on par with a lot of your favorite skateboarders’. But unlike all the dudes who pretend to love skateboarding and be above snowboarding, what’s refreshing about Laurent is that he doesn’t pretend to hate snowboarding. He loves it. This can be attributed to the fact that Laurent is Laurent. Sure he may be a hippie today and metal tomorrow, whatever – Laurent does what feels right and that will always be a good look for him. Lance over at Ashbury got the man himself on the phone recently and got him to discuss his intercontinental adventures, his misadventures, his shower technique and plenty more. UD: So what do you wanna go by from this day forward: LNP or Laurent? Laurent: I hate LNP. It’s too much like a star’s name. I like going by Laurent or Larry. Larry is solid – its super white trash. When did people begin calling you LNP? It was about five years ago, when I went down to Massachusetts for a contest. And it was a pretty good contest – it was about eight grand for the winner. So I won and the announcer couldn’t pronounce my full name so he called me LNP. Then I had a Rome ad just after that which read LNP and it stuck. Okay, Larry, here’s the shot out of the cannon. Megan Fox, Scarlett Johansson and Priscilla Levac. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one. Go! Fuck Megan Fox. Fuck then kill Scarlett and then Marry Priscilla Levac.

It’s a penguin lifestyle. Yeah, it’s a way of life. Who do you think crushes more pussy: Skeleton, Cheese Dick or your crew? Probably Skeleton Crew. On a more serious note, how was filming with Videograss? Amazing. Like, the best thing I’ve done so far in my snowboard career. It was so fun, it was like back in the day when you filmed with friends. There was no pressure, just filming whatever we wanted, you know? From me and Dirks just taking crappy pieces of wood and making stuff that wasn’t the craziest to snowboard to really riding whatever. And to film with my friends like Ben, Louie and Alex – it was pretty sick. Have you seen the video since the premieres with the credits? Yeah, I didn’t see the credits though. I have a copy with the credits, and there’s some Elf [Canon point and shoot] footy of Yan Starsky beating up all of you guys in the hotel room. The ultimate fight! Is that was it was? Yeah, we were drunk and you know Yan is a massive dude. So it’s, me and Jonas who are pretty small and Nick who’s pretty much a midget. And we decided that we were gonna fight him, and that was just impossible. He’d grab Nick and like, throw him from one bed to another. I swear Nick was flying through the air. Yeah, that part’s in there. Yeah. I’m not sure but I think that’s the night Yan got food poisoning from McDonald’s, and while filming the next morning he was gagging and was like, “Dude I’m gonna

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shit my pants. We have to leave!” What about shooting with Darth Meyer? Oh. Justin [Meyer]? Justin’s pretty fun to shoot with. He’s a crazy dude. Did he ever hate on anything you guys were doing? He’s kind of weird. He didn’t say anything, and when you land something and were like, “How was that?” he’d say, “You should do it again, dude.” And you’d be like, “Dude, come on!” and he’d go, “I’ve watched movies of you before and I know you can do better,” and I’m like, “Son of a bitch!” Yeah, Darth Meyer – he’s a gnarly dude. So do you like your part or do you think people are going to hate on it? You know what everybody says: you’re your own worst critic. I was super stressed out. But I like my part because it’s funny, you know? People watch my part and they laugh which is cool. So, yeah, trickwise – I am not sure. But part-wise, on a whole – I’m pretty stoked. Justin did a pretty good job with it. Now you’re also in a band called Mud Shit these days. How long have you been playing in that? Me and Nick started that last winter. We don’t have any instruments at the moment so we’re making most of the sounds with our mouths. We’re planning a Japan tour for this coming year. Will that tour conflict with your upcoming snowboard season? No because my twin brother Ron will play the tour while I film for videograss. So how was your last trip to Japan with Louie Paradis and Hofa this past year? It was crazy – insane. Like, the biggest culture shock. Everything was so different. From toilet seats to food to money to how they communicate. There’s absolutely no way you can feel at home. But yeah, it was so sick. It was probably the best trip I’ve done in my life so far. Anything in particular happen that was cool or crazy? Chris almost hooked up with a chick but then he got too drunk and passed out. And oh yeah, we partied in the smallest bar I’ve ever seen. It was

