Pearl Sistahs Magazine SPRING 2016 by Stephanie McKenny

PEARL CHRISTIAN WOMENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Celebrating WOMEN IN MINISTRY TEMPTATION: IS IT A REAL STRUGGLE?

DR. YVONNE Capehart

Healing Lives One Heart At A Time DIVORCED BUT NOT DESTROYED

SPRING 2016

TAKE A PEEK.... Pearl Wearing Days, 5 From the Editor’s Desk, 6

Walking By Faith, 20

Cover Story

7 WOMEN IN MINISTRY - Dr. Yvonne Capehart

Inspirational 12

Fruitful Confident Life - Dr. Joyvina Evans

Women in Ministry

17 Lady Donna Beard 25 Prophetess Angela Kirksey 27 Pastor Laytecia McKinney

Relationships 19 Why wait? - LeTasha S. Robinson 23 Sister’s Keeper 29 Charging It To Principle - Charisma Floyd

Daily Living 9 14 34

Temptation The Struggle Is Real - Geraldine Powell Divorced By Not Destroyed - Dishan Washington Chasing Your Fears - Keisha A. Rivers Shorty

36 What Are You Sacrificing With Your Yes? - Michelle Johnson Garrett

Visionary Woman

16 HETLENA JOHNSON - Living wth Lupus

Health 31 Mammogram

Business 38 5 Secrets to Overcoming a Marketing Setback - Angel Coleman

MAGAZINE

CONTRIBUTORS

Editor-in-Chief Publishing Company Graphic Designer

Stephanie L . McKenny J & J Publishing Sherilyn Bennett

Contributing Writers For This Issue

ANGELA

DR. JOYVINA

COLEMAN

CHARISMA FLOYD

EVANS

MICHELLE GARRETT JOHNSON

KEISHA

RIVERS SHORTY

STEPHANIE McKENNY

LeTASHA S. ROBINSON

JENEEN

JEFFERSON

GERALDINE POWELL

DISHAN

WASHINGTON

PEARL

Wearing Days WE CAUGHT YOU WITH YOUR PEARLS ON

FROM THE

EDITOR’S DESK...

Dear Pearl Sistahs!!! God is so amazing! I can’t even begin to tell you how thankful I am for this issue in many ways. God is so faithful and I’m so glad He did not give up on me. This issue actually marks a one year celebration of Pearl Sistahs Magazine for being in existence (Yay!!! God did it!). Not too long ago, I can remember receiving all these messages from people in my LinkedIn page congratulating me on my anniversary. At first, I was trying to figure out why these people were congratulating me and then it dawned on me that I referenced the start date of Pearl Sistahs Magazine in April 2015. I sat back and began to thank God for allowing this magazine to continue. Throughout this year, there have been many setbacks to keep it from being birthed and from continuing, but GOD! At times it was difficult, but within my heart I felt there was a need to continue. This magazine is more than a magazine. It is a movement for women. It is a ministry tool to minister to the hearts of women all over the world. It is portal that will connect women together all over the world. Yes, I prophesy to myself. I can’t give up. I won’t give up……God has the final say.

started. He’s okay with you starting a lot of things, but he will make every effort to make sure you don’t finish. Ignore him. Stay focused because you are on assignment. Put on your spiritual gloves and fight for what God has purposed for you to accomplish by just doing it! You can’t even imagine how excited I am about this issue that commemorates the first year of Pearl Sistahs Magazine with celebrating women in ministry. Many people don’t realize what men and women in ministry encounter as they walk in and fulfill the assignment that God has over their lives. We often see the glitter and the glamour, but we don’t see what battles they face behind the scenes. My prayer is that you cover those in ministry all over the world. There assignment is great and they need to be covered in prayer (that includes me!). As you read through the pages of this issue, my prayer is that you will be encouraged in some way by the words that are shared from these amazing contributing writers. Welcome to the Pearl Sistahs Community! Continue to be blessed and continue to walk in your divine assignment for the Lord!

I’ve learned through this experience that sometimes things may not flow the way you would desire for them to, but that doesn’t mean to give up. You have to see things through. You have to realize that the vision, dream, goal is beyond you and beyond your own personal desires. What God has placed in you and wants to produce out of you is beyond YOU. So, I want to send these words of encouragement to you……keep pressing. Keep pushing, keep moving; keep doing what God has assigned no matter what the opposition is. If He placed it in you, then you know He wants you to accomplish it. The enemy doesn’t want to see it come into existence. The enemy doesn’t want to see you finish what you

Honored to serve,

6 P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

WOMEN IN MINISTRY

DR. YVONNE CAPEHART Q: How long have you been in Ministry? A: I have been in ministry for 20 years with 18 of them as a fulltime traveling evangelist across the world. Before ministry I was a High School Intervention Specialist and worked in the School District for 13 years. Q: How did you feel after you realized God was calling you to the ministry? A: At first I was very disappointed because I had just earned a Master Degree to continue my dreams and desire of becoming a High School Principal, however once I embraced my Destiny it became easier to release my dreams. I am totally honored that God chose me to carry His Word throughout the world healing lives one heart at a time.

Q: Did you attend school for ministry? If so, where? A: Yes, I earned my doctorate degree from Jacksonville Theological Seminary in Pastoral Counseling in May 2001. I can’t believe it has been that long. Although I attended the Seminary for some formal training and education my personal statement has always been that I didn’t receive my anointing from the Seminary, I earned it from the Cemetery. I truly had to die to do what I do. It was out of my brokenness that I discovered my assignment for the broken. Q: What opposition did you face? With being a woman in ministry did you face opposition from male clergy? A: It is not hard to tell with the Title of one of my Books, “The Spirit of Assassination” that I have endured many attacks against the anointing and the assignment on my life. Surprisingly many of my attacks have not been from male clergy most of them have been from females in ministry or lay members. I understand now why that was the case, since the ministry that God gave me is Sister Keeper International Ministries. I am committed to keeping and covering my sisters even if at times I feel uncovered by a few of them. Q: What are some of your greatest achievements in ministry? A: One of the greatest achievements that I have had the opportunity to do in ministry was the founding of “RB’s House”

WOMEN IN MINISTRY

DR. YVONNE CAPEHART a transitional home for young women in crisis from 2003 to 2013. I am in the process now of expanding this vision through the development of The Healing Life Center, which will be a safe place for the hurting to heal, a place for couples to reconnect, and a safe place for marriages to be mended. I am really excited about the next season in ministry. Q: How did being in the ministry affect your marriage/ family/ children? A: I have been married for 30 years. My husband has always been supportive of my full-time ministry as well as all of the other assignments and organizations that I have founded. However with the responsibility of my traveling ministry as well as our roles as Pastor of our local church Believers Life Center in Pensacola, FL, we have faced many challenges. With Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s help, wisdom, and guide we have been able to survive the storms of time. My two sons who are now grown, 27 and 24 have always been supportive and proud of all that God has called me to do. Q: What wisdom would you share with another woman getting involved in ministry? What advice would you give her? A: Make sure you are first called by God. Move according to Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s timing. Always remember that your obedience to God will always create opposition from others. Never lose your uniqueness of being one of a kind. You will only find peace when you embrace your purpose

P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

Temptation... Is it a real Struggle?

Written by: Geraldine Powell You ever wonder why you get tempted? The bible says… “1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

1. What is the big deal over this temptation thing? 2. Why does it seem to win? 3. What are we doing at the conception of the idea? 4. How come we can’t stand up to it to fight for our victory over it? Before you answer, just take a glance at the above opening scripture… “he will not let you be tempted,” so he is not the one tempting you … “but with the temptation” … you will be tempted, its unavoidable, and “he will also provide the way to escape… “he is the source of your escape, the proverbial life vest if you so choose to accept it. The thing about temptation is...YOU HAVE THE

TOOLS TO GAIN CONTROL OVER IT!!! It only controls you if you allow it. In fact, why do we talk about it like it’s a separate entity. It’s within us and we, what some might say, conjure it up by placing ourselves in the positions, situations that are trigger points; temptation is caused by what we secretly desire in our hearts.