pretty much the size of my room at my parents’ house – so small. Eight in and it was pretty much full. I also tasted some fish stomach, squid and some other really weird shit. Did you like it? Not all of them. Fish stomach made me gag – I almost puked. Isn’t puking one of your biggest fears? It used to be. Now I’m kind of okay with it. I used to start shaking and freak out if I was going to puke. But now its not too bad. I’m still pretty scared of the notfeel-okay-after puke or the I’m-really-sick puke. You know what I mean? Yeah, not the I-drank-too-much,-Ithrew-up,-I-feel-better puke. Yeah, not that one. The one where you keep puking even though there’s nothing left in your stomach and you can’t really breathe. I’m pretty scared of that. If anybody around me doesn’t feel good and starts puking – I freak out. I guess I still have a little puking phobia. You been skating much this summer? Yeah, a lot actually. Like pretty much every day. Would you prefer to be a professional skateboarder or snowboarder? Probably a skateboarder. It would be cool if I could, with one wish, turn everything I have right now into skateboarding. So Videograss would be a skate movie, Nick would be that crazy bowl dude, Jed Anderson would be this crazy tech skater and Ashbury would just be a sunglass company. It’d be sick. Ashbury would be struggling trying to put together a snowboard team? Yeah. You know I’m still trying get on the Am team for Ashbury? Yeah, you gotta come down and get the nollie back heel down like a seven. I can’t nollie back heel. I can’t even airwalk down a seven. You know if you want to be an Am skateboarder now you pretty much have to switch trey bomb nine. Switch trey bomb nine? Yeah, it’s, like, a prerequisite. No way,

man. You don’t have to be a tech skater. You can be a super cool slash dude – you rip parks and crazy trannys in the street. I can do that, I think. Like a young [Nick] Dirks? Yeah, but I’m more street than Dirks. Dirks can’t kickflip. I can. So what do you like about Quebec, besides the obvious friends and family? It’s a cool place. It’s a giant skate park when it snows. People that come to Quebec usually come for rails. I’ve recently been driving around with Louif and finding the craziest spots. And there’s so many in the old part of Quebec it’s just like a giant skate park. So it’s pretty cool to live here. For people that are into powder, they’ll move to Whistler, but I’m mostly into rails, so I just stay home and ride rails. It’s a cool city to live in. It’s super mellow. Oh! [Picks up magazine] The new Thrasher’s out. Sick! James Brockman interview. I heard he’s getting crazy for the Zero video. Dude, I can’t wait for the Zero video. I think it comes out next month. I dunno. I know the Flip one is fall ’09 for sure. I was with Garrett Hill yesterday and he said it was coming out in December. Have you been to the Barracks lately? We went there to shoot Billy Marks’s ad. Oh, yeah. You guys are shooting mad ads, eh? Yeah, we just did it yesterday. Did you do Garrett Hill’s one? Yeah, we did Garrett’s yesterday. How’s Garrett? Is he a pretty cool dude? Yeah, he’s super cool. Him and his brother Ganchi are really easy-to-getalong-with, mellow dudes. Nice. So where’s your favorite spot for handrails other than home? I kind of like Salt Lake but you get kicked out of everywhere which is kind of gay, but I don’t know, dude. That’s a hard one. I guess – Oh! Minnesota’s pretty sick. It’s

pretty much an American Quebec. Same shit. All of the companies you ride for are smaller and rider-owned. Is this something you intended to do? Yeah. I’d rather ride for a company where I know the money goes to owner and his employees, than just one dude sitting at a desk who doesn’t know snowboarding. But this makes it hard for me because I don’t make, like, a million bucks. While dudes that ride for Monster... do you know? I read somewhere that Rome pays you with with a dog, three bananas and a couch every month. Is this true? Yeah. I get a box once a month. I usually trade the couch to a friend and sell the dead dog to a Chinese restaurant. It gets me through the month. So what’s getting you hyped in snowboarding right now? My friends – dudes that snowboard for fun and are fun to snowboard with. Is there anything you wish would just go away? [...] Energy drink companies. Hair gel or mousse? Straight natural grease! What is showering like? As quick as possible. I just don’t like it, I don’t know why. I still wash myself, you know? I get soap and wash myself. I don’t really wash my hair because it’s too long to dry. But, yeah, super quick. I’m sure I smell good. I don’t know – I just don’t like it. It’s kind of a waste of time.

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AUDIO

jesse fox: dance hall days photo: scott wade

Growing up in Collingwood, Ontario, Jesse Fox was known for three things: his snowboarding (obviously), his love of music and being an all-around good guy. When he wasn't riding at Blue Mountain, you'd often find him at punk shows in Toronto or performing in his own bands, Captain Trips and later Blond at the Roots with Jon Roth. When Jesseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s snowboard career brought him out west, he didn't leave music behind. From his magazine features to the

songs in his video parts, it was clear that music was still a huge part of who he was. He's now given up snowboarding professionally for a job in the industry. On a recent trip back to Ontario, he gave Updown a taste of what heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s listening to at the moment. You can listen to his playlist at updownmag.com. So go!

tina

todd malus?. ingemar backman

murray hodgson

scott shaw logan short

dwayne wiebe

NONE OF THESE PEOPLE WILL APPEAR IN THUNDERMOUTH

ryan hall

gavin TOM

jonas guinn

andrew hardingham

dustin ‘kim jong il’ craven fred

tobias karlsson charles white?

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NATE BOZUNG: malaka words: matty ryan & UPDOWN

If you are one of those people who think snowboarding has become stale and a bit too corporate, you probably haven’t been keeping tabs on Nate Bozung or his BozWreck crew. At the moment Nate’s living on the other side of the world, in Greece, eyes-deep in ouzo. Considering that, it’s hard to believe we were even able to get an interview. But after seeing his Ouzo Interview online, you know we had to try. It wasn’t easy, and it wouldn’t have even happened if it wasn’t for Matty Ryan. Matty was heading to Greece to meet up with Nate, so we passed along a bunch of questions to ask Bozung. (Nate answered some of the questions and hated most of them but we got it done.) As you’ll soon read, it was not a conventional interview. Nate flip-flopped between responding to Matty’s questions and, in the next breath, speaking directly into the video camera to the video’s future audience as well as people like Todd Richards, us here at Updown, his mom and even his worst enemies. (We’ve put these sidebar comments in brackets.) Sometimes we have no clue whom he was addressing, but nonetheless... BOZWRECK! UD: If you could punch any celebrity in the face with no repercussions, who would it be? Nate: I don’t give a fuck.

Whatever. Who cares? A celebrity? Yeah. I don’t know. Like, what the fuck’s a celebrity? Shaun White. Done! Totally, done. How did you end up becoming a pro snowboarder? Dude, here’s the answer to that one. (I have no fucking idea.) Whatever. (How does anyone do anyfing? Anyfing.) Anything. When did snowboarding stop being fun for you? (All’s I’ve gotta say is I’ve read all your motherfucking comments and, yeah, I’m “bad for the sport.” Thank god, right? Thank god I’m bad for the sport. That’s what I want. Na na na naaaa.) What was the question? [Laughs] When did snowboarding stop being fun for you? (Yo, just ’cause I talk shit doesn’t mean I hate snowboarding. Just because I don’t film doesn’t mean I hate snowboarding. I told you guys every time – I tell everyone: I’m gonna keep snowboarding until I die because I got a fucking passion for it. So fuckin’ suck on my motherfuckin’ dick. Beat it.) Why are you into fixed gears and the culture? Because I was forced to. [Laughs] Really. I was stuck in Athens, and I’m not gonna buy a fucking car here. Harry, he fucking rides a bike. Like, he doesn’t have a car. He rides a bike