What Defiles a Man Matthew 15:17-20 (ESV) 17 Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled? [a] 18 But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. 19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. 20 These are what defile a person…” It’s not some sort of spooky sin that no one knows about that catches us unexpectedly. It’s not a jackinabox... you turn the wheel and it pops out. The only part of the jack in the box that is real is YOU TURN THE WHEEL…what happens next should not be a surprise…cause and effect. Continued P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

TEMPTATION - COVER STORY 1. http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/22‐bible‐verses‐about‐temptation/; 2. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+15%3A17‐20&version=ESV What’s the deal with temptation? It’s used like some sort of uncontrollable excuse for bad behavior. A decease for which there is no cure. An intruder that invades our deepest most intimate place and wins the battle. It’s not so much that we cannot control ourselves, it’s that we choose not to. I know that sounds opinionated, but true fact…we DO HAVE THE ABILITY TO CONTROL ourselves. The fact that we don’t and we utilize the excuse that “temptation is a struggle” is by far the biggest lie the enemy has ever told us. We all have struggles. Boundless struggles in a plethora of areas. The fact that we blow around like leaves in a sudden storm is the problem.There is no mystery. Temptation doesn’t come like a thief in the night…it’s a festering, nagging, controlling entity that we forget we have the ability to fend off. When the attack is over – why is it that we stand there like victims after an assault asking how did this happen? You’re not a victim!! Stop playing one. How many losses must we endure before we recognize that our desires ARE the struggle. We want: • More money • More stuff • Different mates (temporarily) • Higher positions in our employment • More sex, more often • Etc., etc., etc – fill in your blanks In our daunting daily tasks, we imagine the flip side of e of where we are in any given category. Always looking at what we “don’t” have versus what we “do” have. We look at our mates, become dissatisfied and good old temptation speaks a word of encouragement that there is another way to get satisfied…pick a different one! Yup…your/my dirty heart says go fishing in another lake. Doesn’t matter that the prize fish we caught in the first lake is still full of vitality…we want something “better!” We’d rather swim in shark and piranhainfested waters because the pickings are so much more exciting; ducking and dodging, peeping and sneaking, shucking and jiving. We want new at P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

any cost! Question is, what is the real cost of “NEW?” When I get a hankering for “something new, different, exciting, secretive,” I laugh and say…” I’m not too old for my wants to hurt me.” This being that I already know where that road leads. It’s an infinity step into troublesome solitude. Once I get what I want, I seclude myself because I know I obtained it illegally so to speak. I went around what was right to get what was wrong and ended up bankrupt. What an outcome. Not the PRIZE I was aiming for. I was tempted…and I surrendered. Guess who loses when we fail to show restraint, selfcontrol and faith? This isn’t me picking on you, I speak from a very mutual place. I am by no means in a position to point any of my fingers at anyone, so I’m imploring you to accept our unity conversation on what can’t win every single time – temptation. I’m in that boat with you, standing against the same “struggle” as you. No man is an island really applies when we realize the magnitude of strength it takes to stand against temptation, which is us fighting against our own secretive desires. What can we do to combat this invisible intruder? Response…HELP EACH OTHER ATTAIN THE VICTORY! We really are our brothers’/sisters’ keeper. In Genesis 4:9, God asked Cain, “Where is your brother?” Cain responded, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” Go figure, Cain was being persnickety with God. What a concept, giving attitude to your own Creator… smh. When God is asking, he already knows your heart and what’s going to come out of it using the vessel of your mouth. Often, my momma used to ask me a question as an opportunity for me to think before I spoke. She already knew the answer, but she was waiting on me to give what she already knew. I truly believe that God did the same thing to Cain. He knew what Cain had done, but he gave him an opportunity to fess up. How do we help one another when we live in a society that posts EVERYTHING on social media and then we have the audacity to say, “Mind your business?” Lolololol (laughing out loud…a lot), that to me is such an oxymoron. How are you going to tell me to mind my

TEMPTATION business when you broadcast it in a social venue? How am I going to help you make it? I’m going to approach you discreetly and ask you if you need help combating what is visibly an issue that could defeat you. By no means is it an easy task. We are so on the defensive of anyone helping and rightfully so. The motives of so many have made it so hard to trust an extended olive branch. We must do better so that when we are in a position to be the trusted olive branch, it will be accepted. When we see our brothers and sisters heading down the road MOST traveled and we can relate to the impending outcome – which is failure, we must do something to help them. Temptation is not one of those things that you can continually watch someone struggle through. It truly should hurt your heart to know that you’ve been negatively affected by your own admission and decision making and you would allow another person to make the same error? I do get it! Some folk make it tremendously hard to assist them. They are so dogmatic about “doing them” that your intended intervention is unwanted. And let’s not forget the nosey, busybody that just gets in to know your business…there are flaws on both sides of the situation. All we can do is offer the olive branch. Like the old saying, you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink. The last segment that gives you the ability to still help is in the background, it’s called prayer. The whole part of faith is based on our belief in God, and communication with Him and action after our proclamation. No matter what the overall topic of human struggle is, prayer, faith and belief are the remedy. As people, we don’t always accept the help of

those with the wisdom of failure and how to recover. In some situations, we can put it out there that we want to help, but if rejected, we must keep the peace and retreat. But in retreating, its prayer time. We must admit that we don’t always know what’s best for ourselves or for others, but our prayers are always needed. We don’t have to confront, battle or become involved in a situation that we have visibly been ejected from. We can pray thereafter the ejection. I am not saying – look, gossip and pray. I’m saying pray for guidance, offer help, and if rejected pray again. We can only be the antibacterial cream for the proverbial injury if allowed. Temptation is serious and alive. If for nothing, we must be able to relate and be compassionate and nonpartial to our brothers and sisters in need of our learned wisdom through our failures against that enemy called temptation. The soapbox era must be put to rest. It should sadden your heart to see a child of God suffering from their own errors and bad judgement. Knowing that the enemy has placed the plate of temptation in front of them and made it impossible for them to turn away. Love will draw them, if you extend it. May God bless you in your quest to keep your brothers and sisters from falling for that slick cat called temptation.

We are so on the defensive of anyone helping and rightfully so. The motives of so many have made it so hard to trust an extended olive branch. We must do better so that when we are in a position to be the trusted olive branch, it will be accepted.

P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

Fruitful

Confident

Life

Langston Hughes wrote a poem entitled “Mother to Son” that depicts the struggles and perseverance of a mother. Like the mother in that poem, I must admit that ‘life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.’ I’ve had a lot of heartache, pain, grief, misery, and chaos. However, my faith and perseverance reminded me that I had to keep fighting, keep pushing, and I had to get myself together. I realized that God can turn a mess into a message, your misery into your misery, your test into a testimony, and your chaos into confidence. In order for me to lead the fruitful and confident life that God had for me, I had to recognize the following: P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

1. I needed God and a support system. The bible says “faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.” Therefore, I knew that I had to completely saturate myself in the Word. I had to dive deep into the Word and develop an intimate relationship with God. I had to continue going to Sunday and Wednesday worship services, but I also had to step it up. I had to listen to sermons, read the Word, and talk with God regularly. At times, I was embarrassed and ashamed by past experiences. God placed angels in my life to help me get through that season. I had spiritual counsel and I sought professional help. Please understand that there is nothing wrong with you if you seek professional help. You are actually very wise if you recognize that you need assistance. Don’t allow anyone to make you feel embarrassed or ashamed for being single or for going through tough times. God used that situation to plan my destiny and to help me minister to others.