rider: nate bozung photo: ken adams

This page & next page: rider: nate bozung, photo: bob plumb

everyday to work, 15 miles there and back, blah blah blah. (Stanley, Christian, my boy Christian fuckin’ kills it. And all’s they talk about is biking, and I was like hating on it forever. Like, “Fuck bikes, blah blah blah. I did that when I was five. Ugh, it’s so easy.” Like what everyone says. Then finally, malaka, I tried it and it’s hard as fuck! And it’s fuckin’ so sick.) I just – that question made the joint go out. (Fuck you.) How much weed do you have to smoke to get in High Times magazine? (More than you, motherfucker.) Whatever. That’s a straight idiot question. Is this dude a cop? Should we just cancel the whole thing right now? No, we should do it, it’s going good. Is blow just a recreational thing for you? What? What’s blow? (Oh, no, I don’t do drugs, sorry. I’m a – I’m a republican.) Is ouzo laced with cocaine? No. Where did you get that from? No, I dunno, it’s not laced with cocaine, but it’s something within the plant that they make it from but it’s – dude, I can’t sleep anymore. You spent some time in Canada on the run from the law. What’s the story here? Did you? I didn’t know I was on the run from the law. I guess I just never got caught and I had no idea. I mean, I didn’t have a license for three years and I thought I did, so it could be possible. I was stuck there for three months when I told DC to fuck off and I was trying to sleep under mini-ramps and shit and whatever, dude, malaka, crazy crazy time. That’s a whole other book right there you could write. (Hey, what up? Get me a publishing deal, bitch.) Didn’t you almost own a meat pie store in Whistler? Nah, I didn’t own it but I got sponsored by it. I didn’t have, like, no paychecks, no nothing. Like, I would sit out in front of the snowboard shop and everyone would flick fucking quarters to me and watch me go fuckin’ grab ‘em and pick up change all day, enough to get a Slurpee. But, anyways, long story short... (yes, I got sponsored by Shakespeare’s Pies and I got it every

fuckin’ night, fuckin’ wasted, I got to skip the whole line. Fuck all y’all.) No, that’s cool though. You wouldn’t have had any other way to eat, right? Nope. (‘Cause Browner [Chris Brown] kicked me out. Asshole.) I was such a bum in Whistler, dude, people were tripping on me. I was that kid just wandering around town, all hours of every day. This is how I survived in Whistler. I’d go to the bar and Sue (What up, Sue?), she was the bartender, and I’d show up there and there’d be all snowboarders there and everyone would be like, “Oh, Nate, what’s up?” Whatever. And they would trip out that I was just, like, cool, and would say “What up?” back and would end up getting fucking wasted with them. And I’d end up every single night in the boondocks at some house party, like, fucking off my face. Like, dude, it was a mess. I rented a room with [Kris] Wilson out of Devun’s [Walsh] basement for like a month but I stayed there two nights or three nights out of the whole month. I was malaka. Just out of your gourd. If you ever go back to Canada who would you want to snowboard with? Wes Makepeace, Chris Brown, Dano Trakalo. Hold on. I’m going through my Facebook right now. [Laughs] Next question. Are you a Mormon? Fuck yeah I was a Mormon, and hell no I’m not no more. It wasn’t my choice. I was brought up that way. Do you have “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart” tattooed on your chest? No, now it says “Trust in Marley with all thine heart.” (Like Bob Marley). Do you have any kids? Well, I hope not. [Laughs] Not that I know of. I’ve been coming up short lately so no, I don’t think so. What is your best self tat? Um, my best one’s this one. The one you saw on episode one [of Nate’s Adventures]. It’s Harry’s tat. It’s a snowflake but it’s really nothing.