FRUITFUL CONFIDENT LIFE • DR. JOYVINA EVANS 2. I had to forgive myself and others. You may wonder why I had to forgive myself. It was imperative that I forgive myself for past mistakes, things that I said or did not say, and I even had to forgive myself for being mad at God when things didn’t go my way. We all have made mistakes and done some things that we are not proud of and sometimes we are ashamed or embarrassed. Regardless if you entered into a relationship that you knew wasn’t the best, lied, or cheated…you must forgive yourself. Allow the messups, stumbling blocks, and mistakes to develop you and not to destroy you. After we’ve forgiven ourselves, we must choose to forgive others. I know it is sometimes hard to do, but it is necessary. Luke 6:28 tells us to “Pray for those who mistreat us or persecute us.” Even Jesus said on the cross, “Forgive them father for they know not what they do.” It is possible that people in your past did not know how to treat you or love you because they weren’t taught. I read a quote that said unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting something to happen to the other person. NO, you are the one affected by unforgiveness.

Like me, please remember that your life, your provision, your joy should not be predicated on people or things….it should be predicated on God. Ultimately, BAD things will happen. The bible is clear in Matthew 5:45 that God ‘sends rain on the just and the unjust.’ Nevertheless, we have to remember that God also promised in Romans 8:28 that “All” things will work together for our good.” The scripture never said it would feel good…but it did say it would work together FOR our good. Keep going and Keep climbing! Greater days are ahead. Confidently Yours, Dr. Joyvina Evans Author|Professor|Founder of Confidence Academy IG and Periscope: @iamdrjoy Twitter: iam_drjoy

3. I had to become content in my current season. Yes, contentment was key. I have a lot of favorite quotes and one of them is “You see my glory, but you don’t know my story.” Whatever you do, do not covet what someone else has. Instead of looking at others and instead of looking at what you don’t have…I challenge you to take on the attitude of the Apostle Paul when he said in Philippians 4, “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have LEARNED to be content whatever the circumstances.” The term “learn” signifies that contentment is not something we are born with…we have to grow into contentment. I had to realize that contentment and joy are not found in a man, money, or in a career. I had to learn that regardless where I am at in life, I have to be grateful and thankful.

P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

DIVORCED BUT NOT

DESTROYED By Dishan Washington

On January 4, 1997, when I said my wedding vows in front of an audience of about 700 people, at the age of sixteen years old, I truly believed it was going to be until death did us part. I had noidea that fifteen years later, my husband, my best friend, my lover, would walk out of the door leaving me broken, shattered, and helpless. No one could have ever prepared me for the long days and nights of grief that would plague me and threaten my sanity so to the point that I would eventually try to take my own life. As much of a Christian as I was, as much of a prayer warrior as I was, as much of an encourager as I was, the devastation of divorce left me perpetually tethering along the edge of depression. There were days when I felt I was going to lose my mind from the emotional roller coaster my heart took me on daily. One minute, I wanted him and ourfamily back, the next minute, I hated everything about him. One minute, I wanted to believe God to restore our marriage, and the next minute, I was so happy to be free from the emotional prison that at one time held me bound. P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

Being a 3rd generation Pastor’s wife, it was quite embarrassing to feel as though I’d failed my history. My grandmother held her marriage together for fifty years until her time of death. My mother, well, she’s still holding it together, and it’s going on forty years. As a CoPastor, I felt I’d failed as a leader. As the new mother of a ten month old baby at the time he walked out of the door for the last time, I felt I’d failed our daughter by not giving her the same privilege I was afforded in growing up in a home with both of her parents. The beginning of our marriage was filled with a lot of trial and error, and a lot of me duplicating what I saw my mother and grandmother do. I mean, I was sixteen years old. What was I expected to know about being a wife? When we got married we felt it was what God wanted us to do. We had dreams and goals of having a mega church one day. We would often take long rides and discuss our mission—what we felt was our life calling. My exhusband was and is a very gifted man. We knew that his charm, his talents, and my talents combined would take us as far as we wanted to go. And eventually it did. Although we started our life together with the bare minimum, and even at one point being homeless together and staying in a rundown hotel; we were blessed to spend our latter years together dressing in designer pieces, eating at five star restaurants, driving a Bentley, having two homes, and a congregation that went from 17 to 1000 people in Continued

DIVORCED BUT NOT DESTROYED in its first year. By every stretch of our imagination, we were the church world’s next top ministry couple. While we were quickly rising to the top of ministry, we were also sinking to new lows in our marriage. We were the epitome of a public success and private failure. So to the point that when people found out we were no longer together, it was scarcely believed. We had done a great job of wearing our mask of perfection, and I, as a wife, trying to hold my family together, had assisted in this cover up. I later lived to regret it. Mainly because the first step to getting help is uncovering the problem. On December 27, 2011, I became a statistic. I became a woman who went from a life of luxury to a life that led me to homelessness, sleeping in my car, on the couches of friends, and relying on government assistance. I became the woman who hated Christmas and any other family holiday, because the memories—both good and bad— threatened to slowly suffocate whatever life remained. However, in time, my faith in God, blended with hard work, and a support system who allowed me to bleed my hurt onto them, led me to a serene place of healing. My transparency was the conduit that ultimately set me free from the iron clad jaws of low selfesteem and feelings of rejection—two of many things brought on by divorce. I had to learn it was perfectly normal to cry—to grieve. And even more important to note, I had to learn that there is no clock or calendar attached to your grieving process. Can’t nobody tell you when to “get over it.” Can’t nobody tell you when it’s time to “move on.” That’s a conclusion you must arrive at when it’s right for you. I made the mistake of attempting to heal by pseudo loving someone else too soon.

back; a man who I desperately wanted to fill a void that he didn’t create. If not careful, divorce can be like a contagious disease, and the effects of it will rub off on unsuspecting individuals causing their life to be negatively altered or affected. I have a beautiful two year old little girl whose life was selfishly created while I was trying to use someone to heal. She is one of my greatest blessings and is my greatest lesson. I created a conference in 2015, “Divorced But Not Destroyed,” with the purpose of directing broken individuals to a place of restoration, recovery, and refreshing. I feel it is my duty to pour into the lives of individuals who need to know that someone understands and cares. I feel it is necessary to let people know they can survive even if they’re left with broken pieces. Since that day in 2011, I’ve spent many moments in the pit. I’ve had quite a few setbacks while trying to comeback from such a deep hurt. I’ve had days where I’ve longed for restoration, and that’s I felt I didn’t deserve it. There have been days I woke up with energy, and days where depression held me confined to the bed. But, through it all, I made it. I survived. I overcame. And when you look at me today, I think most would agree that I do not look like what I’ve been through. That’s the beauty of this story. My life with my exhusband ended, but in my field, we would just call that the end of THAT story. I’m currently living out my sequel because MY story is still being written every day that I wake up. And more than ever I’m determined, even borderline fixated, on having my happily ever after. Am I sad? No. Bitter? No.

You can’t properly love someone else when major parts of you are broken. As a result, I had a baby out of wedlock with a man who didn’t love me

Why? Because I know that ALL things have worked and are working for my good! P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

ISIONARY LIVING WITH LUPUS BY HETLENA JOHNSON young niece in my arms. This gave many people who saw me in public, the impression that I was in a wheelchair due to complications during pregnancy. This wasn’t true. The only child I had that was gearing towards the terrible two’s was Lupus. Lupus doesn’t just always make you “look sick.” By the time I was able to walk with a cane I was down from 80 milligrams of Prednisone to about 60 or 65 milligrams a day.

“Do you know what Lupus is?” A doctor asked me that question almost 22 years ago. My answer was, “No. No I don’t.” As for my mother, who was sitting in the chair that all knowing hospital room chair in the corner, her eyes had widened. At the time, she did not know what Lupus was either. And to be honest, I still don’t know what it is. Lupus is a very complicated disease. It is unpredictable, complex in the nature of its symptoms, and can be fatal without proper medical treatment. I have had the opportunity to host this autoimmune disease since I was a budding teenager. I was so ready for the world before I met Lupus. While under its spell, I was blessed to have been placed on homebound my whole senior year. The version of this chronic disease that I was introduced to is known as Systemic Lupus Erythematosus, or SLE for short. SLE is feared to be one of the most dangerous kinds of Lupus to have. It can affect many different parts of your body. I couldn’t walk, at all, for a while. But I enjoyed being wheeled by my caring family and friends as I often held my P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

My pain was unbearable at the time. Yet my vanity was worst hit. Being a young woman, you want to look your best, but when your hair falls out and your face breaks out –worse than acne— it’s devastating! It’s very hard to feel beautiful— inside and out. Having Lupus meant I had to be careful with things that irritated my sensitive skin. And my hair had fun leaving me to myself when I looked in the mirror. It was not a stress free stage at all. My collective memories of the phases of my diagnosis were upsetting. And at times, dealing with my Lupus, is still challenging. Because Lupus affects my joints, skin, kidneys, blood cells, heart, and lungs, I need a treatment that is affordable, available, and in abundance. The strongest medicine that I take every day is Faith. It is so malleable. Because no two Lupus patients’ symptoms are alike, all Lupus patients are different and special, in distinctive ways. I am often asked, “How do you do it?” No matter how many times I have been asked that question, I still sparkle inside. That sparkle ignites my heart to express to others that they must take hold of this lifethreatening illness by taking control of their mindsets. Here are a few things that help me manage my Lupus.

Continued

VISIONARY - LIVING WITH LUPUS 1. Write it down! Use any little notebook, calendar, or even a smartphone app to keep a record of your symptoms. This helps communicate your symptoms to your medical physician.

2. Get active! Many patients diagnosed with Lupus cannot do varying physical tasks. But anyone can move what he or she has. From squeezing a tennis ball in your hand to rolling a golf ball under your foot, movement is like magic. Battle the fatigue as much as you can stand. 3. Fight the fog! Pain, medication, emotions, and other things can fill the brain with confusion. Fight the fog by keeping your brain busy. Do puzzles listen to upbeat music, talk, or just listen to someone else talk. Even consider learning something new on YouTube! 4. Make a monthly date with yourself! One of my favorite therapies is massage therapy. Massages that are not prescribed by a physician for medical

reasons may require contracts or memberships to take advantage of discounts. Shania Brown LMT BCTMB, of Meditating Massage Wellness Studio, says, “Professional Clinical Massage Therapy is highly recommended to assist several issues as part of a wellness maintenance program.”* You will be surprised by how much better you feel when you keep your mind engaged. There is no balance of life when you live with an autoimmune disease such as Lupus. Ultimately, you have to ask yourself, “Do I live with this thing called Lupus, or do I let it live with me?” *The author of this article is not licensed to provide medical advice, professional diagnosis, opinion, treatment or services to any individual. This content of this article is for general information purposes only and provides information that is based on the author’s opinion. More information about the author’s journey can be read in her book, “Diary of a MAD Lupus Patient” available on Amazon.com.

WOMEN IN MINISTRY Q: How long have you been in ministry? A: I have been in ministry for the past 30 years.

Q: How did you feel after you realized God was calling you to the ministry? A: Wow! for me as, my person is shy. It really took me a minute as to walk into ministering publicly, as persay to ministering one-on-one. As for me, I had been through so many things in my childhood until, to know that the Lord wanted to use me, a little country Girl from Beaumont, Mississippi, I had to learn, that your past does not define you and even when man rejects you, the Lord accepts. A wise man once told me, that “Suffering was a trademan of a true child of God.” In other words, God don’t ever waist His trials on anyone, every thing that you’ve ever been through, it all works together for the good! Romans 8:28. I tell people even today, the scripture states, “Many are called, but few are chosen, and because I’m chosen, it causes me to total depend on Him.

Q: Did you attend school for ministry? If so, where (if applicable) A: No, I do not come against any one that went to school for ministry, But, I do believe, that ministers are not made, but they are born, in the book of states of Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. Knowledge is powerful, there is nothing wrong with going to school and enhancing that, which he have called you to do.

Q: What opposition did you face? With being a woman in ministry did you face opposition from male clergy? A: As a Woman in ministry, and coming from my fore-fathers, that did not believe in women in ministry, was the hardest part. Because every daughter wants to please her father (spiritually or naturally) and even today, I yet wonder is he pleased. Also, knowing that in the last days, He would pour out His spirit on all mankind, and that we are living in the last days, none of us are exempt, not even the children. We must fullfill His purpose in the earth.

Q: What are some of your greatest achievements in ministry? A: Other than seeing people healed, set free and delivered. I think, to watch my children grow up in the house of God, serving the Lord and the House of God and teaching their children to love the Lord, gives me great joy and peace.

Lady

DONNA BEARD 17

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WOMEN IN MINISTRY - LADY DONNA BEARD necessity. And we were one of the blessed ones, Q: How did being in the ministry affect by living through it and gaining this wisdom, your marriage/family/children? A: Having a Man of God in demand, and co- our children were healed and they are all in the pastoring/overseeing, several ministries and raising children, an unjust balance is an abomination. If one does not have a balance, something or someone is going to go liking. I remember we had been in ministry for so long, we lived with it, bought home with us, we literally became roommates and bought much strain on the marriage and the family, we almost lost it all. We would be burned out, and felt like we had sin, to not pick up that phone call or take a couple days off for quality time or a little R and R. And everybody business in your home, your only refuge. And then taking for granted that your children were alright, because they were in the house of God. They were the Isaiah many days, and it began to cause them to be bitter, angry and neglected. I will tell anyone, be careful in ministry, of becoming a Hero to others and a zero to your family. Quality time and enjoying and watching and listening to whats going on in their lives is a

ministry with a real relationship and serving the House of God.

Q: What wisdom would you share with another woman getting involved in ministry? What advice would you give her? A: To make sure that home is covered and taking care of, the First church is the family, charity begins at home and then spread abroad. In an hour such as this covering is necessary. And as the past year, in the media and close to home, so many of our co-labors in the gospel, had heart-attacks because of the demand of ministry, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s okay to take a sabbatical or time off to refuel or refresh. There are times in ministry, we are leading while bleeding, its blessing to have a spiritual mother or father, that shoulders are broad enough that you can lay your head on their shoulders to get Godly counsel or wisdom.

Thought of The Day

Your value does not decrease based on someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inability to see your worth.

by Stephanie L. McKenny

Not too long ago, my husband preached a message that challenged us to question what kind of fruit we were bearing. So, I present this same question to everyone that is reading this. What are some things that you are doing that are producing fruit? I know you may even consider some things that you’ve done in the past, but what have you accomplished recently? What fruit are you producing? How is your garden growing with what you have accomplished for the Lord? I pose these questions not to discredit your achievements, but to challenge you to examine where you are and where you need to be. Whether you realize it or not, there is something that God would desire for you to accomplish in the earth. He has strategically placed the gifts, abilities and the ideas within each and every one of us to produce the fruit that He knows dwells within us. It is up to us to put those abilities to action by producing the fruit that we are capable of. We are told in John 15:1-7, that whatever branch is not bearing fruit that God takes it away. I love how God operates so efficiently in our lives. He recognizes what isn’t working for us and He takes it away. That is so amazing. So many times we P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

may fight to keep things or people in our lives, but in actuality they may not need to be there because it’s not causing us to bear fruit. God wants us to bear fruit. He wants us to fulfill the assignment over our lives. So when it seems as though some plucking, pulling and tearing away of things in our lives, it could very well be that God is taking some things and some people out of your life so that you can produce fruit. In other words, those things and those people have been a hindrance to your overall growth and ability to produce fruit. It doesn’t stop there. Not only does God take away things in our lives that are not bearing us fruit, but He also prunes the branches that are bearing fruit. Yes, even when you are bearing fruit, God will take His spiritual cutters and prune the areas where we need some work on so that we can produce more fruit. Isn’t God amazing! God recognizes what we are capable of and He doesn’t allow us to walk in mediocrity. He looks for FRUIT! I encourage you my dear Sister….allow God to take away those things that are not causing you to bear fruit and prune those areas that are and walk in your divine purpose and calling.