rider: nate bozung photo: bob plumb

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What’s that one say right there? [on Nate’s wrist] Oh. “Mom.” But then it also says “Wow” with an exclamation mark. Why did you get kicked off Facebook? (’Cause I fuckin’ kill it. Now I have three accounts. Three motherfuckin’ accounts. Fuck Facebook. I will fuck your page up, yo.) What kind of feedback have you got from the Ouzo Interview? I don’t fucking keep tabs on it. I don’t give a fuck about it. I’m actually a little embarrassed about it but whatever, move on with your life. People have been asking me those questions for fucking ten years and I always avoided ’em’ and I had to drink two bottles of ouzo to answer them, and I knew they were coming and that’s what happened. Like, whatever, I don’t like to be that pissed off, but sometimes, like, fuck, dude, I am pissed off... Is your brother still in jail? No, he’s out, he’s out of jail. He got out like two months ago. And, uh, his name’s Garrett. (Garrett Bozung, dude, I’m giving you all credit for everything that’s happening – this little fuckin’ stupid interview, this whole snowboarding shit – because you motherfucking got me into skateboarding back in the day in the harbour, you and Joey Langan, you two motherfuckers. And Chris Baumgartner, and all the motherfuckers, and I wanted to be like my older brother, so I’m blaming you for all this mother shit. Motherfuckin’ shit. No, I’m not blaming you. But you know what I mean. Dude, I’m livin’ in my own fuckin’ jail cell out here, bro. Believe me. The world’s a motherfuckin’ shit hole.) He’s outta jail, he’s got a girlfriend and he’s fuckin bladowin’ it! That’s what my mom tells me. (What’s up, mom?) Do you think you’ll ever do any time? I hope not. I fuckin’ hope not. How street are you? Dude, I’m so suburb it’s crazy. Like, out on the farm, like… totally dude. (Totally.) Who and what are you hating on in general? I hate the world. That’s it. Fuck it. It’s like the world is sucked up and

everyone’s squares and wrapped up in a little routine and this is how it’s supposed to be done, blah blah blah. (But everyone loves pirate movies!) Biggest beefs with snowboarders and how they started? (Isn’t the word “beef” – isn’t that like 1998, ‘97? Like, really? Beef? I got no beefs with no one. They got beefs with me. They just jealous, motherfuckin’ hatas yo! Fuck y’all motherfuckas!) Do you still owe Todd Richards four grand? Nope I owe him $3,900. I did a switchback 780 down Antho’s four set, wasted! Yeah, $3,900. (I’m gonna pay you, Todd, I swear to god. It’s just taxes, motherfuckin’ IRS is holdin’ me down like a motherfucker, yo. I swear I’m gonna pay you. I know that’s your boy’s little fuckin’ college fund. I know, you told me. I know.) What is your role with Neff? I started it with Neff and, um… You’re rollin’. I’m rollin’! (I get paychecks, bitch.) And I design, and I fuckin’ – I still help out with shit, but I’m still trave – like, whatever, dude. (I’m a fuckin mess, dude. I can’t do anything!) [Laughs] What’s the first thing you’ll do if you go back to Utah? (I’m gonna go straight to church.) [Laughs] I ain’t going back to Utah. Fuck Utah, dude. Piece of shit place. What are your plans in New York City? Pssh. I have no idea. What are your plans? It’s just a better place to live than Salt Lake. That’s my plan. Exactly. Malaka? Malaka means “fuck,” pretty much, is the bottom line. Or whatever you want it to mean. Like, I could point at this beer and go “Malaka” and, like, whatever, it’s just the best word ever. Just say it. Final words? Pink Mafia, BozWreck 3000 and Neff. (Go fuck yourself. Done. How do you turn it off?)

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ANDREW HARDINGHAM: blacklist words & photo: ANDREW HARDINGHAM

Amish |ä-mish| plural noun. The members of a strict Mennonite sect that established major settlements in Pennsylvania, Ohio, and elsewhere in North America from 1720 onward. Amish people are dumb and smell bad. That's mighty ignorant and not very smart to say, however it will never come back to bite me because the Amish don't read magazines or watch movies. They don't

believe in technology at all so I have rated them as the best people/culture to make fun of without worry of repercussions. I've often wondered why you never see gangster rappers in tabloid magazines or on TMZ. Gangsta rappers will fuck you up if you mess with them, but rich white people will just take it in the brown. They might sue you. Anyway, it's safer to just say, “From now on, I'm only dissing the Amish.”

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The snowboarding world is filled with a lot of lame shit. Save yourself the effort and let updownmag.com sift through shit for you. We don’t mind. We create and gather only the best (Ed Hardy-free) content from on and beyond the snow. Here are a few reasons why you should visit updownmag.com on the regular. We update the site daily. You can win stuff

from our supporters. There are exclusive features, a whole new blog section and you can also explore this entire issue online with ‘mag-to-web’ video content including The Nate Bozung Interview from Greece, Eman’s face slam and Q&A, Laurent’s skate edit and so much more. Now go!

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