Why

Wait? by LeTasha S. Robinson

In the world we currently live in, patience isn’t a virtue. Within a matter of minutes you can have your food ready, and get an oil change in less than 20 minutes; you have a cell phone so you can always be reached. There is no need to wait and when we have to it is not going to be good for the person on the other side of the counter. We are currently living in a society that is driven by time. I have to be to work by 8 a.m. out by 5 p.m., etc. You find most Americans in a rush hence the phrase “Rush Hour.” So if we are constantly in a rush in our overall lives; that may explain why so many people are in a rush when it comes to being in a relationship. Divorces have become more and more common; everything we watch tells us that we have to be in a relationship. If you aren’t you are told something must be wrong with that person. Unfortunately it normally comes from close family and friends.

Most people have tried to do it all, from online dating to blind dates, just to satisfy that need to not be alone. However, was the relationship really for you or for the eyes that are watching you? Even I found myself on the roller coaster of trying to find a mate and fortunately for me that hasn’t happened yet. Why do I say fortunately? I’m glad you asked! Three simple words explain the situation, “I wasn’t Ready.” I thought I was because everyone kept telling me that I better go ahead and have some babies, I better get a man soon, Tasha must be gay, I know you are lonely. I found myself wanting to be in a relationship not because I had a heart desire to be in one but because I wanted to appease the eyes that were watching me and I found myself in the wrong types of relationships. I found myself being in physical, emotional, and sexual abusive relationships and because the eyes that were still watching, I found myself staying in those relationships because it was better to have someone than no one at all. That’s a lie from the pits of hell. It is not okay to have someone that can’t see the King or Queen in you and make you feel like a servant. God wants us in healthy relationship that can build us and that can only be done if we learn to wait P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

WHY WAIT? Ephesians 4:19 Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more. (NIV) Ephesians 5:3 Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God’s people. (NLT) We live in a society that tells us that in order for a man or a woman to show us that they love us they must have sex with us. However, the Bible says that sex is for marriage. The world has taught us to indulge in it, which has caused many people to rush into a relationship for it. Sex complicates things and all of a sudden where it wasn’t a rush you find yourself rushing trying to be in a relationship with someone because you have overindulged in something that you should have never explored. If you take into consideration how many failed relationships that you have had, most of them included sex and now you are no longer with that person and most of the time some type of hate or a strong dislike is associated with that person. Most relationships that have lasted started with a friendship. I believe they lasted because they didn’t rush. Using an older terminology you were allowed to “court” that person. You learned that person’s likes, dislikes; you had nothing to gain from that person, but a great friend. Because that was your focus you didn’t rush anything, things happened naturally. You didn’t spend money, time, and more importantly you didn’t have sex with them. Many people find it odd or extremely difficult to be around an “ex” who they truly cared for especially when children are involved because they have to deal with the fact that they are no longer with that person. I said some not all because that is not the case for everyone, but if you have waited and gotten to know that person a lot of heartache, and tears could have been avoided.Don’t be so quick to run into a title of

Mrs. So and So. Work on your friendship. Get to know the person. Find out something new about that person and take interests in what they are interested in. Don’t be so quick to share your hurts, pains, and most importantly your past. This could lead you to a path of destruction so make sure you have a solid foundation and you know that person character before sharing specific details of your past. Remember a chameleon can only hide behind their camouflage for a little while before having to turn back to its true nature. It is important to wait, there is virtue in waiting. A baby won’t make anyone stay, nor will sex. It is important to work on yourself to become the person that you desire to be and everything else will fall in place. You don’t need a mate as the world likes to make you think that you do, you don’t. Being in a relationship is an added thing. We are told in Matthew 6:33 to seek the Kingdom of God and all those other things will be added. You need God! He said He will supply all of your need. You don’t need a man or a woman to complete you, to make you feel special, to make you feel wanted. All that comes with learning to love the TRUE Father and that is the BIG GOD! When you learn to love Him and rely on HIM then and only THEN will you have the ability to learn how to love yourself. A mate will never be able to love you the way that you desire. If you look towards a man to provide you the love that you feel as though you don’t have, you will always be left with insecurities. Feeling as though you must do anything and put up with anything because if he leaves you, who will love you then. God said He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5 KJV). When all else fails GOD IS STILL GOD and at the end of the day that is what you NEED. Having a mate is a WANT. This may cause for nights with just you, but would you rather be greedy and indulge in something for a little while and contract a disease, get pregnant, or being left feeling used? None of this is good so think twice before you rush off to get into a relationship. It’s virtue in the wait!

If I Am My Sister’s Keeper... Then Where Are Mine? BY JENEEN JEFFERSON Let’s all take a minute to think about that one person who you never see cry, but is your shoulder to cry on, always has a smile, who is always the listening ear, who is always there for advice, your financial institute when needed, takes care of everyone else and who always has the encouraging words for you. So, do you have them pictured? Good, now when was the last time you were that to THEM? Precisely, it’s been that long. I understand that the reason why is because most people are under the misguided impression that the Superman and Wonder Woman in our lives never get weak. This is the farthest thing from the truth. So I am here to debunk a few myths for you regarding the strong people in your lives. It is so easy for people to misunderstand the strength of the person who has been that solid rock in their lives. It is also easy for it to be taken advantage of as well because they are expected to keep going without question. A strong person has to be allowed time to recover from their own setbacks, pains or from simply being tired, so that they can go back to being who they are made to be.....STRONG. Think about it like this, do we P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

expect a sprinter to keep running with a broken leg? Do we expect a car to keep running without gas? Do we expect birds to fly with a broken wing? Do you expect money to come from the machine when you have not made any deposits? So why do we expect the people in our lives who are known for their great strength to not be in need of inspiration, motivation, an ear to vent and a shoulder to cry on? It is this simple, eventually a doctor will need a doctor, a lawyer will need a lawyer, a teacher will need a teacher, a counselor will need a counselor, a preacher will need a preacher and the strong person in your life will need YOU! My challenge for you..... Go and call, email or text someone who you know is always bearing the burdens of others, encouraging others, never shows their own tears and who always appears to be “ok” and give to them what they have been to you and others! Yes...you are your brother’s and sister’s keeper.

SISTERS KEEPER

FACTS: Just because you never see the Super Hero cry doesn’t mean that they don’t. It just means they are holding it in trying not to appear weak to the people who rely on them to remain strong. Usually when the Super Hero is helping to carry the weight of burdens, issues, pains etc. it is because they have pushed their own to the side in order to make room for yours. Super Heroes really want you to ask them how they are and really mean it. Super Heroes need someone who is “safe” enough for them to expose their weakness to without confusing it with them being weak. One word of encouragement is like gas in an empty tank to the Super Hero. Super Heroes want to be allowed to have bad days too. They are really not super human, even though you view them as a Super Hero.

WOMEN IN MINISTRY

Prophetess

ANGELA KIRKSEY Q: How long have you been in ministry? A: I’ve been in ministry for 28 years.

Q: How did you feel after you realized God was calling you to the ministry?

A: Well seeing that I wasn’t raised in church it was very strange to me at the time.

Q: Did you attend school for ministry? If so, where? (if applicable)

A: No, I haven’t at this time gone to school. However, I am presently attending in this seminar to come.

Q: What opposition did you face? With being a woman in ministry did you face opposition from male clergy?

A: I was fortunate enough to come from a ministry that believed in Women Preachers. Therefore, it was very good. A. No I did not.

Q: What are some of your greatest achievements in ministry?

A: God has allowed me, as his servant, to embrace ministries wherein women weren’t given the privilege and opportunity to minister in their pulpits. I have been given the honor to be the first female preacher to preach in several congregations. Some allowed me to minister from their pulpit and from the floor. I have been the P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

first preacher to ever minister in a New Years Revival which was carried on for 43 years. God has allowed me to add to the ministry of Kingdom Builders International Ministries to open the School of the Prophets. I’ve been on TBN several times in my local city as well as hosting it also. And I’ve been on many radio stations. God has allowed me to minister outside the country and I will be traveling outside the country this year as well. I’ve written a book entitled, “Training the Leader Within You.”

Q: How did being in the ministry affect your marriage/family/children?

A: Ministry has always been both of our passion. When we married, he was already ministering and so was I. The hardest part for me at this time was learning how to let him led. This wasn’t a big challenge for me but many adjustments had to be made on both our parts. As any couple would we had many up’s and downs in ministry. For instance, “I wanted him to pray like I would pray; I wanted him to preach like many of those from the ministry in which I attend.” I can recall when he would pray, he held his ear. Of course, this annoyed me! But when I prayed, I cried a lot! My crying frustrated him. We had to learn to accept each other’s differences. Over the years, we embraced many challenges that it would take a bookto actually reveal it all. One other thing is that, we had to except the fact that everyone would not want me as a speaker and vice versa. There were many obstacles which we faced, overcome and conquered together. Even dealing with the opposite sex attraction.

WOMEN IN MINISTRY • PROPHETESS ANGELA KIRKSEY We have never really actually had problems with our families. They may not have understood our purpose or destiny, but nothing traumatic that will cause a great ripe in our relationship with our families. He comes from a family full of preachers and we are trying to catch up to that enormous gap (thought I would put a little humor in there). Now when it comes to our children, if I could, I would do so many things over again. Because children suffer in ministry as well as their parents in ministry. The first thing I would’ve changed is isolating them more from getting attached to other children who were part of the ministry. Children see a lot in ministry when we don’t think they see! Yet, I knew they need friends! I wasn’t prepared for when parents leave the ministry and their children have to leave also. I was naïve back then. However, our children have been our gift to our ministry. They are the musicians, Praise Leaders, and even usher. We where continuously on the road doing ministry. One thing I am extremely grateful for is we didn’t take their childhood away from them. We allowed them to be teenagers and have their private moments. For me, I guess I wanted them to uphold the Preachers Kid Image Awards when we were among other church people. God had to deliver me from the pressure to perform. It was then God taught me how to allow Him to have a personal encounter with my children. I had to step back and give them time to know Him for themselves. Yes, they’ve had their crying moments to where they no longer wanted the church lifestyle. Yes, they’ve acted out just as well. Are they all saved? No! Do I pressure them about being saved? No! They too will have to develop and find their relationship with God. But for now, I enjoy being their mom and even their friends! God has his perfect timing for them.

Q: What wisdom would you share with another woman getting involved in ministry? What advice would you give her?

A: The first thing I would share is, Know who you are! It is easy for others to form their opinions concerning you. They will try to transform you into the image of others which will make it impossible for you to enjoy your journey in the Lord. Knowing who you are can carry you to many places in the Kingdom verses not knowing. Make sure you have a life outside of ministry and away from those who would drain you to always minister to them. Keep a Godgiven balance in your life. Never be afraid to express your pain and discomfort with your spouse or your confidant. Holding things in will only build bitterness, anger and many other emotions you will face in ministry. Never allow anyone to bring you information on your spouse. It may be very truthful, but sometimes you have to cover your domain at any given cost. Finally, always find some me time for you and God! Keep a consistent prayer life before the Lord.

P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

WOMEN IN MINISTRY

Pastor

Laytecia McKinney

Masters of Divinity and Christian Counseling from Tampa Bay Bible College.

Q: How long have you been in ministry? A: I have been preaching the Gospel for 26 years and have been pastoring for 10 years. Q: How did you feel after you realized God was calling you to the ministry? A: When I was first called to ministry at the age of 23 years old, I was very zealous, excited and ready to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ to world! However, when I was called to pastor, it was a very humbling experience that came with me questioning God, “Are you sure!” I did not answer the call quickly, it took 2 ½ years of the Lord calling me, chastising me and empowering me to answer the call. Q: Did you attend school for ministry? If so, where? (if applicable). A: I graduated from Without Walls International Church’s Master Pastor Internship Program as a Summa Cum Laude graduate. I earned my Associates of Theology from Faith Theology Seminary as a Cum Laude graduate and my

Q: What opposition did you face? A: With being a woman in ministry did you face opposition from male clergy? I would say as a woman Pastor, one of the greatest oppositions that I have faced was from male clergy’s telling some of my parishioners that a woman was not called to preach and they were in error under a woman Pastor! The spirit of God is neither male nor female and furthermore when God wants to get something done in the earth, all He is looking for is an willing vessel. Another area were the lack of men in my church but through prayer and standing strong, God has added and is continuing to add mighty men of valor to the church. Q: What are some of your greatest achievements in ministry? A: Establishing Victory Temple Outreach Ministry, Inc. along with all the in house and outreach ministries which has been used to bring salvation, deliverance and healing to many. Founding and establishing WOW Ministries, Inc. (Women of Wisdom). Also, in 1996 I was recognized as a Women of Zion; in 2007 I was a recipient of the 2007 Employee History Awarded by the City of Tampa and in 2013 I was chosen as the Female Pastor of the Year for the City of Tampa by On Que Magazine.

WOMEN IN MINISTRY - LAYTECIA MCKINNEY Q: How did being in the ministry affect your marriage/family/children? A: I had to learn how to balance my time that I was not neglecting my wifely or motherly duties. You must know and understand that you are not called to EVERYBODY, you must know the ones that you are and not overextend yourself. Q: What wisdom would you share with another woman getting involved in ministry? What advice would you give her? A: I would advise her to seek an Apostolic covering over her ministry. Someone that will provide godly counsel, instruction, constructive criticism, strategies for economic development of the ministry and empowerment. Also, do not believe everything people will tell you such as “It’s going to hard”…..what God ordains you for, he gives you the grace to endure all the challenges that come along with it and the

finances to sustain it. Surround yourself with positive and proven people. Seek God for your own vision, do not try to model or mimic anyone else or their ministry, but allow God to birth out your own originality. Do not be afraid to make big moves when God speaks even if you are just getting started!

Charging It To Principle BY CHARISMA FLOYD One of the most talked about topics among my friends and I is the subject of romantic relationships. It always fascinates me that the initial conversation could be deeply intellectual in nature, but somehow it always shifts to talk about romantic endeavors. Usually, either I or one of my companions spends at least thirty minutes lamenting about another tragic relationship. Interestingly, the failure of the relationship is always an unexpected surprise. No one saw the breakup coming and this surprise is usually justified with lines like: “Things were going so good.” “We spent so much time together.” “He asked me to meet his momma.” “We talked for hours on the phone.” And my favorite, “He is a really good guy.” Once again, disappointment sets in as we all realize that yet again, the elusive “Mr. Boaz” slipped through our fingers. We sit dumbfounded that such a promising relationship is no more. What is really hilarious about this whole exchange is that no one ever talks about the fact that a pattern is occurring week after week, month after month and year after year. In the words of a dear friend, “we just charge it to the game” and figure better luck next time and start the process all over again. After a bit of introspection and countless conversations, I came to the conclusion that there just had to be a better way. I do not know about anyone else, but I do not like wasting time or being

repeatedly disappointed. There just had to be a principle and design for dating. After praying and observing myself and others, I discovered that the entire decision to enter into a relationship has usually been based on emotions and feelings, and not on biblical principles. In some strange way the pursuit of love, romance, and marriage has become an idol for many women. Rather than focusing on pursuing God and learning who we are in Christ, we have become obsessed with finding love, and love has become our god. This is oxymoronic in nature as God is love, and it is His love that causes us to love ourselves and have the correct image and perspective of ourselves. Without taking the time to seek God’s wisdom and purpose for living, we are doomed to a life of insanity, doing the same things over and over and getting the same results. It is key that we take the time to really seek to come to an understanding about God’s intended plan for relationships. It is important to understand godly principles and godly wisdom. The Word of God encourages us in James 1:5 to ask for wisdom. Doing so, will help us to really examine if we have selfish motives for entering into a new relationship. It is good to ask yourself: 1. Am I getting into this relationship because I want others to admire how I was able to get this type of man? 2. Am I lonely and just want to use this man as a teddy bear? 3. Do I just want to prove my femininity? 4. Do I just want to be able to say that I have a boyfriend? 5. Am I just feeling insecure and want to use his masculinity as a way to feel secure?

Charging It To Principle (cont’d) 6. Can this man help me to fulfill God’s purpose in my life? 7. Do I truly admire this man’s character or does he have a desirable personality type? I have learned to measure myself against the Word of God, and allow God’s Word to transform my thinking on relationships. I am learning that feelings change and are a dangerous and weak foundation for any relationship, but building your relationship on godly principles will save you lots of confusion, wasted time, and heartbreak down the road. Most importantly, God’s Word can be trusted and looked to for guidance when feelings become overwhelming and fluctuate with each new experience.

experiences.” Let’s examine the foundation of our relationships and examine our motive behind initiating a new relationship. Feelings change like the wind and are the perfect recipe for instability. No amount of time spent, meeting relatives, or long conversations can ever be the remedy to repair a faulty foundation or a relationship that defies God’s will. Finally, rather than lament about another failed relationship, I will rejoice, acknowledge, and embrace the fact that there is a better way to navigate through the dating experience with godly principles.

So in summation, I challenge myself and the women who read this article to date on purpose and “charge it all to the Word” and not on “random

P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

Q&A

MAMMOGRAMS

Q: What is a mammogram? A: A mammogram is a low-dose x-ray exam of the

foundby a mammogram, but they may be found in a clinical breast exam. Checking your own breasts for lumps or other changes is called a breast selfexam (BSE). Studies so far have not shown that BSE alone helps reduce the number of deaths from breast cancer. BSE should not take the place of routine clinical breast exams and mammograms. If you choose to do BSE, remember that breast changes can occur because of pregnancy, aging, menopause, menstrual cycles, or from taking birth control pills or other hormones. It is normal for breasts to feel a little lumpy and uneven. Also, it is common for breasts to be swollen and tender right before or during a menstrual period. If you notice any unusual changes in your breasts, contact your doctor.

Q: What is the best method of detecting breast cancer as early as possible? A: A high-quality mammogram plus a clinical

Q: How is a mammogram done? A: You stand in front of a special x-ray machine.

breasts to look for changes that are not normal. The results are recorded on x-ray film or directly into a computer for a doctor called a radiologist to examine. A mammogram allows the doctor to have a closer look for changes in breast tissue that cannot be felt during a breast exam. It is used for women who have no breast complaints and for women who have breast symptoms, such as a change in the shape or size of a breast, a lump, nipple discharge, or pain. Breast changes occur in almost all women. In fact, most of these changes are not cancer and are called “benign,” but only a doctor can know for sure. Breast changes can also happen monthly, due to your menstrual period.

MAMMOGRAMS Q: What is a mammogram? A: A mammogram is a low-dose x-ray exam of the

Q: How is a mammogram done? A: You stand in front of a special x-ray machine.

Q: What is the best method of detecting breast cancer as early as possible? A: A high-quality mammogram plus a clinical

Q: Are there different types of mammograms?

breast exam, an exam done by your doctor, is the most effective way to detect breast cancer early. Finding breast cancer early greatly improves a woman’s chances for successful treatment. Like any test, mammograms have both benefits and limitations. For example, some cancers can’t be foundby a mammogram, but they may be found in a clinical breast exam. Checking your own breasts for lumps or other changes is called a breast selfexam (BSE). Studies so far have not shown that BSE alone helps reduce the number of deaths from breast cancer. BSE should not take the place of routine clinical breast exams and mammograms. If you choose to do BSE, remember that breast changes can occur because of pregnancy, aging, menopause, menstrual cycles, or from taking birth control pills or other hormones. It is normal for breasts to feel a little lumpy and uneven. Also, it is common for breasts to be swollen and tender right before or during a menstrual period. If you notice any unusual changes in your breasts, contact your doctor.

P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

The person who takes the x-rays, called a radiologic technician, places your breasts, one at a time, between an x-ray plate and a plastic plate. These plates are attached to the x-ray machine and compress the breasts to flatten them. This spreads the breast tissue out to obtain a clearer picture. You will feel pressure on your breast for a few seconds. It may cause you some discomfort; you might feel squeezed or pinched. This feeling only lasts for a few seconds, and the flatter your breast, the better the picture. Most often, two pictures are taken of each breast— one from the side and one from above. A screening mammogram takes about 20 minutes from start to finish. A: There are two kinds of mammograms: screening and diagnostic. • Screening mammograms usually involves two x-rays of each breast. Screening mammograms can detect lumps or tumors that cannot be felt. They can also find microcalcifications (my-kro-kalsi-fi-KAY-shuns) or tiny deposits of calcium in the breast, which sometimes mean that breast cancer is present. • Diagnostic mammograms are used to check for breast cancer after a lump or other symptom or sign of breast cancer has been found. Signs of breast cancer may include pain, thickened skin on the breast, nipple discharge, or a change in breast size or shape. This type of mammogram also can be used to find out more about breast changes found on a screening mammogram, or to view breast tissue that is hard to see on a screening mammogram. A diagnostic mammogram takes longer than a screening mammogram because it involves more x-rays in order to obtain views of the breast from several angles. But women with dense breasts who are pre- or perimenopausal, or who are younger than age 50, may benefit from having a digital rather than a film mammogram.

MAMMOGRAMS

Q: How often should I get a mammogram? A: Here are the United States Preventive Services Task Force (USPSTF) recommendations: • Women ages 50-74 years should get a mammogram every 2 years • Women younger than 50 should talk to a doctor about when to start and how often to have a mammogram.

due to cancer or to some other cause. Your doctor may ask about your personal and family medical history. You may have a physical exam. Your doctor also may order some of these tests: • Diagnostic mammogram • Ultrasound • Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) • Biopsy

Q: What can mammograms show? A: The radiologist will look at your x-rays for breast changes that do not look normal and for differences in each breast. He or she will compare your past mammograms with your most recent one to check for changes. The doctor will also look for lumps and calcifications. Q: What if my screening mammogram shows a problem? A: If you have a screening test result that suggests cancer, your doctor must find out whether it is

Q: Where can I get a high-quality mammogram? A: Women can get high-quality mammograms in breast clinics, hospital radiology departments, mobile vans, private radiology offices, and doctors’ offices.

FOR MORE INFO CONTACT: womenshealth.gov or Ph: 800-994-9662 THE FOLLOWING ORGANIZATIONS: National Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program Ph: 800-232-4636 www.cdc.gov/cancer/nbccedp National Cancer Institute, NIH, HHS Ph: 800-422-6237 • www.cancer.gov Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, HHS Ph: Ph: 800-633-4227 www.cms.hhs.gov American Cancer Society Ph: 800-227-2345 • www.cancer.org Susan G. Komen for the Cure Ph: 877-465-6636 • www.komen.org P E A R L S I S TA H S M AG A Z I N E

Source: www.womenshealth.gov | 800-994-9662

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Chasing your fears! By: Keisha A. Rivers Shorty

I know what you’re thinking‐‐”What? Don’t you have that backwards? WHY would I want to chase things that I’m afraid of?”

or box because we don’t want to experience the fear that comes with experiencing new things and new heights.

Conventional wisdom says that you should chase your dreams in order to create and

The two go hand in hand. Fear comes with the unknown and success is as a result of pushing yourself beyond your current level or state of being‐‐essentially pushing yourself into the unknown‐‐or bottom line, chasing your fear. If you truly examine the reasons why we never start—or finish—a journey, you’ll find the litany of fears that are standing between you and the success that you crave and desire. In order to achieve the success that you crave, you need to get to the other side of the fear.

achieve the life that you want, right? How many self‐help books, conferences, coaches and gurus remind us on a daily basis to ditch our fears, or move past our fears in order to have the life that we want? How many of them focus solely on our dreams as the path to success and happiness? But really, when you take time to think about it, a lot of times the reason that we don’t achieve the success that we really want is because we’re afraid. Afraid of failure. Afraid of disappointment. Afraid of what others may say about us. Afraid that we’re not good enough. Afraid of what will happen if we DON’T succeed.

Let me let you in on a little secret. If you don’t experience and face the fear, you’ll never experience and achieve success.

We spend most of our lives running away from our fears primarily because we don’t want to face those things that remind us that we’re less than perfect‐‐‐therefore we don’t act. We do nothing, so we remain the same.

Fear of speaking up; fear of speaking out; fear of taking a risk; fear of being seen; fear of not being enough—whatever your fear, chase them, overcome them by strategically attacking them and then you will find yourself closer to achieving your dreams and the success that you crave. So the next time you find yourself shaking in your boots at the prospect of doing something new that is so completely beyond you, don’t turn and run in the other direction. Instead, chase the fear, follow the feeling of anticipation and trepidation, embrace the uncertainty, and attack them strategically so you can experience the exhilaration of success.

So when you really look at it, what that actually boils down to is a fear of going after success. Far too often, instead of venturing outside of our comfort zones, the things that we’re used to and know ‐‐we instead opt to stay in our own little cage

©2014 KARS ~ Keisha A Rivers Shorty is a personal and professional development strategist, consultant, speaker and author who assists clients in fueling their passion; aligning with their purpose and building their legacy through acquiring knowledge of self (Released & Ready); knowledge of strategies (BeastMode Boot Camp) and knowledge of systems (The KARS Institute). Connect with her on social media or visit her website at www.releasedandready.com and www.karsinstitute.org for details.

P E A R L S I S TA H S M A G A Z I N E

What Are You Sacrificing With Your Yes?

It is easy to lose ourselves with the many roles that we have in life – wife, mother, employee, employer, friend, volunteer, supporter, the list is endless. There may come a time when you feel yourself moving forward, getting things done and accomplishing absolutely nothing at all that aligns with your true calling and purpose. Those that are here may feel as though they are trying to swim against a current. There are days that it is difficult to push forward, but you continue to do so because life demands it. Or does it? Many women have been conditioned to measure who they are and what they accomplish by how much they are able to cross off their to‐do lists. Those accomplishments are worn as a badge of honor. The act of being exhausted – mentally and physically – is viewed as a part of daily life and a necessity for making it. Is making it worth sacrificing who you are?

The majority would respond with a resounding no to that question. What can we do on a daily basis to remain true to who we are while accomplishing the needed tasks that our lives demand? The first step is acknowledging and accepting that your busy‐ness does not define you. What it does is keep you moving and active. For some being overly task‐oriented is a coping mechanism or a way of procrastinating, but it is not who you are. Your daily actions are what you do and there is a difference. Next, it is important to have a clear understanding of what it is we truly want to accomplish – personally and professionally. Who and what are your true priorities at this stage in your life?

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What Are You Sacrificing With Your Yes? Are the commitments you make aligning with those priorities? Do you have a strategic plan and outline of what steps you should take along your journey? Try this for the next week ‐ take a moment to ask yourself before committing to an activity, project or event if it aligns with those priorities. Then identify what you are saying no to by saying yes. Another event, family time, self‐care time? That reflection may (or may not) cause you to re‐think your choices. Finally, we must take care of ourselves. Listen to our mind, body and soul and know when it is time to let them rest and rejuvenate. The true badge of honor lies not within the tasks we complete but the legacy we are building for ourselves and our loved ones.

There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil. This also, I saw, is from the hand of God, for apart from him who can eat or who can have enjoyment? ‐ Ecclesiastes 2:24‐25 On those days you feel pressed and pushed with being busy, take the time to ask yourself when was the last time you found enjoyment in your toil. That question may very well be the gateway to redirecting your path.

When you find yourself pressed to push yourself beyond your body’s signs and signals to rest or forego downtime with your loved ones to do “one more thing” reflect on this:

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Secrets to Overcoming a Marketing Setback By Angel Coleman

Marketing is an essential part of running a successful business. Marketing allows you to communicate and connect with your target audience. No matter how much time, money and energy you put into a marketing strategy, you may not get the results you envisioned in your head. But, before you give up or condemn a tactic, there are a few do’s and don’ts to consider.

Facebook Ad campaign and people are clicking on your ad but no one is opting in, that could simple mean that your ad and landing page copy aren’t congruent. Or maybe a campaign was working really well, then all of a sudden your conversion rate dropped significantly. What changed? You definitely want to discover the root of the problem.

#1 Don’t Jump to Conclusions One of the biggest mistakes people make is to have an immediate opinion. Give yourself and your company an opportunity to review what went wrong. It may not be obvious from the outside. Take the time to dissect each phase from beginning to the end. Truly think about whereyou could improve? What worked as planned? What subtle changes can you make that can boost the results?

#3 Uncover New Opportunities Despite how bad a situation may seem; you can usually find a new opportunity. Whether it’s learning more about who you serve, your industry, or to discover which strategies work best for your product or service. The more strategies you try the better chance you have in discovering what really resonates well with your audience. Stepping out of your marketing

Continued

5 Secrets to Overcoming a Marketing Setback Marketing is an essential part of running a successful business. Marketing allows you to communicate and connect with your target audience. No matter how much time, money and energy you put into a marketing strategy, you may not get the results you envisioned in your head. But, before you give up or condemn a tactic, there are a few do’s and don’ts to consider.

#2 Discover the Root of the Problem There are a few key factors that can cause a marketing strategy to perform poorly. Ideally, you want to identify the root of the problem. Was it audience targeting, the calltoaction or messaging? For example, if you started a Facebook Ad campaign and people are clicking on your ad but no one is opting in, that could simple mean that your ad and landing page copy aren’t congruent. Or maybe a campaign was working really well, then all of a sudden your conversion rate dropped significantly. What changed? You definitely want to discover the root of the problem.

Minister. Author. Entrepreneur.

Do you need a speaker for your event? Co-Pastor Stephanie McKenny, is an anointed speaker and workshop facilitator. Stephanie conducts an annual women’s retreat and facilitates various workshops/ conferences for women. Stephanie McKenny is the Founder of P.E.A.R.L. Sistahs, LLC and P.E.A.R.L. Sistahs Magazine. Pastor McKenny is currently in the process of organizing a non-profit organization for girls (Pearly Girls Empowerment Program). Co-Pastor Stephanie McKenny is an author of six books and the owner of J & J Publishing Company. If you need an impactful speaker for your next event do not hesitate to Book Co-Pastor Stephanie McKenny! FOR BOOKING: 803.968.5196 • slmckenny@gmail.com

What: Come and be part of Our Nations’ History, As we gather to “Pray for Our Nation” When: 22 Oct 2016 Where: Washington, D.C. @ The Lincoln Memorial 2 Lincoln Memorial Cir NW, Washington, DC 20037 Time: 10AM To sign up or get involved call #GOTN

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